#jisung au

[godslino]

IN BLOOM | jisung first date series. second chance lovers.

pairing: jisung x fem!reader word count: 13.2k genre: childhood friends au, angst, fluff, songwriter!jisung, florist!reader warnings: swearing, minor character death, grief/loss (nothing to do with any of the members!) summary: it's february. the tulips are in bloom. jisung is back.

chan | minho | changbin | hyunjin | jisung | felix | seungmin | jeongin · · · ♡ series masterlist · · · ♡ taglist · · · ♡

a/n: *taps mic* hello?? is this thing on?? oh good. yes. hi. hello! it's been a while, as most of you can tell. thank you all SO MUCH for sticking around. if you've been reading my asks you'll know that march and april were rough months for me personally. shout out to my anons and mutuals who kept my spirits high and made my days brighter. uhhh, this was originally supposed to be a stand alone fic but i figured hey, what the hell, and made it into jisung's first date chapter. it's pretty heavy stuff. lots of feelings, lots of love. i hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it! again, thank you so much for waiting for me. i'll be back soon with more updates! all the love <3

also thank you kenzie for being such a light during all of this. i hope all my screaming in your messages was worth it!

“All of these had to be pulled.” Hyunjin huffs, dropping a few crates just past the doorway. 

“Again?” you ask, hands on your hips as you stare at yet another wasted supply. “I don’t understand, they sold so well last year.”

Hyunjin gives you a sad smile. “It’ll pick up eventually, don’t worry. I mean the holidays just finished and business usually slows down in the months after anyways.”

He’s being sincere, you know that. But there’s a part of you that also knows it’s a lot more than just the usual ebb and flow of sales. He’s being nice for your sake.

“Maybe we could try coming up with other ideas?” he suggests, because Hyunjin is nothing if not kind. Always willing, always finding a way.

He moves past you to grab a fresh pair of gloves. The ones he’s wearing are dirty, pollen-stained and ripped at the edges. 

“You’ve always been really good at basket arrangements. We could try to make some for Valentine's Day. Different sizes, maybe? The big ones will probably do well for online orders since they’re more optimal for things like office deliveries and stuff like that.”

You hum in approval. “True. I mean, I was kind of worried we would have to skip out on deliveries this year since we don’t have the manpower to handle all of that, but I think Jeongin’s been looking to pick up hours around here again. He said something about his program giving them a month of independent study, so he’ll be home for a bit.” you say, scribbling down a reminder in your notebook. “I could ask him to help with driving the truck in his free time?”

Hyunjin lights up– he always does when Jeongin is mentioned. 

It’s been a lot quieter ever since he left for college. There were so many tears and so many hugs that were met with countless 'you guys are dramatic's in return. But it’s hard to not feel sad when people leave town; when they decide the borders lined with apple trees and rice fields aren’t enough to stop their dreams from blooming into more than what’s capable of being pursued here.

That, unsurprisingly, is something you know all too well.

“Can’t believe he’s driving.” Hyunjin laments as he wipes his floral scissors with a rag. “I used to spend my days changing his diapers and spoon feeding him redbulls– but now? Driving? My baby is all grown up.” he fake sniffles. “By the way, I’m gonna take my fifteen after I’m done snipping these tulips.”

You snort, bending down to take the crates of wilted flowers to the back for disposal. Hyunjin moves to help but you shake him off.

“Sounds good. Also, don’t let Innie hear you say that. I’m about a thousand percent sure he has the strength needed to throw you into the dumpster with one arm now.”

“My baby would never do that to me!” Hyunjin calls out as you round the corner, bumping open the back door with your hip. 

February brings a lot of rain in Jeju. Today is no different; fat drops landing on your head as soon as you stumble out into the alley behind the shop. Footsteps heavy on wet brick, you curse under your breath as you run as fast as you can to the dumpster.

There’s still a few supply boxes from yesterday’s shipment laying around. You meant to bring them in, but you were so exhausted that it slipped your mind while you struggled to make sure everything inside the shop was figured out.

Scrambling, you haul them in one by one, shoes squeaking against the floor as you alternate in and out, soggy cardboard pressed against the front of your apron. 

Hyunjin’s on break. A necessary one at that. You can’t bother him, especially not when he’s done enough by taking on more responsibility both as a physical worker and a newly actualized business partner recently. A few stacks of boxes and wet hair seem like a fair trade off for what he’s had to sacrifice in the past year now.

“Idiot,” you mumble, cursing yourself for carelessness. Your slip ups have been more frequent lately, evident in the way you constantly forget things and can’t seem to push away the haziness clouding your mind. 

If it weren’t for the timing of it all, you’d blame it on the weather. The gloominess. The overcast skies probably have some sort of hand in your lack of clarity. Shrouded.

But it’s February. And in Jeju— it rains.

By the time you make it back inside, you’re drenched. 

“You look like you just got dunked in a pool.” 

You frown, ringing your hair out into the trash bin by the door. It’ll definitely take time to dry off, both your hair and your clothes are soaked through.

Hyunjin watches with an amused look, arms crossed as he leans his back against the counter.

“Might as well have. It’s insane out there.” you sigh. “How was your break?”

You look up to find that his face has gone unreadable.

“Yeah, about that…” Hyunjin trails off, voice suddenly smaller than before.

“Everything okay?” 

“Yeah, yeah it’s just–” Hyunjin chews at his bottom lip.

You push past him into the supply room to switch out your apron just as he says, “Do you mind if I leave a little early today?”

You scoff, turning to face him. “Hwang Hyunjin,” you scold, lips twitching when he visibly startles at your tone, “You don’t have to ask me that. We’re partners now, remember? We run this place.” 

He shifts on his feet, still unsure.

“Besides,” you huff, tying a knot behind your back, “We were friends way before that, too. You don’t have to be all proper with me. Of course you can leave early. It’s slow today, I can take care of it.”

Hyunjin sighs after contemplating for a second. “Are you sure you’ll be okay, though?” 

When he stares at you for a moment too long, you know the real reason for his hesitation. It makes something twist deep in your gut.

Guilt, maybe, amongst other things.

“Of course.” you shrug, doing your best to seem nonchalant. 

Hyunjin’s ability to read people is kind of intense, a little scary at times. You happen to be one of his favorite subjects in that regard.

“Have fun. Tell Minah I said hi.”

He pales, sputtering around words as he struggles to say something. It’s cute, his plump lips opening and closing, eyes wild.

“I’m not going to see her! I’m–it’s just a movie! How did you—God, you’re so annoying. I should’ve made you trim the tulips. Hah!”

You giggle. “It’s funny that you think I wouldn’t know, especially with the way you love to actually make yourself look busy whenever she stops by to say hi.”

“I am busy.” he mumbles, looking away. “I just emphasize it a lot more when she’s here.”

“Sure,” you roll your eyes, “Let’s go with that.”

He whines a couple more times, trails after you around the shop and laughs when you swat him away with a rolled up newspaper that’s used for wrapping vases.

It’s loud. Easy. Hyunjin is a gentle reminder that normalcy still exists in your day to day, even if it’s hard to find. 

When he finally decides to leave, he lingers for a moment, triple checks that you’ll be okay. You roll your eyes for what feels like the millionth time today, but deep down you’re grateful. 

“Love you,” he says, one foot out the door. “Call me if you need anything.”

You shake your head, ignoring him. “Love you too.” 

And then he’s gone, a skip in his step as he heads down the sidewalk, leaving you with nothing but freshly-trimmed tulips and the sound of rain. 

“Herb snips, shears, tape…” you mumble, scanning the supply shelf. 

There’s not much to do in-shop right now. Almost all the arrangements have been tended to by Hyunjin already, his specialty being his keen eye. That’s why he handles the appeal of the shop, leaving you to figure out all the logistics. Learning it all was easier said than done.

In reality, it was never your intention to take over the shop at all. 

“When I die,” your grandma would always say, ignoring the way you groaned and begged her to stop bringing it up, “Sell this place. Use the money for something worthwhile. A trip to Greece, maybe?”

“Nana,” you would scold, glaring at her where she stood next to you, trimming a batch of roses.

Wrinkled hands that still held all the skill of youth. Fingers moving at a speed others could only ever dream of having– you included.

Your grandma handled flowers with the same amount of care she did everything else. It’s no wonder that when they grew they would lean in her direction, drawn to her like they would be the sun. 

“I’m not selling this place. It’s too special, too important. A vacation only lasts so long, Nana. This is forever.”

She would smile, turn petals over in her hand. Sometimes the marigolds would match the glow in her eyes, a testament to the belief you harbored as a child that she had the ability to sprout blossoms from her fingertips.

“The one thing you shouldn’t do, my dear, is rely on forever. Because that, too, is uncertain.”

You wish you hadn’t been so hard headed. Wish that you would’ve believed her, taken the time to listen, cherished the moment a little bit longer instead of relying on the promise of tomorrow.

I’m sorry for your loss.

Your grandmother was a wonderful woman.

She’ll be with you in your heart, forever.

Oh, what a lie forever is.

The shop stays empty for the rest of the day. There were a few passersby, all of whom simply stopped to scan the arrangements along the windows before giving a polite nod and carrying on their way. 

Realistically, the shop has no problem with attracting customers. It’s a sight to behold: mid-floor to ceiling windows with various displays, hanging baskets of winding greenery, countless arrangements that fill the shelves and add a pop of color, and a wide assortment of flowers for each season. 

The real issue lies in your inability to sell. Most people regard the place as being good for nothing more than window shopping and the usual photo-op.

Business has slowed since your Grandma passed; since you took over as the sole owner and were suddenly face to face with the task of making decisions in the shop’s best interest– both integrity wise and from a business standpoint.

“I know, I know,” you say around the pen cap between your teeth, “You used to be the brains around here, not me. I’m not creative enough for all of this, you know? No matter how much I try to be.”

You look up from where your notebook lays open, dozens of scribbles for arrangement ideas and planning. The picture on the wall stares at you, unmoving, eyes as bright as marigolds.

“Don’t give me that look.” 

She stares. A gaze that holds all the answers while also saying nothing at all.

“Ugh.” you groan, leaning your palms on the desk.

You allow your head to hang forward, defeated, exhaustion flooding your bones. 

Just as you’re about to speak again, to complain about yet another thing that probably has her rolling around in her grave, the bell at the front counter dings.

The clock on the desk reads 6:55pm, five minutes until close. You hadn’t even heard anyone come in.

“Be right there!” you call out, rushing to grab your apron from where you’d thrown it on one of the chairs. 

In your haste, the box of seed packets you’d been inventorying goes tumbling to the floor.

“Fuck,” you mutter, bending down to pick everything up. One more thing to add to the list today. 

Off-kilter. Disoriented. Exhausted. 

You sniffle a few times, blinking against the sting behind your eyes as you stand up to put the box back in its place.

One deep breath, a shake of your shoulders. Just enough to chase it all away until later. 

“Sorry about that,” you say cheerily, pushing past the hanging beads that separate the front of the shop from the back. “How can I help you?”

There’s a stranger, his back turned, attention focused on a batch of tulips. Freshly cut. White, blue, purple.

You realize, belatedly, that you’d forgotten to grab your apron in your haste to clean up the seed packets. Another slip up. Nana always prided herself in her apron, wore it like a badge of honor, raised you to do the same.

Just as you spin around to grab it, the stranger says, “It’s okay. I just, um, I wanted to say hi.”

You freeze. There’s a long moment where his voice rings loud in your ears, reverberates against the walls of your brain until it travels through your blood, the feeling like wildfire in your veins until it settles deep in the pit of your stomach. 

Slowly, you turn, heart clamoring in your chest, threatening to stop altogether as soon as you come face to face with the one person you never thought you’d see again.

Because there, at the front of the store, is Jisung.

Jisung, with wide eyes and parted lips. Jisung, with hair that still curls at the ends and falls in shags around his face. Jisung, broader, more actualized, now grown into his features but still undeniably soft around the edges. Jisung, with thick framed glasses pushed up his nose and silver hoops dangling from his ears. 

A stranger. But undoubtedly Jisung. 

“You look…nice.” he says, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly with his free hand.

Three words is all it takes. Ice turns to fire. The blood that had drained from your face returns with the blaze of a thousand suns, anger burning your throat. 

You reach forward, grab the remote for the neon Open sign and click the power button. Jisung watches in confusion.

“The shop is closed.” you manage on a shaky breath.

Jisung sighs, something heavy. “Listen, I’m—”

“The shop–” you try again, louder, “–is closed.” 

Jisung stares. His eyes are still the same velvety brown; big and round and just as you remember. 

There was once a time where the sight of Jisung in your Grandma’s shop made your heart sing. A soft tune, the thrum of a thousand harps, a song only for him.

His heart-shaped smile as he helped her hammer some of the shelves onto the wall. The sound of his laughter whenever you’d enter a sneezing fit from accidentally rubbing your face with a gloved hand. His rosy cheeks, burnt from the wind whipping past his face as he ran on foot to make sure you were okay the one time an angry customer smashed a vase on the floor and you called him crying.

But now, seeing him here, a stranger in a body you once knew like the back of your hand— it feels wrong. 

“I…” he trails off, registering the way your fists are clenched at your sides. 

“Okay,” he resigns, licking his lips. “I, uh– have a good night.”

He gives you one last look, bottom lip pulled tight between his teeth, and then slips out the door. You watch his retreating figure through the glass panel, dark gray skies muting the sound of your rattling heart.

It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. Jisung is back.

And in Jeju– it rains.

There’s an apple tree in the middle of town where Jisung told you he loved you for the first and last time. 

Off the corner, a few minutes down the road from where your houses stand a mere five hundred feet away from one another.

Your grandparents were farmers. Your grandma started her floral business a few years before you were born, a dream she always had that your grandpa urged her to pursue once he decided to sell the animals to a younger, more capable couple that could take care of them. 

Jisung’s parents, new residents on the island, looking to settle down and start a family. 

That’s how it happens. Yours and Jisung’s story, two authors of the same book, destined since the start.

Jisung was born on the same night your mother left you at your grandparents’ doorstep. One note, an apology, is all you’ve ever known about her. Your grandma never cared to indulge you. You’re glad in a way. She provided more than enough love to make sure you never felt an absence in her wake. 

The townspeople used to say you and Jisung were soulmates. Something about the heavens knowing he would need a friend, hence why you were delivered that night. From that moment on, the two of you were inseparable. 

Attached at the hip, you and Jisung grew up together. First steps, first birthdays, firsts for everything under the sun.

Jisung was there in the morning to walk with you to school and he was there at night when the two of you tucked into bed, sleepovers a regular occurrence, both of you counting the pale green stick-on stars dotting his ceiling until you fell asleep. 

Jisung was always around. He held your hand and walked with you to the nurse’s office the first time you got stung by a bee. He wiped your eyes when the boy you liked told you he only ever saw you as a friend, your first rejection. He sat with you under the stars the night your grandpa died, your face tucked into his neck as you stained the collar of his shirt with tears until you were too tired to cry. In the years that followed, he took care of you and your grandma like the two of you were his own. 

Jisung, for lack of a better word, was your first forever.

“You could come with me, you know.” 

Under the stars, real ones that time, Jisung had turned to you and offered the world. 

The air was cold. The apple tree was bare.

“It’ll be fun. We’ll be together, we’ll experience new things. I can do music and you can study all that history stuff you like to learn about. You know, nerdy things.”

“They’re not nerdy things, Ji. Don’t you know everything we have now is because of what’s happened before us?” you’d asked. “Doesn’t it make you wonder? Learning about the past helps us better understand the present, and ultimately the future.”

Jisung had hummed softly, an agreement. “I don’t care about the future, though.” he’d said. “I care about right now. You, me, this.” 

When you turned to look at him, he propped himself up on one elbow and stared down at you from above as the moon casted a halo around his head. 

“I love you,” he whispered, “And I want you to come with me.”

Jisung, with all the stars in his eyes and a heart full of dreams. Jisung, with the world at his fingertips and the ambition to make it his own. 

You, with all your hopes stuffed tight into a suitcase and chained to a boulder, thrown into the ocean. Sinking and sinking until it hit the bottom.

“I love you too,” you whispered back.

Images of marigolds flashed behind your eyes when you closed them, a tear rolling down your cheek. Jisung’s mouth was soft when he kissed it away, salt on his lips. Burning. 

“But I can’t.” you choked. 

Under the apple tree, Jisung told you he loved you for the first and last time. He promised that the distance would be no match for him, that he would traverse oceans to find his way back. He promised forever.

It was February. The tulips were in bloom. Jisung left to pursue his dreams with a guitar on his back and your heart in his hands. Your understanding of forever was shot at point blank. The bullet passed clean through you. 

And in Jeju– it rained.

“I think you should talk to him.”

The sun is out today. Perfect weather for another field harvest. The distributor had called you early in the morning to ask if you’d be willing to accept a drop off even though it’s the weekend. You’d agreed, calling in your most reliable help for the job.

“And I think you’re not helping.” you huff, snipping the head off another hyacinth.

“Agreed,” Hyunjin parrots from beside you, currently in the middle of putting together an arrangement, “This guy sounds like a total dick.”

Chan sighs from behind the two of you, his knees knocking against the legs of the desk when he swivels back and forth in the chair. 

Besides Hyunjin and Jeongin, both of whom moved into town after you’d already graduated, and of course, Jisung– Chan is your oldest friend. 

Chan was also a neighbor of yours. Three years older than you and Jisung, he was the one who acted as a role model for the two of you when growing up. Nowadays he helps his parents run the largest orange grove on the island during the day and DJs one of the clubs in the tourism hub at night. 

“Jisung’s not a dick, he’s just–”

“An asshole.” you finish, smirking when Hyunjin cackles. 

Chan sighs. Again. “Yeah okay, I’ll give you that one.”

“Listen, I know I’ve never met him, but isn’t it weird that he just, like, showed up?” Hyunjin asks, setting down his scissors. You continue trimming the hyacinths, listening halfheartedly.

“I mean, think about it. Dude disappears to pursue music, right? He’s gone for what– three years?”

“Four.” you correct.

“God, even worse.” he grimaces.

“But yeah, okay, four years. And then boom! He just strolls in through the front door without so much as a word during the time he was gone? No letters, no phone calls, not even a damn visit. Nothing! All so he can pop up and go ‘oh, you look nice’? Come on.” he scoffs, crossing his arms.

You wince, caught off guard because you’ve never really heard it phrased as bluntly as Hyunjin put it just then. It’s no surprise that he’s annoyed, having only just heard the full story thirty minutes ago. He’d been shocked, partly because you never told him and also because he just couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Okay, yes, he was wrong for that. But isn’t part of you even just the least bit curious as to why?” 

You pause mid-snip, mulling Chan’s words over in your head.

The most frustrating part about it all is that you are curious. You wish you weren’t, though. Not when you’ve spent the past four years trying to convince yourself that you don’t need to know what Jisung’s been up to, don’t need to know if he’s been okay since he clearly held no concern for you in that regard anyways.

“What?” you ask when you realize that both boys are staring at you. 

“Well?” Hyunjin pushes. “Are you?”

You shrug. “No, not really.” 

There’s a total of five seconds that pass before Hyunjin is stomping over and hauling Chan up out of his chair, pushing him towards the front door as he protests.

“Out! Out, out, out, we have important business matters to discuss.”

“But we were supposed to get lunch—!”

“We’re taking a rain check!” Hyunjin fights back, shoving him out of the shop before he has a chance to answer. He drops the shade to cover the glass, Chan’s sad figure left alone on the other side.

You gape at him. “What was that for?”

Hyunjin scoffs. “You think you’re convincing? Think again.” 

He hops up on to the counter and gestures for you to do the same. When you do, he pulls you closer, grabs your hand in his, and pushes your head down until it’s resting on his shoulder. 

“Tell me the truth now,” he says, soft. “I know there’s more to it.”

Hyunjin’s warm to the touch. The heat seeps through the fabric of his shirt, igniting the skin of your cheek until you feel like you’re standing too close to the sun. A star. Hyunjin is a light in your tunnel.

“I am curious,” you start, “About him, I mean. I’ve– I don’t know. It’s been so long. I tried to pretend I didn’t care when I saw him, but the minute I looked into his eyes it was like I was eighteen again. Eighteen and happy and looking at someone that I always thought would be there, you know?” 

Hyunjin hums but doesn’t say anything. He squeezes your hand once, a signal to keep going. 

“I’m scared, though. Part of me doesn’t want to know.”

Hyunjin takes a deep breath. “What are you scared of?”

Through the gaps in the beads you can see into your office, the picture of your Grandma hanging on the wall. She stares at you, unblinking. 

“What if he tells me that it’s true?” you ask, lifting your head to look up at him. “What if he says that I was right, that he didn’t care? That he left and didn’t want to call because it no longer mattered to him? That he loves his life there and only came back to clear his own conscience?” 

“Oh honey,” Hyunjin soothes, pulling you into his chest. You hadn’t realized you were crying, that the anger and fear had bubbled over until there were tears falling down your cheeks, wetting the fabric of Hyunjin’s sweater. 

He lets you cry for a while. It’s nothing new; Hyunjin has seen you break down countless times. He’s been there through the worst of it, held your hand even in the aftermath. He’s picked you up off the floor more times than you can count, has grounded you when you felt like the world was gonna open up beneath you and swallow you whole. Salt of the earth, returning you to its core.

Once you’ve quieted into nothing more than shallow breaths and a few scattered hiccups, Hyunjin speaks again.

“Can you be honest with me?”

You nod, the hair stuck to your cheek with tears rubbing against his shoulder. 

“Do you love him?”

It nearly knocks the wind out of you. This concept, so foreign to you now, shoved to the back of your mind to make room for the things that matter most. Hospital visits, labor cuts, wage increases— none of it left any room for love, let alone the thought of someone else. Especially someone as all-consuming as Jisung.

Slowly, you inhale, breath shaking on the exhale. Hyunjin squeezes your hand to remind you that he’s there.

“I don’t think I ever stopped, Hyune.”

The silence stretches thin. The realization is dizzying. Years of suppressed emotions, of telling yourself and everyone around you that it wasn’t a big deal. The sad eyes of the townspeople whenever they’d see you sitting beneath the apple tree. The gentle touch of your grandma’s hand when she’d find you on the front steps alone, staring at the stars. The soft hum of the radio in the shop, set to a playlist of all the songs he’s written, the only reminder that somewhere out there he was doing well.

The final crack in the dam, its water pushing until it gives way.

“Then you owe it to yourself,” Hyunjin says. “You owe it to your heart to get an answer. Free yourself from this pain, love. Don’t let yourself suffer forever.”

Forever. That word again. No matter how many times you’ve tried to escape it, it always comes back.

“It’s gonna hurt.” he sighs, tightening his grip when you sniffle. “It’s gonna hurt so fucking bad, babe. But you can take it. You’ve got people who love you enough to stand in front of you and soften the blow from time to time. But you’ll be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”

He hops down from the counter and moves to stand in front of you, right between your legs. Placing both hands on your shoulders, he pushes until you’re sitting with your back straight and lifts your chin. 

