#ill probably make a post about it soon
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A collage I made for one of the characters from my newest story. His name is Kundel by the way hes an absolute manfail and a menace
#i promise promise promise ill post a test chapter soon#im just not sure yet where i want this project to go so im avoiding actually writing it but i have all of the art prepared#its going to be so fun though its so polish and yyy fantasy like and yeah just trust me#although thinking about characters is way easier than writing so i do it constantly#ill probably make more collages like this for other ocs too#i missed talking about my characters so ill do it in the tags#besides being an absolute boyfail kundel also owns an awfully old bmw car that he uses to drive his friends around#and literally EVERYONE complains about his driving#pirat drogowy behavior#besides that hes the brother of the main character from my last post about this project#her name is marysia#also his name translates to scrub. like the way you describe animals#or mutt#digital artist#oc#oc art#digital art
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i dont usually consider myself a cellbithead because if i compare the hours ive spent watching him to the hours ive spent watching mouse, tina, bagi, foolish, and roier, its nothing. but thats not because i dont spend a lot of time watching him. its because i spend an unreasonable amount of hours watching the others 😭i actually watch a lot of cellbit to be honest. his streams rule. i should post about him more
#So many mouse hours.#i just checked my watchtime earlier. dont worry about it#tina hours are also very high i think. but mouses streaming squedule makes it easy to get hundreds of hours and never realize#ill probably vodwatch cellbit meeting mouse again soon because it was really funny. and ill keep the chat closed because i love myself.#orrr ill vodwatch tchia. that game looked so cute when it came out i should watch him play it ..#AUGH so much to vodwatch i still need to catch up on my tina vods AUUUGHH#my posts#i just realized i probably have insane bagi hours because there was a period of time where i kept falling asleep to her streams
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I love seeing that we're all very insane about that marble heart lmao
#ive mainly talked about it amongst other things#but one day ill make a post dedicated to it alone talking about my interpretation of the different meanings it has#probably wont be soon cause i know it would take me a while to write
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i got SO inspired by this beautiful photo by Ron Frazier so i decided to paint it !! and then throw some guys on there cuz of course
u can look below the cut if you want to see the painting without the characters !!
MY PAINTING !! this was so fun fr i love painting light <3 might go ahead and post this separately but for now you must look at these ocs ok?
#💎#my art#my ocs#character art#digital painting#artists on tumblr#i actually emailed him to ask if he was cool with me posting this bc i obviously heavily referenced his work#and he said i was good to use the images however i liked! which is very cool and sweet. the original picture just stunned me#and it was soo so so fun to paint bc i love bright neon light contrasts like this#idk if the heights and proportions even make sense in the scene idk how big this kinda vending machine is irl#bc the actual ref pic was taken in japan#and i havent been there !#tbf alex the guy by the vending machine is like 6'4 so if hes too big . maybe i intended it. hmm???#i like trying to paint characters into scenes in my style cuz i dont do ut often.. fun challenge#one of my favorite bits was painting in the no smoking sign rifht next to my sketch of achin smoking . yessir#achin goodman#alex young#oh one last thing i did change the design and logo on the vending machine n addrd some little stickers to the electrical box !!#jsut for some visual interest <3 somee of the stickers actually come from another piece i did that ill probably post soon :)#i like making lil stickers.. theyre not really meant to Be anything#i did a lot of this while watching drawfee vods so when i look at parts of it theyre all i can think about haha#ok well i was editing my draft and ended up posting this on accident instead . at 4 am . so it stays LMAO#oops
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can someone remind me to write up my thoughts about gallagher and the enigmata later or at least compile them somewhere i want to share it but also my Goodness i am sleepy as heck today and i have work tonight 😔
#and its a saturday so its gonna be busy asldfjkasdlkah#im just. im so sleepy man#and i have to wake up early too for work tomorrow so i just. Im going to Die between today and tomorrow count on it#but at least on monday-wednesday ill make myself catch up on sleep#love the work but on the downside MY SLEEP.....#i forgot if i said it here. idk where i was posting bro#but the other day i 100% the theme park and am close to 100% dewlight pavilion so i'll be nearly caught up with all information#that + still need to read#but im also nearly caught up with all the reading in penacony too so thats super fun and exciting !!#but because of that i have thoughts askjdfalh#most of it is towards gallagher and the past of penacony and the watchmaker but. you know alskdjfalskjh#avil plays hsr#hsr 2.1 spoilers#just in case o7#i will say though#its wild i havent run into any information regarding the dreammaster at all really#the one who adopted sunday and robin#who is the dreammaster? why does the dreammaster and watchmaker have beef with each other? whats going on?#where did the shift come from between the watchmaker being the father of penacony to the family being in charge#since the family and the watchmaker are kinda against each other#(shakes the game) I WILL KNOW YOUR SECRETS SOON ENOUGH. AS SOON AS I AM MORE AWAKE ITS OVER FOR YOU.#i wish i had someone to ramble about ideas with and like bounce off of#WE CAN SOLVE THE MYSTERIES OF PENACONY! TOGETHER!#and then probably get our asses killed too by getting to close to the legacy 😔✌🏼 itd be the way of the truth
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Part Two (Stellaron Hunters)
Like the last one with the Astral Express, I am listing my opinions on aspects of the HSR designs, including things I kinda dislike or at least would change about certain playable designs in HSR to help myself with planning some of my own designs/redesigns for future art!
