#im awful at catching them
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PART OF A BIGGER DOODLE PAGE. WHEN ITS DONE ILL TUCK THE LINK INTO THIS LITTLE X RIGHT HERE ----> [X] I REALLY REALLY LOVE THE TOM N JERRY DYNAMIC W EMIZEL N VEX. IMAGINE BEING SO SO HAUNTED BY A LITTLE GUY THATS JUST SSSSOO FUCKING ANNOYING.
#CW GORE#HEHEEH WEEEEEE I LOVE THEEMEMM#VEX JUST HATES EMIZEL SO SO SO MUCH AND I LOOOOVE IT. EVEN WHEN WORKING TOGETHER EMIZEL JUST FINDS THE PERFECT WAY TO#GET UNDER THIS DUDES SKIN. A VAMPIRE WHOS BEEN AROUND A LONG LONG TIME.#A VAMPIRE WHOSE COMMITTED COUNTLESS ATROCITIES AND SEEN MANY MANY TERRIBLE THINGS W A SMILE ON HIS FACE#HES A PROFESSIONAL!! HES AN ARTIST! HES A GROWN MAN THAT CAN HANDLE A LITTLE MISTAKE HERE N THERE!!#BUT THEN THIS LITTLE FUCKIN. WEIRDO. W ITS ILLUSIONS. AND TRICKERY. AND STRANGENESS. AND EVERYTHING HE SAYS IS SO SO STUPID#HES WACKY. EVERYTHING HE SAYS MAKES NO SENSE AND YET. AND YET. HE HAS FOILED EVERY PLAN. CAUGHT YOU OFF EVERY GUARD#HE'S MADE YOU PARANOID!!! CAMERAS EVERYWHERE. WE CANT LET HIM GET THROUGH OUR DEFENSES. LEST HE FUCKS UP MORE SHIT#HES JUST A REGULAR BABY VAMPIRE. THERES NOTHING INSIDE OF HIM THAT GIVES ANY CLUE OF HIS STRANGE MAGICAL ABILITIES. SO WHAT THE FUCK??#HES LITERALLY A MOUSE. MAKING YOU SHRIEK EVERYTIME HE SKITTERS ACROSS THE CORNER OF THE ROOM W HIS AWFUL LITTLE PITTER PATTERING. FUCK!!#HES SO SMALL AND SO AVERAGE AND SO SO STUPID AND YET. AND YET HE HAS UNRAVELED EEEVERYTHING AND TOOK DOWN THE STRONGEST VAMP YOU KNOW#SO WHAT THE FUCK????#I LOVE IT WHEN A SCARY VILLANOUS CHARACTER IS REDUCED TO SOMEONE WHO JUST WANTS THE PROTAGONIST TO LEAVE THEM ALOOONE. TO GO AWAYYY. PLEASE#HEHEHE WEEE ILL POST THE FULL DOODLE PAGE LAT3RRRR I GOTTA FUCKIN UHHH FIGURE OUT WHEN IM CATCHING THIS STUPID GAY BUS#I ALSO NEED TO FIGURE OUT HHOW MUCH ALCAHOL IM WILLIN TA DRINK B4 I GO HOME. I HOPE YALL ENJOY THIS ONE. I LOVE U GUYS
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There will not be a single moment next week in which I’m not running around doing something
#full time studying / volunteering at the refugee center / volunteering at two clinics#literally ab to have a meeting ab shadowing a doctor who’s researching ftd dementia in like 50 minutes#organic chemistry research 5 days a week bc ur bitch is trying to get published#hitting the gym 6 days a week. I’ll probably have to move it to mornings soon#meal prep#trying to snag a lowkey part time job#trying to read 30 minutes before bed#somehow have 2 fit a social life into this#I’m excited bc I finally feel like my time budgeting abilities are being put to the test BUT holy fuck .#studying will be my no 1 priority always. literally catch me doing anki cards in any pocket of free time I have#but I better live up to the challenge of juggling everything else too#ik I got this. and these are all things im choosing to do. not things I have to do#and I love being busy so it’ll be so fun#just had to be in awe for a second bc I used to admire girls who’re like this. and I am officially about to be one of them#p
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assigning asgzc genshin visions:
angeal: geo??? im actually not sure but geo feels like the best fit for him, or possibly cryo
sephiroth: electro just feels right in my soul but i also feel like anemo would fit too, idk i feel like he vaguely slightly has similar vibes to scara (i can’t quite explain it but i make vague parallels between them in my head, im not saying they’re actually anything alike)
genesis: i wanna say pyro so bad because it fits his whole aesthetic, but i’m actually gonna say hydro because hydro has a lot of the pretty men :) he also generally fits the same vibe as some of the hydro characters
zack: pyro strictly because the first pyro characters that come to mind are klee and bennett and i think he fits in there just fine
cloud: anemo! he vaguely fits the vibe that some of the anemo characters have, and the pattern of characters with anemo visions having a dead friend that heavily impacted their lives (im so sorry i know its such a shitty and overused joke but that’s not what im trying to do its just that cloud literally fits the pattern to me)
#this is all based on the vaguest association my brain makes meaning none of them hold any weight or are accurate#would you guys still like me if i admitted that i was a genshin player 😔#im finally getting over my 2 year genshin burnout and catching up on archon quests and now im hyperfixating again 😭#this is like my slightest attempt at testing the genshin fandom waters on here lol cause it’s absolutely awful on other platforms#genshin impact#ff7#ffvii#final fantasy 7#crisis core#angeal hewley#sephiroth#genesis rhapsodos#zack fair#cloud strife
