#idk if i need to say it but ​in literature/media guys

[cupofearlgreytea]

nothing can come in between a girl and her obsession for complex complicated fucked up toxic deliriously in love relationships

[lokh]

i dont know if i can finish this movie

[yutamayo]

SOME THINGS I DISCOVERED ON THE GONCHAROV WIKI

The New York Times mentioned Tumblr. That leaves an odd taste in my mouth. Makes me feel like someone just turned the light on in the kitchen and I need to skitter under the fridge...

People have been trying to understand tumblr since the beginning of tumblr time. The only ones closest to understanding it are the ones who know it can never be understood.

Take Caitlin, for example. The object of Goncharov is not to be made into digestible and marketable media, whether that be film or games or literature. Tumblr isn't made to be digestible and marketable. I know I am not speaking only for myself when I say that no one who has seen Goncharov wants to see Goncharov. It's already a reality.

Ryan Reynolds is the hero we don't deserve but the hero we must cherish. Idk how we feel ab Neil, what are our thoughts on this guy, idrk him. He cool?

And finally, the best part.

[leslie057]

rating things owned by nancy elizabeth wheeler

because she’s got a lot of little things. mostly they are very cute and strange little things.

starting off strong we have the prettiest tissue box in the world. 9/10, i think if i were sick it would make me feel better to have such a nice tissue box.

i’m fairly certain this is her diary beside it because her diary looks pink in the upside down version of her bedroom. so this is probably it? 11/10, i want to read it so bad. and very sweet pic with mom—7.5/10.

next up these pinstripe pants !! 10/10 i love them so much. oh and the index finger ring is there obviously, 8/10, such a consistent piece of her character.

a ribbon for being the bestest girl ever in the world. 10/10. also the card of cardinals: 6/10, probably just a christmas card or something rather than a symbol of her love for birds. but i still like it.

mr rabbit gets 11/10 for the name alone. and why does he look dead. i love him. he’s me.

descent from xanadu: QUITE LITERALLY 0/10. at first i was SO excited to cheer her on for reading a sex and drugs book at school but as it turns out? bizarre and gross. seems to go heavy on nonconsensual stuff. i snagged a free pdf and command f’d for whore and bitch. lots of results obviously (one use of c*ck crazy bitch…lovely). it seems men in this book say a lot of sexist stuff that the women pretend to hate but love which i can’t imagine is great for a teenage girl to consume. also just not sexy at all.

literally so bad, and this is not the worst of it.

sooo bad. the author was what 70 (??) writing that his female character got clinically DIAGNOSED with being a slut for every guy she comes in contact with. i know options for sexy literature were probably limited at this time but…please go check out something else. i wanna bonk her on the head with this book (paperback) and hug her. you don’t need to read this to be cool and sexually aware. moving on.

on the other side of that, the blondie calendar gives us a sense of the GOOD media she’s consuming!! a 10/10 no questions asked. we don't really get to see many of her hobbies or interests outside of investigation so this is a much appreciated detail.

of course like all good things in life the blondie calendar does get replaced. its replacement is what i will call Weird Antinaturalist Art Piece #1 seen in her room in s4. i give it a 4/10 because idk what’s going on really.

and here is a very crunchy screencap of Weird Antinaturalist Art Piece #2 from s4 which i will give a 5/10. note the boyfriend typical photography above it, for sure a 10/10.

there is also Weird Antinaturalist Art Piece #3 which gets an 8/10 because i like the composition and the piano player. where did she get this and why. interior decoration is her passion.

the sleeping bag and crochet pillow setup. 7/10. would take a cat nap here.

pluto!! 15/10, the best mickey mouse character i would say. i hope her cousin is taking good care of him.

bulletin board 10/10. i love how obvious it is that she has had this up for forever. probably a nice constant in her life.

and my favorite pic up there is this precious one. look at herrr. 5000/10.

her floral weekender bag. 6/10, i like it, but not as much as i like the speedwalk and the toss into the backseat. she was SO ready for her lab takedown road trip.

trapper keeper is a 9/10 because they probably put anything and everything on trapper keepers back in the day and yet still she chose this lovely understated hot air balloon. elegant.

tom cruise poster is 1000000/10 actually. she is so loyal to that man. actually though not a great pic of him all things considered so maybe i give it a 999999/10. (i love it so much because i know for a fact that jonathan byers works proactively to never acknowledge this poster, because he is more mature than that.) (he is not more mature than that, in fact he is a little pouty about mr cruise.)

KITTY FIGURINE. 10/10. i thought it was just in s4 but i found it on her other nightstand in s1. very very adorable. i imagine it is now one of the first things she sees in the morning (well that and her blue telephone: 8/10) which is bizarre and cute. the mixtape drawer gets a 10/10 for reasons that i don’t think i need to get into.

white fingerless gloves! 10/10. so chic for monster hunting.

black fingerless gloves from s4. hmmm 3/10, they're cool i guess but they don’t feel very nancy and the white ones are so much better. especially because you may get the splatter effect of monster blood on them in a battle scenario, which would be badass.

piggybank (with her name on the side). 2/10 unfortunately i don’t like him. he looks at me like i took out his whole pig village and i just need some quarters. also did she paint this herself? in that case, 3/10 for customization lol.

pastel underwear drawer: 10/10. her committment to the hollistic aesthetic and color palette of her room is impressive here. it was a good idea to use this drawer as a deterrence against her little brother and a money hiding place but clearly he has no manners and is a THIEF.

STRIPED SOCKS. 10/10. i realize it's hard to see because she's moving so fast (slow down he is not going anywhere) but they are indeed stripey even though i would have guessed solid white. and wow what good sleeping socks. stripes are just cozier. hope she got lots of sleep in those.

[ladyhindsight]

I admit I was ignorant on the matter but now that I know more about Israel and its army, I can't help but see the similarities between them and the Shadowhunters/Nephilim. I always wondered how could CC hail a society of child soldiers that forces assimilation or violence on anyone that opposes them as heroes.

And her obsession with European features and how all characters of color are half white and change their last names (super common practice in Israel). They either assimilate to the European/Nephilim culture, or they're demonic beings that want to kill the heroes.

Sarah J Maas too, and her obsessions with imperialism = good! colonization = good!, if I grow bored of ruling I'll go on a colonization spree to bring culture to savage people! (Idk if you've read her books)

I'm jewish but I grew up in a mixed family (of ethnicities and religions) and my jewish mom is an atheist who taught me Zionism is a racist, fascist ideology so I always avoided Israel like the plague. I regret staying ignorant for so long and not educating myself sooner. Now that I have, I see works by Jewish authors in a different light. And it makes me nauseous 🤢

During the early years of the series publication Clare’s biases were especially well out there, pretty implicit in her writing. There was the mess with the “I think” post, her favoritism of specific appearances (that to this day apply!), the favoritism of the Nephilim in general—the whole character of Jace Herondale himself! It’s not at all unfounded idea that what you said could be true. The same themes certainly are present in her works.

(I haven’t read anything from Sarah J Maas, but I’ll take your word for it.)

The whole series pretty much—including the child soldiers—romanticizes war. The true and heavy losses are not focused on (Max, anyone?), are brushed aside if they do not serve the anguish of a main character, death in battle is trivial if it is either the nameless/minor characters or the bad guys dying. But it could be a more general problem with young adult literature as well, not excluding that.

It’s rather unfortunate for Clare’s actual and true fans that she remains silent. I haven’t seen or found any statement from her. One TikTok commenter said that they needed her “to be one of the good ones.” It’s sad that her supporters who pour their heart, love, time, and money (!!!) into her and her works have to teeter on the edge of uncertainty because she is saying nothing. Clever really, being silent as if trying to play both sides in order not to alienate or lose either side of her fan base (and I don’t even know what other people) as if people will forever be satisfied with not making a stand of any kind.

Clare is a New York Times best-selling author, multiple times over, she has a platform. She has the platform to amplify the voices in Gaza, to condemn the action of IDF, even as little as to show support for the innocent civilians suffering in inhumane conditions, but it seems there’s nothing. I obviously can’t say what she could be doing that is not public, but if you’re doing charity or giving aid to the people—a big if since what do I know what she really thinks or does—it’s still strange that you wouldn’t share that at all.

