#im not sure if you ever check here
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
idk
#im not sure if you ever check here#I’m not sure if I’ll post this and you’ll see it within a week or within two years or maybe never#but I’m okay now#mostly#it’s halfway through January rn and I have so much to say to you but also so little#I hope youre happy but I hope you’re happy far away from me#that being said#I love you and I always will#it doesn’t mean anything though#not if you don’t want it to#I’ll probably post again because at 25 I haven’t let go of anything in my life ever#but at the time time this specific post feels almost like a goodbye from me#I open tumblr every day hoping ?? not sure if that’s the right word#that I’ll have an anonymous message from you#it’s so silly#idk if that will ever go away (checking every time I open this app)#but I’m at peace with never receiving one#I hope that makes sense#anyway#I’m seeing someone#it could last a month a year or forever#I’m not sure yet#but I was okay before she came into my life#so it’s not like I’m only okay because I have her#aaaaaanyway#I love you and I’m sorry and goodbye#(for 7 years or for forever? time will tell)#25
1 note
·
View note
Note
WAIT WAIT WAIT CHERIK MPREG IS CANON
i cannot stress enough how canon cherik mpreg is, yes my friend
#snap chats#i could elaborate in the main body but i cant distract from the epic statement 'cherik mpreg is canon'#ill elaborate down here tho LOL. not extensively Just Enough to provide context#anyways 90's run where erik's on his bullshit as per usual and at some point rips the adamantium out of logan's body#which causes charles to . how do you even describe what happens Like He Invades Erik's Mind To Get Him To Cut That Shit#cause this was just The Final Straw at that point#but the problem is while charles is in erik's mind. And I Quote. Paraphrase Whatever Its Been A Minute#'something implants itself within charles' and onslaught just kinda festers in the back of charles' mind for a while#and onslaught is basically just. every evil/dark/wrong thought charles has ever had + erik's rage and 'lust for power'#my exact memory of events gets hazy here but im p sure charles abandons his body for a bit which enables onslaught to take over#aaaand yeah we have that thing running around now. kinda. we made a pocket dimension to escape it.#onslaught returns in krakoa after being implanted in a mutant named lost#and onslaught would feed off the lost time in-between resurrections#like say you die monday and get brought back wednesday- all of tuesday goes to feeding onslaught#he doesnt actually Show Up show up for most of it hes more of a looming presence which i fw#and then he tries to get everyone to kill each other at the gala while making charles delete back-up data#onslaught does physically appear by the end of onslaught revelation once charles snaps out of the mind control at the gala#and erik's checking on him and Im Pretty Sure just by virtue of them being next to eachother onslaught manifests#cute shit really !!!!! but yeah thats a very VERY quick (and prob a lil wrong) rundown of onslaught's premise
57 notes
·
View notes
Text
& by the way i literally CONSTANTLY think about how loop uses the partys titles to create distance to remind themself that those arent 'their versions' of them. that theyre not loops party anymore. and yet and yet and yet
#talk tag#i think about 'and because of you bonnie was-' DAILYYYYYY#god. god. they care s mcuhghfjkbjkdklj#i think that may be the only time until twohats that they ever use any of the partys names. except! for reminding sif if u get that dialogu#which. im also normal about. clearly obviously absolutely#they create that distance as much as they can and yet. for siffrin.#godddddd i need to be sedated#isat spoilers#okay oh my god i went back to check to make sure i was right and turns out i forgor a couple of times both of which make me even more ill#one is technically under the umbrella of twohats bc its at the very end when loop says theyll need to accept everyones thanks. and they say#-everyones names. and the other is at the very very beginning in the initial battle tutorial they say everyones names + stats#(which btw PROVES MY POINT abt so much of loops help going under the radar bc in any other game itd just be a regular tutorial with no-#-in universe correlation or effect)#but they start with 'heres some basic stats about you and your party members to remember' and i. the. like realistically the explanation-#-for loop using their names instead of titles. is bc adrienne thought using their titles would make it too obvious someone else was talking#since u havent met loop yet at that point and dont know its not a regular tutorial thats only directed at the player and not the character#But Also: heres some things you should remember about your party members [lists their names]#im normal. im fine and normal. prommy#... okay it turns out they also say isabeaus name when giving the paper mache hands tutorial. no idea what to make of that one aklfjdlksjf#and after the change god event when u bring it up they say 'mirabelles statue'#And Thats It. fascinating. what is the logic there#isatposting
