#imp union

[minion-union-organiser]

I AM NOT AMUUUUuuuuuuuusssseeeed!!!! *Irene the union imp goes hurtling over the horizon*

me: if I become the evil overlord I will never harm my minions

[5 years later]

highly throwable imp: hoohoohee

me: hmm

[buggybuggs]

nefarious, devilish, naughty little diva

[Want a commission like this?]

[annachum]

Vassago visiting IMP's new office be like

( assuming that IMP gets evicted from their old office all thanks to Stella but luckily Stolas soon managed to help get them a better office )

Blitzo : * frantically cleaning up the new office * STOLAS' ELDEST BROTHER IS GONNA VISIT HERE SOON SO WE BETTER KEEP THIS PLACE IN TIP TOP SHAPE!

The rest of IMP : * frantic stress cleaning to Loona's rock Playlist *

Doorbell rings

Blitzo : THERE HE IS! I HOPE HE LIKES IT!

Blitzo gets the door and in comes Stolas with his eldest brother Vassago. Stolas in a more casual purple cashmere sweater and pants wear, while Vassago in a fancy ass black and gold suit with red rose embroidery

Vassago : What a nice place you executioners have! Stolas, you really have outdone yourselves when helping them to move to a new place

Stolas : * chuckles * It's the least I can do, dear brother. I just think they can have better prospects with the company being nearer to Lucifer's Palace

Blitzo : Welcome to the new IMP offices! May I show you are tour, Your Highness?

Vassago : * laughs * Oh, Vassago is fine. I don't have to be so formal like my parents

Blitzo : Alrighty! Come this way, Vassago

So Blitzo and Stolas happily shows around the new features of the new office, which has bigger workplaces and new hires are on the way, and a own common room at the office. The new office is constructed similarly like a fancy corporate office floor with snacks and such

Vassago especially love the welcome brownies Moxxie and Millie made out of hospitality

Later, in a common room

Blitzo : So?! Whaddya think? Your youngest brother is a great interior decor, huh?

Vassago : * sips tea * I never doubted my siblings' interior decor abilities - my parents trained us also in that upon us moving out

Stolas : * nodded *

Vassago : All in all, I am very pleased with the whole turn out! I'm sure there will be more new hires along the way.

Millie : We still have a lot to cover in the expansion of the enterprise but, we owe Stolas for the help, sir. * smiles *

Moxxie : Yeah, and thanks so much for this stamp of approval, sir.

Vassago : * smiles graciously * My parents sent me here to do a review of the new place, to make sure that my brother here had much needed protection from Stella and her sickly crowd. * Vassago and Stolas grimaced at it * And I'd say you all passed with flying colors! I shall send the reports to my parents later on.

Stolas : * beams * Oh, thank you, Vas! I knew you would see the light! * hugs his eldest brother *

Vassago : I may have spent decades handling you and the rest of the siblings' messes but I'll always stand by you all when push comes to shove. * beams *

[imperial-evolution]

Woohoo!! Yippee!!! Hehehehee!!!! <- me on my way to beat my employers to death

[itsmarsss]

Scandalous (Blitzø x Fem!Succubus!Reader x Stolas) [Helluva Boss] pt. 1 - The Prince

How the mighty do fall.

(Getting into a weird three-way situation with an imp and a succubus isn’t exactly considered classy, Stolas.)

pt 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 4 | pt. 5 | 1st bonus | pt. 6 | pt. 7 | pt. 8 | pt. 9 | 2nd bonus

Word count: 1,520

Warnings: I mean. depression. arranged marriage. this part doesn’t contain actual sex only mentions of it but others might idk, me taking myself way too seriously writing this, this has no dialogue but don’t give up on me im actually a pretty dialogue heavy person but this only works if this chapter has no dialogue

If you ever asked Stolas, he’d say he was never one to cause a scene.

If you asked anyone else, they’d say he’s lying.

Stolas had always been fond of a little drama and drawn to a bit of flair, akin to exaggeration and grandeur like no other. Be it in the way he speaks, acts or reacts to hell around him, be it how he expresses his emotions or his thoughts and even his feelings towards others.

Emotions, thoughts, feelings. Stolas was always full of those, ever since he was an ugly, pink, featherless little project of a bird. They have been all-consuming ever since he can remember. And he remembers.

Stolas can recall the confusion in his father’s voice whenever he cried as a kid, as if the action was strange and foreign, unfit for a demon like him.

And perhaps it was.

Stolas remembered many things, and yet he could not recall a single time he had seen his father cry- or show any sort of weakness, for the matter. Paimon was always stern and centered, and Stolas is sure the only thing close to weakness he’s ever expressed was his inability to be more than his status- to be an actual father. He doubted his father would consider that a weakness.

What was fatherhood next to being royal, anyway, right?

It was disconcerting to grow up certain that, between his father and all of his brothers, he was, without a doubt, the weakest. After all, how could he not be? He was scared, of a many things, most of the time. He felt things too deeply in his heart and he worried too much and too often about way too much. He was well aware of all of that.

But, as he grew up, Stolas decided he was fine with it, if it meant he got to genuinely feel things. Because Octavia had come to exist, and he could never in his heart find the willpower to act as cold to her as his own father did to him.

Yes, he decided he was fine with being weak, if that’s what being able to love unconditionally took. He was fine with being weak, if that’s what being loved took.

He may not have loved his father, or even liked him, for the matter. But he promised to himself he’d do anything it took for Octavia to love him.

And how it filled him with pure and utter joy to feel loved for the first time in his life.

