#even just being a cashier at pet smart requires a fucking highschool diploma!!! and i cant even do that sort of work anymore!!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thatdemiboymess · 9 months ago

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Even just half-heartedly looking for work as someone who is legally blind, autistic, with no highschool diploma, GED, or degrees and who can't leave the house is a very specific kind of let-down and disappointment that just really makes a person depressed.

#irl #vent #suicidal ideation #i am a money sink and a financial burden and trying to look for ways to fix that turns up nothing!!!#society abandons those who cannot work!!! and i sure do seem to be unemployable!!!#like #i would need a work from home job that doesnt require a highschool diploma ged or a degree that i can do as someone who is legally blind #at the LEAST #even just being a cashier at pet smart requires a fucking highschool diploma!!! and i cant even do that sort of work anymore!!!#i dont have any fancy little talents or areas of expertise either!!! i cant code i suck at source work i cant do graphic design!!!#what am i supposed to do #can someone just like put me down like a sick animal or smth at this point #because i feel like all i amount to at this point is a burdensome and childish good for nothing waste of space #and an additional source of stress and disappointment for everyone who has ever cared about me or had hopes for my future #sincerely feel like everyone who knows me would be better off if i were dead #no one would have to take care of me then - theyd be free of any burden i put on them #hell considering how few people i talk to and how little o do talk to ones i DO talk to they probably wouldnt even notice i were gone #and once they did they probably wouldnt be upset for long at all if they would be upset to begin with #my partner would be free to find a smaller more affordable place to live or could even get a car and live in it as he thought of doing #before if i werent around being a little needy whiny bitch #seriously whats even the fucking point #im so tired of just...fucking everything.#i dont talk about it much but i really do just feel like shit all the fucking time man #and i feel so fucking powerless and like i have no control of my life too #should probably be in therapy still but i just know theyd force me into the psych ward again #not that talk therapy would do shit for me anyways tho #i dunno #im tired and sad and hopeless and i just wanna go to sleep and not wake up again #not that it matters or anything though lololol

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