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tams azula is sooo fascinating bc while canon azula doesn't really show her age at all like she's completely desensitised to so much shit 'she is fourteen' is not a justification for ANYTHING both in her own mind and in other people's, in tams she has zuko. and yes the world has been abundantly cruel to her but zuko hasn't. he's basically raised azula and he's done so in a way that she's allowed to show her age, but she still only shows her age in very azula-esque ways. there's no reluctance to see violence like you'd expect from a fourteen-year-old, and like ive said before, that means zuko can't play on that reluctance in order to shield her, but he still wants to shield her from that violence because regardless of what SHE feels about it, as the eldest he knows fundamentally that she shouldn't be seeing certain things no matter how well she can handle them. and seeing zuko effectively PLAY azula in order to protect her is so interesting and complicated and fun
#and also a little heartbreaking bc it's the 'you protect azula but who protects you?'#like in order to shield azula from these things zuko is metaphorically standing in front of her and seeing them himself#as if he's not only sixteen and a child too#but yeah taking azula's canon traits and manipulating into the tamsverse is soooo fun#like the example that inspired this post is how canon azula is logical NOT cruel#like time and time again she follows only the logical route and even actively avoids the cruel route#e.g calling off torture in the boiling rock bc she knew that he was telling the truth and therefore continuing to torture him was illogical#im not saying azula is averse to/incapable of cruelty i just hc that she genuinely just thinks it's stupid#just like any other unnecessary act would be considered stupid. if it's not logical or being used for a greater plan then what's the point?#and tams azula STILL HOLDS THIS TRAIT except because i lean more into her age in tams bc she's been given the freedom with zuko#to liberally be a CHILD without any consequences as a result of that simple thing#her intense logic actually becomes a certain naivety on azula#like she cannot comprehend other people NOT coming to the conclusions she comes to#and that expands to needless cruelty. like she wont factor a person's cruelty into her calculations#because in her head all she needs to dismiss that calculation is 'excessive cruelty here would waste time which is illogical'#she assumes everyone is as smart and to-the-point as she is so when they ARENT and will actively waste time just to do dumb shit#it catches her off guard and she DOESNT PLAN FOR IT so it can really fuck them over sometimes#so this is one instance where zuko has azula beat despite it being STRATEGY aka azula's strong point#bc zuko's immense cynicism and assumption that Everyone Is Awful doesn't hold up against logic 9 times out of 10#but the one time it does is the time azula gets caught out#i just think tams zuko and azula's dynamic is so fucking interesting im so clever for that tbh#twice as many stars
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o_O <- me realizing i will still be on tumblr when i have kids
#like its a natural consequence its not a surprise#i just realized i will undoubtedly still be posting.#my gf and i spent like two hours yesterday catching water beetles to put in my bio jar#(which i sealed july of 2022 and havent added anything to since still full of plants and little shrimpies)#but i was like aw. i want to make my kids do this. and was planning in my head summer projects to have kids do bc summer learning is#important but i Hated the workbooks my mom made me do as a kid#so having them design scientific observation projects is a good solution i think. working brain and hands#ANYWAY i was like i should post about this on tumblr.#and then was like wow will the girlies relate to me preemptively planning activities for hypothetical children. i dont know LOL#anyway does anyone want to see videos of my beetles. im naming them all after glee characters#the shrimp are vocal adrenaline
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sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg
#i was justttttt thinking that aw it's so sad that navratri music is playling everywhere and i don't have friends to go with#like last year atleast i had tuition sorta friends but now ive isolated them too it sucks#but i was like well it's okay ill do it when i grow up celebrate every festival i didn't get to in my house because we just never do#and then she calls and she's like let's go this club jahan every year famous hota hai full celebration#and i was like ehh i don't want to i don't even know how to play and ill have to convince dad for raat can't we just#go to a cafe or something dopahar mein uske liye i don't even need permission#and she even agreed but she sounded sad and disappointed about it so i was like well fuck it you want to go club na#and she was like yeahhh so i was like aagh okay and i asked and we're going tomorrow!!!!!#and it's so ridiculous like i just say i don't want to go but it's actually so exciting to go someplace other than a cafe!!!!#and i was complaining to her ki okay ill go but i won't dress up and five mins later me and mumma are making full outfit with dupatta#style decided jewellery she has saved for years that are specifically navratri types and she's like we'll get my blouse altered it's fine#you know being sick has really given me perspective on my parents#im not going to hate my mom anymore i never used to growing up i always thought she was brave but helpless#but a stupid day in 12th i realised when we were talking that technically she COULF get divorced she just#doesn't want to because she'll be alone and she thinks we're growing up and leaving anyway so why should she let go of financial#stability for us. which is wild to me because girl you can't buy anything you want without his permission so i don't understand what's the#point if he's rich or poor but whatever whatever she's been raised this way etc etc#but anyway being sick really made me realise who the real monster is😭 all dad did was shout horribly at me all the time#and was like don't you dare take meds they're fake this is all just junk food stop eating it and you'll be fine. when i was literally#having 103 FEVER.#and mom was the one who was making me different drinks juices cutting up fruits staying with me as i get my blood drawn#checking my fever sote jaagte#like wow i literally wouldn't have gotten better if it wasn't for her and i couldn't believe how attentive and nice she was being#like yes i understand she just thinks this is her duty she's just playing her role a mother a housewife but still#idk i just realized that okay atleast she's good at being a mother dad isn't even that why am i feeling good about him when his love#not even love his politeness is so fucking conditional#and mom healed me even tho i told her about clubbing and drinking lots of alcohol she's kinda against it because she's seen#horrible things in life family yucky men but still she understands ans trusts my sister mostly and know we just do it for fun and she#wasn't even mad!!!!!!! like wow ooay#moms love is actually not conditional for the first time in my life i felt like if i fall maybe she could be there to catch me and dad wld
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Empresses in the Palace ep 16
"And now she dares to take away my Persian Ink!" Hard agree, my darling Hua Fei. Screwing your man is one thing, but fucking with your brows is another!! ✊
but babe, why u want to live with a baby??
Lmao look I know its A BABY but it's a fictional one and I'm amused that her palace is so crap at taking care of it. My career girl is just NOT the maternal type. Drugs the kid with crushed sleeping pills; "It works just fine on me." lmaoooooo
ffffuvk she's looking ragged in front of the emperor GURL let that baby go. Neither of you are having a good time.
Zhen Huan, I know the emperor is your dad's age but this fickle dude that might kill you or your besties someday is not the DILF protector you need, in metaphorical OR literal thunderstorms.
Empress savoring the new girl being humiliated by the new new girl 💅
While Zhen Huan plans for the long game by serving up Ling Rong. She's in it to win it now. Definitely feeling disconcerted about matchmaking her friend with her husband but willing to do it so they have a stronger backing in the palace. The first sign for me tbh that she could be empress material. And tbh for once the Empress isn't laying it on thick. LR truly has a celestial voice. Consort Yu supposedly was admired for her pipes but she has nothing on LR. The way she looks back. Yaaaasss always leave them wanting more.