He may not have loved Stella, either, but their union had brought him his daughter, and nothing in the entirety of the universe mattered more to him than her. And so he was grateful for their arrangement, after all, despite the bitterness of it all.

With Octavia’s teenage years came the flood, though. Stolas cried himself to sleep almost every single night for years to come as he was reminded of the fact that being grateful for what his marriage brought him was not enough to make him happy to be in the situation in which he found himself, unable to exist as he was inside of his own home without fearing the judgement of a wife who loved him just as much as he loved her - not even a tiny little bit- and unable to shield his daughter from the unhappy family he’d once feared she would have to endure.

Stella was never someone Stolas particularly liked. In fact, he quite disliked her, from the moment he laid eyes on her as his father told him they were betrothed to one another, at much too young of an age.

At first, it surely was purely the hatred for the fact that his fate was tied to her and there was nothing he could do to escape, and the sense of impending doom that came with every year that passed as he knew he grew closer to approaching the day there would be turning back, and watched the time pass as an expectator of his own life, as there was nothing he could really do but comply.

Royal life had its renounces.

When the day came for their marriage to be sealed, the moment finally materializing itself as real instead of bad news he’d try to push away and avoid dwelling into for too long, Stolas promised himself he’d try to get over those feelings and make an effort to know her better. If they would be tied to one another from this moment on, he could at least try to make it all not so miserable.

It was a task set to fail.

When Octavia was conceived, Stolas felt nothing but relief. After all, this entire situation was based purely on business, all-dependent on the birth of an heir. Which meant, in some way, they were a bit more free than before. However much that can be in the situation they found themselves in.

Relief came first, dread came second. At only 19 years old, what did Stolas know of parenting anyway? Logically, he knew this would be happening. Logically, he’d known that for almost a full decade. Logically, that should have been enough for him to be prepared.

But he felt anything but prepared. How was he, who felt lost at all times, who cried at the slightest things, who didn’t ask for all of this, supposed to be a father? What twisted parameters did he have, considering his own?

He only hoped time would ease those feelings.

Throughout the years, he learned those feelings never do leave you, and that parenthood is forever a state of worry. You never truly feel ready- there’s just not much more that you can do than try your best.

To be loved by Octavia was enough. Or… at least it should be, shouldn’t it? Was it selfish, or perhaps even inconsiderate, unfair to her that at times he found himself longing to be loved by someone whose existence wasn’t bound to him? Wishing to know if someone would ever care not because they were betrothed to him and not because they were his own blood, but simply because they liked who he was? Enjoyed his company? Felt genuine attraction towards him?

When thoughts of the sorts consumed him it was hard not to punish himself mentally for thinking such frivolous things, for having such superficial wishes. But it wasn’t hard to figure out where it all stemmed from. After all, when the only partner you have ever had in your entire life hadn’t any say in choosing you, it’s only natural to wonder what it would be like to be with someone who did choose him.

When you’ve had no say in choosing the only partner you’ve ever had in your life, in turn, it’s only ever natural, too, to wonder what it would be like with someone you would have chosen to be with. Someone who excited you, who made you feel things. Stolas didn’t even know what exactly those things were supposed to be, but spent his days longing to feel them nonetheless.

The day Blitzo, someone he hadn’t heard of in decades, was caught trying to sneak into his palace, during the most depressing party ever thrown in all seven rings, Stolas felt excitement for the first time in a long while. It’s almost like his brain had a reaction before he even processed it, like it was stuck repeating the same thing over and over and over: Friend. Friend. Friend.

Sure, Blitzo wasn’t his friend. They hadn’t been friends for, once again, literal decades. In fact, they had only ever been friends for about a day.

But Blitzo was his first ever friend. And you don’t just forget that. Stolas never would, at least.

And in that night they spent together, something in Stolas changed. That night, he felt wanted. For the first time in his life, he felt desired. For the first time in his life, sex wasn’t just business. It wasn’t just an obligation or a means to an end. For the first time in his life, sex was fun.

He knew it was supposed to be fun. He knew it was fun for most people. He had just stopped hoping it would ever be fun for him.

And, sure, he also knew what they did was wrong. But he couldn’t get himself to care as much as he probably should have, because, truth be told, Stella could pretend to have been hurt by it however much she wanted, but they both knew she never really was.

“That was the sound of a fucking divorce!”

A couple hours later, sitting on his bed in shock, he could still barely believe he had really just done what he did- what they should have done so long ago- and Stolas just started laughing to himself. The more he laughed, the harder it was to stop. He knew he just had to be like a maniac like that, but couldn’t possibly get himself to care, because, for only a split second did the thought of not being supposed to let his servants see him in that state pass through his mind, but it only made him laugh harder.

He’d just announced his divorce to the wife he’d been set to marry since birth, can’t get much more scandalous than that.

A/N: would you believe me if i said this started as an idea for what was supposed to be only a funny silly little oneshot with dick jokes and public embarrassment?

Requests for Blitzø and Blitzø x Stolas are open! I’m also SO hyperfixated on this show rn so if y’all wanna chat abt hcs or this series be my guest I’d be happy to talk and i don’t bite unless asked nicely luv y’all <3

[vagabond-umlaut]

it's easy to ferry souls, not carry them

deep down in the realm of the netherworlds, there exists a rower who transports deceased souls from the land of living to the land of dead-

and occasionally lends an ear and a hand, in the event of yet another collision between their weary queen and her just as cheery suitor...

[uraume deserves a raise.]

