#im. not looking at that overdue one i cant see it

[naenaex0xx]

I just wanna go back to sleep..

[todayisafridaynight]

Anon... It's not that Masato/Aoki has muscle. He's just 6,1 and snap is being game accurate now.

now im being game accurate 😩

[aakaneeee]

I've had my drabble, now it's time for actual theories and parallels since I haven't done that in a while and it's long overdue

first of all, I love to see Alien Stage art slowly but surely falling into the obvious eerie side.

I have a lot to say about all of these, but I specifically want to focus on Luka for this.

When I first saw the branding, I wondered why it was there. I was confused, because I expected it to be on the heart (which was also proven to be false in the 2nd anniversary pop up store).

then, I looked closer: left hip.

there are actually a lot of stuff to associate with his branding (except it looking slutty IM SORRY YALL I CANT HELP MYSELF)

The left hip is also the place where horses are branded. Specifically, pedigree horses. Again, not only does it show possession, but also him being superior to others.

For men, that specific area is one of the most painful. (insert tattoo pain chart)

it might seem like it's on yellow since it's just a little lower than the belly button, but 1. The belly button on this chart is really high and 2. It could just be perspective, and it'd make a lot of sense for him to be branded in the most painful way possible. doesn't that sound heperu to you?

3. he isn't under anesthesia. even mizi, who had a "least pain" area, seemed to be under anesthesia. but no, he wasn't. this leads me to my next point:

4. We know Heperu thinks the only way to make a good pet is fear. So, what if he specifically chose that area, so Luka could actively see, and even have to hold his shirt up himself? He wants him to fear, and he wants him to know who he belongs to. It seems he really doesn't have limits in showing that.

Okay, those are the stuff I've noticed about this, but now I have a parallel.

This might be a little bit of a reach so take it with a grain of salt!!

Ivan's branding is on his wrist: a secure, hidden place, where others wouldn't be able to see it, as if he actually had more freedom than other humans, being seen more as a business partner than like a pet.

Youd think Luka is the same, afterall, his branding is on his hip, and we didn't see anyone wearing crop tops and low rise pants yet.

No, but all of his outfits have an open back and a cut in the front.

Considering the pacing of his songs, and the turns he made in Round 5, we could possibly imagine that the material would move away, and it would show his branding, atleast a little bit. Like a silent reminder, both for Luka and for the audience, that he is not his own person, but someone who is owned. It feels like Heperu is so prideful that he wants to take merit for Luka's voice, as if taking advantage of an actual condition he has was what brought him up in the charts, and that Luka's work is equal to nothing, because he did everything. That's what Heperu thinks, and that's what he wants the audience to think, as well.

Another perfect example of this is the photo next to the branding.

Taking Sua's photo, we can see the signatures or scribbles are darker, and even though crazier, they still make her the center of it, while still maintaining some color.

For Luka, the backround is blank. Just grey. He doesn't have the teal that Sua had, or even a light yellow to show light. More importantly, the signatures are all over him. Showing that he is a prized possession, a trophy, that doesn't actually have anything of his own, that is completely under his owner and his fans, despite him supposedly having more 'freedom' than other pets because he already won a season. (This freedom being an obvious lie.)

Sua is looking left. Luka is directly facing the camera, but you can barely even tell, his eyes are covered by his hair.

Again, another small reach, but we know he doesn't really enjoy bright lights. (sweet dream as proof)

I was wondering if this could be even more proof of him having even more conditions than what they've let on.

Specifically, Leukocoria.

Leukocoria represents your pupil shining white or grayish-yellow instead of red, and it signals grave damage inside the eye.

(Photo from Google, don't sue me)

It looks very close to Luka's pupils, right?

there are also these two official arts in which he's wearing glasses.

they seem to be quite thin, so whatever the reason for him wearing them is not that bad.

so i was wondering: could it be a case of cataract?

HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT

his eyes are a very pale color, and pale irises can be a sign of cataract.

people with cases of cataract that aren't too bad, even though surgery is recommended, can see better if they wear glasses.

and leukocoria can be caused by cataract.

maybe that's the reason he's hiding his eyes from the light here with his hair? his eyes are sensible to light?

i know this is really long but i hope you all don't mind too much, luka is my favourite (if you couldn't tell) and this new information awakened my medical knowledge :)

sorry if some stuff don't make sense, as always, english is not my first language, I hope it's atleast a bit coherent!

