#im so tired of fucking up and making other people suffer
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jellyfishjams · 10 months ago
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xicanaroja · 9 days ago
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I think its very telling of the liberal frame of mind that now that Trump has won again, there are multiple creators on tiktok teaching people how to migrate/leave the country. As if that's an option for everyone?? Like who is that advice for. The vast majority of us cannot afford to pick up and leave, find a residency in another country and jobs that can support ourselves/families, work through the citizenship process, and then get nationalized? It's an expensive process, most countries require either a parent born on the land or that you own land and live there for 5+ years, AND again, expensive as all shit??? Like what are we to do. We literally cant all leave. Many of us know people who wouldn't even be eligible to immigrate elsewhere, since some countries have Actual Health parameters you have to meet to migrate (see Australia not allowing diagnosed autistics to immigrate). Not to mention friends and family members who are immigrants working through the process here in the US still. That's not an option for most people. It's just giving white-liberal, one intersectionality per person vibes. Its stupid, and reductive.
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anxiously-sidequesting · 11 months ago
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So I don't know if it was ever revealed how Duncan felt when we killed Malistaire all three times but I'm wondering if maybe some part of him could hate us for that too. Like you hear that and you go "but why. Malistaire was terrible and even Duncan knew that(?). Why would he hate you for getting rid of him."
But like I think it's so....... interesting in a very, very, very sad way how Duncan so easily latches onto anyone who directly feeds into his delusions of grandeur. And that's no fault of his own that he was manipulated by the nasty Schism but when you think about how desperately clung to the idea that Malistaire, easily one of the greatest necromancers any of us had ever heard of (at that time), somehow actually recognized Duncan's talents (even when canon supports that Duncan wasn't all that talented, at least no more than the next necromancer) and then praised him for it so often that Duncan believed that he would be the next Death Professor is. I mean ☹️
So like with that mindset I unfortunately feel like it would be quite easy to twist even Malistaire's death as something that's horrible and awful and all our fault. ESPECIALLY if the Schism was feeding into Duncan's already broken mind and shattered ego and was constantly telling him that everything bad that ever happened to him ever in his life was Our Fault. That's like a realistic conclusion that someone like Duncan could come to
And like, at this point in time, are Malistaire's crimes even a factor in how he thinks????? Was Duncan ever able to separate Malistaire's talent and skills and prowess from the terrible and awful things he did? If Duncan wasn't able to consciously tell that distinction in the first place I can't imagine it would be any better during the years he was being manipulated and isolated and lied to
Like in Duncan's mind it probably isn't, "maybe I shouldn't idolize a national criminal, or idolize anyone at all for that matter, and aspire to be like someone so harmful when I can recognize my own talent and build from there" it's probably more like, "you (the wizard) permanently got rid of a brilliant mind, an innocent person who just made a few mistakes, and someone who believed in me no matter what just so that you could be the better than me and loved by everyone else" and that's! very sad actually!
#this is all speculation btw idk if any of this is canon. how duncan feels about all this#i know i keep saying the exact same shit over and over but.... really not a fan of how the game handled duncan! sorry!#i know wizard101 isnt supposed to be about every single character gets a satisfying ending to their arc-#-meaning not everyone in the story will face consequences and/or find a happy ending and like thats fine they dont need to#but idkkkk its just imo really sad how essentially a kid suffers frrom something he cant control by himself (his ego)-#and then instead of getting help he is instead ignored (ambrose) and then manipulated and brought up by a cult#and then when it becomes super apparent how... TERRIBLE his life really is and we defeat him he just... goes back??????#we.... we LET him go back???? i mean we're not responsible for other people's bad decisions or mental health but bro....#and then when we tell ambrose he's just like “oh. too bad. well anyways-” AND IM LIKE WELL THATS THE REASON!!!!! NO WONDER HE'S FUCKED UP#NONE OF THIS IS ADDRESSED. NONE OF IT. WE KICK DUNCAN'S ASS AND THEN HE.... GOES BACK TO THE CABAL#i literally just got so desolate when (wallaru spoilers) because. okay. all that for nothing i guess#this isnt me being mad btw LMAO i know the tone probably reads as angry but im not im just disappointed#and tired. what is it with wizard101 in particular and just people suffering with no end. (me as i make my main suffer with no end)#but anyways yeah duncan has been in my head for a while. he's one of the guys that i love a lot BDKSNSKAJ#he's like a son to me and HE NEEDS A HEALTHY PARENT. HE NEEDS IT#not excusing his actions btw. he still committed crimes JRKDJSIEJ#i just have a soft spot for those villains in media who are doomed from the start yknow. (stares tearfully at morganthe and gf spider)#wizard101#wiz101#w101#text posts#duncan grimwater#im not normal about duncan at all he's probably the wozard oc i feel for the most other than malorn and us
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trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.
vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍
#sorry bros im about to ventpost in these mf tags 👍#im so fucking tired man. im already suicidal to begin with but the Everything happening is making it Worse. Yippe Yahoo Hooray.#therapy in a week though so ive got that at least.#this is the worst time of year for shit to go south.but Uh Oh saying that makes me feel like a selfish fuckass because other people -#- have it worse. like. god fucking damn. i get Extra suicidal around september -> march range sure. but other people are literally suffering#like as we fucking speak. and ive done fuckall to help cause i dont know HOW to help. but thats not a fucking excuse#im just being comfortable in my lazy ass depression spiral cause im a selfish fucking prick. “i cant spare the energy to vett things”#other people are fucking dying and im over here like “noo im too tiwed :( i cant do anyfing so im not gona do anyfing cuz im wazy and tiwed”#what the fuck is wrong with me lmao. knowing me im not gona change shit anyway despite fucking complaining about it cause im just. fucking#Like That.#idk. i was reblogging some of those “hold in there dont kill yourselves” posts cause like. yk. suicide bad or fucking whatever. but someone#on this site said something along the lines of “ok but how many people reblogging/posting these told jews to kill themselves” and like.#i dont know. i dont fucking know dude. so i guess im not reblogging Those anymore.#theres bigger issues out there and here i am focusing on some queer people who might kill themselves. idk. i should just join them yk#cause i never fucking focus on the bigger shit cause “i dont know how” and “i dont want to make things worse so i just wont do anything” so#im not doing fuckall other than just being part of the fucking problem here.