#im so fucking powerless to do anything

[weirdloverwilde]

might have one of my depressive episodes again

[sydmarch]

anyway this is what i was actually trying to find. fucking thinking about this.

[beautifel]

i. hate that i cant ignore any longer how fucked up i am

[cherrywperson]

Can't do anything about it.

[theamazingannie]

Not my mom asking me what my brother’s email and password is and me knowing it lmao. Why does no one around here even acknowledge that I’m more of a parent to my brother than they are

[skyllion-uwu]

I have discovered many gamer themed euphisms for sex with this one song

[doxiedreg]

Its once again 11 pm and I once again have not eaten dinner yet because being depressed makes me dysfunctional especially when it comes to food

I'm going to be so glad to be with my mom on Saturday, I always eat well at my mom's

But when I'm alone and going through a depressive episode my diet is shit, i eat very little and very delayed and making a proper meal feels like too much work so i dont have a well rounded diet like I usually do and dear god why must my depression be like this

Why must it deprive me of food

Food is so important

It's not that I hate food, it's not that I'm afraid to get fat or anything (and getting fat wouldn't be bad in any way either) but I just do not care. I do not feel like eating anything and everything feels as too much work to prepare. I do not crave anything and thus do not know what to eat and resolve it by not eating at all

It sucks so hard guys, my stomach freaking hurts and is begging me to eat food but I don't want to get up and even if I did get up I wouldn't know what the fuck I want to eat

My depression has been going on for like almost a month at this point I'm so fucking sick of it, let me fucking go back to being a somewhat functional human who's able to enjoy things instead of being apathy incarnate who desires to lie in bed all day

[thatdemiboymess]

Even just half-heartedly looking for work as someone who is legally blind, autistic, with no highschool diploma, GED, or degrees and who can't leave the house is a very specific kind of let-down and disappointment that just really makes a person depressed.

[rambiing]

I AM SO FUCKING TIRED

AUTISTIC IS NOT AN INSULT

STOP CALLING YOUR FRIENDS AUTISTIC WHEN YOU MEAN STUPID

STOP CALLING YOUR FRIENDS THE R SLUR. IT'S A SLUR.

IM SO FUCKING TIRED OF AUTISTIC PEOPLE NOT GETTING THE RESPECT WE DESERVE

EVEN IN DAILY CONVERSATIONS

[hydrasaura]

.

[warmbathroomfloorismysafespace]

In the morning is my first day on a real job after uni and of course I'm staying up til 2 am digging into the burden that I am

[skinnymeanfaggot]

my trauma makes me act in the most inconvenient and terrible ways and some things arent excuses but also when everytime you say no to something you just get pushed and pushed and pushed and guilt tripped and coerced and forced you learn to be like whats the fucking point yeah you can do whatever you want with me. because god knows my feelings dont make a difference. like i only fucking exist to please people. but then i fuck even that up i guess

[pimento-playing-hopscotch]

OHHHHHH.

One moment while I find that gif of Tom Hanks -

Found it!

OVERHATED CHARACTERS POLL: Owen Strand (9-1-1: Lone Star)

Feel free to explain your position in the comments or tags, but any harassment, over-the-top fighting, or personal attacks will result in you being blocked. Do not attack real people, be they fans or creators, over fictional characters.

[luveline]

I love bombshell!reader omg they’re so cutie. Im in an angst mood so imagine reader finally being hit emotionally hard on a case and asking spencer to stay with her in the hotel?? The rest of the team tries so hard to help but only Spencer can help her omg 🥹

thank you for your request ♡ fem!reader

Morgan has an arm around you. It's the first thing Spencer notices, and he thinks, Thank fuck. Thank fuck someone's holding you together. And then he thinks, Maybe I should be that someone. 

He's never seen you shaking that hard. Your usual easy air, not unlike Penelope's, has shrunk to nought. There's no flirty smile sent his way as he approaches, no dramatic throw of Moran's arm. I'd never cheat on my baby, you'd say, though you and Spencer aren't really dating. 

"You okay?" he asks. 

Spencer feels powerless in the face of your despair. You're obviously not fine. Kids always hit you the worst, and so many? Your reaction is warranted if uncharacteristic. 

You don't answer him. Morgan squeezes your arm and stands with a kiss to the top of your head. "I'll leave you in the best hands," he says in way of farewell. 

Spencer sits in the space Morgan vacates, hand behind your shoulder, his fingers curling between your side and your upper arm. You've had blood wiped out of your eyes haphazard, crusting of crimson on your lashes like a morbid mascara. He feels like crying for you. 