Don’t be too hard on yourself and shame yourself for not knowing sooner or not knowing better earlier. There’s ton of things around us—media most of all—that might affect the amount of information people even receive about this, or any issues around the world. A lot of people, including myself, learn more and more over time, and the point is learning and becoming more aware of the absolute tragedy and horror that is happening in Palestine and has been happening for decades already.

[your--isgayrights]

re: that ask about barthes/hsy. I feel like it's not an outright framework against the traditional constructed system of classifying media but rather a critique about how it's not always best to solely rely on the author's intentions but rather a mix of both(like not all interpretations are gonna be correct as well too, like you said thats delusion)? and honestly it's interesting because orv also sends the message to not be overly reliant on escapism. This ain't even an ask lmao idk where i'm going with this but yeah

Yeah you're probably right I'm not really a theory expert so my experience of death of the author definitely isn't in directly trying to interpret Barthes' assertions but like seeing how other people have interpreted/applied his framework in their own works. Like I think because I'm a fandom guy and not an academia guy I see a lot of people misinterpreting death of the author or applying it to their experience of like commercial lit/storytelling. I will say tho I am like a mega liberal in terms of what I consider 'literature' because I think folk/pop literature is really special and important to me. Took a lit class once where I argued that a gas station receipt is literature.

That being said I def get that Barthes' in context is critiquing a status quo of his time like you say, and I don't disagree at all that like ultimately lit analysis needs insight from reading the text as well as attempts at understanding the author behind it. In terms of tragedy/the delusion, the aspect I was focusing on is more like the literary/thematic element of death of the author as a tragedy if that makes sense? Bc like while it's cool that source texts are so much easier to find/document in modern storytelling traditions, there's still this mythos/feeling of a story that gets so big it leaves the hands of the author entirely to become its own thing. Like I love humans bc that's the kind of thing that started religions and pantheons in the past, stellar, love how powerful stories can become and the ephemeral nature of true origin in that case, but again the power the story has is then no longer in the hands of the author once the story is viewed by a reader, which is why in ORV KDJ is the one running the universe on his subconscious lol.

Like bc of that evolution of author death in modernity though, like based in the reality of webnovels like ORV as commercial texts that get reinterpreted and transformed by translators and fans over and over again with anonymous authors we might not know much of anything about, the delusion I'm speaking of is that some of those millions of readers may not think of author intent at all and just view the finished work as a Product, something consumable. This is what I meant by apathetic delusion when I got into the part you agree with here of readers who only see text as an outlet for their own escapism.

The feeling you have of 'mix of both' is exactly what I'm trying to convey by the "impossible communication." Because text is ultimately speech, storytelling is conversation, it is an attempt to communicate from one author to however many readers. The writing on the wall idea from ORV is very related to this in that you are trying to convey this thing that you are not sure anyone will ever see just in hopes of one day being understood or seen by others, even if you'll never see those others or know how your words affected them. This is why I felt that orv's emphasis on text as Relationship between author and reader.

[vacantgodling]

author tag

thank you mj ( @mjjune ) beloved <3

i’ll do these for paramoiiiiii (which is pronounced para-MWAH bc i’m kissing it)

1) What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

oof. paramour has a lot of things going on in it, a lot of which are unintentional but evolved as i began to piece together the characters and the narrative. i don’t think paramour can be boiled down to a singular “main lesson” because i don’t think there’s really a lesson to be HAD. you can definitively read paramour for all of the deep thoughts i have about religion, masculinity, sex, gender presentation, and societal expectations, as well as like the horrors and suffering that greed can bring… or you can just read it as two guys who take the most stupid roundabout way to realize maybe the sex does have feelings. maybe the porn in fact has a little plot.

a lot of the messages woven into paramour have been marinating and maturing in me since 2020 tbh when i really started to allow me to be yknow. MYSELF. and so because i love them they got the projection beam as ya do.

2) What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

paramour is inspired chiefly by steampunk, rococo fashion, and france. lmao. the entire universe that paramour is in (which includes wips like alizath, teardrops, and that one wip that is new and budding but doesn’t have a name yet) is inspired by me bastardizing and colorizing (aka making every mc and all the characters black) europe bc i’m tired of fantasy, mythology, and history and all the things that i enjoy as a person being dictated and delegated to white people. so a lot of it is also “writing the story that i want to see” etc etc.

paramour specifically was also inspired by (but has moved away from QUITE a bit): hamlet, crimson peak, beauty & the beast, gothic literature (that aspect has heavily stayed) and stuff like that. it’s original name was beauty and the crimson hamlet and it was more of a haunted house thing vs what it’s evolved into now lol.

3) What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

hya is honestly trying to achieve being left the fuck alone and he doesn’t succeed LMAO. i’m not really trying to achieve anything with hya particularly (again you can read into all the things that i put into him and the narrative or he can be just some guy and both are correct tbh) — other than extreme wish fulfillment. though it may not seem this way because hya is a raging dick, he’s ideally what type of person i want to be like in Extreme fantasy land. i wish i was joking but i ain’t. and as such, he gets forgiven of a lot of the things that he does by the narrative or gets his own little happy ending and reasonings why he’s like this which i know some or many people will take issue with. him leaving a corpse in the foyer for example—many will describe him as cruel and callous and “problematic” and they’re right! love that for him 💛 i’m not trying to inspire anyone but myself like when i tell you that paramour is a wip written by me and for me i mean it LOOOOOL like idgaf about what anyone thinks of it 💀 (though i am so happy so many people love paramour as much as i do i didn’t think anyone would care about these assholes but many of my dear friends and other followers have proved me wrong and it’s validating tbh lol)

4) How many chapters is your story going to have?

current outline says 27 but i’m thinking it’s gonna lean closer to 30 just because as i write i realize i need to add in a filler chapter or two. so i’ll say it’ll probably end up being 30–at MAX 35 chapters probably.

5) Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

original 💛 and i still don’t particularly know where i want to publish it meaning idk if i want to go for indie which makes more sense or tryyyy to get trad published but. with the content paramour is and the way the publishing industry is i somehow highly doubt i can get it trad pub. so nothing but snippets online (tumblr) for now. maybe if i go indie i’ll make it readable on a website or whatever cuz i’m not really keen on putting it on amazon. but i may just for the reach. idk! i’m just trying to finish it first.

6) When and why did you start writing?

if we’re talking generally speaking i’ve been making stories since i was like 3 years old. paramour in itself however i made juneteenth (6/19) of 2021. i can’t remember WHY i started it so much as i remember just wanting a wip inspired by crimson peak perhaps? and we have gone WAAAAY off from that but yknow. we move lol.

7) Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

honestly just write for you. take all advice with a grain of salt and don’t worry about what others think of your writing/your ideas/whatever. there’s something for everyone and you’ll find your people.

other writeblrs/artists/creators whatever i follow and would recommend (and tag to do this if ya want no pressure) are: @kudzucataclysm @henrike-does-writing-sometimes @kazenokaori @magic-is-something-we-create @void-botanist @outpost51 @isherwoodj & consider this an open tag if you would also like to do this :)

[icelogged]

𓏲࣪ . ᥫ᭡ ˖ ࣪15 questions˖ ࣪ tagged by @pinktrailerprincess thank you meg!

1. are you named after someone? ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎both oleta and p*per [my birth name] were not but ophelia…… has a #namesake because i am a nerd :3 (my birth name isn’t a dead name to me :3)

2. when was the last time you cried? ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎i don’t remember. writing this post. technically i rarely cry if the criteria is tears because of my medication. i know what crying felt like from before so i use the as my definition with or without tears. ㅤㅤ‎ aside: i feel like i give crybaby energy… i’m more of a catatonic-esque numb girlie frozen in the shape that torment’s cruel hands twisted and stretched. clay burnt. an art piece as a weapon.

3. do you have kids? no. i am kids.

4. do you use sarcasm a lot? ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ i keep the ironic /silly /joke /sarcasm on during sex ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ excluding irl

5. what sports have you played? ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ bit of a barbie when it came to sports. name a sport and i’ve probably done it at least once. ashamed to say i’ve never played ice hockey (only floor) <- flop canadian but i did and still ice skate :3

6. what's the first thing you notice about someone? ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ i assume it’s different from person to person… though it’s probably their height (i need to be the tallest the room but that will never happen :c )

7. scary endings or happy endings? happy endings can be scary. i don’t see these as opposites. “sad or happy” endings would make more sense to me. ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ i am struggling to pick from the options given as it’s very subjective. who is left happy? who is left scared? i want to say i enjoy a good story regardless of the tone of the ending but given my track record it seems i do i have a preference for story that have scary endings whether there is happiness or not.

