#idk what else to tag. i dont wanna trigger anyone

[n4talia-chaparro]

TW: crappy lyrics that I wrote, cringy AU, trauma theme, idk what to put here. Don't say I didn't warn yall.

Anyways, some shitty artworks I made out of COMFORT. I wasn't feeling well and thought it would be a good idea to write lyrics for the first time. I've been wanting to experiment with new things. Don't worry, I'm okay and better now.

Just ignore these. drawing and having this AU are the only things that bring me comfort. 🚶

[celestialmancer]

⛈️ ❌ ❌ ❌ // 2:09 am, tbd ;

[thenexuscollective]

Hey uh, we just wanted to offer some support to y'all.

We struggled a bit with that vent post (both with understanding exactly what you meant and also having feelings about it) but because of that we did just... scroll past.

I think what's important is that we are all against bigotry and for inclusion and liberation of ALL plurals, and like... it can be hard in a community when there's so much focus on the cruelty (whether it's coming from inside or outside the community), even if the focus on it is for the purpose of fighting it.

You're allowed to have big feelings about it, you're allowed to struggle to articulate them (idk if you feel like that's what's going on, just adding it in case since it's often something we need to hear), and you're allowed to express it in ways that aren't always perfect and may be messy.

We're still not sure we fully understand the vent post, but we don't have to in order to support you. Our inbox is open (well, not sure what the settings are, but send us an ask if you wanna talk and we can message you in any case) and if you want a nonjudgmental ear to vent to, we're here.

You're welcome to publish this OR answer it privately OR not answer it at all, we just wanted to offer some reassurance since like, it seems like you're having a hard time and could use some support.

We hope things get easier. <2

(Also I hope we worded this well, we're very worried about unintentionally coming off like an asshole despite trying our hardest not to because tone in text is really freaking hard! 😅)

umh. dang we entirely missed that ask. when did ya send it? also do you have us blocked?? because we can't access your account at all./gen srs info gq nm just confused

also for the record, that vent post was NOT supposed to get that much traction, or be seen at all. the only reason we tagged this as syscourse was for people to be able to block the negativity since that/these specific topic(s) are often triggering for a lot of people in the community, ironically including ourselves./srs

so like, frankly, no offense, none of us really cares what feelings that brought to anyone. it wasn't supposed to be a MESSAGE to anyone, let alone be perceived that much (although in hindsight, we don't regret it that it was). and we don't know if the feelings you're talking about are good or bad (we can't really understand your tone here, plus you left out some context/info), but regardless this was NOT the goal of that post. that post frankly wasn't meant for anything else than for one or some of us letting some thoughts out at i-dont-know-how-late in the morning while being sick and bottled up feelings rose from the pressure of outerbody life events and personal issues affecting many individuals within the system. so if you saw this post and got feelings from it (especially if neg), we're sincerely sorry/gen, since that was not what it was meant for/, but that is on you./srs

Also thanks for the kind gesture (if it was one?), but we have no way to contact you since your account is probably either deactivated or have us blocked(?). Honestly this is far from the first time with us dealing with anything related to that, we've been in (distant) contact with the community since years and way before officially joining tumblr. So these are thoughts, opinions, and emotions cumulated from a lot of experiences (often neg in context of syscourse). But we appreciate positivity whenever we see it <3 /gen

[thecherrygod]

/

[cupcraft]

I guess since there are new tumblr users, esp in mcyt/dsmp/etc, I wanna add some of my own advice besides the change your pfp and reblog stuff (though i'll add onto this).

1. Reblog art AND writing/fanfic AND analysis posts if you liked them! This is is how things are boosted algorithmically.

2. I'm sure you've seen posts about tags and how they work objectively, but on another note definitely feel free to rant/talk in the tags. I and many people read those tags especially in response to writing/art/analysis/etc. and its like a "comment" basically and its always fun to see what ppl think (ik i always read the tags). This is especially true when replies are off.

3. Lots of people have a block and move on policy. If you interact and break a DNI list/are weird/op just doesnt want you to interact you'll just be blocked. This will appear as being unable to follow someone or sort of a loading error on a blog when you try to open it.

4. Ask boxes are great ways to communicate with people but like tags and in general dont be weird, even on anon you can be blocked.

5. Especially in fandom it is always good to curate your own experience. Block tags and posts you dont want to see or cannot see. And if something is triggering always feel free to reach out to a poster to see if they'll tag that (i know i will if asked if needed! I often put "ask to tag" to indicate I recognize this may need tw/cw tags but idk what).

6. Tumblr has a lot of yearly and weekly traditions that are celebrated for fun you may notice. Like Ides of March memes, mishapocalypse is still a thing in my experience, neil banging out the tunes, and etc.

Mutuals and anyone else can add on. These are just things i wanted to mention!

[winterywitch]

heya !! im sure you didnt mean this in a mean way, but keep in mind that there are lots of autistic ppl that like to talk and infodump abt their special interests and can often get caught up in our own heads and not realise that we're not letting anyone else get a word in edgeways so you kinda have to gently prod us to let you speak, but. yea i just wanted to let u know abt that side of things as well !

as someone whos on the spectrum and like, ALL of my friends are also on the spectrum, i totally get that trust me @_@ and being an abuse survivor makes it 20x harder to actually get a word in, because im already groomed into sitting, listening, letting people trample over me and Being A Good Child for other people

for me this is less “those mean selfish autistics” and more just, this is how my neuroses clash with other peoples’ sometimes… like im on the spectrum but i was also conditioned from a very young age to be EXTREMELY hyper-aware of myself and hyper-aware to the point of basically being an empath with regards to other people too

like the proverbial They need to be let know clearly, verbally, that theyre kinda hogging the conversation space, and the proverbial Me needs to be allowed extra conversation space and be coaxed out of my shell very verbally and clearly and it sucks because its hard to make sure both parties get what they need but ofc its doable, i make it work all the time.

