#if i make a fool of myself who cares!!!
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LIV!! Im so proud of you and super excited for you about your acting classes! I really hope you have a blast with them, I know you’re gonna be absolutely amazing!! 🫶🫶🫶
JOCELYN!!! this is so sweet, thank you so much!!! i just keep getting more and more excited!!! i think it's gonna be a lot of fun, the coach seems really cool and i'm so ready to give it a go!!! i can't wait to update you after!!!
#im going in with an open mind and a willingness to do basically anything#i'm rlly over being nervous about being embarrassed or vulnerable i just don't care anymore u know!!!#if i make a fool of myself who cares!!!#i paid for the class and i'm gonna get my money's worth!!!#and i think that'll make it even better :)#I'LL POST ABT IT AFTER I GO I PROMISE!!! :)#ask liv#jocelynships#jocelyn tag#sweetness
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i am in pain i am tired of everything and most of all i am tired of being nice and just want to go apeshit
#🦔#im mad bc of several reasons but mostly bc of. whatever. the way everything tires me out so quickly. how i can only do so many things a day#bc i can deal with the noise and huge crowds and seeing people less and less and its EXHAUSTING#at home i kept saying i was stuck in my flesh enclosure - which is true!!!! - and getting away from home did help and it IS helping but.#you cant escape every bad day just by being away. and right now the hurting feels even worse bc i feel even weaker than usual#oke thing i did not anticipate is that people who ski are you know Very into exercising and training and i am Not. and it makes me feel so#distant from other people. and whenever i talk to someone who says stuff like 'but you're 24!!! youre so young how come you tell me youre#tired??????“ bc my head hurts my body is weakened from years and years of depression and i just dojt know man#god and once im back home ill have to deal with work stuff and irl stuff and take care of my mom again and do everything and im tired im so#tired bro#anyway. sorry for the word vomit idk why i fooled myself into thinking chronic depression wouldnt follow me here
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Not sure if tumblr is the least embarrassing social media to essentially be talking to one’s self or the most 🤔
#I go back and forth on this one lol#I feel like Instagram stories are the least embarrassing because Insta notifications are somehow less noticeable and often don’t work lol#Like yeah I can see who’s seen it if I care to look but I don’t#but like getting crickets on tumblr? The social media for outcasts and weirdos? EXCRUCIATING#Like I just live in a constant state of embarrassment these days because I’m making a fool of myself publicly over and over and over but…#I keep posting lol maybe I should just stop using the tags so I don’t bother other ppl?#My biggest fear is being annoying 😅#(I’m being dramatic because it’s nearly dinner time and I haven’t eaten in a few hours :P)#stuff and nonsense#anyway this is why I keep making new blogs lmao
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google: how does one tell people I don't celebrate without pretending to be jewish or a johovas witness?
#people assume i'm jewish and ask me my hanukkah plans#like people have spent their whole lifes watch hundreds of movies hey look we cure the grumpy anti-spirit of Christmas man#and i wasn't raised relgious so it doesn't bug me to not cuz I only ever did the secular-ish version anyways#Every year all my friend forget and try to fix me and tell me I just need to make new memories are tell me I'm evil or something#we are adults you should be able to respect that I'm happier this way even if you don't understand#i just never vibed with christmas#it feels like everyone is a sleeper agent even jewish friends#i do new years#and like april fools day#and halloween#it shouldn't be that big a deal#but like it really triggers people#and they assume the worst about my parents which is so untrue#this year might go no contact with the first person who threatens me in response to my car rules#no Christmas music no weeb music no feet on the dash#i am not anti-christmas you can have your fun and I give gifts to friends#i just don't have a tree#or do antything special#and i don't want to go to your parent#i could fly to my parents#i'm not that broke#i'm just happier have a free wednesday to myself#yes i have christmas traumatic events but i felt this way before then#no body would care or notice if I didn't do easter#i know becuase i don't do easter unless it lines up with a vacation and I can see my parents#advice#holidays#christmas#the answer is lying isn't it i don't want to lie#i don't celibrate a religous holiday this time of year shouldn't be that hard
