#im aware this isnt relatable but it is *something i be thinking about*

[13atoms]

ive said this before but writing witcher stuff while being the same height as Cavill is like ‘you rolled your eyes, brushing past the COMPLETELY SAME HEIGHT Witcher’. i love you sm short people but fics that are like ‘he dwarfed your tiny hand in his’ always feel less relatable, im writing for the amazonian bitches

[welldrawnfish]

So these last few days has been.. Turbulent. DIFFERENT

I think I may be a System? Infact I KNOW I am a system at this point, but Im also not ready to accept that. Well a part of me isnt, and the other parts of me are like… uh duh of course you are. 

*A system in this context refers to the collective consciousness under the DID / OSDD Umbrella, I dont know the correct terminology in all of this, so im so sorry If i I mess up. I don’t necessarily want to give myself a label, there's .. brain scans and stuff I can get to prove it. And I need those, thats the only way I know this is real. But for now, for my own mental health I am treating it as if it were.. “real “ And I dont really know… what to expect…? I want to find something, ANYTHING, on I guess.. Systems waking up? But I cant find it. So I’ll just do this here Im gonna dump out all our thoughts onto some comic pages and we will figure it out.  I had a bit of an awakening roughly.. 5 days ago, and for the sake of convenience gonna use Plural/System terminology - There are alters, I have met them, the have names and personalities and some of them are really fuckin annoying i just want to punch him in his TEETH

Anyways, since the alter awakening moment, my brain has been in TURMOIL parts of me accept this, parts of me dont, i keep feeling like my face is like shifted 2 inches to the right and everything gets fuzzy in the real world. Not that these alters have names like.. Files are getting sorted  into these proper figures and everything is getting explained and figured out. And its making me feel like I'm not me anymore?

Like I always would argue and barter and fight with my own thoughts, but that's the thing, they wer thoughts, voices in my head with just like, distinct personalities. I just saw it as a different part of me?? Figured that was normal.

But now they are.. stronger ? OR maybe because i'm more aware of them and the personalities I can tell whos out now and like.. Obviously they are happy to get some facetime with the world properly?? But like.. Am *I* just aware of it, aware of them now, aware that it is not just *I* but *We* and so noticing it more, I'm resisting even harder? We feel more fractured than ever.

I have a good friend helping me out, another system, I owe them everything, maybe my life. (PLEASE FOLLOW @transpanda-1 BTW THEY DESERVE IT) They had a few amazing tips, but I cant keep bugging them about every anxiety on my mind thats not fair, so I’ll ask the whole community.

I guess what I want to know is.. Like is this normal? Do all systems go through this? What should I expect in the future and how do I make this more streamlined and stop.. Fighting it? I guess?

I thought I finally had myself figured out, just be the girl who makes the funny relatable trans comics… it was simple.

[fatmaclover]

theres something to be said about how mac still holds such a childish adoration for his parents after such a long time. how literally its shown to us by the fact that

mac always slicked his hair back as a child, when he still had contact with his father

he stops doing this into adulthood, but later in life, once mac interacts with his father again, he starts slicking his hair back again

he doesnt stop. slicking his hair back. until his own father walks out during his coming out performance. the guy he put it on for. only after that does he completely stop styling his hair that way

not to mention the constant refusal that his mom (and dad) could be anything but perfect, the way hes so desperate to do good by them, viewing them as the way to measure his success...

and. yeah thats. something.

the internal denial that his parents treated him poorly, the fact that its his primary instinct to deny that his parents suck, the constant dismissal of his own issues relating to family because his whole life hes been told that "other people have it worse". the way hes internalized that so hard. the way it takes his dad walking out on macs coming out performance to him for mac to stop blindly idolizing some guy whos threatened to kill him

the constant fear of his own father, while also believing him to be the coolest bestest guy ever. the way he always assumes his father is gonna get violent when actually talking to him, but sings nothing but praises when away from him

the fact that he still calls his dad "daddy" even.

i mean you cant really blame him for not fully growing up in some areas huh

its not even that i think he doesnt know that his parents treat him horribly, it just really seems like he wants so badly to believe thats not the case from years of having his cries for help ignored or made fun of. he cant have been treated poorly, because charlie was treated poorly, and his baggage isnt nearly as bad as charlies, so clearly macs home life wasnt bad.

i think thats proven most of all by his frustration with his own family at times, it really feels like theres some underlying issues. they can very quickly manifest as frustration and anger, but honestly its probably mostly sadness. the way he reacts to his own mother really reminds me of how i interact with family members i have grudges with but have to pretend i dont. im not actually angry at any of these people, im mostly just exhausted by them.

he very clearly is still aware of the neglect he faced as a kid, to me. he knows his home life was severely fucked up, hes just never been able to express that, so hes coped by just. pretending that it didnt happen.

and realistically i dont know if he could ever properly acknowledge that his home life was fucked and his parents suck. maybe hed acknowledge that his dad sucks now, but it wouldnt have been that bad when he was a kid and wasnt a fag. right? he was loved then. his mom still did a great job raising him, and he really loves her, and he was raised with all the love and care a child needs.

[chuuya-kisser]

thoughts on bsd 114.5

(this is all over the place sry and yes i took most of this from what i reblogged and edited it here)

spoilers below

WHAT THE FUCK???? TRIPLE SINGULARITY?????? HAS THAT EVER EVEN HAPPENED BEFORE??????

THIS CHAPTER FUCKING KILLED ME AND SENT ME TO THE GRAVE

ALSO IF THE THING IN THE ANIME WAS THS TRIPLE SINGULARITY THEN WONT THAT MEAN THAT BONES ALREADY KNEW ABT THE PLOT DEVELOPMENT WHEN THEY WERE MAKING THE ANIME????? THAT MEANS THAT ASAGIRI HAD THIS PLANNED OUT?????? FOR GOD KNOW HOW LONG????? THEYRE IN CAHOOTS

AYA NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED IM LITERALLY CRYING FOR HER SHE CONNECTED SM WITH BRAM IN SUCH A SHORT TIME AND NOW SHE LOST HIM TOO. IN FRONT OF HER. REMEMBER THAT THE SAME DAY SHE ALSO SAW JOUNO BEING MURDERED/VAMPIFIED. AND BRAMS LAST CONSCIOUS THOUGHT WAS TO PROTECT AYA. GOODBYE IM DYING.

