#im just anxiety coping drawing

[humans-are-tasty]

[ghoulodont]

ive been obsessively reading drugs.com reviews for various antipsychotics as one does when prescribed a new one and theres this pattern that illustrates something i already knew but it still hurts to see. multiple negative reviews urge readers that because their experience was so unpleasant they would strongly recommend against taking this antipsychotic... unless youre psychotic or bipolar or schizophrenic. i agree that you generally shouldnt be giving people antipsychotics for their anxiety disorder or to little kids with autism. pharma marketing is evil. i think there was a lawsuit about it for this drug in particular. but you absolutely can say that without blatantly drawing a very static line between people you deem worthy of suffering and those you dont

[candyunicornsateme]

One day I will write a multi chapter fanfic but I’d really have to go quiet to focus on it and hopefully people will still be around by then cuz I’ve already had projects I finally did only for it to be literally dead times hahahsoidhsdfhik

[metis-iphigenia]

DAMIAN WAYNE SCHOOL HEADCANONS because school opened like 2-3 weeks ago and i need to cope

•since he is 15 years old, he is in 10th grade(not letting dc pull a tim drake and make him the same age forever)

•he used to love chemistry in the 9th grade because the first subject was alchemy if i remember correctly(dc can pry the "al ghuls are alchemists" hc(canon) from my cold dead hands)

but he lost interest in chemistry quickly after the subject passed.

•his all time favourite classes are math and art. im just sure damian's type of person that doesnt separate math and art from eachother

•why art is his favourite is a given but his favourite is math because math is a class based on problem solving(and also because he can do math easily)

but yeah ik his classmates are very very annoyed whenever he says "math is easy"

•I imagine him arguing with his english teacher the most for some reason. there is no reason other than damian is a very educated kid about the english literature(literature in general) so either he doesnt care or he correct his teacher on literally everything.

•i feel like he would either do a very detail research about the book he read and write a very long essay, or make a very short one and not enough detailed. no in between(because he misunderstood his teachers when they said to "keep it short")

•he begged his father to let him take an exam that lets him skil grades based on his level but his father refused so now he takes advanced math etc.

•him and duke see eachother in the morning regularly(insomniac duke, and damian who wakes up at 5.30 is real) and they sit down to talk about random shit till 7 am mostly(duke explained him the fnaf lore and damian talked about creepypastas real)

•he texts with maps both on their way to their separate schools and make plans to meetup after school to just hang out

•damian usually reads or draws in most of the classes since he already knows everything they are teaching but when asked a question, he does yap a lot(dc should bring back yapper damian ngl)

•bathroom breakdowns were very real for 9th grade damian(literally canon event for everyone with social anxiety or people who get overstimulated at school)

•still bullied just doesnt care about it and insults them/messes with them back to get back at the bullies(it stops after him also messing with them)

•he loves playing football and volleyball but not with his teammates(ik hes #3 frat boy hater i just feel it) so he only gets along with 2 of his teammates. i imagine their personality as scott and stiles from teen wolf so yeah

•has one(1) friend and two(2) teammates he doesnt hate in total(girlfailure and girlsuccess damian youre real to me🙌😼)

also he got multiple friends outside of school anyways lmao bro is anything BUT anti-social(to me hes also the type to join his schools projects etc or debate teams)

•he always calls his mother when he makes it to school and whenever hes leaving it because talia worries and he wants ease her worries(ultimate mother daughter duo)

•after school he has a yap session with nika and they talk about everything that happened to them that day(yapper4yapper gravebird my beloved)

•him and stephanie rant about school daily and talk about how much they hate it(but they both wont drop out since steph wants that med school degree and damian also wants it in the future(med student sisterisms real))

•jon may be going to a journalism school(i think??) but hes still a science nerd so their study sessions always turns into an argument about an equation or a science problem

>>> so i think thats it!! please tell me your headcanons too and help me cope with school also because i love reading about hcs(esp thosr about damian) <<<<

[orkbutch]

Okay! time to add my accompanying essays with each image from this set of work about why I assigned which types of play to each set of characters, and how Baldur's Gate III supports these in the text of the game. Because I thought about all of this way too much im not joking

First, Context: All of these are drawings of consentual play happening between these characters after they have put aside any active conflicts between each other. Nontheless, they utilise the dynamics and emotional conflicts of these characters. Each of these characters are in some way violent people, deeply stressed out by their circumstances, and craving pleasure and connection. Sometimes you need a little pinch and squeal before the end of the world just to get through the night, you know?