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non paralive moots im begging yuo listen to my wife singing
#i was behind the camera nd i never blinked once lookinf at him i will jeffthge killer style burnoff my eyelids so th better i can lookathimw#i need to put My oil in his pores#i woudl fry my food w his face oil i'll let him feed me cockroaches and set me on fire like the one vid of the guy w the cockroach as long#s i get to set him on fire back i hope they project this on time square toe curlinf music tha t makes me gag if i was a vampire and he was#n his period. strawberry jam im in the background of all the shots just watching him itmust be crazy goinf from ibuki imperialism#sitch to kenta character focus all rise for the anthem of every country ever united under one stupid greenfHIS EXTRA VERSE IS PLAYOING OAOO#kenta shimeji that deletes all my shit and only plays his songs#gonna recite thi slike a mantra to myself rock myself back and forth in a corner if i get out of a parakive concert itll look like attempte#murder but i did it all myself in will be the guardian angel to everyone who worked on this everything after gokuluck is opposite of peak#poo. opposite of peak is poodoodoo. imagine having to ppost yer music after peakuluck kenta solved all my problems ever I LOVE WHEN YOU#CAN HEAR KENTAS SNARKY SMILE his little Alrights and okays and buu!If the sneezing when someones talking ab you myth was true#he would be sneezy bc of me HANDSOME HIII HANDSOME how am i gonna talk to non paralive moots what do i even say Hello! How ar e you!#i cant do that anymore im the surprise man from freak month are you sure its alright are you sure UUGUHHHH THE LITTLE wikaioaiugh at beginn#ng i love music thanks for inventing music guys thanks for inventing handsome Lockjaw Parvo Tetnis Botfly kenta tetnis eerm i thought yousa#tetris ☝️‼️‼️‼️ EVERYONE SHUT UP HES SPEAKING. LISTEN LISTENthe world will be like that one scen e in the one movie where they all stop tal#EXTRA VERSE CUTIEBEAR I LOV E YOU YOU SOUND SO PRETTYYY WE FINALLY GOT PRETTY SOUNDING KENTA AWROOO BOW WOW !!!!!! ing when he heads upstai#and just look at him when claudio went how cute how fun how SWEET and also when claudio went i spit in it my saliva is now inside all of th#se peoples bodies thats me when kenta leaves his energy drinks unattended but dw itll add extra fizz Hi ryog A the only way to describe how#i feel about kenta is like claudio gregory shawn mendes you cast a Spell on me Spell on me! STILL ALIVE okau HES SO CUUUTE kenta i will hel#you dispose of every other groups bodies okau man i gotta draw salkenta after this day 1 of scarface I already feel my beast form taking p#HIIIIE KENTA RIDE ON RIDE ON INDEED WAUAUUAA WAUUAUAUUAUA WAUAUAUAUAU kachi toru made lets be like UTV and the archiver babydoll my face is#n fire and SOOOO ARE YOUUUU KENTA COVER OF EVERYTHING FOR APRIL FOOLS CROSSING MY FINGERSS NO POINT IN ACTIN LIKE I DONT LIKE HIM I FOOOOLD#IM YOURS cozmez long forgotten they can be locked in the dome forever for all i care salkenta time im going to sweep kenta off his feet pri#cess style MY PRINCESS YOU DID SO WELL I'LL REWARD YUOUUU youre right youre a musical genius my god my savior my everything you are light y#u are like a fallen angel to me im gonna go kiss him sloppy now and listen to His Own music and draw him GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE IM A GOKULU#K GIRL thank you for reading so far i really love kenta and he straight up changed my life i got rid of my ocd opened tabs so i could#watch the stream and i started drawing after 3 years and got back into music and made friends bc of him genuinely i love this guy so much#and no amount of content creation or words could ever convey it but i'll do s o either way i love this community i love my friends i lvoe m#paralive friends i love kenta. i lov ekneta i love kenta
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Last post before I crash and no-one hears from me until I return from my first final the morrow’s eve (a changed man no doubt) but there’ll never be anything funnier to me than consistently being viewed as a composed and calm saviour by peers while I’m, actively and uncontrollably losing it.
