#apl

[sans-the-skeleton-activated]

What I love the most about aplatonics on tumblr is that no one's doing any infighting simply bc there's just so few of us, everyone is just thrilled to see someone with even vaguely similar experiences. "Can you still be x if you do y" "x people are just stealing resources" "y people are just faking it" does NOT appear here and I love it

[aplatonicism]

You people ARE sick. No way those who identify as "aplatonic" don't have some mental disorder.

Try it! You'll see depression, autism, etc

No normal person is "aplatonic"

So let me get this straight, anon.

You see a group of people who self-describe as having no innate desire or ability to form or maintain culturally normative friendships.

You decide, "Aha! These people must be mentally ill!"

And then what you do with this information is send a condescending, aggressive, bullying message, calling these people "mentally ill" and "not normal."

Let me make this clear.

Your disrespectful, obviously hateful attitude toward those who are mentally ill and, as you said, "not normal", makes you and your opinion completely unworthy of my respect, time, or consideration.

This ask  is not a caring message from someone who's concerned about a group. This ask is from a bully who just found a new group of "weirdos" to harass.

[our-aplatonic-experience]

I really like chatting with people however the eventual commitment to a friendship that comes with it is if done consistently is so…gough. That shit scares me bc eventually that makes me have to explain to people I really don’t feel the same way about them and really can’t be forcing myself to hold a relationship I can’t feel the same care for. I realized today that’s probably why I really like roleplaying so much, I might roleplay with someone for a long time and have a lot of ooc chatting with them but it’s not deep in the slightest—it’s so much more awesome for me. \o/

.

[dissecnalyst]

Guess what I saw:

SLEEP, ALONE

SLEEP.

ALONE.

SLEEP ALONE 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥‼️‼️

[auggator]

not having sex is morally neutral. having sex is morally neutral

not engaging in romance is morally neutral. engaging in romance is morally neutral

not having friends is morally neutral. having friends is morally neutral

[eldritch-metalhead]

everyone in the aroace community is all like "who needs love and sex when you have friends!" and stuff like that, more focusing on platonic relationships. which is perfectly fine btw! I'm not mad at others for having friendships they love and cherish, that's good actually! but please don't forget about people like me who are aroace and aplatonic. I don't experience romantic, sexual, OR platonic attraction. I would call all the people, who see me as a friend, just an acquaintance. I used to feel bad for it but I'm sick of feeling bad over something I can't control. I'm glad you all have friends and platonic relationships you cherish, but please don't forget about aplatonic people too.

[thetisming]

people who exclude straight trans people and straight aspec people are my worst enemies. btw

[angelheart-bunny]

people who deserve more respect and recognition:

intersex people

trans men

aromantic people

multigender people

people in qpr's

aplatonic people

[bloomshroomz]

Imagine

[aromantic-spinda]

A podcast run by an asexual, an aromantic, and an aplatonic called "AAA" and every time an episode starts, one of them welcomes the audience by screaming into the mic

"hello and welcome to AAA!"

[loveless-arobee]

The answer to aspecs asking you to stop assuming [thing] about all aspecs is not to start assuming [opposite of thing] about all aspecs btw.

"Stop assuming all AlloAros have a lot of sex (or "are sluts")" does not mean "Start assuming no AlloAro has lots of sex" and also not "No AlloAro ever feels comfortable calling themselves a slut (or whore or w/e)" and vice-versa.

"Stop assuming all aros are loveless and non-partnering" does not mean "start assuming all aros do love ("in non-romantic ways") and are always partnering" and vice-versa.

"Stop assuming all aces are sex-repulsed" does not mean "start assuming all aces are sex-favourable", and vice-versa.

"Stop assuming all aplatonic people want to make friends" does not mean "start assuming no aplatonic people want to make friends" and vice-versa.

"Stop assuming all [aros or aces, mostly*] experience no [romantic or sexual, mostly*] attraction" does not mean "start assuming all [aros or aces] experience some form of [romantic or sexual attraction]" and vice-versa.

[Continue ad infinitum; these are just some examples and listing all things like that would be impossible.]

Just stop making assumptions about people based on one part of their identity. If they decide they want you to know, they'll tell you. If you want to know, you can ask, and maybe they'll give an answer (don't act like you're owed one, tho).

Accept that all people are different and even people under the same queer identity are going to have a vastly different experience; especially vast umbrellas like the aspec-identities. Instead of taking what one aspec person says about their identity as true for everyone under that same identity and then taking everything else as a "contradiction" to that label, or as something that needs another or a different label, simply accept that different people are going to have a different experience even if they use the same words to describe them.

It's really not that hard.

[*I think this may also apply to other aspec-identities (aplatonic, afamilial, atertriary, etc), right? I see these takes mostly inside of and directed at aro- and ace-spaces; but it also seems like it just applies across the board, non-aro and non-ace aspec-identities are just lesser known and thus not discussed as often.]

[machrealgirl]

reflecting on it all, i really think one issue that the aspec community refuses to actually talk about (or, at least, those of us who aren't affected by it refuse to talk about) is that acceptence of aromanticism is still entirely conditional.

i'm not aplatonic myself, but even i can see how the aspec community excludes them. like, yeah, sure, being aromantic is cool!...as long as you still experience platonic attraction and have platonic relationships and replace romance with friendship at every turn.

and if you're aromantic, you also have to be asexual. because sex without romance is immoral and dirty and abusive. and every aroallo is an invader who's trying to destroy your perfect, pure, sex-negative aspec community. if an aromantic is not asexual, they are not a valid aromantic.

if you've ever found yourself wondering why aplatonics and aroallos alike have their own small communities instead of just being a part of the wider aspec community, this is why. you drove us away.

and your acceptence of aromanticism is still entirely conditional.

[dabouse]

happy pride to

male aspecs - your existence isn't sad, and you aren't an incel.

female aspecs - you aren't a prude

non-binary aspecs - you guys are real, seen, and valid

aspecs who are loveless - you aren't any less human

aspecs who are very loving - you aren't faking it

aroallos - you aren't just a whore

alloaces - you aren't just celibate

aplatonics - you're not any less valid than other aspecs

happy pride to all aspecs!

[our-aplatonic-experience]

the apl experience is shooting every character w the apl beam. i don't care if you think friendship is magic you're apl now

.

[auggator]

if you can understand that sex and romance aren’t essential to the human experience, you can understand that friends and platonic feelings aren’t either.