its just frustrating that this is a pattern for me not even rly with my loved ones but just, random people flock to me and see me as this person they can just do that with, and i dont have the courage inside me OR the outside encouragement to let them know i kind of want to talk to and i want MY interests and things to be treated with importance too, and historically most of them in my past were not even autistic, the most impressionable cases were just assholes who only cared about themselves which adds to the immediately defensive, resentful feeling i get about it

idk if this makes sense but like, that is absolutely an aspect i try to be aware of since its so present in my personal life, i know that in a lot of cases ppl just are not meaning to do this and have nothing but good intentions it just sucks not being this sort of person who can get what i need anyway, my first instinct is to kneel and let people do whatever they want

[fairycosmos]

hi chloe im having like a little mental breakdown lol like my anxiety is so bad that i want to hide in a corner for the next 5 years. and all because i called my mom and she got slightly irritated over nothing so i just hung up on her because i started crying. aaand now i feel like a sensitive little bitch because every time she sounds even slightly mad i just shutdown or start to cry and i guess thats because when i was younger or until i moved out she yelled at me, threw things and threatened me a lot so now i cant handle that but i feel so stupid and immature about it ugh idk and ive been clean from selfharm for almost 6 months but this is really pushing me to stupid shit because that always how i handled it as a kid

angellll :( im so sorry to hear this. i know it won't actually do much to change how awful youre feeling rn but i want to sincerely say that you're NOT being overly sensitive. decades of abuse and mistreatment especially during your formative years can make it very difficult to communicate with your parents and all the blame falls on them over it, i promise. it's not easy to let go of a lifetime of having to be hyper aware of their voice tone and attitude in order to keep yourself physically and emotionally safe. i am so sorry and it is NOT your fault. youre having a very normal human reaction to being hurt. it's completely understandable if you need to have a cry and break down a little while the worst of this washes over you. let it happen, but dont try to hold onto it either. it is going to pass and i am so proud of you for getting through it. you are not stupid or immature, you're a person with feelings and you deserve better than what you've had to put up with.

i understand that self harm is addictive and can become a habit and a go-to, i totally get you. at the same time, i really want you to know that six months clean is incredibe and it definitively proves that you do NOT need to engage in it in order to cope. relapse can be a part of recovery of course, but it's so important to try and focus on the fact that you dont deserve to harm yourself over somebody elses words and actions (or at all, over anything, ever.) is there anything at all you usually do that helps you get through the urge without self harming? im talking anything - sobbing, screaming into a pillow, talking to your friends/a trusted family member, journaling, going for a walk, holding ice cubes, breathing exercises, calling a mental health hotline, watching a comfort show. i wanna make it clear that im not saying these simple tasks are solutions to your very heavy and clearly complex situation, and i dont want to undermine it in any way. theyre just little techniques that can be used to help you get through the day, or even the hour or the moment. your brain will probably try to do all it can to convince you that these things are pointless but honestly, even just removing yourself from the vicinity of potentially harmful objects and giving yourself space to breathe and recalibrate and regain perspective can do wonders. if you regularly see a therapist or a mental health professional, i really recommend letting them know what happened so you have the opportunity to talk through and process your feelings, and maybe come up with a care plan to stop this recurring at least to this extent in the future. your mam is a dickhead and you dont need anyones permission to process pain. im sending you so much love and i really hope you're able to nurse yourself through this one step at a time. take care ok x

*so sorry i can't currently tag trigger warnings but i will asap

https://www.northpointrecovery.com/blog/let-the-healing-begin-11-tips-to-overcoming-emotional-abuse/

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-harm/helping-yourself-now/

[q-u-a-c-k]

rant that you can just skip over 😂 it's just detailed intrusive thoughts. and I'm continuing to rant about literally everything that goes through my brain so I am here writing this and not acting on thoughts or being stupid.

okay so this is a note from after I have written all that. and basically it's complaining and ranting about everything and hyperfixating on space and science in the end. in the middle I talk about my fears of love 😂 potentially triggering stuff? it's all nonsense you really dont have to read it. it was just to keep myself from doing something I shouldn't. so if you could be triggered by literally anything maybe dont? idk. I cant stop you but it's probably annoying and not interesting. if anyone does read it though let me know if I need to tag it anything.

So my brain has now decided that because there is no way I am sleeping tonight unless it's exhaustion, I get intrusive thoughts. fun! so rn it has been fixated on the fact that because I am closest to the outside. not hall door. that I could easily sneak out. which is very much not good idea, because 1) I dont live in this area, 2) it's still cold as fuck outside at night, 3) I would literally fucking get lost or caught immediately. So yeah :) I dont even know what I would do if I did go and I don't want to because I have an idea of what brain would say and that's a big no. it's especially big no because I'm too comfortable with the idea of it but I'm not allowed to. and I guess now it's kinda good because brain is thinking about how I miss my cat. I just wanna see my baby and be in my safe place with the people I'm actually comfortable with (cat and phone with online friends) like guys he's so fuckung adorable and what if he doesnt know why I'm not there right now. usually he sleeps in my room at night. so what if he's in my room waiting for me and I cant go see him. you're damn right that I'm crying about this. i just want my baby because he is my baby and an indicator of a safe place.