#not said sarcastically or as a vent by the way I genuinely find it so terribly amusing. you think I have it together ? aw <3 you fool.#i’ve been pacing around my room like a starving lion since the past week in whatever free time i’ve had.#and i keep getting people in my messages begging me for last minute help ? which is endearing but. i’m hanging on for dear life myself#helping isn’t foreign to me; i have 4 (?) people in my class who almost exclusively refer to me as ma’am and even refer to me as a teacher.#but helping last minute is so. deeply chaotic.#and I have this issue with me where having others around me makes me immediately drop into a ‘role’ of sorts?#i’ll be freaking out but then someone else starts freaking out around me and my immediate response is to just.#hey. we are going to make it out of this. it’s easy as pie. do you see me worried? no right? <- on the verge of hyperventilating#there’s this one guy in particular who got so excited to find out we have the exact same examination set-up tomorrow.#i gave him like basic pointers and i don’t think i’ve ever been thanked so earnestly and desperately in my life.#i remember during mocks my friends would message me what I wrote in questions and then they’d immediately go oh thank Fuck.#they’d literally just act like they’re absolutely going to pass now just because we had points in common.#as if i’m some sort of fucked up correct answer sheet incarnate.#it’s genuinely really sweet to me though; like i’m not posting this ranting or such.#having so much faith in another to the point that you can put yourself completely at ease says. alot i think.#and i’m glad i can be that person for so many.#and I feel like it helps me in a way too because i become so concerned with others that I forget to drown myself in my worries.#i forget that I’m worried because there are others to care about and console and help. so i suppose they help me in a way as well.#but also who is going to be that person for ME. who is going to console ME. im going fucking neurotic /jest#<- woman with ego issues & control issues who would rather die than accept help.#sigh. oh well. I’m sure we’ll do just fine. cannot wait#🥀🍷 — colloquy.
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i think i finally realized why ive been feeling so damn depressed lately again
sorry for writing this here. im really hurting actually. im not good. i feel a bit helpless too. idk who to talk to bc i dont want to burden anyons and i donf feel like anything could console me right now
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Like. fuck me man. thanks for saving me but. why the hell are you not here. i dont want to do this without you. i hate only being able to remember you. i was supposed to grow old with you, not without you.
And. honestly. even with all this bullshit i say here, all the endless times i spend trying to write down my feelings, abt you, about all the pain ive felt my life, it doesnt get better. not at all. and no words, no poetry takes it away and i truly feel like nobody will ever truly understand how suffocated i felt all my life.
and i want to change thanks to you but. i dont know. nothing's satisfying enough.
no matter what, i truly only feel great when im in that daydream like world you created.
and these past days ive been thinking a lot that. i really wouldnt mind dying right now. not at all. because at least i know what happiness feels like. and i want to stay in that state. probably, even in this life your music will bring me happiness, but i want to be trapped in it.
im tired of being so unseen, and even when im seen, im hurting. but i dont know whats hurting. i think im just really tired thats all.
and. ye. i feel brave tbh. i still havent posted my video to instagram, bc im not brave for that. i dont know. and i feel like a hypocrite bc everything is true that i wrote there but at the same time these are my thoughts currently
in a long while i looked up suicide methods again. i feel so hopeful, but im not really sure if really for the future. jm sorry this is probably alarming. i will probably not kill myself but. idk. im not sure actually. i dknt know what to say. i wasnt cut out for this wordly shit.i feel unlovable but even if im loved, i donf want to be. i dont want anything. just let me stsy in this quiet place snd just. disappear. i wouldnt want my family to hurt if i die but i wont know about it anyways. idk man. i feel strongly i could die calmly this time and thats nice. bc 6 years ago i was terrified, and hurt. but now im content and kind of ready idk man. its not a terrible feeling, its a "this is it, it was nice while it lasted" ig.
there are no clouds in my head actually. i truly dont feel like im thinking irrationally, i feel like this would just be like. the end goal i was looking for. to feel true love once. it was nice.
no goodbye yet bc idk how id kms even if i do. But ill tell u guys if i found something.
