#impractical magic au

[thatmexisaurusrex]

WinterFalcon Bingo Round Two 2022-2023 Masterpost

Here is my masterpost for my fills for the WinterFalcon Bingo Round 2 2022-2023 hosted by @winterfalconevents. I have no clue how I did so many yet didn't make a bingo 😂 My fills are:

Midnight Lover (E, 3.7K, Vampire AU) - Sam Wilson has a lover. Someone he only sees at night. Sam knows can't possibly last. But Sam keeps seeing Bucky Barnes, nonetheless.

Before You Go (M, 1.6K, There Was Only One Bed) - On a dark and stormy night while Sam's house sitting Sarah's place in Delacroix, he hears a knock at the door...

my mind has changed my body’s frame (but, god, I like it) (E, 9.1K, Free Space) - Sam Wilson finds his soulmate in a hole-in-the-wall bar. Things escalate from there.

Impractical Magic (M, 10.7K, Spell Gone Wrong) - Sam's family is beloved by their town, charmed with all sorts of gifts. However, like everyone in his family, all of Sam's lovers are cursed with bad luck.

A Feast of a Man (M, 4.2K, Deal with the Devil) - Sam Wilson is an incubus. He's also asexual. It's... a little complicated, but not as complicated as you'd think. It gets a little more complicated when he meets Sarah's new neighbor, Bucky Barnes.

come along now (run away) (M, 10.7K, Growth) - When Sam Wilson was twelve years old, Sam met Bucky while Bucky was looking for a friend in the woods. Ever since then, he's been meeting the mysterious boy every Halloween night.

Five Times Bucky Got Dirty... ...And the One Time Bucky Got Sam Dirty (M, E, 6K, Don't You Dare, Didn't Know They Were Dating) - Five times Bucky gets dirty around Sam. The one time Bucky got Sam dirty.

Playing with Fire (M, 17.5K, Post-Blip, Gay Chicken, Fake Marriage) - A year after events of The Falcon Captain America and the Winter Soldier, Sam and Bucky go on an undercover mission and end up playing gay chicken while pretending to be a married couple.

For the Holidays (M, 25.6K, Blind Date, Wrong Number, Bad Pickup Lines) - After Sam is dumped by his girlfriend, Bucky suggests he pretends to be Sam's boyfriend while Sam's visiting his family for the holidays.

You'll Never Be My Maybe + You're My Always (M, E, 19.4K, Secret Relationship, First Time) - Is Sam Wilson dating Bucky Barnes?

[bloomeng]

Shout out to the person who noticed Steph was the only one in heels and said Dick would totally wear heels. You didn’t know it but you were ahead of your time (it was always my plan to put discowing in heels).

Steph originally wasn’t going to get heels but then I got the idea to add the wings and I fell in love but I think the in universe reason is she wanted them for the drama and she was extrapolating design elements from Batgirl’s og outfit and Batwoman. I was going for like a gothic princess sort of vibe which turned out a bit more Fischl from gi than I intended, but I think that actually suits the vibe pretty well.

Another shoe detail: Jason’s shoes are meant to be slight platforms to match his desire to be tall and imposing.

This is a side tangent but I want to talk about it. For this au I’ve been trying to strike a balance between feminine and “would this character actually wear this?” Now the answer is mostly no. The outfits by nature are impractical as hell bc that’s how magical girl media is, so the question I’ve been asking is more “would this character feel comfortable in this outfit?” I want each look to be equally feminine which means I’m hyper conscious of not making the women more feminine than the men. Magical girl designs are hyper fem by default so my goal is to basically make everyone relatively the same amount of fem.

However, I’m also trying to take into account personality. This is where I might lose some people but hell it’s my au. So why are Jason and Cass the only ones so far with real skirts? This is totally my headcanon but I think they’re the only ones who would benefit from skirts:

Dick would be fine with wearing a skirt but I think he’s ultimately neutral about it. He would totally do it though if someone asked and would be fully aware of how nice he looked.

I don’t know if I’d say Tim would like wearing skirts so much as he doesn’t care. He’s more concerned with practicality.

Steph doesn’t have any issues with skirts but I think as a part of her uniform she would feel stifled. As as I said previously I think part of her look is based on Bats she would’ve looked up to but also partly it was secret wish fulfillment for that little girl who would’ve loved to look like a kickass mary sue demon princess from a y/a novel.

Duke in my opinion wouldn’t see the appeal. I think he’d be similar to Dick but just a little more shy about wearing one. I gave him a little ruffle though bc I thought it was cute.

Babs is fine with skirts but tends to prefer pants.

Cass is a bit different because I think wearing something frivolous is so novel to her. I wanted her outfit to be a blend of her canon design and her appreciation for dance. I tried to contrast her more practical elements (like her pants and armor) with the soft things I think she would enjoy (like a flowy skirt.) I still have ambition to go back and design a Black Bat outfit for her but I haven’t quite figured out the direction I want to take with it.

Jason on the other hand— this also very much in hc territory— I think didn’t know how much he would enjoy a skirt until he got to wear one. Stepping away from the universe for a sec; Jason is the most masculine design fundamentally which means that in order to match the vibe I would have to make him the furthest from his canon design. I’m really not trying to make a statement or subvert things by putting men in skirts bc it’s supposed to a silly au with aesthetically pleasing designs. I like feminine things and it shows in my work however I don’t see clothing as naturally gendered. That’s my little context psa back to my point. I think Jason is the most likely to wear a skirt and actually feel empowered by it. At first I think he was embarrassed by it but the outfits choose you so he just went with it out of necessity. And through that he found he really thrived in the juxtaposition between his intentional imposing figure and this unashamed femininity. He’s a drama kid at heart and fr what’s more dramatic than an ill-advised fit that serves. The skirt to him feels like a costume that helps give him the confidence to be Red Hood or ig… Red Bow. (Which is sorta how I think of the red helmet in canon but I also do believe that Jason and Cass would have the most fun wearing a skirt.)

I haven’t decided if Bruce will get a skirt or not but if he does just know that my reasoning is that his artifact was humbling him. Like you take yourself too seriously calm down with the brooding. He would use the skirt as a way to conceal more weapons.

(I think Kon would love wearing skirts but in this au because he built his own outfit I think he was trying to seem impressive and edgy and distinguish himself from Clark. I also think, despite enjoying skirts, he would have to work up the courage to wear them in public and never as Superboy because he would be too conscious of his image.)

Anyway I don’t claim to always succeed with my intentions coming through in my work but this is what is running through my head.

[fireandspiceland]

Summing up some spicy cardverse thoughts from a conversation with Art @coralcatsea and ArtTea @artea-artie because they are too lovely to keep them hidden <3

♠️💚♠️💙♠️💚♠️💙♠️💚♠️💙♠️💚♠️💙♠️

Cardverse au where Queen Arthur is a powerful mage, but what no one (not even the Queen) knows is that Alfred has 1 (one) magical ability and it is reading the thoughts people have about him which contain strong emotions. Arthur’s mind never shuts up, and while Alfred does get quite a kick out of knowing this Queen is thinking and fantasising about him almost 24/7, he sometimes finds himself in rather.. impractical situations. 🤭

As ArTea suggested it's particularly fun to consider this in an enemies to lovers setting, where they loathe each other at first - the royal born prince who became king and the queen who stems from peasantry and has yet to make peace with his new role? - but slowly Arthur's feelings towards Alfred turn from fantasies about violently breaking their divinely chosen bond to... still violent fantasies, but now he is sexually torturing Alfred in his mind. Those once malicious thoughts that craved nothing but the worst for the other, turning into not-so-innocent fantasies of a tear-stained Alfred calling out Arthur's name.

Alfred wonders why he hasn’t been hearing any malicious thoughts from Arthur in a long while (which would be at a time they where they finally start to get along) just for him to suddenly get hit with this- What does he do with that information? It's the first time he encountered such a malicious thought about him. 😆

Queen Arthur and King Alfred sitting next to each other at some official event in the throne room, suddenly there’s thoughts of him being made to undress and kneel before his Queen with tears of shame streaming down his face, broadcasted directly into Alfred’s mind. Needless to say, he’s unable to leave the event so he’s forced to sit there and act like he’s not feeling like melting into a puddle. Through the event Alfred is unbelievably fidgety, enough that it even gains Arthur’s attention - who of couse asks Alfred about his strange behavious. He tries to brush it off, but does it in a manner Arthur finds adorable - blushing and stuttering - which only worsens the fantasy as it inspires the imagination within Arthur. 🔥

Arthur sits up a little straighter and with his legs slightly spread while thinking about Alfred sucking him off there on the throne. Meanwhile Alfred is slouching in his seat, hoping to disappear while he keeps biting and licking his lips and glancing at Arthur’s groin. Arthur catches of course and thinks Alfred is having similar thoughts, but he doesn’t know Alfred knows what he’s fantasising about and it all just continues to get worse.

As Art put it so well: The cycle just continues. Self-fulfilling prophecy. And then Arthur catches him later and tries to call Alfred out for his behaviour (bonus kabedon possible) and Alfred is like, "But YOU-!" but he can't finish that, because it's supposed to be a secret that he heard and saw Arthur's fantasies before his own inner eye.

And sometimes when Arthur is around Alfred, he notices him getting hard for "no reason" and assumes Alfred just really likes and has a lot of dirty thoughts about HIM. When really it's ARTHUR'S dirty thoughts that keep causing it. ❤️

[chaos-has-theories]

Character concepts for the Mad Scientist/Girl Genius AU I'm working on for AU Roulette 2024

More description and story concept under cut.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng: GIRL GENIUS

a Spark from the city of Paris. While she doesn't have a particularly impressive lineage, her talents are impressive.

Her focus is on textile based inventions, with her breakthrough project having included a small viscose spinning device.

She also builds little clockwork ladybugs.

After she managed to piss off every single noble family in Paris, she essentially went into exile. Since then she's been travelling and doing assorted heroics all over Europa.

She's got her shirt and waistcoat because everybody in GG wears them. No skirt, because it would impractical in her field of work; long jacket tails because a) I like them and b) Ladybug wings :D

She's also supposed to have a Ladybug locket and her little silk gun, but. Forgor

Before she leaves Paris, her outfits are more like Circus Era and Classic Agatha.

Nino Lahiffe: A normal guy with a normal life

No, really.

Well, he used to be, okay?

Former classmate and childhood friend of Marinette's

Marinette, Adrien and him were essentially inseperable after Marinette's breakthrough.

Except no, they weren't, because Adrien is still in Paris while Nino followed Marinette into exile.

People tend to assume that he's either Marinette's minion or her construct or both. She doesn't consider him a minion; and while he's taken his share of damage, he has never died once.

(He is very proud of that.)

The reason why he doesn't break his neck once a week is that Marinette is very good at her job. His outer shirt with the hood works as like, exoskeleton, hardhat and airbag in one.

His outfit and general style are inspired by Lars, specifically here.

Alya, Last Princess of the Lost City of Cesaire

what it says on the tin.

Descended from one of the last God-Queens

in the face of all that, only a rather minor spark.

