#iguess rant?

[yourlocalbadgerscales]

I sit there, behind my desk. Thinking it’s all over. For now, at least. No, I’m not even thinking about it. Just watching, watching the movie. It’s happy, it’s sweet.

The mother grabs her daughter’s wrist. I freeze.

The mother raises her voice. I stare blankly.

The mother throws the daughter’s clothes at her and pulls her up harshly by the wrist. I blink and try to breathe.

The mother drags her daughter down the stairs. Suddenly violent, violent, when did this happen, how, what, why, I should have been warned but how could I have been, I had no idea this would happen, why am I reacting like this? I know why I am reacting like this. I just never expected it to happen.

Panic hits with full force. No one sees the way my knuckles whiten around the edge of the chair I’m sitting on. No one sees my breathing intensify and my eyes watering.

The daughter breaks something. I almost close my eyes, waiting for the punch to hit her across the face, waiting for the mother to wrestle her daughter to the floor and hit her, over and over and over until she’s screaming and begging and sobbing. It doesn’t happen. The mother cries silently, the daughter begs for forgiveness over and over.

I recognise it all, as well. But the punches never came. Why no punishment? Why no more suffering? Why did it end so quickly?

Why is my life so fucked up? Why can’t I breathe why can’t I breathe why can’t I breathe why can I breathe why can’t I breathe why can’t I breathe

[emo-rabbit]

OOC

Sometimes my fictive ass forgets I lived through my show, like damn… yes I can have flashbacks but then l’ll be like “omg, I feel so bad for Raph…” LIKE IM NOT HIM!? LIKE IM JUST ME! I also feel bad for stupid stuff like treating my source mates like fictional characters outside of our system.

[princessgemma12]

thinking about how, despite the one group of asshats and their bullshittery that I had to get a faculty member involved for, I'm still generally Safer on campus than at home.

not physically but emotionally.

I have people who Understand my academic jargon and creative writing lingo and who enjoy having long, semi-loud conversations about craft elements and the way Srah Waters queer-coded Caroline in The Little Stranger (2009).

I have people I can say to "I'm rotating Alastor in my head" and be perfectly understood (and not judged for my Autisticness). I can say "I can't do that tonight, I wanna work on a project" and not be ridiculed for it, not be huffed at and be accused of being "boring" as if I'm talking to a child and not a woman an entire year older than I am.

I can have conversations with a group of people and say "I'm sorry, I didn't catch that, can you please repeat yourself so I may hear you?" and not be scoffed at, not be glared at and given attitude just for having the audacity to ask for words to be repeated so I can continue with the conversation.

I can tell the people in my life "hey, I'm having the Mental Illness, I'm gonna hole up in bed and do Me Things (write, read, watch my favs, eat good food and drink good drinks) until I feel human again and I have enough energy to do Social Person Things" and not be huffed at, not be told "I have no sympathy" and patronized for being "lazy;" I can say I need to be alone and be alone.

I can say "I'm too tired to do That Thing I Said I Would Do right now, I will in a little bit after I've had a Recharge and some coffee--I'll Take My Remembering Steps (i.e., setting an alarm, writing a note)" and 1.) it only affects me, and 2.) I won't be called a hypocrite

... even though saying "You can't keep pushing things off onto other people just because you don't want to do it" and "If there's something preventing you from being able to do it, you need to say something so we can talk work with it" and "You need to figure out how to Remember To Do The Things; let us try to help, we've all done it for ourselves" do not in any way contradict "I'm not up to it now, but I'll set a reminder for about two hours from now, I should be fine to get it done by then."

I can say "Hey, that kind of language makes me Uncomfortable, please use something else/avoid it around me" and be respected. I can say "Hey, having things shoved or waved in my face really suddenly triggers my anxiety, please don't mess around with it" and be respected, be... not ridiculed for being mentally ill by a mentally ill person.

