#im trying very hard to get out what i think about it all… if it doesnt make sense im so sorry

[pedrosgrogu]

Born Too Late - Chapter 6

pairing/au: neighbor!joel x reader // no outbreak

Warnings: MDNI!! soft/sad joel, angst, tension, drinking, idk what else, let me know if i missed something.

Summary: you break off the situationship and the feelings after it are overwhelming, for both you and Joel.  (2.4k+)

a/n: idk what this is, i woke up ready to write and here we are. i feel like i suck at writing from both POVs so idk how frequently ill do it but i feel like it was necessary here. always a major thank u to my bestie raven for proofing and feeding the delusions and ideas. i love all feedback so if you have any, pls share.

p.s. there will be another thanksgiving chapter tonight hehe. 

Master List - Chapter 5

*Joel’s POV*

You can feel the door slam and vibrate through your bones. The sound of the sink dripping reverberates through the entire house. You stand there in disbelief; in shock. You hadn’t fallen so hard for someone since Sarah's mom, and boy did she fuck that up. Did you come on too strong? Was it the fact that you have a child? A million thoughts run through your head, but none make any sense. 

By 11:30, you’re on your 3rd glass of whiskey. You aren't drunk, but you're in a sweet spot of euphoria to combat the evening's prior feelings. You’re watching reruns of Bonanza and begin to doze, until the phone rings. You jump up, “maybe it's her” you think out loud. Answering with a burly “Hello?”, not even checking caller ID. “Hey brother. Bad news, Im down at county again got in a little-” “Goddamnit Tommy.” You say, standing up, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I know, I'm sorry. But if someones not here to get me within the next 30, I'm here all weekend.” Tommy says, sounding desperate. You don't say anything for a minute, trying to figure out if you should be his savior yet again or let him learn a lesson. “I'm on the way” you grunt, hanging up the phone before he can respond. You throw on your t-shirt and jeans from earlier, and they still smell like her. The sigh that escapes your mouth is guttural. Why do you have such strong feelings about someone you barely fucking know? 

You grab your keys and pull the door behind you; locking only the bottom. You look towards her house and notice the lights are all off, except her bedroom. You see her reading in bed, her hair still up and her Texans sweatshirt bunched around her. The last time you looked in her window, something very different was happening. She was on the verge of losing herself to you. You feel your jeans twitch and get in your truck. It rumbles to life and you peel down the street, praying you make it to county before midnight. 

*Reader’s POV* 

You slam the door behind you, and tears are building in your eyes. You pause, hoping to hear the door open and for Joel to come running after you, but he doesn't. You kick your shoes off at the door and head straight to your room, not turning any lights on. You sit in silence for a few minutes, unsure of what emotions are about to pop out next. You shoot Penny a text, not even thinking about the time in Ireland. 

You: Hey Pen, can you talk? 

You throw yourself on your bed, clutching your phone and holding back tears.

*ding* 

You pick up your phone, not sure who you want to text you more, Joel or Penny. 

Penny: Respectfully, do you know what time it is here?! 

You: I'm sorry Pen, I didn’t even realize. We can catch up tomorrow, just call me when you’re free. I’ll be home all day.  As soon as you hit send, the phone rings. 

“Hey Pen” you say, trying not to sound as upset as you are. 

“Yellow, what's wrong?” She says, yawning. 

“Nothing Pen, I just missed you!” You say, trying to sound cheery. 

“Girl, it's like 10:30 at your house, I know you weren't just up thinking of me.” 

So you spill. You tell her about how he spoke to you at the conference, and how he cooked you dinner. How he fucked you into oblivion again. By the end of your spiel, you’re in tears again. 

“Okay so from what I can gather, you obviously like him. Right? Sooooo why did we cut this off? I don't understand the whole “Ethical Misconduct” if you’re both consenting adults?”

You sigh, sniffling. “It's complicated. I truly don’t think anything would happen, but since his daughter is in my class, I don't want it to look like I’d be favoring her. I just feel stuck. I feel stuck because hello- he's hot but hello- I also don't know anything about him except his name, and how he fucks. I just-” Penny cuts you off

 “I think the best thing for you to do if you aren't going to pursue this, is to leave it alone. Don’t talk to him unless it involves his daughter. Don’t even look in his direction. I hate to see you so torn up over this, but if nothing can come of it, it's time to let it die.” 

