#im gonna have an aneurysm soon
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HERE I WAS. FOOLISHLY LULLED INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY BY TALK OF CUTE COWS AND A BURNING FIREPLACE
#fucking hell this show#im gonna have an aneurysm soon#STATEMENT OF JONAH MAGNUS??????#im throwing up#jon sounded so happy starting the 1992 statement#and then legitimately tortured for jonah's#christ#i get shivers every time jon is directly adressed in a statement#i love “dread powers” as terminology#gertrude never caring to organize and collect statements#immediately contrasting with jon complaining about the mess of the archive#the show starts on the premise of jon ORGANIZING the archive#FUCKKKK thats so good#ALL the powers at once???????#that sounds. bad.#OH#OHODHSGKHJ FINALLY#THE ARCHIVIST TITLE MISNOMER BEING ADRESSED#FUUCKVLJDFHKJKKKM THIS IS SO GOOD#“you are a living chronicle of terror” DUDE#again with the fucking absurdly good writing#this is INSANE#“a little wager about martin” that is SO SO SO upsetting#what the fuck#hello???#CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME#fizz listens to tma#ep 160
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I really wish people would be straight up about what they mean sometimes. When you ask me why I did something and I explain why I did it don't come back at me with "excuses"!!! What the fuck are you talking about, excuses? You ASKED I am now TELLING YOU WHY IT HAPPENED why are you mad at ME for telling you??? When you asked?????
#i dont get it i dont get it im gonna SCREAM#i had an Interaction this week and i had a dream about it last night because its bugging me so much#is this autism? because i feel like theres a whole Social Thing here i just dont fucking understand#i never have!!!!! my parents would do the same thing!!!!!#“why did you do x???? what were you thinking???” =#“oh i did this because y happened and then i felt z so it was only logical to do X. i thought it was the right way to respond?”#THEN THEY GET MAD AT ME FOR ONLY GIVING EXCUSES????????#like im not excusing anything im. explainging. whats . going on???#am i having an aneurysm????????#anyways as SOON as someone pulls the “excuses” thing even JOKINGLY i get teary bc like ????#idk it feels like what im saying and doing is being wildly misinterpreted#and i dont know how to fix it#bc then as soon as im emotional and confused im told im being manipulative for having that reaction ????#(this is in reference to like. my mom. bc for some reason anyone having emotions about shit is them explicitly trying to manipulate and#control her)#idk idk idk im so tired#personal#okay to reblog#if you understand this and have the spoons to explain it. i would appreciate. i feel really fucking stupid rn and a genuine understanding of#the situation would be. nice
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random Dallas Winston hc pt2
me when i remember that dallas winston is a teenage boy.... shivers.....
warnings: none..... i think
Whenever him and the gang are by are body of water (lake, pool, river) he will make it his life's mission to try and drown the person closest to him
In school, when he has to read a sentence with the word organism in it, he will purposely say orgasam
He will have a fucking aneurysm if he has to do work with his assigned partner/group
"im not doin shit thats all you 😒😒"
Whenever ponyboy talks back to darry, he will try so hard not to laugh or instigate. When darry notices he stops giggling and looks around nonchalantly as if he didnt see a thing happen
drenches himself in cologne
he is a try hard in gym (when its a sport he actually fucks with or if he shows up to school)
"its not that fucking hard to throw the ball jesus christ.... yknow what just give it to me 😒😡"
Really likes going on joy rides with his friends/gf preferably at night time!!!!!!!!!!! its one of his favorite things to do
When sylvia first cheated on him, he stared at the ceiling in his room thinking about everything wrong he has ever done in his life until he got mad and went to go look for girls to rizz up
one of his favorite songs is dazed and confused by led zeppelin
thinks taking naps are for "wimps" but the second he lies down literally anywhere he is out like a light 😭 hes gonna deny it (for some reason) and say he just got so bored he had to close his eye and imagine something exciting happening
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relationship hc coming soon..!!! lwk might double post and post it TODAY!!! when im out of school though ofc so you will have to wait
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BLUE IS THE COLOR (mason mount x reader)
summary : in which y/n and mason argue about their newborn babys favorite football team
face claim : not needed
notes : im a sucker for dad fics and as of right now mason is my no1 pookie 😝 also imagine hes still in chelsea cause i refuse to support any other london team #loyal (god i miss prime chelsea). ALSO.. if u dont support barcelona or chelsea .. idk i dont think youll like this fic so mby pretend its ur teams xxx except for Madrid 😊 (i dont hate madridistas but yk im a culer soooooo) im also now seeing that the font is apparently purple but im slightly colorblind so js ignore that thanks xx
pairings : mason mount x reader (dad!mason mount)
"NO SHOT, my baby is NOT supporting Barcelona" The Chelsea midfielder argued. You and Mason have been together for quite some time already (five years to be exact) and you've recently welcomed your firstborn son, Nicolas Mount into the world.
You were born into a family full of FC Barcelona fans, so naturally, you became one aswell. Even after meeting your boyfriend, a Chelsea player, he couldn't change your mind. Thankfully, these two teams are in different leagues so you don't have to worry about having an aneurysm everytime these two played eachother (except for the champions league and thats also just a maybe)
This was a conversation the two of you have had multiple times, even before your baby was born. It was always shrugged off but now, that your son is here. It was time to decide.
"How about everytime Barcelona plays, he wears their jersey but any other time it's your jersey?"
"I'd look unloyal and like im joining Barcelona" (ironic isn't it) the brown haired man laughs.
You playfully roll your eyes at Mason's remark, knowing that this debate wasn't going to end anytime soon.
"Oh come on, Mason. It's just a jersey, it doesn't determine his loyalty at this age, just the fact that he's not a Madrid fan"
"But it's the principle, Y/N. We can't have our little boy supporting a rival team right from the start," Mason chuckles, ruffling Nicolas' tiny hair as he sleeps peacefully in his crib.
You lean in closer, a mischievous glint in your eyes. "Fine, how about this? We let him decide when he's old enough. Until then, we can take turns dressing him up in each team's gear. That way, he'll grow up knowing both teams and make his own choice."
Mason considers your proposal for a moment, a smile forming on his face. "Alright, deal. But I'm warning you, I'll be teaching him all the Chelsea chants in the meantime," he jokes, kissing your forehead.
"Okay but he has Catalan blood? He's gonna be a Culer by default"
"I'm pretty sure he's gonna be sick of both teams and become a Juventus fan by the time he can decide" The man jokes while looking at his son.
"Still better than Madrid"
yapfest part two, i put out a poll and yall said i should do this but idk if its good 😭 anyways hope you enjoyed
#mason mount x reader#mason mount#mason mount imagine#dad!mason mount#mason mount fluff#mason mount x y/n#mason mount fanfic#mason mount blurb#mason mount scenarios#football fic#mm19#formula 1#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#wroetovic#dad fic#mom!reader#footballers x reader#fc barcelona x reader#yapfest#certified yapper#yapping
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neil fun facts!! yahhu.
- my biggest fears are vomit, hair splinters, and spiders.
- i get unsettled by things really easily but ill still be invested. perfect example is the lost song “everyone knows that/ulterior motives”. it makes me so scared but im invested as fuck
- i love dogs. my favorite breeds are the german shepherd and the goldendoodle and italian greyhound (like jenna marbles)
- i fucking LOVE fnaf. however i have never finished a full game as ill tweak genuienly
- i am a south park fan and im gonna binge the series soon considering i have nothing better to do
- despite not being a fan of blink 182 (host is, im not) my favorite song from them is a bonus track. yeah.
- i read warrior cats. im never beating the gay allegations at this rate!
- my favorite breakfast item is bacon or donuts
- i am very passionate about “punks” on tiktok despite not really listening to much punk
- im also terrified of needles. of any kind, sewing, medical, anything. i hate needles
- despite being a nintendo fan, ive never been the biggest fan of pokemon (at least newer pokemon. i fw pokemon blue and stuff)
- i love my gameboy if i had a kid itd be my pet dog and gameboy
- i love nirvana. my favorite songs are aneurysm, i hate myself and want to die, and milk it
- i wear strictly jeans for bottoms. fuck sweatpants fuck anything else
- i LOVE LOVE LOVE aqua teen hunger force
thats it.. i think. umm yeah. yeah!
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watching for herbie (spoilers) - part 1
im a big musical fan but ive never seen this one. i love rocky horror and les mis but i dont know if ive every heard of gypsy. hmm well lets see
holy shit hes baby
his american accent is funny and hes kinda blessed
HES SO TALL WHAT THE FUCK
HES BABY
HES SITTING DOWN AND SHES AS TALL AS HIM WHAT THE FUCK
sir is unhinged
herbie looks like hes about to cry its okay baby you can have and egg roll soon too i hope
update: herbie does not like chinese food
*mike wazowski voice* using mainly spoons
herbie is a simple man he only wants 2 things;
a wet dick
a ring on his finger
hes in so much pain with this woman pls help him (he has stomach ulcers pls this man needs a medic)
the song is literally cALLED 'YOULL NEVER GET AWAY FROM ME' DUDE THATS FUCKED UP PLEASE STOP TORTURING THIS MAN
HERBIE HOW MANY TIMES HAS SHE SAID SHES GOING TO MARRY YOU SHE CANT KEEP PULLING YOU ALONG LIKE THIS
PLEASE. HAVE MERCY.
IM GONNA END UP WITH A FUCKIN STOMACH ULCER AT THIS RATE (ALSO HES SO BIG WHAT THE FUCK)
pls herbie pls shes usING YOU
hes so supportive bless his little heart 🥺🥺
hes going to have an aneurysm
now he realises the monster hes made
oh no hes got his sleeves rolled up fuckkkkkkk
OH DEAR GOD IM A SUCKER FOR THAT KIND OF TOUSLED SUIT
HES TRYING TO BE SO GOOD OML
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via . ily and this fic and im its #1 fan so this is a fair warning . this feedback is LONG-
"old haven of knowledge" OK GIRL I SEE YOUR GAME (rubs hands together) this is gonna be GOOD
"i am literally a teenage girl and yet, you are the most delusional person I have ever met" y/n fired some shots damn you good over there seungs?
god the educators who think theyre ur friends are so true 😭😭 sometimes theyre fun but sometimes u dont wanna deal with them at all (ig this is also how teachers feel about students lol)
OH OFC JEONGIN IS THAT FRESHIE THAT GETS ADOPTED BY SENIORS LMFAODNWKDJWJW IT FITS SO WELL
daengyang besties fjsifwkdkw this is gonna be chaos 😼💥
"this is it, you thought, this is the last piece of my childhood i have left" way to make me sad all of a sudden damn??? now i gotta acknowledge that im also actually done with high school :(((
hello benji, idk who ur character is supposed to be inspired from but all i can think of is benji from superband lmao
OK THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY???? 😧😧😧 BENJI U MIGHT BE COMMITTING A FELONY SOON
trigo.... yeah no girl math aint for me but thank god y/n is a character lmdkcmwkdkw live my dream as a stem girly
oh? OH 😝 SEUNGMIN HAS A THING FOR THEIR HEIGHT DIFFERENCE OOOOOOOO ~~~~ (i am no better than a middle schooler.)
"i'm surprised you remembered" + seungmin's silence reminds me of when hyunjin told him what does he even know about how much he appreciates him im gonna pop a nerve from happiness
seungmin as a ghoster is so funny to me cause same bestie
INTERMISSION BREAK: icb im barely 1/3 finished AHAHAHAHAHA i love this
TOUSLED HAIR SEUNGMIN AAAAAAAAAAAAAA 🙈🙈🙈💗💗💗
"whose beaming smile rivalled the shine of a rainbow and whose honeyed voice washed over you like a soothing balm?" drowning myself this is such a good line
"look, your father doesn't love you." Y/N IS SUCH A MENACE HELLO?????
THE ROSE SCENE . THE DISCO PANG PANG . OH IM HAVING AN ANEURYSM FROM SCREAMING INTERNALLY IN THE MORNING
frenchboo 😭😭😭 im hollering its emily in paris but noelle
AAAAA SUCH A GOOD PROM THEME !! our senior's ball was bridgerton 🧍♀️ its cute enough ig
"You were so accustomed to the thought of each other, that you had become a reflection of each other. There was no Y/N L/N without Kim Seungmin and no Kim Seungmin without Y/N L/N." this whole section. OK VIA I SEE YOU 👁️👁️🤌
"All you cared about was that you finally had a person who would hold you while you break and pick up the pieces with you when you were ready, mending you and healing and hell, loving you back to a state of somewhat living." VIAAAAAAA 😭😭😭😭 IM SOBBING
HE REMEMBERS EVERYTHING ABOUT Y/N (SCREECHES) IM LOSING MY MINDDDDDD
"if you say so" grandma u get me fr 🙏 theyre IDIOTS (to lovers)
"erupting with giggles that turned into fake coughs which once again morphed into real coughs." FUCKING LEWSERS LMFAOOOOO /fond
"Oh, that's because I used to like you" convinced this fic was made in my memory thank you for remembering me and making this in front of my framed picture via 🤗
"Jisung's way of asking you if you were single." which you clearly should respond with "its complicated"
INTERMISSION BREAK: 2/3 done !! getting water before i finish this fic and eat breakfast
ive said this before but seungmin liking mean girls is canon in my world
noooo why did y/n change his contact name 💔 ello's dad was so cute
omg here's the part i beta read !!! hello binary stars scene
UH WHAT??? IS NO ONE GONNA BAT AN EYE OVER THAT RING SCENE??? BECAUSE IM GOING BATSHIT RN
HELLO MIMO 🥰🥰🥰 UR FINALLY HAVING A CAMEO IN MENTIONS MY BB im glad to know u do catering services
aw renjun bae </3 sorry for this honey ur such a cutie pie in this but things gotta happen for the plot yknow
NOT SEUNG'S SISTER 🙂 THAT GUY SHOULD PAYYYYY WTF
"You were going to make Kim Seungmin fall in love with prom, while falling in love with you as well." LETS GO MONARCH !!! 👑 but im pretty sure he alr likes you so-
-oh well that took a turn 🤕 first lovers quarrel yall
LMAO KENDRICK WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
SEUNGMIN'S PROMPOSAL .... AND APOLOGY BUT OMG I WISH THAT HAPPENED TO ME HUHUHUHU 😿💔
the paper cuts :((( baby worked hard on this plan so Y/N PLS ACCEPT HIM
ofc jeongin is getting into prom one way or another he's so sndjqndnwn
now sunshine twins helping y/n prep for prom??? Y/N I WANT TO BE YOU . EVEN IF U ALR HAVE MY NAME AND SPIRIT .
"You look beautiful, but then again, you do everyday." guys watch me do a flip . off a cliff .
seungmin having a simone ashely fanpage would be so funny ngl
HE'S PRINCIPAL NOW???? AWWWWW IM MELTING IM SO HAPPILY SAD ITS SO BITTERSWEET THEYRE ALL GROWN UP SOBS
OMG THEYRE ENGAGED HEEEEEHEEEEEEE 😭💞 FULL CIRCLE WAY TOO
3/3 done !! i loved this couple so much via 🤧💗 new comfort fic
overall, this was so well written !! the narrations and figures of speech were used to their best potential and i also love all the pop culture references they were so funny AHAHAHAHA the development and dynamic between the main characters was paced really well and i loved it so much <3 you did really well via, congratulations on finishing battleground 🎉🎉🎉
battleground
synopsis: you hated your co-president, kim seungmin. but, it's your last year of high school and prom planning is up to the two of you. you just expect getting work done and leaving school. what you don't expect however, is kim seungmin looking after you (considering you never do) and you coaxing him into being your prom date.
pairing: non-idol!seungmin x fem!reader
genre: academic rival to lovers, crack, fluff, high school au, angst if you squint
warnings: swearing, mentions of eating, mentions of fatigue and fainting, sickness and overworking, slight themes of stalking, panic attack but not mentioned as such, mentions of alcohol, overconsumption of alcohol, a shit ton of pop culture references (i'm sorry)
word count: 21k words (?!)
requested by: @starlostseungmin (hi kaisey ily)
playlist: gorgeous - taylor swift, true love - p!nk, CHILL - stray kids, make you mine - madison beer, teenage dream - katy perry
a/n: real life men are better of as just enemies. my fictional rendition of seungmin, however, is not. (also i hope it isn't obvious that i have never been to prom.)
"you ruined my life, by not being mine"
"Was that an attempt of trying to flirt with me? Cause, wow, you need to step your game up," Seungmin told you with a smirk.
Sunlight streamed through the library windows, illuminating the dust that covered the bookshelves. They were proof of the lack of visits to the old haven of knowledge. Settled in an armchair was Kim Seungmin, book in one hand, glasses slightly crooked and one legged propped upon the other.
You let out a puff of breath in an attempt to calm yourself down because, who did he even think he was? "No, Kim, it wasn't. I am literally a teenage girl and yet, you are the most delusional person I have ever meet," you spit out, "The principal's calling us. Let's go."
"Alright, fine," Seungmin responded lazily. He stretched his long limbs and got up from the armchair he was cozily tucked up in.
He joined you on your walk towards the principal's office while you told off whatever force was above that caused you to be walking to impeding doom with Kim Seungmin on a Friday morning.
You both had a bitter rivalry that began your first year in high school. Coinciding with the fact that the said high school was also a boarding school, there was no escaping Seungmin. You couldn't even pinpoint when your feelings towards him changed from indifference to animosity; but having been pitted against each other for all your academic life at Park Academy, it certainly did make sense.
It wasn't that you didn't respect Seungmin. He was good at everything he did and a worthy opponent in all your endeavors. But he just made it so difficult for you to like him.
Your already dysfunctional relationship with him only took a turn for the worse this high school senior year. Both of you had decided to run for student council president. Despite all the campaigning and emotional blackmailing, you both had tied for the position.
Your incredible school, instead of holding a tie-breaker, deciding to make you both student council presidents. The idea of writing 'student council co-president' on your college applications physically made you wince.
But the worst part? Seungmin and you actually worked really well together. Deciding to keep your rivalry out of anything student council related on your first session (the banter continued though, nothing could take that away), you both had built up one of the best councils the school had seen under your shared leadership.
You didn't know just how well you both would get along when it came to matters as such, but that didn't lead to either of you warming up to each other. Conversation between you both strictly consisted of official matters and jabs at each other.
In fact, you hated each other's presence so much that you both almost instantly decided on splitting responsibilities to avoid running into each other. Oddly enough, you both seemed to agree on a lot of things. You always just brushed it off with a, great minds think alike.
Not that you would ever confess to Seungmin that you considered him to be someone with a 'great mind'.
The both of you walked towards the principal's office in silence. When you eventually got there, the receptionist quickly ushered you both inside. You smoothed down your skirt and sat down with your hands in you lap. Beside you, you noticed Seungmin drape his blazer over the back of his chair and take a seat.
Your principal was on a call and winked at the both of you, pointing towards the phone and turning her finger around in a circle near her temple. Seungmin flashed her a strained smile while you hoped that the expression of judgment on your face wasn't obvious.
For some reason, Principal Kim thought that she was your friend. When she finally put the phone down, she snorted, "Superintendents, am I right?"
Seungmin and you laughed weakly in response. Principals, am I right? was the phrase you were currently trying very hard to bite back.
Coming closer, Principal Kim laced her fingers together and leaned onto the table. "As you both know," she began, "We have around five months till prom."
A buzzing grew in your stomach, excitement engulfing your senses. Prom. Your sole respite, the event that you had looked forward to your entire high school life. From watching Disney movies romanticizing prom at a young age, to subsequently moving onto books that did the same, you felt like prom would be the pinnacle of your time in school.