#i should probably just delete social media for a while and see from there.#or just fucking drink about it thats the other option. its worked for me before (lie) so i may as well do it again am i right#im sorry i never like. boost gofundmes or fundraisers and shit i just.#i dont have a fucking excuse. im just a lazy fucking bastard in my own stupid fucking comfort circle.#“oh no seeing that people are dying makes me uncomforyable :(” ok well people are fucking dying you self absorbed douchebag. why cant you#get off your stupid fucking ass and do something. get a job so you can fucking help people or *something#its not like you have to pay rent and shit.#<- all about myself. cause yk. self centered douchbag. hooray.#i dont pay rent and i dont have to pay for my own food. i still live with my parents. im fucking useless to society so i may as well get a#job and send the money i dont fucking need to somrone who DOES need it. but here i am.#in.my stupid fucking bed til noon cause “the world is scary and jobs are hard :(”#its fucking retail. retail isnt as fucking hard as like. construction and shit but here i am anyway “unable” to do shit.#i fucking could if i just fucking ballsed up and put up with shit. but no. here i fucking am going “nooo i should just kill myself instead”#vent post
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marauderingminnie · 3 months ago
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So much of the current marauders fandom controversy wouldn’t even exist if people just tagged their posts right 😭😭
#And if we stopped sending death threats to people I think that would be really cool!!!!#I’m very likely going to delete this post soon because I’m afraid of having it up and I don’t usually talk about controversies and shit#and I want to make it clear that I’m approaching this from a completely neutral point of view!!#so without further ado#in my humble opinion it is absolutely 100% so very valid so so fair absolutely okay for somebody to hate on a ship there’s no issue in that#just tag that it’s hate#It’s so very valid so very okay to like a ship and want to post about it#just use the right tags#don’t tag a ship that isn’t relevant#it’s so very totally okay and so very valid for you to be really fucking tired and really fucking annoyed with seeing a bunch of shit about#tags and characters that you don’t like or support and it’s totally fair that you don’t want to see it anymore#that’s the fault of the people making those posts and if you’re one of those people? use the right fucking tags#if you wanna hate - hate#if you wanna love - love#but no amount of loving or hating part of a fandom based on FICTIONAL MEDIA is justification for sending literal death threats#to real fucking people#there could be a child who has suffered from thoughts of suicide or sh on the other side of the phone that you’ve just sent death threats t#and that child could then be so frightened by what they’ve been sent or they could start believing that they deserve it#and then you would be the cause of irreversible damage to a literal fucking child#And the thing is that that’s literally just an example and there are hundreds upon hundreds of other people with different situations#whether that be adults and people who’ve never suffered with such thoughts etc#who could be affected just as badly if not worse#and that’s all because you got angry about a fictional fucking universe#from a completely neutral point of view I think it’s very reasonable to hate on a ship or a character etc#and I think there should be a place for that hate to be put online because at the end of the day thats part of what fandom internet is for#but that hate shouldn’t be directed towards real people (except for JK Rowling I think we can all agree she’s an exception)#and quite simply it should be tagged#IM GOING TO CONTINUE THESE IN REBLOGS I DIDNT KNOW THAT THERE WAS A TAG LIMIT#tw sui implied#marauders era
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insanecreetur · 5 months ago
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I absolutely hate being confrontational or bringing up any issues or worries I have but I have SO. MANY. i'm always anxious about everything everyone is doing to and around me. Why does it feel like I'm being lied to and manipulated 24/7 ??
I know it's because I literally was. for years. but fuck pls brain we're doing better now we're not in those fucking houses anymore we don't have to see or hear them anymore... but then why is it still affecting me so badly?
Surely everyone can't be as bad as they all were... right?
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littletrumpetcat · 4 months ago
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tired of this man tired of putting up with him 24/7 tired of hearing his TV that's so loud i can hear it from outside the house and clear through my bedroom. tired of hearing his f*x news dribble, tired of walking past the TV and hearing some right wing lunatic speaking. tired of walking into the basement and the TV is so loud it physically hurts my ears. tired of him not understanding what i'm saying because of his lack of hearing aids and his refusal to listen to what other people are saying. tired of him expecting everyone to do his bidding. right after i get home from an 8 and a half hour day he casually says "it's just about time for the dogs to go out by the way.." as i'm petting them like are u kidding me. do it urself, u are retired. tired of my mom asking someone to take the dogs out as i'm getting ready to leave for work, only for him to look at me and smirk like are you really that dense and entitled?
#can't do anything about it#if i text him asking him to turn it down he turns it off and throws a temper tantrum#and says 'i can't wait until you go back to college'#i ruined his new years eve bc it was 10 pm and i was tired of hearing his loud as fuck TV with his 6 speaker surround sound setup#like there's no volume down button the remote i guess#it's either down or off#and this has been my entire life lol. was torture when he'd order himself a brand new flat screen tv (while being jobless) and his tv would#be so loud it'd vibrate the walls. he'd watch bigbrother and we'd hear the contestants whispering clear as day#like it was so loud#idk dude i just can't#i want to live at home after college so i can not have to pay rent but this is just suffering dude#it's madness#also his absolute refusal to listen to other people#meant#when i made dinner i had a plate of tacos and a plate of 2 chicken quesadillas and i explained which was which and said he can take a taco#and a quesadilla as well as the side dish#and he just took the whole plate of tacos lmfao#does not listen to other ppl#he also just. expects ppl to make his plate and bring it downstairs for him#ugh idk im just tired of it#but housing at my university over the summer is so incredibly expensive#despite the apartments being built in the 1940s and 1960s and being neglected by the university#$200 a week and u can only work 20 hours a week over the summer#i make $10 an hour which is more than a majority of on campus positions#so like. do u just want students to not use ur housing over the summer? it's fucked up
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catfishofoldin99colours · 5 months ago
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mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Bad.