You mute the phone, letting out a sigh, and a whimper. You know Pennys right, and she only wants whats best for you. It's so fucking annoying being so far away from your best friend. You’d give anything to hug her right now.

“Hello?” she says. You unmute. 

“Sorry Pen, I'm here.” You look at the clock. 11:18. 

“Penny, I appreciate this, and you. I love you so so much, and I'm sorry for texting so early.” You say, giggling. “But I'm tired, and I want today to be over.” 

“I'm always a phone call away Yellow. Always.” 

“Love you Pen.” you say, hanging up. 

You stand up and walk over to your bookshelf. Running your fingers along the spines, you look out the window, and all Joel's lights are off. You find your favorite, pulling it out and rubbing your fingers over the etched title. “The Picture of Dorian Gray”. You throw your blankets back and crawl into bed, turning on your bedside lamp. The room looks warm, but you’re freezing. Your tears begin flowing again and this time, they don't stop. You miss your friends and your family. You miss having someone to come home to, regardless of who it is. 

It’s been a few weeks since you last talked to Joel and you feel the same as you did then. You’re craving his touch, and desperate for him to give you any ounce of attention. But he never does. If you’re ever outside when he is, he never looks your way. He doesn't smile, or wave. He keeps his head low and pretends you aren't there. 

Sarah has come over a few times after learning you were neighbors, to get help with homework and you don't mind it. Making small talk with her about her other classes, her interests, and her family. Today, she came over and brought chocolate chip muffins. “I made these with my dad and Uncle Tommy! If they’re bad, it's because Uncle Tommy put way more chocolate chips than the recipe called for.” She says, laughing. “I'm sure they’re great Sarah,” you say, grabbing 2 plates from the cabinet. “How is Uncle Tommy?” you ask, genuinely. You like Tommy. Based on the few times you’ve met him, he seems like a nice guy. Handsome like his brother, but not quite your type. “He’s good! He and Dad just started working on some big project so they’re gone late sometimes…” She trails off. “Sarah, you are always welcome to come hang out if it gets late and no one is home!” You say, trying not to sound too worried. She smiles at you. You bite into your muffin. “Sarah, these are DELICIOUS!” you say excitedly. “Thanks,” she says with a smile. “So how is your dad? I haven't seen him in a while, but the big new project would explain that.” Sarah sits her muffin down. “He’s okay. He went on a date last weekend, but the woman was kinda weird. She came early when my mom was picking me up and started a fight with her while I was standing there.” “A date?” you say to yourself, trying to keep your emotions together. “I'm sorry that happened, Sarah,” you say, looking at her intently, trying to gauge her feelings. “It’s whatever. They’re going out again tonight so I don't think it bothered him too much.” She says, taking another bite of her muffin. “Uncle Tommy told me we could go roller skating so I should get home to get ready. Ill see you at school next week!” she says, putting her shoes on. “Bye Sarah! Have so much fun, and I cant wait to hear all about it on Monday!” you say, as she closes the door. 

A date. A fucking date. 3 weeks ago he was practically begging you to cum for him and then stay the night, and now he's going on dates? What a fucking asshole.  

*Joel’s POV*

It's been 3 weeks since you last spoke to her. Sarah realized you were neighbors so she's been spending lots of time with you, it's how you get your fix. Tommy noticed your shitty moods and finally cracked what's wrong. 

“I knew you'd been seein’ someone! You ain't been that giddy since you met Sarah's mom.” Tommy pauses and begins again “Shes nice, the neighbor girl. What’d you do to fuck it up?” 

You grab his collar, picking him up. “Do not ever compare her to Sarah's fucking egg donor. EVER,” you grunt, throwing him down. “And I didn’t do shit. We just weren't right for each other,” you say, walking away. “Let me introduce you to Maria’s friend, Celeste. She's kinda crazy but she's a looker!” Tommy says, laughing again. You groan. “Tommy, I don't need you playing matchmaker” you grunt, slinging his work belt at him, “now get your shit and let's go, we’re gonna be late.”

So much for Tommy not playing matchmaker. Its Sarah's weekend at her mom's and Tommy just informed you that Celeste is on the way. As long as Sarah’s mom is gone by the time she gets here, you think. You put on a pair of jeans, brown boots, and a T-shirt. “Sarah, your mom is gonna be here in 5 minutes, are you ready?” you yell down the hallway. “Yes dad, coming!” she says back. You grab your favorite flannel off the back of the couch. 