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
your favourite finn's favourite (honourary) finn
winnipeg jets @ florida panthers | 11.16.24 (x)(x)(x)
#evan rodrigues#aleksander barkov#florida panthers#2425#the finland trip has done wonders for them#if not because evan im insane about finland and will make my mark on this country whether it wants me to or not rodrigues#got cushier with sasha#not to say he hasnt already because the sasha lovechip did get implanted in his brain the second he got here#all the barky stuff he said in 2324#but also hes just gotten more uh how you say... uh blatant with it (read: NOT LIKE HE WASNT ALREADY)#roddy fits so well under sashas arm :((#the little tap he makes sure to give him :(((#crying about how smiley he gets with sasha and then remembers everyone else coming in for the celly and has to lock in#made the goofiest damn goal ever which is so in character for roddy#and got sasha to smile in the process#his court jester duties have been fufilled!!#sasha hugs him like hes his girlfriend. good for roddy.#seriously someone check in on roddy is he going into cardiac arrest after his dearly beloved finnish captain smiled and hugged him
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
Beauty of the Mundane
Set in the Biting the Hand that Feeds AU
just a lil drabble I thought about while drawing this attack for @xitsensunmoon !!!
in which you literally do nothing, and Moon has a bit of a crisis
It was a normal day, all things considered. You took a late night shift today, and besides the normal trials and tribulations of being a doctor in this city, there wasn't anything really to complain about. No Karens, no lifethreatening emergencies, and you even got a thank you card from a boy you helped through your donations And even though your eyebags were noticable and your body tenser than a taut bowstring, you took your wins when you could. You open your door and even cook dinner that night (yay!) while chatting up a storm with your vampiric roommates who are secretly as overjoyed as you that you had a good day. After a shower and a clean change of clothes, you all but flop into Moon's arms with a one round trip to dreamland. The routine started as a teasing remark one cold night, Moon recalls, the heater was busted and the poor human was shivering like a leaf. So, as a suggestion ( with no ulterior motives of course), he offered his lap as a solution. He does have a wonderfully warm fluffy coat, you know. He was met by flimsy excuses paired with embarrassed expressions the first few times, but he knew you couldn't resist him in the end. Soon, it became a part of everyday life with your lunar-themed friend: he gets your blood, gets to be by your side while you rest, and teases you all the times in between. Rinse and repeat for basically the foreseeable future. Moon looks down at your resting features now as his reminscing is interrupted by gentle snores. You looked so peaceful, the day's stress washed away entirely as you lay in the glow of moonlight. A certain feeling begins to creep up in the vampire's mind as he sits with you, he can't quite put a name to it. It was nice though. Being depended on, he thinks. Your relationship with the brothers were a little (a lot) parasitic in nature. It was nice to be able to give something back that wasn't the excuse of "entertainment" or "better food". The feeling sort of stews for a few minutes in Moon's mind.... ...Until, like a panther after stalking its prey, the feeling is suddenly realized and had you not been currently in Moon's lap, he would have jolted with a concerning violence. His usual smug smirk now reduced to a stunned expression and eyelights completely dark. He likes this. This meaning the quiet moments with you. Not just the playfulness and drinking of your blood -- both great things do not get him wrong -- but the everyday moments. The domesticity. And as he spirals, he realizes something else. Nothing about the individual parts of your with him relationship really have anything in common. Not the blood, not the quick witted conversations, and most certainly not these late nights. Nothing....except you. Maybe, just maybe...that means he likes you more than he thought. As he looks down at you again, it feels more special this time. As if time has stopped just for Moon to drink in all of your features, to try and figure you out as you slumber. And that's the kicker, he thinks. You did nothing but sleep and yet you managed to get a rise out of him. He quietly chuckles. You really are something. He thinks back to the first time you met. And then all the memories that happened in between then and now, good and bad. He looks back down at you. Yeah, you really are something.
