#if its the stress then…same girl. same
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Hey so is there any way to get that Homura Rebellion costume that we see in Akumura’s MGS asking for a friend (the friend is me)
#magia record#droppel plays...magia record jp?#i am gonna be really sad if they modeled it just for us not to be able to use it on homescreen ;-;#btw has anyone noticed how akumuras live 2d model looks…tired?#she has some kind of dark circle under her eyes compared to coolmura#if its the stress then…same girl. same
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friend notoriously bad at videogames said shed play marvel rivals with me tomorrow chat if i never post after tomorrow night its because a blood vessel bursted
#marvel rivals#snap chats#AT LEAST WE’LL HAVE OUR OTHER FRIEND THERE BUT god.#she funny as hell she just suddenly called me and was like ‘i saw your twitter. do you wanna play marvel rivals tomorrow’#and then she proceeds to be like ‘wait so who do you main. other than magneto’ Motherfucker with a capital M#NO I SWEAR IM NOT A ONE TRICK i really like wanda hawkeye and jeff….#NO SHE SAID ONE MORE THING SHE WAS LIKE ‘wait are charles and magneto the same guy’ and she tries to Just Kidding her wait outta it#Note whenever she says Just Kidding she’s trying to cover her ass I PROMISE I WAS LIKE /KAYLA. BE SERIOUS./#and then she was like ‘who’s the friendlier one of the two’#and then i had to hit her with the Technically People Think Theyre Both Varying Degrees Of Asshole. however charles probably wont bite you#and THEN SHE WAS LIKE ‘ok well you should draw magneto surprising charles with jollibees’ AND I. NO SHE THINKS MY EXISTENCE SURROUNDS JB#AND THIS GAL HAD THE GAUL TO BE LIKE ‘oh do you know how to make it since its a big part of your culture’#i was flabbergasted frankly. ‘oh you guys really like jollibees so you know how to make it right’ i screamed#LIKE ????ISJAJSJSJSJ i cant stress the anomaly this girl is i wish you all could meet her so you understand me#AND LIKE SURE I LOVE JBS but she only ever mentions puto and jollibees to me like kayla. there is more to PH culture than that sjKakss#its really funny with the ??? shit she says i cant lie#she was all ‘oh is the winter soldier in the game ? you should play him hes cool :) and from jersey :) ok well his actor is but—‘ LIKE DKSKS#‘snap arent you being a little mean’ no trust and believe AND I HAVE WITNESSES#i have stupid amounts of stories with her. like she tried to excuse being dumb by sayin shes a capricorn#we’re literally both capricorns and she was born two days before me I Cannot. Do You Understand Me.#anyways. she said i should stream me playing rivals would anyone care about that#i kinda wanted to …. i think it’d be fun…. plus i miss streaming :(#ok byebye for now my bros almost home and i said id let him play so i could work on comms#i mean thats assuming he wants to play. if not uhhhhhhh#anyways BYE. ill tell yall how the game goes tomorrow night if i dont die of a stroke#again at least our other friend’ll be there so someone can laugh at my pain
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i have never been more stressed watching a Pearl life series season dear god
#i have stuff to say but they’re not??? very positive??? so hiding them behind the spoiler tags#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#mcyt#ok. uh. funny session ig? i dont have that much to comment on after Pearl and Gem povs narrative/character wise#since its pretty much. the same#but like mechanic wise??? i did not expect the wild cards to be so deadly for like these early sessions#there is. so much going on. the Gem pov is still kinda chill so. go girl thats my unbothered queen#uhhh im kinda indifferent on the snails. like yeah theyre just supposed to be a funny dumb gag but god did it make this ep stressful#there is no break they just have to run around constantly. SL Pearl ep vibes where she keeps trying to build her base but the secret task k#keeps getting in her way#Pearl. girl please. i need you to stay alive. girl please#and also Jimmy and Scar. havent gotten to a bamboozlers pov yet but please. dont be out next session#anyway. moonrot 👍
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and you dont know what to do with it
