#it can apply to platonic relationships if you want
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miwiheroes · 2 days ago
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Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love + Stranger Things Couples
This is very different from my other posts on here, but I was inspired by @hawkinsschoolcounselor to make this. Just wanted to give this tag some of my own insight from a Psychology student's perspective, specifically talking about the Triangular Theory of Love (TTL) in relation to couples (whether they are platonic or romantic or not) on Stranger Things. I'm not here to say that the Duffer Brothers specifically took inspiration for their couples from this theoretical model, just that this is one of the many theoretical models of relationships that can be applied to how people view love. Therefore, a writer would have written real life people's experiences of love into the show.
(Just want to quickly add -- this theory was made in the 80s. The most common criticism of this model is that it is made on the basis of westernised ideals of love. It also does not take asexuality or aromanticism into account.)
First of all, an Introduction to the TTL:
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Imagine yourself a triangle. Every triangle has three sides. Each side of this triangle is an essential component to love. It’s the combination of these elements that creates the different types of love we experience.
First, we have Intimacy, which isn't your classic physical intimacy that you know (e.g. hugging, kissing). It's basically the emotional side of love. Can you tell this person your deepest secrets? Can you trust them? Do you two have similar interests? Can you have a laugh? Intimacy is what makes us feel understood and accepted for who we are.
Next, is Passion, which is the fire, the spark, the physical attraction that ignites the magnetic pull between two people. The chemistry, the electricity, you could say. We feel this at the beginning of most relationships, that intense desire to be with someone, emotionally and physically.
Lastly is Commitment. This is the decision to stay, to continue even if something changes. This can be for various reasons like investments you've made in the relationship, the promises you've made to someone.
Each of these components are associated with a certain type of love.
Nonlove -- This relationship has neither intimacy, commitment, or passion. You are acquaintances with this person.
Liking -- This relationship has intimacy only. This is a friendship, without commitment or passion that a romantic relationship has.
Infatuation -- Only has passion. It's exciting, overwhelming, but there's no emotional connection, trust, or commitment.
Empty -- Only has commitment. The relationship is stable and safe, but has no real connection or passion that it may once have had or never had.
Companionate -- This relationship his intimacy and commitment, but it does not have passion. This could be a very close friend, or a couple that may be in love but do not have physical attraction to one another.
Romantic -- You are intimate with this person and have passion with them, but you are not yet committed. For example, a partner that you've been dating for a short time.
Fatuous -- The presence of passion and commitment, but without intimacy. For example, two people who barely know each other can get married super quick on a whim.
Consummate -- Is the 'ideal' love. This is the complete, balanced love we all strive for. It’s a mix of deep emotional connection, physical attraction, and a strong, lasting commitment.
So how does this relate to Stranger Things?
I do believe we can sort of apply these definitions of love to many different duos in ST, and see what this means for them in the future. Love can also be different on either side, for example, on side of the duo may see passion in their love, while the other side sees none.
BTW you may notice that I'm not going to include Byler or Mileven in this first list, I will diagnose them after all the other duos in the show. So scroll down if you want to only see them.
Nonlove
This would be a duo from ST that really has no interaction with each other. No commitment, no emotional connection, no physical connection. I guess we can just pick people who've barely had an interaction, like Steve and Will. Eddie and Hopper. Mike and Robin (not yet anyways).
Liking
E.g. Joyce and Murray, Mike and Lucas. Just friends, but they are friends enough that they have believable closeness and an understanding of one another. More examples include all the party's friendships with each other (except Mike and Will). I don't want to really dumb them down into not being committed toward each other, but we can see that they're not dependent on each other in a way that's got more emotional depth than some other platonic duos in the show.
Infatuation
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The only notable one that I can think of here is Stancy, more specifically on Nancy's side. This means she only has passion with him, aka, physical attraction. She's not intimate with him (in this model's definition at least). This model's definition of intimate means sharing deep secrets and trusting each other. During S1, Nancy's reason for being with Steve was because he was popular and she was just excited to be with the most desire guy in high school. She didn't confide in him about her emotional turmoil, she didn't understand his decisions and he didn't understand hers. In S2, this is the same. The only time that she confronted him was when she was drunk, other times she didn't feel he understood her enough like Jonathan did.
She also wasn't committed to him, which makes sense, because she had a far more emotional intimacy with Jonathan.
Empty
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The first one that comes to mind ^. Obviously, this isn't necessarily fully in line with the psychological definition of 'Empty love', because Karen is not fully committed to Ted in S2 or S3, but ultimately she does make the decision not to cheat on her husband because of her commitment to her family. They have no intimacy and no passion (Ted's bed is literally downstairs). This is one of those relationships where people don't even have to ask why they don't get a divorce -- because they're too committed, which is their downfall.
Companionate
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I believe Steve and Robin are different to those friendships in the 'Liking' category. They have intimacy, because they confide in each other and understand each other on a deeper level. But they're also committed to each other in a way that the other platonic duos don't have. They go where the other goes -- (they always need to have the same job together), and other people already think they are a couple (based on heteronormativity but also because they're seen together so often). They obviously have no passion, because uh well, their physical attractions lie elsewhere.
Romantic
I couldn't think of anything that just fitted only intimacy and passion and no commitment, most of the couples on ST basically have commitment if they also have the other two.
Fatuous
Without intimacy, but only commitment and passion, this is a super rare kind of love, and probably not represented in Stranger Things. If anyone has any idea of what could be in this section, please let me know.
Consummate
The ideal love, with intimacy, passion and commitment, is luckily represented by most of the canon couples in Stranger Things. This is how you know that the writers are good at writing believable romances -- you don't need the characters to explicitly state that they are in love for you to know, because they have all three of the staples for an ideal love.
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Jancy has intimacy because they can tell each other secrets and they understand each other's emotional traumas (Jonathan understands Nancy's trauma surrounding Barb, for example. As a wise man once said, they have shared trauma). The biggest reason why they definitely have this love to me, though, is because the moments that they have the most trouble in their relationship is when one of these sections breaks down. AKA -- intimacy was broken down in S3 when they 'don't understand each other' anymore, and they were able to come back from this, showing their commitment. Season 4 also shows their commitment, because while Nancy was being sweet talked to by Steve (ugh sorry), she still stayed committed to Jonathan, same on Jonathan's side. Despite being in a different state, he still made all his decisions based on her future as well as his, showing they were committed.
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Jopper has intimacy because she feels that he understands her more than anyone -- he met her in high school and clearly have both shared memories and shared trauma. They trust each other with sensitive information about each other's lives, and are able to confide in each other when the other is going through something. The commitment is shown deeply in Season 4. Joyce's commitment is quite literally shown in almost crashing in a plane for him and trying to break him out of prison. Hopper's is the plan he makes to break out and go see her. Their passion well.... that is also shown in the way Hopper continues to pine for her in S3, giving her longing looks, but also in S4 because this desire has a pay off.
Okay so now we can talk about which categories Mileven and Byler fit into:
Mileven and Byler
Lets' start by looking at each of the three components:
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Mileven's Intimacy:  In the beginning of Season 1, Mike has emotional understanding with El, but this is gone by the time Season 4 rolls around. She explicitly states to him "No. You don't." He also finds no time to express his insecurities about his relationship with her actually with her, instead choosing to confide in Will about his insecurities. On El's side, she chooses to lie to Mike about having a really hard time in California, because she does not have the intimacy with him to feel like she can confide in him. There is a reason for this, obviously, and that is because she feels insecure about their relationship. But instead of communicating that, she chooses to ignore it. When Mike finally chooses to tell El about his 'feelings', even if they are true, he is only spurred on by Will alone, not by his own desire to do it. Whenever Mike tries to actually tell El what he's feeling, he ends up trying to do it in other ways in order to avoid it. Their scenes where they're about to open up to each other are either interrupted or extremely frustrating.
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Byler's Intimacy: Will has always chosen Mike to talk about his problems with. He says to him in the 'crazy together' scene that Mike can't tell the others because they won't understand, showing that they have a unique kind of intimacy. Will also chooses to confide only with Mike about his problem with D'art in S2, because the situation is slightly icky (because D'art was literally inside him ig) and trusts only Mike with this situation. This is the same as the situation at the end of S4, where Will knows it would be scary for anyone else to hear, but he's happy to tell Mike about Vecna being alive. Luckily, Mike is ready to jump into action at the drop of a hat in both situations. Mike's intimacy with Will is the sheer amount of heart-to-heart scenes they have in S4. He's always ready to tell Will about his relationship problems, but not El (and no, not just because she's in the lab). He's more comfortable around him than El. All Mike and El do is make out (in S3), have some slight banter, but they don't actually have any shared interests. Mike and Will both have the shared interest of all things nerdy, and Mike finds Will's artwork moving and amazing. Mike has been shown to have an appreciation for what Will creates.
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Mileven's Passion: I guess it's slightly awkward to talk about this kind of stuff with either Mileven or Byler, because they are teenagers. But teenagers obviously experience physical attraction and desire. The reason we can see this desire is because they have a lot of build up. Jancy have desire because they've been kept from each other because of Steve and Nancy being together. Jopper have been kept from each other because of Joyce's relationship with Bob and her grief, then Hopper being kept in jail (though that's not to do with romance). Lumax have been kept from one another because of Max refusing to get help from others. There was no pining, desiring moment with Mileven. And I know what people might say: Season 2 and Season 3 had moments where they were kept from each other and it was shown that Mike wanted her back. Oh? You mean the Mike that gave up on calling her and focused on Will until El reappeared again? You mean the Mike that joked around with Lucas after El broke up with him and played himself as the victim? It's not the same, because it has no pay off like the others. The maybe-pay off is the 'passion' of them making out in S3, constantly getting interrupted by some funny old guy haha!. As Hopper said, too much passion is 'not normal, not healthy'. This passion has Mike pulling her hands away from him and is just presented as humour/puberty-ridden teens figuring themselves out. Idk man
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Byler's Passion:  Ignoring the fact I feel so weird talking about this, let's just reiterate some of the points I brought up to you in the last paragraph. All other main couples in ST have had a moment of unambiguous pining. Jopper, Jancy and Lumax. This is also the case with Byler, clearly, from S4, Will's pining for Mike can be seen as him wanting something. Have you seen those longing looks, marked by sweet, pining music? Those scream attraction, even though some of you might be allergic to two teen boys showing attraction to each other but are totally fine with 13 year olds making out. Those are just Will's pining moments. I mean, I can talk at length about Mike's slip ups. The triple take? The amount of lip glances on this man? It's hard to say at the moment whether they have passion in this relationship, but the thing is. We don't need to have it right now. All we need to know is that there is potential for it, potential for an amazing pay off where Will confesses his feelings. And from the amount of pining Will's shown (and Mike in a lot of ways), there definitely is potential.