#you know it's funny#i still feel this way but the moment i wrote this#on tiktok one of my friends that was there for most of my times followed my secret tiktok account and#the friend that i lost last year checked my account and#i hope she fucking knows how much that means to me#because i always felt like she hstes me but i still deeply feel she cares abf me and silently looks out for me and i feel so sorry#bc in the past 4 days she has checked my account multiple times and idk man#i truly feel like she sees that im struggling i appreciate it a lot#but i could never tell her that because what if im wrong and also#i dont fit in that friendship anymore#but im still really greatful#for checking up on me even like this#*most of my life#noticed a typo#idk anyways i just really needed to scream this into the void. I didn't want to be so sad today. i just scrolled instagram to numb myself#all day. but i got off my phone it was terrible. idk. i feel im not sure i can get my shit together by monday#im sick of having to fall apart and build myself up every fucking day man. and each day i literally wake up telling myself affirmations#trying to convince myself that its oka#it will be okay at least when u are home at night. wait for that moment everyday but. im tired of waiting for night to be happy man.#i have 30 mins to either post that fuckin video and make a fool of myself bc i told myself i need to post it on the 19th. but idk man. Im#terrified it will only disappoint me. people will make fun of me. idk man. its not that funny is it. or is it? how pathetic i am for clingi#g to the only hope in my life like a fucking abandoned dog man. but what can i do. i dont want to depend on you so much. but then who shoul#i depend on? if i depend on myself im just gonna kill myself man.idk. my grief is getting worse day by day. i still practice guitar everyda#hoping that maybe you will come back or something will come back. maybe mywill to live will come back? maybe the Instrument will play a not#that I can depend on? i dont really know what im looking for thats the worst. living is uncomfortable and dark. even when im smiling with m#friends i feel lost.there's something i feel like they know and i dont. when they could name their favorite colors in kindergarten i alread#knew something was different abt me.its really isolating.not having a clue of who am i.i keep saying im finding myself more and more but tb#i still in a way like im always wearing a costume. i wonder how naked id have to be to find myself. sorry for word vomitting.it maybe helps#anyways acchan i miss you.this world feels really stale without you.i wish I could truly show how much I love you with my words or life but#i dont really think it makes a difference.my voice really doesnt matter that much in the end.maybe im too much
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lauretta & carlo before marriage. to me
#“i'll even take your lead” (!!!!)#“who cares what all those folks will say”#“ur husband's fine but im the lucky guy who gets to dance w you”#m2#“i found myself a partner who knows my style” (!!!)#<- the whole fiancé thing. if you look at it in the abstract if you write the situation differently:#she could've refused on moral grounds she could've said no#but she didn't. bc she's also immoral like him. it's their common trait (it's a hc thing ofc!!)#honestly i wrote that fiance thing to emphasize the point that they're both don't fit in with society#<- and it's all rooted in the fact that innovators almost always don't fit in with society#m2 writers made an innovator antagonist and thought no one could make him & his surroundings worse. fools
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when you excitedly bring up holic to somebody on the internet and they reply 'oh yeah, i vaguely remember that thing from when i was 12 ive certainly seen it i guess' and you just have to pretend you werent excited and be like 'haha yeah! nvm... '
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#xxxholic#being socially awkward and anxious and a conversation killer makes this so much more annoying#im like I PUT MYSELF OUT THERE AND MADE A FOOL OF MYSELF FOR NOTHING..#becomes mushroom in corner of room and traces lines in the carpet haha yeah who cares about the best series of all time#not me aha
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I honestly just want to disappear...