▸gojo satoru x fem!reader; the tale of kore!gojo & hades!reader w a guest appearance by charon!uraume; uraume is a very nice parental figure to you [ooc!uraume but ehh]; the reader is honestly so sweet and hot-tempered...; the cutest doggy cerberus too is there!!!!; gojo satoru must be his own warning...; uraume does not like gojo [no parent [blood-related or not] actually wld]; fire hazards; 2k wc

▸ i've nvr read percy jackson and wtv i wrote here is based on my shaky knowledge of greek myths and stuff 😁😁 anyways, this header's from pinterest, these dividers are by @benkeibear and the characters used ain't mine. pls do not plagiarize, translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

▸ belongs to series 'wreaths of asphodel' – same universe as the work 'hey, where is the pomegranate tree?' — but you can treat this as a stand-alone fic if you wanna!

"why is kore so set on marrying me, uraume?"

it isn't the ask itself which causes the rower to nearly lose grip of their oar– but the way it is spoken: soft, solemn and faintly tense. they look away from the endless expanse of the styx before, to find you staring at your reflection in the inky waters, features unnaturally crumpled.

uraume holds back a frown. "has her majesty considered asking the god the same?"

"i have asked him," you mumble, "but i did not receive any conclusive answer in return. the imp was being too vague– must be a trait learnt from those shifty nymphs always sticking to his side."

if your faithful follower detects anything except dislike in your words, they make no mention of it. merely humming as they continue to row the boat, "and may this servant know the question her majesty asked the god?"

"two," you mumble even more clumsily now; they take a beat to grasp it, too concerned by the way you drape yourself over the edge, nearly falling into the water as you say, "i asked him two questions— one, if he loves me; two, if he wants to have children should we get married."

shock must not be uraume's first reaction to these queries, yet it is— and for a moment, it isn't you sitting there anymore.

instead, it is a little girl, no older than seven or eight years, cherubic face fixed in a look of deep concentration and fascination while the rower narrates to her stories from times millennia ago–

only for the child to morph into a young lady– no, goddess– the very next beat... slouched under a regal cloak too heavy for her shoulders, under a royal crown too large for her head... that sweet innocence of childhood nothing but traces now, having been withered by the foul, dirty politics of those damned deities high up on that mountain—

"what answers did the olympian offer her majesty?"

"he said he would love me and sire my children if that is what i want— i asked if he wished anything out of our union— he said all he wanted is to be my husband–"

something between a frustrated sigh and an exhausted scoff erupts from you, becoming an opaque fog the moment it hits the frigid air of the underworld. uraume plucks the oar out the water to come sit next to you, letting the boat be driven by magic.

"you're worried," they state, forgoing all formalities in favour of giving you some much-needed comfort. you never much cared for stations anyways, quite unlike your elder brother, the former king.

"an unfamiliar friend poses more risk than a familiar enemy, uraume," you mutter, resting your head on their shoulder, "why do you think kore wishes to marry me so much, if not out of love or the prospect of the powerful offsprings we might beget?"

"marriage is not solely for love or for procreation," the rower starts to explain, mildly amused before it grows into sympathy at your baffled expression.

ah, they muse fondly, not unlike a parent watching their child witness the world seemingly the first time ever since they learnt to walk, you who presides over something as profound as death yet knows not of the trivialities of life...

"it can also be for many other reasons like–"

the remainder of the words skitter away from uraume— cerberus is playing with gojo.

the fierce guard of the netherworlds, the three-headed hound, loyal and dutiful to a fault: hades' dearest canine companion is frolicking with the god of life in a green meadow, that most certainly was not there so close to the stygian marsh, when they last—

"gojo is laughing," your remark draws them away from their musings, only to find a changed shadow over your countenance— pensive yet not thinking at all; almost as if you too are floating in the stale air of your kingdom akin the soft flower petals...

another ring of raucous laughter pierces the silence, mingled with a delighted series of barks— cerberus is busy licking gojo's face now, the olympian reduced to a puddle of giggles as he scratches behind the dog's ears.

his happiness so clear in the stretch of his grin and the crinkle of his eyes, very much the jarring contrast to the last time—

oh. oh, oh, oh–

"escape," the word leaves uraume in a sudden moment of realisation, as quiet as a breath but loud enough for you to whip your head back to face them, confusion engraved into your scowl. "escape?? what is that supposed to mean, eh?"

the rower feels their lips lift into an infrequent smile. "the god of life wishes to marry you to escape— from his mother, or from his many suitors, or perhaps from mount olympus itself."

"wha– how– hah," you breathe out a disbelieving little huff, "that is simply ridiculous. have you even heard yourself? that is ridiculous."

used to such resistance from yourself, even more from your brother, they move to state their points, only to beaten by you as you persist to speak.

"no one in their right mind will decide to come live in the underworld, no matter how overbearing their mother or insistent their suitors are. have you seen this place? it's too, too unlike the lushness of the earth or the grandeur of the heavens he has experienced. and–" you add, a harsh laugh accompanying it. "gojo satoru is a god. a fish might leave the water— but a god never steps a voluntary foot down that horrible mountain. never."

"but the olympian never truly lived on mount olympus," uraume says once they're sure you've completed your tirade, "and you are a goddess as well. why do you speak so ill of the heavens then?"

"why?" you echo the word. they nod, hoping you take the bait they've intended for you. you do.