I can say "Hey, I know I'm in Public Space with you right now, but I need to do something Very Important just Real Quick, can you please be quiet for a minute?" and not be told "Just go to your room." I can say "hey, I need to do Very Important Things so I'm going to go to my room (dorm); please let me be a while" and not have the sound of clanging dishes or uncontrolled cackling echo through the house and fuck me up--I can be not bothered when requested.

when Someone is being too loud, I can say "Hey, I'm trying to work" and not be told "that's not work, that's writing" or "just ignore it."

basically, my sister has no self-awareness or respect, and is a walking hazard to my mental health. and she lives at home. and I have to go home in a month and some-odd weeks. and deal with her being a total asswipe toward my existence. yay

[illshitty]

SCOTUS Reform

Electoral college reform, protecting abortion at the federal level, fighting climate change, gun control.

These things are all achievable, but only if you WIN ELECTIONS. And I'm not talking about big national popularity contests. They require retaking the House and Senate, in some cases with large majorities. And that requires voting in your local elections, and if you don't win the majorities you need, voting in them again. And again. And maybe volunteering for campaigns, and hell maybe running yourself. It's difficult and it's never done.

Progress is hard work and the wins can be incremental, but determination is what makes the difference. The far right didn't take over our country overnight, they've been chipping away it for decades and what we're witnessing is the fruits of their perseverance. They will crawl through broken glass to vote for someone they hate if it will get them an inch closer to their goals.

[jsdhwdmax56]

"The Lord made Adam AND Eve. not Adam and Steve!"

...but Adam AND Eve betrayed the Lord's trust, created the Original Sin AND gets banished from Eden.

[tiny-vermin]

shoutout to midori notebooks that hold my watercolours more beautifully than any paper ive ever used tbh... + the paper is so thin youd THINK it break under all that water but it just takes everything like the KING it is. and minimal buckling AND its in a sketchbook so i dont inevitably lose the painting to the corners of my room. notebooks made for fountain pen r just built different iguess????? anyways. paper rant. the fact that they LOOK amazing and stylish (yet very simple) also is just so inspiring i want to fill it with sketches and ideas ... very unlike any other sketchbook ive had where it feels like im trudging through the pages. fabriano ur paper is good but . cant compare tbh

[wabunguss]

I LOVE HOW U DREW CRONUS BUT LIKE..... why that sollux cronus art like baby gurl please ur better than that please please please just draw cronus eating dirt or something bc that artwork gave off weird vibes

sorry it took like forever to reply i was busy at school but i get where ur coming from

rant underneath cut because i dont wanna clog my shit up lol

but like,,, that wasnt my intention for the artwork whatsoever?! idk what about that artwork implied any kind of proshittery or whatever asides from the flushed shit

i guess i shouldve specified about age because im pretty sure most of the fandom views everyone as minors and not post game adults epilogue shit and my art style doesnt help with age whatsoever idk maybe ill try a new art style for shit like that

also i thought proshipper was something you identified as and not something assigned to you !? like no im not a proshipper i understand that fiction really does affect reality because thats just the way shit works.

ALSO also i dont ship the ship myself, it was just a request i was fulfilling,, not sure if that makes a difference

idk why ur wasting ur time on me even tho im not a proshipper like theres plenty of proshippers in this fandom ive seen it myself

idk i can take the post down if u recommend it because i dont want to be seen as a proshitter but im not sure thatd help at all plus i didnt mean to imply anything like weird w that i just like drawing BLUSHING PPLEASE EEE

okay iguess ill go draw cronus eating dirt lmao

tldr: nuh uh

[aftonsparv-bugzz]

:33 < rant

:33 < being a system is just.... so scary. i constantly have mental breakdowns, idont permit "myself" to look at "me" in the mirror, idont know who "i"am because iam not me. its a group of people. it feels so insane, like im not real. people call me by my name in which idont realise iam me or at least supposed to be. ihave so much confusion in life, so much amnesia and unawareness, its crazy. i just want to be freed and alone. we dont particularly like each other either. icant stare at myself normally. i seem to have to have a mental breakdown. ifeel so out of place. so abnormal. the others themselves get scared. we barely know who we are. am i the host ? really ?? did the actual host go dormant years ago ?? i question this daily because it dosent seem like im the actual me more like a fake version, or a figment of the original. a place holder. yea sure, icall myself the original, but am i really ?? maybe buzy knows, but then again buzy also is a little.... much. shes trying to.... well idont really wanna say it so yea. she wouldnt exactly be of much help. maybe all the others named s ? imeannnn theyre kinda the same as buzy. and its not exactly like we talk to eachother. imean yea, our headspace is super boring, but we kinda enjoy being alone and dont talk to eachother so iguess. thats. alright. idont know im probably just gonna stop this