also I am so incredibly fucking uncomfortable. like I cannot sleep because 1) in a place I do not know 2) there are people (family) in the room that I am not comfortable letting my guard down around 3) there's so much noise from snoring (and from one sleep talking) 4) I am on the couch because when we go places I'm always the one who has to and it's a shitty pull out bed couch. it makes way too much noise that I have been in an uncomfortable position for over 3 hours because I dint want to disturb anyone else. and I can very easily feel like of the metal bars under the middle of my back 5) I am very cold. I forgot a blanket and I didnt get one because the room only gave us one extra one (I dont think we're supposed to have an extra person) ad my sister got it even though I'm the one by the outsid,door, window, and air conditioner which wont turn off. I at least have my flannel though to cover my legs 6) my head hurts so bad because it's the kind of headache that hurts to have eyes open, breath, or move around in general 7) my stomach hurts so bad because I had to eat because apparently people get hungry and are supposed to eat along with anxiety from literally all of this 8) I have not gotten to be alone for more than 10 minutes since the middle of Wednesday whereas usually I spend almsot all of my time alone (with cat and phone with online friends) in my safe place. 9) I have not stopped crying (not really like crying crying but like there has been tears or water from my eyes because for some reason they burn and some because of anxiety or missing cat. 10) I keep thinking that at any moment I close my eyes someone is going to break into the room or one of my family members are gonna do something (I literally dont know what, that's intrusive thoughts talking but I have previously freaked out because I thought they were gonna aliven't me for no reason) 11) When I'm somewhere I'm not used to I get really bad muscle cramps in my arms and legs and I am not having fun with that.

sorry that was a shit ton of complaining that nobody should have read or give a shit about. so sorry if anyone actually read that?

also Allison, if you actually do read this (istg you really dont have to. like I said this is just my train of thoughts written to prevent me from doing anything. I am not watching wandavision until later today 😂 and I am staying off the discord server I joined becuas of potential spoilers.

anyways continuation of rants and complaints. I really want to put the phone down and attempt to sleep even though I know I'm not gonna be able to and for that reason I have to write here because I do not trust myself with my brain being like this rn. but I wanna put phone down so bad because my eyes hurt and my head hurts from having eyes open.

and I really wanna just get my earbuds out and have controlled noise and potentially fall asleep but that would take noise louder than them to drown them out but any noise already is hurting my head and earbuds sound really uncomfortable right now.

also I'm starting to get really cold again because the flannel was working for a little but I think that was because I had to move a little bit to get it out and on my legs and I haven't been moving.

also my sister (sleep.talker) has been just making noises and mumbling all night except just now she went "eww" and rolled over and continued snoring and sleeping. so that's fun. totally didnt scare me.

oh my God it's fuckung almost 3:30 I just wanna sleep. at this rate I dont care in what way it happens, but I want sleep in the next 10 minutes so I cannot be aware of how uncomfortable or in pain I am.

my back (which usually already has back pain) connot stand to lay on the bar in this position anymore so I have to move but it's so loud and I dont wanna wake anyone up or move into a worse position but feel bad for moving.

I have now moved and I dont THINK I woken anyone up. back is better but head hurts so much more now because of movement and I am now laying on my knee which I have a lot of problems with and am not having a fun time.

idk what to talk about. I want sleep or to at least put phone down but like I said multiple times I do not trust my brain rn so I have to keep writing stuff. and I dont want to just keep complaining but idk what to talk about and complaining is easiest rn because I was out in an uncomfortable situation by coming with them and I didnt want to in the first place but would not be able to stay home.

I am now gonna talk about sleep and my thoughts about it. I like being asleep but I also dont. I like being not awake but most of the time do not like the dreams I have. but sleep itself is such an interesting concept. like the body forces itself to shut down and put you unconscious to like rest itself or repair before continuing to function. and it's like (supposed to be) on a specific or close to schedule. like youre supoosed to have a schedule for when you're unconscious. and this is completely normal. a part of our society is actually shaped around this too? like at certain times around the world it gets all dark and the world goes quiet for a while. idk I just think it's really interesting. maybe it's not idk lmao.

and now brain wants to talk about how and why I am afraid to love. :). brain is afraid to love because that means I have to be vulnerable to someone and that's just so terrifying to do, especially being someone who is different than a lot of the heteronormative society. like I absolutely love my friends. and once I'm comfortable around them, I'm gonna tell them that I love them as much as I can (but also dont want to make them uncomfortable). because if I finally feel comfortable enough around you to be vulnerable and accept that I love you despite brain's overwhelming urge to say I don't and be invulnerable and safe, I'm gonna tell you that as much as I can that I love you. because it literally happens so little in my life that I actually really trust someone. so if I tell you I love you I mean it (and it tells you I trust you). like seriously, I barely even say it to my mom because I'm so on guard and trying to watch my back around her. and I dont think I say it to the rest of my family. unless it's my grandparents I'm gonna tell them that because I think I do just in a different way of your my grandparent and you're family. and I occasionally say it to my irl best friend because there's still a lot I'm on guard about because I haven't told her a lot of things so we're not as close as you'd think. but if you're reading this I have probably told you i love you. and i know Allison i tell you as much as i can because I think yyou'rethe absolute top person that I trust and love, so i try to tell you a lot. because I love you!! you're like my entire found family 😂

but now we're gonna talk about reasons why I'm terrified to be in love romantically. Because I dont think i have actually liked someone romantically or really ever be romantically interested in anyone. I have thought about it because I felt like I had to tell myself I was ( I was not). like i thought I had a crush on someone once but I think it was because I was unable to be their friend at the time that I wanted to be their friend even more. and because I never really got to pick my friends I didnt know what it was like to actually want to be friends with someone. but thinking about someone romantically I just cant really do. because I don't want to get into a romantic relationship if I don't know if I'm gonna like them romantically at all. do people like people romantically when they first go out with someone? or do they just say I kinda like this person let's try it out? because that just doesnt make sense to me and idk. and it could very well be that I'm just to young to know yet. because I still dont even know what I would want from a romantic relationship. like... Idk what there is for me to want or what's different to loving your friends besides calling them something else? and the whole having to trust that this person likes you in a specific way that you might like them before you take it far enough and get hurt because they just don't feel the same? or you're the one that's not really sure and potentially hurt someone else? I know people say it's just a risk you're gonna have to take but I dont want to take a risk like that. I dont mind being hurt from it myself but in terrified at the thought that I could potentially hurt someone because I just dint feel a certain way. and I still dont know what the difference is between friend love or romantic love to be able to judge or risk that? like seriously what is different? because I mean, maybe affection like have someone to hug or cuddle? but you could do that with friends and it should be a normal thing to have with your friends. but ig this still is a fucked up society that thinks everything has to be more than what it really is. and it just leaves people touch starved because of it. idk. maybe one day I'll figure it out, but how it's just Greek and foreign to me. idfk.

well that was fun. now it's 4 and I need something else to talk about because even if I do potentially fall alseep soon, I do not want those to be my last thoughts and possibly have dream about it (dreams for me are typically not good).

