#in a lot of ways ive come to terms w it

[trickinabucket]

It’s actually a massive part of my kin things, just. Not feeling like “a person”, just looking out at humanity. Watching.

[felassan]

What kind of spirit do you think Felassan waz?

Swag

[skitskatdacat63]

Fernando and Fisi pictures that I like and enjoy a normal amount (pt. 1: 2005)

[marsixm]

u know that whole "theres a whole world out there we're unaware of" thing that usually gets applied to like, unheard of network tv shows, the zynternet, suburban family trends, etc? thats how i feel when i hear about like, in person events or whatever via some random reel, like showing some massive hyper specific event with like hundreds of people doing some activity or at some place w zero context or explanation, seemingly in america just like me, that i have never seen or heard of in my life. like where did this come from? was this always a thing? is this a thing that only popped up in the last 3 years like a lot of weird specific trends? im not judging im just confused 😭

[phagodyke]

was gonna say smth else but this turned into a vent sorry everyone just ignore. typical weekend post on this blog u know how it is here we go👍

[bunnyboy-juice]

blah blah blah blah blah

[beeapocalypse]

trying to craft a funger oc like aughhhh i can see him i can picture him in my head right now [image of the most off putting little man possible]

[happistar]

I love being in the middle of like 5 different sherlock adaptions because sometimes a case is new to me and sometimes I have Future Sight but Not Quite because I usually know how its done in one adaption but not the original story, so I have to make guesses at what parts are actually kept from the original in whatever adapted case I encounter. Or, I get to the original story and have 3 different versions of the story I've already seen so I get to guess what elements are true or Not.

[maraeffect]

i finally let the cat out of the bag on my facebook (which only keep alive for family members tbh) that i'm going to die in the next few years. and GODDDDDD it's been such a fucking relief 😭😭😮‍💨😮‍💨❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 everyone got the same memo, i didn't have to re-explain myself a thousand times; and i've been getting beautiful messages of support from people i haven't heard from in a VERY long time 🥺 i don't think any of them even knew i had my leg amputated like 1.5 years ago. or that i've been getting treatment in new york for LOADS of new nodules/tumors. carrying that weight by myself was so heavy. i'm so fucking glad i finally just let it out 😮‍💨❤️‍🩹

[kissingarthurclaus]

OMG HI! i must have been living under a rock when you came out as lesbian bc i had no idea until a few seconds ago! and i’ve been ur moot for 4 years 😭😭😭 my title has been revokeddddd *dramatic*

MARNIEEEE 💖💖 no you're totally ok because tbh...I didn't officially come out online 😅

I came out to close friends and ofc my partner, but I just wasn't sure how to announce it, if it was necessary to. And tbh was a little worried bcs I ship primarily with guys and I didn't wanna get backlash for it

But I've done a lot of thinking about myself in the last few months and I'm pretty sure now that I am a lesbian and I'm proud of it!

[curiosityjams]

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[volant-endeavor]

"Last time I saw ÿou, you said you would feed me prices of my flayed skin"

Ok, so ed is traumatized by threats of autocannibalism from his previous captain. [Aka boss] And when he is spiraling in self destruction, he does that exact thing to his close friend (+whipping boy?)

In his death images, the electrical activity happening as the body dies, his big radical shift in perspective is to place his behavior in the identity of his former abuser. And continue his own identity, "ed" in contrast, and at the whims of that person.

Now, the captain continues his life forward. Nourishes his body. Does what he has to do. And even, in this moment, treats him with respect! Dignity, even.

But underlying, there is a threat. Ed is afraid.

I think Ed has sought power to escape the abuses of hierarchy, and used those violences himself to get there. To build an image.

This made him lose himself, in a lot of ways. It's extreme masking trauma. It's made him feel so trapped that he has become suicidal, long before canon.

Ed realizes that to continue to be a pirate, he would rather himself be dead.

...or he can retire?

[unrelaxing]

Back on Liam Payne's death, but not in the mourning way.

I've been thinking about how Liam's death has coloured people's perception of the potentially terrible things he's done in life, and comparing it to another, similar situation - Caroline Flack's suicide.

Caroline Flack died four years ago after a highly publicised alleged domestic violence incident, wherein she hit her partner with a phone while he was asleep. While this news was making the rounds, her past relationship with seventeen year old Harry Styles when she was thirty-one was also being brought up. The upcoming trial and the media circus proved too much for a Caroline who had already been struggling mentally, and she killed herself.

In comparison, we have Liam Payne, who was being accused of abuse by his ex-fiance, and for taking advantage of fans. His ex-fiance's age - 18 when they started dating - also became the subject of scrutiny. Possibly due to these events and other factors, Liam was dropped by both his label and PR before his death.