#GUYS AM I DOING THIS RIGHT???? I'VE ONLY EVER USED TUMBLR FOR LURKING I'M SURE YOU CAN TELL#bhtf moon drop#bhtf yn#bhtf au fanwriting#bhtf au fanart#biting the hand that feeds au#vampire au#bhtf au#my art#vampire moondrop#hey if somehow you see this and haven't already checked out this au go do it I need more fan content :3333#i really hope i captured his personality im out here doin my best
324 notes
·
View notes
Text
MIKE BLOCKED ME ON TWITTER FOR ROASTING HIS DUMBASS RESPONSE TO THE GRAPHIC NOVEL STUFF!!
grown ass man scared of the 19-year-old queer being mean to him over his public meltdown more at 8.
#ramblez#little white boy sad? U sad bc nobody likes you? Bc u constantly make a fool of urself and show off ur distaste for ur fans? lmao#this is one of the greatest things to ever happen to me imagine how mad he'll be when he finds out the fangame Im making has queers in it#hes gonna have a whole other white boy meltdown on main KJSNFDGKJHFGKJHGKJHSDFGSD#hes so fucking sensitive maybe just get off of social media Mike this never ends well for you#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#and look Im joking around about this but it really is sad that the bendy devs cant handle this kind of critique towards their decisions#it seems despite the backlash once again they are choosing to ignore their fans which is yknow upsetting#But hey ig if the devs being awful was a dealbreaker for this fandom I wouldve left a long time ago and I havent#dw Im not going anywhere <3#also if anyone else here was also criticizing Mike maybe check his acct to make sure ur not blocked now since apparently#old habits die hard and this is certainly a pattern with him KJHDSFKGJHSDKFGJHDFGSD#also look before anyone asks yes I was kinda mean to him over this but to put bluntly if hes gonna be this dismissive to his fans concerns#he deserves it. Theres this persistent attitude esp in bendy fanspaces of being defensive of the devs#and I dont know why they have been extremely horrible people every single chance they get#and its very hurtful to see how many people would rather tell me to be kinder to the people who broke the heart of a child me when they#dismissed any ideas of putting queers like me in their stories than to realize Mike n Meatly bring this bad attention to themselves#to put bluntly I dont owe them kindness not until they at least apologize for the shit they did which they still havent#mike hasnt even addressed his vent poem in the code of BATDR let alone the other shit he said n did#so no I will not be kind to him ever hope this helps!
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
household enemy to the yyh watchthrough number one is the olympics. it's taken us a week to get two episodes into the gamemaster fight
#out of three. please the third episode's what makes it okay im fighting for my life out here#it is NOT for lack of trying on my part but theres only a brief window of time when the olympics is not happening#and as it turns out the watchthrough is Not my mom's first priority (how dare she etc)#i do feel slightly bitter that we've gotten through two eps of band o brothers in the same time#we are fighting for the same timeslots yet somehow the hour long show's gotten a leg up??#you don't have time for a 23 min ep but DO for a 60 min one?? explain the math to me please#idk how to explain the vague feeling of betrayal bc it Does Not make sense Nor matter in the slightest#but cmonnnn we were doing so well. and my little bro's starting up school again soon and my dad's gotta go back to work#sometimes eventually (<- hes on medical leave) and my grandparents are coming over next week We're Losing Time Soon#ughhh if i'd known the olympics were happening (<- somehow completely oblivious to this) i'd have accounted for#my mom getting whisked away by the land of synchronized divers and shot putters and whatever the hell#happens in the summer olympics (<- only pays attention to winter olys)#bc that always happens. and *i* have to go back to school in Some Amount Of Time Im Too Scared To Check (p sure it's late aug though) and#when that happens i'll (hopefully) be stuck across town which means we won't be able to do it any time besides the weekends#and i don't wannaaaaa#i know this is the least important problem anyone's ever had like i get that i know but#it's important to me that they sit down and watch this with me. and watching it pull apart and being#the one who's easily the most invested it makes me look all desperate when i ask them for