#is it a knockoff Hank or

[nogenrealldrama]

Just found out that the wind that damaged the train wires preventing me from getting home is severe enough to be a named storm. His name is Henk. Hi, Henk.

[n1ckelpistol]

stuff from a magma w/ mutuals last night!! it was a lot of fun

[thebreakfastgenie]

Hank Green did a tweet about TikTok and I appreciated that he acknowledged the complexities of it but he did say banning TikTok would be like banning books and saying it was okay because magazines still exist which I thought was really dumb. No one is talking about banning the short video format. Instagram and facebook reels would still exist. You could make knockoff TikToks and post them on any other platform, or register your own domain to do it. It's more like banning a specific publishing house and idk if I think the government should do that or not.

[andthekitchensinkao3]

Bits and Bobs, or the whole g-dabnit list of assorted fanfics by Yours Truly

Okay. Here goes.

A masterlist of all my fics? Here ya go!

Sorted by fandom, in alphabetical order. Whether it’s finished or a WiP will be pretty self-evident in the list, which will be updated as I go.

Baldur’s Gate (1)

A Promise Kept, also known as the BG3 fairytale mashup with Loki the TV series no one asked for. I’m posting this in a Series format on AO3, don’t ask me why.

Prologue (1/1)

Act 1: Love's Beginning (2/2)

Act 2: For Love or Duty (1/?)

Act 3: Love’s End (?/?)

Act 4: A Promise Fulfilled (?/?)

Detroit: Become Human (26) (predominantly Hank/Connor RK800, but some Simon/Markus too)

Note: there’s 26 flippin’ fanfics in this category. I’m gonna add them over the weekend. In the meantime, click the fandom link to go to all of them. Below are a few of my own, personal favourites. If I can toot my own horn for a bit.

Metamorph (18/18) - my first ever DBH fic! HankCon, obviously. 137k, I kid you not. After a peaceful Android Revolution, Hank and Connor both try to navigate this new world they’re living in.

Silent Treatment (17/17) - in which the entire game plot is turned into a near-future sci-fi thriller. Go me!

The Knight and the Fool - fairytale mashup time! In which Hank is an old knight who goes to prove himself in a tourney, hoping to keep his farm running.

How to Create a Monster (10/10) - undercover high stakes, badass Connor, separate timelines and POVs.

Being Alive (19/19 ) - so I basically rewrote the whole HankCon third of the game, in a Reverse AU where Human!Cop Connor doesn’t smoke, is not a Gavin Reed knockoff, or “Hank” as played by Bryan Dechart instead of Clancy Brown.

Only You - A what-if spin and continuation on Being Alive, if that fic hadn’t had a happy ending.

Great Pretenders (1/1) - undercover shenanigans meet fake dating/fake relationship! Two of my fave tropes combined!

The Witch and the Werewolf - my prompt fill for a Halloween event. What it says on the tin, really. HankCon reimagined as a historical thriller with Sleepy Hollow vibes. And magic.

Spa Day (5/5) - Porn with Feels, in which Connor lovingly doms the heck outta Hank.

Loki (TV) (7-ish) (Loki/Mobius M. Mobius)

50 Years (1/1)

Between an ancient deity and an analyst with a heart of gold, 50 years isn’t nearly enough. It’s nothing. But it’s also more than long enough. And Loki has an idea for their fiftieth anniversary as lovers.

A Promise Kept - (a fairytale in four acts)  A Lokius Fantasy Romance set in the BG3 universe, with all the fairytale tropes you can shake a stick at.

When Loki, youngest son of Odin Fraxinus of the Elder Tree, happens upon a charming former Paladin in Baldur’s Gate’s central market, his life is irrevocably changed. He hopes he’s finally found someone who’ll see him for who he truly is, and love him, body, mind and heart.

Unbeknownst to him, former Paladin Mobius not only has a troubled past, but an agenda of his own. Sent to spy on the Elder Trees’ host, Dyllard Portyr, for the tenday, Mobius is tasked to find out if he knows anything about Duke Ravengard’s disappearance. Or, if Odin does.

For, it is said, Odin once made a pact with a devil. A pact no one can discern the extent of, nor its ramifications in the present day.

But one thing is for certain: a promise kept is a promise fulfilled.

Loose Ends (6/?)

After the events of Tapestry of Time, Loki has his mind set on going back to Asgard. On his timeline, his branch, to either face the consequences of his actions, or discern Odin's role in everything that led up to his encounter with the Chitauri, and the assault on Manhattan.