(tagging some people because I think you'd like to see this.... @shakingparadigm @sotogalmo @paradisedisconcert @m1zisua @junebluues @bluemoonscape @4listr @nottoonedin @pwippy SORRY IF ANY OF YALL DIDNT WANT TO BE TAGGED)

[peineperdu]

nevermind. it's here, goodbye world

cant watch arcane season two act two yet. horrible

[stevie-petey]

When can we get some insight into jon’s mixtape 🤠

.... yes <3 you can listen to the mixtape here x

spoilers below !!

ok. i spent SO LONG on this mixtape. finding songs that not only were from the 80s but also songs jonathan would listen to but then also were songs that reminded him of bug ,,,, whew . shit was rought. but im so so so proud of it <333

so heres a long overdue analysis of the playlist ;)

in my life by the beatles: this is bugs song. ive said it before and i'll continue to say this. its her song. the lyrics remind me so much of her, its a song that encompasses all that i imagine her to be. she grew up with this song, its the song her dad would sing to her. and jonathan knew this and added the song because he knew she'd love it <3

in my life, i love you more.

uh oh, love comes to town by talking heads: this song is the bug n jon theme song in my mind. it kinda embodies who i see them as. this song started playing in jons head the moment the hendersons moved to hawkins <333 its a cute, fun song that he would play whenever bug was hanging out in his room. cuties !

im a know it all. im the smartest man around. thats right, you learn real fast. youre the smartest girl in town.

stay by oingo boingo: this song is about being vulnerable with someone and begging them to stay with you even though they cant offer you anything else ,,, pretty self explanatory i believe. when jon first hears this song he cant help but laugh at the irony of it all, and thats why he puts it in the mixtape. he knows only bug will understand.

this is not the first time you had to get away.

soul love by david bowie: i was iffy with this song. its not my favorite of bowies, but i think its just bizarre enough to catch jonathans attention. i think he hears it one day and it makes him think of how much bug loves everyone around her. the song is weird and philosophical and he knew immediately she would love it.

love is careless in its choosing.

these days by joy division: this song is so angsty jon coded i had to add it. i think this song can be interpreted however you want. for me, i think its about disliking the times youre living in but having someone next to you side to make it all bearable. for jon, this is bug for him. when shit goes wrong, shes always there and hes always there for him. theyve always taken care of one another, even during the bad.

searched hard for you and your special ways.

venus by television: this song talks about falling into the arms of venus de milo, a statue of venus that has no arms. read that however you want. but i interpret it as falling in love with nothing to catch you. thats kinda how bug and jon ended up. they both fell, it was a childish, free for all fall. its unclear whether the song is about love itself or the effect of drugs, but i think that makes it even more symbolic of jonathan and bug. the line that always seems to blur.

there stood another person who was a little surprised to be face to face with a world so alive.

youre all ive got tonight by the cars: now THIS song is just. so so so late seasons jon and bug. it perfectly describes their codependency. this song is all jonathan is for bug. he doesnt care if she hurts him or mocks him or breaks his heart and bug doesnt care if he does the same to her. this is where things get a bit :/// because of jonathans later phone call lmao.

i dont care if you use me again. i dont care if you abuse me again.

another day by the cure: god this song is so </333 its so lazy sunday afternoon staring out the window with the person who understands your silences as sworn oaths. and thats exactly how jonathan found the song. he had been listening to the record with bug one afternoon and she was laying next to him and he when he looked at her, it hit him. he was in love with her. this is the song that jonathan fell in love with bug to. she doesnt know this. she never will.

the sun rises slowly on another day.

what a great note to end on LMAO

[stick-ball]

I WAS LOOKING FOR A JEREMY BPD/ANGER ISSUES POST I THOUGJT I HAD SEEN THIS MORNING PLEASE WRITE YOUR HEADCANNONS AGAIN I BEG OF YOU GIVE JEREMY KNOX THE LOVE HE DESERVES

Okay so this is long overdue, but might as well. I guess this is an observation of fandom Jeremy as much as the canon one, so don't come at me.

I dunno read Jeremy as having BPD bcs... bcs honestly have you ever met anyone who has Sunshine shining from their ass? Me neither. Though I have met ppl with severe personality issues who had a coping mechanism like that, of course they weren't young and talented sportsmen looked up to by many ppl and rooted for by many, so they had enough free space and privacy to go absolutely fucked up at other ppl when they were having bad brain hours.

Yes im including myself here.

The name of the game is If I Give Them No Reason to Leave Me They Won't.

Or If I Give Them No Things To Hate Me For They Won't Hurt me.

But spice it up with black and white thinking, paranoia and unhelathy behaviours jumping off the standard spectrum of bottling things out into like, going on a 4 hour run to cool off bcs you are undeserving bcs you are a bad captain bcs you're annoyed at the freshmen bcs they dont care about your shared goals enough and is thay really a them issue? Or is it actually a You issue? Are you blaming others for your own failures again? Look at yourself, you're fucking pathetic, and egoistic at that, you demand things from others but how do you show you care for what others need huh? You think you're a good captain? Keep telling yourself that, before you know it they will all turn against you. Because you're a failure, bcs you cant even make them care? Maybe you're just not a good enough player , or maybe they can see straight through you, see what you are udnerneath the happy exterior. Yo have just not good enough, not trying hard enough, and you want them to look up to.. to That???