#undescribed#bonk.png#uninhabited planet survive#this more to force myself to do a finish piece n mess around with brushes n blending than anything else art wise#anyway the absolute shock i experienced bc of assuming off of vibes that this was gonna be purely power of friendship n have no romance#outside of characters' offscreen parents who are married n then watching episode 40 is unmatched this is the true reason to know jack shit#going into stuff holy shit literally only a romantic confession n amicable rejection (+two implied crushes) happened but just the fact that#crushes even get brought up n addressed 40 EPISODES IN was a gut punch especially since (eyes title) Theyre Surviving#y'all are stranded on an uninhabited planet n luna (orange hair girl in the pic) almost DIED like two days n learned she has nanomachines i#her dna now yesterday now is not the time to do a pseudo marriage proposal y'all a 14 n stressed for resources 😭😭#I DIDN'T EVEN DRAW THE GUY WHO CONFESSED BTW IF UR NOT FAMILIAR i drew the guy who is implied to also have a crush on luna#bc its really funny to me. survivor's guilt x survivor's guilt. crushing on the girl who disregards her own life the same amount as u#and also u have like basically the same haircut#ive only watched the immediate next episode so it hasnt been brought up bc adam got sick n they gotta explore ruins for medicine n thats#SIGNIFICANTLY more important that (potentially unrequited) crushed but also i do think it would be really funny if it just never gets broug#t up again bc they accidentally blow up the planet or some shit. kaoru's not even in my top 3 (top 3 is luna sharla n chako 👍) idk why i#drew him beyond finding the whole thing funny also related caption is from a meme i have saved its entirely nonseriois to me LMAO#mujin wakusei survive
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Thinking about Nancy's tendency to frequently lie, terribly, and the idea of autistic masking as constant social pressure to lie about yourself. The idea of her conceptualizing interactions with others as a kind of performance with few internal differences between outright lying and being social.
#she just does it without thought#frequently and with apparently little understanding that she's not very good at it#its her go to when she is uncomfortable or stressed#idk if this makes sense#she values honesty above all else and sees honesty in others almost too much#but at the same time has had to learn like so many autistic girls#that socializing involves a great amount of acting to be successful#but she's not exactly been the most successful has she#Barb was her only friend#anyway#Nancy is so autism coded#i love her so mucb#nancy wheeler#autistic nancy wheeler#stranger things#st
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the new girl at one of my favorite bakeries called me pretty this morning and it literally melted all my stress away 🥺
#kai.rambles#i was feeling sad bc my grandma is in the hospital and when i went to visit her they wouldn’t let me pass bc my license is expired#which okay ik that’s my fault but i took my passport with me just in case and the guy straight up told me that it wasn’t a valid form of id#and im like yeah tf it is ITS A PASSPORT and he said no#and while i was waiting for my mom to come down to the lobby an old lady came in and he turned her away for the same thing#and dudeee okay you turn me away fine fuck off but an old ladyyy??? at that age they don’t pay attention to that just let her pass#and then he argued with another woman bc she brought a flower arrangement and it had water so he couldn’t allow it HELLOOO??!?#so i had to leave and went to go get breakfast for my mom at least bc she stayed the night and i was supposed to stay the day#and when i came back to give her the food she told me that the nurse that was with my grandma asked what happened bc she wasn’t expecting#my mom to return and when my mom told her she immediately got so angry bc that same guy#didn’t allow her and a couple other nurses to bring in a cake for one of the residents#who’s birthday is today and they had a full on argument this morning#so it was all in all awful and now my mom has been there for more than 20 hours until later tonight when my aunt goes over :(#anyway this turned into a whole rant im sorry but im so mad bc i know for a FACT that a passport is a valid form of id#and he was just being a fkn dick#but the girl called me pretty and it took some stress off and she really liked my blush#and i liked hers so we had a little makeup 101 exchange and it was so nice at least 🥺#and i have a couple cute asks to answer that have made my day as well so i’ll get to those in a few 🥰
