#is about all my plans. i will be making a big reading list for 2024

[darehearts]

good morning and merry christmas to those who celebrate  !  i'll be busy next weekend,  so i wanna say now that i'm absolutely GRATEFUL for all of my mutuals,  whether they followed me from my other blog or those who i met this year.  making this blog was the best decision i've made in my rp career and that wouldn't be true if not for those i befriended.  i learned a lot about myself and my priorities.  i am not sure if i'd be on my self-care / healing journey that i am on now otherwise,  so thank you,  beloveds  !  hope the last week of the year treats you well.  ♡♡

[sonysakura]

🚫 My Sonic Big Bang 2024 Experience

...Or how a few months of my life were severely negatively impacted by someone else's bad management. See for yourself.

Proof of the rule they're speaking about being actively hidden from the participants to this day: FAQ – archived link, screenshot with "Who can participate?" on top, screenshot with "explicit" word search, screenshot with "nsfw" word search; Master Guide – screenshot with "explicit" word search, screenshot with "nsfw" word search; server rules – long screenshots of General Server Rules and StH Big Bang Specific Rules: Mar 12 and Jul 01, screenshots of Strike Policy: Mar 12 and Jul 01, long screenshot of General Guidelines, long screenshot of Collaboration Thread Guidelines.

I feel like this is extremely unfair 😭 One moment I was participating in the event I dreamed about for years, and the next moment I'm thrown out into the cold when I did nothing wrong. I need to get it off my chest...

Below, more about my experience with the event, though it ended up a little vent-y, a detailed (and verified!) record of what exactly happened in private thread #48, the aftermath and some fun facts I discovered or want to share:

First things first! Yep, I signed up for Sonic BB as a Writer back in January. I didn't talk about it outside of my server 'cause I wanted it to be a surprise – when I roll out a lo-o-ong illustrated fic without a warning. I'll admit, I always wanted to participate in a Big Bang for this fandom, it was a dream of sorts. And still, before sending my form in, I carefully read all of the Master Guide and the FAQ both. Seeing as how for my neurodivergent brain the rules and regulations are important, that's what I usually do for events, and this one wasn't an exception. Confident that I understand what the event would require of me, I signed up.

First month of the event went well. My questions were answered (even though I wondered why some of the things I asked couldn't have been in the Master Guide from the beginning), I wrote my fic summary and submitted it without many problems, etc. There was a small hiccup at the very beginning of March when I noticed how strict the management seemed to be (no changes or adjustments allowed), and my anxiety got the best of me, so I asked the mods if there's a plan in case a collab team doesn't work out: screenshot of my message in #writers-info-and-questions, pulled from my Discord data; screenshot of my detailed explanation in DMs; screenshot of Mod Joy's reply. Here are the most important quotes from his reply:

I understand wanting to plan for the worst case scenarios, but I would caution you not to freak yourself out over what all could go wrong! There are some absolutely lovely artists in this event who are excited to work with the writers. Odds are, things will go off without a hitch.

We are highly encouraging that no one drops out after the assignments, especially writers, unless due to extenuating circumstances.

We want to make everything as fun and stress-free for everyone. Know that we will be around to moderate threads and dissolve any tensions that arise,..

In short, I was placated with reassurances of careful moderation, not dropping writers and ✨positivity✨. I decided to stay and challenge myself since originally BB is meant to be a challenge and all...

For those of you who haven't participated: the way it is supposed to go is that writers submit short summaries of their stories, these summaries are stripped of the writers' names and given to artists to pick through. The artists then have to list their Top 10 stories to illustrate during the claims period. After the claims, private collab threads are made for each writer and their artists with a couple of mods. So no one else could see what happens in these threads.

Now flashforward to March 11th and the threads being created. Obviously I don't have screenshots of that due to being kicked off the server without any warning and before any chance of communication, unable to delete my personal information or save anything that might be used against me which was a case of poor management at best and a deliberate move at worst, so I'm retelling as faithfully as possible. It also has been verified by [artist 1] and according to them, this is exactly what happened.

My fic was in the 4-8k range, and I got two artists. I was asleep when the thread opened, and they talked about how excited they are for my fic before I came in. Both of them are 18, young but adults. I’ll call them [artist 1] (they're cool), and the other one is [artist 2]. Both artists seemed to talk to me normally.

Oh, I have to point out that there were hmm, Mods Chaz, Joy, Summers and Frostios in my thread. I think only four of them, but I know for sure Mod Summers was reading our conversation at least in the beginning because I noticed my fic's Warnings saying "None" (the original summary I submitted had Warnings: Discussion of Homophobia, Slight Internalised Homophobia), and I pointed out that there are warnings, though I don't know if they were lost just now or weren't in the sheet available to the Artists either, and whether they were actually lost or mods didn't consider it a big enough warning to keep... I still don't know. Mod Summers just silently pinned my message.

I mentioned how I'm in one of the Asian timezones geographically, so I might be awake or asleep at unconventional times, and they told me their timezones (I didn't ask!), so I figured I can make a timebuddy chart for easy tracking what time it is for everyone. Made one, sent the link to the thread, Mod Summers asked me if I want it pinned, too, and then a couple of hours later (I think?) [artist 1] came and said it's very helpful. This is my evidence for at least Mod Summers probably reading the conversation that followed but also maybe not. I think all of the mods were online or at least visually online when it was happening.

This is where I reveal that the entire conversation happened in like... one afternoon 🥲 Roughly 7 pm to 2 am for me.

Back to the conversation itself. There were a few questions I had so I started with them, basically 1) if they've read my fics before (explained that I'm asking so I know whether I need to tell them about my writing style and Sonadow dynamics I write); 2) do they want me to send in scenes as I write them or they want a full draft; 3) if they have any immediate questions for me. Question 1) is what we need. Both of them said they've never read my stuff before, and that they don't have any questions now but they want art to be as close to text as possible, so they will ask in the future. This is how it went down after (as per my memory, artist rendition I guess):

[artist 1]: I haven't read your fics but I'd like to! Your Ao3 is the same as your handle? [no link]

Me: It isn't a requirement, you don't have to! But that's right. I have to warn you though that I usually rate my Ao3 profile as 18+ when I link it, though 33/36 of my Sonic fics are rated G and T, and I feel like a warning is in order anyway so people don't accidentally stumble upon something they don't want to see and know what to avoid/filter out. [I didn't post any links or encouraged the artists to read my profile, just made a warning to be cautious]

We go into discussion of how long I have been writing, [artist 1] shows no problems with knowing my Ao3 has 3 Mature fics, I describe what series my fic will be for [the series is completely SFW, and even then I didn't post the link to it] and go into details of how I write Sonadow dynamics in my fics without mentioning the NSFW ones obviously, we speak about Question 2).

[artist 2]: [replying to my warning about my Ao3] ooohh so you write gore sometimes?

Me: Nah, I don't actually, I'm pretty uncomfortable with it tbh, so no, I don't. Some blood and a quick description of Maria's dead body is the most I have ever done 😅 All the angst I make characters go through is emotional rather than physical!

[artist 2]: oh I shouldn't have assumed, sorry. It's just the first thing my mind went to

Me: It's okay! I've been a medical student at some point and I think I've just had enough of that - one of the main reasons I'm not a doctor but a linguist.

[artist 1] gets excited about this for some reason, and we chat about it for a moment.

Normal conversation continues like...

Me: Okay, where were we

[artist 2]: i wasn't paying attention errr

Me: Me neither! But it's Question 3)

I go into saying how them wanting to draw as close to the text is 💯 what I wanted to hear because for me my texts are an extension of my soul, I'm fragile about them, and I'd prefer the art to be exactly according to it blah-blah-blah, I describe my thoughts about a plan of work for us and how I'm going to share pieces of my fic according to their respective wishes.

[artist 1]: Sounds great!

[artist 2]: yeah, sounds good

[artist 1] says something else which I just react with an emoji to, and I start getting ready for sleep because it's almost 2 am, and I have to get up at 6 am.

Nothing else was said in the thread. That's it.

I got to bed and as most people nowadays I check my phone one last time. I see [artist 2] requesting a mod they can DM to, but I don't think much of it…

So 6 am. I wake up and again, as most people nowadays, I check my phone. I went to sleep in a good mood, seemingly in good relations with my artists, excited for the collab and having a solid plan everyone agreed to, so I eagerly open Discord to see if they wrote anything new in the thread. I see no Sonic Big Bang 2024 server.

I will not go into too much detail about my state, but I have an extremely acute reaction to stress very similar to a panic attack that lasts for hours. So with shaking fingers I open my DMs to see the message from that first screenshot I started my post with. The following exchange with me learning about the hidden rule happens the next day. Unfortunately, before that I still have to go to work for a full day in that very same mental state, oof. Plus I have no breaks on Tuesday... I go back and forth all day with my friends about how shitty this situation is, and one of them asks me how [artist 1] reacted. I say that I don't know, but they still follow me on Tumblr so I go and message them, and from what they tell me, it sounds like a mod pretended to them that I was removed because of an existing rule that's stated somewhere. They didn't argue with that, and that's understandable of course.

At home, I notice one of the event mods blocked me.

It is difficult to explain what's happening in my mind without going into details of what my [disorders] are, but things that are unfair, things that are injustice put my brain in a loop until all wrongs are righted. I'm ranting about it to friends, and I think about it day and night. On March 14th I vent about it in the tags of a related reblog, and this is the only instance of me talking about StH BB on my blog. Next morning I'm blocked by the event blog and over the next 2 weeks – by two more mods, while another mod speaks to me passively-aggressively in a shared Discord server. Then I'm shown a screenshot where one of the mods claims I offered my Ao3 to my artists (I didn't) and implies everyone who writes NSFW is dangerous. And then I receive a hate ask about the event, calling me "creepy"... All this time, my brain is still stuck in a loop, and let me tell you – it's not fun. It doesn't help that my first reaction to everything that makes me feel bad is always to assume I'm at fault for everything, and seeing how hostile people are to me, I'm drowning in self-blame. Without going into any more detail, it takes me 2 months and a lot of help to somewhat recover, so I finally send my reply to Headmod Chaz and receive one back:

If you got to this part, you know that half of Headmod Chaz's reply is simply untrue since there were no "multiple instances", and in any case I was never asked to keep quiet about my ban (and why should I?). I sent another reply a month later expressing my confusion and wondering when the messages will be removed (only my intro was removed). As of today, that reply is still ignored, and the messages aren't removed 🤷

And this is the entirety of my Sonic Big Bang 2024 experience. Now for some Q&A:

Why did you wait so long to make this post? I didn't want to put any participants under fire, particularly my friends because I'll admit, the mods seem like petty people. And also I was worried about throwing shade on other participants (people associating their works with this) or spoiling the event for people who were genuinely having fun with it. Thus, I waited until it was over!

Is this a callout post? According to definition as "public criticism or asking someone to explain their actions", I think it is – in terms of calling out bad management. It is definitely not a call for harassment. There is a reason I censored some names and left vague who reported me, blocked me, was hostile to me or spread rumours about me. Please don't bother anyone, and if the mods decide to engage with this, they can post their own statement.

Aside from the above reasons, why make a post at all? Two reasons: a personal one and an altruistic one. Firstly, I hope to get closure this way since I still feel like I was unjustly thrown away when I was just being a dutiful person. Secondly, while Headmod Chaz said they will be transparent about this rule next time they run an event, as you can see they fully ignored my suggestion of doing it now, and in general keeping a rule hidden to such an extent where you lie in your FAQ is pretty shady... I don't trust them not to do it again next year.

Is it okay to reblog the post/reply to it, what about sending an ask or a PM? Yes to all. I don't expect anyone to reblog, though if you think it's necessary, go on. I'm posting it to the event tags, so-o I think people who need to see it – will see it. If you decide to be negative or call me names, however, be prepared to be blocked by IP or username.

Finally, fun facts as promised 🔥

There are other participants out there who have had negative experiences with BB or were made uncomfortable by the way it was managed, but I'm not going to speak for them;

There was this whole thing with hypocrisy and possible favouritism;

Despite the mods insisting on ME being quiet about my ban, it's now known that they shared information about it outside the mod group;

Out of 6 mods: 5 have me blocked, 2 were passive-aggressive with 1 of them going as far as verbally lash out at me in DMs, and only 1 mod gave me a human apology (not pictured in screenshots);

I saw 3 NSFW writers and at least 2 NSFW artists participating in BB just by scrolling through my dash, without seeking them out, and this is not counting people I noticed in the server prior to me being banned;

Some people are posting Mature and Explicit extras and sequels/prequels to their BB stories already;

The artist who reported me seems to have dropped out anyway;

There's a joke reason why I'm making a post, too: I have to earn being blocked from the event blog since they said they did it because of multiple instances of me talking about my removal;

I'm actually grace and most of the time write my characters as aspec, and I'm exploring what sexuality and intimacy mean for me through writing, so this situation felt a little... like gatekeeping;

My fic was #48 under the title Chao Care 101, and I want you to give me a high five if you had it among your top choices 🖐

Originally, I wasn't going to complete my BB fic because it made me feel bad, but now I've decided I want to reclaim it, so I'm writing it now. Almost 8k words at the moment. It will be published. And it will be illustrated;

Meanwhile, what came out of this disaster is Sonic Supernova 2025, and I recommend you all to keep an eye out for this inclusive Big Bang-like event 🌟

[csuitebitches]

2024 Planning

I started planning for 2024 today. I’ve learned a lot this year, made mistakes, had some successes and now it’s time to take all my learnings, good or bad, and go to the next level.