Or maybe it is a them issue bcs fuck that, fuck the smiling, fuck the caring, you don't actually care, if they don't care, why would you? 🤔 you don't owe anyone anything you are so done with everyone and everything cant they LEAVE YOU THE FUCK ALONE, HAVENT YOU DONE ENOUGH TO HAVE AT LEAST ONE SMALL THING GO RIGHT ONCE? YOU ARE SO FUCKKNG ANGRY so you have to do something you feel like smashing something, you could, your body is literally a machine, you could show them what you actually think about their Opinions, how pathetic and annoying they are and actually fuck that you have to leave you cant stand being in the same room as them for one second longer.

But the sunshine Jeremy 🌞 exterior slips on so even though you want to crash the doors closed you smile and wave and say something stupid and cheery you even have a fucking spring in your step.

Bcs you're a fucking liar a fucking impostor you can't help it at this point you are a clay figurine that's hollowed out inside.

You are so tired it's like there's a lump of cloth absolutely soaked weighting on your lungs

You actually feel like crying while you wave at alvarez from the stretch of the corridor, making goddamn plans to meet up for group studying maths later in the evening while your lungs constrict holding down a sob.

You hate them all for the next 3 hours.

And then on hour four while you're circling the campus heading back from your walk/jog/run/staring into the distance/jog again you tap into the very comfortable very familiar hating of yourself.

This is a light version of course but I bet Jeremy is that person that dissapears sometimes like at parties ect bcs they are doing some absolutely stupid shit like having sex with a complete stranger or getting drunk but they know enough about the emptiness and self hatred they will feel ten minutes after they succumb to thay behaviour that they learned to do it when the judgment of the ppl who know them won't touch this piece of him. Bcs it feels like a separate piece.

Like he is parcelled into different breeds of fucked up inside and they are all set on a loop in a music playing machine from a highway diner. One song ends another starts you can choose which one if you throw in a dime.

And also we gotta add in the sensory issues, he sees things, he hears them, sometimes he does a dodge while there's nothing coming bcs he thought it was. Some weeks it feels almost he lives from one training to the next bcs he doesn't remember a minute from what's in between. Good thing he taught himself this sunny persona bcs its an autopilot mode that gets him having to answer the least amount of questions when he doesn't fucking remember what happened from 8 am till late afternoon that day.

[onejellyfishplease]

So, I noticed that Tinker-the-dragon showed you storyboards of their own animatic (which looks great btw, can't wait to see it), and since you said you enjoyed seeing the process, I figured I'd do the same! After all, having people acknowledge and get excited for my WIPs gives me a sense of accountability to finish it, which makes it much more likely to actually get done.

So, behold my chaotic, colorful rough sketches!

The process is slow-going, since I am simultaneously working on a couple other creative projects, some are tangentially related to this one (like how I'm finalizing my headcanon designs for all the turtles beyond just Donnie), and some aren't (like drawing long overdue art of my D&D party's characters).

I'm also making some guesses/taking some liberties when it comes to the timeline. Like, I'm assuming that this AU takes place post S2 finale, and thus will take place in the new lair, but I don't actually know. (If this has been addressed in asks before, I'm probably too new of a fan of SnapDonnie to have paid attention to those asks, and don't have the attention span to scroll through a ton of asks just to obtain a specific bit of information)

Similarly, I don't know exactly at what point Donnie starts attracting flies. It might not be as early as I'm depicting here. I can certainly move that part to a later section, but I don't know what I'd replace it with.

In general, if you have suggestions for things to be changed/switched around to better fit with the 'canon' of SnapDonnie, I'd love to hear it. It's better to make changes now while things are still very rough and flexible, than once I'm more committed and frames have taken quite a bit more effort to make.

Sorry for the super long 'ask,' this ended up being a bit of an info-dump lol.

WHA- YOURE MAKING ONE TOO????

thats so cool omg!! And im just gonna go a bit crazy over the frames if u dont mind me~ BUT THE ONE WITH THE SHADOW??? thats literally so creative im obsessed with it. I love cinematic shots like that, they just make my brain buzz <3

and the one where hes doing thumbs up to Raph absolutely cracked me up!

Also to answer your questions- SnapDonnie takes please after the movie, So Raph has a blind eye and hole in his shell/plastron, Mikey has his scars (though u cant drawing them in bandages to aviod drawing them if i want -i always forget to draw them lol) and Leo has a leg brace.

And as for the flies, Donnie starts to attract them basically immediately once the physical changes start, though he basically douses himself with insect repellent at first (while he still wants to repel them) So frames 24 and 25 would go after he really starts to change instead of before.