Sledgehammer (2/2)

When an anonymous user sends an amateur porn clip to Loki’s TemPad, he doesn’t know what to think. Who sent it to him? Why? But he’s charmed by the easy swagger of a young Don leading the way into his bedroom, drawn in by his confident, laidback sex appeal.

But the longer he watches, the more difficult it is to stop. And once he’s watched the contents of the sex tape, there’s no turning back.

Question is how to keep going forward without inadvertently ruining his friendship with Mobius.

Tapestry of Time (10/10)

After the season finale, the TVA gang is left in a state of shock. None moreso than Mobius, who finds a note tucked into his breast pocket.

It says "I love you. Forgive me."

It changes everything, and sends Mobius on a quest to get Loki back, without dishonoring his sacrifice.

Turns out that's easier said than done.

Variations on the Theme of Us (2/?) - set in the same ‘universe’ as Sledgehammer, but after the events of that fic.

When Loki wants to do something nice for Mobius whether or not they have an actual anniversary coming up, he sneaks off to the Sacred Timeline on a whim.

Unbeknownst to him, the adult toy store he walks into is manned by none other than the Don of his combined wet dreams and nightmares. And Don? Spells all kinds of trouble.

Void (1/1)

Post-S2 finale, Mobius hacks his TemPad to recreate one of his own memories, and uses the time loop chamber thingie to relive it. Over. And over. And over again.

Person of Interest (1) (Reese/Finch)

How Not to Say I Love You (1/1)

When Reese and Finch go undercover to help a Number at a couples therapy weekend retreat, not everything is as it seems, and John has to navigate his own emotions while posing as someone whose situation hits too close to home.

[dirty-droid]

NoTP, do you have any?

PLENTY.

I've been fully done with Gavin Reed for ages now, there was a light phase where I was cool with his fandom and stuff, but I can't stand his inclusion in just about anything anymore, so Kamski and Gavin, Connor and Gavin, Hank and Gavin, the RK900 and Gavin, I've got the man himself blocked, but my favorite one to hate is Convin. I'm just, very aware that reed900's rise to fame was born out of an interest in the Hankcon ship dynamic so it's hard not to understand Gavin as a cheap, unpleasant Hank knockoff, and shipping him with Connor, especially romantically more than sexually, just makes my skin crawl. I just don't like it.

I've got it blocked.

Honestly now that I think about it, that's probably why I don't like 60/Allen either. I love a good pair the spares situation in a cast but it still, just feels like some kind of Hankcon knockoff. A lot of 60 or Gavin content ends up just being really 'haha, it's fun and cool because they're mean and that's sexy" without dimension... But for some reason I hate it more if more dimension is added 🤣

idk, I've become quite the hater the longer I've hung around here, I think I'm just done trying to flesh out the world and I just wanna focus on the characters I actually like, of which there are few. So I don't like much of the Hankcon world-building ships, yanno, all the stuff going on with all the other cops at the precinct, with Fowler and whoever else, I don't really care about these cops, I like my little guys and that's that.

[allthecastlesonclouds]

Is someone were to start watching dimention 20 . What series(?) would you reccomend n where ?

omg omg okay okay so i'd say there are so many different routes you can take depending on what genre you like!! this is truly so hard omg. i can start off by saying most seasons are on a subscription service called dropout which is the only subscription service i will be paying for in my life (unless you're counting a patreon as a subscription service), but they also have a youtube where they've released a couple full seasons.

i'm putting Escape From The Bloodkeep at the top because a) Villainous Found Family, b) free on youtube, and c) there's an NPC named J'er'em'ih. It's a Lord of the Rings knockoff from the perspective of the villains who are dorks and also queer. Found family to the max and so many bits.

i will be crunching this post because it is LONG! genres galore!

if you want Drama: A Crown of Candy is a Game of Thrones/Candy Land mashup. The Ravening War is the prequel. Both of them have a nonzero chance of making you cry and Do have permanent deaths. A Court of Fey and Flowers is the other drama but it's. queer Bridgerton with fairies. no angst many flowers and there's LETTER WRITING and a RUMOR PHASE

Coming Of Age: Fantasy High Freshman Year, Sophomore Year, Junior Year, and The Seven. While I think t7 is higher in quality than Freshman Year, you do need FY for context. either way, both feel as realistic as an adventuring school can be to an actual coming of age story.

Misfits and Magic is also a Coming of Age and an homage and just. a fabulous piece in general which I think is a GREAT introduction (if you have dropout)! it's a group of people going "how much can we poke fun at jk rowlings books bc we grew up on those but we Don't Like Her and actually her system is trash?" it's a smaller cast using the kids on brooms system, and, once again, it's queer and coming of age and found family. there's a wet cat of a man if that's what you need in your life.