"why, because that place is nothing but a shining apple with a rotten core!! everything is polished marble and glittering gold there. people constantly wave at each other, lavishing smiles and praises like there is no tomorrow. everything is so warm and bright— what a bunch of lies and liars!"

familiar fire burns in your aura, the immense heat making the waters erupt into boiling— uraume uses their powers to cool the river down, lest anything disturbs you.

you're too far gone in your rage to be shaken, however, continuing:

"but it never can hide the grime and dirt accrued beneath such shine and sheen. nor the vicious minds and crooked hearts of those deities up above– what lame excuses of gods and goddesses, hah. and you might think me to prefer the light and warmth up there— you will be sorely wrong, my dear uraume!! i much prefer the genuine darkness and frigidity of my beloved kingdom to the faux comfort of the awful mount olympus—"

"is there no possibility the god of life too despises mount olympus for these same reasons, milady?"

you open your mouth and close it, then open it again to let out a very aggrieved whine– momentarily transporting uraume to your younger days. the rower merely chuckles when you punch their arm lightly.

"you're the worst, uraume," you cry, getting up and moving to sit on the other end of the boat. the rower too rises but only to resume rowing the boat by the oar.

"you never spoke this way when sukuna was the ruler— only because his baby sister is the ruler now, and you think she is very stupid—"

"as much as i respect and revere lord sukuna, he wasn't one to listen to anyone else," uraume interrupts gently, "you do, though– which is why i spent so much time telling you this. i hope you did not mind."

"hey, no," you immediately wave away their concern with a wide grin, eliciting a smaller one from the latter, "i could never..."

another peal of laughter and barks rings through the otherwise-quiet. you abruptly trail off, the same conflicting expression from before on your face yet again. though not without a spark in your eyes, uraume notes, almost as if you're slowly learning how to solve the puzzle who is repeatedly offering himself to you.

uraume keeps the silence you initiate, choosing to row the boat while you keep staring at the assortment of hues near the stygian marsh...

until you call their name and declare, an odd firmness in your smile, "well then, it is decided. i shall allow gojo to stay here for as long as the god so wishes to, escaping whatever or whoever he is escaping. and i shall protect him from the latter, should it ever come for him."

a beat. your smile falls into something graver. "would it be better if i swore by the dread water of styx, uraume?"

"uh, um," the rower finds themselves at a loss of words, the first time in seemingly forever, and they have been around since titanomachy– but before they can recover themselves enough to formulate a proper reply, a giggly voice joins in—

"well, if my rose does that, i would consider myself the most blessed amongst all mortals and immortals!"

— and the waters surrounding the boat shoot upwards in a scathing geyser-like jet and steam— the ferocious queen of the netherworlds visibly torn between remorse and terror, as they offer uraume a stiff nod and gojo a horrified look, before vanishing in a wisp of fog.

the boiling waters of the river styx calm down only after a twenty-minute-long struggle by uraume, joined at the very end by gojo.

the latter looks positively delighted, when the former collapses to the bottom of the boat, exhausted beyond belief. "hey, charon. was that a result of your queen getting flustered by me, huh?"

yes, it was. it very much was, the sentences nearly slip past the tired rower's crumbling defences... until it hits them– who they serve, and who they don't.

uraume decides to throw back a glare and a lie. "her majesty was not flustered, lord kore. she was enraged at how you invaded the privacy of her weekly boat ride, intended to make her relax."

"oh, puh-lease," the god makes a face. the rower is certain he would have been punished in the pits of tartarus for all eternity, then some more were he to pursue you this way during your brother's reign, let alone disrespect you thus.

ignorant and insolent, he continues, "in few days time, i'll be allowed into the privacy of her living quarters; what is the privacy of her boat th—"

"you're lucky you did not make such outrageous remarks in front of the queen," uraume cuts him off, none too kindly nor gently, "if you did, her majesty would have certainly burnt you along with the boat to a crisp–"

"i know," comes the defeated reply within the instant. and while gojo is still not in uraume's good graces, the latter decides to notch him a level higher, considering the god of life accepts their queen's powers.

not many do.

he strikes a pathetically pitiful figure, uraume reckons, seeing him sit then slouch on the bench. "was she serious when she said she would protect me?"

your loyal subject nods, certain and solemn. "yes, she was. the queen is never careless when it comes to making promises."

"oh, that's reassuring," gojo says quietly— only to recline even further in the very next beat– an anguished, grating wail tearing from him to the stifling silence looming near the stygian marsh. uraume wonders if it is worth it to steer the boat towards acheron... then push him into its waters of woe...

they decide against it on catching the desperation worn by the god.

for all it is, it might nothing more than a ploy. yet something tugs at their mind to pause and listen when gojo howls, "why does my rose always scurry away after tilting my world on its axis? why does your queen always torment me like this, charon?"

uraume stares pensively at their face in the sacred waters of styx for a while. then heaves a mighty sigh.

certain, this exchange between the goddess of the dead and the god of life will impact not only your and gojo's respective worlds— but the general world and everyone else in it, as well.

did you know, in the actual greek myths, persephone was never called so before her marriage to hades? she got it only after, w the name meaning "bringer of death". her initial name was kore, referring to her being a maiden & the spring goddess.

the river styx was called the "dread river of oath" by homer– in both the iliad and the odyssey [greek epic poems], swearing by its waters is the "greatest and most dread oath for the blessed gods" -> this shows how serious the reader is towards ensuring gojo's safety and freedom, and how deeply this affects gojo as well [source: wiki 😇]

also: the reader is totally ready to jump into the water to swim away when she realises gojo was listening in on her conversations- but then she remembers she can js vanish away and so she does js tht— the queen of the underworld, and of escaping, hehe

also also: the reader is slightly jealous when she is talking of the shifty nymphs always sticking to gojo's side. [uraume identifies it; you think it is js your usual dislike to such frivolous things and ppl as flowers and nymphs etc.] [hades is emo imho 😊]