Rough D/s sex/Breath play, Karlach (D) / Shadowheart (S)

A little clarification of what exactly is happening in this image: Karlach is strapping SH roughly, whispering very dirty things in hear ear, and using her hand and the weight of her body to gently restrict SH's breathing. Now you know. :) If you want to know what Karlach is whispering, I will be taking questions thank you.

The first thing Shadowheart says upon seeing Karlach is that she likes that Karlach looks strong and reliable enough to protect her in a pinch. This is because Shadowheart is horny and gay but ALSO. I wanted to explore this little glimpse of something unexpected about SH, especially that early in the game, but really revealing and true about her personality: Shadowheart understands and appreciates that relying on others is very important and shouldn't be avoided.

I think this part of SH is almost her saving grace from otherwise being totally absorbed by her Sharran faith; knowing she wants and needs other people. Because community has always been comforting to her, and because other people help you cope with life. It makes her loneliness far more profoud as well. She has not buried a need for other people (like Astarion for example), but lost people she knows she needs. She lost her Sharran peers on their mission, lost her memories, lost her family, lost the experience of being cared for in childhood. What does that have to do with SH getting pounded into the ground by a big hot woman, I hear you asking. Well, it's related to how I see Shadowheart's possible relationship to submission. I instinctively see SH as a dom because she just... Absolutely gives dominatrix energy. She basically got trained to be a particularly mean dominatrix, and I think she'd enjoy doing it a whole lot. But being a dom is a role of responsibility, reliability and authority; it requires you to plan and think and make decisions not just for yourself but for a whole additional person. Shadowheart clearly enjoys not having to do that sometimes. She knows the reliability, guidance and support of another person/people being there for her, and she craves it.

I think she'd like being taken away from the responsibility of their situation; to not have to think about the artifact, the tadpole, the fate of the world, what Shar wants, who she is, what her memories are, will she die tomorrow - a terribly stressful existence for someone as prone to anxiety as SH seems to be. What a luxury, to let someone force all the worries out of your head. To leave no space for those anxieties to find purchase through the weight and force of their presence. A big, hot, reliable warrior, squeezing you close, filling your head with what to think about, flooding you with pleasure and a little pain, enough to ground you to the moment. It's a rare treat. SH would love it.

On the other hand, I think Karlach would absolutely love this kind of role. Not because Karlach likes pure power - she seems kinda repelled by it actually - but because Karlach loves being capable, needed, and providing for people. To sweep SH off her feet and give her a moment of hot, rough, rejuvinating bliss through her strength and sexual prowess would be extremely up Karlach's ally.

Karlach is also just... such a rough houser. She's an excited dog at the park that plays too rough and feels bad until she finds a friend who actually loves it, and she's thrilled with the chance to use all that energy to its full potential. She likes a little grit and texture. Anything too slow or methodical and I think she'd get bored. To get to use her boundless energy and have that be deeply appreciated would be so fun for her.

For her to get to use her body and the traits that ended up landing her in slavery - her toughness, strength, skill at violence and knack for intimidation - to indulge, to provide pleasure, to make something good and deeply desired... I think that'd be very touching for Karlach. Intimacy is something she hasn't gotten to explore for a long time. She wants as much contact as possible, to feel others viscerally, to feel that she can be something that other people can not just handle/accept but enthusiastically want. Even after whats been done to her and what she was for ten years, she is the right thing for people, because of and not despite who she is after Avernus.

In conclusion: I think Shadowheart would love to be no thoughts head empty fucked brainless now and then, and I think Karlach would be thrilled to provide. And oh man, Karlach would be SO good at aftercare. So sweet, so warm to cuddle up against, super attentive. She'd ask for reassurance that she wasn't too rough or didn't say anything weird, and Shadowheart would reassure her that they could get far more depraved than that; it was exactly what she needed, and she wanted to go deeper next time. A little challenge to let Karlach embrace her role more completely. Oof. I am so excited to write this shit into the fic im working on LMAO

[badchoicesworld]

hiii^^ could i request romantic miles x male reader where reader is really shy and quiet (+ has social anxiety if you're okay with writing that)

and (as a result of being quiet) has headphones on 24/7 and draws a lot?