Hope that helps!! It looks amazing so far! <3

[mcl38]

they haven't quite turned on vcarb the way they did mclaren but from what i've read that seems to be bc daniel keeps saying "it's not the same problem as mclaren" when like idk dude if the only time you've finished a race ahead of yuki was bc you got put on softs at the end of the race it is smelling very shades of mexico '22 to me. just without the having to make up a time penalty bc u punted yuki off the track.

i can say yuki is already getting the lando treatment though. "hOW MANY RACES HAS HE WON AND YOU DARE SAY HES PERFORMING BETTER THAN AN 8 TIME GP WINNER?" (ya i'll go to the top floor of my apartment and shout it into the void through a megaphone too what are you going to do about it) only this time there's a heavy dose of racism added in. the amount of people i have seen calling yuki a "pokémon" derogatorily and refusing to admit the racist connotations there are wild. not to mention the ableist terms i've seen be used to refer to his height. it's all very gross and yet again daniel says nothing to even try to prevent it. it's wild how someone always has to get harassed by his fans regardless of if he fails or succeeds.

ok so like first of all yikes. i rly rate yuki but im v selective w my online (especially my tumblr)

experience so i rly almost never venture out of my mclaren-centred bubble, which means i never rly see what ppl say abt him. 'pokemon' is actually vile like thats so clearly racist bc its not even a pun of his name at all or any sort of reference to his personality?? AND the fact that its a cartoon w the infantilising implications of that... ku's essay on the infantilisation of east asian drivers u will always be famous.... like u guys ever noticed how nyck is also rly short and has a youthful face and nobody ever talked abt him in the way they talk abt yuki? much to think abt

now. permission to be mean here but even if its 'not the same problem as mclaren' is the problem not STILL the fact that daniel in his 10+ year career hasnt bothered to understand the way the engineering of f1 cars works in like any material way and thats the reason he always struggles to identify his driving issues / has a disconnect with his chassis unless its tailored exactly to what he already likes and knows how to drive? i saw that bit from newey's book about how max and checo give rly good feedback and so did webber and vettel and it was kind of subtly implying that during the bit in between (the daniel era) he designed less effective cars be he wasnt getting enough precise feedback.... i genuinely havent been able to sleep at night since. like it felt like smth slotted in my head like aaaah this has been the problem all along. if only daniel wasnt so busy going on podcasts making fun of the idea of women in motorsport and actually spent some time to do some way overdue physics homework... lol. Imao even

the truth of the situation is yuki is in the best form of his career and also wiping the floor w daniel. like factually so. EVEN with team orders favouring daniel so his fans cant say its bc of that like they did with mclaren. i genuinely think its quite sad the amount of personal stock daniel fans have clearly invested in this mans career and how much it bothers them when he doesnt perform to their expectations - like he's ur driver, swallow it and accept it, because thats what he's been doing to try to move on. doing all this intense online hate bullshit only makes him look bad bc it highlights how badly and for how long he rly has been embarrassingly underperforming. but by this point it feels like they WANT him to underperform bc they crave that martyr underdog victimised figure to root for and fight for - which is why ur totally right anon, that someone always inevitably gets harrassed regardless of if daniel is failing or succeeding. 

i will say one thing which is that i rly dont think daniel is at all aware of whatever the fuck his fans do on twitter and instagram (and deffo not tumblr lmao). so i dont think this is an issue of like him telling his fans to chill out - and it doesnt work anyways, bc lando literally has made talking abt how much cyberbullying sucks a part of his personality and theres still some rly mean and hateful lando fans (not in a fun way like me<3 lol) (i hate on my own blog and in discord groupchats). so like thats not necessarily on him, its more on netflix for making him the lowest common denominator guy to like, ykwim? also the unfortunate reality is that despite the tshirts and the kneeling (or no kneeling) no one rly seems to stand up to defend the drivers of colour who literally constantly get SUCH vitriol thrown towards them w any occasion. im not expecting daniel of all ppl to say anything abt it ngl

[tea-and-formaldehyde]

tw vent i suppose.

can i just say. i am not hanging by a thread. i am not hanging at all. i am at the bottom of the cliff alone and sad desperately waiting for someone to save me because there is not an ounce of comfort I can find in anyone except people i rarely see. and by rarely i mean rarely. And instead i am slowly going deeper and deeper into a cave i found that only gets sadder and quieter and darker.

I like being alone but sometimes i just need a friend to sit next to me and tell me that my life will get better and that I will love myself again and i wont stop being so mean. when i dont want to be mean. i need someone i can cry next to.

im sad and lonely at the bottom of a cliff, waiting for someone to come and help because i feel like i cant live without someone beside me yet i have no one. I am looking up at the sky wishing i could be up there with everyone else.

im always so scared with everything i do, as if someone will hate me for simply saying hello. sometimes i think that maybe this is all just in my head and that im doing fine and that im not wishing i was someone completely different because my own reflection feels so alien to me. it looks like a different person to who i feel i am.

ive got so many things due and overdue, so many people i never talk to, so many decisions i regret.