“You deserve an answer.” he says, with conviction this time. “Okay?”

He lets his thumb swipe beneath your eyes, smiles softly. Unconditional— that’s what he is. Hyunjin burns brighter than any star in your sky, the heat wrapping its arms around you like it’s too scared to let go, to watch you freeze and die out like so many others. 

“I don’t deserve you, though.” you say, laughing wetly when he rolls his eyes.

“Shut up,” he chuckles, pulling you in for a hug, “You deserve everything and more.”

When Jisung comes into the shop two days later, you’re ready for it. 

Chan had talked to him. No surprise, really, not when he’s been letting him crash in his spare room ever since he figured out that he was holed up in one of the hotels out in the tourism hub. 

If there’s one thing about Chan, it’s that he’d rip the shirt off his back to clothe anyone in need. Housing a friend is nothing, especially when that friend is Jisung.

“I don’t know how much of a consolation this is,” he’d said nervously, watching as you regarded him with an expectant look, “But he’s pretty cut up about you not wanting to see him. Which, I know, is stupid. He is the one who fucked up. But I just– I don’t know. I’ve never seen him like this, I guess.”

It’s not a consolation, not really. Knowing that Jisung is struggling is far from anything you want to hear. 

Sure, there’s anger present. Anyone would be stupid to not feel the least bit frustrated with what’s happened. Years lost, time stripped away. But you’ve long since come to terms with it, the anger turning to sadness in the meantime.

“Also, he leaves tomorrow.” Chan smiled sadly. “He really wants to talk to you before then.”

Hyunjin left early again today to give the two of you space. Not before making a show of his own though, threatening to incite violence with his arms that are supposedly ‘shredded’ from years of lifting boxes filled with petunias. 

The shop is slow again, not many sales nor a lot of foot traffic. Usually when the sun is out there’s more to do; people to see, smiles to give. But there’s nothing, just the chirping of birds and the sound of cars rolling by. 

Maybe the world knows that this is what you need. The calm before the storm. 

Five minutes until close. You’ve spent most of the day pacing back and forth. Waiting. Anticipating. 

Chan had said Jisung planned on stopping by, trying again. You’d told him that was okay, and his eyes lit up. Too much hope, maybe, that something might come of this. 

You’re seated in the back office, staring at marigold colored irises when the front door opens. You hear it this time, ears fine tuned, waiting. 

Slowly, you stand, make your way to the front. You don’t realize you’re holding your breath until you pull back the beaded curtain and Jisung’s figure comes into view. 

He looks the same as he did the other day: curled hair, thick glasses, parted lips. His sweater, fluffy and striped, hangs off of his shoulders in a way that boxes off his tapered waist, one that you know is hidden beneath all the layers. The sleeves are way too long judging by the way it curls over his fingers. 

“Hi.” he breathes out, watching as you step into full view.

You blink. “Hi, Jisung.”

His name feels weird on your tongue. Bitter. It’s been years since you uttered it, forbidding yourself from the luxury out of fear that it would make his absence more real. Talking about him in the past tense always scared you off before you could even get the chance. 

“How– How’ve you been?” he chews on the inside of his lip.

You want to scold him, tell him to stop the habit just like you always would in the past. He’d make a joke then, tell you to kiss him so that he had something else to do instead. You would laugh, feign disgust, but in the back of your mind you’d wanted it more than anything. 

You’d waited for it, the day you could kiss him without warning and melt into his touch as he kissed you back. Another stupid bet on forever; the belief that you had all the time in the world for things to get to that point.

“I’ve been better.” you say, taking a deep breath. “What about you?”

Good, you think. He’s been good. He looks good. He doesn’t need this place.

“Me too.” he says instead. “I’ve been better.”

You don’t know what to say to that. Silence fills the room, heavy on both your chests. The anticipation feels like it might kill you before anything else does. 

“I’m sorry that–”

“Is that all you came here to say?” you cut him off.

“What?” he asks, confused. “No, I– no.”

“What, then? What is it you want to say, Jisung?” your voice is firm. He winces when his name leaves your mouth. “Because, honestly, I’ve waited all this time to hear literally anything from you, and if all that comes out of this is that you’ve ‘been better’ I might actually lose my fucking mind.”

The words tumble out faster than you intend. You can’t help it, not with the way anxiety has been bubbling over in your chest since the moment you woke up this morning. You could barely sleep last night, not when you were playing out every possible scenario in your head, the anticipation of it all making your sheets feel scratchy against your skin and the lumps in your pillow more discernible. 

“No, no, of course I wouldn’t do that.” he says quickly. “It's just that I didn’t know where to start. I don’t know how much you’ll allow me to say, what the boundary is here. I didn’t want to just barge in and demand you listen to me. You don’t owe me that. You don’t owe me anything. Not after what I did.”

What I did, his voice rings loud in your ears. He’s aware of it, of the pain he caused. 

He takes a step forward, and then another, again and again until he’s right up against the front counter, an arm’s length away. 

Your breath catches then, when you see him up close for the first time in four years, see the way he’s grown and changed with your own eyes. 

Stubble dotting his chin, laugh lines around his mouth, the dip and curve of the bow above his lips that you always loved. Brown eyes, soil and stardust. 

“Tell me what your conditions are,” he says quietly, “And I’ll give you every explanation I have.”

The sincerity on his face is blinding. Your stomach twists at the thought of hearing what he has to say, that same fear brewing in the pit of it. You take a deep breath, feel the phantom ghost of a hand squeezing yours and a crescent moon eye smile. 

“I waited four years for you.” you say.

“I know.”

“I trusted that you’d be back. That you would keep in touch during the time you were gone.”

“I–” his voice cracks. “I know.”

“You lied to me.”

Jisung tips his head back then. Swallows down a lump in his throat. Blinks rapidly at the ceiling, veins of ivy crawling along the expanse of it.

“I know.”

“So you owe me everything. I deserve that. I deserve answers.”

When he brings his head down to look at you, it’s unreadable. A mix of emotions that you aren’t familiar enough with anymore to decipher. Fear, guilt, sorrow. Hope, too. Maybe.

You stare at him head on, fully letting your eyes meet for the first time in what feels like an eternity. He holds your gaze, unwavering. Determined. The sight makes your heart clench. 

“Okay,” he says after a beat of silence. “Okay. I can do that.”

Despite the ever-growing mountain of things to address, you decide that the first thing you want to hear from Jisung is about his time in Seoul. 

You’re only human, after all.

Best friends from the start– you can’t stop yourself from wondering what life has been like for him. Jisung’s always been good at storytelling, animated in his features and gestures to the point that you’d be rolling around and clutching your stomach from laughter. It’s one of the things you missed the most, just talking and being present in one another’s lives.

The two of you end up at one of the diners down the road. The owners, an elderly couple, coo as soon as they catch sight of you.

“My flower girl,” the old lady, Mrs. Kim, greets.

“Mrs. Kim,” you beam, moving in for a hug. When you pull away, Jisung is behind you, hands clasped behind his back and feet together like he has his tail between his legs.

“Halmeoni,” you say, gesturing at him, “Do you remember Jisungie?” 

His eyes go wide at the nickname, and you try to ignore the heat creeping up your neck, avoiding his gaze and instead watching as Mrs. Kim blinks in surprise.

“Oh! Oh my goodness, our Jisungie? Honey! Honey, look, Jisung is here! Oh you crazy boy,” she scolds, rushing forward to hit his shoulder and pull him in for a hug. “Where have you been? It’s been ages!” 

Jisung lets out an oof! as her body slams into him, all of his anxiousness dissolving into laughter as he hugs her back. 

“Hi Mrs. Kim, how have you been?” 

“Me?” she asks, pulling him away to hold at arm’s length, “Nevermind about me! I’m old! How have you been?”

Good, you think again, a mimic of earlier. Jisungs eyes flit over to yours for the smallest of moments before he answers.

“Better,” he says. “I’m doing better.”

Once both Mr. and Mrs. Kim are done doting over the both of you, they seat you by the window.

The island is always beautiful on sunny days: trees swaying, golden rays painting the rooftops in hues of pink and orange, the indigo shimmer of the ocean off in the distance.

“So,” you say, catching Jisung’s attention, “Tell me about Seoul.”

He hums. “It’s busy. Stinks. Lots of people.”

“Dream come true, yeah?” you joke, taking a sip of your water.

Jisung chuckles. “You could say that, I guess.”

“I mean, it was yours.”

“It was.” he sighs, looking down at the table. “I don’t know. It’s nice. I met good people, made even better connections. I live in this one bedroom studio apartment just outside of Itaewon, so I’m close to where all the foreigners hang out. I’ve learned a lot, gained a lot of inspiration for my music.”

You follow along, staring at him intently. His mouth, still heart-shaped, twitches when he catches you in the act.

You clear your throat, glancing away. “Yeah, I’ve– uh, I’ve heard some of your songs.”

He raises his eyebrows, almost like he hadn’t expected you to say that. “Really?”

“Yeah. I mean, I hear them on the radio sometimes.” A lie. “It usually takes me a second to realize that it’s you.” Another lie. “But they’re good, you’re doing well.”

Pink dusts the tops of Jisung’s cheeks as he turns back to the window, clearing his throat.

He looks younger like this, like he’s still the same boy who would sit across from you all those years ago. Cherry-stained lips and a smile so bright it put the sun to shame.

He talks a bit more about his music, about how he’s with a good company that gives him creative freedom and enough support to pursue more if he desires.

His eyes light up when he tells you about his studio, a small room on the fifth floor of a building in the middle of the city where he does all of his writing. It’s equipped with an entire soundboard, full of instruments that he says he’s been able to get signed by artists that come in and out. Most notably, his guitar, the same one he left with. 

Slowly, like a flower blossoming, petals opening one by one, you feel yourself falling back into step with him.

Everything is so familiar: the curve of his smile, the tilt in his voice when he gets excited, the rumble of laughter when he recounts an embarrassing run-in with an A-list celebrity in the company’s cafeteria. He shares stories that fill your heart as the two of you fill your stomachs.

But with the ease comes something more, something you recognize as longing. You hadn’t realized how much you longed to be there through this part of his life, how you wished you’d been the one to answer a video call as he showed off his apartment the first day he moved in, his company badge when it was newly issued, every moment of happiness that you’d been absent for just as much as he was absent for yours.

He seems to share the same sentiment then, when he sets down his fork and stares at his empty plate. 

“You run the shop now,” he says, “How’s that been?”

You purse your lips, nodding your head slowly. You knew this conversation would happen, that it was coming.

“It’s good, I guess. Been almost a year now since, uh, it was left to me.” you shrug. “I’m not alone though, Hyunjin is a big help. I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

Jisung noticeably bristles. Eyebrows pulled together, staring more intently at a crumb on his plate. It looks like there’s a lot he wants to say, like he can’t find the words to say them.

So, naturally, you do it for him. 

“I assume Chan told you so I wouldn’t have to, by the way.”

He looks up then, as if he wasn’t expecting you to address the very obvious elephant in the room.

“He did, yes.” Jisung says after a while. His voice is quiet, gentle, like he’s walking on eggshells. “I– I didn’t know how to bring it up. I assume you’ve heard it all already but– I really, really am sorry to hear about Nana.”

The way her name sounds coming out of his mouth turns your mind to static.

Suddenly you’re in the hospital again, monitors beeping, hands as soft as petals cradled in your own and wishing that you could bury your face in a familiar neck as you cried and watched the marigolds wilt. 

“I don’t need an apology for that.” you croak, blinking back tears. Jisung is somewhere in your periphery, your vision blurry around the edges.

“It wasn’t sad. Her life, I mean. It was full. Of love. Of light. She left this place happy. That’s what she told me, at least.”

You take a deep breath. “So don’t be sorry about it.”

Jisung sniffles, and the sound shoots straight through your chest. 

“I know. I just– I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I should’ve been. I had no idea that–”

“Nobody did, Jisung. Don’t punish yourself for that.”

He sees it then, when you finally meet his eyes, the acceptance. You’ve come to terms with things a long time ago, have fought tooth and nail to come out on the other side of all the guilt and resentment and grief alive. Scathed, but alive nonetheless.

“You’re right.” he sighs, wiping at his eyes quickly. “She’d probably yell at me for saying that.”

You laugh, suddenly, the noise startling him. Jisung looks at you like you’re crazy.

“I think she has a lot more to yell at you for than being sorry that she died.”

The bluntness punches a chuckle out of him, and you giggle at the thought.

Your grandmother was always such an outspoken person. She always said what was on her mind, speaking it loud. There’s no doubt that if she was here she’d be berating Jisung, smacking him upside the head before pulling him into a hug and cooking his favorite meal. Tough love, but still, love.

“She would’ve loved to be able to see you.” you say once your laughter dies out, the air a bit lighter between the two of you. “She always wondered if you’d grow your hair out without her around to nag you about keeping it short.” 

He reaches up to run a hand through his curls, the strands falling around his face in a way that has your heart stammering in your chest.

“Well, clearly I don’t know how to listen.”

“No, you don’t.”

Jisung smiles softly. “Maybe I’ll cut it now. You know, since I’m here. And because I know she’d want me to.”

You watch him carefully, searching his eyes. For what, you don’t know. All that’s in them are stars. 

“Yeah,” you say quietly. “You’re here.”

By the time the two of you leave the diner, stomachs full and enough bags of extra side dishes hanging off of your arms to last you at least two weeks, courtesy of Mrs. Kim, the sun is almost fully set. 

The ocean is calm, the evening breeze just barely brushing the surface of the tide. Jisung walks in step with you down the street, one side of his face cast in a glow from the sun’s fading rays. 

“Do you think you’d maybe want to stop by the arcade that Old Man Park runs? Just for a little?”

You snort. “Why? So I can embarrass you?”

“Hey!” he puts a hand on his chest, offended. “I’ll have you know that I let you win all those times.”

“How do you let someone win after spending hours practicing while I worked at the shop?”

“I was being nice!”

“Uh huh.”

“Don’t believe me?” he grins. You try not to look, afraid of how bad your blood pressure might spike from the sight. 

“I’ll have you know that I’m one of the best Kart Rider players in the PC Bang scene back in Seoul.”

“Jisung,” you scold, “That’s a computer game. These are coin-ops. There’s way more skill needed.”

“No there isn’t!”

He knocks his shoulder against yours, tucking his chin to his chest to hide his smile when you try to fight back.

It’s easy. Nice. There’s a soft melody echoing in the dust-covered chambers of your heart. You still know all the chords.

Old Man Park’s arcade is a few doors down from the shop. You stop there to drop off the food, spare a glance in the mirror hanging in your office to fix your hair.

Your grandma’s picture stares at you from the other wall, eyes bright.

“Love you,” you say, kissing the skin of your fingertips and pressing it gently against the frame.

Jisung is toeing at a few rocks on the sidewalk when you walk back out. He doesn’t see you, too busy with his eyes casted down at the concrete, hands shoved into his pockets. 

It’s still hard to believe that he’s here. Flesh and bone. For a long time it felt like he was nothing but a distant dream, someone who only existed in the memories that you kept locked deep within your heart, the key somewhere on the streets of Seoul.

“Ready?” you ask.

He looks up, his glasses moving when his cheeks round into a smile.

Something passes across his face– a myriad of emotions in just a fraction of a second. Hesitantly, he holds out his hand. Long, delicate fingers.

You stare at it, swallowing roughly around the butterfly wings flapping inside your throat. 

The one thing you shouldn’t do, my dear, is rely on forever. Because that, too, is uncertain.

Forever isn’t promised. But even then, there are things you know for sure:

It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. Jisung is here. Living, breathing, in the flesh. 

So you take his hand, watch as relief floods his features, and let yourself feel.

The wind in your hair, the calluses on Jisung’s palms, and the warmth radiating out of the smile that threatens to split his face into two.

And with that certainty, the two of you start walking. A silent agreement to focus on the now.

You. Him. This.

“God, I can’t believe everything is only one coin.”

You laugh, watching as the multi-colored lights cast a glow on Jisung’s face. 

“Stop acting like you don’t remember this place.”

“I don’t!” he argues, smiling. “We stopped coming here, what, in middle school? Once Chan hyung started driving? We would always ask him to take us to the other one out in the big town!”

Chan’s first car was an old Camry with leather seats and enough room for the three of you to pile into after school. Used, but still with enough juice to satisfy three young kids who felt like they were on top of the world.

You used to sit in the back, the wind whipping your hair every which way while yours and Jisung’s hands lay side by side in the middle seat, pinkies brushing but neither of you willing to take it further. 

“Oh, shit!” Jisung gasps, letting go of your hand as he runs up to the space invaders machine. 

“Here we go,” you sigh, following after him. He’s like a kid in a candy store, face filled with innocent wonder and joy.

“Aren’t there, like, I don’t know– things better than this in Seoul?” you ask as he shoves a coin into the game.

Jisung turns to look at you with a devilish grin. “Obviously,” he says, “But I can’t beat anyone’s high score over there. Here though? Ha! This place is ancient. I can finally be at the top of the leaderboard in something.”

“We’ll see about that.” you mumble, the noise of the game booting up drowning you out. 

Jisung sticks his tongue out when he focuses really hard on things. It’s cute, the way the end of it sits between his lips, spit-slick and parted just a little bit.

He’s glowing, probably because of the lights, hues of red and green and blue flashing across his face. But then again, Jisung has always shined brighter than anything. 

The game beeps to signal that he has one life left. He grunts a few times, his fingers tapping the buttons madly as his other hand handles the joystick in a frenzy of movements.

When it ends, he groans, throws his hands up in defeat.. 

You shake your own head knowingly, watching his eyes bug out of their sockets as soon as the leaderboard appears on the screen, the 8-bit letters blinking at him. 

“You’re joking.” he laughs in disbelief, turning to stare at you. “Please tell me you’re joking.” 

There, on the screen, is your name. The highest score. Jeongin and Hyunjin’s names sit just below you, respectively.

“What was that again about finally being able to be at the top?” you mock him, smirking.

“Since when did you get good at this?”

You shrug. “Had to find something to do in my free time.”

“No,” he says, rolling up his sleeves. “Nuh-uh. No way. This is not happening. I will beat you.” he holds out his hand for another coin, to which you roll your eyes and place one in his palm. 

“You might as well give up now. We’ll be here all night.”

“In your dreams.” he scoffs, assuming his position as another round loads onto the screen.  

Jisung has always been competitive. It’s one of his more hidden characteristics. 

It persists still, you realize, as you watch him burn through the styrofoam cup of coins that Old Man Park had given the two of you. Free of charge for old time’s sake.

Fort-five minutes. All he’s managed to do is bump Hyunjin down to fourth.

“Ugh!” he groans, kicking the machine lightly with his foot. 

“Look at you throwing a tantrum.”

“I’m not throwing a tantrum.” he pouts. You raise an eyebrow.

“Okay fine. I’m throwing a tantrum.” 

“Thought so.”

“Can you blame me?” he asks. “This is, like, our first date. And I’m sucking. Hard.”

“Our–” you stop, eyes wide. Jisung mimics you, almost like he didn’t mean to say what he did. 

Heat rushes to your cheeks. Your mind goes blank. But the world doesn’t end. Time keeps moving. Jisung is still here.

“I didn’t–”

“I like the sound of that.” you say quickly. “Of this being our first date, I mean.’

He smiles. Slow and sweet like molasses. Blinding.

“And the fact that you suck.”

The moment is shattered, his resulting whine echoing throughout the arcade.

“Come on you big baby,” you laugh, grabbing his hand. “I know a game you can beat me at.”

He lets himself be pulled, pretending that he’s upset, but you can see the smile tugging at his lips when you lace your fingers together.

The feeling is still new, this ease you have with him. The wounds you sported all those years are still healing, some more fresh than others. But with each laugh that comes out of Jisung’s mouth and shared glance, every note that your heart sings, you can feel them beginning to fade. A balm to soothe the burn.

The Pac-Man game is situated in the back corner of the arcade, right next to the jukebox. It used to be your favorite, because Jisung would always use his own coins to play songs for you while you tried to score higher than twenty-five thousand points. 

When you get there, he frowns. “The only game you think I can beat you at is Pac-Man?” 

“I don’t think,” you say, grabbing a coin before shoving the cup into his chest. “I know.”

The game boots up instantly, and you smile softly to yourself when Jisung moves wordlessly behind you, slips a coin into the jukebox.

“Play something good, Jisungie.”

He freezes. Out of the corner of your eye you watch him stare at you for a long moment. And then he smiles. Stardust.

“You got it.”

In a matter of seconds, Lovers In A Dangerous Time by Bruce Cockburn rings throughout the arcade, the speakers on the ceiling fighting past the static.

An old song. The same one your grandparents would dance to in the mornings, eggs on the stove and love in the air.

Your grandma used to say it was written for them, because when they fell in love the war was at its peak and she didn’t know if he’d ever come home. 

After he passed, she still played it, except those times it was Jisung who twirled her around and painted a smile on her face as you watched from the same spot you grew up in. Always there.

Jisung, Jisung, Jisung. 

When the game starts, you try your best. It’s hard. You’ve always been terrible at anything involving quick decisions. Focusing on everything at once isn’t easy for you, that much is still true. 

“Shit.” you mumble, the top right corner of the screen reading ten thousand points as the ghosts run into you.

Jisung lets out a low whistle. “Harsh.”

“You wanna go back to space invaders and waste the last of our money?” you raise an eyebrow. 

He holds his hands up in surrender. “Sorry, sorry. Go ahead.” he says, holding the cup out for you to take another coin. 

You try a couple more times, failing each and every one. You can tell that Jisung is growing more and more amused with every attempt, and the smugness radiating off of him is starting to rub you the wrong way.

“If you’re so good,” you say after a particularly sad attempt, turning to glare at him. Jisung has his lips pulled tight to stop himself from laughing. “Then why don’t you try?”

He chuckles then. “I’d rather help you, if you’ll let me.”

“How are you supposed to do that? We only have one coin left.”

Jisung doesn’t say anything. He puts the cup down, the last coin held between his fingers. You watch as he slips it into the machine, move to get out of his way once he’s done, but he stops you by grabbing your hand and spinning you back around, his fingers placed over yours on the joystick. 

With your back flush against his front, caged in by his arms on either side, Jisung takes a deep breath.

“This okay?” he asks right next to your ear, the curls on the side of his head brushing your cheek when he leans down to get a better look at the screen.

Warm. He’s so warm. The material of his sweater only worsens the heat, and the faint scent of vanilla makes your head swim.

It’s more than okay. Great, even. It’s Jisung. Everything and more.

“Yeah,” you say, letting him control your hands as he flicks the joystick. “It’s okay.”

The hair against your cheek moves when he smiles. “Good.” he says, and then hits the start button.

The game begins but you’re barely processing what’s happening, too aware of the feeling of his body pressed against yours. 