8. do you have any special talents? ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ i suppose so. no party tricks, i think.

9. where were you born? ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ 🇨🇦 and raised.

10. what are your hobbies? ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ various forms of art mostly. i am currently putting the most time into filmmaking and mixed media projects. i also enjoy consuming horror media, baking, exploring, fashion, being outside, dressing up, dolls, writing up fake studies, essays and the like…girlblogging, being annoying [this is not self deprecation], arm chair anthropology, collecting information 👁️ :3 (please inject earth sciences pdfs into my brain especially hydrology and entomology :3)and more! i used to be super interested sexology especially regarding disabled, transgender and black sexuality but it got impossible to blog about [without an army of hole hunters appearing on my doorstep like clockwork everyday]. it would be cool to get back into it… i do use sexology in my work not but it isn’t my focus because of the aforementioned problem. i am literally the chilliest little guy on planet earth i am 100% down to try anything and maybe add it to my hobby list.

11. do you have any pets? not anymore :(

12. how tall are you? not tall enough for this ride :( [about 5’9.5 or 5’10 idk]

13. favourite school subject? ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎i’m one of those annoying people who enjoys every subject. ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ i’ve said it before but i’m so bad at separating me from online me so it’s probably not surprising that i think media, religious and gender studies go hard. photography is probably near the top of the list too. english literature is like a special little treat.

14. what's your dream job? ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ something something i do not dream about labour. i get really sad that this can’t be my reality but i’d love to devote myself to my art and studies. omg time to update this post L O L i’m crying my illnesses are not compatible with the average job thus the bane of my existence. so if i could live comfortably cranking out general art daily, my writing that’s something between girlblogging and an essay monthly with films every couple years ugh could you imagine…?

15. what colour are your eyes? ‎ ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎ ‎ ‎ ��� ‎ ‎ ㅤㅤ‎i am so vain about them oops. they’re this rich warm bright chocolaty brown despite how olive toned the rest of my family and i are**

as usual i tag everyone / just say i tagged you ! i’m curious about the answers to 1, 5, 6, 10, 12, 14 !! <3 empty version under the cut !

15 questions tagged by @icelogged

1. are you named after someone?

2. when was the last time you cried?

3. do you have kids?

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

5. what sports have you played?

6. what's the first thing you notice about someone?

7. scary endings or happy endings?

8. do you have any special talents?

9. where were you born?

10. what are your hobbies?

11. do you have any pets?

12. how tall are you?

13. favourite school subject?

14. what's your dream job?

15. what colour are your eyes?

[tubborucho]

Alright, so back at LEAST fifteen years ago, there was a rise in men loving men/yaoi manga, anime, and Japanese literature. The audience was overwhelmingly straight women at the time, for one reason or another, and a 2005/2007 issue of a magazine called Eureka was one of the first to actually publish the word. They explained that it translated to "rotten/spoiled/fallen girl", as something of an insult, but it was taken by storm in both Eastern and Western media since. When I was about 12 years old, fujoshi was a very common term thrown around, self-proclaimed fujoshis calling yaoi their guilty pleasure and calling their characters their "sinning gaybies" which makes me CRINGE to think that I actually said that once, but whatever whatever

So, in recent years, there was a moral pushback on the term fujoshi, saying it was wrong, fetishizing, and otherwise, but in even more recent years a lot of past-fujoshis ended up coming out as transmen, and the term's a little more obscure than it used to be. Now, though, fujoshi is sort of an in-joke on tumblr, teasing at how fujoshis are a "necessary component of the entertainment industry" and how cis women need to "fetishize lesbians more to make yuri more popular" which is under HEAVY layers of satire, or at least I hope

But yeah!! There you go, when I call you a fujoshi for the sake of that chart, I tease about it because the connotation is NOT nearly as severe as it once was, and I actually quite respect your enthusiasm when it comes to certain QSMP ships :]

Oh god

Lmao, thank you for the explanation. Idk why people need to shame every fucking thing other people do, shipping is just for fun, who cares if you ship two guys as a straight girl or two girls as a straight guy or ANY other combination, bruh

And yeah, dw, I get that it’s all /lh, you wouldn’t hurt me even if you were serious ahahah. I just do not care enough to feel guilty about shipping at this point.

[stars-in-a-jam-jar]

So like. Functionally. The concept of Media Literacy is the ability to, with some level of proficiency, comprehend and interpret a text; not just as in being able to read the words and process the structure of the sentences, but to derive an underlying ethos from that text. It's the difference between 'I like Ritz and other salty snacks' and 'Lotta nuance to a Ritz cracker if you really pay attention'.

I think at the core of people saying media literacy is dead is the attitude amongst a slowly growing (or at least slowly growing louder) contingent of people attempting media analysis who try and Come To The Correct Conclusion and the way that attitude clashes against Most Other Things. The people saying they know the one thing this art is Actually saying and Actually about say people are either foolishly blind to or willfully ignoring The Important Parts, so they say media literacy is dying. The complex soup of people who think those people are being ridiculous for one reason or another say those guys aren't actually engaging with the text on its own terms, or under the lens it is meant to be seen, or with the proper amount of grace and good faith, or any other way to criticize someone's approach to media analysis. So they also say media literacy is dying.

This further clashes against casual enjoyers who only consciously know their own personal tastes and intuitively vibe check pieces of media based on what those tastes are. Either you own being a casual enjoyer of a thing and chafe at all the people talking over your head about What's Actually Going On And What It's Actually About/Saying/Implying/Endorsing/Whatever, or you feel the need to be on the same level as everyone else and try to articulate and justify intuitive vibes-based things inside yourself using the only language available to you, which is often other people on the internet. This is a bonkers unreliable way to develop and articulate an argument, opinion, or interpretation about anything. Like, example, I initially got as interested in media analysis as I did when I was a middle schooler because I watched Friendship is Magic and there was a very active community of randoms making videos about it on YouTube. Most of them were doing high school freshman levels of analysis on these pony cartoons for elementary schoolers, which was incredibly convenient for me, a 7th grader with a lot of expendable energy, because it felt novel and challenging without being inaccessible to hear words like 'continuity' and 'character development' and 'metaphor' getting thrown around and broken down. However, it is important to note, I was Also paying a lot of attention in my PreAP English classes IRL. I graduated highschool with a college freshman level of English literature education and media literacy, at least according to them institutions what say who's smart and who's smartn't.

If I was dismissing my English classes out of hand because I figured 'I have other plans for my life, I don't need to dig into this gay little book about boys at a boarding school.' (Go read A Separate Peace) 'What was the takeaway from Lord of the Flies? People are weird and do bad stuff to one another, idk.' 'Why are we reading Shakespeare? Romeo and Juliet is depressing and I don't care about any of the other ones.' If I'd decided not to expend the energy becoming excellent at media analysis, I'd still be at that level I was in the 7th grade, kind of understanding that character development is important and things *can* mean other things and reference older stuff like myths or historical events, but not having a backlog of experience and texts I've paid close attention to which I can then apply to this random weird indie game or that shakily executed anime or that Really Visceral black humor podcast.

So basically what I'm saying is it boils down to a combination of too many people talking, too many people talking past eachother, and a lot of really underqualified analysts attempting to participate and muddying the waters.

"Media Literacy"

I know it is a problem, but everytime I hear someone say "Media Literacy is dead", I just hear someone saying "I'm so much smarter than these idiots!", like they themselves already know everything about how media literacy works, have never had an uninformed or biased take and that stories have ONE WAY they can ever be read or experienced or understood.

But maybe I'm misunderstanding the trend, so let's get this out: when people say there is a media literacy crisis, what EXACTLY do you mean?