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Mileven's commitment: So this is where they actually have something. But that's not necessarily a good thing. Mike is the first person that treats El well after being stuck in an abusive lab for the first 12 years of her life. He made a promise to her that he would take care of her, and they both stress that Friends Don't Lie. They don't want to lose each other. Mike tells Will and El that he doesn't want to lose her and wants her to need him. This is not the same as romantically loving somebody. Mike's feelings shift during S2 and S4, but his commitment to El overrides everything. El wants to break up with him because of various reasons, and says that he is her 'first boyfriend' during S3. But they still stay together despite the troubles in their relationship, showing that the commitment is not something they want but something they need in order to feel secure. We have established they have no intimacy, we have established they have no passion. So why do they stay together? Because of the security, or some other reason. We have seen that Mike doesn't love El during S4 because he describes 'explaining himself' to her, while also not knowing what to say when she spells it out for him. We have seen how Mike treats El poorly, and the other way around. They lie to each other, they don't confide in the other. But they stay together because... they've made a promise, a commitment. Mike says I love you because she's going to die and believes it's what she wants. Even if this commitment was supposed to be genuine and pure, it can't be worth rooting for without intimacy and passion.
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Byler's commitment: Will states many times that he will always be Mike's friend, always need him, wants to be with him for the rest of his life, playing games in his basement. That is the most obvious sign of commitment I have ever seen. He is so committed that he is willing to sacrifice his own feelings in order to make Mike happy, effectively tying himself to his love forever. Mike is committed to Will in his own way. He is always the one to apologise and take the fall in their arguments, while with El he is not committed in that way. When Will is away from Mike, he's worried that he's lost him. Basically this means Mike is afraid that Will isn't as committed as he is to their friendship. It's funny because Will has the exact same worries during the Rink o Mania fight. But that's the irony. They are both committed. Mike's commitment despite the distance is shown through his fear of losing Will. Will's commitment to him despite the distance is through his painting. No matter what, Mike is always ready to be a team with Will and work with him. Even while they were supposed to be fighting, Mike confides in Will. And Will? A huge part of Will's arc is his undying commitment towards Mike, which makes his scenes with Mileven so upsetting -- because we know his love will never end, meaning his sadness won't end unless Mileven break up.
So what's the diagnosis?
Mileven: Empty Love (Only commitment to each other. There is no show of emotional understanding and connection. The passion and pining for each other is not shown like with other ST couples.)
Byler: Consummate Love (Has all three elements. Both have a mutual understanding to each other's needs, both have a mutual pining, even though it's much easier to see on Will's side. Both have a commitment to the other in their own way. All other popular ST couples have this love and would fit in with Byler's)
Im so scared to post this because it's so different from my other posts. But hopefully you see that even if Byler is not endgame, Mileven being endgame would not be a true show of 'love defeats all' -- because it is not a healthy love. 
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trulyradicalactivist · 2 days ago
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Love Is Never Wrong.
Imagine being told that something as natural as your own heartbeat is wrong. Imagine waking up every morning, knowing that simply feeling love could make you a target for violence and hatred. That it could put your life, your job, your relationships, and your health at risk. For millions of people around the world, maybe even more than that, this is not just a nightmare, it is their reality. It is what they deal with daily. They are hated and punished simply because of who they're attracted to. They are treated as if love were a crime instead of a fundamental part of human existence. But love is not a crime. And no one, absolutely no one, deserves to be hated or persecuted for something as natural as their attraction. This applies not only to those who are gay, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, or so forth. It also applies to paraphiles. It applies to anyone and everyone with an attraction seen as abnormal by the society we live in. A society that forces normality down our throats and insists that we cannot and will not love who we love.
Love is one of the most powerful and universal human experiences. Not just romantic love or sexual love either. Platonic love, familial love, love between partners, unlabeled love of all kinds. It brings people together, it gives many people a purpose or a reason to continue when that big fight they fight begins to wear down, and fills our hearts with joy and warmth. Love, in all its forms, has been celebrated in poetry, music, and art for centuries because it is one of the most beautiful things about being alive. So why is it that some people are told their love is wrong? Why are some forced to hide, to fear, to suffer simply because their heart leads them in a direction others don’t understand?
Love, whether a choice or something given the day you were born, whether you have very little or so much it spills from your soul, whether it is romantic or it is platonic or anything between, is as natural as the color of your eyes or the sound of your laughter. To hate someone for their attraction is to hate them for something that is simply a part of who they are. How can that ever be justified? How can you justify hatred of that extreme?
The reality of this form of persecution is heartbreaking. Families turn their backs on their own children. Friends become strangers. People are denied opportunities, stripped of their rights, and, in the worst cases, harmed or even killed, just because of who they love.
The emotional toll of this hatred is devastating. Imagine a child growing up with the weight of secrecy crushing them, terrified of being honest about who they are because they fear rejection or violence. Thinking that what they are growing into, queer or para, will make them a monster. Imagine someone longing to hold the hand of the person they love in public, but instead, they lower their eyes and keep their distance, afraid of the stares, the whispers, or worse. Maybe that person is of the same gender or sex as them, maybe that person is of their same blood.
This is not just unfair. It is cruel. It is unjustifiable. It is bigoted.
Hatred, discrimination, and violence leave scars, both visible and invisible. They push people into loneliness, depression, and despair. They rob people of the right to love freely, to be themselves without fear, to speak their truth in a way they feel comfortable and safe doing so. No one deserves to carry that pain simply because of who they are attracted to. The world does not need more hate. It does not need more judgment, more rejection, or more suffering. What the world needs is more love. More compassion. More understanding.
If we want to live in a kinder, more just world, we must reject the idea that anyone’s love is worth less than another’s. We must reject the thought that a love could be taboo or unnatural. We must open our hearts and stand against hatred in all its forms. Because in the end, the only thing that should matter about love is that it is real. That it is honest. That it is freely given.
And that it is never, ever something to be ashamed of.
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pyromiz · 1 year ago
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When two characters who don't have a happy ending because one (or both) of them die, gets fanart and fanfic of them growing old together.
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edwinisms · 7 months ago
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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it#cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible#I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder#because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and#open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running#but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship#if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here#I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him#as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew#each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he#did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel#he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early#whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the#tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to#want to be with him and protect him and so on#but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think#but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is#down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as#he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him#to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc#that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a#fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul#idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super#strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH#payneland#dead boy detectives#rambling#polls
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yurishica · 2 months ago
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Wolf and Diane headcanon from me.
I hc that in Diane's criminal years, her personality was similar to Wolf's in the start of the first movie. She kind of sees her past self in him.
Actually I'm not sure if Diane really was a part of The Bad Girls in her criminal years, because in the first movie when she talks about it, she doesn't mention having allies (nobody knew her real identity + it's possible that the bad girls band didn't exist back then). Though, maybe Diane just didn't want to talk about it back in the first movie. If she had her criminal band, Diane could relate to Wolf even more, because she knows how it feels when you leave your friends behind and probably she didn't want him to go through it.
Also I hc that Diane is a little older than Wolf. If he's is 31 y.o., she's probably around 35. I need more male and female couples/duos where woman is the older one tbh.
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mostlyinconvenient · 10 months ago
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I've met a lot of people who are lonely and want friends and when I open up to them, they instantly get way too much for me. I need slower friendships and it feels terrible to say in a world where so many people are lonely, but if I feel like they're placing too much of their social and emotional health too heavily onto me I will not be able to be their friend. I am not a savior or a mom, and I can't have relationships that continously drain me without anything in return
My ideal idea for friends and partners is another human who is just as full without me as they are with me. I can be supportive and encouraging and I would be a shoulder to cry on if I knew them long enough, but I don't want to be somebody's second mother. I want relationships in my life that enrich something that is already full, because no one person should be your entire life. I would not want to have that weight on my shoulders or put it on another
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nunyverse-scribe · 1 year ago
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What if I said you don’t need to be physically affectionate with your partner. What if I said you don’t have to ever kiss them on the lips. Or hold their hands. Or cuddle. What if I said that expecting physical touch out of a partner without talking about those things first is weird, because you shouldn’t expect those to be default givens to you. The same way you wouldn’t expect (or I’d hope you wouldn’t expect) those to be default givens in a friendship.
Sure, a lotta people may be fine with physical affection with their romantic partner, but have you ever considered that not everyone does. Would you assume that someone’s romantic relationship is “probably doing poorly” if you learned they don’t engage in physical affection like that. Would you pity the person who respects the boundaries of their partner that feels uncomfortable with physical touch. Would you villainize the person who set that boundary.