“Alright honey, I’ll see you Tuesday after school. I have a big day on Monday so you’re gonna stay with your mom for an extra night.” You say, hugging Sarah in the driveway. “I love you”. “I love you too dad!” she replies, opening the door. Before she can get in, a silver Lexus peels up the street and right into your driveway. Celeste. 

After an intense and fucking weird argument between your date and Sarah's mom, you both get into your truck. The silence is deafening. This woman is not your style at all, what the fuck Tommy? 

The date goes well, so well that Celeste asks to see you a second time. You agree, unsure why. She's not you, Yellow. But maybe it's what you need. A change of pace. 

While getting ready for your date, you realize you’re out of shampoo. Usually, you’d say fuck it, body wash can double. But you want to see her, you need to see her. So you throw on your sweats and head next door. 

You knock lightly, hoping not to disturb her. She opens the door and your nose is suffocated with her scent. Lavender and eucalyptus. Her hair is lying natural, wavy, and flowy. You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out. She looks gorgeous. 

“Joel? Hello??” she says, obviously annoyed. 

You snap back to reality. “Hey. I have a meeting tonight and realized I'm out of shampoo. Do you have any?” you now realize how fucking stupid that sounds. “Are you joking?” she says laughing. You smile. “No, I wish I-” She stops you, and her smile slowly turns into a frown. “You have some fucking nerve coming over here and asking me for shampoo, like we’re friends. You haven’t spoken to me in WEEKS. And then to lie about why you need it?” You look at her, dumbfounded. Like a deer in fucking headlights. “Joel, after your date, don't forget to go fuck yourself.” and she slams the door. Her words were sharp like a knife, cutting deep. You feel tears begin to well in your eyes and hear silent sobs through the door. You walk away before she sees you, also crying. 

You call Celeste and tell her to just come to your house, you don't feel like going out. Around 7:30, you hear a car door shut. She knocks, gently. You open the door and there Celeste stands. She's wearing a long-sleeved black dress, with black heels. Her hair is curled and bounces with every step. Again, she's beautiful, but she isn't you, Yellow. 

*Readers POV*

“Joel, after your date, don't forget to go fuck yourself.” you say, slamming the door in his face. You fall to the floor behind the door, letting your sobs escape. Not caring if he hears or not. What a fucking time for this to happen. Thanksgiving is in 2 weeks and Penny is stuck in Ireland doing research, your parents are visiting their friends in Spain for the holiday, and your siblings have their own families. You have never felt so alone in your life. 

You spent the next few hours moping around the house, waiting for Penny's call. You watched Joel's date pull into the driveway. Her and her fucking Lexus and her bouncy hair and her fucking heels. You head to the fridge to find whatever intoxicating liquid you see first, but then you have a better idea. If he can have fun, you should too. You take a quick everything shower, spritz your favorite all over, and throw on a mini dress with some black heels. You call a taxi and grab your clutch. 

The taxi pulls up a few minutes later. “The closest bar, please. One with music,” you say, and the taxi pulls off.

[moonyasnow]

Woe! Unfortunate magical accident upon ye, your OC has now been cursed to share pain with their beloved 🔗🤝It's a good thing either of them are not clumsy or accident-prone - unless? Oh no! Hopefully they can find someone who can undo this pesky spell, or just to keep them company until it wears off!

-🔮✨diodellet (hopefully im doin this magic nonon thing right)

Oh

Malleus and Irina sharing pain

...

OH

MALLEUS AND IRINA SHARING PAIN

; ; dio I am so so so sorry this is probably not what you signed up for asking this but uhhhhhh

CW : SELF HARM

Also gonna say right now idk wtf is going on with the structure, or...anything, here? I just kinda...wrote stuff 0 editing

Irina has had a habit, ever since she was little. Not a very good habit, not at all...but one she relied on.

When she felt horrible, as she did often, when her bad emotions and feelings overwhelmed her and became too much for her small body to handle...the only thing she could think to do to release the massive tension boiling under her skin was to hurt herself.