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ive been rewatching bbc sherlock and the amount of gay dust and crust in that shit is so eatable and chewable i NEED TO CHOMP CHOMP NHAC NHAC JOHNLOCK AND THE ENTIRE ROOM OF CODEPENDENCY-BORDERLINE-HOMOEROTIC THAT THEY HAVE
#I NEED TO EAT THEM#is so stressful to me bc is so obvious through the entire show that they were dating and married and kissing and fooling#sherlock is actually a girls name is so INSANE#can never hate mary tho she was such an interesting caracther#everything is so perfect and TERRIBLE at the same time#fuck.god i live this show#was obsessed with it when i was 13 and hasn't got out of the system yet and probably never will#bbc sherlock#johnlock#its 2024 i need to get over sherlock bbc quickly#it's already haunting me
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i just saw the worst take about melinoe that mischaracterized her completely and it pissed me off so bad . exploding that person in my mind
#aaghhhh they called her boring and too prim and proper AND GRGRHTHGRGRRRR#'why does she fret about her herb and mushroom jars' 'she has the weight of a war on her shoulders why is she so calm'#THERE ARE MULTIPLE POINTS IN THE GAME WHERE SHE EXPRESSES HOW STRESSED AND PRESSURED SHE FEELS#MAYBE SHE FEELS PRESSURED TO KEEP UP APPEARANCES AND GIVE HOPE TO PEOPLE BC SO MANY PEOPLE DEPEND ON HER AND SHE DOESNT WANNA DISAPPOINT!#MAYBE SHE GETS NITPICKY ABOUT HER JARS BEING MISPLACED IS BC THATS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS SHE HAS CONTROL OF! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!#'oh why cant they make a girl character that curses and isnt prim and proper' MAYBE IF YOU LOOKED PAST YOUR DUMB INTERPRETATION OF HER PERSO#i need to calm down#more edit#HER BEING NEAT AND TIDY IS ALSO A FOIL TO ZAGREUS WHO WAS MESSY!#GODDD SHUT UPPPP#also they had the worst opinion abt the combat#like sorry you just have bad taste if you dont think hades 2's combat system is even cooler than hades 1#like fuck you its the same but with even more added moves. fuck off
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i fear the 'surely someone's gonna save me' in sunshine baby has an incredible chokehold on me
#this Can't be the energy going into 2025 sighs#sabs speaks#lowkey had like four different meltdowns today over plans being changed and its like. can we be normal#and then my brain had the audacity to be like ur lying.#like girl what the fuck?? in what world are we doing this for fun#and then do u guys know the horror story of like vampire slumbering just have my headphones on genuinely vampire like and out of NOWHERE my#sister is just above me like Hi.#can u fix this dress for me#like in what world do u wake me up like that girl#i fixed the dress but still like. let me live#times like these im considering dropping out truly having that moment over u need to chill out before the stress kills you before the thing#that's supposed to has a chance#if this all seems disconjointed its because it is and is not hope this helps <3#i also want nothing more than to write about my blorbos but i saw people being wrong about them and now im like shit. maybe im wrong about#them#so i cant do it without feeling insane for that reason and for the second reason that i have other obligations#i think it should be illegal for education to give u things to do over the holidays they dont understand how much guilt i will feel not#getting things done and instead feeling horrific and not resting#i also think learning too much about my health has caused me to spiral a lot like the dr's being so chill about it whilst im in debilitatin#pain is not good for me actually. and has triggered the disability grief all over again#having my pmdd and my menstruation at the same time genuinely i felt like female hysteria and im scared for the next one#its a wonder i did Not do It#a little morbid i guess but i have Morbid hormone disorder shrugs#anyways. 2025 be better i hope#so scared to pull my cards for the year#less actually scared and more like. i dont knowww how much i have it in me to be brave anymore#congrats if u made it this far but mostly sorry to my scorpio rising
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Days since last cried in class: 0
