#im afraid to!
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
--
no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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This is exactly how I picture them after colin and pen married 😂
#polin#bridgerton#nicola coughlan#luke newton#bridgerton s3#bridgerton season 3#last hours before the best bridgerton season how we all doing ?#Im afraid I cant sleep because of the excitement guys
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the one where cheerilee knows
#trans big mac real#cheerilee said the line#that's probably applejack's old copy#theyre transhet and transbian best friends and you cant tell me otherwise im afraid#does miss cheerilee is lebsnian? (no)#irrelevant but i hc cheerilee as transfemme aroace heteroplatonic FIGHT ME#leslie feinberg mentioned!!!#this was meant to be much lower quality but I accidentally got invested#comic#art#artists on tumblr#my art#fanart#mlp fim#my little pony#big mac#big macintosh#apple bloom#cheerilee#miss cheerilee#mlp art#mlp g4#mlp#transgender#queer art#queer artist#queer artwork#leslie feinberg#stone butch blues#short comic
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INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE S2E07 "I Could Not Prevent It"
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#claudia#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#gifs#my gifs#my first iwtv gif.. im afraid i wont be able to stop now
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My favorite moment so far AHUWHAHA
#tgcf#heaven official's blessing#hualian#RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY WIFE (MUQING)???????#theres no other way to transfer spiritual power im afraid 😫😫😫😫#tian guan ci fu#hua cheng#xie lian#pei ming IT SHOULD BE ME HAVING FIRST ROW SEATS TO THIS KISS
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Hand me my shovel, I'm going in.
close up!!! :D
😂😂😂😂
#the magnus archives#tma#jonathan sims#tma fanart#be not afraid#the archivist#the archist#stament#hand me my shovel im going in#will wood!!!!#yes!!!
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#going completely crazy at this point#when they kiss im afraid its over for me#also#this.. might be the best thing i've drawn in a while#so hope y'all like it as much as i do!#agathario#agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#agatha x rio#agathario fanart#lesbian art#evgarart#Spotify
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I am loudly pushing the batdad agenda i am loudly pushing the— DPxDC Prompt
“Woah. You look like shit."
Granted, that’s probably not the first thing Danny should be saying to the guy that just bit the curb, but in his defense; he’s not running on 100% right now either.
The man -- tall, towering, and broader than Danny is tall -- whips around on his heel, black frayed cape flaring out impressively. Danny would've whistled in appreciation, but he takes the time instead to wipe the back of his hand across his mouth, smearing the blood running from his nose across his cheek.
"Sorry." He blinks widely, not even flinching as the man with the horns zeroes in on him. "That was rude of me. I have a really bad brain-to-mouth filter; Sam says its what always gets me into trouble."
And she's not wrong either, per say. His smart mouth is what landed him in this situation -- with blood blossom extract running through his veins and cannibalizing the ectoplasm in his bloodstream. Thanks Vlad.
The man grunts at him; a short, curt "hm" that shouldn't make Danny smile, but he does because he's somewhat delirious and probably concussed. The man keeps some kind of distance, sinking towards the shadows of Gotham's alleyway like he dares to melt right into it.
If it's supposed to scare Danny, it doesn't work. Danny's never been afraid of the dark; he's always been able to hide himself in it. He blinks slowly at the mass of shadows.
"You look hurt." The shadows says, blurring together around the edges. Danny squints, and licks his lips to get the blood dripping down his chin off. Ugh, he hates the taste of blood.
"I am." He says, "My godfather poisoned me. M'dying." The agony of the blood blossom eating him from the inside out looped back around to numbing a while ago, so all he feels is half-awake and dazed.
"Hey," Danny stumbles forward towards the man, a bloodied hand reaching out to him. "You-- you're a hero, right? You're not attacking me; which is more than I can say for most costumed people I've met." Maybe it's a poor bar to judge someone at, but he's already established that Danny's not in his right mind.
The man makes no change in expression, but Danny realizes blearily that it's hard to tell with the shadows on his face. He stays still long enough for Danny to latch onto the cape -- stretchy, but almost soft under his fingers.
He looks up blearily into the whites of the man's eyes. "Can you help me? I don't-- I don't wanna die." Again. He doesn't wanna die again. He blinks slow and lizard-like. "I mean- I'll probably get to see mom and dad again, but I told them I'd at least try and make it to adulthood."
There's a clatter down the street, and Danny's ghost sense chills up his spine and leaves a bitter, ashy taste in his mouth. He immediately knows who it belongs to even before the deceptively gentle; "Daniel?" echoes down the way.
"Daniel? Quit your games, badger, Gotham is dangerous for children."
Danny's mouth pulls back, and blood spills against his tongue. "Please." He rasps, and grabs onto the shadow's cape with both hands. "Please. He's going to kill me. Please--"
"Daniel? Is that you?"
His lips part, dragging in air to plead with the darkness again. He doesn't need to, the whites of his eyes narrow, and the cape whirls around him before Danny can blink. Soon swaddled in shadows, the Night lifts him up, and steals him away.