Also, her science kind of... looks like magic to most europeans.

and anyway she doesn't want to be a scientist!!! she wants to be a warrior

her mother agreed that she could go on a trip and just come home and learn princessing once she's seen everything she wanted to see

THERE IS ALWAYS MORE TO SEE

joined the Miracle Squad about a year ago, because a) they're fun and b) Nino is very cute even if he can't flirt to save his life (and it has come up)

Based on both Zeetha (who gave her the bare biceps) and Violetta (who gave her the boots), but the outfit really is mostly Rena Rouge

Adrien Agreste, son of the famous Spark and heir to the House de Vanily

???

went to school with Marinette and Nino for a while

in recent years, has only been seen in public during Important Events

perfect dutiful son

like, he does everything his father tells him to!

definitely human though.

100% perfectly completely human

Marinette definitely never had to resurrect him either

Never seen in anything less than a fully buttoned shirt, long sleeves, and full slacks.

I have a design for him based on Classic Gil, but this is fully grieving madboy Gil (+ skirt + happiness + catboy :3)

All of these pictures are sketched over the basic character images for ML and I didn't really feel like shading but... maybe one day

[coinlockerrbaby]

Guys Verlaine if he wasn't a loser and also was a magical girl from hit animanga series Madoka Magica 🙀🙀 (and also a gal :3)

get ready 4 my yapping (and better quality close-ups) below!!!!

Okay so in this AU them and Rimbaud r both 19!!!

Verlaine's wish was to bring Chuuya back after he went missing; Chuuya disappeared at 5 and was gone for two years before Kyuubey showed up.

In this Chuuya's 14 and came back @ 7 so Verlaine would've made their contract at 12!!! (They've been a magical girl 4 a hot minute)

They still keep a lot of the whole "I'm not human" edginess but this time it's over being a magical girl (bro did NOT react well to finding out abt the soul gem thing). Them nd Rimbaud have a bit of a better relationship than canon cuz Rimbaud's also a magical girl so Verlaine actually feels understood in this universe.

Story-wise they both were doin pretty good until an amount of circumstances led to them having to kill Walpurgisnacht on their own. While they did succeed, they both had completely used up all their magic and were gonna become witches </3

Rimbaud pulls a Madoka and sacrifices himself with their only grief seed :( Verlaine's forced to kill Rimbaud (or the witch that used 2 be Rimbaud el oh el) and it fucks him up a little :3

Verlaine's super devastated cuz bro lost the only person who understood them and they essentially gave up on living; so they decide to just start killing witches (and quite a few magical girls!!!!). It doesn't take long for them to transform into their own witch and get killed (probably by Chuuya nd Dazai) </3

OK DESIGN DETAILS!!!

Their weapon is a sniper rifle, it's magical so they can summon it but only one at a time so not like Mami's many revolvers!! It can shoot lil mini black holes and it's pretty fancy :3

Also close-up of the Soul Gem this took like 4 tries to look okay </3

Their outfit's pretty similar, I gave them like a huge coat that they don't rlly wear cuz it'd be so impractical in battles </3 also the design on their gloves and tights are supposed to mimic brutalisation :3

(also if u look real close they have heterochromia yippee!!!)

MY FAV PART THE WITCH FORM

The runes (hopefully) spell out Guivre cuz that's the name of Verlaine's witch form :3

I wanted to reference what's described in Stormbringer so the "tail" nd "head" are inspired by that tomfoolery!! It's also supposed to mimic a dragon with butterfly wings instead of normal wings (idk why i drew butterfly wings they're just fun ig) and it also has horns :3

The lil halo thing in the back's supposed to look divine in a way????? also it just looks cool

meow

Im gonna draw Rimbaud in the future but 4 now I'm done yapping thanks 4 reading this :3

ALSO this started like 2 years ago when Pinterest did this!!!

and then my wife drew the first iteration of magical girl verlaine...

:3

[thecryptidgrey]

As an avid lover of his Dark Materials I have yet to see a BG3 daemons concept and that is a Crime. So here are some Thoughts below the cut :)

(Also something something about the representation of religion in HDM and how it correlates to BG3's depictions of faith and trauma. I have the Idea but I am too tired to do much with it; may return to the thought later.)

Shadowheart- a borzoi. Elegant, spooky looking, dramatic. Borzoi don't make much vocal noise but are very playful- instincts surpressed by Sharrens that thrive with the party (see that very cute night orchid scene specifically). Generally very sweet, loyal animals, like SH when you get to know her. Plus they look amazing.

(Act 3 spoilers- I also appreciate that she'll match it when she dyes her hair. Seems suitable dramatic for her.) Anyways, I also really like borzois and think it's be funny af to see in them trotting around in game like the weird willow tree ghost things they are.

Lae'zel- Githyanki don't have daemons; she finds them baffling. Very impractical to carry one's soul on the exterior, although perhaps an efficient companion in combat to have someone you share instincts with. After much discussion by the others she decides for them if she did have one it would be a red dragon. Nobody argues with that.

(She does decide she'd have to prove herself worthy of such a beast first, and if she trusts Tav admits that maybe she'd like if Vlaakith could give her a daemon bond with her future dragon. Would she get a dragon if she became Vlaakith's chosen? Idk, she would now.)

Karlach- Tieflings also don't have daemons. She wants one wholeheartedly. The party finds her a magic ring that allows her to summon a familiar- she gets a direwolf puppy as enthusiastic and adoring as she is :)

Said ring is obtained somewhere in the Shadowlands after she gets the cooldown upgrade so she can hug it as soon as she has it. Also it grows up absolutely massive. Its paws are the size of its head when it's a puppy. All the better for cuddling with!

Gale- Tara. Wizards, sorcerers, etc, tend to have magical creatures as familiars. This AU he had Tara since the beginning. He still summoned all the other weird shit he did as a kid, just with Tara's help. She is his voice of reason and holder of the braincells; he gets to keep one and it's all about Mystra. She's protecting the rest from its corruption. He gets them back when the party convinces him to tell Mystra to go fuck herself.

(I do chew upon the trans Gale headcanon sometimes. If anyone wishes to muse with me on how daemons, which are typically of the opposite sex to their human, would be incorporated into that, please do.) Edit- pls see comments for very illuminating interpretations of daemons and gender!! Very cool stuff!

Wyll- lanner falcon. Medium sized yet formidable bird of prey, the head of which was often depicted on Egyptian gods like Ra and Horus. Beautiful, noble and nimble creatures (good for a dexterity based build, which I focused on for him alongside charisma).

Mizora's pact significantly lengthened their tether; her devil-form punishment broke it and weakened their bond significantly, much to their distress- they hate to be out of vision of one another as a result. Halsin, Jaheira and especially my Tav Cerewyn helped him adapt to and understand the new tether.

Druids and their daemons are based on the His Dark Materials witches, who have significantly lengthened bonds. Druid bonds are just as strong in markedly different ways; each is more independent and their personalities more distinct. I will definitley expand more on this; I adore Wyll and really want to do his character justice. He's the knight in shining armour but he also made a deal with a devil to be said knight, so, y'know. His daemon should really reflect that complexity.

Astarion- luna moth (changed when he turned- he can't remember what she was before.)

Beautiful in a fragile, showy way. Short-lived. Desperate for the light. A silkmoth; silk for embroidery. He resents her for being such a reflection of the self he tries so desperately to hide yet is fiercely protective of her, so beautiful and soft and hopeful- moths exist to seek light, craving it like he longed for a knight in shining armour, like he yearns for the sun.

Cazador liked to pin her wings.

(I love my sad wet cat very much and so as payback for hurting my soul he is subjected to the tragedy that is my attempting to be poetic :) )

Halsin- bear. Druid daemons reflect their favoured Wild shapes. Strong, steady, reliable, protective. Optimal shape for snuggles, very nice and warm, overall :) vibes to look at and be around. (Bear is not present for That Scene. That Scene and daemons are not up for discussion, you degenerates. Thank you <3)

Jaheira- Eurasian lynx. Struggled a bit on this one- didn't think any of the wild shapes suited her as a daemon- so looked up the national animal of Romania (supposedly Jaheira's accent?) for potential inspiration. Got the lynx, which seems perfect. Medium sized, elegant, very dignifed and deadly hunters who inhabit forests. Notably very quiet and hard to track. Endangered, which resonated with me because of Jaheira's status as one of the last of the Old Guard, so to speak. Nocturnal, which I like because we meet Jaheira in the shadow-cursed lands. Ambush predator, which just goes with my Gloom Stalker build for her. Overall seems perfect for the legendary druid.

Minsc- Boo? Fuck knows man, Minsc gonna Minsc. I spent way too long thinking about Jaheira and now I don't have the energy left. If Gale can have Tara, Minsc can have Boo. I do love Minsc so I will be back to expand on him if the mood strikes me but also I think maybe I don't need to? Daemon Boo just seems Right. Will consult Minsc's backstory and update later if necessary.

Minthara- yet to recruit her so uncertain. Displacer beast seems apt, maybe? Something felinoid would really fit her tbh. Elegant and lethal, very aloof but loyal once you've got her. Input would be appreciated.

My Tav, Cerewyn, just in case ya'll are interested- a raven named Gwyn, short for something I haven't figured out how to spell yet.

Clever, calculating, very blunt and sarcastic to balance out Cere's generally stoic, quite, calm demeanour. Sharp eyed bird for a sharpshooter ranger's daemon. Cere is a beast master ranger/ druid of land multiclass; ravens are summonable both for wild companions and familiars and are a wild shape (Cere's preferred wild shape too).

A common species but not to be underestimated and generally unpredictable, which suits her. She romances Astarion and both she and the raven think he and his luna moth are the prettiest things they've ever seen. They're also very patient and perceptive of trauma due to (Extensive Backstory), so they're more than happy to take their time with earning his trust. Astarion is very appreciative of all the shiny things the raven likes to bring him, and also that it clawed one of Cazador's eyes out for daring to speak to Astarion like That.

CONC.; symbolism is fun and also painful :)

Daemon names are a work in progress; the muses gave me this then said lol nope and fucked off before I could ask them for appropriate names. Might post them with some sketches of the party and daemons together?

(I wrote this in Notes app at an ungodly hour with fuck all editing. It is incoherent, but if anything is genuinely incomprehensible, please tell me so I may at least try to fix it. Much love <3 if you made it this far you get to know I welcome suggestions for NPCs to give daemons next!)

First edit- I misspelled quiet so many times omfg

[satirn]

i am once again redesigning the Dib design for this au /ref.

i wanted him to have more of a cia fbi esque vibe in this, but still goth like siouxie and the banshees, with a touch of like precure magical girl in it, ykwim. that general vibe feels very dib to me.

it also looks more practical for battle than the other one i think, though with the bigger and longer cape and platforms it can be difficult to move around and not get caught on things. this, seeming to have practicality when its very impractical, is generally the point in my ngod au designs :3

[smallraindrops-blog]

I Know A Place (just for you and me)

Part 5

WMFTD!Y/N X Hypnos

Word count: 7.3

Warnings: Fluff, heavy angst, implied sex, death, AUs out of the wazoo, no beta.

