#is this my niche. is this what i do now

[selfdiagnosedeyemotif]

Hope I get the one you want, though I am not confident in it

5 (this ones personal curiosity), 13, 27 and 30, for the 30 one answer the question you want to answer, but don't say which one it is (if you think this is cheating too much then I suppose just don't do it, you can do 15 instead)

5. Favourite form of potato?

i do really love poutine which is crazy because im from canada but also baked potatoes are ostensibly the best form of potato

13. What's the first thing you'd do in the purge?

steal a sword. open carry.

27. What's your go-to outfit?

ive got this green and navy blue plaid shirt that i thrifted recently that i love a ton, and then also some camouflage cargo pants. ive got a skirt that im making that im hoping to oust the pants but its also fully just fabric right now so we'll see

now. you said question 30 to answer the question i wanted. with question 15 as a backup.

question fifteen was the question that i specifically wanted. that being said.

15. Rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning.

so just getting the ranking out of the way before i explain. drowning > freezing > burning.

BURNING is a good method. its definitely not bad. its loaded and symbolic as hell (witch trials) which is a plus and is VERY evocative, but its just... missing something to me. like theres not enough on the part of the person burning. you cant really talk because the fire is going to just kinda force you to scream (WHICH SIDE NOTE. CAN BE COOL. DEPRIVATION OF AGENCY IN DEATH. ESPECIALLY WITH HOW YOURE OFTEN TIED UP WHILST BEING BURNED). but overall its a good death but doesnt measure up to the others

FREEZING is more my speed. freezing requires time more than anything, which sets it apart from most forms of death. most of the time when someone dies its either quick, or slow in the sense that it takes maybe a few hours. PERSONALLY. i prefer infection in this regard. but overall the main difference between these two is that infection is wet and freezing is dry. but yeah freezing slowly sucks the life out of you and breaks you. it wears you down until theres nothing left. the last stage of hypothermia is also notably a sense of calm and warmth and tiredness. you just need to lie down for a moment. which to me is actually fucking horrifying if im being real with you. that is SURRENDER. which is always awesome. narratively. again infection is a better way to do this (its grosser) but freezing to death will fill its place quite nicely.

now. DROWNING is the shit. because here's the thing. it is mechanically very similar to burning to death. you cant talk (water). its VERY fast with shades of panic involved. but heres the thing. first of all its dark and wet which i think im already on record as saying i prefer. but heres the thing. drowning has a few things running for it that are UNIQUE to it that i think really pushes it over the edge.

Drowning has a specific, short time limit. Most people will last about six minutes without air. Some can stretch it to ten. But there is, effectively, an actual clock ticking on a drowning. With exsanguination (bleeding out), that doesn't exist. You could bleed out super quick or last hours. With burning, that doesn't exist. You're gone too fast. Drowning, unlike most forms of death, gives you a bit of information by its nature, and offers room for suspense. You'd better hurry up. There isn't much time left.

Drowning forces you to betray yourself. The natural bodily response to asphyxiation is to attempt to breathe, and you can only suppress that response for so long. Normally this is good; you don't have air, so you get some by breathing. Easy. But with drowning, that is the specific thing you don't want to do. Attempting to breathe, a thing that you cannot prevent from happening, kills you faster. And additionally, it just looks sick as hell to gasp for air whilst underwater. You get those bubbles, your last lifeline, rising up and away from you while you sink further and further from the surface. You're never getting those back.

Drowning better utilizes light and darkness than most forms of death. (Quick side tangent: this is one scenario where sometimes burning does it better. Death through light can be using to spotlight that which is true while killing someone, which can definitely be cool. It is impossible to hide that which is true whilst burning; every feature is highlighted, which can be great for both just and unjust deaths in cases where a lack of ambiguity works in the death's favour. Anyways, back to the actual point i was making). By the way drowning works most of the time (put a pin in that for point four), you are dragged further from the surface as you die. The surface, generally, is also the main source of light in these situations. In pulling someone into the dark while killing them, it can really emphasize both a hopeless feeling and a feeling of pointlessness and loss. This death will not be honourable. It will be obscure and lost forever, a footnote at the bottom of the sea. You will not be remembered.

Drowning also has another unique way of demonstrating obscurity that I'm personally a huge fan of. Usually drowning involves a deep body of water, but so long as your mouth and nose are submerged and cannot reach air, you can drown. Ergo, a person can drown in a few inches of water which is so COOL. Like. You were so close to being pulled back into the world of the living you just needed a little PUSH. A little HELP. But you died ANYWAY because you, again, were so crushingly alone, so buried beneath obscura even before you died, that no one COULD help you. And for those same reasons you will AGAIN be forgotten.

The mafia put people's feet in concrete and sink them into rivers and I think that's a very evocative image.

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.

now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.

He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.

(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)

The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.

The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.

And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.

(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)

The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.

anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)

[so-i-did-this-thing]

One of my cosplay traits - which extends to home decor - is to insert little details for whom I am the primary (if not only) audience, but nonetheless (I hope) inject a sense of authenticity into my projects, if not necessarily that of screen-accuracy.