That half-sister is gonna become a real problem.
me trying to picture how u draw eyebrows "like distant mountains"
ep 17
Prince Guo is not hot but not grandpa. He's also not the source of humiliation & suffering for a busload of ladies. I'm sold! yeah, I ship it. Please bang in despair at your wasted lives at least once, thx.
Hua Fei taking a big swing to frame up Zhen Huan by poisoning the favored baby. But it's not actually that risky, because her brother is impeccable armor.
Duan Fei is the real MVP. Everyone knows she's lying but the emperor clearly respects her and isn't willing to embarass her. No more than he's willing to severely punish my gf Hua.
Hope Duan gets her revenge.
Ep 18
So the emperor totally knows Hua Fei posioned the kid that he actually likes, but General Nian's skills trump all.
I'm honestly not sure if Zhen Huan should be trying to push the emperor to not reward Hua Fei. He's gonna do what he thinks he needs to.
Half-sister Huanbi is getting on my NERVES. And finally ZH's, thank god.
Prince Guo is so chill. He just strolled by like, hey crying servant, what's up? oh, somebody dissed your look? you're doing amazing sweetie, don't worry be happy. (Exit stage left.)
I think I love him.
Our protagonist with a BIG WIN. (crowd sounds) 👏 👏 proved half-sister is a traitor and her nemesis finally annoyed the emperor enough that she'll miss a promotion.
Girl, u know I love u. You're the only one for me. But Hua Fei, darling, you really need to properly space out your scheming. It's too much. The man needs some time, space, and calm to properly ponder how much he loves & appreciates your brother.
Ep 19
This episode should be subtitled "The Tale of Two Loves' or '2 Ships For The Price of One'.
First she risks it all to sneak in to hold hands longingly and shed tender tears with her Mei Zihuang. Then romantic coincidental rescue by Prince Guo and a late night boat ride with poetry & literature musings.
And I'm winning because I ship both of them.
Not sure how I feel about Half-Sister Intervention. Huanbi's situation is fucked and in a different drama she'd be the revenge-seeking protagonist. But she's also dumb as hell to want to join the harem and give up the chance to escape to a normal life. She's seen what a hell this place is. Ultimately, she has reason to resent ZH and their family. And she has a dangerous secret. What if she flips again? Just get rid of her ASAP. It's life & death struggles over here, no space for second chances.
#empresses in the palace#cdrama#i binged yesterday waiting for Love Song for Ilusion 2 weekly ep to drop#now today i can catch up in peace#the soothing thing about horror for me#is that i know most everyone is fated for a bad end#it removes stress and tension from me#im just watching these lil guys on the screen have hilariously awful things happen to them#oh look its a series of unfortunate events 😯
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love that danny boy is like a deeply emotional song about death and ancestry traditionally sung at funerals but my introduction to it was fucking bobs burgers so now whenever its brought up all i can think about is OOHHH HARRY BOY THE PICKLES THE PICKKLLEES and god forbid i ever have to go to a funeral where its being sung
#why are the bobs burgers songs that i get stuck in my head always like objectively awful 😭#like i love them still but u will never catch me getting sunny side up summer stuck in my head#im singing shit like Harry boy or it sure would be nice to have something like a mom#txt#bob's burgers
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Spood house update was a success. I feel so, so bad for scaring them tho. 😭 My poor babies. I planned to add a little more ventilation, but they were so upset I decided to do it another day. For now they get dark and quiet.