#I was pondering about the fact that lip kisses are dubbed as strictly romantic#& I already made a post abt how I think that’s ridiculous and how some ppl may express platonic affection through lip kisses#& I was thinking about how this personally applies to me and like#I realized that……. I don’t need lip kisses at all??????#if I never kiss a romantic partner while in a relationship that wouldn’t bother me#it also wouldn’t bother me if they DID want lip kisses#same applies to friendships#I wouldn’t be bothered if a friend said they like expressing platonic love through lip kisses#& I’m obviously not bothered if they don’t want that#idk I’m finding that a lotta rules for romance & platonic love is very arbitrary and ridiculous#mainly been thinking abt this bc I’ve been remembering this one TikTok of two girls showing a montage of photos of their friendship#& in one of the photos they were kissing each other on the lips#& they clarified that they were doing it in a platonic way#however ppl made a meme abt it & would draw their character ships to it#and I remember that leaving a sour taste in my mouth bc like… bro why are you implying that lip kissing can only be romantic????#I have so many thoughts abt this stuff tho#I think I might make one of my OC ships have a thing where they’re like… NOT super physically affectionate#bc one of the characters HATES physical touch#idk it’s just been on my mind a lot these past couple days#& unfortunately who I’d go to for bc fellow aro-specs be camping rn so no texting#anyway rambling in the post AND in the tags#relationship anarchist#relationship anarchy
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fullscoreshenanigans · 6 months ago
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Tbf canon did forcibly remove Norman and Emma from the trio for roughly two years </3 Not to detract from the point you're making though.
Also feel like @thedoodlenoodlesuniverse's trio dynamics graph is still fairly accurate (original deleted, reblog here)
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Eternally grateful I've never come across jealous/spiteful Norman and Ray fighting over Emma, or jealous/spiteful Emma and Ray fighting over Norman.
(although I do subscribe to the headcanon of Norman having a pang of jealousy over how much time RE got to spend together before their reunion in the Paradise Hideout with how he tends to navigate extremes at that age, but it’s of a very specific variety. Seeing how close the Grace Field escapees have become during their near two years out in demon world and how that shared trauma brought them together could be a mixed bag for him, with the aching reminder that he wasn’t there with them, didn’t share those memories with them after a lifetime of being together, and the initial flare of jealously turns into shame over thinking it in the first place when 1) he’s mad at not being able to have been there with them‚ not at them, 2) how selfish it is to still want that when they already went through his death once and now will have to go through that a second time, and 3) he spent so long isolated and effectively helpless in his immediate circumstances while at Lambda and suffered for no justifiable reason that it manifests in a festering internal rage, which heartbreakingly can never be given a satisfactory answer…so basically banana_slug_army’s Interwoven lol)
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full score trio 😔
#yea…idk it just doesn't feel right with just two of em#like i love trios sm#this also applies to shipping#everytime i see people shipping 2 of em im just like. but what about the 3rd :(#the 3rd one ether need slike. a REALLY good alternative#or ot3 baybeeee#← OT3 is what one does if they are not a coward 🙏😌#/lh but also I've been burned too many times with a few series#semi-canon cishet m/f with pair-the-spares complementary m/f ships are a helluva drug#idk if you wanted this to be a tangent discussion post my bad#TPN Memes#Full Score Trio#Norrayemma#Shipping#thedoodlenoodlesuniverse#ctrl58#TPN Fanfic#banana_slug_army#𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑤𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑛#all the trio ship factions cut the third member out to some degree#but NE is the largest one and thus the most noticeable instance of it with Ray being cut out#I love Ray using the “you've loved her since we were kids” argument in that chart#as if they aren't still 11-13yo children dklsjf#this is also why I think you can argue all relationships are platonic bc like. they really are so young and feelings change over lifetimes#even if I am heavily biased toward my preferred ships in the long run/endgame lol#and with the emotional maturity they display well beyond their young years I get why people fall hard for these dynamics#re: jealousy people can write w/e they're feeling but it just seems so at odds with their characters#and also likely to be written in a cartoony way that I have little interest in#/déjà vu posting
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nmakii · 11 months ago
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GETTING CAUGHT IN THE MOMENT… LIPSTICK ON YOUR FACE
— alastor + lucifer + vox getting caught with lipstick stains all over them…
— generally gn!reader. guys can wear lipstick too smh
hehe i got a new lip tint (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵) maybe alastor’s part is a little self-projected
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— alastor
alastor himself isn’t one for physical affection. in fact, the thought itself makes him feel dirty. someone else’s skin against his… eugh…
though, when it came to you, he couldn’t keep his hands to himself; hands clawing and playing with your hair, wrapping his arms around your neck, pinching your cute cheeks, holding your hand… it’s almost as if he’d double-die without you near!
and the only thing he’d enjoy more than that would be having his affection reciprocated; interlocking your arm with his, a surprise hug from behind, a kiss on the cheek, they are all more than appreciated! especially the thing about kissing…
a kiss from you is simply just exhilarating. the suddenness yet sweetness of it, it’s truly the purest form of love, regardless of if it’s familial, romantic, or platonic— it’s the purest expression of your love for another person.
so, just imagine alastor’s reaction to your new lipstick, strawberry red to give your lips a glossy color, yet still light enough to appear natural. the pretty hue of red complimenting your face features perfectly by giving it the color it needs as to not appear pale.
absolutely gorgeous. so confusing how a simple amount of color could make you look as if you were an angel from heaven itself. you quite literally took his breath away from just applying a new lipstick…
at some point, alastor had reached some sort of limit when he finally caved into his inner desires, bringing you to a secluded place in the hotel, his hands moving to your hips and hair.
he couldn’t wait any longer to place his lips on your’s, your lipstick smearing all over his thin lips. kissing him from his cheeks to his jawline, leaving light pink stains all over his skin.
he groaned at the feeling of wet lipstick all over his face, and at the same time reveled in the ways you are telling everyone that the only one who could see the radio demon in such a needy and doe-like state would be you; he’d be yours to fool around with, and yours to do however you’d see fit. just as you are his— no one else’s. the smeared lipstick on the side of your lips should send that as a statement enough to whatever lowlife hooligan would even attempt to sweep you off your feet.
when the two of you had returned, it was a strange sight to say the least… alastor’s face and jaw covered with pink lips, and you with your lipstick smudged and smeared off your lips, instead all over you neck.
“well, uh… you two look like ‘ya had lot’sa fun…” angel said monotonously, awkwardly trying to keep up conversation. “ohh, most certainly!” alastor grinned, his transatlantic accent popping through the radio static.
he knows he could’ve wiped it off… he has a handkerchief in his back pocket, he could’ve easily saved himself that awkward conversation.
but, he didn’t.
could you blame him? he wants all of hell to know that both you and him off-limits for good.
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— lucifer
when many imagine the king of hell, it’s hard to think he’d be a social piranha. the same case had gone for you.
who knew lucifer was still as pure of heart as he was during his time in heaven? and who knew he’d fall for someone so easily after the sudden disappearance of his wife?
when he saw you, it was practically love at first sight! your big eyes, your shiny hair, and those big pretty lips of yours that he just wanted to kiss so badly…
he listened carefully as charlie introduced you to him, trying to remember every detail about you and every feature on your face, stuttering over his words once it was time to speak for himself.
and somehow, despite his meekness towards you and your awkwardness whenever he was around, you two ended up in a relationship— with the help of vaggie and charlie’s meddling in pushing you two together.
the two of you loved each other, of course… but it was always hard to express. the only way lucifer knew how to show his love was through his presence and gifts. he wasn’t hell’s greatest kisser, but he tries.
and, today— it was your 5 month anniversary… quite a long time, the hotel’s been good so far, no major threats other than one of cherri bomb’s occasional explosions. and because of how long it’s been, you decided to do something a little special… put on some relatively expensive clothes and make-up your face a little bit.
when lucifer saw you all dolled up, he was honestly a little stunned. lips as red as an apple, hair as soft as silk, the words were stuck in his mouth. “w- er- wow..! i’m not dressed up or anything— agh, this is awkward..” lucifer muttered. “hey, it’s ok… this was a surprise for you, y’know?” you said, comforting him slightly.
“you look… stunning today” he smiled, carefully putting down his anniversary present for you on his work desk, still wrapped in a red ribbon. he made his way to you, hands making their way to your cheeks to softly cup them as he gently leaned into you for a kiss.
he released a breath he didn’t know he had been holding as you kissed his face all over, as if healing the wounds of his past with his present. his banishment into hell, lilith’s abandonment, they all didn’t matter anymore, you are the present and the future.
he wrapped his arms around your waist in a hug as he kissed your forehead, the residual lipstick from his lips smeared onto you.
lucifer laughed awkwardly before using his finger to carefully rub off the pink stains on your forehead. “haha… c’mon, i got a dinner reservation in the lust ring tonight…” he laughed, interlocking his arm with yours.
“don’t you wanna take off that lipstick on your face first?” you raised an eyebrow at him. “i mean… i dont minddd… so, it’s only if you wanna take if off” his eyes wandered, his cheeks growing flustered “hmm… nah. i want everyone to know you belong to me now.” you grinned mischievously.
and when the two of you walked out of the hotel lobby, charlie went to wish you a safe trip and happy anniversary before she noticed the stains on her dad’s face. “err… dad..? you gotta a little something there…” charlie muttered as she pointed all over his face. “ah..? yeah, i know” he laughed it off, proudly showing off to hell how hopelessly devoted he is to you.
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— vox
vox was a busy man. from having many public appearances, to coming up with new ideas for voxtek, to putting out valentino’s temper tantrums, he barely had the time for romance.
barely. he loved you, truly. he keeps you dear to his heart, no matter how busy he’d be, vox would still make time for you late at night.
everyone had known you, why wouldn’t they? you’re the partner of one of the most influential overlords in hell, that’s a feat that is amazing to accomplish, dating vox in itself has made you into a sort of local celebrity; causing you to be invited to many galas, parties, and occasional raves.
and tonight happened to be the night of one of those parties. zestial had invited you to a formal dinner party, an all star guest list filled by many of the goetic princes, various overlords in hell, and other local hellborns such as verosika mayday.
“please, voxxx? just this once, it’s only like 3 hours!” you grumble as your apply a coat of ruby red over your lips, checking your appearance in the bathroom mirror. “i can’t.. i have a 5:00 with val and velvette, then after that, a board meeting about new gadgets to release…” vox groaned, already pissed about the day ahead.