I think I see the moon. it's either a moon or a parking lot light. and I know the moon is either full or very close to full (I'm pretty sure it's just very. close) but I wish all of those lights outside were off and possibly have a new moon so I could see the stars. I love the stars so much. i love the moon, too, but right now it's very bright. but I wish I was more into astronomy and knew more about it. because that's also something that's very interesting to me is space and the stars. I wanna be someone who knows about all of the constellations. but I have a horrible memory and absolutely would not be able to remember 88 different stories. although I'd want to. even though most of them or a bunch are just Zeus being a dick. but more to the science side of the stars is so interesting to me that they're soooooo far away. like they're literally incomprehensibly far away. like I cannot comprehend how big a football field is without see one, I'm agine being able to comprehend the distance of light years? like I know we know how far it is but I'm pretty sure human minds cannot comprehend how far that ACTUALLY is. even if we know it's a LOT. and isnt it cool how we're able to know there are other planets outside of the solar system? I believe it's 4 different planets that we know of that are MORE inhabitable than earth. like better to live on. and they have either older or stronger stars that wouldn't die out as fast as our sun. although there comes the debate of if we should be able to go to them. it's a very debatable question, but I think overall the answer would be no. because humans have fucked up an entire planet, why should we be allowed to do it to another? like it realize it's literally a percent of humans that fucked it up for the rest of the planet, but humans have an inner need to have power over everyone else and other things and would stop at nothing to get what they want. humans could so easily become corrupt and destroy other planets too. it's kind of a fucked up thing to say, but I feel like maybe humans should die out with our planet. like of course it's not fair to the ones who haven't had the chance to live a life yet. but it was never fair to the other creatures humans killed for their own needs. like we have caused extinction several times. karma will get you back in the end ig. and it would be cool to know but obviously we wouldnt be able to know, if a species even smarter than humans evolved and kept the peace on earth, even as the ruling species? ruling sounds wrong but idk what else to call it. whatever we are above everything else is what they would be. but it would be so amazing to know what smarter beings are alive or could eventually live. like that's so fucking cool.

anyways I should probably try to sleep or put phone down because now brian doesnt have time to let me do anything I shouldnt. it's 4:30 😂 someone is probably gonna wake up soon because idk.

[strawbearyhoney]

tagged by @autistcs! :o)

tag 9 ppl u wanna get 2 know better!

top 3 ships: asdfghjkl i spent like 20 mins trying to answer this question its too hard, i cant think of anything,,, i mean i ship lots of stuff but im not THAT into most of them, and for the ones i am rlly into its not even that i like the ship, but more so that like the fanon version of them/the version i of them i have rewritten in my head,,, so like,,,, :)

last song: (i assume this means the last song i listened to?) idk if this counts cause it was the bg music for an animatic and not me intending to listen to it as a song, but “Oh Wonder - Waste”

last movie: (again i assume this means the last movie i watched, idk if ‘last movie’ is slang/shorthand for something else asdfghjkl) kiki’s delivery service!

currently reading: kimetsu no yaiba!!! super enjoying it. was on a long car ride so i decided to fuck around and read 85 chapters asdfghjk, then i got home and still couldnt stop reading, it was so good,,,

(also reading berserk cause my sister wanted me to but i might have to stop cause its kinda triggering to me, especially now that i know [SPOILERS])

what food are you craving right now: bbq chicharrones! also terrys chocolate orange :3

i tag (but obvi u dont have to do this if u dont wanna!): @grodyego @cacupid @assignedcatboyatbirth @triishuna @doppii @ickysmell @angelspath @softomen @haitiandaisy @yugimoto and @l2g !!! as well as anyone else that wants to do this :o)

[tinkdw]

hi tink ^_^ was wondering if you think both endgame human!cas and endgame angel!cas are both valid interpretations? im genuinely interested as I can't see the whole human!cas being a thing, and I'm open to learn more if you think that's what is actually going to happen. idk his experience as a human was miserable, i feel like maybe im missing something?? :0 u dont have to answer this if u dont want, as it may cause wank. ty

Hi!

Here’s my “overall” Cas meta from a while ago, nothing’s changed and a few other meta writers added to it so it’s a good view I think as to the whole concept:

https://tinkdw.tumblr.com/post/165781313412/why-do-you-think-cas-should-becomechoose-to-be

It’s a really crappy topic for divisiveness, in my experience the people who have, relatively, as much as possible, objectively analysed the author intent in the show have come to a pretty solid conclusion within the meta community that Human!Cas appears to be endgame based not on his experience as a human but the outcome, his overall arc since season 4 and the Chekhovs gun style flamingly blatant reminders throughout the show such as the repeated asking him if he wouldn’t rather be human, his choosing to be an Angel to go into battle powerful enough to save the people he loves and putting what he wants to one side and his clearly not wanting to be a soldier anymore.

It’s kind of like saying endgame Dean is for him to be emancipated and being able to openly watch Oprah and Disney etc even though on the surface he says he doesn’t like that stuff. Because the pretty obvious sublimation is there.