[i-did]

hi hello i couldn't sleep last night so i was scrolling thru all ur asks and stuff and ur opinions and analyses are so interesting!!! and then afterwards i was thinking about what u were saying about mlm smut and i'd also been thinking about such things a little bit recently bc like.....at a certain point it becomes quite clear that the vast majority of smut-writing is just imitation. like there's the sex noise verb list and all and the whole general mechanics of the sex and those things just .... replicate over and over. and the whole thing w people writing mlm vs wlw smut regardless of their own sexual orientation..... like i feel like a big part of that is just a self-perpetuating thing. like if u have not had sex and u r getting all ur (pleasure-related) sex ed from fandom (even if u do watch porn, that doesn't rlly tell u how to describe stuff? idk) regardless of What fandom , the majority is going to be mlm smut. which is itself majority imitation of other mlm smut, imitating and imitating back to whoever knows what the first smut fanfic was etc. there's just way More to mimic than there is on the women side of things. which then becomes a self-perpetuating thing, bc the mimicry continues and generates more and more. and---if there are fundamental misunderstandings of anatomy involved---those self-perpetuate as well. and maybe even exaggerate. and yeah. does this all make sense? idk i was just thinking about it. like all the stereotypes and stuff continue bc writers are getting their inspo from other writers rather than their own brains. or something. idk!!!!! it's just all... divorced from reality? bc words. or something!! i hope u get what i'm trying to say. just thoughts i've been thinking. anyway i think ur thoughts are cool. and ur writing. ok bye have a good day!!

Okay yeah this is kinda messy but hope u see this, uhh yeah I think you're right about the echo chamber effect fr about stuff. I think it's a mix of projecting too sometimes. talk more under the cut and also link to a video essay since I love video essays.

Here’s a video that sort of touches on this topic: 

“Gay fanfiction” by Sarah Z. (has CC)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8E_C00dKwI

This video begins to talk about fetishization at the end, but also… not really. The words “gay fanfiction” is used as a catchall, when really gay fanfiction is largely mlm written by non-mlm.

Fandom is a largely women's space dominated by the female gaze in a media industry world that is dominated by men and the male gaze. I'm really glad women have this space to explore creativity and queerness, and I don't expect the female gaze to go away, but I am still ultimately bummed out I can’t read most fanfic or interact with most fandom spaces without having fetishization in my face. 

So about 80% of fandom is women, and most of those women aren't straight, but 90% of those women prefer mlm ships. Why don’t they prefer wlw ships? Well definitely part of it is the fact that queerbaiting is centered around white straight men, and then there is also the fact that women tend not to be written as well charcter wise. But the fact still remains that you get jerjean getting priority over Layla and Alvarez who are in canon just as much and are a canon wlw couple who actually interact as well as Alvarez could likely be a woc because of her Hispanic last name. Korasami doesn’t get nearly as much hype as zuko and saka, despite the fact that they are 2 fully dimensional characters who canonly kiss and hold hands, something the creators fought for and ended up having to sacrifice another reboot for. 

I do believe the fandom echo-chamber is largely responsible for… a lot of things, like you're saying. But what's interesting is that the complaints I've heard about visual porn from non mlm in the fandom space is that they can’t get off to it because its for the male gaze and misogynistic usually. But they also don't seem to notice how the mlm smut circles has the female gaze and is also… almost always mlm. If it was a pure anatomical not knowing thing, I get that, but I also think that leads to the question of “then why the male body for porn, and not your own? The one you know and are familiar with?” 

I know some people want to get outside of their own body for porn and don’t want to think of their own anatomy at all, but overall I'm still uncomfortable. If an anglo said “well I watch porn of only Mexicans so I don't self insert” I'm gonna be like … hhhh in a similar way. I understand people “like what they like” but I wish they also noticed said patterns in the first place. I understand the t4t tumblr porn circle, and how it's different from cis people who only watch trans porn. 

I actually wished that instead of fandom focusing on mlm ships where some asshole guy hits on bottom troupe charcter for top troupe character to save, was instead… a wlw character experiencing said shitty getting hit on and other wlw swooping in. what's interesting is fandom writes a lot about misogynistic experiences without often realizing it. Ive read fanfic where guys get called sluts for sleeping with people or called bitch for speaking their mind, these arent things men usually experience, but rather women. Fandom has a lot of internalized misogyny and also queerphobia imo. Women characters often get pushed to the sidelines and men become the canvas for female fans to project onto. 

There is this natural inclination to mlm. When people are talking about “gay shipping” or “gay books” or “gay feels” or even just “gay” mlm is what’s largely in mind. I honestly am kinda saddened by this because if gay fanfiction was really solely about writing more to feel represented, then you would see a lot of bi and ace and lesbian rep, but this isn't the case. Queer women are seriously underrepresented, and I want to hear their stories and read them in fanfiction as well as published. 50% of lgbt literature is mlm, and of that its largely written by women. Becky Albertalli, Rainbow Rowell, Maggie Stiefvater, are the YA big names and are all women writing mlm. Red white and royal blue is written by Casey McQuiston and Captive prince (which is not YA) is written by C. S. Pacat, who is non-binary, but is also TME and not mlm. These are all the big names in mlm lit, behind them is some gay men, but honestly their stories aren't preferred, they're not the right “flavor” for the consumers usually, who are largely women. In general YA consumers and authors are women, but I wish that they… just wrote about women too. I think there is a certain… snowball effect to the overrepresentation of mlm representing the whole LGBT community that leads to fetishization, as well as misogyny playing a factor in: less women characters being written well to write fanfic on, when they are written well they're taken less seriously or the audience struggles to relate to them, they're less marketable then men. 

Idk I never feel “seen” or “represented” by any of the books above, which don't address boyhood and manhood and queerness intersecting really, and AFTG doesn’t either. I relate to AFTG as a trauma victim who has experienced a lot of what many of the characters go through and have gone through in the EC as well as them just overall being very well written characters, but I don't relate to it as a mlm really. I've never seen like.. gay voice or being straight passing or femphobia or how boyhood can be affected from a young age by those around you sensing you're ‘other’ or if you didn't experience this you feel outside the mlm community. Let alone sub cultures like bear and leather and pup, at most you see the word “he's such a twink” in fandom which... i fr hate non mlm using that word because it's usually used to replace the f-slur essentially, used derogatorily or to call him “such a bottom” and stuff like that. It’s like a joke or an insult.

Long story short, idk mang this was a ramble and I think I'm coning down with something. I wanna see more queer women rep and women authors writing about being a queer woman too. I think it's a complex web of fetishization and a bit of forbidden love yaoi culture (or it used to be in the BOYXBOY days) as well as misogyny on an industry level, creator level, as well as reader/consumer and fandom level. I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to explore other peoples stories and what we read has to be segregated, “only mlm are allowed to read and write mlm, only wlw are allowed to read and write wlw,” but I also think author’s intent and audience and background is telling, as well as overall statistics. Like about an hour ago I was looking for cookbooks in spanish or in english, and I was looking for some mexican food cook books, but I had to look for them using words in spanish because otherwise what came up was a bunch of “fiesta party, easy as uno dos tres authentic cooking!” and I was like… hm. Since I could tell they were marketing to anglos. (also the author’s last names were like michelle smith, james cooper, and this could be for a variety of reasons, but I trust Hispanic names more tbh and deadass would look at the authors pictures and if they had other books in Spanish or what their specialties were.)

anyways. not sure how to end this. uhm if anyone has any book recs (my to read list is like 500 books tho no joke) preferably not YA white mlm written by a white lady, hopefully queer women written by queer woman, LMK, I need more wlw and queer women stories on my list. I have a decent amount but always looking for more. I kinda wanna link my goodreads or my storygraph but I also don't want to get doxxed and it has my legal name on it so.

Also, I'm dyslexic and using spell check but if there's like some wild typos my b.

[pacifymebby]

Hiiiiii so me and my guy are hanging out tomorrow and I’ve got no idea what we’re doing yet. And seeing as we’re in the honeymoon period we’re really keen on each other physically and like it’s really hard to hold that back as I’ve been enjoying it so much but I’d really like to get to know him better if you get me?? Like I don’t want to get six months into a relationship with him and realize I don’t know shit about him! I mean that’s a bit dramatic but you get the point. Another problem with that is that I find that I’m quite a boring person. I don’t have much going on in my life right now to spark conversation and I have a hard time consuming media so not much to talk about. Do you and B have much in common when it comes to interests? Because I feel like me and him don’t really have that many common interests but I’m always willing to listen to someone who wants to speak about theirs and he seems like the type of guy who would do the same for me (although I’ve not got much to talk about lol). But do you think that’s enough? Like being willing to listen and learn about another’s interests and not having prior knowledge or interest in it? I guess I’m just kind of afraid and insecure that he’s going to realize I’m not as cool as he thought I was and that he won’t be into me anymore. Haha sorry for the rant and as always thank you for the help ❤️ - age gap crush anon

I mean thing is you probably are more interesting than you think you are for a start. What music do you like? What was the last bit of media that actually caught your attention?

