#if anyone makes fun of me this post is GONE!!!!!!!
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i have FINALLY finished. the stupid robot book.
the best i can say about it is that it doesn't read like a first draft, and that the concept of a robot western is pretty enticing. i wish it had stuck to being that instead of overreaching.
structurally, the book kind of front loaded all the Apocalypse Exposition, which i think was a mistake. one, because it made it so that the plot didn't start until halfway through the book and basically didn't introduce the rest of the cast until then. two, because the exposition was stupid and made me think very little of the story and the author. and three, because i think Good post-apocalyptic thrillers are much better at playing with the mystery of it, to drop snippets of lore like yummy morsels and make you dig for it. the plot itself was of course tied to The Backstory, but i still feel like the story would have been much stronger as a novella that didn't go through the backstory at all. this book failed at being speculative fiction, the only genre it did OK was the western.
also this is so petty but there's a glossary in this book, but it only explains extremely obvious terms to the point of condescension. however, all the robots refer to the past human population as "HumPop" which i thought was some interesting robot speak created for the book (even if it clashes with the way they usually speak like rednecks), but i wondered why this wasn't in the glossary. a friend enlightened me that "GenPop" is a common phrase in crime procedurals. are you kidding me
i also don't really care for how this book talked about "madkind" (robots who have gone craaaazyyyyyy and were solely introduced in thr last quarter of the book in an attempt to do mad max: fury road) and comfortbots (there was an uncomfortably long sequence describing them as sentient sex toys). but what did i expect.
the only part i genuinely ENJOYED was the dynamic between the protag and the enemies-to-begrudging-friends guy, aka the only other character that had any substance. like that relationship carried the whole book for me, especially since the other character that had any rapport with the protag got sploded as soon as i thought "could it be..... robot yuri?". haha.
also, interestingly, a Lot of the major characters were female, with the caveat that most of them were robots and it was silly of them to have genders to begin with. the book??? passes the bechdel test???? for all the good it does it.
anyway i cannot recommend this book to anyone. read the murderbot diaries for good robots. read the broken earth trilogy for good apocalypse fiction. watch mad max: fury road for fun vibes.
once again bravely attempting to continue my readthrough of Robot Book.
when it's not doing backstory exposition, it's actually not so bad. there's a very fun dynamic between the protagonist and another robot who tried to poach her for parts, and who are now forced to work together. like that's genuinely compelling and i want to see where it goes.
Unfortunately the backstory exposition chapters make me wanna scream into a pillow. the book tries to be smart and clever but is deeply unaware of like... people and dynamics that exist in the real world. it could have done many interesting things with the world building, but it can't, because it wants robots that act and speak like cowboys and talk of god and heaven and hell. that could have worked if it had just handwaved the past away and didn't go into the backstory of how we got here. maybe this whole thing is like an alternative history thing a la fallout where the robot revolution happened in the early 1900ds or something, because at this point it's the only thing that could make sense.
weird backstory thing #1:
so the protag, pre apocalypse, belonged to an old man who dies in his sixties. he had a wife twenty years his junior who he had married twenty years prior, which most people in our world acknowledge as Kinda Creepy and Mayhaps A Red Flag. but okay. then we find out that this wife, while admiring how her husband chose to age, used anti-aging technology on herself so that she looked like a twenty-something year old for the duration of the marriage. it is described as "a gift she gave to her husband" which is such a chillingly creepy sentence it literally gives me goosebumps. it's says her husband never asked for it and also that she was not a type to care about what others think. i think this book is trying to portray this as romantic, that she loved her husband deeply and thought of him often and fondly after her death and never remarried. THIS IS KINDA WEIRD RIGHT. like the way it is presented without zero awareness of real life dynamics is weirding me out. will this be brought up later with sinister implications or are we just accepting this????? time will tell.
weird backstory thing #2
i already complained about the robots choosing to have genders despite the robots also not caring about "human values" anymore. this book is from 2017, so i get that it isn't like, particularly aware of transgender philosophies, but it also Could have been. anyway, there was another passage about Robot Gender. with warning for transphobia:
head in hands. didn't even try.
there's so much interesting commentary ripe for the picking but this book just Doesn't. just will not
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listened to the EVIL FUCKED UP worm in my brain and posting my guy🫡
couple facts about this FREAK!!!!
-he knows japanese, and works as an online language teacher!! also does art commissions as a side thing
-he. has no name right now😭 thought of just. slapping my own name on him since hes like. self insert. but thats lame
-rhythm game player. 'nough said.
-originally lived in kansas. fucking loser/j
-his head is a blackberry curve 8300
#if anyone makes fun of me this post is GONE!!!!!!!#half joking#dialtown#dialtown fanart#dialtown art#dialtown phone dating sim#dialtown oc#dialtown oc art#randy jade#dialtown randy jade#gingi
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.
#ok im making one more dot post and then i am (hopefully) getting off tumblr and going to bed#liam payne#death#i do suggest not reading tbh because its just gonna be waffle. anyways#ive distanced myself from the boys for years for a multitude of reasons. mainly that they did things that disappointed me and i realised the#way i was attatched to them was unhealthy. so for the most part i listened and enjoyed the music and didnt pay Much attention to anything#else. and like liam. i always liked him in the band days because to me he was the underdog. the underappreciated and probs less stanned one#out of all of them. and when youre a fan i do feel like a lot of us just wanted them all to be appreciated. idk. but anyways yeah i did feel#for him. due to him backgroud growing up. his talent. etc etc. even though he wasnt my fav. and even when he did something wrong my teenage#self still defended him like my life depended on it. (embarassing) anyways. his solo music while it was not my fav i still occasionally#enjoyed. its just over produced pop like it was fine and i found it fun. in terms of him as an actual person by this point in his career i#didnt pay attention to him or the others that much anymore#and like. yeah as of recently as more stuff came out about him being kinda weird and rude and abusive 🙃🙃🙃 that was kind of the final#straw for me! like in terms of me giving a fuck about him. if he eventually came around cool but i wasnt gonna wait around for it.#god this whole thing feels so dramatic but i need to get it oit or i Know i will not be at peace lmao anyways#so yeah come to hearing about his death which. i hear about because of trin lovell on twitter like. shsvshs. anyways my reaction was#disbelief and just... nothing? like i said in my brain i had just disregarded him honestly. and even now i still just feel speechless.#to summarise my feelings. fuck him for how he treated his ex and probably other women as well. but also. he was my boy. he'll always be a#part of me. and it feels weird that hes just. gone. he suffered a lot with addiction and pressures etc and its just. sad that hes gone now.#that he never got to get better. and he wont get the chance to. im sad for his family. and anyone else thats gonna be affected by this#im always gonna remember him.#and thats all i have to say. honestly part of me feels SO dramatic for even typing all this out but here we are.#if anyone has read this far and wants someone to talk to im more than happy. and also just wanna make clear that i am fine#le text post
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Writing over 30,000 words worth of content for a fic only to realize it’s all pointless because you have no interest in it anymore and you were never gonna finish it anyway….