A firm chest, different from what’s observable on the outside, what with the fluffiness of his sweater and soft features. His arms too, encasing you, the bulge and flex of his biceps every time he moves.

It’s all so intoxicating, so much so that you don’t even realize you’ve beaten the highest score in the system by the time he loses his last life. 

“What?” you blink. “What the hell?!”

You laugh, spinning to face Jisung who’s grinning from ear to ear. In your excitement, you jump, flinging your arms around his neck. He’s surprised, but catches you nonetheless, circling his arms around your waist.

“Holy shit how’d you do that!” you squeal while he swings you around, feet off the ground.

“Magic, I guess.” he chuckles. 

The closeness of his voice brings you crashing back down, suddenly aware of what position you’re both in. You pull back quickly, clear your throat, and watch as his face falls from the loss of contact.

It’s been a long time since you hugged Jisung. The thought transports you to that day four years ago, standing under the apple tree, the future uncertain. Forever promised.

Things are different now.

“Sorry,” he backtracks. “I didn’t– um, I wasn’t trying to–”

You cut him off by throwing yourself at him for a second time. Intentional. Breathless. Tired of running and acting like it’s not the thing you want most in the entire world.

Jisung doesn’t react until he feels your face against the skin of his neck. On instinct, he hugs tight, hands around your waist, breathing in the smell of your hair.

“Hi.” you whisper against him. 

One word. Simple. However the weight of it sends a chill down his spine. It feels like home. 

He tightens his hold. A silent understanding. The two of you never had much of a need for words anyways. 

“Hi.” he whispers back.

The apple tree is much bigger now.

Long, thick branches, a wide trunk, a slight tilt in its shape.

It’s bare. The season is long gone. But it’s okay, because it means that the view of the stars isn’t blocked when you and Jisung lay beneath it.

It’s the same but it isn’t. There’s gaps– periods of time where the two of you grew separately. There are moments and memories tucked away that neither of you know about, whole lives to discover. 

But even so, it feels right. His arm wrapped around you, your head on his chest. The stars and the moon. You and Jisung.

It’s nice. Perfect, even. But there’s a conversation that needs to be had. One that can’t be put off any longer.

“Ji.”

“Hm?”

“Can I ask you something?”

Jisung shifts beneath you, tightening his hold. The grass is damp. Neither of you care, too caught up in each other to stress about whether or not it’ll stain.

“Of course.”

“Am I ever gonna see you again?”

He takes a deep breath. “Yes.”

“You said that last time.”

“I know.”

“So what makes this different?” you ask, sitting up. He watches you carefully, eyes trained on every movement like he’s scared you’ll get up and run away.

When he realizes you’re waiting for an answer, he sits up too, pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around his legs. 

He doesn’t say anything, just wordlessly reaches into his pocket. Silently, he hands whatever he grabbed to you. A guitar pick.

It’s white, a marbled design. Golden flecks infused into the lines. There, on the front, is a singular marigold. When you flip it over, you’re met with a tulip. 

“Do you remember that one time, when you called me crying at midnight because Nana told you that she didn’t know if she’d be able to afford school in the city?”

You nod silently, still turning the guitar pick over in your hand. 

It was one of those nights where the rain was relentless. Monsoon season always tagged on to the tail end of the school year, bringing with it a more intense gloominess than usual. 

You’d been angry. Stressed. Irritated that other kids at school were making plans to go to the mainland for college and you were stuck helping your grandmother trim foliage and wrap vases in newspaper.

“You told me that you couldn’t do it anymore.” Jisung whispered, staring up at the sky. “That you were tired of being here. That you needed to get out.”

You remember. Jisung had walked through the rain to show up at your window. Had climbed in with muddy shoes and sat on the floor of your room with you until the downpour stopped and your tears dried.

“And I said that I would make it happen, that I would invent a way to live amongst the stars so you could be as far from here as possible.”

“So what?” you ask, looking at him. “Did you finally do it, then? Is that why you came back?”

“Don’t be like that.”

“No, Jisung, I’m gonna fucking be like that.” you scoff, rising to your feet. 

There’s a fire in your veins, stoked until the embers are burning hot against your throat. Too good to be true. You should’ve known that there was no explanation left for him to give.

Jisung scrambles to his feet. “It wasn’t like I wanted to–”

“Oh like hell you did.” you say, turning to face him. “Four years, Jisung. I waited four years and you just– you come back and decide to tell me about some make-believe bullshit to save yourself and feel less guilty about the fact that you left.”

“It wasn’t make-believe to me,” he argues. “It was real. Everything I said was real. I left and I tried for years to make something of myself so I could come back here and get you.”

“Oh so it’s my fault? I made you leave, is that it?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“So then say something else!” you yell. The stars rumble, threatening to fall out of the sky. “Say something else, then, Jisung. Why didn’t you call? Huh?”

“Because I–” he stops, licks his lips. “God. Fuck. I couldn’t face you if I had nothing to show for myself, okay? It wasn’t fair to you for me to leave you behind just so I could fail.”

“Ha!” you laugh, running a hand through your hair in disbelief. “So you decided to go radio silent instead? Decided to not only leave me alone but let me suffer and wonder about where you were because that’s so much better than telling me that you were struggling, right? Great choice, Jisung. Really.”

He blinks a few times, watching as you pace back and forth in the grass. 

Anger bubbles deep in your gut. This whole time, he knew. It was a conscious decision. Jisung deliberately didn’t contact you because he chose not to.

“Did you ever even love me?”

The words tumble out before you can stop them. Jisung’s entire body goes rigid, his face falling and eyes hardening within a fraction of a second.

“Watch what you say.” he says, his voice low in his chest.

“I wouldn’t have to if you’d just be honest.”

“I’m trying.” he pleads. His eyes are glossy. Big and round behind his glasses. Illuminated by the moon. 

“I fucked up, okay? I prioritized myself and the way I felt over you and fucked everything up. But I tried. I tried so fucking hard. And I’m sorry it took me so long but I wanted– no–  I needed to make sure that I had everything figured out before I came back. I promised I would.”

“No, Jisung, you promised me that–”

“I’m not talking about you.” he says then, taking a deep breath. “You weren’t the only one I made promises to back then.”

Before you have a chance to speak, Jisung says, “I promised her. I told her I’d get you out of here. That I’d give you a life that you deserved, because she knew she couldn’t.”

You drop to your knees when the first sob hits, the force of it racking your body so hard you feel like you’re drowning. Jisung catches you on the fall, holds you up, lets you bury your face into his neck like he had so many times before.

“She told me you believed in forever. She wanted me to give that to you. I’m sorry it took me so long.”

Jisung lets you cry. He holds you through the storm, your wails as loud as thunder and tears as heavy as rain. Four years in the making; the sky and the earth colliding until the dirt and layers of sediment give way to the molten core that’s been hiding beneath the surface all along.

Pain. Grief. All of it pent up and leading to this moment. 

“You should’ve told me.” you cry, beating a fist into Jisung’s chest. “You idiot. You fucking idiot. You should’ve told me.” 

Jisung pulls you in closer, takes each hit as long as it means that it’ll soften the blow on your heart. He whispers apologies in your ear, runs a hand through your hair. 

When it quiets again, the worst of the storm gone, he shifts so that your head is in his lap, his legs crossed and tucked beneath him. A few stray tears wet the fabric of his jeans, your eyes focused on the field of flowers across the street.

“I won’t ask you to come with me.” he says after a long while, when your breathing has evened out. “I know that things are different. You have a life here that you’ve made for yourself, responsibilities to bear as well.”

He pauses to push a few strands of hair out of your face. His fingers are gentle against the skin of your cheek.

“But I promise it’ll be different. I spent too long away from you, was too selfish for my own good. I won’t disappear again. I’ll call every day. I’ll visit. You’ll get every part of me that I kept away from you all this time, and I’ll get every part of you in return.”

Your heart thrums. The thought of having what you’ve wanted for so long. Of having Jisung.

“And when you’re ready, when you feel like you can’t do it anymore, there’ll be a place for you.”

His voice is firm. Confident. More sure than he’s ever sounded before in his life.

When you turn to face him, he’s already staring back. Jisung, with all the stars in his eyes and a heart full of dreams. Jisung, with the world at his fingertips and the offer to make it yours.

Under the apple tree, Jisung leans down and kisses you for the first time. Twenty four years in the making, soft and slow, his lips a perfect fit against yours. A starboy and his flower girl. His glow is so bright it makes blossoms sprout from her fingertips.

Soft curls tickle your eyelids when he pulls away to rest his forehead against yours. You reach up to run a hand through them, smiling softly when he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose. 

“I love you.” you say first this time. 

He reaches out a hand, closes it over your fist that’s still clutching the guitar pick. A marigold and a tulip, both working together to make a perfect harmony. 

“I love you, too.” Jisung whispers back. “Forever.”

Jisung stops by the shop early to say goodbye.

There’s less tears this time, less of a reason to be sad. But still, when he wraps his arms around you, vanilla filling your nose and curls against your face, you feel your composure crumble.

“Every day.” he says, repeating the same thing he did all night. “I promise. Morning and night. Also at lunch. Oh, and on your days off. Matter of fact, you can call when you’re on the toilet too.”

The last part earns him an elbow to the ribs, his laughter bubbling up and out of his throat as he tries to dodge any and all subsequent attacks.

He kisses you stupid before he goes, Chan rolling his eyes from his car out front. You flip him off blindly, Jisung’s lips still attached to yours, earning a loud honk in response.

When he leaves, the shop is quiet, the only sound being the buzzing of your phone as Jisung blows it up with text messages the second the car pulls away.

You’re too busy replying, giggling to yourself when a slew of cute emoticons start appearing one by one, that you nearly fall over out of your chair when Hyunjin bursts through the door.

“Jesus Christ Hyune, did you have to–”

“What the hell are you doing here?” he asks, breathless. 

“Uh,” you blink, glancing round. “Working?”

“Is Jisung not on a damn plane right now?”

“I mean he’s on his way to the airport. Chan is–”

“Chan hyung told me that Jisung wanted you to go with him.” Hyunjin says, brow furrowed.

You sigh. “He didn’t want me to go with him. Well, okay, he did. But I told him I can’t just pick up and leave. He knows that. Nana left this place to me and–”

“You are so stupid.” Hyunjin sighs. 

“Excuse me?” you ask. You stand up, crossing your arms as you walk closer to the counter. 

“Come on. We have to go.”

“Go where, Hyunjin? I’m not leaving to–”

He cuts you off, places an envelope on the wooden surface. “And I am not letting you stay here and pretend that this is what you want.”

“What is that?” 

“A plane ticket.” he says, pushing it towards you. “To Seoul.”

Your mouth opens and closes, lost for words. Hyunjin is already moving around the counter, pushing past you with an expression the most serious you’ve ever seen on him.

“Hyunjin I– I can’t– where did you even…?”

“Chan hyung has a friend.” he mumbles as he begins pulling stuff out of the office. Your planning notebook, your apron, the picture of your grandma off the wall. All of it thrown into a small box he managed to snag from somewhere off to the side.

“His name is Seungmin or something. Met him out in the tourist hub. Dude’s super rich with tons of miles and apparently owed Chan for a drunken night where he needed to be escorted to his hotel. So thanks to him, you’re leaving.” he explains as he grabs the box with both hands and starts walking towards the door.

“Wait.” you stop him, watching as he turns to regard you with a look that says his patience is running thin. 

“I told you I can’t leave, Hyunjin. This place is where I need to be.”

He huffs, places the box on the ground in front of him. His hair falls in waves around his face, a shimmery dark brown beneath the rays of the sun poking into the room. 

“Can you be honest with me?” he asks. 

You nod, slowly. 

“Do you love him?”

Hyunjin watches you with careful eyes. Reads you like a book, something he’s always been good at. You don’t doubt that it’s written on your face. Star-kissed cheeks and eyes as bright as marigolds. 

“So much that it hurts, Hyune.”

Hyunjin smiles, eyes watery. “Then you deserve to go. You deserve your chance to be free. Don’t worry about this place, I’ll take care of it.”

The familiar sting of tears sits behind your eyes. Your heart swells full of love for this friend, this light, this beacon of unconditional love in the shape of your best friend.

“I don’t have clothes.” you manage to say around the lump in your throat.

Hyunjin shakes his head, tears spilling down the bridge of his nose. 

“I’ll send them to you.”

“There’s a lot to do around here for just one person. What if you need me?”

“I’ll manage.” 

You round the corner quickly, throwing yourself into his chest. He catches you with ease, wraps his arms around your body as the both of you cry into each other.

“I’ll miss you.” you say weakly.

Hyunjin’s throat bobs against the top of your head. “I’ll always be here in our little corner of the world.”

The two of you stay like that for a while. Hyunjin’s warmth seeps into your skin, lights you ablaze. By the time he pulls away, his hands on your shoulders, you feel like you’re floating. Unreal.

“I don’t have a way to get there.” you say quickly, glancing at the clock. 

Jisung’s plane leaves soon. The airport, the only one on the island, is a thirty minute drive. You’re at a disadvantage the more time you spend not moving. 

“Don’t worry,” Hyunjin chuckles. “I’ve got that taken care of.”

You open your mouth to ask him what he means when you’re cut off by the sound of honking from outside. Confused, you run to the door, your jaw dropping as soon as you realize who’s waiting for you.

“Hurry up people we don’t have all day!” Jeongin calls, his upper body hanging out of the window. He’s parked outside in a beat-up truck, arms waving wildly when he spots you.

“Innie!” you scream, pushing through the door to run at him. He jumps out of the truck just in time for you to barrel into his chest, laughter loud in your ears as he spins you around. 

“You’re here! Oh my god I thought you weren’t coming for another two weeks.” you say in disbelief once he puts you down.

He looks older, more sophisticated. His hair is rusted and falls past his ears, the ends just barely touching his shoulders. 

“Yeah, well,” he shrugs. “I figured I’d show up earlier. You know, see you before you leave, catch up with my parents, help Hyunjin break into your house. The usual.”

“Help Hyunjin break into my what–” you say, but you stop when your eyes fall on the small suitcase in the backseat. Your own bag, the one that’s been sitting in your closet untouched for years now.

“For the last time,” Hyunjin says from behind you, carrying the box in his arms. “It’s not breaking and entering if I have a key. Which, by the way, I told you would come in handy one day.”

He sets the box down next to the luggage and dusts his hands on his pants. When he turns to face you, he’s smiling, eyes disappearing into crescent moons.

With tears threatening to spill once again, you stare at the both of them, your heart bursting at the seams. “I love you guys.”

Jeongin grimaces, opts for getting back in the driver’s seat as you laugh. Hyunjin rolls his eyes and ushers you inside of the truck.

“Yeah, yeah. Save it.” he says. “Right now, you have a plane to catch.”

The airport is crowded. 

There are tons of people everywhere, some saying hello and some saying goodbye. Hyunjin explained the gate system to you before you left him and Jeongin on the curb, and you keep glancing down at your ticket to make sure none of the information has changed in the past thirty seconds since you last looked. 

Thankfully, your gate isn’t far. With twenty minutes to go until boarding, you can feel the sweat building up beneath the hand that’s curled around your suitcase handle. 

It’s scary thinking about the fact that this is it. That you’re finally leaving. 

It’s bittersweet, too. There’s an excitement in the pit of your stomach as well as a feeling of dread in your chest, both of them meeting in the middle somewhere. 

You let your eyes scan the crowd, searching for wavy hair and thick-rimmed glasses. However, the first thing you see is the familiar neck of a guitar, strapped right on to a back that you would know and recognize anywhere without warning.

Jisung is seated near the gate, his eyebrows furrowed and lips set in a pout as he glares down at his phone. You realize that he’s probably wondering why you won’t answer, why all of his emoticons are going ignored. 

Quietly, you come up behind him, reach into your pocket, and say, “Excuse me? I think you dropped this.”

Jisung startles, his eyes falling on to the guitar pick being held out in your hand. Slowly, he lets his gaze follow upwards, wide-eyed and shocked.

“What– what are you doing here?” he asks. 

You place the pick in his hand. “I'm on my way to Seoul. There’s a guy there that I’ve been trying to find for a while.” you say. 

Jisung catches on quickly. “Oh, really?” he asks, moving over so you can sit beside him. “This guy must be pretty great if you’re leaving for the mainland.”

The rain starts hitting the tarmac outside right as you sit down. “Hm, yeah. He is. He really likes the stars. He says that he found a way for me to live in them, too.” 

He laughs, the sound making your stomach flip. “Sounds like you’re excited.”

You nod. “I am. He promised me that we’d do a lot together, experience new things. Apparently he’s gonna write songs and I’m gonna be a nerd.”

Jisung snorts and reaches across to link his hand with yours.

“He’s really lucky.” he says, leaning over to plant a kiss on your lips.

You smile into it. “So am I.” you whisper into his mouth, your heart stuffed to the brim with flower petals. 

And when Jisung smiles back, his other hand coming up to cup your cheek and give you another kiss with the force of a thousand suns, you feel the key you’d been searching for finally click into place. 

Salt of the earth. Soil and stardust. A boy who glows so bright that his girl sprouts blossoms from her fingertips. 

Forever isn’t promised. But then again, with Jisung by your side, there are things you know for certain:

It’s February. The tulips are in bloom. In Jeju– it rains.

And no matter what, despite all odds, you and Jisung will always find your way back to each other in the place where marigolds grow.

[tags: @skzstarnet @snowyquokka @palindrome969 @summergirlsmj @n1staytiny @drhsthl @strwbrrychannie @shays-library @giuliadesu @iknowyouknowminho @linocz @pynchkilledme @jisunglyricist @itsgghowitsgg @alician87 @skzms @meloncremesoda @ilychee08 @allaboutsan @legally-lixs @stayceebs97 @candyquokka @chans1aptop @liknws @realrintaro @beeracha @vxllxnsworld @feelikecinderella @caitxx1 @lilac13 @sebastianswhore13 @classiclitandmemes @hyunverse @linosazuna @lastgreatamericandynasty1 @bubbly-moon @cookiesandcreammy ]

[222low]

friends to lovers !!! with jisssssunng yippppppie

jisung texts ⋆🐾°

— friends to lovers w/ jisung !!

content: fluff, refers to reader as ‘girlfriend’, not proofread

REQS OPEN

a/n: i slowly feel my disappearance era coming back...but i will try to stay for u all :3

REQS OPEN

[soobnny]

don’t be a stranger — han jisung.

trope. friends to lovers. college au. u live in the same apartment floor. fluff. part 2 to meet odd.

synopsis. you really need to stop meeting han jisung under odd circumstances or alternatively, i accidentally locked myself out of my apartment and you’re offering that i sleep at yours for the night?

word count. 4.3k words

warnings. mentions of that sex-addict neighbor from the first part, mentions of killing bees, and i think nothing after that except for a few curse words

note. this can definitely stand alone but for it to make more sense, read the first fic here! i’ve finally decided to write a part 2 after popular demand, i hope this was ok!

A lot has changed since that night at the rundown convenience store with Han Jisung.

For one, your shared neighbor had moved out after the person living in front of her finally had enough of her. Guess they had more courage to confront the problem than you and Jisung combined.

This meant that the solace of your dorm was finally yours again, and you couldn’t be happier for the return of silence and comfort. Since then, you’ve officially said goodbye to Seungmin’s couch and your noise canceling headphones.

And Jisung.

With no reason to leave your dorm at ungodly hours in the morning anymore, the chances of seeing each other grew significantly low until you were back to small “hi”s and “hello”s.

Sadly, letting go of that neighbor had apparently been a package deal with lesser opportunities to talk to Jisung too.

You hate to admit your disappointment in your lack of interaction after that night. While only a month has gone by, that’s still 30 whole days without that shift in your interaction that you thought you’d bear witness to. That night you’d spent with him was a moment you enjoyed and cherished, and you would’ve hoped he felt the same way.

Similarly, Jisung’s been dejected at the lack of you in his life. He bares no shame in admitting that he had, not once, not even twice, but tried multiple times to gather enough courage to knock at your door just to ask you how you’ve been and if you’d like to hangout with him again — sometimes with a tub of ice cream, sometimes with a cup of coffee he had made for you prior.

Like today.

Han Jisung finds his fist ghosting over your door, hot cup of coffee in hand. Knock, just knock on their door, it’s not that hard. Why is it so hard for him?

He stands there for 2 minutes, studying every fragment of wood on your door.

In that time, he overthinks his actions — do you even drink coffee? Maybe the cup he had prepared wasn’t your preference? He should’ve just gotten the same brand of ice cream you shared that night. Did you want to talk to him again?

Cursing to himself, he trashes the cup yet again after having fallen prisoner to his social awkwardness.

Han Jisung has always had trouble making any type of first move. Truthfully, he was only ever able to gather enough courage to ask you out on that walk because the glint in your eyes was so bright after having laughed with him over your shared situation.

And maybe because he was a little sleep-deprived and you looked really pretty sitting next to him, and you were talking to him like you’ve known each other forever.

Something so humanizing tends to bring people together in weird ways, and that’s what had happened that night.

Now, however, with no reason to spend time with you, Jisung has trouble wondering if you had the same eagerness to talk to him again.

Do male leads in romantic comedies also have a hard time talking like he does? He supposes he could always ask Changbin even if he’d be teased and laughed at in good spirit.

Han Jisung would brave through it if it meant getting useful advice to speak to you again.

For now, with the trashed coffee cup, he retreats back to his own room.

Perhaps he could try again tomorrow.

Jisung recognizes your voice just as the elevator doors open.

He had just gotten back to your apartment after another late night session at the gym with Changbin and Chan — it was their only shared time together, so workouts were always scheduled at night.

With a gym bag slung over his shoulder, he’s about to turn the corner to where your rooms are when he hears you.

Your voice has always been recognizable to him, but this time something else was laced with the way you’re speaking. It isn’t hard to place it as stress, which makes the boy peek in curiosity and concern.

“Seungmin, pick up. Seungmin, pick up. Seungmin! Thank god. Are you at your dorm right now?”

There’s muffled sounds at the end of the line, but your stress seems to grow more and more as the conversation continues. It’s evident in the way your grip tightens around your phone, and you’re pacing back and forth hurriedly, and the way your hand repeatedly moves to run through your hair.

Turns out, Seungmin isn’t at his dorm. He’s gone home for the long weekend, but he tells you Jeongin might be there.

He’ll have to get back to you on that in a couple hours though because Jeongin has a night lecture, and Seungmin can only contact him after that.

Maybe you could kill a few hours in the main lobby – it wasn’t like you were new to that.

Hanging up, you jump back when you see Jisung standing at the end of the hallway, waving shyly at you and bowing in apology.

“Sorry, I must’ve looked like a creep just standing there. I didn’t wanna disrupt the conversation by passing by… I swear, I’m not a creep.”

With a boyish smile, he continues. “I purposefully didn’t pass by because it felt serious. Just in case I ruin the mood by passing by.”

You laugh. “No, it’s okay. You just scared me. How have you been, Jisung?”

Jisung.