Horror Seasons: Neverafter and Burrow's End are the two Overtly Horror seasons and they both pull it off very well. Neverafter is found family. Burrow's End is a literal family (of stoats) (not anthropomorphized, just plain stoats). they're Good Horror.

The Unsleeping City (Part I) is also very good. only filmed media that's made me cry. i can't speak to part ii specifically because i did not vibe with the virtual filming style. i got dropout because of Pirates of Leviathan, but i had the context of s1 and s2 of fantasy high so. idk man. is this coherent?

romance: Shriek Week and A Court of Fey and Flowers. Monster dating sim and Fairy Bridgerton. i'm not a dating sim person so i couldn't really do shriek week but ACOFAF. Man. That season.

Mystery: Mentopolis. I cannot tell you how much I loved Mentopolis. such a good season. Hank Green is there. Mike Trapp (creator of J'er'em'ih) is there. It's truly just tropes tropes tropes. everything is a pun.

Mentopolis also fits under action, which is what I would put Coffin Run under as well. Coffin Run my beloved. 2 vampires a wannabe-vampire and a jewish-old-man-who-misses-his-wife walk into dracula's castle and go. "hey we're your favorites, right?"

i'm so sorry. i hope this helped. i really love this show man. there's very few seasons i couldn't finish and 20 seasons out right now (the 21st is coming out every wednesday starting last week) and while there are MORE seasons like A Starstruck Odyssey (scifi comedy, 10/10 no notes) this is a long post to say. TLDR: you gotta know what style of show you like. my friend and i both watch it but she REFUSES to watch fantasy high and i can't stomach A Crown of Candy but we still both watch other seasons.

[marvelousmop]

So here's a fun coincidence: When I was listing members of the Greyton Family for a segment in The Man in Grey's Christmas Carol, I was mainly just slotting in random comic characters, and I went through a lot of them before landing on Tabu the Jungle Man (a Fletcher Hanks Tarzan Knockoff who was basically proto-Fantomah) British Agent Alan Douglas (because he came up later in the story, and my method of making characters feel slightly less random is to just offhandedly mention them at an earlier point so it looks like I may have had a plan), and then I was really running out of characters to add so I just randomly threw in this one hero called "The Spider Widow" because I think she's neat.

I'd forgotten most things about The Spider Widow, including her real name…

Dianne Grayton

(What's weirder is I mainly landed on "Greyton" as the Man in Grey's surname as a portmanteau of Clayton and Greystoke)

[toolpostsrandomstuff]

OH HELL YEAH IM PROBABLY GONNA GET SANFORD AND DEIMOS PLUSHIES, i got tricky but i wasnt able to get hank, i had to get a knockoff 🤮, also my garcello plush gets here soon so THATS DOPE

[agoddamnedrayofsunshine]

Some of y'all on this site deadass act like Hank Hill playing that GTA knockoff when it comes to fictional content.

[rejectedbad]

Rejected Bad: Melting

The following is a rejected script from an early season of Breaking Bad.

FADE IN:

INT. HANK AND MARIE'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DAY

Hank is sitting on the couch, completely engrossed in his favorite TV show about unicorns, while Marie is standing in front of him.

MARIE:  (angrily)  Hank, what are you doing? Don't you have to go to work?

HANK:  (defensive)  Marie, I'm off today. Can't I have my own time?

MARIE:  (sarcastically)  Oh, sure. Watch your little MLP knockoff all day long while you're supposed to be protecting our city. Just don't forget to take your job seriously.

Hank lets out a frustrated grunt and turns off the TV. He gets up from the couch and goes to get dressed.

HANK:  (to Marie)  Happy now?

MARIE:  (sighs)  Yes, I am. Sorry for being so harsh. You know I worry about you.

HANK:  (smiling)  I know. That's why I love you.

FADE OUT.

FADE IN:

INT. WALTER'S LAB - DAY

Walter is looking at his reflection in a bucket of acid. He seems to be deep in thought, and we can see a hint of his old, menacing personality returning.

WALTER:  (to himself)  It's been too long since I've melted a body. I'm starting to miss the thrill of it.

JESSE:  (entering the lab)  Yo, Mr. White. What are you doing?

WALTER:  (excited)  Nothing, Jesse. Just thinking.

JESSE:  (amused):  About what?

WALTER:  (calming down)  Just about how we should dispose of our latest victim.