i sometimes wish i wasnt a living being so i didnt have to worry

because sometimes im happy but sometimes i wake up to reality

but no one will help. i'll only be denied and turned down. my parents when i say anything always argue with me and tell me that im just thinking it in my head and that its just me and that i shouldnt give a goddamn shit at my age but theyre not me so idk how they could say that because they feel so entitled to making me like them theyre acting like i belong to them like im their property like i have to be what they want me to be and they do that to my siblings and everything around me is falling and i cant possibly sweat enough about the sadness and anger that boils inside me when i think about this because i try so hard yet no one accepts it and everyone denies that i can do anything at all without instantly failing and i cant fucking take it anymore i want to scream and cry and hit my head against a wall and the floor and break glass and bones and sometimes i think of hurting people but i know i cant do that but at the same time i do but even when i speak i hate it i cant do anything without hating it and yet.

you. the people who understand me. the people who say such positive things about me. the people who are honest good which are the people i havent even seen the face of. i am on the verge of being so desperate that i trust people i havent even met because i dont have anyone. im young. im a kid. a minor. this is too much on my shoulders and i just want to live how i want and yet people in my life say that i cant do that.

so can i ask

who is here at the bottom of the cliff with me.

who is here at the edge of the deeper cave im about to crawl into

who is here with me

though i cannot see you

i love you and i wish you all the best

because i feel so alone

and i feel so thankful for your company even if it is short

[verynastyspoon]

Brokeback Mountain (alternate happy ending)

Warnings: Smut and Mention of murder

———————————————————

Ennis and Jack were up on brokeback mountain. The sun was setting, a fire is burning and Ennis and Jack are having a long overdue conversation

“Me and Lureen divorced.” Jack said looking up at Ennis. 

“Oh, sorry.” Ennis takes a swig of whiskey.

“Ennis,” Jack sighs “what are we doing?”

“What do you mean?”

Jack pulls Ennis close by his jacket.

“Ennis we’re both divorced now, and I don’t wanna spend another moment away from you. Whats stopping us from just living out in a cabin in the middle of nowhere?”

“Our kids, our jobs, getting beaten to death for being queer. The list goes on Jack.”

“Im sick of being fucking miserable Ennis!” Jack stands up. “Having to spend every god damn day alone not being able to be who I am, I’m fucking sick of it! Life is too short to stay living like this.”

“Jack do you think I fucking like this either!” Ennis puts his head in his hands and takes a deep breath.

Jack sits back down and puts a hand on Ennis shoulder. “We don’t have to, we can get new jobs and live in the middle of nowhere away from everyone who can hurt us.”

“What about our kids?”

“We both only get to see our kids once a month. We can move to a state in between Texas and Wyoming and when we get to see our kids stay in a hotel with them.”

“And how the hell would we afford all this.”

“Lureen was loaded and after the divorce I got half he money.” Jack takes Ennis face in his hands. “We have all the tools we need to be happy, the only thing stopping us is you.”

Ennis takes Jack hands off his face and takes them into his own. Ennis sits in thought for a while then looks up into Jack eyes. “You’re right Jack.” Ennis takes a deep breath. “Lets do it.”

Jack smiles brighter than he has in his whole life, happy tears brimming in his eyes as he pulls Ennis into a kiss. “I love you Ennis del mar.”

Ennis looks at him in shock not expecting the sudden confession. He pulls Jack into a hug and softly says. “I love you too Jack twist.” Ennis pulls Jack back into the kiss.

The kiss was different than normal. Most of the other ones were full of lust and intent, but this one was only showing their love and devotion for one another. Jack knocks of Ennis’s hat, running his fingers through his hair pulling him closer. Ennis runs in tongue along Jacks lips asking for entry which was quickly accepted. Their tongues move perfectly together after over a decade of practice.

Jack stands up taking Ennis with him, kissing all the way to the tent. He lays Ennis down and straddles his waist, kissing his neck and jawline. Jack unbuttons Ennis’s shirt, and kisses his way down after every button. Jack softly grinds against Ennis’s buldge, while rubbing his hands down Ennis’s newly exposed chest.

Ennis groans softly and pulls Jack back down into a quick kiss and starts unbuckling his pants. Jack gets the message and scoots down in between Ennis’s legs while unbuttoning his own shirt. Ennis pushes his pants and boxers down just enough for his half hard cock to pop out. Jack takes it into his hands pumping his cock to full length. He licks the underside of his cock from bottom to top before sucking on the tip. Ennis lets out a loud groan urging him to go deeper. Jack takes him in further into his mouth, bobbing his head up and down, using his hands for whatever he cant fit.

After a while of going this same rhythm Jack hollows out his cheeks and takes Ennis’s length as far as he can. Jacks gags but pushes through. He looks up at Ennis with tears in his eyes, dick all the way down his throat, pubes brushing against his nose looking absolutely pathetic. All Ennis can think about is how beautiful Jack looks choking on his cock.

“Fuck,” Ennis groans, pulling Jack off his length with a loud slurp. He makes quick work of Jack’s pants, switching positions, Ennis now straddling the others waist. Jack kicks his pants the rest of the way off as Ennis spits on his fingers and prods at Jack hole. One finger slips in with ease, quickly followed by a second. They pull each other into a passionate kiss, as Ennis scissors Jack open.