"Now," continued Principal Kim, "While I do know that you both have a tendency to work separately, I would like you both to chair the prom committee together this year. We are thinking of making this year's prom one of Park Academy's finest. Take your time and compile the best Prom committee you can and get started on everything."
She clapped her hand and leaned back, beaming at her best students. "That is all," she smiled softly, nudging a tray of toffees towards you both.
Seungmin looked mortified at the thought of eating something from the principal's office like he was six. In any other circumstance you would have too, but the giddiness of both prom planning and not having had anything for over twenty four hours compelled you to take one.
"Aren't you excited?" you asked Seungmin as you both walked out of the door.
You were opening the toffee wrapper when he responded with a curt, "No. I personally believe that prom is a waste of time. I'll help in the committee planning and be present if I need to, but you can rightfully assume that I will not be enjoying any of it."
You were slightly shocked at his response but responded with a scathing, "I didn't know that the Kim Seungmin was too high and haughty for prom."
He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to make eye contact with you. "Prom is like a playground for bullies and confused teenagers. It's a battleground for snarky comments and raging hormones and, might I add, brings out the worst in people."
He quickly turned on his heel and walked away before you could utter a word. You slowly let out a deep breath to control you anger and headed in the same direction as him, towards the cafeteria. You can hear the chatter of students and the sudden influx of sound momentarily causes your world to spin.
You're leaning against one of the lockers trying to steady yourself when feel an arm around your waist hoisting you up.
Hyunjin clicked beside you in disappointment. "Don't make me start feeding you now."
You just sighed in response and leaned your head against his shoulders. He was right, of course. You had the horrible habit of putting your health second (to last) with regards to anything that had to do with university and getting in. One of those things was skipping meals in favor of studying.
"I don't understand how people who sleep eight hours a day get shit done," you whined against Hyunjin.
"Well, has it ever occurred to you that people usually don't have as much shit to do as you do?" your best friend responded wisely. You lightly tapped the side of your sneaker against his.
Hwang Hyunjin was practically your brother in every aspect possible. He was lovable, caring, annoying and wanted to make you rip your hair out. All of this was what you assumed having a sibling was like, being an only child yourself. Ironically, he was one too.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You first met Hyunjin during an art class that you had to take for your first week of school. You struggled with drawing a straight line, while embarrassingly using a ruler. He was sitting beside you and calmly sketched one of the most incredible monochromatic landscapes you had ever seen.
When fourteen-year old Hyunjin gave your drawing a practically dangerous side eye and when you looked at him with eyes pleading to help you, the foundation of your friendship was laid. Later, when you handed him half a Snickers bar as a means of saying 'thank you', your friendship was cemented in chocolate and pencil shavings.
You both were joined at the hip ever since.
Your other best friend, Jeongin, had a habit of seemingly materializing out of nowhere and startling you in the process.
"Hi," he said, his face spawning in front of yours.
His wild hair and crazed smile caused you to yelp in surprise and hit your arm against the water fountain. Hyunjin laughed at your misfortune while Jeongin apologized with an extremely unapologetic smile. You resorted to glaring at both of them.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
The story of how Jeongin turned your duo into your trio was a tale in itself. Jeongin was a year younger than you and Hyunjin, currently a junior. You had first spotted him on his first day of school, him waddling around like a lost duckling and you unwittingly (and unwillingly) taking on the role of a mother hen.
Hyunjin had seen young Jeongin standing in the crowd, desperately trying to act cool. Jeongin's shoes were a painful pattern of key lime and hot pink that most definitely did not match together. He wore an oversized jacket and sent a small nod towards everyone who looked his way, hands jammed in his jeans pocket.
"That one," Hyunjin declared while dragging you along with him, "We're adopting that one."
And so two became three.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
Presently, you scoffed at Jeongin. "How did you even become student council vice president?"
Jeongin beamed at you, counting off his fingers as he listed of his campaigning winning qualities. "I'm hot, rich, smart and funny."
Hyunjin snorted in response, him on one side of you and Jeongin on the other. "Innie, you are several things but smart is not one of them."
You were compelled to nod in response as Jeongin responded with a gasp, "You too? How could you betray me as well."
You would have issued a sarcastic reply to what he said, but you were too distracted by Hyunjin being distracted. He had suddenly stood still at the entryway of cafeteria, staring at something in the distance.
When you followed his line of sight, you suppressed the urge to burst out into laughter. Jeongin, however, did not.
"Gosh Hyunjin," he wheezed between laughs, "Just ask Riya out. Watching you suffer in this down bad, unspoken friend zoned phase is pitiful."
Hyunjin had been in love with Riya Rai for well over two years. You could obviously tell why; she was gorgeous, smart and a part of Hyunjin's dance class. You were truly rooting for them to start dating, Riya being one of your roommates.
You still remembered the way Hyunjin gushed over her classical dance audition. ('I couldn't understand the words but it was like she was flying!') Jeongin too, was subject to Hyunjin's hopeless love for her. Being the kind of person Hyunjin was, he fell for her hard and deep.
You were happy for Hyunjin, you truly were. But a part of you longed to feel a love like that for somebody. Not even a relationship, just feel love dripping into your heart until it rushed in like a torrent.
You were always so busy with proving yourself to others, that you never really took the time to introspect your own desires.
"Hyunjin," you asked impatiently once you remembered what exactly you wanted to talk about.
"Hm?" he responded as you both grabbed your food and sat at a table with your regular friend group.
Riya slid in beside Hyunjin and you could feel him visibly tense. You couldn't understand why he was so nervous to profess his feelings for her. Any girl (apart from you, because ew) would be willing to date Hyunjin.
Riya brightly made her pleasantries after which you asked solemnly, "Guys. Would you do me the honor of being part of the prom planning committee?"
Riya and Hyunjin were the few people who shared the enthusiasm for prom which you did. Riya mouth slowly hung open while Hyunjin sharply took in a breath.
"Really?" he whispered in awe.
You nodded happily as Hyunjin hugged you from one side and Riya clambered over to where you were sitting to wrap her arms around you. "IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou," she repeated like a chant while Hyunjin excitedly began plotting décor ideas.
Maybe you wouldn't need romantic love while you had them.
You were busy people watching and tuning out Riya and Hyunjin's enthusiastic chatter when you caught site of Seungmin. He was sitting with his best friend, Lee Felix. You found their friendship quite odd. How could the embodiment of happiness be so close with the devils spawn?
I guess opposites attract platonically too.
You lamented at the thought of co-heading a prom committee with a partner who hated prom until an idea struck you. If Kim Seungmin hated prom, you could teach him how to love it. That lunch break, you made an executive decision that, unbeknown to you, would inevitably change you life.
You decided to open Kim Seungmin's eyes to the brilliance of prom.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - five months.
Seungmin stood next to you as you both waited for the rest of the student council members to make their way for your impromptu Saturday meeting. The two of you stared up at one of the most monstrous things you had ever seen in your lives.
A large banner with a blue background and the words "T-5 MONTHS TILL PROM!!!" in an ugly orange text stared back at you.
You gaped at the banner, seething with anger. "Let me find the person whose amazing idea this was and rearrange their body proportions for them."
Seungmin just responded calmly, "Maybe this is a sign from the universe to get our act together, delegate responsibilities to the committee and actually get started on prom."
"Not all of us are as optimistic as you, Kim," you told him dryly.
"Not all of us have an insatiable bloodlust, candy cane," he retorted monotonously.
Your mouth pressed into a thin line as you turned to see Seungmin's eyebrow cocked in a persumed sense of superiority.
You despised the nickname, a knowing jab at your short stature. Seungmin first called you candy cane when he noted how your height was nearly equivalent to the candy canes lining your school halls in your junior year.
It had stuck when you both were privately conversing with each other ever since.
His indifference slightly bristled you, but then again you were known for having a slightly short temper.
Chatter flowed in through the library's door, accompanied by the sound of sneakers squeaking against the floor. People who you and Seungmin had individually contacted, along with most student council members, began entering the room.
You noticed Hyunjin making his way to sit next to Riya, who was busy in conversation with Felix. The three of them were known for being close due to dance club. You shot Hyunjin an encouraging smile and he gave you a slightly crooked one.
Jeongin bounded up to the front to assume his rightful place as vice president. You ruffled his hair and he pinched your arm in retaliation. Your little squeal and his irritated grunt earning an annoyed look from Seungmin.
He cleared his throat loudly, instantly commanding the attention of the entire room. Faces turned to look at him when his voice called out, "I hope you all know why we have gathered here today."
He turned to look at you, your cue to begin talking. "As you may be aware, you all have been selected as this year's Park Academy Prom Committee!"
The room burst into applause as Seungmin continued, a routine familiar to you both. You didn't know how the two of you did it. Without even prior conversation, you two fell into sync when it came to addressing the crowd in front of you for your co-lead student council meetings.
Once again you chalked it up to, great minds think alike. There was no way you and Seungmin had anything else in common, apart from the occasional train of thought.
Right?
When your long sermon was finally finished, the room was buzzing with excitement. Teenage hormones and the onset of prom brewed a recipe for eager anticipation. This is it, you thought, this is the last piece of my childhood I have left.
On the advice of Principal Kim, you and Seungmin split the overall committee into three groups: one for decorations, one for publicity and one to arrange entertainment.
Jeongin had proclaimed himself the 'god of social media' and sauntered off to the group in charge of publicity. Hyunjin, Riya and Felix automatically were presumed to be part of décor, with Hyunjin elected head of their group. ('I will not let my team down. Over my dead fucking body,' he told you in complete seriousness later that day.)
Finally, you and Seungmin were left handling booking and anything else payment and transaction related. Principal Kim's vehement repetition of how she only trusted the two of you with cash was seared into your brain.
As you both took rounds of the large library hall, something kept nagging at you, itching the back of your brain. It disheartened you to see how warmly everyone interacted with Seungmin in comparison with you.
What bothered you even more, however, was how warmly Seungmin, interacted with others when compared to you.
Being likable was one of, if not the biggest goal in your life. Knowing that a single person disliked you sent you into a frenzy. Call it your upbringing or society, either way you felt like everybody you knew had to find you to be a good person, or else you weren't.
Other people's opinions were like medicine to you. Gaining external validation became such a large part of your life that sometimes, you forgot that what you thought, what you wanted, mattered as well.
And in this draining people-pleasing process, you weren't quite 'friends' with everyone. You were friendly and appreciated among your students, yes. But you didn't have a large friend group full of people who cherished your very existence, like Seungmin.
That was probably why you called Hyunjin and Jeongin were your best friends. It took away from the fact that they were your only friends. Seeing them with their own, other friends hurt, but it was too late now.
There was no point making more friends when you would be gone anyways. And despite how much you wanted to, you knew that creating deeper connections only to break them away would prove pointless.
You and Seungmin settled into the small bean bag pods which were propped up against the empty library walls. He scrolled through his phone with utmost concentration as you did the same, tapping away at your laptop keys.
"We'll have to sit with Lily for planning the budget," Seungmin broke the silence while referring to the committee treasurer, "But she has texted me the overall amount we have in the trust."
Seungmin opened the message and angled his phone towards you, eliciting a gasp from your mouth.
"That is an insane amount. Do you know what this means? We truly can make this Park Academy's best prom yet!" you excitedly began listing off the non-existent limits to which the money could spent.
"You forgot something," Seungmin added, stunning you to silence. What could have you forgotten about prom which Seungmin could have remembered?
The stoic expression on his face, however, told you it was nothing good.
"We need to show extreme constraint while using the money and be strict on the group," Seungmin huffed.
You blew in anger, "The entire point of having an extensive budget is to let loose! God, you're like the Grinch of prom or something."
"Please sweetheart," he snorted, "I'm far better looking than him. Even you can't deny that."
And as infuriating Seungmin seemed to you, he was correct. Seungmin was drop dead gorgeous. Even in a plain school uniform, he had the power to turn several heads. In fact, you would be lying if you said that you didn't find him a teensy bit attractive.
Not that he would ever obtain that information.
Seungmin went back to work, looking for banquet halls and hotels open to being the venue for prom. You observed him carefully, trying to figure the psychology behind why he hated prom. Then, you realized that to to succeed in your mission, you didn't have too.
The Grinch fell in love with Christmas too...
"I have made an executive decision," you announced to no one but Seungmin in particular.
He looked up, an expression of boredom and confusion coating his features.
"How exactly, darling, did you take an executive decision without consulting half of the executive. I thought you were smart enough to know how decision making takes place," a smug smile adorned him.
You rolled your eyes at him, "I will make you like prom."
Seungmin scoffed, "As if. You know what, Y/N? I bet you can't."
You sighed in fake defeat, cheering inside. One thing about having an academic rival was predicting their moves to the point where you knew how to trap them. It was like a game of chess, where Seungmin thought he had the upper hand, but you were one move away from checkmate.
You understood what made Seungmin tick, what ignited passion in him and what triggered him. You knew how to get a rise out of him and get him to calm down. More terrifyingly so, you knew that he knew the same.
You likened it to years of shared dislike, denying the fact that you both maybe were alike.
"I mean, considering our role in the entire organization of prom, we'll be stuck together all night anyways," you lamented in disappointment, "Truthfully speaking, I honestly did expect you to decline my invitation to formally attend prom with me as my de facto date."
"Although I wasn't planning on calling you that," you included for good measure.
You decided to deviate from telling him the real reason why you wanted to take him to prom. Out of everyone in this school, Seungmin was the last person left whose good books you didn't have so much as a footnote in.
You knew that this little social experiment of yours to leave school with everyone singing praises about you was highly selfish, but you needed this to feel worthy of graduating. You needed this to feel worthy of being a part of a social communities.
You could practically see the anger teeming from Seungmin at proving you right. "Fine," he spit out, "I'll be your date."
Checkmate.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - four months and 16 days.
With final assessments right around the corner, physical committee meetings came to a halt. All conversations took place through group chats and the occasional locker meetups. In all the frenzy of studying, you were once again indulging in sleepless nights and nutrition-less days.
Seungmin had gone into hibernation mode and as had you. All your phones were on do not disturb and casual fun was out of the question. Today, you had taken release in the library, headphones on and coffee in hand.
You were (pathetically, to some, advantageously, to you) on a first name basis with the resident librarian. Because of you often staying late nights (correction: all night) in the library, you even had your own spare key to lock up when you were done. It was a little secret you both shared.
Today, however, you felt uneasy. A transfer student by the name of Benji had been unceasingly making romantic advances towards you the past week. Although you reject him multiple times, his feats of grandeur only grew.
He was currently sitting a few tables away from you, the only other person in the library apart from librarian Kang. Even though he attempted to look busy and engrossed in the book in his hand, he kept stealing glances from you.
It was late, very much so. Everybody would be asleep and you didn't want to disturb anyone. You calmed your nerves but reached your breaking point when Kang asked Benji if he planned to leave anytime soon and he refused.
In a state of both fear and fatigue, you dialed the number of the only person who you knew would be awake at this time and waited for the call to ring out.
"Hello?" came Seungmin's bewildered voice. You rarely called him and even then, never at this hour.
"Seungmin, hi. I was wondering if I could ask you for a favor?" you asked him, hoping to suppress the anxiety in your voice.
He must have noticed though, because his voice was alert. "Sure, what's up?"
"You know how Benji has been treating me, right?"
He hummed in acknowledgement. Of course he knew. Benji boasted so much that everyone knew.
"Well, I'm in the library and so is he. He's the only one here and it's kinda freaking me out. If it's ok with you, can you please just stay on call with me just in case? You can put me on hold or something, just please be active. I'm really sorry but you're the only other person who I knew would be awake right now."
You heard rustling in the background and his voice finally came back, "Wait. My dorm is loud anyways so I'll meet you there."
"Oh, okay, okay."
To your extreme relief, Seungmin did not hang up the call. Instead, you could hear his footsteps. All the mundane sounds of him locking his dorm, shoes slapping against the concrete and heavy breathing (due to running, but that didn't make sense) oddly calmed you down.
That was, however, until Benji walked over to where you were sitting. He gave you a venomous smile and leaned over to books right above your head. Pulling out a book from the shelf above your head and walked away, something sharp glinting in his hand.
You breathing quickened. "Seungmin, he has a sharp object. I have assessed all possible escape routes. I would suggest that you leave as I will probably as well if the situation escalates."
"Are you fucking out of your mind?" he questioned, almost sounding angry that you had even thought of saying something like that.
"I'm not leaving you alone with him or giving him an opportunity to fuck with the students of this school. He may be here for only two weeks, but I'll make sure he doesn't hurt a single person."
The steel in his voice made you shudder. You did not want to be on Kim Seungmin's death list. The library doors swung open as librarian Kang let out an exasperated sigh.
"Another wannabe Einstein," she muttered under her breath as Seungmin made his way towards you.
He looked like a sight for sore eyes in his plain sweater and gray sweatpants. Seungmin gave you a subtle not and took a seat right beside you, pulling out his books and tablet. Soon you both started studying and, before you knew it you both were engaged in a heated competition to see who could solve as many trigonometry problems as possible correctly, in the least time.
Throughout this duration, you didn't find out much personally about him, but saw a more carefree side of him. In fact, you liked this carefree side of him.
He winced when you pointed out the simple mistake he made that caused him to lose in the end. "I can't believe I've forgotten what the division symbol looks like."
You giggled and poked his arm, legs underneath your feet. "Is this what letters in math is doing to you?"
Seungmin shrugged sheepishly with a tiny smile. "Go ahead, shortcake, gloat."
Instead, you posed him with a question, "Why do you always insult my height? Like, that seems to be your favorite."
Maybe, just maybe, you were imagining it, but you saw a light blush scatter over Seungmin's cheeks. He cleared his throat and, in what must have been a moment of vulnerability said, "You are good at literally everything else. Your height is the only thing I can ask you about."
You stared at him slightly open mouthed at his sudden respect. In an instant, the room felt to hot and Seungmin's face felt to close to yours. The moment was broken, however, by the simultaneous and not at all harmonious chorus of a chair scratching against the floor and you're stomach rumbling.
Benji was gone and but your appetite was back. Seungmin must have heard it too because his right eyebrow was ticked up.
"When, exactly, did you last eat?"
"Today," you admitted sheepishly, "Morning. At 6."
"And what was it?"
Another gulp. "A banana."
Seungmin shook his head in disappointment and rifled through his bag. He pulled out a mushed granola bar and handed it to you.
"Eat," he commanded.
"Okay," you said meekly. "Wait, this is my favorite brand!"
"Yeah, I think you mentioned that before," Seungmin said nonchalantly, but you noted the slight quiver in his voice.
You took a bite and it felt like your body was screaming at you. It felt so good to eat after just having six in the morning bananas for the past few days, that you little out an embarrassing little squeal in content.
"I'm surprised you remembered," you referenced Seungmin earlier statement and folded the wrapper in a neat rectangle. Putting it in your pocket to throw away later, you waited for Seungmin's response.
It never came. His head was bent and he was hard at work, evidently ignoring. Seeing this as an indication that the conversation was over, you got back to your own work. That wasn't, however, without a feeling of something new that wasn't hate - adjacent.
You felt a little blossom of affection in your stomach for the boy flipping through the pages of his notebook beside you.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - it's finals!
You slammed your Astrophysics textbook against your desk, yet again unable to get stuff to fit in your brain. It was your last final and while you crammed for your other subjects, Seungmin had told Hyunjin that you were back to your old habits. Hyunjin and Riya had then joined hands and blackmailed you into (yuck) taking care of yourself.
"Seriously," you grumbled, "How do people who get eight hours of sleep get their shit done?"