I prefer starting next year’s routine from 2023’s November and December so that by the time January rolls around, I’m settled into the routine. If there’s any revisions necessary, I can do them without starting my new year on the wrong foot.

I maintain my goals on mostly short and medium term basis. This includes daily, weekly and quarterly planning (I don’t do monthly because it doesn’t work for me).

This may seem complicated (actually, it looks more complicated than it is but it’s just what helps me) but let me show you how exactly I do things.

I keep two diaries. One for daily and weekly and one for quarterly. I have a habit tracker on my phone for my daily non-Negotiables (exercise, meditation, reading and language).

The quarterly diary is my big big diary. Every quarter, it lists out all the big plans, what i want to do and who i want to be. It’s all the messy thoughts I have, all my dreams, my weaknesses, my strengths, etc etc. The only “practical” part of the diary is that there is one general plan made at the end of my mad scribbling. It has the general idea, feedback I’ve received from other people and compilation of all the advice I’ve gotten from my mentors.

2. The daily - weekly diary breaks the plan into manageable bits. I write out the week’s plan (who do i need to meet, who do i need to follow up with, any major presentation coming up, any assignment, what am i reading this week) and write a one sentence daily update on it.

I can’t use a habit tracker for this because i’m not tracking meditation or exercise on here. I’m tracking my career goals, my ambitious goals, into smaller goals. A habit tracker wouldnt cut it because I would have to elaborate more on certain things.

For example:

“20-27th Nov: Weekly list

budget presentation on Monday

1 event to attend on Tuesday. Topic: XYZ

Reading: the inheritors

reach out to mentor, schedule a meeting

7 language essays and 7 videos

Monday, 20th Nov.

work presentation: complete.

Feedback received: i need to work on XYZ.

points they raised that didnt cross my mind: XYZ

follow ups required and if yes, with who: XYZ

reading: complete. Interesting point they brought up: XYZ

essay for the day: complete.

Video complete:

Tuesday, 21st Nov

mentor meeting scheduled

event went well. Met: A, B, C who work in XYZ companies. Follow up with them next week for coffee/ drinks.

essay: complete

video: complete”

Having two diaries helps me because i can find my bigger goals without having to go through the daily entry mess. I like having the two separate.

Nov ‘23 + Dec ‘23 + Q1 2024’s goals include:

Social (meeting new people, maintaining networks)

Intellectual (biographies, documentaries, industry reports)

Personal (soft skills, language studies)

Work (presentations, courses, conferences)

A major change I’ve making this year is actively working on every single weakness I have that I know is a potential strength. I’m ignoring weaknesses that I know are 100% weaknesses like coding because there’s just no way I can sit in front of a computer and learn all that, it’s absolutely not my cup of tea and does not make me happy.

I made a list of every single weakness i have and I’m embarrassed about and ashamed of. 2024 is the year of NO shame. I’m not letting my intrusive thoughts win.

Next to each weakness I wrote out a potential solution.

Ex: not picking up the language i’m studying as fast as i want to -> write 1 short essay and a 1-2 minute video of me talking about anything in that language every single day

I’m not allowing any unnecessary negative self doubt or self talk happen. Constructive criticism is one thing, being a bitch to yourself is another. I plan to learn a lot next year.

I’ve created a manageable exposure therapy plan for myself - I aim to meet 3 new people every month and follow up with 5 new connections every month, whether it’s over chat or irl.

I’ve made a list of business biographies I’m going to read. This year I reached my reading target earlier than anticipated which I’m very happy about. Next year I’m focusing on books that are solely about business, technology and psychology.

[dancinglikebutterflywings]

Christmas Cookies | Hongjoong

❄️ Pairing: Dad!Hongjoong x Mum!Reader ❄️ Requested by: Anon ❄️ Synopsis: Making christmas cookies with the family doesn't go to plan. ❄️ Word Count: 1,203 ❄️ Warnings: None. I tried to make this as different from Cookies that I wrote last year as I could. I also used the family from Interruption/Corruption but this is like set in the future kinda. ❄️ Taglist: Open. I am renewing my tag lists for 2025. Please read this post if you want to stay on them- tag list renewal (dec 01-31 2024).

12 Days of Christmas Masterlist

Hongjoong steps into the kitchen hoping to find something to eat, instead his eyes widening at the sight of his wife and daughter covered in flour, while their little boy, not even a year old, snoozes peacefully in a carrier on his mother's back. Scattered across the kitchen counters is ingredients and utensils to make Christmas cookies.  

"What's going on here?" He asks, gaining the attention of his small family. 

"Appa, come make Christmas cookies with us!" Eun-ae says excitedly, dropping the cookie dough that's in her hand on the counter. 

"Honey, you do realize we have a baker who can make cookies for us, right?" Hongjoong replies, surveying the mess before checking the time on his watch. "And it’s nearly 11:30 PM. Why are you both still awake?"  

"She was asleep, but then she had a nightmare," Y/N explains recalling the moment she rushed to Eun-ae's room, heart racing and gun in hand at the sound of her daughter's terrified cries. Relief washed over her when Eun-ae told her she had a scary dream. Their daughter wouldn't tell her what it was about but refused to calm down until Y/N promised her that daddy wasn't far from coming home. "I thought baking Christmas cookies would be a good distraction until you got home." 

"And what about our little guy?" he asks, taking off his suit jacket and grabbing an apron from the hooks by the door.  

"He woke up shortly after," she replies. "He wouldn’t settle back down either."  

"Well, he’s out cold now," Hongjoong says tying the apron at the back and peering into the carrier as he joins them. He smiles seeing his son sleeping soundly, completely unaware of the floury chaos his sister is creating. "What do you need me to do?" he asked Eun-ae, who was clearly leading the cookie-making operation. 

Eun-ae's eyes light up with joy as she points to a bowl filled with cookie dough. "Can you roll that out so we can make shapes with these?" she asked, directing her tiny finger toward the array of cookie cutters laid out before her. All of them are Christmas themed shapes. 

"And Eomma will clean up a bit," Y/N adds, reaching for the paper towels. As she starts tidying up, she steals a glance at her husband and daughter, watching him roll out the dough while Eun-ae picks out her favorite shapes. A smile spreads across her face. Despite it being so late, moments like these are what makes everything she does for her family seem worth it and she'll do it all over again if she had too.  

Once the cookies are baking in the oven and the kitchen counter is much tidier, Y/N feels Eun-chan starting to stir awake. "Joong," she softly calls to her husband who's watching the cookies bake with Eun-ae as she rambles on about what colour she wants to ice them. "I think Channie's waking up," she informs him as he turns to look at her.  

"Step back a little. I don’t want you to get burned," Hongjoong cautions Eun-ae, noticing she has she's moved a little too close to the oven. After she steps back, he makes his way over to Y/N, looks inside the carrier, finding Eun-chan's big brown eyes staring right back him and lifts him out as Y/N unbuckles the carrier, taking it off. 

Hongjoong cradles him close, whispering lyrics to a song that make the baby coo softly, his tiny fingers curling around his father's shirt as he nestles his head against his chest. It doesn't take long for Eun-chan to fall back into a peaceful slumber, his little breaths steady and calm. 

"I should go put him back in his crib," Y/N says quietly, not wanting to disturb her son's sleep. 

"I can do," Hongjoong assures her. "You just sit down and relax while the cookies bake."  He presses a quick peck to her lip before disappearing out of the kitchen after promising Eun-ae he'll be back in a few minutes.  

When Hongjoong re-enters the kitchen fifteen minutes later, he finds Eun-ae in tears for the second time that evening. "What’s wrong?" he asks, a bit alarmed, taking in his daughter’s distraught appearance while Y/N looks a bit disheartened.  

"I think we might have messed up the recipe," Y/N explains, putting on the oven mitt and pulling the tray of cookies from the oven. The cookies have completely lost their shape, turning into blobs of melted cookie dough. The once-promising batch of cookies now resembled a chaotic, gooey mess rather than the perfectly shaped treats they had envisioned.  

Hongjoong's eyes widen in surprise, and he quickly moves closer to inspect the disaster. "Oh no," he murmurs, trying to suppress a chuckle at the sight. "What happened?"  

Y/N sighs, her shoulders slumping slightly. "I think I might have mismeasured the flour. I was distracted by Eun-chan waking up and..." She glances at Eun-ae, who is still sniffling, her big eyes glistening with tears.  

Eun-ae wipes her cheeks with the back of her hand, her disappointment evident. "But I wanted to decorate them with red and green icing! Now we can't even do that!" she cries, her voice trembling.  

Hongjoong kneels down beside her, his expression softening. "Hey, it’s okay, sweetheart. Sometimes things don’t go as planned, but that doesn't mean we can't make the most of it," he tries to assure her. "How about this, we decorate these ones, make them all nice and pretty and then we can enjoy them with milk. Then tomorrow I can talk to Mrs Lee and ask her if you can help her make some more cookies. How does that sound?" 

Eun-ae sniffs, her tears slowing as she considers his words. "You really think we can make them look nice?" she asks. 

"The three of us doing it together, I think we can," he smiles. 

"Okay, Appa," she agrees even though her expression is sceptical.  

Hongjoong picks her up and carries her to the kitchen counter, placing her on one of the stools. "Now let's make these cookies pretty again," he says, confidently picking up one of the icing bags. 

I am renewing my tag list. Please read this post - tag list renewal (1st-31st Dec) - if you want to remain on the tag list.

already renewed:

@carattinymoa - @ateezswonderland - @forever-atiny - @choppedballoondetective - @rainyday-daydreamer 

@ultrapinkvoidbouquet - @reiofsuns2001 - @alexxavicry - @hollxe1 - @bookswillfindyouaway

-

2024 taglist.

@katzline - @treehouse-mouse - @jedi-dreea - @green-agent - @tinyelfperson -

@yeonjunnie – @laylasbunbunny – @deltamoon666 - @skz1-4-3 - @everythingboutkpop -

@oddracha - @http-gyu - @skittyneos - @pinkpunkdynamite - @keshivibes -

@katsukis1wife - @jjoongstar - @arki-sha - @lixisoul99 - @do-you-remember-summer-127 -

@catzachvsvt - @lemur46 - @bygoodness - @ateez-atiny380 - @reayahnadeem2

[goldfades]

⋆˚✿˖° 𐙚 ₊ ⊹ ♡ ᥫ᭡ TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS!

STARTING DECEMBER 13, 2024 TIL DECEMBER 25TH !!

⎯ hello, everyone! welcome to my celly! in celebration of christmas, i'll be doing a 12 days of christmas blurb fest featuring some of my favorite fandoms! each day will bring a festive theme, cozy vibes, and a touch of romance.

⎯ i will also be doing an ask segment, where you'll be able to send me an emoji, an idea (from my list, or your own) + a prompt!

AND the holidays approach, it’s important to remember those who are facing hardships, such as the people of palestine. in times of crisis, solidarity matters more than ever. you can support palestinian communities by donating to reputable organizations providing aid, such as food, medical supplies, and shelter.

amplifying their voices on social media, supporting palestinian-owned businesses, and educating others about the situation can make a big impact. every action, big or small, helps create a ripple effect of hope. let’s spread compassion and stand together for justice, especially during this season of giving!

here are some links that can help, thank you for reading and helping palestine!!

help palestine with a click | heal palestine | unrwa | resources for palestine

⋆˚✿˖° 𐙚 𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝐒𝐄𝐆𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 ; send me a 🎀 for a blurb !!

prompt lists you can choose from! happy little holiday scenarios for your otp , a collection of various settings for drabbles or prompts, or both! , christmas prompts

⋆˚✿˖° 𐙚 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐁 𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓 ; 12 blurbs for the 12 days of christmas!

12/13/24 ➜ DAY ONE ft. matt rempe | SLIPPING INTO YOU Matt drags you to the local ice rink. Matt is a natural skater, while you can barely stand without falling. Cue laughter, clumsy hand-holding, and lingering touches as they help each other stay upright (though, that doesn't do much)

12/14/24 ➜ DAY TWO ft. rafe cameron | UNDER THE MISTLETOE At a posh Tannyhill Christmas party, you get caught under the mistletoe with none other than Rafe Cameron. Friends egg you on, but what starts as a joking kiss turns into something much deeper.

12/15/24 ➜ DAY THREE ft. jack hughes | CLASSIC ONE-BED TROPE A planned weekend getaway turns into an extended stay when a blizzard traps you and their your long-time crush, Jack in a cozy cabin. With only one bed and a fireplace for warmth, your unspoken feelings finally come to light.

12/16/24 ➜ DAY FOUR ft. quinn hughes | TANGLED UP IN YOU You and Quinn team up for a late-night gift-wrapping session. Between ripped paper, forgotten tape, and silly arguments about the “right” way to wrap, your laughter turns into a moment of quiet intimacy.