[the-best-syndrome]

intro !!⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

hey !! this is like. my 4th attempt at creating an intro on here cause tumblr kept deleting the rest but whatever !! youcan call me anything currently in my bio, im a minor, alterhuman, ect. igot invited here by the host of this community and decided to join !! isaw everyone making cute little intro posts and decided to make one as well !! ^_^

ihave avpd, im plural, and have other personality/disorders that i typically dont bring up.(but might here !!) im also on the schizospectrum and am VERY delusion-prone and hallucinate quite a bit. also very prone to panic attacks with or without reason. please be nice !! imight not post here often due to my avpd messing me up and making me really anxious cause of judgement, so you'll probably only see me here for stuff like vents, rants, slight talking, ect, but iguess this introductory post will help you get to know me better !! ^u^

before you get to know me: im a minor, plural, very delusion and panic attack prone and not ok with reality checking whatsoever, hallucinate, have bad english + wasnt born english + am not american and so do not have that time system, can be quite mean, rude, disrespectful and disregarding of emotions and people, ect. very egotistical, very angry person, very emotional, very anxious, very over the top, will probably be very venty here, ect.

that should be it for now, please just check my dni on my main page @aftonsparv-bugzz !! it'll be in the pinned post, thanks !! bye !! ^_^

[unhingedlesbear]

Omg hey I'm back I'm sorry for responding so late i was outside but back to the bugs. I like budwig mantis because they have like insane hunting habits?? I like them mainly cause the aggressive habits of mainly the females in that species is interesting and slightly disturbing like theyd be threatened by any predator and they'd still try to jump it (queen behaviors iguess???)I also like their patterns and their silly little faces. I think hissing cockroaches are really cute idc what anybody says because that silly little guy is just minding his buisness most of the time. I also like spiders a bit but I'm scared of them but I like to learn about them because some of them have such unique abilities like the diving bell spider oh or jumping spiders (sorry for ranting but long story short bugs are severely underrated and overhated)

No worries!! And OMG?? That is SUCH queen behavior actually 😭😭can confirm that mantises just REALLY don't care how big something is, they'll still go for it (My mantis has gone for ME before) and ur so right abt their patterns! They're such unique looking mantises! Mantises with wings like that always look so pretty I stg! And hissing cockroaches ARE cute! They're super gentle and harmless too, they don't even bite bc their mouths are too small! They also can recognize and prefer individual humans which is amazing to me! And YEAH spiders are also super cool! (I keep three spiders; a tarantula, jumping spider and house spider) and I'll admit myself I used to be slightly creeped out by them! Not REALLY creeped out but enough that I wouldn't handle them without issue like other invertebrates 😭after keeping my three for a while though I've found myself hardly bothered at all! Do you have any particular favourite spiders? But no ur so right! And I don't mind at all I LOVE talking abt bugs bc they ARE so underrated and overhated, their world is a whole different one from ours and so many people dismiss them or fear them too much to even acknowledge how fascinating it all is!

[feheroestips]

Anyway on a real serious note which I’ve tried alluding to before with heroes, an in itself this is a really big tip, but when it comes to ivs, please stop asking yourself “Are they Salvageable?” or "Are they trash?” because by doing that your think negatively when you should be happy you got the character you wanted!!!! 