What even is The Point anymore
#current mood#it’s so joever#this isn’t even the worst part honestly#what really sucks is that this project was the last thing in my life I had any sustainable interest in and now that’s gone too.#now I have nothing. like#the fuck am I supposed to do??? get a new interest??? that’s fucking impossible#nothing hits like it used to and everything is just….bland….and SO MUCH EFFORT to get into#like hobbies are so difficult? and my old hobbies (ex writing) are becoming more and more toxic and like a chore rather than something fun#like writing at this point has become a battle of perfectionism and I’m fucking losing#what am I supposed to do. nothing inspires me. I have no interests. no hobbies. not many friends irl#and it’s not like we ever hang out because people are a fucking piece of work#either they cling to you like dog shit or they never respond to your texts no in between#im just so tired of existing??? and also college??? is fine but like#what the fuck am I DOING here like#why am I getting an art degree??? is this really how I should be spending my time and my parents money?#what the fuck am I gonna do for a job??? what do I WANT from a job???? I don’t even fucking know#i can’t see myself being happy in life doing anything and that’s such a nonstarter#it makes it impossible to start planning anything because I feel paralyzed with fear#and like I said….i don’t have any interests. I don’t LIKE anything. I am the antithesis of curiosity and interest like. there’s just nothing#i can’t do this anymore#im so done#idk why I made this so long but#I guess I have a lot on my mind I wanted to share#sorry for cringe posting on main it will happen again#im sorry in general actually for everything im sorry for being needy and attention seeking and annoying and flaky and never finishing any of#my fics because I lose interest and for not responding to anyone in my inbox I’m sorry#personal#cringe#cringetober#long tags
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Can't wait for you to announce you're back on OF. I'll happily pay the full price too, this pup and her holes are worth every penny
It is time! *some sort of grand music starts playing
#my post style is going to be wayy more relaxed so im hoping people will still enjoy it 🥲#i need to not be so extra since i just keep burning myself out with it so that's why i vanish off the face of the earth#this time theres no schedule or themes only daily post#im also trying to do what I've done here and only make and post things i think are hot/cute and not worry what anyone else thinks#like yes it matters in the sense people need to like it to stick around but#since being more me on here my accounts gone crazy so really hoping the more genuine#personal vibes are received well over there too#but yeah imma stop waffling now and im probably not going to mention about it again#link in pinned post if you wanna join the fun over there
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wouldn’t it be fun if the squip not only optic blocked michael but also made jeremy completely forget about him
#has this been done before#like#he has access to his memories i’m assuming#if he made jeremy think/feel like he was completely friendless#and without anything or anyone holding him back it would’ve been even easier#that also means unless the squip lies to him (which he could and does i’m pretty sure) jeremy chooses to forget about michael#if he does lie to him and jeremy only agrees to optic block him then it’s ‘optic nerve blocking on’#and ‘click’ 12 years of his life with michael gone just like that#and he doesn’t even realise#he meets michael in the bathroom and he’s slowly like ‘i know you. you’re very familiar to me but i have no idea who you are’#cause the squip is off and i doubt 12 years of memories can just come back in a snap#that’s also why he has no idea why ‘get out of my way loser’ is so emotionally devastating to michael#cause he has no memories of michael mell as a person at all#no matter how familiar he feels he’s just a guy in a bathroom. and that’s all he’ll be#would make for some fun angst content no#man my tags are really where all the interesting stuff is huh#tags compared to the post is a 12 to 1 ratio#anyways feel free to steal the idea idk if i’m gonna do anything with it#cant draw cant write#but like tell me if you do yk#bmc#be more chill#jeremy heere#michael mell#bmc jeremy#jeremy bmc#bmc michael#michael bmc#boyf riends#<- that would make it even WORSE
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um... l*stappies are THIS delulu? pathetic
*stares dramatically and semi-drunkenly into the middle distance* oh, anon. lestappies are a whole other brand im afraid 😔
and like, i appreciate being delusional as much as the next person! hi hello here i am on tumblr dot com!! but oh my god... having to hunt in the insta likes to find that max liked pierre's post of charles... and using that as your "ship moment" crumbs... good lord. that's a just another level.
