#im legitimately upset about this
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can anyone who even remotely gives a shit about letterboxd and/or using/seeing custom posters please upvote my suggestion on their feedback forum?
apparently tmdb (where letterboxd hosts their posters from) is cracking down on "fan art" which even includes posters that are simply changed to black and white or have a different text color, even if everything else is the same.
i, and a lot of other people, put a lot of time and effort in to customizing our lists. this is why i pay to be a patron on letterboxd. unless they decide to host somewhere else or make it so you can upload a custom poster right to letterboxd, i literally don't see a point in paying for it anymore.
pictures for example (and follow me here if you want to):
literally none of these posters are the originals. every single one is custom. i didn't make all of them, but i have made well over 300 and have spent hours doing so. i understand that this might not be important to everyone, but like. can i please have a little joy in my life?
anyway, moral of the story: please upvote my suggestion here.
#letterboxd#ramblings#im legitimately upset about this#tmdb literally suspended my account even though i had no idea i was doing a Bad Thing#like i guess i get not allowing fanmade works but how does making a poster#black and white and pink constitute fanart??#im not changing any of the details or uploading a totally different poster#IM MAD OKAY
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Please take my low effort shitpost of our two Aston flopboys
Basically:
#credits to c for the 'ill bite you'#truly my magnum opus what can i say#idk i wanna draw something legit for the 'you threw me to the lions' quote#but like this idea haunted me LMAO#just because it is truly vettonso weekend *for me*(and all the other dedicated vettonso lovers)#im not too legitimately upset abt nando bcs im pretty happy for osc but like also his radios made me SADDDDDDD#this was the first time he really sounded legit upset and flustered :(#AND HE DIDNT GET THE KISS TROPHY UGHHHHHHH#so as c and i were talking about: seb is his kissy trophy 🥰#god i really hope you dont mind all the vettonso posting this wknd dhjfkg its a lot of fun for me!#also i hate that i have the compulsion to listen to early 2010s hits whenever i draw vettonso LMAO#gets me into thr mood yknow#fernando should listen to firework by katy perry i think it could fix him#2023 japanese gp#vettonso#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#f1 fanart#catie.art.
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Random thoughts about my weight
Im a heavier gal. (Full disclosure about 240lb currently) I am working on getting more vegetables and exercise in my life, but for the foreseeable future Im still gonna be a heavier gal.
Im gonna look heavy no matter what i wear.
So im gonna wear what i like. Hiding my arms doesn't make them look thinner
This is something ive lived by for the past few years and honestly, while its hard at first to fight the instinct to hide my arms or legs or whatever, once you stop it feels so much better.
Also i still have the instinct to explain why im heavy, like that makes a difference if ive had health issues or some "reasonable explination" makes it more excusable to be the weight i am when in reality no one should ever have to explain themselves for something like that. Regardless of the reason im fat, I deserve basic human respect without excuses.
Which brings me to the fat positivity thing. To me it's never been about wanting to be fat or fat being healthy or unhealthy or whatever. Its about it doesnt matter if you're healthy or not you still deserve to be treated well and with dignity.
I remember my friends laughing at a girl who rode her bike in our neighborhood all the time because "youd think shed be skinnier with all that biking" which is just utter nonsense. I didnt speak up then when i should have but i still think about it often. The girl wasnt even big. I have no idea what their problem was.
But how do you expect someone to even get exercise when theyre larger when you laugh at them when they try? Make it make sense it doesn't
Just like idk
Let people live? And leave them alone? Treat people with basic respect?
I dont generally feel any particular WAY about my weight, its just there, but sometimes i do concider it and get mad on my blubber belly's behalf.
#ill delete this later most likely#but felt compelled to talk about it today#not sure why#im legitimately not upset that im fat#just felt like talking about it
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Played some of the new Sims 4 expansion today before something happened and the game became completely unplayable (stuck on loading screen, been troubleshooting all night and nothing works) have the screenshots I took before EA took my money and ran. guess I'm not allowed to relax- back to dolls and drawing!