(maybe add a part where he's caught drawing miles! so cliche><)

miles morales w/ an artistic boyfriend riddled with anxieties

sorry to call anyone out in the title, had a giggle about it

im holding this specific anons hand for a minute if they’ll let me, they radiate energy that makes me joyous (hi anon !!!)

established relationship

warnings: none

pairing: miles morales x male!reader

requests: check status on the masterlist

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

ABSOLUTELY RELATES TO YOU

he likes to think that he’s all suave and chill, but everyone knows he’s sheepish when met with certain situations

man can’t take a compliment, he can’t give a compliment, dates make him shake in his boots and having a boyfriend is something that’s entirely over romanticised in his head thanks to media, let’s be honest

social encounters weren’t a massive problem to him though, we’ve all seen how outgoing he is and friendly

plus, he grew up in a community where everyone knew everyone, wether you liked it or not

so he’s the “he asked for no pickles” half while you stand behind him shitting ur pants

he notices how shy you get while you’re out in public in comparison to in private, and he’s okay with that

doesn’t suddenly baby you though, just likes to check in on you every now and again until you’re back home

literally the most discreet “you good?” while stood in line or something

miles can absolutely understand coping with music, he’s the exact same way

you two share some interests, music and art ! it’s cute

he likes to suggest sharing some earphones either out in public or in private, it’s just one of those things that makes you two feel closer (he’s mad sheepish when suggesting it at first, but it eventually becomes one of those silent exchanges if ur cool with sharing) his version of romance

if he sees you with your headphones on, he won’t actively try to talk to you - from personal experience he can understand how stupidly frustrating it feels and wildly overstimulating

unless it’s something important, then he’ll try grab your attention by like tapping your shoulder or smthn,, a lil wave

makes bangin playlists for you, some to share and would be very happy if you did the same

he’s happy to do anything for his boyfriend to make him feel more comfortable in social situations.

you’re quiet, he doesn’t mind it as long as you have some kinda way to communicate with him - your needs and such

hold hands, your hands got stuck together once thanks to his spider-man-ness

if you didn’t know he was spider-man then, that’s how you found out

he’s a massive fan of drawing you and loves to see your own drawings

he’s a huge fan of you guys doing literally anything and catching you drawing with some bizarre medium without fail

caught you drawing him once- and then a lot more times

luckily, you were wearing headphones at that moment, so he got to have a lil victory emote without you noticing before acting like he never saw anything

does a very obvious, obnoxious greeting in the most cheesy way to clearly convey he never saw a thing

if by some unfortunate twist he is caught watching, man panics and is like “Hoh! I- didn’t see you there?? what’chu up to??” play it cool and smile it off miles “Wow that’s- that’s crazy how you.. caught me”

he’s been caught so many times in the past and he knows that internal feeling of dread

YOU BOTH KNOW YOU DRAW EACH OTHER UR NOT SLICK

but anxiety am i right

will not snatch your sketchbook or whatever you draw on suddenly UNLIKE SOMEONE

completely respects your privacy when it comes to your drawings, he can relate too much

that’s not to say that he isn’t curios, he sometimes likes to tease about peaking but never would without permission

if you’re both into graffiti then he’s takes you to insane spots to tag, especially once you find out he’s spiderman

likes to suggest collaborating on pieces all of the time

miles is great anatomy practice, with all his funky spider-man poses

i cant actually imagine he would hide being spider-man from you if you were dating beforehand, it’s a different conversation if it’s a new relationship

but hey, young love, am i right ?

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

I’M GOING INSANE IM GOINGN INSANE IM GOING INSAN

"please forget your scarf in my life" | sacredshipping

There was simply no time to stay in one place for more than three days when the legendary beast he sought for could cross large distances in a single leap. Consequently, he packed light for his strenuous journey, and any memorabilia that he brought along was regularly accounted for before each departure.

Leaving Ecruteak was always an exception.

No, that wasn't quite right, Eusine pondered. It was leaving Morty that was the anomaly here.

Or: after another stay at Morty's home when he visited Ecruteak City, Eusine forgot one of the most important thing he possessed— a sketchbook containing drawings of the best friend that he grew to love. Who knew that something wonderful could be born from this life-changing mistake?

[spicycoffeebean]

hELLO!!!! i just wanted to come here and say i love your art so much, the way you draw characters is so cool and i am simply enamoured with your art style. finding your clausten ask blog a few years ago sparked my love for them and now i can’t ever stop thinking about them so i have you to blame for that (and i also could not be more grateful for it lmao ahwjdhejdhd)

you are just very cool, even though you’ve moved on to other fandoms for the most part, i still treasure all your mother works (and all your art in general!!!) your art is the best i love it. im not sure how to end this. but yeah 😎🫶 you are awesome OKGOODBYE

HELLO AND THANK YOU SO MUCH... I wanted to respond to your posts for ages but i'm old, crusty, and busy. I haven't drawn digitally in weeks but I found some time to do this for u.