their time and they can't give it#we can only pull this off neatly in the summer and we were so close and now we're losing it right at the finish line#i don't want life to get in the way of this little bubble i've fought so hard to make y'know#and it's childish and embarrassing and whatever but i just want them to have fun with me with this thing i care about a lot#but i can't do that bc my mom needs to watch the judo matches at Every weight class#even though she's recording a lot of them? i don't understand but whatever i know it's her thing im just moping about it ig#i want it to be as perfect an experience for them as possible and it's slipping away from me#and i don't wanna leave this project unfinished when i start school y'know. sighh#i think they might feel like i only want them around when we're watching stuff. whcih is weird bc that's like#The Singular Way we family bonded literally my whole life so idk why they wouldn't get that when reversed#but either way that IS how i wanna spend time with them. i want them to understand this thing that's become a part of me#and i wanna talk With them about it. and so far it's been fun in a way it's never been before. my mom at least seems to really like it#and i want it to Keep going well bc if we lose momentum im worried they'll start finding it tedious. sighh
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
"have you eaten?" "yes" i said, like a liar
#vent#ed tw#i havent been coping very well and i've been lying to my parents about my disordered eating in these past few days#i did have breakfast. and a chamomile. and a plain tofu burger. about 7 hrs ago#couldn't bring myself to eat anymore because i just. cant#i had a panic attack earlier and another one yesterday and im drained because i havent had this many in a row in years#and if im reverting back to how i was a decade ago im killing myself this time without a question because now i know how it goes#i feel like nothing could ever fix the situation im in in general in life and just thinking about it is sending me into a panic again#i feel so alone yet so overwhelmed and so stupid and so tired of everythibg#tomorrow i have breakfast with my friends and i cant just not eat because they will absolutely force me to#like theyve been around long enough to just know without asking too many questions but still making sure i eat#also i didnt plan anything for lunch and my fridge is half empty bc i didnt have the physical strength to go grocery shopping#so i have i think yoghurt bananas tofu burgers and water#also one tomato. just checked#im so tired i want to die and not out of despair but out of exhaustion#like. i did what i had to do in this life. failed miserably. seen enough. i dont think being here for any longer would be fun#sorry if you followed me via ao3. i vent a lot here. sorry.#being an adult with these issues that teens usually have is mortifying. genuinely
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
Funny reveal scenario: they turn it into a game.
So post-sentitwins becoming human/freed from amoks + no identities ever being revealed so far, Marinette perfected her anti-akuma charms and started distributing them to very temporary miraculous user. Realizing that keeping all of the miraculous in one place is too risky in case Hawkmoth finds out her identity, Marinette basically gives out all the miraculous to their users permanently.
Cue emotional reve between Adrien and Marinette with love confessions, fireworks, tears, yadda yadda you know the drill.
Onto the fun stuff: the other miraculous users are told that they all go to the same school or are related to people who go there and they basically make a scavenger hunt where the winner is the one who knows the most identities.
Cue side effect shenanigans:
Nino realizing that Adrien purrs. Alya noticing that Marinette is eating a shit ton more meat. Zoe and Chloe having a sudden taste for nectar. Juleka suddenly becomjg one of the most athletic students in the entire school. Juleka noticing her brother's new habit of swelling food whole. Kim and Nathaniel having competitions to see who's the best climber. The entire squad needing to DIY their hair products because it's all turning to furs and feathers. Kagami witnessing how Felix's wardrobe slowly becomes a rainbow. Nino, Kagami, Juleka, and Luka suddenly having a deep love of water and swimming. Have of the class going vegetarian or mostly carnivorous.
Just everybody doing the spiderman meme whenever the figure each other out.
