#incorrect gone quotes

[dianaladrislovebot]

caine: i think i’ve learned some valuable lessons from this

sam: i’m assuming that they’re all horrible distortions of the lessons you actually should have taken away

caine: death isn’t real and i’m basically god

[abcwordsurge]

Sam: (whispering) I think Astrid's mad at me

Edilio: What makes you say that?

Sam: Watch. Hey Astrid?

Astrid: Fellow associate.

[reineydraws]

any fan of kakashi is a fan of jason todd send tweet

[chasingthestarss]

James: I’ve got a question to ask you

Regulus: as long as it’s not “will you marry me”

James: *silence

Regulus: wait

Regulus: was it?

Regulus: was it “will you marry me”

James: Well I’m not going to ask now

Regulus: no! Restart!

James: moments gone

Regulus: then bring it back!

[percabethconvos]

Percy: The world is cold and dark and we all die alone Chiron: Percy I'm sorry Annabeth had to leave camp early but we need to get on with this meeting

[lilliejareau]

“we listen and we don’t judge.”

penelope: one time reid gave me a tiny potted plant but it turns out it was actually plastic and he didn’t know so i pretended to water it for three years.

bau: we listen and we don’t judge.

JJ: sometimes when Henry wakes me up by jumping on my back, I feel like throwing him across the room for a split second.

bau: we listen and we don’t judge.

emily: one time when I was mad at Morgan for not sticking up for me during a case, I dipped his travel toothbrush in the toilet and didn’t rinse it off after and he used it about an hour later.

morgan: bitch what?!?

emily: we listen and we don’t judge!

[thebat-musicman]

AU where Jason was dead for 2 years longer than he was in canon

Leslie: The results are back. Jason, you’re physically two years younger than you should be.

Jason: You mean…

Tim, jumping out of his chair: YES!!!

Leslie: I’m sorry, Jason. Tim is physically older than you now.

Tim: THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!

Jason: This cannot be happening.

Tim, hugging him: Don’t worry, Jason. I’ll be the best big brother ever.

Jason, haunted: I’m going to ask the Joker to try again.

[jade-bright]

(If I ever write it) Maybe I write this into the Royal Sterek au ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Stiles: ...

Stiles: What?

Peter: *ducking his head to hide his smile*

Talia: My son is currently busy, and will be for some time. In apology for not being able to inform you himself, Derek has decided to send you this wolf to keep you company during his absence

Derek, stuck in wolf form: *sitting beside his mom, looking anywhere but Stiles so he doesn't have to see his expression*

Stiles: (suspicious) The wolf doesn't exactly seem pleased to be here?

Derek: *gets up and walks over to Stiles, and wags his tail*

Peter, very amused: Well, would you look at that, seems like he's plenty happy to be with you

Derek: *Turns his head and growls at his uncle*

Stiles, smiling softly: Careful Peter, *gently grabs the wolf's head and turns it back towards him* my husband seems to have entrusted me with a wolf, and I doubt anyone will fault me if he bites you

Derek: *relaxes and starts to gently nose at his hands*

wolves don't actually purr :( so the nose nudging and stuff is just gonna have to replace the purring, or maybe I ignore it, who knows

[celestial-artisan]

Alastor: That is absolutely ridiculous, Vox does not have a crush on me. Angel Dust: Yes he does. Sir Pentious: Yes he doesss. Vox, from television screen: Yes I fucking do you goddamn idiot.

[amybaulover]

Penelope: I sleep with a knife under my pillow

Derek: weak, I sleep with two.

JJ: you're both pathetic.

Derek: oh yeah? and what do you sleep with?

JJ: Emily.

[dianaladrislovebot]

merry fucking christmas where’s the hard liquor

- lana arwen lazar, probably

[abcwordsurge]

Astrid: You know, you two don't do typical romantic stuff

Sam: We had a romantic dinner the other day

Quinn: Yeah, it was very nice

Astrid: You microwaved a pizza, and I WAS THERE

[cupidsncheerios]

i am still not out of these dumb memes. here.

part 1 part 3 part 4 part 5

[cod-dump]

Laswell, texting: It's been awfully quiet over there Nik

Nik: *sends a picture of Gaz holding back a soaking wet Price from Ghost who is holding a limp Soap who has a bucket on his head*

Nik: Oh it is not quiet

[percabethconvos]

Annabeth: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my need to prove myself, I’ll wait

Percy: You and me!

Annabeth, already crying: Okay

[lilliejareau]

spencer: you let your cat sleep in your bed with you?

emily: reid, i’d let him represent me in court