And that is why an envelope of genuine business receipts from the 1940s recently arrived (Crow was very perplexed by the customs declaration), just so I could stuff one or two (which you can barely see in the back) into Siegfried's accounting system. 😅

Please take a look at the ones I did not use, some stellar ephemera here:

[sovonight]

I have noticed that it’s been quite a while since you last made art for Gravity Falls. Naturally, you have all the freedom to do and make art of whatever you want: I am not complaining about this, and I still love your style and your art. I do have a question though: how do you feel about Gravity Falls (and Ford) as of now? Do you still like it, or have you simply “moved on”?

at the present moment, i've moved on. ~10 years ago i also moved on from baldur's gate, until last year when my enthusiasm returned (albeit greatly transformed from the 10 years i'd lived since then), so "moved on" isn't necessarily a forever thing

[ganondoodle]

i cant lie, im also beating myself up about not being able to get excited for the new game, or anything anymore it seems, while it can be fun to criticise things, some things you just dont like so badly that the frustration knowing it could be so much better but isnt and you not able to change it outweighs any fun- i dont like being a 'hater', i hate totk, but not bc i hate zelda but bc i LOVE it and want it to be better (though im starting to doubt my ability to do anything good with it too..)

and with the new game trailer (like, i still hope its better than im fearing rn) i feel similarly as when the next totk trailers dropped after the first one (which DID excite me), all of them gave me a sense of dread bc it seemed to go into a direction i wouldnt like, i tried to tone that voice down to enjoy the game, but then .. i was right

i dont want to be an annoying complainer about everything new, but maybe i am and i dont like that thought, i dont want to spoil anyones fun, i want to partake in it :(

[red-moon-at-night]

The Trojan Horse/La guerra di Troia (1961)

Ignore the complete mischaracterisation of Helen and the inaccuracy of events, you need to see this sequence of how Paris dies. It's absolutely WILD.

[pineappical]

A great person will follow himself

[thenothlng]

where did you guys get those. guys

up-close shot cause i draw everything so fucking big or whateva

everyone say i love you beatriz and i love you vincent

[cruelplatonic]

ruminating on 'the vees died despondent nobodies' thoughts

velvette interrogates vox after she hears him give various conflicting and bombastic accounts on air. a selection of these include: blew his brains out on live television, administered the death penalty for killing his "bitch wife," a tragic accident involving two shetland ponies, dubiously legal iranian yogurts, and a whole lot of cocaine. the actual cause was shockingly ordinary- a heart attack in front of the television, alone, his corpse only recovered after two weeks passed. he was watching a game show and his last mortal regret was never even learning who won, because he died during the commercials.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[gifti3]

the au revives for a moment....more arranged marriage au stuff with asmo and reader! Last thing I posted was this. This new scenario def happens once Asmo starts to actual warm up to MC, hence why MC is acting the way they are.

but yea this ones pretty short but i think its worth sharing since i wrote most of it already!

------------------ ------------------

"Asmodeus can you please get out of my closet?"

He currently eyes one of your casual wears in his hand. "I'm almost done! I just wanted to see what you usually wear..."

Several maids also stood in your room, holding up different outfits you would wear on a day to day basis. Asmodeus kept handing them off to them as he kept going in and out of your closet.

You sigh at the unnecessary work he was giving the staff but they surprisingly seemed to be having fun talking among themselves and with him. Actually it shouldn't really be surprising at all. This was most definitely the norm for them.

You hold back an annoyed groan. "Okay well when you're done make sure everything is put back. I'm leaving."

"Ah! Wait come here. I need you actually! I want to see how these outfits actually look on you."

You stare at him and he stares right back. "......I'm not changing in and out of all these clothes. Asmodeus why exactly are you looking through my stuff anyways?"

"I'm obviously going to revitalize your whole wardrobe. You're welcome."

"You really don't need to do that." You immediately start worrying about the type of clothes Asmodeus would pick out. You had these clothes specifically cause they were comfortable for you appearance and physical wise.

You walk up to him a take your outfit out of his hands. "I like my clothes as they are thank you." You turn towards the maids, "Everyone please put everything back."

"Everyone stay."

The maids stand in place unsure of what to do with conflicting commands. However, they were technically were Asmodeus's maids first and yours second.

"MC I'm trying to do something nice for you?"

"I understand that but I like these clothes..."

You did not understand and didn't really consider it nice.

"I'm not going to get rid of what you have silly! I'm adding to it."

Oh. Well that didn't sound as bad...

"Still that's not really necessary. I'll probably just stick to what I already have."

Asmodeus lets out an over the top sigh. "It's bad to reject a gift dear. Trust me on this, ill pick things that fit you well. Now can you try on the outfit in your hand? It shouldn't be too hard to put on your own."

...Dear?