yeah skk always looks pretty but IMAGINE DAZAIS STRESS LEVEL. its probably skyrocketing atp bc he's aware that almost the whole agency is at the airport. where bram is. which means where fyodor now is. which means the whole agency is at risk rn and DAZAI KNOWS THIS. like he already mentioned to sigma, he's doing all this for the agency right? SO IMAGINE DAZAIS SHEER STRESS AND WORRY KNOWING THAT SOME OF THE ONLY PPL WHO ACCEPTED HIM COULD VERY POSSIBLY BE- GOD FORBID- KILLED. pls stop give them a fucking goddamn BREAK ASAGIRI. also is there any way dazai's not being in fukuzawas recollection of the agency related to this or is that just a coincidence

this mfing smugass asshole. fuck fyodor. and his ability. and him in general. how dare he even TOUCH bram. how dare he take over his body. HOW DARE HE.

i said this before and ill say it again. FYODOR FOR THE LOVE OF YOUR EVER LOVING GOD STAY. DEAD. also i agree that dazai is the only one who can kill fyodor bc dazais ability is so far universal. anything that is an ability will be nullified by dazai. so fyodors ability should also get nullified by dazais. but dazai is technically on the other side of the world and fyodor rn. How exactly would he get there????

but my question is how would it affect fyodor? like, his body swapping ability gets canceled out. what does it do?????? send him back to his original body thats dead?? kill him on the spot? thats the real question here

i dont think fyodor will want to become the singularity bc imo his style of working is from the shadows. i dont think he would want to switch his own physical body to something so... blatant? he would probably prefer it as his pawn

WHATS THIS BITCH EVEN TRYING TO DO????? WHAT DOES HE WANT TO FUCKING ACHIEVE oh. my. god. if he can control all vamps thats gonna be HORRIFYING. but in the anime end, isnt akutagawa back to normal? hes not a vamp anymore. sooooo im just theorising and grasping on straws but could fyodor's taking over bram's body possibly reset everyone bram had converted to a vampire? thus why akutagawa was back to normal in the anime

also i was thinking abt fyodors ability so theres NO WAY that dazai killing fyodor with his ability could possibly.....yk what im talking about. make dazai. yk. i dont even want to say this.

so basically endnote: that was quite a lot and this chapter left me in Shambles.

[pestorik]

can you please expand on deuce/riddle ??? im rlly curious abt them tgt in your AU,,,,

(if you have the time i would also love to read abt azurid & mallerid :D ! no pressure though! im mostly interested in deurid ^^)

the riddle ship trifecta...

i enjoy them bc i think riddle really needs a calm presence in his life that makes him feel like he can act in ways he never had the freedom to do before, without feeling judged or made fun of. whether that is acting childish and silly or just expressing emotion freely. he's obviously really sensitive to being teased so he needs someone who is ok with that and just finds joy in his joy.

i relate to this a lot bc i myself am a very sensitive person, and get emotional really easy but im also very cynical and dry, so i think ppl see that contrast and find it funny. which is fine, but i get hurt or annoyed really easily by teasing bc i think what i really want is for someone to see how easily i get emotional (like crying at almost every movie i watch) and rather than seeing it as smth weird and funny, they recognize my empathy as something good. i want someone to see the value and worth in my emotions, no matter how trivial they seem.

and i think riddle needs that too. deuce isnt super smart but i think he's really earnest and riddle would appreciate that about him. he shows a lot of self awareness in recognizing how his past actions hurt his mom, and realizing he needs to be proactive if he wants to be a better person. very few ppl are willing to admit when they are the problem. he's just a very soft guy, but like, passionately soft. he wants so bad to be good. and i think he would want so badly for riddle to be happy, it would become really important to him just like his mom's happiness.

malleus is super honest about his intentions, which i think riddle needs bc his lack of social skills leave him anxious. he probably would get too frustrated having to play games and guess feelings. malleus just has a super calming presence and riddle needs that so bad. i think they are both pretty awkward bc of their upbringing so maybe they could find comfort in each other, knowing there's no judgement.

azul is none of these things lol 😂 i do NOT think these 2 would be a perfect healthy couple but i enjoy their dynamic. riddle is sensitive ofc but hes also super smart which is why i like the thought of them together. the two top students, not really in a competitive way, more like they recognize each other's weaknesses but also highly respect each other. to the point that they wouldnt ever make a move against the other. i could see them having a more loving relationship but in my mind they are more like a power couple lmao. like two powerhouses joining forces. i do think seeing riddle trying to overcome his own trauma and be a nicer person could inspire azul to do smth similar, realizing that if he likes and respects riddle, there must be some value in kindness without reward.

none of these would be canon in the AT au unfortunately, at least not in my mind (you can do whatever you like with it tho, it also doesnt mean i wont still talk/draw about it). there would definitely still be interactions among them with plenty of room for interpretation. obviously the most between deuce and riddle bc they are both HL.

i could see an episode where riddle recruits deuce to help him repair one of the elephant guardians (since deuce is good at repairing stuff) and they become closer. bc deuce used to get up to a lot of trouble he also has a lot knowledge of some of the rougher parts of the kingdom (im referring to deuces former crew as the spoiled fruit gang) and probably accompanies riddle when he needs to go there. riddle might sometimes go to deuce for advice on his relationship w his mother, since deuce is close w his mom. it would be cute if deuces mom came to really adore riddle and gave him a lot of the experiences he didnt get w his own mother.

[the-s1lly-corner]

If it's not too much trouble, could I request a Caine x reader that remembers their name but not really anything else about their life before the circus? It's ok if not though, I don't know if this is able to be written or not in any way, so it's understandable if you don't.

Caine x reader who remembers their name but nothing else

oooough i really want shrimp hiss hiss i loooooooove shrimp. not food related but i also kind of want to get a shrimp tattoo but im scared im going to regret it later in life HISSHISS notes: reader is gn, short post, can be seen as romantic or platonic cws: reader is going through it, remembering only your name and nothing else can do things to people

he doesnt fully grasp why you remembering only your name and nothing else affects you this much- you remember more than the other circus members so that means your special!

him telling you youre special doesnt really... do much to make you feel any better...

you feel bad for feeling like this, because everyone else doesnt remember their own names.. thats such a huge part of someones identity, you know?

guilt, perhaps, even though there really isnt much reason for it

moving on to more light stuff, he thinks your name is really pretty and interesting

sometimes finds himself just saying it, its almost like a verbal stim

maybe its because its so peculiar that you remembered it that made it stick out to him more than the others...

he doesnt really understand why you and the other circus members freak out over not being able to remember your lives before, this is mostly due to this disconnect... in relatability...

makes up stories on what you were like before you entered the digital world, each speculation becomes more and more outlandish with each theory

sometime you feel like hes making them ridiculous on purpose to try to make you feel better

hes trying, you think, so that counts for something.. even if hes not always the most aware or sensitive to the situation

