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massiveladycat · 2 months ago
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im breaking my silence hes ugly asf on the inside and the outside goodnight
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corviiids · 2 months ago
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ok but . . . . . . . Could YOU be kira and win?!
based on how light formulated kira, it's impossible for kira to win. kira's 'new world' has no win condition - light never cleanly defines what criteria he would need to satisfy, so the new world is inherently aspirational, because deep down, light doesn't want to win at all, he just wants to play.
social reform via mass murder, especially in the way kira formulates it but really in any way, is also not only (obviously!!!) deeply, deeply unethical, it's also just fundamentally impossible for myriad reasons. again, kira can't win.
if you found the death note in real life, i would heavily advise against using it. i personally would not use it. aside from, again, the obvious ethical ramifications, it's just too fucking risky!!! the parameters of how the note functions, the potential consequences, the rules, the terms of the 'contract' you'd enter into by using it - all of these are unclear, even if you knew about death note the series. furthermore, even if you had access to the rules, which you don't, the rules explicitly state that the shinigami don't have to explain everything to you. not even the shinigami can access all the rules (only the shinigami king). and based on the a-kira short story, the rules can change and apply retroactively at any time. even if you didn't know all that, by choosing to use it, you would be submitting yourself to all sorts of unknown supernatural and non-supernatural risks. it's just not a smart thing to do. leave that shit Alone
kira is a hubris trap. the death note is designed to appeal to all the most unstable parts of a person's psyche. it's especially good at targeting one particular vulnerability in humanity, which is that people are generally much worse at considering how they would react in a hypothetical scenario than they think they are. anyone who thinks they could succeed in using the death note, even with a better formulated plan than light yagami, is falling victim to that trap.
yes
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starwikia · 9 months ago
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suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post.#before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly#again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but.#he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin.#its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it#its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people#we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves#so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit#like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it?#yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice.#this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi#gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism#its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt#if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions.#hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him#like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me.#its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it.#for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong#oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this.#james somerton#idk might delete this later its just. ugh...
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harvestmoth · 5 months ago
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what do we think about pet store workers team xen
#for the pet thing i had a bit ago#neved doesnt work with them hes just a delivery driver for some of their supplies. he mostly helps out with his wifes orphanage#idk if clear kieran and eden are around too or not though im not thinking that hard about it#jenner used to work there too but he quit and works for something at home#hes like a stay at home dad now or something#cassandra is either part of corporate or shes just the evil mayor of gdc still and has no affiliation to them idk#she still has something going on with madelis no matter what though#eli and sharon work part time and ren is like the guy who gets them coffee or something. runs delivery too maybe#regina comes in sometimes too to flirt with nastasia when she can but thats like a side thing and completely unrelated#btw zepto is like a clay figure zetta made and is either alive or just a figure. you decide#sorry i was trying to think of something rejuv related to draw and ended up thinking a little too hard about the pet thing. my bad#pokemon rejuvenation#if you have no idea what im talking about with the pet thing its just rejuv but they have weird looking pets instead of pokemon#and i guess technically a modern au. whatever. melia still has the power of god and anime in her. dont worry about it#zetta isnt a clone though hes just a guy. idk where he comes from but hes jenners son and melias older brother#im not drawing madame x im sorry. but know she really does show up to her store wearing all that and never takes it off. + the uniform#oh and nastasia still just straight up has deoxys. dw about it
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littleseasalt · 1 year ago
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"forever is a bad dad to richa-" SHUT UP!!!!!