He wants you to call him Hannie again.

Still, despite the downgrade in nicknames, he thanks Whomever is Above for the opportunity to talk to you again, even if it was just for a few minutes outside your apartment room.

“I’m great! Just got back from the gym.” He gestures at his bag abashedly, biting down at his lips to control his overenthusiastic tone when talking to you before looking back at you. “Though, I should really ask how you are. You sounded pretty stressed just now.”

“Ah, I was being silly and accidentally locked myself out of my apartment. And I can’t get the spare key from the landlord until tomorrow at earliest. And Seungmin isn’t at his apartment right now, so it’s a whole disaster.”

It’s easy to talk to Jisung about your problems. You feel the same sentiment that nothing ever sounds crazy to Jisung, and it certainly helps that you’ve been through hell and back together trying to survive your previously shared neighbor.

Being locked out of your apartment was basically nothing in comparison to sharing ice cream at the main lobby because your neighbor enjoys having really loud sex.

On the other hand, Jisung has his own conflict in his head.

He’s going over whether it was appropriate or not to invite you over. He could feel his heart pounding straight out of his chest, similar to how it feels when his knuckles are ghosting over your door in attempt of a knock.

“Well… if you really had no other option. You know, my apartment’s just there. And open… for you to stay at, if you want. If you really had no other option, since it’ll be more convenient to you. I’m sorry, is this weird? I’m sorry, forget I said anything.”

Han Jisung is stuttering over his words as he speaks to you, but you think you get the gist of what he’s trying to offer. “No, it’s okay! I wouldn’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable since it’s your space.”

You think he’s feeling pressured to offer since you had shared your problem with him, but you don’t know he’s more than willing to help you out. While Jisung prefers his solitude, he thinks a change of pace for the night wouldn’t hurt.

“I wouldn’t be uncomfortable at all. Actually, maybe YOU would feel uncomfortable, but if you aren’t then it’s really fine!” Then, it’s that boyish smile again and the shy scratching of the nape of his neck and the gentle rock back and forth.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Positive!”

He ushers you towards his door, repeatedly telling you that it was no problem for him. And just when he’s about to let you in, he falters.

“Oh… actually.” Jisung remains standing in front of his door, unmoving, hand with his keys hovering over the doorknob. “Can you give me a minute?”

“Uh, sure!” You smile at him sweetly, and then he pushes his key into the keyhole, angling the door just enough so you can’t see anything before slipping into his room.

And then a string of curses follows, and a few stumbling?

His footsteps are loud as he rushes around his room, picking up every piece of clothing and dunking them into his laundry bin. His heart drops to his stomach when he catches his boxers lying on the ground, thankful he had come to his senses before letting you come in blindly.

Close one.

With the wrappers of food thrown out and his dirty clothes back in the hamper, Jisung feels more comfortable letting you in. Reopening the door again, he peeks out to check if you’re still there. “Hi.”

“Hi.” You tilt your head, smiling at the sheer cuteness of Han Jisung and his poked out head from the door and the small ‘hi’ he had addressed to you paired with the cutest smile that accentuates his round cheeks.

“It might be a little messy right now, I hope you don’t mind.” He pouts, opening the door enough to let you in, hands behind his back as he scans your reaction nervously.

His apartment space wasn’t any different than yours, probably the same size, but the way he had decorated his living space was so potently Han Jisung – like a room captured directly from his image. It’s not the neatest, but by all means, it wasn’t messy at all. It was a little chaotic in the way it’s decorated, and there’s a whole mini studio setup in the corner of his room, but it all felt like he had taken a piece of his home and brought it with him in this apartment.

What’s even more adorable is the obviousness of the rushed cleaning that had happened minutes prior. You can see some random things poorly hidden around the house, but you’re too busy feeling flustered to think about it much.

“Oh, it looks so home-y. It feels very you.”

A familiar heat climbs onto Jisung’s features at the compliment that slips out of your mouth so easily, and he suddenly feels more proud of his decorating.

He hadn’t always been the most confident in his living space, only inviting his closest friends over because his place was always deemed the most messy of them all possibly due to his chaotic decorating (and because he liked to keep his things lying around where it’s easier to access – to his downfall as he always forgets where he had put his things later on).

But, the small genuine compliment from you had lifted his worries and now he feels he should invite his friends more often.

“Do you want some water? I’ll get you a glass.” As he navigates through the kitchen, you politely settle yourself on his couch and continue to look around at the artwork littering his walls. It’s signed “Hwang Hyunjin” at the bottom, and they’re absolutely beautiful.

Sounds familiar, you think.

“What did you eat for dinner?”

You snap out of your reverie at his question.

“Actually… I haven’t eaten dinner yet.”

“What?” He rushes over to you with the glass of water, looking at you with wide eyes. All you can do is smile at him sheepishly. “You haven’t eaten yet? Why? Were you busy today?”

“I was probably just gonna eat some instant ramen when I arrived.”

Although he does the same, he can’t help but scold you. “Eat your meals well, you have to eat a lot. Come on, I’ll order us some food.”

“Do you have any recommendations?” You scoot closer to where he’s seated, peeking at his phone as he scrolls through food applications to order for you.

“Hmm.. if you mix seaweed soup in rice and have it with radish kimchi, it’ll fill you up well.” He thinks with a lot of consideration, running over all the options that could replenish your hunger, and ultimately deciding on what he’s been loving lately.

“Let’s have that then.”

You nod your head, and move to return the empty glass of water in his kitchen. Jisung instantly misses your warmth from when you were inches beside him on the couch.

You’re driving him insane.

You drive him a little more insane when you don’t return from the kitchen right away. He makes his way to where you’re standing, but it seems that you’re staring at nothing in particular. With the empty glass on the counter, Jisung doesn’t understand why you’re just staring at the wall in horror.

“(Name)? What’s wrong?”

Your head snaps to the direction of Jisung’s voice. He’s looking at you with curiosity, and you can feel the heat radiating from your face. “I just realized I don’t have any clothes with me.”

“Oh! Don’t worry. You can just wear some of mine.”

Fuck, you feel so embarrassed, but Jisung is making it seem like it’s nothing – like he’s doing you a simple favor, and not the complexity entangled in staying at his for the night. Comfort is unknowingly wrapped around you in everything that Han Jisung does.

“Okay, I laid out some clothes in the bathroom. Just there.” He points at a door before directing his eyes back at you. “You can go take a shower if you’d like, while we wait for the food.”

You nod, thanking him again, but he simply brushes you off with that bright smile. He even hands you an extra toothbrush from his cabinets.

Jisung doesn’t know how he acted so nonchalant while lending you his clothes, because right now, as you emerge from the bathroom with a towel in hand, drying your hair, he feels like he’s about to explode at the sight of you in his clothes.

He knows his face is fully red right now. There’s no way to fight in, not when his shirt and sweatpants were practically swallowing you whole. He feels something akin to when you had messily eaten your ice cream on the walk back home from the convenience store, and he finds himself mumbling to himself. “Cute.”

“How do I look?” You laugh, flailing your limbs around to show the excess of material moving past your feet, and how his sleeves are down to your elbows. Before he has the chance to stutter over his own words in an attempt of a compliment, his phone begins to buzz.

“Must be the food.” He says, and you move to help him grab the takeout containers from outside. Settling them on the table, you move to grab your wallet from your bag.

Jisung blames it on his exhaustion from the gym, but a schoolboy giggle escapes him before he can hold it back the moment he spots the keychain he had won you a month ago still attached to your wallet.

“Don’t worry. I’ve already paid.” He moves to shove your wallet back down from your bag, and he feels himself physically malfunction when you pout up at him. “That’s not fair. Next time, I’m paying, okay?”

Next time.

Han Jisung cannot count the number of times you have made his heart do a backflip.

Over dinner, you talk about a multitude of topics – never running out of things to say. You realize it’s always been like this with him. You always have a lot to talk about, and you don’t feel scared or nervous to talk about anything.

Similarly, Jisung’s feeling giddy at how he feels he can tell you anything, so he does. He likes the laughter and giggles he elicits from you everytime he tells you a funny story. He also likes your efforts to pitch in with your own stories, feeling lucky you’re entrusting him with pieces of your life like that.

“Actually, in 6th grade, I was kind of a bully. I was kind of mean… but I was only mean because there was this girl who was SUPER mean to Seungmin so I had to get back at her.”

“Hmm?” He pushes you to continue your story, looking at you attentively as he chews on his food, following along your every word.

“So what I would do is, I’d step on bees right. I’m so sorry to the bees, I was young and naive. But, I stepped on them and I’d pick them up and put them in a plastic bag, right?” You smile mischievously, recounting the story in your head.

“Don’t tell me.” Jisung dramatically gasps, pointing a chopstick at you.

“Oh, but I did. I put the plastic bag in her locker! Yeah, I was kind of a psycho.”

He laughs, the wholehearted, head thrown back, thigh slapping kind of laugh as he looks at you in disbelief. But your story warms him – to know that even when you were still so young, you had already gone through extreme lengths to protect the people close to you.

In exchange for your story, he tells his own too. He recounts a story of when he had eaten spicy yuptteok without realizing it.

“I learned about the spiciness of life that day. Now, I’m scared of spicy food.”

He allows himself a quick glance at you from time to time whenever the familiar sound of a throaty laughter is bubbling from you, just before he finishes his story. Nothing feels more accomplishing than your genuine reactions and opinions to his stories.

You listen to him. You listen to every single word without fail.

You still listen an hour later while you’re seated on the couch, exchanging stories with each other.

Though, it’s interrupted for a moment when your phone begins to ring, and Seungmin’s face pops up on the screen. He must have an update on Jeongin already as it had been hours past the last time you had ringed him.

Swiping the call button, you answer with the intent to tell him that your living situation for the night has been solved.

“Jeongin’s at the dorm now, if you’re not already sleeping outside your apartment door.” Seungmin is so unserious in the way he says this so nonchalantly, like he has no remorse if you were out on the streets.

You know better though.

“It’s alright. I’ve sorted it out! Thanks again Seungmo.”

“Oh? Where are you staying? Is it safe?” His concern peeks out just a little bit at your words, and he proceeds to tell you it really isn’t a problem if you crashed at their dorms again. Besides, you could sleep on his bed this time, instead of that couch you hate so much.

Seungmin makes another mental note to replace his couch the next time you lock yourself out of your apartment.

“It’s safe, so don’t worry.”

“I’m not worrying.”

“Sure you aren’t.” You giggle.

Then, he hangs up.

You wonder what Seungmin would say if he found out you were at Jisung’s — not that you could ever willingly admit that out loud without stuttering and blushing an intense amount. He’d definitely say something stupid, so you’re almost thankful he doesn’t push at the topic of where you’re staying too much.

You value that he trusts you.

The rest of the night, you and Jisung stay on the couch, unmoving from your positions. Sometimes, you’d chat about stupid things, sometimes you’d scroll through Youtube videos on his laptop – pranks gone wrong, puppies, banned commercials, random videos from years ago.

He’s convinced he could talk all night just to make you keep laughing, and everytime you do laugh, he’s hit with just how beautiful you are, and he feels his heart explode every single time. He can certainly get used to that sound.

It feels so easy with you. Talking, laughing, everything feels so easy with you to the point where it’s scary. What was going to happen after tonight? Would you go back to merely acknowledging each other in the hallways? Would it take another odd circumstance to cross your paths again? Would you stop directing your laughter to his stories? Would all of that have to disappear again?

“Jisung? You okay there?” He blinks out of his own thoughts, looking at you intently before realizing the video you had been viewing had long ended and he was simply staring at a blank screen.

“Just thinking about those poor bees.” He lies straight through his teeth.

“You are so mean.” You hit him playfully, and he grabs your elbow before you can hit him again, laughing down at you. His breath hitches at the sudden close proximity, and he’s letting out nervous coughs while extracting his hand back to himself.

And then you yawn, and Han Jisung feels himself melt into a puddle.

“We should probably head to bed. Take my bed, I’ll sleep on the couch.” He helps you up from the couch, ghosting his arm on the small of your back in case you stumble in your sleepiness.

“It’s your apartment, I can’t kick you out of your bed like that.” You shake your head, planting your feet on the ground so he can’t move you.

“It’s really fine.”

“You’re not changing my mind, Han Jisung. Plus, you couldn’t possibly fit comfortably on this tiny couch. I’d fit right in.”

He sighs in defeat, mumbling a ‘fine’ which makes you grin.

“Let me get you some pillows and a blanket.”

The moment feels strangely intimate as he carefully places some of his pillows and a warm comforter on the couch to make sure you’re comfortable for the night. His eyes are slightly droopy from the exhaustion, but he’s determined in his task.

Han Jisung has definitely taken firm root in your heart, and you hope he stays around in your life forever.

“Do you need anything else?” He had taken it upon himself to tuck you in, and he feels the same suffocating feeling on his chest when you smile up at him in thanks, accompanied by a shake of your head.

He thinks he has a good idea what this feeling is.

“Okay. Goodnight.” Your heart just about melts in your chest at his words. You’ve never heard him speak so softly before with his eyes a little hooded and a gentle smile on his face, with his heart on his sleeve like that for you.

“Goodnight, Hannie.”

Jisung turns off the lights and almost falls when retreating to his own room at the mention of your old nickname for him. It’s a shame you can’t see the lovesick smile he has on his face while regaining his balance.

You don’t recognize where you are at first when you wake up.

When the sunlight hits your face enough to pull your eyelids open, you’re thinking – this definitely doesn;t look like my room.

Stirring slightly, a yawn leaves your lips as you sit up to try and process everything that had transpired the night before. When you remember Jisung and his gentle smile and his crinkled eyes, you almost fall off the couch.

“Good morning!” Your eyes meet his cheery ones, drinking in the details of his features; messy hair that suggests he’s also just gotten out of bed, slightly puffy eyes, clothes from the night prior.

“Good morning.” You peel yourself off of the comforter, walking with him to the kitchen to drink a glass of water.

“How was your sleep last night? Hopefully it’s better than sleeping on your friend’s couch?”

He remembers, and something about that has you biting back a goofy smile this early in the morning.

“It was great. Thanks again for letting me sleep here for the night.” He simply nods his head, eyes still trained on you.

Han Jisung is acting a little strange this morning. While he’s normally this bright and active, it feels like it’s being amplified. He keeps looking at you, in every little thing that you do, and then he looks away when you try to catch his gaze. It feels like he wants to say something, even until you’re bidding him goodbye and thanking him again.

“I’ll return your clothes once I get it in the laundry.” You smile, and he nods his head, but he’s still tapping his foot on the ground excessively fast, bouncing on his feet and walking with you to accompany you outside.

“We seriously have to stop meeting under these weird circumstances.”

Laughing to try and cover up the fact that he can barely pay attention to what you’re saying, he opens the door for you. But can he really allow you to slip through his fingers again?

“Maybe we can meet again soon… tomorrow? For coffee? Under more normal circumstances?” Jisung tries to sound as casual as he possibly can. If you knew better, you’d know he was feeling his most nervous right now – even more nervous than when he had to pass a demo for his classes.

To his luck, you don’t notice the nervous quiver in his voice.

You stop in your tracks at his words, turning to look at him with a smile. The poor boy is falling deeper and deeper, and it’s definitely too late to pull him back up now.

“I’d like that.” You bite down at your lips, glancing up at him with a slight hesitation.

And then you kiss his cheek, and Han Jisung would throw himself out of his window if he could at this moment, running down the streets and screaming in victory.

Instead, he places his hand on his cheek, mouth slightly agape as he stares at your retreating figure.

“Don’t be a stranger, Han Jisung!”

He won’t be.

You’ve reminded him again and again that life and love is here for him to live it, and that’s exactly what he’s going to do.

Starting tomorrow. With coffee. And hopefully another kiss on the cheek by the end of the day.

[choiwonder]

FIRST KISS . HAN JISUNG

tw/cw ༝ 0.8k wc, ummm a little tiny bit suggestive, hints of pining, teasing, making out, my little interpretation of college/frat boy jisung, i am actually going over shakespeare and hamlet in class so i’m lowkey projecting, hyunjin is a cockblocker!!!!

“hey,” han steps aside as he opened the door.

you look around the house, not surprised by the amount of drinks, trash bags and food surrounding the kitchen. being a close friend of hyunjin would initially lead to you being constantly invited to his parties, “hey, where’s hyunjin?”

“he just went out to buy snacks for you guys.”

“oh, okay,” you nod, setting your bag down on the couch. you place your notebook, papers and laptop to prepare for tonight.

“what’re you guys going over tonight?” jisung asks, taking a seat and looking over what you set down on the table.

“shakespearean drama and the tragedy of hamlet,” you sigh, eyes lifting away from your phone and over to his, “we need to discuss the theme, its significance and the relationship of hamlet and horatio.”

han shook his head, leaning back, “so glad i don’t have to deal with that shit anymore. my classes are way better this year.”

“oh, yeah,” you smile, copying the way jisung leaned back on the couch and moved a few inches closer, “i forgot you switched majors… what’re you doing now?”

“dance.”

impressed by his response, your eyebrows raise. han’s lips stretch at your reaction, his body impulsively turning to face you.

“surprised?”

“kinda.”

he feigns offence, “why? what’d you expect?”

“maybe rap or producing,” you laugh as if it was obvious.

while hyunjin always invited you out, jisung was also there and you couldn’t help but admire him from afar. though you knew he was a good dancer, you also took notice at how good he was at rapping, singing and producing music. you were astonished and respected him for being hardworking and remaining humble.

“i know it’s something you’re good at… plus,” you voice drops down to a whisper and your hand aims for him to come closer as if someone was listening to this conversation. han leans over, fulfilling your request when his ear is next to your lips, “you’d look really hot working in a studio.”

jisung leans back, just enough for your faces to be inches apart. he could only smile at your comment, his pearly whites peeking through. his deep brown eyes flicker across the features of your face, solely focusing on the canvas of your lips.

han sucks in a breath, his hand carefully placed on your knee, itching to caress the palette of your thigh, “… do you think hyunjin would care if i kissed you right now?”

“mmmmm…. maybe,” you shrug with a small smile. if hyunjin were to find his two best friends kissing each other he’d likely throw a fit about how weird it is; but that was the least of your concerns, this conversation with jisung was far more important.

jisung falsely pouts, lightly squeezing your cheek, “well that’s too bad,” he pulls away with a sigh, all the warmness drafting from his skin vanished all too soon.

“such a tease,” you huff, rolling your eyes. you knew he wanted you to plead and beg for something as simple as a kiss but your stubbornness was stronger than his desire to see you compliant, “i have homework to do, go away.”

“aw, don’t be like that,” jisung laughs, “here, come, i’ll give you a kiss.”

you roll your eyes again, pushing him away as he tugs on your arm, but he doesn’t budge, his strength completely pulling you towards him. like mere seconds ago, han places his hand on your knee, leaning in close enough his mouth hovers centimeters above yours.

his free hand cups your cheek and you wait for him to make the first move but he does nothing except lean you back against the couch.

you heart thumped out your chest, yearning for this exact moment. you caved just as jisung hoped you would, but he only pulls back by a centimeter to watch you continuously feen for a kiss.

of course, knowing you’d push him away with no qualms of forgiveness, he finally fills the gap that settled between you. is this a dream? you think, feeling and adoring the way he drops his body weight, his knee resting idly between your legs. jisung hums, his hand moving up your thigh and under your shirt.

you quickly grip the back of his head, holding him close to you as he dares to pull away. from what was initially a simple first kiss turned into a mini makeout session. han could only chuckle, his breath intake reaching its limit, “you know i would love to continue but hyunjin’s here…”

a sigh of disappointment left the traces of your lips, you kiss han once more before moving away from him. he smiles, squeezing your cheek, ready to report back to his room, “don’t miss me too much, alright?”

taglist: @luvrhyune @ttyunz @uno7

© choiwonder ༝ do not copy, translate, modify or repost any of my work on any platform, or claim it as your own.

[haekisses]

NCT DREAM TEXTING YOU AFTER YOU ATE THEIR FOOD.

requests are open !

[scarletwinterxx]

please write more of dad!jisung 🥹🥹🥹

helllooo~ i actually got a few dad jisung requests , apologies it took this long but I finally wrote it😊 hope you like it!

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.Keep reading

"What if she cries?"

"Then do something about it?"

"Okay but what do I do?"

You look over your boyfriend and the baby girl in his arms, both looking at you with curiosity in their eyes. "Jisung, that's your daughter. You kept her alive for this long, you'll figure it out"

"Pretty sure we made it this far because of you. You're the brain in this relationship"

Jiwon babbles like she's the one talking to her father, this makes Jisung look down at the baby girl in his arms. Leaning down to boop their noses together, something he knows his daughter loves.

"Stop talking yourself out of getting groceries, it's only a few things and I really need to clean the house, your parents are coming over" you tell him as you put a few things inside her diaper bag, just the essentials incase she needs them while they're out.

When you got pregnant with Jiwon, you admit you felt lost. You and Jisung were still very young. You just turned 20 when you found out, everything that could go wrong already playing in your mind. The only one who talked some sense into you was your boyfriend. Jisung was the voice of reason during that time, he really stepped up and made sure you were taken care of.

First agenda on his list was to get a place for the two of you, the apartment wasn't too big but enough for your small family. The two of you worked remotely so it was perfect when the little one came.

Now your daughter is a year old, she's everything the two of you dreamed of. And even though she came a little earlier than planned, Park Jiwon is the light of both your universe's.

Jisung loved the little human with everything he is, his favorite part is that she looks like you in every way. He must have saved a nation in his past life to be blessed like this, living with the love of his life and the little life the two of you created.

"Here's a bag just in case she needs anything, she got snacks in there. Also packed some for you" you joked, putting the bag on his shoulder.

You laugh as you watch the 6 foot guy holding a pink bag and a baby with the biggest pink bow, "You two are adorable, now go I have some cleaning up to do"

"Wish me luck" he mumbles, giving you a kiss on the forehead before walking towards the front door

"Hey, when someone comes up you and says 'oh my gosh, you're baby's so cute' what do you say?" you call out to him

He rolls his eyes, a smile forming on his lips "She looks just like her momma"

"Damn right she does, now go. Love you both, see you later"

[ljnsdump]

What a Plot Twist You Were (Jisung x F!reader)

Jisung x F!reader

You can't force chemistry to exist where it doesn't, the same way you can't deny it when it does.

Genre: M/F, slight enemies to lovers, fluff, classmates, school setting no mature scenes because im not ready to imagine jisung in those scenes

Warnings: just a lot of bickering and probably cursing here and there, y/n is a spoiled brat

Word Count: 3,999

Hello! A Jisung oneshot because the man finally has an IG acc haha. As always, dont hesitate to give me feedbacks! Enjoy reading!

Read at your own risk.

------

"Y/N, don't make me let you pull out from that modelling." Her mom warns her sternly. "This is your final semester in high school. You'll be graduating soon and you will not be able to do that if you keep this up."