[liquidstar]

speaking of greece and also oc side projects, i was trying to do worldbuilding on the "godless" ocverse. still in the concept stage but heres what i got

what i've already established is that this is a fantasy world where all of greek mythology is real, but the gods have abandoned the earth for a long time. after almost 2000 years, we're in the equivalent of the 1800s/early 1900s. the general conditions (as well as designs) are based on real life greece during that era. the main difference is that its much more peaceful- part of the reason im setting this in an alternate world is because im not doing this to tackle ottoman occupation, the pontic genocide, or world wars 1 and 2. a lot of that stuff is heavier than what i wanna do.

but i am still trying to tackle one thing about greek culture, specifically in relation to the gods. the history of hellenism is still something very deeply ingrained into the country's culture, and yet... idk if you guys have noticed, but the country has been christianized (the fact that the gods absence lines up w the anno domini era is on purpose). my goal isnt to romanticize ancient greece by any means, there was a lot wrong with it and im not one of those "roman empire" guys lol. but what i wanna do is get into that weird "gap" in greece's modern identity vs its ancient one, via the feelings of the characters and being abandoned by the gods and the bygone age of heroes. (and im aware ofc that a big part of that IS the heavier side of the country's history, even if i wont directly be tacking the aforementioned real world events)

MOSTLY i want it to be a fun romp though, i wanna pay homage to the adventures of heroes like odysseus, jason and the argonauts, perseus, heracles, etc., who would all be REAL historical figures in-universe! (well, heracles is a demigod) most likely ones the protagonists would idolize in their own adventures. im referencing the cambelion monomyth/hero's journey as a format for that, but i don't intend to lean too heavily on it either.

all that being said, i made a map :)

i chose the name "ilia" from the ancient greek name for troy- "ilion," which is also the namesake of homer's iliad.

the region is split up into different territories. all the territories still worship the gods equally, but they each have one main major sanctuary to focus on the olympians+hades (and i included both hestia and dyonisis, i think it would be funny if both region didnt consider the other one a true part of the lineup). the position of the symbols shows you where the major sanctuary is located.

again, all regions worship all the gods and have different temples throughout (smaller towns and villages may have their own temples dedicated to more specific deities) however, the major sanctuary in each area is what defines it because the hiereus or hiereia of these temples acts as a head of state (of course, a world where gods are real is a theocracy). the requirements for a hiereus/hiereia are to be gifted by the god of the temple, and be a dedicated scholar of their domain. theyre selected from a large group, through a democratic processes, usually leading for life.

i have names for each reason but theyre not set in stone so ill keep those on the back burner

i dont have a lot of specifics plot-wise figured out anyway, but wanted something to visualize the idea. itll put me on the path to figuring out exactly what that could entail! after all, even with the gods gone, plenty of supernatural things remain. enchanted/cursed relics, hallowed ruins, ancient monsters, the underworld, olympus, oracles, and, of course, the gifts!

[cannibalise]

emmm i rly. rly rly rly rly rly rlr yly rly rly rly rly rlryu rly like shrike and i talk abt him a lot privately to my friend so i wanted to ummm. make a post i guess? about him.. and similarities to corax and stuff because hes so Strange and fun and i love him

ok well first of all hes in. the rg codex supplement (8th) and ik hes mentioned in the space marine codices but i dont own them and finding pdfs isnt the easiest thing in the world (if anyone has the 5th and 4th ed ones id like to read them ToT or at least just screenshots of the raven pages or smth) the legends: shrike novella, and the short story shadow stalker. hes probably mentioned in some other stuff but as much as i want to hunt it all down because of my issues of the mind, i dont think i will be able to. coz its hard to find this stuff digitally and i dont rly wanna spend the money just to learn that hes mentioned like Once and its something i already know. i also wanna say im not like umm. well i wouldnt call myself new anymore but im definitely not like a 40k veteran. just laser focused on necrons, raven guard, and night lords. so if ive missed stuff or gotten something wrong then, u know. im getting thru stuff. i also thought abt ummm. posting screenshots of book stuff to back myself up but i dont know if thats. uhh. idk. is that too much. i dunno. i HAVE them and can get some other specific ones if anyone wants them. and obviously i can say what book theyre from and get the chapter number (not page number tho i read the chapters as big blocks rather than page by page)

anyway. the thing that sort of captured my attention at first abt him is his self destructive humility. or likeeee. almost what looks like a naked desire to die in battle, but not for personal honour or glory ('honour' as a concept in rg itself is honestly a very interesting topic to me anyway). hes just so driven and committed to the cause that if him dying to accomplish a goal or finish the mission is the easiest and most efficient way of doing that, then he thinks about it and commits to it and noone can talk him down. carefully considered recklessness is what i started calling it. he genuinely thinks about all the pros and cons and then does it anyway because his own life as the price is so easy for him to commit. and i think its super fun that hes aware of this shortcoming and its part of why he wants to find someone more suitable as chapter master (this is mentioned in the codex supplement). but SPECIFICALLY because the old master of shadows, severax, did a suicidal assassination attempt that failed and shrike looked at that and knew he wouldve done the same. because he has. in his novella. THREE times against the SAME ORK. and somehow just keeps Not Dying. silly guy... hes silly... i love him so much ToT i LIKE it about him because it feels so strange considering what hes normally like. hes hotheaded. hes highly motivated and driven and doesnt lose hope (again an interesting topic for rg coz of all the 'hope is pointless' stuff). ud think someone like that would have a rly strong drive to keep living and a survival instinct. and he does to some degree but the selflessness takes over or something. but a selflessness tht prioritises them all as an organisation? i mean this Should be normal for imperium anyway and it might be more common than im thinking, i honestly havent read a alot of imperium stuff coz i dont really care about it ! shrike to me is like 'hatred of the imperium leaving my body when i see a cute emoboy with weird issues in his head'. im a sucker for dudes that are quiet bt have that sort of burning passion inside and the fact that its entirely on the behalf of his brothers is too much. also its not totally related but something abt him in the supplement that i LOVED is an anecdote about imperial fists and iron hands having an argument over a tech relic powering a planets shields and shrike comes in and destroys it without either of them knowing so that theyre forced to stop arguing. its that simple logic. hes the type of guy that sees the shortest path to getting stuff done and just does it, regardless of the fallout. no overthinking or figuring stuff out slowly, u see an opportunity to solve a problem u take it right then and there. cut the bullshit i want you etc etc. i love this too in the novella coz even before hes promoted to captain hes arguing with his superiors about how they should keep going no matter the cost and take the shortest and most dangerous path. and another thing. he refuses every attempt at assigning him some honour or award or whatever and like u just KNOW its coz hes like 'well it wasnt me it was all of us together' or something. kayvaan 'i love my bros so much i could (and will) die' shrike