to be entirely fair to the lestappies, though, if they didn't go to such extreme lengths to invent content for their ship, they wouldn't have any. so i guess i can see where they're coming from! could NEVER be me, though 😌✌️ as a piarles girlie, i am consistently thriving, well-fed and happy <333 😘
#asks & answers#anon#anti lestappen#sorry for being this mean on main hahahahahaha a ive had a few drinks my filter is gone#but like. oh my GOD#the lengths they go to... incredible#you can't reason with these people at all#it is impossible#and i hate fandom drama anyway#so my approach has always just been to make a wildly insane tangent in a COMPLETELY different direction#and leave everyone extremely confused#hence the maxierre in that post!#i mean come on#maxierre is a far more logical conclusion than lestappen given that max liked PIERRE'S post#skdhdkdbdkhfdn#and idc what anyone else says but maxierre *is* intriguing to me#so ha. i'll be here having my fun being completely insane (but not as delusional as a lestappie at least)#everyone else can be confused#teehee#i love that for me
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we have now reached the stage of family vacation where i have a meltdown
#mmmmmmm they were just straight up playing an antivax youtube video on tv . it took every ounce of my composure to not burst into tears on#The spot .Ive now gone to bed early so i can go cry very quietly upstairs in my bathroom#its just. it makes me insane my family is so fun and awesome until it comes to their politics !!!!!!!!!!#i try not to think about it very often .but sometimes im just hit fully with the fact that if they knew who I truly am .#there is a scary scary chance they would just never accept me.#its so easy for ppl to say oh if they wont accept you just walk out and leave they never really loved you anyway#but it’s so complicated in real life i cant just leave my family i love them !!!! they love me !!!!!they are all I have#and the thing is I never talk to them about this stuff .i have no idea how they would react and it is Scary#i ache with my whole being sometimes to just share everything with them. im so tired of secrets .it hurts I just wish i could just live#openly with them like some people do#but the possibilities and consequences are just far too grand for me for now#so I just live in this limbo. and I do a good job most of time ignoring the fact that I do#but sometimes (like tonight) it just hits me all once .the weight and burden of all that I hide from everyone.#pride month especially. it can be a very hard time for me#oh I think I hear ppl coming upstairs now gotta make it look like I haven’t been crying bc i do Not want anyone to ask .i will not be able#to answer without sobbing and I cant explain slash excuse my way out of this one without talking abt what’s really going on#And I don’t want to have that conversation for a Long time#ok byebye#kat post
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oh my god this songggg
#luc posts#say its not enough to be in love you need to prove it somehow#its not dollar signs or pick up lines or anything that you could kiss away now#that sinking feeling that you get when you say something you regret cause you were jealous of some stranger that she met when you were gone#you feel insane... cause love is pain#say its not okay to feel that way its real you may not make her happy#so whats wrong with me if honestly i wanna be the only way she can be?#that hollow feeling in your chest as you both wordlessly undress after a fight its getting late#you tried your best but then she cried and youre to blame#and love is pain#dont believe anyone who says any different#if its easy if its fun then somethings missing#theres this dream ive had about mum and dad makes me so sad i wake up crying cant believe ill have to live through that#wish it wasnt mandatory dying#we go through life we play pretend act like it doesnt have to end its alright till your friend runs a red light you watch his car burst int#flames... love is pain
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theres a kickstarter i backed back in march 2021 thats been going through issue after issue during the production process but has been keeping backers updated the whole time and a couple months ago they announced they were finally able to start shipping orders im excited
#had it been a scam it wouldve been fine bc as soon as i give money to things like that i just consider it gone forever so i take the#possibility of that happening into account when deciding whether or not to buy something and when i backed it $115 was Not Hard At All#that was like. two days' worth of tips at most? three if you picked really slow days?#so as far as im concerned i dont have $115 worth of money up in the air right now waiting for repayment#i simply donated $115 to a cool project almost three years ago and now will get a time capsule of a present in the mail at some point#BUT all that being said i dont think its a scam shes been very transparent and accommodating the whole time#like i couldve gotten most of my order by now if i wanted‚ there were wallets that came with the bag and they were the main problem point#bc the manufacturer she used first was Garbage but she wasnt able to get a refund from them#so she offered to ship out everything except the wallets to anyone who wanted it they just had to cover the shipping#n i was like. i dont /need/ any of this it was 100% a fun little treat for me so it being late isnt like. a problem#so might as well save like $20 its win win#and a bunch of people did take her up on it and have been posting abt the quality and they all seem legit#its very funny that ive had to update my address with her twice though KSBDKSBDKDN#and the extra benefit is it really will be a little time capsule present because its been so long ive forgotten most of what i ordered#like i know theres a bag and a wallet and some pins and i think one other thing?#but i dont remember the details of what they look like really or esp the pins i dont remember anything except they were there#maybe the other thing was a popsocket? that sounds probable#anyways. soon it will be bag time>:3c#oh and ofc ppl who didnt order the wallets have already gotten their orders shes not making them wait for us kwbdkshf#so theyve been posting reviews too#im pretty sure 'just refund me for the wallet and give me the rest' was an option#i don't remember for sure and don't want to dig through all FORTY TWO EMAILS to check but id definitely be way more salty abt#the whole situation if they hadnt because thatd be shitty#im bad at remembering things but good at holding deserved grudges so the fact i dont have one tells me she didnt#love having to fuckin. sherlock holmes my own past lmao#but yeah as is im just like. i cannot imagine how much it must suck majorly to be in her shoes so she can take as long as she needs#like a while back i had someone order a thing off etsy ans it didnt notify me at all so they emailed me like a month later like#'hey any updates on my order?' and i was like. FUCK#and i felt terrible for like a month afterwards and gave them a bunch of free stickers to make up for it#and that was yknow. one person who ordered $6 worth of stickers
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The Twitter Marriage
(Oscar Piastri x fem!driver!reader)
Yn Ln has had a crush on fellow driver Oscar Piastri since their f2 days but she never and will never tell him.... at least not to his face
or
In which Aston Martin driver needed the alcohol to confess her feelings
N.B: rushed a bit cause of finals, but I hope you like it. Also, doesn't follow any timeline tbh. NOTHING IN THIS IS ADDS UP IN REGARDS OF DATES AND CHARACTERS AND STUFF, IT IS JUST FOR FUN.
WARNINGS: REALLY BAD PICK UP LINES, SOME SWEAR WORDS. Probably some spelling mistakes as well. Short fic.
faceclaim: sabrina carpenter
Masterlist
Liked by ynmyworld, f1memes, charliethesinglemom and 168,920 others
Keepingupw/f1: Aston Martin driver, Yn Ln, tweets as she celebrates her p3 in Monaco.... it seems like she has something to say to fellow driver, Oscar Piastri.
username: the entire grid is just having fun with that joke.
username: miss ma'am, STAND UP!!
username: what do you mean stand up? SHE FOLDED LIKE A CHAIR
username: understandably so tbf
username: no but her offering to make Spain Oscar's home race LIKE CARLOS ISN'T LOOKING FOR THAT MAN'S BLOOD.
username: so foul of her 💀
username: her tagging him is insane
username: pr is gonna have a headache tomorrow
username: the fact that she's tweeting this shit while in a club, WHERE OSCAR IS A FEW METERS AWAY FROM HER
username: you know she's out of it when she starts using twitter.
Liked by F1_updates_live, ynmyqueen, oscaroopastryy and 184,710 others
Keepingupw/f1: yn ln on her way back to the hotel last night after celebrating her Monaco podium.
username: she got wasted omg
username: now those tweets make sense
username: where did she even get the shoe box from
username: and where did her shoes go, papers fell out of that thing
username: so are you guys gonna post the video or?
username: what video?
username: there's a video going on twitter where these pics are taken from she was so drunk, she was actually dancing in the middle of Monaco (go queen, live your best life) and then the papers fell out of the box and she immediately went down to pick them up and put them back but then after she was halfway through she kept looking at the ground then at the box and then at her feet, you can see her pouting as she kept putting away the little papers in the box again
username: shut upp!!! I need that video! IT IS A LIFE SAVING MATTER ATP
username: yn ln is gonna be the death of me
yn ln has shared a story
text: when you wake up to a video of drunk you on the streets of Monaco and some tweets that should've gone with you to the grave
yn ln has shared a story
text: self pity and cringe time over, back to our regular schedule of slaying
Sebastian Vettel has shared a story
text: someone tell her that staying with me till the Spanish GP isn't going to make people forget that she exists
yn ln has replied to your story: your kids love me! AND SO DOES HANNA
yn ln has replied to your story: also, please take pity on me, I can't face him again, ever, I will just retire, I can't do this
yn ln has replied to your story: why are you ignoring meeeee!!! Not you too, Oscar is already doing thaaaat, I wanna turn into a worm, I'd die quicker if I was a worm, I wouldn't have to go through this much embarrassment if I was a worm
Sebastian Vettel replied to your message: are you drunk right now?