Ennis pulls back and grabs his cock, rubbing it against Jacks already abused hole. Jack wraps his legs around Ennis, urging him to thrust in. He complies and slowly pushes into Jack’s tight hole. They both groan in approval, cuddling there for a moment, not moving, just enjoying their shared love for each other. Ennis dips his head into Jack shoulder breathing in his scent, as he slowly starts to move. They hold each other, both softly kissing anything within reach.

Ennis puts his hands under Jacks ass, giving him more leverage and a better angle. They move faster, starting to desperately grind against each other. Ennis starts trying different angles trying to find the others prostate, when he does Jack lets out a high pitch moan.

This sinful sound of wet ploping and groans is all that can be heard within brokeback moutian. Jack cums first, involuntary squeezing around the others cock. Ennis pushes in as far as he can and cums deep within Jack.

They both lay there basking in post orgasm bliss, enjoying each others presence.

——————————————————————————

Authors note: This is my first fic! I would love some constructive criticism to help me get better.

[sixosix]

girl (/gn) i totally get you esp about being a xiao kisser.. like?? imagine being so down bad for your main but you can barely write him as good as you do for the rest of your faves :')) BUT BRO (/gn) I SERIOUSLY LOOOOVE ALL YOUR FICS!! the moment i found you, binged each n every one >:)) it's okay, xiao will find his time to shine, so much so that you'll feel super proud once it happens.

ANYWHOOOO!! here is the brainrot that i got, i really hope that i sent this at a good time, otherwise feel free to just let this float away~ (also i'm so, so hooked by thawed. lyney had absolutely no right to be so delulu over the reader- I LEGIT GIGGLED WHEN LYNETTE SAID PROPOSED TO THE READER COME AWNNN!!! lyney, honey, i will shake you by the shoulders.)

promise by laufey, right?

i personally think this song has such a very.. hurt, hurt, hurt, comfort and then more hurt, but at last, comfort vibe. it fits both boys - both lyney and aether. they are so magnificent, shining brightly on their own- one on a stage and the other across nations. pulling away from them hurts like a bitch, because their love felt like a warm embrace that burned like a bandage each time you tried to yank away.

being with them was like heaven. being with them brought you the kind of joy that eternal paradise would supply. being with them .. archons, being with them felt like their mere presence could shelter you away from the darkness of the world.

and it hurts to be something.

because being with them meant danger. meant arguments- ones that neither of you can win. it spelled disaster with each wound, and caused misery with each day left alone to one's devices. being with them meant that you were forced to watch your stunning significant other play a perfect part in a life you don't think you fit- oh, you've done the math. there was no solution, and there was no way to force you — a mere extra puzzle piece — to fit their masterpiece.

yet it's worse to be nothing with them.

ok n then that's the end of my brainy brainrot.. the second last verse in the song:

So I broke my promise

I called you last night

I shouldn't have, I wouldn't have

If it weren't for the sight of a boy

Who looked just like you

Standing out on Melrose Avenue

can you imagine just how beautiful it would be to imagine a scene where you taught you mistook the sight of the one closest to your heart, and in an act of desperation and longing, you try to hurry and contact them. shaky hands and shivering figure, your heart practically weeping with overdue worry and grief of your past relationship, only to find them also looking for you- as if it was fate. clinging to each other and pouring your hearts out into the only two souls that could hear you two.

AHHH THAT'S IT THOO,,, hope you didn't mind the brainrot, i totally really just "hm user sixosix would very much enjoy this idea methinks" BUT I DID NOT PLAN THIS OUT VERY WELL. hope you're having a good day, afternoon, evening, night!! ❤️

HI!!! i see ur reblogs a lot so its rlly rlly nice to see u interacting more and more often! :D im soso happy u like thawed. that series is my baby. ALSO its rlly cute u thought id like this idea BC I DO!!! wow. U get me.

your writing is soso pretty :( ITS POETRY!!! i love it and how u captured the feel of the song (which is just pain) and the “you were forced to watch your stunning significant other play a perfect part in a life you don't think you fit” OHHH!!! thats the shit i live for. realizing that you dont fit in w the life he lives in. Pain.

what i think is that this song fits aether the most !!! OUUUGHH you knowing that aether has to leave teyvat eventually but u cant help but long for him THATS THE GOOD SHIT “we’ll never last / why can’t i let go of this?”