With Cas the sublimation isn’t quite as clear but it’s really all there. Yes he suffered as a human but he literally came out of it and said he missed it, while previous to being human he was curious and wanted to try human things (eg kissing meg) and afterwards we’ve seen him actively choosing to act more human, smiting less and fist fighting instead, acting more human, I mean the big one for me was when Dean asked him “and you’re okay with that?!” When he told him he got grace back to be able to fight and he just totally brushed it off saying he needed it to fight:

https://tinkdw.tumblr.com/post/171244776157/kanayaks-tinkdw-cas-i-got-my-grace-back-i

He later takes more grace which he had been previously rejecting but only to save Dean and then took his own grace back when again it’s needed for a fight whilst telling us the quote that the craziest thing a man can do is die.

He’s literally saying he’s killing himself / his wants for the greater good.

He needs grace for the fight and to be a good useful soldier and to save his family but does he want it?

Want v Need.

One of the biggest themes of the show.

Cas needs his grace to be useful when times are hard but is that what he wants?

In my opinion the show has repeatedly emphasised that it isn’t. I also think it’s clear he doesn’t want to be a soldier anymore and these things go hand in hand.

Others may use canon to say they think it is. Both interpretations are totally valid as long as they are based on canon and actually analysing the canon in a consistent manner.

The issue I have is certain people cherry picking and projecting their stories into it and claiming it’s an overall Cas’ arc since inception meta. That’s just not how meta writing works.

You can absolutely write that stuff but you can’t claim it’s objective and fully inclusive of canon and logical when it is just picking parts that fit your own desire for the character. Like, I didn’t want Lucifer to be centre stage in s13 but I didn’t just ignore it when it was.

Cherry picking things ie the one time Cas said “I just wanna be an Angel” when he was depressed, distraught at Dean’s death and wanted to stop feeling things as proof it’s what he really wants isn’t what I’d call meta writing of the whole story. That’s like saying Sam really wants to be a hunter and tag along beside his brother in the impala on the road for the rest of his life because he was a depressed, vengeful mess after Jess’ death and said ok let’s go. Is it really what Sam wants for himself and the rest of his life though? No way! That’s been clear too.

Even worse when some people claim to be bullied or triggered by other view points. Someone even screenshotted a few sentences I wrote that if you took away the top and bottom sentence looked like I was making no sense and anti Cas (me anti Cas. Lmao) but in the context obviously made sense and decided to create a wank storm about it because they didn’t like human cas meta and wanted to make me look bad. People need to grow up. This isn’t a meta discussion about interpretation it’s being a dick and being unable to contemplate another interpretation.

It makes a discussion totally impossible which moots the entire point of blogging on tumblr in the first place.

Absolutely all interpretations are valid, it’s just a case of how you pitch your interpretation. If you want to state your interpretation of a character absolutely go for it! I used to be all up for Angel!Cas meta until a few utter assholes decided to be personal and ridiculous about it. Now I don’t touch it with a barge pole. Same as M*gstiel.

But that doesn’t invalidate anyone’s good, thought out, canon analysing endgame Angel!Cas meta.

For example my own interpretation of the siren episode is different to many other meta writers, we can discuss it and have polite and great conversations without getting triggered / defensive because we aim to discuss author intent, our own interpretations and do so in a civil manner. There’s one meta writer in particular I’ve had altercations with in the past over some differences of opinion on speculative things and ways of writing meta but who I get on well with, admire and like talking to because we are adults and literally get over it.

There’s also a few people who unfortunately though I agree meta wise about things on the show have been so nasty irl to myself and others that I’ve cut them off completely.

Interpretations are interpretations until they are canon, I’m lucky that most of mine have become so or are clearly on their way but I can also be wrong ie I thought Asmodeus would be more important to character exposition than he was, life moves on. I also didn’t realise quite what it would mean that he would be a Bucklemming own concept and not really used by anyone else, I thought perhaps he’d be used by others by the wasn’t, now I have that knowledge in my pocket meta on anything that sets up for Bucklemming use is kinda meh don’t bother analysing it much it’s probably not hugely important to the overall story being told by the showrunner, ie Nick.

All interpretations are valid is very true. Eg. I can interpret Cas’ story as a metaphor for a queer kid (and in particular trans) coming from a conservative family and emancipating themselves and someone else can interpret it as an immigrants story.

If the show starts changing this then I will change my meta, because my meta is an analysis of what the show is doing, not what I want. For example I never wanted Dean to be queer representation, I was totally heteronormative and would have been totally cool with him ending up alone or with a woman, it’s the show that made me want something different for him through consistent and repeated canon blatant hints at something else. Same as Cas, I was totally ready in season 4 to just like him as a cool character and for him to bog off back to Heaven after being useful but he was captivating as an ally and it grew from there. For ages I would totally have put to one side the hints at a romantic part of his story and loved for him to become the third brother, it’s the show that made me see more between him and Dean, I never would have imagined that myself, I was a boring heterormative adult more interested in the individual characters’ stories than shipping, I thought shipping was just maritime transferral of goods before I was like wtf and googled Destiel after 10x05 cos I’d finally found a name for what I’d been seeing evolve for 6 years.

Sam goes for Cas’ own individual arc and what he wants. I never had a clue what I wanted from him until the show told me what I should want by repeating something clearly over 10 years. If they suddenly change any part of the story then they change it (and I’ll be annoyed they changed something so entrenched but I’m not going to bitch @ tptb for it or whatever, it’s their choice, they’re the creator and once it’s changed I’ll meta that) but so far it’s been the same, clear story to me for 10 years.

An interpretation is an interpretation but it’s when you start, as I do and some others do, saying you believe this one is the authors intention that you have to be more careful about backing it up with canon and logic and not getting #triggered when someone disagrees.

