#in my defense i am neurodivergent

[the2lees]

i love him so much.

i too, have oldest sibling trauma.

except i have 4 sisters and while im the responsible one i am also the most likely to be arrested

those turtles huh

Bonus points if you can guess who my favorite hamburger is, it’s quite difficult so don’t be too harsh if you get it wrong 

[wanderingmind867]

I've made a whole bunch of posts today (at least 10 or 15, if not more), yet it feels like a good chunk of these posts have recieved zero notes. And that's really bugging me. Because i've always had a neurotic streak when it comes to making posts, but i'm also just feeling like nobody's noticed the posts. And I put work into writing them, sometimes. So i guess my brain is almost trying to force me into guilting people over this, which actually makes me feel even more guilty. It's complicated.

Either way, I just want to know if anyone's seen my posts. Because i'd like to know that i wasn't just talking to myself with all of these posts, and that there was someone who saw and appreciated at least some of them.

[doctorsiren]

Another creature in your ask box? (Art by me hehe)

TRUCYYYYYY she is so me but also my daughter but also so me

[scarefox]

This episode they really showed how Uea wants sex to distract himself to make the bad feelings go away for a while and King is the only safe option (not the best way of coping maybe atm but it gets better). Hope they will make him talk about it because I feel many in the audience still don’t understand the link between sex and comfort and coping especially for an abuse victim who always turns to it after triggering events (still think this part is more about the mom, cause whenever the stepdad is part of the trigger he can’t have sex or cuddles ... at least can’t enjoy it as we have seen in this episode). Shortly said, an orgasm gives you dopamine, and it’s all your mind and body focuses on in that moment. Reasons why this could end up in an addiction under the wrong circumstances. Under the right ones it can be therapeutic and have an antidepressant effect.

Uea is a bit torn with King. The caring side of King is an unexpected surprise for him every time. He doesn't really expect kindness from people. But he's glad whenever he receives it from people he trusts. Which King became a part of way too fast for Uea to admit (he’s a player after all). That’s why he rarely shows King his smiles when he’s fond of him. I think the cake scene was one of the rare moments he truly showed him this kind of vulnerability to him (him being truly happy, it’s a delicate feeling easily snatched away under his circumstances). He also took a long time to even understand that King really means it, that this birthday cake is really for him because King really wants to make him happy and he’s allowed to take it. I wonder if the little cake fight and unceremonial bite into the cake is an emotional defense from Uea to not get too deep into vulnerable emotions and turn it into fun / silly & sexy moment instead while still keeping the good vibe.

He’s not ready for an emotional bond with him yet when they clearly stated from the beginning this will just be about sex and they don’t even like each other (we all know that’s a lie). I suspect Uea has trust issues as well since his stepdad always acts nice, caring and misunderstood... so Uea needs a while to learn if people really mean it or if they just want something from him.

I bet that will become a big issue at some point, when they both think the other has no feelings while they secretly do have feelings. I fear Uea will push King away for a while when their feelings get clearer.

[boomerang109]

i've felt awful all morning and i just had a full meal and suddenly i feel better? crazy how this adulting thing works

[frmulcahy]

Feeling the hyperfixations going dormant without a new one coming in or old one resurfacing and I’m going to go insane

[penguinslurs]

Attempted to take my meds with boba tea today and it went a little like this:

I put meds in mouth. I take big gulp of boba tea. I attempt to swallow pill. Instead of swallowing pill, I accidentally SHOTGUN TWO WHOLE BOBA PEARLS DOWN MY THROAT. Pill still hasn’t been swallowed.

Ok. That was bad. There is still a boba pearl in my mouth. Chewing is in order. I attempt to chew the remaining boba pearl. I miss. I instead CHEW THE OFF-BRAND ADDERALL. Fun fact! Fake adderall Does Not Taste Good.

My mouth is now dry and bitter. I take another sip of boba tea. This was a mistake. There are now MORE BALLS in my mouth and I have experienced the flavor of adderall-flavored boba tea. Adderall flavored boba tea is Not Good. I still haven’t swallowed the pill. I desperately chew the boba to a swallow-able level. The basic-bitch adderall continues to be chewed as I do this. It is so bitter. It tastes so bad.

I finally manage to swallow the pill. I have been scarred forever from this experience. Did I learn my lesson? Probably not.

