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#idk why I’m so hard on myself
cali-kabi · 2 months
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~ made another magic au Kirby drawing this is mostly about Sword and Blade :D🌊💎🔥I also wanted to draw the GSA members again xD🌟like the GSA members, Sword and Blade have magic too but they receive theirs at a certain temples of some sorts while the GSA members learnt theirs on their own ^^
💫Sword Knight has water magic and can create magic water wings like Sir Dragato’s. Unlike Dragato, Sword can turn himself invisible with his water magic while Dragato can’t. He’s more calm than Blade Knight and takes stuff more seriously than him, he’s the one who avoids getting himself into trouble.
🌟Blade Knight has fire magic and create fiery wings just like Sir Falspar’s. His hair can sometime change color depending on his feelings. Blade is a bit sassy he can tease Sword for absolutely no reason it’s funny xD sometimes he gets himself into trouble. He and Mace Knight sometimes even hoard hide food in the battleship Halberd all for themselves and this makes Captain Vul mad xD
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stuckinapril · 9 months
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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danothan · 10 months
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tough pill i have to swallow is realizing that “getting better” doesn’t mean “getting to do more things,” getting better for me means taking better initiative in protecting myself. and THAT means making sure i do LESS things
#sounds kinda obvious but i only just realized it lmao#feels like i have to grieve a lot of my goals now but no one said the healing process would be easy#danbles#and for anyone else that has a disability that prevents them from doing smth#or trauma that makes certain triggers limit their opportunities#or neurotypes that make it harder for them to love smth like they used to#or whatever else#i don’t want to make it sound like you have to give up on the things that make you happy#I’M certainly not going to#but a huge value of mine has always been experiencing everything life had to offer#and everytime that backfires (whether it’s burnout; triggering a flashback; triggering an episode; putting strain on my body; etc)#i always just thought to myself ‘it was bad timing’ or ‘i haven’t gotten better yet’ bc the endgoal was to always get to that point where#i could experience it. i want to try new things all the time. i want to feel normal and be included in everything#but if smth keeps Making Me Feel Bad then maybe there isn’t a version of myself that can take it on#it’s not resilience to put yourself in harm’s way#idk how well i’ll be able to put this into practice tbh. i rly rly like exploring different experiences#even negative ones are valuable to me#but the least i can do for myself is recognize that i might not always be the problem#maybe i’ve already hit the limit on all the self-work i can do. maybe it’s the environment or situation itself that’s the problem#fuuck guys ​i feel like i’m going thru a stage of grief here why is this shit so hard 💀
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chialattea · 6 months
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Nami WIP + some chibi doodles heheeee
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kimetsu-chan · 13 days
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I’m gonna be out most of the day bc I’ll be helping my dad with a big shopping trip plus being out after, so I’m going to be super duper exhausted
I don’t do well in crowded or loud places in the slightest, I get woozy and tired and I feel miserable or like I’m gonna pass out, and if the shopping isn’t gonna make me wanna cry, the outing after will bc it’s gonna be packed with lots of noise and people
I don’t say this because I want to complain, I just wanna give a super quick warning that I might not be active tomorrow as well as today bc when I get exhausted, my mental health tends to decline as well ;-;
so- a bit of a warning that I may poof a bit (sorry! 😣)
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faecaptainofdreams · 2 months
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Oh my god, just work on your art, Fae. Just work on your fucking art. You have so many things ready to edit and they’re not even that difficult, literally just sit on your ass and work on it. Work on the art, Fae. Do it! Work on the fucking ART! JUUUST!!! DO IT!!!
WORK ON THE FUCKING ART, FAE!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
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rosicheeks · 1 year
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Would you (could you) grant us the honor and privilege of a pic of your wondrously angelic smile?
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j-esbian · 25 days
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i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.
that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.
weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.