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#qsmp#qsmp forever#qsmp richarlyson#id also add in the book he wrote for the egg museum where he talked again about forever being the one who took care of him the most#but i dont have the patience to find it in vods to screenshot it#also sorry but. some people on twitter have been stressing me out A LOT over their opinions on their relationship#ive literally been stressing about it since i woke up i needed to release this stress somehow#< also im thinking of doing a long post talk about what their relationship is and isnt#bc whenever theres angst/fight between them people take it as an opportunity to mischaracterize BOTH forever and richas#in a way that makes it clear that the person 1. doesnt keep up with forevers pov#and 2. only knows richas through one pov#like. ok#disagree with forever however you want youre free to do that#i myself think he was in the wrong in multiple situations (like the tallulah fight day)#BUT SURPRISE!! SAYING HES A BAD DAD IS LITERALLY SO WRONG!!#PEOPLE CAN MESS UP!! PEOPLE CAN MAKE MISTAKE!! NO ONE IS A PERFECT PARENT!!#NO ONE ALREADY KNOWS HOW TO BE THE PERFECT DAD AND THERES NO SUCH THING AS BEING A PERFECT DAD!!#PARENTHOOD IS SOMETHING YOU LEARN ALONG THE WAY!!!#AND LEARNING HOW TO BE A DAD IS A CORE TRAIT OF FOREVERS CHARACTER SINCE DAY ONE!!!!!!!#saying hes a bad dad literally goes against canon statements from richas#saying richas is uncomfortable with forever goes against canon#“oh but i mean in the emotional way” ok so you never watched a forever stream before#because when they fight. richas ALWAYS opens up to forever later on how he felt#the fights HAPPEN because richas is comfortable making drama in front of forever#if richas' didnt feel comfortable he would literally just “suck up” his jealously and not show it often but he does shows it often#if richas was uncomfortable after fights he would just apologize and never talk about his feelings#but after the tallulah fight? he told forever about how romero richas affects his body and how he feels#after the armor fight? he told forever about how he felt towards his own life#to which btw BOTH of these times where he opened up#he had never talked about that with anyone before
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xoxo-ren-xoxo · 9 months ago
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really weird thing ive noticed lately re: hermits getting critiqued for stuff theyve said or done is that as soon as someone holds a shit opinion (even if it's just them being stupid, or a centrist, or saying a bad word without knowing what it means, or whatever) people immediately seem to flock to the 'this guy should die' 'kys' 'why are we giving this person a platform' rhetoric and like. that's not how meaningful change is made?
like, yeah, if one of my beloved CCs posted a tweet or video tomorrow about how much they hate gay people, or believe in conservative ideals, or they just said a bunch of slurs or whatever (these are hyperbolic examples obviously) then yeah, fuck them, they should go rot. but like, having some dumb takes, or saying bad things in the past, doesn't = evil terrible person...
idk, i feel like we can critique content creators without getting so insane about it. like, shit, there are things some of my favourites do that i don't like, but theyre not even really worth bringing up tbh. unless its something actually important, i feel like it just creates more drama out of nothing and all these assholes come crawling out of the woodwork to tell everyone how much they hate that creator. or find their content boring anyway so clearly they have no real merit to anyone.
more of an explanation of what i mean in the tags but yeah.
#this is kind of about ppl finding out x is a centrist and... apparently that means telling him 'kys' is ok#i dont even like centrism but like... wasnt he super right wing at one point? is this not at least a mild improvement? he's just some guy#i like his content. dont care enough to get into drama about him being a 'we should all just talk it out!' kinda guy. who give a shit.#this is also kinda about doc's little rant on twt about plestine/isral (spelling to not clog tags) which was basically just -#- 'stop asking me to speak on these things 1. i could get into legal trouble 2. i stopped talking about politics years ago for good reasons#which like. isnt my favourite response to things? but i also Get It yknow?#it wasnt as big of a deal as ppl seemed to think it was#(especially since he very clearly retweeted donation post and said hes against innocent ppl dying. which is pretty clear to me.)#anyway the milder things im talking about here is like. harry potter references or mild orientalism re: 'asian-style' builds#like. i could go mad about that but i really dont give a shit#i dont#and like im a hard leftist. but i just do not care. so long as they arent a massive right winger or a creep im fine#*i say massive right winger but tbh i kind of mean right winger at all. i just dont give a shit about ccs wanting to remain more centrist#especially online.#anyway#hermitblr#hermitcraft#mcyt#discourse#ben chats shit on the internet#to clarify im not tryna say that its cool to play both sides politically but also i dont think bringing up a 4 year old post -#- to stir up drama is very genuine. looking at the notes i just see a lot of 'wow fuck this guy i hate his content anyway' and its like. ok
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1am-s0-veryt1red · 2 days ago
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"nothingburger ship" man who give a fuck let people ship who they want
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outsideyourhousewithaknife · 2 months ago
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You HAVE to love the moment after your phone dies and you are left hunched over the screen, your eyes deprived of the blue light to which they have grown accustomed, your mind deprived of the distraction from the horrors of your reality, to behold your own image (reverse Narcissus) in all its double-chinned, acne-scarred, chocolate-stained and cheeto-dusted glory, and horrified by who you have become, and you are full of guilt and (remorse) exhaustion, and you are (entirely, devastatingly) alone, and you blink, and you get up, and you (cry) (look in the mirror?) go plug in your phone and get some more cheetos
No, really, you have to love it. It's the law.
