#im not exactly in a great place myself
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caffeinatedopossum · 2 years ago
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All of my friends are either suicidal or have anorexia or both and I don't know what to do with all of this worry
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mainfaggot · 5 months ago
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the last time i felt emotionally fulfilled in a friendship was when i was 15, and before that when i was 13. im turning 21 next month
#my current close friends are really great but my depression gets in the way and it's really hard to tell them about my feelings lol#so i basically make my chronic loneliness worse by distancing myself and isolating etc#they still like me though... weirdly#well probably bc we're all mentally and emotionally unwell! we get one another's issues#but i cant bring myself to say a lot of things i would otherwise want to... since i feel so misunderstood#even when i have tried to talk about things they just dont process them the way im hoping they will#and it's not their fault!!! it's my fault for expecting someone to understand exactly what im saying when i say it#i almost always find words for things. i describe them in detail. and i think thats where things get too unique and too confusing actually#so they cant personally understand#like i said. not their fault!#i just miss this one friend i had briefly in 8th grade#i was getting outcasted from everyone in my own class. she was in the classroom next door#i don't remember how we crossed paths but we did and she was so smart and so understanding#and we just clicked#i remember running in a field with her. she was so.. everything#i miss her#and when i was 15 i remember talking about all of my mental issues with this classmate and we immediately saw each other as mirror images#it was crazy... we also had a lot of interests in common and we looked out for each other#she's doing a lot better nowadays which is why we're no longer in contact probably#it's hard to be friends when one of you is stuck in one place so i dont really blame her#we drifted apart anyway. i bet if i asked she'd still make time for me a few times a year#i just didnt ask because it felt like the mutual understanding we had ended#shes a different person now. and for the better too! i shouldn't interfere in her happiness#z.post
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widevibratobitch · 1 year ago
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do i let feminism lose and spend all of my savings on a rhinoplasty or do i continue to just. live Like That lol
#kms idk what to do#it's doing research on best surgeons in your country hours while your friends with normal noses are sleeping#anyway it's been a great little vacation and i had a lot of fun but the absolute fucking dread whenever someone is taking a picture#and i cant control how it looks. is ruining all the fun.#i said fuck it once today and then saw that picture my friend took of me and wanted to yeet myself into traffic straight away#the worst thing is im obsessed with big unusual conventionally unattractive noses. i love them.#but mine is not this hot sexy aquiline kind. its just a huge round bulbous fucking potato in the middle of my face#its the kind of nose no one will ever find pretty or hot or even interesting. its just comical. it looks like a fake clown nose.#and while it is indeed very in character of me to have a fucking clown nose attached to my face 24/7 forever#its literally making me wanna wear a paper bag over my head#goddd idk. cause like. what if something goes wrong lol knowing my luck it definitely could#and then uhhhh idk i guess i really would just kms lol#funny thing - didn't even really notice it before uni. like i always knew there was something seriously fucking wrong with my face#but could never put a finger on what it is exactly#and then this uni friend made that one comment about my nose and suddenly everything clicked into place#you're absolutely right queen the fucking nose aka the CENTRAL thing on my face is the main culprit here lol#anyway not a day has gone by since then that i wouldnt look into the mirror and felt awful and pathetic about it <3#i am ready to go against all of my ideals and just do it. ill have no money left but maybe its worth it. to get a little peace of mind. idk.
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sophsicle · 4 months ago
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listen, we’re all here in this space engaging in hp content in the year of our lord 2024 and i’ll be honest with you, i do not feel great about that. hate it, actually. but i comfort myself with the belief that what we’re doing in this space a lot of the time is critically engaging with the og text and the politics of its author not mindlessly consuming or supporting it. which is why it makes me INSANE when people in this space go out and buy licensed merch or play the video games or watch the sequels or prequels or spin-offs or whatever the heck they’re doing these days, or buy the books (like guys u can steal all that shit you know that right??? what are you doing) or go to the studio or the theme park or WHATEVER. it especially makes me insane when they go to those places or do those things and talk about fanfiction because like. i feel implicated now. i am not interested in providing free advertising for Joanne goddamn Rowling. i thought we were on the same page here boys. and like i said, i get it, we’re all here, me included, so im not exactly speaking from a moral high ground, but goddamnit the least we can do is not give her our money fuck me.
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paper-mario-wiki · 10 months ago
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you do such a good job passing! any tips?
thank you, i appreciate that! i dont have a ton of tips since ive only been at it for a little over half a year, and im kinda flying by the seat of my pants cuz i dont have a lot of people i talk to day-to-day about presentation. pretty much everything ive figured out by myself and with youtube tutorials. regardless, heres a few i can think of:
don't be afraid to go to a makeup store and ask for advice. i brought a picture of myself i put through faceapp to give me makeup, and i showed it to the ladies at sephora, who were able to get me exactly what i was looking for. theres a world of difference between a face full of makeup, and a face full of makeup that's slightly the wrong shade, and it's good to get the opinions of experts.
try to look at the other women in your family and see how they style themselves, or do their makeup, or even how they speak or carry themselves. finding a look that works isn't somethin that you can fall into super easily, you have to go searching for it. try to model yours after the people who literally share your genes and therefore your features. (note, the opposite is equally usable for transmascs, look at your brothers, fathers, and uncles)
spend time in the mirror seeing what looks right. comb your hair in different directions, part it in a different place, put a clip in, dye it a different color, etc. put on makeup and then take it all off, then put on way too much and only take half of it off. learn the muscle memory of holding a liquid eyeliner pen in your non dominant hand and tracing it across the eyelid on the opposite side of your face without twitching your eye. nobody will see you, you're in your own bathroom. with the resources you have, treat the Bathroom Fit Check like you're customizing a character in a videogame.
look for your angles! i wish i could look good at every angle, but i don't, and vanishingly few people actually do. i spent a lot of time looking at myself in my front-facing phone camera from different directions and thinking "fuck im never going to pass, i really dont look great. is this even worth it?" and no matter how much doubt i had, in the long run the answer ended up being yes, it is worth it. that's kinda how hard things are: they suck until they don't anymore.
this one is really simple and may not apply to you, but fix your posture. seriously. when i started standing up straight for a few weeks i noticed an change in how i looked and carried myself (and my back doesnt hurt as much now)
come to terms with the fact that a lot of women look like men, and a lot of men look like women. the idea that all men look one way and all women look the other is an propagandstic invention of the state that should not be taken seriously. (note: this tip works only inwardly as a facet of self actualization. no matter what, you will always run into people who buy into the propaganda. to the best of your ability, pay them no mind.)
im sorry i cant give you anything more, but thats kind of a big question to answer, so i hope this helps!
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alexendria-rose · 5 months ago
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Who are you?~
Stephen Strange x Reader!Stark
Warnings: smut, baby girl nickname, dominate Stephen, age gap (20 ish years) cussing, choking.
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Stephen sat by the bar a martini in his hand regretting telling Tony Stark that he would make it to yet another victory party- even though Stephen was pretty sure it was just an excuse for Tony to have another party. With the mission they all had; it was probably a good idea on Tony’s part to release some tension that was weighed on their shoulders from the mission.
“Hey pretty boy- do you want more of that drink?” Natasha said with a soft laugh as she leaned across the bar counter. Stephen rolled his eyes but a smile placed on his face.
“You know I could just refill it myself.” He commented a slight cocky look on his face- Nat just rolled her eyes.
“Hey im being nice to you- don’t be cocky mr magic.” She laughs taking his cup and refilling his martini drink. She handed to him and he did a quiet thank you. His eyes snapped towards a young woman in a black dress- who laughed loudly at what Thor was saying to her; most likely trying to impress the young girl. Stephen almost dropped his drink when she caught his eyes. Why hasn’t he seen her before? She was gorgeous, h/l h/c hair and when she looked around he caught the color of her eyes. They were so bright and full of youth and life. Natasha notices this laughing lightly.
“Ah so you’ve finally caught your eye on her?” Natasha says titling her head at the sorcerer seeing the way he didn’t want to remove his eyes from her. He looks back mouth slightly open before clearing his throat.
“Who is that?” He questions rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. Nat just smiles knowing exactly who she was but wanted to see how this would play out.
“Why don’t you go see.” She hummed before turning around to prepare more drinks for the guests. Stephen had a cocky smile on his face before doing exactly what Natasha had suggested. He straightened his suit before walking over to the mystery girl.
“And that’s why I can be the only whom can hold the hammer!” Thor boomed loudly as she laughed at how loud and energetic Thor could be.
“So you have to be worthy? So if it’s on an elevator- does that mean the elevator is worthy?” she cocked her head to the side- her gaze pure and full of interest.
“You’re very funny Lady- Oh Mr. Wizard!” Thor exclaims looking at Stephen who was behind her ready to go up to introduce himself. She turns around to face the sorcerer smiling from ear to ear.
“Oh hi.” She chuckles bringing up her martini up to her lips. Stephen swore his breath caught in his throat when he saw her up close- she was stunning.