12/17/24 ➜ DAY FIVE ft. paige bueckers | HOME FOR CHRISTMAS You join Paige in Minnesota for her family’s Christmas celebration. From sledding on frozen lakes to drinking her favorite hot cocoa, you see the side of Paige that only comes out at home, and it feels like she’s letting you into her world

12/18/24 ➜ DAY SIX ft. jude bellingham | SANTA'S FAVORITE FORWARD After his last game before the holiday break, Jude finds you in the stands wearing his jersey and a Santa hat. He runs to you and lifts you into a hug, promising he’s all yours for Christmas. Insisting on cooking Christmas dinner for you (despite his lack of experience), the kitchen turns into chaos, but his determination to impress you makes it the best meal you’ve ever had.

12/19/24 ➜ DAY SEVEN ft. luke hughes | CHRISTMAS TREE FARM You and Luke visit a Christmas tree farm to pick out the perfect tree. Between wandering through rows of evergreens and Luke lifting you to reach the top branch, your chemistry becomes undeniable.

12/20/24 ➜ DAY EIGHT ft. jack hughes | SWEET LIKE YOU You and your boyfriend, Jack have a cookie-decorating contest against his friends and their partners. The guys get way too competitive, but your boyfriend insists your messy cookies are “art.”

12/21/24 ➜ DAY NINE ft. joe burrow | WHERE THE HEART IS The reader invites Joe to their hometown for Christmas. Amid festive parades, ice skating, and meeting the family, sparks fly, and the love interest realizes what “home” truly means.

12/22/24 ➜ DAY TEN ft. nico hischier | HOME ICE ADVANTAGE During a Christmas trip to Nico's hometown, his family challenges you to a backyard hockey game. He’s torn between showing off his skills and helping you win against his competitive siblings.

12/23/24 ➜ DAY ELEVEN ft. auston matthews | UNDER THE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS Auston hides an engagement ring in an ornament, and while you’re decorating the tree, he gets down on one knee.

12/24/24 ➜ DAY TWELVE ft. paige bueckers | BEST SECRET OF ALL Paige loves outdoing everyone, and when it’s time for the team’s Secret Santa exchange, her overly thoughtful gift for you makes it clear she’s paying extra attention. You scramble to figure out how to match her energy.

★ merry christmas to my babies!!! i hope everyone enjoys, and cheers to a new year, and many more together 🫶🏼

© goldfades 2023

all materials posted are MINE!!!, i do not give permission for my writing to be posted on ANY other website without my consent. i will report your ass.

[housemdanniversary]

20 years of House MD? Let’s PARTY!

I am putting together a big House MD fandom bash! There will be something for everyone. Have an idea you’d love to see but it’s not here? Drop me a line.

This is a sideblog, by popular request. Find my main @oddlittlestories and follow here for all updates and reminders House MD 20th Anniversary.

Also, forgot to shout-out @russell-crowe for the amazing gif icons.

Here are the activities I’ve planned so far:

Gift exchange. Final check-in on 11/9! Please reach out if you need an extension, or if there’s a chance you won’t finish by 11/16. Find the full schedule and details here. Here is the ao3 collection, which you can post to any time up until 11/16, and will go live on the big day.

Prompt Claim. There will be a list of prompts, posted to this tumblr page, with a signup form. 300 words for fics. Each one will be claimable by one writer/artist/etc. Get your engines running with a short fanwork!

Drabble-Doodle Dogpile. One prompt per day leading up to the anniversary (11/10-11/16). 100 words for fics. The prompts will be posted on this Tumblr account. Dogpile on each prompt! Enjoy your friends’ versions. Let’s revel in different interpretations.

Livestream. Starting on 11/16 and continuing for eight days, @malcolm-f-tucker will be streaming 3-4 episodes from each season. And YOU get to select one per season, so keep your eyes peeled for the relevant polls!

November 16, 2024 is the big day, but any item can be created ahead of time. You are welcome to post to ao3 or Tumblr ahead of time—fanworks will be reblogged to this account day of, but don't forget to tag @housemdanniversary!

Let’s make this an anniversary to remember!

Cancelled events (for this event! I may revive them in future)

Fanwork requests. This is slightly different from prompt claims, as audiences will be able to be much more detailed with what they want. Audiences, start thinking about what you’d love to see.

Hilson trope bingo! Structure tbd. Read fics and mark down tropes on your bingo card!

[e-rated-beardo]

2024 fic roundup

@cheeseplants created this ask/tag game, and I've been tagged by @addledmongoose and @harlotofupdog, here we gooo

What fandoms do you write in?

200% Good Omens. First proper fandom experience. First thing that forced (aye, forced) me to write a fanfic. Huge obsession.

If I were to write for anything else, it might be Our Flag Means Death, or Doctor Who, or perhaps House M.D. or some flavour of Star Trek. Or a crossover between one of those and GO. I'm a completely normal amount of obsessed with Aziraphale and Crowley.

How many words have you published in 2024?

*goes to ao3 stats page*

*hits "2024"*

...220,232 words

What the whole entire fuck!?

And there's another three chapters left on Scorn to go before New Year's, so we'll comfortably surpass 231k. How in the actual fuck is that possible.

What is your greatest achievement this year?

Getting this comment:

What are your favourite top three fics you wrote this year?

Not Single Spies (the third part of Nice And Ominous, which can be read on its own or with the two preceding parts); The Co-pilot; and I'm going to say Scorn and the Saint-Maker, although that's far from finished, because it's been the entirety of my past half-year.

Not Single Spies (part III of Nice And Ominous: a reluctant eschatology of the Second Attempt) Rated E; 61k words Second Coming/post-S2 fic; plot-driven

A man with pale hair turns up in Saint Peter's Square, naked and without memory, and Crowley's old sense of Aziraphale's location snaps like a twig. Heaven is down another Supreme Archangel—but the new Christ is already on Earth (in France, to be precise) and the Second Coming is well underway. And Crowley works for Hell now, but really, he works for the good of humanity; pulling on every friend he has to stop the end of the world.

There is some smut in this, but it's only three sections and they're all skippable. The rest of the story is rated T with no major warnings.

The Co-pilot Rated E; 4k words Human-ish AU; shameless smut

An un-English heatwave, a few open shirt buttons and the demonic entity possessing an innocent Londoner conspire to make long-time friends Az and Tony finally get over themselves and bone.

Scorn and the Saint-Maker Rated E; 97k words so far (WIP) Human not-actually-AU; sorta-post-S2; plot-driven, smutty, mathsy; four plots in a trench coat

Doctor Crowley has turned truancy into an art form, lecturing only under sufferance. Doctor Fell has signed up for his undergraduate course and has no plans to let him slack off. When a faculty member is found dead, our heroes start forming uneasy suspicions. What was the occult symbol drawn next to the body? Why does it feel like they’ve known each other forever? How is Crowley supposed to tell police that he thinks the murderer is a demon he summoned 35 years ago? And what about that statue that’s the spitting image of the victim?

They've been turned human. Now they're academics in Scotland. Romance, weirdness and (skippable!) smut ensue. The fic has some warnings, so check the tags.

What was your biggest pit of despair moment?

I had a nasty week in August, when I got depressive symptoms as a side effect of a necessary medication and spent ~10 days convinced everything I did was shit.

I'm also kind of in one at the moment, but without the pharmaceutical explanation/excuse. I'm just... urgh. Things are stuck. It's. It's a thing. Idk.

What have you learned?

You're expecting me to list everything I've learnt related to writing and fandom and fandom writing in less than an entire academic essay? Are you out of your entire mind!? (❤️)

Big things: I've learnt that I do have the capacity to finish big stories; that things I write are good enough that people want to read them and look forward to reading them and give me all these amazing compliments on them and go slightly feral sometimes; and that if I'm enthusiastic enough about maths, I can trick some folks who didn't even like maths into sort of liking maths.

Smaller things: A smattering of fancy vocabulary. How to paint with watercolour. How to draw Michael Sheen's nose and David Tennant's lower lip. The fact that I have a massive praise kink. More than I knew there was to know about em-dashes and en-rules. Heaps of random facts about the Bible, angels, demonology, poetry, Scotland Yard, Shakespeare, wine, dicks, queer identities I don't have, and queer identities I do have. And a bunch about how to watch/read/consume media with my eyes open and my brain switched on.

What fic did you want to do but never made it off the ground?

I still low-key want to continue The Co-pilot into... something. And That Berry Ice Cream from last December has been sort of asking for a follow-up, which just hasn't happened.

I had this idea, shortly after that week in November that the Americans don't like to think about, for something short, snappy, and a little cathartic; a fuck the system-type deal, both to that political shitshow and to all the sad crap fucking over the GO fandom lately, and I started to write it but got stuck not even a thousand words in. Maybe it just wasn't that good of an idea.

Did you beta any fics? Any favs you want to shout out?

I did my first toe-dipping of a beta read just the other month, for Easy Access by @ModernDayKlutz. I've not dared to jump into beta:ing properly for fear that my old flakiness will resurface and make me disappoint a person I've made a promise to, but this one seemed contained enough that I felt I could contribute. Especially with Kilt Knowledge™️.

What three fics have you read this year that you love?

THREE!??!?

All right, so I'm looking through my bookmarks, and, as it turns out, That Fic I Keep Recommending Basically All The Time was one I only read - or at least, finished reading - early this year!

Mint Tea by @copperplatebeech - 31.5k words; rated E - is one of those fics that half the fandom have heard about, right? I don't know if it happened to hit me at a formative point in my fandom life or if it's simply That Good, which is also very likely, but thirsty-well-hung-Dom!Crowley lives in my head for free and will not move out, it seems. It's scorching and funny and sweet, and when I say it gave me the idea to try some... things... which I hadn't tried before, in... certain parts of my life... 🔥🫠

Fanfic, uh... changes lives, y'all! Ahem, well then, onwards:

Come as you are by hiya_angel - 4k words, rated E - this gave me some of the experience reflected in that gorgeous comment above. The angst is minimal and the smut is gorgeous and wonderfully sweet and I adore this fandom for making me feel hope again and again for all this trans stuff that's still comparatively new to me.

Submitted for Your Consideration by @zehwulf - 19k words, rated E - contains possibly the most spectacular description of subspace I've read in... ever? And when it comes to bowling me over with porn, I could probably just pick anything by ZehWulf because whatever story I pick up it ends with me sitting there absolutely sweating. And feeling fuzzy inside. And maybe also crying for joy.

HERE'S A FOURTH ACTUALLY, YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME:

Lucid by @twilightcitysky - 35k words, rated E. It's unfinished and I barely even care at this point, because something about this fic changed me. It's So. Fucking. Good. It's one of those (rare? Not in this fandom! But a little rare, probably) stories where the smut is absolutely plot-crucial. It's also excruciatingly clever and angstier than I thought I would like (I was wrong! I LIKE IT) and the characters are great. And it's written just beautifully.

What ideas are percolating for next year?

More Scorn. (Don't trust the projected chapter count. Knowing myself, there'll be more of them. Or I might be done with less. It's a completely unqualified approximation.)

More Co-pilot, maybe? (I have Ideas.)

A slightly more fantastical fic that goes into a smut genre I haven't really explored at all before. And which has made me research goats' pupils.

Plus, I want to look into making podfics more. Maybe get better at it. Maybe even try out doing voice work for money? (I'm talking to a guy, it's completely wild, but damn it might be a thing I could do)

Who do you want to thank?

@addledmongoose (quite unintentionally) brought me to Tumblr. (She wrote a review of Nice And Ominous, and it was so lovely, I wanted to go there and like it and respond to it properly, so I just had to create an account, you know? No other options.) I'm so glad I'm here.

@bakingcat made excitable comments about my linguistics-nerdery-snuck-into-sex-scene and made me realise you can actually make friends in fandom.

@klikandtuna wrote the fic which I was a completely normal amount of obsessed with this summer, and which led to (via an instance of fanwork of the fanwork) me being flooded with love from strangers one random Friday and getting put in contact with that voice work guy. We also had the most wonderfully grown-up conversation about a tricky thing, for which I am so very proud and grateful.

@harlotofupdog came straight over to read Scorn almost right when I started posting it - I can't quite remember now, but the timing isn't the important bit - and wrote some absolutely glorious comments. D'you know you're the first writer whose work I'd already been painfully obsessed with, who's also expressed obsession with mine? D'you know how bloody cool that is??

And finally the unhinged smutgoblins of The Beta Fishes The Big Fucks server - idk who to thank anymore because I can't recall who invited me (it was past 3am and I'd just watched Michael Sheen shirtless for an hour, you'll have to forgive a guy) but all of y'all are weirdos and I love to hang out with yous and draw dicks and discuss writing and scream about Rivals and definitely not put mustaches on anyone.

No-pressure tags (in addition to everyone tagged above - please feel free to consider yourselves tagged-tagged if you like) without checking who's already been tagged in this before, because that's A Lot of Work that I don't want to do:

@wiblywoblytimeywimey754 @brenna @majnoonathelibrarian annnnd @kiratastic, pretty sure this could be modified to work for an art perspective too? Right? (If you want)

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Random QL Grievances: 2024 Edition

Once again taking @lurkingshan's lead and doing my own version of this one. And in case the word grievances in bold and in the title is not enough of a clue, I will be saying not so nice things about some shows. You've been warned.

"The root of disappointment is expectation" Shows that were promising even before they started or that raised expectations and didn't follow through.