If you’re going to pitch it as what you believe the author intent is then you have to leave your personal projections at the door and work solely based on the canon, the production, what the author may have said outside of canon etc. It has nothing to do with your own wants for the character or show.

It also means when someone has valid canon supported arguments to the contrary you can have a really interesting discussion and I love that.

[rottenbutrecovering]

hey i just really wanna vent & i’m not mad or anything pls don’t take it that way. it’s just. i don’t understand why ppl can’t talk about their eds on their blogs, same as venting w any other mental illness. ppl can have blogs where they talk abt their ptsd, their triggers, their suicidal ideation all at length but ppl can’t talk about struggling w an ed without ppl thinking they’re “pro ana”. which is a real thing and i hate anyone pro any ed. (1/? 🍀)

and like! i have ptsd, did, and several other mental illnesses. i’m definitely one of the ppl who talks about my symptoms. i acknowledge that it’s not healthy and i always try to tag it and gove everyone fair warning bc i don’t wanna invade any boundaries! and i totally understand having seperate blogs too to talk abt negative things! god, i’m sorry, idk why i’m so worked up about this. i just feel like i should also be able to talk about the symptoms of my ed and my recovery et cet (2/? 🍀)without feeling like i’m encouraging anyone, or being told that i am, or being accused of promoting it. i definitely hate the idea of posting thinspo or anything, that’s not what i’m here for. i just want to be able to make a post like i do when my symptoms act up, and be like, “hey friends, i’m extremely anxious today and might have panic attacks”, and be able to do that w my ed. like “hey guys, my body dysmorphia is really bad pls don’t touch me today”. (3/? 🍀)i’m sorry for dumping this all on you, i just feel so lost and i can’t really talk to anyone about it. i feel like bc i never am able to talk about my friends about my symptoms out of fear of being labelled pro, that they dont really understand it. if i refuse to eat bc i’m anxious (but like, i have eaten already) they get upset. and if i say that i’ve eaten a healthy amount they disagree with me even if i can prove it really was enough. it feels like i’m not reliable about my own health (4/?🍀)i’m just so frustrated about not being able to talk about it, and then not being trusted about what i say, and. ugh. i’m sorry, i just needed to get this out. i don’t know what to do. i hope you have a lovely day though!! (5/5 🍀)

I think you should be able to say that, and people able to talk about symptoms/recovery! I think the issues with EDs is when you talk positively about ths symptoms, for example saying how happy you are that you’ve lost weight. To give a comparison, it would be like someone else saying “man it feels good to self harm” without any additional comments about how that’s an unhealthy and dangerous mindset, if that makes sense? There is 0 inherently wrong about talking about having an ED! You have a right to talk about it and vent, and the fact that you’re respecting boundaries and tagging things is good, you’re not doing anything wrong there!

[holisticdirkmuppet]

hey friendos, I was tagged in a thing by @everythingremainsconnected and @easywayouthuman :o

1. nicknames: chlo, chloid, chlobergine 2. gender: cis gal 3. star sign: scorpio 4. height: 5′7 5. time: 4:06pm 6. birthday: 3rd november 7. favourite bands: neon trees, paramore, arctic monkeys, the killers, fun., panic! at the disco 8. favourite solo artists: honestly i don’t have many, the only one i can think of atm is christine and the queens (i’m p sure she no longer has her queens) 9. song stuck in my head: feel good by neon trees 10. last movie you watched: nine lives, which is a god awful film about a father who turns into a cat but it made me laugh and the cat looked rly soft so i still recommend 11. last show you watched: i think it was some chat show that was on TV the other day idk 12. when did you create your blog: I have no idea, i started using it properly when I was like 18 and got into BBC Sherlock but i’d had it before that and just not used it bc i didn’t really understand how :’) 13. what do you post: a hell of a lot of dghda, as well as animals, gay shit and stuff that makes me laugh 14. last thing I googled: a law firm lol i’m looking for jobs 15. do you have any other blogs: uh... i may or may not have a tasteful nsfw blog because i try to keep my main mostly sfw

16. do you get asks: occasionally, and i love it!                      17. why did you choose your URL: i had about 20 possibilities in a note on my phone bc I’m nerd trash. basically i just wanted something more dirk-related :’) 18. following: 997 19. followers: 491 20. favourite colours: greens and blues 21. average hours of sleep: like 8-10 and i’m still constantly exhausted *finger guns* 22. lucky number: i have absolutely no clue 23. instruments: i played clarinet when i was younger, haven’t picked it up in years tho 24. what am I wearing: my work uniform bc i just got home and haven’t taken it off yet 25. how many blankets do you sleep with: usually 1 duvet, occasionally 2 if it gets really cold, and a blanket or 2 as well (i am a cold person) 26. dream job: something that makes me feel like i’m doing the world some good, isn’t super boring, and isn’t so stressful that it triggers my mh probs? 27. dream trip: I really wanna go to the far east 28. favourite food: anything mexican, also pizza (preferably with goats cheese) 29. nationality: english/british 30. favourite song right now: again feel good by neon trees, and some of the songs from the new paramore album - rose colored boy, 26, and fake happy

I tag @lucythepurrmaid @dont-offend-the-bees @dirkly @thats-entirely-too-much-tuna and just anyone else who wants to tbh!

[lummophoenix]

tagged by @spookyalchemist​ yooo thanks :P

Age: 19

Birthplace: Illinois :P

Current Time: 10:36 pm

Drink you had last: some apple cider, that was like 4 hours ago tho

Easiest person to talk to: at this current moment my roommate but honestly like anyone? idk lol

Favorite song: uhhhhh currently How Far I’ll Go from Moana

Grossest memory: id rather not have to put trigger warnings on this post, im grossing myself out just thinking about it (OH SHIT i just remembered a better one.. this one girl in my middle school ate her entire pudding cup with a piece of baloney as the spoon.. to test her abilities or something?? idr why lol that was gross as shit)

Hogwarts house: Ravenclaw i think?