which i guess leads me to ummm. this part! similarities to corax. im STILL getting through horus heresy stuff but the more i read the more similarities i notice but theyre all like. weird picks. like i get that they probably wanted to make a chapter master that felt like corax, for multiple reasons, but they picked some Weird traits to carry over. like i dont think i would call corax hotheaded at all. hes very restrained and definitely does anger (especially when it involves the lycaeus-born ravens and the raptors) but hes too good at keeping a cap on it. to the point that i think this is ultimately his downfall. tho thats, personally speaking and im not like a Massive corax fan i just know him a little. im not staying over at his house for him. im getting chased out of his sons window in the morning instead. ...anyway. the point is that hes much more reserved and restrained. but because of that he also has the belief that there will come a time when hes able to withdraw and let someone else lead the ravens while he does... whatever he wants i guess? i havent seen it mentioned which is a shame coz it would change things a lot depending on what he intends to do. anyway this is mentioned in a lot of the things ive read with him actually. this is a trait he shares with shrike. but because of the differences in circumstance its connotation feels really different. like corax is a primarch, hes sort of marked out no matter what he does afterwards, and hes not rly like ummm. an arts and humanities guy like some of the others. on top of not even realising that hes reinforcing the tyranny that he fought to destroy on his own world. but thats a different topic entirely lol (one that i LIKE because i love tragic irony and the way he seems oblivious to it coz at the time he was so excited over meeting his new brothers (this is from deliverance lost)). anyway god that was a tangent, the POINT was that shrike also wants to give up his role and let someone else be master of shadows because hes too aware of how his recklessness isnt suitable for a leader at that level and has split the chapter up to hopefully have them all hardened and capable and able to take over for him. and then u just know hes gonna go back to trying to kill himself for the cause all the time until it finally sticks. shrike has that clear goal and hes picking the shortest path to it as usual. whereas corax broods a little more and maybe overthinks things. so its the same self awareness and the same wanting to withdraw from their positions but for totally different reasons, and i rly like the contrast. also its just Comical how corax has to tell his legionaries to simmer down and that "victory is its own revenge" instead of running off to kill some specific guys you hate. and then on the other side u have 'shadow captain maybe this isnt a good idea' 'shadow captain you will die' 'shadow captain ple-' and hes gone. hes already gone. hes jumping into his own death again. and shrike DOES HAVE corax's levelheadedness but theyre used to nefarious ends of him thinking about the stupid thing hes gonna do and then doing it anyway. hes using all of his traits from corax for silly things.

anyway sorry i think im done i might kill myself over the embarrassment of writing this later we'll see please dont laugh at me im a sensitive gay little emoboy and kayvaan shrike is my passion

[redactedgender]

songs i associate with redacted audio characters - speaker & listener edition

oh yeah baby, we back for round two

im not gonna include a singing voice claim for everyone this time around, but some of these might have them in there. also, im only doing three speaker characters this time around because im also including three listener characters. but, i will include four songs for the listener characters. just for funsies.

!! CW FOR SUI/ MENT !!

geordi

hate myself - dodie

; my poor sweet geordi. my little man. this song is far too relatable enough as is, but i have a feeling our resident tetris boy would relate very much to this song. specifically the chorus—“when you go quiet i hate myself” is almost literally about how geordi felt when he was first getting used to cutie’s silence. i can imagine how vulnerable it was for him. he’s getting better tho! which is exactly what i wanted!

voodoo doll - 5sos

; so a bit of a weirder pull for him, i like the idea that in the days after meeting and getting cutie’s number, his thoughts were just plagued with images of them in his mind. do i think they put them into his head? no, but this was early cutie, so it could have been possible. but i like the idea of one of geordi’s thoughts just going all conspiracy over why he kept thinking abt them.

wish me luck - wallows

; another sad one for our tetris boy, and this might even be sadder than the dodie song. i love wallows, theyre probably in my top fave artists, and all their songs are sooo good. this song just screams geordi to me. the genius lyric website says that this song is about “the narrator [is] asking for support and validation from a loved one during times of struggle and self-doubt, whilst talking alot about encouraging self-awareness and speaking out about inner conflicts and problems”, which. i mean. yeah, thats geordi and cutie alright! i imagined this when they were slowly starting to talk to each other again but were still really nervous about what the other would say.

━━

sam

leaving lonesome flats - dierks bentley

; so this song is. alright so its from the second trolls movie. BUT HEAR ME OUT OK. this is my sam singing voice claim and i think its damn near perfect. i would have done bentley's song “what was i thinking?” instead but i think the trolls song fits better. something about running and coming back, etc etc. listen, this song is just really good, and i think it makes sense for sam. that’s the only explanation i can give here dhsjdhjd

she keeps me up - nickleback

; i was not a fan of nickleback for a while, and now im kinda vibing with some of their songs, but this has such big sam and darlin' energy to me. like, look, darlin' is canonically hot as fuck (as confirmed by porter), and i really just think this song fits really well with their dynamic.

believe me - james and the shame

; so we're all in agreement that sam definitely has some kind of religious trauma (most likely catholic/christian) right? anyways, i only recently got into gmm last year, and when i heard this song i was like “there’s no shot that’s rhett from gmm”. knowing that rhett writes this from the perspective of someone healing from a religious past that was harmful was really empowering, and i think that it fits sam really well.

━━

blake

absinthe - idkhow

; this song is just cult leader energy. i know he isnt a cult leader really, but like. i mean. sometimes i think closeknit might see blake as some kind of deity or god to worship. but i can imagine blake lowkey liking having that kind of power for one reason or another.

how i’d kill - cowboy malfoy

; this to me suits blake because of the tone shift in the song. where it goes from slow and almost eerie to a bossa nova jazz type swing to it. to me, it reflects how blake is really like: the way he was around sunshine vs bestie, like in his “two sides to a yandere” audio.

if i killed someone for you - alec benjamin

; uh. well. i had this song on the playlist before the “for you” audio. and then the audio happened. so. blake-core i guess??

━━

darlin'

vampire - olivia rodrigo

; this is such an obvious fucking song to put for them but also i do not care it still fits. this is about quinn, obviously, and i think it especially hits hard after listening to their second vid with sam and how they mentioned finding another vamp that quinn had slept with. like, was this another manipulated vamp? this song just hits differently when you think about darlin'. and also, even if it’s overplayed, the song slaps.

paul revere - noah kahan

; there are definitely other noah kahan songs on my tank playlist, but this one is just such a good depiction of who they are. them coming back to dahlia, people recognizing them but them saying they’re not from dahlia, how dahlia doesn’t feel like home, like—something about that just really hits me in a way that i love.

howlin’ for you - the black keys

; this is my “darlin's go-to karaoke song” song. imagine them kinda drunk, feeling themself and having fun, singing this in front of their pack, and especially in front of sam. like it’s such a good song for them.

best friends - grandson

; this is here because in my little universe, darlin', david & asher were in a band as teens, and they covered this song. but also, this is such a teen!tank song. this was probably playing while they beat up tires in an abandoned parking lot. like i imagine david wasn’t as much a rule breaker as asher, milo, amanda, christian, & tank were, but you gotta admit their friend group were probably hellions in their own right.