A thing me and B have in common is that we're both ridiculously behind the times when it comes to pop culture. Neither of us have watched all of stranger things for example. I never saw squid game. Me and B do have some shared interests, we're both into music (and there's some crossover in our taste but like, he likes soooo much and I'm really fussy, he likes hip hop and jazz and idk funk, and I like indie and shoegaze and old motown stuff, my favourite bands are Roxy music and Slowdive, and B knows like one Roxy album and thinks slowdive are boring)

Again with TV and films and stuff, B has never seen Lord of the Rings and doesn't think he has the attention span, but they are my favourite films. He does say hell watch them with me one day though. He likes Twin Peaks and I had never watched it, so we've been watching it together recently.

I love reading and writing and B literally does not read and doesn't understand literature at all. If I show him my poetry or writing he's like, I don't get it but I support you you're very talented. And I know he hasn't understood it one bit and doesn't know what to say haha

He's fucking obsessed with stats and really likes to talk to me about data sets, but I don't understand that shit at all. I still like listening to him talk about it though.

But the love and support is there ya know and that willingness to get to know someone's interests and stuff. You don't have to like everything the same and actually j think it's good to have bits of yourself that are yours and that you don't share because it helps you hold onto your own identity within the relationship. You're two different people who fit together well. Think of it like the yin and yang symbol right, to yins wouldn't fit together. You need those differences.

Try not to be too para about getting to know him and stuff, the more time you spend together the more you'll get to know of eachother naturally but also you should just talk about your week and like what you have done. Even if that stuff is fucking dull.

You can also bond over the fact that you don't like stuff. Like me and B hate a lot of the same stuff but like different stuff and actually I think that works really well.

You can ask this guy if he's watched anything good or read anything interesting or whatever, and if he's super busy ask him about what he's been doing like, you can say how was your week and let him talk. If he's a talker he'll probably just naturally tell you loads and then within that you can respond to it and talk about stuff back, or ask him questions and all that ya know?

I think it's easy to get para about it but you're probably just over thinking stuff.

If you're worried though you can say it to him, you can be like I don't know much about you, and do it in a cute way idk, tell him you wanna get to know him or whatever, like I'm sure hell want to get to know you too. You can totally say you don't even know what you like or something haha.

Honestly I'm sure you'll have stuff in common and also, you can bond over disliking something he likes and the other way too. Me and B bond a lot over him teasing me over my music taste or me just bejng like wow u nerd, or point blank saying I have no idea what he's talking about. Like we tease eachother about our uncommon ground all the time.

[gokubrain]

same anon as before and I kno u say it's fine but like I kinda feel obligated to talk about db cause its db ldnabdb so sorry again but yea!!!! it's so wild that to this day even the official vas for Geta and Goku will make little jokes about the 2 having an immensely special relationship (like that time sabat said vegeta has a goku wig for "reasons") and like even tho those are jokes I get kinda happy from it cause its being acknowledged! and god Goku really was the first person, possibly ever, that vegeta put his entire faith and hope in and even after he died he kept aiming for Goku and brings him up at least once in almost every appearance he's made ever. and Goku wanting him alive (wanting!) so they could have a rematch, which ultimately lead to them having the special relationship they have now just speaks volumes of relationship potential this series hasnt see much of. I know it's kinda nuts but gosh I just feel like those years of when I was super young and thought of how close these 2 have been validated now that I know how to use some sense of critical thinking for this series. toriyama really made characters that could be good gay rep and he has absolutely no idea about it.

yeah omg actually let me tell u smth cool, chris sabat followed me on twitter for a bit and i talked to him in dms about kakavege LOL he said he could totally see a relationship between them !! so that's rly cool

but yeah when the literal voice actors for the characters have grounds to make jokes about them being gay then you know something must be up HAHA

i'm getting a little overwhelmed (/pos!!) so sorry if my following thoughts are a bit jumbled LOL BUT

SAME THO when i was younger i shipped them but as i got older and was able to read deeper into literature and had more experience doing so with other media i was like wow,,, they really truly are gay huh LOL

it's really very fitting i feel like that like. IDK LOL like they're both so similar in terms of like,,, okay okay LOL

i have a hard time putting it into words but fighting is a thing that is very important to both goku and vegeta so the idea that a big major life-changing battle is what brought them together (AND APPARENTLY WHAT TAKES THEM OUT AS WELL ACCORDING TO DBO LOL) is soo romantic LOL AND like. yes god it's so crazy i bet when vegeta heard goku want to spare him his heart just beat out of his chest LMAO LIKE. EVERY TIME I WATCH THE SAIYAN FIGHT I'M LIKE WOW,,, THEY MUST BOTH BE HAVING SOME RLY CONFUSING FEELINGS RN LOL LIKE THIS IS LITERALLY WHERE EVERYTHING STARTS FOR THEM!! this is even confirmed by goku's whole "pls spare vegeta i Must see him again" speech at the end of the fight LOL AND ALSO right after that speech and after krillin spares him vegeta's like "i'll be back motherfucker" which i always interpret as vegeta having mild gay panic and being unsure how to respond to such reckless kindness lol

like i know goku's reason for sparing him is because he wants to get stronger and beat him and vegeta's reasoning for saying he'll be back is revenge and both of those things are true but i can't help but feel like there are some underlying feelings here akin to that feeling you get when you realize you like someone lmfao like. yeah you guys wanna fight again huh? because that fight was unnecessarily homoerotic and you just HAVE to experience those feelings again huh?? okay homos

sorry im rambling a bit but while reading ur anon i was reminded of another very important kakavege scene in the freeza arc where vegeta is fighting freeza and he's about to die but then suddenly goku arrives!! and it's such an important moment for both kakavege and just for vegeta's (questionably written, i know) characterization. to this point vegeta has been listening to everyone else talk about goku, when's goku gonna show up, we need goku to come save us, goku can beat freeza, goku goku goku and i'm sure vegeta was absolutely disgusted by this LMAO LIKE he didn't really get it, but when he's about to die by freeza's hand and suddenly goku shows up i feel like vegeta experiences for the first time this wave of relief that the other z warriors are all too familiar with. like everyone always has to hold out until goku gets there and when he finally does the relief is just absolutely palatable. vegeta witnessed this happening first hand when goku finally arrived during the saiyan arc but now he's experiencing what it's like to be on the other end and have goku arrive in shining armor to save him LOL I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE?? like it's such a turning point for vegeta where he realizes he's actually elated to see goku here at the final hour, even if vegeta does bite the dust here it's obvious that he has faith in goku's ability to kill freeza by his dying speech (WHICH IS A WHOLE OTHER KETTLE OF FISH, HOLY SHIT LOL. VEGETA CRYING AND BEGGING GOKU TO KILL FREEZA?? HE'S SO QUICK TO BE VULNERABLE HERE I'M SURE IT RLY WRACKED GOKU TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT LMAO)

but yea yes, kakavege is very dependent on this concept that goku is actually vegeta's savior and always has been!! he spares vegeta's life the first time they meet and then comes to avenge him in the freeza arc and ultimately vegeta's drive to be better than goku changes who he is as a person and its like. goku is the ONLY one who saw any worth in vegeta, everyone else hated him and wanted him dead LOL SO

TL;DR YEAH I'D SAY THERE ARE SOME PRETTY DAMN GOOD ARGUMENTS FOR KAKAVEGE

[janellion]

HAPPPYYY BOKAY THURSDAYYYYYY!!!!!!!! *que air horns* Anyways would you like to write some 80’s AU Bokay head cannons?? Like how you first met??

TYSM FOR THE ASK BB!! i’m sorry it took so long for me to get to it! this ended up being,, WAY longer than i anticipated? i just went off on one idea so this is less general hcs and kinda how we met and got together! also i made a moodboard for no reason? 