“fine then, your loss.” you pouted, rolling your eyes as you left the bathroom and into the bedroom. “holy shit…” vox sighed out. “you look… really good, my love.” he walked over to you, his hands moving to your body, outlining the clothes’ stitching as he recognized it to be the one he had custom-made for you.
your hands rested on vox’s shoulders, forcibly making him lean over a bit before leaving various kiss stains all over his screen.
vox visibly tensed as his screen started glowing a bright teal, showing his clear embarrassment as pink smudges fogged his screen.
his breath heaved as his hands moved all around your body, desperate to find some kind of relief to his pent-up stress.
ending your kiss attack all too soon on his lips, you pulled away, your lips slightly pale now as you grinned at him. “spend the day looking like that and i’ll give you more after work” you winked, taking your belongings and leaving out the door, leaving a flustered vox in your bedroom, covered with lipstick stains.
“vox… the fuck is going on with your face?” velvette snarled. “it looks as if you got fucking mauled by a bear pretending to be a woman.” she yelled, her british accent making her trip over some consonants.
vox sighed, hearing valentino mutter some sort of dirty comparison of vox to a prostitute. “instead of focusing on me, why don’t you put your efforts into our agenda today?” vox frowned, his tone clearly saying that he’s holding himself back from releasing a flood of curses onto the two…
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tanaor · 1 year ago
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Want quick tips to add instant chemistry to the relationships of your characters??
(🥳With examples🥳)
First of all, I want to say that you can also use most of them for platonic/ non-romantic relationships, so feel free to use this tips however you think they might work better in your story. So, without further adue, let's get to the tips!!!
Make your characters LISTEN to each other. Like, if A tells B they're not a morning person, B could make some coffee for A or lower the volume of their alarm.
This might sound quite obvious, but show that you characters care for each other. It might be as simple as one of them giving the other a glass of water when they feel a little dizzy, but it works wonders!
Make your characters physically close. When you are emotionally close to someone, you tend to be physically close too. But here is the thing. Make your characters react like it's second nature: "how would I not hug B when I haven't seen them in days?" or "Of course I'm gonna take A's hand when I feel afraid".
They don't have to be constantly thinking about each other, but when they do, MAKE IT MATTER!! For example, character A is out shopping, and they see B's favorite cookies. B didn't have a good day, and A knows that. But A also knows B is gonna fucking love the cookies, so they buy some.
Let them believe and trust each other. Also applies if one of them is a little distrustful: let your characters rely on one another, even if at the start they aren't as comfortable doing it. For a distrustful character, letting the other one help with chores might be a HUGE thing.
Other tips for writers: previous | next
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ghouldump · 7 months ago
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more loustat x chill/unbothered/oblivious fem reader PLEASE!!
maybe she's like been a part of their relationship for a while, and she like the fledgling of some other vampire, her and her maker were like chill and totally platonic he dipped at some point before she met loustat, and she like the sane one between them and unfortunately gets ignored/left out unfortunately
something like the scene from season 1 where Louis swims across the Mississippi river to get to Lestat, and like reader is there too cause she went w Louis and loustat being there dramatic selves while she's just like trying to talk it out like adults, and then it spirals into argument about her wanting to visit her maker because Lestat, and tbh Louis too, is petty like that
Also your iwtv fics are my life line omg!!🎀
L'amour De Ma Vie | Lestat x Reader x Louis
ෆ while you love your companions, it is no secret that they oftentimes exclude you, and it isn't until you leave that they go into panic mode.
I love this idea, I hope you don't mind me changing it a little bit 🩷
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“Louis, Y/n, you’re both soaking wet,” Lestat sat up from the bed.
Glancing at Louis, you could tell he was seconds away from slapping the smirk from Lestat’s face. The woman, Antoinette, wrapped one of the many sheets around her body, awkwardly staring at the two of you.
“Leave,” he told her, and just like that, she was up, running out of the bedroom.
“What are you two doing here?”
“Looking for you, and we…found you,” you answered. Louis remained silent, staring at Lestat, his mind all over the place from his companion's betrayal.
You understood where he was coming from, but at the same time, you didn't. Your maker, Lucius, lives a polyamorous lifestyle. From the moment he turned you, becoming his daughter, you saw the plethora of women and men come and go. Eternity was too long for him to stay with one person, he'd jokingly say, leaving a trail of broken hearts.
“You put your lover on the song, and expect us to come running back to you,” Louis screamed at him.
“I wanted a clear voice, to get the-
“I don’t give a fuck,” Louis interrupted.
“Louis, we agreed that we would just talk it out,” you told him, watching as he was fuming, but he ignored your words.
“You two swam to Mississippi to find me,” Lestat kept the same expression, eyeing the both of you lustfully.
“I swim faster than I drive,” Louis said, his fangs coming out.
“We don’t have to fight like this, we can find a middle ground-
“No, why are you acting unbothered by him stepping out on both of us?” Louis asked.
“I’m not, polyamory isn’t a deal breaker for me, so I feel like-
“He cheated Y/n, whatever bullshit you were exposed to by your maker, doesn’t apply in this relationship,” he told you, catching you off guard.
“That isn’t what I’m saying, we came here because of the song but also because we’ve agreed to make things work”
“So why are you acting like you’re on his side?”
“Louis, what are you talking about? Just because I’m not as angry as you, doesn’t mean I am against you, Lucius has always said anger is-
“Do you always have to bring him up?” Lestat asked a slight frown in place.
“Lucius, Lucius, Lucius, are you with us, or Lucius?” He raised his voice. Furrowing your eyebrows, you were extremely confused, about how the conversation went from Lestat’s infidelity to your relationship with your maker.
“I’m beginning to question the same thing,” you said, backing away.
“Y/n, I’m sorry,” Louis shook his head, mentally criticizing himself for his choice of words.
“It’s okay,” you smiled at him, before leaving, due to your small age difference in your makers, you were faster than Louis, going back home.
You hated this feeling, this emotion, how your mind made you think of things that never bothered you too much before, but now did. From the moment you joined their companionship, you were constantly unintentionally excluded. Even in public, you cringed at times you were assumed to be nothing more than a friend of the two.
Entering the home you had grown to love, you went upstairs, packing some clothing in a bag. You were thankful that Claudia was out hunting, knowing your departure wouldn’t be so smooth if she’d been home. Leaving the bedroom, the family portrait caught your eye, making you pout.
Claudia sat on the sofa, while you, stood next to Louis and Lestat, who leaned against the sofa. You had been hesitant to take the photos, but they all insisted. As the photographer went to snap the photo, Lestat glanced at you.
“Come closer,” he said, pulling you between him and Louis.
His hand on your waist, while Louis held your hand, you all looked like a happy family.
Wiping the tear from your eye, you thought of how despite the occasional exclusion, they did so much more that made you overlook the habit. Maybe you could just get away for a little while, before coming back home.
Glamouring your way from state to state, for well over 24 hours, before you arrived in Los Angeles. Lucius fit into the bright city where stars and beauty resided. As you drained the shipment driver, you felt your blood pumping, an adrenaline rush of excitement coursing through your veins. Lifting from the man, you looked around, sensing the familiar presence near.
“I knew it was you I was sensing,” you heard, smiling brightly, you climbed out of the truck, running into Lucius' arms. His expensive scent filled your nose, as you wiped your mouth.
“What are you wearing, my love, is this what they wear down in New Orleans?” he asked, staring at your outfit. Beige trousers, along with a light pink blouse, he shook his head in disapproval. He considered himself to have impeccable taste in clothing, but he also was old-fashioned in some ways.
“I couldn't have traveled practically in a dress,” you said.
“I am more than glad that you are here, but why so sudden? I mean, no letter or postcard”
“I just wanted to get away from home for a while”
“Those two aren't treating you right? They are easily replaceable, what have I always told you, an eternity is-
“too long to be stuck with the same person, and I should always explore my taste, I know, and Louis and Lestat are fine, I just wanted to get away, I was hoping I could stay with you, for some time, if that's alright”
“Of course, you are always welcome,” he said, walking you to his car.
He didn't live too far away, in an expensive neighborhood, his villa home, the most extravagant. Stepping out, you immediately noticed the woman, peaking from the window.
“You have company?”
“Yes, Sonya, she wants to be an actor”
“You said that weirdly, is she special, maybe a potential companion?” you asked him, grinning.
“She has very sweet blood and an equally cute face, so I keep her around”
“You were just talking about me being with the same people-
“My love, this is different, she has grown on me, yes, but I think we both know I’ll eventually crave something new,” he smirked, as he wrapped his arm around you, leading you into the house.
“Shameless,” you laughed.
“It's true, and the best part of all, when the sex is wonderful they always come running back, come on, I have an extra coffin, you can sleep in”
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“I went all the way to Metairie, and nothing, what about you?” Louis announced, walking back into the house. Pacing the floor, while Lestat sat at the piano, staring off into space.
“Why is he back here, I thought we weren’t talking to him right now? And where’s Y/n?” Claudia asked.
“Not now Clau-
“She’s gone, she took some clothes and left,” Lestat finally spoke.
“She can’t be too far, we can still find her and-
“I’ve been all over Mississippi, searching, nothing, not a trace, I can’t think of where she could be and I’m not her m-” Stopping in his speech, he put his head down, clenching his jaw. His leg shook lightly, trying to contain his anger.
“What is it?” Louis asked as he and Claudia stared confusedly at him.
“She’s with her maker,” he managed to get out.
His eyes reddened as he grew angrier, Lestat couldn’t help that he was inherently jealous, unrighteously possessive, especially towards those he loved, and that was very few. You were the most relaxed, forgiving vampire he'd ever met. Extremely oblivious and doting, you'd brag to whoever would listen about how great he was.
While he and Louis held all of the attention, he could hear you bragging to some mortal how well-dressed Louis was, or how Lestat was the greatest musician to grace your ears. You would go on and on, stroking their egos, willingly accepting and loving their baggage Claudia, you were a precious gem, adored by them both.