#my bilingualism class is fine and good and great and easy whatever until we get to exams in which case it is hell on earth and the most#stressful thing ever and i break down#its not even that i do bad i got a 100 on the last exam and have a 100 in the class but it is just the most stressful experience ever#this time was less bad then before bc i didnt have a girl coughing in my ear and everyone talking DURING THE EXAM but it was still hell#she brought in earplugs and i took a pair of those but jesus christ#i just hate the way she writes them its confusing and shell ask for small details from fucking forever ago#like literally “what does this word mean” in a language i dont fucking speak. ok it was a spanish creole language and that was one of the#examples when we learned abt it but i got my dates mixed up and didnt study that unit and FUCK!!!!!#just supreme talent to make me feel stressed and terrible. and i think she thinks im a stressed test taker now which is not true lol im#great at tests. i only start crying when i dont know the answer lol or feel stupid#which is crazy bc i do good on her tests. just think she has the unconscious talent of writing a test that makes you feel like youre#not doing it right and are going to do horribly as you do incredibly well#or maybe im just crazy#or maybe she needs to stop fucking scheduling her exams the same day as my fucking portuguese exams theres literally 2 of them how did she#go 2 for 2 because it turns my entire morning into a study craze with pockets of exam taking and crying#and once i start im raw all day so i end up crying like 3 times before noon#anyways need to get off tumblr im burning time to cram for my port exam in 2hrs hate you all goodnight
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WE STILL GOT ARCANEEEEE
#ambessa saying mel is safer as their enemy..... OOF we are going to get her side of the story this season#one thing i dont like is that they are really hauling ass in the first episode like damn. cait and vi are too quickly on the way to raid imo#i cannot velieve my fucking eyes..... vi dropping her gauntlets to keep kissing akdhaksjsk and OF COURSE cait is the one to do it OF COURSE!#were is thay gif of the butch watching football and raising her fist bc they scored that is me right now aldjsksnsl#vi saying please dont change bc she is seeing the signs is so AJDHAKSJK the break up will end lives..... i see why vi becomes an alcoholic#salo and cait wlw mlm hostility for reals#ambessa seeing cait as a rival the second she does her job and uses her military power.... yeah bc she has a real goal not just power grab#jayce fucking up vi and cait by messing with the arcane omg they are IN DANGER!!! JAYCE STOP FUCKING UUUP!!!!#OH MY GOD CAITLYN!!!!! HITTING VI ENOUGH FOR HER TO CRY OH MY GOOOOOD!!!#THERE IS JUST SO MUCH AKDJSKSKAL THE CHILD!!!! JINX GOT A NEW SISTER NOW VI GOODBYE#also vi wasnt going to kill her and jinx told the child to stop.... the only person there willing was cait and look at her.....#also sevika vs cait.... oof.... and jinx fighting vi BARE FISTED!!! GIRL!!!!#what can i fucking say like god.... “is her blood through your veins” “i thought you were different”#jinx is right i hope they got to you know before all of this akdjaksjsk.... christ#also amazing how vi told cait to don't change and she did it 10 minutes later.... girl you are in for it...#i think they just dont understand each other yet but they are in such a situation that they keep changing every 2 minutes so they never do#does that make sense loke ofc cait changed when her mother died and vi did too bc she accepted that her sister was gone#so in a way cait changed and vi stayed the same.... cait liked her “change” but vi did not like cait#ambessa bringing caitlyn to.be a general oh my gooooood her stress is going to get thru the roof like she doesn't have enough to deal with#its bc she knows she can control her... of course she offered her army to her.... and she doesn't mind putting her in danger#AND SHE DID ORCHESTRATE THE ATTACK!!!! OOOF#MEL PLEASEEEE TALK TO CAITLYN PLEASEEEE#like of course she disappears RIGHT NOW!!!#my god... also vis drinking buddy has left too.... of course.... you're good man....#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2
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loveee when a character is crushed under the weight of someone elses expectations for them love when a character dedicates their entire life to something they never even wanted for themself love when the only reason a character keeps going is because theyre Supposed to and bc theyre supposed to make another person happy/proud. YES !!! CLAPPING !!! YES !!!!!!!!