Finally coming to the conclusion that you were helpless, you reached for your phone to text all your questions to Seeun, the assistant teacher. Seeun was a university student interning at your school, and an alumni as well. Citing how she was very much close in age with the students of your grade (if six years is considered 'close'), she insisted that you all call her Seeun and not Miss Choi.
You were in such a rush that you didn't even check for typos, tackling another chapter while waiting for Seeun's response. You still had one more day to study, considering that your exam was the day after tomorrow, you were going to use all twenty four hours and more to your advantage, not wasting a single bit.
Finding it odd that Seeun still hadn't responded considering how bored she always said she was and her frighteningly quick response times, you decided to check your phone. To your horror, however, you found out that in your rush, instead of sending your questions to Seeun, you had sent them to Seungmin.
His responses were almost instantaneous.
[8:18 AM]
You: [sent attachment]
You: Hi Seeun, I had a few questions regarding these topics. I was wondering if we could meet up tmrw to discuss them? Thx!
[8:20 AM]
kim stuck-up seungmin (sigh): i'm not seeun, but i could help
kim stuck-up seungmin (sigh): i tutored a few seniors taking this class last year
kim stuck-up seungmin (sigh): if you want, how does the coffee shop down the street at eight sound to you?
You were practically smiling at your phone. It obviously had to do about the fact that it was someone offering you help, not that it was Seungmin specifically. (Duh?) After waging a long, internal war, you finally opted to sacrifice what little dignity you had in front of Seungmin's eyes and take him up on his offer.
[2:47 PM]
You: really? omg thx!
You: see you then
[2:48 PM]
kim stuck-up seungmin (sigh): k, ig i'll see you there
Huh. Weird. Seungmin was notorious for being known to reply to people after a minimum of at least two hours, if they were lucky enough not to be left on read.
Not reading to much into it, you went back to work. Work wasn't just work though. It was an influx of nervous butterflies accompanying it. Not that it had anything to do with Seungmin, of course.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
When you got to the coffee shop that morning, it was technically 7:55. But, as you had always been taught, five minutes early is on time. Seungmin must have abided by that philosophy too, because soon he stumbled through the door.
You hadn't even picked a table to sit at when he tapped you shoulder and said, "Hey."
You turned to find Seungmin with the same green, battered back pack he took everywhere slung over one shoulder. His hair was tousled in an endearing way that made you want to squish him. His eyes were surprisingly warm and his lips were turned up.
"Like what you see sweetheart?" he teased.
You rolled your eyes at him, "No, of course not. It's like looking at something so hideous that you can't peel your eyes off of it."
He gave you a good natured laugh and walked alongside you to the coffee table.
After much deliberation, which mainly consisted of you and Seungmin arguing over the pros and cons of a window seat, you finally settled on a seat close enough to the large glass window for Seungmin's satisfaction and far enough to not prove distracting to you.
When your sugar packet tower fell down in the process of building it, he grinned at you again. It felt nice, having Seungmin's smile directed towards you.
Whoa, slow down there. Are you ok?
Without even realizing what you were saying, you asked Seungmin, "Why do you always cover your face when you laugh?"
Seungmin's smile slightly faded. "When I was in middle school, I used to wear braces. The kids... they found it weird, which meant they found me weird."
You were shocked. How could anyone dislike his smile? Seungmin's smile was one of the prettiest smile's you had ever seen. And mind you, you used to hate Kim Seungmin.
Used to. Now, it was more like you were tolerating him, sometimes even appreciating him. Wow, something really is wrong with you.
You snorted. "If I could travel back in time," you declared, "I would deck those dumbasses in the phase."
Seungmin choked on the coffee that the waitress had dropped off a few minutes ago. He surprisingly remembered your order, despite you only mentioning it to him during his student council coffee runs only once or twice before.
"Y/N, I'm pretty sure that's a crime," Seungmin snickered.
You raised your eyebrows in response. "And if you don't help me with this, I'm about to commit a crime, and you won't be in a position to testify."
With that, the lessons began.
Seungmin was an extremely good teacher. He was well known among the student body for being the kind of tutor that took F grades and turned them into a B+ or A-. Even you wanted to start tutoring, but your patience often wore thin faster than it did for others.
Seungmin though, didn't break a sweat. He revised concepts over and over again until you understood, making sure that at the end, you didn't have a single semblance of a doubt in your mind when it came to the related topic.
Two hours later, you were finally done.
"Now," Seungmin announced, "We will have some fun and let loose."
You were putting your books inside when you clicked a pen in your hand restlessly. "You, prim and proper Kim Seungmin, want to 'let loose' and 'have some fun'?"
Seungmin clicked his tongue in exasperation. "Look tiny, I'm disciplined, but I know my limits. You have already studied everything to the T. Plus, your exam is tomorrow. Get some fresh air and take a break now, then revise once more in the evening."
You wondered how he could be so careless when he probably had an exam tomorrow too. "What about you? Don't you have to study as well?"
Seungmin sent you a devious grin and you felt your knees go weak a little (No. What?)
"I had my last exam yesterday, honey," he happily shared, patting your head in mock pity in the process.
Honey, that was new. You were so used to the reoccurrences of 'darling', 'sweetheart' and terms related to your height that the new nickname caught you slightly off guard.
You hoped the expression on your face clearly conveyed that you found his actions traitorous. "How dare you prey on a vulnerable young woman just to quench your loneliness?"
"Come on," Seungmin coaxed, "We can hit the boardwalk, get lunch and go back to the dorms. You and I both know that we aren't invited to Saturday gatherings due to unfortunately being classified as 'nerds'."
In the end, you relented. After all, who can say no to someone whose beaming smile rivalled the shine of a rainbow and whose honeyed voice washed over you like a soothing balm?
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
Boardwalk was the name that the students had given to the all year amusement park reminiscent set up that was just a few minutes away from the dorms. You had come here several times, but rarely with someone else and mostly to clear your head. (And watch toddlers shrieking on the carousel).
The moment you got your pink wristbands, Seungmin dragged you to the stalls where you played to win a plushie. He was so intent on winning something that you found it almost adorable.
"You do know that these are all scams, right? There's no way you'll win," you stated confidently, disregarding the mammoth scowl on the game operators face."
Seungmin lazily picked up a dart and aimed for the balloons hung on the wall. He cocked his head towards you and gave you a wink, "This one's for you, sweetheart."
To your utmost surprise, the dart hit the balloon perfectly. Even Seungmin looked stunned. The operator offered him another dart and you a self-assured smirk. He once again hit the dart again, with a satisfying pop!.
"All right folks," the operator droned, "Pick a stuffed toy."
Seungmin nudged you slightly, "Which one?"
You glanced at him, "You won, so it's only fair that you choose."
Seungmin smirked at you, "Nope. I recall mentioning that that one was for you."
Heat pooled in your stomach, which shouldn't have. Especially when the cause were Kim Seungmin.
"Okay," you jutted out your head to make eye contact with him and turned back to choose the lucky stuffed toy.
You pointed at a medium sized elephant plushie and grabbed it eagerly. Holding it tight to your chest you said, "What should we name our child Seungmin?"
He presented you with no reply and a face contorted with judgement.
Pouting, you mockingly told the elephant, "Look, your father doesn't love you."
Feigning an offended gasp, Seungmin promptly snatched the elephant from you, "Don't listen to your mother, Ello."
"Ello?" You laughed.
"Shh," Seungmin chastised, "Let my inner European be free."
The mild spring breeze whipped your hair around and you took of your jacket, wrapping it around your waist. You spotted a fallen rose and quickly went to pick it up. It was still in pristine condition and in a random bout of girlhood, you tried to tuck it behind your ear.
Silently, Seungmin motioned towards you taking Ello and you handing him the rose. Seungmin somehow managed to break of the thorns without cutting himself.
Delicately lifting up the hair behind your hair, he began to adjust the rose in place. Since he was considerably taller than you, Seungmin leaned in front. You could see every valley and crevice in his face and for some reason, you wanted to hold it in your arms.
A rush thumped through your chest. As silly as it seemed, nobody had ever quite touched you like that. Seungmin's breath smelled like chocolates and cinnamon.
A rebellious part if you wondered if that was what he would taste like.
Lightly clearing his throat, he continued walking and you followed wordlessly. A few random rides later, you both finally found yourself in front of the Disco Pang Pang. A smile tugged at your lips. You were so going on this ride today.
Cheeks flushed from the fun you were having, you said breathlessly, "Let's go."
Seungmin visibly gulped, "I don't know."
"Aw come on, don't tell me you're scared." Seeing the petrified expression on his face however, you quickly retracted your statement. "It's fine, we don't have to,"
"No, it's okay," Seungmin managed weakly, "Just, hold me please."
Handing Ello to one of the fair volunteers, you both clambered up the metal stairs and took a seat on the foam benches. Seungmin was right next to you, his arm around the railing of where you sat.
Your initial excitement of experiencing this wore off, however, when the machine suddenly lurched forward. It threw Seungmin on you and his arms instinctively curved around your waist.
The warmth from his body radiated into you and for a moment stayed frozen, eyes glued on each other. You felt electric shocks where he touched you and trembled slightly.
Catching his breath, Seungmin began to apologize profusely. "I'm sorry I didn't mean too-"
The machine lurched again and again. Seungmin had figured out how to maintain his balance and stayed the distance of an arm's length away from you. When it was finally over, you both stumbled onto solid ground, clutching your stomachs.
"That. Was. Awesome!" You decided, delight etching your face.
"I'm convinced you're a six year old boy stuck in an eighteen year old girl's body," Seungmin groaned.
Agreeing upon this being enough fun for one day you both walked back to the dorms and went your separate ways. Astoundingly, Seungmin's advice of taking a break in between studying did help and you noticed that you were retaining information better.
You wanted to thank him and grabbed your phone.
[7:26 PM]
You: ty maybe.
You: I *kinda* had fun today
[7:30 PM]
Ello's dad: just admit it darling
Ello's dad: im fun
[7:31 PM]
You: in ur dreams Kim, in ur dreams
[7:32 PM]
Ello's dad: well then, ig I'll be dreaming of you tonight
You smiled despite yourself and went to bed.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - three months and twenty-five days.
Your relationship with Seungmin was somehow significantly improving. Yes, you still did indulge in your regular banter, but you both now had the ability to have full conversations without actually insulting the other person.
Your exams were finally over and, as presumed, both you and Seungmin had equal grades. What you didn't expect however, was even sharing the title of valedictorian with Seungmin.
The you before your impromptu study session would have been spitting fireballs. The you currently was looking forward to embarrassing Seungmin a little bit (in all good fun), during your moment in the spotlight.
In the fast paced environment of writing finals, wrapping up college applications and facing parents at parent - teacher meetings, the prom committee had forgotten one, extremely crucial component of prom planning: Picking a theme.
It was so stupid, really. None of you even realized until the décor committee was busy trying to decide on decorations and Felix meekly articulated, "Uh, guys. I don't think we ever decided on a set theme."
Seungmin eyes grew wide and you took in a sharp breath. How could you forget something so important? Frantic chatter arose and in a futile-ish attempt, you yelled out to the students, "Guys! Let's just come up with ideas, but in an orderly fashion."
In an instant, the room began quieting down and hands were raised, full of ideas. Seungmin gave you an impressed look and everyone slowly began suggesting various prom themes.
"What if," Noelle screamed from the back of the room, "We had a Paris inspired theme? I know, Paris nights!"
The entire room let out a collective groan. If Korea had koreaboos, then Noelle was some fucked up version of a French-boo. She boasted to whoever would listen that she had French blood, if being named Noelle and visiting Canada for two weeks constituted French heritage.
Riya ears perked up however, and she asked, "How about Aphrodite's Garden?"
You and Seungmin exchanged a look. "Elaborate," asked Seungmin.
Hyunjin gave Riya an encouraging shove and she stood up, "How about a spring theme, but instead of the classic flowers and leaves, it's more sensual and inspired by Greek mythology?"
The room broke into excited conversation, seemingly approving of Riya's idea. Hyunjin stood up next to her, "Riya and I could prepare a mood board and send it to the group chat."
"All in favor," Seungmin asked. A clear majority.
"Perfect," you smiled, "Then it's settled. The theme will be Aphrodite's Garden."
The room went back to it's raucous state as you stepped aside for a moment, head pounding from a headache. You had a cold and staying up all night studying for scholarship tests did not help. You knew you had to pass them though. You weren't willing to give your parents another reason to demean you for being a burden.
You were massaging your temples when Seungmin came up from behind you. "Are you okay?" he asked, voice laced with concern.
"Yep," you tried to muster a positive tone, "Just a headache. I'm peachy."
"Peachy?" Seungmin inquired, his eyebrow cocked upwards and tone full of mischief.
"Don't assume that I don't use the word peachy unironically," you huffed.
Still, Seungmin's apprehensive expression and the exponentially increasing pounding in your head made you feel your gut that something bad was brewing.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You, Jeongin and Hyunjin waited patiently in the computer lab the next day. Hyunjin and Riya had made the mood board for Aphrodite's Garden, but wanted the input of you, Seungmin and Jeongin.
All three of you stood near the window, peering out of the glass and observing the ant-like players on the soccer field below. You wondered what was so appealing about kicking a ball on a Saturday morning.
Hyunjin looked troubled, "I want to ask Riya to prom. But I don't know how."
You let out a sneeze in response and Hyunjin wordlessly handed you a tissue, the despair never leaving his face.
You slightly understood the reasoning behind Hyunjin's thinking. It was promposal season, people planning elaborate and innovative ways to ask each other to prom. Considering the high school you were at, this more often than not involved Rube Goldberg machines and periodic table confessions.
Jeongin let out an audibly exasperated huff of breath. "If you like Riya, just ask her out. The worst she could say is no."
Before you could add onto Jeongin's admonishment, a voice cut through the room.
"What?"
Your eyes widened as you clapped your hand to your mouth. Hyunjin felt himself stumble backwards and Jeongin muttered a low "Fuck" under his breath.
Judging by the tone of the voice and familiar sweetness, you knew it could only belong to one person. Time felt like a concept out of grasp as you, Hyunjin and Jeongin turned to face Riya, standing in the doorway with shock painted on her face.
"I- I can't," she tripped over the doorstep, "Look, I'll just send them to you, I-"
Riya steadied herself, holding on the the doorframe, and then fled the room. Hyunjin glanced at you, his eyes full of pleading.
"Go, quickly," you commanded, and he rushed out of the room in Riya's stead.
"See, this is why you're my favorite," Hyunjin told you while ruffling you, scowling at Jeongin. You sniffed in response as Jeongin's jaw clenched.
Just then, Seungmin entered the room, giving both Hyunjin and Riya and irritated glare. "Weren't they supposed to show us something?"
"They'll just send it to one of us," you told Seungmin, your voice coming out weaker than expected.
"You know what," Jeongin threw his hands up in the air in rage, "Fuck this. If they are out, I am out."
Seungmin stared at you quizzically, as if trying to unravel the pieces of the puzzle that made you, well, you. His eyes must have taken in your sickness - stricken state because the curiosity on his face morphed into concern.
"Are you okay?" Seungmin asked, stepping closer to you.
"Fine," you choked out, but you knew you weren't.
Your head felt like a thousand drills were screwing into it. You felt hot and cold at the same time, throat parched and dry. Your body felt like lead, being weighed down at ever movement. You knew these were the textbook symptoms of a fever and then some more.
You tried to walk forward, but couldn't hold your balance. Dazed, you felt your consciousness slowly slip away due to the lack of sleep you were forcing yourself to put up with it. Exhaustion didn't come to you in raindrops, it came to you in a torrential shower.
The last thing you felt was Seungmin's arms holding you up as your entire world shrouded in darkness.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
When you came to, you were still in the classroom, water droplets running down your face. Seungmin looked guilty and the bottle of water in his hand told you everything you needed to know.
"Sorry," Seungmin said sheepishly, "I didn't know what else to do."
You waved him off, still trying to fully gain control of your senses. You blinked slowly and languidly, adjusting slowly to the light. The sudden shift from complete darkness to windows that let in natural light was slightly painful.
You placed your palms flat against the floor, where Seungmin had most likely placed you. The cool sting of the marble tiles was a welcoming sensation, the bite of it rebooting your brain. You straightened your skirt but your head was still fucking hurting.
"What exactly happened?" you asked weakly.
You knew that women were often taken advantage of in such situations. You knew you could trust Seungmin with your life though. He would never hurt you in any sense, and the past few weeks only solidified that fact for you. Still, asking was like second nature for you.
"Oh, uhm, you fell and I caught you and somehow managed to lean you against the wall," Seungmin stuttered.
He let out a weary sigh and rubbed his eyes vigorously. It was almost as if he was the one who had just fainted and was sitting on a cold marble floor. The thought made you laugh, but the way your chest constricted in pain when the laugh travelled up your bones made you push it down.
"Let's-" you managed until you let out a sneeze, "Let's get back to work. Hyunjin or Riya must have sent the designs by now."
Seungmin looked at you, appalled. "No. Are you insane? You probably are. I'm taking you back to your dorms and making you something warm to eat, no questions asked."
"Seungmin, you don't have to," you let out, your voice hoarse. But despite your mental and vocal protests, your body couldn't fight it anymore. It was begging, screaming for help and you had ignored it wrong enough."
Seungmin set you a look that could kill and held out his palm. You grabbed onto it, and with his help stood up. You legs were so weak, however, that you fell forward again. The world was spinning and you were falling and falling until you weren't.
The entire time, only one thought rang over and over again in your head, like a sickly song.
Was success, was making the people around you proud, was your hard work really worth this form of self inflicted torture you were putting yourself through?
Seungmin's arms steadied your waist as you arms flew up to his shoulders. You were in close proximity now, close enough that you could see your reflection in his eyes. God, you looked like shit.
The concern in his eyes and the pain you were both mentally and physically going through finally made you snap.
Without warning, tears filled your eyes and cascaded down your cheeks. You were so, so tired. Seungmin didn't say anything, but he understood. Of course he understood. You couldn't deny it any longer. Being compared and set against each other didn't make you two poles on other sides of your respective worlds; in fact, it did the very opposite.
You were so accustomed to the thought of each other, that you had become a reflection of each other. There was no Y/N L/N without Kim Seungmin and no Kim Seungmin without Y/N L/N.
Your lives had become so intricately intertwined that the thought of a world without Seungmin, without the jabs and maddening nicknames, without the warm smiles that were solely reserved for you when somebody made an out of pocket comment at one of your student council meetings, felt impossible.
You felt your arms effortlessly slip down Seungmin's shoulder and around his waist. Your head automatically found a spot on his chest. You knew that your tears were staining his shirt, you knew that you were helpless and vulnerable, but you didn't care.
Seungmin kept you anchored as your mind swam through every dark tunnel that dug itself throughout your life. This time, you weren't frolicking in them. This time, you weren't finding solace in them because of your self proclaimed incompetence.
This time, you were sealing them shut for good and the only reason you could was because you knew Seungmin was there. He was there, he was there, he was there.
When Seungmin lightly placed his chin over your head, you didn't mind being short. His hands soothingly smoothed your hair over and over again as you noiselessly let out all the pent up emotions and feelings that grew into this black hole that was sucking the life out of you.
You stepped back. "I'm sorry," you sobbed.
"It's fine, you're good," he whispered softly.
Holding you forearm gently, he walked you out of the room you both were in and in the direction of your dorm. You furiously rubbed at your cheeks, attempting to lose any indication of you previously pathetic state, but you stopped when a shot of something you hadn't felt in a long time rushed back to you: indifference.
In this moment, you didn't care that the regality with which you held yourself in front of Seungmin and the world was soiled under your feet.