#I wanted to make current Corpse Lily but I couldnt get an elder sim to look how I wanted. no hair was right either#the expansion was fun while it lasted#i really hope a patch comes down or a fresh install helps me bc im legitimately very upset about this :/#sad#hbg#not dolls#strangetext
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dragon age fans have an uncanny ability and endless drive to make themselves unhappy and demoralized. every bit of veilguard information we've gotten so far has been encouraging and what you react with is "but what if the things they haven't talked about yet are bad :("
please get well and consider how little benefit there would be to a marketing plan that starts with the best possible news and tapers off into irrelevant or disappointing aspects instead of the other way around
#im begging you Begging you to stop producing things to be upset about based on literal speculation#its one thing to be concerned abt things that are already in the world or been hinted at but so many of you straight up conjure new shit 😭#xavi.txt#this could be considered vagueblogging but unfortunately theres too much that this applies to lmfao#and in case my 2nd tag wasnt clear this is not about legitimate grievances w the world building its abt dread over things with zero info
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I really love giving gifts to people I wish I knew my mutuals irl so I could send them little trinkets :((
#legitimately upset about this btw#its cruel that i cant give useless shiny objects to all my friends#im just a lonely crow in a world not built for crows 😔
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Using my brain like a metal detector to figure out what the FUCK it wants to do
#*shakes brain* what do you want??? food isnt working acnh isnt working weaving isnt working#im gonna fucking riot#im understimulated but just listening to a video feels OVERstimulating#i get bored & tired two minutes after starting a thing#but i want to do SOMETHING#i was in bed almost all day yesterday b/c i couldnt get myself to do anything else for more than. like. an hour at a time#or maybe less (it felt like less anyway)#i do NOT want to do that again#if my new meds dont do anything to help istg (im not gonna do anything im just gonna be upset)#depressions a bitch and i hate it!!!#im tired but i got a good amount of sleep the past few nights so its not from that??? i know its the Mental Illness but. still#i do NOT want to just take a NAP all DAY i want to DO things when im OFF from WORK#is this what it was like pre-meds??? b/c if so HOW#i legitimately dont remember#personal#jay rambles#mental health cw#depression cw#im. so fucking tired of this shit if the new meds do the thing where it makes things worse for the first few weeks#im still not gonna do anything im just gonna be upset about it. and there's a real chance i wont be able to work full hours#which i cant afford atm#i MADE SURE i had enough food for lung and i havent had half of it b/c i started and my brain went “mm no you're full actually”#(i very distinctly am NOT full. but now it has a bad Mouth Feel and im going insane)#(gonna try knitting next to see if that works)#food mention
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i hate feeling ashamed.
#i think i hate being ace. am i? i think im desperate not to be.#i hate people who act superior to others for no fucking reason.#just because you do feel an emotional reaction to a bully/troll/douchebag doesnt make you naive or insignificant or weak.#it's not some “gotcha!” moment that you do care about what words people use. that you feel upset. even if you act irrationally.#feelings ARE irrational. and that's okay. it does not make you weak.#basically i cant believe i stumbled across a borderline acephobic troll on a viral tumblr post in the year of our lord 2024.#i think it legitimately triggered me. which sucks real fucking bad. idk if it's fair to call this “trauma” but i think you can still have#triggers even if you're not.#sometimes certain things really revert me to a past mental state and make me feel trapped and ashamed and fearful. and that sucks!#but what im feeling IS real. it IS painful even if it's just a dick online. im not weak for having an intense emotional reaction to somethi#that makes me feel emotionally unsafe.#god i hate how therapy speak has become so common that now it becomes misused/overused all the time#and thus it's now an easy dig to just make fun of someone for using any kind of language they learned in therapy.#legitimately what kind of douchebag does that.#some people are truly unpleasant and sickening and it really really sucks that you cant just. not ever interact with unpleasant and sickeni#people. but that's reality for you.#i feel better now. jesus christ that was awful.#mine
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HERE I WAS. FOOLISHLY LULLED INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY BY TALK OF CUTE COWS AND A BURNING FIREPLACE
#fucking hell this show#im gonna have an aneurysm soon#STATEMENT OF JONAH MAGNUS??????#im throwing up#jon sounded so happy starting the 1992 statement#and then legitimately tortured for jonah's#christ#i get shivers every time jon is directly adressed in a statement#i love “dread powers” as terminology#gertrude never caring to organize and collect statements#immediately contrasting with jon complaining about the mess of the archive#the show starts on the premise of jon ORGANIZING the archive#FUCKKKK thats so good#ALL the powers at once???????#that sounds. bad.#OH#OHODHSGKHJ FINALLY#THE ARCHIVIST TITLE MISNOMER BEING ADRESSED#FUUCKVLJDFHKJKKKM THIS IS SO GOOD#“you are a living chronicle of terror” DUDE#again with the fucking absurdly good writing#this is INSANE#“a little wager about martin” that is SO SO SO upsetting#what the fuck#hello???#CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME#fizz listens to tma#ep 160
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WAIT. i just remembered i have a whole doctor who fanfic archive bookmarked. i wonder if its still up.