Notes: 

I was going to hold off on posting this but with how long it's been since I posted anything I made, I decided to push this one out a little earlier. Thanks everyone for their patience and I hope y'all enjoy this!

also everyone go tell @jun-yng thanks for their big brain idea of ‘How to train your dragon’ AU, it wouldn’t exist without them. ( also look at their pretty art and pet the screen as you mutter like a feral person)

All parts can be found on the Masterlist

~

Fighting Evil by Moonlight (Magical girls au)

Hypnos wanted it to be noted in the records that she wanted nothing to do with any of this. 

Like she was going to hire a handsome lawyer who would nod with compassion as she told him everything and yell ‘objection!’. He would do it for her honor, then he would confess to falling madly in love with her the moment she stepped into his high rise office. 

She had been more happy to stay home with her clay mask and her softest pj on while she reread ‘The Surrender of Aphrodite’ for the millionth time. 

Unlike Zagreus who had seen the shiny dumb egg fall out of the night skies and went chasing after it. 

”Duck!” Zagreus yelled to the team, her dark hair fanned behind her as she twisted out of the way of the queen monster’ glimmering beam, causing her black skirt to lift up.

Hypnos landed on the damp, cold ground of the park, cursing as the disgusting mud touched her bare thighs. Her - stupid, too short, too ruffled - ruby red skirt hid nothing as she rolled to get out of the way of another beam.

Once this dumb thing was sent back to the underworld or wherever they went to, Hypnos was going to treat herself to a double cheeseburger with some fries and a good crying session in a very hot shower.

“We need to kill these things and fast!” Melinoë called out. Her swift form was a blur of orange as she swung her weapon, taking one of the freaky and smaller monsters out.  

“Like you don’t say? I thought we were going to invite them over a sleepover!” Hypnos snapped between chatting teeth. 

Hypnos took the chance to get back on her two feet, wobbly on the high heels and flipping her long curls over her shoulder. In a desperate attempt to summon her own weapon, she waved a hand in front of her chest.

Her impractical red flower brooch began glowing from its place in the middle of her giant bow but no weapons formed. Again.

Instead she coaxed her own magic forward, pale and misty. So unlike the vibrant colors of the other princesses, Hypnos thought sourly. 

A moment later, red flowers bloomed from the mist in her palm.

While everyone else got cool weapons and flashy attacks, Hypnos just had these dumb red flowers. However if she tossed enough in her foe’s face, they went down for a nap time. 

That little fact she discovered the first time in pure panic when Zagreus found that egg and a slime monster tried to eat them. 

One of the monsters rushed toward her, the eyes in the skull glowing an ugly yellow, its mouth a gaping black maw and Hypnos readied the flowers in a tight fist. 

Only to realize in horror that two more were charging from both sides.

Hypnos froze, her breath caught in her chest as she tried to work out what to do. She wasn’t a fighter- she wanted to go home- they had only been magical girls for two weeks-

Just as the monsters were about to jump her, their fangs sharp in the moonlight, Hypnos felt something heavy wrapped around her waist, yanking her up against a solid form as they leaped away from the oncoming monsters.

The monsters slammed into each other, so hard that they vanished. 

Hypnos blinked, dizzy as she realized that she was unharmed, her hands grabbing at the heavy arm around her waist. Then she saw the fluttering cloak in the breeze, matching the scarlet of her ridiculous outfit, and the golden shine of armor. 

A gleaming spear moved in front of her, another barrier of protection.

”Protect the princesses!” Her knight in shining armor roared to the other arriving knights, each one swiftfully taking out the monster far more faster than any of the princesses did.

Zagreus and Meilnoe weren’t going to be happy about the Knights coming to the rescue once again but Hypnos couldn’t find it in herself to be that upset. She slumped against the knight with a heavy sigh. 

She parted her lips to thank her knight.

Only to get dragged away and shoved into a bush. She winced in pain at the sharp jabs of the leaves.

”Hey- what is the-” Hypnos went quiet as the gloved finger pointed at her. The knight’s face was hidden by the golden helmet and shadows. But Hypnos still felt the intensity of their eyes on her.

“Stay here. I will fetch you when it is safe.” The knight growled then turned away, still muttering. “I swear you all are a butch of boneheads. Pains in my ass, all of you!” 

“Am not!” Hypnos called back, suddenly wishing that the knight didn’t save her just so they would have felt guilty when Hypnos got hurt. She huffed as she watched the knight neatly killed off the monsters.

Zagreus was yelling at one of them, silver armor with a black cloak. Melinoe was just trying to help finish off the last few with her knights in silver and orange. 

Hypnos’ knight - not that she liked calling them that but it seemed the magic wanted them all to be color coded for whatever reason- looked far too dashing in their golden armor and red cloak as they ruthlessly killed the queen monster in a single hit. 

Like a knight from a storybook that Hypnos would daydream over. 

Deciding for herself that it was more than safe, Hypnos stood with a huff and went to join her fellow princesses. 

~

It was after five minutes or so of listening to Zagreus arguing with the knights that Hypnos decided she was far too cold and hungry to stay out much longer.

Besides, it was a school night anyway. And she was done wearing these heels.

”I’m leaving.” Hypnos informed the group in a loud yawn. Not that anyone was paying attention to her anyway.

Hypnos turned on her heels and began the long walk back home. Hopefully her brothers or mom won’t notice Hypnos sneaking through her bedroom’s window, she will just act like she was asleep the whole time when they finally do see her.

A moment later, she sensed rather than hear the knight join behind her, a watchful guard - or a babysitter if she was being honest. 

“I will be fine. Shoo, go polish your armor or kill a dragon or whatever it is that knights do.” Hypnos waved a dismissive hand over her shoulders. 

“What knights do is watch over their foolish princess, especially when she tries to walk home alone in the dark.” Her knight shot back. Hypnos felt her cheeks flushed at the implication of the words but only scoffed.

She lifted her arm up, scowling at her flower brooch, and with a tap on it, her school uniform was restored in a gentle light as the brooch changed back to a dainty bracelet with a single charm of a red flower dangling from it.

Thankfully - or unfortunately depending- it returned her school bag as well, but her knight picked it up before Hypnos could, swinging it onto their shoulder. Hypnos gave them a cool glare before she began her walk again.

If her knight wanted to carry her stuff, so be it. Less work for Hypnos.

While the long sleeves of her button up and longer skirt helped a little, it wasn’t as much as she hoped. Shivering, Hypnos crossed her arms. She really needed to remember to get her beloved coat from school tomorrow.

“I swear you guys don’t know how to take care of yourself at all.” Her knight grumbled. Before she could snap back, a heavy, warm weight enveloped her form. 

The cloak. 

If Hypnos was like Zagreus, so desperate to prove herself, Hypnos might have protested but she wasn’t. Hypnos sighed deeply in relief, wrapping it around tightly and buried her face in it to get warm. There was a faint scent to it, almost like a campfire maybe. 

Whenever it was, it smelled good.

For a long moment, they walked side by side in silence. Even with the armor, the knight moved with a quiet, easy grace that Hypnos was envious of. 

“Thank you.” Hypnos said finally, peeking up from her lashes. Gosh, but the knight might be one of the tallest people she ever met. Beside Asterius.

If the voice was deeper, more masculine, it could be Asterius… Hypnos felt her heart flutter with hope.

“Just be more careful next time.” Her knight grumbled. Their voice was low, more like warm silk but most certainly not Asterius.

Hypnos nodded, her hopes dashed but she was surprised to find that she wasn’t that upset. Asterius and his ‘friend’ had something going on even if Hypnos was the only one to notice. “I'm just not made for fighting. I don’t even get a weapon.” 

“You are the reincarnation of a sleep deity or something right? Why would you be near a battlefield anyway?” The knight asked. From the way their tone sounded, it seemed like that question had been on their mind for a while.

Hypnos shrugged, her tone dry. “Seems wrong to get some type of power and not help out my fellow princesses. Zagreus also wouldn’t leave me alone. And I don't want to upset whatever god tossed that egg our way.”

Another silence fell between them. The trees rustled, losing more of the bold leaves. 

“You know what?” Hypnos said suddenly. “I wouldn’t mind all this- the fighting, the late nights -that uniform- you saw how short that skirt is right? Especially with those heels. Anyone could see my panties.”

At that the knight made a strangled noise, like they were in great deal of pain but Hypnos decided it must be their version of laughing in agreement. 

Hypnos sighed, waving her hand around, scowling at the sparkling charm. “I wouldn’t mind if I was actually useful. All I can do is create those dumb red flowers- ow!“

She stopped, hissing at the sharp pain in her scalp. She twisted her head, staring at the charm that was caught in her curls.  Hypnos heard the knight muttering something under their breath, stepping far too close. 

A gloved hand caught her chin, their thumb pressed against her sudden flushed cheek. The leather was cool against her skin but it didn’t help to cool her skin. Hypnos’ heart raced, like a bird caught in her chest as the knight leaned in. 

With gentleness Hypnos didn’t expect, the knight began to untangle the charm out of her curls. 

“Stupid flower.” Hypnos said, desperately trying to look anywhere else. Her other hand tightened on the cloak.

”Poppy.” The knight said abruptly. Hypnos frowned up at them with a quick glance, her eyes on them once again. Even this close, their face was hidden away.

”Those flowers? They are called poppies.” Her knight chuckled, they sounded too amused for their own good. 

“Oh. Wowie, didn’t know that.” Hypnos whispered, once again unable to look at the knight. She sounded like a fool and she wanted the ground to open up to swallow her.

That little laugh had sent a pool of warmth to her chest and Hypnos was torn between running away, her hair be damned or leaning in closer. 

Hypnos wanted to say something else, something clever or seductive like Lady Aphrodite would come up with but her tongue felt heavy as she caught a whiff of that spicy scent again.

“They are supposed to help with pain and with rest.” Her knight spoke up, their voice low. “That's why the chaos egg gave you these gifts. Poppies belong to you, princess, just as sweet dreams and gentle sleep all belong to you.”

Hypnos felt the moment that her charm was freed, the knight’s warm hand curled around her wrist. With a shaky breath, Hypnos looked up, wishing desperately that she could see their eyes.

The knight shifted closer, there was barely any space left between them. Hypnos licked her lips nervously, her heart racing. Like a flash, Hypnos wanted to stand on her toes and kiss this stranger.

Then they jerked, as if realizing how close they and Hypnos were. Her knight immediately stepped away, dropping their hands away.

Hypnos swayed, thrown off balance by the abrupt change. She had been sure they were about to say something else. Her knight shifted the bag on their broad shoulder, already walking away. 

“Come on, princess. It is getting late.” They snapped. 

Hypnos gasped in outrage. She almost didn’t follow them but then remembered they had her bag. 

Fuming with a childish anger, She stuck her tongue out behind their back.

”Put that back in your mouth.” They called out, not even turning around to look at her.

Hypnos sighed loudly and had to run to get caught up.  Nothing was more said between them. Hypnos kept glancing over them but unable to find the right words.

“We are getting near the park’s entrance.” Her knight informed her and Hypnos blinked in surprise. She didn’t realize how close they were, too lost in her thoughts.