All you cared about was that you finally had a person who would hold you while you break and pick up the pieces with you when you were ready, mending you and healing and hell, loving you back to a state of somewhat living.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
Your hands were shaking so much and your vision was so blurry when you tried to unlock your dorm room door that Seungmin had to ease the key out of your finger. He slid it in and with a click, the door swung upon.
You pulled out strength from the nooks and crannies of your being to actually change into something comfortable. Seungmin surprisingly also had a change of clothes in his bag, until you later remembered that he had baseball matches every Saturday morning at dawn.
You came out of your room wearing cat faced pajamas that were a little big for you but cozy nonetheless. Seungmin looked you up and down with a smirk on his face.
"Shall I call you kitty cat now?" his tone heavy with fake torment and real intention.
There was no way you were getting out of this one.
"Shut up, puppy," you referenced the small puppy face on his t-shirt as you padded towards the bar stools that stood along your kitchen counter.
"Okay, kitty cat," he grinned while you groaned.
In the fifteen minutes Seungmin had spent inside your dorm room, he had located the medicine cabinet and slid a bottle of Tylenol and a spoon. You withered under his expectant stare and duly obliged.
"Fair warning," Seungmin said casually as he took out some instant ramen and a saucepan, "I'm a horrible cook."
You probably would have flipped him off for his easy-going tone while saying that he could food poison you if he wasn't the reason you were in the comfort of your home right now.
"Just don't give me acidity. I would probably die and if I do, best believe I'll come back to haunt your ass," you muttered.
"Relax," Seungmin's tone was slightly offended, "Have faith in me. I can make at least instant ramen."
"If you insist," you sighed.
Seungmin passed the bowl of steaming hot ramen towards you, vapor still rising from it. You blew on it and took a bite, the heat instantly making you feel better. Seungmin sat beside you and began eating as well. You both lunched in silence, only the sounds of your spoons hitting your bowls and the occasional slurp filling the room.
You let out a yawn and Seungmin was quick to tell you that the instructions on the instructions stated that you had to wait an hour before sleeping if you had eaten anything after administering it.
To kill time, you suggested watching something on television. Seungmin joined you on the couch. You wrapped a warm blanket around you while Seungmin shifted through your Netflix catalogue, evidently pleased with your taste in media.
You started speaking, "You know, I was thinking of watching -"
At the same time Seungmin began, "I was actually planning on starting -"
"Three Body Problem," you both finished at the same time.
Reflections, reflections.
Seungmin played the first episode and you both watched in transfixed awe and silence. Seungmin kept checking on you in between though. It was never something major, but small things, like handing you the only pillow on the couch and passing a bottle of water at regular intervals.
"Wow," you said breathlessly as if you yourself were in that setting, "Any theories?"
Seungmin gritted his teeth, "Multiple, actually, but I have read the books and that would be fair, would it kitty cat?"
You pouted at him and he laughed his devious laugh.
"You can go, if you need to," you told Seungmin, "I'll get some rest. Riya will probably be home soon for a few hours."
"No, I'll stay out of the goodness of my heart," Seungmin smirked.
You snorted, "Out of the goodness of your heart, or out of the goodness of wanting to steal something?"
"Maybe I'll take your bunny slippers. They're the only thing worth committing a crime in this dorm for," Seungmin mocked, the slippers you were currently wearing coming I'm intentionally violent contact with his leg.
"Seriously though, thank you for helping me. I wouldn't have expected it from someone who hates me," you said, not thinking much of it.
"I don't hate you," said Seungmin, and your worlds collided to come to a standstill.
Every perception you had for yourself was destroyed with the utterance of four words. I don't hate you. The walls you had built of rivalry and animosity, of surpassing him and opposing him came crashing down and burying you in rubble underneath.
If all you had worked towards was to dismantle the justification of Seungmin's fabricated hatred, and yet he never hated you in the first place, then what was the point? Does that mean that you were never truly doing any of this for yourself, and only because of him?
If he didn't exist, what would you be?
You realized that you were probably reading too much into it and let out a hollow, "I thought you did."
Seungmin shifted uncomfortably. "I'm sorry that I made you feel that way. I just considered you a worthy opponent that would help me improve myself. If anything, I respect you. In fact, these last few days have led me to see you as a friend."
You realized that it was time you apologized as well. "I'm really sorry too. I shouldn't have treated you so crossly."
Understanding and amusement flooded Seungmin's features. "No, please don't change. Bickering with you is one of the highlights of my day."
A smile tugged at your lips. "Okay, puppy boy. I'll go get some rest. What will you be doing?"
Seungmin winked at you. "Looking for things useful to steal, of course."
You lightly shoved his shoulder and he shook his head, shaking with laughter. Seungmin's hair bounced up and down as he laughed, pitifully, at his own joke.
You went to bed with a reducing migraine, a lighter heart and a new perception of you relationship with Kim Seungmin.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
As soon as your head hit the pillow, you were completely knocked out. When you woke, you felt weirdly feverish. You sighed bitterly, knowing that it would take you time to recover.
You walked out to the living room the check up on Seungmin. The sight which you found before you made you mentally melt into a puddle.
In front of you was a sleeping Kim Seungmin, legs brought to his chest and cheeks puffed out. His chest heaved rhythmically and small puffs of breath escaped his mouth. His hair covered his eyes and he was in the most compact position you had seen. You suppressed a snort.
You knew the kindest thing you could for him was to let him sleep. You knew the kindest thing you could do for yourself was to take pictures for blackmail material. Slipping your phone out of your back pocket, you quickly snapped a picture.
Foolishly, you forgot to turn off the flash and Seungmin stirred in his sleep. He got up with a start and blinked slowly. His eyes found yours and he blinked once more.
Then, with a slow smile, he said, "Hi."
If you thought you were a puddle before, you were now a stream rushing towards the ocean. "Hello."
Seungmin sprang up, "Feeling better?"
"Hm," you responded.
You watched as Seungmin made his way to the kitchen, shuffling with the cups you had inside your mildly messy cupboards. "I'll make coffee. Two sugars right?" he asked matter of factly.
"Yep," you replied in slight surprise, "It's crazy how you still remember. It's been... what, six weeks since your last student council coffee run?"
Seungmin's back was to you, mixing away the milk and coffee granules. "I remember everything about you."
You heart shouldn't have stuttered the way it did, and for once, you didn't try to stop it.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - three months.
"Han Jisung," you yelled into your phone, "I will kill you!"
Static emerged from the other side, but you could still make out Jisung's muffled giggle. "Y/N, bestie, bad bitch, my ride or die, just get cookies."
You hung up the phone call in irritation as Seungmin leaned against the window of the bus stop, observing you with a smile. You shot him a grimace which was poorly disguised as a smile, and he burst out into a fit of laughter.
"Cookies it is I guess," he snickered at your misfortune.
"We're splitting the bill," you announced haughtily, and you both walked side by side to the local grocery store.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
The cold air of the grocery store nipped at you, making its under your shirt and through your jeans. You rage towards a particular Han Jisung, however, propelled you towards the baked goods and sweets section. Seungmin tailed behind you, his hand holding on to your jacket sleeve.
The conquest in question was to get one of the people in your grade, Jisung, to help provide entertainment for the school prom. Him and two other seniors who had already passed out, Chan and Changbin, were part of a trio named 3racha. The entire school knew of their laurels; they had been signed to a famous company before even graduating high school.
Jisung told you to meet at their studio after school to discuss prom, assuring you that they would provide music and maybe even dj on the side. Right before you and Seungmin were going to leave however, he had the absolute audacity to tell you that his hyungs needed a lot of convincing.
You scanned all the decorative tin boxes, trying to pick out something cheap that would also suffice for the treacherous endeavor you were about to undertake. Sometime during this process, the familiar tug of Seungmin's hand on your sleeve vanished.
You surveyed the room to find where he was, like a mother looking for her son. When you finally spotted his familiar tuft of hair and tall frame, you let out a slightly fond and extremely exasperated sigh.
While you were actually working, Seungmin was busy waving two cones of ice cream towards you. You grabbed the box of cookies you were eyeing and walked towards him.
"Really, Seungmin?" you dryly questioned.
"I have an unnatural craving for butterscotch. If you don't let me have it, I'll go Edward Cullen on you," he retorted.
You seriously regretted persuading Seungmin into watching Twilight with you. Ever since the little sick spell you had which prompted Seungmin to spend time at your dorm, you both began a mini tradition of watching a movie together once every week.
You would play the movie on your respective laptops and call each other, listening on mute bar the occasional theoretical conversations and joint rants about the main character's absolute stupidity.
It all started when he began pestering you about table colors for the prom banquet ("but I don't see the difference between ivory and off-white!"), but you interrupted by saying that it movie night and that you were rewatching Interstellar. Both your movie preferences and haywire sleep schedules being very similar led to Seungmin asking you if he could watch as well.
The rest, as they say, was history.
You finally relented and you and Seungmin stepped out of the store with a split bill, a box of cookies under your arm and ice creams currently being devoured. You opted for Belgian Chocolate while Seungmin wolfed down butterscotch. You finished your ice creams and tossed your wrappers in the bin outside.
You noticed a spot of ice cream near Seungmin's lip. Without thinking anything of it, you pulled your sleeve and swiped at it, cleaning it in one go. Seungmin glanced at you with a mixture of awe, shock, and something you assumed was adoration.
"It's just ice cream," you mumbled, but the atmosphere of comfort and domesticity hit you just as much as it healed him.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
The two of you got on the bus and found two empty seats beside each other. After you vehemently listed the cons of sitting in an aisle seat, Seungmin finally conceded into letting you sit near the window. He didn't do so without insulting your height (again), claiming that since he was tall he would need to stretch his legs, but you wouldn't be having such issues at all.
The bus ride to the 3racha studio would take a good forty five minutes. Not because it was far, per se, but because traffic was a little shit.
You both were on your phones, and you scrolled aimlessly through social media. You let out a groan of annoyance.
"What is it?" asked Seungmin.
"Just Riya and Hyunjin being disgustingly adorable. Go ahead, take pleasure in my despair," you offered, full of snark.
"I mean, if you insist," Seungmin grinned.
Ever since Riya and Hyunjin's dramatic love confession and Victorian romance-esque scenario, you had been third wheeling to the point where you were third wheeling without even being near them. Hyunjin and Riya being in a relationship did make you crave one of your own, but you were kind of to not let an innocent victim (see also: Yang Jeongin) fall captive to the perils of being a third wheel.
You were drifting in and out of reality, immersed in a science fiction eBook loaded onto you phone. Or at least, you were, until animated video game noises came from Seungmin's phone. You peered over his shoulder to see what he was doing, and burst into a fit of stifled laughter.
"How can you be so bad at Fruit Ninja of all games," you giggled.
Seungmin glared at you, "As if you're any better."
"I am, in fact," you snorted, your tone full of invitation and open to challenge.
It took just those four words and the smug expression on your face for Seungmin to quickly switch to multiplayer mode. The two of you vigorously tapped at your screens, slicing watermelons and mangos. Seungmin swiping was so arbitrary that he couldn't even cut through a fruit half the time.
You shoulder was pressed against Seungmin's and your chin hovered over it. You thought you both were being soft enough so as to not disturb anyone, but an old woman sitting in front of you coughed in what you assumed was contempt.
Blood rushed to your cheeks in embarrassment as you and Seungmin both bowed apologetically. You were expecting a lengthy sermon on public discipline, but the old woman broke into a smile instead.
"Always cherish your childhood friendships and childhood loves," she winked at the two of you, "Especially when it seems to be a love as free as the one you both share."
You and Seungmin exchanged confused looks.
"We're not-"
"About that-"
You were tripping over your words, stumbling and falling until Seungmin finally mustered, "We're not dating, or in love or anything."
The woman just laughed in response. She got up from her chair and left with an "If you say so!", leaving both you and Seungmin stunned in her wake.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You and Seungmin sat cramped in the 3racha studio couch. You couldn't quite call this room a studio. It was more of a musically inclined man cave.
Jisung, Changbin and Chan sat across from you, their legs ridiculously crossed over the other at the exact same angles. Jisung nibbled on the cookies that you brought. He smiled at another one of your death glares.
Chan clapped his hands together, "You know what? We would love to play at your prom. Changbin and I are alumni and Jisung is bitchless anyways."
Jisung swatted at Chan's arm with his cookie while Changbin swooped in to claim a cookie of his own. Amidst the chaos, you and Seungmin let out a sigh of relief.
"You can send us the transaction details at our email," said Changbin, scribbling it on a notepad. His booming voice made you jump in surprise.
"Cool, we'll do that soon. Before we go, can I use the restroom?" Seungmin inquired.
Chan rattled off the directions to the restroom and Seungmin left with a pat on your head and a "Don't miss me too much, darling."
"We'll get back to work now, Y/N," Chan said kindly.
You shot him a smile which remained on your face until Changbin snickered, "Yeah, Jisung can keep you company."
The two of them went inside their studio booth, erupting with giggles that turned into fake coughs which once again morphed into real coughs. You shot Jisung a quizzical look. "Oh, that's because I used to like you," Jisung said through a mouthful of cookie.
You weren't taken aback, unfazed by his sudden admission. Jisung has had a crush on almost the entire student body, regardless of gender. You would be kidding if you said that you didn't have a soft spot for Jisung though. He was your seatmate in chemistry class (a horrible one at that), but also the reason why you ran for student council president in the first place.
"You would be good at it," he encouraged you, even though you knew his ulterior motives.
You were presently reaching for a cookie when Jisung stated casually, "I didn't know you were dating Seungmin."
You choked on your cookie. "What? We aren't. Why would you think that?"
There was no way in hell you and Seungmin could ever be mixed up for a couple. Yes, your feelings of hatred towards him had considerably dampened, but that didn't mean that you liked liked him. Everything you felt towards him was strictly professional and only had to do with prom planning, as you would regularly reassure yourself.
Jisung shrugged. "The nicknames, the looks you were giving each other. I mean, you both are alike. It wouldn't be that out of the blue of you were."
You responded with a huff of indignation, assuming that this was Jisung's way of asking you if you were single.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
"We are not watching Twilight," you told Seungmin sternly. He pouted at you but you wouldn't budge, not even an inch.
Seungmin and you were back on the bus, the sky painted in beautiful shades of blue. The bus was quiet, you and Seungmin being the only passengers on there. Deciding to kill time because evening traffic would cause the bus to take even longer, Seungmin suggested watching something on his tablet.
"Let's watch the Vampire Diaries instead!" Seungmin said in excitement.
You stared at him, mouth agape. "What is it with you and vampires?"
"It's either that or Mean Girls," Seungmin offered.
You instantly knew what you would watch. Suffering through Seungmin watching Mean Girls and adopting Regina George's personality would be pure agony. There were many things you could tolerate in life, but Seungmin taking up the persona of his favorite characters after watching something knew was not one of them. Knowing Seungmin, you didn't have a shred of doubt that his favorite would be Regina.
"Vampire Diaries it is," you agreed, "But Damone is mine."
Seungmin offered no objection and handed you one side of his wired earphones. You had to sit in extremely close proximity to Seungmin, close enough that you could feel his breath on your cheek. Your head subconsciously dropped on his shoulder, his cheek pressed against your hair.
Seungmin smelled like cinnamon and rain. You wondered what perfume he used, but then realized that it would be pointless since any and all perfume would have worn out by then. After that you began to ponder about what Disney movie he had stepped out of to smell so good and look so good despite spending hours either outside or in a cramped studio.
Finally, your train of thought took a sharp, final turn.
You were comfortable, pressed up against Seungmin and making sarcastic comments every so often. It felt normal, natural even. It struck you that your head fit under Seungmin's chin like a missing puzzle piece.
The pieces of your brain and the pieces of his heart joined together to form a beautiful mosaic of shared chaos and resilience that was unique only to the odd relationship you both shared.
Maybe it wasn't so absurd that two people had assumed that you both were in a relationship. Maybe you didn't want it to be so absurd. Maybe you wanted it to be something that wouldn't cause you and Seungmin to dismiss with hurried explanations and laughs full of ridicule.
That was enough thinking for today.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
[10:17 PM]
puppy boy: i have come here to tell you that i am willing to risk our friendship
[10:18 PM]
You: /what/ friendship?
[10:18 PM]
puppy boy: fine, i'm willing to risk out not friendship for claiming damone salvatore
puppy boy: talk to hand if you have any arguments
puppy boy: ✋🏻
[10:19 PM]
You: lmao not you acting like damone would choose *you* over *me*
[10:19 PM]
puppy boy: ...
puppy boy: ok well i can't rly argue with that
puppy boy: if i was damone, i would choose you in a heartbeat
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - two months and twenty six days.
The most fascinating thing that you had studied about in your astronomy class were binary stars. They were the most common multi star system, found regularly in pockets of the universe. They were immensely important, aiding in the calculation of things like mass of celestial bodies.
But one could not exist without the other.
A binary star was useless without it's counterpart, just another ball of glowing gas drifting about in the universe. You reckoned that humans also had their version of binary stars, people whose lives were so intertwined with each other that having one without the other stripped both entities of their meaning.
In astronomy, they were called binary stars. On earth, they were called soulmates.
That was what you and Seungmin were, stars that shone brightly in your shared skies but instead of dimming the other, only amplified it. You both were natural satellites, celestial bodies gravitating into each other's pull like a two magnets.
Seungmin drew you in like nobody else did, and you were tired of repelling it. If the earth had reversed it's poles so many times in the past, then in the grand scheme of things, you reversing your perception of Seungmin should have been nothing that would warrant a big deal.
But to you, this was your entire perception of a black and white reality being ripped away and slowly rebuilt in color.
Considering that the person behind all of it was Seungmin, these colors were more often than not so vivid and vibrant that it left you craving more of what life could be like if he would be there mending every crack in your universe.
It left you craving more of what life could be like if the term my universe in your dictionary changed to our universe.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You and Seungmin were sitting together in the library. Well, less sitting together and more having a habit of happening to be there at the same time (which was almost all the time). This caused you both to strike up a habit of unknowingly taking a seat beside the other person.
Seungmin was leafing through a book while you silently observed him. "What is it?" he piped up, his eyes never leaving his book, "What do you want to ask me?"
You placed a finger between the pages of the book you were reading and shrugged. "Nothing much, really. How did you know I was wondering about something anyways?"
He looked up, his eyes meeting yours. "I just know. Now, what is it?"
His impatient gaze and curious eyes tempted you into telling him what was making rounds in your head. You found yourself thinking for the umpteenth time how his hair fell into his face so perfectly, making him a vision that seemed like a painting encased in a Parisian museum.
"Your eyes," you whispered, your tone so imperceptible that a another human being would have barely heard you.
Seungmin always heard your voice, though.
"What about them?" he chuckled.
You titled your head to the side, wondering if you yourself were imagining all of this. "Did you know your eyes change color when you look at me?"
It was true, at least to you. You noticed that whenever Seungmin's gaze caught onto yours, his eyes darkened. Not in the terrifying way often associated with bloodlust, but in the puzzled way that made you feel like he was trying to figure you out, just as you were trying to figure yourself out.
"It's just a telling sign for my animosity towards you," taunted Seungmin, attempting to ignite a fiery response out of you.
It somewhat mildly worked.
"Oh yeah," you gasped, "Ello will be troubled to know that her parents are fighting.
"Hm," contemplated Seungmin, "Who's gonna be the one to tell her that she's a child of divorce?"
Seungmin's comment caught you off guard. Child of divorce? It was so out of pocket that even the tantalizing curve of your lips that had been making you feel unnatural things as of late couldn't distract you.
"We aren't even married, Seungmin," you pointed out.
In response, Seungmin put his book down on the table in front of him. He placed his elbow on the aforementioned table and smoothly removed one of the two rings that he was always wearing: the smaller moon ring to his larger sun ring, you noticed.