OK SO this is a college/uni bokay late 80s/early 90s au!!

bo is there on a sports scholarship (likely american football or maybe rugby) and also part of one of the frats on campus!!

so he’s not trying as hard as he could be on the academics side

THIS ISNT BC HES NOT SMART

i know a lot of ppl don’t see bo as smart BUT HE IS

he’s just focusing on other things and using his smarts to plan the best parties that campus has ever seen

so as a result of his scholarship, he has to keep his grades up

unfortunately, he’s slipping in a couple of his classes and gets told he needs to find a tutor and that’s where i come in!!

i work at the academic success center (i actually did do this in college!) and so he’s one of the students that i get assigned to work w

our tutoring sessions consist of a lot of him semi flirting but also blushing?

he’s embarrassed bc he’s here to get help even tho he could have done the work he’s just kinda lazy and gets distracted when there’s a million other things on his plate

like practice and workouts and training and the ton of frat events he attends

so the flirting is a lot of “you look different today, did you get a haircut or something?” “actually i slept like 3 hours thanks for noticing” and then awkward silences

bc im over here thinking ‘WHAT THE FUCK THIS GUY IS SO HOT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FOCUS ON SPANISH LITERATURE WHEN HE LOOKS LIKE THAT AHHHH’

at least at first?? but then he does all this cute stuff during tutoring sessions like chewing on the end of his pencil or doodling little notes in the margins of his books, or using cute photos of his family back home as a bookmark

and then it goes from just appreciating him as eye candy to ‘well shit i kinda wanna love him forever’

we go on with tutoring for a while, but eventually bo’s grades pick up and he doesn’t need the appointments anymore

both of us are a little too shy and awkward to say anything on the last session so we both go home at the end just kicking ourselves for not asking for a phone number or to meet up or anything

we don’t see each other for a while

or at least bo doesn’t see me for a while

i go to all of his home games and cheer him on but he doesn’t know bc i like to sit at the top and leave before the crowd heads out

but he’s always searching the crowd at games, trying to see if i’m there, and feeling a pit in his stomach whenever he sweeps the crowd and doesn’t immediately see me

one night some months later, after the season has ended, i’m waking back to my dorm through greek row bc i’m a slut for architecture and none other than bo is walking out of one of the large building wearing a toga, a crown of poorly painted gold leaves around his head, his face flushed, and a huge grin on his face

i stop in my tracks momentarily at the sight, wondering if i’ve actually passed out in the library and am dreaming

but then bo’s voice calling my name is ringing through the sounds of the party drifting through the open doorway behind him and he’s bounding over, the grin on his face growing

as he gets closer, i see the flush in his face and the slight stumble in his step and brace myself for impact as he crashes into me for a hug, his arms wrapping around my waist and lifting me up

“uh bo???” i’m blushing and trying to free myself from his grip ok i’m not trying that hard WHO WOULDNT WANNA BE IN HIS ARMS

but he’s just grinning and laughing before setting me down and grabbing my hand, pulling me into the brightly lit doorway and up the stairs of the house

“i’ve been kicking myself for not asking you out ages ago so let’s go out now!! we could get burgers or just walk around the city or get ice cream or go skinny dipping or —“ he cuts himself off, looking back at me with wide eyes as his smile drops for a moment while he lets go of my hand

“oh my god i mean if you want to of course i’m so sorry this probably seems so creepy and pushy —“ he babbles on, his facial expression now one of panic instead of excitement

i just laugh, still kind of thinking that i’m dreaming, and reassure him with a squeeze of his hand and a small smile, “bo no that all sounds amazing, i’d love to. i was hoping we’d run into each other too”

at this, his grin returns to his face as he continues bounding up the stairs and down a hall, before pulling me into a bedroom

“aren’t we moving kinda fast?” i tease him as i look around the incredibly chaotic room

bo turns around with a shocked look on his face before it melts into a grin and a hearty laugh as he sees the teasing look on my face

“i’m just getting changed! can’t go out on the town in a toga,” he calls over his shoulder as he walks to the closer. “don’t look,” he turns around and waffles his eyebrows at me with a grin, before pulling out a shirt and some jeans

as he gets changed, i turn around and look around the the room, not failing to notice the sticky notes littering his desk, little messages and reminders that i’d written for him during our tutoring sessions

i feel a tap on my shoulder and turn around to see bo, eyes excited and face still slightly flushed, but now fully dressed

he sees me eyeing the sticky notes on his desk and blushes even more, a hand going to rub at his neck before he’s laughing and grabbing one, looking at it affectionately before sticking it back down

“they help me stay focused, you know? remind me that i should be working hard. you really helped me a lot”

before i can respond, he’s grabbing my hand and pulling me down the stairs, out the door, and into the fresh night air

we walk around the city, getting to know each other better over burgers before getting ice cream and MAYBE SKINNY DIPPING IDK 👀

at the end of the night, we head back to my dorm, deciding to watch a movie and since “it’s close enough, and we might as well stay up to watch the sunrise” 

we end up putting on a movie, something fun and light like hercules, and cuddle up on the couch, falling asleep just before the sun rises 

+++

THE WAY I COULD HAVE KEPT WRITING I-- IM SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG AHHH

tysm for requesting this bb!! i rly didn’t think i’d be able to write much bc i don’t rly “get” decades aus? i think it’s bc there aren’t many POC in media from the 80s and 90s and so it’s hard to picture for me! but N E WAYS, this was my best attempt!! it was a lot of fun to write once i got into the mindset!! and thank yall for reading if you got this far?? I LOVE YOU 

🌻 bokay taglist (also my faves): @deadontheinsidebut @stcrryskies @sstardusty @zoni @kuronekomama @anianimol @the-kool-aid-man-is-real @nekoma-hoe @sugacookiies @churochuu @shoyosun @achoohq @miel-meraki @dearest-kiyoomi and i’m tagging @strawberriimilkshake @yamagucciii bc i think y’all might like to see this as well?

[janiedean]

Hi! I'm the Plato anon for before. First of, thank you so much for your offer, but I think I managed on me own. Second, could you elaborate on the "analysing as YA" vs "analysing as an adult" approach? I assumed that "discourse people" on this website generally don't go beyond "antagonist is bad because they are against the hero!" out of ignorance/lack of interest except to score Internet Fame Points, not that it was due a specific mindest. I also don't really read YA (except Tiffany Aching)

TIFFANY ACHING!! T_T ANON LET ME HUG YOU it’s like the only YA I actually liked in my entire life apart from nick hornby’s one book but that wasn’t typical lmao

THAT SAID, well your discourse people point is pretty much part of it but since I’m here and I can rant have the entire thing I was too tired to hash yesterday ;) so, in order:

first thing, we need to establish that ya books and **adult** books generally have different target audiences which is fine and good because obviously if you want to write a thing you’ll do that for An Audience That You Have In Mind; this doesn’t mean that adults can’t read ya or that teenagers can’t read **adult books** because everyone can read what they want (and personally for one I never cared for ya in my entire life not even when I was the target audience), but it simply means that some books are meant to be liked by one category first and eventual others later and they need to be talked about in that specific context first and everything else later - then there might be books that are aimed for kids/young readers or sold like that or that can be read on more than one level which can be appreciated for different things later in time (for example I read huck finn at sixteen and I absolutely loved it but it was a book that here is seen as good reading material also for eight year olds, and at eight I wouldn’t have liked it for the reasons I did at sixteen, and if I read it now I would still like it, while a bunch of the books for kids I read when I was seven is stuff I enjoyed then but forgot now and probably was good for that age but didn’t stick with me);

second thing, that means that when I discuss a young adult book aimed at teenagers I will never hold it to the standards I would hold a book aimed at a general adult audience, especially if it’s the kind of ya like dunno as stated the vampire diaries aimed at teenage girls which is obviously the kind where you have the fantasy world with the hot dark guy who swoons the high schooler protagonist off her feet etc because that stuff is basic teenage girl fantasy 101 and like... I’ll expect a bunch of romance tropes, the usual push and pull, the guy eventually being into her, the protagonist being someone a fourteen year-old can see herself in, probably a few sexual elements thrown here and there and so on, because that’s the shit marketed at fourteen year-olds who want to read that and like... it’s really not that deep. I can’t ask the vampire diaries to be moby dick because it’s not meant to be. or, if I read percy j/ackson - which is another thing I have zero interest in but I know about because I see tweets from the author - I expect to have a bunch of teens coming into their own coming from different backgrounds because the author wants to represent properly a lot of categories so most of his readers can have someone they can see themselves in and like if a thirteen year-old who suspects being lgbt or whatever sees themselves in the gay kid from per/cy jackson guess what that’s what that book is for, so I won’t judge it on like... being a faithful representation of greek myths or how good the style is or whatever, because even if to me it’s not top notch writing or has a plot idc about it has to be for teenagers and pre-teens, not for me, a thirty year old who again didn’t even like pre-teen aimed literature when she was a pre-teen;