“Oh.” Hypnos said. They were still hidden by the evergreen shrubs but it would be easy for someone to spot them once inside the park.

Hypnos gave her Knight a side glance. “You should probably change back. People will notice someone walking around in shiny, gold metal. The movie set thing won’t work, trust me.” 

She couldn’t hide the hopeful tone of her words. Hypnos wanted to know the face behind that helmet. She wanted to know the person that damn egg had paired her with.

”Nope. Sorry, princess.” Her knight said, not sounding all that sorry. Hypnos resisted the urge to stomp her foot like a toddler.

The knight handed over her school bag and she huffed as she looked back at the city. “Stay in the lights, I will protect you until you get home safe.”

Hypnos frowned, turning back to glare at the knight but the space next to her was empty.

“W-what-“. Hypnos turned in a circle, trying to find her companion in the shadows of the park. “Oh come on!”

Hypnos tightened the red cloak around her like a blanket. She stomped her foot. “This is so unfair. I am keeping your cloak!”

~

(The next morning)

At the sound of a motorcycle, Hypnos lifted her head up to scowl at her new guest. Next to her in a sleek sport bike, you peered at her through the visor as you stopped the vehicle in the bike lane.

Thankfully this street was empty with no traffic, making it easy to hear.

You were dressed in your uniform of jeans and your worn leather jacket open carelessly to reveal a black shirt with your parents’ gym logo in the middle.

She felt her cheeks flushed, those familiar butterflies returning to her stomach. She pointly didn’t look at your chest. Or shoulders. 

It was so unfair how much cooler you were. All of Hypnos’ life, you were always this untouchable cool girl that everyone wanted but couldn’t have. 

It didn't do anything to kill her crush on you however, if anything it just made it worse.

“Get on.” You ordered, with a nod toward the backseat. “Did you sleep in again?”

“I was up late last night, you know, saving the world and all that.” Hypnos replied cheerfully. She could be lackadaisical as she wanted, she knew you wouldn’t believe her.

You rolled your eyes like Hypnos knew you would. “You are so spoiled. I have your stupid helmet in my side bag.” 

With a half-hearted glare,Hypnos moved quickly as she could, pulling out her cherry red kitty ears helmet. She loved it so much. 

With a practiced grace, she got on the bike as she placed her helmet on.

it would mess up her hair but as long as she didn’t get in trouble for being late for school again, she didn’t care.

She wrapped her arms around your solid waist just before you took off. Hypnos tucked herself in close with a sigh as you expertly weaved around the traffic. 

You should have been in school with her but you had studied harder than most students and graduated a solid year before anyone else to help with your family business. 

You were probably the reason your parents' business hasn't gone under especially with the rumored health problems of Patroclus. 

Hypnos gave you a squeeze, hoping you knew what she was trying to say. 

And oddly enough, afterwards the faint spicy smell of campfire lingered around her for the rest of the day.

She was going to ask you where you got that cologne, it should definitely be a clue on which guy from school was her knight.

~~~~~~

Speak. (Podcaster Au)

It was around three in the morning when you gave up the ghost. 

Sleep didn’t come again.

Your body felt too anxious, sure that enemies lurked in the shadows, ready to bury a blade in your neck. You rolled out the bed and began to pace in your room. You lived alone, so you wouldn’t be bothering anyone else with your craziness thankfully.

or PTSD as the therapist called it, throwing more alphabets at you along with bright orange pills bottles. Colorful pills that did nothing for you and you glared at the medicine on your nightstand.

It was unfair because you knew this stuff had to help others but it had been months, hell years since you got a good night's rest. Even nightmares would be better than insomnia at this point.

You just wanted to be able to close your eyes and sleep.

~

It was the desperation of seeing another sunrise with dry eyes that burned that sent you looking at podcasts, Zagreus never shut up about them. He always seemed to have one on, and constantly sent you links that you never opened.

Maybe there would be one that would bore you to sleep.

You carefully avoid the ones about current events, you were not in the right headspace for that shit right right now. Definitely not the true crimes one. You scoffed at the alpha males podcasts and rolled your eyes at the historical wars ones. 

No one knew what it was like until it was them in on the muddy fields, listening to everyone dying-

You shook your head sharply, slamming it against the headboard. You didn't wince at the sharp jolt of pain that shot your mind like lightning. You welcomed it. You resisted the urge to repeat it.

You closed your eyes as you forced yourself to do the breathing exercises. 

In.

Hold. 

Out. 

Breath. 

Half an hour later, you resumed your hunting, this time on the much softer couch. Beams of sunlight peered in, dust molts in the amber light. You debated trying to eat something but the thought of even trying made you nauseous. 

It was only by luck when you saw it. You remembered that Zagreus had mentioned it, the name unusual enough to stick in the dimness of your mind. It didn’t seem very popular.

You read the title again.

‘Shut up, Hypnos: A rambling podcast.’

Frowning, you skimmed over the playlist. It seemed this guy picked the most random topic imaginable and then spent anywhere from three to- you blinked and squinted, bringing your phone closer- sixteen hours just talking.

Shut up indeed, you thought with an exhausted chuckle. 

Deciding the seven hours episode on the history of the card game ‘Uno’ was a safe one, you began it as you stared up at the ceiling. There was the first minute of ads, a woman talking about building websites in a near orgasmic tone. 

Then.

”Helllloooo, welcome to my closet and to my podcast. If you don’t know me, my name is Hypnos - yes, I know the name is weird, tell that to my mom- and this is ‘Shut up, Hypnos.’ Where I will talk to you until you either toss your phone into a river with pure disgust at humanity or fall asleep from sheer boredom! Whichever comes first.” 

You blinked, of all the voices you expected, it wasn’t that one. It was airy, not bad but something that told you the man might be pitching it up higher than natural. 

But still, not bad.

”Uno. Dos- tres- No, only Uno please.” Hypnos laughed at his own joke. It was a nice laugh. Your eyes traced the sunbeams on your ceiling.

“That game was the bane of my existence from the moment I gained consciousness and the dexterity required to hold the cards. I don’t think I won a single game and I always ended up with half of the deck in my hands.” Hypnos rambled on. 

You never ever saw this man, not a single clue of what he looked like but you could picture it, a child scowling at the cards. 

“A family ‘game night’ brought up the memories of my horrible childhood and I decided to look up who created this game solely to torture me and me alone. So, my listener, if you haven’t driven us off a cliff yet, let me take you to a magical place called ‘Ohio’ in the year of 1971…”

The last thing you remembered was Hypnos’ outraged at the man who mortgaged his house for a mere eight thousands dollars - ‘shush, listener, I know it was the seventies and it worked out for them but still!’- and the way the golden light seemed to dip like honey.

Hypnos began speaking off topic something related to the game but his voice was faraway now, a quiet murmuring that flowed like the river lethe.

You didn’t remember closing your eyes.

~

When you woke up, you had dried drool on your chin with no idea what time or day it was. It was dim inside and it felt like you had been sleeping forever. Your mind was sluggish and it actually took you a moment to sit up. 

Your phone was on the ground, Hypnos’ cheerful voice still going. You rubbed at your face as you tried to wake up. 

He was no longer talking about ‘Uno’. You weren’t sure what it was about but when Hypnos had said something about genitalia and heroin in the same sentence, you finally picked your phone up.

The episode was named ‘The Ballad of Sexual Dependency by Nan Goldin: post Stonewall art’ 

Then you saw the time. 

You had slept for a solid fifteen hours straight. 

Your phone was clinging to life with six percent left and you needed to pee and you felt your stomach growl, hunger sharp in you for the first time in months. You still felt lost in the fabric of time and space, your head heavy with sleep.

Hypnos was still talking, ranting about an art project that a teacher failed him on because it wasn’t showing Hypnos’ truest intentions.

“What does that mean? What the fuck-“ Hypnos ranted, his anger so genuine that you smiled. “Why spend hours telling me art is subjective then go tell me that-“

You never felt better.

~

A week or so later, Hypnos was spinned around in his wheely chair, sipping on his ice coffee, trying to decide if he wanted to rant about the elephant and their pinnae. He eyed his computer with about twenty tabs he had pulled on elephant ears as he kept spinning.

Monie was staring at him, or rather at the iced coffee in his hand. Her little white Pom tail swayed with hope.

“You can’t have this.” Hypnos informed his dog for the millionth time, still spinning even as the world was getting blurry. “You will die.” 

Monie only made her black eyes bigger and wetter and so much sadder because Hypnos loved her enough to make sure she didn’t kill herself with caffeine.

“I know Monie, no one’s life is harder than yours, you silly dog.”

He heard a ping, meaning his Patreon just got something. Hypnos stopped himself, dizzy as he tried to see what he got. He usually got a dollar or two here and there. So he could definitely get more coffee. 

Maybe even enough for some Taco Bell. He was a big dreamer afterall. He laughed to himself as he looked.

His face went numb, his coffee spilled over his lap as he stared open mouthed at the screen.

He was reading it wrong.

Right? Right.

He automatically picked Monie up so she couldn’t lick at the spilled coffee.

Oh gods.

Rubbing his eyes hard as he could with one hand, he leaned forward, Monie still held aloft as he stared like a fool.

A fat, whole ten grand. It had to be a mistake. He was sure of that.

Then Hypnos saw the message, no real name, just random numbers and letters. 

Just a simple ‘Thank you, Hypnos.’

~~~~~~

Fly high (HTTYD Au, Icelos' pov )

The day they lost Dad, all Icelos remembered was fire. Fire and screams in the dead of the night, the black smoke of dragon fire hid even the stars. Her father’s scream of anguish was louder than even the mightiest dragon roar.

She remembered crying, her twin’s face was a mirror of her own pain.

It was the day they lost their Father too, a proud man who left as a hollowed out ancient tree after a great fire, one that still stood, blackened and ruined.

~

The few scraps of information that Icelos got about her Dad came from others, an off hand comment here or there from Achilles or a neighbor. They had uncles and aunts from their Dad’s side but they never visited anymore.

Icelos wondered often if they blame her father for what happened. 

Sometimes she wanted to write to them, her neat penmanship messy from her anger, to let them know, their stones of guilt were mere pebbles to the world that her Father carried.

She never did.

Instead she hoarded the few bit of her dad that she could.

’Your Dad had the worst sweet tooth I have ever seen, especially with honeyed goods.’ That had come from the baker, after waving a wooden spoon at Morpheus for taking a third helping of hard honey.

‘I still expect to see him napping on the porch.’ Achilles had remarked to Patroclus once, not realizing that Icelos was still in earshot.

And when she was younger, she found books tucked away in a box, many with notes inside an unfamiliar handwriting. It had been the mentions of her Father’s name along with ‘my husband’ that she realized it must be her Dad who wrote these.

She devoured every last one, reading the off hand comments and the bad jokes - so many that it reminded her of Morpheus- to some akin to worship. Icelos thought maybe if she listened hard enough, she would hear him like a lost god murmuring her ears.

Father rarely spoke of Hypnos, although sometimes Icelos caught how Father would watch them sometimes, like he saw someone else. His harsh demeanor softened for a moment.