“i made a promise to distance myself” BC u know that you have to stop caring so u dont get hurt when he leaves!!!!’

this song is beyond perfect tysm for sharing this w me!! Ough now i may end up writing this and blame it on you bc its so perfect 😭😭😭

[selamat-linting]

there was a few things i missed and got wrong on my homestuck liveblog yesterday. first of all, i mistook terezi with kanaya with that morallegiance chat with vriska. makes sense, they used to be roleplay buddies until that mess of an incident. not taking away vriska's responsibility from that clusterfuck but, wonder how much of it is doc scratch influence. good god girl, why are you gambling with a literal god? also WHY rose is trusting that white ball asshole? i dont like him at all. he's basically responsible to a lot of the mess the trolls and beta kids is going through.

anyway, at the last page i left off, terezi and vriska's attitude towards each other is largely shown in the boy-off with dave and john. with karkat screaming in the background (he always screams in the background). so its easy to miss that theyre very much in a weird complicated, frenemy state with each other. that in between space where you're not sure if theyre genuinely fucking hates each other or theyre ribbing on each other like two meanspirited friends do. i've been there sister, i've been there.

speaking of vriska (again, because she is my child who has every disease), oh her relationship/friendship with tavros is very conflicted and, i dare say, delicious? this is something that im sure would hit even harder if tavros wasnt relegated to the butt of ableist jokes more than he's treated as a character but. trust me. imagine youre tavros. your friend(?) is vriska. she crippled you, she saved your life, she berates you at every turn, she kissed you. deep down she only wants best for you. she wanted you to kill her. she wanted you to hate her enough to do it. she doesnt want to bleed to death alone. she's begging you to kill her. she's could have forced you to do it but she doesnt. because this is for you both to grow stronger and survive. thats all she wanted all along. for you both to thrive in a world that eats you alive. she needs you to kill her. oh god *head in hands*

-so its really really sad to see vriska being so lonely after killing tavros. she dug a hole too deep to get out alone and the remaining friends she had that could have accepted her again are all dead or too burned out of her. i wish they both can meet each other again. just to talk and find closure. like, tavros deserves to be angry with vriska and he deserves to have that peace he always wanted from her. and vriska deserves to start being a better person and getting some peace of mind. she deserves a chance, is all im saying. like, its okay if tavros cant give it to her. but some of her friends could. maybe terezi? the worst they ever do to each other in terms of direct harm is the eye injury. or maybe karkat? oh god i dont want to hear them arguing, i would go deaf!

-at least vriska has john! its nice to see them being friends with each other. Tbh john has been a breath of fresh air (hehe) in all the doom and gloom. im not looking forward to him meeting his dead dad but right now, my boy is walking around the village with one of the finest music i heard so far. and then he drive a flying car with WV. its just, he is so positive and amidst a set of characters who lost all of their innocence, he remains as the one guy who tries to enjoy the game and take everything in stride. he felt smug when the salamanders keep referencing in his title, he bought everyone hats and snacks, he gave moral support to vriska. the harley and egbert family is so positive about everything and its so endearing!

-AND JADE! fuck yeah she's starting to show how awesome she is. YES JADE say fuck you to karkat! its been long overdue!!! she also should say fuck you to vriska too as a treat. and fuck you to tavros too. and fuck you to that prince of hope (more like doom lol) who blew up her computer. she deserve monetary compensation to deal with that troll polycruel.

-special mention to dave btw. i dont remember him doing anything particularly exciting lately but i believe he's the one carrying the team. john and jade had to do their quest to be effective in defeating the english demon guy (the brits are all demons lol) and rose had to be their prime researcher and strategist, so he basically did the save everyone's ass part. i cant wait to see him hang out with terezi. Also is it bad of me to want him go godtier? Like, it would be interesting.

-and other time aspect characters i want to appreciate, aradia! babygirl have finally get rid of her hopelessness and come back to life! and now she's bringing the gang back together!!! and putting the pieces on why gamzee suddenly breaks. too bad gamzee never had a chance to show his personality. anyway, im starting to think i was wrong about lil cal. like, i think it was posessed but oh no its just bro moving him around, but somehow that fucking puppet is the one wrapped up in literally everything. aradia finds that shitty doll and somehow its connected to gamzee losing it and the game sgurb and doc scratch and... whats going on????

-in conclusion, timebound kids are always the one carrying the team. they are hard to find but theyre the one who could determine how you win or lose the game.

-but how can i forget? kanaya! she came through. i really thought she was dead! but she is alive, and she kills people with a chainsaw than apply lipstick to her bloodstreak lips. she is trying so hard to be Hinged. final girl behavior fr. i wonder how she's going to meet rose again. i hope she talked rose out of that suicide mission.

-and can we talk about karkat? man, imagine leading an army of kids who did kill and maim each other before the game even starts. imagine being the lowest of the social hierarchy and trying to make the most toxic friendgroup filled with racists and murderers to listen to you. imagine being able to do that despite all the odds, bring them to victory, and have the price right on your hands only for it to be ripped away and your friends devolve into chaos and murder several hours later. its a failure of untold magnitude. no wonder he's so disturbed and angry at himself and everyone.