▸ masterlist

[batboyblog]

hey thanks for not being super doomer over these anti-trans bills. i kept on seeing so many people being defeated over them and it messed up my mental health for a while, like nothing could be done. but you did bring up some good points and shed some light onto people who are actively fighting for us so i thank you again

The queer movement, in the US any ways, has always been cyclical, we make big gains and push forward, then there's a super scary backlash. We're right now at the hight of a really scary backlash thats focused on trans people in particular but is anti-queer more generally. It's intense but its important to remember these backlashes don't generally last very long, they are scary, but each time they've happened, the mid to late 1970s, the 1980s, the early 2000s, the tide has gone out and gay rights, LGBT rights, and society's acceptance of LGBT people has been farther along than before they have never ever managed to turn us back in the years since Stonewall.

And as intense and scary as this is in some ways it's better than last time, when I was a gay teenager. in those days... in 2004 and 2008 the Democrats running for President were uniformly against gay marriage (the big issue of that time) they were trying to get us to settle for the not marriage alternative of civil unions. Only a handful of Congresspeople (some of them gay themselves) in DEEP! blue districts dared to support gay marriage outright. Today the Democratic Party is the most pro-LGBT major political party in the world, you had the President and every Democrat of any note making statements for TDOV a few days ago and you're not seeing even red state Democrats back down and agree to be "a little transphobic" for votes. It felt a lot more lonely last time when it was us and a handful of allies fighting the backlash with most of the Democratic Party on the side lines handwringing and saying "well can't you wait?"

any ways this movement is and will always be a struggle, the rights we've won, the acceptance we've received has never just been given, it's been won, through hard work. Everyone has to dedicate themselves to work in their corner of the earth to the best of their abilities and to push themselves past what they think they can do. That means hooking up with LGBT rights groups on the ground to protest, to rally, to try to support and comfort those queer people who are down and out in whatever way right now, it means digging deep and having hard and awkward conversations with the people in your life, if you're gay or trans or whatever and you got that one aunt/uncle/cousin/whoever in your life that loves you to bits but you know still votes Republican and you just don't bring it up because you don't want to hurt the relationship... have the talk keep having the talk as many times as you need to. Tell your grandparents if they don't know, tell your parents (if its safe or if you don't need their money any more) tell co-workers who don't know etc, they vote for us 2 to 1 if they know they know one of us. Finally register to vote, make sure all your friends particularly if you're young are registered and vote, vote in every election. Trust me it's AMAZINGLY easy to find the email of candidates for school board or city council and it's amazingly easy to ask questions. Last election I emailed every school board candidate about Holocaust education, and the state rep candidate about trans rights, she wrote me back a lovely note and mailed be a sticker she'd picked up from a trans rights group. It's amazingly easy to get involved, I volunteered with my local democrats for one election and they offered me the #3 spot in their local party, I have the phone numbers of my state rep and state senator without trying really, you can get in the room with these people, with candidates for governor, congress, I have my picture with 3 US Presidents? its not hard to do, and you can use chances like that to talk to them and show them your humanity and leave an impression that really matters in the long run.

sorry to RAMBLE but it's important that everyone do their part, pick a little something, a project to push this thing forward, people doom scrolling, particularly posting about how its hopeless does not help, posting in general doesn't help much even if its not doomerism, I think in the years after the anti-gay marriage Bush backlash we got very online and we got very "progress just happens" and a lot of people fell out of the habit or came of age without the habit of protest and without a local queer community or local progressive community and its very important in the face of this to find or build those and also understand in some places its gonna be years of work to get where we want to go, but we will and it'll be worth all the work.

[bloop-bl00p]

My issue with the Hellaverse rulers

We all know the story of Lucifer causing a war in Heaven due to his hatred of mankind, losing and taking a quarter of the angels with him. Those Fallen Angels became the rulers of Hell, essentially torturing the sinners and going to Earth to tempt us or just chill out and give us math lessons (I’m not joking, some do when summoned.) Not in Viv’s Hell though, they were no war so where do the other demons come from? How did these demons manage to harvest such great powers, powers that can give them access to Earth and outrank the lower class? You can theorize that the Seven Deadly Sins were born from the sin of humans or some shit but that’s headcannon territory and this does not explain what created the Goetia. Are we supposed to believe that the second Lucifer and Lilith fell everyone was there to greet them with flowers and a little flag saying “Congratulations! You fucked up but you get a new kingdom!”

Talking about the Goetia…

How exactly do they work here? The Arc Goetia is listed in a book known as the Lesser Keys of Solomon. Their section contains detailed information about 72 demons and how to summon them, these demons were Fallen Angels. A random King named Solomon who appeared to be a master of witchcraft received a ring from an angel that gave him authority over demons and he used them to build temples.

And then you have the Helluva Boss version, with a Stolas born in Hell, who is at least 35. Why do they even exist in this world? The whole thing with the Goetia is that they were demons at the service of King Solomon around 970 to 931 BCE.

You also have those characters who are classified as such but those do not appear in the book like Stella who’s Andrealphus’s sister and who are their parents you ask? Figure it out. But fair enough maybe they do something that is specific to them like I don’t know:

[Context: Stolas wanted Blizø to kill said a candidate who was causing trouble for his associate.]

Ah! So the Goetia mission is essentially to make life worse on Earth using lower species like imps to do their binding. I would have hoped but��� it’s a screenshot from the pilots which isn’t canon anymore. And til now, we have no indication that this is what the Goetia does in the cannon.