JESSE:  (nodding)  Yeah, that's always a tricky one. You want me to go pick up some plastic barrels, like we did last time?

WALTER:  (shakes his head)  No, Jesse. I want to do something different this time. Something more... creative.

JESSE:  (raising an eyebrow)  Like what, exactly?

WALTER:  (smirking)  Like melting the body in acid, but this time, I want to do it slowly. I want to see the flesh dissolve in front of my eyes.

JESSE:  (freaking out)  Whoa, Mr. White. You're freaking me out with that talk.

WALTER:  (picking up a pen)  Don't worry, Jesse. You don't have to participate if you don't want to. I'll do it myself.

JESSE:  (relieved)  Okay, good. Because that stuff is not my specialty.

WALTER:  (smiling)  I know. That's why I'm the one who knocks.

FADE OUT.

THE END.

[theherosreturn]

(The Nosie also noticed that several trinkets he dropped were now in Bradley’s hands…and they were the before missing Warding Scales, very much untouched by Sam’s corruption. Hey, they’re meant to protect against such corruption, so they were just working as intended. Convenient, too, given how besides Braldey, only the toons were immune to Tempering, and even if it wasn’t nessecary to utilize them, better safe than sorry. Thus, everyone who needed one got one, though Irida and Arezu found them a bit unusual. Regardless of that…the artifacts glowed more, coming together…and in a flash of lightning that damage the castle…)

???: Hahahahaha! At last, we can celebrate once more! *notices everyone, including Bradley* You’re quire a fun looking bunch, aren’t you? Very well! Let us engage in this revelry wirh a good fight then, shall we?

(Susano, Lord of the Revel, had emerged.)

Bradley: He may be jovial…but alas, he’s still a Primal…so we might slay him.

Arezu: This presence…it’s…divine?

Irida: Bradley wasn’t kidding when describing Primals as being like gods then…

(Thus, everyone prepared to fight (Besides this still dazed Arezu)…and now)

(Music: https://youtu.be/lDG7ID6_Txg 0:00-3:24)

Susano, ready to fight: Let the revel begin!

Hank, as he and Whank cracked their necks: About damn time...I was getting bored fighting that Victor Hex knockoff...*Whank grabbed out their crystal hammer-axe and rushed at Susano while Hank was peppering the Primal with gunfire from a machine pistol*

[degenderates]

oh NO i listened to lovesick blues too much now spotify’s actually recommending me their country playlists T-T

[forthegloryofacavalier]

My new favourite comparison image

[joshfarrises]

Also if someone draws literally any dbh character in a Canada Goose I will grant 100 points to your house of choice

[purplesurveys]

1083

surveys by chasingghosts

Just a boring word association survey inspired by one of my old ones. Say the first thing that comes to your head. Don't overthink it :)

Keyboard: Monitor.

Dog: Dalmatian.

School: Pencils.

Italy: Roman Holiday. Ahh one of my favorite movies; such a classic.

Fire: BTS, heh.

Table: Chairs.

Mask: Face mask. New normal and all.

Blanket: Weighted blankets. I still don’t get how they work and I keep imagining that a 20-lbs blanket would feel too warm...I guess I’m willing to try it for a night, but I dunno if I would want to spend 5,000 bucks on one.

Gun: That curly-haired blonde dumbass from the US who keeps bringing one around.

Soda: Fizzy. Do not like.

Man: Trash.

Beautiful: Beast. Beautiful and the Beast is the knockoff version, hahaha.

Country: Roads.

Dictionary: Thesaurus.

Play: Playgrounds.

Yoga: Mat.

Cross: Country.

Happy: Emojis.

Change: Coins.

Orange: The fruit with the same name. Also, hair dye.

Cereal: Fruity Pebbles and Lucky Charms.

Record: Vinyl records, aka what I would like to invest in eventually.

Jail: The Shawshank Redemption, even though I personally didn’t really like it lmao.

Tank: This made me think of the Elisa Lam case. It’s unfortunate what happened to her but personally, I’ll always be more disturbed by the stories of people who had to drink or bathe in that nasty contaminated water.

Plane: Travel. :(

Machine: Factories.

Empty: Outer space.

Medicine: Nasty taste. Whenever I was sick as a kid my parents/grandma always made me drink Tempra which tastes like shit and it took a lot of effort for me not to throw them back up. I hope kids these days have more better-tasting options for medicine.

Stockings: Uncomfortable. I hate stockings and always dread occasions where I’ll have to put them on. Fortunately I haven’t had to for five years now.

Curry: Spicy and aromatic.