Your personality was much calmer than theirs, while they regularly clashed, you'd be bringing up calming methods, or ignoring them, chatting with Claudia.
“You have the power over your anger, Lucius was once a cruel angry vampire until he realized it was pointless, if the situation can be fixed, then do it, but if not, leave it in the past,” you'd quote.
Lucius, Lestat hated the man greatly, despite never coming across him before. Suppose his hate began from the respect you held for the man. He was around the same age as Lestat, from Italy, and was very handsome, he'd heard you say before.
He wished he could undo time so that he could become your maker. His blood in your veins, your heart in sync with his own, his fully, bound by more than your vow of companionship. While Louis only hated the man for the weird lifestyle habits he passed along to you, Lestat loathed the idea of another being nearly as perfect as he was to you.
“Lucius speaks French too, although he's more fluent in Italian”
“Lucius is also into fashion, he used to dress me all the time”
“Lucius was once a part of an opera, but he ended up causing a bit of drama because he slept with nearly everyone who worked there”
“Lucius…”
“Lucius…”
Lestat sat frozen seething at the thought of the man. He wanted nothing more than to kill him for making his way into your heart, he couldn't care less about the kind of relationship you'd shared with him.
“Uncle Les,” Claudia called out, exchanging a look with Louis.
“We can still get her to come home, he has sent her mail before,” looking around, he sent to the pile of mail, looking through and seeing the ripped-open envelope.
“Los Angeles, she's in Los Angeles, we can find her,” Louis approached Lestat, showing him the mail.
“She's gone, she's gone back to him and left us,” Lestat mumbled to himself, already crying.
“Hey, we’re gonna find her and she'll hear out, she’ll come back home,” Louis told Lestat, also trying to convince himself, as tears dropped from his eyes.
“I’m going to bed,” Lestat sulked.
“So you can cry all night? Do you want Y/n to come back or not, I sure as hell got used to some peace around here, we have the address, we can easily find a way out there, stop being so dramatic,” Claudia screamed at him.
“I preferred her quiet,” he said, sniffling.
“We can get her back home, you know how she is, she'll want to talk it out before we're back on the road”
“The insufferable therapy sessions,” he chimed in, as he wiped his eyes.
“Exactly, we can start planning right now,” Louis said, his companion nodded in agreement.
“How much do I need to pack?” Claudia asked.
“What makes you think you could come?” Lestat asked her, crossing his legs.
“Because I care about Y/n too”
“We won't be gone for long Claudia, we're just trying to get her to come back home,” Louis said to her, watching as she stepped away.
“If Y/n was here, she would not be okay with you just leaving me here,” she said, stomping upstairs.
“Where should we start?”
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“Why don’t you turn Sonya? It’s so obvious that you care about her?” You asked Lucius as you danced to the classical record, in the considerably large living room. Wearing the custom gown he'd gifted you, both of your mouths were covered in blood from the guest of the orgy he'd hosted.
It had been nearly a week of spending time with him, and you were enjoying every moment of the easygoing, carefree life.
“None of this music is as good as it once was, going to see Paganini, I had never heard an instrument played so beautifully,” he shook his head, ignoring your question.
“Lucius,” you called his name knowingly, forcing him to look at you.
“I can't turn her, I…I love her,” he admitted, dipping you.
“If you love her, you'd turn her, and you both can have eternity together,” you told him, but he smiled, his hand brushing against your cheek.
“If I love her, then I'll let her live, have children of her own, and pass on as a pretty little elderly woman,” he said.
“Very noble of you,” you joked.
“I guess, but I’ll hold on until that time comes, I have another two years, and she’ll be twenty-seven”
“Aw, Lucius, are you sure you don't want me to do it?” you asked, as he continued to dance.
“Love looks different for everyone, my love, you, of all people, understand that,” he chuckled.
“I guess you're right”
“I suppose that is why your lovers are about to burst into my home,” he said with a smile, as he held you close.
“Yeah, probably, wait, wh-
Just then, the front door burst open, Lestat and Louis storming it, although, they had different targets, rushing over. Louis stood in front of you, pulling you away, into his arms, already pleading that you forgive him for how he spoke and his recent habit of exclusion.
While Lestat instantly had Lucius against the wall, his hand to his throat. Your maker only laughed, you truly learned well, both of these men wrapped completely around your finger, and you didn't even realize it.
“Lestat, don't,” you told him, hearing his chaotic thoughts, he wanted Lucius dead.
“You leave without a word, in the middle of the night. Countless arguments, and the moment he comes up, you up and leave me, leave us,” he screamed.
“We can talk about it, but I need you to let him go, I don't want to see you two fighting, so please, just release him,” you said, exhaling a breath of air, as he let go, growling at Lucius, who nonchalantly walked to you.
“You've done so well, my love, they're like your two little dogs,” he laughed, turning off the music.
“Lucius,” you warned lightly, as he pulled you close to whisper into your ear.
“I’ll give you a bit of privacy, I presume you won't be here when am back, I want you to reach out more often, it has been fun since you've been back home”
“I will,” you nodded.
“Wonderful, I love you”
“I love you too,” you said, watching as he went outside, flying into the air in an instant.
“What are you two doing here?” you asked them, wiping your mouth.
“What are we doing here? Did you forget that you have companions, or did you not care?” Lestat asked angrily.
“You up and left, you didn't even leave a note,” Louis said.
“Did you not care when you were in Mississippi, did you care when you brought up upbringing as if it was an insult?” the words shut them up, the guilt evident, in their eyes.
“Do you love him more, you went back to your maker because you want him more, we haven't been enough for you,” Lestat spoke.
“I'm sorry for what I said to you, I was angry and I misdirected my anger and I didn't mean to do that, especially to you,” Louis apologized.
“Apologizing is pointless, you love him more than any of us, I just need to hear you say it, perhaps that will give me the closure I need, say Lestat, I never loved you-
Bursting out laughing, you covered your mouth, waving your hand apologetically at the two.
“I'm sorry, but you two are drama queens,” you laughed.
“What are you talking about?”
“I didn't even take all of my clothes, or my coffin if I was leaving, I would be taking that because it’s custom,” you told them.
“Why didn't you say that in a letter?” Louis asked you.
“Because I thought about leaving for good, but then I considered how much I love you both, yes, I am oftentimes left out, but when I'm not, I feel like I'm on top of the world, and as you said, we have gotten into countless of arguments, why would I just because you brought up Lucius?”
“You're always bringing him up, comparing-
“I’m not comparing the two of you, you have a few things in common, it has only been a handful of times, but you only like the attention on you, you get so jealous at the thought of me talking about another man,” you laughed.
“Don't be ridiculous, and he's not nearly as good-looking as me,” he said.
“See, I never compared your looks, I know who looks better, Lucius doesn't come close”
“You too, Louis, jealous, worried that I wouldn't think that our relationship is enough and I’d go back to Lucius to practice his lifestyle, it's cute really, you both came scrambling out here, to win me back, I am touched and a few other things,” you continued as they approached you.
Immediately, Lestat was kissing your lips, holding you close, scared to let you slip away. Pushing away from him, you pulled Louis near, slipping your tongue into his mouth. Lestat stood behind you, kissing your neck, and tearing the dress.
“Where’s Claudia?” you asked through your moans, as each article of clothing was peeled away. Stopping, the two slowly stared at each other, before looking at you.
“She’s in New Orleans”
“You left her in New Orleans, by herself? We need to leave now, why would you do that?” you yelled, going to pack your things.
“Wait, can we finish what we started?” Louis asked his hand over the painfully stiff sensation between his legs.
“No, we need to get back to her”
“I hate when the brat is right”
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pureastrologywisdom · 2 months ago
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𝔖𝔶𝔫𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔶 𝔒𝔟𝔰𝔢𝔯𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰
Today I want to talk about synastry that creates a warmth and sweetness around a connection, whether it be friendship or more. Most of these are aspects that I consider to be a good builder for a longer term relationship. Like I said these could be platonic, but these are also wonderful in romantic connections.
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Venus conjunct Sun ~ trine/sextile to a slightly lesser affect
When two peoples Venus and Sun come together in a chart it shows that they inspire each other. They encourage each others creative sides. I will also say the Venus person can become somewhat of a muse for the Sun person in this connection, it can be the other way around but I have seen that slightly less. Venus is beauty and creativity, and the sun is expression. The sun person wishes to capture and express the Venus persons beauty/essence. This adds a sense of harmony to the relationship. They often have somewhat similar tastes also.
Venus in their 4th House
This is an incredibly comforting placement to have. The fourth house is one of the more private parts of a persons chart. It represents how they retreat back into themselves and their privacy. Having a benefic planet like Venus come into this house creates a beautiful connection. You want your private life to be harmonious. This person will feel at home with you, they are so comfortable around you, your presence feels so peaceful. The Venus person enjoys how the house person feels at ease around them.
Mars conjunct Mercury
These are two people who push each other. There is a lot of energy around this connection, this is a placement where two people will encourage each other to improve and work on their goals/ideas. Think of it as Mercury is the thinker who can give the Mars person a hand with the refinement of ideas, whereas the Mars person helps encourage the Mercury person to executer their ideas and put their plans into action. This s also a placement where two people have a good amount of respect for one another. Debates can be something that comes up, but in a more practical way where they are genuinely interested in one another's point of view.
Moon conjunct Sun - also applies to a lesser extent with a Trine/Sextile
There is this natural exchange between you, an understanding. What one is on the inside the other displays so effortlessly. There is a gentleness and warmth around this connection. This is truly an aspect of being seen. I especially love to see this between a man and woman, where it's the woman's Moon and The Man's Sun.
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Thank you for reading,
Pure astro wisdom x
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erosastro · 10 months ago
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🌷Composite risings🌷
Let’s talk about how each couple presents themselves for each rising sign in their composite chart.
*Disclaimer: These are my opinions, you don’t have to agree with them. And I’m aware not everyone agrees with the degree theory but I’ve personally seen a difference from degrees, so again, just my opinion and interpretation.