Stolas is immortal why does he need to have a child? Maybe it’s for other Goetia duties that will never be addressed in the shows but he’s the only character who is visibly shown to be forced into a marriage. Paimon clearly doesn't care if you are gay, asexual, or whatever if he wants you to make a baby you will make a baby. So naturally Andrealphus will have a wife, right? He’s only a duke and his sister got married to a Prince seemingly to alleviate their family so shouldn’t he marry a Princess or something like that, his parents would certainly pressure him to do so. And since Stolas needs an heir despite being immortal, wouldn’t he need one too?

[Context: God the inconsistency's gonna kill me. This is Stella’s party in ep1 of season 2 and you can see two men dancing together.]

Stolas could have been openly gay since the beginning, so what prevented him from divorcing Stella the second Octavia was born? The girl would have been too young to remember her mother and if she asked questions he could have just explained to her that Stella wasn’t a good person.

“But he played along so she could have a normal childhood.”

That would have been a great excuse if Stella did the same thing.

This woman literally threw their butler at her husband the second she learned he cheated on her with an imps not caring that her daughter was there! Stella is quick to anger and will most likely choose physical violence when she’s upset. How did Stolas though that THIS was a normal childhood for Via?!! And it’s not like he was trapped in the marriage they divorced quite easily… wait a minute…

Does Viv even understand the concept of arranged marriages?! Usually, both families benefit from the union (financially, religiously, and other), but few result in divorce due to the massive social pressure caused by the two families and the constant control and influence the parents have on their children. Realistically speaking, Paimon would have threatened Stolas for trying to leave Stella because there’s no way he married his immortal son just to get a new kid in the family.

Yet, it still happened without any complication and Stella left his castle. So where’s Octavia?! She’s his heir! He’s supposed to learn her fairy dust and star magic or some shit, he should automatically get full custody of the child! We don't even know what the girl's relationship with her mother is but considering Stella is framed as a psychopath, I wouldn't want my kid to stay with her EVEN for vacation, Octavia is 17 she saw her mother throwing a tantrum once I think she’ll understand why her father doesn't want her near Stella.

[second-wife-playbook]

@nebula-gaster

Coronis hung to the curtains in the main ballroom of the estate, and watched.

Watching was all a little girl her age could do. Stella was twelve and already showing off her dancing lessons during parties, and Andrealphus was fourteen, speaking in lengthy terms on his studies in geometry and mathematics, the basis of his education as a scholar and future noble already advanced for a boy his age. Coronis in comparison, was still too childish. She was still being taught the airs and graces, but her teacher often lamented that she was still too demure to be truly "noble".

Her mother frowned at such descriptions, and when Coronis saw her face twisted in disapproval, she had learned to hide away. The ballroom was busy and crowded as it was. After all. Grandfather Forneas was visiting.

When Coronis saw her grandfather for the first time, he was led in by two tall imps by the arms, gently guided to a cushioned chair. She had never seen an "old" looking Goetia before him. His dark feathers were speckled with grays, his eyes sagging and glazed over. And stranger still, he kept murmuring under his breath. She'd heard from Stella that he'd been a "nutcase" for centuries.

Mostly, Coronis thought he was simply frail.

So her family glided and presented themselves with grace. What a happy union they were, looking after their sickly grandfather, with such excellent children. They did not mind the missing third, shying away in the corner, and watching with her big, scared eyes.

[awkwardandeccentric]

I do hope Season 3 goes a little more into how the Goetia specifically view imps.

We know they’re not literal slaves, but they’re also treated pretty poorly (literally used as furniture) and I doubt they have any kind of labor unions or worker protections. And I don’t think Viv, Brandon, and Alex would ever write a romance story with a slave owner being the titular love interest to an oppressed minority, the whole furniture thing (particularly in the restaurant in Western Energy)…it gives me some pause. You know?

[chaifootsteps]

on the topic of the imp butler/background character to the anon asking if they were going to do anything with them

I think the answer is a pretty sure no, to be honest and that's for one simple reason

Viv doesn't think of them as characters in their own right. They're just props for the ruling class to throw around or use as stress balls, then be ignored. The most the show has ever cared about the imp butler is when he got to blow off some steam at Ozzie's with a table full of honeys in episode 7, the episode after which quality writing in the show basically became nonexistent.

like when The Circus opened I immediately noticed baby Stolas has had imp servants since birth and I assumed the story would care about how this informs his 'relationship' with Blitzo. the second half put paid to that notion by having Stolas bow to Blitzo as a kid, even though nothing in his upbringing would have encouraged him to be that nice towards the race who literally dress him every day, whilst quietly trying to sweep examples of him being classist from s1 under the rug (and failing, given he still hasn't cared to learn about any of Blitzo's colleagues and calls the imp lawyer 'little one' in the smuggest most punchable way possible).

but the writers just trying to insist Stolas is better than Stella doesn't work when they can't be bothered to write him that way and the evidence of an unequal class system is literally living in his house, doing his laundry and drawing his baths while Stolas has yet another crying meltdown

tl:dr but I'm still here for an alt ending where the servants team up to make a union and kick out both Stolas and Stella (or ideally get Blitzo involved to murder Stolas in the night). Then Blitzo and Striker take over the palace and make it into a stop in centre where other imps can stay while the two of them raise horses, the end

Ooh, an ending where the servants pool what limited funds Stolas and Stella probably pay them to hire I.M.P. to take out both would be amazing, like genuinely something I would have expected from this show back when I thought it was good.