#I AM LOUDLY PUSHING THE BATDAD AGENDA#anyways— add ons are encouraged i wanna talk more dpxdc with folks i just cant find any aus i really like enough to engage with#which is nobody's fault and its why im making my own content in order to reach more people#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#dpdc#dc x dp#dpxdc prompts#i took a ‘which batfam member are you (except its personal)’ quiz a few days ago#and got bruce wayne. and then was promptly read to filth why im most like him and it rudely but accurately explained why im the most like#him. it also consequently explained to me why i like him so much. whenever i see him in his kindest form i see a mirror looking back#anyways lots of ‘danny rejecting bruce as a parent’ aus. may i present: bruce and danny finding family in each other aus. batdad aus pls.#dpxdc prompt#dcxdp#this prompt can take place at any point of Batkid accumulation but personally i was imagining this as before Bruce has any of his kids yet#eldest brother danny supremacy and also just that one on one bonding#danny being someone who was never afraid of the dark as a kid and even less so as he got older. taking solace in it as a ghost because you#cant hide in the dark when you glow. his enemies can't jump out at him. but he can jump out at them. how can he be afraid of the dark when#the dark is where the stars like to live? there's a comfort in the shadows. there might be something hiding in it. but he's hiding in it to#blood blossoms eat ghosts headcanon#wasn't sure where i was gonna go with this at the beginning and then i caught steam.#batman casually kidnaps an orphan upon kid's request. also the kid was Actively Dying Of Poison. What was he gonna do?? NOT help him?#mister 'keeps candy in his utility belt specifically for scared children'??? no way.
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a guide on how to befriend ur local wanderer
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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dr watson in his 60s, tanned by the sussex sun, returns to his old service on the outbreak of WW1
this outfit is not historically accurate at all, but i really wanted to draw how i imagined watson in the gorgeous WW1 era h/w fic The Presbury Letters
+ bonus homecoming to angry bee husband
#are you guys proud of me it's my first h/w kiss <3#holmes/watson#acd holmes#acd johnlock#sherlock holmes#john watson#minh art#the file name for this is all quiet on the watson front#i made old man watson a little too sexy im afraid#like damn holmes. you let THAT go to war
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pocky day without a pocky game...
#orv#kim dokja#yoo joonghyuk#han sooyoung#joongdok#ever makes art#annual tradition of forgetting about pocky day until 11/10 and then posting stupid garbage: fulfilled#ill post nice orv art someday. until then im afraid its either bookmarks or drawings catered for me and my homegirl uriel
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I totally wasn’t rewatching PASWG while drawing these, no way. But this is what happens when you make me fanart. I GET YOU🫵
#liseysart#“why havent you drawn Nari in their style?” because im genuinely too afraid of fucking it up thats why😎👍#I will soon!... As soon as Im able yo get it to look right#illustration#cotl#cotl au#cotl lamb#cotl narilamb#cotl aym#cotl baal#Kitchen Sink Au#Convalescence AU
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#ldpdl the helen of troy of vampires#daniel molloy#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#danstat#lesdaniel#loustat#danlou#loudaniel#danloustat#i never learned their ship names beyond loustat and at this point im too afraid to ask#iwtv#interview with the vampire#c.txt#mine#dying to see these two on screen together theyre gonna have a bitch off
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There's hesitation in his eye for one moment. A passing thought of all times spent together you'll never remember.
#bg3#durgetash#enver gortash#gortash#dark urge#durge#baldur's gate 3#YALL IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM so totally normal#AND GET THAT GAUNTLET I AINT AFRAID OF YOU
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Trump survived. Here's what will happen.
Every media, news outlet will be showing this photo. Not of a convicted felon who was impeached, who summoned violent terrorists to the white house, who sexually assaulted many women, but of a survivor, a hero.
And Trump will win 2024. The Alt Right and his MAGA supporters will see this and be more motivated than ever to vote Trump. Centrists will see this and think "the left is so much more extreme than the right" and vote Trump. Fuck, even liberals, after seeing Bidens disastrous debate performance might vote trump. In their eyes, he's a survivor now, he's strong now, he's worthy now. If you don't believe me, wait and see the top comments of news articles, the Reddit posts, the twitter quote tweets.
It isn't if Trump wins, it's when Trump wins, Ukraine is Fucked. Palestine is extra Fucked. And of course, America is absolutely Fucked.
I don't like Biden, but Americans have to remember: you live in a two-party system.
It is Biden or Trump.
And I'd much much rather an old husk of a man that has done so much good for trans rights, social policies, and human rights in general, than Trump. Yes, Biden has sent aids to Israel. Do you think Trump won't do the same? Do you think Trump won't do worse?
"Vote for a third party, they're both awful" you might say. Come on, be realistic. This is about holding the line against fascism. It is going to be way WAY easier to change the system when you're up against milk toast Joe than an actual dictator. So,
For the love of god, vote Biden in Novermber.
#supernatural#donald trump#joe biden#2024 presidential election#us politics#destiel#im aware that posting on tumblr wont help much#but i felt like saying something. a stark warning perhaps#i get the celebrating and honestly i find it amusing too but this is such a critical moment to be serious and attentive#speak to your relatives if you can#or post this on other socials#you can even copy and paste this i dont care about credit#i just am very very afraid. trump winning is so much more than probable now
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