Please don’t trash your Hector because oh he’s -def or Sack off that PA Azura because she’s -spd, they are still valuable units!!!! It actually pains me to see people get upset when they find the unit doesn’t have the best idea, its okay to complain about it, but please keep your head up high! I know there’s a stigma in some groups were its perfect ivs or else ‘you shouldn’t even use the character then lol”

Who cares if they’re minus attack, speed defence etc, you have them!!!! While 3 or 4 points can make a difference, its not the end of the world, for example due to the 8% banner I’ve been asked is -atk Sanaki trash? Should I fodder her for triangle adept? and if you look at her stats she goes from what 37 attack to 34. 34 is still insane, for reference that’s more attack than Brave Lyn at base.

If you’re still struggling to grasp what I mean, for any fire emblem fan out there whose played pokemon right now, you still beat the game right? Even though the pokemon you caught had ivs on a much worse scale than what heroes offers including natures too? Its the same with heroes, sure there’s optimal ivs but even negative ones are still usable.

When I, or any other site makes a set it’s always suggest ivs, in a ideal world, its not mandatory sure ivs might incline you to another set but that choice is up to you. I’m not saying Make your +def Delthea into a Tank but she can work fine either with or without good ivs. Sure if it’s a 3 or 4 star its a lot easier to get the ivs you want, which hey is a really big boon on 4 stars and means its easier to hunt but please don’t spend all your money for one good iv one, unless you are willing to dish out the cash or you can’t have it any other way.

For anyone who follows my blog, or my personal you know my +10 Lukas I worked so hard for is savage, able to solo things like tempest trials and you know what? he’s +spd -hp. What’s considered bad by a lot of people ( I won’t get into why I keep those ivs here that’s another story). The moral here is ivs as important as they seem they are, are really not.

I’ll leave you in the words of L’Archel;

"Rather than lament what you do not possess, you should treasure what you do."

[nico00235]

I wanna talk about S3 so bad, let me ramble about this, Wukong's and MK clothes during this season

‼️Season 3 | Specials spoilers ahead‼️

BC THERE'S SO MUCH DETAIL AND I THINK SOMETHING THEY DID IS INTENTIONALLY A PARALLEL OR SMTHING, but ok, first of all, let me get my things. UhHH, also, this is a very long and messy post so, yeah,

____

Ok, first of all I want to point that in LMK, at least, the clothes and that stuff is important to the series, because they represent what each person means, in addition to aesthetic aspects and to determine personalities and other things.

But there's one set of clothes that I think it was to tell and portray something very important that happened in season 3.

We all know the set of clothes that Wukong wears from the first season, which consists of his red scarf, what appears to be a wooden chestplate and other things, something that is very characteristic of him are his colors, specifically being yellow, red and a type of aquamarine and we all know what happened in the first episode of S3, we know that Wukong was incapacitated, powerless and his clothes were LITERALLY torn apart because of the shield protection being destroyed, and that's why they bring us this a little later

This

After his clothes are literally destroyed he has no choice but to wear his old clothes, the same ones he has worn in his youth, this is when we realize something.

This slight change was more or less intentional, even more so knowing that from the third season everything went downhill. The third season was a huge development process for several characters, especially MK.

Without the staff, without his powers, and with nothing to defend himself and his friends with, MK tries every possible way to follow Wukong's footsteps, literally all of his steps, being unconscious that it is not a good idea to do, at least not in the full literal sense, his way of showing that he still can and is still capable of being useful is to follow the example of Wukong, who despite being incapacitated by getting the samadhi map he still fights.

We see how he literally copies Wukong's jokes and way of acting, which in his own words is to be "impulsive and launch without thinking twice", which takes most of the time to put at risk his life and that of others, as shown in the first episode of S3, throwing himself into the fight against Macaque without considering that he no longer has power and that because he didn't think through his actions, he could have severely hurt his friends who were on the ship.

But after that, the really important thing comes, the first episode was just the beginning, once the adventure starts we see how both MK and Wukong change places in a metaphorical way

In the second episode we see this transition being clearer, seeing how MK now has the colors of Wukong and I don't know if I'm the only one but the first time I saw it, I thought it was funny and strange when they put that magical and significant transition for just a change of clothes but I think that looking more closely, everything was intentional.

And once THIS happens, we realize that from here, MK is being tested.