“Hi. My name is Doctor Stephen Strange.” He said bringing his hand out- she giggled before taking his hand giving it a firm shake.
“I knew that already but hi.”
“So you’re not going to tell your name?” He chuckles bringing his hand back away from her touch suddenly missing the feeling of warmth.
“I’m afraid if I tell you Doctor- you’ll run away and I don’t know about you but I don’t want you too.” She smirked- ah so a flirt she was. Stephen grinned leaning against the wall closest to them.
“Oh? Is that so?” He sipped on his drink as he looked at her- she couldn’t be more than 23 years old. Young- maybe a little too young for him but god was she the most gorgeous girl he’s ever seen. “I think I can handle it.” He hummed. She walked closer to him tilting her head.
“No- I don’t really think you could Doctor Strange.” She smiled softly poking his chest. “Have a great night.” She winked at him before walking away from the sorcerer. Stephen watched as she walked away- her hips swaying. She knew she was a tease, she knew that Stephen strange was completely attracted to her. Only if he knew she loved to play games.
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Stephen rubbed his forehead with his fingers as he looked up at Tony explaining their next mission. That’s when she walked in. The mystery girl from the party.
“Aye there’s my girl.” Tony smiles softly. She smiles widely giving Tony a side hug- her eyes landing on Stephen.
“Hey Y/n.” Natasha smirks looking between the two knowing Stephen had no idea yet and that made it much more entertaining.
“So y/n is your name?” Stephen smirks leaning back on the god awful office chair. Y/n smiles softly looking at Tony- who was glaring daggers towards Stephen.
“How do you know my daughter doctor?” Tony asked as he crossed his arms his gazing never leaving Stephen. Stephen almost choked- eyes wide as Natasha sat there giggling like a maniac. Y/n bit her lip nervously watching Stephen’s reaction.
“I met him at the party dad- don’t worry about it.” She said flicking her dad’s nose a smile on her face- that made Stephen basically swoon.
“So you’re Y/n Stark?” Stephen whispered rubbing his gotee mentally face palming himself. He flirted with Tony’s daughter- god she must be so young then. Tony kept his gaze on Stephen.
“Stay. Away.” Tony groaned. Stephen smirked lightly moving his gaze from Tony back to Y/n as she used that little flirt smile; basically begging him to not stay away.
“I’ll see you guys later.” Y/n grins walking away from the meeting. Stephen heart thumping against his chest as he watched her walk away.
“No- don’t think about it.” Tony warned pointing a finger towards Stephen. “She is 23 years old-“
“So why isn’t that I didn’t know you had a daughter Tony?” Stephen laughed leaning against the chair crossing his arms.
“Because- I like to keep her safe and away from public eye.” Tony grumbled. Stephen hummed smirking a bit. “Now stay away!” Stephen tried to… he really did.
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And there she was again- he’s bumped into her everywhere now. The kitchen, in the training room, anywhere and everywhere. He watched as she read in the common room, her knees curled up to her chest- as she let the tv roll with a random show as a background noise. He knew it was creepy to watch but she looked so peaceful. He kept hearing Tony’s voice- “stay away” but god was it so hard. She was beautiful and brought a certain light in the room. He watched as she slowly chewed the bottom of her lip- reading glasses framing her face, a messy bun on top of her head. Stephen needed to talk to her- instead of small talk it was driving him crazy. He ran a hand through his hair before walking up to her on the couch.
“Must be interesting whatever you’re reading.” He mutters lightly. She looks up from her book a small smile on her face.
“I mean it is Harry Potter- of course it is.” She giggled placing her book down on her lap. “I mean you would know about wizards huh? Did you come from Hogwarts?” She jokes- she was a lot like her father.
“Haha-“ he laughs sarcastically sitting himself down on the couch before looking at her. “I’m a sorcerer by the way- not a wizard.”
“That’s not what my dad says. I’m pretty sure you’re a wizard.” She smirked tilting her head in a cocky way that made Stephen’s heart thump.
“Does it look like I have a wand?” He joked back at her- she just laughed lightly rolling her eyes moving herself dangerously close to him.
“I don’t know. Do you?” She flirted batting her eyelashes- she knew she was cute, she knew she was a flirt and she used that to her advantage when it came to Stephen strange. Stephen looked at her when she moved herself closer to him- her batty lashes and pouty lips.
“You know you’re a flirt don’t you?” He chuckled lightly his face moving dangerously close to hers-
“Only with you- I told you, you’d run when you found my name.” She smirked moving her head away from his- Stephen let out the breath he was holding noticing the small smirk on her lips. He knew she was playing a very dangerous game. He looked around his surroundings to notice no one was in fact here- he decided to take a very dangerous step, that could end up getting him killed by Tony but god she was all he could think about. He grabs her chin moving her head closer to his- his eyes flickering from her eyes to her lips.
“I didn’t run.” He mutters softly- smirking lightly seeing the blush that covered her cute face. He brings his face closer rubbing his nose against hers- her eyes fluttering close as his breath hits her soft lips. “I can tease too, you know.” He grinned letting go of her chin pulling his head away noticing the slight whimper and pout escaping her lips and face.
“No- you cannot get to do that and walk away.” She huffs standing up from the couch her arms crossed as she stared down at him. Stephen laughs lightly standing up to tower over her.
“You’re cute when you get mad.” Stephen chuckles deeply winking at her before walking away- he could hear her huff and plop back down on the couch.
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Stephen was determined to make Y/n stark blush, and wanting to more. They hung out all the time- of course when everyone was asleep. They would talk and flirt but most importantly he got to actually know the young stark- he found out she loves reading, and quite like her father; sassy, witty, silver tongue. He was enjoying her presents more and more. Dare to say he was actually falling for her.
Stephen groaned again as he was at ANOTHER party of Tony starks- it wasn’t even a celebration. It was just a party because Tony got bored. Stephen smiled as he watched Y/n wearing a red mini dress trying her absolute best to get Stephen’s attention and god it was working. He sipped on his martini as he stared at her talking to Wanda- she kept glancing at Stephen behind her shoulder the red lipped smirk aimed at him, and every time she looked at him she would bit her lower lip in such a seductive way. She was waiting for him to break- and he was so close to. Stephen chewed the inside of his cheek before setting his glass down and marching over to her. He slyly wrapped an arm around her waist giving Wanda an apologetic smile.
“Wanda- May I borrow y/n?” Stephen asked- y/n eyes wide as she looked up at Stephen her head tilting in confusion. Wanda laughs waving her hand.
“Please do- she can’t stop looking at you anyhow.” Wanda sipping her wine. Stephen laughed lightly before guiding Y/n away from the party and into a secluded area- the idea of secluded area was the furthest bathroom away from the party. He brought her inside closing the door behind them before slamming her against the door. His look was full of lust- the teasing was too much for him at this point. Her eyes widen when he pushed her against the door. His hand on her lower stomach and his other on her cheek- his face was close to hers. He watched as she bit her lower lip nervously but a small smirk wanted to escape.
“Ah so you’re breaking huh?” She giggled lightly moving her leg in between his thighs, rubbing her foot up and down his leg. Stephen breath hitched moving his hand to place on the wall besides her head.
“You know I can show you what I do to naughty girls.” He purred lightly his heart beating against his chest not believing his own words that fell out of his mouth.
“Me naughty no-“ Stephen smashed his lips against hers before she can come back with a sarcastic and bratty comment. She almost gasped loudly at the contact but instead she decided to move her hands to his hair gripping onto it like her life depended on it. He groaned into the kiss his hands moving down to her waist gripping tightly which made a quick squeak escape her lips. He pulled back before immediately attacking her neck creating small love bites on her neck and making his way down to her chest. She moaned tugging on his hair roughly. “I want to go slow… but I cannot wait- don’t want people to be suspicious now do we?” He mumbled against her skin before turning her around to face the wall a gasp escaping her lips.
“N-No I guess not.” She whimpered, he chuckled deeply his hands on her hip. He ran his hand up and down her bare legs.
“Was this short dress for me love?” He smirked in cocky way. She chewed on her bottom lip at the way he caressed her legs, moving his hand between her thighs getting dangerously close.
“Maybe…” she squeaked. He just chuckled darkly before hitching up the dress to show her lacey black underwear.
“Oh my darling- as much as I love these. They need to be gone.” He growled before ripping off her underwear- which caused her to gasp loudly when he did so. The pool between her legs starting to become even more wet- if that was possible. “Look at you dripping for me darling girl.” He cooed. She blushed deeply trying to close her legs but he immediately kicked them apart. “No, keep them spread.” He purred- she heard the sound of him unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants which made her mouth go dry. She didn’t have much time to think as he shoved his hard cock inside of her tight pussy. She moaned loudly her hands going in front of her on the door to support herself.
“Fuck!” She shouted- Stephen chuckled gripping onto her hips as slowly moved himself in and out of trying to get to adjust to his size- her pussy was delightful was warm, tight and delicious.
“Baby girl- you are the most delightful thing I’ve ever had.” He groaned. “Think you’re fully ready for me?”