Liked by pierregasly, wtf1, oscaroopastryy and 268,715 others
Keepingupw/f1: we bring you part 2 of the osyn saga
username: i love this family
username: yn is such a pr nightmare
username: the ACTUAL child of fernando
username: wait, now that you reminded me, I need to update the family tree
username: post the updated family tree you coward
username: anyone who doesn't watch f1 will 100% believe that Charles and Nicole are Oscar's parents
username: hey, don't disrespect charles' heartfelt adoption like that
username: this sport is so fucking unserious
username: I refuse to believe that this is real
Sebastian Vettel has shared a story
Text: huh..... it's not so bad having her here
Liked by OscarPiastri, Charles_leclerc, Arthur_leclerc and 918,037 others
yn ln: let her cook now 🧡
username: yn.... yn..... YN.... WHAT ARE YOU COOKING YN
username: it has started, I can feel it in my bones
username: so she's with Oscar now, good to know (screaming into my pillow as I type)
username: oh so if I wear orange I'm dating Lando now, nice to know ig
username: fuck off away from my replies, I wanna have fun
username: yn pls don't, I can't lose you, you were the only wife left standing
username: PLS TELL ME THAT MY SHIP SAILED
username: if I see that australian's face anywhere on this account I will start biting ankles
username: ok Leo, geez, no need to terrorise your sister-in-law
username: I can't believe she was simping on main for a boy that goes 'wut'
Liked by Ynln, pierregasly, Arthur_leclerc and 890,627 others
Oscar Piastri: let him cook 💚
username: nope, no, nuuh, I see nothing
username: other partner's team colors, matching captions, liking the posts..... yup, they're officially dating
username: we lost her to a mini kimi raikkonen
username: I see that as a win tbh
username: kimi was and is the IT girl of the grid
username: how dare you forget about our very own Britney Spears.... nico you will always be missed
username: you can't prove that they're dating from just that
username: oh boy, the delulu is strong with this one
Oscar Piastri and Yn Ln shared a post
Liked by Charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 903,815 others
Yn ln & Oscar Piastri: I said let them cook 💚🧡
username: YES YES YES YES YES YES
username: MY PARENTS
username: This is why women shouldn't be in f1, wtf is wrong with Oscar? Why would he date yn? And what is this hand placement? Where can I get a yn? Or an oscar?
username: slowly deleting my paragraph
username: had us the first half, ngl
username: yn hide oscar really well during the Spain GP, we leave his safety in your hands
username: THE CURLS OMG
username: MR OSCAR JACK PIASTRI WHAT IS THIS BEHAVIOUR WHAT IS THIS HAND PLACEMENT
#oscar piastri x oc#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri x yn#f1 x reader#oscar piastri x fem!reader#oscar piastri fic#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri smau#f1 smau#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x oc#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1 smau#oscar piastri social media au#oscar piastri fluff#f1 imagine#f1 social media au
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Got a post in my reccomended that reminded me of something I need to make clear, that's gone poorly addressed here until now.
Last year, while you may remember it fondly, the toxicity demonstrated by my voters and fanbase regarding who to vote for (especially during the later rounds) was genuinely atrocious. It moved well beyond the point of lighthearted competition and into genuine vile behavior and often ableism that I cannot let slide as we go further into season 2. This extends to (and is primarily relevant to) Donatello fans. I give you guys a lot of credit for the success and fun of this blog, but it is pertinent that you also remember that Donatello fans in particular were credited with the most cruel attitudes in the wake of Mob's victory. I understand being upset because of a loss, but this is ridiculous.
I am not "calling out" or targeting anyone in particular with this. I am well aware that this behavior does not belong to all of you. The majority of yall are darlings and I couldn't be more grateful for your support. But I let you all off way too easy last time.
Let me make it clear: You are voting on your favorite autistic headcanon/canon character. The metric of "autism swag" does not exist, and should never be used to bully or harass other voters. It's a title that was made up and based off of the names of the other poll bloggers at the time, not a real concept. It is not serious, nobody is winning anything besides a PNG that gets put next to their character if they win.
If I catch wind of any genuine death threats, bigotry, or otherwise unnecessary cruelty sent towards any participants during the course of this season, I will start disqualifying characters. If you cannot keep it civil when polls are live, I see no reason why you should be rewarded with your character's victory.
I deeply apologize to anyone who has been by this cruelty. It is my responsibility as this blog's operator to keep behavior civil, and it's something I've been mishandling up until now. This poll has grown well beyond what I originally thought it would be, it has since day one, and I need to prioritize learning how to handle its reach if it's something I want to continue.
The polls will still run as scheduled, this is not an announcement of a delay or cancelation, simply a firm reminder of where I stand on the harassment demonstrated by people in my follower base.
Thank you for your time and understanding. I hope going forward we can all be kinder to eachother, and understand that at the end of the day, we are here to show love towards our favorites, not hatred towards strangers that have done nothing to you.
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SMITTEN - LN
ln x reader, platonic!grid x reader SMAU
based on this request ✧ my inbox is open ✧
warnings: none, just a little swearing throughout - also she's a short one
masterlist the playlist
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿ ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
yourusername made a new post!
liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and 21,223 others
yourusername 10 years ago today, i competed in my final karting race in order to pursue my dream career - and i would do it all over again, especially when i still get to spend my days with these losers
tagged: charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, pierregasly
view all 5,421 comments
maxverstappen1 losers?? i think you mean losers and three time world champion, no?
⤷ yourusername they're not mutually exclusive
charles_leclerc proud of everything you've achieved mon amour
⤷ yourusername you’re just glad i left karting so that i stopped kicking your ass
⤷ charles_leclerc we raced in different categories?