[txttletale]

(In regards to the reclaiming retard post) I don't know where this idea that no autistic people that have been derogatorily called a retard wants to reclaim it comes from. That's basically exclusively who I've seen try to reclaim it. It just feels like lying about other neurodivergent people for clout.

it is very silly to be like "hmm. This post doesnt line up with my experiences. i assume the op is lying for clout." i reblogged it because i have had the exact same experience sivi (presumably! i do not speak for her) has had, where the overwhelming majority of people talking about 'reclaiming retard' are people on here who go on the defensive after someone's pointed out that they should maybe stop calling disabled people they disagree with on the computer retards all the time. notice however how i am now simply accepting that you have had different experiences to me instead of accusing you of "lying for clout"

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

🎶🎶🎶 for later!

AITA for not listening to certain genres of music?

I (24m) am in college, and work in a lot of advocacy/multicultural spaces. I'm a POC, but not African American which becomes relevant. I have very narrow music tastes, I'm neurodivergent and tend to listen to the same songs ad nauseum, but I was recently told by a colleague that it comes across as racist/anti-black if I say I don't like rap/genres with black roots (jazz, blues, etc.). This person also makes comments about "decolonizing" your music taste/art appreciation/media consumption in general, but beyond educating yourself about themes/roots of media I honestly don't know how to be unproblematic in this kind of situation.

I say "I don't like x" about a majority of music genres, but always with the caveat of "I understand it's roots/history, appreciate it's vocals/message/tecniques, but it's just not for me" and I mean this very genuinely. I've take multiple classes in music theory/history in high school and college and have played multiple intstuments where i would perform music across multiple genres that i didnt personally seek out in my day to day.

I don't shit talk other people's music taste either, and if someone is playing something I don't personally seek out I'll still listen without comment. I really just wanted to check and see if saying what I said can really be considered racist, and if so is there a way I can phrase it better/explain myself without sounding/feeling defensive? I'm not looking for anyone to put down my colleague at my expense, genuinely want this to be educational/clarifying for me!

[kaiserin-erzsebet]

why does it suck?

A couple of things which may or may not be specific to me:

1. I feel like I know more than 99% of people on this. Which is expected when you're producing knowledge. But it also means:

- I cannot read Wikipedia for fun anymore. Because it's wrong about too much.

- Books about my topic have gone from fun to infuriating to read.

- I also know how much other people with similar interests get wrong. But I don't want to be a jerk to people who only have published information because it isn't their fault that they don't know.

- I get mad at signs in museums.

2. I cannot turn off the emotions I feel about this project. My neurodivergence makes it so that my special interests are always imbued with a lot of emotional weight. But academia has a tendency to view that strong of an attachment as bias, so I have to keep a lot of those feelings inside.

3. At least for me, I developed a defense mechanism growing up where I curl up protectively around my special interest and only share with people I trust. Turns out this is impossible if it is also something I'm presenting at conferences. I'm still working on not feeling like every presentation is opening up my insides and showing vulnerability.

4. I've cried about this topic so many times. I cannot admit this to most people because I am a woman in academia.

With all that said, I still feel fortunate that I'm getting paid to research my favorite thing. I just think it's worth acknowledging that it also comes with these other components.

[oshinohoshi]

Oshi no Ko - In defense of Ai's "lies"

Warning: Manga spoilers below.

This post is a reaction to people occasionally saying, "Maybe Ai was the real villain all along" or "But Ai lies" as evidence of her character being sucky. And just... come on. I know, dear reader, that you understand how silly that is but I'm gonna spell it out anyway.

I always want to say in response: "Who did Ai hurt with her lies?" There is one character you may be thinking of and I'll get to that, but the person she hurt the most was herself. Because she told herself nonsense about how she was an irresponsible, dirty liar.

This breaks my fragile heart because this, right here, is the lie. Her negative self-talk stemming from a childhood filled with abuse and loneliness framed her issues with understanding love as if it were her fault and not, I dunno, the woman who fed her glass (see 45510) and abandoned her.

What were Ai's lies? Should they even be classified as such? Let's break it down:

She hid her kids. I would hardly call this a lie so much as a totally normal boundary for a celebrity with a public and private life. It only mattered because of the absurd standards for idols. It was more of a lie by omission anyway, but if someone asked her point blank if she had kids (maybe after one too many times nearly mentioning her kids lol) it would be perfectly acceptable to say no.