Football: Superbowl. Or is it SuperBowl? Super Bowl? Anyway, that event.

Blonde: Jennifer Aniston, heheh.

Pink: Barbie.

Cart: Online shopping.

Bag: Herschel.

Bourbon: Breaking Bad, though I’m not sure if it was indeed bourbon that Hank/Walt regularly drank. First thing that came to mind, though.

Karaoke: Philippine parties.

Caterpillar: That chemical they release when they’re stepped on.

Wizard: Harry Potter.

Number: Queues, lol.

Tired: Myself.

Baby: Baby videos.

Beach: Moana.

Castle: The first thing I thought of is this big orange castle - that is actually an inn - that I would have to pass by every single morning on my way to school, from kinder to high school. It looked like such a pretty, magical castle as a kid and I, along with probably all of my schoolmates who went the same route, thought a real princess lived in it; it just felt that magical. But as I got older I realized most inns/hotels with outlandish gimmicks are the cheap and tacky ones, so the magic was ruined for me as the years went by, haha.

Rock: Patrick Star from Spongebob, since he lives under one.

Hotel: Top-notch hospitality and service.

Weather: Gloomy.

Beanbag:  Comfort.

Clean: Vacuum cleaners...and my mom.

Angry: Rage.

--

I was inspired to make this when I saw a similar survey on here. Answer true or false, or simply mark an 'x' for what applies to you.

Michelle:

You love anything Disney related. I mean not anything? I wouldn’t want Disney merch of every single thing that could be turned into merch; but I do love Disney movies and they have always been great at creating songs that make you feel all magical and giddy inside.

You find any excuse to go shopping. False. I haven’t created a hobby out of shopping; at least not yet, I think. But going inside H&M several times for the past month to buy gifts for my friends has definitely helped in making me see the appeal of shopping. For now, though, I’d still rather do my browsing and shopping in non-clothing stores.

You’re younger than most of your friends. False. I have older and younger friends, but most of them are also 1998 babies since most of my friends are the people I went to school with.

You have really long hair, to your waist or longer. False. It has gotten a lot longer over the past year, but it’s still only up to my upper chest.

You’re pretty antisocial. False. I don’t like throwing this term around loosely because it’s a real personality disorder. I have also gotten more comfortable with people in the last few years and I don’t prefer to be alone anymore.

You have a pet dog/cat that sleeps in your bed with you. False. Either are terrible in staying in bed.

You haven’t had your first kiss yet. False. I had it six years ago, and I have shared hundreds and probably thousands of kisses after that.

You’re Asian. We finally got one! Haha.

You’re good at cooking. Yeah, this is the biggest false statement in this category.

You have dreams of working as a chef. I can see how it’s appealing, but it was never a career dream of mine. My dad is a chef, though.

Cheyenne:

You’re blonde, but not naturally. I currently don’t have plans to dye my hair blonde.  

You always have your fingernails painted. False. I’m the complete opposite of this, but I do want to start having my nails painted professionally as a way to pamper myself from time to time.

You obsess over things easily, to the point of them taking over your life. True, I guess. I get very sensitive and I overthink and overanalyze a lot of actions and situations that aren’t meant to be more than what they actually are. Just last night and this morning I had a bunch of dreams that had to do with a work-related problem I ran into last night. When I feel anxious about something, they would undoubtedly take over my life and it would take a while to break free from them.

You spend a lot of time on the internet. For almost every single minute that I am awake, yes. Sometimes I’ll attempt to disconnect every now and then - which I’ve been better at, to be fair to myself - but it’s always only a matter of time before I will have to look something up on Google.

Your phone may as well be surgically attached to your hand. True. I will occasionally turn it completely off so that no notifications come in, especially during weekends and holidays; but it stays close to me all the same.

You use Snapchat way too much. False. Not anymore, but I definitely used too. I had Snap streaks of varying lengths with a lot of my friends back then. 

You eat a lot of fast food. True and I don’t really feel bad about it, lmao. I love food that tastes good.

You love a bit of gossip. Also true. Not my nicest trait but I do like to keep updated. I mostly receive them though; I never spread or start any myself.

You’re really good at keeping secrets. It’s not my story to tell, so yes, true. I used to share secrets only with Gabie since she was very forgetful, but obviously I don’t have that kind of person anymore.

You’ve never had a boyfriend/girlfriend. False. I’ve had one and we had two stints together.

Morgan:

You work as a receptionist. False, but my mom used to be one. This was before she made the transfer to a more corporate workspace as a secretary.

You eat a lot of food yet you’re still so thin. True. Runs in both sides of the family.