⤷ yourusername the points dont lie leclerc
pierregasly i love you but did you have to chose this photo of me?
⤷ yourusername yes.
⤷ yourusername believe it or not, i have worse ones i couldve used
⤷ francisca.cgomes leak them
⤷ pierregasly bro??
⤷ yourusername cant believe youve just called your own girlfriend bro
yourusername made a new post!
liked by mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 21,223 others
yourusername thank you mclaren for having me today! trying to get the drivers to sit down and answer my questions may have shaved a few years from my life but i had fun regardless!
check out the video on youtube now!
view all 5,421 comments
mclaren thank you for babysitting! 🧡
⤷ yourusername id say anytime but the curly haired one kept asking "why" after every sentence :/
⤷ landonorris babysitting? nah, milf training comment has been deleted
⤷ landonorris ….why?
⤷ yourusername not sure what i did in a past life to deserve this
⤷ username3 yo anyone else see the deleted comment? someone pr train this man pleeeease
landonorris was lovely to see you! stop by anytime 🧡
⤷ username1 "lovely" 👀
username5 working hard or hardly working?
⤷ yourusername working flaccid.
oscarpiastri 🧡
yourusername made a new post!
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 12,358 others
yourusername taking a break from being your favourite journalist to become the ultimate stray cat whisperer
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francisca.cgomes you look so gorgeous meu bem ❤️
⤷ yourusername i am nothing compared to you kiks ❤️
⤷ francisca.cgomes shush you
⤷ yourusername make me 😋😩
landonorris correct! you are my favourite journalist! and i am a stray cat!
⤷ yourusername be so fucking fr rn lando
⤷ username5 i refuse to believe this is real
⤷ oscarpiastri pretty sure i just heard him meow honestly
landonorris hi! im free june 24 if you want to hangout june 24 lmk im not doing anything june 24 please msg me if ur available june 24 so we could maybe hangout or do something june 24 !!
⤷ charles_leclerc lando please stop you're embarrassing youself
⤷ maxverstappen1 no charles, let him cook
⤷ charles_leclerc this is going to end badly
⤷ maxverstappen1 thats what im hoping for
⤷ yourusername you guys are being so mean
⤷ yourusername do it again 😈
username8 she's so beautiful i dont know if i wanna be her or with her
⤷ landonorris i know what im chosing
⤷ yourusername lando this is so unhinged pls move it to the dms
⤷ landonorris yes ma'am 🫡
⤷ yourusername ma'am??? im 2 years older than you not 20
yourusername made a new post!
liked by landonorris, francisca.cgomes , and 23,139 others
yourusername test drive
view all 6,581 comments
username3 test drive? THE CAR OR LANDO?
⤷ username12 that is not lando - surely???
charles_leclerc its june 24th.
⤷ pierregasly he's only gone and done it
⤷ charles_leclerc i fear i will never recover from this
⤷ yourusername french speaking men really are the most dramatic.
⤷ charles_leclerc i can be dramatic in spanish too if you need
⤷ carlossainz55 no gracias 😩
⤷ username3 this confirms it OH MY GOD
username7 what car do you drive?
⤷ yourusername my personal car is just a peugeot 208 but i rented a porsche for the week!
yourusername made a new post!
liked by lewishamilton, mercedesamgf1 and 23,139 others
yourusername back to work, and back to mercedes for the first time in a while! keep your eyes peeled for some race week content coming your way!
tagged: lewishamilton, georgerussell63
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georgerussell63 right well that's just cruel y/n. please violate lewis JUST ONCE
⤷ yourusername lewis didn't have a habit of running me off the track repeatedly
⤷ georgerussell63 that was ONCE. 14 YEARS AGO.
⤷ yourusername that's a strange way of apologising
⤷ username14 sometimes i forget she used to kart with like half of the grid
⤷ username14 like girly out here interviewing her childhood friends every week
mercedesamgf1 i feel like we need context for the last image, y/n
⤷ yourusername there are some things you will never know, admin
landonorris come back to mclaren tf?
⤷ yourusername soon 🤫
username4 lewis actually took part in social content? don't give me false hope i beg of u
⤷ yourusername not only did he take part, but he served cunt whilst doing so
⤷ lewishamilton i don't think i want to know what this means
⤷ yourusername probably for the best grandpa 💖
username15 sorry is everyone just ignoring lando being desperate in the comments?
⤷ yourusername if we ignore him, he'll go away
⤷ landonorris wrong. ill get worse! hope that helps x
yourusername made a new post!
liked by landonorris, lilymhe and 42,601 others
yourusername cats out the bag
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landonorris milf.
⤷ yourusername im not a mother??
⤷ landonorris *yet.
username3 wait how short is she? 'cos lando is not that tall i SWEAR
maxverstappen1 don't you mean...cougar?
⤷ yourusername you wanna talk to me about age gaps rn?
lilymhe that should be me holding ur hand
⤷ yourusername it still can be babygirl
⤷ lilymhe say less
⤷ alex_albon no please do say more - if im losing my girlfriend id like a full explanation
⤷ yourusername my hairline is still intact?
⤷ landonorris devoured.
username15 does he not get bored of you asking him questions all the time?
⤷ yourusername not really, 'cos when i run out of work related questions i spiral into asking if he's mad at me every 20 minutes
⤷ username6 honestly so real for that
#formula 1#lando norris#mclaren#lando norris x reader#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagine#lando norris smut#lando smut#lando x reader#f1 smau#f1 grid x reader#oscar piastri#propertyofwicked#lando norris smau
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Can't Have a Good Thing || My ex is a footballer LS2 edition
[masterlist][my ex series masterlist]
summary you go from dating an american footballer to an american driver
pairings ex!christian pulisic x reader, logan sargeant x reader
warnings probably a little anti pulisic but i still love my baby
notes pictures are from pinterest so thank you to all those lovely users (as I wrote this my english teacher from 11th grade came into my job and it was not fun!)
May 2023 ynusername posted -------
liked by cmpulisic, reece and others
ynusername final chelsea game of the season, love you guys
chelseafc awww we love you too yn ❤️ by author
cmpulisic always love having you there ↳ ynusername wouldn't want to be anywhere else
username1 look at my girl dawg, chelsea is embarrassing her ↳ username2 please, christian didn't even play
reece once a blue always a blue ↳ username3 NAH WHY IS THIS SO CRYPTIC ↳ username4 you can't say shit like this then leave DUDE
username5 that chrisyn interaction screams for help ↳ username6 i wouldn't be surprised if they're not dating anymore but trying to keep up appearances ↳ username7 breakup statement incoming ↳ username8 can we get fabrizio to comment on wag breakups please!! ↳ username7 lol can you imagine a here we go! breakup is official! peak comedy
cesarazpilicueta 💙 ↳ ynusername love you too capitan!