#sprinkles and dustbunny#sprinkles kicked so many hairs he should be bald#hard to call him drama dave today tho bc it wasn't just dropping a bug in#i couldnt even catch them im such an awful mommy#tarantulas
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just remembered i'm going to be 20 this year can everyone give a moment of silence. teenager was so endless and it's going to be over before i know it this is my life and it's just flying by and i feel like im only ever just incidentally moving through life and like i'm never doing all i could be doing never feeling like i'm living my life the way i'd be living in it if i really cared but i don't want to try to change that bc rotting in bed is so appealing lol
#except when i hang out with or talk to friends that's the only time i feel like im alive#and it's not like an i feel like im not doing enough when im working my ass off legitimately doing nothing lol#but id rather just rot in bed and have no work ethic and not make time to shower like a. just an awful aimless person LMAO#<- he worked so slow today like he always does and messed shit up and has to go in early to try and catch up and he's so mad about it#working with a partner stresses me out bc i want to do things and then i worry im cutting them out of it and also doing it badly and im#gonna ruin it for both of us and they could've done it better and they're going to hate me and i've never done anything right whateverrrrr#i want to live in a room where i can do my little crafts and learn things at my own pace and hang out with friends and go to events all the#time. and i feel like im a bad person for that because everyone has to participate in society in SOME aspect part time or volunteering or#whatever. the make text post button is like therapy for me i like to imagine this is what i'd say if i had a therapist lol#alex talks
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every time i've gotten into a popular series or franchise i've always been disappointed by it because like. its so hyped up and i watch it and find it mid and it appears we are not watching/playing the same thing
#reasons i wont like. get into ace attorney or fma or anything else#and by popular i mean like. ubiquitously popular. like an 'everyone at least knows of it' type#like ik enstars is popular especially in asia but in the west its a lot more niche#for whatever reason one piece is more niche ime than naruto or bleach despite arguably being bigger and literally still ongoing#and then jjk. god help me jjk is awful now#i was going to say idk if jjk is at that level but i've had easier times finding merch for that than some series here#so its certainly up there.#umu not to say its not good but i just find them being so hyped up leads to a lot of disappointment especially#since i didnt get into them at the same time as everyone else ie during formative times in my life#in middle/high school so it holds a completely different context for me being in my early 20s#anyway. idk where i was going with this. im not not into popular media/anime specifically#obviously. i run a semi popular one piece blog.#but compared to other things i am certainly less drawn to popular series#and find the uber popular ones have. declined in quality recently#what is going on in bsd even these days i should catch up. no i shouldnt. someone tell me when kouyou shows up again#the only redeeming thing in that series is my beloved kouyou you dont understand#and chuuya but mostly kouyou#but if its not just me and 20 other bloggers on this godforsaken site then i dont want it#shay speaks#again this is. just about my personal taste dont try to take this out of context so help me god
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unfriendly reminder to humans:
animals dont exist for you.
#literally no part of the job description for animal is like 'oh and its your life purpose to serve this human in whichever way they want'#if you cant appreciate animals complexities and individual personalities etc and instead choose to only view them through your selfish#self serving lense- fuck you#animals exist to be animals in the wild ecosystem. thats like. their number 1 purpose. its only humans who've decided that we're entitled#to decide their purpose when we catch them.#aw your new cat doesnt like you and doesnt give you the cuddles you wanted? newsflash: that was never its job. thats what YOU wanted.#do you see what im trying to say? so many of yall see the world through the lense of what YOU want.#stop idealizing your selfish desires and actually try to understand life from their pov.#the longer you treat animals as a means to an end. the more likely you'll mistreat them and ignore their needs.#which will reduce their numbers#and then humans go 'arghh how could this happen??' idk maybe its your cold detached approach to animals#where they only exist to serve whatever purpose you've decided for them#whether thats pet. food. or 'tools'. all of which takes away any of their agency#as if they're somehow inherently lesser than you.#you've created a situation of dependence. make it a good one at least and treat your cat right.#and not like a doll you dress up n shit.#be thankful your animal chooses to stay in your life.be grateful for what they provide for YOU too#bc they're doing you a favor by not going back to business as usual in the woods.#humans have gotten way to comfortable considering themselves the 'owners' of animals and not as their companions or at the very least#a gift from the earth. as if all they are is property. as if all they are is a tool. and thats all there is to them.#yall will only regret taking animals for granted like some of yall do.