#catfish speaks#catfish complains#been. a rough day#not world ending. but certainly not Good#had a vehicular argument with a tesla driver on the way to work which put me in a Bad fucking mood#im so goddamn tired still from the last few weeks anf going to bed late last night (my fault but still)#work was. so fucking overstimulating holy shit#lights were Too bright there was no music i should not have been around people at all#the credit card thingy was So frustrating and wouldn't work#other work is so tiring and i know im being held to high standards and deadlines for it which#sucks#then checked my uni grades and i fucking bombed the course i did last semester#like Badly i wasn't even close to the actual pass mark i was way off#and like. that was one course. on its own. that i enjoyed and did put effort into#and im wondering#is my degree That important#i have a job. i can do interviews and practical experience. im smart and capable.#i have a decent support network in my parents financially (loathe as i am to use it)#if i genuinely am too exhausted to actually be engaged in academics or actyally try.#what thr fuck is the point of suffering and accruing more university debt#ive been here six years. its not going away.#i want to LIVE my LIFE#i don't want to be studying forever#i want to actually genuinely for real drop out and leave it behind#i tried i failed. sorry but its not working. i have things id rather be doing instead#and i KNOW so many people are going to say 'oh don't make such a drastic decision so quickly'#this is has been like 3 years coming honestly#i have considered this multiple fuckin times#and WHY should my suffering be so necessary to any potential benefits that the goivernment keeps fucking over anyway#uni debt keeps building. indexation went way the fuck up recently
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dragons-and-yellow-roses · 11 months ago
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Gonna complain in the tags
#i am in so much pain right now i almost want to die about it tbh#i suspect i have an ear infection and it is some of the worst pain ive ever been in#i can hardly breathe through it. if that makes sense#i cant go to sleep. i wake up in pain. im taking eight ibuprofen at a time every two hours#i know thats bad for me. but it was the only thing that was helping#but now the ibuprofen has stopped helping and the pain is getting worse and ive been suffering like this for two weeks#so i finally decided to make what may be a crippling financial decision#and im gonna go to urgent care tomorrow#and hopefully theyll help with this incessant fucking pain#also it's made it so i cant hear out of my right ear which is super inconvenient#also its my birthday. and im spending it in so much pain that i cant concentrate on anything else#also the other day i found out my best friwnd and my ex girlfriend have been fucking#so im not talking to my best friend for now. i dont know if i will ever want to again#and my ex tried to call me earlier and just recently sent me a snapchat that i havent looked at#those are the two people i want to speak to LEAST in the world right now. im angry and i hate them a little bit#and im in so much pain and i cant hear and im so tired#being in this much pain tires you out so much#like my body is under so much stress that i have no energy to do anything except be in pain#yesterday i woke up at 9am to take out the dog. then went back to sleep until 5pm. after getting a full night's sleep#i have to work tomorrow and its gonna be a long fucking day and i cant hear out of my right ear and everything hurts#and i hate the people i thought i would love forever#so fuck me i guess. happy fucking birthday
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sh1-n0bu · 6 months ago
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♡︎ 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 ♡︎
characters: AFAB!sub!jing yuan, dan heng, blade x gn!dom!reader
warnings: AFAB characters, overstimulation, headcannon+small drabble format, praise, degrading, cock/strap traditions, dacryphilia, usage of bullet vibrator, slight brat taming, nipple stimulation, fingering, oral, cervix fucking, begging, squirting, clit pinching, cock/strap warming, size kink, belly bulge, breeding, creampie, mating press, full nelson, just a personal headcannon of how i think they would act when overstimulated
notes: someone wrote “nobody writes ahegao quite like nobu does” in one of their repost tags and im fucking shitting tears😭😭
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the giggler
jing yuan loves to be overstimulated. he loves the feeling of it, the adrenaline rush, the high, the feeling of finally cumming all over your fingers, tongue, strap whatever it may be and the feeling of you continuing to move, drawing out his orgasm while also driving him into an overstimulated mess
has the cutest giggles and laughs when he gets too much pleasure. he doesn’t even try to hide or won’t even try to hide it. why would he when you were making him feel so good over and over again? hell, he even wants other people to hear it, to remind them that you were his lover and only his. and how only he gets to feel the overwhelming amount of pleasure only you can bring to him and no one else
but, it comes with a catch. he needs a lot of foreplay and/or teasing and/or orgasm denial for him to finally cave in and shake his head before starting to blabber incoherent shit about how good your cock feels inside his gushing pussy, how he could feel your tip fucking his cervix, how he wanted you to fuck a baby inside him etc etc
and i mean a LOT of it
as a centuries old war hardened general, it’s safe to say that he had gotten used to some feelings and emotions. pleasure being one of them
so if you want to get him to break and to become absolutely dumb and drunk on lust and pleasure, you have to tease him a lots before getting into it. if not, he will somehow find a way to outsmart you and take the reigns. he’s a bit of a brat and a spoiled prince wrapped up into one after all
will tell you what to do and how to do it if you have failed in getting him needy in your foreplay. he will fist your hair and thrust his hips into your mouth, making you unable to breath for a moment or two with his clit right at your nose. will push you down and flip your positions so he could ride your face, all the while chuckling at your cute attempt to push him back down. a goddamn brat and he will show it to the fullest when you fail at your foreplay
did i mention he was a brat? well now i have. a fucking brat to the max and he isn’t ashamed of it. will definitely question your power in the bedroom, try to overpower you and he will. he literally swings a 7000kg glaive in one hand like its nothing and he will show it by throwing you around. gently and consensually of course, he wouldn’t want to hurt his beloved
but fully expect him to be cocky and devious. “can you say no to my pretty pussy?”, “so sleepy. oh sorry, i didn’t know your cock was inside me hehe”, “was that all?” you get the gist. will shamelessly yawn in the middle of fucking not because he is sleepy or tired, but simply because he is a brat. a goddamn brat
so, how can you get him to be needy and won’t make him go into his bratty side? simple. shove a long distance controlled vibrator inside his cunt and leave it there for the whole day for him to suffer at work. but if you’re going to do that, be sure to mute the ringtone for your phone for the day since he will call you, send you messages, pictures, videos every damn hour. the closer his hour for shift ending comes, the more frequent the buzzing of your phone will become because he will grow much more needier
when finally he’s back home and frantically pawing at your pants when barely through the doors, that’s when you know he had absolutely no intention of being a brat. how can he when his whole pants were slowly getting stained from his multiple orgasms?
when he’s gladly bending himself over, arching his back for you as he wiggles his hips, he will ask you to come inside. jing yuan is great with kids and such a huge family man, he will ask you over and over repeatedly to breed him. cum inside him, fill up his cute dripping cunt, put him in whatever position you want and make sure to breed his pretty cunt, you can finally raise your own family together!
remember the long distance controlled vibrator i mentioned? make sure to keep it on and buzzing inside his cunt at all times when he’s away at work, or else it won’t work. during meetings or report hearings, jing yuan had to leave to the bathroom a lot of times and it genuinely got his subordinates concerned for his health. the red face, the heavy breathing and sometimes, the jolts of his body or the bleeding bruised lips of his made the cloud knights worry and some even suggested for him to leave the seat of divine foresight early to look after his health. if only they knew just how their dearest general was pathetically biting on his hand to muffle his screams in the bathroom as he squirted all over himself
“[naaammeee], ‘m mmgh♡︎! aaaaangh haah mngck♡︎♡︎ i-i’m home!” jing yuan’s voice called out, weak mewls of pleasure slipping through as he collapsed onto the floor the moment the doors of your shared home was closed. desperately humping the floor, trying to push the vibrator deeper into his gushing pussy, your lover didn’t realize that you were leaning against the wall of the kitchen, watching him with a knowing smile. there was a wet patch growing in his usual red pants, growing more and more the further he humped the air in desperation. see? your tough brat was so easy to tame.
“you feeling okay, darling?” you call out, taking out the controlled from your pants pocket and messing with the switch. flipping it up, down, up to the highest level, before going to the lowest level. it was cute to see the ever so tough brat turn into a delirious mess from just a single small toy. all because he was being so stubborn about how you weren’t the boss of him. walking over to where he was kneeling on the floor, you reach your free hand out. tilting his head up, a thumb swiping away at the drool that was beginning to pool on his lower lip, you tilt your head to the side, asking the question again with a firm hold onto his chin.
