#ill just keep on keeping on and see how things go whatever

[argonautsoul]

“Oh, to be able to be admired, cared for, loved, without needing to do any other thing than existing. No need to fight. Just to care, and nourish one and each other...”

Love isn’t something you feel, though. It’s something you do. And so,

loving someone is loving who they are.

When people feel that they are not understood, it frequently is due to not enough empathy going both ways...

[Text ID: “I would have preferred if you had loved me less and understood me more.”]

Here, one is actually saying: “I was in love with the fantasy relationship I wanted him/her to give me, but s/he wasn't offering me that; (I didn't like the way s/he was treating me)”.

Whatever you understand about your partner is your perspective. It is not what s/he really is. Whatever you attribute to your partner is in relation to you.

True love is based on accepting each other as they are... and you can't love something that you actually don't like... you can't love the other one if you don't actually enjoy the way s/he makes you feel.

Preferences are more about us than the other person, so first, try to give yourself what you are seeking from your date or partner.

Love isn't about trying to change someone to fit our idea of perfect.

What's more,

Forever, one can not fully understand the other one at all. This is the beauty of how they were created. Therefore, there is conflict between them.

Even within ourselves, there are/can be some deep-seated subconscious behaviours and beliefs that we don’t understand.

It is about accepting the whole person, even the parts you don't fully understand or agree with.

People's personalities change and grow over time. As you go through life together, you'll see new sides of each other. True love allows for that growth and accepts the ever-changing nature of your partner, even as their outer personality shifts. 

Any relationship is in a state of change, part of which is continuous knowledge of the other.

“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.”

 — Fred Rogers

And hence, constant effort is needed to accept and adjust themselves to keep up with the changing lifestyles along the way with the changing society.

It takes time to grow together. And we want the maturity in a relationship that comes with time, the emotional connect that develops over years, that sense of belonging when we barely even know the other person... Apparently, nothing is worth our time, effort, and patience. Not even love. Relationships, however, require energy and participation.

Cognitive biases can be particularly damaging because they distort our perceptions and interpretations of our partners' actions and motives.

Cognitive bias is so difficult to acknowledge, understand, or be aware of within ourselves because we actively protect our beliefs. Sometimes, this means denying truth or new information that comes to us (a la cognitive dissonance).

In addition,

Depressed people don’t have the energy, and if they are caught up in the very common mode of isolation because of their depression they are definitely not participating... sometimes, there is an element of mental illness involved in this arena in general.

Lastly,

We don't really need an intellectual twin who can finish our sentences.

And that level of interconnection isn’t necessary. As long as they treat you appropriately, even if they don’t understand you completely, you can still have a very fulfilling relationship.

Love is a commitment, not about the mushy gushy feelings.

Let the commitment be the beginning of understanding. 

══════☸☸☸══════

Too often, in this culture, we cloud the picture, overanalyze, fear those conscious efforts, and insist that love means something very definable and ultimately acceptable — don’t get sucked into the madness, stay in your true path and please, please find a partner who is similar to you (i.e., hold similar values), who cares about your thoughts and feelings, and genuinely enjoys your company.

And read “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. It’s eye-opening to realize that someone may be figuratively shouting their love from the rooftops — but you aren’t “hearing” it. Communication is key, as long as you understand your partner’s language.

.

Margarita Karapanou, tr. by Karen Emmerich, from Rien ne va plus

[Text ID: “I would have preferred if you had loved me less and understood me more.”]

[cerealmonster15]

[prev]

Looks like Idia found the courage to come COMPLAIN at Jade for taking over last poll.

Jade is following protocol, of course 😌

I think Idia forgot about the mistletoe part, and got a little caught off guard 🫢

[datvtranscripts]

The Crossroads Quests

Memory: The Labs Below

The Crossroads Masterpost

The party comes across a strange mist in the crossroads. They slide down a hill to start the memory.

First memory found: Rook: What’s going on here?

Found memories before: Rook: Another ancient elf.

Party comments:

Bellara: That poor spirit's being held prisoner.

Lucanis: That spirit. It's a prisoner.

Davrin: Prisoners. An imprisoned spirit?

Emmrich: An imprisoned spirit. This can only bode ill.

Neve: Is that spirit a prisoner?

Taash: Someone hurt that spirit. Locked it up.

Tarasahl: You're awake! How's your head? The guards really knocked you about.

Rook: Well, it's….

Tarasahl: Do you remember our mission? Ghilan'nain's lab? The Wolf sent us to infiltrate her testing grounds. Things didn't go… perfectly to plan. But the Wolf smuggled in help: a key. If you can fight, grab the key and we'll run for it. Just be ready for whatever the witch has in store.