In love: ahahahHAHAHAHAHAAHDHAHAHAH

Jealousy: of lots of others talents definitely... like anyone whos super good at cranking out fast good art pieces??? the fuck u doin mate give me your skill

Killed.. someone?: no??? why is this a question lol

Love at first sight: ahahahahhahahhahah

Middle name: Ramsay (dont say Ramsey or my forefathers will manifest in your house physically)

Number of siblings: zero

One wish: i didnt have to sleep so i could get so much more work done. or that i had a big box of scones either one is good

Question you are always asked: im usually the one doing the asking? maybe unless its like did you see what i posted in the group chat or something

Reasons to smile: FRIENDOS and good music and sugar..

Song you sang last: pff probably something like the 3rd bnha theme? i was scream singing a bunch yesterday but i dont remember what it was

Time you woke up: 9:42 am i think?

Underwear color: boring old white i dont invest much in fancy shit like that 

Vacation: god i wanna vacation somewhere warm it was like 39 degrees today and i have no winter coat

Worst habit: cracking my knuckles and procrastinating till the cows come home

X-rays: getting an x-ray on your broken middle toe is like the hardest thing ever.. especially with weird bent toes like i have 

Favorite food: ooh my trademark answer is fettuccine alfredo but i love pizza and chocolate glazed donuts

Zodiac sign: aquarius

i tag @arlyis @literally-grendels-mom @pthalbds-97 and anyone else honestly its late im blanking on names

[miraculous-writings]

Hey drama queen, I posted that because I saw your post trashing on people fic just because of the tag. To be honest, I only want to take criticism from a reader who actually read my fic, not from someone who only read the title and then assume that the fic is trash. I tagged it as r*pe because of a scene where a female oc forced herself on Shun, it was still r*pe because it was against his will, and Hajime didn't involve in it. So is that abusive to you? What I just want to say is read the fic before jumping to conclusions. 

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^^^^ i think this was a submission? Idk but it was anonymous

Anyways heres my response

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Hahah hey guys I dont like it when ppl dont appreciate me making the characters you love go through traumatic events and if they express they hate it when i force their characters to be r*ped for the sake of my fic i make passive aggressive posts and then send you anon messages bc im, obviously, in the right.

Dude write what you want but you are literally insane since u legit said writing is boring without forcing a character to be r*ped. As someone who has been r*ped an uncountable number of times-- fuck you. Someones life story can be 1000000% wonderful without having it happen to them. Idc WHAT context you put it in! You're garbage! Its one thing I DONT have to read the fic to know youre just shitty. Being r*ped isnt something that is necessary for character development in a character where it never canonically happened, nor is it necessary for the development of a future relationship. In fact its more likely to ruin the characters future relationships.

Just shut the fuck up i blocked you on like 2 accounts after you followed me just to vague me. You obviously just wanna start drama and youre looking for some spice in your life but im not here to provide it. Go hide in your little r*pe romanticism hidey hole and stay away from me.

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Call me whatever names you want, this is the reaction from someone who had ACTUALLY gone through it. Its not all sparkles and rainbows and you can come out of having it happen to you just fine. No. Thats not how it works. And I didnt write any type of constructive criticism for anyones r*pe fics bc hey guess what? I didnt read them! Bc i dont need to be reminded of what happened to me when i was 8 / 12 / 15. Neither do a TON of other readers. We dont gotta read to know we wont like it. And we are fully allowed to express displeasure in the majority of our fav ships fics having r*pe in it. And p.s. my notes about abusive wasnt because of your fic im guessing, THERES LITERALLY TONS OF HAJISHUN FICS THAT HAVE BOTH R*PE AND ABUSE. MULTIPLES. NOT JUST YOURS. I NEVER EVEN PAID ATTENTION TO YOU SPECIFICALLY. In fact I'd say idk you but i recognize your name but ive never done anything more than glaze over the tags of your fics and scroll away. I had nothing against u bc ik ur allowed to write w.e u want. I just knew id never read any of your fics. But now youre out here making passive aggressive posts and making it obvious you wanted me to see them, and sending me dumb anon shit littered with stupid insults. When you didnt even understand the point of my post. And youre baselessly thinking im "attacking" you or someshit. No i expressed a negative emotion about a broad range of fics which have triggering subjects that have been posted over time ever since I joined the fandom, and its only increased lately.

But no. I wont read ANYTHING with r*pe or abuse, ever, bc it will inherently be triggering and most likely garbage to me. If you cant create conflict without traumatizing characters you just arent someone whose work id ever want to read. Post whatever but people are allowed to not like it. I never sent you or anyone else hate for it, but if i make a post on my own blog explaining my dislike / hatred for r*pe fics you have ABSOLUTELY NO reason to go out of your way to make passive aggressive posts directed specifically at me that you want me to see and send dumb anon shit. Im allowed to have negative opinions and it wasnt even directed at your bullshit specifically so fuck off.