Your siblings are your best friends. My sister and I have a very casual relationship, and while we’re on great terms we don’t do cheesy nor sentimental. I’m not on speaking terms with my brother.

Not many people see your face without makeup. False. Everybody sees me without makeup all the time precisely because I don’t like putting makeup on.

You spend your money carelessly. I can, especially when it comes to spoiling myself or other people. But I am also equally good at saving if I have to.

You dream of living overseas one day. I can confidently tell you that a lot of Filipinos consider this because the situation here hasn’t been stable for the longest time – politically, because we’ve always been led by incompetent heads; economically, because of the Marcoses’ dictatorship and abuse of power and the country’s funds; and socially, because of all the backward, Catholic stances that my country continues to stand for. I would love to live in a place where I wouldn’t be glared at for holding a girl’s hand or where most people are educated enough to vote responsible people into office.

You have a penpal. False. Never had one, never been interested in finding one.

You’re older than most of your friends. False. I vibe the best with people my age so even if I do have some younger friends, my comfort zone are with those who are also 22.

Most of your friends live out of town. An overwhelming majority of them live in Metro Manila, yes. I live just right outside so technically I’m the one who lives ~out of town~

You swear like a sailor. Eh, not anymore. I still let out a number of swear words daily, though. Just not in every sentence.

Tom:

You have so many nicknames that it’s hard for you to keep track. False. I have a grand total of one nickname, and even that is just reserved for family. Most people just call me Robyn.

You have large feet. False as well. My feet are small and can easily slip into size 5 or 6 shoes.

Most of your friends are of the opposite sex. Can’t say this is true. I can only think of one guy friend, who is Hans. I haven’t been able to keep up with my other friends, like JM and Ed, since most of them are busy with either law or med school, and simply because Covid has kept us from seeing each other.

Romantic relationships make you shy and nervous. Getting into one does. Once settled I’m pretty comfortable, mainly because I enjoy nothing more than looking out for the people I love. I’m not looking for a relationship though; not anytime soon.

You watch reality shows religiously. Eh, I wouldn’t describe it as ‘religiously’ but I do watch my fair share of them from time to time when I just want stupid, too-easy-to-digest content.

Pop music is your favourite. One of my favorites. I used to be shy about liking Top 40 songs but the older I get the more I realized that that’s music snobs’ problem and shouldn’t be mine.

Family is very important to you. Only because I’m Asian and family being ~important comes as a default the moment I was born. I’m not emotionally close with them though and they honestly probably wouldn’t weigh so much if I had to make major decisions, like migrating to the other side of the world or having a civil wedding.

You’re the youngest child in your family. False - complete opposite. I am the eldest.

You call your mother by her first name. False. Save for others who may not have the best relationships with their mothers, why would someone do this? :/

You dream of living in a big city one day. True. Yeah, absolutely. Give me all the construction noises and busy traffic and skyscrapers. I feel like I would be the most alive I’ve ever been once I start to live in a loud and hectic big city.

Harry:

You’re determined and motivated in all aspects of your life. Not always. That sounds exhausting. I allow myself to take a breather every now and then; and if I want to be unproductive for a while, I don’t ban myself from being so.

You’re much taller than the majority of your friends. Haha, definitely false. I belong to the smaller batch. I had a massive growth spurt from ages 9-10 but then it just kinda stopped there lol.

You go to the gym at least three days a week. Not the gym, but I do work out from home with that frequency.

You care a lot about your appearance. Ehhh I’m gonna say false. Having to stay/work from home does that. I like dressing up when I get to go outside though, since I seldom get to do it.

You’re a social butterfly. Trueish. I do like being around people more and more now, yeah; but of course, it’s still a work in progress for me. One thing I’m sure if is that I’m definitely not as introverted as I used to be and I have no problem opening up in a group.

You party almost every weekend. I’d love to, but can’t do that for the meantime.

You’re very straightforward and never repeat yourself. Ideally, yes. I like to move on quickly from things and settle them as fast as I can.

You love to write and have been told you’re talented. I do like to write, just not fiction stuff. Writing is my main talent and so I’ve gotten a lot of compliments on it over the years.

You consider yourself intelligent. Booksmart, at least.

You’re a bit of a player. Like, when it comes to relationships and flirting? ...Hell no. Again, very straightforward person lmao I’m either in a relationship or not.

Zack:

You’re in a band. False. Never been and never been interested.