She'd bite herself: bite her lip, and her fingers, and the side of her hands that attatched her thumb to the rest of it. She'd scratch at her scalp and shake her head around trying desperatly to will away the bad thoughts, to just get them all to stop

It was the only thing a young, neglected child who'd never been to school could think to do to release that explosive energy inside her; to direct it outward. But at herself, so no one would notice anything breaking. She couldn't scream, or her parents would become mad at her. She couldn't kick something, or throw something-- she barely even had anything to throw, either. But she could bite. Even as a small child, for that was how she survived physically unscathed in that household, knew better than to try to bite either of her parents.

And biting her plush rabbit Clover, her best friend, was something she'd rather die than do. Clover always comforted her.

So of course...the only remaining target was herself.

And when she bit her hands, bit them hard until they bled, no one would notice her crying.

Even as she went on to live at an orphanage after her mother died and father left at age 9, and even after she was adopted by her uncle and moved in with him at age 13, she kept this habit up.

The pain was familiar. The only anchor she had to cling to when everyone she even thought about trusting kept on leaving her. All for those giant emotions, how scared she was of them doing just that.

She found catharsis in exchanging the emotional pain for the physical pain.

She'd never told anyone about it. She needed to hide it, like she'd always hid everything that could be considered 'bad' about her, so no one would have any reason to dislike her. To survive. And...because she was ashamed. She thought the scars it left on her hands and arms made her 'dirty'.

Something happened-- a mistake in a class shared with the 3d and 2nd years. Someone stumbled, and the spell they meant to cast came out wrong, and accidentally hit Malleus.

Normally he would have moved out of the way in time, but being preoccupied as he was both with casting his own spell, and devoting all his mental focus to thinking of something entirely different, someone entirely different, he was, for once, caught off guard, and swerved too late, a tiny spark of said spell grazing him. But that was enough, apparently.

The spell was one meant to link one of the senses of the one it was cast on, and a person they were thinking of.

Malleus didn't think much of it, knowing it would wear off by itself in time, only making note to be more careful than usual so as not to cause Irina pain. Since he didn't think it would come up he didn't tell her about it.

But later that night...

He felt invisible nails draw harshly across his lower arms, yet when he uncuffed his sleeve to check, he saw nothing. But he felt it. Nails scraping painfully across his skin. And then nails digging into the flesh near his elbow, and a sharp yet also crushing sensationg weighting down on the side of his thumb. Crushing, crushing, crushing down harder and harder until he felt a sickening feeling of flesh being torn open.

In an instant, flecks of green light surged around him and the scents of wet stone and burning wax of his room gave way to the musty odor of an old, off-green house of wood.

Not even reacting to Tomoe's yelp of surprise, he asked her where Irina's room was, having never been inside the building himself before. She said she'd go to get Irina, and he agreed.

Though the pain he felt persisted, no new pain came.

Seeing Grim run down the stairs a short while before Tomoe and Irina, Malleus' pupils narrowed into dangerous slits at the little fire-eared monster, thinking him the culprit.

Thinking he wanted to go on one of their usual nightly walks, Irina just slipped on her shoes and jacket after greeting him, asking if he wanted to go for a walk.

That may not have been why he came there...but who was he to deny her? So as fae cannot tell lies, he simply answered with his honest thoughts: "That would be lovely."

Seeing her outwardly perfectly fine, he started to wonder if perhaps he'd imagined it, or had mistaken something. Perhaps she hadn't been attacked by anyone, and had just gotten her hand hurt on accident?

She walked closer to him than usual that night...but he didn't notice until he felt her small hand slipping into his. When he looked back to her, he found his gaze met with just the mop of her messy, pale pink hair, her face lowered to face the ground to a degree where he couldn't see it. But feeling the hesitant grip on his hand, he closed his fingers over hers and squeezed gently, even as it caused pain to shoot through his hand again.

Throughout their walk, her grip on his hand slowly became tighter and tighter, and his responded in turn, until their hands were clasped so tightly it was almost painful in itself. Thought they both wore gloves, they held on tightly enough that he could feel her heartbeat through her hand, and feel it gradually slow over the course of their walk.

When they'd gotten back to Ramshackle and it was time to say goodbye, he kissed the back of her hand before he left. And with it and the flurry of fireflies, the pain on his hand vanished, the vision of her face a moment after.

In the time until the spell wore off, every time he sensed something similar, without fail, he would appear at Ramshackle and invite her out on a walk.