Also 10/10 for the addition of BlitzStrike, always a perfect gilding to the lily.

[buggybuggs]

SLEEPOVER TIME!!

[worst-fictional-places-to-work]

The contestants are set!

With 100 responses, i unfortunately could not include everything <//3. However, there will be 52 contestants as listed bellow, and 26 polls for the first round!

I will begin the polls shortly, may the worst place win!

PLACE: The Stanley parable company place MEDIA: the stanely parable

VS

PLACE: Papa's Pizzeria MEDIA: Papa's Pizzeria

PLACE: Hazbin hotel MEDIA:Hazbin hotel

VS

PLACE: VVV MEDIA: Hazbin hotel

PLACE: Altobuck Hospital MEDIA: Blackout Hospital

VS

PLACE: Aether West Academy MEDIA: Here For Sweet Hearts

PLACE: Jovial Playground MEDIA: Jovial Playground - Roblox

VS

PLACE: Glorp N Go MEDIA: Regretevator - Roblox

PLACE: The BAU (the behavioral analysis unit) MEDIA: criminal minds

VS

PLACE: Princeton plainsboro teaching hospital MEDIA: House m.d.

PLACE: Global Relief Effort (GRE) MEDIA: Dying Light/Dying Light 2

VS

PLACE: IMC (Interstellar Manufacturing Corporation) MEDIA: Titanfall 2

PLACE: JCJenson MEDIA: Murder Drones

VS

PLACE: The Company MEDIA: Lethal Company

PLACE: Rizzo’s MEDIA: Outer Worlds

VS

PLACE: The Halcyon Corporation MEDIA: Outer Worlds

PLACE: Arkham Asylum MEDIA: DCU

VS

PLACE: Lexcorp MEDIA: Superman comics/tv shows/movies

PLACE: StrexCorp MEDIA: Welcome to Night Vale

VS

PLACE: Night Vale Community Radio MEDIA: Welcome to Nightvale

PLACE: Gent corporation MEDIA: BATDR

VS

PLACE: Joey Drew Studios MEDIA: Bendy And The Ink Machine

PLACE: Archeological expedition funded by Whitmore Industries/Preston Whitmore MEDIA: Atlantis the Lost Empire

VS

PLACE: Clovis Bray / Braytech MEDIA: Deatiny 2

PLACE: Engineering on the USS Enterprise NCC-1701 MEDIA: Star Trek: The Original Series (TOS)

VS

PLACE: Discovery One MEDIA: 2001 A Space Odyssey

PLACE: Lobotomy Corporation MEDIA: Lobotomy Corporation (the game)

VS

PLACE: The Combine Overwatch MEDIA: Half Life

PLACE: Lumon MEDIA: Severance

VS

PLACE: I.R.I.S. MEDIA: Anomaly Found - Chase Brody by Jacksepticeye on Youtube

PLACE: hero association MEDIA: one punch man

VS

PLACE: Public Safety Devil Hunters MEDIA: Chainsaw Man

PLACE: Princess Peach's Royal Guard MEDIA: Super Mario Bros.

VS

PLACE: Mettatons restaurant MEDIA: Undertale

PLACE: Aether foundation MEDIA: Pokemon

VS

PLACE: The Fatui MEDIA: Genshin Impact

PLACE: Goddard Futuristics MEDIA: Wolf 359 (podcast)

VS

PLACE: The Magnus Institute MEDIA: The Magnus Archives

PLACE: D.D.D MEDIA: That’s not my neighbor

VS

PLACE: Grand Army of the Republic MEDIA: Star Wars (Attack of the Clones to Revenge of the Sith era)

PLACE: Coven Communications Research and Power (CCRP) MEDIA: The hatchetfield series (starkid)

VS

PLACE: ASU-NARO MEDIA: yttd (Your Turn to Die - Death Game by Majority)

PLACE: Fairy godmother's factory MEDIA: Shrek 2

VS

PLACE: COGs incorporated MEDIA: Disney’s Toontown

PLACE: Fazbender Entertainment MEDIA: The Dayshift At Freddy's series

VS

PLACE: Freddy Fazbear's Mega Pizzaplex MEDIA: Five nights at freddy's

PLACE: UAC (Union Aerospace Corporation) MEDIA: doom

VS

PLACE: Immediate Murder Professionals (IMP) MEDIA: Helluva Boss

PLACE: S.C.P. Foundation MEDIA: S.C.P. Foundation

VS

PLACE: Aperture science MEDIA: Portal

PLACE: GrizzCo MEDIA: Splatoon

VS

PLACE: Mystery Flesh Pit National Park MEDIA: Mystery Flesh Pit National Park

[blairelythere]

how many 5 year olds could you take in a fight at once. all participants unarmed.

Like Kobolds that don't know any better, I will unionize the 5 year olds and turn them to your borders instead. I'll give them pixie stix, matches, sharp objects, and those wiffle ball bats that are a little too hard for kids.

What now, Smore? How are you going to defeat my army of Paw Patrol-obsessed, sugar-rushed imps?

[snowfoxchina]

Happy Father's Day!

*First left: Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf. Big Big Wolf is a good husband and father. He always has a tolerant attitude towards his wife Red Wolf. He also loves his son Xiao Huihui very much and is an inventor.

*Second from left: Bluey, Bandit, is an archaeologist who adores his wife Chilli and his daughters and does his best to keep up with Bluey and Bingo's games, whether that means dressing up, turning into a robot, or starting from a tickle Survive the crab attack.