You’re straight-edge. HAH, remember when I claimed to be edge when I was a teenager...I will say that listening to punk throughout high school and being familiar with the straight edge scene gave me a sense of belonging for a time, and it taught me so many important mindsets like positive mental attitude. But I can admit to myself that straight edge was a commitment I failed at, and as the saying goes, “If you’re not now, you never were.” I’ll always be thankful to the movement for helping me keep going during my tough teenage years, though.

You can play two or more instruments. Will it count if I say I know how to play the recorder, maracas, and the triangle? Hahahahaha but in all seriousness, I believe I don’t deserve to bold this.

You’re an uncle/aunt. I’m a godmother, which is pretty much aunt status in the Philippines. My godson is my first cousin though, and him being my cousin takes precedence over the fact that he is my godson.

You love Doctor Who. False. Never got into it.

You’re short for your age and most of your friends tower over you. I’m shorter, thinner, and look younger for my age. Long story short, I look like I’m 16 and I’m the one who gets ID’d the most whenever I enter bars or malls. I always feel triumphant whenever I get to show my driver’s license to judgy bouncers or security guards who look at me all conceitedly, though.

You’ve been cheated on before. False. My ex is heavily against cheating, and I always trusted her.

You have a big family. Any Asian would bold this, let’s be real. My immediate family itself is small with only 5 members; but my entire family – 1st cousins, 2nd cousins, 3rd cousins (and so on), cousins-in-law, cousins of cousins, aunts- and uncles-in-law, great-aunts/uncles and all – would amount to hundreds of relatives.

You have a nap every single day, without fail. Can’t do that as I have a busy 8-hour shift each weekday and I make up for it during weekends by drinking multiple cups of coffee a day.

You’re mostly quiet, but you can be loud when the situation calls for it. Definitely true. Or when I’m with the right mix of people.

Jenny:

You’re really good with computers. False. I know most things a Gen Z-er would know about, like basic spreadsheet formulas, keyboard shortcuts, how to retrieve files that crashed – basically the stuff that would let me survive at work; but to this day, I will still ask my much-techier sister how to download fonts or open ZIPs or compress photos.

You’re shy. At first; but I no longer have a hard time warming up to new people or situations.

You underestimate yourself often. True. While I know this isn’t a very good trait of mine, I find that it’s actually helpful sometimes? Setting my expectations low helps make me proud of myself whenever I succeed or excel at a task. In the long run, I’m okay with this mindset.

You recently moved house. The last time I did this was in 2008. I’m not looking to move out any time soon either as I make far from enough to afford even just renting a place.

You have a German Shepherd. False. The only people I know who own one is Chelsea’s family, but it’s been like five years since I saw that dog.

You wear baggy clothes. False. Not my style.

You almost always wear a beanie. False. I am never seen with a beanie and I only wear one when I’m in places with a much colder climate than Manila, like Baguio.

You have long hair if you’re a boy, and short hair if you’re a girl. Also false. My hair has since gotten a lot longer, and I’m due for another trim.

You recently got out of a really long relationship. True. Not my choice, but true.

You’re in a band. Again, never been.

Emily:

You’re a really good drawer. You mean an artist? False. At 22, I can only promise you stick figures.

You can’t help but doodle on anything you see. If there’s a pen and scratch paper lying around that are free to use, I will most definitely use up the whole page. Instead of doodling, though – since I can’t draw – I write things, practice my penmanship to make sure it hasn’t gotten all rusty, and whatnot. 

You want a career in art. False. That career path has always been paved for my sister.

You’re basically a personal taxi service for your friends who can’t drive. Hahaha this was essentially me in pre-pandemic days. Driving is such a simple good deed for someone considering the shitty public transportation in my country, and I would’ve been an asshole if I didn’t do anything to help my friends out.

Jeans and band shirts are your favourite thing to wear. Mom jeans and just *t-shirts are overall a great casual combo that never gets dated; but I don’t do band shirts.

You’re always wearing a necklace and lots of wristbands/bracelets. False. I would love more jewelry, though.

You have a lot of piercings on your ears. Also false. I’m not interested in piercings.

Your hair is currently an unnatural colour. False. It’s just black.

Not many people see your loud and boisterous side. I save this for my super super close friends.

You have several friend groups which you move between often. I can think of three off the top of my head.

Jack:

You always seem to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. This was me for six yearssssss, haha. The image I held for the longest time is that I was off the market and was in a happy, fulfilling, long-term relationship; so these days, it can get kinda fun watching people fumble around, not used to seeing me single again after what feels like a lifetime.