Last Twilight

I had high expectations for this show from the team and the story alone, and they were met until the halfway point, ok maybe episode 8. When it was good, it was really good. But when it turned bad, it turned irredeemably bad. Like I said at the time, this show had a real opportunity to say something about people with disabilities and also class disparity. But the message that one can only be happy when they're abled and one can only be worthy when they have "a proper job" is one that still pisses me off today. In my mind, they broke up not long after and Mhok is happy in with someone else in Hawaii.

23.5 Degrees

Speaking of badly handled characters...This show did so many things wrong, but the one that hurt me the most was what they did with Aylin. Once again, the message is, you need to change what is unique or different about you in order to be accepted and by extent be happy. I hate it.

Wandee Goodday

It started off so strong. A lot of things pissed me off about this show by the end, so I'll just mention the one that still kinda makes my blood boil. The most atrocious case of pair the spares.

The On1y One

More than anything, what pissed me off the most about the ending of this was that I felt like I was manipulated. I felt they purposefully left the story without any resolution, to make sure they got a second season. Because the director was asking viewers to put pressure on whoever, and to talk about the show and sign petitions or whatever the hell it was, while the show is still on, so for me felt like it was all planned. They did a disservice to their own work and their own team by stretching this story and adding elements to make sure it couldn't possibly be told in one season. And I have no issue with planning for a second season, but there are ways to do this and still make the audience feel like they saw a story with a start, a middle and an end. Even if it's an open ending.

I Hear the Sunspot

If you follow me or know anything about me, you know that it hurts my soul to put a jbl on this list. I am in pain. But I couldn't not do it. This was one of the biggest disappointments of the year for me. Not only because it's a jbl, but because from the start it had everything going for it. I still can't believe they managed to so spectacularly ruin this show in its second half. I said enough about it at the time, no point going into it again.

Other 2024 big disappointments :Jack & Joker (not enough bl in this bl), Unknown (that ending), The Sign (what a mess), Love is Better the Second Time Around (in so much pain), My Strawberry Film (it's not a bl but also doesn't know it is).

Other Random Grievances

Biggest Loss of Trust aka #in nobody we trust - Blossom Campus

Strongberry... What the hell? Nothing that strongberry has ever produced before could've prepared me for this mess. I still have no words for whatever this was.

It should've stayed on the shelf -Love is Like a Cat

There was no love and no cat. And they killed the dog. And if that wasn't enough, it was just so incredibly boring.

Worst adaption of a webtoon - Jazz for Two

As it turns out, pretty is not enough. Who knew? But seriously, Korea always gives me the pretty pictures and the pretty people. But this was awful. I read the source material and honestly it baffles me how they could make so many wrong choices.

Biggest waste of a good premise and excellent visuals - Dead friend Forever & 4 Minutes

And they killed Fuaiz TWICE!!!! I'm just gonna assume that his characters will not survive from now on. Anyway. I really loved the visuals of both these shows. But the writing just couldn't measure up. They both stumbled at the end, although I think 4 minutes stumbled way before that.

I think maybe I should stop. Anyway I only included shows I watched till the end, and not ones I dropped.

[eeunoia]

ENHYPEN Series

sinag — psh.

chapter seven

pairings: park sunghoon x reader

synopsis: waiting for a great plot twist in your life, the ruthless and powerful mafia boss park sunghoon forced his way in to it.

word count: 2.6k

warnings: contains harrassment, violence, guns, killings, abuse, obsessive love & other stuff. if you can't take this stuff, feel free to scroll away. let me know if i missed some.

note: i’m not sure if the story is slowburn, but i wil take my time with sinag. anyway, thank you so much for reading. replies & reblogs will be appreciated. ily, stay safe.

eeunoia 2024 © all rights reserved.

“I admire your dedication and how brave you are, really. At a young age you managed to start building your empire. Honestly, I’m impressed.” he stated and then took a puff from his thick expensive tabaco.

“But we’ve been in partnership with the Kwons for years already, Mr. Park.” the old business man with so much influence stated while sitting in front of Sunghoon.

The young mafia boss smirks, back leaning over his swivel chair. He looked relaxed and confidence ooze from him, mainly why despite the age difference, the men he gathered today gave him respect. He’s known for being so impulsive and often take risks when it comes to business. Wreckless, if someone will describe it at one word. But God, is he good at it. He clearly knows what he’s doing.

“Exactly...” he starts and tilts his head while eyeing each and everyone of them. “you’ve been partnered with the Kwons and yet no development. You are still there. Making money, yes. But not growing.” his words were precised making them speechless.

They eyed each other and that statement obviously left something in them. He was right anyway. The silence stretched for five minutes before one reached over his pen and signed the contract in front of him. The others watched with utter shock on their faces.

Sunghoon’s smirk grew in victory before he stood up to shake hand with his new investor/partner. With the lead of his first alliance, the others gradually followed and signed his contract as well. It was a sure victory for him again. Another gain for him and a lost to the Kwons. He won’t stop until he stripped them off of everything they have. They kept on going on his way and so he needs to get rid of them.

The meeting ends smoothly and after everyone left the conference room, Sunghoon stood in front of the big clear windows and stared at the view of city lights beneath him. It was relaxing, makes him forget about being frustrated in the continuous failure of searching for you.

“There you are," he craned his neck and looked over his shoulder when he heard somebody talked.

Jake stood by his door, his coat off and only left with his white longsleeves polo that he wears under it. It seems like his friend had a long day of work as well. What else does he even do other than bury himself with paperworks and make more money despite having many of them already?

“I thought you’re in Italy?” Sunghoon turns back and once again looked over the view while asking his friend.

He heard the sound of a chair moving, maybe he sat down.

“That was the other day. I got back last night.” he stated and he only responded with a nod.

Sunghoon has a lot of things in his mind lately. His plan on making the Kwon fall apart, expanding his empire and of course, to find you. That’s the most important thing in his list. The most highlighted one, the priority.

“Do you think I’m really losing my mind like how they’re implying?” he suddenly blurted out that caught Jake’s attention. He watched how his friend blankly stared outside the windows.

He wanted so bad to tell him that he had found you. That you aren’t just a hallucinations created by his mind, but a true person. But he knew well more than to distract him from what he should acquire first.

Freedom.

Sunghoon may seem like he’s free as he usually do everything he pleases, but no. He knows that himself. Even if how many times he reject and deny it, he’s in fact attached to his Father’s shadow. He’s part of his dark past that will always find a way to hunt him. He needed to be even more successful without being aligned or connected to him. He needs to stand up on his own feet, til the day that his Father won’t be mentioned every time he succeed on something. Until he proved everyone he don’t need his glorious name and influence in the mafia world to be well known. To be feared.

Jake sighs and stood up before trudging closer to his friend. He clapped his shoulder once before sliding his hands inside his pockets then joined him on watching the busy city beneath them.

“No.” he simply answered.

It was just a one word answer. It may mean nothing or unsincere for some, but for Sunghoon that means a lot already. Jake Sim is the type of person who never lies. His honestly in terms of business had been applied even outside his workplace. He knew Jake won’t say words just to make him feel better. He’s his friend. He will say the most hurtful things if he knew Sunghoon needs to hear it.

“But I’ve searched everywhere already. Maybe they’re all right? That I’m insane for looking for someone who might actually didn’t exist.” his eyes dark and sad.

Jake was there ever since day one. Since the day he started to look for you. He’ll be honest, before he can even found you he thought his friend was just hallucinating. Or maybe he mixed someone’s face with someone and suddenly came up with a new face if that’s believable enough to stop him from searching.

But the way his eyes looked so hopeful and excited whenever a new information about your whereabouts came, indicates how serious he is with you. He’d never seen his friend like that ever since. He never looked more alive. And so he believed and he never failed.

He claps his friend’s shoulder. “The world is bigger than you think, Sunghoon. We’re going to find her.” he stated seriously.

“You’re going to see her soon.” he added, eyes looking at him meaningfully.

Sunghoon nods his head and smiles a little. “You’re right. I’m going to see her soon.”

Sunghoon is busy reviewing some paperworks when someone suddenly burst his door open. It was so hard that it made a loud sound. He seemed unfazed about it and lifts his head up to meet the person who dares to disturb him.

A grin appeared his face as he settles the folder down his office table. The view of raging Mr. Kwon just makes him feel funny.

“I don’t think you set an appointment with me today, Mr. Kwon.” he taunts that made the man even more mad.

“How dare you steal my investors from me?! Is this your way of starting a war with me?” he sighed heavily, trying to calm himself even if its no use. He was obviously very mad, face red and hand clenched into fists.

“You are just a kid. You don’t know who you’re dealing with.”

His statements almost made Sunghoon laugh at his face. He looked pathetic in his eyes. It didn’t even made him scared.

He sighs and slowly leans his back over his swivel chair then sat comfortably in a dominating position. He saw how it added fuel to the firing rage of Mr. Kwon.

“I already warned you, didn’t I?”

Sunghoon’s smirk faded and he stared at him with blank face. He stood up and struts closer to him and he stopped infront of Mr. Kwon. He puts his hands inside his pocket and stood proudly. The amount of power and confidence oozing from him are unmeasurable. It made Mr. Kwon a little anxious, but he tries his best not to look scared. After all, fear is what makes the hunt for predators more fun.

“Get out of my fucking way my way.” he said sternly that left the older man speechless and stoned to his position.

Sunghoon tilts his head, “Take it as a warning.” he turns his back and went close to his table to click on the intercom.

“Escort Mr. Kwon out of my office. We are done talking.” and he gave another look on him before going back to his table.

On the other hand, Jake and Ni-ki are on their way to the company where you’re working at. It’s been almost three weeks since you started your job and he just wants to check on you. Make sure everything is all right and smooth for your advantage.

“Are you really sure its her, hyung?”

“Riki, you’ve checked it yourself. You already digged some informations that clearly matched her with the same girl Sunghoon was talking about back in that country.” Jake sounded like he’s slowly losing patience with his friend.

The younger one nods, “Ah right. It’s just still fascinating for me. She did really exist.” he says amused.

“Sunghoon hyung is not crazy!”

Jake grinned and scoffed before swatting the younger one's shoulder. He whined a little, but still pull his teasing grin.

“He might actually go crazy if he don’t see her.” Jake added after a big sigh.

“This is a slap on Jay hyung’s face. He always teases Hoon hyung about her.”

“You cannot tell him.”

“I won’t, don’t worry!”

“You better.” Jake says as a warning.

Ni-ki raised his right hand and even crossed his heart in joking way. He looked extra excited so Jake reminded him that they won’t really show themselves to you. They just went there to observe and to check on how are you doing lately.

“When do you plan on making them meet?” Ni-ki asked, again curious to what’s about to unfold.

Jake shrugged his shoulders off. “Probably soon.”

“Next month?”

“Not that soon. Sunghoon still have a lot of things on his plate.”

The younger one nodded, understanding the situation despite feeling impatient. He couldn’t deny it but he wants so bad to know how will his Sunghoon hyung reacts once he saw you.

“So our job is to babysit for him?”

Jake chuckles on the way he describe what they’re currently doing.

”Yes.” he answered.

“What do I get in return?” the sly smirk on his face obviously shows why he’s their maknae.

Jake rolled his eyes. “Do you always need something in return? He’s our friend.”

“Business is business, hyung.” he shrugs his shoulders. “And besides, you got a check from hyung!” and even knudge his shoulder.

Jake chuckles. “Let’s first make sure she will be safe until the time they meet and maybe Hoon will gift you something.”

“Do you think he will give me another private plane?” he wonders.

“You’re unbelievable.”

“Good morning, Aelia!” your head lifts from fixing your uniform and search for the person who greeted you.

A wave is what you respond to them with your warm smile. It’s been weeks ever since you started and so far you’re enjoying your work. The people in the office are nice and friendly. You can say you have a better office environment compared to your previous workplace.

“Hi, Aelia!” another one greets you and stood still beside each other.

“Hello, good morning.” cheeks tinted a bit red, feeling shy.

“How’s your sleep? I saw you going out from the building pretty late. Overtime?” he asks, eyes never leaving you. As far as you remember, he’s part of the Finance Department. Their floor is just below yours and he oftens visit your floor whenever they have to breakdown some office expenses.

“Yes.” you shortly replied.

He didn’t seem bothered by your response and was about to ask more when a bunch of other employees enters the elevator.

When his floor tings, he glanced at your direction one last time then waved. You gave him a nod and he left. It’s not that you’re being rude or anything, you just really don’t know how to deal with men right now. It still make you uncomfy and anxious sometimes.

The moment you arrived your floor, a crowd of early employees are gathered over by the side. A pout made its way over your lips as curiosity struck you. They seemed so hook to whatever that is that they’re talking about. You have to walk by them in order to go to your office and when you’re near enough, one of them noticed you.

“Ohh! Miss Aelia!” she called and smiled brightly over you before heading your way.

You waved because she’s so adorable. She’s part of your team and you can say that she’s very nice.

“I told you to just call me Aelia, Clara.”

She giggled and stalked behind when you walk towards your office, ignoring the crowd of employees all circled early morning.

You sets down your things at your office table before taking off your long coat. Clara watches you with a small smile.

“What’s with the crowd? It’s very early for that, don’t you think?” finally found the courage to ask about it.