She put on a happy face at all times, hiding her emotions. This primarily hurt herself because it increased her social isolation and caused the girls in B Komachi to view her as untouchable and inhuman. Nino wouldn't have been so hurt by their fight if Ai better knew how to express herself, or maybe even if she had shown that she cared by yelling back, but that's a lot to expect from someone with Ai's background and lack of experience with relationships.

There's also Ai's neurodivergence. I don't want to speculate too much about that as I am not hugely familiar with the topic besides what I've learned by googling, but it can cause difficulty with social situations and expressing emotions. Sounds pretty familiar.

We are told in ch 137: "She could neither love nor trust people. She was timid and sensitive. She got hurt after being at odds with her friends. She really was an ordinary girl you could find anywhere. That's why she lied. A big lie that concealed her weak self completely."

Another description for this is a defense mechanism. Ai was not raised in an environment where vulnerability was met with reassurances. Moreover, as an idol it was hammered into her that she needed to hide anything about herself that could be deemed as negative or ugly. Anything that made her human. Ichigo told her at age 12 to lie until she understood love. She was set up from the get go to consider herself nothing but a liar.

She lied to Hikaru when she said, "I can't love you." This is actually not a big lie so much as the most negative take on her emotions. She wasn't sure she could love him but she wanted to. The real untruth is the way she flippantly strolled out the door as if she didn't care about him. But that doesn't make her a villain and her reasons are obvious given everything told to us about her in ch 137 and her avoidant tendencies she used as a shield to protect herself. She handled the breakup with all the grace of an elephant wearing ice skates but I'm not about to blame her for it.

She lied about love. I saved the big one for last. The thing her characterization hinges on. But it was hardly a lie at all. Not only because she actually did love her kids or that she was trying so hard to love which was its own form of love ("lies are love"), but because the idea of having to love her fans in a personal manner that goes beyond appreciation is actually ridiculous.

Nobody expects an office worker to love their clients or someone working at Starbucks to love their customers. But as an idol she was marketed as a perfect, pure girl, someone men could project their fantasies onto and who was supposed to genuinely love each and every one of them in return. It's nonsense. Ai was certainly not the only idol failing to live up to this. She just took it incredibly hard because she felt her lack of understanding of love was a personal failing.

We are told that Ai was a liar but she was honest as often as she hid the truth. She asked Gotanda to film the real her after he called her out about putting on an act. She was candid in the fan Q&A in 45110. In Viewpoint B she wrote a song that expressed her genuine feelings. She adored her kids so much that she slipped up and nearly talked about them on camera. Ai wanted to share how they had impacted her life but couldn't except through veiled statements. She was completely honest with Ryosuke, treating the moment as if she was in a confessional detailing her sins.

None of this is to say Ai was perfect. We're bonked over the head with the fact that Ai was a regular person who could get angry, who was too timid to push herself to connect with her fellow members of B Komachi, who undoubtedly did and said things that did not reflect her best self just as we all do. But I don't think liar is her defining trait. It's probably not even in her top five. I would describe her as sensitive, loving, mischievous, playful, and intelligent (she could be airheaded but she was incredibly savvy about her image) before I'd call her a liar.

There is no Real Villain Ai. And I can't tell you how glad I am that the theory some people held about her forcing sex on Hikaru was thoroughly debunked. Right up there with people speculating that Crow Girl is actually reincarnated Ai. That just made me laugh. The last thing reincarnated Ai would do is jerk her kids around.

We're told Ai was a liar because that's how she viewed herself. It's not an objective fact or at least not a fact that trumps everything else about her. So the next time someone says "Ai was a liar" my response would be "OK. So what?"

[lonewolfinthetardis]

What are some of your favorite tf2 hcs if you have any?

God, I have so many... I am of course a firm believer in the hc that all the mercs are queer, under the trans umbrella, and neurodivergent.

This is one that @jamisonwritestf2trash brought up, Medic had spoiled Archimedes so much that he's basically created a monster. Archimedes is an absolute diva, and will throw a fit when told "no". Medic also refers to himself as Archimedes' 'father' (the German word for father though).

Pyro in some part of their mind, knows exactly what it's doing. "Pyroland" is mainly a trauma response that stemmed from a massive incident that happened when they were younger.

Spy is actually very careful with his money, due to his family being very poor. Most of the flash stuff he does is for show.

Demo learnt how to play the piano from his father, before his sight eventually failed. He loves to play it because it reminds him of when he'd hang out with his father.