“D-Don’t hold back. N-need.” She stuttered gasping at every thrust- he was hitting her g-spot just right; everytime he would pull back slowly and then push himself inside of her just right. It made her mouth just water at the way he knew what he was doing. Both of their heads snapped when the door knob started turning. “Someone’s in-“ Stephen chuckles quietly before thrusting himself harder in her. “H-here!” She looked back and shot him a glare at his cocky face. He was loving this.
“Oh I’m sorry lady y/n! We were just looking for you!” Thors voice booms through the door. Y/n hitched a breath when Stephen started increasing his pace- that same cocky look on his face. She tried to calm down her uncontrollable breathing, trying not to slur out profanities and moans.
“N-No it’s okay! I’ll b-be out soon!” She was able to gasp out but it wasn’t helping that Stephen moved one of his hands to massage her very sensitive breast over her dress.
“Are you okay in there lady y/n?” Thor asks in concern. Y/n felt the tears threatening to come out of her eye pocket- not out of pain no out of pure pleasure. Stephen moved his hand to push the hair out of the way of her neck to place gentle kisses as he continued to pound into her his grip on her hip never leaving.
“I’m fine! I’ll be out soon Thor! Please!” She exclaimed her hand on the door scratching lightly throwing her head back- making Stephen wrap his hand around her neck.
“Alright alright- I’ll tell your father that you’ll be out there soon.” Thor laughs- she hears his footsteps walk away. Stephen laughed a bit gripping her neck more.
“Good girl.” He cooed making her pussy tighten around his hard cock making him grunt in the process. “Now sweetheart we’ve gotta make this fast- prepare yourself.” She nods not being able to make any sentences- but moan. He moved his hand down back to her hips; before forcing her hips to hit more into him. He rocked his hips against her- her moans sounded like pure bliss in his ears. The sound of skin and skin smacking together. He threw his head back grunting and moaning feeling himself close to the edge; and he knew she was too- with the way she was clenching around him.
“Fuck Stephen. I’m so close please.” She moaned out. Stephen grinned moving his head down to her ear kissing and nibbling her ear gently.
“Cum for me baby girl.” He mutters- as soon as those words escaped his lips. She screamed loudly her juices cumming around his cock. He smirked before going faster getting him closer to his edge. He gasped loudly before spilling his seed inside of her(god he hoped she was on the pill or something) he lazily placed his head on her back finishing himself out. He pulls out of her groaning at the loss of contact. He watched as his seed dripped down her leg- with the swish of his hand he removed and cleaned the seed off of her. She turned around to face him- her face flushed as she fixed her hair.
“You lost.” She hummed- he chuckled lightly placing his hand on her cheek before placing a soft peck on her lips.
“And I’ll lose a 1000 times over if it means that I get to do that as many times as I can.” He muttered. She giggled lightly picking up her underwear from the ground. He started fixing himself up- buckling his pants back on.
“If you’re cool with it- I never want this to stop.” She flirted before shoving her underwear in his pocket. “Now we should get back huh?” Stephen smiled lightly tracing her lips with his thumb.
“I was hoping you would say that; but yes we should probably get back.” He laughed gently- she giggled as well before opening up the door.
“Wait for a bit and then come out.” She said turning to look back at him. He nods smacking her ass in the process.
“So commanding my love.” She rolled her eyes before leaving Stephen alone in the bathroom. She walked back into the party- still seeing everyone was here. Tony looked over at his daughter- he walked over to her a drink in his hand.
“Where were you?” He asked titling his head at her -sipping his drink. She tried not to blush, and bit her bottom lip.
“Bathroom.” She muttered trying to turn away from him. Tony scrunched his eyebrows grabbing his daughter’s wrist pulling her back and when he did she saw the hickeys on her neck- more like covered all over her neck.
“Who the flying f put that on your neck!” Tony roared eyes widen- thinking of his daughter that way made him internally angry and mad. Y/n tried to look in his eye-line but then mentally face palmed herself. Fuck. Stephen soon shortly came walking in the same direction she had which had Tony look over. His face was red- when the dots connected. “Stephen Strange!”
Uh this was not going to be a fun conversation for any of them.
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Let me know what you think! You dirty little hoes 🫡🥰
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tojivu · 1 year ago
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Helloo!! I've came across ur fics a few times and it never fail to makes me smile, and I have an idea from scrolling on tiktok for a whole week, I'm not sure if ur reqs are still open... But may I request the orange peel theory with jjk men n boys? Your pick on who u want to write in that scenario! If ur req is close pls ignore this! Thank you and I hope you have an amazing day!
the things i do for you ! ⋆ jjk men
the orange peel theory ˖ gojo, geto, toji, nanami.
an. honestly i'm still kind of ??? on what exactly is the orange peel theory but i'm assuming it's just acts of service? im so sorry if its wrong LOL pls i don't keep up with tiktok......
an ii. ok i did end up getting the prompt wrong but i hope yall like this anyway..
cw. sfw. f!reader. not proofread. acts of service.
playing. lovesong by beabadoobee.
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GOJO SATORU is a familiar face at the local coffee shop down the block — and no, it's not because he keeps raiding their cheesecake displays. he much prefers the ones across the street; he only comes by this particular one to pick up your favourite coffee.
"toru, could you get something for me at the coffee place?"
"yeah, i can," he hums. "what do you need, baby?"
it's actually only a 5 minute walk, and you never told satoru your order. it was too specific that you were sure he would forget; so you just told him to buy an iced latte and be quick with it. after all, you could never go wrong with such a basic drink.
"'s okay, baby," he presses a quick kiss to your cheek, confident he would not come back home with a boring latte. "i'll get you something even better."
"please don't. your taste in coffee is terrible — no, forget it, i can just go by myself later." you groan, wriggling around in the sheets of your bed to find that warm spot in the blankets; satoru was up since 6am, and you've only just opened your eyes.
"oh, no need for that," your boyfriend smirks: almost too creepily. "i have great taste! both in coffee and women—"
you smack his arm, using your hands to gesture a shoo-ing motion. you weren't conscious enough to tolerate satoru's gross flirtations. his eyebrows furrow and lips pout, quickly planting another kiss on your forehead before standing up. he scrambles through the desk drawer for his sunglasses — eventually finding them and leaving the house.
little did you know that your boyfriend has your order memorised — it was a small order, not that difficult to remember. satoru didn't think it was necessary to make you get up and grab it yourself; he had legs, and he liked the fresh air, too. plus, he knows he'll get to see you smile first thing when you wake up; perhaps you might give him one of those kisses on the forehead that he loves so much.
you thought he would have called you lazy for not getting up — he would be offended you think so little of him if you admitted that. satoru sees your sleepy face, hears your peaceful snores and he thinks he would rather die by impalement than wake you.
when satoru returns, you're still tucked into bed and fast asleep. he leaves the coffee on the nightstand before kneeling down and leaving the third kiss of the day, right on your lips — and it's then that he realises that you have him so in love that he's willing to spend $8.95 every morning for the rest of his life on overpriced coffee.
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GETO SUGURU holds the most romantic date nights, but there's only one thing you don't particularly enjoy — that being there's always so much walking involved.
yes, you think the opportunity to just take a breath and link pinkies with suguru is nice; it's just that your shoes tend to undo themselves no matter how many bunny ears you tie. your laces have been through war — the plastic aglets have been long lost and the loose string is practically just that. they're starting to pull apart from eachother that you consider just wearing heels for the next few dates until you find better ones.
"we just need to turn the corner—"
suguru's words are cut off by your sighs. you look down at your shoelaces and they are once again untied; the pout on your lips make his curve upward, after he lets out a sigh of his own.
"i really need to get you new shoes," suguru mutters. "they've definitely been through it."
"can you tie them for me?"
it's a simple request that gets suguru on one knee, dress pants stained by the concrete dust, as you patiently wait for him to finish tying the knots he's so skilled at.
"the ones you tie never come out."
"that's a lie," suguru says, his voice a little muffled with the distance between your heads. his rough fingers miss the loop and he opts to restart the knot. "i tied them before we left the house, and look at them now."
your face flushes at that. he sees through your lie like glass — you were always so easy to read.
"i just like the way you tie them, sugu. plus, they only untied because i redid them myself."
"yeah, i think it's because i don't tie them like a preschooler," suguru teases — he ties the knot tightly and stands up. "you should learn how to tie them the right way, baby."
you shake your head, and he raises an eyebrow at your reaction. his left pinky reaches for yours again, before you two start to walk once more.
"why do i need to learn if i have you?"
there's silence for a bit, nothing but cars honking and chattering from the people enjoying the nightlife just as you were — you almost retract your statement when suguru looks at you expectantly.
"is that so?" suguru chuckles at your response. "i guess you're right."
you giggle at his seemingly sarcastic reply — but you don't see the way he smiles, the way the tips of his ears burn, nor do you hear the loud thumping of his heart that tell he is being serious.