Icelos wanted to ask him, what did he see? 

Was Dad there in the curve of Morpheus’ cheesy grin, or the way her twin brother would find a perfect patch of afternoon sun to nap in like a cat? 

Was it Photobtor and his eyes, perfect honey gold even in the dark of the night?

She had wanted to ask, perhaps more than anything, did she have anything from Hypnos that none of the others had? Something that was purely theirs. Hypnos and Icelos.

Father always turned away before Icelos found her courage, his broad shoulders just slumped ever so slightly.

Unwillingly, their dad had become a shade in their lives, or something so mystical that it would ruin the house if spoken aloud. Or maybe it would just burn away at the last remaining bit of their father, causing him to fall like an old tree, wood too rotten even for warmth in the cold, lonely night.

~

Icelos was so startled by how warm the dark scales of her night fury felt underneath her palm that her breath hitched. The dragon closed its eyes, completely trusting Icelos.

She let out a breathless laugh. Tears burning in her eyes.  

If her Father could see her now…

She looked down at the trusting beast, its hot breath gentle on her skin. 

He could never know.

~

So of course, Father found out a week later.

But there wasn't time, she had to save her best friend, her father and her grandparents, to show her brothers, everyone what it meant to really fly.

What she remembered wasn’t the flames reaching up for her. It was the determination in her night fury’s eyes. 

Sometimes Icelos wondered if she actually heard her Father’s voice, screaming out her name.

~

After everything, years later with dragons flying in the cold skies of winter, it was Icelos that Father brought to the clan meetings. 

She stayed quiet, standing by his elbow as he dealt with clan matters of hunting, food storage, supplies for homes and the construction of new pathways. There were disputes to settle between the clan members- land rights, cattle and so on- and there were so many countless little things that she never thought about before. 

Her Night Fury had fallen asleep about five minutes in and Icelos never felt such envy before.

When the last of the villagers left, her Father sighed heavily.  “I don’t suppose your dragon won’t mind adding to the fireplace for us?”

“What?” Icelos yelped, waking up her dragon who huffed at her. “But what else is there to do?”

Father smiled grimly as he nodded toward the books on the table. “We shall start with the fun stuff first. We have to go through the incident reports- your dragons are a little too enthusiastic about helping then we have the petitions, expense reports, contracts, reports or requests for help from other clans, livestocks records and so on.”

Icelos moaned in pain as she fell backward into a chair, rubbing her face. Her dragon grumbled at her, sending a burst of flames toward the fireplace. 

“My thanks.” Her father told the dragon, taking a large piece of dried jerky from the table and tossed it. Her nightfury snapped it up greedily, purring in pleasure.

”Father, must we?” Icelos glanced over the piles of books. Was this why she didn’t see her Father until late in the evening? Her knee ached, the false leg cold against her skin. 

She used to like winter but as the weather got deeper and she got older, she found herself not enjoying it as much as she did in her youth.

Icelos shifted and somehow her dearest friend knew, pressing its warm body against her leg, resting their heavy head on her lap. She gave them a pat on their head.

Father approached her, his brow furrowed. “Is your leg bothering you?”

”Yeah but I want to stay.” Icelos said firmly, straightened her back as she met her Father’s hard stare. She kept her head high, not glancing away like someone else might have from her father. 

She may be older now but a single glance from those eyes could still make her feel little like a girl with her hand in the cookie jar.

For a long moment, Icelos thought he would order her to go home but he just nodded, pulling out a leather flask from his cloak. When he poured her a small drink of ale, she nearly went bug-eyed. Father was a hard ass about his kids drinking hard liquor.

”Just this once.” He told her with a wry glance. She thought she almost saw a rare smile. “For the leg. Don’t tell your brothers.” 

Icelos nodded, suddenly feeling very grown up with her drink and paperwork.

After a deep drink for himself, Father brought the books closer to her along with papers and quills. She didn’t have to do any of the paperwork yet but he went over each piece of information carefully, telling her the context and exactly why it mattered. 

It was late in the night when they were done. Icelos slumped in her chair and she watched with heavy eyes as Father placed the paperwork away. 

“Do you know why I chose you?” Father said abruptly, causing Icelos to wake up a little. After a moment, she gave him a goofy smile.

”My neat handwriting?” She guessed, not sure where he was going with that. He huffed, an almost laugh.

”No.” he told her, returning to stand next to her. He placed a large, warm hand on her shoulder. His expression shifted, unreadable in the firelight. “You remind me so much of your dad.”

Icelos blinked, her lips parting but no sounds came out. How long had it been since she last heard Father speak of Hypnos, the shade that haunted their lives? The one that Father still seemed to look for sometimes. 

Father was no longer looking at her, staring into the fire. “Your dad wasn’t suited for leadership but he knew how to… keep me grounded, to make sure I didn’t lead with an ax in my hand and damnation in the other.”

Icelos only nodded, too stunned to speak. She gave her confused dragon a pet on the head, the smooth scales comforting her. 

“You have the best of him. He knew how to stay cheerful even in the darkest times, he was gentle even if he couldn’t help but make smart comments, especially to me.” Father continued, his voice was so quiet, so hopelessly fond. 

Years and years later, he still sounded like he was in love. “Just like you.”

”Oh.” Icelos swallowed, tears forming unwillingly. She didn’t want to cry because if she did, Father might stop.

”You could be a great leader for our clan, Icelos. You have his gentle heart but my iron hand. The fact you already unified our clan and the dragons is only the tip of the iceberg of far you could go.” Father turned back to her, his eyes watchful.

And maybe she was imagining it in her sleep deprivation but- he looked proud. Of her.

She nodded, trying to appear like a leader. She wanted that desperately, to fit in the role her father gave her. “I want to be great. For you and dad.” 

“You already are.” He said, squeezing her shoulder gently.

~

Icelos thought she was going mad. 

Her body was shaking, her breathing kept hitching sharply. Her Night Fury let Icelos braced herself against them, their eyes locked on the pair before her.

A Light Fury was glaring at them, their teeth bared but the man next to the dragon didn’t move, didn’t breath.

How often had Icelos seen those white curls, those golden eyes reflected back in the mirror?

Faintly she heard a noise. Soft and broken. 

Then she realized it came from her twin. Morpheus was shocked into silence, his harsh breathing the only thing hint to his anger, to his pain while Phobetor watched with an hesitant expression. 

“Oh my little starlights.” Hypnos said quietly. the once shade, the ghost that haunted their home, that broke her father beyond repair, smiled warmly. 

His sunlit eyes were bright with tears. “It really is you. All of you.”

Just like that, Icelos and everything she thought she knew fell apart.

~

In the chaos of everything, Icelos had tried to plan for how Dad and Father were going to be reunited after she fixed the issues with the alpha dragon and the bastard keeping other dragons locked up. 

Only for Father to come looking for his lost ducklings. His stormcutter, an old king like her father, has swept in the hiding place with a liquid grace. 

There was no chance to warn him.

Icelos waited for the rage, for the hurt to spill forward like the flames of a Monstrous Nightmare. 

It was clear that Hypnos was doing the same, his shoulders tight, arms crossed over his chest. Father was staring at Hypnos like he couldn't believe he was really there, like he was seeing a ghost. 

Her father was rarely surprised, the only other time she had seen this was when he had caught her riding her beloved dragon. Then he flew in a rage unlike anything she had ever seen.

For painfully long moments, the silence grew. The heaviness of it barring down on her shoulders. 

“I would welcome you to my humble domicile but you didn't even knock.” Hypnos quipped, his voice was airy but Icelos heard the tension in it, a bird’s racing heartbeat. “Just like our wedding night. No manners whatsoever.”

Icelos knew she looked bugged eyed just like her brothers, no one had ever spoken to their father like that. Not even their most ferocious enemies.

Father stepped closer, his eyes locked onto Hypnos. Hypnos swallowed, but didn't look at him, eyes on Father's chest. 

Slowly as if Hypnos was more mist than flesh, Father touched his chin and lifted his head up, studying every line and curve of his husband's face.

Father looked raw, like something made new. His expression tender as a heartbreaking smile broke across his face, his eyes shining. He was about to cry, Icelos realized.

“You're as beautiful as the day I lost you.” His voice was low, rough and so in love. Hypnos gasped, his face crumbling with tears.

They embraced, clinging together so tightly not even the gods could part them now. 

Hypnos was sobbing, his words spilling out of him in a rush. Father was shushing him, his own mighty form shaking as he cupped the back of Hypnos’ head.

At that point, Phan touched her shoulder, jerking his head toward a different, far away area. Icelos nodded, realizing that the other two had already left, giving their parents some privacy.

Later, Icelos dangled her feet off the edge, smiling as her night fury chased the light fury. She had a suspicion her dragon was madly in love but she won't tease them just yet. 

Morpheus had taken off, needing to lick his own wounds, still hurt and angry at their dad. Her twin was speaking to Phobetor of what happened that night. 

He had been far too young the night it happened. 

And Icelos… 

She watched from high above,a stolen moment in the gentle lights, the soft greenery of the cave as her parents swayed together. 

Their voices were too low, too far away but they looked happy, even with tears marks on their cheeks. 

Maybe it was too soon, everything still too raw by the scraping of lost years on their souls but somehow she knew this would be for the better.

~~~~~~

Decisions (Reincarnation au)

Hypnos woke up alone, his cheeks stained with tears. He sniffed, rubbing his face as he sat up. His wings fluttered against his hands. The blanket was spilling off of him and onto the floor.

It was already fading, whatever it was that brought him to tears although the familiar grief lingered in his chest.

Waking up like this was something that just happened sometimes. Hypnos wondered if he would ever get used to it. If he even should get used to it.

”You’re crying.” His captain’s voice was low, gravelly as the bed dipped under your weight. 

“Was. Now I am at the gross snotty phase.” Hypnos corrected, shifting as you pulled him into your arms. Hypnos sighed, tucking his head under your chin. Humans were so much warmer than his species, their bodies hot as a pure summer day.

His wings flared out and lifted up, the tips kissing your cheeks as a greeting. You turned your head, nuzzling against one, and Hypnos couldn’t hide his smile. He loved that his captain tried to mimic his species’ sign of affection with his own human ones.

Your hand rubbed up and down his back. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Hypnos hummed low in his chest, thinking about it. 

It was no secret that you had oftentimes disliked the other versions of you. Your born calloused, possessive and beastly nature against the civilized knight of your mind were often at war with each other. 

Sometimes the knight won, other times it was the beast. Sometimes they coexisted. 

Hypnos didn’t have the heart to tell you that you still carried such behaviors even now. 

Your large hand spread over Hypnos’ lower back when someone else looked a little too long, the way you would dipped your head to listen to him, the adoring nips on his vulnerable neck as you worshiped him like an pagan and their god. 

Beast and man, always at war with each other.

“I don’t agree with some of the choices I- the other me made. I understand but I don’t agree. I think.” Hypnos sighed. He wiggled in your lap until he could look at you. “How do you deal with it?”

“I call them -or myself- a worthless bastard and try to move on. Can’t change it now.” You said, trying to lighten the mood like Hypnos often did.

Hypnos nodded slowly, then decided he didn’t want to think about it. He silded his wings behind your head, pulling you down for a greedy kiss. Your hands squeezed his waist, pulling his slender body flushed against yours.

Later, tangled together like vines and dozing, Hypnos mused on cycles, death and birth, the ebbs and flows of time until his eyes grew heavy and he returned to the realms of dreams.