She rolls her eyes, knowing that her teacher is snitching on her again. As they should though. "Ma, it's fine. My grades are enough for me to be accepted in any university."

"No it's not!" She argues and puts the utensils down on the table that caused a loud sound. Y/N's dad holds her as if to calm her down. "Universities would prioritize those with higher grades and has better knowledge on the courses they want to take than you do."

"Whatever, you'll still get them to accept me anyway."

And that's the time both parents realized that they raised a spoiled brat.

It's monday and everybody is in their first class of the day.

"Okay class, as you may know this is your final semester. We will make sure that no one gets left behind so we came up with a way. We will do the buddy system. You guys will be paired up to your buddy and you will be responsible for each other for the rest of the semester. If one doesn't pass, the other will be questioned, so help each other out. If you have topics that are hard for you both, try to come up with ways so you both will be able to understand it. You can always come to me, other teachers and even students."

They all agreed and chose their buddy. Then Y/N and Jisung come into the room at the same time but from different doors. Y/N enters the front door with her ipad and coffee while Jisung comes in from the back with just his pen and a notebook.

Their teacher notices them both. "Oh good. You're both here." She says and looks at them back and forth. "You will be each other's buddy. You will be paired up for all school work for the entire semester. You will be responsible for each other's grades."

"What?" Y/N's eyebrows furrow. She heard what her teacher said perfectly but she just couldn't accept it. "He's not that smart! You're pairing me with someone who can't help me."

"You’re late, Miss Y/L/N. Both of you are. Everyone already chose who they wanted to be their pair. It's just the two of you remaining." She answers with stern voice. "And we tried pairing you up with Yunjin before." Pertaining to their top student in class. "But you ended up just letting her do everything."

Y/N looks at Jisung. "You're not saying anything about this?"

He just shrugs and goes to his seat. Y/N groans and does the same.

"Alright. Listen up. First task."

Jisung was the one who stood up first when class ended. He was about to exit the room when Y/N called him. "Park Jisung!"

He turns with an annoyed look on his face. "What?"

She walks to him. "Why did you not say anything earlier when she paired us? You know well both fail."

"I'm not that bad." He replies that she scoffs.

"Fine! Then what should we do about that stupid reporting?"

"I have to go. Just chat with me about your ideas and whatever." He starts to walk away.

And she follows his strides. "I don't have your number!"

"WhatsApp, Messenger, IG, Twitter." He lists down. "It's 2023."

Y/N scoffs in disbelief.

After class, she meets with her best friend who was with her boyfriend at a cafe nearby. They're both in 12th grade, Ningning is in a different class though.

"Hey, who's your pair?" Ningning, as soon as she sees Y/N.

Y/N groans and rolls her eyes. "Park Jisung."

"That sloppy, rugged soccer player?"

She nods. "Yup." Popping end of the word. "Hey, Jun." Y/N casually greets Ningning’s boyfriend who's playing on his phone.

"Oh, sup Y/N." And offers to bump fists.

She accepts with her fist as well. "Nothing much."

"Okay, let's order first." They all sit. "Love, what do you want?"

"A reuben would do, love." He replies.

They spent the remainder of the day talking about their lives and spilling teas.

When she got home, she decided to try out reading about the topic of their report but just minutes later, she plopped down on her bed because she got bored.

Y/N takes out her phone and decides to look for Jisung's account on messenger.

To: Park Jisung

Hey, what are we gonna do about this?

And she finished having dinner and even went to prepare for bed, he still hasn't replied yet.

To: Park Jisung

Park Jisung!

Still no reply. She runs her fingers over her hair in frustration. Jisung has two close friends, she remembered. Y/N looks up the name Zhong Chenle and the Chinese guy's photo pops up.

To: Zhong Chenle

Hey, just wondering if you're with Jisung. Please tell him to check his phone, we have to work on our project.

Just minutes later, a notification pops up saying she has a new message from Jisung.

From: Park Jisung

What?

Oh my god, he's unbearable, she thought.

To: Park Jisung

The project.

From: Park Jisung

Send me your thoughts and ideas about it.

To: Park Jisung

I have no thoughts nor any idea about it.

From: Park Jisung

Then what are we supposed to do?

To: Park Jisung

Idk, let's just meet up tomorrow after class to figure this out.

"Bro, what the hell." Jisung grunts as he puts his phone down and picks up the xbox controller. "She wants me to meet up with her after class. Why did we get paired up, we have no idea about these."

Jisung is currently in Sungchan's place with Chenle. They're playing video games like how they do every single day and not getting tired of it. "Finally you can get some." Chenle teases him.

"I heard she's double-jointed." Jisung's eyebrows furrow at Sungchan's joke, and looks at him with disgust on his face. While Sungchan and Chenle high five.

Jisung walked to Y/N's seat when their class ended. He watched her gather her things in a hurry and was surprised to see him.

"What?" She asks, forgetting that they planned to meet for their project today.

His eyebrows furrow, confused as well. "I thought we'll meet after class?"

"Oh yeah. About that, meet's cancelled. I have to go. Let's just pay someone to do that report." Then she takes off before he can say anything. Better for him though, he'll have the whole time to play his beloved games.

Y/N meets with her handler in a cafe after driving almost half an hour from the university.

"I'm here." She announces and gives a quick friendly hug from behind to her handler Joy. "Let's go?"

Joy turns to her as she stands up. "Okay, good. Let's go. Our client is very chic and very boss lady vibes, Y/N. She's picky and she definitely knows what she wants."

"That's cool. You know I'm here to impress."

"I do." Joy smiles as they walk fast towards the building across the cafe. "I've sent your file to them already. You've looked over the products that you'll be modelling for?"

"Yes, the jewelleries. I actually even own a couple of pieces from their brand. They're nice."

When they arrive, a tall lady in formal attire welcomes them.

"Hi, I'm Seulgi, Mrs. Laviste's assistant. She's waiting for you in her office."

The local company rents both the 3rd and 4th floors of the building for their offices and manufacturing facilities.

They arrive at the office, the woman stands up upon seeing them with a big smile to greet. "Welcome to Ligaya! I'm Flora Laviste, you can call me Mrs. Laviste." Offering her hand which Joy gladly took.

"This is my talent." Joy gestures to Y/N. "Y/N."

Y/N smiles and shakes hands with her as well. "Y/N Y/L/N."

"From what I heard, you're the youngest of Mr. And Mrs. Timothy Y/L/N, is that right?"

"Yes." She smiles. "Yes, I am."

They discuss for a few minutes in Flora's office then go to their in-house studio to shoot a few shots as a demo just for them to see how their products would look on her.

"We reviewed everything and we've decided to take you guys on your offer. She's very good." Nodding her head, applauding Y/N's skills. "We'll do the shoot on Saturday morning."

Friday came and it's time for them to present their report. Y/N came early to school to get the report she paid a college student for.

Holding the flashdrive in her hand, she thanks Yeri. "Thanks a lot Yeri! I really just can't do this on my own."

Yeri smiles. "No worries, Y/N. It was easier for me since we've been over the topic a couple of times already. I sent the file to you too through email."

Y/N sat beside Jisung when she arrived in their classroom. She specifically instructed him to come in early. "We just read what's on the presentation." She tells him.

His eyes shift, obviously in doubt. "Sure?"

"Yeah."

"Park and Y/N, you're up." Their teacher announces after the pair prior to them were done with theirs.

They set up on the computer and in no time, the first page of the slide flashes on the white board through the projector. 

"Our topic, the three main classes of carbohydrates." Y/N starts. She then continues to casually read the passages on the PowerPoint presentation which raises a brow of their teacher.

She stands up from her desk and walks towards the center walkway. "Pause, Ms. Y/L/N." The teacher raises her index finger. "You can't just click continuously on those pages without discussing them."

Y/N immediately protests. "But Mrs. Lim, these are self-explanatory."

"Good, then please explain them." She crosses her arms. "And Mr. Park, don't just stand there. Help out your buddy."

The two groans silently upon hearing their teacher's statement. Then Y/N looks at Jisung. "Help me explain it."

"You said it's self-explanatory." He whispers.

"I didn't think she'd let us explain it still after I said that."

After a few minutes of waiting and just looking at the two infront murmuring at each other, Mrs. Lim figures out they got nothing. "Alright, you two. Something's making me think that you both did not make this. I'm gonna let you re-do it this weekend and when we come back on Monday, I want you both to be able to explain and discuss it properly or else this reflects on my record book. Understand?"

Y/N grunts and removes her things from the desk to go back to her seat.

"Let's meet tomorrow morning." Jisung tells her.

"Can't, I have something very important. Afternoon."

"I have something important to do in the afternoon."

Y/N throws her pen to the floor, stomping her feet like a little kid throwing tantrums. "Why did we ever agree to this?!"

Jisung stands tall in front of her with a serious look on his face. "Don't throw tantrums on me, Y/N." He warns with his deep ass voice. "I'm not one of your maids."

"I-I didn't think you were." She nervously replies, blinking and shying away from his eyes. "I was just upset."

"Let's meet tonight."

"Mine or yours?"

"Mine."

At 7pm, Y/N arrives at the convenience store near Jisung's apartment. She immediately texts him.

To: Park Jisung

I'm here.

Hey!

Dude!

Park Jisung!

It's very cold here.

I'm gonna kill you.

8 minutes later

From: Park Jisung

Just hang on.

To: Park Jisung

I've been hanging on you idiot.

3 minutes later

From: Park Jisung

I'm coming down.

He, in his black hoodie and sweatpants approaches her and she almost had a heart attack. He looks like a kidnapper on his fit, the only thing that made her realize it is him is his nose. Weird.

"You look scary." She tells him.

He shrugs. "Yeah? Well... let's go."

They start to walk, her, following him from behind.

"Walk slowly."

"This is my normal pace. Your legs are just short."

Y/N stops and crosses her arms while watching him walk away. He did not notice until he finally crossed the road. He looks back and Y/N is still on the other side, glaring at him. Jisung can't help but laugh and put his hands in the pockets of his hoodie as he waits for the lights to go red again.

From: Park Jisung

Stay there.

Although she's far, he can see clearly that she rolled her eyes after reading his text.

As soon as the red light appears, he runs to her and grabs her wrist lightly, and they cross the street.

"Dickhead." She mumbles.

The apartment is definitely Jisung's, Y/N thought upon getting in. Empty red bull cans, chips packets, everything is everywhere. Chenle and Sungchan are there too, yelling at each other as they play.

Y/N looks at Jisung, suggestively while crossing her arms again.

He sighs. "Come on, guys. You need to go." Telling his two friends.

"What?! I thought we were---" Sungchan stops when he sees Y/N and the look on her face. "Time to go."

Chenle removes the headphones from his head. "So what if she's here, it's not like she's staying long anyway. And besides, bros over hoes."

Jisung immediately smacks his head. "That's the red bull talking."

"Oh yeah, she's the first. I'll consider." Chenle adds and this time Y/N is the one glaring at him.

Once they're out, Jisung kicks things out of the way. "My room is clean." Then walk towards there. And indeed it is. Shoes all over, but not in a messy way but it's on the walls like he's collecting them. And they're not just any shoes, they're all or at least that's how Y/N sees it, Jordan 1s.

Her mouth hangs open when she sees the display. "You collect?"

"Kinda."

Just minutes later, they're set up on the floor with their gadgets on the center table.

Y/N scratches the back of her head, getting frustrated over what they're doing. "This is so stupid. Carbohydrates are carbohydrates, what the fuck are those main classes for?!" She whines.

"Come on, Y/L/N. All we gotta do is read and understand then make a report."

"I wish it's as easy as saying it."

Jisung gets his hand off his keyboard. "It seems like you hate these subjects that we're taking. Why enroll under them?"

"Because they want me to be a doctor. Like any fucking Asian parent wants their kids to be."

"I'm sorry."

"No need to be, it's not you."

They spent the night just talking about random things. She learned that Jisung prefers nights over days. He's got poop hands as what Chenle calls, meaning everything he touches just fails. He and his friends always play PUBG with Chenle's cousins from China. Random things.

But Jisung felt that Y/N is a good listener. She doesn't give her own opinions on his preferences, she finds everything he says cool, and she asks you about how you feel when you make that choice. It's like she's learning new things as they talk.

But they did not make any progress with their report.

It's almost 12 midnight. "I need to go home now." Y/N states after looking at her watch.

"Are you Cinderella or something?" He jokes.

"I have a shoot tomorrow morning. I can't look puffy." She replies. "You can come with me tomorrow morning. We'll work on this slowly."

Tomorrow came. They met at the cafè again. Y/N picked Jisung up from his place.

"Do you always bring other people aside from your own team to your gigs?"

"No. But it's fine. I can just introduce you as one of us."

They arrive and in no time, Y/N is all set. They also discusse sample shots for the campaign. Jisung just observes as he tries to work on their report.

"Your boyfriend's handsome." Mrs. Laviste says, giving her a teasing smile as they look over at him.

Y/N immediately shakes her head. "He's just my classmate. We got paired up for school work."

"He's been glancing and staring at you for the past few minutes."

"That's probably because he's doing everything and I'm here literally looking pretty."

They suit her up in a silk skin tone slip dress pointing focus on the jewelleries on her. A gold butterfly rests in between her clavicles, they take a shot of that. Her hands, her ears, they alternately put pieces of jewelries and take a few shots of it in all angles possible. Jisung couldn't help but stare. She's good. Great, actually. She gives what's needed from her.

"I just got off the phone with our male model. He won't be able to attend, he's suddenly having the flu." Says Mrs. Laviste's secretary.

Y/N lowkey raises her hand just enough to point at Jisung.

Joy tells Y/N, "You should talk to him."

Y/N nods. "Jisung-ah!" Jisung looks up at her. He sees her walking towards him. "We need a male model."

"And?"

"You'd be a great one. You're very tall, and your face is decent, you just need a little makeover."

He shakes his head. "I don't think I can. I just came here to work on our report."

"I'll help you. We have until tomorrow. Plus, the pay is good."

At the end, she was able to convince him to join the shoot. They set him in front of the mirror, Y/N helped out in picking up his fits. She laughs when she sees his eyes moving, afraid to move his body.

"You can move, idiot."

He looks at the makeup artist doing his face. "Really? I don't wanna mess up what they're doing."

"As long as you don't go crazy."

They do the shoot together first just so Jisung loosens up and then his solo shoot after. Y/N helps him a lot aside from the director.

"Jisung-ah, just a stoic face. This is a close up shot emphasizing the earring."

After several flashes, he's all done. Y/N claps her hands then everyone else follows. "Congrats on your first modeling gig!"

He grabs her hand and puts it on his chest. "Feel that? I'm so nervous."

Of course, she was taken aback, she didn't feel shit, just her own heart pounding when her hand landed on his hard chest. "T-That's normal." Then she walks away, face flushing, cleaning up her things.

"What's the plan?" He asks when they're finally out of the building.

"We're gonna get lunch and then go to your soccer practice?"

Jisung shakes his head. "I can just pass on that one. Let's just do the report in my apartment again." She looks him straight in the eye and before she can say anything, he says, "I cleaned up."

Y/N smiles a little. "Okay."

"What do you wanna eat? My treat today." He says, looking at her.

"I'm craving biryani."

"Let's go to Jamieson's then."

And somehow they're eating lunch together, Jisung is skipping practice to do their project together, talking casually unlike before where they just roll their eyes at each other.

Y/N asks while they eat. "So what do you think about the modelling thing?"

He shrugs. "It's cool for my first time. You and your team made it too easy for me."

"And you were pretty good too. You have potential." She puts her hand on her face, posing elegantly, mimicking his poses earlier.

Jisung laughs and immediately removes her hand from her face. "Stop it."

"Why? Wait until Chenle and Sungchan see those photos."

"Oh God." He cringes and ducks head under his hands while Y/N laughs.

They spend the whole afternoon discussing their topic, even arguing if one finds something different in their researches but at the end, they were able to finish up their presentation and are confident that they'll be able to discuss it in front of the class on Monday.

"Thanks, Ji."

And for some reason they found themselves arguing about what comes first, the egg or the chicken. They even did their research on their stands far more efficiently than how they did it first with their report about carbohydrates.

"If I'm right, you'll give me $50?" He taunts.

She pulls out her phone from her purse and counters with, "And if I'm right, I send this pic to your friends." Showing him photos of his shoot that she took without his knowing.

Jisung was about to snatch his phone when she immediately stands up and runs away from him. "Y/N, delete that!"

"No!" She yells back but falls onto the floor by the kitchen. "I can't feel my legs!"

He rushes to her with panic on his face. "What happened?!"

"I think we squatted on the floor for too long." Jisung sighs in relief. "But I still can't feel my legs, it's weird and ticklish."

"What do you want me to do?"

"I dunno, it's really weird. I hate it."

"I'll try to massage it." He looks at her waiting for her approval and she eventually nods, just desperate for the weird feeling on her legs to go away. His hands are huge, she notices. That's why it looked so good in the photos earlier.

"It's going away." Before they stand up, he attempts to steal her phone but she immediately holds it protectively with both her hands. "No, these are mine."

"That's literally me in those photos."

"Yes, I'm aware."

He traps her between both his arms and the kitchen counter. Jisung lowers himself to level with her. "Give me your phone." His voice drops an octave that gives her goosebumps. His voice has always been deep but it's different when it's this deep.

Their faces are almost touching and she blinks a couple of times as her nervousness gets the better of her. "Y-You're too close."

"I know."

"You look good." Out of the blue she says then covers her mouth with one hand.

Jisung chuckles. "You look good too. Really good." She tries to avoid his lingering eyes but she can't. "You like us like this, don't you? That's why you don't wanna give me your phone?"

"I thought I'm the first woman who ever got this close to you?"

"You are."

"It doesn't seem like it."

He gives a small smile. "That's because you make me do things I never knew I'm capable of doing." And her heart skipped a beat, she couldn't say anything. It's like her throat is blocked with something. "And I thought you're one of them strong girls? The type who nobody wants to mess with. You've always had that image but why are you refusing now?"

Y/N grabs him by the neck and crashes her lips with his. Jisung got surprised but started kissing her back until he snaps back to reality.

But she suddenly pushes him away, running to his bedroom to get her things and in no time, she's in her car driving home with her heart pounding in her ribcage. Meanwhile, Jisung remained speechless in the kitchen, no idea as to what exactly happened.

From: Park Jisung

People usually say something and don't just run after they do that, yk?

From: Park Jisung

Don't be a coward now.

To: Park Jisung

Forget that ever happened.

From: Park Jisung

Uh... no

From: Park Jisung

You kissed me first and now you just want me to forget abt it?

To: Park Jisung

Yes

From: Park Jisung

No, in fact, maybe I'll kiss you again tomorrow.

[polarisjisung]

cherry flavoured

profiles [2]

SYNOPSIS | y/n, the campuses notorious heartbreaker, had never been one to settle down, running from the word commitment since the concept had first been introduced to her, but one smile and a little cherry coke seems to do just the trick when she runs into captain of the dance team, park jisung

PAIRING | dancer!jisung x fem!reader

↳jisung | dance major | captain of the dance team

↳jeno | business major | y/n's best friend

↳haechan | criminology major | works at johnny's café off campus

↳jaemin | sports medicine major | captain of the guys basketball team + close with y/n

↳renjun | art major | class president

↳mark | music major| part of the college committee

↳chenle | business major | jisungs best friend

prev | masterlist | next

NOTES: why did no one warn me that writing an smau will completely take over my life, I was literally plotting on my drive to work

[goldendynastys]

now that we don’t talk | hjs

summary: you can’t help but feel upset and reel about the past after your breakup with han jisung. however, after weeks of reflection and loneliness, you come to realize that perhaps you’re better off on your own after remembering how awful it was being on and off with him.

pairing: han jisung x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+, Minors DNI | modern/college au, angst, some fluff, slight smut word count: 9.2k warnings/notes: 1989 taylor’s version is my new obsession and this vault track has been growing on me so here we are, long-haired jisung brought me here okay, stoner! jisung, explicit language, alcohol and marijuana usage, major angst, reader is going through it, mentions of sadness and loneliness, slight fluff, jisung is lowkey an asshole and a terrible boyfriend, mentions of sex and sexual activities, reader gets her shit together and finds closure, i’m pretty sure that’s it but if i miss anything please let me know (i’m new at this), hope you all enjoy reading! <3

disclaimer: all members of Stray Kids are faces and name claims for this story. this is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real life scenarios.

banner made by the lovely @babystrcandy <3

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It was Friday afternoon, and the last thing you wanted to do was meet up for a group project. You and a few other classmates were supposed to be working on some psychology project, analyzing different parts of the brain and how it applies to the work world (you had no clue, it was only assigned to you Wednesday). Your group was supposed to meet yesterday, but of course, one of the members canceled at the last minute, forcing all of you to meet on Friday. Everyone was pissed, to say the least.

The walk to the library was pleasant, if you were being honest. You always loved the spring, how the once dead trees suddenly sprung back to life with healthy leaves and beautiful flowers adorning the branches. The weather was starting to get warmer, which meant you didn’t have to carry around an oversized jacket and gloves all the time. Thank God, cause it came to a point where the freezing cold was starting to bother you. Now you could wear a sweater all on its own and be completely fine. 

You watched as some flower petals blew in the wind, smiling at the image above you. With an iced coffee in your hand, you walked through campus and made your way to the library. After walking in silence amongst the wind, you realized that maybe meeting up for the project today wasn’t so bad after all. The walk seemed to calm you, help you ground yourself after all the negative thoughts that ran through your head previously. You were more motivated to take on the project and get as much work done as possible before heading into a nice, relaxing weekend away from classes. 

Your group decided to secure a study room on the first floor, since you all could talk freely without people trying to quiet down every five minutes. You saw one of your members, Chae-Won, standing outside a room, to which she greeted you by your name and with a wave. “Hey, Chae-Won. Has anyone else come?” You ask her.

“Yeah, we’re all here. We were doing homework separately here earlier and it took us less than five seconds to find each other,” Chae-Won explained, knowing you would feel bad for being the last one to show up and keep everyone waiting. You both walked into the study room and took your respective seats.

The time you spent preparing for this project went by so quickly, as it was already three in the afternoon and everyone was starting to leave for the night. Your group decided to call it a night, after successfully setting up your slides and actually discussing what the project entailed. You were doing just fine until one of your group members, Alex, decided to mention something that took you completely by surprise.

“Of course I’m going to the party tonight. Han Jisung’s going to be there, and you know how fun he can be at parties. Plus, he has the best weed on campus, and I need to refill my stash,” Alex commented, to which your other group member he was talking to smacked his arm loudly.

You froze at the mention of that name. You hadn’t really heard it in a few weeks, since you didn’t talk to many people and honestly tried to forget everything associated with it. You awkwardly look at your surroundings, trying to change the subject completely.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry,” Alex apologized, proceeding to use your name in order to convey how deeply sorry he was.

You played it off by smiling and shaking your head. “It’s fine, Alex. It’s been a bit since we’ve broken up, so you’re all good.”