#i have a few old archives bookmarked because im fascinated by older fandom websites#i got legitimately upset about the k/s archive closing its doors you have no idea. but i think the doctor who one might still be up?#i think its called. a teaspoon and an open mind. yeah thats the one.#dw lb
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I wish AI images didn't make me so intensely upset. Just the existence of them bothers me a lot, because it's just clutter without meaning or emotion or any genuineness. But recently something happened that made me very upset, and I feel so irrational saying this, but it really gave me this sick, heart-wrenching feeling, and I wish it would stop. My mom was looking through Facebook, and showed me this image of birds that to me was so obviously AI. But she wasn't 100% sure it was fake, only telling me after I had told her it was definitely AI, that she had been a bit unsure about it.
I hate how intense my feelings are about it, bcs it made me want to irrationally almost infantalize her without meaning to. It just made me overwhelmingly sad that this is state of things. That people are being fed this imitation, this trash, and aren't familiar enough to recognize it all the time. Every time I think about it, it hurts my chest.
#im in a unrelated hyper emotional state at the moment#so i think thats obviously a factor as to why this is getting to me so much#BUT IT REALLY DOES MAKE ME SO INTENSELY UPSET#and i feel bad bcs i was definitely infantalizing her without meaning to#i didnt want to make her feel bad but god it just makes me so upset#this is the future of things????#she just wanted to see cute animals pics :(#and an account posing as a legitimate photography account posts that fucking trash#it makes me so upset#sorry im probably being really over dramatic and irrational about this#but ir really does make my chest hurt every time i think about it and i wish it would stop#it just makes me so depressed with the state of the internet#like when i try to look up simple reference pictures#and a lot of the search result is blatantly obvious AI trash#and it makes me intensely sad that there's people out there that cant tell the difference as well#and are being fed trash and lies. it hurts so bad to me#i wish this would pass soon#i mean im still going to be upset about the state of things. but I'd like to stop feeling this wounded#needed to write this and put it out there in hopes it will absolve the weird sick feeling i have about it#catie.rambling.txt
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so i had heard that some of the newer releases of Monster High dolls were being made with a different type of hair fiber and that a lot of people were upset about this.
i did not, until last night, realize exactly how bad it is.
i had some of the original MH dolls as a kid, but i wasnt able to tap into the collecting hobby until i had become an adult, years after my old toys had already been donated (a tragedy, but not really the point) and before the new reboot was launched. so my doll collecting hobby really began with Rainbow High. i loved that they came with a second outfit, they had long, soft, styleable hair, and they had substance to their bodies! unlike barbie dolls, RH has curves and weight in your hand when you hold them. i thought that was awesome.
anyway. i knew that RH didnt use the saran hair that barbie often used, and that mattel used for MH back in the day and in the reboot. being new to the concept of different types of hair, it didnt matter much to me. i could see the pros and cons of both saran and the type of hair RH used.
now, recently, i tried to buy Skulltimate Secrets Draculaura for my roommate for their birthday, and amazon let me wait a whole month for them to ship it before saying, just kidding, we dont have it, heres your money back. RUDE AS HELL!