-okay now that im done with the characters. i want to compliment how good everyone looks. the art and the fashions are all sooo amazing. the talksprite is also wonderful. im inclined to change my pfp into feferi's talksprite because i like her design so much. also because hooray! She's just dead, not corrupted by horrorterrors. in my mind she is laughing at tavros and doomed dave rap battle while surrounded by beautiful scenery

-also, i cant believe infinite stairs are referenced AGAIN with sollux and karkat. and SMUPPET ASS JOKE? on tavros dead body? lmao. okay i need to see smuppet ass on dave again. he was just so funny with it. and karkat shipping craze with jadesprite and jade. the jokes are really good, fr

[fdrsamericanflagduckfloaty]

🪲🥑🛼

....

since its just showing me boxes ill assume you meant the wip one- send another ask if you didnt, saying what emojis they r bc i cant tell-

add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here.

man i dont got a current wip 😭😭 my writing ass has been so backed up by stuff (overdue assignments for 3 months straight) uhhh let me. search my docs

uh. this is a wip fic of an 80s movie called Overboard. frankly idk what possessed me to even begin this but there was too much tension between the romantic lead (complete asshole) and his best friend

ok this is like. pre-movie to movie to post-movie but this is pre-movie, they're 15 and 13. god i wish it was a NATM fic instead so this wasnt as embarrassing sokjnhb

in the cut below

Dean nodded, pulled his hand away. “Hm. Fifteen.” He said, shoving his hands back into his pockets. He seemed like he was just talking to Billy because he had nothing better to do—which was fine with Billy, because really, neither did he. And if he was going to talk to anybody, at least it was with someone he would get to know.

“…Do we have the same classes?” Billy asked, and Dean didn’t look at him when he answered.

 “How would I know? You haven’t even started yet.”

 And that was… a pretty good answer, since Billy felt a little embarrassed he even asked. It was a dumb question. But he did reexamine the other kid in front of him. He seemed like trouble, looked like trouble, and if he looked close enough, he could see that Dean’s knuckles had healed scabs over them. Like he had punched someone, or something. He probably did.

i went like 5 words above 150 im sorry-

[nosoulsheresorry]

if life isnt about death

and it is, as they say, about finding and molding your own meaning

what happens when your meaning leaves

when it walks away from you without a note

without anything to hold onto?

because i dont want memories

i want a person, here

and i want them to hear me

and i cant i cant i just cant do this not now not ever really

what do you do when you start spiralling again?

what do you do when you can pinpoint every repeating warning sign?

what do you do when this time theres no one here to stop you?

when no one is around to talk you out of it?

when you thought you could handle your own only to notice all-too-late that youre spiralling again

do you reach out?

you only want one specific person your one specific meaning

but its gone now without a trace without a return label

do you mother yourself?

you cant, thats just one more sign one more repetition

youve done this before, you know where it leads

do you call a professional?

with what money

and what time

and what will

and what white woman this time

do you get high and fulfill that prophecy that you once got so close to?

with what money

youll steal

and you wont feel shameful

its hard to when everything depends on the 20 extra bucks you need

there is no protocol for this

and if there was

it would not end with

“get under the sheets again, phone in one hand and wax in the other”

everything feels so absurd when you get like this doesnt it?

everything feels ridiculous, silly, unreal, unimportant

the only thing important is saving yourself

how do you do that?

there is an urgency here

like i need to figure this out right here right now

because i dont want to know what happens if i dont

because last time, i didnt have to know what happens

because last time, i didnt save myself, i wasnt left to my own devices

last time, i got saved

i got grounded

and im not looking to get fixed

i just want to make it all bearable

i want to calm down

i want to be able to sleep again

i want to be able to be sober again

i want to be able to be sober, there is no again

what do you do

how do you alleviate it

how do you make it tolerable

because it feels like everything is crashing down

it feels like its been overdue and now im running behind

it feels like if only someone could carry this with me

it feels like if only my meaning hadnt jumped out my window

it feels like no matter what i do, ill always end up here in the end

if feels like maybe its selfish to drag someone else into this

if i cant handle living through it

if i am here wishing for a way to plan it

then how can i expect someone to stand by

how i can i justify putting someone through a fraction of what im going through

if they arent planning, they shouldnt have to hear of someone planning

you hate to hear peoples sob stories about it

why give anyone yours?

but id give him mine in a heartbeat

and there i am again

same old tired lonely place

building a mythical boy

loving a mythical boy

blaming his material counterpart for not measuring up

so what now

we’ve circled all the way around

so what now

if not a boy, if not a therapist, if not drugs, and if no not ever yourself,

then what now

now i go to sleep

i wake up tomorrow and brush my teeth

i find a reason to brush the tears off

to see the blanket as what it is, immobile

and i hope and pray that my reason doesnt end up circling back to the boy

and i go to sleep

[mrfoox]

I know im a broken record but I really just wish I could find some happiness or at least peace that lasts for more than 5 mins when I'm alone

[cheerstofuckedupyearz]

Ya’know what?? I’m tired. That is what.