When Caroline died, I didn't preface any expression of regret about her passing with caveats about what kind of person she might have been when she was alive. I don't remember where my mind was at the time. Whether her boyfriend also mourning her had me believing that she didn't actually hit him, and it was all a smear campaign. Did I put aside my discomfort about their age difference because Harry and his family obviously still held affection for her? Did her womanhood blind me to things that I never would have overlooked had she been a man?

All I know is that faced with such a similar situation four years later, I can't help but realise how different my reaction is. As a result, I've been confronted with the double standards of my own philosophy towards the death of a more-than-imperfect individual.

Do I believe in fully mourning a person when they pass, without acknowledgement of any terrible things they might have done? Or do I acknowledge the hurt those people have caused?

It's a difficult question to answer because I can't imagine myself doing so at a person's funeral. If I knew a man who had cheated on his wife, I wouldn't bring it up at his funeral. If I knew a man who had abused children, I would just not be at his funeral, and would therefore never feel the need to think about whether to say anything at all.

When it comes to celebrities or people who have had a huge influence on your life who you later find out were not good people... a part of me feels like maybe it was a mistake to write anything about Liam's passing - there are so many celebrity deaths I don't acknowledge - why did I have to say anything about Liam's death just because I was a One Direction fan once upon a time?

I do know that I feel a growing discomfort as the mourning crescendos, and the tentative posts about his death that still acknowledged his flaws give way to posts that are angry at anyone who would even dare consider him as less than a perfect angel destroyed by the industry.

[yarrowleef]

and per this news apparently,, Ivypool getting a whole ass super edition that takes place during the end of Starless Clan?? whats so important about her in particular in this arcs storyline otherwise??

im telling y'all squilf and brambles are so incredibly not long for this world

i suppose im a little more inclined to think Squirrel might not get killed immediately if Ivypool (judging by the SE title?) doesnt have a -star name by book 6. but girl still aint making it out of this arc alive

Thunder preview spoilers

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idk man. idk. I'm still feeling Squilf is gonna bite it before becoming leader, tbh now i'm thinking she and Bramble might bite it together

feels like they are stalling for something to happen. feels like if the plan was for her to smoothly become leader she would have just. done it at the end of last book.

and that the next books preview still didn't mention it, like why are they being so cagey about this if she just becomes leader exactly like they planned, no problems? there's gotta be a Problem(tm) of SOME kind. maybe the Problem won't be dying, but dying would be easy and dramatic

Also, the fact that they had her make ivypool deputy before leaving, instead of waiting to announce it in an official normal ceremony after coming back?? it would make more sense to wait until she was sure she even could promote a deputy. has a future leader ever made their deputy announcement before getting their leader name?? (i honestly don't remember)

feels weird.

I get that there's all this set up for squilf being a conflict-causer with shadowclan, but it's not like they need squilf specifically to do that, i'm sure other cats can want to fight shadowclan. if thunderclan also suddenly has leader issues they could collectively start getting extra insecure about it. maybe they'd all want to fight shadowclan's idea even more to compensate

[hughiecampbelle]

The Boys Preference: Reacting To Your Symbiote

Requested: HEYY ive been eating UPP your head-canons for rhe boys, i would like to request one on how they would react w/ a reader that has a symbiote (venom basically) except it’s not like butcher’s case, but spouted from comp v when they were injected at a young age :D - anon

A/N: This idea is cool my love!!!! I hope you like it!! I did base it off clips from Venom/the Wikipedia just bc it's been ages since I saw the movie lol so apologies if anything is wrong!!! Feedback is always appreciated 💜

Requests are open! 🔮

Butcher thinks your symbiote is both gross and a great thing to have on the team. You didn't tell anyone about them, fearing you'd hear the same responses you'd always heard growing up. He interrogates you about your powers. You promise you would never hurt anyone, that it's pretty bad in terms of looks, but that you have everything under control. That's not good enough for him. He wants you to show him. After more yelling and assumptions, you snap. It's only your arms that you allow to be taken over, but it's enough to leave him feeling sick. Afterwards you're pretty quiet, avoiding him as well as you can. The look on his face was exactly what you were trying to avoid. Eventually he grows a little more used to them and even apologized, though it's a poor one at best. When he really sees you in action he's left speechless. The team needs you, both of you. You're strong, and powerful, and scary in the best way possible.