Sniper loves to "go bush" when he has time. He'll grab the bare essentials and just go off. When he comes back, he's visibly happier and less stressed.

Soldier has very bad hearing, and Engie made him some hearing aids. He also knows a little bit of ASL from Pyro. Soldier does not like it when people bring up his hearing, and will get very defensive over it.

Scout is absolutely crazy at folding clothes, growing up in a house with 8 other people taught him how to fold clothes quickly and effectively. I also hate when people make him a misogynist, his ma would disown his ass so fast.

Heavy is amazing at chess, and is a brilliant strategist. He's fiercely protective of his mama, sisters, Medic, and his team.

Oh Engineer, I could go on about this guy. He loves being the "Team dad" and cooking for the team, especially if someone helps him. If given the chance, this man will infodump for HOURS.

-------

My other headcanons are mostly about Engineer (I have a massive list of them). I have so many other headcanons, I might make a post about them. Don't be afraid to ask me about any of my other hcs about the mercs.

[bow-wow-wark-wark]

Toshiro defense post

Hi everyone! So, I know this topic has been discussed a bunch of times before xd, but I keep seeing people say nonsense about Toshiro so… strap in cause this is another Toshiro explanation post!!

IMPORTANT: I do want to clarify that it’s fine if you dislike Toshiro. After all, everyone has the right to dislike characters so I’m not going to stop you, I know it’s not that serious. But then I’d like to ask you to stop spreading misinformation about him, use him for angst stuff that mischaracterizes him or any of that xd. Like, dislike him in peace xd but stop using him as a villain. Also, before any of you say “I understand his complexities but…”  let me stop you bc most of the time you don’t xd. Like you acknowledge the microaggressions and other things but use other poor excuses for hating him or invalidate that, so please read this post and keep an open mind!! Finaly, this post is going to touch on and disprove the following topics: 1. Toshiro hates Laois (together with stuff like how he is ableist and an asshole) 2. Toshiro is a huge hypocrite for liking Fallin (together with how he doesn’t really love her) and 3. Toshiro was racist towards itsutzumi (without getting too into complex race politics). I will also back up my arguments by content in the anime and some of the extras from the manga, despite that I will not delve on spoiler related content so, let’s get to it!

1. Toshiro hates Laios.

Something that people use to hate on Toshiro is his famous fighting scene with Laois, saying things like “Toshiro was ableist towards Laois” “Toshiro is a hypocrite because he complains about poor communication, but why didn’t he say anything himself?” “Toshiro hates Laois” but before we tackle this let’s recap:

In this scene they fight over the fact that Laois has poor social skills and doesn’t understand the ways Toshiro expresses his annoyance at him and his desire to have some space, he also accuses Laois of being unserious about saving Fallin and even says that he has always hated Laois. This scene resonated with MANY people that have experienced this exact same conversation with “friends” who would get mad at them for showing neurodivergent traits, I am one of those people as well so I can totally understand.  So, them seeing themselves in Laois and their acquaintance in Toshiro people accuse him of being ableist, but this:

Is not that. First of all, it’s important to note that Toshiro’s complaints come from his cultural background as an easterner, where he is used to subtle communication, and by his upbringing as an heir of his island (something that is explained by this thread in great detail!! But to summarize it basically says that he has become more reserved due to his retainer’s overbearing nature and do to being compared to his father constantly and by being surrounded by rumors of his family, so he chooses to not speak out as to cause more trouble for himself). Second of all he doesn’t really do anything ableist… many people say that they hate him “because he was a huge dick to Laois” but apart from expressing his frustration by yelling and fighting, something rude of course, what ableist or horrid thing did he do?  He didn’t call him names or anything, and even acknowledges the fact that Laois is someone who acts in good fate and doesn’t mean any harm to him, but he still dislikes his actions (not a bad thing at all). It’s also important to note that Toshiro is TIRED in this scene, he hasn’t eaten or slept in 3 whole days and suddenly he bumps into a bunch of problems and the girl he loves turned into a monster by this guy who seems WAY to relaxed about it and who he already has gripes against, my question is: Who wouldn’t lash out? Additionally, this scene is important for him too!! As he finally stands up for himself and expresses his feelings, something that drives his character development into being a better guy.