I'm so very glad my blog that I made when I was 15 has brought some semblance to joy so many years later. I really miss them, I do. I see your stuff all of the time and I FROTH. I'm so glad Clausten is in some capable hands. I do draw Mother at times but I don't post it anymore... I'm still open to headcanons via DMs, but will I reply?? No clue. I post mostly on Twitter at this point, because keeping up with five social media accounts is exhausting especially when you rarely draw as it is. (Dropped out of uni and making better money working as a table games dealer) Stay in school to make stacks so you can leave room to do what you like. Times are tough and Im still using Clausten to cope 12 years later.

I put your art on my smart watch, amidst many drawings people have made me ;_; that's how much i've cherished it, but i've neglected to acknowledge how BEAUTIFUL and SWEET they look in your art style.

glad that overzealous and anxiety tired ninten have influenced some people in this fandom into good taste /lh

[dream0fschism]

Can you write soap fingering reader till she can't take it anymore im begging you 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

you see

i love johnny and i love fingering. perfect!

here you go honey.

Your favourite thing about Johnny had always been his eyes.

Your second favourite thing about him was his spontaneity.

He never failed once to take you by surprise with his sexual endeavours... and you never refused them.

You'd been sat in his lap, innocently, with one of his hands snaked around your waist comfortably and the other resting over one of your thighs. As he'd conversed with his friend Simon, and a few others who were visiting your shared apartment for drinks, you were happy to listen along whilst they exchanged stories and made their shitty jokes amongst each other.

And then you'd felt it, the sensation of Johnny's hand as it slowly slithered its way underneath the fabric of your skirt, and the warm fingers that were smoothing over the sensitive skin of your thigh.

Nobody could see it, the table in front of you both blocked most of the view - the side uncovered was fortunately unoccupied. The perfect opportunity.

"Now you're just being ridiculous," Johnny exclaimed, loud enough to snap you back into the room and acknowledge the conversation that had been ongoing the entire time. "Coming from the man who drinks fuckin' tea."

"Get your head out your arse," replied Simon, narrowed eyes sending daggers in your boyfriend's direction.

"Who doesn't drink tea?" Asked, who you think was John, the man with the moustache and cheeky face - as you'd noted. "The fuck do you drink to relax with?"

"Oh, I dunno, a fuckin' beer?"

The conversation made no sense to you, and you wouldn't bother to give it a second thought anyway. Not when Johnny's fingers had begun to rub circles into your clothed folds - still conversing with his work mates as if he was just casually scratching his head.

And you would be lying if you said it wasn't turning you on more. But the idea of being caught still caused tiny flames of anxiety to lick at your stomach, and you leaned yourself forward to rest your elbow onto the table with your cheek on your palm.

You stayed like this for a while, as the almost deafening sound of male discussion rang through your ears minute after minute. It felt like hour after hour when Johnny's hand didn't falter once, and you knew he was making sure you were getting nice and wet for him.

After a while you edged your legs open, subtle, silently urging your boyfriend to do more but he only kept rubbing, until the slickness at your hole had absolutely saturated the lace of your panties.

"Are you... feeling okay?"

Johnny jolted you with one knee, bringing your attention from the paintings on the kitchen wall to the man, Alejandro if you remembered right, who'd asked you a question. You must have made some sort of noise.

"Me? Oh - yeah, yeah. I'm alright. Just get little cramps sometimes."

Lies aside, you were far from alright. The man beneath you had successfully brought you so close to the edge that the hand on your face squeezed at the skin it could find purchase of. And then he stopped, whilst your eyes were doing their best not to widen, watering as two skilled fingered wandered beneath your underwear.

To cope, you had to wipe a hand over your face with a feigned nonchalance. Johnny had pressed two fingers into you almost immediately and pressed deep enough for his fingers to curl and massage at the spongey nerves.

"I don't know a single person who doesn't like Italian food mate," spoke the youngest man out of all of them, whose name you couldn't remember.

"We should definitely all go, then, it sounds nice, Gaz," John replied with a nod. "You'd come too, wouldn't you?"

Luckily, you'd made sure to be extra attentive to avoid repeating any mistakes. The question had been directed at you.

"Oh, yeah," you enthused, accidentally drawing out the word a little too much as Johnny's long fingers teased at your insides in slow, hard thrusts of his hand. "I'd love to come."

That earns your pussy the harshest slam of them all, and your eyes really do well up with bliss this time as Johnny continues his assault on your walls with purpose. You feel it building and building, the coil in your stomach tightening painfully as you squeezed your thighs together out of fear. You were not confident you'd be able to keep your mouth shut if you came.

You'd stopped Johnny's fingers from being able to push in and out, but they could still tease at your insides. You had no clue how he could do it; like clockwork, he rubbed with his digits and wouldn't stop until he knew you were just about to fall apart. And then his fingers would still.

He did this four times.