All I can imagine is the extensive research and gaslighting that would go on
Nino looking real hard at Alya winning a game of tag by pouncing on someone with a hands first nosedive. Alya saying that’s just what it’s like having little sisters. Nino, who only has a little brother, can neither confirm nor deny, and Chloe refuses to give him a straight answer
Adrien in the middle of an article about peacock behavior when Felix enters the room wearing a mix of bright blues, purples, and pinks. He begins to suspect Felix has a crush on Luka
Chloe and Zoe clocking eachother immediately after catching eachother in the kitchen at 3 am to sneak in their bug food. They both maintain the stance that its perfectly normal to eat nectar, and actually it does wonders for the skin. Frankly, Kim, it’s rude you even asked
Max getting caught be Alix and Kim when he becomes faster than them
Juleka catching Luka trying to eat an egg whole, shell and all. He swears up and down its boiled. She asks if its his. You see Luka, hognose snakes will sometimes-
Kagami tells people the scales that keep appearing on her skin are a genetic condition from her father’s side
Rose starts to snort when she laughs, but no one catches on
Marc catches Nathaniel trying to eat his pencil, which he says is normal artist behavior, which Marinette firmly denies
Marinette pointing out Rose’s new laugh, Marc’s new hair feathers (which he had tried to hide under his hoodie), and Zoe’s tendency to be drawn to light to stir up even more chaos
#mlb#mlb headcanon#mlb juleka#mlb luka#okokok im not 100% sure this makes sense so ill elaborate here a bit#felix is wearing the bi flag colors#i dont think we ever get like any father mentioned at all for kagami (to my memory) so i hc her has only having a mother#especially bec she was made with the peacock miraculous#the nathaniel thing is meant to be a joke about goats trying to eat everything#also sidenote#the hognose thing is real#also mari cant really play bec she gave out the miraculous so she just stirs the pot for her own entertainment#ik i usually hc that kagami just doesnt lie but i honestly think its so funny in this instance#normally so honest kagami lies to your face to win the lying to your face game#and it works bec she never lies#oh shit also the thing with zoe was her being drawn to light like a moth#also hi lex!!!#thanks for the ask#id send you asks but every time ive checked you dont have an ask box#which is fine#ofc#its your ask box
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
people are really so weird and so fatphobic huh
(and oops most of my commentary is in the tags XD)
#people really out here acting like some chocolate is gonna kill you#idk maybe you should check how stats and data actually work and not just blindly trust things that get it wrong and such#because hate to break it to ya but increased risk does not equal absolute risk#it just increases the risk which is normally only by a small margin and doesnt mean anything in reality because it doesn't mean that it's#absolutely 100% going to happen that's not what risk or increased risk means#anyway this reminds of when a friend of mine took part in a study#and they were like oh yeah you have a 6% chance of a heart attack in the next 10 years#they asked if they lost weight would that decrease by a lot and the person was like uhh by like 1% it's really not the big deal everyone#makes it out to be people are just fatphobic because that's the society we've built that at all times you must be skinny#or you aren't worth anything or worse when people act like you're such a strain on the system#and that you dont deserve to have healthcare like i will scream#everyone needs to stop being so damn weird about it!!!!!!!!!!#it's literally fine it's so literally fine#you know actually thinking about increased risk with alcohol and smoking - to which is totally your choice and up to you btw#i knew someone who smoked like a chimney and drank like a fish and lived to his 70s and died of something completely unrelated#increased risk is just that increased by a certain percentage which is like not a lot in the grand scheme of things to really put it into#perspective when you have like 1 in 100 chance and the increased risk is 100% that just raises it to 2 in 100 which yes is just 1% to 2%#i will scream when people act like food is going to kill you - especially when it gets so bad people act like fruit is bad for you because#of sugar like i will cry i will start sobbing because all of this is why im pretty sure most people have disordered eating#if not full on eating disorders and that's the real concern how our attitudes make people change their behaviours and develop mental health#conditions because society is just so insistent on this one issue that you can't escape it's bad it's so bad and i hope one day#we get past all this and people can just live how they want without others getting on their backs#fatphobic people are the reason why so many people i know think they're worthless and ugly and i just that's so upsetting to me and yes yes#there's the major issues like doctors ignoring symptoms in favour of just lose weight! and then just send people into the world with 0 help#in that oh and oops now they've got an eating disorder when the problem in the first place was not weight <.<#and even if it was (which it rarely ever is) it's like okay where's the help then because there is no help and then study after study is#like oh btw dieting doesnt work lol and then what do you do what do you do im gonna start screaming hdfghsdfg#anyway sorry these tags are long im just so tired and so frustrated at the world and i hope one day people get over themselves
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
"If your entire body is replaced by speedforce are you really the same person you started out as? "
i mean seeing as how skin cells work in the real world I gotta go with "obviously"
I gotta tell ya, if your brain completely dies and then rebuilds itself from scratch then you might wanna go see a doctor. Same for any nerve cell, really.
