#incorrect jason grace quotes

[sodamnbored]

Jason: Alright, ready to power through this paperwork?

Reyna: Sorry, I have to run. Got a doctors appointment.

Jason, concerned: Oh no. What’s wrong with you?

Reyna: Nothing. It’s just my annual checkup.

Reyna, on second thought: When did you last have one of those?

Jason: Never. I have never been to the doctor.

Reyna: Well that can’t be smart.

Jason, shrugging: Pssh. I am the picture of health.

Jason, grimacing: *every bone in his body popping as he stands up*

[curiouslymyown]

The Lost Hero

Readers: Who the fuck is Jason?

Jason: idoNTKNO W

[percabethownsmybutt]

percy: the path to inner peace starts with four words

percy: not my fucking problem

[mysterylilycheeta]

Leo: Do you want to see a butterfly? Jason: Yes Nico, Piper, and Annabeth: NO! Leo: *throws the butter across the table* Percy: Fucking majestic

[percabethconvos]

Jason: With how often Annabeth talks about rules I would think she'd be more upset with this

Percy: Oh please Annabeth only learns the rules so she can break them more efficiently

[somewhereincairparavel]

credits to @aroaceleovaldez for generously revealing the font name i had so much fun w this (the fonts called 'centaur')

[sacrifical-lamb-core]

Thalia: So you've definitely got clinical burnout by now

Jason: Oh, that sounds bad. How long does it take to fix, I have a lot of tasks and chores and training to do

Thalia:

Jason: ...what

[demigod-incorrect-quotes]

The fact that Jason was never actually at the Wilderness School with Piper and Leo is so much funnier when you think that he’s like 90% of the trio’s impulse control.

Like you have to assume they have conversations like,

Leo: Remember that time we nearly blew up a classroom then Jason stopped us

Piper: Hahah yeah that was crazy. Wait- Jason was never there

Leo: Oh shit! We actually blew up a classroom!

[pjotwitter]

[coquettemouse]

[halfblood-hero]

Judge: Does the defendant have any special requests?

Percy: Death penalty.

Jason, from the gallery: Percy, it’s just a parking ticket.

Percy, whispering into the mic: Please kill me.

[sodamnbored]

Thalia, handing out snacks on a quest: Here, have a candy bar.

Jason, wrinkling his nose: Oh, no thank you. I’m not big on junk food.

Thalia, rolling her eyes: Oh sure. You used to eat staples for breakfast, but now your body’s a temple.

[lilislegacy]

have you ever thought about how out of all the men in PJO and HOO, percy is the least like annabeth? they complement each other so beautifully, like 2 puzzle pieces that are a perfect fit, but they’re SO different. like imagine…

piper: annabeth is dating one of these 4 men

hazel: *gestures to percy, jason, frank, and leo*

piper: guess which one

random person: hmm… i’d say frank. he’s the son of the god of war and she’s the daughter of the goddess of battle strategy. they’re both incredible fighters and stategists. i bet they are amazing together

percy: 😐

hazel: *nervously laughs*

piper: um, nope! try again!

random person: oh? really? ok well then definitely jason. son of zeus? well mannered, always in control of the situation, very humble and honorable. as a daughter of athena, he’s totally her type. they are both very calm and level-headed. they both are leaders and know how to weigh the options and outcomes quickly in a tough situation. plus, they are both blonde with light eyes, so they would have beautiful babies!

percy: 😒

piper: *nervously laughs*

hazel: um… still no! one more try!

random person: oh wait… i’m so stupid! it’s obvious!

hazel: there you go! i also think it’s obv-

random person: it’s leo! why didn’t i see it? he’s a mechanic. she’s an architect. they are perfect together! she’s a creator and he’s a fixer. their brains work so much like each other. they’re basically meant to be! oh and they are both from the south!! and i bet-

piper: IT’S PERCY! she is dating percy. perseus jackson. you know, the one on the left? tall, tan, lean, black hair, green eyes? him and only ever him.

random person: oh

percy: 🤨

random person: the… the son of poseidon?? the hot sarcastic bad boy? with that troublemaker look about him? the one with severe mood swings, and who gets expelled from every single school he goes to?

percy: *awkwardly looks down at his hands*

random person: HE’S annabeth chase’s boyfriend??

annabeth: damn right he is 🥰

[percabethownsmybutt]

annabeth: why are you following me?

percy: because we’re dating now

annabeth: okay… what about grover?

percy: we’re a package deal

grover: buy one idiot, get one free

[luh-lloyd-garmadone]

Greeks: Yeah Jason is cool ig

Romans: We’ve only had Percy for a day and a half but if anything happened to him we’d kill everyone in the room and then ourselves

[theprinceofdarknesssquad]

Will: Look, I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like Nico a little bit. Percy, holding Will's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation. Will: No, that's our joint tombstone. Percy: My mistake.