“n-no…! no no no, not at aamgh♡︎♡︎ h-hhaaaggm not at all♡︎!” he shakes his head viciously, dragging out his words and tripping over them with moans and mewls falling in between. pathetically, he tugs on the hem of your pants, trying to get to his favorite treat, the one thing he’s been missing this whole day.
“n-need you… need you right now, need your—♡︎♡︎! need yo-our..! c-cock right now...♡︎!” jing yuan mutters between whimpers, finally, his shaky hands manage to pull down your pants and undergarments just enough to have your strap out. a needy whine falling as he places slobbering wet kisses on the tip, giving it a few licks as he flutters his lashes at you in an effort to manipulate you to give him what he was non-verbally asking.
knowing full well that he wouldn’t take no for an answer and that yanqing might come home soon, you drag him up to his feet — an action that was heavily protested against as jing yuan cries out after his favorite treat being taken away. once inside the comfort of your shared bedroom, by the time you have locked the door behind you, he was already naked. clothes messily strewn on the floor and on the bed, the many orgasm’s slick dripping down his puffy cunt to his ass and to the bedsheets eventually. you could see the light trembling of his pussy lips, an action caused by the vibrator fucking away inside him still.
turning the vibrator off, you take the toy out of his puffy cunt. jing yuan let out a drawn out mewl at the feeling, clenching around nothing as he tries to replace the empty feeling for something, anything. but seeing you starting to strip, he knew what he wanted. and he knew how he wanted it.
spreading his legs open further, his hand comes down, flicking at his enlarged clit with a jolt before spreading open his labia for you to take in how he was already so needily wet and dripping for you. a drunk giggle escaping him when the tip of your cock is right against his folds, wiggling his hips enticingly.
“[nnaameeee]~ you gotta fuck a baby in me this time, owhkayyy?♡︎♡︎ hehehe♥︎”
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the crybaby
the cutest out of all three of them, in my personal opinion
he just gets overstimmed so easily and quickly, it’s adorable in the way that he brokenly begs for a moment of respite. legs shaking, smaller body jolting violently at the smallest of touches like your hand ghosting over his hardened nipples. don’t even get me started on the way he cutely squeals out loud when you pinch his clit augh
maybe it’s due to his nature as a vidyadhara and not a full human but every little touch is received with so much sensitivity and sensuality, it gets so easy to turn him into a blabbering mess in record time. push his smaller body against the wall and finger his gushing pussy while rolling your thumb over his clit. in no time, his legs are shaking as he bites your hand, his orgasm washing over him quickly and violently. but don’t just stop there, keep flicking at his clit, pinch it, tug on it, push a hand on the small bulge on his belly and he’ll be left sobbing by the second or third round
he’s noticeably smaller than the other two and it carries out into his size kink so well. he just wants to be pushed around and put into impossible, near painful positions and man-handled until he’s left a blabbering idiot
make him cockwarm you while asking him to read you a story or a book under the guise that you had a nightmare and can’t fall asleep without his soothing voice and soft cunny wrapped around your cock. at first he’ll huff and puff, saying that you’re a liar and just wants to fuck him. four or five pages in and his voice is already strained, whines coming out as hiccups and sniffles follow soon after
but just because he’s a crybaby doesn’t mean he’s an idiot. he knows how much you love his pretty steel grey eyes unfocused and hazy, brimming with tears and he will use that to his advantage. will make sure to play with his nipples or push down on the bulge in his tummy when cockwarming you so he could get teary eyed quicker. the moment he sniffles and grinds himself down on you, he knows you’re a goner and would give him what he wants
he may be a crybaby, but he’s also a goddamn minx so beware of that
tugs on your sleeve so cutely, looking at you with a flushed face and stuttered words to ask you if you wanna spend time with him in his room. today’s trailblazing expedition was too long and tiring after all, “surely you would enjoy some cuddles…?” or “i just wanted to help you patch up your wounds. i was just worried”
yeah sure, dan heng. just say that you wanna get fucked until you’re squealing out like a slut with fat tears running down your cute red cheeks. thank the aeons the express’ walls are thick and soundproof. if not, who knows the amount of noise complaint you would have gotten from everyone
has slight oral fixation. slightly. but that’s only because he wants to see you crumble and give into his non-verbal demands and just ruin him. he’s a bit too shy to ask directly after all
long serpentine tongue wrapping around your strap, pulling it into his mouth. will gag and choke so loudly with the tip of the fat dildo pushed right down his throat, hitting his uvula and choking his throat. he can complain about sore throats and pained jaws all he wants but you both know that he loves to suckle on your strap with tears filling his eyes
the most messiest cock sucker and that’s saying something bc blade is the one who has the biggest oral fixation out of the three of them. he’ll place wet kisses to the weeping tip of your cock, running the slitted snake like tongue over the weeping slit of your cock teasingly before wrapping it around your dick. loves the scent and the taste of your pre, basically addicted to it as he opens his mouth wider, slipping your cock inside the warm cavern of his mouth inch by inch
but be aware that he will also try to take advantage of this position. he will try to bat his lashes at you so he can continue suckling on your strap like he would be sucking on a lolipop, all under the guise to ‘make you happy’. when in reality, he would try to make you cum over and over to try and get you overstimulated. when in such position, just fist his hair and fuck his throat. gets him crying in no time like the crybaby he is
“… bamboo whispers in the w-wind, a secret pa-aaangh! aah aaah hmgk♡︎ a s-secret pa-act... ♡︎!“ the soothing voice of your lover drawls out into a weak sniffle, hands gripping the book filled with love poetry from his home planet tightly. so tight, you feared that he might just tear the book apart with his claws. you had crawled into his bed yet again to torment him today, the dildo hitting all the sensitive spots in his gushing cunt, dan heng couldn’t help but weakly whine when your hands around his waist tightens to not let him move.
“go on. i’m listening” you coo out, forcing him to stay still on your lap while his voice continue to drawl out. sniffles and broken pleads replacing his ever so stoic mask, a voice that is usually so cold and distant, always scolding other turning into one of mindless blabber about how badly he wanted your strap to fuck his pussy. you couldn’t help but laugh.
“is that what it says on the pages? i may be still learning the strokes but the next line seems to be the stroke for two” you point at the kanji on the book he was holding in his shaking hands, the strokes of the language seeming familiar to you. it was an easy kanji to read after all. yet not to your boyfriend it seems.
“please! p-please please move! i beg you, [n-naamee]♡︎ you gotta fuck meeh♡︎ you gotta fuck me you gotta fuck me— you have to fuck meeegck—♡︎♡︎!!” dan heng squeals, shaking thighs bucking down onto your dick, trying to gain some friction. it was enough, he had read you hundreds of love poetries from his home planet. he had been taking your pronged torture for long enough, please just fuck his cunt already!