#not me crying at work and making a damn fool out of myself today#I hate the way I look and a coworker. friend kept pointing out how goofy I it just set me over the edge#im always available for people that would never give me the time of day#who cares
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study smart not hard (altough both is best actually) this saying is so true
#my advice#but this saying is sooo true#i know some people at uni who study for exam so long and hard but then fail or just barely make it :(#like what are you doing? i don't mean this in a mean way but it doesn't have to be this difficult#i don't understand how some people can study for an exam for 2 weeks or even a month and still fail and i don't think they're stupid#or i don't see myself as particulary smart#but i guess they just waste their time a lot and i realized studying effective is so important#now everyone is a bit different and has to find what works best for them but there are certain techniques which are proven to work well#there is so much information on the internet on this look it up seriously#it made my life sm easier i never struggled in uni like i did in school and i get good grades#and if i ever struggled a bit it was because i started so late it was almost impossible to pass 😂#which is why to do both is still best 😂#but i actually always made it and i never failed an exam at uni (which i studied for)#(two i was fooled into to just try without studying bc it's easy lol)#i mean i shouldn't speak too soon but i already made it through some of the most difficult of my studies#ofc it depends on what you study how well this works but i'm speaking for myself#i once passed an exam with a B studying only 2 days as one of the best students while others studied 2 weeks#and got worse grades or failed#still studying only 2 days is stupidity don't do it 😅#so the techniques i find very helpful are ofc exam questions probably the best one#if there are none make your own#then blurting for which there are different ways but i like to just go over a topic and then write down everything i remember#then fill the gaps#quizlet is also great it's an app which allows you to create cards and then tests you in creative ways#videos can be helpful as well for summaries and using summaries in general is normally enough it saves you sm time#normally you don't actually need to know everything but you should be careful it's not a bad summary leaving out too much 😅#and i also like mindmaps bc i'm a very visual person#but all those tipps are mostly for remembering information so it doesn't work so well for other fields of study#well i hope this is somewhat helpful idk 🙈#oh and reading texts over and over again is the most useless in my opinion i don't remember much at all and it takes sm time
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rough week
#i am . going through it#shits been ROUGH man .#instead of talking abt the serious stuff i will instead talk abt my silliest problem with the easiest solution . godbless#i genuinely think talking about one piece with other one piece fans would help my mental health#because i am not getting nearly enough dopamine rn like in general and talking abt things im passionate abt w ppl who actually care#wld def help#but also i am so utterly terrified of talking abt one piece with like . other one piece fans#i literally have nothing worth saying#i dont know what id even talk abt . i have nothing new to say . nothing that hasnt already been talked abt yk#im not worth talking to like i genuinely have nothing to say that hasnt already been said#i will make a fucking fool of myself#FUCK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#dies . falls on my fucking face#ace speaks#literally how did i manage this before . how the fuck was i making friends before this
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Hm.
#i feel like a disappointment#everytime i think things are finally good and i think that im doing good as a boyfiend#something happens to tell me im lying to mysepf#i cant meet her needs#she told me she wanted a break#and i really did think for some stupid reason that yesterday i was being a good boyfeiend#i jut thought i was doing something right finally#i was really trying to be mature and talk calmly to her and be a source of positivity#the fact that it didnt help her at all#and the fact that she thought it was stupid#makes me feel disgusting#it seems like every time i think things are okay im just fooling myself#i dont know hpw to make her see that i care for her#if everyrhing that i do doesnt show it i dont know how to#i make her feel distant and like im never there for her#she says i have proven that i dont care about her#i dont know how ive proven that but not the fact thst i love her and i really would do anything for her#i want to change for her#i would do everything i can to change#i just dont know why i cant do anything right with her#i just feel so hopeless#i dont know how to get her to believe im on her side#ahes going theough so much amd all i want to do is be there for her#if what i was doing yesterday didnt work ill try again harder#i just want her to know thst i do care and i do love her#ill show her hpw much she means to me and ill make sure she knows i understand her#i just have to try harder#i just hope shes okay#i wish she knew im on her side. i just feel like for whatever reason she cant fully see me as someone who wants to#do something for her and make her feel better
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#guys I’m done with letting my ex gf treat me like shit I’m gonna find myself a new person and she’ll be so mad but I won’t care#kinda what she gets for deciding that I’m not worthy of being forgiven for petty fucking mistake I made#a mistake I made on account of the fact that I’m ✨mentally ill✨ and forgot to take my meds (ALSO ITS NOT LIKE I FUCKING CHEATED ON HER)#gonna start fooling around with other people dont fucking care If It makes her jealous I’m pretty enough that I can get anyone I fucking wa#Is it a toxic mentality? Yeah it sure is but who the fuck cares it’s not my problem that she has the audacity to throw me under the bus#and then be on and off with being my friend like fuck you bitch I thought you loved me but no you’re like everyone else and you think I’m#a fucking psycho and YKW maybe I am but at least I’m HONEST
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sake and sass — ryomen sukuna x f!reader
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a/n: was imagining drunk sukuna so now he is here and we have made him drink enough for three elephants so yes he is drunk drunk and you kinda take advantage of that to boss him around cuz why not
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sukuna rarely drinks. not because he dislikes it, but because it takes an absurd amount of alcohol to even faze him. tonight, though? tonight, he’s hit that threshold.