"Hey," he says, giving your back a slow, heavy handed rub, "Sorry I wasn't here." 

"That's okay." Your voice is all shudders like a trapped moth. "I'm okay." 

He steers your face to his with a cautious hand to look at you properly. With want of a better method, he takes your untouched water bottle and holds it to his sleeve, pulling it over his fingers while the fabric is still saturated to wipe away the missed blood.

You follow his touch, eyes closing with a quick, pained sigh. Like he's pricked you with a knifepoint.

"I know you think you have to be perfect," Spencer says, sleeve turning a dirty orange, "but this is enough to affect anybody." 

"I am perfect," you say quietly. It falls flat. 

Spencer cups both sides of your face. Your eyes flutter open at the feeling. "You're perfect. And a perfect person would handle this badly." 

His hands look rigid compared to the soft slopes of your cheeks, but they're gentle. 

Tears like silver line your eyes. You wear grief like everything else until suddenly you don't, a crack, a sniffle and you're turning your face into one of his hands desperately. Spencer knows what you need before you're moving, pulling you into his chest with a hand braced behind your neck. 

"It's okay," he says, hoping that if he says it with enough conviction it'll be true. "It's not your fault. There was nothing else we could do."

You shake your head from side to side against his shoulder. "I should've been quicker. I knew what was going to happen, I knew. And I couldn't do anything about it, I couldn't–" Your sob is pulled from you on a hook, hard and sudden enough to end in a wheeze.

Spencer doesn't know what else to do but hug you and hope it calms you down. He's not used to being the most composed of the two of you, a disconnect between the salacious woman who hounds him relentlessly and the one who's falling apart in the circle of his arms. 

You shake. Spencer rubs your back, shielding you from the cold weather until Hotch shouts for the BAU to fall in and get ready to leave. 

"Will you stay with me?" you ask, pulling away from his chest reluctantly. "I don't want to be alone. The hotel's too…" 

Spencer frowns, eyes closed, his face crushed to the side of your head. "Of course I will." 

He knows what you were going to say. It's too quiet after all of tonight's noise. And alone, blaming yourself, he knows you'll scare yourself. Tear yourself to pieces. So Spencer sticks to you like glue from the SUV to the hotel to the jet the next morning. He'd do anything you asked him to do no matter how hard. 

When you're ready, you'll fall back into your flirtatious routines. For now, Spencer takes your twitching hands under the table and holds them.

[starboye]

Kinktober Day 26

starring: logan howlett x ftm!male reader

request: logan howlett making ftm reader wear a bunny lingire after his workout coming back all musky and sweaty all pent up and fucks male reader while male reader licks up logans sweat etc. Making logans smell kink and breed kink go off and fully breeds male reader / size difference with Wolverine and an FTM reader. Logan is much bigger and stronger than reader and can pick him up, pin him down, and throw him around with ease and both of them go bonkers for it. Logan loves the control and power he has to play with reader as he pleases and reader loves feeling overpowered and in Logan's complete control

warnings: smut, cursing, bunny outfit, sweat and musk kink, rough sex, ass grabbing, size kink, use a predator and prey, hickeys, marking i guess, male pregnancy, spit as lube, position switching, mating press, cowgirl, missionary, overstimualtion, underwear as a gag, fucked silly, unprotected sex, creampie

after a strenuous work out and training session logan was happy to be back to his room and seeing you layed in bed, but what was more surprising was seeing you dressed in a bunny outfit waiting for him "and what's all this" he asks dropping his bags on the floor and walking closer to you, grabbing you closer by your hips and kissing your, his hands finding their way to hold your ass in his hands.

you smelled him, his body riddled with the stench of sweat all over versus your sweet smelling perfume that you put on before he came in the room "you wearing a new cologne or something" he asks as the scent fills his nose and his fingers dipped past the lining of the white lingerie underwear you had on.

"it's vanilla logan" you chuckle moving to unbuckle his pants, pulling his belt out of the loops and throwing it somewhere on the floor "well i hate it, i want you to smell like me" he growls picking you up and putting you on the bed, taking off his clothes and getting over you, he tries to rip off the panties but you stop him.