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My dogginess always manifested in my dreams, but since there's some new stuff in my real life my dreams are getting more interesting too. Today I had a dream that I visited my cousin and her bf again, and their cute friend was also there. We keep kinda low-key flirting irl, and I keep thinking about him so not surprised he's in my dreams sometimes lmao. In this one, we all were just hanging out, I think we were all playing/watching someone play Subnautica? But the important thing is, he treated me like a dog person. There was still a flirty vibe between us, but I was getting pets and scratches and was allowed to rest in his lap. Like that looked like how I'd like to be treated in like, romantic situations or whatever. It was cool
#i looove dreams where im a doggy#sonetimes its literally being a dog#sometimes some other creature#sometimes a human that has dog behaviors#sometimes im a dog/creature and someones pet which is even better honestly#god i remember one drean where i was a human but partially dog like a therian but treated more seriously and could do more#and there was some huge weird hospital full of weird mysteries#and it turned out that in the underground tunnels under the hospital there's a secret ward specifically for beings like me#where they experiment on animal people#and tried to turn them into nomrla humans which wasnt physically possible aithout doing awful damage to us#and they tried to catch me even tho i wasnt even admitted to the normal part of the hospital#i had to try and save all the kther animal people#bonkers#anyway#today was a nice chill one#just flirting with a guy who respects my doggyness no questions asked#therian#bee buzz
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i was talking to my mom about my job sucking and she kept pushing like well every job sucks. and kept pushing like girl if it all sucks the same why are you leaving urs
#personal#it’s just annoying cause like what are you arguing against. you actively want me to get a different job#also just let me complain. i’m aware every job sucks don’t remind me i will kill myself over that thought. but like extremely aware#but some have to suck less#like i imagine there’s a job where i don’t work ten hour shifts with one 15 and lunch and am expected to only spend 10 minutes per day#to piss#and i want a mom that can comfort me beyond kicking me out when i call out#i’m scared about how much i hate working and how awful it feels#i’m terrified about how i’m supposed to live the rest of my life#my room has been messy for over 9 months#i go home and just stare at my phone or nothing and suddenly it’s 2 am and i have work so soon#and my days off i spend catching up on sleep and wasting them#i’m just so tired and scared and scared of how apathetic everything but fear and sadness feels#and it’s just like this forever and i don’t have a mom that will hug me or try to make me feel better just#if you want to die you should kill urself and everything sucks everywhere it doesn’t get better#LIE to me im#off the fucking deep end
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drakengard fanbase is truly insane because aside from the one time a dude called me classist bc i said watching a playthrough isn't the same as actually playing the game (crazy, but a one time thing, every fanbase has it) like. ive been in fanbases where ive been harassed over liking a ship but this is the first ive ever been in where ive been harassed over liking a character. what is up with that
#gu6chan's musings#drakengard#drag on dragoon#the more i recall my time at accords library the more im like 'how the FUCK didn't i realise that sooner that shit wasn't a joke' bc it was#genuinely so fucking awful#but luckily i havent gotten as much harassment since starting this account!!! honestly though#ppl always like to rag on large fanbases for being toxic but I don't think ppl really recognise just how BAD smaller fandoms can get with#the 'us vs them' mentality where it becomes 10x easier to establish 'norms' and spread news and groups etc etc#like if you like an unpopular character; ship etc. in a larger fanbase you can ALWAYS find a small niche dedicated to that particular thing#but in a small/medium sized fanbase its like congrats now everyone hates your guts and knows it too djdjfjdj#that said I know ill get control of my works back eventually bc if I dont catch up to them i at least know they cant keep going forever lmao
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Oh. RIGHT. Florida is the Australia of the US. Right...
...came back from walking the dog and there was a spider a little bigger than my hand sitting on the wall right above my front door. UGH.
It was nice as winter and spring lasted. I remember why I hated being in non-town/city/beach FL. It's the spiders and the rattlers and the boar (which I haven't seen yet but can always somehow hear...)
#taks speaks#tw spiders#so. my bf panicked immediately and i wasn't going near it#so we went downstairs to ask his stepdad who decided to yet again come in bursting in like a redneck koolaid man#with a damn 2x4. again.#he did it for the rat#this thing RAN. straight hauled ass upon the sight of this guy and climbed out a hole in the screened windows#i have yet to see this guy even accurately smash something with that 2x4. it's clean and usually the same one#but fuckin hell that thing was as big as the dog's head#and she was more focused on going back downstairs and eating a toad#which gave her the massive wet shits for three days the last time i accidentally let her even get close enough to lick one#that was this weekend. im still catching up on sleep and lack of working from having to clean this up every two hours#she likes to pounce the toads. the toads are poisonous.#agh. summer is here and all the awful creatures are out#the toads look pretty damn cool for the record tho. i keep poking them with my shoes to get them to move and they're neat fuckers#so do the rattlers but christ....
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