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🌷Aries Rising (could also apply to Aries degrees 1°, 13° and 25°) - This couple is affectionate with each other. They’re passionate and can be competitive with one another, though if on the same team, they’re a force to be reckoned with. They probably enjoy recreational activities with each other. The couple that goes to the gym together, plays sports together, jump out of a plane together lol. They’re both young at heart with each other, even if they identify as old souls individually. They motivate each other to do better and step out of their comfort zones.
🌷Taurus Rising(could also apply to Taurus degrees 2°, 14° and 26°) - They’re so soft with each other and this relationship is filled with tenderness. They can be possessive of one another too(similar to Leo rising couples). They can tune out the world and just soak each other up. They can also be touchy feely with each other, the degree might also have impact here but if it does it won’t be to a great extent.
🌷Gemini Rising (could also apply to Gemini degrees 3°, 15° and 27°) - This is a couple that never runs out of things to talk about. Their favourite part of the day is getting to talk to one another. They inspire the other person. They could have a lot in common and share the same visions/goals. They can also be in their own bubble sometimes, especially if they get really into a topic or discussion and they tend to tease each other, very playful. This is the couple that can prank one another lol.
🌷Cancer Rising (could also apply to Cancer degrees 4°, 16° and 28°) - They have a soft spot for each other. There’s something about the other person that instantly makes them feel comfortable. They’re ones most likely to share nose nudges and butterfly kisses in public. So much PDA but at the same time they can keep a lot of their relationship private. There’s a good balance, in my opinion. They can be very affected by the other person’s mood too.
🌷Leo Rising (could also apply to Leo degrees 5°, 17° and 29°) - Oh this couple loves to show off. Whether it’s their relationship or the other person. There’s so much of PDA with this couple too, like Cancer Risings, but this PDA is like full on whereas the Cancer Risings can be a bit more tender and sweet. this is like grabbing each others ass in public lmao. It doesn’t make it less meaningful though! Power couple vibes.
🌷Virgo Rising (could also apply to Virgo degrees 6° and 18°) - I’ve seen so much of negativity surrounding this composite rising and could never understand why, because like cancer and Taurus risings, they’re so tender and sweet with each other. They’ll do anything for the other person they’re so supportive of one another. They likely are the couple that took a bit of time to get together but people could always tell there’s chemistry between them. They can be private but they can also be sweet with each other in public, perhaps not as much as Leo, but still can be affectionate nonetheless. I like this Ascendant for couples and platonic relationships. People don’t give this Rising enough credit and tend to say they’re boring and unassuming which I don’t necessarily think is true.
🌷Libra Rising (could also apply to Libra degrees 7° and 19°) - Ah the composite rising that gets the most hype, from what I’ve seen. I can understand why since it is Venusian and Libra rules seventh house of relationships. They are also affectionate with one another and tend to be the “It couple”. Everyone wants a relationship like theirs. Romantic with one another for sure. The only thing is that if this couple breaks up, it can turn ugly as seventh house also rules enemies; their relationship can turn really sour.
🌷Scorpio Rising (could also apply to Scorpio degrees 8° and 20°) - Unexpected couple, maybe. No one saw it coming. Their relationship is passionate and deep, but there can be a taboo aspect to their relationship. It doesn’t have to be that deep, perhaps an age gap thats not drastic. You’ll never know what goes on with this couple because they can be very private. I’ve noticed this couple can be awkward with each other at first for some reason? They can also be clingy once they do get into a relationship and it turns into something long term. As much as I’m not particularly fond of this couple, they really are so opened with one another if they do get past the awkwardness and initial fear.
🌷Sagittarius Rising (could also apply to Sagittarius degrees 9° and 21°) - This is the most similar to Aries Rising in my opinion and Gemini rising as well. They’re the couple that have so many inside jokes and like Gemini Rising, they always tease each other and are playful with each other. They love to go on adventures with one another and they can teach each other a lot, constantly pushing the other person to be the best versions of themselves. This couple could also come from very different backgrounds. I’ve noticed also with this Rising sign, a lot of people don’t expect that these two are together.
🌷Capricorn Rising (could also apply to Capricorn degrees 10° and 22°) - Another rising sign that gets so much of slack (like Virgo risings) and I don’t really agree with a lot of it. They may not be as affectionate as Leo risings or Cancer risings once again, but they’re each other’s rock. They can always rely on one another. This couple could be the “slow burn” type because neither person admits they have a crush on the other until later on. They are extremely private with their relationship though and can be protective of each other. Also can be a power couple though, especially to those who know the couple well.
🌷Aquarius Rising (could also apply to Aquarius degrees 11° and 23°) - ah the friends to lovers ascendant. I haven’t met or seen many Aquarius rising couples, majority of them are platonic. This doesn’t mean romantic relationships never work out though. This couple gives each other a lot of space and freedom to be independent but they love each other unconditionally and fully. There’s no judgement here. You can be fully yourself with the other person. If this does turn romantic, they are still always best friends first.
🌷Pisces Rising (could also apply to Pisces degrees 12° and 24°) - They bring out sides of the other person that they never knew they had. For example if you’re not really big on PDA, the person you share a Pisces rising with will bring out that side of you. There could be some aspect to this relationship that’s unusual too. They can get co-dependant though, I’ve noticed. Like they can’t do anything without the person by their side constantly. Regardless, there’s something about these couples that just seem to fit together.
*Personal favourite for platonic - Aquarius or Sagittarius, even Gemini
*Least favourite for platonic - Aries or Cancer
*Favourite for romantic - Cancer, Virgo or Leo (Gemini and Aries can work well too)
*Least favourite for romantic - Scorpio or Pisces
*Risings that can go either way - Capricorn, Aquarius and Pisces.
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blackmoonoracle · 5 months ago
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this PAC is for romantic and platonic connections!
The connection between you and whoever is on your mind.
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P I L E O N E
You could have a very watery feminine energy & Your person could be a little strict or strained sometimes in their love language. Saturn as well as Black Moon Lilith in Aquarius came out here. So, we've got a lot of saturnian energy going on, especially with Libra being in the mix. Your person might encourage you to be your authentic self, while struggling to maintain that for themselves.
I keep seeing images of a couple arguing on a dock while a storm is just blowing. The woman looks frantic and upset, and the man seems very disconnected and unworried.
You could have very powerful thoughts and emotions, you could have water in your big 3 and you might be a beach girly or something, I also did hear marine biologist so idk if that applies to someone 🤣
It feels like your person has a hard time letting people know when it feels dark inside of them. I feel like they can be a bit restrictive at times, they could make you feel trapped or lost sometimes. Like you don't know where you're headed or what to look towards.
This person seems very unhealed. It feels like they will literally rip themselves apart for whoever they love. They intend well, they may have a tendency for secret self harm? Or very cruel and negative self talk and self image.
They could also be in the process of ending this cycle of self harm & being a martyr. It seems with the 6 of air that they are trying to start a new cycle in their lives. I guess we're getting a very balanced look at this person 🤣
They may be very traumatized.
Afraid of reality, or scared of vulnerability.
Mercury by Steve Lacy just came on, this person could be a Gemini!
Ykw. The 8 of earth just came out, this is some goddamn Virgo energy 🤣
I feel like this is the type of person who has a very practical improvement and solution oriented approach to life and relationships.
They could have Venus in capricorn, or DSC in capricorn (cancer rising).
It feels like they are fiercely loving & protective & loyal.
They really care about you, they care so deeply it hurts them sometimes. Because you may remind them of something or someone. Something they felt they could never have or attain. I feel like this person could be elevating your status somehow.
To me it feels like they're very methodical and forward thinking but also very eccentric and a bit chaotic mentally as well.
A very unique person, could be some intense uranian energy here as well. (Moon/mercury/ASC/10h aspect to Uranus)
I heard maladaptive but also thought of the word malediction.
So they could get very stuck in their head to the point they create almost like very negative manifestations of reality into existence in the world around them.
They're very scared of being hurt again & it honestly feels like they avoid deep connection. It's like superficiality can be easier because it is easier to maintain. This person could be very scarred by their past. It feels like a lot of trauma and loneliness was experienced by your person. They try their best to forget and it seems almost like whatever they experienced penetrated their heart very deeply.
They may have loved someone before that hurt them very very very badly. It feels like theres almost this innocent scared child inside of them. I heard sad eyes, it's important not to get into a savior complex.
Don't take on unnecessary baggage, if this is something you do want to engage with and they are working on themselves & healing I think this could be a really positive connection.
It feels like this person is a soul nurturer. They know how to make you feel like the center of their universe & It makes you feel very warm. I keep thinking of like velvet textures and sort of a 70's aesthetic in my mind. I'm also thinking of bootsy collins, they could have a retro aesthetic or vibe to them.
They may also like funk music, funkadelic/Parliament in particular comes to my mind for obvious reasons lol.
This person is really eccentric, they just stand out. It's weird the dichotomy of this person. They almost feel like a walking paradox 🤣
They could be very surprising, maybe they do & say a lot of unexpected stuff. You might never know how they'll respond to something or fully guess what they'd think about it.