He didn't know the origin of the pain...but he decided he'd take it away, and replace it with his hand enveloping hers.

@diodellet

[godilovecinnamon222]

how to surv1ve thanksgiving and christmas d1nn3r with an 3d mini guide!

disclaimer:

i am by no means encouraging anyone to st4rv3 or to follow this guide, i made it hoping that it would reach the people that know they'll be struggling at holidays and that need this help. i know how scary and how hard it is to try and keep an 3d a secret, this is supposed to help the people that need to know how to avoid the judgement and the oddly terrifying questions that get thrown at them.

how to prepare:

i would say there's 2 ways to go about the day before the d1nn3r, e4ting so that you won't p4ss out infront of your entire family, or f4$ting, this is really up to you. i have a pretty good tolerance for not p4$sing out so i will probably be f4$ting but it's totally your choice!! you can also try and calculate how much your going to e4t and burn c41s according to that (i'll list basic f00ds and numbers at the bottom)

"why is there like nothing on your plate??"

first off the best way to avoid this entirely is to just make a plate, i'd rather avoid people finding out so i can keep doing what im doing

for your plate (if you make one) load it up with tonsss of vegetables or fruit but i feel like fruit is never really served tbh, and some meat bc yay protein, sometimes ill throw a roll on there to make my plate look a little better but i don't ever really eat it, my whole family thinks im a very picky e4ter and they know i dont like thanksgiving food so im typically able to get away with throwing out f00d. and family dinners are so chaotic that people don't even realize sometimes.

you can also cut your f00d up and reshape it etc (yall know this meathod 🙏) to make it look like you at3, mashed potatoes are very easy to spread around and make them look like less. here's some excuses you can use to respond to the question:

" oh i atę earlier!!" this is a classic obviously but if your with people before hand e4t a little something in front of them and really make sure they notice.

" i dont feel to good right now."

" im not super hun6ry" also a classic but in classics we trust!

"last time i atę ____ it made feel really sick"

" oh i'm allergic to ____" allergies are a solid excuse but i wouldn't use it unless you actually have them

" gotta save room for dessert!!" don't worry i'll also be explaining how you can get through that to

dessert:

i feel like this is almost more stressful than the main meal, honestly me and my favorite cousin walk like crazy when ever we're together so sometimes i get lucky and miss dessert and than it sits out but there's no one really makeing me ęat it, for our family dessert is mostly optional and my mom knows i don't like e4tin6 a ton of junk so she won't suspect anything but if your family's forcefull here's a few things you can do:

-go for something that you know is lower in c41s or a safe f00d for you

-have very tiny servings

- bake something yourself so you know exactly what your getting

-talk about how full you are while your eating dinner so people think less at dessert

" i might have something in a little bit!!" try to avoid saying things about f00d, like im still full from dinner or im letting my f00d settle, because than you won't have to deal with "but you barely 4tę anything!!"

know what your 3ating:

all of these are measured by the s3rving siz3 (also going to be listed) they may also vary depending on brands, ingredients, toppings, blah blah blah you guys probably know that. this is basically just a rough estimate

cranberry suace: 86 c41s, one slice (about 8 slices per can take that as you will)

- mashed potatoes: 214 c41s (1 cup)

- sweet potato casserole: 235 c41s (1 cup)

- green bean casserole: 200-230 c41s ( a little under 1 cup)

- green beans: 31 c41s (1 cup)

- broccoli: 31 c41s (1 cup)

- asparagus: 32 c41s (10 spears)

- mac and cheese: 310 c41s(1 cup)

- turkey: 240 c41s (1 cup)

- gravy: 36 c41s (3 tbs)

- stuffing: 300-400 c41s (1 cup)

- rolls: 80-150 c41s (one roll)

- pumpkin pie: 300-450 c41s (one slice)

- apple pie: 300-450 c41s (one slice)

- pecan pie 400-500 c41s (one slice)

these f00ds are mostly for thanksgiving because the whole holiday is centered around f00d and i actually despise that, let me know if i missed anything you want me to add to the list or if any of these are incorrect!!

with all of that said, if you enjoy thanksgiving or anything to do with f00d in general, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!!! no matter where you stand your 3d is still valid. so if you choose to try and make the best of the holidays to whatever extent that may be go right ahead and don't let anyone else stop you, make your self a plate of your your favorite things and go back for dessert twice if that's what you choose, one day won't ruin every step of progress you made, as long as you don't loose yourself entirely you will be ok!!

no matter who you are or how your struggling, your 3d is valid, good luck, be safe, and happy holidays!!!