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ganondoodle · 2 years ago
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been able to keep both my fear and hype about totk in check by watching nothing but elden ring videos for weeks but now i read something on accident and my anxiety is going through the roof again
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butch-bakugo · 2 months ago
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You know what? Controversial opinion: expecting every single post that talks about not being attracted to men, hating men or otherwise talking about lesbianism/bisapphism/feminism to explicitly state somewhere that it's trans inclusive or they mean cis men when they are talking about men and not trans women is an entitled and lesbophobic/mysognistic expectation.
I said men. I mean men. Not trans women or else we would of fucking said trans women. The fact your first assumption on a post about lesbianism and not being attracted to men is to assume the op is terfy/transmysognistic is just a quieter and more entitled form of the lesbophobic shit that is "all lesbians are terfs and all terfs are lesbians" bullshit. Assuming lesbianism and feminism are inherently transmysognistic or have the inherent possibility of being transmysognistic is more of a self report and straight up mysogny than any actual potential bigotry on lesbian's and feminist's part. I'm not even a lesbian, I'm a bi manwoman and even I fucking know that.
Use some context clues or admit your mysognistic and expect women to constantly add a million disclaimers to their feminism that doesn't need to be there so you can defang it and middle the point with shit that's obvious and doesn't need to be stated. If you don't see any (ACTUAL) terf dog whistles or the op is LITTERALLY FUCKING TRANS, INCLUDING TRANSMASC, immediately assuming all sapphicness has a chance of being "terfy" is mysognistic and lesbophobic. It's a bigoted assumption.
Many would argue racism in the gay man community is SIGNIFICANTLY more common yet y'all do not expect every post about liking men, fighting toxic masculinity or not being attracted to women as a man to add a little disclaimer at the bottom that hes cool with poc. You only expect that of cis women and afab trans people. That's mysognistic and transandrophobic. They dont need anymore work. Let them talk about feminism without expecting a scrolling disclaimer at the bottom to comfort your weird guilt and pick me bullshit that she doesn't hate alllll men and she knows good ones are out there and she just means cis men not transmascs or transfems or any trans people and she's a girls girl. Bruh.
Leave her tf alone and let her say men. Let her pick the bear. Engage with feminism outside of Tumblr and terfs I'm FUCKING BEGGING YOUUUUUUU YOU THINK VAUINA ART IS A DOG WHISTLE YOU'VE LOST THE FUCKIN PLOT, MY GUY
- a transfem AND Transmasc intersex person. Fuck off with the allegations.