And I am so excited to get onto three of my favorite designs in this game!! The Stellaron Hunters are my babies and I originally was going to include them in the AE part 1 post, but sadly exceeded some kind of limit on the post while rambling about both of the groups designs, so they get their own post! And y'know what if that gives me more room to talk about them, I am not upset!
Ofc, Disclaimer: I am not a professional character designer, I'm not saying any of my ideas for them are objectively better or improvements even, nor am I bashing any of these designs. This is just my opinion and I like most if not all of the playable designs at the moment! I just have a few thoughts regarding them.
The List part 2:
Silver Wolf: I really like her design, I think honestly the Stellaron Hunters (at least for the trio, still forming my thoughts on Sam's) are easily some of the best designed characters in HSR so far. I do think out of those three designs though, Silver Wolf might be the weakest? Not that it's bad ofc, as I just said I think they're some of the best designs, but alongside Kafka and Blade, it feels like there's more that could be done with her design. They went ham on having so many like "Haha look she's a gamer!" details on her outfit that it ends up a bit eye rolling when you keep seeing all the details. The buttons hanging from her belt, the controller garter, the pattern on the fabric hanging from her hip for no reason, the power button logos on her her belt in multiple places and the strap that hold her knife, and that's not even all of them. It's just a bit much. Yes, she's a gamer, we get that. It doesn't need to be sprinkled throughout her design this much, at least not in this way. Because the way they did it, admittedly looks a bit gimmicky since it's only visual details rather than anything more is the best way I can describe it. I would maybe give her a few more items in place of all of these little things. Give her a visible earpiece, or some other kind of hands off communication device. Give her more devices if you're gonna have her adorned with all these straps, make them useful. Though I have two (maybe three?) other bigger ideas that could either work for changing her up physically, either separately or somehow together in a design. I'm stuck between the idea of giving her comfier clothes, both to reflect her more laid back personality and also to fit more so with what she does, or giving her more of a tech wear influence in her design, especially considering PunkLorde is meant to be a cyberpunk themed place. I feel like there's a better way to reflect that influence in her design. Also I dunno about you, but when I think cyberpunk I think of Neons a bit. I’m not saying turn her whole color palette that, but I think in a few of the patterns or in little details adding tiny touches of neon would look cool and help make her pop out a bit. (Sorry this ended up rambling, when I actually draw my thoughts for her, it will come through cleaner and clearer. Overall, I really like her design still even if there's a lot of details I would preferably change.)