“Oh!” she exclaims and glanced over them once before looking back at you. “Should I tell them off? I can go and—”

“No, no!” you are quick to refrain her from doing so. She stopped her tracks and faced you with a little surprise look.

“It’s fine, let them be. Its not yet office hours anyway, so its totally fine.” and you end it with a warm smile. She nods and eyes settles over you.

“They’re actually watching the footage of the shootout that happened last night.” she suddenly says.

Your brows narrowed and glanced at her direction, confusion mirroring your expression.

“Shoot out?”

She nods again, “Yes! There’s a lot of people who died last night. I bet its because of those mafia families again...” her eyes looked terrified just by the mere mention of that word. She held her arms together, like giving herself a hug and shivers.

“I still can’t believe mafias really exists. It gives me chills.” she mumbles and you fell silent.

Memories of that night starts to flows back in your mind. Suddenly, you can remember that cold, silent night that still gives you nightmares from time to time. You cleared your throat and glanced back at Clara.

“Why isn’t it on the news? What did the goverment even doing?”

She pouts and shook her head, “The government can’t do anything about it. Those families are very powerful that even the police doesn’t want to get involve.” she states in a low tone.

“I heard it was Park Sunghoon last night.” she added and her eyes flashes fear. “Even by just hearing his name, I’m already shaking.”

You’ve heard his name before and never once with a good news. A lot of people fears him and often describes him as someone ruthless. Well, that ain’t a surprise from a mafia. Sometimes, you wonder how he looks like. Is he old? Probably, right? If he’s this powerful and influencial already then he must have been aged.

“I just really hope I can avoid encountering any of them.” she states.

You pout and nodded in agreement. That’s the best way to avoid trouble and to keep your precious life. They said there’s a lot of temptations that comes along with getting involve with people like them. Money is one of the common temptress. Something that people cannot ignore instantly.

“Me too, Clara. I will do my best to avoid getting involve with them.”

main master-list

permanent taglist:

@rubyanne @map-of-border @hwangjangmi @love13tter @candewlsy @simpforniki @classicroyalty @bridgebridgebirdiebridge @hime98 @moonsclassyslore @ddeonubaby @yeoungie @acciomylove @mymeloem19 @jvngw0n @dreamjerky @minamoons @clar-iii @herasalvatore @nyfwyeonjun @rcveribin @yizhoutv @one16core @soobin-chois @kyutiepeachy @chareadingpurposes @hwalllllllelujah @solelyenha @90sni-ki @nourhan-8 @nikipedia07 @yangbreads @drunkjazed @kimmchijjajang @hoonbrry @axartia @all4haru @sta-rie @hiqhkey @purplepuppychild @iceeee @wtfhyuck @tobiosbbyghorl @nikililmj @moonlightisland @ayayiiie @aeyeree

sinag taglist:

@heeseung-min @lovingvoidgoatee @dimplewonie

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

i'm not gonna do a big year in review post like i did last year because on a strictly numerical level (a) i probably technically failed most of my resolutions and (b) i don't actually have the data because one of the ones i definitely failed was logging my habits to keep up, which i stopped doing in september when work got crazy and never picked back up. still ultimately i feel good about how things went down, generally. i didn't quite make this the year i got back into reading but i read more than i had the year before for sure, and i saw a lot of movies, most of them interesting or enjoyable, and some other art, too (the jenny holzer installation at the guggenheim, the ibsen play starring jeremy strong). i definitely listened to way more music. i got so good at hydrating by the end of the year that now i feel off if i drink less than 100 ounces a day lmao. i don't think i hit a 50% workout rate but i had a june that took working out off the map for several weeks and then when i tried to get back into it at the level i'd been doing before it sucked and i needed way more rest days for a long ass time; lesson learned for the future, and right now i feel like i have a good routine going. steps was kind of a similar story but this fall was pretty successful (having a zillion clients all over the goddamn city was helpful in that regard). i do want to be more proactive about it on a day to day basis because i do think it might help me sleep to hit that 10k or so (and i think it helps with soreness too, preventatively and amelioratively, which spellcheck says is not a word but should be!!) but i'm feeling more and more like flexibility is the name of the game in some things so while i will be tracking them daily/weekly/monthly this year, i will ultimately consider it a win if i get to december 31 with 3,650,000 behind me.

i fell off on logging and journaling, and never really got a handle on doing mobility work or meditating, but i finished the year feeling like while on the one hand it was nice to know i had enough structures in place to make it through my busy season a little on edge but never really losing my mind, i also felt like ignoring these things completely for a while ultimately as i look back drew my attention to why i wanted to make space for them in the first place; the morning routine stuff is where i get it together enough to check in on my life, process some stuff, and make adjustments as necessary; doing some kind of mobility stuff, even if it's just hitting the foam roller at bedtime, is just physically necessary if i want to keep working out the way i have been working out and i have to stop acting like i can have one without the other.

i decided for 2024 i didn't need to set a guideline around internet use the way i had in 2023, just an intention to be mindful, and, um, well that was a huge failure but an instructive one; again, lesson learned (and it's actually crazy how much even a guided 5 meditation in the morning alters my basic instincts for the rest of the day about when i want to Scroll). i didn't floss........ i should floss.

i did okay with doing Life Tasks semi-regularly and the attitude of "20 minutes Task Time per day" was helpful in some ways but didn't address the Giant Ever Growing Backlog Of Tasks I Have Been Putting Off For Months To Years, which suggests a need for a new approach; this year i'm gonna try a tip i read somewhere to plan out your tasks on a weekly basis, including scheduling them, not just throwing them on a "weekly to-do list," and aim for 5 a week. i gave up on 20 minutes of digital tidying per day and i think the answer there is just to not set a minimum above the minimum, so to speak. if i delete 5 emails or unsubscribe from 1 thing that counts.

i don't know how i wound up doing with my goal to have One Human Connection Per Day (At Least Half The Days Of The Year) but i had a lot of fun this year and i am finishing it feeling in many ways still awkward and neurotic but more connected and secure than i was a year ago, and feeling almost overwhelmed with how true it feels to say "my life is full of doing fun stuff with people i like" after all the years i spent convinced this was completely impossible for me to achieve. this year i don't think i'm going to slot this into my daily habits, partly because sometimes multiple things happen on one day or i text someone to initiate plans-making on the same day someone texts me, partly because the advice i saw about doing stuff also recommend task-batching and i think there may be some utility to that here as well, and partly because well i do have a schedule that is incredibly variable by week and season and this past fall for example i'm not sure i could have handled much more in september/october than free store + one fun thing a week which is more or less how it shook out for a while there. i also don't think i'm going to set a number because, well, i feel good about it right now. i do want to set a non-quantifiable intention to keep getting a little braver about forging new connections or deepening ones that are shallow but seem promising (serial killer way to say "making friends" sorry i am still in some ways quite Insane about this topic, the prime locus of my insanity for many years), and within that specifically to keep getting better at going to local stuff even when none of my closest local friends are going to be there as my security blanket lol. this year early on i finally texted someone i knew from pantry biz with whom i had exchanged mutual "we should hang out sometime" sentiments and it turns out that they're one of those people where once someone else makes the first move they welcome you in a lot so that the "hey, wanna catch a movie or something?" text i sent while deep breathing (because i am Insane) wound up leading pretty directly to a bunch of other incredibly fun 2024 memories, which is like almost irritatingly on the nose as a life lesson but otherwise very nice. relatedly (to texting that stresses me out because of my Problems) i want to get better at texting people back in a timely fashion and also at being more impulsive in a positive way about sending texts when people are on my mind.

the two things i feel real regret over this year are the reading thing and also writing... not a great year for writing, although i can at least look back on i would say three newsletters i'm proud of and one fic i was very glad to complete. i also did... okay... at contributing at the singles jukebox now that We're So Back on a monthly schedule. but i wrote basically nothing other than the occasional blurb after sometime in may and that feels bad and also suggests i need to find some way to integrate writing more reliably into my routine. i don't want to set a word count goal because part of what's going on is that i have some projects i'm picking away at that are more demanding of planning & brainstorming & slower more considered writing than my usual (beloved!) genres of Blogging and Fanfiction but i do think it needs to be quantifiable because ummm otherwise i simply will Not. so i am thinking this is a daily goal too. same goes for reading and in that case i do think i can set an outcome goal, which is 50 books.

ok well i guess this wound up being a year in review post anyway lmao. whatever it's capricorn season it's my time to shine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! neatened up resolutions post for my own ease of reference incoming shortly

[thefirstknife]

New article with more details (from Jason Schreier who first broke the story). If you can't see it, I'll copy the whole text under read more.

About 100 employees were laid off in total (8%) and one of the main reasons listed is "underperformance," "sharp drop in popularity" and "poor reception of Lightfall."

So you know when for the last year and a half content creators have been shitting and pissing on the game as a full-time job and the amount of negativity and ragebait content became the only thing to make content about for them? Well they certainly won't take the blame, but I will let it be known. These people either don't understand the influence they have or they do and they're doing it on purpose, and I don't know which of these two options is worse, but I am 100% confident that their campaign of rage and hate contributed to this.

You don't base your entire community around constantly hating everything about the only game you play (despite clearly not enjoying it anymore) and somehow avoid galvanising thousands and thousands of people into perceiving the game negatively. Imagine being employees who have barely worked there for 2 years and the only community reception they've seen is 24/7 hate train for their work and then they get fired because of "poor reception" and "drop in popularity." How can they not take that personally? I am absolutely devastated for these people who delievered a banger product and who were met with an unrelenting barrage of toxic gamer children which ended up having more sway over their boss than them.

Which brings me to the next bit and that's FUCK THE CEO. He is now my mortal enemy #1. I am projecting psychic blasts directly into his brain. What an absolute spineless coward who is more willing to bow down to fucking gamers than to protect his own employees. This is absolutely rage inducing because this has happened before. From the article from 2021 about the toxic culture at Bungie:

Reading this shit from the new article absolutely fucking sent me into blind rage because I immediately remembered this. Another instance of employees suffering because of comments on reddit. And because of toxic players. And proof that leadership is not protecting employees and is instead siding with players.

Match made in heaven. Asshole gamer content creators and asshole CEOs, all of whom sit at home on piles of money made from someone else's labour. I hope they all explode. None of the people that worked on this game deserve this.

Another article with an infuriating comment from the CEO:

In an internal town hall meeting addressing a Monday round of layoffs that impacted multiple departments, Bungie CEO Pete Parsons allegedly told remaining employees that the company had kept “the right people” to continue work on Destiny 2.

"Kept the right people." Really. Veteran composers weren't the right people? Die!

Bloomberg article in full:

Bungie’s decision to cut an estimated 100 jobs from its staff of about 1,200 followed dire management warnings earlier this month of a sharp drop in the popularity of its flagship video game Destiny 2. Just two weeks ago, executives at the Sony-owned game developer told employees that revenue was running 45% below projections for the year, according to people who attended the meeting. Chief Executive Officer Pete Parsons pinned the big miss on weak player retention for Destiny 2, which has faced a poor reception since the release of its latest expansion, Lightfall. The next expansion, The Final Shape, was getting good — not great feedback — and management told those present that they planned to push back the release to June 2024 from February, according the people, who asked not to be identified because they weren’t authorized to speak publicly. The additional time would give developers a chance to improve the product. In the meantime, Parsons told staff Bungie would be cutting costs, such as for travel, as well as implementing salary and hiring freezes, the people said. Everyone would have to work together to weather the storm, he said, leaving employees feeling determined to do whatever was needed to get revenue back up. But on Monday morning the news got worse: Dozens of staffers woke up to mysterious 15-minute meetings that had been placed on their calendars, which they soon learned were part of a mass layoff. Bungie laid off around 8% of its employees, according to documentation reviewed by Bloomberg. Bungie didn’t respond to requests for comment. Employees who were let go will receive at least three months of severance and three months of Bungie-paid COBRA health insurance, although other benefits, such as expense reimbursements, ended Monday, sending some staff racing to submit their receipts. Laid-off staffers will also receive prorated bonuses, although those who were on a vesting schedule following Sony Group Corp.’s acquisition of Bungie in January 2022 will lose any shares that weren’t vested as of next month. The layoffs are part of a larger money-saving initiative at Sony’s PlayStation unit, which has also cut employees at studios such as Naughty Dog, Media Molecule and its San Mateo office. TD Cowen analyst Doug Creutz wrote in a report Monday that “events over the last few days lead us to believe that PlayStation is undergoing a restructuring.” PlayStation president Jim Ryan announced last month that he plans to resign. Many of the layoffs at Bungie affected the company’s support departments, such as community management and publishing. Remaining Bungie staff were informed that some of those areas will be outsourced moving forward.

[altraviolet]

Thank you @spicedrobot for the template! (template HERE)

My stats are kinda wonky because Echo Garden took 4 years to write but since it ended in 2024, all its stats go towards 2024's totals.

Other than TEG, I only wrote 2* other fics and I love them all equally tbh so I chose Nucleus Memory simply because it isn't TEG and was a really fun big bang with Sync :)

The numbers for the fics at the bottom are total comments and total bookmarks (AO3 distinguishes between comment threads vs total comments and public bookmarks vs total (public + private) bookmarks so I went with total for both).