They might really enjoy contrast, I also heard contrarian. So they may like to break the boundaries and barriers and ideas that people try to place upon them. This is very Aquarian/Uranian 🤣
We love a rebel
If you want a more detailed message on this person you can always dm me for a 1:1 in depth reading on this topic for 50$ 😚
Channeled messages:
Condescending, Let your hair down, Atrophied, Catastrophic, Nails on a chalkboard, Lonely, Drowning, Swallowing, Brown hair, Virgo, Gemini, Cap, Libra, Aqua, Cap venus
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P I L E T W O
I feel like your person is goofy as fuck, they may be a stark contrast against people you've liked before. It seems like this person has brought you a lot of simultaneous joy and connection as well as heartbreak. I feel like this is someone who may be a provider, or who could be very humble. This is someone who will get the job done, one way or another. They may be the type to take on mundane or frustrating tasks. I feel like one of the ways this person shows love oddly enough is by dousing out their flame. It's not on purpose, but I think that this person may silence their selves and their needs super frequently in favor of allowing others to take up their space too. I feel like this person is very in their own mind. I heard "brother" and "sibling" so this person could feel like family to you. I also feel like this person makes you feel different. Like, almost as if you are your unique self expression. They could make you feel soft and feminine in ways you haven't experienced before. Which results in a lot of anxious, internalized, almost deflective energy between the both of you. In the Eve Oracle card which came out, her back is facing towards Adam as she holds an apple. It could be that you overlook this person's love at times, thinking that there is something better for you out there. That this person isn't worth your time, which, granted I can't tell you what to do or what your experience is. But, in my perspective, I think you actually need to give this person more credit. You need to be honest with them, and maybe put down the walls. I heard can't forget the past, so it's possible y'all had a difficult run. If that's the case & you can't forgive I feel like you need to ask yourself why you still participate in the connection. They clearly adore you, and it seems like you don't understand that they are capable of adoring you. They have a very deep admiration for you, I feel like they always have. This person may fight for you and defend you in ways you aren't aware of. It feels like a passive form of protection, you don't always understand that they are a bit more passive in their love language. This is someone who is more thoughtful than passionate. I feel like you two manifested each other in some way shape or form, especially if this is a romantic connection or friendship. I heard soul connection, your souls came across each other in this lifetime to help each other unleash and integrate your shadows. To purify your souls, and to release what no longer serves you. I just keep feeling that this person is very unique, they're nothing like what people might expect of them. I see here where you may not know it, but this person is kind of a master manifestor.
You could've also been family in a past life, the Mother Earth card came out with Saturn. So it feels like this is a very karmic relationship. I see where you may feel driven to let them go, or almost this push or pull to be with them simultaneously. I heard something about "the moon wants you to be together" which is weird? For someone this could have to do with Hekate. I also heard Lilith. I feel like this person is trying to step up to the plate but you aren't seeing it. For some reason astrology is extremely important in this connection, looking at the synastry between y'all could help you better grasp the magnitude of what you are both experiencing. It's crazy how this song is lining up in a way the lyrics are "Feel the warmth coming through Streams of light come into view In a daze, but coming to Slipping away, falling through"
I honestly recommend listening to this song for clarity, Invisible - The Groovy Nobody It feels like this connection was fated or destined, I heard written in the stars. You guys really need to look at your synastry together or something. If you and your person are into astrology. I also have Neptune with Black Moon Lilith in Pisces and Black Moon Lilith in Leo. It feels like your shadows almost become projected unto one another. The Sun also came out, it feels like you two Mirror heavily. I'm not big on twin flame shit, and never have been- HOW IN THE EVER. IF that's something that's come up HEALTHILY, and not in a dynamic that is actively harmful and abusive then MAYBE it's something you should POSSIBLY consider pondering as a concept and learning about soul connection. If this person treats you like shit then forget about it, immediately, and do not engage. I don't care how much they love you, if they're actively causing you intentional or unintentional damage in the same pattern even if you've communicated about it, and if they are unreceptive and unwilling to change kiss their ass goodbye.
Know your worth. I just want to make one thing abundantly clear here, which is the matter of the fact that any point you can come out of alignment with someone. The thing is, that everything is part of a cycle, and part of a collective. That's how collective energies work, so just as there are plenty of you in this particular collective having this particular experience there are more and less evolved versions of that same person. Different people of course, who are unique and different from your person. Yet, who have a similar energetic composition or depending on how things go that could even be YOU shifting into a new collective or them shifting into a new collective. This is about matching energy, but not in a petty way. Learning that the two of you are literal mirrors to each others souls', so just keep that in mind.
Astrological placements: 12H Sun, Gemini moon, mars in cancer/4h Mars, Mars square moon, Mars conjunct sun, moon in the 9th house or 9 degree moon, Aquarius Sun, Aquarius Moon, Venus in Capricorn.
Channeled words: Dominance, envy, compassionate, bones, baby blue converse tennis shoes, Santa muerte, stellaris, Planetarium, Cassiopeia, Vashti, Cereal Milk, Vampire Diaries, Courage the Cowardly dog, City of Angels,
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P I L E T H R E E Whoever holds Feminine energy in this connection is a very powerful being. This is someone who has a commanding energy, very womanly, very witchy, very much dark Feminine energy. This Feminine is very in tune with their shadow, it seems like second nature to them low-key. This person may push the boundaries and limitations of what you previously thought you knew. This person may be contemplating their next moves at the moment. They could feel like they want to make shit work out in their favor in life for once. It's such a cosmic energy, it's so powerful. I feel like if you're the feminine energy this is your energy, I don't think the feminine energies in this pile fully grasp their power. You deserve what you desire. Anyways, back to you and your person! It's so crazy, because as I was pulling cards I kept thinking to myself how your person feels like outer space. Or like a void, but not in a negative way, it's just that their energy is very deep and almost reminds me of the darkness that exists within and without. This connection is likely deeply transformative for you in some way shape or form. Anyways, but ASHERAH fell out and I remember my mentor telling me before that when Asherah divorced from Yahweh she went to space. He told me about this because at the time I was super curious about Jack Parsons and asked about his suicide. A lot of people believe he killed himself to be with Asherah. ANYWHO LOL, This connection is meant to guide you towards your purpose. I heard high level soul mate, so you and this person could be very in tune and in a healthy state. There feels like a lot of passion and admiration. I'm channeling Dirty Woman by Pink Floyd, lmao wowww the song is 3:33 3 is the number of Saturn, and I low-key see this in a sense of longevity. This may be your person frfr, I feel like there's sooo much passion here. It's giving Aries. You could have Aries Mars, Moon, Venus, or Sun. This is deep awe-inspiring passion that lights your heart on fire. It feels like there is a deep creative or sexual connection here, take what resonates!
I just heard Mars in the 12th house? Idk why I started channeling I wanna be Evil by Eartha Kitt, I feel like this person is incredibly unorthodox. They may be a bit of an edgelord (it Is very Aries energy tho, so are we really surprised?) I feel like this is someone who can be sultry, passionate, and outgoing, but also is highly intelligent. Someone with a huge personality, they could be very Theatrical in their self expressions. It's very much giving Leo and Black Moon Lilith in Leo actually came out LOL with Queen Jezebel and The Black Madonna, and The Sun... so like, are we surprised at how big this person's energy is? It feels like you've never experienced someone like this person almost? I'm getting a lot of channeled Songs for this pile, The next one is 11 AM by Incubus. Your person could be depressed. They may be struggling with a lot of difficulty in how to move forward with this connection. They may feel estranged or disconnected at times, I feel like there is a deep wound they are healing. I also keep hearing evil eye, so you may need to be more private about your relationship or this friendship. This connection is very special, and people don't always understand it. I think there is at times judgement from others regarding this connection and it makes them feel pessimistic and isolated.
Don't be afraid to communicate with your person, I feel like they really care a lot for you. I keep feeling a weird feeling in my stomach, it could feel like the prospect of love is scary for one or both of you. Connection could be something that feels very dissonant at times to someone? It's important for you guys to not dwell in the past, to move forward with great passion and vigor is the best thing you can do. I think this pile needs to do some cleansing and hex removal, you'd possibly benefit from revisiting some of your old notes for some of you? Something in a notepad, or on a computer. Notes of some kind. Something about clues? that's so specific lol. Channeled Songs: I wanna be Evil - Eartha Kitt, Dirty Woman - Pink Floyd. Placements: Aries (Sun, moon, Mars, Neptune, Venus), 12h Mars, Mercury conjunct Jupiter Channeled messages: Past life energy, "keeper of keys", I heard "master of none" as well, catch me if you can, count your blessings, "I can't wait to meet you", FNAF?, LMAO tell me why I just channeled master builder (I need to rewatch the lego movie soon fr),
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romancerepulsed · 1 year ago
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aspec terms for beginners!
since it's trending right now, i feel like it might be helpful to clear up some basic aspec (but particularly aromantic, as we are the center of attention currently) terms. if you have absolutely any questions, i would be happy to answer, either in the replies, dms, or my inbox!
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the split attraction model (SAM): a model of human behavior that posits that, for some people, romantic and sexual attraction are not the same.
[most often this will come in the form of someone being aspec on one axis and allo (not aspec) on another. for example, a biromantic asexual may be romantically attracted to two or more genders, but sexually attracted to none. some people may even use SAM for allo identities– a bisexual lesbian may be sexually attracted to multiple genders, but only romantically attracted to women (note that this is not the only way that someone can be an mspec lesbian, just one way!). the SAM does not apply to everybody, not even all aspecs! there are non-SAM aros, for instance, who do not differentiate their aromanticism from their sexuality.]
aspec: a collection of queer spectrums centered around the lack of a certain attraction or identity. the most common spectrums under the aspec umbrella are asexual, aromantic, agender, and aplatonic, though there are many other ways to be aspec.
asexual: experiencing little to no sexual attraction.
[aces can still have sex– whether its because they experience some amount of sexual attraction or they just want to participate in sex because they find the act appealing in some other way. that being said, there are still plenty of aces who have not and will never have sex. it is a spectrum.]
aromantic: experiencing little to no romantic attraction.
[aros can still have romantic partners– whether its because they experience some amount of romantic attraction or they just find relationships appealing in some other way. that being said, there are still plenty of aros who have not and will never be in a romantic relationship. it is a spectrum.]
agender: having no gender or little relation to any gender.
aplatonic: experiencing little to no platonic attraction.