First memory found: Rook: It's like all she sees is another ancient elf. One of Solas's agents…?This is a memory. We're seeing Solas's past.

Found memories before: Rook: She thinks I'm one of Solas's agents.

Rook picks up the nearby key.

Tarasahl: Ah, freedom! We'll move faster if we split up. See you ahead!

The spirit vanishes, and Rook enters the lab.

Rook: Blight. Be careful.

Party comments:

Bellara: Is it real blight? Or just a memory?

Davrin: It feels… older, here. More primal.

Emmrich: Let us hope it's not so potent in a memory.

Harding: Ugh. Somehow it's even more revolting here.

Neve: Is it just me, or does it look worse than usual here?

Taash: This vashedan's getting everywhere.

Darkspawn begins to rise from the blight and attack.

First memory found: Rook: These are more than just memories! Fight!

Found memories before: Rook: Remember, these "memories" pack a punch!

The defeat the darkspawn.

Rook: So Ghilan'nain was experimenting with blight and darkspawn… the blight infested her lab.

First memory found: Rook: If it's a memory, let's go with it. We need to find our way out before Ghilan'nain finds us.

Found memories before: Rook: The memory's not over. We need to fight our way out of here before Ghilan'nain finds us.

They continue on into a room where some stairs appear. The spirit from before appears along with a much younger looking Solas.

Tarasahl: Wolf! You came for us? Your key was enough.

Solas: This unnatural corruption demanded my personal attention. It is… strong. It has already blocked the escape route I had planned. We will need another way to the surface.

Tarasahl: Let's all split up and find it.

Solas: I will destroy what corruption I can. You must cut through these monstrosities before Ghilan'nain unleashes something worse.

Rook: Solas sounded… rattled.

Party comments:

Bellara: He was spooked. By the blight, I mean.

Davrin: The blight shook him up.

Emmrich: Even then, the blight frightened him.

Harding: The blight really had him scared.

Lucanis: He was afraid of the blight.

Neve: The blight had him scared.

They enter the next room to find some kind of blight puzzle.

Ghilan'nain: You see boundless creation, and choose to destroy it? Learn respect for the life that will succeed you.

Rook: She's using the testing grounds against us.

Rook solves the puzzle and reveals the way forward.

Rook: Time to go!

Ghilan'nain: Free? And faster than anticipated. Perhaps you and your allies warrant more study.

They exit the lab and find more, different kind of darkspawn.

Rook: We've got company!

They defeat them and keep moving.

Rook: I think we broke through to Ghilan'nain's prize specimens.

Bellara: She experimented on those darkspawn so long ago… why do they look so familiar? What if…

Davrin: These darkspawn may be an old memory, but they look familiar. I wonder…

Emmrich: The ancient darkspawn in this memory look familiar. Almost as if…

Harding: If this is what darkspawn looked like when Ghilan'nain was experimenting, then…

Lucanis: If these darkspawn are from long ago, why do they look so familiar? It's almost as if…

Neve: Rook. Think of the darkspawn we've faced, compared to these. What if…?

Rook: Maybe the darkspawn we've been seeing aren't new. Maybe they're old.

As they enter the next area, more stairs appear. Ghilan’nain stands over Fen’Harel’s agent.

Ghilan'nain: Here. The blessing you deny.

Tarasahl: Wolf! Help me! (Pained yell)

She is taken by blight.

Rook: Damn. Ghilan'nain got her!

Tarasahl: My blood. I'm burning up…

they are attacked by more darkspawn.

Rook: Look out!

After defeating the darkspawn, they walk into a scene where Solas nears by his agent. Ghilan’nain stands on the stairs ahead.

Solas: You would unleash a blight on this world and call it a masterwork! You, who were the most sensitive of us…

Ghilan'nain: All that I am belongs to the pursuit of creation. You chose to constrain yourself. I must climb to the heights only understood by gods. I go now to join them.

Wolf… You are greater than any of them. Please. Help me.

Dialogue options:

He wont help her. Rook: He's too afraid of the blight to do anything but end her pain.

Solas, try a cure. Rook: Come on. Be the god she needs. Help her…

Solas: I am so sorry I failed you. There is only one way I can help you now.

Tarasahl: Wolf…

Solas stands.

Solas: This place, and the corruption within it, must be eradicated. No trace can be allowed to spread. Go. Your work here is done. There is no need for you to witness what I must do.

The memory ends.

Rook: It's over. Solas destroyed the lab, the blight that was here… and his agent.

Bellara: He wasn't just her leader, he was her god. And this is her reward?

Davrin: If I really thought I could stop the blight for good… wonder what I would've done.

Emmrich: One of the first times Ghilan'nain experimented with the blight, perhaps, but not the last.

Harding: He was so ready to burn it all. Friends included. Not much has changed.