*Third from left: Undertale, Asgore, is the ruler of the underground world, its inhabitants, and monsters. He is Toriel's ex-husband, Asriel Dreemurr's father, and Chara's adoptive father. is a kind, quiet but optimistic monster who loves gardening, goldenrod tea, and Toriel's butterscotch pie.

*Fourth from right: Hollow Knight, The Pale King, is a superior creature and the past king of Hallownest. In order to solve the infection, the Pale King plans to use the vessel seal, the offspring of the union of the Pale King and the White Lady.

*Third from right: Helluvu Boss, Blitz∅, from the Circle of Greed, is the adoptive father of the hellhound Loona, and is considered one of the most trustworthy and "go-to" assassins in Hell. He's a seemingly rude, conceited man, but is actually a self-doubting boss who seeks to prove that Imps are just as capable as other demons.

*Second from right: Helluva Boss, Stolas, is a Goetic Hell Prince who is Octavia's father and Stella's husband. The first impression is of a regal, ostentatious man, but also a flamboyant, dramatic, eccentric, often dazzling man, very lonely, but with a romantic and explicit side, and he is also very tender towards those he cares about. ,Educated.

*Right: Hazbin Hotel, Lucifer, Charlie Morningstar's father and Lilith's estranged husband. He is the ruler of all hell and one of the Seven Deadly Sins. He has a flamboyant and dramatic personality, switching between silly and exaggerated, clumsy and melancholic. He was an idealistic dreamer, but after being separated from Lilith, he fell into isolation and fell into depression.

[trashogram]

Little Octavia slowly realizing her parents can’t stand each other. She starts to feel their hostile energy whenever they’re in the same room together and it upsets her. It’s frightening. She can’t stop hearing their screaming matches echoing down the hall. She tried to stop them once, running in with tears streaming down her face. The crying only made them more vicious toward each other, blaming each other for upsetting her.

Little Octavia becoming meek and docile, leaving behind her innocence just to pacify her parents and keep them from being toxic to each other because it’s scary and makes her tummy hurt. She doesn’t know it but she’s developed an anxiety disorder.

Octavia listening to her mother’s ranting and raving about how awful Stolas is, and they bond through a common enemy whenever he’s not around. Octavia soothes her father as he mourns his own life and bitterly jabs at Stella. Octavia never stops smiling even when it hurts. She’s the victim of parentification and if she isn’t helpful, the guilt and shame will eat at her mercilessly.

Octavia begins to feel exhausted every day despite getting enough sleep. The thought of another day drains her so much that she can barely get out of bed. Her parents show some concern, but are too wrapped up in themselves to be there for her for very long.

Octavia hates the way her parents treat their staff. Everyone is so much smaller than her parents and their friends. Octavia is so much smaller. She starts to feel sick when an imp is tossed aside like trash, or a Hellhound protecting them goes unacknowledged. Why are they so thoughtlessly cruel?

Nothing tastes good anymore. Octavia always feels nauseous, and has for years. She would prefer not to eat, or even drink sometimes. She just wants to stay in her room with the lights off and the curtains drawn. She wants the music to drown out her racing thoughts and the memories that creep up like ivy.

Octavia feels like daggers are piercing through her heart even though Stolas hasn’t said anything, just looks dismayed. She’s tried this grimoire spell several times now and it’s not working. The magic doesn’t flow from her claws like it does for her father. His reassuring smile doesn’t reach his eyes when he tells her that it’s okay.

Octavia fights the tears that threaten to fall as her mother huffs disappointedly when she stumbles through her curtsies and her dances with other Goetia lords and ladies. Stella waves it off and kisses Via’s cheeks later, but her affection is half-hearted and mired in discontent.

Via’s peers give her funny looks when she speaks, because she’s been silent and standing at the edge of the group like a haunting specter all this time. She makes a tiny mistake and the embarrassment is so strong that she can feel panic invading her lungs.

Octavia cries quietly in her room. A thought comes in the midst of her self-loathing — she wouldn’t be so stupid and incompetent if her parents taught her how to do these things instead of expecting her to know it all already.

Octavia cries harder, ashamed of herself.

Her father is caught sleeping with another man and Octavia feels her heart stop. She knows that Stolas and Stella can’t stand each other, but it’s still a shock. The betrayal feels like a physical blow, like Octavia stood shaking with this household on her shoulders all this time and now it’s crashing down. Everything splinters and scatters, glass shatters, and the rot in the walls and hiding underneath the floor starts to reveal itself.

Her parents are divorcing. Her father is happy for the first time since Octavia can remember, and her mother is sulking but still has her machinations. They stomp on the remains of the house she tried so hard to keep together as they go their separate ways.

Octavia feels something deep inside of her break as her father shouts that she is the only reason that Stolas and Stella have remained in a loveless union. She is the reason that they were forced to be together, miserable.

Octavia thinks that if she didn’t exist, none of this would have happened.

She’s numb everyday. Hell keeps burning, but Octavia can’t care. Her parents pick up on the change when she can no longer pretend to agree with them or feed into their delusions. Their confusion, their anger, their concern — it can’t hurt her anymore. She’s dead inside.

Little things get past the murky glass that contains her. She looks at her mother one day and thinks ‘I can’t stand you’. She listens to her father prattle on and thinks ‘you’re not capable of love’.

There’s a date on the calendar that was marked with a promise long ago. Octavia blacks it out before she tears the calendar into pieces that she then sends flying out the window. She only needs the bag in her closet with her whole life inside. It won’t stir any attention when she leaves and never comes back.