[necrotic-nephilim]

Sorry if this might be a rude question but why don’t you just make a seperate account for your nsfw fics?

not rude, it's a valid question! tbh it's a combination of a couple reasons.

i started posting anonymous dead dove batcest fics long before i had the balls to make a tumblr. at first i was content to just leave them unassociated with each other because i didn't really care about them being tied to me. i made this blog to actually show solidarity to my partner who wanted to make a sideblog for Sandman comic stuff so we could cheerlead each other and be brave together, since i've wanted to make a batcest sideblog but i've been nervous about actually having to get it going. (mal ik you're reading this go be brave and actually make your blog so i can cheerlead you damnit-) only did it dawn on me then that i should probably mention the fics i've written on the blog after like, three of them were posted anonymously. and it would've annoyed me to have half of them anonymous and half of them not, because notifications for them would've gone in different places. i could go back and take my fics off anon if i wanted to, but i can't switch the account they're on without taking them down entirely and that'd fuck over people who have them bookmarked already.

which, ties into my second reason, if i made an entire second ao3 account it'd be harder for me to see notifications, reply to stuff, and post things for both accounts because i'd have to constantly switch. and honestly i'd be terrified of accidentally posting on the wrong one on a brain fog day. posting fics is always the most tedious part of writing them for me lol. it's easier for me to stay logged into one account and have all of my stuff in one place for me and just use the anonymous collection when i feel like it. if ao3 pseuds worked like tumblr blogs, where you can't see all my side blogs but i can, i would've used pseuds, but since you can see all pseuds on an ao3, i felt it was a moot point.

and the last reason is i just feel more comfortable being anonymous on ao3 because of the rise in anti culture. on tumblr it's very easy for me to just filter that out and find the people i want to follow and block the people i don't. i don't mind getting hate, on tumblr or on ao3. but i think, for whatever reason you want to blame it on, there's been a massive boom of antis on ao3 who are very entitled about how they read on ao3. i tag extensively, but i just feel safer from getting targeted attacks if everything i write on ao3 isn't attached to one profile. if people like a fic i wrote, want to find more i always link my tumblr in the notes, but if an anti wants to get huffy with me, they can't easily track down my other things. they definitely could if they wanted to, but being anonymous on ao3 just makes me feel more secluded, in a weird way. it's like saying "if you want you can come find me but on here i'm just a weird faceless guy throwing stuff in the void". i've used ao3's anon feature a lot, actually, i used to be a hydra trash party dumpster kid back when that was in it's prime.

i also used to be vaguely popular on a different tumblr blog and my main ao3 and while i think it'd definitely be cool if i got a decent chunk of followers on this blog too, i don't really miss having fanfiction do so well i got targetted hate on all of my fics from the same people, i had my fics stolen, etc. it was really exhausting for me. i have 120+ works on ao3, not counting what's anonymous, and that level of exposure tires me, even when i use my main ao3 to post things that aren't trashy. it's just a weird feeling knowing so many people are subscribed to you on ao3 and what if you post something they won't like because you jumped fandoms again, or you're posting something niche, or you don't think it fills enough fandom tropes to be well-liked. i used to obsessively think like that, and it made me not write the things i wanted to because i cared about numbers. and i don't want to slide back into that hole. writing on anonymous is mostly to remind myself i wrote this for me, and if other people like it, they can come find me, but i don't have to perform like that anymore. if i get a really weird fucked up idea, i can write the really weird fucked up idea. at the end of the day, just makes me more comfortable! but i get it's a super confusing set up from an outsider perspective so, i really don't mind the question, thank you for asking!!

[fisheito]

me: idk i guess i'm not really into [specific kink] anyone: oh sorry then i won't show you t-- me: show it to me anyone: i thought you didn't like [specific kink] me: but how will i know if today is the day that changes? show it to me

[androcola]

Why monkees hiatus? ☹️

ive been feeling as of late that no one is interested in my content as a whole anymore. I feel like I was always Begging people to interact with it and I felt annoying doing that. I feel like people only really wanna talk about torksmith doomed yaoi and head timeloop anymore 😓

I feel like no ones really interested in my art anymore. I mean it gets like 20 reblogs and 15 of those will be me. also no one Comments on art anymore. I get more interaction on my private instagram than I do on tumblr and I think that's sad

ive been feeling like I've really overstayed my welcome. I mean ive been here for 5 years. it was about time I burned out. and also I've been kinda depressed and losing interest in Everything I like so that's a part of it too. im not saying I'm going away forever, but it feels like the spark is fading and while I still think about mike and micky all the time, I feel like everyone's kinda over me now.its better to burn out than to fade away

[moyazaika]

will you appear again before Christmas?🥲

YES HI!!!! WOWEE sorry for being away longer than i intended! estranged family member showed up on my front door after 18 yeARS of no contact?!?!? went to bali and lost my pasSPORT?!?!?! failed my driver's TEST!?!?!?!

#life

[maize-is-lost]

Magolor getting isekai'd into the Kirby Clash universe provides an opportunity to say "okay but what if Magolor specifically got isekai'd into 'x' universe" while he is both at his most powerful but still a sopping wet creature coming off a traumatic experience. Like you could do that. Imagine all the situations you could put him in.