*I also wrote my secret solenoid fic but it won't be published until tomorrow which means it'll count towards 2025's stats!

Long post!

This was a challenging year for many people, for sure! Personally, there were a lot of things that took away the energy/time I need to write. Family things (2 funerals and a wedding) and my day job (which is killing me, sometimes fast, sometimes slow). TEG ate my brain completely and so even though it ended in February, I haven't written very much since then. But I've decided to try to take a healthy view of this and not be mad that it's taking so long to recover xD but I do hope it hurries up! I had an initial goal to move on to original writing after TEG, but I think I'll try one more Really Big Fic as practice before doing so.

Since I only wrote 3 fics in 2024, I'll do a lil list of my thoughts:

The Echo Garden: massive fic! thanks so much to all the new readers and to everyone who's drawn art or left comments or rec'd it to new folks. it's astonishing to me that it's still drawing new readers :u I'm very happy overall with the fic. it was hard to write, sometimes, but I'll keep it positive here! there are so so so SO SO many posts about this fic, and comments, and the whole last chapter of it is a giant author's note with even more info. honestly I don't know what else to say about it that wouldn't either be a repeat of information or extremely long. it's very probable that if you're reading this post, it's because of TEG, so thank you for reading! :)

Nucleus Memory: reverse mini bang project with sync! they drew a pic and had a pitch, and I and another writer each wrote a fic about it! sync had some awesome ideas, I'm really happy I was selected to do their prompt. they did some beautiful art!! be sure to check it out if you haven't!

Bismuth: this fic was done for a Soundwave-centric zine! in Jan 2024 I read The Locked Tomb series and it had a big effect on my brain. this fic was an attempt to write something in an inspired style: disjointed, parallel timelines. scenes out of order. purposeful confusion to make the ending reveal rewarding. plus I got to jam another rarepair into the TF mire

In 2025 I hope to plan and post another big Rodimus/Soundwave fic, as well as any little idea that comes along, and also maybe participate in the TF big bang and secret solenoid events again! I'll probably abstain from zine events, but, I say that every time and then apply anyway xD

2020-2024 will always be the TEG years for me, and it's honestly strange to leave it behind. the 5 year anniversary of posting chapter 1 is in a couple months (holy moly :u) and that's wonderful and humbling. I don't think anything else I ever do will resonate so much with people, which is good in that I'm glad it gained such a happy audience and helped so many people. But it does make the idea of working on future fics to less reception a little less appealing.

There's nothing to do but keep going, though. I mean, the alternative is to not do anything? Nah. I do think unless another TF One style canon production drags a bunch more young people into the fandom, there probably will be a slow decline of new readers throughout 2025. Eventually it'll become less of a daily reminder for me, and it'll become more of a Past Thing and less of a Now Thing. If that doesn't make any sense, don't worry. It's like... idk. I get a lot of reminders of its existence every day. Which is fine! I think it'll peter off, though. And I'll work very hard again to make something to share, and I hope people will love it just as much =)

Anyway!!!!

Thanks for reading! I hope 2025 will be a very fun and productive year for all writers! 🎉✍️✨ That will mean so much good stuff for readers! Be sure to encourage your favs with comments!

Wishing you all the best in 2025!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I’m planning my 2025 UK (and, this time, Ireland) trip, and I’m really really excited about it. But as 2024’s come to an end and we all do retrospectives, I thought it would be interesting for me to look back on my 2024 UK trip now, and see what, with a few months of hindsight, still stands out as the best and worst parts.

Reasons why I’m making this list: 1) it’ll be helpful, when planning for next year’s trip, to know what cool things I want to repeat, and what uncool things I want to try to avoid, and 2) I miss my trip and want to mentally re-live it by making a list and looking at the pictures again.

My 2024 trip was divided into three overall parts. Part 1 was five days in London. Part 2 was taking trains – London to Edinburgh, Edinburgh to Glasgow, Glasgow to Fort William, stayed overnight in Fort William, then Fort William to Mallaig, Mallaig to Glasgow, Glasgow to Edinburgh. Then Part 3 was five days in Edinburgh for the festival.

Part 1: London

Best parts of London, listed in whatever order they occur to me

- Trains: There were so many trains. The stations were cool. The tracks were cool. The seats were cool. The vehicles were cool. The speed with which you could get around the city was cool. The “Mind the Gap” voice was cool.

I joked before I left on this trip that this is like the stereotype that says all autistic people are 8-year-old white boys obsessed with trains, and then there's a cute/inspiration porn story in the local paper about the little autistic boy who's all excited to meet a train conductor. I said I'll be like that when I go to Edinburgh and see all those comedy shows, because in this simile, I am an 8-year-old white boy and these are my trains.

Then, once I actually got there, I remembered that trains are also my trains. Some autistic stereotypes exist for a reason. For example, I am a 34-year-old autistic white woman, and I fucking love trains.

- Highgate Cemetery

So beautiful. I wandered around it for nearly an hour, just appreciating all the history. And it was really cool to see Douglas Adams' grave - I left two pens, from my dad and I, as we used to read his books together. I went there mainly because I was interested in Douglas Adams, but was amazed by how lovely the whole place was.

- Taskmaster house

Obviously that was cool as fuck. I also went on a walk by the river to where they have the bandstands where they did location tasks for the first few seasons. I took this picture by holding my phone up over a fence:

- Really good non-shawarma on park bench

A couple of years ago, I heard Nish Kumar recommend a specific Montreal shawarma place on The Bugle, because he performs in Montreal sometimes. I'd never been to that place, but I was a bit skeptical of his recommendation, because I've tried shawarma outside my own city, even in other big cities, and it's always terrible. My city has a lot of shawarma places, due to various factors that mean we have a high Arab immigrant population, so I've gotten used to quite a high standard of shawarma. I know several people who've grown up in Middle Eastern countries where shawarmas actually originated, and told me that our city has their favourite shawarmas in the world.

So, I wasn't sure about Nish Kumar's recommendation. Not because I thought there could be no good shawarma in Montreal (that's not where I live, but it's a big enough city so it'll have some good stuff, better than Toronto), but because I was not sure if I should trust someone from England to know how shawarma is meant to taste. I hear British people talk about kebabs a lot, but they never mentioned shawarmas, so I figured they don't really have shawarma there. Just kebabs, which are not the same thing.

Having said this, when I went to Montreal to see some Just For Laughs shows in 2023, I tried the shawarma place that Nish had recommended, and it tasted amazing. So I had to admit that maybe he does know what he's talking about. I told all this to my friend who lives in London, and when he went to a Nish Kumar gig long before my UK trip, he went up to Nish after the show, and asked what his favourite shawarma place in London is. Nish said some place called Kebab Kid, and I put that on my list of places to visit, to see if England does have good shawarma after all.

So I made a special trip out there. I traveled pretty far out of my way to get there. I took some trains, and then I walked about forty-five minutes, across quite a lovely neighbourhood, enjoying how pretty London is. I arrived at the restaurant, and became a touch concerned that the place I was using to prove to England does have shawarmas and not just kebabs, was called Kebab Kid. But when I went inside, they did have shawarmas on the menu. I ordered one.

The guy behind the counter asked me if I wanted chili sauce or barbeque sauce. I said no, because... obviously. Obviously you don't put those on a shawarma. He said, "So no sauce, then?", and I realized those weren't optional extras, they were the only sauce on offer. No garlic sauce, no hummus. I said... okay, barbeque then. He put misc. salad in there instead of pickles and turnips. It was so clearly not a shawarma. It came with fries, even though fries obviously do not go with shawarma.

Skeptically, I took it down the road and sat down on a park bench to eat. And God, was it ever delicious. It wasn't a shawarma. That's absolutely not what a shawarma is. But it was a very, very good chicken sandwich. A guy sat down next to me and chatted to me for a while. He asked what I was eating, I said a shawarma, and he said he's from Turkey and they don't have proper shawarmas here, not like at home. I said yes, I can see that. They absolutely don't.

But it was a really really good chicken sandwich and I ate it in a really pretty park, surrounded by pigeons, and had a genuinely nice chat with a random stranger, and it felt sweet and peaceful, and I liked it a lot.

I told myself I was going to keep each item on this list pretty short, just a couple of quick sentences to explain them. I did not expect the first list item to make me break that rule would be a shawarma place. I'm going back to the rule now.

- Sunday roast

I flew all Saturday night. I arrived at 8:30 AM. My wonderful hosts picked me up at the airport, I showered and changed and dropped my stuff off at their place, and then, while fuelled entirely by adrenaline and no sleep, I accompanied my friend from a British comedy message board, whom I'd just met in person for the first time, to a pub with a Sunday roast.

I've been informed that he chose this pub specifically because it has a great Sunday roast, they're not all as good as this one. But this one was very, very good. I had horseraddish for the first time. I had Yorkshire pudding for the first time. I was very surprised that this things called pudding was just bread, until I tasted it, and I decided that anything that delicious can call itself whatever it wants. It was the perfect way to start a trip.

- My wonderful hosts

It's weird to write this part because he'll probably read it. But I stayed in the spare room of a guy I'd met two years earlier on a comedy message board, as I've said many times, I cannot believe lucky I got in messaging a guy because I just wanted a few old comedy recordings, and ending up with a wonderful new friend (and more comedy recordings that I could have imagined, that's cool too). We spoke regularly for a couple of years before my trip to the UK, which is relevant because, as my dad pointed out, it's inadvisable to stay with a man from the internet you've not met in person, but if he's been talking to you most days for two years, that's a lot of work to put in just to lure someone to your house to murder them. There are easier ways to murder someone. So it's probably fine.

He did not murder me. He has a wife whom I'd not spoken to before but she was so incredibly nice; I'd been slightly concerned that she might be put out by having to play host to some woman from Canada whom she didn't know, but it wasn't like that at all, she was so friendly and welcoming, and so was her husband of course, it was super cool to meet him in person and spend time with both of them, it was great. And they had three cats who were the absolute best cats in the world. I won't post a picture of the cats here, because, you know, those are other people's private cats. But they were excellent cats.

- The Bill Murray, Nish Kumar

Many, many hours of my favourite comedy I've of my favourite comedy I've ever heard was recorded at The Bill Murray pub, for Angel Comedy. I was so excited to see the venue in person, and I was not disappointed. I saw a Nish Kumar WIP there just before he went to Edinburgh, and holy God, it was one of the best evenings of my life. I arrived at the pub an hour before the show, partly so I could awkwardly hang around the door to the comedy room and get the best seats (I achieved this, of course), and partly because I wanted to spend time in that building, to take in the history.

And it was full of history. The walls were covered in pictures of great comedians who've performed there. There were murals with drawings of comedy legends. And the actual comedy room was perfect - small and intimate, definitely good at those technical things that I don't have enough expertise to know how they work but I know good ones when I experience them (sight lines, acoustics, comedy-conducive lighting). And I watched Nish Kumar perform an absolutely fantastic version of one of my favourite stand-up hours ever. It was a perfect night.

- Crystal Palace

I spent one morning in Crystal Palace. I ate breakfast. It's a very very pretty neighbourhood with cool little buildings and a sense of history and everything that I romanticize, when I romanticize the UK. It had a big beautiful park with dinosaur statues. I went into a cool independent bookstore, which has hosted performances by some of my favourite comedians ever, and I bought a beautiful children's book to donate to the autism centre where I worked at the time. If I'm honest, those hours were the ones I most enjoyed in London, aside from the time at actual comedy shows/venues. I just wanted to have a look.

Pictured below: not a tourist attraction (according to Elis James, who is wrong), but some cool dinosaurs

- Cambridge

On one of my days in London, I got trains to Cambridge and back. At first I was pretty disappointed in the place, because it had so many tourists that I couldn't really appreciate anything. But then I paid about 10 pounds to get into the grounds of St. John's College, which had an entry fee because it was one of the extra beautiful colleges. It was also Douglas Adams' college, so I'd wanted to see it anyway for Britcom tourism reasons. But holy God, was it ever gorgeous. I felt like I was in some sort of unnamed British fantasy novel.

The gardens. The old buildings. The history. The picturesque rooftops, the river with boats punting by like a postcard. The stained glass in the chapel. The courtyards that seemed from another world. The pillars. This was exactly what I wanted when I said I wanted to go to the UK and see "Harry Potter buildings". Not filming locations from the movies, I don't care about that. Magestic buildings with fantasy novel vibes. Also, you know, all the genuine history there. Douglas Adams, and I hear the history of Cambridge University might even go back slightly further than the 1970s.

I also ate lunch at a pub called The Eagle, because it was called the oldest pub in Cambridge, and I think that's even true (as in, I didn't just wander into any pub that had a sign saying "oldest pub in Cambridge" outside, I looked this up beforehand). Because I like history. The pub was so cool on the inside, and yes I'm aware that that's probably not even because it's several hundred years old, it's because they made it look that way so they can trade off tourists like me. I know that - that any pub that's several hundred years old is a Theseus' Ship situation. I don't care, the pub was beautiful. And I had an amazingly delicious lunch there.

- Regent's Park

One of the first places I went when I got to London. So much amazing comedy history there. Pretty park, I enjoyed walking around the pretty park. But I mainly enjoyed looking at the theatre, even though we couldn't go in, and standing on the spot of some of my favourite nights in comedy history, it was fucking cool.