Lucanis: Not every death is kind. But to betray loyalty… a man like that must be watched closely.

Neve: I'm sure he sees some greater good. The people in his way to get there—not as much.

Taash: Don't know if he could've helped her. But he didn't even try.

A wolf statuette appears near the memory exit.

First memory found: Rook: This… fragment might tell us more.

Found memories before: Rook: And now the memory's gone. Sort of… condensed into that statuette. Maybe there's more it can tell us.

[glitter-stained]

A bit from the BtFC fic. Jason at the start of his spiralling.

...................................

“Bat’s been gone, they’re saying.”

“He ain’t really gone man. That thing can’t die.”

“Oh yeah? The birds die, don’t they? Why not the big bad bat?”

“’Cause a bird isn’t a bat, that’s why, you-“

“What did ya just call me-“

“They’re gonna rush in, I’m tellin’ you, all the loonies and whatever the hell those things are-“

He tries to lose himself in the chatter. Drown himself in it. He came here for that. The drink he ordered an hour ago still sits untouched. That won’t be enough to drown in. It is the voices that he needs. The arguments, the shouts, the simple, unfiltered, ugly noise of one of the worst dives of the city.

The voices are rough, angry, feeding into whatever fire is clawing at his skin. But they are still better than the other voice, the one that won’t go away. Why can’t he shut up? He ought to be quiet. The dead ought to be quiet.

 “…secret…” “…needs repair…” “…a good doctor…”

“Secret” Jason echoes the word once again, his voice a ragged whisper. “Secret. It was our secret.”

 And then Bruce put that into words. The secret they were meant to bury in silence. He promised. Bruce promised. You should keep your promises. She never did. They never do.

He shouldn’t have spoken. Bruce shouldn’t have put it into words. To name them gives them power. Bruce didn’t name it…but he spoke out loud.

 And what more did he say, in the other messages? The messages meant for his true sons? His heir?

He didn’t keep his promise. He never keeps his promises. Dammit, you should know that by now. Promises are made to be broken.

 Jason feels eyes on him and glances up. Whatever the spectator sees in his face has the old fool hurriedly getting to his feet and making for the door. He feels moisture on his face and realizes at some point he started crying.

Okay, "character is entering a mental illness episode, their facial expression (which they aren't aware of) frightens someone and they realize they're crying" is now officially one of my favourite trope (is it a trope? Can I call it a trope? Can we make it a trope? The confrontation between the external rejection and intimate suffering is brutal I love it)

(Also not linked to psychology itself but "the dead ought to be quiet" followed by Jason whispering, and the contrast between Jason whispering and the loud voices in and out of his head at the start of the spiral is pretty great. Ghostboy McHauntingThemes in the flesh.)

The cultural myth about Batman feeding into Jason's turmoil, putting Batman as some kind of creature incapable of dying, talk about a pedestal...

Jason's fixating on the trauma but incapable of naming it even to himself, furious at Bruce for doing so. The "it was our secret" part that really gives the ick because that kind of "keep it in the family" sentiment is so common in toxic/abusive systems

The breach of trust from "he wasn't supposed to mention it out loud" to "what if he said something else to the others" + "promises are never kept" -> anxiety spiral + hints of black and white thinking. He should have kept a secret (Bruce)/She never did (Catherine)/They never do (Sheila? Willis?) The emphasis on the repeated broken promises and abandonment, like he's identifying a clear pattern of broken, betrayed trust and he's the common denominator: "you should know that by now."

Also Jason drinking alone and someone running from him and the subtle mention of his estrangement (qualifying the others as the real sons) all emphasizing how truly alone he is.

I'm eating this up, anon. This is the good stuff, for real

[benetnvsch]

guys,, today I totally embarrassed myself in front of people I found cool but I also did buy the tastiest rosemary and garlic herb olive oil possibly ever so who's the real winner,,,

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[wormchaser]

you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.

i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.

[fleouriarts]

feeling bad about my art lately. will probably not post for a while. but i wanted to at least dump some stuff here before i retreat into my hidey hole

[megumi-fm]

.

[itsalwaysdark]

i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

[wonho-ssi]

[cryolyst]

~

[whsprings]

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[todayisafridaynight]

Since you mentioned it, what did you think of Speak No Evil? I was thinking of watching it myself :0

i really liked it ............ my friend scoffed at me when i told her i was watchin it so take my opinion with a grain of salt tho </3

[analogicom]

Ohhh I must find someone who Makes Outfits. If I want Earl's entire outfit I need someone who can actually make that. and I need someone in mind so I remember to save my money for it. Does anyone know anybody who Makes Outfits

[phagodyke]

damn I rly have another 4 weeks of holiday this year huh. I should start making some plans