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TOJI FUSHIGURO doesn't know what small is.
well, everything about him is big — his body, his mind, his bank account, his heart.
it took you awhile to figure that last one out, though. toji always does the big things. the extravagant, flaunting, costly things. it's only small to him, and it often takes you a lot of convincing to get him to not spend hefty amounts of cash on you.
he feels it's necessary, to take care of his sweet girl like any man should — toji knows nobody can pamper you as well as he does, so he makes sure his money is spent wisely in making you feel safe and content.
you don't know how to tell him that there's no need for all of it, that you just want him to be with you — it's only until one day when you're coughing and sneezing in bed that you have to, after toji's constant pestering about hiring a family doctor.
"tch, baby," toji's voice echoes throughout the spacious bedroom. "shit—you're burning up."
"i'm fine," your voice is hoarse, nose crinkling at the incoming sneeze. "achoo!—"
he frowns, and the scar on his lip shifts downward. he sits on the edge of the bed, thick fingers moving stray hairs away from your face. "told ya we shouldn't have gone last night."
you shake your head. "it was your friend's birthday."
"does it matter, [name]?" he sounds stern. he only ever acts strict with you when he's really worried. "y'were already falling sick yesterday."
you reach for the box of tissues, fingers trying to reach inside the packaging for another piece, but you seem to have used all of them up — the 3rd time today.
"can you stay home, toji?"
it's one simple request that has him nodding. if you didn't mention it, he thinks he would've forgotten all about work — toji was much too worried to let you stay home alone, while a random doctor he hires on the day of attends to you. he much rather take care of you himself.
"i think i'll fuckin' have to," toji answers, frown plastered on his face out of pure worry; he has no idea how happy his reply makes you — you were more than comfortable with the idea of him taking care of you. "'m too worried to let you be alone."
"thank you, toji," you smile up at him and he feels his face burn up, so much that he thinks he feels hotter than you; "you always take such good care of me."
he always does. there was no doubt about it.
it's then that toji fushiguro stands up, his feet quick in making it's way to the bathroom to prepare a cold towel to plaster on top of your forehead. his actions are quick, wanting to make you feel better as soon as possible; your pale lips and tired eyes worried him more than he'd like to admit.
he ends up cooking the worst chicken noodle soup ever, but you chug it down with a grateful smile and a kiss to toji's cheek.
"fuck," he mumbles, sounding almost annoyed. "think i'm gonna get a fever now, too."
the smirk on his face tells you everything, though — at least now he knows money can't buy this.
────────────────────────
NANAMI KENTO is the type of man to do as you please, whenever you please, even if it's something you didn't even ask for.
he loves to see the smile on your face, the way your eyes sparkle when he agrees to help you with something just because you want him to — he can never get sick of the way your voice thanks him.
this is especially true in times of emergency.
it's a friday night and you're having dinner with nanami, legs crossed underneath the marbled tabletop — your silk emerald green dress flows perfectly, hugs your body just right; you think you did a good job picking it out today.
nanami had a range of activities planned out for tonight. it was your anniversary — dinner, then a film festival, then whatever surprise he kept a secret after.
you didn't try to snoop this time, genuinely thrilled to have such a special night with your lover; you were always one to love surprises, especially the ones from nanami.
beautiful, slow tempo jazz plays in the italian restaurant — you feel like you're from a different time, enjoying such authentic food.
"ken," you smile. "you should try some of this."
he doesn't respond for a bit. he's been looking at you with dreamy eyes, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lip; it's not until you giggle that he snaps out of whatever state he was just in.
"sorry, darling," nanami clears his throat. "you just look absolutely breathtaking tonight."
you physically feel the blood rush to your cheeks, too fast that it's almost embarrassing: kento truly knew how to fluster you.
you spin the fork in your hand clockwise, picking up a ball of pasta. "do i not look breathtaking every night?"
nanami chuckles, fingers controlling the knife sawing away at the steak that sits ready on his plate. "stop teasing. you know i think you're beautiful every second—"
plop.
your eyes widen, feeling a damp spot on your thigh. your fork suddenly feels lighter, and your eyes dart down to your dress that now has a patch of spaghetti sauce.
your eyes forcefully close shut in embarrassment, fingers rubbing your temples as you sigh.
"shit," you curse under your breath. "i'm sorry, kento."
he smiles, shaking his head. "what are you apologising for? you didn't drop it on purpose."
nanami sees the frown that drags your smile away, and he feels his heart sink. he knows you really loved that dress — and so he asks you to just enjoy your meal and that he'll make something work.
it's then that his plan derails, just a little. you two are running late to the film festival, but he couldn't think of any better solution.
"wait a little, okay?"
nanami parks the car, and his feet quickly lead him out and into the mall for a little over 10 minutes — when he returns, it's with a black bag with gold printed letters.
oddly familiar, you think.
he steps into the driver's seat, shuts the door and opens the bag: it's the same dress you're wearing, just in a different colour — blue.
nevertheless, you can't help the smile that creeps up on your face. "ken.. you really didn't—"
"yes, i had to." he interrupts. "i know it's not green, but i hope it's okay."
"thank you, love." you say, voice too sweet that nanami remembers all the reasons he does these things for you — he thinks he'll never get tired of it.
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020224 — happpyy february ! also i think nanami's one is a little ermm but we rock we roll life moves on yolo :( i got lazy towards the end but i tried Okay
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duc-kie · 2 years ago
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Hii darlinggg, how about some headcannons with how the HP men take care of you while youre stressed or something. Im in the mood for some fluff.
Take your time, ✌️
finally wrote something again I’m actually so proud of myself. my life has been so busy lately I don’t even know my name anymore. this is quite short and it doesn’t contain many characters in it but it was easier to write it like this.
thank you so much for the request and the patience🫶🏻 hope you enjoy my hp fluff hcs
(it contains Cedric Diggory, draco malfoy, Mattheo riddle, Tom riddle)
———————————————————————
CEDRIC DIGGORY
- now he’s just the sweetest I love him. he’d know EXACTLY what to do to help you relax.
- (depending on what you like) he’d run you a hot bubble bath, put on a movie, cuddle with you, take you out on a dinner date or a picnic date, or he’d take you shopping etc.
- he’d hold you the whole night and tell you how proud of you he is and make you smile as much as possible.
- the next morning you better be ready for breakfast in the morning with the sweetest note and flowers next to it. he’d even cuddle you while you eat or give you a massage.
- literally a 100/10 I want him so bad.
DRACO MALFOY
- he might not appear as soft at first but he really is when you get to know him.
- he would try to distract you from the thing that was stressing you out so he’d put on a movie and prepare some snacks.
- then he’d cuddle you while you both watch the movie.
- he would fall asleep holding you and in the morning he’d bring you some breakfast in bed.
MATTHEO RIDDLE
- he can also be very sweet when you really get to know him and he always knows how to comfort you.
- he’d also distract you from whatever is stressing you out. he would take you to the slytherin common room at night when everyone is asleep and he’d cuddle you and read to you next to the fire place. he’d also make sure you have your hot cocoa and the softest blanket he could find.
- when he could tell you were tired he’d carry you back to his dorm and cuddle you to sleep.
- the next day he would make sure you have a great day and that you weren’t stressed anymore.
TOM RIDDLE
- now Tom riddle is sweeter after you’ve been together for a while BUT he’s still not very sweet.
- he’d act as if he doesn’t care at all but deep down he does a little.
- I feel like he’d go on a walk with you and let the nature take care of your stress so he doesn’t have to.
- at night he’d cuddle you as best as he could.
- the next morning wouldn’t be anything special, maybe he’d help you study if that’s what was causing your stress.
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 9 months ago
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Okay here's one. I really dont think I'm the asshole but my ex sure does.
AITA for refusing to buy my partner a jar of pickles?
So this story has like, a little background and some confounding factors i think but i really could go both ways on whether i was the asshole.
Ill start with both my ex (21nb) and i (23f) had severe mental health issues and were working on treatment when we were together. Theyd been in and out of inpatient stays throughout our three year relationship. Towards the Day of Pickles, i had my first inpatient stay where i got help i desperately needed to keep myself safe. This happened to be about a week after my 23rd birthday, but about two and a half weeks before their 21st birthday.
Anyway, at that time i had just gotten out of the hospital and started a new job at Joanns Fabrics (i outlived that retail fucker and im proud of it). I had been unemployed for the previous year and a half because of the pandemic and so the retail job was really my saving grace to have some sort of income to buy gas and groceries. My parents let me live rent free with them in their basement but i spent a LOT of time essentially squatting at my ex's dorm because my situation with my parents was not great.
Now my ex was also being financially abused by their mom so they had a monthly "allowance" of 200$ (of their own money they made at their on campus job) and no access to their bank statements. So i spent a lot of my own money on gas and groceries for both of us, and anything we wanted to do for fun, like visit the city. Without an income, this was SUPER stressful for me and i spiraled pretty hard with feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. Supporting two people, even minimal living expenses, on an income of exactly 0$ is the WORST.