Kafka: Kafka is one of my favorite designs, I adore her, I adore the spider, the web, and even the butterfly motifs present in her design. Her color scheme has a sense of allure to it if that makes sense, well balanced throughout her from head to toe. If I were to change something, it would be to make her design more show-y, a little more over the top. As it stands, Himeko has a more ostentatious design than her. Which feels off to me. "Oh but she's going on missions, taking people out, and collecting Stellarons. Her practical design makes sense." Very true, but also these missions aren't merely just missions. They are performances, displays of acting according to Elio's scripts in order to obtain the results he needs for the future. Kafka, of the rest of the Stellaron Hunters we've seen so far, seems to be the one that best fits into the role of Elio's dramatic villain/anti-hero. I mean just compare her presence in the Luofu quest to like Blade also in the Luofu quests, or Sam in the Penacony ones. There is a difference in dramatics and performance. She beckons the audience's (and law enforcement's) eyes towards her, as she strings them along with her schemes and plans. She is made to be the one in the lime light, delivering monologues and putting on the best show for everybody. When we look at the few missions of the Stellaron Hunters we’ve seen so far, Kafka does fit the bill as the star of his show, his leading actor in the role of the antagonist. As such, I think Kafka could benefit from making her outfit a bit more dramatic, leaning into the role she plays even further. Especially when thinking about how playing up that dramatized version of herself would work with the facade she's hinted at putting up. I do adore it the way it is, I just think more could be done with it. Lean a bit harder in, and by nature of making her more over the top, that could lead to the potential for a more interesting silhouette depending on how it's handled. Maybe even some more elements to influence like making it more over the top could be inspired from the Kafka Stigmata in HI3rd
Blade: I can’t lie to y’all. I think his design is close to perfection. I think it’s so well done (even though the silhouette could use some work? Depending?), it’s absolutely packed with symbolism. However, aside from just some silhouette adjustments, something I would change is the emphasis of how injured he is. The injuries he feels every single day of his life, that can’t heal because of Jingliu essentially overriding the default state his body is trying to restore. It’s a big thing in his lore, so much so that it’s been mentioned multiple times including in a main companion quest and literally up front show to us face to face. That cg of him with the sword in his chest feels like somebody stuck a sword in mine every time I see it, I swear. But design wise, I feel like this point about him and his history doesn’t shine through as well, and it feels like the gravity of that time isn’t properly portrayed in his design. Like let me emphasize, Bailu’s words might suggest that the default state for some of his injuries is literally open and bleeding so... And you might think “Oh that’s funny, when he’s literally covered in bandages like his arm and chest.” Well, I’ll one up you by clarifying if you look up his jacket as he runs, you’ll see his model has bandages ALL the way down his torso!! But the thing is, this is covered by his jacket. We only see his hand bandaged and a little peek at his chest, but his face? Completely fine. The rest of his body? Perfectly covered not showing anything. If I could change his design just a bit, first off, I’m making his coat more tattered and broken. Yes he gets his coat replaced at times, but that doesn’t mean we need to always see it in pristine condition. He’s a fighter, making his coat have tears in it, leave the edges worn down, more fabric than just his red ribbons to be frayed at the ends. In those tears of his clothes, either show bandages (left up to you whether to be seen as fresh injuries covered waiting to heal or more wrapped remnants of Jingliu’s slashes) or scars on every single bit of skin that manages to peek out from that coat. And for some flavor, add some scars to his face however big or small. There’s no way I can believe Jingliu killed him hundreds of times and didn’t at least once go for a head shot. I bet that woman knows the extent of his healing like the back of her hand, I bet she could answer my question about how exactly Blade’s body would heal if his limbs were severed. If he has some part of himself not covered, it should have evidence that he was harmed there! Never let us forget that part of his lore! NEVER!!
(I promise I’m totally not insane about him, what ever could lead you to that conclusion?)
I want to say, I will eventually update this once we have more Sam lore, perhaps I’ll include Sam with the Penacony characters post to make it easier or I’ll just redo the Stellaron Hunters post and revise and revisit my ideas for these three! As it stands, I want to wait until we have more Sam lore and more things cleared up about them before I jump into talking about the armor design or things I know from leaks until it’s been confirmed or disproven so I can give better my thoughts about the design in relation to the character!! Please stay tuned, I can’t decide if I should go for Overworld Belobog first because I have more clear ideas (including a rant about one specific character) or if it’s best to go to Herta Space Station first in order to just go in order essentially. Who knows ! Well! I hole you enjoyed this, I adore the Stellaron Hunters and any time I am able to talk about them I am very happy :D
#basically to sum it up#kafka and blade’s designs need to lean in more to certain aspects#(the drama and the trauma)#and sw’s needs to ease up on the gimmick#but overall?#some of my favorite designs in the game#MWAH love them#okay im finishing this at 3:30 am and i need to sleep so ill schedule this for later#have a good day y’all <3#the stelle redesign btw is cooking in my wips im just making notes about what i would change or explore#so i can start making concept arts for the different ideas i hav#after her will probably be either himeko or march bc im still thinking of ideas for dh#and once i have this post done i might be doing belobog next#which as a heads up#will feature one of the character design opinions I feel so strongly about that it inspired this whole series of posts#(spoiler alert: the belobog design is servals and youll understand what i mean when i say i feel strongly soon enough)#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr blade#hsr kafka#silver wolf#stellaron hunters