~~~~~~

Dappled lights (a quiet world au)

In one life, there was a butterfly with gleaming red wings, fluttering slowly on top of a single daisy as it ate. 

It was unaware of the other butterfly watching them, admiring the shine and artwork that was their existence in the golden lights.

They will only have two weeks together, a mere blink in the eyes of gods but for them it was forever and a day.

In this life, one was a wolf, born with a deadly grace and teeth that gleamed. The other was a lost half breed, their fur soft as snow. They ran together under the moon, eyes shining and tongue lolling, they were light and darkness side by side.

When one had to leave, the other followed, curled around their mate in their small den. 

Another, so short was the lives of mayflies, only here for a moment but they fell together.

in this one, they were oak saplings, growing together side by side. Their branches grew out as they got taller. One stopped, unable to grow anymore but the other, healthy and strong, grew the branches downward until they met, tangled together forevermore.

Just one more ( it is always just more life together, just more one moment then they would be satisfied. They never are) 

But just one more, a sheep and its guard dog, bloodied to save their beloved companion. 

But just one more, two sparrows and their wings lifted by the winds, the sun shining down on them.

Just one more, one was fire and the other was fuel.

One more, an impossible, empty sea and a life giving river met, a line marking where they kissed.

One. it was the sun, warm and golden and the other was the cool, dark earth. Life bloomed wherever the sun caress them.

More. They were void and the other was everything.

Again?

Time was a flat circle, reality was infinite and they spun and spun around, laughing as they kissed.

Again.

[steddieficfind]

Actually looking for two fics, similar topic though. Both were on Ao3. The first was Witch Steve where he becomes Joyce's apprentice. I remember there's a part about a bracelet that Steve accidentally uses on Eddie. I think he also made a luck charm and Eddie got angry for the false confidence. The second one was Witch Eddie and was a Practical Magic au where Eddie curses himself to never fall in love unless it's the perfect guy. Max and Dustin were Steve's kids in it and Eddie made them charms.

Requests 1017 & 1018!

1017 is Impractical Magic by EddieSpaghetti, on Ao3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42408330

And 1018 is And I Knew (in the Crystalline Knowledge of You) by PippinPips, on Ao3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43381260

Send us an ask if either of these don’t sound right & Remember to comment, bookmark, and leave kudos!

[nicestgirlonline]

Thank you so much for the tag @nickfowlerrr !!

Rules: Make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! Then tag as many people as you have WIPS.

Here are all of the WIPs that actually have a shape and form, please ask away about anything!! Most of them lean dark but who knows.

Natural Disasters - Tyler Owens x Ex! Reader

One and Only - Jake Seresin x Reader (dark)

Vacation Mode -Bucky Barnes x Reader

Something Sweet part 2

Bad Bosses AU - Obsessive Boss Steve Rogers x Reader, Lawyer Bucky Barnes x Personal Assistant Reader

Demonology -Incubus Bucky Barnes x Reader

I Put A Spell On You - Steve Rogers x Reader

Impractical Magic - Wanda Maximoff x Reader, Agatha Harkness x Reader

Welcome To Westview -Bucky Barnes x Reader

Deep, Dark and Dangerous - dark!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Biker Bucky AU

Hot To Go! - Carmy Berzatto x Reader

Hungry Heart -angsty!Carmy Berzatto x Childhood friend!Reader

Childhood Bully trope with Curtis Everett

How To Be A Good Wife -multi-characters suburbia/disturbia AU

some no pressure tags: @targaryenvampireslayer @navybrat817 @foxgloveprincess @shamrockqueen @bucky-bucket-barnes @thotski @ddejavvu @latetotheparty89-blog @angrythingstarlight @sunflowersteves

[phoenixinthefiles]

The first official entry of my Talia and Bruce “Healthy” Divorce au (otherwise known as “HEALTHY”)

inspired by this post I made

Damian Wayne sighed, sliding down the wall and resigning himself to a long wait. It had been at least an hour since his parents disappeared behind the door beside him and only five minutes after they’d entered the yelling started. 

He used to cry when they argued; lock himself up in his room, flop onto his bed and sob into his pillow until his father came up to check on him. Tears running down his face, while he was scolded for locking his door and not telling anyone he was in his room.

But that was years ago, Damian was still a little kid then; he’s used to the arguing now, especially after the divorce.

It wasn’t a surprise when it happened but it still took Damian’s breath away, he hadn’t known exactly what it meant. Jason had explained it to him, jaw tense and teal eyes clouded with emotion. 

“They won’t be together anymore you already know that, but it’s a little more than that. You know when we watched Harry Potter and Snape took an unbreakable vow? Well marriage is like that, you say these really powerful unbreakable vows. But when someone breaks the vow or can’t keep it anymore they get a divorce, it’s like a really powerful thing and it tears the connection of the vows and unlinks the two people who took them. As you can imagine that hurts a lot, it’s more than just not being together.

Damian still remembers the way he could hear Jason’s voice trembling on the last part . And how through tear-filled, blurry eyes, he could see the hurt on his brother’s face. He didn’t like to think about that memory during the day, but it was always waiting for him when he closed his eyes at night-so he had no choice. 

His parents always said they wanted the best for him, and that they still loved him even though their love for each other had stopped. But they also used to tell him that he was a product of their love. Damian knows Math, Jason had been teaching him about school since before he could talk.

If the number decides it doesn’t want to be in the same problem as a different number one, then one plus one could no longer equal two. So, if two people decide they don’t want to be with each other anymore,  what happens to their number 2? Jason told Damian that Math had practical daily uses, but it must be impractical too because it works really well on divorce. 

He’s interrupted from his thoughts by the sound of creaks from the floor. He looks over and sees Jason walking towards him looking thoroughly unimpressed with his eavesdropping.

“I don’t know why you’re listening in on them, just gonna be hearing the same old crap you usually hear.” Damian looks up at his brother and takes in his downturned brow, tense jaw, and frowned lips that always make an appearance when dealing with the topic of their parents. His parents thought he took the divorce the hardest, they couldn’t be anymore wrong. 

“I wasn’t listening,” Jason scoffs, “I wasn’t, not at first, but it’s different this time.” It was different; they weren’t as loud, there more spaces of silence, and from the occasional ruffling he heard, they were actually sitting. 

“Yeah right, don’t get your hopes up they’re not gonna magically love each other again.”

“I know that,” Damian retorts. He doesn’t bring up the fact when his parents first had the big conversation they made it clear they still loved each other. Even he wasn’t naive enough to believe that.

Jason is about to make another smart comment when the door handle to the study jiggles. Damian scrambles to his feet and he and Jason face the door, whoever was coming out must have stopped to say something. 

Damian doesn’t realize his hand until he feels Jason grab it and rub his knuckles. 

“Relax, D.” Damian nods aware of how dramatic he’s being, it’s not like they’re waiting on a jury’s decision. But it feels like they are because no matter what Jason says, Damian isn’t the only one still holding out hope.

The door opens and Damian’s mouth goes dry. His father walks through the door and shifts slightly when he looks at Jason and Damian, not surprised to see them but nervous? 

Damian feels Jason’s hand tighten on his when his father opens and closes his mouth. He doesn’t know why there’s so much build-up, they’ve been in this situation countless times since the divorce and the outcome is always the same. 

His father shifts again, this is the part where he follows the “how to talk to your kids during divorce” book, script.

“Your mother’s pregnant; we’re having a baby in six months.” 

That is not a part of the script. 

TADAAAA✨✨✨✨

@vvkan

[thatmexisaurusrex]

Impractical Magic

Hey, people! This is my fourth fill for @sambuckyhalloweenbingo2022 for the prompts "Pumpkins", "Movie Night", and "Witching Hour". This will be for my @winterfalconweek WinterFalcon Bingo Round 2 Card for the fill K1 "Spell Gone Wrong". This is also a Halloween romcom I made inspired by the film Practical Magic and gifted to @elektraking. Enjoy this little Practical Magic inspired romcom! 🥰

Impractical Magic

| Pairing: SamBucky | Rating: M | Chapters: 3/3 | WC: 10.7K |

Summary: Sam's family is beloved by their town, charmed with all sorts of gifts. However, like everyone in his family, all of Sam's lovers are cursed with bad luck.

Excerpt:

“This? This happens all the time, don’t worry about me,” said Bucky, but Sam knew that was wrong, he knew it as he kept holding Bucky’s hand even after Bucky was fully standing, “Are you okay? Those pumpkins flew everywhere.” This wasn’t happening to Sam. “Mr. Bucky, where should we put the pumpkins?” asked AJ as he and Cass held armfuls of pumpkins in their hands. “Oh. Uh. There’s a pile in the back,” explained Bucky as he released Sam’s hand and started to gather some of the pumpkins from Sam’s nephew’s arms, “I got these, don’t you worry – ” Bucky toppled over his broken booth again, and Sam knew it to be true. He knew what he had feared had come to pass. Sam wasn’t going to let it happen.

READ THE REST ON AO3

[findafight]

RE: Supernatural Hawkins au - I feel like some angst can be introduced in a way of Eddie not trusting Steve after he tells the party about the grimoire etc (and rightfully so bc he doesn’t know Steve like the rest of them do) and corners him after the meeting to say that he’s keeping his eye on him and that this better not be a fucked up way of getting to all of them -

And Steve - being like okay. I get it. Keep me accountable, keep a close eye on me. and Eddie’s like. Fuck. Wait why do I feel-

Ooooooooh anon. Hoohoohoo...

Now, I imagine that were this to happen it would be before vecna et al but after Steve becomes the Pied Piper of supernatural Hawkins. So maybe his parents come home over the winter holidays and give him the lowdown on the Family Business, and Steve freaks out a bit and sits on it for a day or two before calling his not quite code red.

And Dustin brings Eddie along because, Steve, he's basically Pack now too, and Eddie is like wait what the fuck those rumours about Steve being the almost-humans of Hawkins go-to babysitter are true??

And Dustin gives him a Look, like yes, obviously, Dustin has been talking Steve up for months did Eddie not believe him? Rude.

Robin interrupts with "can we PLEASE get this show on the road? Steve looks like he's about to keel over from stress."

"wait right here" Steve says as he bolts out of his living room and reenters lugging a book that's huge. Just. Completely impractical in size. I'm talking 75 x 75 cm and 20 cm high type deal. Stupid big. Occult big. Ritual big. It sets Eddie's teeth on edge.

Steve heaves it onto the coffee table, and says "we have a big problem"

Nancy Wheeler leans over to inspect the tome, the goddamn Grimoire, and Steve smacks her hand away from opening it.

He stands, hands on his hips, and takes a deep breath.