Until you tried to grind yourself down onto him in your desperate state, and he'd realised himself just how much of a struggle keeping still - and undetected by the others - was for you.

When your orgasm hit you, your only comfort was being able to bury seventy-five percent of your face into your hand as the muscles in your legs became rigid to the point of pain. Waves of pleasure wracked your frame, overshadowed the discomfort your fiercly clenched jaw was bringing you.

Johnny, after slowly inching his fingers out of you, had pressed a light peck to your cheek before he slid you off of him and paced towards the bathroom.

You could only sit back down into the chair and, with shaky hands, reach for the glass of wine you'd been neglecting.

[thecosmosdefys]

Hiii would you please write smth for simon with an s/o who has depression and anxiety disorder??:'( the details don't really matter, you can write it however you want and it's ok if you don't wanna do it… hope you're doing great and have a nice day💕

Simon Riley who helps his S/O with their depression & Anxiety

Pairing(s): Simon Riley x GN ! Reader

Warnings: Depression, Anxious thoughts, Anxious and depressive behaviors

Synopsis: How I think simon riley would deal with your anxiety & Depression

Author Note: Peekaboo! Tis I cosmos!!! I saw this request at work and decided to write it as soon as I got home, for right now I really only have the energy (as well as time because im about to head back to work) to do headcanons but I hope you enjoy them!! (their more like mini blurbs

I feel like Simon would 100% understand if you told him you had anxiety or depression. He wouldn't be the best at dealing with it but by gods he would do his best to help you with your problems! Like truly he would!

Say idk your room in your apartment is just... really bad. You havent left in ages, and you stopped texting Simon? He's there in an instant. Once he realises your super depressed hes like "alright luv lets get started" and he's helping you clean, wash your clothes, ect.

If you can't find the energy to shower he's drawing a bath and helping you slowly strip off your clothes. He slips you into a nice warm bubble bath and either slips in with you or helps wash you from outside of the bath. He cleans your skin and then does your hair for you making sure to wash it without getting soap in your eyes. He might blow bubbles at you to make you laugh.

If you can't cook or something and maybe don't have the energy, he makes meal plans on sundays, so he starts including you. So when he cooks ahead for the week, he also cooks stuff he knows is your favorite meals and then drops them off on monday.

Would definately invite the 114 over for a little suprise day spoiling you, expecially if he knows being around people helps you. He will plan a movie night and invite you over, and you walk in and all the boys are just sitting there eating popcorn and movie snacks. As soon as they see you its just a huge dog pile of hugs (they almost knock you over)

If your anxious in public he will gladly hold your hand and do all the talking for you. You don't want to order because your stomach is in way too many knots? He already knows what you like and he will order it for you.

Most dates he will try to keep at home if he knows that your anxious in public. You want to see a brand new movie but don't want to go to the movie theater? He texts you to come over one night and he has practically made his living room a movie theatre. Lots of blankets, snacks, pillows for a pillow fort, and a little basket for each of you.

If you have relationship anxiety he is definitely reassuring you all the time. its almost like he knows what youre thinking before you say it out loud? (I swear he's a mind reader) He can tell by your tells when your anxious and he's calming you down already.

If you have anxiety attacks? He's comforting you instantly pulling every coping skill he can out of the book. He is putting loop earbuds in your ears and then breathing with you. Having you name the 54321 thing, and everything. Even has a little sensory/anxiety kit ready for you on the go in his car. He is no stranger to anxiety.

[frecklystars]

I'm sorry to make a vent post :c I hate being negative but I haven't been online in a couple of months and this kind of explains why + I really needed to let this out somewhere. TW for mentions of self harm and suicide mention, this vent post is a little bit heavy.

i havent been online for a couple of months now except one (1) time, and then i left again, just letting my queue post as always. my cptsd/depression/anxiety has been astronomical levels of Terrible. going offline just made me feel so so so much worse bc this is where i normally self ship and post my art. not blogging about my F/Os, not drawing them, not editing videos/not making gifs, feels... really really bad. self shipping is my main coping mechanism and not being able to self ship makes everything feel 50 billion times more hopeless. so I should try to get back into that habit again

its july. its gonna be my anniversary w/ the two F/Os who breathed life back into me when i was at my absolute worst. i should be really excited to celebrate an F/O anniversary for the first time in two years, but ive been... so... fucking miserable. the last few months i have been back into My Worst State Of Mind Ever. i have been having really bad days where im slipping back into planning how to end my life and self harming again like i did a year ago. this isnt an everyday occurrence as of right now, and rn as im queueing this post, i am not planning currently. but every other day i slip back into those old self destructive bad habits, so it's safe to say my depression is definitely Worse. im trying to figure out how to uh, hang in there. because i can't stop the source of the Thing that is causing me to feel like my only escape option is ending my life. this isn't just my mental health/a chemical imbalance in the brain making me feel this way, this is entirely situational and out of my control.