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#gonna make a really personal and selfish post but idk where else to write#i don’t know how to explain this to my bf cause it’s only been a month and i didn’t even get to tell him about 1d#and now ill never get to share that in the way i wanted to#this is how im gonna have to introduce and merge those part of me that are so close to my heart#and i just don’t know how to do it#we usually call when we get back from work but i couldn’t cause i broke down as soon as i came home#and i know he saw my story that’s probably why he didn’t call either#i just don’t know how to explain or if someone who didn’t experiment this can even understand#and i feel bad that he can’t be the first thing in my mind rn#and i don’t know how to say that without making it sound like a celeb is more important#but at this moment it is#cause it’s not some celeb it’s a huge part of me#i wouldn’t be here without 1d and now i have to keep going when he won’t
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These lyrics are super Michael Afton and Ennard to me. I think this is something Michael would say to Ennard while trying to comfort her and I think he would SPECIFICALLY be talking to Elizabeth here
#actually a whole post going into detail about how michael probably trauma bonded with elizabeth is probably something that ill make soon#bc it's been established as canon that Elizabeth was mentally and physically abused#and with the way Michael acts i absolutely would not be surprised if he abused in some way too#and the concept of Michael trying to comfort/help Ennard is something I'm honestly shocked the fandom hasn't tackled more often#considering how much we love hurt/comfort#fnaf#five nights at freddy’s#afton family#Michael Afton#Elizabeth Afton#ennard fnaf
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the theory that the trolley accident in Saint Denis made Dutch lose his mind is so stupid because literally 15 minutes before the accident he was going on about how he "found a man who will take us to Australia or Tahiti" please cite your source man bc is there really a dude out there that will take an entire infamous gang across the globe no questions asked for like 1000 dollars?? if he wanted the money that bad couldn't he just board 20 innocent rich people that would pay to go to Tahiti for the same amount of money and not be harboring fugitives?? am i insane am i missing something
#dc speaks!!#does this even make sense#updated my desc bc people are actually interacting with me recently and its whack (not in a bad way)#so many dutch accounts have interacted with me i didnt know you guys exist#dutch van der linde#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#i should probably make a pinned post about my boundaries and stuff#ill probably post an update on my last post soon idk
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contemplating returning to my 2000s tumblr roots and making an ask blog for my lobotomy corp OCs would anybody care about that
#project moon#lobotomy corporation#i know i still havent posted anything about them yet#but that's because i want to make a group photo of them and its taking ONE LIMBILLION YEARS#anyways ill probably delete this later i will post more soon i swear
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I hope your days aren't as heavy and dark, I am sending all the positive thoughts your way. You deserve the best, fairy princess. <3
😭
#I’ve been getting such sweet asks#I can’t tell you how much they mean to me right now#unfortunately my days have been pretty dark and overwhelming#struggling more than I ever have before tbh#and I’ve struggled most of my life so that’s saying something#also tried to go on TikTok for a little bit and oh BOY that was a bad decision#I might come back sometime soon#it’s just hard when my meds and everything have been making me very sex repulsed 😬#and half of the posts on my feed are very sexy related lol#so I guess that’s probably the main reason I haven’t been on here as much as I used to#also really don’t have the energy to reply or talk to people anymore#(sorry to anyone who has tried to DM me or contact me in any way -#I’ve barely been able to get out of bed so I definitely don’t have the energy to reply to people)#fun fact I went on TikTok finally cause everyone keeps talking about it#somehow ended up on the abortion debate side of TikTok???? so I kept seeing these bullshit debates#the final straw was the other day I saw some dipshit put as their claim ‘prochoice is a mental illness’#don’t even get me started on that it makes me so made I start to shake#I’m sorry but that is so offensive to people who are struggling with real mental illnesses???#went up as a guest (surprisingly) and was trying to explain how ridiculous that statement was and one of the people literally said#‘this is not a safe space’#lol ok byeeeee#obviously not expecting every where to be a safe space but for someone to literally SAY that is wild to me#I always try to keep a safe space no matter who I’m talking to or what about#that still is bothering me so so much#main reason why I’m still on there is cause I love this creator and want to support her as much as possible#but idk how much longer I can be on there… was even thinking about trying to post and make money over there#but ha ha ha guess not#back to square one#I’m running out of space as always but thank you so so so much for the kind words they mean the world to me!! also FAIRY princess???#I’ve never heard that before 🥹🥹🥹 thank you thank you thank you wishing you a lovely day 🫶
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Howdy everyone! I am starting off the new year with a new s/i and a new f/o thanks to my partner @cherry-bomb-ships (in case ya didn’t know x3) we’ve been watching star trek: the next generation together and pretty much from the very first episode I started crushing hard on Data 0_0 I wanted to watch a little more before making any decisions and after talking w Ruby a bit I’m already pretty crazy about him!