Hughie was pretty freaked out the first time you showed him. You begged him to run, to save himself, but mostly you wanted him gone so he wouldn't have to see. When he didn't, you had no other choice. Your symbiote took over, giving you just enough control to apologize before, quite literally, annihilating your attackers. He couldn't believe what he was witnessing. He knew you were a Supe, you were pretty upfront about that, but you'd never gone into detail about what you could actually do. He understood why. Your symbiote was the thing of nightmares. It was malleable, and throbbing, and it could be as large as it wanted. It swallowed you whole, making itself a set of knife-sharp teeth. It smiled at him, telling him he was safe, which would have been endearing had it not been you standing in its place moments before. He has a lot of questions, all of them you're more than willing to answer. He deserves to know, especially coming face to face with them. You're an open book, the both of you are.

Annie was pissed. You never told her you were a Supe in the first place. You couldn't tell her. She was everything good about Supes and you feared you were everything bad. You were afraid of her judgement. You had enough of that from M.M. You made sure no one told her, not until you thought she was ready. And then she watched you save Hughie. She felt like an idiot, watching them take over your body, in awe and horror. She felt lied to. Technically, you think but dare not say, it wasn't lying because she never asked you, she just assumed you were human. You apologize anyways, knowing it wasn't right. You show her your symbiote bit by bit, introducing them slowly, telling her as much as you think she can handle at a time. You've been told, if you wanted, you'd be a perfect villain, you'd fit right in with Homelander. You didn't want her to come to the same conclusion. Annie could come to rash decisions at times. You figured you and your symbiote were no exceptions.

M.M isn't the biggest fan. It's nothing personal. Being a Supe is enough not to make him like you. On top of that you've got this thing inside of you that has a mind of its own. It could be capable of anything and you'd have very little control over it. You know this. You've been dealing with it since you were a kid. You and your symbiote grew up together. You've reached a level of mutual understanding and maturity that they aren't just going to start running around and rob banks or hurt people. That's not who either of you are. Still, he can't shake the feeling, the worry, that they could turn on your team at any moment. Your symbiote knows M.M. doesn't like them and, much like a dog, wants to give him extra attention because of it. You've had long talks about what not to do around him, keeping them in check so that you can gain just an inch more of trust. Anything helps to show him that you're not a monster.

Frenchie is probably the most comfortable around your symbiote out of all The Boys. He has a lot of questions for the both of you, especially about your childhood. For many years you thought you were a monster. Your family was expecting powers that could save people, that would get you into The Seven. Instead there was this thing that took over your body, this creature that could control their child. They thought it was gross, unsightly, and forbid you from letting them out. Of course you didn't listen. When you fell off your bike and skinned your knee, they fixed it. When you couldn't reach something, they helped you. They weren't all bad, they just weren't willing to learn that. Still, there was a lot of shame and even now, you struggle to open up about them. There's absolutely no judgement from Frenchie. He's fascinated. Awestruck. He tells you constantly how cool and powerful he thinks you both are. He doesn't want you to think of yourself as some kind of monster or abomination. Ever.

Kimiko watched your symbiote take over the first time you were really hurt. Homelander pushed you off the roof and you fell, breaking your bones, gasping for air, but magically alive. If she could have, she would have screamed. Your symbiote, as gently as it could, wrapped itself around your body, resetting your bones, putting your insides back together. It was excruciating. It only takes a few minutes before you're completely healed. She watches in awe, eyes wide, unsure of what the hell just happened, but eternally grateful you were okay. She stands you up, unsure of what to say. That night, you tell her everything. She's the first to really appreciate them. They're not the most attractive and have a wicked attitude, but they care about you. They saved you. Anyone who loves you that much is good in her books. She gives them names, asking how Kevin is or if Susan might be able to help her with something. It always makes you smile, knowing she isn't afraid of them or thinks of you any differently.

Bonus! Homelander thinks your symbiote is disgusting and weird. He refused to have you be a part of The Seven, but without any other candidates, he eventually gave in. You do a lot of weird things that truly make him uncomfortable. Arguing with your symbiote is a big one. Only you can hear them when they're inside, so it just looks like you're talking to yourself all the time. He hates when you're "saving" someone and they come out, but only partially, like a hand or leg. Something about that, you and them together, makes him queasy. When it's one or the other, that's a little better. When he gets uncomfortable he gets angry, which is bad news for you. Like The Deep, you've become a scapegoat for Homelander. If anything goes wrong, it's your fault. Your symbiote doesn't like him and, as hard as you try to keep them in check, they make it known.

[phagodyke]

see I get its abt repression and letting that bury u alive but theres still time it doesnt have to be like this etc !! and it does that powerfully. but I've just. never been repressed or closeted in that specific kind of sense. dysphoria has never manifested like that for me... I kind of feel like social pressures esp gender related ones didn't exert the same force on me growing up that they did on a lot of ppl I know (and still don't now) bc I never fully understood them or was excluded for various reasons. but man. fucking rough for ppl who did/do still feel that way 💔