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frobby · 5 months ago
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i think the people complaining about wonderful precure not having combat are kinda funny cuz ive literally only seen futari wa and wonderful and im currently watching wonderful precure and futari wa max heart at the same time and enjoying both of them
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sonknuxadow · 5 months ago
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ive joked about it before but man i really am the only person on earth who remembers the gun commander is a character that exists arent i . because the other day when the shadow panel was happening and the voice actors were talking about their characters and how they were eachothers only friend and maria was completely isolated from other people i was like What about the gun commander . and i havent seen anyone else point the contradiction out . lmao
#okay well i cant find a video of the full panel so i cant recheck that they said those things but i swear they did i remember hearing it#for people who never played shadow the hedgehog and dont know what im talking about#its shown that one of the guys whos currently in charge at gun lived on the ark as a kid and was close friends with maria#but he hated shadow because he witnessed his creation and it scared him and he always blamed him for marias death#and its NOT one of those extremely minor details only hardcore fans would notice either . its shown in the main story#to be clear i dont even care about the gun commander as a character. hes one of the sonic characters i care about the least#i just cant help but notice people always forget about him when talking about stuff related to the ark#(like saying that maria didnt have any friends aside from shadow or that her and shadow were the only kids who lived there around that time#or that shadow was the only person who lived on the ark thats still alive)#i mean hes one of those things that wasnt in sa2/sonic x and was added in later so i guess its fair a lot of people forget. but lmao#now im wondering if sega forgot he existed or if the current voice actors just didnt know he existed in the first place#i think the second option is probably more likely because from the way they talked#it seemed like they dont really know muhc about the sonic lore aside from what theyre told about for upcoming projects#so maybe the gun commander just isnt relevant right now so they werent told about him?
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im14andivebeen14foramonth · 1 month ago
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ha ha ha. the way my feelings started to grow for my best friend right before I found out he's moving states and states away over the summer. ha ha ha. so pony and johnny core hahhaha
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blighted-lights · 8 months ago
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I feel like your approach to criticizing a certain fandom was the wrong way of doing it. Don't get me wrong, you are a hundred percent right about the lack of representation for certain characters. But you had to have known that you would've gotten backlash for insinuating that the only reason that content is being made is because people are... misogynistic? The characters are well-written; that's why they get attention. The women are also well-written, you're right! But instead of getting mad at the people who enjoy specific characters, you could contribute to what you want to see in the fandom. Make fanfiction, make art, talk about your favorite ships, talk about your favorite characters, talk about the head-canons you have for them, connect with other fans of those characters, make AUs with them, make the fandom you want to see! But I don't know what you were expecting when you come out and say in the tags "you must be misogynists for liking these characters and you must be awful people for playing around with AUs" even though every fandom on this website does that. That was hostile and was only going to get a hostile response in return especially when you specifically put it in the tags for fans of those characters to see. Because it reads as you insinuating that fans of these characters existing is why you don't get any representation of your favorite characters. Or, alternatively, that everyone only likes certain characters because they're misogynists who hate women characters. People make content of them because they like them and because they want to make content of them.
Want more content of the things you want to see? Pay or support the artists and writers who make that content or start making it yourself. Its not helpful to complain that some characters get more attention than others but then make no attempt to contribute to it in any meaningful way. You cannot just get mad at people for liking characters and expect the fandom to magically decide its going to give you the content you want.
This is a long-winded way of saying you are correct in that the fandom seems to hyper-focus on some characters over others. But the way you approached that discussion was combative, hostile, and unhelpful, and you're not going to motivate a community into making content by being passive-aggressive to the people making the content they want to make. Be the change you want to see in the fandom, or support the artists and writers who make the content you want to see.
Its like... You can't complain your garden isn't growing if you're not watering it and not adding seeds, and instead are blaming everyone else for having plants in their gardens that you don't like.
anon i dont know how to tell you this but if you felt the need to write a five-paragraph essay talking about how i need to be nicer to other people when i am pointing out misogyny in a fandom space then, well... actually, i dont know what to tell you other than the fact that i was trying to be aggressive and im not going to be civil about misogyny. my post wasn't made in the hopes of getting people to make more content of the women in borderlands because that would never in ten fucking million years work. it was not a constructive post. you are assuming i have some sort of goodwill about this and i don't. i wanted to be an asshole because, surprise, i am an asshole. funny how that works.
you are also pulling so much of this out of nowhere and putting so many words in my mouth that i dont even know where to begin with it?? i mean this in the kindest way possible nonnie but. this is a wild response to make when all i said was essentially "wow it sure is weird that the majority of content made for bl is focused on only three men when there's a full cast of amazing women to look at" and then "its also weird that people are making aus to erase the canon abuse and exploitation of a CHILD in order to make jack a good father". but thanks for the essay, nonnie. i guess.