On top of all that, it’s also important to note that Toshiro himself shows signs of being neurodivergent just that in a different way than Laois. For example, his hyperfocus on saving Fallin making him ignore his needs, his overreliance on social cues to understand others, his stand offish an awkward nature that doesn’t let him connect with the people around him and his difficulty to express his needs. These are things many neurodivergent people can relate to, and dare I say, things Laois shares with him!! They both suck socially which is literally what causes this, so what makes him so different? So hard to forgive? What makes it hard to understand him but not Laois? And let’s all not forget the fact that Laois has been pulling a microaggression on him by calling him a butchered version of his name this entire time! It doesn’t make him evil! But it shows how they have a complex relationship where both sides where right. (Also, I know this is a complicated topic and I know there are poc people who hate him BUT, to me the issue is that he 1. Has a meltdown and 2. He’s not white. Like it is very known and said that poc cannot express themselves in such freeing ways as our white counterparts, so it’s harder to be nd and poc than white and nd, which is somehow the case for Toshiro as well xd. Many people say that he shows how people only like nd traits when they’re palatable, but this argument goes back to you, you might find nd traits better when it’s on a white guy you can baby and not on the Asian guy who should know better. None of them should have to, characters are allowed to do bad things and fix those errors).

 Lastly, Toshiro mends his mistake immediately!!  He doesn’t hate Laois, if anything he holds complicated feelings towards him for a while, which most of the cast do (more on this later). Some people seriously act like this didn’t happen, but at the end of the fight he admits that he doesn’t hate Laois (media literacy check but not everything a character says while angry is true!!) but envies his free spirited and straight forward nature. And if this doesn’t seem enough to mend his mistake, he gives Laois the calling bell, which will immediately send someone to help him and fetch him to the east. Would you have a guy that you HATE as a refugee in your country? Plus, he’s serious about the bell too! This scene wasn’t added in the anime, but there’s a point where Toshiro and Kabru are leaving and they keep hearing the bell, which they point out as annoying, despite that Toshiro always keeps it with him and says that if the noise stops, he will know to fetch Laios. If he really hated him, why would he keep a loud object around him just to make sure he is safe? (There’s literally a scene where it goes off after Laois throws it and he just acts embarrassed that it’s interrupting a conversation, but he doesn’t leave it or anything).

2. Toshiro is a huge hypocrite for liking Fallin.

With that point out of the way, lets get to the 2nd problem: Toshiro’s crush on Fallin. Let me preface once more by saying I LOVE Farcille and think they’re a very cute ship, but using Toshiro as your angst bait is not cool and super ooc (clarification: I don’t mean like a respectful joke about him getting rejected or exploring marcille’s thoughts on his proposal, I mean bashing on him hard or saying that he would intervene or disapprove of a farcille relationship).

Ok so in this case, many people say that Toshiro is a HUGE hypocrite because of 2 things: 1. He likes Fallin but dislikes Laois even though they’re almost identical, and 2. Because he claims to love Fallin while abandoning her and condemning black magic.

So, let’s get into why this is not true:

We have already discussed how Toshiro does not dislike Laois, but pushing that out of the way, the one thing he “dislikes” about Laois is the one thing he does not share with Fallin, which is their social awareness. Fallin is significantly more socially aware and tends to do things as to avoid burdening others, putting her needs aside, she’s someone who is very thoughtful and mindful of the people around her, unlike Laois who, while also thoughtful and kind, is not as receptive (Also crazy to note that her and Toshiro share this “not fully sharing my feelings as to not burden others” thing). Besides that, he likes that Fallin likes bugs/nature (the same thread from before has a nice possible explanation if you want to check it out) something that could be related to Laois’s love for monsters which, fun fact, he doesn’t hate at all!! Something that, funnily enough, others seem to give Laois flack over but not Fallin (crazy how there aren’t as many people shitting on Marcille or chilchuck for this?? specially since Fallin also likes monsters but Marcille never says anything about it and centers her annoyance on Laois? Wow… (I don’t hate Marcille for this either btw, I’m being sarcastic). And on the topic of this double standard, I’ve seen many people ask how he thinks he can marry into the Toudens while hating Laois (bad), while at the same time seeing so many “omg marcille thinks the only downside to marrying Fallin is Laois” (funny), crazy how its bad when Toshiro does it, huh? (Even crazier is the fact it’s only half true for both of them xd, they like Laois he is their friend)

So, once more he dislikes that Laois doesn’t give him space but likes Fallin because she does, especially because they aren’t very close at all. Toshiro has a hard time getting close to others and it’s stated that he tends to put barriers around himself with people who are “close” to him like maizaru and Hien. But since Fallin is an acquaintance at best it’s easy to like her from afar and the traits she seems to show outwardly.