i know the source of my problem and why i feel this way, and i cannot control it. i havent talked about it on my blogs bc i dont wanna scare anyone, and i will NOT go into details here, but i havent felt safe in a very very very long time. i contacted the authorities back in January this year, i am planning to contact them again soon, but im afraid they can't do anything for me until things get worse than they already are. it sucks that you have to wait until things are literally impossible to get through until the authorities even CONSIDER helping you.

i have just been trying to take everything one day at a time and vent to a few close friends when i need to, but this has been so unbearably difficult to endure every single day. ive been dealing with this FAR longer than a few months, but regarding these last few months specifically, i feel like i haven't been functioning like a person. every single second i am just,,, scared and paranoid, this is the only thing i am ever thinking about because im so, so stressed. i dont WANT to think about it but i literally am incapable of having any peace. every few weeks, something scary regarding my situation happens, and makes my anxiety worse. i cannot tell you how scared ive been. im so scared every day that this is going to kill me, whether it's the actual situation that will kill me, or my own anxiety/fear will drive me into making an irreversible choice. which! i don't wanna do! i genuinely don't want to end my life, i just - i feel extremely trapped in this situation and i've felt very very very hopeless about it for a LONG ass time, and that shit weighs on you over time

my fear/paranoia has affected my self shipping, and self shipping is my main source of comfort, i cant lose it. i keep losing it. ive lost so much already i dont want to lose my F/Os all over again. i keep thinking there’s no point in self shipping because my F/Os would betray me or harm me in some way. i know they’re imaginary and they can’t hurt me IRL but like, from a self shipping standpoint, i can’t stop fretting over all of it being a huge trick. like they’re pretending to love me so they can betray me later. i can’t get any relief, I am having panic attacks all the time, my flashbacks are worse than ever. I can’t self ship and I can’t... function. i'm so messed up from everything that has been happening to me, i feel like healing is impossible at this point. i really hope that is just the severe anxiety/depression/ptsd talking. i hate being negative, i dont want to have such a pessimistic outlook, but it's just felt so... hopeless. like there is no point. but what am i gonna do, not try to feel things with my F/Os again? what am i gonna do, not self ship ever again?? i really have nothing else to do except try my best every day to get through this. or kill myself - and i dont wanna go down that latter road again bc its messy and it sucks and its expensive when you fail and i have permanent scars from the last time i failed two years ago, and i! want! to! get better! i dont genuinely want to die, i just want to escape my situation! this situation i am in should not be worth ending my life over. but i am scared all the time and that hopeless feeling is so heavy and it's just getting harder and harder to carry for so so so so long

i have friends both IRL and online who are trying to help me get back into a safe situation again, but there is only so much we can all do. so i just have to keep taking all of this shit one day at a time and just hope and pray some sort of miracle gets me through this. its been years so i really dont believe theres a way out anymore but i am just! agh!! fucking angry and sad and terrified 24/7 and sick of dealing with this, so i will keep powering through every day even if i gotta kick and scream the entire time.

ok anyway! im gonna stay offline for a little while longer (this is queued, if anyone is kind enough to reply/send an ask, i will try to respond when i return) but i will come back slowly but surely sometime maybe this week, next week at the latest. i at least want to celebrate my July 21st anniversary :( thats my most important one this year. i really really really need to get back into the habit of self shipping even if i dont feel much for my F/Os atm. i refuse to just lay down and take this, i want to at least try to feel something again even if it hurts.

thank you to those who have been patient with me with replies; tumblr says i have over 200 inbox messages and 99+ dms since ive been gone. i will try to get back to people slowly but surely, its just probably gonna take me a hot minute. if anyone has the free minute, if you can just send me something like "everything will be okay" in my inbox, i would super appreciate it 😭🙏 and thank you to anyone who took the time to read my ramblings.

[inky-goddess]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you!!

Ive done this so many times before and once again I dont do chainmail so im gonna just tag people at the end

my partner

age regression! (It's literally my main coping mechanism with my anxiety lol)

gaming (video games, ttrpgs, etc)

drawing

writing

@kiwisaurusrexx @shower-racoon @voidgoat @a-small-rat-with-big-shoes @tinyfrogperson

@feathertailedcentipede @acesophiewalten

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hey Cas, this is my first ask so I don't really know how to word it, but I think I just need to put my thoughts down even if no one ever sees it.