the room reeks of sake, and sukuna’s massive frame is sprawled across the cushions like a spoiled tyrant—robe disheveled, crimson eyes slightly hazy.
the usually indomitable king of curses looks dangerously close to tipping over.
“you’re drunk,” you state bluntly, arms crossed as you observe the man you call your husband.
he scoffs, waving a sake bottle with an air of arrogance that doesn’t quite land. “nonsense. I don’t get drunk.”
“you don’t?” you reply, deadpan. “so why are you swaying like a tree in a storm?”
he sits up straighter—or tries to, at least.
one of his four hands gestures vaguely in your direction, the movement wobbly but pointed. “watch your tongue, woman. you’ve grown far too bold for your own good.”
you sigh, stepping closer despite his poorly disguised glare. “sukuna, you’re making a fool of yourself. just lie down before you hurt yourself.”
“hurt myself?”
he lets out a bark of laughter, though it’s slurred at the edges. “the great sukuna doesn’t—” he pauses, narrowing his eyes in a glare. “wait, did you just call me a fool?”
“I did,” you reply matter-of-factly, reaching for the bottle in his hand. “and you’re proving me right by the second.”
he jerks the bottle away, a scowl pulling at his lips. “touch it, and I’ll crush your fingers.”
“like you could even aim right now,” you retort, snatching the bottle before he can react.
his eyes narrow dangerously, but instead of retaliating, he slumps back against the wall, arms crossing over his broad chest. “you’re insufferable,” he mutters.
“and you’re impossible,” you counter, setting the bottle far out of his reach.
his gaze follows you as you move, sharp despite the alcohol dulling his senses.
“you think you’re so clever, don’t you?” he growls. “always strutting around. that smug little grin of yours—I’d rip it off if it didn’t…” he trails off.
“if it didn’t what?” you prompt, leaning closer with an amused grin.
his brows knit together, and he glares at you like it’s your fault the words are spilling out.
“none of your damn business,” he snaps, voice low and heated. “always grinning, always back-talking. you’re insufferable. insolent. infuriating.”
“and yet here you are, married to me,” you quip, unable to resist teasing him.
“because no one else could survive you,” he bites back.
you blink, momentarily caught off guard. “is that your way of saying you like me?”
“don’t flatter yourself,” he grumbles, his ears turning an unmistakable shade of pink which you honestly can’t tell if it’s embarrassment or just the alcohol.
you laugh softly, crouching beside him with a damp cloth. “you’re a real romantic, sukuna.”
“shut up,” he snaps, but he doesn’t pull away when you press the cloth to his face, wiping away the traces of spilled sake.
you’re careful not to press too hard as you wipe his face, trying to clean up the mess he’s made of himself without provoking his drunken temper.
but it seems sukuna has no plans of cooperating tonight.
as soon as you pull the cloth away, one of his hands shoots out to grab your wrist. his crimson eyes, though hazy, are filled with devilishness.
“enough with the fussing,” he growls, tugging you closer. “you’ve done your part. now, take that robe off.”
you blink at him, utterly unimpressed. “oh, absolutely not.”