That’s right. Han Jisung was your ex boyfriend, and the mention of his name always made your skin crawl. You were trying to erase every memory you had of him. He wasn’t a terrible boyfriend, no, but certainly not the best. You couldn’t help but briefly think back to all of the fights you had leading up towards the end of your breakup, how angry and sad you were with him. You also couldn’t help but think about the good times you shared, cuddling and kissing and everything else that came with that. A flurry of emotions and memories swarmed your brain all at once, and you just had to get out of that damn library as quickly as possible.

“All right,” you clapped your hands together. “It was great working with you all tonight, I appreciate all of your hard work. I will get started on my part sometime this weekend, not sure when. I’ll see you guys on Monday. Have a good night, everyone.”

Everyone said goodbye to you as you darted for the exit. You stopped in your tracks, however, when you heard Chae-Won call your name. “Wait up!” She cried. “Hey, I’m sorry for what Alex said, he’s a complete idiot. He honestly wasn’t thinking.”

“No, it’s cool. Not a lot of people knew Jisung and I were together, so it’s not a big deal,” you reassured her, a small pang of sadness hitting your chest.

“I know, but it still hurts. Breakups are the worst, especially when the guy is a dumbass,” Chae-Won said, and you couldn’t help but chuckle loudly at her comment. “But seriously, men are idiots, and I’m sorry about your breakup. If you want, we should hangout sometime. I know some cool clubs downtown that play good music and have the best vibes. Or we can just stay in and watch movies, it doesn’t matter to me.”

A huge smile grew on your face. No one has spoken so kindly to you in a while, so to hear that made your heart feel warm. You placed a hand on Chae-Won’s shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. “Thank you, Chae-Won. I really appreciate it. I’ll definitely take you up on that offer, but I honestly just want to hang out by myself tonight. It’s been a long week.”

“Of course. I was the same last week, and I’ll probably end up falling asleep at ten tonight because of how exhausted I am,” she joked, in which you laughed with her. “But I mean it, just text me anytime and we can work something out.”

“Absolutely, I will for sure. Have a good night,” you told your friend as you made your way to the door.

A bittersweet feeling sat with you as you walked out of the library. On one hand, you started thinking about your ex-boyfriend when you really didn’t want to. But at the same time, you had made a new friend, a friend who seemed really eager to spend time with you. The feeling stayed with you as you walked back to your apartment on-campus, stopping by the grocery store to pick up some dinner and your favorite snacks before heading in for the night. You were excited to have a self-care night, focused solely on yourself and resting after a long week of classes and exams. 

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Your night was going completely fine until you decided to redownload Instagram. You had come to realize that despite taking a long shower, doing your nails, and watching a movie, you were still bored out of your mind. Maybe it was because of how early in the night it was, or because you couldn’t stop thinking of Jisung and what he was doing right now. A mixture of both, probably. 

Quickly signing into your account, you became nervous as the screen started to load, getting ready to show you account. Immediately upon looking at your feed, your stomach instantly dropped. Not only was there a new post from Jisung, sporting a new haircut and outfit, but there was also a post on his story. You nervously clicked his icon, revealing a group photo of him and his friends at a party from a few months back, claiming he “wanted to show some love to his brothers.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the picture, as you were the one to take that photo, and you weren’t particularly fond of what happened that night. Jisung insisted you come to this party, since you had been locking yourself in your apartment every night for the past two weeks. You kept telling him no, but he only had to say a few words about how pretty you were and how much he missed you for you to change your mind. Looking back, you hate how much of a pushover you were, wishing you had a backbone to tell him no, especially for a guy who didn’t give a damn about you.

The entire night, you clung to Jisung while he completely ignored you, smoking blunts while trying different alcohol drinks and focusing on his friends. They were chatting about something completely stupid, most likely the new video game they all started playing or how many girls they had fucked in the past few weeks. It left you bored and irritated out of your mind, and when Jisung asked you to take a picture of him and his friends, you took the photo and stormed off.

It was a faint memory now, as they all started to blend together because of how similar they were. Jisung would tell you how much he missed you and how pretty you were, you’d hang out, and he’d ignore you if he was with his friends or at a party. The same routine, God knows why you stayed with him all that time when he treated you like shit.

But you were reminded of the good times when you “accidentally” clicked on Jisung’s profile to see what he had been posting. You saw photos of him hanging out at different places in the city, some of which were taken by you. You also recalled taking numerous photos together, some selfies of him kissing you or your cheek, others of you two just being a happy couple. Those days were the best, as it was just you two doing whatever you wanted and having so much fun. 

That was one of the reasons why you stayed for so long, because of how sweet and caring Jisung could be. You held onto the hope that he would start treating you like that whenever you were with his friends or in more public spaces, but that never happened, no matter how hard you kept trying. 

You couldn’t help but feel a small tear roll down your cheek once you saw some photos of Jisung hanging out with some girls, letting them cling onto him at parties and really starting to notice how much he had changed since you two broke up. His hair was longer, his wardrobe had taken a turn (for the worse, if you were being completely honest), and he just appeared to be having more fun. Especially with the girls on his profile, as you noticed there had been other photos of them together at different parties. You wondered what he did at them, or if he got anxious when he left (since he always told you he was afraid of leaving places at night).

You shut off your phone and you couldn’t help but start crying. You hated how upset you were over this, how you bottled up your emotions and pretended that you were fine, but in reality you were just sad. Sad that you had to break up with the boy you really liked, one that you wanted to have a serious relationship with. You wanted it so badly, and for Jisung to fight for you just as much as you fought for him. But he didn’t, he honestly didn’t care about you that much. Not enough to make him stay.

What got to you the most was the fact that Jisung was posting photos of him hanging out with girls, when he never even posted one photo of you two together. Were you really that awful of a girlfriend? Sure, you had your fair share of flaws, as you were human and humans were not meant to be perfect, but you didn’t think you were that terrible. You were loyal to Jisung, never once did you come off as too clingy or annoying, and you respected his boundaries, never questioning who he was hanging out with in an accusing manner. So why did he treat you the way he treated you when you were together?

You couldn’t help but wonder… had Jisung been seeing other girls when you were together? No, he was not the best boyfriend in the world, that’s for damn sure. But he would never cheat, he constantly reassured you that he wasn’t seeing anyone else and that you were “the only one for him” (which was a total lie, but it was reassuring nonetheless). That was the only thing you believed and remained true throughout the course of your relationship. 

When you two started having sex, you wanted to make sure he was clean and did not have any STDs. You both got tested (per your request) and it was something you took very seriously. Jisung constantly reassured you that he did not have an STD and wasn’t seeing anyone else. And he was right; from the numerous times you had sex or done other sexual activities, you never once got an infection.

Sex with Jisung was one of the things you missed the most about your relationship. Not only because he was clean, but because of how good he made you feel. Always letting you come first, pleasuring you in the right places and not stopping until you were satisfied. There was a day where your roommate went home for the weekend and Jisung stayed over, to which you two had sex basically the entire night, trying out different positions and entangling yourself in each other's arms. You even had sex in the shower, which was a whole other playing field you desperately wanted to try again. And you did, on multiple occasions. 

You missed the way he made you feel, how he made your body feel. And now that he was most likely doing the same stuff you two did with other girls, you couldn’t help but feel a piece of your heart shatter. You hadn’t really processed the breakup until now, throwing yourself into schoolwork and pretending like everything was fine. Now that you were seeing things for how they actually were, you couldn’t help but start crying.

You could feel the tears falling down your cheeks slowly, coming out rapidly and for no way for you to stop them. You deleted Instagram as quickly as possible as you realized you could no longer stay on that godforsaken app without getting upset. You continued to let yourself cry it out, the bottled up emotions finally exploding and flooding from your mind. You laid in bed and just let yourself cry; it was the best thing you could do for yourself at that point.

Once you realized that crying wasn’t going to make you stop being sad, you decided to call your mother. You two were very close and always had been since childhood. You were just so busy with school and her with her job that it was hard for you guys to talk all the time. Normally you try to call each other once or twice a week, more if you both had the time. This week you hadn’t spoken much, just because of your schedules. You figured she would from work, as it was the evening and she always got out early on Fridays. Sniffling, you opened your phone and dialed her number, waiting anxiously for her to pick up.

It took a few rings before you heard your mother on the other line. “Hello?” She spoke in a normal tone.

“H-Hi Mom,” you cry quietly, trying not to break down right in front of her. “Do you have a minute to talk?”

“Oh of course, what’s going on?” She asked, immediately knowing something was wrong. Mother’s instinct, you guessed. “Why are you crying? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I’m not in danger or anything, but . . . do you remember Jisung? My ex boyfriend?” You ask, making yourself comfortable on your bed and hugging one of your Squishmallows.

“Ugh, yeah. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I don’t like him,” your mother answered, disgusted. You couldn’t help but laugh at her behavior, as you felt the exact same way about him. “Why? Has he done something to upset you?”

“No. Matter of fact, we haven’t spoken since I broke up with him. No I just, I was doing this group project for one of my classes and this guy Alex mentioned how Jisung was going to have this epic party tonight and . . . I don’t know. I logged onto Instagram just to see what he’s been up to and . . . he’s completely changed. He grew his hair long, and it looks like he’s trying out different lives with all the ‘cool’ photos he’s been posting at different places in the city. He even posted photos with some girls, and I guess it just hit me that we’re not together anymore. I’ve been holding it for weeks now and all the emotions are hitting me at once. So yeah, I’m just really sad. I’m sorry to bother you, I know it’s late and you’ve had a long day at work.”

“Do not apologize,” your mother reassured you. “You are completely fine. I’m your mom, I’m always here for you. Let me be the first to say that I think Jisung is a loser, okay? I never liked him, not since you told me about how terribly he treated you at that party and other times after that. In all seriousness, social media only shows one side of the story. I know you’ve heard this a million times, but it’s true. People only post the best parts of their lives to make it seem like they’re cool and interesting, when they really aren’t. Jisung is doing the exact same thing.”

“No, I know what you mean, and I agree with you. It just sucks because he’s posting photos I took of him and he wouldn’t even post a photo of us together, but has the audacity to post photos with two girls? It just makes me so upset. I know I was the one to dump him, but I did it because of how he treated me like garbage. He’d ignore me whenever we would hang out with his friends, get mad at me for being mad at him for being an asshole, and just gaslight me into thinking that he wasn’t treating me terribly, he was just ‘busy’ with school. I don’t know, it’s hitting me all at once and I don’t know what to do,” you vented, wiping the many tears that fell from your eyes with the sleeve of your shirt.

Silence filled between you as you cried, your mother soothing you over the phone by letting you cry. “Let it out, it’s okay. Just get everything off of your chest, I’m right here. You’re dealing with a lot, so just let it out.”

You continued to cry until what felt like forever, and you finally managed to take a deep breath and restart the conversation. “It hurts, and I don’t know why. I guess I still miss him, he’s changed and he didn’t have to. I miss how it used to be. I . . . I wish we could get back together. Start fresh, you know?”

“Of course. I get what you mean, I was the same with this boyfriend I had in high school. I wanted him back, he was a piece of shit, and eventually I got over it. Thank God, cause Ricky turned out to be a complete asshole. He’s also gotten really ugly,” your mother shared, to which you giggled at how she spoke about her ex. “I say all this to remind you that it’s normal to want him back. But Honey, it’s for the best. Jisung was not a good boyfriend to you. Every time you gave him attention and showed interest in him, he’d always blow you off or get annoyed. He wanted you less than you wanted him, you have to remember that.”

You nodded your head, realizing what your mother said was true. “You’re right, he did get uninterested and bored whenever I gave him attention and affection. And then he’d get mad and tell me that he missed me so much whenever I didn’t talk to him for a few days. Ugh, people like that are the absolute worst. You either want me or you don’t, you can’t have both.”

“Yes! Exactly!” Your mother agreed with you enthusiastically. “That’s how Jisung was with you. I mean, he basically faded away weeks before you broke up with him. I know you miss him, but it’s the idea of him that you miss and want back. Not actually him. This breakup is for the best, you’ll find someone who will treat you right and make you forget that Jisung even exists. I know it doesn’t help much, but trust me, it is true. And it will happen.”

“It does help. I’m so young, I have so much to look forward to and crying over a stupid boy is so pointless. Well, not pointless, but you know what I mean. I think I’m okay now, I’m just going to remind myself whenever I get sad that it’s for the best and it’s okay to feel the way I’m feeling. I just need to remember that Jisung is an asshole and I deserve better,” you told your mother, but mainly to yourself since you’re coaching yourself through your emotions. “Thank you for listening to me, Mommy. I appreciate it so much.”

“I’m your mom, Honey. I’m always here for you, no matter what. I’m glad you’re feeling better and that you’re actually processing your emotions. It’s not good to bottle them up, you know,” your mother reassured you. “Take it easy for the rest of the night, okay? Watch a movie, have some ice cream, read a book. I don’t know, whatever is going to help you relax. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

“For sure, I’m just so grateful for you and everything that you do for me. Thank you,” you thanked her. “I think I’m going to put on a movie and eat some ice cream. Should I watch When Harry Met Sally or 10 Things I Hate About You?”

“Ooh, they’re both so good. Um, I’d have to say When Harry Met Sally. Classic, can never go wrong with it,” your mother answered. “I gotta run, your father wants to watch a show before we go to bed. Call me if you need anything or if you still want to talk, okay?”

“Okay Mom, I will. Tell Dad I say hi and that I miss him! I love you, talk to you soon,” you answered.

“I will. I love you more, goodnight,” she spoke.

“Goodnight,” and with that, you both hung up the phone.

You took a deep breath before sighing. It felt good to get that off your chest, as it had been weighing on you for so long. You felt a bit better, a sense of clarity washing over you as you got organized for the movie you were about to watch. Of course, you were still upset about Jisung and a small part of you still wanted him back, but that was a natural part of a breakup. Of course you wanted him back, it had only been a few weeks since you broke up, so it was normal for you to miss him and want to get back together. You knew you would get over this eventually, you just needed time to let out your emotions and process them. 

You’d be the person you were before you dated Jisung and you started to look forward to finding yourself again. A small smile arose on your face as you turned on the television and got your movie ready, excited for a nice, relaxing weekend.

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The weekend was a relaxing time for you, a peaceful weekend you really needed. You finished that movie you told your mom you were going to watch (and it was amazing, as always) and then you decided to go to bed for the night. It wasn’t hard for you to sleep with all of your Squishmallows and stuffed animals surrounding you. You had a great night's sleep, to put it simply, and it prepared you for the nice weekend ahead.

You only had a little homework left to complete, just the slides for your project and a quick quiz to take (to which you got a one hundred percent, per usual). You did that fairly early in the day so you could have the rest of the day to do whatever you wanted. Rather than wallowing in your apartment all day, you decided to explore the city and go to different places you hadn’t been before. You had put on a cute outfit, one that made you feel confident and fashionable. You wanted that boost after how low you were feeling last night, and you hadn’t worn something cute in a while, so you figured this would be the perfect time to do so.

You traveled to different vintage shops and bookstores, looking for little trinkets to put in your room. Eventually you found some cool little plates and small, aesthetic photos to put on your wall and bookshelf. You even found a vintage vinyl record and a new book to read, so all in all, it was a successful day. You went to a new cafe you had been wanting to try for a while now, but hadn’t had the time because of school and . . . well, doing whatever Jisung wanted to do. 

You tried to block him out of your thoughts, especially since you wanted to heal from the breakup and move on with your life. And you were successful, for the most part. It was the little things that made you think of Jisung, such as wanting to tell him all about the new book you found or wanting to take him to the coffee shop and antique store you went to. But you quickly reminded yourself that the breakup was for the best, and that whenever you gave Jisung so much attention, he’d want you less and less. That helped you stop and reset your mind, and it worked for the majority of the day.

After your adventure, you decided to head home, get some good food from the campus dining hall, and watch another movie. You loved watching movies and rating them on your Letterboxd account, it was a hobby you found pleasurable. Being able to rate movies and see what others thought about it, especially the ones that left funny reviews. You tried to leave funny ones that you saw on Twitter and TikTok, but they were not nearly as great or creative as what other people wrote. Still, it was a fun thing to do.

You quickly placed your bags on your bookshelf and made your way to the dining hall. Though you lived on-campus, it was still a far walk because you lived on one side and the dining hall was on another, so you wanted to make sure you got there on time. And you certainly didn’t mind it on this gorgeous afternoon. It didn’t take you as long as you thought and you had plenty of time, but you wanted to make sure you weren’t being rude by showing up ten minutes before the dining hall closed. You just wanted to be courteous to the staff who worked long hours in the cafeteria.  

You noticed you had gotten a text from your mother, to which you pulled out your phone and tried to read what it said. However, you collided with someone, in which both of you stumbled backwards with a gasp. Luckily, neither of you had a drink in your hands, so no one’s clothes got stained with various liquids. That was always a plus. Nothing else fell, either, which was an honest relief. You could not afford to get your phone screen fixed nor could you buy a new one, so it was just a matter of running into someone while you weren’t looking.

“Sorry about that, I . . .” the voice trailed off, in which it belonged to Hwang Hyunjin, a friend of Jisung's who just so happened to be heading to the dining hall at the same time you were. He proceeded to say your name in a confused manner, surprised to see you out and about.

“Hyunjin? Hey, how are you? It’s been a while,” you asked with an enthusiastic smile. You always liked Hyunjin, as he was very nice and made you feel welcome within him and Jisung’s friend group. More than Jisung, if you were being honest. 

“I’ve been good, yeah just busy with school and studying. I’ve been trying to paint more when I have the time and it’s coming along really nicely,” he explained, which made you happy to hear. Even if you and Jisung were no longer together, you had a soft spot for his friends and wished them nothing but the best. “H-How have you been? None of us have heard from you in, like, weeks.”

A puzzled look arose on your face as you processed the question. Did Jisung not say anything? Why didn’t he tell his best friends that he and his girlfriend broke up? After all, all of you spend a good amount of weekends together, going out to dinner or hanging out at parties. Why wouldn't Jisung come clean? Unless he didn’t care to tell them and just assumed they would figure it out on their own, which hurt more than you thought it did, but maybe it was for the best. Let the boys think you turned into a mystery, it made you feel cool and interesting.

You took a deep breath before breaking the news to Hyunjin, wanting to prepare for the awkwardness that would come afterwards. “Uh, yeah. I got really busy with school and stuff, but um . . . Jisung and I aren’t together anymore. We broke up. That’s the main reason for why you all don’t see me around anymore.”

There was a pause, the Hwang boy taking in everything you told him. He looked shocked, to say the least, as he figured you were just busy with school and didn’t have the time to party. But he thought wrong and did not expect for you and Jisung to break up. He couldn’t help but let out a sigh. “Shit. I-I didn’t know,” he continued by mentioning your name in a serious and caring manner. “I’m sorry, that’s awful. Can I ask why? if it’s too much, you don't have to share—”

“No it’s okay, Hyunjin. Really, it’s fine. We just don’t have anything in common and I wanted to focus on school and finding an internship,” you admit. You couldn’t pretend it was for platonic reasons, as your relationship just ended and you could not fathom being Jisung’s friend right now. “So yeah, I ended things a few weeks ago. I’m doing okay, I just spent the day in the city and went to some really cool stores. You’d really like the antique shop I went to, they have a lot of paintings you would think are cool.”

Hyunjin nodded his head sympathetically. “That’s cool, I’ll definitely check it out when I have the time. I’m just busy between school and extracurriculars, it’s chaotic,” he commented. “But I’m sorry to hear that, you guys were cute together. Do you think you guys could ever be friends? We miss having you around and would love to keep hanging out with you.”

“If I’m being honest, I don’t think so. There’s just too much that happened and I’m not even sure if Jisung and I could even be friends given our history. And in general, too, since we’re complete opposites,” you sadly explained. It was true: you and Jisung were too different and you could not be his friend. If you couldn’t get along romantically, then how the hell were you two supposed to get along as friends? You’d rather play it safe and just not be friends with him. You wanted to be as far away as you could be from the Han boy, especially since you wanted to heal and prioritize yourself from now on.

You could tell Hyunjin was upset, since he liked hanging out with you and everyone else. It hurt your heart, but it was for the best. Who knows, maybe you could put this behind you one day and be friends with them again, Jisung included. But right now, it just hurt too much, and it would be better for your mental health if you kept your distance from Jisung and his friends. 

“I understand, you gotta put yourself first and do what’s best for you. I respect that,” Hyunjin explained. “But we’re always here for you if you change your mind. We can deal with Jisung, we can even kick him out of the house for the night and make him hang out with his other friends while you hang out with us. Only if you want though, it’s just an option in case you ever wanted to.”

You laughed at his idea. “Thank you, Hyunjin. I really appreciate it. You’re so kind, so sweet. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”

“Of course. I always got your back,” he reassured you, adding your name to the end of his sentence to make sure you knew he meant what he said. “I have to run to the library before they close to print something. I’ll see you around?”

You nodded your head and started to make your way toward the dining hall. “Yeah, I’ll see you around. Bye, Hyunjin.”

He called out your name while he waved goodbye, and with that, you parted ways. You wanted to cry, the moment you shared was so sweet and it made you sad that you could no longer be friends with Hyunjin and the rest of Jisung’s friends. They were such a great group of guys, even when they were annoying, they always managed to make you laugh and include you in everything when you were all together. It was for the best, but you knew you were going to miss having a big group of friends who really cared about you.

It was almost as if a lightbulb had turned on in your head. You were sad about not being able to have friends, but you realized that your only friends were your boyfriend’s friends (you are an antisocial person who has had trouble making friends at your school). Meaning, you were sad about not having friends, but it was up to you now to go out of your comfort zone and start trying to make friends. Sure, people were probably settled in their friend groups by now, but you truly did not give a fuck. Surely there had to be people out there who were looking for friends too or simply did not stick to one friend group. You just had to put yourself out there and just find the right people.

It was going to be hard for sure, as you don’t make best friends five minutes into meeting them, but you were looking forward to the journey and who you would meet along the way. You decided to eat your dinner before making any action steps towards your plan because you were starving and had to get food before the dining hall closed. Once that was taken care of, you walked back to your apartment as quickly as possible.

You sat on your couch and decided to give Chae-Won a call. She had given you her number before you left the library on Friday, saying how you could reach out to her if you ever wanted to hang out. So, in honor of starting your journey to finding friends, you decided to act on it and dialed her number. It took a few rings before she answered, and you were nervous to talk to her, but ready nonetheless. “Hello? Who is this?”

“Hey, Chae-Won!” You greeted her and let her know your name. She excitedly said hello and was happy that you called. “Yeah, I am too! I was just wondering . . . are you going anything tonight?”

And from there on out, your world was about to shift on its axis for the better.

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Six months had passed since everything that happened, and you were in a much better place than before. A lot had happened in a short amount of time — some great things, the others mundane. It didn’t matter, because you were thriving. 