My self insert, Jane Callisto (yes I’m using the same last name as my star wars s/i cause I like it) was a friend of the Crushers and babysat Wesley when she was a teen, and thanks to that Beverly wrote her a letter of recommendation to get into Starfleet Academy and eventually onto the Enterprise as a schoolteacher at the age of 26! She remains close friends with Wesley, which puts her in a position to get to know a certain cute android...
#artfarts#self insert#self ship#self shipping community#self insert community#star trek selfship#crush tag: 🤖#im gonna add an official tag soon i cant use emojis on desktop sjhgk#but YEAH HHH#I FELL PRETTY HARD FOR HIM#AND U GUYS CAN EXPECT A LOT MORE POSTS AND RBS AND ART AND STUFF#cause me and ruby have been going thru it and theres...a lot to go through tbh#but ah i really like him he's SO cute and RUBY I KNOW YOU'RE SEEING THIS#thank you for watching with me ilysm x'3#OH and my s/i couldn't decide if she wanted to wear the skirt or the pants so that's kind of a modified uniform#so she could have both :3#and some days she does wear just the pants or just the skirt it all depends on mood#and probably practicality#but YEAH ah#im still learning about the world and stuff so ill probably make changes as i go along#but thats what ive got for now#happy new year everyone!!#im so happy to be around you guys#and im looking forward to what it'll be like!!
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Reminder that Kubo confirmed that the original villain of Soul Society arc was Hanataro
Not Urahara, not Ukitake.
Him.
#affectionately#bleach#bleach meta#i wonder if zangetsu and hisagomaru having parallels is because of this scrapped plot#ill probably make a post soon about that but basically#both harvest reiatsu/wounds#and condense them into red sword beams#both have a monochromatic human like zanpakuto spirit with a white body and black eyes#said zanpakuto spirits may look human but aren't#zangetsu is a hollow and is mimicking ichigo's appearance#hisagomaru is a robot/doll#and robots/dolls are based on the form of a human#so like zangetsu hisagomaru is mimicking the human appearance#both zangetsu and hisagomaru are the only zanpakuto in bleach to be in constant release#maybe kubo later thought of making him a traitor working for aizen but scrapped it for the same reason#think of how heartbreaking it would be though😭#ichigo was literally the first person to treat hana nicely#rukia talked to him a bit but it was just naturally not really nicely per se#unlike rukia ichigo always believed in hana being more talented and capable than he thinks and would compliment him on it#if anyone yelled at him or just acted rude towards him ichigo would defend him right away#so for hana to originally betray him like that#arrancar arc would've been painful af but tbh he has a motivation everyone just abuses him daily in ss#he really should just leave and go somewhere safer but cant#hanataro yamada#yamada hanataro#hanataro#jushiro ukitake#ukitake jushiro#sosuke aizen#aizen sosuke
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i need to stop forgetting things exist the fucking second they leave my field of vision. why is is impossible for two things to occupy my mind at once especially when im tired. like. i feel like a sim. i feel like actions are being canceled and i just. move on. and completely forget what i was doing moments before. i fucking hate it
#i feel like it’s getting worse too#like its always hasn’t been great but the past few weeks have been especially bad#why can’t i remember things!! why is my short term memory sucking ass!!!!!!#like if i don’t write/type things down i loose it#making me wanna rip my hair out what the fuck is going on!!!!!#gonna start playing those phone games that improve memory or whatever#it’s either that or going to my mom for an essential oil recommendation#i know it’s probably some undiagnosed shit but im also like. i can’t keep blaming whatever is wrong with my brain because its a problem with#/me/. ya know?? like. yeah it is something with my brain. obviously. but i need to take some sort of action to fix it. and i dont know what#that action is#besides the two options i said before#or carrying a fucking notebook around and writing down everything. which is stupid also and i know won’t last a week#problem is im gonna forget about any rule i come up with since as soon as im preoccupied with something else. i’ll forget the rule#i would need a hat with the reminder on paper tapped to the hat#so it’s always dangling in front of my eyes#i don’t know what else to do at this point!!!!#it’s making me so worried about going away for college. cause yeah i did really well at community. but if i have the deteriorating memory#of a goldfish who’s constantly banging its head against the glass. how am i gonna make it through university.#i love writing essays in the tags that no one will read <3#having a ball rn. a great time. not feeling like a waste of resources at all rn. feeling great.#if my mom doesn’t let me wear my earbuds tomorrow i think ill scream#anyways. gonna bake some blueberry lemon sweet rolls tomorrow#me rambling#i love being undiagnosed#but let’s be real#being diagnosed won’t give me anything other than more of an excuse#because i can’t go on meds with my current living situation#and i also don’t really want to go on meds because i don’t trust them#feeling silly i think ill actually post this one maybe someone has a suggestion for what to do#vent
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Goodnight wonderful people who live in my phone!!!