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seilon · 1 year ago
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every newer gen kpoppy who calls it revolutionary every time a big name bg member wears something vaguely skirt-like should be required to watch lee sungjong of infinite putting his whole pussy into performing coming of age ceremony by park jiyoon wearing the song's classic form-fitting black side-slitted dress with zero gimmicks way back in 2012
#its Required Material re: historical kpop genderfuckery#no but im 100% for real. this was in the middle of the era where bg members doing gg songs in drag and whatnot was a really#common gag at concerts and in variety shows and whatnot- especially using bg members who were/are considered the most effeminate#basically it was a big Joke and never taken seriously. alot of the time the dances would be exaggerated and whatnot and yeah they#werent like. REAL covers. werent usually respectful of the original gg/female idol's work and all that. haha man in dress type humor#i know if you're old enough to be following me and into kpop you probably know this already and im talking into space but whatever#anyway. sungjong said fuck that and fucking killed it with a genuine live cover (dance And vocals) of coming of age ceremony#which- as you can imagine based on the title- isnt just an iconic female idol song but one that's blatantly about female sexuality#and whatnot. wore the dress that's in the original mv (or something very similar) and didnt play it up with a wig or anything like that#(like what's usually the case when male idols cover gg songs to make it more clear that its a Costume and they are Crossdressing rather tha#just. being a guy and wearing a dress.)#did not shy away from the sexiness of the dance AT ALL to the point of riding the floor at one point more or less which. god fucking damn#but anyway. it's totally true to the original and is unapologetically sexy in an inherently orientation-fucking gender-fucking way and GOD#wish it got more attention than it did because THAT is revolutionary. thats the first performance i ever saw where a male idol did a#female idol song in the original female idol outfit live without any gimmick or even the implication that it COUNTS as drag. its SUCH a#big deal imo. and it helps that its really fucking hot but thats neither here nor there. anyway. i know its been years but i still have so#many feelings and opinions about sungjong's coming of age ceremony performance ghfgjhdgfdh WATCH IT#sungjong#infinite#kibumblabs
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bunnyboy-juice · 27 days ago
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honestly. being able to be honest with my loved ones about when i am Mentally Unwell but also Dont Want To Talk About It has done wonders for my mental health
#its nice just being able to tell people “im not okay! please dont focus too much on me tho!” and have them respect it#instead of doing things that will trigger me bc they are uncomfortable w the fact that im not okay#i deeply appreciate others sitting in their discomfort/holding the discomfort with me instead of comforting me#and like i get that ppl who offer space or time or comforts are trying to care for me but tbh its not welcome most of the time#bc when I'm upset often times it triggers deep emotional pain that only i can really manage by taking time to sit and calm down and Feel#(bc if not it becomes a flashback instead of Feelings from being Triggered) and having my attention diverted is actually distressing for me#bc i have to be grounded in very specific ways also that i just dont usually have the energy to explain bc like... i know how to do it?#and like also. i can just be Not okay. it doesnt have to be a Thing for me to acknowledge it#iderk what the point of this tag ramble is#im just like. really glad ive found people who understand that im not Avoidant just bc i have different needs bc of how my nervous system i#also if its not clear: please do not offer comforts for this. i am handling my own feelings and issues i just kinda wanna talk about it#also reminding myself its okay to not want to be comforted and that doesnt mean im Wrong or Bad or Resistant or Harming myself#(also ngl having a therapist who understands that certain coping skills may never go away but can be modified to be more useful is LIFE#CHANGING. DO YOU KNOW HOW FREEING IT WAS TO HEAR SOMEONE WHO ISNT CRAZY SAY “i can see how [these things] can be distressing and if you wan#to stop doing them we can explore new coping skills - AND if the distress from these coping skills is shame related we can work through it#and see what happens and its okay if you come out the other side using the same coping skills with a better understanding of yourself “#when most of my life every coping skill ive ever engaged in has been moralized (esp by therapists) and attempted to be beaten out of me.)#also I'm saying “comfort me” thru this bc even tho it's not actually comforting TO me when ppl do this ik thats usually their intent
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