July 2023 real life ---------
It’s been a rough few months in the house for the two of you. Christian’s time at Chelsea was most likely coming to an end, and you had just started a new project at work, so your time was filled with that. Nights spent making dinner and laughing together turned to plates left in the microwave and lights out early. Mornings started with short wake up kisses to hardly whispered goodbyes.
In fewer words, the relationship was falling apart. You barely knew what was going on in each others lives anymore, it’s no surprise when he tells you he’s leaving Chelsea.
Chris is still in Florida with his family, enjoying the last few days off before preseason. You had been with him for the 4th of July, but needed to fly back to London almost immediately for a new project and you’re exhausted. When he Facetimes you it’s almost 11:30 at night and your still sitting in your home office, but with how excited Chris is, he can’t tell that you’re operating on extremely low levels of energy. You want to be excited for him, but you can see the writing on the wall.
“Hey babe.” You know what’s coming, but it doesn’t make the shock any less. “I’ve got some big news.” He waits for you to say something, but all you do is blink and nod. “AC Milan are going to sign me.” He waits again for you to say something. “Did you hear me? I’m leaving Chelsea.”
“Yeah, I heard you.” Your lack of enthusiasm confuses Christian.
“Then why aren’t you excited?”
Your apathy turns to frustration quickly and you shift in the chair. “Because, Christian, I’m not just going to blow up my life in London to follow you to a new city. I’ve got a job here and it’s going well. I don’t want to have to start all over again. Not to mention learning a whole new language. Have you considered how isolating that would be for me?”
“So what, I just rot at Chelsea because you don’t want to move?” He is now just as defensive as you, words biting at the holes that have formed in your relationship, making them grow.
“I didn’t say that!” You sit up even straighter, putting your phone down against the computer so it stands on it’s own.
“Well it sounds like you don’t want to leave.”
“I don’t want to pack up my life and move to a new country where I don’t know anyone.”
You could see the fight leave his body as he came to the same realization you did. “What’s going to happen to us?”
“I think we’re done Chris.” You can feel your heart break that last little bit with the words you say. You love Christian, but with everything you’ve gone through, it’s not enough.
twitter ---------
September 2023 real life ------
In one hand you held your phone, looking down at the details of your train back to London, in the other a hot chocolate to warm you up in the brisk wind of Oxford. It’s how you missed the body in front of you and ended up falling straight on your ass because of it, hot chocolate splashing onto your shirt.
“Fucking hell,” you whispered, pulling your shirt away from your body so it didn’t burn.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” said an American accent. You groaned in your head, not wanting to deal with this. “I should’ve been looking where I was going.” They put a hand in your face, gesturing to help you up, which you took.
“No, it was my fault, I was staring at my phone,” you told them as they pulled you up. He was strong, and also probably a little awkward as he was still holding your hand.
“Me too, so I really won’t let you take the blame.” His awkward smile was also cute, but you tried not to think that, it wouldn’t agree with your ‘no boys agenda.’ “Do you need another hot chocolate?” The cup was empty at your feet, making you wince.
“Yeah, probably another shirt too.” It’s at that point that he realizes he’s still holding your hand, and he drops it.
“Let me get you one.”
“Don’t worry about it.” You’re still very early for the train, but travel anxiety is terrible and you want to leave soon.
“I insist.” Something about his smile and red cheeks makes you say yes to him, and you’re really not sure why. “I’m Logan, by the way.” He’s leading you back into the line of the cafe, smiling at you still.
“I’m YN,” you tell him.
ynusername posted ---------
liked by logansargeant, benchilwell, and others
ynusername exploring oxford finally
bsfinstagram babe you run into any quidditch players ↳ ynusername bitch you know i'm swearing off athletes
username7 damn why are you so beautiful
samkerr 💞 ↳ ynusername ugh bestie i love you
pulisick10 'SWEARING OFF ATHLETES?' Christian mate pulisic what did you do!?! ↳ username8 that is so fucking harsh though like pulisic really did a number on our girl here ↳ pulisick10 ben chilwell still in the likes tho ↳ username8 nah her and ben are friends, like ben was always close with christian and just cause he left doesn't mean that she can't be friends still ↳ username8 also she's still good friends with the women's team ↳ pulisick10 well that's cause the women are better ❤️ by ynusername and bsfinstagram ↳ username8 NOT HER LIKING THAT but also won't argue with that
logansargeant at least the weather was good ↳ ynusername youre right, thank you english sun who comes out once in a blue moon ��� bsfinstagram I'm questioning things ↳ ynusername well you shouldn't
username11 she's sworn off athletes but has a formula 1 driver in her comments... ↳ username12 fake bitch ↳ username13 two people can be friends right? ↳ username12 she breaks up with christian because of the distance but is talking a driver like he isn't gone more than half the year, she's definitely fake for that ↳ username13 how do you know that's why they broke up ↳ username14 she doesn't she's just being a hater ❤️ by ynusername ↳ username11 damn all this fighting on my comment thread?
username12 not yn liking so many comments, do you read them ↳ ynusername gotta appreciate a good laugh ↳ username13 yn stalks her comments like a real one should
twitter ---------
yn's messages -----------
November 2023 yn's messages ------------
real life --------
Your hotel room is kind of a mess, with clothes thrown around and various pieces of paper on the floor. It’s not really a surprise to Logan, even though he hasn’t known you very long.
After a long day exploring New York City in fairly okay weather, the two of you are relaxing in your hotel room before dinner. “Can I ask you something?” Logan asks. He’s currently sitting in the desk chair, feet propped up on the desk and head hung back.
“Go ahead.” You’re on your bed, laying like a starfish.
“Would you say yes to going on a date with me?” You sit up straight, staring at him with wide eyes as he doesn’t move.
“Are you asking me on a date?”
“No, I’m asking if you’d say yes to me asking you on a date.” His clarification makes you narrow your eyes, but he still doesn’t move.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea right now.”
That gets him moving, turning the chair to look at you. “So would you say yes or no?”
“I’d say no right now.”
“What about in a month?”
“In a month, when we’re both back in England, I’d probably say yes.”