- ABC Comedy, Romesh Ranganathan

This is another very cool comedy club in London, where a lot of really really awesome comedy has happened over the years, I've gotten to experience a lot of it from Canada via the magic of technology but was so excited to be there in person. And I saw Romesh do an hour-long WIP there (I think it was less WIP, and more just messing around and saying whatever came up), which was really funny and a great time. Weird to see someone so famous in person. He was taller than I expected. His reputation is for the grumpy thing, but he's so funny when he says something silly and then gives the crowd a huge grin. It was loose and great fun.

And thought I'd been told before that it's a small room, I was amazed to see in person, and confirm how very small it is, giving how regular it is for big names to perform there (Romesh Ranganathan, for a start). Just like the Bill Murray.

- All the big pretty buildings in the Parliament area, and St. James' Park

I spent a few hours wandering around the big pretty buildings in the Parliament area and St. James' park. It was old and nice and impressive. I kept walking by Big Ben and saying "There's Big Ben!" like in that Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

- Square Mile neighbourhood and Leadenhall Market

Another time, I spent an afternoon wandering around a neighbourhood that I believe is called Square Mile. It had a lot of little alleyways, and I'm a sucker for little alleyways. It had big and impressive buildings that I enjoyed looking at. I went into a pub that had chandeliers.

That neighbourhood had Leadenhall Market in it, which is an exception to me not caring about places where the Harry Potter movies were filmed, because it's not just where they happened to film Diagon Alley the movie, it looks like how I pictured Diagon Alley in my head from the books. There were a bunch of little market areas like this in London, which I liked. But this one was my favourite:

- Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese pub

I spent nearly three hours in this pub. I ordered several alcohol-free Guinesses, because I was trying to stay away from alcohol throughout the trip. I was there by myself. So why did I spent three hours in a pub, if not for the alcohol or the company? It was just one of the coolest buildings I'd been in and I wanted to be in there for longer. I was in a basement room where I couldn't even get internet, so I couldn't even browse on my phone. I just sat there, for hours, alone in the room, and it was fantastic.

The pub had several different rooms, as you move downstairs, and one of the rooms was totally empty so I sat down there. This definitely sated my desire to see the other type of Harry Potter building - rather than the big and majestic ones that could be a wizard castle, this was a dimly lit basement that looks like it hasn't been updated since the 1600s, which is apparently when this pub was built. Knockturn Alley. Okay I'm done with the Harry Potter references (to be clear I did not, and would not, do any official Harry Potter stuff that could generate profit for the author because fuck her - I didn't even do any unofficial Harry Potter stuff like the Edinburgh tours or pictures with that Kings Cross cart - I just wanted to sit around in old buildings and feel like I was in a fantasy novel).

This gave me the thing I wanted to find in tourist attractions, but didn't. I visited some large old cathedrals, and wanted to feel a sense of history and magic and the gravity of a place like that, but it was packed with other tourists taking pictures, so I couldn't get into it. I sat in St. Paul's Cathedral trying to feel magic, and finally said to myself, "Yeah, God's not here" and left (metaphorical God, I'm not religious, but I'm often impressed with the weight of human wonder that goes into religious architecture). I found the Cheshire Cheese just after that, sat down in that old building, and felt all the stuff that I'd wanted to feel in the church but failed.

I'm genuinely glad there was no internet signal down there, because I took out my phone, and did write a whole big Tumblr post in my notes app, figuring I'd post it when I got back upstairs (okay, I didn't just stare at the wall for three hours). That magic of the building overtook me. That post was so incredibly cheesy, even for me. It contained the line "I didn't find God in a church, but then I found God in a pub," because apparently I thought I was John Robins now. And that's one of the less cheesy lines, since I'm willing to share it now. I think there were a bunch of reflections in there about struggling with my drinking problem, but written in ways that only made sense while sitting in that room. The rest of the post will be thankfully lost because I got upstairs, returned to the real word, said "this is bullshit" and deleted it. But I hope that this year, I can go back to the magical pub where the real world doesn't exist.

- Other pubs

I didn't drink at all in the UK (okay, I had one beer in a pub by the ocean on my last day in Edinburgh, but literally only one pint), and it wasn't the first time in my adult life that I've gone two whole weeks without alcohol, but it was the first time I've done that and found it easy, because things were going so well that I didn't even miss it. I did, however, drink a lot of alcohol-free Guinesses. Because I sat in a lot of pubs and wanted something that at least made me feel like I was drinking.

The worst part of London was the heat and the crowds and the fact that everyone moves so fast that you're not allowed to stand still for half a second without people getting angry at you for blocking the sidewalk, and there weren't a lot of options for refuge from that. A lot of the restaurants seemed to be takeaway-only, or just a few tables, and were always packed. So a lot of times, I found myself ducking into pubs to get out of the heat and the crowds. The pubs were old and nice and quiet and comforting, and I enjoyed sitting in them a lot.

- Egg Sluts

Okay, I'm going to change the tone a bit from the darker, drinking problem-based stuff. I had a fucking excellent breakfast sandwich in a place called Egg Sluts. I did not take a picture, but it was so good that I have to go back there in 2025. I'm a big fan of the egg + meat-based breakfast sandwich, and that was probably the best one I'd ever had.

- Sausage rolls

The first time I ordered a sausage roll from Gregg's, I did it while giggling about how I feel like a character in a story that was told on a panel show. The WILTY people are always making up stuff about Gregg's and sausage rolls. What a cute British thing to do. I'm going to eat a sausage roll on a train. This is so British.

The second, through, by my best estimation, 504th time that I ordered a sausage roll in Britain, I thought, "Fucking hell, am I ever glad we don't have these in Canada. I don't think I'd have lived to this age if I had the option to order them all the time. Sausage... in bread... it's brilliant. Why didn't we think of this in Canada? We must never think of this in Canada. This needs to remain a treat abroad."

- Lamb being a common food there

Here, it's a delicacy, often not available in places that serve the more common meats like chicken, pork, and beef. Some places offer it, but for a higher price than the same dish with another meat. Britain just puts lamb in everything.

- On a similar note, one day I went up to the roof of a high building and ate a lamb kebab while looking out at the entire city, and that was very nice:

- The Soho Theatre

Same deal as the other comedy venues - cool place full of comedy history, I've heard so much stuff from there and loved getting to see it in person and physically be in that space. Also, the walls were full of posters from shows that had performed there over the years.

- The London Underground when it was not packed with people

Fun stuff. Sometimes it was all dark and felt like a sci-fi movie. The cars made fun noises and went fast.

- I saw Daniel Kitson live twice, a couple of nights apart. One of the times, I met him after the show. My brain shut down and I forgot all the words in the English language and he stood there looking at me and I couldn't speak to him. He performed what I think is one of the best shows he's ever done, and I got to see it live, and that was cool as fuck. So incredibly cool. But oh my God, I felt terrible later that night (and the next day, and the next few days) when I realized how badly I'd Got It Wrong when I met him.

It's okay though, because I did eventually manage to look at the pictures my friend took, and those pictures confirmed that he at least found the situation amusing (I could not confirm that at the time as I was physically unable to look at him):

Worst parts of London, listed in whatever order they occur to me

- The British Library

It might be unfair to call this one of the worst parts of my trip to London, because it was still pretty cool. But most of London was good, so by the standards of that, this was… weird. I went on the day I arrived, right after the Sunday roast, when I’d flown all night and not slept in well over 24 hours by then, so that definitely did not help. I took a guided tour of the place, and the tour was super weird. Our guide was obsessed with telling us that the government had secretly killed Alan Turing. Every part of the tour was basically a way for him to bring it back to that subject. Which almost sounds like a gimmick, but the guy seemed quite serious about it. He also told us several facts that other people on the tour pointed out were incorrect (not just the conspiracy theory thing, but factual stuff like confidently mis-labelling what language certain books were in). The whole thing was just weird, and the fact that I was reaching “asleep on my feet” territory made it feel like a weird drug trip.

- The heat

I realized a few months before the trip that this would be taking place in the middle of summer, and I need to factor in how much I cannot stand being outside in the middle of summer. I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it. My body cannot stand excessive heat. I am meant to live in Arctic temperatures. Where I live now, the weather has been mostly between -10 and -20 degrees Celcius for the last few weeks, and that's about where I feel comfortable. As soon as it starts going above 0, I don't like it.

London in the summer was well above 0. To be fair, it was slightly less hot there than it was at home. I was told that I was there during one of their heat waves, but even their heat wave temperatures were not quite as hot as what I get at home on a regular mid-summer week. So that would normally be nice. But at home, I'm not usually walking outside all day, for several days in a row, in the middle of summer. I'm usually hiding in my house with a fan blowing directly on me and cold wash clothes draped all over my body, telling myself that autumn will come soon.

So. Summer tourism might not be the best call for me. I got very miserable being in the heat for so long, and that made everything else harder to deal with. The crowds. The blisters on my feet. I could stand them all more easily if my body were not in horrible pain from the elevated temperatures, dealing with the sensory nightmare of sweat everywhere. Not to get too graphic or anything.

- The crowds

Oh my God, the crowds in London. I already covered most of this when I wrote about crowds before, but fucking hell, it was bad. The whole sidewalk. I'd often been surprised when I saw people on panel shows talk about how much they hate people who stop walking on a sidewalk ("pavement"). "Why don't you just go around them?" I wondered. Well now I know why - you can't! You can't go around them. There is no area of foot traffic that's not full of people. I think it was the lack of ability to stop moving that bothered me even more than just the proximity to so many people, but both were bad. And worse in the heat.

- I got awful blisters all over the bottoms of both feet on my first day there, and they didn't start to heal until after I'd left London

I still don't know why this happened. I mean, obviously it was because I was walking around all day as a tourist. But I had a job at the time where I was on my feet all day, so it's not like I wasn't used to some of that. I had good shoes. New enough to still be good, old enough to be broken in. I think I'm maybe just not used to walking on paved surfaces for so long. They were hard on my feet.

The blisters started to get better when I spent a couple of days on the trains to and around Scotland - got off my feet for nearly two straight days, just sitting in the train seats. Also, at the Edinburgh train station, I "bought some plasters from Boots", which I found to be an amusingly British thing to do. Those helped. So it wasn't such a problem when I was walking all around Edinburgh.

But for those five days in London, I couldn't put weight on either foot without it being in terrible pain, and obviously that's not ideal for an holiday where I walk around a city all day. The worst was in Cambridge, as I walked around that utterly beautiful St. John's College, and kept thinking... I wish I could be here without it causing excruciating pain to the bottoms of my feet. Then I could enjoy it more.

I need to look up good preventative blister stuff before I got back in 2025. At the very least, I'll bring some Band-Aids ("plasters") with me this time and put them on when it first starts.

On the best-of list, I put pictures of each bullet point. Be grateful that I'm not doing that here. Because I did take a picture of them one day, so I could have a record of how bad they got (seriously - the ran all the way across). But I'll spare the public that.

- Covent Gardens

Oh my God, I hated that place. I planned to spend a few hours there because there was so much touristy stuff that I figured I should see, but it was awful, for the reasons I've already outlined. Heat, and no escape from it. Giant crowds. Blisters on the bottoms of my feet. Walking around this busy square.

I went to get a something from my UK trip pictures folder to put here, but it turns out I didn't take any pictures in Covent Gardens. I was so miserable that at no point did I think "I want to save this for posterity". I'm not doing that place again.

- Buckingham Palace guard changing

The palace itself was cool to look at, but if I went back there again, it wouldn't be when they change the guard. It turns out the Buckingham Palace guard are just Mounties. We have Mounties at home. It was a bunch of guys dressed as Mounties doing the guard-changing routine that the Mounties in Canada do, but with fucking thousands of people gathered all over the square and the streets so you couldn't get anywhere near it to actually see. It might have been cool if I'd been able to get near it - I enjoy watching the Mounties do their thing sometimes. But I'd rather just go look at the pretty Palace sometime when it's not so full of people.

- St. Paul's Cathedral, Westminster Cathedral

I was looking forward to this stuff because as I've said, I like that kind of architecture. But the number of tourists meant that vibe-wise, it felt more like a very fancy shopping mall than the site of centuries worth of humans trying to connect to the Divine.

- The London Underground when it was packed with people

Extremely uncomfortable, do not recommend.

- The show I saw at the Soho Theatre

It wasn't very good.

I was going to add parts 2 and 3 of my trip on the end here, but this post has got too long, and I know Tumblr has a limit to the number of pictures you're allowed to add in one post. So I'll just post this one now, and then I'll add the other parts in a reblog later. This has been a fun exercise in remembering stuff.

[ezziefae]

Things I'm excited to see in The Prisoner's Throne (March 2024)

I still can’t believe we have to wait till march 2024 for prisoner throne, y’all don’t understand the amount of excitement I have about going back to the world of Elfhame and seeing my favorite beloved characters. Here’s a list of some things I’m really looking forward to see or find out.

Taryn’s Child

Like we’re finally going to meet Taryn’s Child (who I’m assuming is a boy), I wonder if Holly Black has any plans of making them a big part of this book or if she has any plans of writing a separate book with the focus on Taryn’s kid.