To start, I'm and in eighth grade and it's my first year of actually changing classrooms and having different teachers for every class bc my school is weird, and I've always been told I'm pretty smart and mature for my age and I think it kinda puts pressure on me.

It probably sounds pretty weird but because my parents know I'm and my whole family including aunts and grandparents always got like some of the highest grades in the state and I feel like if I don't get good grades in almost everything I'll have disappointed them, even though rationally I know that my parents don't care.

The main problem I think is my Japanese class because I've missed heaps of school because I kept getting sick for the last term and I also had school camp and I feel really behind.

The rest of my class already had a test where they had to have a conversation to introduce themselves to the teacher and I missed that but I don't know any of the vocab for it anyway.

This afternoon I was just watching something because I got sick again and I just started to cry and take short breaths and I feel like I was on the verge of a panic attack for 20 minutes before ei wound up the nerve to start making flash cards.

Ik this is already pretty long but Im also worried about my friendship with my best friend who I've been friends with since year 1.

She hasn't acted any differently and she's probably just forgetful but I'm always the one arranging the catch ups (she goes to a different school) and I genuinely can't remember the last time she reached out to arrange a meet up and I'm just kinda worried.

Sorry it's so long I think writing it down has already helped me.

Thx.

Hi!

It sounds like you have a lot of pressure right now and a lot of things worrying you. Do you have any coping mechanisms to help let out some of that anxiety? I think it's really important for you to be gentle with yourself and take care of yourself by taking care of yourself, you know? Scroll tiktok, write, draw, play videogames, whatever makes you happy, but know that those things are okay and important because relaxation is important <3

You're also welcome to vent to me any time <3

[mrgladstonegander]

How will the characters be portrayed in DT47 compared to DT87, and DT17?

to be honest i havent really watched enough of dt87 to say 😅im drawing more inspiration from dt17 + the comics

I do have some thought-out differences for some characters though! :)

I'd do more characters but I don't have everything set in stone completely yet .

these links have more up to date information : phantom and the sorceress / specter of the past , phantom blot/rorschach specter

doodled this a while ago but scrooge / graham are different in terms of ... business practices. DT17!Scrooge is whitewashed (in the traditional sense) from the comics (dt87!scrooge moreso from what i know). but i personally think that scrooge's penny pinching debt collecting personality in the comics can still be fun (+creates conflict) but ALSO . personally. I don't really think it's good to say you can be the Richest Person Ever while still having good ethics. ESPECIALLY when said billionaire collects and takes artifacts from other cultures

Graham (dt47 scrooge) remembers debts extremely well, and always puts himself in situations where people would become indebted to him (even family). he takes contracts and small print very seriously. he also has the same issue of hoarding all his treasures in his house or money bin, and separates them by how useful they are to him (like, say, if there was a magical Papyrus that can be used to make contracts that Bind things... cough cough)

honestly i think that dt17!scrooge's aversion to magic felt slightly contradictory at times? considering how much he collects/uses them

i dont remember if it was ever said in the show, but while Graham likes adventuring, I don't think he does it just for the sake of adventure. He wants treasure, but he also wants to give the kids (dt47 donald/della/hdl/webby etc) an experience and let them travel because he remembers being poor and how many things he wasn't able to do. but with this mindset he doesn't recognize that it's his fault when they start getting bad coping mechanisms or tiring themselves out trying to keep up/impress him

but i think the most major difference between dt17 and dt47 is this; Scrooge built the Spear of Selene, and did everything he could to try and bring Della back. DT17's narrative, even with Last Crash, does not put the blame on him; he didn't really do anything wrong. but for dt47 i REALLY want to emphasize how many people Phoebe (Della)'s disappearance affected - and the lengths that Graham went to hide it. I made a chart a while ago that shows how Phoebe's disappearance affects people and Gyro/Beakley's equivalents (the ones with the red star) have specific gag orders that Do NOT allow them to say anything about it. The cousins (INCLUDING PERCY) only know that she disapearred, Oliver/Gladstone trusts Percy/Donald's judgement that it's Graham's fault, and Frankie tries to understand things from both sides with no avail. Graham forcing Archie to keep quiet about it does not go well at all, especially with how guilty Archie feels about building the rocket

tldr; tries to make people owe him so that he always has leverage, uses magical artifacts to build his business, has bad coping mechanisms regarding his childhood (that lead to him being adventurous, untrusting, penny pinching etc), and he really sucks for how much he's burying what to phoebe. ALSO i forgot to mention but he doesn't really have a money bin in the traditional sense. I want to give him the world's most complete coin collection to make him seem slightly more insane in a different way.