The phone call you shared with Chae-Won was what started it all, really. You had asked her if she wanted to hang out that night, and she was very happy that you asked her that. You ended up staying at her apartment for the night and had a blast, watching movies and drinking good drinks. You talked about what you both liked to do for fun and what other classes you were taking, and it turned out you two liked similar things. You loved watching movies and rating them on Letterboxd, you loved music, and you loved exploring the city. You both could tell from that night a special friendship had begun to blossom.

You continued to make friends through your classes while also prioritizing yourself and your mental health. You only did things you wanted to, knew when your social battery was draining and went home to recharge, and you started to journal to reflect on your life and try to better understand who you were. These methods have helped you greatly and continue to do so to this day. You have learned a lot about yourself and have grown in so many ways. You were proud of how far you had come, to say the least. 

In addition to Chae-Won becoming a very close friend of hers, you also met some friends outside of your major and in extracurriculars. It was a bit hard at first, as Chae-Won was your only friend and it was challenging to meet people when they already had their established friend groups. You were lonely, but making an active effort into meeting people. Eventually, your hard work paid off and you started meeting people like yourself. They had friends, but not a tight-knit friend group who did everything together. Turns out, the friends you were meeting were also friends with Chae-Won, and a little group formed between you four. 

You started doing small things, like going over to each other’s apartments to hang out and watch movies. As you started to become closer, you started to visit the cool clubs Chae-Won mentioned during your meeting for that group project (to which your group got an A, courtesy of you two working your asses off you make sure it was good) and other spots recommended from strangers you met on your outings. You always had a good time together, and even aside from them, you liked the girls and boys you befriended even outside of the friend group that you would occasionally do things with. 

Who knew that by actually leaving your bedroom and putting yourself out there would cause you to meet people and make friends! (Those were the exact words your mother used when you called her to tell her the news about meeting new friends and taking better care of yourself. You still laughed about that, even now, but your mother was absolutely right. When was she ever wrong)?

On top of learning about yourself and meeting new friends, you also acquired a summer internship in the city. You did some advertising work for a computer company, making sure their ads were effective and how to best get people to buy their products through the use of visuals. This was the reason why you were a marketing major and a psychology minor: to do work like this. It was the best of both worlds and you got to do something you loved, which was something you were very serious about. If you didn’t love the work that you did, then you would’ve been miserable and you simply could not have that.

Your new friends didn’t live too far from the city, so they came and visited you whenever they could on the weekends and you did whatever you wanted, since it was summer and there were no classes. The summer was perfect overall: you had a great job, you met amazing friends, and you were in a better place than you were in the winter. It was interesting to see how things became full circle, you honestly thought you would never see the day.

But even with this healing journey and getting to a better place, you couldn’t help but think about Jisung every so often. You didn’t miss him, no . . . did you? You couldn’t tell. You missed hanging out and being in a relationship with him, and he wasn’t the worst boyfriend on the planet, so it wasn’t like you were running back to a completely terrible situation. But then you remembered all the bad stuff that happened within it, and then you were torn. You were in a much better place mentally from when you first got together and broke up, so the idea of trying it again didn’t seem so terrible. You would only reconsider it if you were to run into him on campus and have an actual conversation. Perhaps that would give you the clarity you had been looking for. 

And that day surely came when you least expected it. It was around the third week of classes, and you were heading to one of your advertising classes when you heard someone call out your name. You looked up in confusion, as no one has ever yelled out your name like that before. Curiously, you tried to search for whoever said your name, which didn’t take you long because once you saw the figure of Han Jisung, with his long hair and interesting choice of clothes, you immediately knew it was him. 

Your legs and body froze as you watched him walk towards you. You did not know what to do — part of you wanted to blow him off and say you were running late to class, but the other side of you wanted to talk to him, to see how things were. You had no idea which choice was the right decision. You were scared you were going to immediately forgive him and forget everything that happened between you two, and you didn’t want that. At least, you didn’t think you did.

Your mind became filled with a tornado of thoughts once Jisung approached you. He had that signature smile he always gave you whenever he greeted you. Butterflies erupted in your stomach simultaneously, and it was almost as if you had forgotten how to speak.

“Hey, Sunshine,” he greeted. “It’s been a while, how are you? How was your summer?”

You stared at him for a brief moment before collecting yourself. You can do this, you said to yourself. Just talk to him how you would talk to your friends. “Jisung, hey! I’m . . . I’m doing well. Yeah, I stayed in the city to do an internship and it was great. H-How about you?”

“Oh it was great, I did some work for this tech company, mainly coding and shit. It wasn’t bad, but I’d much rather be listening to music and chilling, you know,” he explained nonchalantly. 

“Ah, yes. You always said music and relaxing were way more fun than studying and classes,” you commented, in which he laughed. You recalled many times when you would hang out with him on the quad after your classes while he skipped his and listened to some songs that you thought were just God-awful. You didn’t even know what genre they would be considered, that’s how bad it was.

“And I still believe it’s true. That and doing it with someone you like or are close with, those three things are what make it perfect,” Jisung laughed again. “Do anything fun over the summer?”

“Yeah, I hung out with some of my friends who live close to the city. They’re all in different majors, but they’re really nice. Other than that, I just went to visit home a few times,” you answered.

“That’s nice. How’s your mom doing?” He asked.

She thinks you’re a loser, you thought to yourself while you tried to hide your smile. You couldn’t help but think back to what she said all those months ago, and how she probably felt the same way today. You shook your head, “she’s doing great, I’ll tell her you say hi,” you reassured. “How was your summer?”

“Oh it was fine. Boring, but fun. Went to a few parties, smoked a lot and just had a good time with my friends from home. I missed the guys though, we only saw each other once. I’m glad we’re together again,” Jisung explained and you just nodded your head. 

You were happy his summer wasn’t terrible. Certainly you wouldn’t have wanted to have been together; him dragging you to parties and completely ignoring you while hanging out with his friends was the definition of hell for you. You were glad that he had his fun and you had yours.

There was an awkward silence between you, like there was something that wanted to be said but neither of you could say anything. You briefly glanced at your phone and saw that class was starting in ten minutes, and it was then that you decided to break the silence and speak. “I gotta get to class in ten minutes, it was nice running—”

“I miss you,” Jisung blurted out, which made your stomach drop. You could feel your chest tighten as you anticipated his next words. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot and I . . . I just miss you and being with you. I know we haven’t talked in, like, months, but I miss you. Do you want to get coffee this week and talk about this more?”

And there it was. This was what you were waiting for, now and when you two first broke up. You had hoped it wouldn’t, but it was inevitable at this point. You eventually had to talk about it. And you just stood there, staring at him and admiring his beauty. His hair was still long, hidden in a black beanie with a pair of headphones resting on his neck. Han Jisung was an attractive person, there was no denying that. 

He sounded genuine, with his words. He wanted to talk about your relationship and how to move forward, to get back together. He wanted to be with you. Your old self wouldn’t even give it a second thought and immediately say yes. She would have wanted this for you. But now, you weren’t sure.

You thought about the nights you spent crying over how he treated you at a party, or when he wouldn’t text you back but would post back-to-back on his Instagram and Snapchat stories. You thought about how every time you put so much energy into him and your relationship, he would give less back and would get annoyed. When you gave less, he claimed he missed you and wanted you to spend time with him. You never knew which Jisung you were going to get: the kind Jisung, who was the one who made you want to be his girlfriend in the first place. Or the asshole Jisung, who ignored you and got annoyed at you for simple actions. 

The whole relationship drained you. A constant battle of he’s such a great boyfriend, I love him or he’s the worst person ever and I can’t believe he’s treating me this way. Jisung seemed like he wanted things to be different this time around, with his serious face and tone of voice. But how do you know if it was sincere? Was he just saying it to get back together and then would repeat the same actions later on?

And when you thought about your relationship more, you realized there were some things you could stop pretending to like. Jisung’s music taste, for example. You always told him it was cool and unique, but you honestly hated it. Now that you weren’t together, you didn’t have to pretend to like his shitty music. And you also didn’t have to pretend that you liked going to parties with him, while he ignored you the entire night and focused on his friends doing the stupidest things ever. You realized you didn’t have to pretend to like things for the sake of making other people happy. 

And man, was that feeling life changing.

You couldn’t help but think about the good parts of your relationship, too. Your hangouts in the city, in your bedroom’s, watching movies and having sex whenever you could. They were all great memories most definitely, but memories that were not worth getting back together for the sake of being together.

The healing journey you went on (and were still currently on) made you into a better person. You turned into a shrouded mystery, completely reinventing yourself and changing your outlook on everything. You became unrecognizable, similar to how you were before you met Jisung. Turning into a shrouded mystery and going through that painful start of your journey was the only way back to your dignity. And that was simply something you could not afford to lose again, you couldn't risk losing all of that hard work you did.

You took a deep breath in before giving Jisung your answer. “Jisung, I . . . I can’t. We . . . the way you treated me was just awful. I really let you walk all over me and I am not going to do that again. I know you’ve probably changed and won’t do it again, but I just can’t. The breakup sucked and it took me a long time to get to where I am now, and I can’t destroy the progress I’ve made. I’m sorry, but I don’t think it’s a good idea if we get back together.”

You watched Jisung’s face fall as you explained your answer. You hated hurting people, but you had to do it for yourself. “I completely understand. I’m really sorry for how I treated you, I am. I feel terrible for the way I acted and how I made you go out when you didn’t want to. I don’t know what I was thinking, but you deserve a lot better than me. And I will forever be upset over how I treated you and let an awesome girl go.”

His apology warmed your heart a bit; it was good to have an actual apology for how awful you had been treated, it healed a small part of your heart. “Thank you, Jisung,” you thanked him quietly. “I’ll always be thankful for you and our relationship. You taught me a lot and it honestly helped me go out of my comfort zone. If it weren’t for you or our break up, I wouldn’t have changed and be the person I am today. So thank you for that, truly.”

A sad laugh escaped his lips. “Glad I was actually able to give you something great,” he spoke quietly, in which his words made you smile slightly. “Do you think we could be friends?”

You hesitated to answer at first, but you eventually found the right words to say. “Um, not right now, no. I think I just need to focus on myself and figure out what the hell I’m doing with life and everything. Being friends could turn into something else that I do not have time to worry about nor do I want to worry about. Plus, I am just really busy with school and homework, so I wouldn’t be able to hang out much,” you explained. “It’s not entirely out of the picture, though. Once I’m in a better place with myself, I don’t see why not. You’re a kind and funny person, Han Jisung. I want those kinds of people as my friends.”

Jisung nodded his head. “Yeah, I understand. Take as long as you need. It doesn’t matter if you decide by seventy-five that you are ready to be friends, I will gladly welcome you with open arms. That is, if I’m not in a nursing home by then. We’ll figure it out once we live next door to each other and have to figure out how to convince the nurses to give us better cafeteria food.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his comment. Aside from your relationship drama, Jisung was a good guy who knew how to make people laugh and was very sincere. You were glad you were able to talk to him like this, even if it was for the last time, and leave things on a positive note. You looked down at your watch and saw that you only had five minutes until you had to get to class. “Listen, I really have to make it to this class, this professor is very strict on locking the doors right when the class starts. I’m happy we were able to talk, Jisung. I am glad you are doing well and thank you for . . . this. I don’t know how to describe it.”

“No worries, I get what you mean. I’m happy that you’re doing well, too,” he said. “I’ll see you around, Sunshine.”

And with that, Jisung turned around and made his way to another building on campus. You made your way into your classroom building and wandered the halls until you entered class and took your seat. Sitting down forced you to reflect on your conversation with Jisung, and how you were able to get the closure you needed.

You had been waffling earlier if you two should get back together now that you were in a good place. You could set necessary boundaries now that you were a more confident person. However, you decided against it and told Jisung that you did not want to get back together with him. From what he told you and your own realizations, you realized you would be better off staying single and focusing on yourself and your studies for a little while. 

And with that came a happy feeling within your mind and body. You made the right decision, a decision that was going to best benefit you in the long run. A sense of peace had washed over you, and you couldn’t help but smile as you opened your textbook and began to take notes on your lecture, knowing that everything was going to be okay no matter what happened to you in the years to come. 

[chans5oive]

Spiderman au! Jisung x reader

Genre: fluff spiderman jisung x spiderman reader - female reader implied but mostly g/n , ft jihyo of twice

warnings: mentions of violence and pain, teeny-tiny bit of angst, fluff, swearing

Summary: you and jisung went to the same stayville high him excelling in science whilst you excel music however never meeting. Until, your chem teacher pair you up for a project. Your friendship closens and after a while secrets get revealed as a possible relationship arises….

A/n: little thought i had and the way my language switches between english and american???😭😭i know nothing about science past ks4 so bare with my random science-y words. Credit to @/skrfrll on tiktok for the han image 🫶

word count: 1,739

᯽ = your pov

ꕥ = jisung pov

both = both pov

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᯽your pov BRING…you slap your alarm which read 8:39 “SHIT” you shot up and hoiked on clothes and ran into the kitchen you hurriedly grabbed some toast and ran back into your bedroom carrying a red backpack.

“bye mom!!” You called as you ran out of your apartment building into the nearest ally way.

“if i want to get to school on time i better swing there!” You thought and changed into your costume and prayed a local gang didn’t decided to rob a bank. You summersaulted into the air and landed gracefully on you feet in a near by ally and changed into your school clothes before sprinting the extra 2 blocks.

You stuff you bag at the bottom of you locker and ran to your first class. Chemistry. You weren’t awful at chemistry as you had to make spidey-solution but you saw it more as baking then chemical mixing which is why you often failed most of science. The class was just starting luckily.

“Y/N where have you been!! You friend Jihyo said. “I saved u a seat.” And gestured to the empty desk next to her.

“sorry!! I tried to swing here but it still took forever” Jihyo was the only person who knew you were spiderman.

“alright class today were doing advanced quadratic formula’s so im going to pair you up…ummm….Jihyo with c/n (classmate’s name)….c/n with c/n and Y/n you with Jisung.” Your Chemistry teacher explained in his monotone voice.

“who?” You thought. However when you saw him walking over to your table you knew immediately. Han jisung one of the most smartest science students in stayville high.

—————————————————————————

ꕥ jisung pov “alright class today were doing advanced quadratic formula’s so im going to pair you up…ummm….Jihyo with c/n (classmate’s name)….c/n with c/n and Y/n you with Jisung.” the Chemistry teacher explained in his monotone voice.

Jisung knew immediately who you were. Y/n was know for your sharp answers and often whats seen as “lazy” attitude towards science or any subject for that matter! However, when you hold an instrument suddenly your transform into a genius! You excelled in music being stayville’s top music student.

“hi!” He spoke trying not to sound to corny

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov

“Hi!” Jisung spoke to me. God he sounded adorably corny.

“hey!” You spoke back and smiled.

“so should we get working on these equations?” He asked pulling up a chair next to me with his pencil case in hand.

You nodded in agreement and read out this first equation.

“Ey = Eosin (kx - wt) what the fuck?!?!!” You murmured to yourself and looked over at Jisung who was scribbling away.

“done! :)” He replied a few moments later.

You looked at him gobsmacked, jaw hanging open. How? That question was impossible you told him and explained how every other question look like a cryptic code to you. He laughed and said he could teach you further if you like after school you agreed and gave him your address and he gave you his. You exchanged numbers and headed to your next lesson. —————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov

Lessons are finally over. Jisung walks back to his apartment when he feel a buzz from my pants. He looks at his phone and see a text from y/n “hey its y/n! Am i free to come round at the weekend?” He replies trying not to sound to desperate or dry telling them its ok to come round this weekend.

ok he needed to clean my room but first. He needed to patrol

no one really knew he was spiderman apart from his best friend Lee minho. He had been spiderman for a while now however there was a new spiderman that had been appearing recently grabbing the media’s attention. He had never had contact with them but was well aware of there presence.

CRASH

an alarming noise arose from a near by street followed by car alarms and burts of flames.

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov CRASH

an alarming noise arose from a near by street followed by car alarms and bursts of flames.

Your spidey-senses tingled and you zwipped away to the source of the commotion.

You once again landed gracefully on the street to asses the problem. There was a bank robber from a local gang but whats the they’re using? All of a sudden a gang member arises out of a black car. All of a sudden he flicks something out of his hand. A long metallic sword appears with glowing purple detailing.

You thwip you wrist if fast as you can. Web after web he would hold. You were struggling to hold back everyone when a black figure swings through the night. They were so majestic- wait fuck! Thats spiderman!!

“need a hand” he said cockily

“thank that would be nice” you said panting out of breath and wounded.

Together fighting side by side you fought all the bad guys taking them down gracefully and skill fully.

—————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov Spiderman (jisung) and the mysterious spider girl (you) finish your fight. Spiderman and you sit on a roof deciding to strike up a conversation.

“so who on earth are you” he spoke

“oh im spider-girl i got bitten about 3 months ago and ive been her ever since” You exclaimed.

You were the most gorgeous superhero or human (he hoped) he had ever seen.

-the weekend-

Jisung was spend the entire morning cleaning his room from top too bottom. After all you were coming round. He made sure to hide all of his spiderman stuff in his closet.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang.

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov

You walked to Jisungs apartment looking at your phone for direction.

You rang the doorbell and was met by Jisungs bright smile. You smiled back and entered following him too his room. You sat on his bed taking in everything. All his posters, photos and abandoned homework. He reached into his desk and pulled out a chemistry book and sat on the floor, gesturing you to follow him. You sat down next to him listening to everything he was saying.

—————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov

Jisung tried to teach you everything he could think and even tried to not make it sound to “sciency” however he found it hard to focus. Especially when you giggled at his joke or when you leaned over him to look at something is his text book. He felt himself getting hotter by the second. He definitely feels a crush arising so before he became totally in love with you he had to become closer to you. —————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov He decided to invite you to his house again. And again. And again. However he couldn’t deal with you just staying over for and hour or two or having late night talk before falling asleep on him which made him fall even more in love with you.

he had to ask you out. Tonight when you come over for the billionth time.

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov

You had a crush on jisung. You adored him. His smile, his laugh, the way he focuses on science and his dorky little quirks. You had to confess. Tonight when you go round to his.

—————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov “hi y/n” he smiled awkwardly. “hey sung :)” you say cheerfully back.

You followed him to his room as normal. Jisung was sweating he was going to confess in less than an hour. Never in his life has he confessed to a girl.

“hey y/n can i ask you something?” He said lowering his tone.

“sure are you ok?” You asked concerned.

“so um i have kinda liked you for a while and i was wondering if you would like to hang out as more than friends?” He said fiddling with his fingers in his lap.

You giggled and looked at him shyly. “Sung, i have liked you for a while now too and i was going to say the same thing to you” you said.

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov Oh my goodness. Jisung likes you back!!!! Han jisung who not to long ago you didn’t even know existed! That didn’t matter right now in this moment you were currently fighting some horrific monster you were currently holding its jaw open with your arms trying not to get eaten. Its green saliva dripping down oozing onto your mask.

You weren’t looking when all of a sudden another monster came and slashed you back you fell limp and dropped to the floor. Just as you were about a become a monsters dinner. Thwip thwip webs came flying at the monsters face. SPIDERMAN!!

—————————————————————————

ꕥjisungs pov

Jisung fought and fought after a lot of fighting he was about to swing away when he noticed your limp body covered in gaping slash wounds. He picked you up and swung you to the nearest rooftop.

Your mask was peeling off and he thought you lips looked familiar. How could he ever forget your lips.

“y/n…oh my gosh” Jisung said his voice trembling fron inside his suit.

he carried your body to his apartment and laid you on the bed and took of your mask fully. His eyes turning wide as his suspicions confirmed you were lying unconscious on his bed. He sat next to you waiting for you to wake up.

—————————————————————————

᯽your pov

You slowly blinked open to see yourself in Jisung’s bedroom. “Oh no…” you thought. Your face felt bare as you realised you didn’t have you mask. “Please don’t say..”

“y/n!! Are you okay oh my gosh” he said panicking and standing up fron his chair.

“Jisung i can explain i promise!” You said sitting up frantically but remembering thats your in pain and groaning.

“hey hey y/n its on take it easy…i kinda have something to show you” he said his tone lowering once again. He walked to his closet and pulled out a suit that was a bit wrecked from the fight.

“jisung your-“

“i know” he said nodding.

—————————————————————————

᯽ꕥ both pov

-a week later-

You and Jisung are sitting on a bridge you mask pulled up but just above your noses. You turned to him and said

“Yk theres always something ive wanted to do”

“what is it?” He said

You whispered in his ear and you jumped of the bridge and stood on the pavement. He hung of the edge of the bridge upside down. Slowly you both leaned in as you kissed. The toby Maguire kiss

the end

a/n: i hyper linked the toby maguire kiss cuz idk if ppl got what i was saying 😞 a bit crappy at the end as i lost motivation a little and couldnt think of what to write 😖 not proofread so feed back is appreciated!

taglist: @mazeinthemiroh@chansburgah@chocotonez@jisungsdaydreamer@anyamaris@serenitysoda200

[bf-skz]

24 to 25 days of SKZMAS | December 25th - Finale

pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

genre: mutual pining

synopsis: It is the day of the long-awaited Christmas party, and everyone has a date to spend the night with. Everyone other than Jisung and his deskmate...

warnings: -

words: 2604

a/n: how we refer to the boys' dates:

Chan: significant other

Minho: partner in crime

Changbin: lover

Hyunjin: better half

Jisung: lovebug

Felix: soulmate

Seungmin: sweetheart

Jeongin: date

25th day of SKZMAS

December 25th

You are not sure what to expect from this Christmas party. You have attended a number of such parties before, of course, but this one feels different somehow. Being on the organizing committee, you are kind of expected to take credit for all the hard work that went into the decoration, catering and planning of the night… which you aren't sure you deserve.

Granted, you've been a little distracted. With the emotional rollercoaster of the past weeks, you wouldn't blame anyone for not having their head in the game, but of course, you do blame yourself. You just can't seem to get over the fact that you were one step away from happily ever after… until it disappeared with a disappointing poof.

“Yo, everything alright?” Jisung asks as he stops by your side. He looks gorgeous, even more so than usual. He is wearing a red shirt with tight, black jeans and his signature chunky boots, and a goofy, Grinch-esque clip-on tie around his neck. He looks effortlessly gorgeous and you would prefer not to look at him… it just makes it all harder.

“Peachy.” you hum, but you undeniably check him out from head to toe before looking away. “Kind of feeling bad for leaving all the work for Felix and his soulmate.” you admit as you glance over to the couple, snacking at the chocolate fountain.

“Oh, that. Yeah.” Jisung says in a mutter. He hasn’t really thought about that. “But they love these things! Look at them, I am sure they would’ve never taken the extra step if it wasn’t for the organizing shenanigans. And for my genius advice, of course.”

“Yeah, what would we do without you?” you ask with a sad sigh. “Do you wanna get some champagne?”