“so impatient” you huff, putting the book away with a book marker tucked between the pages before hooking your hands under his knees. pulling him up and over until dan heng was left wailing at the sudden change in position. hooking your arms under his knees, his legs are left dangling in the air with nothing to support himself but for his hands to cling to your biceps. even then, he couldn’t hold for long as he jolts about in your arms like a hopping bunny, painting your dildo in his cum when the tip kissed his cervix.
“guuchk♥︎!! d-deep! aah ah naahmg haah t-too deep♡︎♡︎ [n-name] you’re f-fucckk fuck fuck—♡︎♥︎ fucking my cerviinxx my ceerrvv—♡︎♡︎ mngh unngya♥︎!” punched out sobs comes from his pretty lips, drawling out into whiny cries when you move him up and down. you could see the bulge in his tummy appear and disappear every little moment. every jolt, every gasp, every little whiny cry making the bulge in his tummy to get more detailed. he was so adorably small.
“‘m sorry, darling. i’m sorry, didn’t mean it. didn’t mean to fuck you this deep” you coo out apologies, lifting him just a bit so your strap won’t sink so deep to the point it would kiss his cervix. as much as you loved your crybaby gasping and writhing, you didn’t want the reason for such reaction to be pain.
claws scratching at every inch of skin he could touch, jaw slack open in a silent scream, you could barely make out his shrill yell of what appears to be your name when dan heng squirts over your cock after just a few thrusts. you could see the overflowing amount of cum just dripping down your cock, trailing down to your legs and staining the mattress. with a click of your tongue, you pinched his clit, making the shorter man sniffle with a squeal.
“‘m soowryyy… sorry sorry—♡︎ d-didn’t mean to be bad... s-soowwh uunhg hyaagk ungc gugcck—♥︎♥︎!!”
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the hissy bitch
alright, so i know i’m going into territory that has been charted way too many times before by blade lovers standard but he def has piercings. on his nipples, tongue and on his clit. probably got the first three by losing a drunk bet or something or maybe he just wanted it but the last one, the clit one, is definitely his latest piercing. one that he got after his relationship with you began and he had made the sudden rash decision to get one so he could see your reaction and to feel you just messing with it while fucking him
there is a REASON why he always keeps his chest bandaged up. there is a goddamn reason and that reason is his nipple piercings and the fact that his chest is generally very sensitive im being delusional
so what does that bring and why have i specified it? simple. titty fucking. nipple stimulation. seeing his pretty big, round chest jiggle every time your cock sinks back into his dripping cunt. pinch it, roll it, tug on them, suckle on them, do anything to him with his nipple piercing and he’s scratching at your back, mauling it like an animal
the reason i see him as a hissy bitch is because he likes to throw small temper tantrums when he gets too overstimulated. he’s crying, begging, hitting your shoulders, back, scratching at them and leaving deep red scratch marks, perhaps even breaking the skin sometimes. how come blade get overstimulated quickly? because he is very touch deprived. he’s been alone and immortal for too damn long and his ass is fucking touch starved. i just know it in my bones
genuinely, he is indeed very touch starved. since his rebirth as an immortal, he had felt nothing but pain, anguish and suffering and therefore, has basically gotten immune to touches. especially the violent and bloody ones. but gentle, tender, affectionate ones? find him jumping away from your soft hands like a frightened cat, it’s goddamn heartbreaking. so when he finally gets his cunt fucked, blade would be overstimmed too fast due to receiving a sudden abundance of affection and touches
will shake his head ‘no’ when asked if you would wanna stop due to his tears. you were just concerned but blade didn’t wanted this onslaught of pleasure to stop. desperately rides your fingers, mouth, strap — anything. loves the feeling of being on top of you, gives him the slight feeling of being in control. until it all gets thrown out the window when you force him to stop bouncing, hands gripping his hips tightly as a warning. will whine and try to grind down, trying to chase that high again but will only end up with a pout and hissy tears falling down his cheeks
another one who loves the feeling of being stuffed full and overstimulated. it’s almost like he gets high from the feeling. loves having his pussy fucked in any way you please until he can’t stay on his hands or feet without shaking. it’s just so cute to see him shaking like a fawn when fucking him doggy style
prepare to have yourself used as a chew toy as well as a scratcher. blade’s almost like a cat, hissy and whiny but also so greedy and preferring certain things in certain manner. will bite at your shoulders, hands, fingers to muffle himself but also to try and get his shit together. will scratch at your back, thighs, wherever he could reach. such a spoiled brat
when eating him out, be sure to give an extra care and love to his clit piercing. constantly flicking it with your tongue would usually work though, gets his legs all shaky and jolty soon enough. maybe pair it with flicking his pierced nubs and bladie will be squirting into your mouth with an embarrassing high pitched shriek. make sure to clean up all of his mess before diving right back into his gushing cunny. he may not say it but he will expect you to go back to eating him out like he’s your last meal
has the BIGGEST oral fixation out of the three of them. like, down bad, delicious, scrumptious, sloppy oral fixation. and he is happy to give it 90% of the times due to his tongue piercing. knows how good it makes you feel and how you like to see his pretty face between your legs, sucking on the large dildo like his life depends on it. not a single thought or a single moment of choking from him, it’s almost like he doesn’t have a gag reflex
you just came back from mission, from being away from him even for a single day? unacceptable. let him bend over for you, you can get your stress out by fucking his already dripping wet pussy. too tired? that’s fine. take of your pants and get comfortable cuz’ he can stay between your legs for days
not a single minute of respite has greeted you ever since you came back from your latest mission, stepping foot into your shared home with your stoic lover. perhaps the single gentle kiss to your cheek before he started to leave slobbering wet kisses on your lips was the only warning and moment of rest you have gotten. not even shoes off yet and blade was already unbuckling your belt, giving you the puppy eyes and grumbling about how you’ve been away for too damn long. whining about how much he missed you and needed your strap to fuck him dumb. how his pretty pussy had missed you so much.
“n-nnghyaa♡︎♡︎ m-missed you... missed you s’ much, [name]! f-fuck me fuck me fuck me, fuck your favorite cunt gyyuck—♥︎♥︎ a-aaanh! haah ah ah mmngk—♡︎♥︎!!” unusually docile red eyes roll to the back of his skull, jaw going slack wide open as you push his legs up, feeling your strap hit him deeper than he thought was possible. he could feel your weight push him down, keeping it still on the bed and to stop him from wiggling his hips entirely. this new position caused his cat like pupils to widen, turning into heart shapes as you chuckle at the dazed look in his eyes.
“such a needy brat” you coo out in a condescending manner, pushing his legs up in the air with your hands hooked under his knees to keep him in place. pulling out until halfway out, you sink back into blade’s dripping cunt. a squeal tearing from his throat alongside the filthy wet squelch of his cunt tightening around your dildo. it was so easy to get him dumb.