He motioned for your hand and in one gesture, slid the moon ring onto your ring finger. "There," he declared proudly, "Now we're married."
He seemed so casual, so unfazed about it, that it enraged you.
Did he not just feel like an entire carton box of fireworks had gone off in an empty parking lot that was his stomach? Did he not get his breath taken away from a gesture that was so simple that a passerby wouldn't even have batted an eye at it? Did he not feel perplexed, terrified and astonished that such a feeling was even possible?
Because you did.
You felt like your world was tilting on it's axis and you couldn't keep letting the lava simmer under the surface anymore.
It felt like the entire universe was in your grasp, like electricity crackled at your fingertips. You felt euphoric, your brain buzzing and mind spinning.
You felt like someone shattered the vase of feelings that contained all you had ever experienced and glued it back together with gold in its cracks. You felt like someone placed rose-tinted sunglasses on your eyes and that you never wanted to go back to normal vision after gaining a taste of what this felt like.
You knew that what you felt was, according to the countless books and movies you had watched, a horrible illness that constituted a crush. But you didn't know that it felt so good? Even more frighteningly so, you didn't know when you stopped seeing Seungmin as a rival and as a friend.
You frighteningly didn't know when you started seeing Seungmin as someone you were capable of loving until you did and it scared you to death concretely only knowing that your brain provided not a single fucking objection to this flurry of feelings.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - two months.
In the time that you had come to the realization that you had feelings for Seungmin, and all the moments post that day, you were in a tumultuous state of mind.
You hadn't told anyone about your feelings, because you weren't sure if they were genuine or if they were a product of you romanticizing the entire atmosphere surrounding you.
You would be so cruel to Seungmin before a few months ago, so neglectful of his feelings that you thought it was foolish to think that he would ever like. It baffled you that he even saw you as a friend; hoping that he would see you as a lover would be akin to grasping for non-existent straws.
You should have told Hyunjin, who viewed love so beautifully that you envied him for it. You should have talked to Jeongin, who didn't see love as poetically as Hyunjin, but had so much of it to spare and never seemed to run out. But you didn't.
Instead, you chose to exist in torturous turmoil, over thinking each and every shared moment you had with Seungmin. If this was what experiencing supposedly unrequited like was going to be for the rest of your life, you sincerely hoped you never went through the pain of it again.
If this was what experiencing supposedly unrequited like was going to be for the rest of your life, you sincerely hoped it didn't become unrequited love.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
"And we'll have to meet Felix for his cousin, you know, Lee Minho, who said he'll be open to catering for prom," you finished with an air of finality.
Seungmin bobbed his head in agreement and walked with you towards you locker. He stepped normally, slowing down to keep pace with you. You felt like your legs were lead.
Being near Seungmin made you simultaneously want to combust and make you want to fly.
You reached for you locker and twisted the knob according to your combination, as you did almost everyday. This was like second nature to you, so when you opened you locker, put your books inside and turned around with the intention of facing Seungmin, you certainly weren't expecting what you were met with instead.
Renjun, one of the students of your grade, stood facing you with a bouquet. You had spoken with Renjun a few times at most, striking up conversation very rarely. You had no idea what warranted him looking at you earnestly, hoping that he was waiting for someone else.
Of course you were wrong.
"Hey Y/N, um... I have liked you for a very long time and I wanted to ask if you would go to prom with me," Renjun stuttered.
To say you were in shock was an understatement. Dating was the furthest thing from your mind, regardless of whether or not you had feelings for anyone, Seungmin included. While you did feel a surge of ego at being asked out for prom, you weren't in any way, shape, or form, expecting it.
This also meant that you weren't prepared for what you were going to do if you wanted to accept a promposal, which in turn meant you had even less of an idea of what to do if your intention was to reject a promposal.
You instantly felt pity on him and remorseful for what you were about to do.
"Oh Renjun, I'm really sorry but I barely know you. On top of that, I'll be really busy with student council and just be the reason your night to be ruined," you told him softly.
Renjun looked at you crestfallen. "Oh yeah, no, you're right. I'm sorry for bothering you. Can we grab coffee sometime though?"
Before you could respond, Seungmin interjected. "Yes, yes, that's all nice but we have to go. People to see, places to be. Just text her when and where."
With that, Seungmin dragged you away. You wanted to protest but were internally cartwheeling instead.
It was probably your imagination, probably caffeinated emotions, but you thought you saw a flash of jealousy in Seungmin's charming eyes.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
"What was that about?" you snorted.
"That was me having to be inconvenienced because my partner doesn't know how to respond when a guy asks her out," Seungmin snapped.
Not friend. No colleague or co-president. Not even your name. But partner.
You weren't sure how to feel about that.
"Why do you hate prom so much Seungmin?" you sighed, changing the topic.
Seungmin shrugged in response but you pressed on. "It's okay puppy. No matter how embarrassing, I won't judge."
You crossed your fingers over your heart, but Seungmin just looked at you with melancholy in his eyes. Your teasing smile fell.
"It's a long story," Seungmin said. His hands were in his pocket and he was kicking at a rock on the pavement.
"It's okay, you don't have to tell me," you told him, your voice full of guilt for asking.
"No, I will," he responded, "You deserve that much."
Seungmin finally began, "You know how I have an older sister, right? She's in college right now, but back when she was in high school, she was really smart. Smarter then me smart. I know right. Crazy? Anyways, she was very much type casted as a nerd and even though she was well liked, nobody wanted to date her. That was, until, prom came around. A guy asked her out and she was over the moon."
You felt a sinking feeling in your stomach, knowing where this was about to go.
"She wasn't even romantically interested in him, but was so excited that someone had for once, shown some interest towards her that she instantly said yes. I still remember how she wouldn't stop talking about it. She got ready, buying her own dress and everything, using money from her part time job that she was saving for university. She looked ethereal that night. I still remember all of it, even if it was five years ago. But she was stood up. Turns out the entire was a dare, a sick joke. Her final straw was when she saw the guy who asked her out walk into the prom venue with another girl on his arm."
Your heart broke for Seungmin's sister. You couldn't even imagine how it must have felt. Just when you thought it couldn't get worse, however, Seungmin opened his mouth once again.
He continues bitterly, "She was so heartbroken that she went to one of those afterparties, that's basically a rave. She drank so much alcohol that it got to the point where she was passed out on someone's hospital. We had to rush her to the hospital and get all of it pumped out. It felt so painful, being thirteen and watching my sister just suffer in pure agony."
Seungmin's voice broke, "She almost died last night, physically. But mentally, she was wrecked. It was on her hospital records, this incident. None of the Ivies, or any university even remotely good accepted her. She finally got into Stanford, but that was after writing several scholarship tests and paying a hefty fee. She's never really been the same since."
When Seungmin's sermon came to an end, you felt his hurt ten times over. Tears glistened in his eyes and without warning, you pulled him in for a hug. You felt Seungmin let out a shaky breath and held him close.
"Your hair smells like strawberries. It's highly concerning. Fruit based shampoos are dumb," he mumbled into your hair.
"Shut up and stop ruining the moment or else I'll let go," you warned.
In response, Seungmin just held you tighter. When he let go, he swiped at his eyes and gave you a grateful smile. "Sorry. And thank you," he told you with a tight smile.
You just nodded in response. "Hey, I understand why you hate prom. I can take over for you on the actual night," you offered with a squeeze of his hand."
Seungmin shook his head in response, "No, I'll be there. It wouldn't be fair to all of you if I wasn't. But you should go with Renjun. Being tethered to someone who has an outlook like me would just make the night boring as hell for you."
The possibility of going to prom with Renjun when Seungmin was right there was something you found utterly ridiculous. It made no sense, no sense at all to go with someone you had no feelings for. Going to prom with Renjun would hurt both him and you.
Seungmin's glazed expression sent an arrow straight into your heart, piercing and deafening. You refused to let him drown in sorrow. "Absolutely not, Kim Seungmin. If I said you're coming to prom with me, you're coming to prom with me."
You didn't allow any room for further argument, shutting Seungmin up with a defiant stare. You wanted Seungmin to enjoy prom, you truly did. But you knew that this wasn't the complete truth. You had a much more selfish, concealed motive.
You were going to make Kim Seungmin fall in love with prom, while falling in love with you as well.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - one month and three days.
[9:06 PM]
You: oi seungmin
You: we still meeting up at the library to wrap up all the finally details?
[9:07 PM]
seungmine (hopefully someday): Yep.
You could somehow tell that something was bothering Seungmin, just by reading that last text. You caught your lip between your teeth as you got ready to go to the library, his dry tone throwing you off. Seungmin was pretty much a dry texter, but always followed it up with something absurd. Today however, he didn't. Hell, he even used proper punctuation.
The entirety of the mini 'meeting' that you had consisted of only you talking and Seungmin responding with one or two words. If you were lucky, he would look your way, but your luck mostly fell short.
You snapped your binder shut and asked, "Everything good?"
Seungmin just blinked in response, the boredom and sense of being done evident in his eyes. He didn't reply and instead proceeded to swing his bag around his shoulder and stand up.
You tried once again. "I was going to go shopping for prom dresses. Do you want to match colors? Let me know what you plan on wearing."
Seungmin spared you a half glance. "Yeah sure, wear whatever. I don't really care."
You felt tears prick in his eyes. How could he just not care? You were willing to give up fun and sacrifice romance so that Seungmin could have someone to spend time with. You were doing all this and for what? Being told that he didn't care?
You felt so heavy that you spit out, "You know what? Fine. I wanted to go to prom with you so that you would have someone to be with. I knew, I knew that we would have to be stuck together all night, socializing and making sure nobody burns the school down or spikes the punch bowl. But that doesn't mean that I don't want prom to feel authentic, to go as a normal teenager."
You continued, "I'm not even asking you for the grand promposal that I have been dreaming about since I was nine. I'm just asking you to do the bare minimum, if not as my prom date, which you agreed to might I add, but at least as the person who I share the title of co-president with. You cannot keep disregarding my feelings Seungmin. I'm sick and tired of it. I understand that you hate prom but it's you who keeps insisting on coming, it's you who keeps saying that it won't be fair if you aren't there which is ironic, because you most definitely aren't being fair right now."
Seungmin stared at you, jaw slightly hung open, but the fire inside you kept raging.
"I know you don't see me as a date and that's fine but at least show me some modicum of respect. You didn't even let me complete my question; it wasn't me asking about matching prom attire. It was Principal Kim who suggested asking you about it. And you know that a suggestion from her is nothing short of law."
The tears in your eyes were threatening to spill out now as you mentally cursed yourself for ever even thinking that you could have feelings for someone like him.
"So, Kim Seungmin, if you don't want to go prom, or if you want to be a whiny little bitch about it, it's fine with me. Text me if you're going. If you won't, I'll just assume you aren't. You can do whatever the fuck you want because I'm sick for pitying you when you clearly aren't deserving of it. Go ahead and fucking ruin prom for yourself, but don't you dare tarnish the experience for me."
Before Seungmin could even anything, you grabbed your backpack and walked away, blinking back tears as you thought about how cold and lonely prom would be without anybody by your side to spend the night with. Hyunjin had Riya. Jeongin had a roster of senior girls willing to go out with him.
But you? At the end of the day, every single day, you were all alone. You let your intrusive thoughts in, swirling in your head and nearly paralyzing your capacity to think.
What if the reason why you were alone was all your fault? What if you were too pushy, too rude for your own good? None of that mattered, though, because thinking about the situation never changed the situation.
You would be alone, no matter how hard you tried otherwise, and that was the bitter truth you had to learn to live with.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
[5:28 PM]
Kim Seungmin: i am so sorry y/n
Kim Seungmin: please answer my calls
[6:36 PM]
You: I have sent the details regarding the electronic equipment.
You: Make sure to contact them.
[6:36 PM]
Kim Seungmin: please let me make it up to you.
Kim Seungmin: please.
[7:05 PM]
You: Let me know once you contact them.
You: Don't bother texting me otherwise.
You: My phone will be on dnd since I'm going out.
You: Call me only if it's urgent. I think you should be more than capable of handling the situation now, but just in case. Don't expect me to respond to you about anything else.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You were avoiding Seungmin as if he carried a deadly virus. You dodged him in hallways and expertly deflected any and all of his attempts to talk to you. The one place you couldn't avoid where you knew he would be, however, was the library.
You needed to return one of your library books. Today was the last day and not doing so would led to you paying a fine. You couldn't afford a payable fees right now, since most of the savings from your part time job and the money your parents would regularly send you would be going towards buying your prom gown.
Okay, fine. Maybe you wanted to give Seungmin a chance to properly apologize. But that's absurd and not important right now.
Your headphones were jammed in your ears, music pounding through them while you walked in its direction. People thought that you had an affinity for listening to classical music since you came under the categorization of an 'over-achieving nerd.'
You knew that society also known as your school, would break out into scandal if they ever found out that Kendrick Lamar was your top artist on Spotify.
That thought brought you back to Seungmin, as you giggled at the memory of his confusion while you were explaining the entire Drake and Kendrick beef to him. His nose was scrunched up and his eyes were squinted, listening to you as if you were preaching about the secrets of life and the universe, not ranting about rap music.
Oh wait. You were supposed to hate Seungmin. Not giggle at the memories of the time you spent together like a middle aged woman recounting her college days.
When you got to the library, you placed your bag on Mrs. Kang's table and took out the book you were supposed to return.
You handed it to her with a strained smile. "Hey, I am on time though, aren't I Mrs. Kang? Plus, this is just a first time offence. I'm sure you can let it slide."
Mrs. Kang raised her eyebrow. "Fine, just this once," she slid the book underneath the scanner and mentioned, "Oh, you should go check out the Romantic Literature section; we finally got sent The Vicar of Wakefield."
You looked at her, puzzled. You were never really interested in works that emerged during the age of early eighteenth century Romanticism. She must have mixed you up with somebody else, but you began to walk towards the shelves anyways. If anything would help lighten your spirits, it would be re-reading Pride and Prejudice.
When you got there however, the most unexpected sight awaited you.
Your eyes drank in the sight of Seungmin, standing wearing a varsity jacket, white t-shirt and jeans. Dried rose petals littered the length of the aisle. Seungmin was holding up an open book with it's pages folded to form the word 'Prom?'
As much as you hated to admit it, the sight took your breath away.
Seungmin cocked his head to the side. "I had to bribe her with my limited edition copy of Frankenstein."
"What- what is this?" you asked, your brain still numb from shock.
Seungmin bit his lip and looked at you. "This is me apologizing. You were right. I completely sidelined you when I shouldn't have. I truly respect and admire you and feel horrible that I made you feel like this. And I figured, that I should ask you to prom the way you deserve: with all the grandeur in the world."
His apology was one that you could have never imagined being the recipient of. Even fiction didn't predict something as thoughtful as this. Seungmin preparing an entire promposal for you, over just a hissy fit, was enough to thaw your temporarily frozen heart.
You looked at him open-mouthed. "But I thought you didn't even like me that way."
Despite how hard he tried to contain it, tones of mischief slipped through Seungmin's voice. "Would it be so bad if I did?"
What? This couldn't be real. This was most definitely not happening. You pinched yourself to make sure you weren't dreaming, because never in your wildest dreams would such a scene have ever taken place.
Seungmin must have somehow read your mind because he quickly stuttered, "Not that I do. I mean I like you. But not in that way. Like, I asked you since we have to spend the entire night together anyways. I'm sorry for making this weird."
You let out an exhale, chiding yourself for being so gullible. It was just Seungmin being Seungmin. You spared a glance at his eyes, full of anticipation. You wanted to say no. If you didn't, you knew you would be in too deep.
You took a step forward to refuse his request when your eyes fell on his hand. The sight awaiting you knocked the wind out of your body.
You already noticed Seungmin's baggy eyes, attributing it to lack of sleep because he was busy doing whatever guys do. But his hands told the other half of the story.
They were adorned with paper cuts. Small scars like moons were imprinted on him in various stages of healing. One even had a bit of blood on it.
"Uh, yeah," said Seungmin, noticing your eyes drift down, "I spent all night making it. Let's just say that I'm really bad with paper and folding in any context and leave it at that."
"Seungmin," you whispered, your eyes tearing up. He offered you a tight smile.
"I should go. This was weird. I'm sorry."
"Wait!" you said in a tone that startled him, "I'll go. I'll go to prom with you. Officially."
Seungmin's eyes reflected a question of whether you were doing this genuinely. You hoped that your eyes reflected that you were. Seungmin may not ever come to like you romantically, in any sense. But you were happy with what you were being offered.
You were happy that Seungmin was the first person you thought yourself to have the potential to love.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - shit, it's prom!
You couldn't sleep all night.
The frenzied prolepsis that clouded your mind refused to escape. 'What if's?' and 'Should have's?' regarding the event clouded your head. You thought that you would feel more nervous about your experience at prom, but it was all the planning that got to your head.
If you were a wreck, however, then Seungmin was a fucking natural disaster.
He texted you without pause, your phone blowing up so much that even Riya had to ask you if everything was okay. His chats varied, from long rants about how Die Hard is not a Christmas movie, despite Felix's apparent protests, and immense worry about how prom would turn out.
You didn't blame him. You were just as anxious as him, even if you weren't as vocal about it. This mammoth event was like yours's and Seungmin's baby. You were so concentrated on making sure that everything went according to plan, that the idea of you going to prom with Seungmin was pushed to the dark and dusty corner of your brain.
"You have been texting Seungmin a lot lately," teased Riya as she curled her hair.
"Shut up," you told her smoothly, already armed with blackmail material, "Or else I will smack you and tell Hyunjin about your Shah Rukh Khan shrine."
She effortlessly shut up.
You ran from one room to the other, your dorm house common room and back, pacing and placing calls and confirming and reminding people of what had to be done. You were in such a rush that you hadn't even started to get ready.
In your panicked chaos, you slammed into an already ready Felix. His white suit was immaculate, small roses embroidered on the sides. His blond hair was tousled and his easy smile gave you a bit of reassurance amidst the hectic situations you were constantly throwing yourself in.
"Felix! What are you doing here? You look amazing, by the way." You pulled him in for a quick hug, distracted by a call you had to make.
"I'm here to pick up my date, Jeongin," Felix smirked.
You let out a cough. "What?"
Felix laughed. "I didn't have a date and thought that he deserves to come since he has helped so much. So, I offered him my plus one ticket."
Ah, that made sense. You wondered why Jeongin didn't go with one of the senior girls on his roster of ladies in waiting. Then you remembered that he thought of himself as some sort of a chivalrous gentleman.
"Why haven't you gotten ready yet?" Felix questioned.
"Oh, I was just-," you began, before Felix sternly interrupted you.
"Don't you dare say you were wrapping things up. You and I both know that your definition of wrapping things up is frantically quadruple checking everything," Felix scolded, "You will stop worrying and get ready."
You just sighed in response, "I wish I could but-"
"No buts," he said, his eyes softening. "This night is yours as much as everybody else's. If anything, it's mostly yours."
Before you could sweetly respond to Felix with a resounding refusal, Jisung, per usual, appeared out of thin hair. His suit coat looked a little small and you vaguely remembered yearbook pictures of Chan during his prom, wearing almost the exact same suit coat, minus the little hand stitched lightening bolt on the side pocket.
"This," Jisung motioned towards you with a flourish of his right hand, "Is unacceptable."
Felix promptly agreed. You flashed him a withering glare and he slightly wavered, but it was of no use. You had lost the battle before it had even begun.
Twenty minutes later, you, Jisung and Felix were in your dorm room. No matter your protests, they insisted on helping you get ready for prom night. The two of them did your hair and makeup while you pondered on how you couldn't do it yourself half as good as they did.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
When they were done, you gasped in surprise. They made you look a beautiful you thought you weren't capable of outwardly being.