"over winter break, my parents came home. And they told me about the...the Family Business, as they called it." He glares at the book, his nose scrunching with the scowl and Eddie might call it cute but that's for him to know and now else to find out. "They're Monster Hunters."

There is a silence that stretches and stretches and Eddie thinks he might vomit from the turbulent emotions filling the room, none of which, however, are the betrayal he expects.

"Steve..." Robin starts, trails off.

"they don't know anything, apparently, despite this shit being in the family for generations." Steve begins pacing. "They have no idea about any of you, or that Hawkins is apparently the unofficial supernatural capital of Indiana. Everyone is safe, but I--"his voice cracks, and Eddie would maybe feel sorry if this wasn't King Steve telling him this, wasn't a goddamn hereditary Monster Hunter standing in front of him. He just feels fucking pissed.

"I'm worried that they're gonna start hanging around more, and that they're going to realize that--" Steve's hands are running through his hair, nervous. "I don't know, I smell like a pack of werewolves or my best friend is my Selkie magic assigned soulmate" and Eddie wasn't sure he believed that rumour even when Dustin confirmed it, that it didn't seem possible for someone like Harrington to be bound by such pure magic to Robin Buckley. "- or that whenever I go out a gaggle of kids that aren't quite human seem to follow me."

Robin stands, opening her arms for him to fold into, puzzle pieces locking together.

"I just don't want anyone to get hurt because of me." He says, muffled, into Robin's shoulder. If Eddie didn't know better, he'd say he was crying.

Dustin quickly joins the hug, and the rest of the gaggle of teens, including Erica Sinclair, follow suit. Nancy stays back with Eddie, arms crossed and brows furrowed.

Eddie can taste the worry in the room, a sour bitterness on his tongue, all directed towards Steve. He doesn't get it. The guy just admitted to being part of a dynasty of people who kill the kind of people in this room, and no one is worried he's going to hurt them, just that he might be hurt.

Eddie lets the others do the planning, which is generally accepting that they need to let Claudia Henderson and the Sinclair parents know, not tell the Wheelers, and keep Steve's parents far away from Hawkins. Easy. Sure.

He hangs back as Nancy herds the kids into her station wagon, waving as she leaves. Robin putters in the kitchen, so Eddie takes the opportunity to step into Steve's space.

"I don't know if this is some fucked up long con, Harrington, to get all the inside information on the supernatural beings of Hawkins, but I'm watching you." He jabs a finger into Steve's chest, snarling. "Somehow you got those pups to trust you, worry about you, but I don't. If you even seem a threat to those kids, or you step outta line, I'll -" then it hits him, the wave of sadness and grief and--and relief. Eddie has never been good at individual emotions, finds them confusing and too specific and make his teeth hurt, and he feeds better from groups anyways, but. Steve is all but screaming how he feels into Eddie's ear.

"good." Steve says. Nods. "You'll look out for them." As though that's a normal thing to say when a vampire has expressly threatened you. "If something happens, if my parents get to close or shit hits the fan, I need you to do what you need to do so they're safe. So this godforsaken town is safe."

Eddie blinks, stepping back "wait. You want me to-"

Steve nods again. "If push comes to shove I need you to burn any trace we were ever here and make sure all the little fae kids are safe." He takes a breath. The hard zest of determination overpowers anything else Eddie might otherwise have sensed. "You have to kill me and my parents, and make sure no one ever knows."

[gerbiloftriumph]

Floating Castle Liveblog (second read)

Turns out I just can't stay away from this book, or stop myself from doing live updates on Goodreads, probably to the irritation of my followers there and to the chagrin of the website itself, which is now overwriting old updates with newer ones, thus, my need to post them all here. For posterity.

And because I love Telgrin just that much.

March 17, 2019 –

page 0

I feel a sad reading funk coming on and the only way I can think to save it is with my boi, the greatest sassy villain ever, Telgrin. Awww yiss (I don't feel the mood for Princess Bride for once, so next step down it is). Feel free to follow along as I keysmash glee about this doofy lame villain and his impractical floating castle (usingthekqreddit's.pdfshackcoughahhhhkkk you didn't hear that from me.)

page 3

It just cracks me up to see a literal castle sailing by in the storm. Alex can pretend all he likes that it’s just a cloud formation—it’s still dang wacky and impractical.

page 8

Graham: Did you see anything weird out there? Alexander: Well, I mean. A literal floating castle, probably? Graham: Yes, that sounds sensible. Carry on. I’m grinning like a fool and I’m not even ten pages in. This book is my flavor of perfect delight, glossy purple prose and all.

page 11

The fact that Telgrin's castle is in a perpetual thundercloud? He's the sort of dude who would, in a modern au, just listen to the rainymood app constantly. I feel it deeeeeeep in my soul. The anticipation of the plot points has me positively grinning and I keep telling myself, "No, slow down and enjoy. The kelpie and troll and frog and tree wizard and all aren't going anywhere. It's okay."

page 14

I want to scoop Graham up in a big hug. He seems like a great person, such a strong king. Showing nothing but peace and respect to everyone, regardless of social status, who comes in talking about that Spooky Castle, and he's completely chill *until* he's alone with Alexander and can finally drop that mask and honestly show his fear. Even if you're unfamiliar with the source material, this is good character detail.

page 17

"A strange castle has intruded upon the peace of Daventry. I think it fair to assume that only a powerful magic could have transported it here." No, Graham, flying castles are perfectly normal things. Like birds. (here comes telgrin the sassmaster i'm so exciiiitedddd)

page 18

"While Graham occupied the throne, what misfortune could long hold sway over Daventry? What evil could prevail?" cough foreshadowing cough cough hack wheeze

page 19

I still believe with my whole heart that this bearded and blustery and large Sir Brian is a reference to Brian Blessed and I don't care what anyone else thinks.

page 21

Heeeeeeere's Telgrin! Struttin' in, debris from the door all in a cloud, swinging that stupid crystal staff in step with his walk, and freaking "pleased by the dumbfounded reaction his appearance had caused." My melodramatic diva. Let's do thiiiiis.

page 22

Graham, furious, demands to know why Telgrin's here. Telgrin flings back his head and cackles: "'Who am I? Why, I am your new neighbor! Have you not seen my castle there in the distance?' The man paused. He seemed to expect Graham to say something then, but the king simply stared at him. This seemed to unnerve the stranger somewhat" because how do you banter in silence? You can't be the sassmaster if no one plays! :3

page 23

Telgrin wouldn't come to the castle to announce himself as Ye Olde Villain until Graham had summoned a full contingent of knights. Telgrin, Sassmaster and Diva, requires a proper audience before strutting around. <3

page 23

"Do you seriously believe that simply declaring yourself king will make you king in truth?" "*Believe* it? I know it. It is a fact. Who can dispute it?" Graham rose slowly from his throne, straightened to his full height. Unblinking, his gaze was fixed upon Telgrin. "*I* can." "You dare defy me?" "I do." A twisted smile tugged briefly at the corners of Telgrin's mouth. "Good. I was rather hoping you would." Sassy.

page 25

Telgrin is so blissed out on his own sassy triumph that we could SO EASILY dropkick him and snap that stupid crystal staff in half and we'd win and the book would be over in a mere 30 pages. I swear, he's not watching his back at all. Alexander, take him out at the knees! ...or, don't. That's fine. We contracted a full novel from Sierra. I get it.

page 32

I want a Valanice book. I want this series to be a quartet instead of a trilogy. I want this so deep in my soul.

page 32

TREE WIZARD. I can't stop grinning; I love tree wizard. He's trying to nod and shrug and he doesn't have shoulders so he can't, because he's a TREE.

page 40

"Telgrin is a stealer of souls." "A stealer of souls? What's that?" Alexander, the name is on the tin. It isn't hard to figure out.

page 41

I know I should stop updating every few pages. I'm spoiling things and probably being annoying but it's been a long weekend and this is Exactly my flavor of comedy: tree wizard is offering Cyril to Alex, since he "'does all those things that I can no longer do for myself. And he is very good at keeping the woodpeckers away.' This did not sound like the sort of help that Alexander was looking for." Be polite, Alex. :3

page 45

Of all the things I remember from reading this book a year ago, Tree Wizard and his Tea is one of my top favorite mental images. Doesn't matter that we're slowly turning into a tree. Tea time is very important and we will Not miss it. There's even fanart of Tree Wizard and his tea on Tumblr, that's how important it is.

page 45

Alexander (paraphrased): "Sooo...do you know how to stop being a tree?" Morowyn: "Oh, yeah, totes figured that out. Could do it whenever I wanted. Kinda has a drawback, though." Alexander: "Yeah? What's that?" Morowyn: "I would immediately die." Alexander: "......yep, that's a drawback."

March 19, 2019

page 57

“Do you know where to look for a soul? Have you ever seen one?” One would assume it’s glowy and vaguely Graham-shaped.

page 64

I can not believe I forgot about this Literal Ringwraith character. It’s...just a Ringwraith. Pure and simple and obvious.

page 74

I did remember the Literal Lembas Bread, though. Fantasy tropes! *jazz hands*

page 78

One of the classic fantasy tropes is doing a long walk from point a to point b. I’ve got to give Mills credit: I don’t think I’ve read any other book that fills its protagonists up with magic bread that induces energetic power-walking before.

page 80

I remember being annoyed by this conversation the first time, but that was before I realized I held a Masterpiece of High Literature in my hands: “Good apple,” Cyril said. “Very good.” “Sweet.” “Mmm.”

page 87

“A rope, some apples,” Cyril said, frowning. “I still don’t see what you’re planning.” It’s called A Sierra Solution, Cyril, and they only make sense half the time, because this game series is haaaaard.

page 90

Kelpie rodeo. In what sensible fantasy novel would this be allowed? None, man. I love this book. [gerbil note: this scene also has fanart, because this book is amazing]

March 19, 2019

page 97

Alexander: Ho there! Sir Ogre! Ogre: /what did you call me/?! At least, that’s how it should go.