#im sappy and you guys are so cool ;-;#im a bit of a hermit and really bad at meeting with (or moved far from) irl friends so my connections on here have been really meaningful#dont know how to say that without sounding like a loser but i promise its a good thing lol#but anyway i queued a post earlier today about friends thinking of you all the time#and i kinda just repeated it in my tags and ill probably just repeat it again now but its true#there are so many mundane things that make me think of the kind people ive met#i love bonding about interests and characters but theres also little peeks of each others lives#jokes and facts and songs and favorite animals that make me go 🫵 my friend likes that!!!#and dates! ill be like 'oh my friend is doing X today across the globe :)' 'ah i hope my friends X went well across the country :)'#'i remember they love this food/hate this food/has never tried this food :)'#'i remember them talking about how much they like this song :)'#'oh i learned a new saying like this in their language :)'#i hope they feel better from being sick#i hope their pets vet visit went well#i hope they got a good grade on that project#i hope they can rest after work#i hope theyre happy with their haircut#i hope they can dress like they want soon#i hope theyre happy#i hope theyre happy.#i hope theyre happy i hope theyre happy i hope theyre happy!!!#oh shit. cryin in the club. (<- my bed.) not even drunk or hormonal just SAPPY WTH#i have to keep up my intimidating and stoic reputation!!!#so goodnight!!!!!!#i love you!!!!!!!!#rose rambles
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I'm starting to see ppl talk abt updating their artfight pages and at first I was like what why it's still months away and then it hit me that by months it was two months and now I'm just silently sweating as my anual side project to remake the eternal gales refs and give them all icons comes back to haunt me
#rat rambles#oc posting#well I mean the good news is that all the staliens are already done and Ive already started on the human kids#the bad news is that theres still 5 more refs for me to remake and 9 icons if I decide to commit to that#the only one Ill probably force myself to do is sprinkles since shes the only stalien that doesnt have one and I dont want to leave her out#the human kids might just not get them tho especially since theres other characters Id like to make refs and icons for too#not as many newbies to the field this year which is a good thing since I do not have a lot of space left for new characters lol#Im probably going to take it easy this year in terms of my goals for artfight since last year I crashed and burned Hard#hopefully Ill have the time and motivation to draw a decent amount but if I dont Ill try not to be too broken up about it#especially since Ill probably burn myself out a bit doing the last minute ref rush lol#its not necessary especially since all the guys who needed the new refs most got theirs but Id like for them to be on the same page#I also went ahead and cleaned up my page a lil bit to make my life easier in the future#I should probably update bios and stuff but I dont feel like it Im too tired#tomorrow Im definitely going to need to clean some more as I have been for nearly every day#I mean guess thats why Im here in part#last week of pet sitting tho so soon Ill be back home again#Im not sure if Im excited or dreading it cause while I miss my family I also have been rly enjoying a house to myself#like its not necessary easy to do all the chores and stuff but it's a lot easier to do said chores when Im alone#and Ive actually been waking up at reasonable times too like not having my mom floating around is doing wonders#its almost making me rethink my insistence that I couldnt live alone but I definitely think itd get to me in the long term I need people#I just wish there was a better middleground since having people constantly in the house stresses me out so bad#it leads to me hiding out all day in my room and that's just not good for me#but its not like I could live by myself even if I wanted to#at this rate I dont think Ill ever move out but lets not think abt how much worse that could be for me thats future me's problem
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