Your dress in itself was majestic, at least in your eyes. It didn't exactly fit the theme, but the moment you saw it, you knew you needed to have it. It marveled you to no end about how someone could leave something that looked so incredible in a small thrift store next to the coffee shop you frequented.
The dress was silver, shimmering in a shade of what you only knew to be 'almost white' when light struck it. The bodice was in the shape of fairy wings, the sides laced crisscrossed and showing the smallest bit of skin. The back was covered, and the dress flowed down to reach your feet like a cascading waterfall. It was sleeveless, and so you wore long, winding silver bracelets on each hand.
Your make was done almost professionally by Felix. He used a colour pallet of silvery white, not exaggerating your make up. He brushed your hair calmly and tied two strands of it in a braid, pull them back to make a sort of halo. Felix clipped butterflies into your hair and made you feel like a mythical creature stepping out from a fantasy novel. Narnia, maybe.
Jisung on the other hand, provided food, gossip and entertainment. You would never reveal this to him, but you found that very vital to the process of getting ready as well.
"You are so good at this," you gushed at Felix.
He looked at you calmly. "I have two sisters, and I'm the middle kid. As a consequence, I was often my older sister's model for all things fashion and my younger sister's personal stylist."
Jisung munched on a piece of cake which you had no idea was even there in your kitchen. He sat on a barstool and clapped when you came out and gave him a spin. His feet rocked back and forth while he cheered you on.
"See," he said to Felix pointedly. "I am a better wingman than you."
Felix looked immeasurably hurt. "Not as good as me though. You didn't even help me!"
"I did, didn't I?" Jisung looked at you with those boba eyes that you found extremely hard to resist.
In response, you ushered them both out of the house in order to not get pulled into conflict and be the cause of an unsatisfactory prom night. Plus, you wanted to get there early and check on the venue.
Well, that and also to (mostly), see Seungmin.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You spotted him before he could see you.
Seungmin looked ethereal in his silver suit, his hair swept to the side and hands in his pockets as he engaged in easy conversation with one of the teachers.
He looked like a song you could listen to for the rest of your life until you were maddened by it but never turn it off. He looked like a painting that you could stare at as it dried, like a work of art you spend countless hours and dollars just to catch a glimpse.
And, he matched with you.
When you mentioned to him in passing that your prom dress was silver in colour, you hadn't actually expected him to wear something of a similar, much less the same colour. And yet he did, and you went down a spiral of feelings once again.
Seungmin's eyes must have found you because he sauntered over to you like a man with a purpose.
"You look beautiful," he whispered in awe, "But then again, you do everyday."
You blushed, hoping that the shitty lighting would hide it. "You look incredible yourself Seungmin," you said lightly, "And you somehow look good everyday, despite only running off of caffeine and spite.
Seungmin threw his head back an infectious laughter that had caused you to laugh as well. Someone called his name from the background in the middle of your laughter. Another louder, more insistent call of his name floated towards your general direction. Seungmin dipped his head in apology and walked away.
He had told you that you look beautiful. Not your dress, not your make up, not your hair. Not the meaningless, material attire that clung onto you like tinsel on a Christmas. But he said that you, you, look beautiful.
Seungmin wasn't looking you up and down when he said so, like men in the movies did. He didn't look like he was trying to memorize your body, memorize the dips and curves where he could place his hand and mold his being into yours.
No, he looked you in the eye when he said at, as if he didn't believe that it was the clothes that made you look beautiful. He looked you in the eye as if everything that made you, well, you was what made you so beautiful in his sight.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You stood in a moment of peace, finally standing still since reaching the venue.
The moment you took a deep breath and closed your eyes, however, a guttural screech and the sound of howling teenage boys flooded your ears. Sighing in irritation, you opened one eye to asses the situation. Deciding that it warranted you opening the other eye as well, you walked over to the culprits and sternly told them off.
You probably jinxed any peace that would possibly be coming your way by stealing away those five minutes for yourself.
Bad karma, bad decisions.
Seungmin was watching the entire altercation with a faint smirk. He walked over to you and tapped you on the shoulder. You didn't know it was him, and were about to tell him off as well until his familiar scent reached you.
You glared at the gaggle of seniors who has no right to be called seniors and turned to Seungmin.
"May I please have this dance?" he asked with a smirk.
You raised an eyebrow at him and placed your hand in his. "The theme is Aphrodite's Garden, not 18th century Regency era Bridgerton," you quipped.
Seungmin was subject to torture at your hands, also known as, watching Bridgerton with you. He would never admit it, but you knew he liked it. In fact, he may have even enjoyed it more than you. Either that, or you were hallucinating him being on his Simone Ashley Twitter fan account.
Your arms went around his neck as Seungmin guided you to the dancefloor. "I can't really dance," you murmured, the close contact between you both making your head go haywire.
"Neither do I," he winked.
Seungmin's eyes bored into yours and you licked your lips self-consciously. Considering you incredible luck, the song was slow and sensual. Considering your incredible luck, less than twenty seconds into the song playing, a loud crashing sound was heard in the background.
You prayed to God to help salvage prom, and no, that god was not Taylor Swift.
"I'll handle it," Seungmin reassured you.
"I'm a big girl," you bristled, "I can handle it as well."
"I know you are," Seungmin mused, "But I also know you well enough to know that those heels are absolutely killing you right now."
You pressed your lips in a thin line. No matter your feelings for Kim Seungmin, you still hated when he was right. You flashed him the tiniest smile in a way of saying 'thank you', since you were too proud to actually do it. He took it in stride and went away to handle whatever it was that needed handling at the moment.
He left you alone with your thoughts if such situations weren't confined so momentarily and were instead something you could enjoy for eternity.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You decided to step out of the venue for a bit, to finally clear you head. The atmosphere of prom buzzed with electricity and it wasn't the good, energetic kind; it was more of the kind that made your hair frizz.
You were standing, staring at the stars when you felt the air shift beside you. You knew who it was even without sparing a glance at them.
"The stars are beautiful tonight," you whispered to him.
"They are, but I have seen sights today that even rival them," Seungmin said. His voice was missing his trademark sass.
Your heart thumped incessantly as you asked, "Trying out cheesy pick up lines on me now, are we?"
Seungmin laughed, "Now would that be so bad?"
You both stood in silence. You bent down, opened your heels and set them to the side. You felt Seungmin looking at you, but you kept looking at the sky.
The sky, which was ever changing, yet reflected the same shades everyday. The sky, that served as a medium of rain and thunder, sunlight and rainbows. The sky, that was always there in you life, unwavering and never faltering.
Sky, which was coincidentally Seungmin's English name. It suited him.
"I really like the constellation of Orion," you told him with a sideways glance.
"I know. I remember."
"How? I mean, how do you remember all this?"
"I remember everything you tell me," Seungmin repeated, like he did all those months ago.
"Why?" you asked. You asked because you wanted to know, needed to know and repent your mistake of not asking earlier.
Seungmin turned to face you. His eyes held no glint of mischief, no edge accompanied by teasing. Instead, you felt locked in his gaze. It was the kind of intense stare that made you think that he was about to spill all his sins at your feet, right here, right now.
"I remember everything because it's you who says it. I used to remember because I wanted to beat you, be better than you. Then I started to remember as a habit, noticing the smallest quirks about you. Now I remember because I want to be there for you, to help you."
This wasn't happening. This wasn't real. But how much longer would you say that to yourself until you were imbibed with it?
"There is an ugly mix of feelings inside me regarding you, Y/N. They went initially from animosity, to something akin to friendship, to now, the desire for something with you that's more than just platonic."
He gulped. You swallowed. Silence.
"I am drawn to you, Y/N L/N. From the moment I have met you, it has felt like my life is irreversibly tangled with yours. I am propelled towards like it's pre-destined, and I always have. There are times where I feel like I cannot exist if you do not exist. And I'm tired of brushing these feelings aside, acting like they're non-existent."
"I like you, and not telling you has quite nearly driven me to the brink of insanity. It's alright, if you don't feel the same, but please don't walk away without an answer for me."
His gaze averted yours when he finally finished. You looked at him in awe, unable to express how you felt his brilliance radiate off him when he perfectly articulated all the feelings that restlessly capsized land in the empty spaces of your mind.
"For someone really smart, Kim," you breathed, "You are extremely stupid."
"You mean..." Seungmin's voice trailed off. Now it was his turn to look at you in awe.
"I have the feeling that you're trying not to kiss me, and I give you permission to just do it," you announced.
Seungmin gave you a wild smile before his lips swooped in to meet yours. They tasted like fruit punch and chocolate cake, like promises and forever.
You might have been imagining it, but for one cosmic moment, it felt like the stars were shining brighter than the usually did. Two binary stars had finally found each other, finally made their way into each other's orbits, never to stray again.
His lips left yours with a small gasp. "That was my first kiss," you mumbled sheepishly.
Seungmin fiddled with the flaps of his suit coat nervously. He started babbling, "Really? This was, I think, my third. Once at camp and once last year but that was just spin the bottle-"
You cut him off with a smirk. "Let's make it a fourth time, shall we?" and you promptly shut him up by placing your lips on his.
You weren't jealous of the other people Seungmin had kissed. God knows how awful this entire experience would have been if you both were going into it as novices. If anything, you were glad you were the third person he was kissing, because in that celestial moment, you made a vow.
You may not be the first person Seungmin had kissed, but you would make damn well sure to be the last.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
t - girl, it's the epilogue!
Seungmin yawned and wrapped his arm around your waist, practically caging you to the bed. He let out whine when you tried to get out of his grasp and just pulled you closer. You poked him in the side until he yelped.
"Kim Seungmin, you are not skipping work today. I know this display of affections is just so that I concede and let you stay home for cuddles," you told him sternly.
"But it worked last time. And the time before that. And the time before-"
"Well, it won't work this time," you announced with an air of finality.
If anything, being in a relationship with Seungmin only increased the penchant for banter you both had. You both rarely disagreed on things, but went back and forth for fun anyways. You knew your boundaries and never crossed them, but argued like cats and dogs nonetheless.
Well, you called it arguing. Seungmin called it flirting.
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
You both finally pulled up at Seungmin's workplace and you snorted when you saw the building gates. Seungmin drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and looked at you with a smile that you gave back. It was his first day on the job as Principal.
It had been ten years since you stepped foot on the campus of Park Academy.
"The legacy of Principal Kims continues," you giggled, proud of yourself for making that joke.
"That's because Kims are superior," Seungmin declared.
"That is literally so offensive," you flicked him arm lightly.
Seungmin's eyes met yours and a familiar look in it made you outwardly dread and inwardly prepare to rebut whatever he was going to tell you.
"You shouldn't say that," he snickered, "Considering that you'll be an honorary Kim yourself soon."
Oh. Oh.
It would be a week until students started coming to campus, there classes yet to start. When Seungmin mentioned this to you, you asked if you could come along to see the campus once. The campus where you fell in love with him.
"You might be a hot shot CEO," Seungmin relentlessly teased, "But it's good to go back to your roots sometimes."
It was ironic how you called his mother more than he did.
Your feet subconsciously guided you to the library. You loved this library. It was the place where you spent some of the best moments of your life. This was where you slowly fell in love with Seungmin, uncovering him layer by layer until you could call him yours.
You felt a laugh bubble up your throat when you made your way to the Romantic Literature section. Seungmin gave you a poor attempt at a smile as he observed you. In fact, he looked extremely nervous, a sharp juxtaposition to the flirty demeanor of his just a few minutes ago.
You could count on one hand the amount of times you had seen Seungmin being nervous.
It must have been anxiety surrounding the promotion. You reached over to squeeze his hand and give him a reassuring pat. Once you were sure that he would be fine, you turned back to prodding at the books shelved on the wall as if they were part of some lab experiment.
Once you were satisfied, you turned to give Seungmin the signal to go, when you stumbled backwards at what was in front of you.
Seungmin stood down on one knee, a box in his hand, with the most beautiful ring you had ever seen inside it.
"What?" you asked, your voice shaky. Tears instantly began to spring up in your eyes.
This wasn't real. This wasn't happening. But it was. The man you had loved for a decade was here, in front of you, wordlessly asking to turn those ten years into the rest of a shared forever.
"I had a really dramatic speech planned," he rambled, "But I forgot since I'm kind of terrified and you do always tell me to speak from my heart so here goes nothing."
"I have probably mentioned this thousands of times, but I have felt a magnetic pull towards you since the moment I first interacted with you. I didn't know what it would turn into then, but I knew it was going to be something, and I have been eternally grateful that it was love."
"To put it simply: every single infinitesimal particle that makes me in hopelessly in love with every infinitesimal particle that makes you. I love you, so, so much. I have been yearning for a forever with you before I even knew it so; will you marry me?"
He stopped with a sniff and swiped the sleeve of his sweater across his eyes. "Shit, I wasn't supposed to cry."
It all came full circle, didn't it? Ten years ago, he asked you to prom. Ten years later, he offered you eternity.
You let out a laugh and threw yourself at him, peppering him with kisses. "And you said you didn't want to come to work today," you laughed in between your cuddle attack.
"So, this means yes?"
You face palmed. "This means yes, Seungmin. Yes, I will marry you. In every universe, I know that I will spend the rest of my life with you."
Seungmin gathered you in his arms and kissed you like he was burning and you were oxygen. Binary stars, burning and burning, bleeding into each other in every reality because, there could never be you without him, one without the other.
Ten years ago, you swore that you would be the last person Seungmin would ever kiss.
Ten years later, nobody could say that you weren't a woman of your word.
please reblog and comment if you liked this fic! it means everything to me and I love reading your thoughts <3
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Hey so what's up with just people being able to sense that I'm never going to tell them to fuck off so they can just say or do whatever they'd like? Is there beacon? Can someone turn it off please?
I was stupid enough to respond to this guy's post on Bluelight and now he sends me several messages like this a day. And I feel bad, I do, but I don't even know this person whatsoever. Whar could I possibly even say to him? Like he keeps asking me specific questions about tapering Klonopin and I keep telling him I fon't know, I've always just quit benzos cold turkey because I'm a dumbass and also that 'm not trying to just guess at it when if he could cor real die if I'm wrong.
Anyway, just a few random messages not in any kind of chronological order or anything.
"Last night I took shrooms and acid both for the first time in 3 years. Mixed it with klonopin, muscle relaxers, alcohol, weed, meth, and cocaine. Ended up having to Go to ER. Possibly heart and brain damage. Good thing im seeing my cardiologist and neurologist soon. I smoked some meth after getting out of ER. couldn’t resist. I was with a friend. Well I’m out now and have Money only to pay back dealers so no more meth for me"
"Not even tired after all the klonopin and vodka and muscle relaxers. Gonna see a friend and drink and take muscle relaxers and klonopin"
"I build a tolerance to every substance quickly for some reason. Especially methamphetamine. I just slammed and that I have about 1.7 or 1.8 grams left so imma let that sit for after my tolerance break. I’m gonna enjoy this last high before the gnarly come down. I missed one shit and all the blood clotted and I couldn’t see if it was registering so I just sprayed it into the sink. Made another shot. Quarter gram. Felt amazing but not too high right now. Also smoked a couple hits and a line"
"I slammed about .5 grams and dissolved and drank about .5 grams. Maybe a little more. I have high blood pressure and take pills for it. I take them with speed to be safe. I was diagnosed while I was sober so it was from 10 years of drug abuse. Also have a referral for a neurologist for a possible stroke at aneurysm I possibly had last year when I mixed meth, adderall, Xanax, alcohol. I’m 24 years old. And yeah I don’t wanna fuck up my progress at all. So what I’m gonna do is either flush it or use it all cuz I have to make sure I’m present at work"
"I’m not done with the meth. I lied to myself"
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went and typed out a whole work rant but remembered that i’m supposed to cool and sexc and mysterious on this blog
#ugh i can’t be having all of these personal negative text posts my posts should be reserved for h word daya thoughts#im just. anxious bc i had to leave my new trainee to run things on her own ig and ik she’s good she’s so good w the dogs#butttttt i didn’t have time to properly teach her my like. efficiency. and she’s going much slower than i usually do#which is like. yea take your time and be safe i just don’t want anyone to give her shit for going over the time windows for tasks#i think she managed it but it was lookin rough when she had only gotten 3/10 dogs in the first Half of her window#god if this guy im covering for doesn’t rid himself of c*vid soon…. gonna have an aneurysm out here
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...
#my family just left after spending the weekend & idk why my mom felt the need to break my heart not once but 2x#by telling me that she was genuinely proud of me :(((#she made me cry the first time :(( both of us to be exact#im sad :((#dl#i never thought id hear it & i feel like she felt the need to say so bc of the bubble they found in her head as a result of her aneurysm#from last yr :(((#shes gonna have surgery soon & she says she feels confident about it bc of her doctor but i know shes terrified & its so fucking scary....#and shes specifically told me to not stress myself out about it but its hard....esp after she brought it up while we were hugging:((#idk i know we'll be ok buts it scary.....