[similarly to aros and aces, apls can still form friendships if they so desire– whether its because they experience some amount of platonic attraction or they find friendships appealing in some other way.]
aroallo: combination of aromantic and allosexual– allosexual being someone who fully experiences sexual attraction. an aroallo, then, is someone who is aromantic but not asexual. aroallos often do not have a standard relationship with sex due to its romantic connotations and the stigma against loveless sex. someone having sex with someone else they do not love does not inherently make them aroallo, much in the same way that having a nonsexual relationship with a partner doesn't inherently make either participant asexual.
aroace: someone who is both aromantic and asexual. because aro and ace are both spectrums, an aroace may still experience some amount of attraction on either or both of those spectrums, or they may experience attraction of some other kind (platonic, tertiary, etc.), and that attraction may be only for a certain gender or genders– these are known as oriented aroaces.
queerplatonic relationship: a type of relationship that is defined only by the people within it. i have a post dedicated to explaining this in larger detail.
partnering: an aspec (usually aromantic) person who has and/or desires to have a partnership or multiple partnerships– romantic, queerplatonic, or otherwise.
non-partnering: an aspec (usually aromantic) person who has no desire to form a partnership of any kind.
romance/sex/plato favorable: an aspec who desires or would not reject a romantic, sexual, or platonic relationship. they are also generally not particularly bothered by seeing these relationships in their day-to-day.
romance/sex/plato repulsed: an aspec who does not desire a romantic, sexual, or platonic relationship and generally does not like seeing those relationships in their day-to-day. [x] repulsed people are not necessarily judgemental towards people who desire or participate in those relationships, they just do not desire them for themselves. repulsion often takes the form of discomfort or annoyance. [x] repulsed people are not necessarily cruel sticks-in-the-mud– they are perfectly capable of being respectful, and they very often are. repulsion does not always stem from trauma, though it certainly can.
romance/sex/plato positive: not to be confused with favorability, [x] positivity is the belief that romance, sex, and platonic relationships are human rights that should be supported and uplifted. someone can be [x] repulsed and [x] positive at the same time, because favorability/repulsion revolves around the self, and positivity/negativity extends to others.
sex/romance/plato negative: not to be confused with repulsion, [x] negativity is an inherently judgemental and harmful ideology. most commonly in the form of sex negativity, these ideologies are centered around the opposition to or personal judgement of people who engage in romance, sex, or platonic relationships. sex negativity in particular is embedded in western white supremacist societies and it is important for aspecs not to play into that.
those are the basics, but i have more information below the cut!
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> how are aspecs queer?
aspecs are queer because "queer" does not only mean LGBT. queer theory is about far more than just LGBT people– though they are undeniably a large part of it– queerness is any subversion of the traditional cisheteronormative standard. this includes things that cishets may take part in/identify with, because you do not have to be LGBT to subvert those standards. cishets who are gender-nonconforming are queer, for example. a good rule of thumb is that if you have to explain what you whole deal is to cishets, you're queer. queer does mean strange, after all.
traditional cisheteronormative conceptions of attraction, gender, and relationships do not account for aspecs. it is expected that everyone will one day form a traditional partnership with one other person, and that relationship will include sex (even if only for procreation, under some dogmas). virginity past a certain age is seen as a point of shame and something indicative of a larger problem in someone– in men, a red flag even. people past 30 without a relationship are pitied. our economic structure is build for couples and families– it's near impossible for someone to live comfortably alone. romance, friendship, and love are placed on a pedestal, treated as the meaning of life, the best thing anyone could ever experience. "love is the point of everything," as many posts on this site like to claim. people who reject these ideas are undeniably queer.
> i can get behind aros and aces, but the whole "aplatonic" thing feels like a stretch to me. how is not having friends queer? "platonic attraction" isn't even real.
aplatonicism is more than just "not having friends," and many apls have friends anyway, much in the same way that aros can date and aces can have sex. someone who does not have friends is not inherently aplatonic, they only are if they identify that little-to-no platonic attraction in themselves and choose to label themselves that way (just like how virgins aren't inherently asexual). still, apls who don't have friends exist, and they are all queer. what is a greater subversion of traditional cisheteronormative relationship structures than an outright rejection of what's seen as the most basic, fundamental relationship our culture has to offer?
you may not feel that platonic attraction is a distinct phenomenon in your own experience, and that's fine! ultimately, a lot of aspec terms exist for the utility and comfort of aspecs themselves. the SAM isn't for everyone, and platonic attraction isn't for everyone either. you do not have the authority to tell people what their own experiences are, nor should you care.
> i think it's sad that you're limiting yourself with these labels. you'll find someone one day!
for the broad majority of aspecs, our identities are not self-disciplinary, nor are they necessarily permanent. all queer people are capable of misunderstanding their identity or having a fluid identity– it is not a problem unique to being aspec. that being said, a lot of us may always be aspec and completely happy with it. being aspec is not a tragedy. the only thing i don't like about being aromantic is the judgement i receive from other people about it. non-partnering aspecs are not "missing out" on anything, because we don't even want the things we're rejecting in the first place. many of us are romance/sex/plato repulsed and are far more happy engaging with the world and with other people in different ways, because there is so, so much more to life than relationships, and it's wrong to presume that relationships are universally fit for everybody. telling an aspec that they'll find "the right person" one day is no different from telling a lesbian she'll find "the right man" one day. there is no "right person" for an aspec just as there's no "right man" for a lesbian. a lesbian is not "missing out" on a heterosexual relationship just because it's culturally perceived as superior and more fulfilling.
[disclaimer before anyone tries to do a "gotcha," i'm talking about a lesbian who is fully not attracted to men in any way. it's not like homophobes know the intricacies of gender identity and nonconformity as it pertains to homosexuality anyways.]
lastly, i wanna give a special shout out to the loveless aros and the relationship anarchists.
loveless aros are those who either feel little-to-no love as they understand it, or they are someone who supports the de-centering of love. they're worthy of a whole post of their own, but in summary: the loveless experience is all about finding joy in yourself and the countless things our world has to offer that are not dependent on the vague idea of love.
relationship anarchy is another concept worthy of its own post, but in essence it's an ideology aimed at abolishing the standard hierarchy of relationships (in the USA, depending on who you ask, its typically friendship < family < romantic partnership or friendship < romantic partnership < family) and allowing everyone the autonomy to define their relationships for themselves.
if i made any mistakes, let me know! and of course i'm willing to answer any questions anyone may have. :-3 thanks for reading my long ass post!
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pressureplus · 6 months ago
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Sebastian Solace Injury Headcannons
Warnings: Mentions of blood, anxiety, and Injury, but nothing too particularly graphic, You show up at his shop hurt and he takes care of you
(The way he cares for your injuries slightly varies depending on your relationship)
◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟
Platonic
• Immediately starts to chastise you the second he can smell the blood on you
• He doesn't have a nose, so how he scrunches it up is beyond you
• Your med kit isn't free, so you definitely owe him and yes, he will remember you owe him
• You can't refuse tho, he's already patching you up before you can really do anything about it
• What are you gonna do, fight him? Fight a thing more than 5 times your size with claws like steel knives? I don't think so.
• He's pretty good at patching wounds, and stays relaxed the whole time he's doing it
• The motions are practiced and easy as he cleans and gauzes and wraps you up
• "Because I pity you, I'll even let you lay on the cot in the corner of my shop, hmm?"
• Understands you are useless and stupid and small, so he guesses he can help you out and demand whatever extra data you have I'm your pockets about a week from now
• He isn't exactly the most concerned with your well-being, but does go out of his way to help you and take care of you sooo...
• You must mean something to him right?
If you're not together but he likes you
• Actually gets a little worried
• He flusters easily, the crush he has for you making it a little bit more difficult for him to think clearly
• That crush making his harsh reactions harsher and his soft ones hard to verbalize
• He grabs you
• I don't have any other way to put this, he literally just reaches out and grabs you before he really thinks about it
• You don't get an explanation, you don't get scolding, he just huffs and gets pissy while he's patching you
• "I thought you were better than this- You REALLY ended up this hurt over something so easy to get away from?"
• Yes, he knows the foul mouth he's got is tanking his chances of ever actually being with you, but he already figures you're never going to want to kiss a fish so why should he care?
• Even if rejection is imminent and unavoidable, and even if he feels the constant need to be mean to you so he can protect himself, he'll still take care of you
• He does like you for a reason- a lot of reasons. And he thinks about those reasons quite a bit... Of course he wants you to be okay
• You're his favorite person, and he would rather die than admit that but also would 100% prioritize your medical care over working his shop
• Him being so fast to grab and tend to your wounds is probably one of the only things you've ever seen from him that's made you sure he doesn't hate you
• Look, there's no way this man would be smoothing his thumb over your newly applied bandages and looking upset at the notion you'd be hurt without you being SOME kind of important
• It doesn't matter how stupid you are, dummy or not, this shit is painfully obvious when he's getting vulnerable over the idea of you getting a nasty enough scar
• Will not let you leave the cot in the room until you're all better, so get ready to be defensively degraded by your favourite shopkeeper for several consecutive days!
If you are together
• Open. Meltdown.
• Panicking, throwing the door on his little store closed and coddling you like you'll fall apart if he's not treating you with the utmost care
• Even scraped knees and bumped elbows get treated like they need full medical, so you can imagine the sort of reactions you're getting to actually bleeding
• Part of him immediately blames himself while he's frantically tending to your injuries, thinking he should have watched you better today, thinking that he should have protected you right
• The next part of him promises he'll be getting whoever or whatever did this to you back for it just as soon as you're all mended and comforted
• He's a mess, a muttering, coddling mess
• You get little kisses to the bandages, as well as some quiet murmurs that attempt to get onto you for not being careful
• The grip you've got around this man's heart is too much for him to be angry, nor pretend to
• You may nearly make him cry if it's bad enough, and his hands may shake at the sight of you so hurt
• Will threaten you if you even THINK about dying, remember he can do worse to you and will if you don't shut up, he can't cope with thinking about losing you shut up shut up shut up-
• Until you're healed, you aren't leaving his bed. He puts you in HIS bed and cuddles up to you any chance that he gets
• You're going to get teased when you're all better and his brain registers it's not a big deal, but until then this is your big, protective fishy husband whether you two have gotten married officially or not
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