[gerbil note again: i did totally steal this very lame joke for captive crown later on and i'm not even sorry about it]

page 100

I didn’t quite realize how dorky this was the first time, but now I’m paying attention I’ve realized: Telgrin has exactly One lone storm cloud that occasionally spits out a lightning bolt, just hovering over the tower. In my head, this looks like a Winnie the Pooh cloud. Is that all the magic he could summon? One tiny cloud? Lame, and yet So On Brand for my sassmaster.

page 107

We've now entered the Road to El Dorado sequence of the book and I'm perfectly content. Barrel scene eheheheheeeee

page 112

Once again, the book stresses, it is but *one* cloud. One very black and lightning filled cloud, but a single cloud, nevertheless, providing all the ambient noise and mood. I find this bizarrely hilarious. It feels like Telgrin's equivalent of keeping his phone on low battery mode so he can keep using the Rainymood app.

page 120

The sassmaster's lair is just the most Extra thing. It's like he read a book on what villains are supposed to do, so he did it. He's got it all: high ceilings that vanish to dark, ludicrous amounts of moldering velvet curtains, "hideously ornate" braziers, and a perfectly silly black throne. Telgrin, pleaaase this is so unnecessary and not remotely sensible. You've copied someone else's homework, and badly. ilu.

page 121

And Alexander refuses to play the game. Telgrin has all these expectations on how this conversation is meant to go, he's basically reciting a script, and Alexander's just like, "Uhhhh....what?" So Telgrin moves on to Cyril, like Cyril will play along properly. I just can't. I love Telgrin to unfeasible levels of nonsense.

page 122

(Incidentally, I'm still kinda salty that Graham's soul isn't in the throne room, wedged in Telgrin's overly-flashy staff. It just feels more right than where he *actually* is.)

page 123

"You are an evil man." "So it has been said." Telgrin shrugged. "Personally I've always found that such abstractions do not apply well to life in the real world. They make matters that are by their very nature complex seem rather too simple, don't you think?" "Evil," Alexander repeated. Telgrin sighed. "I can see that you're really not up to a probing and dispassionate philosophical discussion" Modern AU: he's a Bro

page 125

I'm fairly certain this reference to Alexander having a hard time with stairs is a reference to the older KQ games in which if you misstep, you're going down, and if you're more than a few feet up, you're a dead man and you've got to reload a save. :)

March 21, 2019

page 129

Out of curiosity, I googled a Barikar to see if this was a real fantasy creature, but the only actual result is from the King's Quest Fanwiki to tell me that, yes, Telgrin owns a Barikar. ....nice, I guess.

page 130

By all technical and decent writing standards, this book is probably awful. Er. I mean, awfully great. High literature, deffo. But it *feels* like a King's Quest game. Every new place is described with just enough detail that you can so easily picture it in those stark, retro early gaming colors, or that pixel painting KQ5 style. I super love it.

page 131

The King's Quest fanwiki tells me that Telgrin owns the only Barikar in all of the entire canon of all fantasy, but it doesn't tell me if Telgrin *loves* his Barikar. I hope he does, because no one else possibly could. What a hideous beastie.

page 134

You boys should be ashamed of yourselves, disposing of a barikar. There was only one in ALL of fantasy EVER and now there's none.

page 139

I hate how funny I think it is that Alexander isn't even pulled together enough to answer his own mental questions. "Yes" is not always the correct answer, sir.

page 143

sassmaster diva telgrin's tragic childhood backstory-----OH WAIT NO IT'S NOT TRAGIC HE'S JUST ALWAYS BEEN A PUNK. I love him.

March 27, 2019

page 143

I wonder what Telgrin’s first thought was when he, A Pathetic Scullery Boy (tm) chopped Owen’s head off, presumably with a Vaguely Magical movement because clean-one-chop head removal is hard even with the help of gravity, man, and Owen’s head just started swearing at him from the floor. Like. That’s a dang weird mental image.

page 144

He holds his own head under his arm like it’s a football and it cracks me up. It’s meant to be serious and scary, probably, but I just love this headless ghost.

page 146

The most over the top baby monitor ever created

page 152

In fairness, this part is one of the most like the game-version would probably be, and it works the least because Alexander is working from information we don’t have. As a gamer we would have heard all Owen’s instructions and had to replicate them perfectly to avoid nasty game overs. As a reader it would have been repetitive for Owen to tell us, then watch Alex act, but there’s a disconnect now.

page 156

“After allowing himself to wallow in depression for a short while”—like, twenty seconds, if that.

page 180

Sinofas (paraphrased): Sooooo.....about that magic flying leap out of the tallest tower. What was that about? Alexander: We had a pressing need to leave the castle. Sinofas: Ever heard of a *door,* sirrah? (do note that I haven't stopped smiling for like twenty pages; this book's greaaat)

page 181

Alexander, paraphrased: So....you're not...friends with Telgrin, are you? Sinofas: He put his Giant Castle in my front yard and won't move it. What do you think??

page 183

I can't believe Mills feels he has to point out that Alexander makes for one Handsome Frog. A "rather large and handsome frog," indeed. Ffff.

page 183

And, I quote, "Did you speak, Sir Frog?" "That's Prince Frog, to you." Alexander, *please* reign in some of your sass. It's not helping matters.

page 198

I feel like the further this book goes, the stronger Alexander's sass gets. It'll never be Telgrin levels of sass because that man is the Sassmaster Diva, but it's dang good.

page 212

Sassmaster Telgrin *still* can't get anyone to dialogue properly with him. Graham's just as obstinate as Alexander and is really good at One Syllable Responses. My gorgeous royal family.

page 223

"At that moment, her second head . . . appeared to wake. It opened its eyes, blinked, and said, "Hmph. What's happening? Where am I?" "It's all right, dear," the first head said. "Go back to sleep. I'm just going to kill this man here." "Oh, that's all right then." I adore this book in ways I cannot express.

page 225

I'm so glad magic in this world, with this staff, works by wishing. So, basically, Telgrin must have said, "I wish King Graham's soul was mine" and so it was, and "I wish I had a fireball to kill Alexander," and bam. It's like he's making little birthday cake wishes, but Horrible Magic happens instead and it's kinda hilariously great. :3

page 230

Telgrin, through a magical hologram because this book is great: "Oi! There you are!" Alexander, exhausted and annoyed: "Whaddya want, Telgrin?" "What do you think? You've stolen my staff. I want it back." "That's too bad. I'm fairly sure that I don't want to give it to you." Now is not the time to start having a holographic fight. Pull back that sass, kiddos.

April 2, 2019

page 231

"The fact that this book is about the same size and heft as my Nintendo Switch tablet with like a pt 14 font, and the fact that it's still taken me into week three to read it, means I'm nice and deep in this reading slump. This should be a six hour read at *maximum*. Telgrin, take me away.

page 236

Alexander, you can't just order princesses to do what you want with magic. that's so rude.

page 237

To be 100% clear, Alexander, Telgrin learned literally everything he knows from Owen, and we can see how Telgrin turned out. One miiiight assume that Owen himself is not the most Noble of nobility.

page 240

"Alexander looked long upon the poor, filthy, shabby, beheaded, half-crazed man" -- I dunno, Alex, I might have led with the Beheaded part. Just sayin', seems the most important part.

page 248

"Alexander thought that it would be inappropriate to express regrets for the incident, since those regrets would not be deeply felt." Alexander, be polite. Don't start snarking with the villain, now.

page 250

"Lydia, Lydia, don't you understand? A man wants to idealize the woman he is to wed. This becomes extremely difficult *when she keeps bloody carping at him.*" Telgrin's breakdown from Eloquent Bro is the best thing ever.

page 260

Since the fight is taking place off screen, it reads most hilariously, with each combatant yelling, "Oh, yeah, that was okay, but what about THIS" followed by just basically a stream of sound effects. It's like reading an anime battle where they would normally shout out their attack names and I'm so into it.

page 266

Can I also add that I find it Entirely Hysterical that this HUGE FLOATING CASTLE is literally pinned into place? With like, a big bobby pin driven into the ground? And that's *it*? This is so impractical on so many levels, Telgrin.

April 3, 2019

page 267

Alexander actually expected Telgrin to win that fight, hah. Good confidence for the Good Team, I guess (Owen's placement on the Good Team being...sketchy, at best, of course).

page 273

See, Graham, Cyril remembers HIS adventuring rope when he goes off on missions. Take notes; it'll help you out in your 2015 voyage.

page 278

Cyril, you stud muffin.

page 283

"How did you find this?" "I got lost." Bab.

April 16, 2019

page 289

Graham Dying bedscenes are like, a favorite staple of this series, innit? And then KQ9 just had to go and take it allllll the way. Hhhh.

page 292

Come on, come on, someone say "a heart is a heavy burden" at Graham. Make this book perfectly complete. No? Okay, fine.

page 293

"I have much to be thankful for. I have escaped the torments that Telgrin thought to inflict on my spirit. I am in my own body again, in my own home, safe and surrounded by family and friends. But what makes me most grateful is that I am able to look upon your face once again, my dear one. For that is everything." Valanice laughed softly, and said, "Rest. You are delirious, I think." My FAVORITE royal couple hhhhhhh.

April 16, 2019 – Finished Reading

Five stars out of five stars. Again.

[polyhexian]

runaway au Hunter being unimpressed with Darius's lack of living-on-the-run skills.

Darius: Hunter, why are you shoving my clothes into a dufflebag?

Hunter: It's a go-bag. You don't have one so I'm making one for you.

Darius: A go-bag.

Hunter: Yeah, in case we need to go.

Darius: Alright, well, I appreciate you not stuffing my good silk shirts into the go-bag--

Hunter: They're impractical.

Darius: --but why are you putting my jewelry in there?

Hunter: Oh! Cuz we could get a lot of money for it!

Darius: Ah. I see.

Hunter is just like, man, Darius can't pickpocket or lockpick, he barely knows how to play hexes hold 'em let alone cheat at it, he IS super amazing at abominations just like Dad said tho so maybe it's different when you're really strong with magic, but still I don't know if he's even all that good at lying or if he could run even a quick con--

Darius: Hunter, I work in politics and have rebellious leanings, I am DEFINITELY good at lying and running cons.

Hunter: Okay, but what names are on your fake IDs so I know what to call you if we need to make a run for it?

Darius doesn't know if he's shocked or amused or sad or frustrated. Every time he uncovers another specifically worrying fact about Hunter's upbringing, knowledge, and skillset, all he can think is "Damn Jasper, you've been living like this??"

Ohhhh the like... Hunter keeps telling him stuff that has jasper like wow. Alright. Until he says something else that shoves the perspective so hard his stomach hurts. I mean like- like interrogating Darius to show him all his fake IDs and tell him his secret identities, haha how silly, this kid really thinks he's like a SPY lol. But then hunter says like- I gotta know so I know what names to ask for at the healers coven, so I know what names to call you when we're hiding from someone, so I can find you when (and not if) we get separated. Or hunter is very serious about building this bug out bag, he's giving a big monologue as he picks stuff up around the house to put in it and he is SOOO serious it's adorable, like watching a ten year old pretend to do taxes or act out their idea of Business Work, but then he says something like- jewelry is great cuz it's easy to sell in an emergency, or and THIS is an emergency blanket! It can help keep all your body heat in when you're cold! Or, like- and you wanna make sure you got a waterproof bivy for your sleeping bag in case it's not safe to pitch a tent! And the reality of that just hits Darius like a brick. Truly: "damn, jasper. You've been living like this?" Only profoundly sad

[inkedroplets]

WIP Tag Game

Rules: post the names of all the files in your wip folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have wips.

tagged by: @crime-wives (Thanks so much!)

A Hero

Fate Has Intervened

You Owe Me a New Desk

A Red-Eye From Gotham

Hope and Devotion

Task Force X

I Flew Here on a Bus (Literally)

They Can't Take That Away From Me

The Slow Knife Cuts the Deepest

Songbird: Nightclub AU

Across Time

Nature Always Wins

I Loved You so Much

Impractical Magic

Devil in Disguise

Doomsday

I always feel super guilty tagging people (I don't know why) @happypugstuff! @scribbling-punk @rustingcat @appropriatelystupid @autisticlenaluthor @kendrene @fazedlight