MK is being tested to prove that he can be the best possible version of himself through his mentor, and without his mentor. The clothes are a metaphor that despite the fact that Wukong does not do anything relevant during the first 8 episodes of the season is still an important part for MK, to remind him of where he came from and who he is successor to.

MK, despite admiring his mentor, he is much better in several aspects than Wukong himself, being more mature, more aware and all this comes to light in S3 once you look closely.

And if you realize, from this change everything makes sense, the colors and the meaning were changed now.

Which leads us to this special quote.

"Sometimes, to find what we've lost we need to begin where we started, look our inner selves"

MK changed to the colors that his mentor has, but now Wukong is the one with the clothes that he once had in his youth.

Throughout the season we see Wukong being more childish than normal, even making jokes in life or death situations, although in the first and second seasons he is aware of everything and even clever in a few situations, in the third season it seems that he does random things until he comes up with a specific plan, without first thinking through what could happen.

In amnesia rules we see in more detail how young Wukong was, the one who was in JTTW, this Wukong seems to have very little awareness about his surroundings and is dedicated to doing acts totally without consideration, the greatest act is when he asks the dwarf where the demon that had Tang was, he literally stays a whole night doing what? listening to the stories they told him, if Tang had no way to defend himself and the scorpion demoness had captured him to eat him, Tang would probably be dead.

Reckless and immature, Wukong doesn't seem to care too much what happens to other people but that's not entirely true.

Wukong understands what a family is, he understands what it is to have friends and people who care about you and your safety, but as they say, time is cause, time is consequence.

Imagine that you are an immortal, who has already lost all his allies and all his friends over time, and has been left alone, 500 years do not fly by and we really do not know how long he has been alone.

But we know that it is enough time not to be able to finish maturing and learn to communicate your needs and problems.

He said that he didn't even plan to live long enough to train someone and even in this episode he says it explicitly, he is aware that he could not teach but nevertheless he tries, in his best possible way.

The metaphor here is that MK matured in the aspects that Wukong could not and Wukong tried to recognize the problems of his past that still tormented him, genuinely recognize that he must learn to speak and above all also listen to others.

They both matured in some way, but Wukong's change was even slower than MK's because he was the one who caused the problems in episode 9 and 10 and it was until the specials when he realized that he should not do any of this alone and without first communicating with others

During the specials, we see a major change as well, how MK is wearing Pigsy's jacket, which could symbolize a meaning like what his family and friends means to him

"As long as I have my friends by my side, this world is perfect"

And that brings us to the last change of clothes MK had.

The old and original jacket, the one that has accompanied him and the symbol of what MK has always been, the successor, the hero, the warrior, the friend, the son, the assistant, everything that is Monkie Kid, not Monkey King, Monkie Kid.

Everything that being MK symbolizes can be established by that little symbol and everything that it represents for him and others to be Monkie Kid, a separate version of what Wukong is or could be.

That's why the change of clothes was so important for this season and it was somewhat intentional.

___

And that's all....

This was so long ohmygOd, i just-

I'm sorry, i overanalyze too much

[youtalktoomuch]

seeing so much character discourse on my dash is always so funny bc i see all these people making paragraph long posts to each other discussing and theorizing these characters' traumas, relationships, past present and future as if they're real people and then u have tommy and wilbur hopping on stream like "U guys want lore? LMFAOOOOOO"

[alatusxiaoo]

okay fuck my heart is actually racing right now,, but i did it. im finally fucking done with the fantasy au.

*internally screaming*

it’s coming out today,, fuck.

[messyrxin]

I like to imagine everyone who Dream once cared for going to visit him, ending in one day George visiting him to yell at him, for trying to manipulate him, him, of all people, the one who gave Dream a shoulder to cry on, the one who made Dream laugh the most, his best friend who was there for him when called, his king, his only source of genuine care and just because he didn't go along with his plans, bc he didn't want to get involved in wars and lose everything, lose him, lose themselves, Dream decided he had to get rid of him... having to now face the consequences as George is a sobbing mess at the prison cell, wondering what the hell he did wrong to make his best friend hate him, no reason given, no questions answered

[neuralpathway]

if I have to stand one more time my heels will shatter