third, I can extra clarify it using the damned hp discourse, as in: when I say I’m tired of people not reading anything else or reading everything like hp, it means that they read it when they were growing up/were teens and it was aimed at them which is fine, but then twenty fucking years later when the people in question are way beyond their twenties (guys I’m almost 32 and I remember when the first one came out come on) when talking about any single piece of media in existence (movies, comics, other books) use hp characters/situations as the terms of paragon - like guys I had to read sn/ape comparisons with theon and ky/lo ren on the basis that THEY’RE GREY CHARACTERS as if sn/ape is the only grey character that ever existed, people keep on talking about vold/emort as the only bad guy that ever existed and so on, and like... you can’t talk about, idk, asoiaf or any book aimed at an adult audience like you’d talk about hp, because at this point I wouldn’t be surprised if I read comparisons between sn/ape and ivan karamazov and I think I don’t need to specify how completely nonsensical that would be;

now, with all of this explained, what I mean is: ya in general - which is not a fault per se of the genre since it’s aimed at teens and pre-teens - tends to have... very fixed narrative schemes depending on which teens it’s addressing - like, stuff like tvd or twilight is obviously the romance teenage girl fantasy where you have the girl fighting to be with the dark beautiful supernatural creature in question, per/cy jackson is more like I’ll give you a bunch of relatable characters having cool adventures against bad guys with the occasional redemption so we can see that people are redeemable but you still have right vs wrong, hp is sort of like that in the sense you get relatable-ish protagonist with relatable friends growing up throughout the entire thing and fighting on the good side vs the evil side including the usual death of the mentor plus people who seemed bad actually not being bad™ except that PJ has more povs and better rep from what I gather but that’s not the point so it’s basically the growing up journey for the young protagonist(s) the kid sees themselves in, then there’s stuff like hunger games where you actually have the dystopian worldbuilding just written to be enjoyable by younger people who don’t want to get too depressed (and ngl I haven’t read the books but I’ve seen the first two movies and guys the way everyone ignores the classist commentary in thg to discuss the love triangle is... a staple of the problem tbh) but still try to introduce deeper themes and have more nuanced characters and at the same time are still written to be enjoyed maybe by the more adult side of the target, and at the same time I can’t say that thg is the same as 1984 when it comes to target audience because 1984 doesn’t make the ugly dystopian themes more accessible using the love story/teenage protagonist etc;

at this point the problem is: if you only ever read ya and nothing else in your life (which is what a lot of people here do - guys again when I got here in 2011 if people didn’t discuss hp they discussed john gr/een, the only *adult*-aimed book I see discussed on tumblr is asoiaf... because of got X°DDD) then you end up seeing every other piece of literature expecting what you do out of a young adult and then you expect adult literature out of young adults/ya to approach certain implications the way an adult novel would, which is... frankly ridiculous;

specific examples: I see blogs which are principally about like ya fantasy books ie acotar or shadow/hunters or whatever shitting on grrm because AAAAH HE’S PROBLEMATIC/MISOGYNIST/HE HAS VIOLENCE AND RAPE IN THE BOOKS BLAH BLAH and like... spoilers: if I wrote a fantasy series aimed at fourteen year-olds who want their fantasy romance with the hot dark guy who is maybe a tiny bit problematic but turns their leaf for them I would hold back on blood and violence, if I wrote a fantasy for adults where I want to be realistic about misogyny I will not, and the fact that grrm gets judged on what happens and not how he writes it (and again, saying that a guy who has 1/3rd of his pov characters female except that it’s actually 50/50 because there are no throwaway povs except for mel while guys have a lot more of them and all the female povs have narrative weight [and mel has it before she gets one] and all of them have a different personality and he also has the same trope [brienne and arya] in two people with wildly different personalities and needs which is basically a goddamned miracle is a misogynist because there’s misogyny in his fantasy world is ridiculous imvho) which is.... exactly expecting of asoiaf what you’d expect out of acotar, when grrm and acotar’s writer write for wildly different audiences. now, if I had read acotar at 15 and asoiaf at 15 I’d have had no doubt re asoiaf being more my thing because again the subgenre acotar goes for is not my thing because I never related to that fantasy while brienne is my rep, but in general a 14yo girl who likes the acotar-like stuff will not care for grrm.... which is normal because grrm writes for adults of both genders, not teenage girls (I mean teenage boys also have their own subgenres for which the same rules are valid), and someone who likes percy jackson (aimed at both genders but like... pre-teens early teens) who doesn’t gaf for grrm won’t because it’s not aimed at them unless they like grrm for other reasons ie idk they realize that they relate to jon snow idk but you see my point, so like tldr that’s what I mean with if you only read ya you’ll expect adult writers to handle their themes like ya writers would and like... sorry but if I write stuff for adults I won’t feel the need to specify that the bad guy is B A D with neon lights because an adult should grasp that from the narrative, I don’t need to make sure it’s obvious bc it’s aimed at kids;

reverse: when I see people saying ‘the vampire diaries is problematic because it’s about people who are a hundred years old preying on teenage girls so we need to stop teenage girls from reading that kind of thing because it makes them think it’s okay to go with someone that much older than them’, we’re at the opposite problem in the sense that you’re asking a young adult novel what you would ask of AN ADULT NOVEL when there’s no point in it. like, a teenage girl knows perfectly that damon salvatore doesn’t exist and vampires don’t exist and werewolves don’t exist - the entire point of tvd is that she gets to fawn over the hot supernatural dude who changes for the better thanks to the female protagonist she most likely sees herself in and she gets to have a few nice fantasies about that which is like... normal for people who are developing their sexualities, most people wouldn’t actually want damon salvatore the way he’s exactly in canon irl because they know it’s a fantasy and so it should stay. like, sorry but as someone who watched the show because ian somerhalder is hot in her twenties and tried the first book and gave it up at page 30 because I couldn’t do it, I can 100% assure anyone that the biggest issues with tvd books are that the writing is really fucking bad (for my standards at least), with the tvd show that from S4 the writing spiraled downwards and no one wanted the magical vampire pregnancy witch twins ridiculousness, but none of the content actually was shit that anyone would take seriously like that and I wouldn’t expect tvd to approach that subject realistically. if I read a vampire book aimed at adults who actually wants to write such a relationship as creepy WELL YES OF COURSE I’D EXPECT IT TO BE OBVIOUS ABOUT IT BEING CREEPY, but if it’s aimed at freaking teenagers... it’s a fantasy and not really that deep, take it for what it is and let teenage girls enjoy thinking about smooching damon salvatore (or stefan or whoever) without assuming they need to be protected from Horrible Vampire Fiction™, same as no one goes bitching about unrealistic sex scenes in serialized romance books because people read them because they’re unrealistic and escapism, not because they expect nobel prize worthy exploration of themes from them;

now, ^^^^^^ would not happen if people actually read variedly and studied some decent lit analysis in school - but like, after I had to read I think at some point that of mice and men is ableist... THAT’S the damned point - with ya you can take a lot of the plot at face value, with adult lit you can’t and you have to see motivation beyond the action of the characters and you can’t do that if you only read books aimed at pre-teens/teenagers where obviously that’s... more spelled out than it would be in a book aimed at an adult audience;

that by the way also means wildly missing actual adult themes discussion in ya, because again, I haven’t read thg but from the two movies I’ve seen it’s fucking obvious that the whole thing is an anti us-classism commentary from how the districts are built to how the games are rigged to pretty much everything in the worldbuilding, but all the discourse I see on tumblr is about either the love triangle or katniss being miscast or president snow being a jerk and whatever else, but I never once saw anyone saying ‘heeeeey the people in katniss’ district are an in your face metaphor of poor people in the us of a belonging to certain categories while the first few districts are absolutely the 1% and the entire point of it is that she wants to tell you A CLASSIST SOCIETY IS BAD AND WILL LEAD TO REVOLUTIONS’, which to me was... like, glaring, it was literally what 90% of the entire thing was about and no one ever discusses it in a fandom-wide sense (I mean... I saw a bunch of hg posts back when the movies came out, I never saw this brought out), which... is a problem because it means that the moment people are put in front of a ya product that actually tackles that kind of issue.... they go and worry about the love triangle (which seemed to me the excuse to draw the people in the story) not about the social commentary, and like, maybe a twelve year-old won’t catch on the social commentary, a twenty-year old especially from the us should, and I don’t see that happening;

and sorry but that is because if you only engage with content aimed at a younger audience than your target first you assume that every piece of literature should be consumable/readable/enjoyable by a younger audience (and sorry but no, some of us don’t want to write stuff making sure teenagers like it) and then ask of actual ya media to cater to their *adult* needs and not to the needs of the target audience because wow obviously if you’re 25 you won’t want out of literature what you wanted at fourteen;

and this also is valid for children’s media because again, I’m cutting it short, but adults watching st/even universe and sending people death threats because they don’t agree with their opinion of a cartoon aimed at an audience that’s at moooostttt eight years old is a thing that shouldn’t even fucking exist, and if you think steven/universe is that important at an adult age you need to re-assess your priorities;

tldr: adults should not expect media aimed at kids/teens to cater to their interests and shouldn’t analyze it the way they’d analyze a piece of media aimed at an adult audience and should not presume that every piece of media should have the scope/schemes of medias aimed at kids/teens because some of us don’t want to read that.