well fine. now the SS Fearidescent is out, so ill just get them that one instead. i see in the reviews that her hair type is different, they voice disappointment but ultimately shes still cute and theres not a lot that we, as consumers, can do about it except maybe complain.
and im thinking, whatever, im used to RH hair anyway, and yeah its more staticky but its still pretty soft, so how bad could it be?
well, she came in the mail yesterday, and we were pretty disappointed at just how bad it could be.
ive come to realize that RH hair is not made of polypropylene, the new material theyre giving MH as of this line (ive heard that theyve given g3 clawdeen this type of hair before, which is a whole other can of worms that isnt one of the points of this post), but for rainbow high they generally use Nylon (correct me if im wrong) which is still cheaper and less authentic to real hair than saran, but is still generally pretty soft.
ive never had a doll with pin straight hair (and almost no styling product) feel this BAD in my hands. its coarse, lightweight, and easy to frizz, just from a quick finger comb. i soaked her in hot water and conditioner, and shes only a little bit softer.
i had my partner, who, besides being supportive of my hobbies and listening to me talk about it, knows next to nothing about the differences between types of dolls, feel the difference between the first g3 Drac, RH Karma Nichols, and Fearidescent Drac. on a few quick comparative touches, they noted that saran feels the most like real hair, while RH nylon feels kinda soft but not quite as nice. then they touched new Drac, and all they said was, "ah. depression."
i didnt have my hopes up at all but my expectations were still shattered. i legitimately didnt realize it was this bad. the downgrade is Immense. ive seen people rag on RH hair, and this is WORSE. i seriously cant believe how much worse it is. i didn't think mattel would make a $30 Beloved Brand Name doll with all those accessories and give her DOLLAR STORE KNOCKOFF HAIR, but i guess thats on me for holding a corporation to any sort of production standard in 2023 🙃
anyway, all this is to say, hair fiber snobs, im so sorry and i get it now. this shit sucks.
#my only hope is that MAYBE mattel will see everyone complaining about it and realize they can't keep getting away with it#but people are obviously buying them anyway so who knows#if the monster ball line has poly hair im gonna be so fuckin mad legitimately#why would they do us like this#the SS drac i wanted originally has saran hair#but EVERYONE wants her so she's been at scalper prices on amazon CONSTANTLY and i cant find her at target at all#if this shit continues ima have to go back to my Discount at walmart. fuck.#im not shelling out $30 for a doll they cut corners on.#playing with their hair is half the reason i like having dolls#the other half is the clothes#but petting their hair is a sensory stim for me and they literally ruined it#the straight haired RH dolls are my favorites because theyre so silky#even if they do get staticky if i brush them too much. at least the fibers are smooth#i didnt realize id be so upset about this but i also didnt realize it would be this fucking bad#anyway.#monster high#rainbow high#dolls#mh#rh#monster high skulltimate secrets#monster high fearidescent#draculaura#monster high draculaura#doll collector#📝
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some of you may remember that post i made about a new kind of bot comment--a request to upload my fic to youtube. like a podfic, but read by a crap ai with an ai thumbnail and a clickbait-y title. i appreciated the getting-permission bit, but was otherwise not a fan.
yesterday i was alerted by a different, much kinder bot that a very similar content farm stole my fic for the exact same kind of youtube video:
[description in alt text]
i checked it out, and it was indeed true. according to the article linked in that comment, this team uses a bot to read transcripts of thousands of videos and compare them to ao3's public database, then manually confirms any videos that the bot flags. it only works for ao3 fics, unfortunately, since there isn't the same kind of database for ff.net or wattpad.
i honestly care a lot less about the ~thievery~ (my feelings on copyright are complex, moreso in the fandom realm) and more offended by the lack of courtesy or integrity or any kind of care for the work. shame. they even LIED in the video description and said they have author permission! the gall. disappointed but not surprised. also, according to the linked spreadsheet, this channel was monetised, which is just ugly.
i've submitted a DMCA complaint form as suggested, which feels a bit weird, but whatever gets the job done. we'll see if it pans out.