#this isnt rly related to any character in particular i just thought abt this and it made me scream.#flirting at a bar Damn girl you look like youre trapped in a life you built to please someone else. and then i kneel down and pull out a 💍#sry i ran out of space for the full word ring. also why when i type 💍 Ohh theyre hiding it. bc now the emoji is 💍 Oh they changed it again#pox on their home..originally it was 🔐 sughested emoji#but then the second time it was 😭.... very anti marriage. well ig maybe the sob could be like OMG... YES!!!!! I WILL MARRY YOU!!!!!!#ngl getting proposed to is such a big fear of mine like. i dont think id ever be able to propose to someone so id have to be proposed to i#suppose but it makes me quite nervous not bc im like ohh nooo dont propose i just rly worry ill react the wrong way and theyll change their#mind. like its a very high emotion moment so ik i would be supposed to be emotional And i would be but idk if id do it in the right way . y#idk. what if my autism looms and i end up just being like 😐 on accident. fuckkk. what if i say somethinf dumb. like i try to be like YES !#but instead im like YEP! god. can you imagine. id have to just bury myself at that point. so embarassing. or like what if i get excited and#flap my hands but it was supposed to be more of a like. joyful crying type of thing... or what if im supposed to just be shocked and like .#Oh my god ....#and am I supposed to run at them and sweep them into a hug or do they do thst to me. UGH. ITS SO STRESSFUL. i suppose ill just remain alone#forever so I never have to confront any difficult situations ever again . Joke .#idk it just makes me nervous. but i suppose hopefully the person proposing to me will love me . that would be nice so hopefully they wont#mind if i dont respond the right way . and they wont be upset with me bc they love me eversomuch. a girl can dream i suppose... my head lik#is pounding sry. i need to sleep probably.. stayed up too late again -_- 8am -_- and im sposed to do laundry today But i dont want to . and#since im gonna fall asleep i fear it shant happen. UGHHH#wtvr. idk what my ideal proposal would be likeee. i don't want to be blindsided ig#i like surprises but Obviously im too worried abt like. my immediate reaction#+ i think its important to talk abt marriage Before proposing just so everybodys like#on the same page and such. Obvs... but ya. i dont think id want a super public proposal like. id like it to be somewhere nice with maybs#significance to our relationship and such. and its fine if theres like Some passersby but id hate for it 2 be like. somewhere crowded. or i#a restaurant or something#Altho if it was in a restaurant maybe we could get free food..#but maybe that can be just fake proposals later on. and our real proposal can be somewhere else. YIPPEEE. me and my imaginary future spouse#who is To be honest rather bare minimum#normal girl will be like Wistful sigh maybe my future spouse will even love me and wont scream at me and will like to listen to me speak 😍#but anywyas. my beddybye time. SURPRISE GN POST#woahhthis got off topic i forgot what the original post was this always happens. i do love characters like that
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WHO THE HECK put my life on hard mode all of a sudden??
#im so stressed i hate school so much#i have an english draft to write by tmr and i pulled an all night yesterday for it but im wayyyy over the word count and no matter what i#do it just WONT shorten!!!#and in maths im falling behind so bad because whenever i try to do my work#this girl next to me keeps talking abt dumb bs and asking annoying questions like IM NOT THE TEACHER LEAVE ME ALONE#i need to revise for maths and science bc i have an exam NEXT WEEK#and i also have to do my languages speech whichbis being assessed by the end of this week AND revise for the languages writing test#while at the same time i have to make a powerpoint presentation for my hpe theory work (i didnt chose hpe its compolsory :(((()#the only subject not killing me rn is my business class bc i finished the exam yesterday but im pretty sure we have to prepare for this#career expo we're doing soon so AGHHH#im dying pls help
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it was a small passing comment in the story but when its mentioned Sheila saw her dog get beaten to death when she was a kid and it made her feel like humankind was just like that (+ her sister's murder afterwards cementing that worldview)... augh.
#fugo.txt#like. idk i feel like im repeating myself but i cant stress this shit enough man. she was just a little girl#she was like 10#damn.#and like by that point she had already very much gone thru a lot of death. her parents were gone and the only family she had was her sister#and the only friend she had was her dog.#and then they both died. and she saw them die. right after the other. and then she was completely alone#idk looking at it thru that lense its not surprising at all that she decided to do all that. she was grieving and she didn't have anyone-#-to guide her in that. and the only logical progression she could fathom is that whoever killed her sister should suffer the same.#and deep down she knows she's doing this for herself because she doesn't KNOW what else to do. and she feels guilty. what would clara even-#think of her? and even if she's all oh illuso is dead and he suffered. so she can rest easy. you can SEE she never got any closure at all.#thats why she froze up when fighting against kocaqi. his sister also died right in front of him. but he did what she couldnt do#he gave her peace of mind. he gave her a dignified death. she died happy. clara didnt. and sheila can NEVER give that to her#all she can do is posthumously give her peace by murdering her murderer. but would Clara want that?#ugh man. its 2:30 am i should be sleeping i have a class to retake at 11:50#but. man..#please take the time to think of her tjis december
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th-them... <3<3<3!!!