Anyway, i got out of the hospital and pretty much immediately went back to picking up as many shifts as i could at work because id been on staff for all of two weeks before hospitalization. Knowing retail, i was probably on the precipice of losing hours or being fired altogether.
My ex wanted me to take time off to celebrate their 21st birthday (they didnt celebrate my birthday that year) and travel to see their family and drink etc. I got scheduled for an inconvenient time. I would have to miss their birthday if i didnt find someone to cover. I managed to switch shifts with another coworker who was nice enough to let me have her morning shift, so i was able to at least travel separately and be a little late to dinner.
The night of their birthday my ex wanted to get drunk and so we went to the liquor store. Now im generally pretty picky about alcohol but if i get anything special i always get enough to share. Mysteriously, no one ever offers to share the expense or pay me back. So with all of 150$ in my account, i purchased enough alcohol for myself and the rest of the party, and a bottle of (cheap af) liquor for myself. I was broke af until my next paycheck and was pretty much planning on giving up meals and staying at home because the commute to work was shorter and meant less gas.
My ex picked out a jar of boozy pickles and asked if i would get it for them for their birthday. I should note that with all the stress i was under i had found a birthday present for them but hadnt actually placed the order (was waiting to get paid). I also didnt lie to them about this and had told them that i hadnt gotten their birthday present yet. They were upset by this and told me they felt like i didnt care about them, to which i snapped and raised my voice a little.
I gave them a bit of a reality check. I told them in no uncertain terms that i was under a lot of stress, from nearly killing myself to being flat broke with little to no help from my family other than a conditional roof over my head, ordering their birthday present wasnt super high on my list of things to do and that i knew what i was going to get them and that i intended to order it as soon as i had the money to do so. After years of the sole attention being focused on keeping them alive, i needed some support and acting like i didnt care completely ignored EVERYTHING i did to keep us both afloat.They cried and played the victim as they tended to do and i was too stressed to do anything but be angry.
So when they asked for the pickles i told them no. I have NOTHING left in my bank account, and anything that was in my account was already allocated for something else.
They told me i was being selfish for buying myself alcohol on THEIR birthday, not even getting them a present, yelling at them, and then refusing to buy the one thing they asked for, especially after i refused to take off work the day before to hang out with them and their family. In front of our friends.
I told them that i was purchasing the alcohol for the whole party, that the present had slipped my mind, and that they were accusing me of not caring about them when i snapped. Then i walked out.
My bff went outside to help me cool down and i told him what was going on and how stressed i was and he said that he agreed with me, it was childish to expect me to pay for everything with no help from anyone and then act like im unreasonable for having to put limits on what i can purchase.
My ex ended up getting so pissed by all of this they broke up with me two days later, saying that their birthday was the final straw for them after I'd been so codependent and relying on them too much to survive.
I think its all ridiculous given all of the stress factors i was dealing with at the time. I feel like we're all entitled to the occasional emotional outburst/bouts of forgetfulness when we're stressed. But my ex seems to think im a selfish asshole. We've been no contact for the last two years so this isnt like a pressing concern or anything but it does make me roll my eyes occasionally.
So tumblr, aita?
(Btw im also much more financially stable now that I'm fully and properly medicated and away from them.)
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talaok · 1 year ago
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Hey, I have this huge exam next week, it’s the biggest exam of my life so far and I’m stressed af. I consider myself a chill person but I’m feeling beyond anxious all the time and I have never felt this stressed in my life. It’s so hard to take care of myself rn like I don’t feel like eating but I have to because I’m nauseous and then I can’t find anything I’d like to eat and it makes me more anxious IT’S A VICIOUS CYCLE I SWEAR AND APPARENTLY I HAVE TO EAT EVERY FOUR HOURS EVERY DAY BC I’M A HUMAN??
anyway, sorry for oversharing. I was gonna ask if you could write sth with pedro taking care of stressed reader, making sure she eats and is hydrated, filing up her coffee, cuddling with her when she has crying sessions wiping her tears and telling her everything’s gonna be okay and he’s gonna be there for her with every step no matter what. I literally crave comfort right now, and I’d be so grateful if you could write something 🥹
I love how caring and kind you are with asks, thank you so so so much for being here. Love you 💕💕💕💕
pairing: Pedro pascal x reader
a/n: Im so so sorry love, im one hundred percent sure youll do great, but in the meantime, i hope this will make you feel a little bit better, love you💗💗 (this ask did skip the line bc if i posted it two weeks from now it wouldn't have made any sense)
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He didn't know how or when, but all of a sudden, all you did was study.
And at first, he didn't really think anything of it, you'd told him about the exam and about how important it was, so he understood, but what he didn't expect, was just how much you'd be studying.
You raised your head only to answer him, and even when you did, it was monosyllabic.
"Have you eaten anything?"
"no"
"did you drink any water today?"
"not really"
And no matter how many times he'd tell you how bad for you that was, the next time he asked, the answers were always the same. And that's exactly why by the second day, he had stopped asking and instead, started doing.
He had conceived a whole plan of attack.
For the days when he, unfortunately, had to go to work, he left two full water bottles and a glass on your desk, and an already cooked lunch in the fridge, so that all you needed to do was heat it up in the microwave.
But on the days when he didn't have to go to work, he took it upon himself to become your personal assistant, and your worst nightmare altogether.
No matter how much you complained, he forced you to take a break at least every two hours, he made sure you were drinking the water he poured into your glass, he made you coffee every time you asked, (always only after having reminded you that you didn't need more coffee but more sleep) and finally, he cooked or ordered all of your favorite foods in the hopes that it would make you feel more like eating (which never seemed to work).
Today, thankfully, he got to stay home, so for the thousand time, he walked into the studio to check in on you.
"hey there" he smiled, watching you half-heartedly wave at him before returning your full attention to your book "I brought you a snack," he said, placing the apple slices on your desk and making a soft laugh flee your mouth.
He had turned into a soccer mom, but god it felt good to hear you laugh again.
He got behind you to start gently massaging what he was sure must have been sore shoulders.
"how's it going?"
"bad" you grumbled, relaxing the tiniest bit at his touch
"I'm sorry" he murmured, leaning down to kiss the crown of your head "you wanna take a break?"
"It's not been two hours yet"
"I know, but I think it would be good for you" he explained "We could take a walk maybe"
You sighed, closing your eyes "I can't"
"sweetheart" he cooed, crouching down to be at your level and turning your chair towards him "you're gonna burn yourself out if you continue like this"
"I know but..." you glanced back at your notes "I can't fail this exam"
"and you're not gonna" he immediately reassured you
He watched something happen behind your eyes, 
"not if I keep taking breaks"
"baby-" he murmured, taking your hand in his and watching as your mouth curved downwards for the quickest moment 
"I just-I'm so anxious," you said, your voice breaking "I-I can't fail- I just can't"
"hey hey hey" he cooed, his eyes looking for yours "Sweetheart, it's ok"
And that was the moment you couldn't hold it anymore, all the stress and fear you'd been bottling up for days started spilling from your eyes.
"n-no it's not, I-I... I don't even know, I just..." you sobbed, and when you looked at him, he swore he heard his heart break " I feel like shit"
"sugar..." he murmured, wasting no time wrapping his arms around you "I'm so sorry baby," he spoke gently to your ear as his hands stroked your hair and back 
You hid your face in his chest as you cried all you had to cry.
"it's all gonna be alright sweetheart, I promise"
But at that, for some reason, you only started to cry harder.
"ok this is it, hold onto me"
And you had just the time to frown, before he had picked you up and walked out of the room and into the living room.
"w-what are you doing?"
"forcing you to take a break"
"I could have walked" A small smile appeared on your lips, and with it, a small wave of relief washed over Pedro's body.
"You've done enough today" he explained, sitting down on the couch with you, and in less than a moment, your whole body had clung to his.
Your left leg was draped over his, and your head was on his chest, as he held you close with both his arms.
"y/n, you're not gonna fail" he started gently "You're the smartest person I've ever met"
"That's not true" you muttered, your words muffled by his body
"yes it is" he insisted "And baby I promise you, that everything is gonna be alright" he swore, slowly running a hand through your hair "and that no matter what, I'm gonna be here for you, ok?"
It took a moment for you to respond, but after a few beats of silence, a muffled "ok" made its way to Pedro's ears.
"yeah?" he asked, again, encouraging you to meet his gaze.
"yeah" you sniffled, as you finally looked up
"Feeling better?"
"yes" you nodded "Thank you"
He tightened his hug, as he bent down, to ghost your mouth "I love you baby" he kissed you "Whatever you need, I'm always gonna be here for you"
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anglercrit · 2 months ago
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Alright. Pentleton has been (Unintended pun) finished the last image I sent was a Upscaled one I did myself before the leak ended up adding a better quality one. So here he is.
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Bonus is a Bio Sheet (I added a bit of my Mental Illness to him.) I removed the Jack The Ripper connotations and went with a fictional killer with no ties to the real world.
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Flags:
Transgender + Trans Masc
The Flag of Great Britain
AuDHD Flag
BiCurious + Pomosexual + Cupiosexual (All those kinda conflict but he's confused. Give the mans a break.)