You have a fear of being single. I used to, only because I was taken for a really long time. I didn’t know if singlehood would work out for me, or how I would handle it. It took some getting used to but I’m happy now. I’m not looking to date, much less consider jumping into another romantic relationship.

When you’re not in a relationship, you’re a big flirter. Not at all. The flirting/dating scene is just not for me.

You are really sensitive and sympathetic towards your friends. I mean...like any good friend? Lmao.

Music means a lot to you. It doesn’t keep me alive per se, but sure.

You often overdo it when you drink alcohol. I wouldn’t say so. I like chugging a lot within the first 30 minutes (which helps because I’m low-tolerance and get lit way earlier than others do lol) but because I’ve always had to drive myself home after drinking nights in college, I’ve been conditioned to still be responsible with my alcohol and to start sobering up 2 hours before I have to leave.

You have no shame and love to be silly and have fun. I do like having fun in many ways, but I am probably the most rigid among my friends. I don’t really like doing silly dares or skits or dances in public.

You’re impulsive and this isn’t always a good thing. I’m working on it and have been better at it over the last few months. Now I take more time to think about things and weigh them out before I make a decision.

You have facial hair. False. There’s some light hair above my lip, nothing super thick or recognizable.

You have a baby brother/sister. False. I have younger siblings but I call neither of them my baby sibling because they are 20 and 17, lmao.

Nicole:

You’re madly in love with your significant other. I don’t get to answer this anymore. If you met me at an earlier time I would’ve gladly said yes, though.

You want to get married when you’re young. False. I want to get married when I feel mature enough and financially capable of handling a marriage and the things that can come out of a marriage, like a house and kids.

You’re quite petite. I’m naturally petite, yes. I’ve always been on the skinny side and I’m also shorter than most of my friends.

You dye your hair regularly. False. It has stayed black all my life, but I do want to experiment with green.

It’s almost impossible for you to feel the cold. False. I’m very sensitive to the cold and will shiver easily in an air-conditioned room.

You’re really good at flattering other people. Sure, I like giving compliments and reassurances.

You’re very self-conscious. And very insecure sometimes, yeah.

You find it difficult to make new friends. Sure, but only because I like to control the people that are in my circle. I’m not desperate to have hundreds of friends so this isn’t an issue for me.

People often stereotype you as emo. I have never gotten this before.

You’ve come a long way in the past couple of years. What can I say? Been through a lot, been through hell and back, been discarded and doubted, but I’m still here.

The end.

Who were you most like? Cheyenne. Cute name, too.

[dumbwaystodeviate]

Hi! Did you know you can get Android LEDs on Amazon?? What would happen if an Android deviated from seeing someone wear one? (Connor and Hank lmao)

April’s Fool was not a concept that was familiar to androids. So when it rolled round, Connor was none the wiser. He exited his charging station at the DPD three minutes before Hank’s arrival to make him a coffee. When five minutes later Hank was still nowhere to be found, Connor sat down at his desk and waited patiently.

Another three minutes and 18 seconds passed by until a familiar build was striding through the doors of the bullpen. It was Hank except not. The person entering looked like Hank but was dressed in CyberLife uniform with HK800 emblazoned on it and had a blue LED circling on his temple. Instantly, Connor was on his feet.

“Hello, I didn’t realise that they were basing a model on Lieutenant Anderson,” he approached and watched the new android regard him coolly. “I’m Connor, RK800 model built for police investigations.”

He reached a white hand towards the HK800, ready with a welcoming data dump to help them get up to speed with the precinct. When it went ignored, he tried to smile.

“It will be wonderful to work with you. Being made in the image of such a wonderful man will help you settle in. I very much enjoy working with Lieutenant Anderson. You’re both very easy on the eyes.”

“Connor.” Even the voice was the same as Hank’s and Connor marvelled. There wasn’t even a hint of mechanical reproduction. The HK800 truly seemed to be top of the line. Around them a few titters went up.

“Connor,” HK800 repeated again, “I’m the Hankdroid sent by CyberLife.”

A warm hand grasped Connors. There was no interface, merely the feedback of organic tissue, the rush of blood under skin and a slight dampness to the large hand.

“Oh.” Connor staggered away from Hank and tried to quash down the rising tide of disappointment. It didn’t work though and it all broke through, boiled over into a few stray tears.

“I had so hoped to have an android you to befriend,” he sniffled. “We could have been friends.”

“Why would you want a cheap knockoff of the real thing?” Hank smiled and clapped a hand on Connor’s shoulder. “We can be friends just like this, can’t we?”

Sheepishly, Connor looked up and offered a hopeful, if a little wobbly smile. He liked the sound of that.