“Duh, let’s get fucked up!” Jisung grins at you and takes your hand in his, tugging you along to the table with the drinks. You run into Chan and his significant other, the latter sipping some wine, the former pouring some hot chocolate for himself.

“Are you the designated driver?” you ask Chan playfully as you reach them, holding Jisung’s hand tighter, not wanting him to let go.

“No, I'm pregnant.” he jokes as he clings his glass with his significant other’s. “Just kidding.” he says and he seems to be much more relaxed and laid-back. He is pretty cool, compared to the ball of stress you see him as in the office.

“You guys have been together forever, I wouldn’t be surprised if you were.” Jisung says with a sweet smile, and he also pours some drinks for the two of you. “No pressure, though. You are young and have your whole life ahead!” he adds, and you bite back a smile. Yeah, definitely an expert on love.

“I promise, you will be the first to know.” his significant other chuckles and they gently touch Chan’s arm. “Can you take this for me? I have to use the bathroom.”

“Sure thing.” he smiles oh so fondly before exchanging a quick peck on the lips and taking their drink.

“Could you guys keep a secret?” Chan asks suddenly when his significant other is out of hearing distance.

“Oh we love secrets!” you gasp, leaning in eagerly.

“I am very good at keeping them.” Jisung nods solemnly. “Wait, are you actually-”

“No, Jisung.” Chan rolls his eyes but he can't bite back his grin. “I’m going to propose to them in Paris.” he announces in a hushed tone before taking out a box from his inside pocket.

“Oh my god, it's beautiful!” you compliment as he opens the box and shows off a shiny ring. He must have been saving up… and he is proposing in Paris? So romantic!

“Oh, mate, congrats! That’s like, the most romantic thing ever.” Jisung says excitedly, and did you imagine it or did he actually glance at you just now?

“Thank you.” he chuckles, looking between the two of you. “I hope they say yes.” he wonders before slipping the ring back in his pocket. “What are your plans for the future?”

“O-our?” Jisung asks, glancing at you. “Well, we plan on getting drunk tonight, spending the holidays at home, and then probably New Year’s- oh, shit, right, I forgot to tell you, I’m throwing a party on New Year’s! Please come?” he asks you with big, puppy eyes. With everything going on, he sorta just expected that you would always be around… no party is perfect without you.

You are quite taken aback, as you always are by Jisung’s sudden outbursts. You try your best to not get hurt at the fact that he forgot to invite you up until now.

“I will think about it.” you respond instead. Maybe you should go on a dating site and forget about your feelings for Jisung, you think. Soon enough, Chan’s significant other returns from the bathroom and they start being cute and lovey-dovey in no time. You long to have what they have…

“Everyone is so in love.” Jisung also notes, looking around to spot Seungmin and his sweetheart gushing over a photo album, Jeongin and his date dancing to the cheesy Christmas song that’s playing, and Minho… well.

“You can’t eat more pudding than me. Do you even know me?” Minho scoffs, watching his partner in crime with a grimace but you can tell they are holding hands under the table.

“Oh yeah? Is that a challenge?” they question him with a cocked brow.

“Good to see that some things never change.” you chuckle at the sight of the two.

“What? You couldn't seriously think that we will be like Chan and his significant other.” the partner in crime chuckles.

“I wouldn’t dare.” Jisung says, a shiver running down his spine. Seeing Minho so whipped… that sounds terrifying.

“What are the two of you up to, now that the Christmas party is done?” Minho asks, watching the two of you intently.

Why does everyone assume there is anything going on? “Getting drunk. Enjoying the party.” you shrug. “What about you two?”

“Vengeance.” your colleague says from Minho’s side before they exchange a devilish grin.

“Oh no. One Minho was terrifying enough, now there is two?!” Changbin sighs from a few chairs away, sipping his eggnog, arm around his lover’s shoulders.

“Ew, don't compare us!” Minho’s partner in crime frowns.

“They really are the same. You were right.” Changbin’s lover chuckles, patting his cheek gently.

“I’m always right, baby.” Changbin says with a handsome grin, leaning in to press a kiss on their lips.

Jisung shakes his head sadly, pointing fingerguns at the two. “Another one.” he says and bites in his bottom lip as the textbook example of a sad fuckboy.

“Don’t do that.” you giggle, pushing him a tiny bit as the alcohol seeps in your brain. “We can at least count on Hyunjin…” you start but when you search for him, you find him looking at his roommate with fond and loving eyes, holding their hand tight and caressing their knuckles with his thumbs. “I'll take that back.” you whine.

“It looks like it's only you two who couldn't find a date for this party.” Seungmin materializes from thin air, making Jisung jump.

“Holy sh- you are so freaking creepy sometimes!” Jisung whines, and realizes only a second later that he took your hand in fear. He lets go quickly, clearing his throat. “Well, unlike you overly romantic folk, we don't need a date, right?” he asks, looking at you. “We have each other. That's better than any date.”

“Jesus.” you mutter under your breath. “You are so… unbelievable sometimes.” you huff, anger fuming through your body due to the pain of rejection. “Excuse me. I have to go to the restroom.” And with that, you are off.

“You are very dense, aren't you?” Seungmin scoffs. Jisung is frozen in his tracks, blinking after you as you disappear in the bathroom.

“What’s going on?” Hyunjin arrives, holding his better half's hand while the other is planted in his suit jacket.

“I- have no idea.” Jisung says as he looks around his friends. “Did I say something wrong?”

“You’ve only been saying the wrong things.” Seungmin explains. “You should take a hint from Jeongin. He got himself a date in a month and you have been pining for how long exactly?”

“Around two years.” Jisung says absently before he blinks up at Seungmin. “Wait- how did you-”

“Jisung, honey, everyone knows.” Minho’s partner in crime says.

“I think you should thank Felix for putting up with your dumbassery for the past month because if I were him, I probably would've locked the two of you in a storage room until you confess.” Minho says nonchalantly.

At that, Jeongin, who has just sat down with his date, turns to them with wide eyes. Jisung stares at him, shaking his head slowly.

“I don't think that would have helped, hyung.” Jeongin chuckles nervously, stuffing his mouth with a Christmas cookie.

“You little-” Jisung mutters before he meets Minho's eyes.

“Go after them, Hannie.” he says softly, and wow, is he dying or something? Why is Minho not calling him an idiot? “Don't be an idiot.”

“Ah, yeah, okay.” Jisung says, taking a deep breath and starting towards the door which leads to the bathrooms.

“Do you guys think he will be okay?” Changbin’s lover asks.

“He is a smart boy, despite everything you've just witnessed.” Changbin says with a smile, pressing a kiss on their cheek. “They've been like this forever… it's high time one of them made a move.”

Jisung runs into you as you are about to return, having forgotten your phone on the booze table. Just your luck… and now, you are staring at the face you've been trying your hardest to ignore, or at least find it in yourself to not care about.

“Oh- I was just… about to go looking for you.” Jisung says and you watch him nervously chew down on his bottom lip.

“I told you, I went to the bathroom.” you sigh tiredly. “What? You couldn't stand all the couples any longer?”

“No, that's not it…” Jisung mutters, eyes running around your face. Is it really possible that he has been ignoring all the signs so far? “Actually… I wanted to see if you are okay. Because I, well, I care about you.”

As a friend would, you remind yourself. “I’m okay, don't worry.” you sigh and bite your tongue. “We shouldn't hang out this much.” However, the words still roll off your tongue despite your best efforts.

Jisung's eyes grow wide, almost comically so, and he is at a loss for words for a second. “... what? Why?!”

“Because!” you whine, not really wanting to explain how embarrassingly in love you are with him. “If we keep hanging out, we might never have the chance to find a new love.”

“Then don't!” Jisung exclaims. In the shocked silence, he looks just as surprised that he said that as you are. “I mean! You are wonderful and truly one of the coolest people I know! And you deserve true love more than anyone I've ever known! And if it is with someone else, well, that has to be fine with me because I fucked up my own chance already.” he says and his face is gradually turning more and more miserable.

“Jisung, slow down and rewind.” you shut your eyes as you think back of what he said. “You haven't ruined your chances. It just doesn't make sense, why do I give you all these chances when you are clearly not interested in me.” you pout.

Jisung closes his eyes, trying to recompose himself. His mind is doing the thing again where he is letting his stream of consciousness flow without making any sense.

“Guys?”

You both look up to see all your friends watching the two of you, with Felix pointing at you. No, not at you, something above you.

“Oh.” is all Jisung can say as you both stare at the mistletoe sneakily hanging over your heads.

“Oh.” you mirror him, fidgeting with your fingers.

“Took you long enough to stand here.” Felix's soulmate chuckles.

“They trapped us on purpose.” Jisung says, looking at you with a little smile and he is fidgeting with his fingers. “So, uhm… it would be rude not to follow the tradition.” he says in a small, hopeful voice. “Do you think I could… kiss you maybe?”

All air is knocked out of your chest at his question as you stare at each other. Jisung's eyes are filled with hope and worry while your own heart picks up a deafening pace.

“Yes.” is all you mutter and out of the corner of your eye you can see Felix’s soulmate grabbing his hand and dragging him away to give you privacy.

And with that, Jisung plucks up all the courage he has left in him to lean in and press a kiss on your lips. The angle is a little awkward at first, but once you kiss him back, he seems to remember how to move his hands and he places one on your cheek, the other on your waist to pull you closer.

You grab onto his shirt as you pull him flat against your chest, the two of you now fully making out and you swear you can feel yourself levitating. He must feel it too because he holds onto you tighter, worried that you might slip out of his hold if he isn't careful enough.

“Oh my gosh, look away.” Jeongin's date tells him and covers his eyes with a chuckle.

It makes Jisung come back to his senses, and he reluctantly pulls away. You are glad to see you had a similar effect on him as he did on you, because his breathing is shallow and he can't wipe that cute, dumb little smile off his face.

“Holy shit.” he mutters, giggling and holding you tightly against him. “You like me back.”

“Of course I like you, dumbass!” you gasp, hitting his chest. “You could have asked, you know! I had a crush on you since my first day here.”

“You mean we could've been doing this for 2 years?!” he asks and his cheeks are bright pink now. “But- you can't just walk up to the new person on their first day like hi, you are gorgeous, wanna make out? Even though I very much wanted to, but was told I shouldn't!”

“Who told you that?” you chuckle at his honesty, drawing little circles on his chest.

Jisung instinctively glances at Minho who is trying to hide behind his glass of wine. “Doesn't matter.” he shakes his head before he cups your cheeks with both hands. “All that matters is that you don't find me weird for being in love with you.”

“God.” you blush and lean in his cold palms. “No. If you agree to not find me weird for being in love with you too.”

“Oh.” Jisung says and his grin grows unbelievably wider, eyes disappearing almost completely and you have never loved anyone more. “No, I think that's pretty convenient then.” he says before pulling you in for another kiss.

You giggle into the kiss, hugging him tight as the two of you make out.

“Your plan worked.” Felix's soulmate giggles cutely, playing with his hand.

“Yeah, let's pretend this wasn't the backup plan of the backup plan.” Felix grins and he presses a kiss on their forehead. At the end of the day, he was right. This is the best Christmas ever.

The End. ♡

[atinyjules]

Eyes Off You Ft. Park Jisung {moodboard 2}

<<Lianna Suh>>

✩♬₊˚.🎧⋆LIANNA SUH 🫧💭ෆ🦢

[lovelytenlee]

Things are going downnnn

(nobody gets shoved into anything so don’t even try me)

[soobnny]

meet odd — han jisung.

trope. acquaintances to lovers. college au. u live in the same apartment floor. fluff.

synopsis. you get to know han jisung under strange circumstances or alternatively “we live in the same floor and the room between ours always has really loud sex so now we’re both in the main lounge at 2am… do you want this last bit of ice cream?”

word count. 2.3k

warnings. mentions of sex (from the apartment neighbor), cursing

note. hello hello! another skz fic hihi send an ask if u wanna be added to my skz perma taglist :’) i hope u enjoy this silly little story

part 2

There are a lot of things you love about your apartment – the free water and electricity bill, how it's walking distance from your school, the really cold study lounge, and the cat that frequents your small balcony.

For its price, you really couldn’t ask for anything more. The cheap monthly pay goes perfectly with your very strict budget as a broke college student. So, truly, you couldn’t ask for anything more.

Actually, maybe you could.

Within all the great qualities your apartment has to offer, there lies one really, really big setback. The apartment right next to yours and your painfully thin walls. The amount of times it has fucked you up in the head after a long day of classes and exams are immeasurable.

Cue the soft banging of your head against your wall and the pillow around your ears to block out the noises, serene smiling as you greet her the next day as you walk out of the apartment together to head to your early morning classes.

The months before she moved, your apartment had been the safest haven to retreat to – where you could stare at the ceiling after a long day, finish your school work quietly before getting comfortable in your bed, and rewatch a show you’d seen a million times before sleeping to prepare for another battle in your university.

Now, your armor is faltering, and the number of hours of your sleep is decreasing gradually fast. Each night was just repetitive banging of her bed’s headboard against the wall between your apartment rooms and obnoxious moans.

You honestly wouldn’t have minded if they weren’t so fucking loud about it.

And if they didn’t go at it until the crack of dawn.

You hate to be told to be grateful. There’s a clear border for when you’re valid to feel frustration over your situation – when you’re allowed to be ungrateful for the downcast of your neighbor in your life.

Because of your predicament, you’ve found multiple alternatives to aid you in overcoming this temporary challenge. There’s a pair of noise canceling headphones on your nightstand that you begrudgingly used your savings up on to purchase, and you’d been a constant visitor in Seungmin’s dorms.

However, you can only go for so long before you start displaying lower back pains from Seungmin’s old and fucked up couch. His roommate, Jeongin, doesn’t help much either when he enjoys talking your ears off as he does anything but study for his classes.

This is what your new living situation is like. You live off Seungmin’s dying couch and the random stabs of pain on your lower back, your apartment neighbor having the time of her life, and the newly formed bags under your eyes.

You’ve definitely thought about marching up to her room and talking to her about it. But what the hell were you supposed to say? It isn’t exactly the easiest thing to confront people about their sex life.

That’s how you find yourself retreating from your apartment at the ass crack of dawn to sit at the main lounge for a bit, defeated with slumped shoulders and heavy eyes.

They can’t go on for much longer, right? You just had to wait at the main lounge for a few more minutes and you could go back to the comfort of your own bed.

“Good morning.” There’s laughter in the voice of the only other person lounging on the couches of your lobby, legs crossed with a tub of ice cream in his hands.

You recognize him as Han Jisung – the other apartment situated right next to your sex addict neighbor. You’ve only really seen him a few times, in the elevator, leaving for the gym as you come back from school, and you’ve only really shared a brief exchange of hi’s and hello’s. Seeing him in a hoodie and sweatpants with glasses on has your stomach doing a summersault.

He is so painfully handsome, jumping straight out of his hot-boy-with-humor trope.

As soon as your eyes meet, the two of you laugh so loudly and so hysterically. You just know. You know why he’s here at 2am with his tub of ice cream. He’s at the main lounge for the exact same reason you are, and something about that feels so humanizing and funny to you.

There’s a shared understanding in your crinkled eyes and cracked smiles and heavy panting from laughing too hard at your predicament. You don’t care that you look crazy with your messy hair from tossing and turning from your bed all night. Nothing looks or sounds crazy to Jisung.

He’s scooting over the couch to leave the space next to him for you, his hand dropping down to pat the spot so you can sit right next to him.

You’re quick to walk over and sit next to him, and he gives you a smile, fingers drumming over the arm of the sofa with his thigh pressed up against yours slightly that makes your heart beat erratically.

“Want some?” His round boba eyes look at yours as he nudges the tub of ice cream in front of you, twisting his body so he can face you better.

The scent of his cologne is holding you ransom.

None of this feels real, but you swear you can’t be making this shit up. You can’t be making up pretty Han Jisung with his slightly long and a bit disheveled hair and his puffed out cheeks as he chews on his ice cream.

Staring down at his offer, you go over your choices. Although, when someone offers up free ice cream at 2am when you need comfort the most, you don’t think there’s really a need to go over your invisible choices. There’s an obvious answer – the one you take as you grab a spoonful of his ice cream and stuff it in your mouth.

You close your eyes at the cold sensation, a smile creeping up on your face instantly. You’re the happiest you’ve been today already, in this moment, eating ice cream with the boy with worn out converse and the sweetest laugh.

“How have you been coping?”

Jisung knows exactly what you’re talking about, and he finds it hilarious how you’re labeling his response to your shared neighbor as ‘coping mechanisms’. His lips twitch up as he rolls his head back to rest on the cushions.

“You can only go so far with noise canceling headphones.”

“I know right!” Your face lights up as you take another spoonful of ice cream, nodding your head in agreement.

“I tried staying with a friend for a bit, but I’m tired of living off protein shakes and cuddling on the same bed. A double sized bed cannot fit me and Changbin.” He shivers as he recounts his experiences with the boy.

“Changbin as in Seo Changbin from the Music and Performing Arts department?”

“Yeah! Binnie! How do you know him?” Your question makes the smile on his face brighter.

“My friend Seungmin knows him. I’m definitely telling him you shaded his love for protein shakes and that you hate cuddling with him.”

“I don’t hate cuddling with him!” Jisung defends himself, shaking his head aggressively. “I would cuddle with him on a bigger bed.”

“Dude…” He laughs.

Something about how he has experienced the same struggles you have is a little haunting, but also comforting. To know you’re not the only one who has gone through the mockery of begging to stay at a friend’s or purchasing those stupid overpriced headphones.

“Wanna… uh, nevermind.”

“Hm?”

Jisung isn’t the most straightforward person in the world, but something about the way you’re looking at him with wide, curious eyes is intoxicating, and it gives him enough courage to continue talking.

Clearing his throat, he repeats. “Wanna go out for a bit?”

Han Jisung’s voice is very deep and very convincing at 2 in the morning.

“They’re not gonna be done soon?”

He studies your hopeful features and pats your shoulder in comfort. “I don’t wanna ruin your small ray of hope, but they were going at it until 4am last night.”

Grimacing, you drop your head in defeat. “If that’s the case, then let’s go.”

That’s how you find yourselves at a creepy, run-down convenience store near your apartment, purchasing more ice cream and looking through the stalls for anything to buy.

“Hey, Hannie!” You call out to him at the back of the store, and he comes padding over with a splash of giddiness in his heart at the nickname you give him.

His friends have called him that a million times, but it sounds different coming from you. It sounds so natural, like you were always meant to say it.

He bites down his lip to prevent himself from smiling further. His heart flutters at the possibility of you being a constant in his life. Hannie, Hannie, Hannie. It slips out of your mouth so easily that he wonders if the universe purposely gave you two that neighbor for this specific moment.

For him to meet you at the main lounge and invite you to the convenience store (and into his life in the process).

Is this what those stupid male leads feel like in those romantic comedies he binge watched with Changbin?

Jisung used to think it was absolutely ridiculous to meet someone and form an entire life with them in their head, but he finds himself doing the same in all his hypocrisy.

When he arrives to where you’re standing, he watches in amusement as you spend the next few minutes trying your hand at a run-down claw machine – desperately aiming for the pompompurin keychain.

First, you play with eyes of determination and careful movements, and then you’re smashing at the buttons in frustration.

Pretty, he thinks.

He can’t help but swoon at the sight of you with an oversized hoodie, smashing at the claw machine with your eyes half open and your lips pouted in defeat.

“Want me to try?”

You’re aware that claw machines were always faulty and deceiving, but you allow Jisung to try and win the keychain that’s probably cheaper to buy than the amount of money you’ve inserted in the coin slot to play the game.

With the plastic bag of ice cream and candy on his left hand, he uses his right hand to control the stick so he can angle the claw the way he needs it. Leaning forward, he focuses on getting the keychain you’ve been aiming for, pressing the red button after a few seconds of pushing it around.

His lips twitch in a smile when he sees the claw land exactly where he needs it to be, and he sneaks a glance at your anticipating face – heart speeding up at the sight.

“Oh my god. And you got the one I wanted?!” Jisung crouches down to grab the keychain from the prize slot before handing it to you and it immediately finds its home on the zipper of your wallet.

He has a proud smile on his face when he sees you hugging your wallet to your chest with a newfound happiness brightening your features. Even the convenience store lady is impressed at how he was able to get anything from that claw machine at all.

Maybe that’s what the graveyard shift does to you. It tires you out so much that you find someone winning at the claw machine game fun.

With an ice popsicle on your hand and your wallet with your new favorite keychain on the other, you and Jisung start to make your way back to your apartment. It was getting late, and they have to be done by now.

There’s a few moments of peace before you hear Jisung audibly trying to suppress his laughter. He’s trying not to giggle, and you know exactly why.

Your jaw drops, hitting him on his upper arm before sulking.

He doesn’t even need to tell you for you to know he’s laughing at your ice cream eating skills (your popsicle’s already melting and you’ve desperately been trying to finish it before it dissipates for the past few seconds).

There’s a taunting smile on his face as he apologizes. “I’m sorryyy.” He drawls the last syllable, bumping his shoulder with yours.

“You just look so cute.”

Something ricochets in your stomach the moment he says that, and you really hope he can’t hear your heart racing over his obnoxious giggling.

Jisung doesn’t know where he got the confidence to say that aloud. He’s also hoping the streetlights are dim enough for you not to notice the redness on the tip of his ears.

When you arrive, you immediately recognize the boy hurriedly rushing out of the apartment as your neighbor’s boyfriend. And when he speeds past the pair of you with a sheepish and shy smile on his face, you immediately make eye contact with Jisung.

Another fit of laughter breaks out.

And as you laugh and giggle over the poor boy’s obvious embarrassment, your eyes drift over towards Jisung, your newfound friend and how his eyes glint with genuine happiness and how he feels so comfortable to be with.

Similarly, Jisung finds himself mirroring your gaze. Somehow, he feels that starting today, things are definitely going to change between the two of you and the possible shift of your interactions into something more constant makes his heart flutter.

Before today, Han Jisung was just another boy who lived on the same floor as you, who you shared a few small pleasantries with. However, as the pair of you walk back to your rooms with your plastic bags of popsicle and candy wrappers and the hint of laughter still bubbling in your throats, you can tell that this moment right now with him feels like the beginning of something wonderful.

You hate to be told to be grateful, but in the stupidity of your own reflection, you are. For what – you’re starting to think it has something to do with the boy next to you.

[haekisses]

jisung bf txts pls 🤗🙏😭

JISUNG BF TEXTS.

requests are open !

[baby-yongbok]

Poly SKZ!Fake Texts - "Your nails are too long"

✧ Pairing: Ot8!Skz x Afab!Reader - explicit content [ MDNI ] ✧ CW: Themes of marking, Jeongin being a menace and Seungmin being a snitch

✧ a/n: I have writers block & burnout so another fake text post for you all! I write these the most. I'm usually just casually creating them soooo until I can actually finish a fic please enjoy these!❣️

✧ Masterlist ✧

MDNI & Support made by @strangergraphics

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