“you dare to deny me?” he snaps, his voice dipping into something far too commanding for a man who can barely sit upright.
“I dare,” you reply, pulling your wrist free. “now sit still, or I’ll tie you down.”
he glares at you, two of his hands fumbling to tug at the collar of your robe. “you wretched, stubborn woman,” he snarls, his movements clumsy.
“always thinking you’re above the rest—thinking you can deny me. I could level cities, but you think you can boss me around?”
“I don’t think; I know,” you reply flatly, dodging his clumsy attempts to grab at your robe. “now, go to bed.”
“bed?” he scoffs, attempting to rise to his full height, only to stumble back onto the cushions.
“I don’t need a bed. I need my wife, right here, shutting that sharp little mouth for once.”
“you need water and sleep,” you deadpan, retrieving a fresh cup of water from the tray nearby. you thrust it into his hand, ignoring the glare he shoots your way. “drink.”
he sniffs the cup like a suspicious child, frowning. “this isn’t sake.”
“brilliant observation,” you reply dryly. “drink it anyway.”
his crimson gaze narrows on you, clearly debating whether defiance is worth the effort.
with a low growl, he downs the water in one gulp before tossing the cup aside dramatically. “there. satisfied?” he mutters.
“not even remotely,” you reply, grabbing his arm and pulling. “up. you’re going to bed.”
to your surprise, he lets you tug him halfway to his feet before deciding he’s had enough of listening.
one of his lower arms snakes around your waist, pulling you flush against him. his breath is warm against your neck, and his grin is downright wicked.
“you’re always like this,” he mutters, his lips brushing dangerously close to your ear. “impossible. insolent. arrogant. bossing everyone around.”
“someone has to, considering how you’re acting right now,” you reply, jabbing a finger into his chest.
“and smug,” he growls, his voice dipping into something darker.
“always grinning at me like you’ve bested me somehow. do you think you’re clever, woman? that you’re better than me?”
“right now? yes,” you reply, yanking the hem of his robe to cover more of his chest.
he catches your wrist again, his grip firm but not painful.
“you’re not better than me,” he hisses, though his voice is softer now, almost petulant. “you’re just...impossible. and clever. and—damn it—too damned beautiful for your own good.”
you freeze for a moment, caught off-guard by the unexpected admission.
“don’t look at me like that,” he snaps, his glare returning in full force. “your face is annoying enough without adding that stupid look to it. it’s maddening.”
“noted,” you say with a small smile, gently prying his hand off your wrist. “now lie down before you embarrass yourself further.”
he doesn’t move, his gaze locking onto yours.
“you’re unbearable,” he declares, voice rising in irritation. “always acting like you’re untouchable. damned arrogance and a damned grin.”
“mmhm,” you reply nonchalantly, guiding him to lie down. “and yet you keep me around.”
“because I have no choice,” he retorts right away, though there’s no heat behind the words.
“you’re mine. mine to deal with. mine to hate. mine to…” he grits his teeth, his gaze averting. “mine to keep, damn it.”
you blink.
“don’t get the wrong idea,” he adds quickly, his voice sharper now.
“I’m not saying I enjoy your insufferable company. but I’d rip apart anyone who thought they could take you from me.”
“sweet dreams to you, too,” you reply, tucking the covers around him as he finally starts to drift off.
“insolent woman,” he mutters one last time before his breathing evens out, the alcohol finally pulling him under.
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i get the everyone leaving you for mental health issues thing if it helps you aren’t alone
this is very sweet, anon. i really appreciate it, i hope you're doing well and being kind to yourself as much as possible <3 /p
#➳ the fool's mail box#➳ sender; anonymous#like yesterday i was miserable but i also feel like i was being annoying#on one hand it's like ''tf it isnt my fault i was literally crying for hours'' but on the others it's like ''damn who tf cared i was#probably just being annoying and making myself look unstable ick''#y'knoww . but it's fine . nobun has like . blocked me lol#i think at least idk lmao#but yeah um <3 ty for this lol#honestly just small things like this really help so . i really do appreciate this <3 :) /gen /p
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