For the screen readers who can't read:
Pentleton, Edward “Ed/Eddie” (born as Pentleton, Elizabeth “Eli”) | Sir Pentious / Saint Repentious
Eddie was born on March 4th 1807, London, England. To a high class family, growing up Pentleton always had a love for designing things such as varous inventions. Growing up Ed had always felt uncomfortable with his identity as he always felt comfortable as a male rather than a female, but never spoke out due to not knowing what his feelings were, he identified as Pentleton and not by his new perferred name in order to not attract any attention to himself. Pentleton suffered from an undiagnosed disability (It was later revealed it was a variant of Anxeity, Autism, ADHD and Biploar Scizoeffective.) spending most of his time in the safety of his family home he inherited he was a recluse preferring to actually make things that better suited his desires then basic human interaction. Pentleton was always unlucky. Despite being well off growing up, bad luck seemed to follow him everywhere, and as he grew into adulthood and the desire for basic human interaction dwindled. Pentleton always found comfort in doing hos own thing, and going to the library. One particular afternoon, (Circa. 1828, April 12th) Pentleton was apprehended on suspicion of murdering two young women in downtown London, despite the fact he was obviously not the killer and he was simply at the wrong place, at the wrong time. The police arrested him anyways, and with severe questioning, Pentleton folded, confessing to a crime he never committed out of duress. Because he “confessed” the police took that as guilt and sentenced him to public excution by hanging. While he was being held, Pentleton’s home was immediately searched and they found a prototype of a children’s toy called “Egg Boiz” the basis was they were essetionally a toy manufactured for the poor children of London to play with, for free. Most of Eddie’s blueprints were seized and are now being displayed in the “British Museum” to this day. Before Pentleton’s excution, there was rumors surfing around of his innocence as more murders were found when Pentleton was being held in the Stocks before he was sent to the hanging tree. No one really thought the killer was innocent mainly because of his “confession”. On exactly April, 22, 1828. 20 days after Pentleton’s conviction, Pentleton was executed in front of a bunch of high classes. His last words were allegedly: “I have a lot to say, but one of them is that humanity is willing to vindicate someone they viewed as dangerous, when the dangerous person is them all along. Part of being human is realizing everyone makes mistakes, well. You all made a huge one, by killing one snake, you freed another. And that’s a price that those poor girls will never understand. But hey, life goes on, I hope and pray that in the final events of my death that none of you make the same mistakes killing an innocent man.” After the hanging, Pentleton’s body was immediately burnt and the house he lived in is now a museum tour of some sorts, long after Pentleton’s death the killer struck again killing men and women over the course of the years. And ended up being found in the end. When Pentleton arrived to Heaven, Saint Peter didn’t gain him entry on the grounds of “Admitting to a murder” Pentleton’s unfair judgement made him damned for eternity not truly belonging in Hell.
Yup, I cooked and Im gonna go to bed. If people see this on my acc that means I posted it there too.
DAMN you did in fact cook- I just wanna say Saint Repentious is such a clever name i love it
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nvuy · 2 months ago
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HII i'm the anon from before who asked for writing advice !! thank you so much for answering omg (≧▽≦)
i'm not gonna start the tumblr blog idea 'til i actually feel confident in my writing (and already have a few things i can post), which i don't at the moment!
i really wanna write self-indulgent fics and if someone happens to relate then that's great!! thing is, my writing feels bland at the moment and rarely do i have any ideas to actually make into a fic (unlike right now. my brain's flooded with ideas all of a sudden..)
point is! i wanna give my writing a sort of descriptive/poetic feel and i know for sure a wide vocabulary isn't enough, even though it *is* a huge part of the style,, if that makes sense. how should i go about this? so sorry if i'm bothering u with all these writing questions!!!
enjoy the rest of your week nd stay cool <33
ur not bothering me at all, lovely. dont worry about it. i think i am the queen of self indulgent fics so there’s nothing to stress abt and i enjoy explaining how my stupid brain works.
description ;
a wide range of vocabulary isn’t necessary. it helps to know some special words and you’re welcome to incorporate them, but some of the best poetry ive read comes from its simplicity. a lot of people dont really want to read constant droning description; as much as i enjoy writing it myself, i hate authors like charles dickens with a passion. you can tell when a writer was being paid per word rather than how many times the book sells. and fuck his stupid ass christmas book.
a tip i can give you is to do what i do, which is to hand pick words depending on the scene.
i’ll use an example because i know that made zero sense: picture a very basic fairycore forest with pink plants and fireflies. this setting, from the description alone, should explain that this forest is a nice and small tucked away and pretty place. we add a stream that runs along the treeline. let’s describe the stream specifically. which sentence sounds better to you?
The white waters that part the soil flow down the centre of the earth, and divide the trees in two.
The clear waters that part the dirt splash down the middle of the path, and section the forest in two.
now, im hoping to the gods that you think the first one is better. the sentences are exactly the same in terms of definition, and the description depicts the same thing, but its the words used that make the first sentence softer, and therefore the setting seems a lot more peaceful by default.
if you use words with harder and rougher consonants throughout—i’m not telling you to avoid them—will make the sentence sound rougher, at least to me. harder sounds like ‘t’ and ‘k,’ as an example. words like ‘white’ i think, despite the hard ending, are still particularly softer, because the ‘wh’ sound at the beginning serves almost as a counterbalance. it’s why the word ‘clear’ sounds rougher; because it starts with a harder sound despite its softer ending.
it has nothing to do with magical sixteen letter words that nobody understands. learning new big words is cool and you’re welcome to use them, but if i see you writing: And the river is so beautiful, so stupendous, so marvelous, so loquacious… i will kill you with my bare hands.
something i also avoid is repeating the same words over and over again. using the stream as an example still, if you’re going to refer to it again and again, dont just use the word ‘stream.’ you sound like a parrot. change it up. look up synonyms if you’re not sure, or simply describe it also as ‘the water.’ the thesaurus is your best friend.
sometimes you can repeat words to emphasise them, or the passing of times. you can do this, but make sure it appears deliberate.
example:
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even in confiteor when i was forced to write the word ‘cock’ 5600 times, i broke it up. frankly because i dont really know what other word to use that doesn’t sound awkward or cringe, so in between verses, i tossed in exposition, internal musings, thoughts and feelings, etc, to change up the repeated use of the word.
i Hope… that made sense . .
dropping cliches ;
cliches are inherently bad things, but there’s a lot of things you can do to differentiate stereotypical phrases and such from the norm.
for example: a confession “i love you.”
BORINGGGGG. put it in the bin (im kidding but you can make it more interesting or heartfelt).
observe the typical: “im in love with you.”
now, in my opinion, it’s better than the former. it sounds more sincere. ‘i love you’ on its own could refer to many different types of love, but “im in love with you” is romance.
scrap the obvious and toss out the word ‘love:’ “i’ll never grow tired of your voice.”
now obviously poetic prose wont always work depending on the character doing the confessing. i could imagine someone like argenti prattling and waxing poetry for nine hours.
someone like boothill, however, in all of his inelegance, you can have more fun with.
observe again: “i trust you.”
“but wait nvuy that’s not a love confession.” it’s called subtly. and, if you’ve written it correctly, i shouldnt have to hear a ‘i love you’ to understand that the two people you’re writing about are in love. i should be able to understand that through interactions and exchanges beyond that. i based old habits around that; you didnt have to see the mc and scaramouche smooch to know that they were in love.
there’s so many ways to explain the feelings of romance without saying “[X] was in love with [Y].” UNLESS you use it for a comedic and abrupt effect that the character themselves is feeling, and not so much you as the narrator telling your audience that the character is in love.
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the romance you write can be slow and gentle or quick or hostile or muddied or confusing. make it so through words and actions. it’s all in the ‘show don’t tell.’
so if you want to combine my tips you can write your own gooey gross romantic self indulgent fics just like me and then force feed them to your friends YIPPEEEEEE
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ryuichirou · 4 months ago
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So i'm reading your yandere/hypnosis post and i get to Vil being utterly jealous enough to try on Rook; and it makes me think about his drive and the second place club lol (Leona, Jamil and Vil) like D: poor them they're always outranked by that ooonnee person! Can our boys catch a break? whether that person knows or not I always tend to feel bad--especially for Vil since i remember his inner speech in book 5 and the fact that his most trusted person ended up being such a big fan of the person who makes him feel like second best. wait i love rookvil i think i made myself sad LOL NOoo--aahh I rambled im sorry, i guess the main question i wanna ask is what do you think about those particular three always having to come second to their respective counterparts? I think your opinions and insight is so interesting that i'd like to know your thoughts on this! and you don't have to answer for all three characters if you dont wanna I was just curious on your thoughts! Anyways, have a good day and stay hydrated! it's hot this summer oof
Anon! Took some time to get back to you as well, sorry for the late reply. Summer is already over, but it’s still SO HOT…
Without diving into just how much I love the ending of book5 and the whole Rook-Vil-Neige thing (I feel like I talk about it all the time LOL)… It is interesting how these Vil, Jamil and Leona always get to be second best, isn’t it? But ironically, I don’t think I ever grouped them in my head based on this. Maybe it’s because of how different their situations are? But also now that I think about it…
Vil isn’t better than Neige, and he tries to be better by working hard.