“Cool,” he shrugs, going back to putting his feet on the desk. “Then I’ll ask you again in January.”
ynusername posted ---------
liked by logansargeant, alexalbon and others
ynusername look who came to visit
lilymhe booooo bring me next time ↳ ynusername you're welcome whenever, he invited himself ↳ logansargeant literally not true you asked me to come ↳ ynusername stop lying! i wanted thanksgiving but you have this job that makes you fly across the world to drive a stupid car or something
oscarpiastri look at him jumping for joy for you ↳ ynusername yeah well, what can i say, I'm a dream come true
bsfinstagram ahhhh just under 2 weeks until you come home!! ↳ ynusername I missed you so much ↳ bsfinstagram debrief over wine incoming!
username18 nope she is definitely dating this driver ↳ username19 it's so weird cause like if she really broke up with christian because of distance then isn't this just so much worse ↳ username20 i don't think they broke up just because of distance, things were probably weird for a couple of months before hand cause she wasn't going to as many mens games, she was definitely going to the women's games though.
timothyweah did you get a hotdog from the hotdog guy? ↳ ynusername yes... why? ↳ timothyweah cause they're good and i just want to make sure that you did ↳ ynusername okay timmy
chelseafcw don't stay too long we miss you ↳ ynusername aww, i miss you guys too
May 2024 ynusername posted--------
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others
ynusername Miami you can be pretty but you're on my shit list
landonorris no whyyyyy ↳ ynusername idk might have something to do with my boyfriend dnfing at his home race. ↳ landonorris oh, okay ↳ ynusername but i guess congrats on your win ↳ landonorris thanks ynnnnn! ↳ oscarpiastri someone is still drunk
logansargeant ohhh he's handsome ↳ ynusername yeah and he's got a jealous ass girlfriend so beware ↳ logansargeant love you too babe
username23 finally confirmed that they're dating only seven months later
#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant smau#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#read#logan sargeant x fem!reader#logan sargeant#christian pulisic x ex!reader#my ex is a footballer series#danielle writes
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Catching Feelings - Mattheo x Reader
A/N: not sure how I feel about this one, but I decided to post it anyways haha.
Prompt: “What part of I want you, and only you, do you not understand?” “And what part of why would you? Don’t you not understand?”
It had started out a casual hook up. Snog in a deserted hallway. Some over the clothing petting in the dungeons. Sneaking around in the Astronomy Tower for some no pants fun. It was great for you and Mattheo. The thrills and fun without the attachments a relationship entailed.
Well it had been great. Until Mattheo started to act weird, both with his words and wanting more time with you. Even when no pants time seemed to take a while to get too. He would make small talk, while you were the one to undo his tie and unbutton his shirt. And when he grasped your hands, halting what you were wanting to get too. That was it.
“Forget it" you sighed in frustration, grabbing your discarded cardigan before taking off back to the Slytherin common room.
He called out to stop you, tried to persuade you to stay. But it was no use, you were gone. And Mattheo sat there frustrated in more ways than one. For he physically wanted you, the evidence in his pants making it obvious. But he was also emotionally attached to you. Wanting to be around you, talk to you, hold you, kiss you. The guy was enthralled with you, bewitched mind and body. He wasn't quiet at soul, but part of him thought you were kindred spirits.
The following few days you avoided him. Keeping to yourself and always with a friend. And that was pissing Mattheo off. No to mention having this time to think clearly, Mattheo realised that what had been fun, looks to have turned into him liking you. And he now wasn't just mad with you, but also himself. For Mattheo Riddle doesn't catch feelings. He isn't meant to be a one girl kind of guy. Yet, he was willing to try it with you.
Getting a chance, though a sliver of one, you had just walked out of the female's lavatory. Grabbing your arm, Mattheo dragged you into a deserted hall, away from anyone or any noise. Once it sunk in to who had grabbed you, you yanked your arm from their hold.
“What the Hell Mattheo!?” You whispered yelled, glaring daggers at the male before you.
The male in questioned, did his best to look unfazed. Yet wondered if you had felt the sweat on his hands, or hear how his heart was racing. Could you see through his act? For he felt there were chips in the mask on his face.
“Why have you been avoiding me?” He asked with as flat a voice he could.
You looked at him for a moment, before sighing and crossing your arms over your chest. “Really? This is why you kidnapped me".
“I didn't kidnap you. I dragged you. You're free to leave anytime" he retorted with a soft glare.
“Fine" was all you said, moving to walk back the way you had come.
With two steps Mattheo moved to block you. Sputtering out a bunch of words that even he didn’t understand. But after he took a second to un-jumble his thoughts. Mattheo explained that he had only wanted to talk, and give him five minutes. You mulled it out before saying, alright I'll give you five minutes.
“Why have you been avoiding me (Y/N/N)? I waited in the Astronomy Tower the other night, but you didn't show up...” the last part came out a little whiny, which made Mattheo cringe.
Again you sighed. “I don't know...maybe I thought you'd want to talk" you replied dropping your bag on a bench, looking over the bust of some old witch.
“What's so wrong with talking...?” Mattheo asked quietly.
You shot him a are you serious look. “I thought this" – you gestured between you both – “was casual. In other words, no talking or attachment".
Mattheo straightened up, “well...ah, yeah?”
“Really?” You stared him down, not buying his words.
Mattheo sighed. He couldn't deny it further, could he?
“Look Mattheo, it's best we end it here. Cut our losses, yeah?” You finally said, voice void of emotion.
You grabbed your bag, slinging it over your shoulder. You walked past him and patted him on the back. Sharing some last parting words with the Slytherin male. When you were done, and no response from Mattheo, you began to head back to the populated halls.
As if being struck by lightening, Mattheo shot around, eyes wide watching your retreating form. “I like you!” He blurted out.
You paused, about to round the corner. You stood there for a minute, which had Mattheo thinking you may not have heard him. Finally you slowly turned around, eyes drawn together in confusion. Slowly you moved back to him, yet kept some distance between you both.
“Come again?” You finally croaked out.
Mattheo fidgeted from foot too foot, gaze looking anywhere but at you. He felt like a child that was in trouble. “I said...I like you...”
Slowly you nodded. “That's what I thought you said", you paused for a moment to think over your next lot of words carefully. “Look, Mattheo...I'm not the girl for you. I am uncaring, mouthy and too smart for the good of anyone”.
“That's fine with me" he replied quickly, staring you in the eyes.
You sighed. “Why would you? You can do better then me".