"hell no, these things cost 90 dollars and im getting my moneys worth so take them off nicely" you sternly say making logan roll his eyes before slowly peeling them off and leaving the bunny ears on because they look cute, with how you looked it made him feel bigger, he knew he physically was bigger but something about you in that sexy outfit.

it made him feel like the predator and you were the cute prey he was going to fucking devour, his arms were like triple the size of yous which enthralled him, the thought he could do whatever he wanted with you and you were powerless to do anything about it.

he spits some saliva on his cock and rubs it in before leaning down next to you, kissing your neck as he moves into you, splitting your soaking pussy open as he just sniffed and kissed you, your hands finding his back instantly, holding him tightly to which he smirks "what, scared y' gonna fall" he stupidly remarked drawing a scoff from you.

as much as he wanted to go easy on you, the moans and whimpers coming out of your mouth was making it harder and harder till he couldn't take it and started plowing your cunt harshly, plaps filling the room as he bruised your insides with his cock and your ass with his hips.

your sweet scent was cute to him but he wanted to own you, so much so that he started leaving hickeys on ever inch of your skin and somehow covering you in his sweat, removing what once was a cute guy to now a moaning slut under logan taking every inch of his huge cock, his nose and mouth moving all over your neck till you were covered with his marks and smell.

"y'think you can get pregnant f'me" he asks, he knew you couldn't get pregnant but with the way you were sucking him every time he tried to pull out he would be damned if he didn't try at least, he suddenly picked you up and put you on top of him, your legs straddled to both his sides as he moved you up and down on him.

you were a mess at this point you ruined cunt sopping with wetness, making logan even hornier was that he could see the outline of his cock in your tummy, feeling over it with his calloused hand as a smirk creeps across his face once more, if he wanted to get you pregnant he has to try the best possible position.

so he turns you over into a mating press, a choked out moan escaping your mouth "logan- wait i cant ngh" you tried to stop him but he just shoved his sweat covered underwear into your mouth and fucked down into you, ruining every last bit of self respect you had as you started creaming all over his shaft, it building up right on his pubes, which he really loved.

watching your legs shake in overstuimulation as he continued rough fucking the pussy he loves so much, he's one the verge of cumming at this point and seeing you a moaning mess under him just makes his heart thud against his chest, he wants to own you inside and out and what better way to achieve that than filling your pretty little pussy to the brim with his warm cum that you want so much.

with one more hard thrust he unloads in you, his heavy grunts over shadowing your whimpers and whines, your hole fluttering around his cock milking more and more out of him until he was completely drained of his cum and plopping down next you, you couldn't even make out what was going on by now, your mind to fuzzy and broken to even think but don''t worry in about 9 months you'll be filled with joy to be having his kids.

taglist:@mailmango @spermeboy @ghostking4m @gayaristocrat @addictedtomalepits @staarb0y @crispysoup318 @its-ares @gargoylesworld09 @kadenvatsune @fuckshft @wompwomp-1mh3re

[autumnbrambleagain]

everyone jokes about how they'd be different if they were a vampire wizard immortal they wouldn't lose track of mortal life they'd be So Normal About It but in playing a single morrowind save for like a year now with a ton of mods im experiencing the strange growth of my characterization in it from powerless outsider with no home to wizard to becoming increasingly strange to maintain power and like

okay see i can just. you can't teleport infinitely but my alteration and vampire Jumps are so good i can just literally launch off and land anywhere in the world. space no longer matters to me. a 10 minute walk is now a 10 second jump.

vampirism means i'm immune to normal weapons and my stats are so dang high i can just stand there and even with MDMD and the 4nm PVP mod most things can't really hit me or hurt me and i have 100 ways to kill anything at will. i have so many limiting mods on to keep me from going Broken but i still have destruction 130 strength 140 stealth 150 and like it took me like a real life year of playing on and off to get that far so it feels Earned and there was a real sense of progression (excluding the vampire boost jump) but it's made me Strange power makes you Weird

and having such absolutely drunken insane power over mortal life really fucks with me doing the main quest for the first time in a decade where like

the erabenimsum are like "you'll... have to kill the warlike leaders of our tribe. we warn you they are very powerful" and i'm just like. what. you guys were my neighbors for a year at this point i could have just killed a bunch of you and changed your society in 30 seconds and you'd have let me yeah ok. hold on. brb. and i just kind of pop in and explode everyone and come back like yeah that was easy no worries.

and like i started this game deeply immersed, like taking everything slow eating different foods every day to satisfy my ashfall meters doing paintings of places i liked hanging out fishing and now i'm just this vampire Force of Will teleporting and flying and destroying things with a black-eyed glance and i'm playing with doors of oblivion and finding there is such a Bigger World out there like

i think the actual natural progression of this character is complete disassociation with the world and graduation from like ALL of this this fucker is piercing the Aurbis and just Leaving which you know is like

a distressingly resonant thematic with my own experiences and that i am playing this character as my 1:1 self insert like haha yeahthat. that. that hits a lot closer to home than i wanted it to. as above so below no matter how many onion layers huh.