Cause yeah, skin cells do replace themselves at a very quick rate but your brain? You're stuck with what you got. And, uh, it's arguably the most important part. It's what makes you 'you'.
#you get a set stock of neural precursor cells and your brain builds itself throughout adolescence#once you are out of precursor cells thats it. you get one brain. no take backs#so yeah the Ship of Theseus doesn't really apply to the traditional human body cause your brain definitely doesn't replace itself#youve got major fucking issues if it does. like it'll rework some pathways here and there but hooooo boy that stuff is pretty important#you do not want the brain going offline for renovations#also technically bones don't either. though thats weirder cause they can make new bone growth but you aren't ever losing the old bone cells#cept teeth#and the bones that fuse together#so yeah nerves and bones. you're kinda stuck with them#also high-key pretty sure the heart as well but im too tired to double check that#and gametes in AFAB peeps#so ye. the question very much does still stand. if your entire fucking body gets obliterated and rebuilt. are. you. still. you?
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Mmm Jeanne
#servants cant learn new stuff (i'll talk about jalter in a second) therefore#jeanne shouldnt know how to read or write#we actually Dont get a confirmation that she can do those things in summer 3. because the book that jalter thought jeanne wrote#was actually Her own book#jeanne works with marie. maybe she comes up with the ideas and does rough drawings that marie would be Delighted to bring to life#marie reads to jeanne is my image#jalter taught herself how to read and write and i think that was possible because of the unstability of her existence#if you try to teach jeanne how to read and write it will stick for a second but if like idk 15-20 min pass she would likely find herself#unable to read again and her writting to be suboptimal#she can sign her own name ofc thats historical#she can recite the bible from memory iirc#i love jalter's ability to be her own person even if it comes with the fact that she is very much. an ephemeral dream#like her FCKING SKILL IS CALLED.#WHY MUST YOU HURT ME LIKE THIS FGO#anyway. now jeanne again but physical#oughhh thank u for the support in the tags when i said jeanne should have self image issues because she looked different in life#i hadnt fully talked bout it i just went with hair but yeah. i need to check again because im pretty sure her body wasnt Suuuper different#but i just gotta confirm#but im just so i love the idea of her just not liking the way she manifested abd not knowing Why she manifested like that#when there are Countless depictions of her with her short brown hair#sieg looks to the side whistling (its not his fault but he knows the pseudo servant part#and its probably a mix of . fate apocrypha's manifestation and of how some people imagined jeanne looked like#but it still upsets her#not that she'd ever complain to people#you can probably get it out of her tho#unrelated and only to those who reached this far: im thinking of a singularity set in 15th century orleans in the Middle of the hundred year#war. but the difference aint “oh jeanne d'arc came back to life evil” rather than “there seems to be a battle here where it shouldnt and oh#my god is that jeanne- oh god jeanne d'arc fucking died--#and chaldeas has to try and fix the war without living breathing jeanne d'arc#actually thats not the middle of the 100yearwar but yknow what i mean. also haha jk unless...