And with that you turned and began to walk off once more. Again Mattheo called out to you, sputtering out for you to stop or wait, and other things. But this time you didn't let up. Which lead to Mattheo being hot on your heels. Thankfully no students were around, but you could hear them in the distance.
“What part of I want you, and only you, do you not understand?” Mattheo called, anger rising when his attempts to get you to talk to him failed.
Finally you stopped, turning around to glare at the male. “And what part of why would you? Don’t you not understand?” was your retort.
The sound that came out of Mattheo's mouth was a cross between a cry of frustration and anguish of pain. Gripping his hair, he noted how you were so frustrating. Why wouldn’t you want him? Was there someone else you wanted to be with? If so, who, so he could take care of them. Was he ugly? Both physically and personality wise? His mind was swimming with questions.
“Mattheo...” you said softly, grabbing his attention. “This, you and me wouldn't work. And you know that. We're too different. Let's just...let it be".
When you got no response from Mattheo, you took that as your cue to leave. And off you went. While Mattheo stood there. Crushed, but determined. Determined to win you over. He believe part of you had to feel the same, or partially at least. Maybe you were scared, he liked to tell himself. Yes, that's what he was going with. And he would get you. No matter what or the cost.
#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo x reader#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x fem!reader
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Mignon's Halloween
Barcelona Femení x Teen!Reader
Summary: The eleventh of my Halloween-centric fics
It's Jana that finds the headline first. It's Jana who opens her phone one day on camp to see it trending.
'Barcelona Superstar to Return to her Childhood Club?'
With her contract running out in the summer, question marks over whether young French star y/n l/n will stay at Barcelona remain but eagle eyed fans think they've solved the mystery.
In a recent TikTok posted on her girlfriend's account, the young star seems to have been pictured wearing her old Olympique Lyonnais jersey.
Click Read More below to see what our experts think of this startling discovery:
It's Jana that slides her phone over to Alexia at breakfast. It's Jana who has to explain that the site looks kind of sketchy and it likely isn't true.
But then you start posting things while you're away on camp with France.
Most of it is harmless stuff. The kind of stuff Alexia expects from a teenager back in their home country - a few harmless pranks on your teammates, a picture of you and your parents, a cute video of you kissing your girlfriend's cheek.
But then there's a random selfie of you in your childhood bedroom.
You're relaxed back on your pillows, your family dog laying on your chest.
His snout is covering the emblem over your heart but Alexia can recognise a Lyon jersey anywhere.
That's when she gets a bit worried.
You left Lyon because you wanted game time they wouldn't give you. You'd pushed a bit too hard for game time and they'd told you they weren't going to renew your contract.
Surely you wouldn't go back to them now.
Surely even if they begged and begged and begged, you'd hold yourself in a high enough regard that you wouldn't go back to them.
But the Lyon shirt pops up a few more times while you're away.
There's even a video of your girlfriend wearing one of your old jerseys as she walks her own dog.
"Don't tell me you're stalking the girlfriend now," Mapi gripes as Alexia stares down at her phone," The kids can have fun without you hovering over them."
"I'm not stalking anyone!"
"You haven't even met her girlfriend yet you follow her on every bit of social media you can find her on."
"That's for safety. I'm making sure she's a good one."
"I think y/n is capable of choosing her own girlfriend."
Alexia makes a face and Mapi corrects herself.
"I think y/n's parents are capable of approving a good girlfriend. Don't be so worried."
"That's not what I'm worried about," Alexia mutters, looking up from her phone when you finally walk in with Vicky.
The both of you are speaking in hushed whispers, giggling to yourselves until you both split off to go to your own cubbies.
Back when Lucy still played with the team, your cubby used to be next to hers but now that she's gone back to England, you've been moved next to Alexia so she can keep an eye on you.
"So," She says, trying to be as casual as she can," How was camp?"
You give her an odd look. "Yeah it was alright. But you know that already. Because you're a stalker."
"Why does everyone think I'm a stalker?!"
"You follow my girlfriend on all your social media. You didn't even create a fake account."
"Fake account? What's that?"
You smile at her, the same smile that Vicky does at camp when Alexia tries to show off one of those dances from TikTok that she knows young people like.
"Don't worry about it." You pull on your training shirt. "Is the Halloween party thing still on for tonight?"
"Yes, why?"
"Just checking. I might be a little late though. I've got a meeting with my agent."
Alexia tries to make it seem like she's not all that interested in it but she isn't quite sure it works. "Oh? What about?"
"Just contract stuff. I'm going to head off with Vicky before training," You say," We're going to see if we can break into the vending machine again."
Normally, Alexia would try to stop you but her eyes catch on the familiar white of the Lyon shirt you have stuffed in your bag.
The sinking feeling in Alexia's chest returns in full force, staying with her for most of the day to the point that she finds herself glancing at you much more than she usually does.
"She's not going to just up and leave," Patri says that evening at the Halloween party," She loves it here."
"She had Lucy here with her," Alexia points out," They spoke French together. None of us speak French. What if she misses speaking French?"
Irene rolls her eyes, slightly preoccupied with making sure that her son isn't eating all of the sweets that Marta has been spoiling him with. "She calls her parents regularly. She calls her girlfriend. And I can speak French. She's not been missing the French language in the slightest."
"But what if-"
"If she's leaving us," Marta says, reaching across the table to give Matteo another skittle," Then it won't be for Lyon."
Alexia finds it kind of hard to believe Marta when she's dressed in an inflatable pig costume.
"She's meeting with her agent and-"
"And she's here," Patri interrupts, chin jerking towards the door that you've just slipped in through.
"She's wearing it!" Alexia hisses, heart thumping in her chest," The Lyon shirt! She's wearing it! This is it. This is it. She's leaving us."
"No way!" Vicky laughs from across the room," You actually did it?"
You grin back at her, showing off your ripped shirt. "I think Laporta thought I was crazy when I pulled out the scissors and the lighter. What do you think? Do I look axe-murderer victim enough?"
"Do you mind if we add blood?" Vicky asks.
"You have fake blood? You should have led with that!"
You and Vicky barely take a moment to look at the congregation of captains at the table before you're pouring blood all over your head and shirt, really rubbing it all over the white fabric.
Alexia's mouth hangs up just as Jana's phone chimes with a notification from the Barcelona Femení account.
Happy Halloween Culers!
FRENCH SUPERSTAR HERE TO STAY! Find out more below!⬇️
#woso x reader#barcelona femeni x reader#barca femeni x reader#barcelona femeni#barca femeni#woso community#woso imagine#woso fanfics#woso
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