“t-too nngh much! too muchtoomuchtoomuch♡︎! fucking m-my womb—♡︎ [n-name], y-youuwrr crush— crushing my wombgg aangh ah ah! gyyuck eengh aaangh nyaagh♥︎♥︎!!” the familiar feeling of his nails scratching at your arms takes place, tearing at the skin, clawing at any part of your body he can come in contact with. a desperate attempt to ground his already long gone mind, too deep into the throes of pleasure that he didn’t even realize his shaking hands were weakly pulling your hips to fuck deeper into his warm walls.
“don’t be so dramatic, bladie. i won’t be able to crush your womb in this position” you coo out mockingly, wiping away the fat globs of tears that continue to pour of his eyes. red and yellow eyes rolled to the back of his skull, wide open mouth letting out the most salacious squeals and shrieks of your name and how you were fucking his womb falling out. legs weakly dangling in the air, jolting and bristling at every deep thrust you fuck into his velvety walls. the lewd wet squelching noises were alongside your grunts and blade’s whiny sobs were the only noise in the room. you would probably get noise complaints the next morning due to blade’s loudmouthed blabbering self.
letting go of one of his legs, you shove your fingers into his mouth. almost as if it was an instinct, blade’s tongue wet your fingers. suckling on the two digits as it his life depended on it with the most cutest heart shaped pupils staring at you. once you deemed them wet enough, you take your fingers out of his mouth. an action that blade showed his hatred towards as his pierced tongue comes past his lips, trying to chase after your fingers.
“gghcck—♡︎♥︎♥︎♥︎!!” a sharp wail taking place as blade arches his back, his whole body shaking, soft big tits jiggling when you pinched at his pierced clit. rolling, tugging, flicking at the hardened nub as blade sobs about cumming before drenching your cock with his squirting. you had thought of him to be satisfied with it, but turns out you have underestimated your lover’s neediness when his strong scarred thighs comes to wrap around your waist, legs locked behind your back when you tried to pull out.
sigh… it’s times like this that makes you glad for your amount of stamina.
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b1adie · 4 months ago
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seeing ppl say shit like this drives me fucking wild ok like the twt one was a comment abt chris niosi and the tumblr one is obv about genshin’s racism and like. “ughhh im so tired of everyone getting mad at everything” ok so what should we do. should we just sweep it under the rug and smile and ignore serious issues so yooouuuu dont have to think about anything for once in your fucking life?? should people who are being hurt by these things just suck it up and be silent about their pain so you can play your little gacha game without feeling a little bit sad :(?
i honestly just don’t understand it. like people who are upset about sunday’s va MAYBE being recast, like, i understand having enjoyed his performance in the role, but doesnt knowing what you know now kind of ruin that for you? i also liked his performance, but knowing what i know now sours it for me.
sorry for venting just. omfg. seeing someone acting like “wahhh im so tired of having to be mildly inconvenienced by the pain of others, why cant everyone just suffer in silence so i dont have to feel any negative feelings ever” makes me want to rip them apart with meat hooks. ohhh your funny silly game time is slightly interrupted by having to hear about the trauma of abuse victims? thats so sad. even sadder than the actual fucking abuse those people experienced yeah for sure. go to hell
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firesnap · 9 months ago
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i have a genuine question. i promise i am not at all trying to defend him. ive dropped him entirely, literally deleted everything i had of him and unliked his songs.
ive just been wondering like considering that he has been in therapy, and also considering how if he does take a year off and then comes back, why cant it be redeemable? like cant people change? cant we give them second chances? he is 27. is he just doomed to be an abuser forever?
its just scary and im asking as like a younger person who is in my very early 20s. i know ive made mistakes. i know ive not been a good partner or friend sometimes. (and yes i was also abusive to a past partner...im not proud of it and ive learned from it. i have never ever touched anyone in that way after that. it took awhile but my current relationship isnt toxic and i would never hurt anyone or hit them again yknow?) and it scares me that people keep insinuating that he is irredeemable. like cant abusers change and become better? dont they get second chances? if shelby has grown and healed in 10 months wouldn't it be fair to say the same for wilbur?
im just genuinely asking because based on everything i believe you are older than me and im looking for guidance and just...idk im scared. growing up on the internet has made me so scared of making mistakes and doing anything wrong because when it happens to others i look up to, its always treated as something they'll never be able to change or improve. makes me feel like imma just be a horrible person forever because i made mistakes in the past.
This is a really complicated question that multiple answers can validly fit.
I don't think, personally, that anyone is irredeemable. I think everyone is on a journey of forgiveness and some of us may need more grace than others.
This is tw// abuse even more than the current topic, but my mom was incredibly abusive. We lived in a very rural area and she had a lot of undiagnosed problems and trauma of her own that created a pressure pot of issues. After I was born, she suffered through full on post-partum psychosis that nearly ended about as well as that sentence implies it could have. She was incredibly violent, controlling, and cruel for years. My sister went no-contact with her the second she turned 18. A significant event occurred that eventually spurned her into seeking real treatment that lasted for years. It's still ongoing.
My sister is also still no contact and I support her decision 100%. Those are her wounds and what she needed to do to get peace should be respected. I decided I wanted a relationship with the person who came out of all that work and, even then, it's been hard. I don't know if she's redeemed herself, and my god do we still have bumps in the road, but I support her for trying.
With Wilbur, how he responds to this is going to really impact a lot of things. I mean, I know no matter how he responds I won't be going on whatever journey of redemption and healing he has to go through. I'm tired and I feel hurt enough. I would think, if he wanted to show he was sincere, admitting what happened would be a great sense of closure for a lot of people who put time and energy and faith into this guy for years.
Not every person that causes harm is inherently evil, but there has to be some kind of knowledge that you're aware of the harm you've caused. No one is stuck as anything forever, life is constantly moving, and most people aren't saying his life is just over. You can work on yourself. You can change. And I'm saying that specifically to you, anonymous.
(Saying this, actually, there ARE people who would argue once you've done x you're beyond redemption based entirely on their life experiences as a victim, personal histories and many other factors. Kinda like my sister, that's their choice. And you have to accept that sometimes you fuck up so badly that you will permanently lose some people from your life. But your life isn't over.)
But I do think, regardless of what he says or does about this, his time of controlling a large platform is at an end. He can still do a lot of things in his life after he works on himself -- editing, song producing, directing, writing or whatever -- but being in charge of a large impressionable audience that could enable more destructive behaviors is just not it.