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WORLDS MOST MISERABLE MORALLY GREY MAN EVER!!! i think like. mark would have been doing some minor villain shit before joining watch so tide would have fought him a handful of times. he's the one who reached out to mark and offered for him to join watch which. mark did not like at first!!! fuck watch all his homies hate watch!! but tide is fucking Stubborn As Shit and explained that it would be easier and safer for him to work for one (1) hero organization with protocols and shit than to work for several villains doing odd jobs and potentially making a lot of enemies that could come after him (and ashe!!!). and eventually he was like ok fuck it. i think watch has a villain rehabilitation program for villains who want to reform. im imagining mark and that other reformed villain (graverobber i think??) in a fucking. classroom sitting in desks with wordsmith pointing at a whiteboard that says "killing = 🚫" lightspeed and tide are in the corner giving them thumbs up as wordsmith shows them the trolley problem and tries to get them to pick the "right" answer. graverobber gets mad that stopping the trolley and crushing all the people on the tracks with his bare hands is the wrong answer and breaks a chair. mark wants to go home
ANYWAY!!! i think tide and mark would be closer than they are in canon for sure. a bit less vitriolic but theres definitely some kinda <3< there. it's really bad at first bc mark is not a fan of being a hero. he's overworked and he's barely at home to even see the kid he's doing this for but he does get to know tide a little more. he sees tide outside of battle for the first time when mark shows up at watch hq to get an assignment in the middle of the night and tide is eating leftover stroganoff in his pyjamas in one of the living spaces and freezes like a deer in headlights when mark sees him. it's weird seeing him out of his hero costume, so he just kind of moves on and goes to lightspeed to get his assignment but he's still Thinking about it. (side note: since archangel is canonically a villain in the villains au i think le toad is the other member of the sov 5. no reason for that i just think it's funny)
tide and wavelength go out on missions a lot together bc tide requests it. he needs to reign mark in and make sure he doesn't kill people!! tide is basically his handler for a bit until mark gets used to being a hero, and spending so much time together changes a lot about their dynamic. they're still very <3< but a little bit of <> too i think. when they're out in the field mark bets tide that he can't incapacitate more villain henchmen than him and tide laughs and they turn it into a competition. tide gets a cut on his hand and mark bandages it up despite tide insisting he can do it himself. mark nearly gets cornered by reporters after a fight and tide swoops in and claims that they're both injured and should go rest and guides mark away with a hand on his back. tide goes out to a public event and mark is patrolling along the rooftops to make sure nothing goes wrong. mark gets hit in the face during a fight and as soon as its done tide asks if he should get mark somewhere private to take off his mask and let him treat it himself, but mark takes off his mask right in front of him and asks how bad it is and tide has a fucking aneurysm because oh hes quite handsome actually oh god wait his nose is bleeding and broken hang on we should fix that first--
also i have NO idea how the first pd mission would go here. im gonna have 2 think abt that. what if they did have tide training them?? i do think atlas would b a cool choice as their mentor but what if instead of just tide training them they fucking. threw mark in there too. tide is such a mentor figure i cannot picture him as just. not being in charge of a stupid group of kids!!! and wavelegth is a package deal with him so just fucking. imagine. world's most depressed pathetic fucking guy assigned stand in dad for three dumbass teenagers one of which is literally a walking rock man. IMAGINE the shenanigans. idk if thats what i want to do but i think it would be fucking funny
HI MAC!!!! DROPPING INTO UR INBOX FOR ENRICHMENT!!! i am still thinking about villains au tidalwave and a mark being a hero actually. what do u think that whole fuckin Dynamic is like between them. bc tide is clearly a well known hero right?? made specifically to be hero, one of the fuckin elemental guys w all of his brothers, etc. and mark is like. more on the level of locust man or some shit. small hero. doesn’t do many public appearances and doesn’t have any statues or anything, very secretive about his citizen identity, works with self made technology instead of getting watch to provide it for him, probably doesn’t have any comic books or figurines of him (and if there r any u just KNOW superhero fans who are collectors go crazy every time they see a poor quality wavelength figurine somewhere out in the wild that shit sells for like five hundred dollars on ebay). he’s just trying to lay low and provide for ashe. meanwhile tide is out here with his face in the public, has comics and figurines (that he didn’t ask for but he doesn’t rly care that they exist bc he was literally made 2 be a hero and that comes with the territory).
tide is Out There!! easily recognizable!! and i like to think that despite that juxtaposition between their roles as heroes, they fight together a lot. if tide is facing a villain, literally everyone knows that wavelength is in the shadows somewhere, either dealing with a smaller villain or setting up a team attack so he can jump out and send an electric current thru tide’s water to (mildly) electrocute a villain until they’re incapacitated. they fight like they’re one person. tide will always stick around for the reporters afterwards and let mark slip away from the public. hey do u think mark keeps his face a secret from all of watch except for tide. do u think mark has shown his face to tide and ONLY tide. hey mac what do u think about villains au tidalwave 🎤
i have a lot of feelings and emotions about villain au mark being a hero youre so fucked up for that. man. its almost hard for me to picture because like. look at him. worlds most miserable morally grey man ever. that drives me so crazy. would he and tide get along? would they act more like friends? or would they still pretend to hate each other. mark acts like hes all annoyed by bigshot heroes how they need the spotlight on them all the time (are they even doing things for the right reasons or do they just like the attention) (sorry ive been reading a lot of worm) .
holyyyyy shit i love the idea that its just. kind of a given that mark is around somewhere whenever tide is. even if theyre not somewhere together, sometimes he just Shows Up. is it a coincidence? who knows not me !! they fight like theyre one person.... they fight back to back totally trusting that the other persons got them. they dont even have to speak they just instinctively understand each other enough to know what to do in a fight. tide is the only one that knows his face. ohguhghhghh. gay as hell to look at another heroes unmasked face. what are you gonna do? kiss about it? ohhhhhhh this is gonna fuck me up dude. hey side note u know how one of pds first missions was fighting wavelength. how would that work in villain au.
#I DOOOO HAVE A NAME FOR THIS AU#misfit toys au#<<was listening 2 the fucking. arcane soundtrack and that song bangs and every time i listen 2 it now i think of villain ashe#might change the au name eventually but thats the working name for it rn#blows a kiss 2 the sky thank u arcane and pusha t for that song it fucks so severely <3#friend tag :3#SORRY THIS GOT LONG OH MY GOD#I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT TIDALWAVE
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Oh here’s the mary prequel mini series I plotted out in my head last night. cut for length because im polite but it is not That long
Episode one: mary walks into a fairly empty diner. Sits down at the counter pretty close to some woman she’s never seen before. Orders coffee. Sits there twisting her ring till it comes. Lady she’s never seen before looks her way and says rough night? And mary laughs and says rough few nights. Lady puts down her newspaper and says you look like you need to talk about it. And mary blurts out that she’s thinking about leaving her husband because he’s so boring. Woman listens sympathetically then launches into a perfect speech about marriage being a commitment and she should stay with him and tell him she loves him. Mary is like. Yeah. Okay. Goes back home to try to rekindle things but when she starts trying to tell John how much she loves him she tells him she’s leaving. John says ok. Mary is super relieved. She goes upstairs to pack. Hears someone at the bedroom door while she’s facing her dresser to pack, turn around, it’s John. He shoots her, she dies.
MARY wakes up next to John as he gets ready for work. Brushes it off as a SUPER weird dream and more proof that she does in fact need to leave. After john’s gone she throws together a suitcase then hops in the impala (John carpools) and drives till she hits a gas station. She goes in to pay and the cashier feels weirdly familiar till she realizes it’s the lady from her dream. She is understandably more freaked out. The cashier tells her to have a nice trip home. Mary says she’s not going home. The cashier asks her if she wants to talk about. Mary doesn’t respond and goes to fill up the car and then drives a couple of miles out of town before the car starts making this awful sound. She jumps out to look at it. Car is now smoking. She starts backing up and in a freak accident the car explodes and kills her.
Mary wakes up next to John as he’s getting ready for work.
Rest of the season: mary goes through a few more loops thinking they’re nightmares especially because she keeps seeing the same woman she’s never seen before and she keeps trying to talk to Mary. Eventually mary snaps and screams at the lady to leave her alone and the lady kind of furtively looks around and says I’m trying to help. Mary says I don’t WANT your help and then hightails it and dies again. After a few more loops where the woman is present but never approaches mary, mary stalks up to her and says. Who are you. Lady very wryly says your guardian angel. Mary says how can you help. Lady says you don’t want my help. Mary goes well I changed my mind I want it now. Lady grabs her hands and looks at her and very earnestly says, no, you don’t want my help. weird! Mary leaves. Dies. For awhile mary keeps meeting with the lady just because she’s a semi comforting constant. Lady keeps giving her advice that’s more and more rote just go back to your husband, until eventually she stops doing that and just listens to Mary. When Mary asks what she thinks instead of launching into the stay with him speech she just stands up and says I need to go.
Their meetings after this are pretty similar: the lady will listen, the lady will tell her it’s a hard decision, but when mary asks her what to do instead of saying “go back” like usual, the lady sighs and says she needs to go before she disappears. Eventually mary stops asking because she doesn’t want the lady to disappear so soon. they start spending the day just hanging out. mary takes her to her favorite places in town and asks if she likes them, asks what the lady wants to do, the whole nine yards. day always ends with mary trying to leave john and having a sudden aneurysm/tripping and cracking her skull/etc. after a couple of weeks of this her and the lady hook up and the lady tells mary that her name is anna.
mary dies again and the next day when she sees anna just starts crying about how she doesn’t want to go back. ends her rant with “and i know what you’re going to say, or what you’re not going to say, but just don’t. please.” anna holds her and holds her and after several minutes of silence says “i think you should leave.” mary’s shocked, anna’s shocked, mary has a heart attack and dies.
the next day mary tells anna that she wants to leave with her. anna looks conflicted and terrified but nods. while they’re driving or w/e anna is like mary. this isn’t going to work. you know this isn’t going to work. but i think - look. listen. we don’t have a lot of time. i think i know how to break this. i wrote it down, you’ll have to translate it - and then anna screams and she’s just Not There anymore. this freaks mary the fuck out while she’s driving, she crashes, dies.
mary spends the next morning hitting all the places she’s seen anna before. nothing. she tears up her house and all these places looking for the journal anna was holding before she disappeared. nothing. she gets more and more frustrated and it’s only after she like completely destroys an aisle at the gas station to no response from anyone that she realizes something is more wrong than usual. she goes back out to her car and there’s this guy leaning against it who goes. hi.
she asks who he is, he tells her to call him chuck. she asks what he wants, he says to help her. she doesn’t trust this for obvious reasons. she asks where anna is. he shrugs and says she’s under performance review. she asks if anna’s okay. he laughs and says oh yeah, she’s gonna be a perfect little angel for about the next ten years. then she’s going to have a great life. very loved by her parents. their little miracle baby, you know?
she asks what he really wants. he shrugs. same thing you want, really. for this whole thing to be done with. mary asks what he means. he waves a hand at her. the groundhog day thing. oh. forgot you don’t know what that is yet. the time loop thing. leaving, dying. leaving, dying. look. just go back home to your ever so loving husband, and everything will be fine.
i don’t want to go back to my husband, mary says. you love him, chuck says. i don’t know that i do, mary says. chuck frowns and tilts his head at her. sighs, twists his hand. mary feels like she just got stabbed in the heart. what did you do, she asks. do you love him? and she thinks about it. and she says. yeah. and then she thinks about it some more. and says but i dont like him. i dont like my husband. chuck claps his hands together and says. okay! what don’t you like? he’s boring. chuck smiles. boring! i can work with boring. perfect apple pie boy from kansas not doing it for you, huh? what about this. what about if he was from... illinois. what if it’s just been him and his mom since he was a kid, because his dad stepped out on them. what if the war made him a little harder, which you like more than him staying kind after the war. chuck laughs. oh, i like that a lot better actually. that’s what we’re running with. mary doesn’t say anything to this.
chuck asks her if she’s ready to go back home to her new and improved husband. mary says anna had a journal. so she did, chuck says, and hands it to her. it’s written in sumerian, so good luck with that. you can spend awhile trying to track down a translator, or. he waves his hand, and it all reads in english. she skims through it. will it work? she asks, and chuck snorts. no. of course not. you’re welcome to try. i’ll be here when you’re done. she leaves. tries the spell or whatever. tells john she’s leaving. dies. when she wakes up the next morning, chuck’s sitting at her table. we done with this? he asks, and mary stabs him. he pulls out the knife, looking annoyed. okay, yeah. we’re done with this, he says, and waves a hand and mary gets struck by lightning.
she wakes up. john’s getting ready for work. there are a few cues that tell us this is the same day. john looks over before he leaves and sees that mary’s crying. he’s very confused. asks her what’s wrong. i don’t know, she says. i don’t know. he asks if he should call his mom. she says no. he asks if he should skip work. she says no. he tells her he loves her. she says i love you too, and he leaves. she spends the day pretty dazed. wanders around town not realizing she’s hitting all the spots where she saw anna. goes to a park where a guy runs into her. it’s chuck. oh, sorry. he says. it’s okay, she says, not recognizing him. great day, huh, he says, and she nods, not really paying attention. bet your husband’s enjoying it, he says, and when she looks confused he points to her ring. oh. yeah. she says. sorry, excuse me, she says, i have to get home. i need to start dinner. he smiles at her, winks, and says her husband’s a lucky man.
they eat together. they sleep together. when mary wakes up it’s a new day. she smiles at john before he leaves and kisses him when he gets back home. end miniseries
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im going to have an aneurysm malcom and trip are stuck in a shuttle pod and gonna suffocate soon and all of a sudden it cut to them in sick bay and archer being like WOW YOU SAVED EVERYONE MALCOM but malcom has no idea what theyre talking about and then tpol starts sweet talking him but it goes on for like five whole minutes and malcom won’t stop saying “stinky” in his stupid little posh accent bc it makes t’pol smile and im going to fucking die watching this
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vent post warning anyway like im not even having physical panic attacks anymore it's just this overwhelming paralyzing fear/impending doom that completely shuts me down for an hour or two. like i get so scared and i can't eat or drink or stay inside it's like immediately i have to flee where i am and sit paralyzed in silence or else i am going to die AND FOR NO REASON MOST OF THE TIME!!!!! like i get obsessed w this idea that something bad IS going to happen and so my brain tries to figure out WHAT and it's like oh well you do have a headache so it's probably an aneurysm or oncoming horrible illness. your stomach kinda hurts it's food poisoning and yr gonna start violently vomiting soon. there was a weird noise inside the house someone probably keeled over and died. your sister texted weird she's probably going to kill herself. LIKE BRO WHAT!!! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING TO ME??? and it makes me so irritated because in every other aspect of life i am an extremely logical brained person so it makes me extra mad when i have to go sit in silence and lay paralyzed in terror because of something so irrational !!
no more panic disorder i just wanna make dinner
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Ok so Im going to take this chance and go wild: GiottoxMukuro + Bad Vongola AU
UM. So, I sort of just sat on this last one cuz what even lmao. I checked AO3 and omg this ship exists??? but there’s like just two fics under it. But alright, here’s my stab at this very random pairing, it doesn’t even quite get all the way to a pairing, but I gave them both page time and at least you gave me something new to try XD Sorry it’s so late.
ALSO YAY I FINISHED ALL TEN
1. Ok so! First thing’s first - how do I stick these two into the same time period? Either full AU or time travel/reincarnation fuckery. Let’s go with reincarnation. Sort of. Where Neo Primo is literally Neo Primo ;)
Tsuna is dead. They’re in the future arc, he’s being forced to take the boss trial, and Hibari suffocates him just a little too long. So Tsuna dies at the feet of his ancestors, and Giotto is forced to witness the death of a fourteen-year-old boy who had never asked for any of this bloodshed but had also never backed down from it, never folded, even under the pressure of so many Vongola bosses. And Giotto is angry. He has spent centuries watching his beloved Vongola become mired in blood and sin, built on an empire of corpses and suffering. He is so sick of it, of not being able to do anything about it, but his latest descendant is dead, and his body is empty of a soul, and in that moment, more than anything else, all Giotto wants is a chance to act, to be something other than helpless, to fix even just a little of what his bloodline has broken.
Will and Flames and desperation are powerful things when combined.
Next thing Giotto knows, he’s opening his eyes to a cold-looking training room, the remains of a cage that killed a fourteen-year-old boy splintering around him, and it barely takes a thought for his Flames to surge up and out and slam the Cloud - Hibari Kyouya - into the far wall with a viciousness Giotto had spent the majority of his first life keeping under wraps. For a split second, he almost kills the Cloud for his gall. A Guardian who could murder his own Sky - however well-intentioned or unknowingly - is no Guardian at all, but then, out of all of the Tenth Generation, as far as Giotto can tell, not a single one of them had had a real bond with Tsuna. The one who’d come closest had been the Mist, but after ten years and the weight of Vongola’s sins on his shoulders, even that connection had dissolved.
If Giotto is honest, the person Tsuna had become ten years later under the crushing pressure of that Sun Arcobaleno and the Vongola had been near unrecognizable compared to the boy Giotto had so admired. But that man is dead, at least for now, dragged under by too many enemies and too many bad decisions, and all that’s left is this younger version, dragged to the future against his will and forced to fight a war of someone else’s making.
Not even that anymore obviously, and all that’s left is Giotto, a bloody legacy to his name and too many regrets to pay for. All he can do is live out Tsuna’s life now and hopefully undo some of the damage Vongola has wrought. Tsuna wouldn’t want him killing this Cloud though, and so Giotto lets him go in the end. Hibari gets to his feet, something bloodthirsty and thrilled gleaming in his eyes, completely ignorant of the fact that he’d killed his Sky, and all Giotto can think as he recalls the way Tsuna had always had to bribe this man for him to even consider helping is how Alaude must be rolling in his grave.
“I’m done,” He says instead, slicing a cool look around the room, and then he walks out, back to his room. Nobody stops him, but Giotto wouldn’t have stopped him either, with the shadow of his Flames licking across the concrete floor.
2. Giotto does his duty. Ten years in the future is far too late to really change anything significant, so the faster he takes care of business here, the sooner they can all go home. In the meantime, it amuses him - in a funny world-burning sort of way - how none of Tsuna’s friends seems to realize anything is wrong, that the boy they profess their loyalty to is gone, and his body has been usurped by an interloper. Giotto considers himself a decent enough actor, but for a bunch of Flame-actives with Vongola rings on their fingers and Guardian titles to their names, they’re a rather oblivious lot.
(All of Tsuna’s past and present and future sits in his memories now though, and Giotto can’t say he’s terribly surprised. The person these children wanted to follow was never actually the boy Tsuna had been, not entirely. They pay attention to the parts of him that they like, and ignore the rest like they don’t exist. It infuriates Giotto, because Tsuna deserved better, but Tsuna is dead, and even if Giotto has every intention of at the very least demoting them from their Guardian positions once they’re finished here, he cannot truly harm these children Tsuna had called friends.)
So he does his duty, fights the battles people want him to fight, and smiles blandly back in the face of Reborn’s suspicious glances. That hitman at least can sense something is off, if only because his student no longer cringes or screams, but no one save the Vongola bosses knows the details of what happens in the Vongola Trial, and it’s easy enough to balance Reborn’s misgivings with that.
It’s fun though, messing with the pseudo-baby. The last time Reborn tried to shoot him awake in the morning, Giotto had set the entire room on fire and ended up singeing off Reborn’s sideburns. The resulting training session had been grueling, but it had been worth finally getting back at the man first responsible for more or less browbeating Tsuna into obedience.
Pettiness aside, Giotto does put effort into training. Tsuna’s body is in decent shape, but it could be even better, so Giotto does his best to make it so. The weapons of the future are something of a marvel too, and he smiles indulgently at the full-grown wing-adorned flame-pelted Leone di Cieli that gracefully leaps out to greet him, but in the privacy of his rooms, he lets his Flames swirl free and summons the phoenix that had been his constant companion in his first life, the soul of his Flames, his will made sentient.
“Natsu,” He names the lion, after Tsuna, and welcomes Persephone home as she does a sweep of his bedroom before landing light and delicate on his shoulder, the way she’d always done in battle.
The looks on everyone’s faces when they see her with him is enough to make Giotto smile for the next week.
3. It becomes clear soon enough that they’re going to need all hands on deck for the final confrontation against Millefiore, but even before that, Giotto begins asking some pointed questions that Tsuna had thought but hadn’t quite been brave enough to ask.
“When are we getting my Mist out of Vendicare?” He enquires one night over dinner, and smiles pleasantly as everyone freezes. “We require all the aid we can get, yes? And Mukuro has always been strong.”
“Jyuudaime!” Hayato is the first to burst out, chair skidding back with how emphatically he stands up. “We don’t need that bastard!” Giotto looks at him, not a twitch in his expression, impenetrable as ice even as he keeps his features soft, and Hayato falters. “Or- Or even if we do, he can just possess Dokuro! He can’t be trusted if we let him out!”
Giotto stirs more sugar into his coffee - rich and sweet, gave G a minor aneurysm every time he saw it - just the way he likes it. “So we make him serve, and offer nothing in return?”
Giotto waits out the confused spluttering around him. Reborn is drilling holes into the side of his head but he pays the baby no mind.
“He has been imprisoned for ten years,” Giotto continues in mild tones. “And has remained loyal all this time, si?” He glances briefly at Chrome, the younger one, who stares back, meek and mute. She is loyal to Mukuro above all others, and it would’ve been so very easy for him to influence her into betraying Vongola - betraying Tsuna - anytime.
That he hadn’t, in all this time, is… something. It’s something. The lingering threads of a frayed potential bond. The stubborn refusal to give up something he’d once perhaps considered his. A promise once given - keep my people safe and you will have my allegiance - and never broken, not by Mukuro.
People have often remarked on how similar the First and Tenth Generations are. Personally, Giotto has never seen two sets of people so different.
“I wish to free him,” He says at last, over the voices of those trying to convince him otherwise. “Loyalty deserves loyalty returned. Whatever else he used to be, he has bled in my service for ten years. Surely that is enough to justify his release?”
It is not a question, and everyone knows it. Reborn is all but glaring now. He doesn’t like this new Tsuna who does not cower even in the face of his bullets.
Giotto is spiteful enough to enjoy every moment of it.