Which leads me to the next point: Toshiro mani pixie dream girlifies Fallin. It is true that Toshiro has idealized her and doesn’t know her too well because they don’t talk but... is that a crime? There are many characters who hold biased opinions on others (like kabru with Laois or senshi with marcille or marcille with the orcs, etc.) and that doesn’t really get critiqued either. I don’t think it’s the sign of a horrid man for him to like Fallin without knowing her to well xd, it’s pretty normal for a crush and also if you consider his nature. Besides, this is once more influenced by his background: in one scene chilchuck mentions how the proposal thing is common in the east + he is an heir xd, so it’s only logical to be thinking about marriage, specially since his dad has high expectations for him (something that I know has not yet been shown in the anime, but it is present on extra manga content). It’s important to note also, that he doesn’t claim that he knows her best, puts words on her mouth or push his feelings towards her either. He proposes, she says that she will think about it and as far as the anime is concerned, he waits patiently for her answer. He doesn’t say “curse you woman you are coming with me!” or anything like that, and even if he expresses that he wants to leave with her to the east, that is ONLY if she says yes and agrees to that, so its illogical to say any of these things without proof.

Now onto the 2nd main point of this section: He abandoned Fallin and hates black magic. 1st of all, he didn’t abandon Fallin, he left to gather his retainers to search for her in a way he thought more efficient and once we see him again, he HASN’T EATEN OR SLEPT IN 3 DAYS OUT OF DEDICATION ALONE!! (If you use the argument that he abandoned Laois, that can also be explained by this). Now, him hating dark magic and claiming to turn in Marcille to the elves. This is not the best, since it poses conflict for our protagonists but 1. He doesn’t even end up doing that and helps them out after all is explained and 2. Put yourself in his shoes, what would you do if your crush turned into a monster that killed all your party? “Toshiro didn’t love Fallin enough to accept her as a monster unlike Marcille” Are you guys listening to yourselves? What he sees is a Fallin that has been desecrated and turned into a monster, something that will harm her and others + he’s not a magic specialist so how would he know or believe that they could turn her back to normal? He condemns Marcille but not out of lack of love, but I would say because of it, as far as he knows this could only turn worse for her anyways. Also, Kabru points out his illogical line of thought, claiming that it would be better for Fallin to die then, and Toshiro realizes how stupid he sounded a moment ago xd; Kabru points out how he also would have done anything to save her, and he backs down in agreement.

Once more, maybe annoying but not bad guy material. What’s more, this one is a really pressing matter as I have seen SO many Farcille fan artists and editors using him as an easy villain that hates Marcille (he is canonically scared of her) or as a cuck that doesn’t get Fallin. Somone pointed out once how he gets treated like a female character that gets in the way of an mlm ship and I agree. But while sometimes funny, it gets absurd at times and tends to border on making him someone he is not. I’ve even seen people say he’s homophobic (XD) or make him the token straight guy (something that in most fandoms means being an annoying incel character). In addition, many people say that Fallin would hate him for being “mean” to Laois but 1. She is very kind and would probably understand him. 2. If she realizes Laois has forgiven him, I don’t think she would meddle in to fix her brother’s problems because he wouldn’t want that and that’s just not her personality.

2.5 Small section.

Before we move into the last section, I’d like to add a small section called: you guys don’t understand Toshiro’s personality. Let’s be clear Toshiro is a shy, quiet, reserved, sentimental, rigid and half-hearted guy. It’s not common for him to start things, he tends to leave problem solving to authorities, he isn’t too confident in himself, and he is also an outcast in his homeland. Yet so many people describe him as being arrogant of self-absorbed and I really don’t know where that is coming from. Like, I’ve seen a bunch of people say, “oh how can he think he’s good enough for Fallin?” or variations of the sort but... I don’t think he thinks that he just decides to shoot his shot anyways. I’ve also seen some people describe him as some “pretentious rich asshole”, but this is also never showed or implied in text. Toshiro does not flaunt his wealth; he doesn’t act like he is better than ANYONE in the party, he just has money by being an heir (something not fun for him) and that’s it, but he doesn’t even use his status to get anything from anyone either., so… where is this coming from? (Racism? a need for a bad guy? who knows?) Plus, many people seem to dislike him because he is an aristocrat but… the system is not the same as being like a prince, his family just has influence in the east. Besides, characters like Laois or Mithun were also well off and from influential families and don’t get that type of flack. There’re also characters like Laois and Kabru, who express the desire to join this “aristocratic/monarchy” system by becoming king and lord of the dungeon. Who, then again, don’t get that flack.  