[undeademoprincess]

82 Truths

rules: once you’ve been tagged you’re supposed to write a post with eighty-two truths and then tag twenty-five people.

tagged by @hoseokjinns bruh this has been sitting in my drafts for how many eons????

name: Dawn blood type: b nickname(s): Celeste (cousins mainly) and then anything else is adding an e or i sound to the end of my name (tho i have noticed dawners is a frequent name) r/s: dead inside zodiac sign: libruh pronouns: she\her favorite tv shows: dude, i havent seen any tv shows since i was 8, that was well over a decade ago. i collect the dvd/blurays of tv shows but not often. my mother and i are really into futurama but other than that its usually animes that i collect long or short hair: literally lopped my hair off myself like 3 days ago height: 5′5″ do you have a crush on someone: if fictional characters count then yes, the husband list keeps growing and i need another closet to shove them in but real life im fighting a “battle” what do you like about yourself: i have yet to be called annoying or that im an ass to those i love and i support them with all i can, so ive got that going for me right or left handed: right, tho i am ambidextrous over weird ass shit. like gymnastics im left dominate in??? idfk either man list of three favourite colors: literally any color associated with fall/autumn and ill be a happy camper

right now: eating: just ate a cracker that had peanut butter on it cause im munchin hard drinking: sweet h2o man i’m about to: probably go to bed or i might work on my drafts for my writing blog, havent decided yet listening to: a mix about cats, love, breakfast and being tired by in love with a ghost (on youtube) kids: hell no, unless i know i can support the damn thing with all i can while living comfortably along with someone i KNOW wont leave both me and the kid and help me then maybe, but its still a really strong no. pets are fam tho, so technically i have like 5 kids already get married: down for that, annoying someone all the time as a “job” sounds fun, especially if we get late night adventures and do weird ass cooking class shit for fun. ITS IN THE CONTRACT YA KNOW career: i really want to travel the world and get paid to do so, but at my own pace

most recent: drink: water????? idk what you want from me man im a thirsty hoe for livin phone call: been on discord all day today with 2 of my best friends and listening to music with my bot the other half on it song you listened to: lauv reforget (literally just came on) 

have you ever: dated someone twice: no been cheated on: nope, and im not the type to let them get away with it if they ever did kissed someone and regretted it: no lost someone special: yes been depressed: yes, began at a very young age due to the death of my father. literally had a midlife crisis when i was 4 cause of his death been drunk and thrown up: hell no kissed a stranger: no had glasses or contacts: glasses had sex on the first date: no, not really my thing broken someone’s heart: i think so, never really ask how they felt about it afterwards turned someone down: yuuuup cried when someone died: yes fallen for a friend: mmmmm, not really??? i usually crush on an acquaintance and my friends drag them in and somehow become friends later??? 

in the last year have you: made a new friend: uuuuuh, maybe 3??? i dont like leaving my house nor do i like wasting my time on strangers, especially if theyre rude fallen out of love: yeah laughed until you cried: many times, MANY FUCKING TIMES met someone who changed you: uh, i think so??? idk, i kinda find my own flow in life and people either respect it and enjoy the ride with me or fight it, and i dont have the energy to deal with pointless shit found out who your true friends were: ooooh yeah found out someone was talking about you: humans talk, its natural. i dont really do anything but i can see why someone WOULD talk shit if thats what this is asking about kissed someone on your fb list: ew no

which is better: lips or eyes: eyes hugs or kisses: hugs, i like being warm shorter or taller: both have pros and cons romantic or spontaneous: both? both sensitive or loud: idk what the fuck this is asking about but if its about being around people who are loud or sensitive then neither, im sensitive to headaches so loud people irritate me and trigger the pain and ive had bad experiences in person with sensitive people where they dont leave me alone and wind up stalking me???? i love being alone so neither hookup or relationship: relationship troublemaker or hesitant: one can be kinda fun but also a pain in the ass if they get you into trouble a lot and the other might not be as constantly fun per say but at least you shouldnt be in trouble as often 

first: best friend: Samantha surgery: thankfully nothing yet sport i joined: badminton  vacation: everything my parents did was while i was literally an infant soooooo yeah, greaaaaat memories

do you believe in: yourself: not all the time, but i rely on myself more than anyone else. i dont trust anyone for shit when i know damn well i can do it myself and know that if something goes wrong i myself fucked it up and can probably fix my mistake miracles: yes and no, i believe theres a reason for things to happen the way they do, and there are times i see it as miracles love at first sight: i believe in attraction at first sight, not immediately seeing someone soul or some shit heaven: im more for reincarnation and spiritual aspects in life and death

extras: how many people from your fb list do you know irl: 90% of them do you have any pets: im not counting my outside pets because there are too many to even keep track of to count so my children are 5 cats, toto my conure, oz my dog, tubby my gecko, and a beta fish and a catfish do you want to change your name: if i ever did, which i dont want to do, it’d be either Celeste or Aurora (my mom actually debated on calling me aurora after like the disney princess if you will and funny enough shes always been my favorite princess) what did you do for your last birthday: 2 of my friends kidnapped me and took me to dinner and we drove around and looked at interesting things. this years its during ren faire and im so damn happy what time did you wake up today: 9 pm. im sick atm and its really fucking up my sleep schedule  what were you doing last night at midnight: just got out of a call with one of my best friends and sat on my own server for a bit chillin with my music bot before my other best friend joined my after like SIX HOURS, DAMN YOU SIMON something you can’t wait for: ren faire, getting married cause then i get to sweater slap someone and get away with it, and being comfortably happy in life last time you saw your mom: a few hours ago? i went to the kitchen to get my cat to love on her and saw her then what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i wish i had more determination to see things through and not be scared to take the leaps to see it through have you ever talked to a person named tom: i worked in retail, so probably what’s getting on your nerves: a lot of things, mainly petty things. kinda wanna cut a toxic person out of my life but we all know thats easier said than done especially seeing how he talks to literally all of the people i talk with on a daily basis save one soul and he treated her like shit when he talked to her sooo yeah, dunno wtf is his problem but im tired of being the object of his frustration and anger, idk how the rest of my friends deal with his shit but im just so damn DONE

man im not taggin 25 people. if youd like to tag me as a “i found it from so and so” then go for it man, let youre dreams run free friend. im just a lazy sack of shit and am tired and im amazed im still up and that its TAKEN ME A MILLION DAMN YEARS TO DO THIS IM SO SORRY LEANNE