It is Takeshi who relents first. “Okay,” He says, all easy agreement and assessing eyes, and maybe this one at least is not so far removed from Ugetsu’s blood after all. “But how are we gonna do that? Vendicare’s hard to break into, right?”
Hayato - the only mafia-raised of the lot - looks positively horrified. “It’s not hard, Baseball Freak, it’s impossible!”
“But Mukuro already broke out twice, didn’t he?”
“Yes,” Giotto interjects, smiling at Takeshi, who preens a little under the attention and is in some ways possibly the most insane of them all. Giotto does have a fondness for those who consider laws as guidelines at best. “So, I suppose we need a Mist.” He takes a gulp of his coffee. “The Varia has a new one these days, don’t they?”
Three conferences, five one-sided shouting matches, and a hefty sum of money transferred over to the Varia accounts later, Giotto has secured Xanxus’ partly baffled, mostly irritated agreement for Fran’s services. Fran turns out to be a rather… precocious young man, but he has Mist Flames and skills that almost rival Mukuro’s, and Giotto is relatively content to leave the breakout to him.
His confidence is not misplaced. Days and half a dozen more battles later, with Byakuran grandstanding across from him, Giotto’s entire ill-fitted, misfit Family is gathered, and the First Generation appears at Giotto’s silent command to unseal the Vongola rings.
(All of them know what he is, the soul peering out from behind Tsuna’s eyes. But in this one moment, not even Daemon gives him away, and Giotto is free to finally unleash his carefully controlled wrath on the Family that had decimated his.)
Millefiore doesn’t stand a chance.
4. “You are not Sawada Tsunayoshi,” Mukuro - the older one - says in deceptively light tones as he joins Giotto on the balcony. It’s late, the night before they would all finally return to the past, and the two of them are probably the only ones still awake.
“No,” Giotto confirms, because there’s no hiding it from this man. “I’m afraid Sawada Tsunayoshi perished in Kyouya’s Box Weapon when he and Reborn attempted to force a Vongola Trial.”
Mukuro, staring out at the sprawling woods before them, does not visibly react, does not even move. For a moment, it doesn’t even seem like he’s breathing, and that’s what gives him away.
Giotto does not say he is sorry. He is, for this, and for too many other things to list, but whatever connection had formed between Tsuna and his Mist had been lost a long time ago, and sorry only sounds trite in the face of such a travesty. The only reason Mukuro had never drifted away, Giotto suspects, was because the Mist had refused to let go. Mukuro himself would never admit it, perhaps never even acknowledge it to himself, but if there was one thing Giotto had always envied Tsuna for, it was his ability to earn a Mist’s devotion so completely.
(And so it had hurt all the more to watch the years go by as Tsuna allowed Vongola to convince him to leave Mukuro in Vendicare. Hurt most of all to realize, one day, that Tsuna no longer cared so long as Mukuro continued reporting in and doing as he was told.)
“What will you do with my younger self?” Mukuro eventually asks, carefully void of every emotion save for the thinnest veneer of detached interest.
“Free him,” Giotto replies promptly, seeing no need for word games here. Reborn had tried to interrogate him about his Vongola Trial, and Giotto had given him every answer but a straight one. It had been highly entertaining. “If he wishes, he will have a place in my Famiglia. If he does not, then I will ensure he is able to start a new life elsewhere with his people, without Vongola dogging their every step.” He pauses, absently considering his hands, more solid than they’ve been in four hundred years. “Even Tsunayoshi’s fear of Reborn was not enough to stop him from asking repeatedly after you. This is the least I can do for your younger self when Tsunayoshi worried about him so often.”
Mukuro scoffs, a hollow puff of air that fades to nothing. “Had he a few more years in him, you would’ve had nothing to concern yourself with.”
Giotto inclines his head in acknowledgement but says nothing more. There is probably no one who knew Tsuna - who fought him and lost to him and understood him - more than Mukuro. The Mist doesn’t need Giotto expounding on the rise and fall of one of the brightest and most short-lived Skies the world would ever see.
“You will not tell the others about me?” Giotto asks instead, more curious than any kind of anxious about it.
Mukuro tips a mocking facsimile of a smile in his direction, looking him straight-on for the first time since his arrival. “What business is it of mine, if Vongola wishes to destroy itself?”
Giotto half-smiles, half-grimaces. He supposes this is hardly a surprise either; it was never Vongola that Mukuro swore unspoken fealty to.
So instead, he reaches out, gently catching one of Mukuro’s hands in his own and knowing he can only because Mukuro allows it. Mismatched eyes watch him like a hawk, a derisive curl on his lips that freezes when Giotto presses the flickering heat of a piece of Sky Flame into his palm.
Then he steps back, once, twice, enough room to sketch an esoteric bow, too formal for this age but recognizable enough here and now if Mukuro’s sharp intake of breath is anything to go by.
Gratitude. Apology. And a dissolution of debt and duty between Guardian and Sky.
If Mukuro so wishes, even after Giotto is gone, the shard of Sky will ensure a clean break from Vongola, and not even Sawada Tsunayoshi will be able to track his former Guardian down. It is all Giotto can offer him.
He straightens, glancing at the piece of Sky now settled into the shimmering form of a phoenix feather. A new life, if Mukuro wants it.
He meets the Mist’s gaze. Mukuro is the first to look away, fingers curling around the feather, eyes on the horizon, and he doesn’t speak again.
Giotto nods, takes his leave, and he does not see the Mist again, not this version at least. Once time straightens itself out, the adult Tsuna of this universe will return, and while Millefiore is no longer a threat, Vongola - and its Decimo - will still be the same stagnant bloodstained mess.
There is nothing Giotto can do about that, but at the back of his mind, he wonders if it wouldn’t have been better after all to have let Millefiore wipe Vongola out.
5. Later, much later, after a jailbreak and Daemon and a broken curse, Giotto and his Guardians - still no bonds, but he can’t seem to find a good time to get rid of them, so maybe instead of that, he can educate them to be better - sit down for a Family dinner at the most upscale banquet hall Namimori has to offer, with the Ninth and his men, the CEDEF and even Varia. They’re in public so everyone has their law-abiding citizen face on, but (a redo of) the Inheritance Ceremony is imminent, and Timoteo smiles, sly and pleased that all the pieces have finally fallen into place. He waves Giotto into the seat on his immediate right and doesn’t even question how very little Giotto resembles Tsuna these days, ascribing the changes to Reborn’s training and recent battles and growing up, and looking no further than that.
The food is good, Italian but cooked by the best chefs on Vongola payroll. Giotto stares Kyouya into grudging silence over the fare, and then he focuses on chatting amicably with Timoteo, weaving smooth flattery into casual but attentive conversation the way he’d learned to do a lifetime ago.
Giotto watched Timoteo grow up. There is no skeleton in his closet that Giotto did not witness him stashing away. But he is old and past his prime and he will soon learn that his successor is not as easy to control as he’d hoped, as he thinks, so Giotto can smile back now and give him his momentary triumph, smile and sip his wine and not let his eyes linger on every bite of food Timoteo takes.
During a lull in the conversation, he turns and catches Mukuro’s eye. His Mist is seated beside his female counterpart, all the way at the end of the line, farthest from his Sky to any outsider’s eye. But Mukuro smirks back from behind his cloth napkin, and as the Nono’s dessert is carried in, the faint twist of Mist Flames - unnoticed by all except two - darts into the panna cotta.
Timoteo eats his fill, compliments the chef, beams at Giotto’s gently filial fussing again like the kindly grandfather he excels at pretending to be, and nobody thinks to question how masterfully Giotto draws all attention to himself and his rowdier Guardians, never letting the generally jovial mood falter, his Sky Flames a subtle pulsing encouragement beneath it all to distract them from the knife at their backs.
The whole affair is a success. At the very least, nobody threw any food, no fights broke out, and no one lost their tempers. It almost feels like a miracle.
They part ways in groups, and to their credit, Hayato and Kyouya only try to kill each other after the elder Vongola party is gone. It doesn’t take long for Ryouhei to join in, and at a glance from Mukuro, Chrome scoops Lambo up and picks up her pace to catch up to a laughing Takeshi.
Mukuro falls into step beside Giotto. Giotto had asked, after the Arcobaleno business was finally over, if Mukuro would stay. Mukuro had asked what Giotto would offer if he did.
“A place in my Family, for you and yours,” Giotto had sworn. “And a hand in toppling the Vongola Empire once and for all.”
Mukuro had smiled, ten years’ worth of another world’s memories behind it, and six lives’ worth of suffering driving his answer.
“Tsunayoshi would never have chosen this method,” Mukuro says now, voice pitched low but as idly as if he were commenting on the weather.
Giotto smiles, grim and long past the point of any return.
Tsuna was his favourite. He reminded Giotto of the man he used to be, when Vongola was still a goal wrapped in optimism and determination, before they’d become embroiled in the mafia and Giotto had spent the next four hundred years after his death watching his life’s work build itself a throne of corpses.
Tsuna was his favourite, but he was also an ideal Giotto won’t ever be again, and cannot be if he truly wants to see this iteration of Vongola dead in his second lifetime. Tsuna would’ve been eaten alive by Vongola - Giotto had seen an entire future’s worth of proof of that.
“I am not Tsunayoshi,” Giotto says, and it is another regret he will have to carry, but their world is neither kind nor fair, and Tsuna as he was would never have survived it.
Mukuro studies him, a thoughtful tilt to his head, and something like fascination glitters in his eyes. “No, you are not,” He agrees. “But that isn’t necessarily a bad thing.”
Giotto glances at him, then ahead, at children who had almost killed and been almost killed mere days ago, now roughhousing amongst themselves. “The world could do with more Tsunayoshis.”
“The world needs more of you,” Mukuro retorts just as swiftly, a sardonic sort of amusement in his smirk. “In that other future, Tsunayoshi proved beyond a doubt that everything he promised, he couldn’t keep, didn’t he? And yet here you are, Vongola Primo, poisoning your enemies over dinner, and just yesterday you had me hide you while you met with Gesso and Simon and Giglio Nero in private. You certainly don’t waste any time.” His smirk widens. “If Vongola isn’t careful, you’ll turn half of Europe against the older generation before they realize it.”
Giotto hums and doesn’t deny any of it. “You would be willing to aid me though?”
Mukuro arches an eyebrow, and his right eye flickers briefly with Mist Flames. “Have I not been doing so already?”
Giotto nods. “Yes, and I am grateful. But lending a hand now is not the same as devoting at least the next ten years of your life to a goal most would consider impossible. And I am not Tsunayoshi.”
Mukuro’s steps slow, then stop entirely. Giotto blinks and halts as well, half-turning.
“Does that matter so much to you?” Mukuro asks, peering at him with surprisingly genuine puzzlement. “Do you think it matters so much to me? That you are not Tsunayoshi?”
Giotto half-shrugs, and Mukuro shakes his head. “Tsunayoshi had a heart that I will never fully understand,” He says, blunt in a way he almost never is. “He was naive and foolish, hopeful and soft, and it made him as weak as it made him strong. I could trust him to never turn on Chrome or Ken or Chikusa, even if they or I tested his tolerance, but by that same logic, I could never have trusted him to stand firm against Vongola’s ideals, no matter what he proclaimed. And I was right, wasn’t I? In the end, Vongola destroyed him, and he became one of them.”
He pauses, his gaze sliding away, hands coming together to twist one of the rings on his fingers. Then he looks back at Giotto, and his next smirk is equal parts challenge and approval. “You though. You have witnessed the results of letting your previous Mist Guardian walk free, and spent years watching your descendants commit atrocities in the name of strengthening your organization. If I were to promise you my loyalty, and then betray you sometime down the road, you would slit my throat yourself. But at the same time, at least I know - you are both ruthless enough and determined enough to see your objectives through to the end, with a conviction that’s centuries in the making. The current Vongola would have to kill you to stop you.” His right eye flares indigo again. “So I suppose that is where I come in.”
Up ahead, the others turn a corner, still bickering. Giotto thinks Takeshi has probably noticed that he and Mukuro have fallen behind, and of course Chrome knows, but neither of them stops to wait either.
Mukuro steps back, once, twice, and Giotto’s eyes widen as the Mist lifts a hand to brush over the earring he hasn’t stopped wearing since he got it. And then… well.
The Mukuro from the future must’ve known how because this Mukuro doesn’t even look awkward as he drops to one knee and bows his head, just a dip, slow enough to look deliberate, proud enough to meet Giotto’s gaze again afterwards.
“You asked for ten years, Neo Primo,” Mukuro announces. “So, very well, I will pledge you ten years of my life, for you to use as you see fit, so long as you keep your word. We can revisit this in a decade, but for the next ten years, I will make you untouchable to your enemies and sow discord amongst them in your name.” He smiles and it’s a mad and bloodthirsty thing, the same furious hateful beast he’d aimed at Daemon Spade when he’d sought to rip Chrome from Mukuro’s side. “And should the worst come to pass and I go the way of my predecessor, may my life be forfeit at your hands.”
He reaches up, catches Giotto’s hand in his own, and his red eye glows as orange and indigo burst into existence between their fingers, a blaze of light under the night sky as they twine together, fierce and unyielding and true.
They both gasp from the surge of power that rushes through them as the Guardian bond snaps into place, the first one Giotto will ever have in this body, the first one in over four hundred years, a core of Flame that promises a home, something Daemon had never been able to give him, and Giotto doesn’t even think before he’s yanking Mukuro to his feet and reeling him close.
Tsuna had been short for his age so Giotto isn’t quite eye-level with his new Mist, but it hardly matters when he curls a near-bruising grip along Mukuro’s jaw and sees the same hunger and possessiveness he feels reflected in the illusionist’s eyes.
“A Guardian bond is not something I take lightly,” Giotto murmurs, and he knows even without a mirror that his own Flames are burning in his eyes. “You are mine now, and I do not share. In ten years, you will pledge another ten, and another ten after that, and any who dare to try and take you from me, I would run rivers red with their lifeblood.”
(These oaths are old, old and binding and near-forgotten, bastardized ten ways to Sunday but still echoing of power, and even in Giotto’s time, only G and Ugetsu had sworn them. That his new reign would begin with one, when as far as Giotto knows, none have spoken them in centuries - perhaps it speaks of the dawn of a new age.)
Mukuro inhales shakily, not at all prepared for the sheer depth and intensity of a true Flame bond. But the grip he has on Giotto’s wrist is just as tight as Giotto’s, and it only takes him another breath to regain his bearings.
“As you Will it, Giotto,” Mukuro murmurs, and it crackles over Giotto’s skin. No one has spoken his name since his resurrection.
The bond settles between them, calm now but no less potent. Giotto lets go, tickling a tongue of Sun-tinted Sky Flame along Mukuro’s skin to soothe the sting left behind. Mukuro only huffs a breath of laughter, gaze still unwavering on Giotto’s face.
“Well then,” The Mist - Giotto’s Mist - smiles, quieter, more serene, like a glass-spun secret cloaked in shadow, but exultantly bright all the same. “Long live the new King. May your reign be long and prosperous.”
#khr#headcanon meme: answered#giotto#rokudo mukuro#G69#vongola famiglia#headcanon#there we go g69 wow i didn't think i could do it#lmfao they're both prob way ooc#but that's how it came out
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📖✏bangtan as college students:jungkook✏📖
-the cute, quiet guy in class who will just stare at you when you ask him if you could borrow his notes from last week bc u were ill
- taehyung will apologise for his friend, nudge jk, which will snap him back to reality
- apologises and says that his notes are messy anyways, bc he takes notes in a way that only he understands
-you started talking after that bc he had to decode that shit to you
-shy bean turns out to be a super goofy dude who is scarily organized but with a system only he understands, and it works out for him, his grades are pretty good
- junior dance instructor as the campus dance lessons, besties with his senior, jung hoseok
-jimin and you both tutor him sometimes bc he has problems in some lectures
-one day, you were chilling at yours and you said that you guys should practice for an English presentation and hes like "I gotta clear my head first" and goes for a run, which u would understand in every normal circumstance, except it's 1 am and you're like "???????"
-he comes back like 30 mins later, but he doesnt look sweaty at all and you're just confused as hell + he comes back with a box of donuts which leaves you even more confused
-he did indeed go for a run, was actually back at yours after 20 mins
-turns out he stopped by at yoongi's bc he saw the lights on, "hyung said he'd give me donuts if I leave and I thought you'd appreciate it"
-supreme chaotic energy but he means well
-will lowkey have an aneurysm whenever he sees ur messy room
-cherries are a running gag between you two, bc after you went over to his place the first time and you became hungry after a while, opened his fridge and burst out laughing after seeing what was inside of his fridge: cheese strings, leftover jajangmyeon, 5 packs of banana milk (which was nothing new to you) and maraschino cherries ("I like the finer things in life y/n" - "sure..." - he stared at you without a word when you opened the cupboard and roughly 8 packs of ramen fell out, right on your head, and then laughed his ass off when you just said "hallelujah")
-actually very thoughtful and sweet, but also very mischievous, the two of you would play pranks on each other on many occasions (the prank war ended with a cup of very bitter coffee that almost ended your friendship)
-jk got shit-faced drunk at one of the biggest parties of the semester and started singing/yelling to snsd's "i got a boy" and started dancing, which you filmed, obviously, your host (jimin) himself kicked you out, after jk took some pills from a very shady guy and jimin and you started fighting jk while trying to take the pills away from him and jk accidentally knocked over a fancy vase that jimin got from god knows where
- you dragged jungkook to jimins place the next day bc you were equally mad about to whole ordeal and you also knew you sure af don't wanna get on park jimin's bad side
- jimin: .....
you: he's really sorry
jk: 😔 yes....
jm: ........ (antarctica could never)
jk: hyung pls 😔😔🥺🥺🥺🥺
jm: it's ok, i can buy a new vase🥺🥺
jk: ☺️
(jimin also has a revelation about how to trick people into giving into his wishes)
- you guys' way to deal with hangovers would be an unholy amount of ramen and watching movies all day (jk would take at least 3 naps inbetween, he once woke up to princess mononoke, started sobbing and asked "why are humans like this" and fell back asleep) he'd occasionally snuggle up to you while asleep & would be very embarrassed about it when he would wake up, you'd have to reassure him everytime:
jk: ...u sure it doesn't bother you.. ?
you: what can I say, I've grown quite fond of messy hair and snores, I suppose, oh and drool on my shoulder obviously
jk: are you my friend or my enemy
you: I could ask you the same thing sometimes
- you had an important paper to write before Christmas and you asked him to stay away from you for a while bc you know he would manage to distract you somehow, he respected it but didn't like it one bit
-and you were actually busy for a few days, you guys talked a bit after class and just texted occasionally, but he didn't hear from you for most of the time, which did not sit well with him, jimin helped jk out on this one and texted you
-jimin: are you done with your paper yet?
you: pretty far from it tbh
jimin: lmao rip
you: what do you want jimin, im busy😣
jimin: spend some time with the kid, I honestly cannot take this anymore, hes gonna go full emo mode soon, do something
you: lmao tell him he can come over to mine, I was just about to order some food, ill wait for him then
- you proceeded with your paper and jungkook was at yours 40 mins later, with Chinese takeout and laughed at your dishelved figure when you opened the door, then hugged you, "jungkook are you my friend or my enemy?" - "I bring free food to your place, what do you think ?" - "touché"
#bts fluff#bts crack#bts fanfic#bts headcanons#bts fic#bts scenarios#bts imagines#bts jungkook#bts#bangtan#jeon jungkook#jeon jeongguk#bts x you#bts x reader#jungkook headcanon#jungkook au#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fluff#jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#bts au#bts college au#bts as college students#jungkook scenarios#mine
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