3. Toshiro was racist towards itsutzumi.

With that out of the way, we have reached the final point: Toshiro owns people (making him racist ig). Ok so let’s preface by saying 2 things: 1. Dungeon meshi is not a racist story, but a story with racism and many complicated race relations that get treated respectfully for the most part. With this is included, the complex treatment of beast skins and other races seen as less human like kobolds or ogres like Tade.  2. The retainers are not slaves; they are servants for Toshiro’s family.

Ok, so it is true that Toshiro’s father bought itsutzumi from people who were abusing her (and Tade as well but people don’t bring her up when talking about this xd) and later put her to work as a retainer, so therefore he owns her right? Yeah, but not as a slave. Slaves do forced labor and are kept in inhumane conditions, which she is not, as she is given a home, education and the most labor she does is chores (which she usually avoids anyways) and probably some fighting of the sort. In fact, you could even say that she was enslaved prior to being bought by Toshiro’s father (not that this is an excuse for buying her necessarily, but once more this relates to complicated race things). It is also important to acknowledge that as a beast skin itsutzumi (a non-human) is seen as less valuable and gets treated unfairly by maizuru. And while it can border on othering behavior, like being tied up for misbehaving, this is once more pushed by maizuru and not any of the other retainers or Toshiro himself.  With this argument usually comes the mention of the cursed collar that was kept on her, which is definitely a bad thing, but once more it is made by maizuru without Toshiro having ANY knowledge about it. I don’t judge any anime only for not knowing this, but in one extra it is revealed that Maizuru actually used the collar on Toshiro himself as a child, so that he would not leave too far from her side, so she explains that she made a similar one for itsutzumi; in this extra he looks surprised and remembers the traumatizing experience so... yeah, he didn’t know.

Additionally, many people compare the argument that he doesn’t own them, but his father does with the sixpence drama from a long time ago. Saying that this doesn’t excuse the behavior and that he should have done something, but that can also be explained. 1. Toshiro actually doesn’t meaningfully associate with any of the retainers prior to leaving to the island, (as explained by the adventurer’s bible and other extras) except for Hien as they are childhood friends and Maizuru. Besides that, he holds no relation to any of them, so he could not have known about itsutzumi’s situation, and it’s even shown that he doesn’t know how he should treat her at all. Despite that Toshiro does show consciousness towards their situation, saying that he would like to talk to Tade about being so adoring of him and his father, but he isn’t sure how to approach the issue. With that, we could assume the same could be said about his feelings towards itsutzumi. 2. “He left her to die”, technically no. They know she’s a capable fighter, so they probably didn’t see any problems with leaving her and also, itsutzumi scapes his party. Meaning that they know she doesn’t like them so why would they go back and search for her? If anything, Toshiro might have thought of it as an easy way to give her freedom, once more, why would you force someone back when you know they don’t want to be there?

“Why didn’t he let her go sooner?” This is explained by the first bit that he didn’t really know her and by asecond thing: contrary to popular belief, Toshiro doesn’t have such a big control of the retainers as it may seem, and it is ultimately maizurus or his father’s choice as to what to do with them. Like he didn’t want them to come with him to the island, but they don’t heed to that and come anyways. So, what makes anyone think that he could just change his fathers wishes? So yeah, he doesn’t own people they work for his family and that’s it.

So, this is the end of the post, if you read all of this, I greatly thank you and I hope I could make at least one of you change your mind. If not, oh well. Once more is valid to dislike characters, you can keep doing that but stop seriously stop with the angst bait or misinformation spread. That is all I want to say, so thank you again and see you later.

[not-terezi-pyrope]

I am in a constant state of active psychological warfare to avoid clicking on those fucking ads where a guy has to bounce a bullet off of angled walls and keeps missing, or where they try and fail to plug a wall to keep out bees. I swear those ads should genuinely be considered a psychological attack, it's so manipulative, I have zero desire to download your fucking scam ads and yet you will prey on my compulsive desire to solve puzzles by putting one in front of my face and then doing it wrongly repeatedly. Someone with a lesser will than I would be sucked in, and even I have to keep up an active defense. This is like targeted persecution of neurodivergent people lol, I'm sure it works well! BUt only because it is lowkey evil.