Jamil is better than Kalim, but he can’t be better because of his status.
Leona may or may not be better than Falena in some ways, but he doesn’t even bother.
Ignoring the fact that this “better” is always subjective and in actuality things are more complex than that… and also trying not to sound like an armchair therapist that’s just telling anime boys “you should have done this you idiot”, but.
Jamil got the most development in that sense because this internal conflict is very straightforward, in fact, he was the easiest one to describe with these little sentences I just wrote. Jamil wants to stop pretending to be worse than he is, he wants to work hard and to show how great he is without being forced to get worse results than Kalim. He is only the second best because he consciously allows Kalim to be the best whenever he is given this choice. And he isn’t always given a choice: a lot of times the system decides for him, just like when Crowley chose Kalim to be the housewarden. Still, even in that situation, Jamil knows for a fact the shape, the density and the nature of this ceiling he can’t break, he’s been aware of it for his entire life. This is why it’s easy to pinpoint moments of Jamil’s growth: when he expresses how much he hates pretending to be worse than Kalim, when he says that he won’t hold back anymore, when he gets to dance and rap at VDC as a lead-vocalist and, ironically, when he gets scolded by Leona in ch6 (I have some issues with their sub-story, but still).
With Vil, the difficult part is to understand what exactly he understands as “beauty”: I mentioned it in a bunch of Vil-centric posts, but we’ve seen how in-canon he was described as too beautiful, therefore not as relatable as Neige. So this isn’t about beauty, and in a way I think this isn’t about Neige either. This is about Vil’s own feeling of self-worth and self-expression, and how people perceive him; Neige is just a very good point of reference, a good metric, especially considering that they always end up being compared to each other and that comparing numbers of followers is easy and seemingly objective (which is a cruel trap a lot of people fall for).
What I’m trying to say is that Vil isn’t fully and constantly aware of “the shape of this ceiling”, or rather why he can’t reach Neige; this is why we had that ending to his book. This isn’t solely about skill or quality, but those are the main things Vil focuses on.
And Leona… I am not sure about him, to be honest, because it boils down to one problem that I have with him: I am not sure what he wants.
It’s easy to compare him to Jamil because it seems like his issue lies in being frustrated with the system: he will never be the first because Falena is literally the first born son. But I don’t think it’s fair to compare a prince with a servant like that, because even though Leona wouldn’t be the king, he still has a lot of power and opportunities, and we’ve seen Falena valuing his strong points and expressing that he wants Leona to help him. One might even say that he invited Leona to be by his side, as a brother and an equal. But this isn’t what Leona wants in actuality, is it?
His “ceiling” seems to be obvious, but I guess his actual frustrations lie elsewhere, and those are kind of difficult to see because of how inconsistent he is. But maybe it’s just me being frustrated with his character again lol
I am replying so late because I really thought I would have some kind of conclusion about this whole thing, but it seems like I don’t lol Still, it was an interesting topic to think about.
Thank you for your ask! <3
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velvetvexations · 2 months ago
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I did not mean to sleep all day. Here all the non-kink asks in my inbox lol.
Does a little dance. People being weird about transmascs on here has messed up my self perception so bad im not actually sure of my own gender anymore, yayyyyy
Fuck that anon, if you're man that rules. Being a man is awesome. You don't need anyone else's opinion to affect who you are, there is no bad gender.
just saw someone acknowledge trans men are often lumped into female spaces due to bioessentialism but then turn around and say that thats proof that trans men arent oppressed. lol.
People act like being let into the Woman Club is the one and only goal of being trans and it's so fucking annoying.
Ngl I still don't understand why femboys are a "transmisogynistic caricature that can't be reclaimed by transmascs" according to some people. Do you have any insights on this because I genuinely can't understand, femboy sounds like gnc boy culture and in my own experience, maybe transfems before they come out occasionally identify as femboys. Idk is it like, someone with an outwardly feminine appearance being a guy? Because that's why I like calling myself a femboy.
Some people think femboy started as a transfem thing because they're idiots who don't know shit.
hey if catboy is ubiquitous and having nothing to do with crossdressing why did Jerma crossdress when someone drew him as a catboy???
Because catboys are allowed to do that lol. Taking one example of a crossdressing catboy to mean catboys infringe on transfem copyright is wild.
Hi thanks for letting me vent to you cause I am at work and can't properly process my emtions otherwise rn. I've been otherwise generally in a slightly emotionally fragile place and then I just got an awful review for my first actual order from a stranger on Etsy. And like I know logically that it's not the end of the world and I gave them exactly what they ordered and it's not my fault that they measured wrong or didn't take my advice and size up a little for fit etc etc but no one else will know that and I just got started selling craft stuff and it's just a hobby and it sucks that this person clearly expected something that wasn't what they paid for (my prices are low cause it's a hobby sorry I don't have super professional materials that would make my stuff cost double) but it's really fucking me up and I am trying not to like cry at work because of this and it's so stupid. This was just my first purchase online that wasn't from a friend and I was so excited and they hated it and didn't even send a message or anything about the length (that was exactly what they asked for by the way) not fitting before leaving a review. It just fucking sucks and I wish my brain didn't react to the most minor disappointments/shows of dislike with the I'm going to kill everyone in this room and then myself meme as first response Thanks for listening. It really helps to be able to vent this somewhere <3
I'm really sorry anon, that sounds so frustrating and hard to deal with. I love you so much. <3 I know you do great work and I hope it goes better next time.
Having NPD sucks, lmao, sorry for the rant ahead. I have to remind myself that the 'mark' on shinigami eyes doesn't actually mean anything, but it's hard sometimes because it's still a stain on my reputation. :( some people will see that and take it at face value, forever associating me with the filth that is transphobia, and I can't do anything about it. I appreciate the people who actually know what a transphobe is going out of their way to remove that mark, but it's a losing battle against a bunch of buffoons who think catgirls are transmisogynistic. sometimes it's really hard to pretend that it doesn't bother me at all, because it's highly insulting for me to be associated with the things I literally fight against. What an insult to my legacy and efforts to even bother to care about other people, you know? I don't HAVE to take time out of my day to do activism, I could just not bother to care at all, but I still try. I deserve praise, not this bullshit😭
I'll praise you! Thank you for fighting against transphobia. <3
All this catboy talk. Wanted to say hi as a catboy. Meow :3
Nya~!
My prediction for TRF discourse in 2025: closeted, non passing trans men shouldn't wear skirts or other traditional women's clothing (even if they don't want to and literally have no other choice) because they're MEN and men wearing women's clothes is obviously always transmisogynistic
All trans men are transmisogynistic because they grew up mocking transfems by wearing women's clothes.
some of this discourse is just so fucking wild i cant believe this is something people are taking so seriously. sipping my tea from the sidelines as a chubby catboy therian lmao
You have a cooler head than I.
iirc the "catgirls are transfem" thing started happening around the time Ferris got popular as a character because, if I'm correct, Ferris actually is transfem (coded?) and following that some people just decided The Aesthetique belonged exclusively to transfems now (also you're so so so so based for loving Schrödinger I remember first seeing him in like 2007 and wishing I looked exactly like him)
Schrodinger is my secret fifth blorbo. I'm obsessed with him. I think about him constantly. High five.
als catboys are only white passing in the way that people love to say anime characters are white lmao (aka cant conceive of the fact that anime characters are actually light skinned Japanese). not to say anime doesn't have a colorism problem but They Are Not White and its racist to say otherwise
lol yes exactly
I might be really stepping in it here, but tangential to catboy/catgirl discourse, I'm starting to get really uncomfortable with how the cutesy moe-blob yuri is treated as "trans lesbian culture" these days? as though none of it was ever straight guy fantasy shit? as though it's ideal representation instead of another vector of impossible beauty standards? idk, maybe I'm just being way too touchy. 😬
It's fine if something becomes emblematic of transfem culture but you just can't pretend something was always transfem when it blatantly wasn't lol
you got marked red on shinigami eyes and i havev no idea why
My smoke too tough, my swag too different, my bitch too bad.
juggalo here. we don't want them.
Devastating.
For what it's worth, the "cats transforming into people" thing is probably based on the bakeneko, yeah. The "bake" in "bakeneko" means "transforming", often with the implication of transforming into people (like the better known bakedanuki and bakegitsune). The popularization of cat-people in anime probably came from Neko-Musume from Gegege no Kitaro (the anime behind the "youkai boom" in modern Japanese culture), who is a half-bakeneko.
Fascinating.
(Dif anon) "leading one to wonder what transphobia they think trans men do face" 99.999% sure at this point we're at "trans men experience misgendering... maybe...?"