(naomi is not licking her!!! shes sticking her tounge out, i was just too lazy to fix it; she´s not a gross germ gremlin; just a brat lmao)
#okayy; count this as a de stress doodle i should absolutely left for later#ya girl is still taking abyssmal descitions after yesterday´s incident </3#anyways; thinking abt them <3 the siblings ever <3#false prophecy child; kid who spent about 8 years straignt alone trying not to die; and chaos gremlin#that is an incredible over simplification of their lives lmao#all 3 are related but its funky; nao and akira are literal blood siblings but havent seen each other in years; nao barely remembers him :(#meanwhile nyx goes into the picture bc their dad picked her up after she ended up in egarim (mirror dimension)#oh theres so much to unpack here abt their designs but ill leave that for another day#unless im asked? 👀please ask me abt my ocs 👀#<- that is a trap; i will not shut up if anyone gives me a reason to start#my art#my ocs#naomi#akira#nyx#huh this doesnt even belong to a specific story#epilogue#i guess...#oh also forgot to mention nyx is related to them bc she´s from the past and comes from the same clan as their mom :>
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...
#me @ my youngest sister at 6.30 this morning: yooooooo can u draw me a fishy so i can get it tattooed on me?#i drew her some flowers so i want a paralell tattoo with her initials bc she has my initials on her#but i literally have not spoken to her since like may bc i do not talk to my sisters unless we r in the same room. no hate we just dont hav#a lot in common. it makes me a lil sad tho bc im curious abt them. my youngest sister is at least nice to me 😭#ive been thinking abt asking her for ages and last night i was asked abt my sisters so i was like. the time is now#while im still a bit elevated#which has been to my advantage bc i was able to stay v chatty and energetic while talking to ppl. and i think i made some friends#we bonded over fic reading. so theyre a bit. ya kno. girls gays and theys of science#we make the world go round. but its so interesting to hear them talk abt coming to school here bc they both liked where they were and r#leaving their support systems. and im like bruh if i didn't leave the southwest i was gonna die. im so happy to b here#support system? whats that. i talk to my parents once a month and that's it lol. but im gonna try to establish one here#and try to actually make actual friends. this school is way better abt making grad students interact#my last school was not at all like that. but anyway i had fun#and i mean im only at the start of the semester. and im in a good mood. and i kno things will get stressful#but im just really happy i got accepted here#and the longer im here the more clearly i can see how much i was suffering#the funny thing is tho that i wrote this last night and only hours later i was squirming in frustration bc the fact that im back in therapy#means i feel a greater obligation to not b actively self destructive. evil coping mechanisms my beloved#this is y my mum wanted me back in therapy bc im a goodie 2 shoes and when my counselor is like: did u do X the next time i see her. ill b#honest and itll b annoying >:-[ ugh#its just hard for me to b around ppl a lot bc i get stuck in mental loops bc ocd. which is exhausting. and i want it to stop#and i want to do bad things to make it stop but i wont bc im trying to b better#its just funny to me that ill go from everythings awful to everythings great i shoukd talk to my sisters and make friends and do this and#this and this. to oh god i cant do this anymore in such short time frames with certainty that how im feeling is how ive always felt#ive also noticed that my peaks of high energy do come before stressful events. which does make me worry for future stressful events. like#defending. i mean ive never gone fully off the tracks but its a lil alarming when it feels like the train is going at a million miles an hr#unrelated#meanwhile my other sister is apparently in Colorado but when i saw the pics is was like: YOU BITCH#R U CLOSE TO ME RN??? but no. Colorado is far away
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