Oak’s POV

Holly Black confirmed that we will see Oak's perspective of Elfhame, which wasn't discussed in TSH due to Wren's POV. From my understanding, there’s a lot of problems in Elfhame that we still don’t know about. All of the unknown will finally be revealed in Prisoners Throne, and that’s sooooo exciting!

Jude and Cardan

Its obviously very clear that everyone who is a fan of TFOTA series is very excited to see how the King and Queen of Elfhame are doing!!

I am very excited to learn more about Jude and Cardan. They have been together for around 9 years since the time of The Queen Of Nothing. I am eager to see what challenges they have faced during this time and how their relationship has progressed. We will not be reading about their teenage years, but rather their adult years. I am looking forward to seeing how Holly has portrayed their growth and transformation !!!! LIKE HELLO, MATURE CARDAN AND JUDE?? I just know both are going to give DILF and MILF energy, Jurdan fans will not survive. I will not survive.

Taryn and The Ghost?

It's possible that this book will give us insight into whether Taryn and the Ghost are romantically involved. In TQON, there were some hints that The Ghost had feelings for Taryn. It's worth remembering that Taryn saved The Ghost and they were both victims of Locke's abuse.

Some people don't think the Ghost and Taryn should be together because they find it strange. They have two main reasons for this. One is that the Ghost is about 100 years older than Taryn. The other reason is that some people don't think Taryn is good enough for the Ghost. (People don't like Taryn. Do I blame them? of course not)

Any opinions of this? I have a feeling that the ghost might of become overprotective of Taryn and owes her debt for saving his life. Could they be romantically involved? Maybe, we’ll have to wait and see!

Wren’s Family

In some way Wren will finally reunite with her human family. How?…i have no idea with the nature than the stolen heir ended in. But i’m excited to see how that goes, Wren deserves her happiness. It will probably be emotional, i’ll probably cry.

Jude, Cardan and the idea of having children?

OKAY!! I made a seperate post about this months ago (if you haven’t read it, please do!! click here)

Opinions on whether Jude and Cardan should become parents are divided among fans. Personally, I wouldn't be opposed to the idea. It's important to remember that Jude and Cardan are now adults and have grown since the last time we saw them.

Holly Black has already confirmed that Jude and Cardan are aware of the idea of having children. “they are all aware of it, it will be talked about more in Prisoners Throne”

Flowers blooming in Mab’s grave have fans speculating and making theories that Jude could be possibly pregnant.

According to Holly, it would be complicated for many people if Jude and Cardan had children. This is because if they did, Oak would be removed from the throne line. However, if Oak were to become the King of Elfhame, any children that Jude and Cardan have would also be cut from the line.

I still don't see why Jude and Cardan having kids would be complicated, I think it would make perfect sense. Oak wouldn't have to rule, and Jude and Cardan could keep their Power.

We’ll see where Holly goes with this in Prisoner's Throne.

Oak becoming King of Elfhame?

Okay soooo, Oak has already stated that he does not want to be King of Elfhame, we’ve known this since the beginning of TFOTA.

If Oak were to become king, Jude and Cardan would be forced to relinquish their throne and all of their power. Personally, I would prefer that Jude and Cardan maintain their position. The people adore Cardan and are terrified of Jude, which has been their longstanding desire. I don't want them to lose it all just so that Oak can take the throne.

There’s been theories that Oak will become the King of the Court of Teeth along side Wren. But that’s the part that confuses me, Wren never wanted to become queen, neither does Oak. So i’m wondering how that’s gonna work.

Oak and his sisters

I’m excited to see them all together again. Vivi, Taryn, Jude, and Oak. Holly did say something about how the the siblings dynamic will be important in Prisoner’s Throne. UGH I MISS THEM.

Madoc, The Traitor of Elfhame

With the ending events of TSH, i’m curious to see what’s gonna happen to Madoc. I soooo doubt Jude will forgive him. Madoc is known to be a traitor, If Madoc's exile is lifted back by Jude and Cardan, it may not be well-received by the folk. It will not look good for Jude and Cardan. Will Madoc betray them again? will he fight against Jude? or will he reedeem himself?

Tiernan and Hyacinth.

Soooo this is very ANGSTY. Tiernan and Hyacinthe were in a relationship, but things fell apart when Madoc betrayed Elfhame. Tiernan remained loyal to Elfhame, while Hyacinthe joined Madoc, turning them from lovers to enemies.

To make matters worse, Hyacinthe later became loyal to Wren, who is a new enemy to Elfhame. (Things do not look good for Hyacinthe). This turn of events is quite tragic, and it leaves us wondering how they will resolve their conflicts. So it’s TRAGIC, and i wonder how they’re going to resolve it all. Like where the hell do they go from there??? HOLLLYY TELL USSSS

The Undersea

It was repeated throughout the entirety of the book that the undersea is in chaos. Queen Orlagh is not doing well, and Nicasia is too weak. Will they be dethroned? Will Jude and Cardan be involved? (I'm guessing they will)

Jude’s Political Problem

I made a seperate post about this, click here to see.

. Holly has confirmed in a livestream that Jude will have a political problem by the End of Prisoners Throne. She didn’t say Jude AND Cardan…no, she said only Jude's name. So….MISS HOLLLY BLACK WHY ARE U TORTURING US. i'm dying to know what the problem will be.

(Id also like to point out that I think holly might’ve accidentally spoiled the fact that Jude and Cardan will still be king and queen of Elfhame by the end of prisoners throne)

Wren’s Magical Powers

Wren is a scary woman now, and she’s POWERFUL. Is she more powerful than Jude and Cardan? maybe? i hope not, but maybe. She was able to “kill” her abusive mother by speaking it into EXISTENCE. WTF. Have mercy Wren!

How Elfhame will approach Wren

Our girl Wren has made Elfhame her enemy by making the ONLY heir to Elfhame her prisoner. It’s obvious Jude will be furious, not just with Wren but with Oak. For going against her and Cardan’s orders of saving Madoc. Will Elfhame go to war? will Jude be angry at herself for freeing Wren in TQON?

Lady Asha

So, I'm assuming she still lives in the palace along side Jude and Cardan. Although I wouldn't be surprised if Jude kicked her out and sent her away. This lady is a B*tch. I'm curious to know what Lady Asha has been up to or rather what she's been scheming.

WHY DID JUDE KICK WREN OUT OF THE PALACE OF ELFHAME??

(Note: Jude is so petty for this, although I believe there is more to this than we might currently know, maybe Jude didnt do it, maybe it was Oriana or Lady Asha)

It was revealed that Jude ordered her guards to remove Wren from the palace. but WHY?? Why didn’t Oak intervene? Why did jude do it?

In TQON, Jude suggested to Oak that if he decided to wed Suren, then she could reside in the palace with them. This implies that Jude was comfortable with Suren living along side them in Elfhame. SOOO IM CONFUSED!!! I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS! and I want ANSWERS HOLLY BLACK !

Family Reunion: Oriana, Madoc, Oak, Taryn, Jude and Vivi.

Jude lives in the palace, while Madoc has been exiled and captured. Taryn has a kid and lives in Locke’s estates, Vivi lives in the mortal world with Heather. It's evident that they have gone their separate ways. It’s not TCP chapter 1 anymore, where they all eat dinner together and play games.

i have to be honest and say that i miss them together. and so does Oriana. In TSH she admitted to missing and wishing they were all together again. I hope to see some kind of reunion.

"I know," She [Oriana] said. "I cannot hope for one side to win neither. I used to wish that Madoc never went looking for those girls, and now all I wish is that we could be together again as we once were." (TSH, Chap 3, pg 55)

Locke’s Father

Holly has said many times that she wanted to do something about Locke’s Father (Yes, he’s still alive) I wonder if he’ll be introduced in this book.

Vivi and Wren

Wren was very hurt when Vivi stated she wanted wren away from oak in TQON. I want to see them together, maybe Vivi will apologize. Maybe they’ll become besties.

i hope they do, they just HAVE TO.

-

I’ll probably make a part 2. But what are you guys excited to see?

[scarletwinterxx]

please write more of dad!jisung 🥹🥹🥹

helllooo~ i actually got a few dad jisung requests , apologies it took this long but I finally wrote it😊 hope you like it!

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.Keep reading

"What if she cries?"

"Then do something about it?"

"Okay but what do I do?"

You look over your boyfriend and the baby girl in his arms, both looking at you with curiosity in their eyes. "Jisung, that's your daughter. You kept her alive for this long, you'll figure it out"

"Pretty sure we made it this far because of you. You're the brain in this relationship"

Jiwon babbles like she's the one talking to her father, this makes Jisung look down at the baby girl in his arms. Leaning down to boop their noses together, something he knows his daughter loves.

"Stop talking yourself out of getting groceries, it's only a few things and I really need to clean the house, your parents are coming over" you tell him as you put a few things inside her diaper bag, just the essentials incase she needs them while they're out.

When you got pregnant with Jiwon, you admit you felt lost. You and Jisung were still very young. You just turned 20 when you found out, everything that could go wrong already playing in your mind. The only one who talked some sense into you was your boyfriend. Jisung was the voice of reason during that time, he really stepped up and made sure you were taken care of.

First agenda on his list was to get a place for the two of you, the apartment wasn't too big but enough for your small family. The two of you worked remotely so it was perfect when the little one came.

Now your daughter is a year old, she's everything the two of you dreamed of. And even though she came a little earlier than planned, Park Jiwon is the light of both your universe's.

Jisung loved the little human with everything he is, his favorite part is that she looks like you in every way. He must have saved a nation in his past life to be blessed like this, living with the love of his life and the little life the two of you created.

"Here's a bag just in case she needs anything, she got snacks in there. Also packed some for you" you joked, putting the bag on his shoulder.

You laugh as you watch the 6 foot guy holding a pink bag and a baby with the biggest pink bow, "You two are adorable, now go I have some cleaning up to do"

"Wish me luck" he mumbles, giving you a kiss on the forehead before walking towards the front door

"Hey, when someone comes up you and says 'oh my gosh, you're baby's so cute' what do you say?" you call out to him

He rolls his eyes, a smile forming on his lips "She looks just like her momma"

"Damn right she does, now go. Love you both, see you later"

[benkyoutobentou]

12 Books for 2024 (Japanese Edition)

You may have seen my post about the twelve books I read in 2023 (here), and I thought it would be fun to follow it up with a little tbr for 2024! Ideally, I'd like to read more than twelve books in 2024, but twelve is enough for now since I've got some series on this list that I'd like to either make some serious progress in or finish up completely. This list is in no particular order!

地球星人 - 村田沙耶香: I read コンビニ人間 by Murata a few years back and loved it, and this one has been high up on my tbr for a long time now. With how many people say they're completely traumatized by it, it sounds like the perfect book for me. The only reason I haven't read this yet is because I've hyped it up so much for myself.

生命式 - 村田沙耶香: A short story collection by Murata? Sign me up ten times over. This one sounds weird and gruesome and right up my alley.

本を守ろうとする猫の話 - 夏川草介: Another cat book, who can blame me? This was also touted as being perfect for book lovers, and I haven't heard a bad review yet.

吾輩は猫である - 夏目漱石: Keeping with the cat theme, this one I actually have planned in tandem with a challenge I have to read twelve big ass classics throughout the year. Between the sheer size of this and the fact that the text is so densely packed in, this book kinda scares me. I'm planning to read it in December of next year so that I have as much time as possible to prepare haha.

世界から猫が消えたなら - 川村元気: Last cat book, I promise, but I had to keep them all together (it's actually not about cats, though). I've had this one for a long time and just picked it up on a whim. I've heard a bit of mixed reviews, but the premise sounds interesting enough, and it seems to be pretty popular.

博士の愛した数式 - 小川洋子: This was one of the first books I bought in Japanese, so it's high time that I get it off my tbr. I've seen so many people love this, in and out of the language learning community. This author also has a bunch of other popular works, so I'd really like to jump into her books and experience the hype for myself.

告白 ‐ 湊かなえ: I've seen a bit of buzz about this book in the language learning community, but what really convinced me on it was seeing people outside of language learners also enjoying it. It sounds dark and mildly depressing, and I'm hoping that it'll have some interesting commentary as well.

独り舞 - 李琴峰: Somehow, I haven't read any queer literary fiction in Japanese yet, despite it being my favorite genre, so I'm so excited to jump into this one. For the life of me I can't remember where I heard about this, but I think it'll be one of my first reads in 2024.

デゥラララ！！- 成田良悟: I used to be obsessed with the anime adaptation in middle school but never revisited the series out of fear that it wouldn't stand the test of time. After seeing a fellow language learner gush about the series, I decided to give it a shot, managed to find it at a local used bookstore, and snatched up the first volume. Don't let me down, nostalgia!

憎らしい彼 - 凪良ゆう: This is the second book in the 美しい彼 series, and even though I'd like to read the third one next year as well, I'm just combining them. Seeing this series next to series like No. 6 and キノの旅 I'm really grateful to have a trilogy on my tbr haha.

No. 6 - あさのあつこ: Saying that I would like to finish this series next year is a bit of a stretch, seeing as I have eight of ten volumes left, but I'd like to put a serious dent in it to be sure.

キノの旅 - 時雨沢恵一: This series is more of a read as I please type series for me, since there's not really any overarching plot. I'm also not racing to make progress, since there are over twenty volumes (and still going). I'm savoring this series and I'm okay with that.