. ok realizing that this is really long and you're asking how they're portrayed and not just the differences. heres some quicker comparisons

(please read the strange case of dr jekyll and mr hyde)/ (the poor thing has anxiety because of valerie (beakley's) teachings)

this post is still consistent with what i have planned for team science + archie

[softfem-dom]

okay I know nobody asked and probably nobody has the same trauma as me for this one. But. BUT. I kinda, maybe, probably, have just made up an universe with five little army boys to help me cope with my childhood trauma and anxiety about the war. (i think those dudes already existed in my childhood mind cuz the other day I found drawings of these five soldiers, so I guess im just naming them).

Probably going to publish some thing about this thing, if you don't want to see it you can filter out the "5 men in uniform" tag.

[coyote-kiddo]

i was re-tagging some of my old posts and found this, so i figured i'd re-do it!!! (all at once because i do NOT have the memory to do it over 30 days)

i found petdre first via the aesthetic "babycore", and then slowly got more and more into agedre!! i also found out a while later that i had been involuntarily age regressing for years and hadnt noticed

my age when im small is kinda hard to pinpoint, but i would say somewhere between 3-5 most of the time!!

i dont have one, and i dont plan on getting one until im an adult (for safety purposes), but i have a few fictional cgs!! (stolas, toriel, and alastor are my biggest ones :3)

hm, i would say a day with one of my fictional cgs!! getting to play with the toys ive been wanting, color and draw, wear clothes that feel comfortable on my body, use teethers, bottles, diaps and pacis and watch my favorite shows without being judged or being embarrassed abt it :3 plus a nice warm bubble bath, baba of warm almond milk and a lullaby before bed!!

i have loads of sippies, a few bottles, a few teethers, a paci and one disposable diap as of right now, but i really really want a babyyourdoll classic round paci!! and also pull ups, mostly js for comfort :33 i would also like more silicon teethers bc they feel nicer than gel/water teethers heheh

i pet dream occasionally, not as often as i used to but still occasionally!! i petdre to an afghan hound, a kitty, a fox, and im considering trying wolf pup, fruit/vampire bat and deer :3

when i age dream, im not too much different from when im big bc my headspace doesnt change as much- im just a bit more childish and less embarrassed about stuff!! regressed me is wayy different though bc my regression is almost always negative- im typically more emotional, childish, clingy, and annoying.

i prefer drawing!!! i like to color also but drawing just feels so freeing to me :3

my moots!!! too shy to tag but i love them sm /p /gen

regression is almost always invol for me because of anxiety and trauma, its also usually negative which is kinda sucky

yepp!!

not that i can remember, ive used regression gear in dreams before but never regressed

this one is kinda tricky- im gonna say probably either apple slice or salteens!! i also really love juice, chocolate, graham crackers and cheese and crackers :3

yes!! i never really grew out of them, even before i started to age dream ive collected them :3

just my stepmom and my dad, i dont really think they remember though

bubs, kiddo, buddy, and little guy are my favs!! masc nicknames are sooo gender affirming to me as a fem-presenting trans man :,3

my regression is usually negative and involuntary, but nothing usually makes me "instantly regress"- its kinda a coin flip- but something that makes me feel smaller when i age dream is fuzzy socks!!

nope 😭 even if im able to buckle down and have small time after ive been involuntarily regressed it just kinda fades away

its okay, i cant really speak on it much bc i have most people i dont feel comfortable with blocked and i dont have any other socials. though i do hate when people stereotype and gatekeep it, or water it down to "fem, pastel, cute way of coping for skinny white girls only"

not a lot, but if i stumble upon one in the tags i might read it :3c

yeah, but i dont really feel comfortable being tickled

stolas goetia from helluva boss!!!! he is literally my dada guys /silly

my preference changes constantly, but it would definitely have a crib that can be converted into a toddler/big kid bed w a canopy and mobile, a sensory tent, a bouncer, a play area and a deer rocker!!!

not really, it makes it harder for me to stay small sometimes

i regress because of trauma and anxiety, i age dream as a coping mechanism for stress, gender dysphoria and missing out on my childhood :3

i almost always have to be listening to music when small, regressed or age dreaming, and my music taste jus kinda stays the same

just boundaries i set for myself- dont intentionally seek out my triggers, dont stay up too late, eat when im hungry, etc

when i regress, i get very very clingy and sad and scared, so i come off as very needy and kinda annoying (+ blunt because i kinda forget how social rules work), when i age dream im basically the same as when im big, just gigglier and more childish

maybe!! i havent tried out caregiving before but i would like to!!

im in the process of learning italian, so i sometimes watch kids' shows in italian to help practice and to make myself feel smaller!!