in the meantime, the fic in question is here, if you want to check it out
(side note: this is part of my bnha bdsm au, and is a story about sexual assault and recovery with a hefty dose of dealing with constant surveillance and the way the media twists a narrative and the stress of trying to have a functional relationship amidst both those things, so it's....very funny to me that this one specifically was stolen to put alongside videos like "what if deku had an animal quirk" and "what if deku was a rockstar")
also we should all laugh at the video. look at this shit
i'm offended, tbh. anyone who has read the fic should know why but also just, like, in general. it makes no sense for the story! i know i shouldn't be upset over the lack of integrity a content farm youtube channel has, but i am! i am upset! put in some goddamn effort, the disrespect, for real.
if you are so inclined, you can read more about the project that is working to get these videos taken down and even join them here. the google sheet is not being publicly updated anymore (it appears they are working on a new system that hasn't been fully implemented yet), but if you want to check for your own fics that may have been caught pre-april 3rd, look here.
additionally, this is a good time to point out that podfics (fanfic audiobooks) are a very valuable form of fan creation and this could be your sign to get into it! i'm not a podficcer myself (yet; who knows), but there are plenty of guides here on tumblr and on ao3 to help you get started.
#bird noises#wren wrambles#ao3#fanfiction#ai#honestly im like. not even upset genuinely about the stealing im just soooo pissed about how lazy and automated and disingenuous it is#like i said in my first post the ai doesnt even bother me most#a channel like this with actual care put into it could be legitimately useful given how many people like audiobooks and how few podficcers#there are in the community#its just the total lack of interest/care/respect like. eugh
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back from the barbie movie and I certainly have Thoughts on what the movie was doing but overall I do think it's worth seeing! it's fun
#☢️.txt#spoilers in tags!#i think what they did with ken is actually really fascinating and while i do get why the movie doesnt focus on his motivations#or the fantasy politics of barbieland#i AM personally interested in them#like his frustration is coming from a legitimate place and the movie does acknowledge that both barbie (margot) and the barbies overall were#Not In The Right and its not the actual solution to the issue of feminism#in the same way that the movie acknowledged that barbie didnt solve feminism and in many cases ended up playing into#the very ideas that prevent women from pursuing the jobs barbie is often shown in#im sure ppl will critique the movie for not going far enough but like. i dont think their point was to make a massive statement?#so much as it was to make a campy blockbuster that gently acknowledges the ways people can so often feel left out#its not the feminist piece of a generation so much as it is a love letter to barbie that acknowledges how shes#an inherently flawed consumerist brand. but one thats deeply cherished by generations and has left a massive pink stamp on our culture#(its probably worth noting that i have generally positive memories of barbie)#(despite being a weird fat kid i never personally felt alienated by barbie and my memories are extremely fond)#(i didnt like baby dolls bc. i never have liked kids but barbie was a fantasy in sparkly dresses)#(she was married to my dinosaur toys. ive always known what im about yes)#my favorite barbies were swan lake a halloween witch barbie and a halloween ghost barbie#(also idk is this an autistic thing for me to only learn most young girls compared their bodies to barbie at like 14?)#(like it just never dawned on me to compare my looks to a toy tbqh. i was more upset by the actual lack of clothing in my size)
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Friendly reminder: If I catch you post/ reblog AI art and follow me I'll throw you into the pits of hell.
I would rather have 1000 p0rnbots follow me than any of you leeches.
#every da yi see people defending this shit and it upsets me#ai art in its current form is not ethical nor legal#laws just lag behind when it comes to internet stuff#and even then#you see your artists having legitimate complains about it and all you do is rub their explotation into their face#disgusting#typos bcs im tired idc
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hey wait i just remembered the incident
#timothy's txts.#remember the one person who got sooooo heated about me bringing something up#because it wasnt hurting anybody (<- their words)#and i was like 🧍🏻 im bringing this up BECAUSE MULTIPLE of my mutuals clearly stated boundaries#so that they wouldnt be super uncomfortable or legitimately triggered#and this person ignored that#tw emoji#like the rest of the situation whatever im not about that rn#but god. they were so upset i said anything and i was like. buddy. youre lying . to me. About Me.
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