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
nobody warned me that a side effect of adderall was having the irrational urge to throw away every single thing you own and completely reset ur life bc it's just too much. and also being a little bit really fucking angry all the time. but only a little. but also if somebody looks at me wrong i'm going to snap. and also i need to get all of this shit out of my house i cannot deal with it i can't even clean it i just need to throw everything out it's too much it's too much ahhhhhhhhh
#losing my fucking mind over here#also people were pissing me off at work today#i hate when other people are fucking stupid and completely misunderstand the most basic thing ever and then turn around and#make it look like i did something wrong and am the stupid person who is competent at my job#when like. NO YOU JUST CANT FUCKING READ AND ALSO I ALREADY ANSWERED YOUR QUESTION TEN GODDAMN TIMES#like they have the fucking reading comprehension of a worm and then have the audacity to act like i messed something up#me: very carefully checking and double-checking with my attorney to make sure i don't break the court's sequestration rule#this other person: JUST INCLUDES THE PEOPLE THAT ARE SUPPOSED TO NOT BE ON THE EMAIL ON SAID EMAIL AND PROCEEDS TO#DIRECTLY SAY “MEL PLEASE INCLUDE ALL PARTIES ON FUTURE EMAILS”#god i almost quit on the fucking spot#still seething with rage#talk#text#mine#not nct#ignore.mel#and like. there's a lot more cleaning i wanted to do this weekend that i just. couldn't start#bc i just froze up looking at all the Crap that i have#and i jsut want to throw it all out throw it all out throw it all out like just get rid of everything i own actually#feel like im going to rip my hair out rn frfr#anyway going to listen to some music very loudly stare at my ceiling and hopefully eventually go to sleep
1 note
·
View note
Text
man imagine if i actually did a writeup for every one of my private verses so people knew what the hell was going on in them lol
#✦ ooc#like im sure some shit is so weird to see like#i'm so here for good dad bruce and i have so many verses with good dad bruce#but in the m&m verse in particular he kinda sucks a lot#and i'm sure that can be jarring for people to see lmao#especially for anyone new here#but honestly i think that's pretty much the only verse i have where he's kinda awful?#yeah i just checked#in every other verse bruce is at least decent#like yeah him and grownup jason have their issues#but jason has not dealt with the amount of awful shit from him that he has in m&m#we pick and choose canon here sorry not sorry lol#dean is his dad now in m&m and he's better off for it#he's also died a second time in that verse and got brought back totally human again?#so that's another big difference???#man i really should do a writeup but i have so many verses and that'd be so much effort#maybe one day#anyways if you're ever interested in knowing what the hell is happening in a verse/thread/meme reply feel free to reach out lmao#i will dump ALL the lore on you ;)
1 note
·
View note
Text
Im not low maintenance and the more i remember that the more i realize that no one has or makes time for me in any way. It doesn't matter. Bc if I'm not helping me then no one is.
#this sounds so sad#will i am sad#probably depressed even#are you ever just tired of being the one my person taking care of you?#i sure am#staying in a house full of my own fucking family and they let me sleep 4 fucking hours on the couch without anyone checking to see if i ate#i can't really cook what i want at the moment since i don't live here seriously and there's no space for that#personal#i miss living alone#i miss not needing my mother#i feel unwell in way that words cannot envelop#im going to smoke after i eat and maybe it'll cheer me up
0 notes
Text
.
#tw disordered eating#no because at what point do I admit to myself that just because it’s wrapped up in a couple extra layers of neurodivergence and sensory#sensitivity at the end of the day I find comfort in not eating and the control of hunger#and like I genuinely don’t have enough energy to get through the day because im simply not eating enough and can’t remember the last time#i have and like at what point do I admit that this is actually a problem#cause like I haven’t seriously looked into a job for the summer cause im like. idk if ill be able to feed myself#but I keep being like ‘oh it’s just an adhd issue’ ‘it’s a meal prep issue’#what if it’s a fear of change issue#what if starving myself is the only goddamn thing I can control in this world even if I don’t admit to myself#i don’t know what to do and I don’t know how to get better#and I have so much shame because I grew up hearing about my mom having an eating disorder in her twenties and it was always like well don’t#worry mom you’re raising me with a better relationship with food so I won’t have that issue#well guess who’s in their twenties and went to one session with a dietician and the dietician was concerned they were malnourished lmao#(i don’t think i checked off enough of the symptoms to actually qualify. but still. the fact that it was a consideration?)#and I just. I literally don’t know where im going to go this summer#because I need someone to teach me how to eat. to teach me how to grocery shop and meal prep and cook#because I KNOW im capable of all those things but no one has ever walked me through all the steps so it’s too scary to me rn to do#but I literally cannot even fathom making anyone put up with my presence for 3 months let alone being like ‘oh also will you help me get#better? cause I’ve tried on my own and it’s just not working’#i just put the tw here but I moved it to the top so people could be warned before reading but#love that I refuse to use anything other than that tag because that would be admitting this was real#im just starving myself and never gained back the weight I lost four years ago from starving myself im sure this is all suuuuuper normal and#just a silly little phase#(fr tho if i need any other tws let me know i don’t wanna trigger anyone)
1 note
·
View note