━━

honey

disco man - remi wolf

; this is a good song that fits honey in my eyes. it’s sort of like about guy from honey’s perspective from earlier in their friendship/living situation. learning that the guy who won’t stop flirting with you with the cute smile is a creative writing major probably made honey regret crushing on him asjkgfhjks.

lego ring - faye webster & lil yachty

; ok this actually is inspired by oh, baby, baby by lovelylonerliterature because that is one of the best guy/honey fics i’ve read in a while, but i think honey learning to be softer and be a bit silly with it is so wonderful. also, i like the idea that guy would joke propose with something silly like a bread tie ring or a lego ring but honey would fully take it as a promise for the future and just break guy. what can i say, i like making our pizza boy flustered. and so do they.

“listen to your heart.” “no.” - cheekface

; this is just based on vibes. guy sings most of the song, honey only sings the “no” lines. i’m a genius.

soft bitch - rio romeo

; awww, honey you sap you! no but seriously, i imagine that honey often thinks about how much guy has changed them for the better. and they haaaaate it. y'know that one tiktok audio where someone’s like "he makes me smile—OH WHAT THE FUCK"? that was honey when they realized they had a crush on guy. and this song kind of embodies that too; honey isn't used to being sweet, but being with guy has made them into a sappy person, which they never thought they would be, and how much they actually enjoy it.

━━

freelancer

just existing - daysormay

; so not only is this my favorite song at the moment, this is also my freelancer theme song basically. the lyrics "it always took too long to learn how to slow down / chasing shortcuts and serotonin touchdowns" and "maybe i lost drive / i'm searching every day for relief / and chasing a break that i don't really need" feels like our resident (and chronic) overworking deviant. this also works when you think about freelancer singing this and each of the verses matching with one of the D.A.M.N. crew boys.

my body - young the giant

; a song about feeling the need to overwork yourself to get better at something because you have a fear of failure and falling behind, in my freelancer playlist? how ridiculous! /j no but in all seriousness this song is a perfect depiction of their need to keep pushing, keep working, to be perfect. i think even when they know they’re good at something, they have to be better. they need to be better to prove themself.

empty bed - cavetown

; so this is a bit more of a depressing and sad song for freelancer, but one i think still makes sense. this reminds me of early s3!freelancer, still healing from the inversion and terrified of everyone they love going away. how they grew up, how they hide their pain as best they can so they don’t bother anyone with their problems, but how they dont want their friends to deal with that kind of pain. how they don't want the D.A.M.N. crew to be in pain, but was so hesitant to let the others know their own pain.

babyface - artio

; so i found out abt artio recently, and when i looked them up on tiktok and saw the lead singer, rae, i immediately said “oh, that's crow!” (for those who dont know, crow is the name of my freelancer-sona). this is very specifically for my freelancer-sona, but i think it stills works for canon!freelancer. how their people pleaser tendencies can make them so quick to change themself for others but how they’ve slowly grown to be more confident in themself.

━━━━

this took. far too long hdsjhd

i am still considering sharing my spotify link on here, so if you want to see which of the redacted audio character playlists are on the app, pls let me know!

[kijosakka]

alejandro,,, so fun <3 OKAY I HAVE MANY AN IDEA SO TO BEGIN WITH: panopticon

as established, panopticon is a Thing in this au mainly as a theme (but also a very very big influence in the creation of this in the first place).

panopticon itself refers to an institutional/prison design wherein a central guard tower and the construction thereof makes the prisons unable to tell if theyre being watched at any given moment; thus, self regulation.

^ dramaturgy, as an AU, focuses on noah acting ‘in accordance’ with the cameras in a genre-savvy adjacent manner; he self regulates. the ‘central guard tower’ to him is the audience.

to alejandro, however, the audience is not a variable. his competing does not factor in the audience and public the way noahs does; instead, his focus is shifted to his castmates.

to slot it in now, im talking about alejandros perception of the audience and the perception of him thereof (which, this and the above will be compounded upon with the stuff below further explaining alejandros facade/masking).

^ again, the audience just isnt a necessary variable to alejandro (at least, beyond *his family). playing in the manner he is, orchestrating and manipulating, you just cant fit in the time to placate the audience to make them love you. the more important thing is the opinions of his castmates, who are the real variables impacting his win.

and so, in short, alejandro is polarizing. people love a villain, but there is still the in-universe distinction of it being a reality show. it is real people; so, some part of TD’s audience will account that and denounce alejandro for being so comfortable in manipulating his peers so shamelessly.

[*his family, as seen in canon, seems to be something he is acutely aware of. he would be aware of how he presents himself, and would do so in a manner pleasing to them.

this is not to say hes unaware of the audience. he knows theyre there and speaks directly to them in the confessionals in a shifted manner (exaggerated/nitpicked for the purposes of this AU).

< where most characters speak about their competition to the audience, alejandro often speaks directly to the audience. tiniest distinction but i feel i should make it and emphasize it]

and now,, his actual facade; what it portrays, what it hides, and the reasons/motivations.

^ restating another post (ty ophe), alejandro has a mask of a person hiding antagonism. he acts like an idealist version of his actual person; kind, sensible, intelligent, considerate. athletic, helpful, goodhearted, compassionate, attractive to boot. taken to an extreme, holier-than-thou and patronizing. diminished, way overcompensatory, or maybe doormat-ish.

while this version of noah comes off as uncanny valley because no real person is so detached and lifeless, no real person is so perfect either. alejandro would trigger the same bells but to a much, much lesser degree. more like there were pieces of a puzzle missing rather than something distinctly wrong.

because alejandro seems like a person, he portrays depths and facets to himself (while all positive), and interacts with his castmates like how people interact with people.

it is, again, a the veil of an idealist person hiding antagonism. i don’t think alejandro is a cartoonishly antagonistic, unremorseful supervillain character (and hes not really portrayed as such in canon, but just to say), but he is absolutely not the perfection he portrays himself as.

now is a great time to add that alejandros mask heavily relates back to the expectations his family pushes on him; not only is it good socially (for the purposes of the competition) but theres probably a sense of validation there aswell (if shallow, because its still not an appreciation of the ‘real’ him).

^ and thats a Thing as well, the ‘real’ alejandro. flawed and imperfect, able to be irritable and snappy and meanspirited with arrogance hiding the cracks of overwhelming inferiority. as a person, that is, in intent for the game hes, well, an eel. conniving and slippery and manipulative and sly and vindictive and unapologetic.

and as for reasons,, staying in line with the burromuertos ‘high society’ position in this AU, maybe it was something like a way to prove himself; he works the social game and shows business promise because of it, and brings a hefty sum of money home to his family that he earned.

and his facade is an easy one, not only a way to show a sense of professionalism and keep the burromuerto name ‘untainted’ by blatantly unsavory behavior similar to someone like duncan, but a way to keep his castmates none the wiser while the steals the money from under them.

BUT within the au itself things umm do not go to plan as noah makes it his mission to unmask alejandro as just as fake as he himself is.

which brings about the topic of a very specific cast relationship: noah and alejandro

as,, yk,, the backbones of his entire au (ok its more like nervous systems. noah is central and alejandro is peripheral) i want to save a full digging into their relationship and developments for another post entirely (probably going episode by episode until pre london focusing mostly on alejandro, and then another post after i figure out the actual events of WT going through the changed canon)

but to just go through it very quickly; noah doesnt trust alejandro and sees through him. alejandro eventually catches wind of the fact that noah doesnt trust him, and i imagine it would trigger a wondering of how? spurred on by noahs whole ‘no substance’ thing.

and besides, nobody has anything on noah despite him being their castmate going on 3 years now. and now that he’s thinking about it, what does he himself really know about noah in the same way he knows things about the rest of the cast? that’s interesting. *

^ i imagine alejandro would be wary but not worried about noah knowing, simply because of the passive nature he’s read of the other. < poor alejandro. it is not nearly that easy.

[*interesting,,, i will cover that more on the actual post going ep by ep for their relationship. because i do have Thoughts]

[digitulworld]

theres a lot of things about bob that interest me and i want to know more about. because i am a lunatic. warning for dozens upon dozens of paragraphs about my favorite evil man

first of all. his pendant. obviously he lived through multiple gunshots and getting run over, but because the pendant was injured, he weakened. once it was removed, he died. i doubt he'll come back nor will the cult want him to come back. then again we have no idea what role he played in the cult or if he was in it just for the immortality

he does Not strike me as the type of guy to willingly involve himself in the supernatural, and in his concept art we see that he doesnt wear the robe all the time, instead hes in his boys & grills outfit serving food to the other members. tldr hes just the cults lunchlady

i do NOT know if bob thinks of himself more highly than others. i have a very weird theory that bob eats human flesh because he knows he cannot succumb to any illness that follows from it thanks to the pendant he wears. it might be why hes so eager to eat candy n shit off the floor without thinking twice; he thinks he'll be fine! he can indulge as much as he wants and flaunts his knowledge on how dangerous consuming human flesh is at the same time, or how common drinking blood is, or how to kill someone quickly and painlessly. he seems like hed be a showoff... he knows too much. or maybe hes always just been really interested in meat and eventually got a little Too into it

also i am aware eating humans at all can make you sick, cooked or not, but i like to believe that because he puts the meat in greasy burgers, people assume whatever sickness they get from it is from the fact that its fast food, and not assume theres human meat in whatever they ate

related to this, theres gotta be some connection between him starting off most of his lines with "did you know..." then having one of his last lines start with "yall dont know anything!"

second of all... his connection with lila also interests me. when it comes to the fat + thin thieves, we know theyve been trying to collect images and items from her husband who is implied (or confirmed) to be part of the cult. therefore they attempt to break in multiple times. bob does the same thing with the intent to kill, more than once, and im wondering if he plans to kill her for consumption, or for the cult. that or he does intend on killing her, and has permission from the cult to do so. orrr hes doing all this against their wishes...

its hard to pinpoint any specific motives from him other than he just wants to Eat. he gets easily sidetracked when trying to target someone, distracted when attempting to corner and kill someone, and frustrated once he begins to realize after a Long day of effort that he will not get what he wants

this isnt to say bob is an idiot. he clearly has experience. he uses the kids motives (wanting candy) as a lure, and does what they want (hide & seek) in order to come across as "safer" for them to approach, before he eventually gets them. it just feels like he treats this like a game. he spends so long savoring his time stalking and playing with the victims, then gets upset when they manage to escape. what did you think was gonna happen man

i say all this even though this is your typical villain behavior stuff. a villains gotta act a little stupid and egotistical in order for the protagonists to win yknow. but its still fun to tie this in with his gluttony, since it shows that not only is his desire to eat others his motive, but also his biggest downfall

all this considered, once the pendant was removed, i have left to wonder if it was just the gunshots that killed him, or the arm he ate not long ago

also something something the bullet holes on bobs chest look like the heads of the cult robes. did they know

TO SUM EVERYTHING UP: i cannot be typing all this for a guy named bob this is ridiculous

[etherealspacejelly]

Everyone keeps telling me I’m really loud but I don’t think i am I don’t understand

do you perhaps have autism or adhd? i dont want to assume anything and im certainly not diagnosing you with anything from this one ask, but if you are following me (and/or asking me for advice) you probably at least suspect you do, right?

i only ask because lack of volume control can be a common experience with these disorders. i know i certainly struggle to understand how loud or quiet im being sometimes. your volume might sound perfectly reasonable to you, but to others it may not be! this is not necessarily your fault, even if you are neurotypical, sometimes we just get carried away. but it is something we need to be mindful of, especially when we are in public spaces or areas where loud noise is inappropriate.

i completely relate to what you are feeling, i often apologise instinctually for being "too loud" even when that isnt the case, because i have been told i am in the past and now im hyper aware of it

if this is a common problem for you, perhaps you need to communicate with the people in your life who are telling you that you are too loud. tell them how their comments make you feel, communicate any struggles you may be having, and maybe create some kind of code word or signal they can use to let you know if you are being too loud in an inappropriate context, without specifically calling it out and embarrassing or offending you.

the thing is, as much as i would like to tell you "dont let the haters get you down! be as loud as you want!", oftentimes that just isnt considerate behaviour. we are responsible for the way our behaviour impacts others, regardless of whether it was intentional or not.

if you are unable to control your volume for whatever reason, that is not your fault and i am sorry that you are struggling. open and honest communication will likely benefit you and the people in your life who are making these comments, and will hopefully bring about more understanding between you.

i wish you the best of luck!

[ghostlyvoidshark]

Hnnnghhdhdh thoughts of the sillies forever haunts me. Someone please worsen my brainrot I need to write something. The words wont word right but im trying.

The best I have right now is thinking about how the skelebois would react to someone with tourette-syndrome (because I have it and self indulgence in creative works is great.)

Please let me know your ideas and stuff about this and if you want more guys with other stuff or more reacting to this!

Sans

Very patient with you and honestly would probably not care unless something is timed funny / a silly response. I personally wouldn't be offended and would probably laugh at myself too. Like something happens - maybe he made a comment about something like the price of a ketchup bottle and you reply with a tic like "yippee" and you both end up snorting. Maybe it even becomes an inside joke. "How cheap is it?" / "dont worry its yippee certified."

Wouldn't ever antagonize your tics. He may joke (after a convo about boundaries and if youre genuinely okay with jokes) but he doesnt echo you / encourage you to tic for humors sake or anything else.

He doesn't personally understand tics and how it feels to do it but he understands pain and would 100% be there to help you out when / if you have painful tics. If you allow it he'll get you soothing items and distract you if it will help. Just let him know and he's got you.

If you develop a tic related to him he'll lowkey find it endearing. Like he isn't sure if its because you like him or if it's just a coincidence but he smiles a bit wider when you do it. (Stars help him if you develop a pun related tic like repeating his or saying one)

I usually have happy tics (probs something tied to stimming but it feels like a tic.) So i can imagine if you tell him the related tic is because youre happy he would melt on the inside. Especially when he realizes you echo him because you think hes funny. He has buried his face in a pillow to hide his blush after you leave. Papyrus has teased him for this.

Has on occasion made people uncomfortable for antagonizing you. Like glaring or making pointed jokes to rude people. He'll try to call them out first just in case they don't realize they're being harmful but if they don't care then He'll make them.

Papyrus

"ARE YOU OKAY?"

"Yeah, its just -" *explains tourettes*

"OH! OKAY! :] "

Literally as simple as that. He doesn't draw anymore attention to it or really notice it unless you bring it up. Like he just writes it off as a thing that happens and adjusts quick.

If you're okay with it he'll inform people you have it when they get confused. He figures it must be tiring constantly explaining yourself, but worry not! He loves sharing information and explaining things! Especially when its helpful! Not to mention when the topic can educate others on how to be more respectful and informed on others disabilities. So he sees it as an all around good thing and wouldnt be bothered at all to help. (Also he isnt going to just announce this about you, only saying things in convo if ppl ask)

Also, even if you prefer he not say anything, he will educate himself on the subject so he can be a better help and have a better understanding just in case the subject ever comes up later or he meets someone else with tics. It also doesn't hurt to be aware and conscious of these types of things!

I feel like he's respectful enough to let you finish your sentences but if you struggle really hard he might try to help. He'd gently ask a question about what youre trying to say and suggest words to help. He wont do it again if you ask him to stop - hes not doing it maliciously after all. He just doesn't want you to feel frustrated with yourself.

Is a tiny bit (actually very much) hyped when you echo him or have a tic related to him. He asks if its a good thing (like not a stress tic or smth) and if you say yes then he kinda taps his feet / jogs in place and squeals like an exited fan. Says soemthing along the lines of "I AM HONORED TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING YOU DO TO EXPRESS POSITIVE EMOTIONS!"

Awe and if you copy his laugh? Like echoing it when you're happy or smth he is beaming with pride like he's the sun itself. Because!! His laugh!!! It makes you happy and you want to do it with him!!! Kcjdjsns

Actually surprisingly (or not so surprisingly) helpful with painful tics and tic attacks. He is very good at getting you what you need to soothe you / make things less painful and stressful.

Would lecture someone for antagonizing you.

Red

Unusually patient with you finishing sentences and stuff. He kinda just sees any stutters or interruptions as part of the sentence. Like if someone were to get sidetracked or mutter something - he sees it like that. Sometimes he gets frustrated if you struggle to say something for a bit but its not at you. Its at the fact that he isn't getting what you mean when you try to explain without the troublesome word or if you continue to try to say it and it doesn't click in his head.

His immediate reaction is to side eye you but he doesn't make a big deal out of it. He'll probably comment on it like "you gettin' possessed?" But after you explain hes like "oh." And backs off. Might make some jokes before even processing that it could be offensive. Like not jokes about you being broken or negative stuff (hes trying not to be so rough around the edges lol) but just puns about the tics and jokes about glitches or something.

Probably would be the most ... "normal" about it. Wouldn't really ignore them or treat it like its a sensitive topic. Will point out when its funny (in a non harmful way), asks about them sometimes, and makes small comments here and there. For example if you make a weird gesture he'll tease you about it saying stuff like "castin' spells?" Or "I agree" to something you said that makes no sense.

Never thinks to antagonize your tics. Like yeah, he jokes, but he just doesnt think about it or think to avoid it. He just doesnt.

Gives mean looks and snaps at people who do it. He'll be nonchalant about it at first like "hey man, fuck off with that." But if they keep on he'll get more aggressive.

Kinda awkward with the painful ones at first. He thinks you probably just want to get through it and move on because pain isn't something normally expressed for him so he kinda just subtly goes easy on you without really drawing attention to it. If you express it more openly and/or he gets more comfortable he will try to help you out. He understands having aches and pains from things you can't really help (like wounds and scars) so he'll try to apply what he knows and what you tell him helps.

Grim

A little impatient but tries his best to be polite. He understand its not your fault, and he doesnt blame you for any irritation he has, he just gets antsy when things arent efficient. (Hes working on it.) At least he doesnt rush you or anything... yay?

Other than that he has a "i don't care" attitude about it. Yes yes, its a part of you, so what? He doesn't mean anything by it, he just doesn't see it as something worth acknowledging, really. It's like noticing someone has curly hair. Its there, it might be something worth noting at first, but then you just forget about it until its relevant.

Doesnt care if something is funnily timed either. You can have fun with it but he isnt bothered. But if you have a response to something he says, tic or otherwise, he instinctively takes it as a genuine response lmao.

"HM, THESE NOODLES HAVE BETTER INGREDIENTS BUT THESE ONES HAVE THE PERFECT SHAPE FOR WHAT I WANT TO DO."

*tic: " mac n cheese"

"NO, MACARONI NOODLES WOULD NOT SUFFICE."

Like he doesn't process it entirely that its a tic and kinda just responds seriously. Its kinda funny tbh. You'll probably end up giving up on explaining its a tic anyways if you try so itd be easier to go along with it. (He argues that it is rude not to respond and he is taking his manners seriously now that he is out the underground.)

Will rock someones shit for being disrespectful and antagonizing you. Like maybe not physically but he will verbally rip someone to shreds. Like its pathetic to antagonize someone for something so basic for no reason. Is this person serious? Being rude over something so minor. No, its not funny. What is funny is how this person thinks they can just start shit and be a nuisance with no consequences. People like them would've gotten their teeth knocked in for behaving that way. People at least knew not to be assholes for no reason. (They had a system of 'i leave you alone you leave me alone' unless someone was after something like power or money or whatever. You always had a reason to do violent things. It was normalized, but it wasn't barbaric. )

[jennilah]

I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.

I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.

I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes

omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao

actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)

ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.

There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".

so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.

yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:

-Durarara!! -Deus Ex -Supernatural -Godzilla -Detroit: Become Human -There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI -And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here) -Halloween & Friday the 13th -and now, Saw

I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.

my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.

sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)

which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.

and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)

this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck

(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)

and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway

anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!

tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰

[denzartriste]

Hi denz do you have any set designs for any of the other characters in you pirate AU? (I Might need ideas for art mayhaps :D) like you can choose any character or characters you want

I also just liked seeing your thoughts about technos design bc it made more sense to me when then reading the newest chapter

Hi Ýr! I actually do, and also've drawn up some designs (Ranboo especially, since i needed a visual refrence for their entire. Situation.) The top two drawings are a bit older since i did them a while ago, but i still think its accurate?

The bottom one was the first of the new drawings i did, and i think its a bit obvious but that's fine. Gonna just point things out because i think that's the best way to explain :D Also trying not to delve too too much into spoilers but it will be tricky.

The before thing is referencing mainly when Ranboo met Tommy and Tubbo, it's after the boat crashing. Shaded parts are white, because ranboo scars white, and the mouth scars are placed where the jaw connects to the rest of the head. He also has ones on their tear ducks, thats what the scar lines near the eyes are. The top before drawing (the side profile one) has ranboo's braid still in, but thats technicly wrong because while Ranboo had their braid in when they met Tommy and Tubbo, they never tied it again. No reason to that, Ranboo just didnt feel a need to do it.

Their braid is tied on the right

The now drawings include the bandage, cause Ranboo doesnt really want to show his scars (bandage is tricky to do himself, but he can do it and usually does. There is a Reason in chapter 2 Ranboo asks tommy specificly to help him re-bandage his face.)

Last thing about them cause i know this is getting rambly (fully aware no one minds, but also i am trying to be clear and FAILING) : Ranboo has pointed ears. This is not a normal thing. Techno doesnt mention it because he choses not to notice it, but it felt impoprtant to mention since im talking about Ranboo's design.

Little baby tommy zoom in (i doodled it so small lmao sorry bout the pixels)

I just felt like drawing him very little and young. The scar is face paint wow i wonder if its familiar i wonder if thats like, a hint to something who knowsssss :) (Also it might just be mud actually, not face paint. He put mud right next to his eye and he thought it looked SO cool)

Also, pigtails. That was important. He has pigtails. In my heart it matters, fem tommy for the win he deserves to have longer hair

ALSO. The full body is inacurate, but it would be spoilers to do an accurate kid tommy so i sadly can't. When it's revealed i will as a little sorry (and also cause i REALLY wanna draw it but shhh thats not important) (it might also be related to why Ranboo asked Tommy to help him with his bandages. But i refuse to give away more than that)

Last but not least, Tubbo!!!!

He is NOT bald i just didnt want to draw more, so i took an screeshot of and older drawing of his scar because i think that's important. His eye droops and his face is a bit messed up, he also can't hear out of his left ear (obviously) but his other ear isnt that good at hearing either. Tubbo's been around cannons since he was too little to understand that, hey, maybe covering your ears will be helpful in the long run. But he was little and no one ever told him. He figured it out now, but his reflex is more of 'tense and stay very still' instead of 'cover your ears and duck'

He also tends to wear heavy outfits. Like, a big jacket and big boots and just clothes that are so puffy that they give him a round silhouette if that makes sense

[kaleidoscopic-quiddity]

'todoroki doesnt even want to be a hero, thats just something endeavor forced him into/pushed onto him'

did??? we all??? watch??? the same show????

todoroki openly antagonises Endeavor, to his face, numerous times 

even as a literal toddler he would stand up to endeavor, yelling at him to not hurt rei, and after rei pours the hot water on his face, todoroki told endeavor ‘it’s your fault she hurt me’ 

he slaps his hand away after the provisional licence remedial training, and in the endeavor agency arc he tells him to ‘stop acting like my dad in front of my friends’ 

just in general his manner of speaking to Endeavor is very disrespectful and outwardly aggressive in japanese

basically, hes not afraid of pissng off his dad, at all, even in public

so if todoroki truly didnt want to be a hero, what gives you the impression that he wouldnt just straight up refuse to go to UA, or at least do everything within his power to fail his classes/get expelled??

the whole point of his fight with midoriya at the sports festival is todoroki accepting himself and that his power is his own, not endeavor's, and that its okay for him to become a hero using it

literally what does todoroki say after midoriya yells 'its your power isnt it?!' at him? in that moment where himself admits that he forgot all about endeavor and wasnt thinking about him at all??? he says 'I want to be a hero too'

look i get why this take is popular, lots of people can relate to todoroki in that they have shitty/abusive parents who forced them into a career path or life style they dont wanna do

and so obviously they project those feelings of discontent and resentment back onto todoroki

but in the literal canonical text of bnha, his character aspires to be a great hero just like midoriya and bakugou

if heroics truly was 100% something that endeavor just forced onto him, why did todoroki go to help midoriya and iida in hosu? why did he follow midoriya and bakugou at jaku? why did, along with kirishima, he approach yaoyorozu to get a nomu tracker off of her after bakugou was kidnapped and say that he was going to make a rescue attempt whether or not midoriya or anyone else joined him? why did he run in to try to save all might from the nomu at USJ?

like???? i dont have anything against people having differing interepretations of a character or headcanons from me, ofc different ppl will read the same thing differently

but this is a take that is just so extremely the opposite of todoroki's canonical characterisation it baffles me that its so common??

did we all miss the part where he was deeply frustrated with himself for failing he provisional liscence exam? or where he decided that he needed to be the one to stop dabi?? the fact that he carries first aid supplies in his hero costume so he can better help people?? or how he suggested a concert for the school festival because he thought itd be a good idea to do something 'fun' and 'stress relieving' for the other students at UA???

idk, ofc at the end of the day ppl can headcanon what they like and everyones interpretations are valid and none of this actually causes any harm to anybody etcetera etcetera, art is subjective and all that

(like this is benign fandom bullshit for a mediorce shounen battle series, im self aware that none of this actually matters)

but idk im just still confused as to how ppl seem to miss the point so fuckin badly with todoroki's character