I hate ads like that. What happened to the shitty slideshows from when we were kids. Honestly though I would take fucking 2017 era pregnant Elsa hospital operation sim ads over the puzzle cocktease.

[our-queer-experience]

i am a queer. womanish thing. in a blue collar field (im a lube tech!!!! yay first step!!!!!!) but i have an issue called "these cishet and mostly white men like to make jokes that put down queer and trans people and also neurodivergent people and nonwhite people and sometimes women" and it makes me SO UNCOMFY but like. i cant do anything about it. this is such an integral part of the blue collar experience. i dont wanna make myself a target by voicing my concerns and im not gonna actually be able to do anything. but my primary concern is that ive fallen to the shitty jokes myself. its a defense mechanism. its masking. im trying to protect myself and fit it so i spit out things that i think everyone else would find funny and then im filled with such revulsion at myself that im finding hard to deal with. just all of this is hard to deal with.

the good news is that nobody is actively discriminating against me and im making 16 dollars an hour!!!! plus flag pay (commissions)

i get that. its the question of how far you can push and how to not get used to it without getting so upset every time those jokes are made… its hard. but its getting better, and it sounds like things are otherwise going well :)

[sweetpumpkinmouse]

A quick emotional rant on how the fandom treats V and Uzi.

Warning: Pure anger (from me), ableism, sexism and sexist language, stupidity, body-shaming (maybe idk), victim-blaming, and bullying.

Sometimes the way y’all treat V and Uzi is just…yikes.

Like…can you go a few minutes without being ableist or victim blame-y towards Uzi? Or being weird about V’s body type or treat like her only value is being N’s sexy side piece?

The funny thing is that they have a common theme: ✨misogyny✨.

“Uzi is such a pick-me omg! Why is she so weird and annoying? How dare she have emotions that aren’t just being cool or edgy! How dare she be vulnerable and steal away V’s man! She isn’t even hot! Why is she so angry? Why can’t she just be grateful for her father? Why did she have to kill her classmates? That whiny hoe! No, I’m not going to acknowledge her being emotionally neglected and bullied by her classmates, she should just be a good little girl and suck it up! No, I’m not being ableist, I’m just saying she’s too unstable to be in a relationship because…she’s that unstable! Yes, I know a lot of Uzi fans/defenders are autistic/bpd/mentally ill/neurodivergent/been abused or neglected/have trauma/been bullied, but that just proves how mentally unstable they are!”

“V has no character, omg! She’s just there for fan service! No, sapphics do not exist, ignore them! If not for her EXISTENCE, people wouldn’t even be watching the show! No, I’m not going to acknowledge her growth and development, she should’ve worn PANTS! You stupid pervert! If not for Uzi, then she would’ve just been N’s side-chick, because that’s how useless she is! No, I’m not going to acknowledge their relationship and appreciate the tragedy of it, she has no depth! No, I’m not going to acknowledge her trauma, she should just get over it! The narrative really need to stop pretending that V has any depth, omg. Her only purpose is to be eye-candy! Her sacrifice means nothing to the plot, stop getting so defensive!”

Like…dear god! Give the girls a break!

I’m sorry, but women are more than just their bodies and mentally ill people deserve happiness!

“But SALEM! Haven’t you been critical towards ENVY—“

This isn’t about Envy. Hell, not even about Nuzi. No where in this post have I said much about Envy or Nuzi at all.

Am I critical about certain things? Yes! I’m critical with a lot of things I like. I don’t believe everything is 100% perfect, but still am able to enjoy things.

Sadly, some of the shitty “critiques” are often ship-related.

“You created strawmen—“

I’VE WITNESSED SOME OF THE MOST STUPIDEST, SOMETIMES EVEN DOWNRIGHT SEXIST AND ABLEIST COMMENTARY I HAVE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF BEING IMPLEMENTED IN MY BRAIN! BOTH CHARACTERS HAVE DELT WITH BOTH FROM THIS FANDOM! I’M SO SICK OF IT!

I DON’T CARE OF IT’S SIMPLIFYING IT! IT IS THAT FUCKING DUMB!

I like V. I LOVE Uzi. And those two deserve so much better treatment from the fandom! I’m so sorry about this emotional rant. I needed to get it off my chest. Feel free to give your perspective and criticism.