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I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. I AM SICK AND BLOODY TIRED OF THESE MFS, HALF OF WHO DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT CURSED CHILD, BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT AN ANGSTY TEEN DARING TO BE AN ANGSTY TEEN, I WILL FIGHT THE LOT OF YOU
(this is gonna be a bit long and probably incoherent so sit down and fucking listen to me 🔫 stick with me because I'm not just complaining about albus haters)
eVERYBODY wants cOoMmpllEeXx relatable HUMAN characters - and then SHIT themselves when the flaws a CHILD has isn't just 🥺 uwu im socially awkward and traumatised 🥺. that's why scorpius doesn't get this fuckass treatment, because his terrible human flaw is that he's a bit shit at conversation and gets sad about his dead mum (generalised understatement, but this post isnt about him. dont come for me i love him 🫶🏻)
god forbid albus, who feels unloved and unwanted (with valid evidence for a teenager), albus who feels completely out of place and outcast from his entire famously-close-knit family, ablus who is well known by the world by default via Harry and hates the attention and high expectations, albus who then gets targeted and bullied by his peers because he's not as perfect and brilliant as his father, albus who is then isolated from his one friend because Harry is making irrational ptsd fueled decisions, albus who tells Harry completely sincerely that he knows he's unlikeable but he'll try and change himself and be more like his siblings because he genuinely believes that's what Harry and everyone else whos had the misfortune of meeting him wants, albus who spends the entire play trying to prove himself and fix things via idiotic childish decisions BECAUSE HES A WHOLE UNSTABLE CHILD
god forbid that CHILD doesn't react like a patient, supported, well adjusted, level headed adult. god forbid he reacts outwardly. god forbid he reacts at all, my bad. clearly he should just sniffle a bit as if he doesn't feel suffocated and helpless by everything in his life, because obviously hes just a spoiled brat who doesn't know what real suffering is. god forbid he complains or feels anything negatively, or doesn't quite grasp that other people are struggling too because he is too busy trying so hard to deal with himself and his declining mental health the best he can with basically no support or understanding. god forbid he isn't completely perfect.
you all sound like some fucking boomer telling teenagers they don't know what real struggling is, they aren't mentally ill, they dont have any problems because they have a roof over their head, they should all go to war kids are too soft these days 😫😖😱 fUCKING‼️SHUT UP‼️
he does things wrong but he knows he does and he does everything he can to fix it! and he is fourteen!!! do none of you remember what being fourteen is like 😭😭 I swear half of you have got to be basically fourteen yourselves cmon man
cause I'm seeing this fucking pattern a lot recently. not just for albus, not just in this fandom, everywhere. ‼️ no one can fucking handle flawed characters anymore ‼️ the only thing any character is allowed to have wrong with them is trauma apparently, otherwise they have to be perfect, and I'm getting sick of it. characters and stories are meant to reflect real life, they're meant to help shape our world view, why are you expecting everyone to be fucking perfect??? what happened to nuance? what happened to understanding character development? you are all acting like characters and people are so black and white. either they're perfect or they're insufferable and evil. I won't lie, the most common victims i've noticed of this are women. but the flawed women are typically demonised, whereas the men are typically turned into uwu baby boys who actually aren't capable of doing anything wrong and then fanon goes nuts making them into ittle wittle victims. and I'm so fucking sick of all of it, I hate this. (obviously this is not a strict rule. Albus Potter, and also Albus Dumbledore now I mention it, are demonised beyond belief)
BRING BACK FLAWS AND BRING BACK NOT COMPLETELY WRITING OFF A CHARACTER BECAUSE THEY DARE TO BE HUMAN
I AM FED UP, ALBUS POTTER GET BEHIND ME
#he did many things wrong BUT I PROMISE YOU HE IS MORE AWARE THAN YOU ARE#HE HATES HIMSELF MORE THAN YOU EVER COULD#this post has been building a lot because i just kEEP SEEING ALBUS HATERS AND ITS DRIVING ME INSANE#i am albus potters defence lawyer actually#also eloise bridgertons i am seeing far too many people jumping on that hate train#i know shes going through her im not like other girls i hate pink phase but OF COURSE SHE IS#SHE LIVES IN THE 1800S WOMEN ARENT ALLOWED TO DO SHIT SHE FEELS TRAPPED IN A BOX AND ALL SHE SEES IS OTHER PEOPLE PLAYING THEIR PARTS#i could talk about her a lot more but this isnt the time or place 😔✋🏻 eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you#also sansa stark i havent even watched game of thrones but i would fight to the death to defend her#her only crime was being a naive child and yet people hate her mercilessly#these are the people coming to me off the top of my head but there are countless fucking others#we are witnessing the death of media literacy and the death of nuance and its killing me i cannot fucking do this#i sincerely hope anyone complaining about al dont ever have teenage children because they will be shit at supporting or understanding them#hpcc#harry potter#albus potter#scorpius malfoy#years spent on tumblr and i still dont know how to tag#albus severus potter#harry potter and the cursed child#scorbus#is it cheeky if i tag bridgerton or game of thrones?#it feels cheeky 😔#the marauders#tagging that too because that fandom are fucking perpetrators of this#(said as someone in it dont come for me)
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kosmical · 3 months ago
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alr i'll bite what's isat
Omg thanks for opening pandoras box! You will regret this
In stars and time is the recent food source of my brain eating amoeba and it Will Not Leave. before i get into why im rabid about it though ill give a brief synopsis . putting a read more here because i suspect this post will get LONG.
its a game about a classic rpg party on the last two days of their quest to save the country from The King who is freezing everything, including people, in time. the main character, Siffrin, is the party's rogue who, upon going into the House of Change (the game's dungeon so to speak) and promptly dying, finds out that they're trapped in a time loop. they're the only one who remembers repeating the last two days- aside from a star named loop who helps him try and figure out whats going on, why, and how to break out.
Now personally ive never been invested in a time loop story?? Im not sure if thats because i havent consumed much media thats implemented it before as its main premise or if i just havent been interested but i think in stars and time meshes the two different genres a time loop story can fall into really well (the mystery and the emotional conflict).
The mystery is what drives you through the game (and there are other questions unrelated to the timeloop about siffrin's origin and the world itself that i think handle a variety of themes like loss of culture and personal transformation really well but thats a different tangent) but the emotional parts are what really got me. You have to watch almost in the backseat as Siffrin is like. Slowly depersonalized from the people they care about. All while refusing to tell them anything about their misery because they don't want to burden them or drag them into his suffering. Even happy moments that Siffrin doesnt mind repeating become tainted because it becomes a matter of acting so that the "scene" doesnt stray from its path and his party doesnt become suspicious.
and yet they still DO, both in regards to Siffrin's World Alteringly Terrible Case of the Mondays and the actual time loop. they notice how tired and fake he seems. one of my absolute favorite scenes is one where you interact with a closet and it provokes a conversation about where Siffrin got their cloak from and how long they've had it, because its really one of a kind. it has temperature regulatory magic imbued in the stitches and is made to grow with him. And siffrin just cant fucking remember. not only because hes been looping so long that its created a haze over his mind but because he has no true "identity." and as he's scrambling to fill in an answer for this hole in his head, a gust of wind hits his face because one of their friends, isabeau, flapped his cloak while inspecting it to ground him. and he disguises it by commenting on the thickness of the cloak.