[xxplastic-cubexx]

cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..

[sallytwo]

Jennifer nearly jumped into the water / and she was tired like no one's ever been tired

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

[girlivealwaysbean]

i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point

[autumnoakes]

can i say it now?

sage of time/time powers didn't make sense for totk zelda. at ALL.

when in botw, before the calamity, in aoc, did she EVER show an affinity for time powers? i get that it was like this sort of. hidden power kind of thing, but it still doesn't make much sense. not for zelda.

[luvbug724]

jerejean warriors i respect and i love you i truly do but how did that pairing even get so big while jeanee has 45 fics total. again i truly love and respect u however i wish i could take some of the jerejean fame and transmute it to jeanee.... i want what u have

[kingprinceleo]

Oh fuck me fuckme fuck me

[astrangeghost]

(looking out a bus window dramatic style) i wish i wasnt the only lesbian in the entire world

[novampiresremain]

hello long vent / kinda updates ( in tags for both ) & also i love you all sm

[danielnelsen]

so if you romance and ascend astarion you can kick him in the balls when he tries to turn you and it’s just very funny, he’s so pissy about it. so much for the most powerful vampire of all time or whatever, he stamps around like a toddler and then leaves forever

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[northern-passage]

Genuine thought as a fellow trans dude, I’ve seen a lot of (obviously non-serious) questions on other blogs about characters’ genitals such as “how does it look like?” and similar, and I think we all know & understand that such questions are extremely inappropriate to ask and (I hope) no one would actually go around asking these questions irl. Idk, I think we should treat trans characters just like cis ones, without any special “precautions”, so to normalise them and not make cis people treat them like fragile boxes, a thing which happens to a lot of us irl. Hope this doesn’t come off as an attack or anything lol.

no worries, i didn't take this as an attack at all. i actually agree with you, that's why i mentioned feeling conflicted about it and also mentioned that i've changed my stance on how i felt about handling Noel and Clementine in game and in explicit intimate scenes.

however, for me the problem comes from the fact that people... don't ask these kinds of questions about cis characters? i suppose people do get cheeky "who is the biggest 🤪" asks but i would hardly compare the two. to be a bit crude, no one is going to be asking if a cis character has a dick or not, or "what does it look like". of course it's natural for people to be curious, and i honestly encourage the open discussion and am happy to see trans bodies being talked about more in a positive way, but not everyone is going to be comfortable with it due to the inescapable transphobia online and in the community. sending me that kind of ask is like sending out an invitation for a debate or a discussion that i don't necessarily want to have. i also just don't think people should default to asking a random IF author on tumblr dot com to describe what bottom growth looks like.

and with most of these asks typically coming from someone who is anonymous, i have no way of truly knowing what the tone is, what their intentions are or why this is being asked - is it another trans person? or maybe someone who is just genuinely curious? or, more likely in my experience, is it someone who is going to immediately follow up this message with something transphobic after i answer? do i want to roll the dice and find out?

so while i agree with what you're saying, it's important to consider the context and the reality we live in. the IF community is not kind to trans people or trans characters. and as a trans person, my first priority is protecting myself and my mental health. so what i mean when i say "precautions," is that those precautions are for me, because i've had to deal with transphobic harassment here for years now, and i try to mitigate it as much as i can. it's also for my personal comfort - again, to be blunt, i'm simply just not comfortable discussing a trans character's genitals with anonymous strangers on the internet. it makes me feel vulnerable.

also i do want to say i didn't mean for any of that to come across as a dig at other authors - if you're comfortable answering those kinds of questions, that's really only something you can decide for yourself. like i said, this is just coming from my own experiences in IF and for my own personal comfort - i have previously talked a lot about trans stuff and gender and sexuality here, when i'm feeling up to it, but it is something that is very draining for me and can also be very upsetting.

basically: i do agree that it's important not to other trans characters or treat them any differently than cis characters, but i also think there are ways to do it that don't require me answering invasive questions or questions that i don't feel comfortable with as a real life trans person, you know what i mean?

[biblicalhorror]

Thinking about my Rook hours </3