#most of it is stuff i can’t help like!!!#coworkers and i don’t share a lot of interests so i’m always like. yes i’ve heard of that show but haven’t seen it. no idk that band sorry#and they’ll like. talk shit abt other people who share my interests without realizing that i also like those things#so i just have to sit there and take it#i feel like i don’t have a lot in common with my friends even. a few shared interests but very different lives#in my experience the conscious choice has been to try to keep up with what’s popular but it’s just. not interesting to me#i got bored and forgot to finish s2 of stranger things and never picked it back up#even alt subcultures have gone kinda mainstream and i never quite slot in#let’s not even touch the gay culture ‘flags’ that are extremely online and unrelatablr#and the most frustrating thing. every time i try to talk about myself and my interests i feel people shutting down#one person i know. open mouth sighs in exasperation when i open my mouth#i don’t know why you’re making it my problem that we’re different#i know there is supposed to be a niche out there for everyone but some of that feels like#those niches are falling prey to marketability. if you’re too far out of the mainstream. too out of touch. it can’t be helped#a lot of messaging online is like. embrace weirdness but only if it’s subversive in a very specific way#too normal to hang out with self-proclaimed proud weirdos. too weird to hang out with normies#like i thought the thing was to disavow performativity. i’m sorry i don’t find the same things interesting#i don’t care about the office and you don’t care about the hundred years’ war. that’s fine. why is that seen as a personal fault of mine#i feel like some of the reaction i get might be bc it comes across as hipster shit. idk#i’m literally just oblivious and looking for any kind of indicator for social interaction#but so often it feels like the onus of finding common ground is on me. i have to listen abt things idk but no one cares what i have to say#i think what makes it more frustrating is this reaction from people who claim to not care. do their own thing#and then get annoyed when i do mine and it’s. different#instead of being like ‘fuck the mainstream! conformity is bullshit! be yourself!’ it’s like#‘fuck the mainstream because it doesn’t appeal to me personally and i’ve made my own club!’#and this is not going to come out right because i’m just at my limit and venting and don’t know how to say things the right way#so people don’t misunderstand me#i just happen to never like the Right Things and know the Right Things and act the Right Way and idk how else to say it other than#can we be more normal about weird people#idk it’s hard to talk abt this without sounding like i’m just complaining but i’m more bewildered and trying to state things as i see them
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tchaikovskaya · 5 months
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🫠
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fellshish · 10 months
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ifyoucandaniel · 1 year
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Okay so, I went ahead and bought an iPad to try digital art for the first time, and my first attempt was shit. I went too far outside my comfort zone and fucked it up BUT!!! I am happy to report I've finished my first official piece! Not sure if any of you have seen those racing au wolfstar/jegulus TikTok’s, but I was inspired to give it a go and did Remus as a street racer (I was only thinking about Ronan lynch the entire time)
For the love of GOD do not look at his helmet or clothes
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gays4vulo · 18 days
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I feel such joy to know ppl & hear them share things with me. Looooove having friends and picking their brains, I really should do it more often than I do now tbh
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one of the worst feelings ever is wanting to write but your hands hurt too much or the words just don’t want to work so you just sit there staring at a half finished doc with tears in your eyes bc you want to write and you need to write but everything is telling you that you can’t
#and that you’re a terrible writer and that no one cares aaaaaaand imposter syndrome kicks in and you just feel like crap#bc all your friends have been wriying recejtky so why can’t you??? cause they’re bETTER THAN YOU#lol idk why my head is so bad today#the feelings of inferiority and emptiness and idk worthlessness are strong and i hate it but i can’t stop it#i just wanna write!!! and like what i write!!!#but i Can’t and i haven’t liked anything i’ve written in Months and ugh i hate not being able to d something i wanna do#oh and now i’m crying??? why the frick am i cRYING litetally why is typing this making me Worse#sorry guys needed to rant#the inadequacy was strong today#something something students keep telling me how much they dislike me or how i’m whiny for asking them to be respectful and like#i Know i shouldn’t compare myself to my friends but gosh it’s hard when they’re all like. so much better than me.#and i don’t have a lot of time to be on tumblr bc of work so i just feel like i’m watching everything from afar and it’s no one’s fault but#my brain’s like no one is Doing anything it’s just my brain being dumb and i can’t stand it and I want to stop feeling empty and like i’m#missing a part of myself and like the words i write don’t matter gOD why can’t i just feel happy with where i am and not care what the kids#who hate me say or realize that no one cares that i’m not on much like i’m still Here and trying to interact it’s not like everyone hates me#for being busy or for liking side characters more than the main characters and just—#sorry#that felt good actually#idk what came over me#imma just. imma shower. then maybe delete my tags#sorry if anyone got this far aT ALL grace is either asleep or trying to sleep so i don’t wanna bother them since they slept poorly last nigh#okay done now for real sorry delete tags later sorry if you saw this and how freaking messed up ky freaking brain is
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stardust-sunset · 21 days
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can my history teacher please shut the fuck up i get it’s a college class!! i get that! you don’t need to keep telling me i’m gonna fail!!
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lesbiansanemi · 7 months
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I should be getting paid to deal with this bullshit
#fandom lesbophobia and misogyny tied in with the PETTIEST discord drama blown so far out of proportion. dawg…#‘pls explain idk how we were lesbophobic uwu’#idk you attacked a bunch of sapphics and said they were transphobic and biphobic which then spiraled into spreading rumors about them being#abusive and alcoholics and calling them slurs#because they made ‘I hate men’ jokes and didn’t like your dumbass m/f ships and headcanoned a character a lesbian lmfao#also because one of them was supposedly transphobic on a VC but the apparent victim doesn’t even remember it like LMFAO?????#which is crazy considering most of them are not cis and are also bi themselves lmfao#which I EXPLAINED#but it’s still ‘idk how we were lesbophobic a day misogynistic pls explain’#I’m killing myself this is so stupid#like do you think I’m dumb. do you think I’m stupid#this is batshit#this is why I don’t do fandom discord servers yall are insaaaaaane#idk what’s worse#if this was done knowingly and we’re just playing dumb#or if we actually ARE this dumb and don’t think any of this was rooted in lesbophobia#which had been perpetuated SO hard in the more standard fandom lesbophobia and misogyny ways#not to mention the transmisogyny but I won’t get into that…. lmao#anyways#every day I wake up to more DMs and I want to SCREAM#I just wanna peacefully go into work and live my life man it is NOT my job to coddle you#because you got caught being shitty lmfao#fuck off#kaz rambles
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otrtbs · 2 years
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meeting w my prof in 15 minutes to talk about a thing that i know nothing about so everyone send good vibes my way or else
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