Getting this scene by accident on my playthrough made me feel so many feelings dude like . Siffrin isn't the only one trying to hide things. Their friends care about him so much and they try to disguise how concerned thwy are and its just. Im . Im Normal.
its not just about that though . Like if you start finding shit a little too fast they'll start catching on to whats happening. a little sound effect will play whenever you know something you shouldn't know and the others notice and whenever it happened i was like. Twisting in my seat waiting for them to call me out.
it all builds up into this really fucking painful emotional climax that i will not talk about because i don't want to spoil more than i already have but omg. I was writhing. It was. Hhhggnngh.hfg. Glass shards in ym mouth yummy
On the topic of shit i cant talk about: My favorite character is this fucking thing
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I have held off from talking about loop's role in the story because i cant describe to you why they make me so ill. Not because i dont know Why but because it is something you should experience yourself. They're really charming and funny and their dialogue is fantastic. Of course that's part of the reason i lauve them but theres also the underlying secondary mystery of why they're here/who and or what they are/etc. And when u know. Its. I Cant Tell You. BUT ITS REALLY GOOD. ITS REALLY REALLY GOOD. Just know that if you get to the end and are still confused about them. That theres more than the main ending . AND IT IS PROBABLY WHY I AM SO INSANE ABOUT THIS GAME HONESTLY. I LOVE YOU FOREVER LOOP . im ok
In short: In stars and time is a game that is good and you should play it :) Im pretty sure its on sale right now on steam so yeah go get that.
if you made it through this fucking dissertation length post on isat CONGRATULATIONS ! heres some miscellaneous doodles ive done of it in the past month since ive played it love love
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starlightsuffered · 4 months ago
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Addiction
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Info - alcoholic reader, comfort, angst, comparing yourself to others, dark thoughts
“Im fucking disgusting,” I whispered to myself. I was rocking back and forth. Guilt overwhelmed me completely. I was in tears. I didn’t even want Timothée to see me. He was so pure and so good, and he deserved better than my trash self.
“Baby?” I heard his voice and I curled into a tighter ball.
“Baby; oh honey, what’s wrong?”
“Go away, I’m fucking poisonous,” I snarled. I heard him jerk back like I’d slapped him. I continued to cry.
“Please let me comfort you,” he whispered
“No, I don’t deserve it. I’m like a fucking serial killer. I get so angry and so sad-“
“I have a rage inside me I don’t think I’ll ever quell and a river of sadness,” Timothée corrected me. “I’m not a serial killer am I?”
“Of course you aren’t,” I wept.
“See-“
“But I’m not like you!” I screamed. I finally turned to him. I saw the man I loved. The pain in his eyes shone out like beams. He clearly cared for me so much.
“I am damaged, I am weak and stupid. I have so much jealousy and hate sometimes. I am not good. I am like a serial killer,” I burst out.
“You drank again didn’t you?” Timmy asked softly.
“Of course I did! I can’t do anything fucking right,” I exclaimed.
He came to me and though I fought back a little, he put his arms around me. He was always here for me. Always. He buried his face in my neck and took a deep breath. I knew he was exasperated.
“You are not bad, you are suffering from an illness. I know you feel bad for drinking again but recovery is not linear. It isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. I’m with you, I am your eternal supporter.”
“Timothée,” I said in a broken voice.
“You are strong. I am not better than you just because I don’t have an addiction. Everyone experiences those emotions you’re talking about. You are NOT bad, you are NOT like a serial killer. You are good and do so much for so many,” he said all this softly.
Shouted words might have shot through my brain and out just as fast. These slow, gentle phrases hung around in my atmosphere. I reeled them in ever so slowly.
“Thank you,” I gasped. I was still crying.
“What makes you want to drink?”
“I don’t know. I feel like a better person. I’m more accepting, my anxiety is gone, I get the urge to write long loving things to people. I don’t like myself, so I think it makes me better.”
“I love you so much more sober. You may be tired and other things, but you just glow with strength. It makes me well up with tears.”
“Thank you, thank you,” I breathed, turning so I could cry into his shirt. He held me as long as I needed.
@pmak2002 @softhecreator @plutoispurplw @sp1deyyf4ngz @seungcheol17daddy @jesschalamet @vvsdreaming
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overb · 5 months ago
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SNIPPET: (how we feelin abt this?? i need opinions bcs im gen so unsure how to start this fic)
SUMMER SUFFERERS
roach: good morning fuckers (3:20AM)
roach: we are en route (3:20AM)
wall: so are we (3:25AM)
wall: and they aren't even awake yet (3:26AM)
doll: i am awake thank u very much (3:29AM)
doll: everyone else is asleep our alarms arent set till like 4:45 but i havent slept yet so!!!! (3:30AM)
===
The stairs dug into Tim’s back as he stretched across them, head flopped awkwardly to the side as he watched Alfred open the door. All of his siblings were sprawled across the main staircase, half asleep and very upset. It was 4:50AM, the first day of the Summer Meetup, and Bruce expected everyone to be downstairs to greet their arriving guests. It was a stupid idea, in Tim’s opinion, as everyone arrived as tired as each other.
Last summer Hal had shown up in shorts and one shoe, making it two steps into the manor before slumping against the wall and going straight to sleep. Any expectations left after the first five years of Summer Meetup’s went straight out the window.
The doorbell rang and Tim cracked open an eye to watch the first people stumble in. Alfred pulled open the door quickly, the only one in the Manor actually functioning, letting three bodies in.
They were people Tim didn’t recognise — fully awake people. People dressed in actual clothes; shorts and shirts and shoes and socks. What the fuck. Bruce hauled himself off of the wall and stuck a hand out, muttering something too quiet for anyone to hear. The man smiled at Bruce. He looked ready to talk, awake enough to talk, but put off by the glares all the kids were giving him.
Alfred ushered them further into the room, gesturing to a cleared corner for them to put their bags. They followed his instructions to the T, loitering awkwardly next to their suitcases. One of them — the youngest boy — spotted (the face down) Damian and waved happily. The other boy — the one who looked Tim’s age — laughed when Damian didn’t respond.
Stephanie was next in, unlocking the door with her key before anyone else could act. She managed a smile at Alfred before stumbling up the stairs, kicking Dick in the ribs and throwing herself down next to Cass.
The doorbell rang as soon as Steph closed her eyes. This time Barry, Wally and Bart rolled in. They were all half asleep, Bart bumping into the boy their age as he abandoned his bag. Tim managed a laugh at that, catching Bart’s attention. Wally was already cuddled up to Dick and Barry was slumped at Bruce’s feet, head resting against the man's legs by the time Bart reached Tim. He threw himself on top of him and started snoring, a spitting image of Barry’s own sounds.
Five minutes later Hal dragged himself into the Manor, joining Barry on the floor and passing straight out. Tim took it as a sign to also, finally, sleep, and let his eyes drift shut as they waited for the last group to arrive.
bcs like… i have so many ideas running thru my head for this i have no idea how to start ir
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