#incorrect tf quotes

[transfrmrs]

Ironhide, over comms: Prowl, can you come collect your freak of a man please. He's doing things. Prowl: No. I set him loose on purpose. Prowl: He needs enrichment.

[swiftyangx12]

[D/N] = Designation (Meaning your name; Cybertronian name)

Cybertronian![Reader]

[D/N]: I only had Bumblebee for a solar-cycle and a half. But if anything happens to him, I’ll offline everyone in this room and then myself.

Bumblebee: ??? *Confused and concerned*

[headcannonsindisguise]

Megatron: We are getting fewer and fewer usable alternative names for flunkies. "Henchmen" is too gendered and "Henchbots" just doesn't have a nice ring to it. You can't say "Minion" without thinking of the little yellow guys and DONT get me started on the word "goon."

[er-cryptid]

Patreon

[metallictastinglifesupportliquid]

Ghost: How long does your ideal hug last? Y/N: 30 to 40 minutes Ghost, already carrying them: That's a bit impractical Y/N, snuggling in: You said ideal not realistic

[hatsbuckets]

The first time Graves used “all y’all” in front of the Brits, they had to physically restrain themselves from shaking him like a ragdoll.

...

“Now, all y’all just calm down a minute--”

A beat of silence.

Price blinked. Soap tilted his head like a confused retriever. Gaz mouthed ‘all y’all?’ like it was a slur.

“Beg your fuckin’ pardon?” Soap asked.

...

Graves, undeterred:

“Y’all’d’ve done better if you’d waited for backup.”

Gaz made a noise like a computer shutting down.

“I’m sorry... y’all would’ve what?”

Graves: “Would’ve done better.”

Price, flat: “That’s not what you said.”

“I was fixin’ to explain!”

“Fixing what now?”

...

While reviewing blueprints:

“Might coulda added another entry point here.”

Soap stood up. “This is an act o' terrorism."

[skyrigel]

Price: You deserve a prize for being with me through everything.

Soap: Babe, you're my prize.

Ghost *watching this* : You deserve a prize for being with me through everything.

Y/n: Yeah no shit, you can be a bitch sometimes.

[x-x-nyctophilia-writes-x-x]

Y/n: Which one of you was gonna tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water?

Gaz: You... You were putting it in cold water?

Y/n:.......

Soap: Y/n. Answer the question, Y/n.

Y/n: Well... yeah. I thought for, like, 5 years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the “tea-ification” process. I didn't realize there was an actual reason. Besides, do you really think I have the patience to boil water?

Soap: Ye dinnae have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes?

Gaz: Wait, wait- why are you putting it in the microwave to boil it?

Soap: Do ye think ah've got the patience to boil water on the stove?

Gaz: It takes less than a minute!

Y/n: Bestie, is your stovetop powered by the fucking sun??

Gaz: Well, how long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove then?

Y/n: Like, 7 minutes!

Soap: *nods*

Gaz: *sighs* Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat, and it boils in 2 minutes. Less than that if you use a saucepan. 

Soap: ...Ye're puttin' the whole mug on the stove? On medium heat?

Y/n: *crying laughing* Your stove is fucking enchanted!

Price: Every single one of you is a fucking lunatic. 

Ghost: Do none of you own a fucking kettle?

Source

[maybmila]

Stay tf away from him ur scaring him lamb

Messy incorrect quotes there will be more

[connorsui]

Ghost: You have to change jobs

MC: ...I am not changing jobs?

Ghost: And why not?

MC: Why not? ..the tips are great?

Ghost: ...Become a stripper the tips will be better

MC: how will becoming a stripper be better?!

Ghost: I'll be your only client ...the pole would be in my room

MC: ...

.......be serious?

Ghost: I am being serious ill thrown in great insurance

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Damian: What would you do if I was kidnapped?

Dick: Obviously come find you-

Jason: Nothing.

Tim: Wait 30 minutes until they let you go voluntarily.

[lmadsadness]

how to trick your husband into admitting that hes sleep deprived:

[er-cryptid]

Patreon

[metallictastinglifesupportliquid]

Ghost: I cut my finger Y/N: I can kiss it so it'll get better Ghost: That works? Y/N: Yeah my mum used to do it when I was little *later* Ghost: I need you to punch me in the mouth Roach: Fucking finally

[hatsbuckets]

Price: "Keep up, boys. Little sergeants who get left behind get eaten."

Soap: "Did he just call us little?"

Gaz: "I'm more concerned with the getting eaten part."

[perryelornitorrinco]

Wars, in the campfire: anyone wanna share a story?

Fucking Wind: