#im always so unfair to him
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When its dark
Who asked some cutie Moonsie?
It was supposed to be a quick monochromatic drawing with a simple colored background.. Got carried away and fully rendered it.
For once I worked a bit more on the background, even if its not that good. I tried.
#my art#drawing#fanart#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf security breach#moondrop#dca fandom#i love him#im always so unfair to him#since my favorite is Sun#i need to fix that
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cora and law sketches
#donquixote rosinante#trafalgar law#my art#described in alt text#ive been meaning to draw law smiling for a while. he's kind of always frowning and i want to change that. also wanted to draw cora cause i#never do!! i want to draw yamato too!! so many characters i love but never draw!!#im mad especially about cora cause im insane about both donquixote bros but only draw mingo which is so unfair because im not#normal about cora either. i love doomed siblings!! when i first watched that flashback i thought cora and mingo were twins. i couldnt stop#thinking of the similarities between them and vash and knives when i read trigun! i also love when ppl draw cora covered in scars.#truly bringing out the vash in him. i also love transfem cora hc and ive been meaning to draw her in cute outfits
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i also find ink sans perception of others sooo interesting. cause I don't see it as like evil or anything. he views others in a very similar way we creators do. Its not like impassionate or uncaring. He gets giddy and excited like we do. I think an "au fangirl" is the best way to describe it. (i swore comyet described him as that once but I can't remember). hes like... a interdimensional cheerleader.
He just connects with others like you would your favorite character. Sure, you like them, maybe you like them alot! but you probably don't see them as like...as human as you right? I don't think he gets enjoyment or likes their suffering. But them their suffering is the equivalent of what we see on tv show. So yeah he probably will care more for the fact that he literally ceases to have a personality without them. he doesn't like... care about them on the deep level or sees them as human (or skeletons? in this case).
I mean, why would he it view if differently? if you knew there's hundreds of versions of pretty much the same guy existed, would you? If you knew they were just a bunch of code, would you? That's not evil, its understandable im my opinion. How are you supposed to connect with others when you literally have always been an outcode? He's about as evil as we are, in that regard.
this is not to say other sanes perspectives are bad, just ink's is just as understandable as others? understandable doesn't mean good, im just saying it's a reasonable thought process given his life experiences.
honestly this yappage is sorta for me to understand his character as well. they say write what you know right?
#this may be something thats been talked about before#idk#toffeesbabbles#and im not saying it's evil what we do either#but no actually just saying our perspectives are similar#so i think its unfair to call him evil#ig#🤷#its also like...super late#so my brain is mush low-key#hopefully this makes sense#this was meant to only be a paragraph#but i couldn't help myself#also i always have to edit out the “i thinks”#eugh#ink sans
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woof
#twisted wonderland#twst#ortho shroud#drawings#doodles#took a (probundeservedunwarranted) break to doodle something really fast n since cerberus ortho was always just gonna be a doodle i did him#god his cards are so fucking pretty n so good wat the fuck man so unfair#first his fairy gala now cerberus n just the light n dark contrast duo im just hhHHHHFNFGNG#going so feral over his cerberus card goDDDDDD yANA SENSEI WHYYYYYYYY#ALSO hoping ortho comes home with this tribute pls i want your card but i also have to save for the def jade ssr forever looming over me#pls dont make me hit pity pls leave me with something im already like almost halfway in pulls sobs#on an unrelated note *how do you even ortho omg jksfk shroud artists are insane teach me your ways sdhfksd*
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hey so do you think wtv keiko had to deal with growing up with yusuke could be considered a type of parentification
#god chapters where barely anything happens except a character's realization about things can be hard ...#im writing another keiko pov chapter and it's hard because well!!#keiko was never really a main focus in the series and as time goes on she gets even less of a focus so i have to fill in these spots#in her personality and views that aren't really explored. im taking a lot of liberties lets say#and idek if it's gonna read as in character cos of that#anyway im tryna say that like. pre series keiko was basically this presence in yusuke's life and he saw her as a pain but he cared#she was there to scold him and cajole him into going to his classes and she was his only friend#now we know atsuko was negligent and idk how involved the yukimuras were in his life but i feel like keiko#whether directly or indirectly was given this duty like you have to keep him outta trouble#you're smart you're mature he needs someone like you. this responsibility just kind of put on her before she can understand the weight of i#and she can't really comprehend that weight until it's abruptly taken from her. yusuke dies and there's no one to shepherd#i feel like keiko should get to be mad about this. this realization of the nature of their dynamic. keiko planning things around yusuke#who's never done that in his life. not because he's purposely being thoughtless but bc he was never the one to have to plan#to think about what their future looks like. he just kinda drifted along and keiko tried to do damage control. it wasn't fair#yusuke is keeping secrets from her she is scared of high school and that he'll die again without her knowing why and it's unfair#so she should get to be mad also because girls getting to be mad is one of my favorite things 👍🏼#the realization that yusuke won't be lost without her so she shouldn't hinge her life on the expectation that he will be#she worries about yusuke a lot i think. especially after he comes back from the dead. and i think kuwa's presence would help ease that#dread in her heart. it doesn't have to be just me. there's someone who can be there with him always and it doesn't have to be me#the guilty relief of not having to be the sacrifice. but kuwa doesn't mind so maybe it's okay this way#idk just rambles about my fic while i puzzle out how to word it#character analysis#yukimura keiko#yu yu hakusho
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Thinking about riikiis whole outlook on life and goddddddd . God.dd god. Do you get it . Do you understand
#talk#riikii taavii#I think hes simple almost to a deceptive degree that it immediately puts people off. Certain people anyway#Hes so honest and stubborn about it. Everything. He almost never lies. Ever#“Life is unfair because people suck but you have to make it worth living regardless” is such. Its childish even. To an extent#To say that the world should be a certain way and that everything can be fine for everyone but its not fine because of the people in it#He doesn't say cruel. He says unfair. Life was unfair to him and he was always an outcast who seemingly had no place in it but he knows.#He knows its all bullshit. He “deserves” to live because he is alive. If he wasnt meant to be alive then he wouldn't be alive.#He is alive in spite of everyone that wants him dead. He is alive almost because of spite. Because he is PROOF.#HE IS PROOF THAT EVERYONES A LIAR AND THAT THEYRE ALL WRONG AND THAT THEY CAN ALL EAT SHIT#do you get ittttt DO YOU GET WHAT IM DAIYNGNG
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Spiralling AGAIN would you believe it
#txt#trying to figure it out#i tried to be there for jim and listen to him and be a good partner#but he barely opened up#i didnt know he wanted to leave me#he chose to open up when i was mad#so i didnt respond#so that i didnt yell#not that that is his fault#i should have done better#but i couldny#in that house#i was so overstimulated all the fucking tome#time#like always#and i didnt even realise it#until he kicked me put#out*#and now im just guilty over everything.#why wasnt i better#why cpuldnt i be better#its not fair that he didnt tell me#3 months and you really couldnt tell me what was on your mind#thats unfair man#i was trying so hard to be better#to do better#giving him space is almost impossible#hes my best friend and my soul mate#i dont want to talk to anyone else tbh#so being ignored is like a knife to my chest and idk what to do about it and this is my last tag i can put it and i just dont even know
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yk what it was never that serious oh my god
#im good i think !!! my mood swings are !!! all over the place but actually yk everything pasess and time passes and hurt passes and there's#so so much more than this there's more than all of this and it was good before it will be good life doesn't just stop its fucking shit and#hell rn and it sucks that things could've been better and it sucks how unfair this all is but actually#crying over someone who wasnt talking to me for months is not actually that worth and god i am genuinely terrified that ill never love agai#and i really think i won't i think he was my person but tbh that was fucked like that was actually fucked up a lot of that was just hurting#and ik we both hurt each other a lot and ill never blame him and it will SUCK to see him again next year but ill be okay and everything e#will be okay i just need to meet and go out with more ppl and rmmbr that theres more to life than this shitty house and my shitty parents#and ill always love him and i cried over him so so much already but it is true that we had to have started moving on from it all at some#point i just truly believed wed like weather this together and im so disappointed at being left alone like this and i did rlly wish hed#stay but yk it can only really get better from here and whatever i loved him so so much but it's okay itll be okay#i need to live long enough to move out get a haircut a banging sexy ass bass and a cat so yk cant go anywhere until that happens
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does anyone out here have a dad that isnt an asshole all the fucking time. like is it even possible.
#thinks we're ungrateful and incapable and lazy for lemme check. being disabled#and then when we rightfully call him out on his dick behavior he gets mad and slams things and mutters under his breath#and is like 'oh great so its MY FAULT'#and tries to push the narrative that now we've upset him and he's gonna feel like dogshit for the next two hours like.#congrats. that's how we live our whole fucking lives because of you. im always thinking about what he's gonna get pissed off at next#and how im not enough for him and how he's gonna be mad i couldnt do something#when he says shit like 'we need to teach them to sponge-wash the dishes'#like we're morons. like we dont know#we tried to LOAD the dishwasher and got so nauseous and yucked out we had to switch off every couple items#and both heaved over the trashcan#you think im not doing it specifically to make you upset? you think I CAN and im just choosing not to?#god he makes me so mad. and sad. and full of grief.#and worried for my sister#because she's bipolar and his provocation has a very real not unlikely chance at making her suicidal#it's such a mess#and its unfair for her and its unfair for me
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Saw your tag saying FSM haters come fight you. Here I am! Frankly I'm not so much of a hater as I am just of the opinion "wow this guy sure Started All This Shit" but I'm absolutely willing to hear your view of the matter if you're willing to share! Love some Friendly Fandom Discourse (it's healthy tbh) come at me bro 👊 👊 👊
HI LOL.... my personal opinion is that the FSM gets a lot of hate for similar reasons to wu (which i also think are unjustified but that's a different post). like you said he gets a lot of the blame put on him for starting everything that's to come in the show, but i don't really feel like he intended to do any harm.
the FSM was born into a war. when he was still a very young child, he was forced to choose one side of himself, of his family, and destroy the other. and so he ran away. but this world he runs to is chaotic and dangerous. and so again, he is forced to fight for the right to live in peace along with the inhabitants of this world.
but even in this new world, he wasn't safe: the oni followed him, determined to bring him back to fight for them. and after them, the overlord. his whole life, especially when he was younger, he had been fighting, or running from forces that aimed to destroy him.
i believe the FSM was incredibly paranoid throughout his life, worrying that at any moment everything would be ripped away from him. this can be seen in how secretive he was, how much of his history is hidden away. the mech used to win the war against the overlord was sealed away where it could never be found. he granted elemental powers to select people to help keep him safe. even in his death, he hid away, in a place that even wu could not find.
this paranoia carries on through his sons. he taught them both to fight, to protect themselves, when they were also very young. one of the earliest moments we see of them is them fighting with swords! and though he loves them, they are not immune to his secrecy, or his fears. when they steal the scrolls and enter the serpentine territory, he never fully trusts them again. when garmadon gets bitten and starts to turn to evil, he's desperate to cure him. and i don't fully believe that the FSM intended to make garmadon feel broken or "wrong"... just that his fear has so consumed him at this point that he can't see the damage he's doing to his children.
it's also worth noting that despite garmadon's corruption, the FSM never truly hated him. he was left to protect the golden weapons alongside wu, he recieved the same protective enchanted gi, and was left the same clues to find him after his death. it's just that garmadon was unable to see this through the corruption (which is another post).
perhaps all he did was to protect his sons. that seems to be how wu sees it, at least. because wu repeats this same behaviour with the ninja, even if unintentionally. he brings these kids into a war because that happened to him, and his father before him. maybe he doesn't even realise it's wrong. he hides things from them not only because because he's ashamed of his past (again, another post lol), but because his father always hid things from him. it protects wu, but it also protects the ninja.
i don't believe the FSM was a flawless person. hes one of many grey characters in ninjago, and to boil down everything he did to "good" or "bad" is a disservice. maybe you see him as someone who only ever ran from problems instead of truly solving them, maybe you see him as a cruel and neglectful father. and maybe those are both true. but he's also someone who always tried to fight for peace, for himself and everyone in ninjago, and someone who truly loved his sons, despite the damage he did to them both.
so that's who i think the FSM was. an immortal, all powerful godlike being, yes, but also a scared child who just wanted to live peacefully, and would do anything to prevent another war. and maybe he is, in some way, indirectly responsible for every bad thing in the show, but i think this is more of an after-effect of the countless wars and conflict. he did the best he could, and considering all he went through, i think he did alright.
#also like. he died thousands of years ago so the fact that its only recently things have been kicking off is quite impressive LOL#ninjago#the first spinjitzu master#fsm ninjago#SORRY THIS IS SO LONG.... hopefully it makes sense i rlly didnt wanna spend ages on this but theres soooo much to say#its hard not diving into hc territory too LOL....#like always my thoughts on ninjago are complex and weave into each other... so its hard to make them coherent but hopefully it comes across#i have two other big essay posts im working on rn so yeah i didnt wanna spend.. AGES on it haha#if u disagree or r confused come argue w me pleasee i love sharing opinions abt this shit. its so fun. jsut dont be rude thats all i ask :]#asks#also i didnt know where to put this but worth noting: wu and garm entering the serpentine territory risked starting Another war.#so him being mad is fairlyyyy reasonable i think. even if he was extreme abt it#smth else i didnt know where to put: the theory that the overlord is the manifestation of fsms oni side/inner conflict over his identity#issue upon issues....#anyway. i think its a little unfair that ppl always talk abt how awful it is that the ninja had to fight so young and stuff#when the exact same things happened to wu garm and fsm
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YOUR PREV POST IS SOOO REAL DUDE. Mine scolding daigo was the hottest thing ever bro and daigo himself saying other than kashiwagi mine is the only guy who has the balls to scold him like that.. giggling and kicking my feet in the airrrrrr
no thats what im saying like im going to throw up and cry and i will simply need thirty minutes alone its so good whenever i thinka bout it ..........
#snap chats#SECOND ANON YOURE SO REAL LIKE I LOVE KIRYU BUT SOMETIMES HE NEEDS TO GET KICKED IN THE PANTS#ALLEGEDLY.#balancing being a kiryu and daigo fan is so real ...... i love daigo and kiryu was mad unfair to him#but i also love kiryu because he's so messy but also means well but intention is lost on actiona nd ouuugughh......#mine's frustration is so relatable too like seeing- even just a friend Period- stress themselves out like that#and you just wanna grab them by the shoulders and shake them and be like MOTHERFUCKER !!!!!!!!!!!! lovingly.#like UGH its so good ... its also an aspect of mine i love so much#like yes he wants bonds and relationships but that doesnt make him a doormat or a yesman yk what i mean#like he'll agree with daigo and follow daigo on things but he won't always agree if he thinks he has a better idea#whether that idea Is actually better is not relevant the point is i love how he can disagree with daigo but still adore him#and vice versa in that daigo can take that criticism and not take it so personally and values it#hmm... i love mine and daigo i think ....... together and as individuals.... they just ... //mashes dolls together//#they go together so well .... complete each other even ... im sorry im being menty
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Time for me to be completely changed as a person! *just watched falsettos*
#the klock keeps ticking#oh dude we’re so back oh its so back#how am i supposed to live my life after this how am i supposed to go on#its funny cuz ive seen this damn show actually a thousand times i know it forward and backwards#and i dont really cry ever in general and ive become so familiar with falsettos that i dont cry anymore#but it still has the ability to destroy some deep part of me every single time in a new way#I will stay firm in my belief that its the greatest piece of media ever made#if i ever get to see falsettos on broadway (pipe dream ik) like#thatd be it for me man like how the hell are you supposed to leave and drive home after that akdnsk#i cant remember the last time i watched either i think it mightve been like. when i first moved into my old apartment 😳#and ive gone through quite a bit of shit since then and im smarter. i think#so yeah it hit me very hard this time i always stick to something different#im very much wrecked about this fucking family lets just say that#lets just say ‘shes cooked for some 200 guests i know we’re not that many actually we’re 7’#really hit different this time KID DO YOU KNOW HOW PROUD I AM#DONT KNOW WHY BUT HE LOOKS LIKE MARVIN#so so good so lovingly written and performed so real and beautiful and tragic FUCKKKK#yeah basically prepare for me to write like 50 essays for a few days about all the characters every song every lyric every sound yeah#falsettos is probably deadass the reason im like this it shaped me so much#just like. the ending of tragedy that was so unexpected and unfair#and it looks at the fucking homophobic shits who preached all about this being just desserts for the perverted behavior#and it says ‘this man could’ve kept that unhappy heterosexual life and avoided all of this but he chose the one that killed him because#it made him feel like himself it made him happy despite how brief it was and hed choose this route in every universe’#just a piece of art that is so true to queerness i dont think anything else has instilled a sense of pride in me like falsettos has#the tight knit family marvin tries so hard to keep together is falling apart worse and worse with each attempt#but once marvin is happy and loves himself and is loved by others the family ends up growing and sticking together naturally#aaughhh yeah ahahaha yeah man everyone please love your friends so genuinely love yourself and keep going 🥰
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#there’s a content creator that passed aways a few years ago#and he was very loved and still is#and im seeing people say stuff like ‘i started watching just recently but it’s so fun to watch him’#and 🤧#its sweet? and theres ppl that are fans saying the same thing#about still consuming content. about his humor still holding up#and im thinking about liam:( i guess i want to also get to a point where its fondly looking back at memories#not feeling overly sad:(#though its a bit different#especially bc of how sudden it all was#so so so sudden and unfair#why did this happen:(#i love seeing pictures of happy memories of him#but the most recent pics make me sad:(#i dont know what im saying#i miss him i miss him#i feel for his family so much#worst pain possible#i hope they can be together and support each other#this will hurt a lifetime but we will remember him always too#our darling#:(#day of the death is just hitting me more
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me rn
#slept for almost 2 hrs straight in school n still eepy#not even bubble tea made me more awake#just finished another rin fic to cope i might be going crazy A little#hhhhh nothing is gg right w my life lowkey#results so bad my teacher checked in w me and encouraged me#so unfair…. i worked so hard to receive tbe bare minimum but i guess thats just me.#always so medicore… never good at anything… hhhhh lowkey feel like giving up#wbats the plint… back to my hopeless era again but at least ill be here i guess#rlly i need a rin in my life to get me going again i wld tewrite all my essays consult n evegyhing for him#rin pls be real soon.#gonna do smth impulsive mahbes who knows#hhhh zzzzzzzz dreading everything just wanna cry n yhrow a hissy fit abt everything but j cant ever do that#never having any personal time … ill always be surrounded… wanna be alone but im too afraid of that too…#Anywahs back to rinmaxxing!#probably resting this weekend n posting again next week … :p
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SOOOOOO hard to go through everyday life trying to ignore the never-ending feeling that im just irreparably fucked up and therefore should just give up on everything
#this aint exactly s******* but it aint exactly not s******* either#anyways it gets even harder when i have to live under the same roof as my brother who is so much better than me in every single conceivable#and imaginable way possible like#and i knowwww a LOT of it comes down to us having relatively similar yet wildly different lives despite being 1.5y apart and having the sam#family our entire lives like he has gone through NOTHING and i mean not a single societal issue ive had to face and endure my entire life#he's a man im a woman. he's white im black. he's straight im gay. he's skinny ive always been 'overweight'. he's always been the good#christian kid ive always had issues w faith and religion. he's never been mentally ill i was clinically depressed for nearly 8yrs of my lif#we both lost the same parent and im the only one who got pathological grief and a personality disorder out of it. he's had a great job for#the last 7yrs that now pays him 20k+ every month ive only had 3 odd jobs my entire life and 2 of those my MOTHER had to give me so i would#have SOMETHING and ive never made over 1.6k monthly n my last job was minimum wage only#he's had like 4 relationships and is nearly engaged im so traumatized + emotionally unavailable ive only ever been on 1 date my entire life#he has a good relationship w every family member we have i have Issues w like half the family. he's always been an active member of our#church i can barely listen to like 4 traditional hymns before i start losing my mind and spiraling. i think the only two ways we're pretty#much equal like socially is that we're both able bodied cis and christians but still the cis and christian thing is debatable for previousl#stated reasons so like. do yall see how much better he is doing than me in every little last area in life and how he's always gotten the#long straw when it comes to Not having to deal w certain obstacles in life. n i know its like yea idk what it actually is like to be him an#he could not be doing all that well first of all shut up. second of all if it was 1 or 2 things i'd get it but it's literally EVERYTHING#and i know bc of said things n our v different lives it's unfair to me to compare the two of us but then it begs the question: WHY#WHY did i have to go through these things. WHY do i have to deal w this. WHY did i get the short straw literally every goddamn time#WHY did i have to get THIS life like WHYYYYY why ME GOD. why have I had to put up w all this bullshit for 24 fucking years!!!!!!!!! im TIRE#and this is not me hating or resenting him i know it's not his fault and he is so good to me#but still. why was i left with these things? to live like this?#so yes i guess i do envy him a little bit. who wouldn't#mari.txt#personal#tw negative#dl#btw i do NOT mean some identities are better than others. i mean he is better and is doing better than me in life partially bc he's never#had to deal w certain social issues and obstacles that come w oppressed identities.
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god i hate working a two person job being someone who doesn't miss or forget a thing with my coworker who idgafing through her life bc the way it hurts my pride when i have to also bear the burden of her not doing the job properly
#and my head of department just texted me likee well please be more careful next time (both of us)#and theres no way to just straight up tell him that i am always careful and i was not even there when that happened#well i still said that as carefully worded as possible bc theres no way im taking the blame for being careless#but i just hate it so much bc i always make sure everything is going properly i feel like im this girl's second team lead for fucks sake#i had a day off yesterday and just clocked in today and immediately have to listen how we didn't see important tasks#well there is no we actually i am fighting for my life#tbh this is such a minor unfairness but it still makes me feel million years worth of rage#and the situation at my mom's work is way more unfair to her genuinely i can't imagine how she is able to push through it#it's unrelated but it just crossed my mind. actually even with my shit coworker i am at least treated fairly in the eyes of my team lead#00
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