Well that doesn't count since everyone wants to be a girl, an idea that I believe has universal appeal because I'm a self-centered moron.
You're awesome <3
Thank you anon. <3
I didn't realize I was trans from yaoi but I did largely realize it from memes about traps and accidentally stumbling across largely transfem subreddits via a anime memes despite being transmasc so. Great amount of respect for our yaoi soldiers.
Hell yeah!
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Im so curious to know what your process is. Do you use math to map out the lengths of things from the image or do you just kinda feel it out?
at first i just eyeballed it, but for the past few 'builds' ive started putting more effort into matching the composition! its a lot of trial and error cause im an artist so i dont have a great way of exactly determining things, but this is how ive started recently:
i mostly slap the reference image on a canvas the same size/aspect ratio as my game window, then use the perspective ruler tool in Clip Studio Paint to trace the main structure of the room. i then deform grids (corresponding to the 20cm cubes that walls in hf2 are made of) onto the walls and floors to try and estimate the dimensions. i know that walls are usually around 2.5m tall and all doors in hf2 are 2m tall, so i make sure to match those to the grid and see how the rest lines up.
this process is very imprecise and small changes can make a huge difference cause i'm just extrapolating things. often i cant get the in-game grid to line up quite right with my "measurements" (because of lens distortion? rounding errors? the ruler tool doesn't guarantee perfect squares/cubes? still figuring it out) but i CAN use it to determine the height and approximate location in the room the picture was taken! from there i can start taking screenshots and overlaying them onto the reference image to trial-and-error my way to the closest FOV and to start making more precise adjustments to the size of the room and such
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for example: in the littleton north carolina uh. anime den. the grid on the floor wasn't quite right, and i ended up having to make the room 1 block narrower on both sides. the doorway between the two rooms and the diagonal wall also needed some adjusting!
in the end i cant get it to be perfect, but i really enjoy trying to match the basic structure of the room as much as i can!
(also to make sure i take screenshots from the same space, i place down a kitchen cabinet for inner corners to back myself into, and then place a tiny clothing hook on the wall in the location my cursor has to be. i temporarily delete the hook to take screenshots and then just ctrl+z it when i'm done lol)
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gamersagainstthemachine · 2 months ago
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i hear sh2 remake is good? i know nothin about silent hill. got my sister into RE and just beat dmc1 with her watching, hoping she starts to like 3 and 4 when i get there. but yeah, vido games! love em
ive been playing these games because i found the ps2 which i thought had died and i also frequent thrift stores and have been able to find these games cheap (not the silent hill games obviously collectors have scalped those) but my friends got me dmc1 because it "seemed like something id like" yeag. it cracks me up especially the devilman references. but it seems like these games are also just popular again with the general person?
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i havent played sh2 remake myself yet im busyyy and also tired of people rushing me to play things instead of doing it in my own pace. but ive been following along the release and it has some good things to it like environment details and even more endings. people have always been praising the little things in the writing and art direction which arent in the remake and they havent been replaced with better content so its lesser in this way. absolutely no way replace plauing the original with this one lol
i like games that are like interactive theatre with a great soundtrack and silent hill is often this. there is a lot of silent hill content, from installments that prove games are art to b movies that facilitate stupid cliches and it also encompasses other franchises like forbidden siren which i have played a bit of and team psyskallars fangames which are better silent hill games than some silent hill games and also hit closer for me because they take place in urban scandinavia. You know me its all been indie game supremacy because i didnt want triple A bullshit but ive made friends that have introduced me to the value of Big Gaming because its a part of them and because they are important to our culture and they are creative and its fun and there IS a lot of bullshit done in the name of marketability like blatant sexism and racism which i complained about the other day completely devalues the new dragon age for me because once i start thinking the authors are idiots with no other values than representing a power fantasy it really just feels like a waste of time to visit their work. Not that i dont want a power fantasy but i need it to address what matters to me especially the unattrative parts of life. Silent hill 2 is exactly this its what marias character is all about. i set my standard for video games when i first heard about silent hill 2 and similar games. the thing to like about it is that it is just so honest. its not really about people being horrible and ugly it makes a point about people being multifaceted and realistic and it is a sufferfest sure but its to drive a point home about ultimately love and gotta like media that examines the concept of love. they never try to censor themselves which i like because adults dont need content censored for themes they have specifically sought out depictions of. because it doesnt dumb down or glamourize it is entirely different from other commercial experiences which makes it weird that it is a popular franchise and video game with things like remakes coming out because you just cant treat it like any other consumable product its not anonymous or universal like that which lends itself to waifus and merch. but at the same time its also a video game made for an audience of adult gamers so it was made to create a fanbase around it. the best thing about being a silent hill fan is the gatekeeping and elitism it has resulted in and im serious because they arent games for everyone and it shouldnt be treated like they are. everything in moderation and all and the overexposure and bad retellings completely undermining or missing the sophisticated point is really prevalent. mr ito said it best https://x.com/adsk4/status/1495530138922283008 but seriously i have to even ask silent hill cosplayers and fanartists if theyve even played/seen the games and they often say no. a bit alienating. i think its fair to say the reputation overshadows the actual content for better or worse. it gets more exposure with the remake delightfully making history repeat itself like dis
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i think you would like silent hill games for their thoughtfulness i rec emulating 1-3 maybe 4 and maybe give siren a try even though its difficult. it is pure japanese horror and the face model scans are very haunting the plot is also more resident evil-scoped. but yeah very big franchises, tap out when you get tired.
personally i think any remake should be played as a sequel although triple a games are usually finished products when they come out so they dont really need more content? but people talk about remakes all the time so playing through an old game series like dmc made me think about it. DMC4 has a lot of things to like that were never realized or only realized in pachinko games because it wanted to be this big final fantasy hero adventure but had rushed development. playing it feels very stiff and vague and it should have been much longer story wise but it was padded out with nonsense gameplay. it "needs" a remake or prequel for sure! DMC2 was also never realized and i personally like its tone more and i think it could be remade to be the sequel that DMC never got.
DMC truly feels like the designers just did whatever they think is fun and throw it at you and thats good because media should be challenging and the gameplay and puzzles definitely felt like the game was treating you like an adult. I was really surprised when DMC turned out to be important to me. Because it wasnt really where id look for a game experience that is intelligent or subversive. But i was surprised when its an emotionally smart game. ill be honest what makes DMC work is the camp, which isnt necessarily profitable or what a straight audience of noncreatives want so i think thats why it kinda has been worked out since DMC1. but dmc1 güde. i dont remember the last time i noticed i was smiling while playing a game my genuine and& honest reaction
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i thought dmc was final fantasy for the longest time which is why i got pleasantly surprised by the dmc1 cutscenes you know the ones when they happened ahahah. that game is just entertaining i hope you and your sister had fun with it too! i have played all of the dmc games now except for the reboot which i am very interested in playing because even though its a bad dmc game from what i have seen it looks like an excellent devilman game it seems their train of thought was very similar to crybaby. dmc4 was almost my least favorite moreso than 2 but i can imagine DMC4 is very good if youre a catholic teenager. dmc5 is worth playing the other games for, its like the details and continuity keep hitting you and V is goth incarnate he is the character ever. his official manga is that good and it has no official english release at all. fucked. the dmc1 anime is fun its very 2008 anime. The franchise overall feels like it keeps giving.but it also feels like its thinning out by relying too much on happy reactions in the reader like jokes. it really hurts vergils character the most i think.
i was so excited to play 4 more games like dmc1 but they are very different which also has its merits i guess but i miss the darker stuff and difficulty. dmc5 gives you gold orbs just for starting the game... the novels can def be skipped for fanwritten lore dumps
its pretty common for people to say that dmc is for kids but i think its exactly for people that have seen all the tropes genres and series it draws on before and want a fresh spin on them that doesnt take itself seriously when it comes to plot but does handle emotional maturity carefully. its different from resident evil in this way right? when they arent implementing internet discourse, then franchises are increasingly asking us to take their stories seriously marvel is prime example of this and i just cant bring myself to gaf so i lov dmc way more than resident evil. i also got into that franchise by chance because i won a copy of re8 village and some of my ps4 games were stolen so i needed things to play. im peeved by the shallowness of the series but they do haunted house experiences SO well. i get a bit scareds. RE engine is also insaaane they really spend so much money on rendering every single wrinkle on dantes ass in leather and dynamic wetness its excellent to play with
the thing about these games is that you can really help getting an attachment to them after playing because they are really effective. i understand the dedicated audiences. I hope you take your time with them and its so awesome to bring somebody else along for the ride. it can be challenging to visit old media that has its installments in perspective to eachother because old players view them retrospectively. but there is also some cool historical fan content to find. and its one of those beloved franchises once you know it you just remember seeing it everywhere. i think my friend had pictures of trish and nevan on her computer when we were like 9 and had no idea what it was from but our favorite activity was of course Google Images
so ya i wrote much but that was all i wanted to say. youll have to list the replies in numbered order or something if you want to add anything XD
clown lady 4 u V have a wonderful day
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