now, I’ll leave you with a nice short anecdote which hopefully will further clarify what I mean and add to another point which would be, kids and teens don’t give a fuck about what you, an adult, do: when everyone was in a frenzy about my little pony back in 2013 or so I had to see a ton of posts like ‘AAAAAH MEN/BOYS WHO ARE INTO MLP ARE STEALING THE SHOW FROM YOUNG GIRLS HOW DARE THEY ENJOY IT WE NEED TO KICK THEM OUT’ with added people saying that a ten year old male kid who tried to kill himself bc his friends bullied him bc he liked mlp deserved it and the likes, my only thought was that... when I was 8-10 in elementary school and was actually the target for cartoons and stuff, sailor moon was the rage between all girls my age me included, we’d spend recess playing pretend (and I’d get stuck playing sailor mars bc no one wanted her, sad) and our hugest first world problem in existence was that we needed technically a mamoru and of course no self-respecting boy in elementary school would have admitted under death threats to watching sailor moon because it was a girls’ thing (aaaaah gender roles in the early-mid 90s, how fun) so everyone despaired because ofc no one wanted to play mamoru... and the few times any guy actually showed up like HEEEEY I WANNA DO IT BUT PLEASE DON’T TELL MY FRIENDS I LIKE SAILOR MOON we’d all be like OMG YOU’RE OUR NEW FAVORITE PERSON PLEASE YOUR SECRET IS SAFE because we couldn’t believe we found the magical boy™ who wanted to do it, and if anyone had told us that the kid in question was stealing sailor moon from us we’d have laughed in their face.

like.

kids don’t ask of media what you, an adult do, and it’s unfair of you, an adult, to ask children’s/ya media to cater to your damned interests, which are amply catered to by the tons of adult literature around which also forces you to push on your views and read more challenging things and to not read/watch stuff at face value, which is why I would really appreciate it if the amount of 20yo people on here who I consider adults engaged with more adult media and let themselves be challenged instead of just going back to ya/kids’ things, which are good for teens and kids and can be enjoyed by everyone but should not be the only goddamned genre you measure all other literature against because then you get people saying that lolita is pro-pedo when it’s exactly the goddamned contrary, but if you think that pov character = protagonist = good guy (which is... staple kids/ya stuff for obvious reasons) then you decide that humbert humbert is someone you’re supposed to root for. too bad that you’re not and the author was an actual csa victim so it’s a completely ridiculous reading that wouldn’t happen if you didn’t read lolita the way you read hp.

... okay, I’m done, sorry for how long this was, I hope it cleared things for good xD

[cheryyori]

SK8TERBOY - Skaterboy!Yeosang/Soft!Reader Social Media AU ft. side pairing: Seonghwa/OC

Genre: Pure fluff

Pairing: Seonghwa/OC

A.N. Uh bonus story because I love them so enjoy, also this took so long bc I just didn’t know how to end it but hopefully I ended right for you guys and kept adding more to it. 

This is just pure, sweet fluff (and maybe slightly suggestive? idk). Writing this made me very soft and weak even if I thought the writing wasn’t the best. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it! There’s a tiny bit of jealously on Seonghwa’s end bc I’m a tiny bit evil, but it ends up to leading to something cute ok.

Also Sumire speaking in tiny and being a flustered and shy bean is a constant thing throughout this and mentions of past badboy!Seonghwa cause I am weak.

Italics = Japanese

Summary: A nice date between Seonghwa and his adorable girlfriend, Sumire. With a lot of undisclosed (fluffy) feelings and an unexpected confession on his end.

Taglist: @philosopher-of-fandoms @mangobee @mingiibabieee @yourbunny-xxii​ @angelichris-b97 @yeosatinyngz @kimtae-bae​ @etherealskzs​

(let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for SK8TERBOY!)

Masterlist. 

Bonus. 

Seonghwa felt nervous as he walked up the doors of Sumire’s apartment. Today was the day he would take his lovely, cute girlfriend on a date. Granted this wasn’t the first time they went on a date, but it had been a while and he maybe he was feeling needy to spend a day with her and shower her with his affections despite the constant backlash and teasing he gets from his roommates.

Taking a deep breath, he gathered all the courage he could and knocked on the door, waiting for a few minutes before the door swung open. Sumire glanced up, staring at him behind her round-framed glasses as her hair was pulled back into a messy bun. He knew that she had yet to start getting ready since she was still wearing her sweater and some pajama pants on.

Cute, he thinks as he fought the urge the peck her lips. Her eyes lit up at the sight of him and gave him a small smile. Very cute, he thinks again.

“You’re early, I thought we were going to meet at the cafe?” She asked as she moved to the side to let him in. He stepped inside and took his shoes off and followed her.

“I know,” he said, “I was just too excited to wait that I decided to come here first.” A small mew was heard as he glanced down and saw the gray and white ragamuffin kitten pawing at his legs. With a smile, he reached down and picked up the kitten with ease, “Hey, Iroha,” he cooed as he pressed his lips to the kitten’s head.

“Don’t spoil her too much,” Sumire said, “She still needs to eat breakfast first,” she said and headed into the kitchen while he followed and took a seat by the dining table with Iroha settled on top of the table.

“Okay, okay,” he let out a small chuckle as he watched Sumire start to prepare Iroha’s meal. Usually, she would give Iroha her standard meal, but since they’ll be on their date for most of the day, Sumire decided to give her a special meal for being left alone with Yusung to watch over her.

Once she was done, she placed Iroha’s meal on her plate and called out to her, “Iroha, come and eat,” she cooed. Seonghwa placed Iroha down on the ground so the kitten wouldn’t hurt herself as she attempted to jump down from the tabletop and watched as the kitten made her way over to Sumire’s feet.

The sight itself made Seonghwa’s heart swell as he watched Sumire continue to coo at the kitten in her native tongue. He sneakily took his phone out and started to record the scene before him, wanting to replay the scene whenever he got the chance. It was just so domestic seeing her act like this, god it made him weak.

“Iroha, come and eat,” Sumire continues cooing as she led the kitten toward her own corner with a bowl of water and set the plate down. Seonghwa was practically cooing himself as he watched Iroha start eating while Sumire had a bright smile and pets Iroha’s back.

“Ugh, you’re being too loud,” a low voice grumbles as they all turned to see Yusung with his hair messier than usual as it was in all sorts of directions, although his eyes brightened when he saw Iroha. “Oh, Iroha-chan, are you ready to spend the day with uncle Sungie?” he asked as he went over to Sumire’s side.

“Don’t spoil her today while I’m gone, idiot,” she said as she nudged him with her shoulder.

“Ah how cold, you should have more faith in me, Sumi! I promise to take care of Iroha-chan while you’re out on your date with the best friend stealer,” Yusung pouted. 

“ ’Best friend stealer’?” Seonghwa frowned, “Wait, do you mean me?!” He gawked at Yusung.

“Who else would I be talking about? She’s my best friend and you stole her attention away from me,” Yusung mocked pouted as he held Iroha in his arms once the kitten finished eating as Sumire excused herself to her room to get ready.

“We’ve known each other since high school!” Seonghwa said, feigning hurt. It was true, despite that the two never really talked much with one another until recently.

“And it took you how many years to ask Sumi to be your girlfriend?” Yusung raised a brow at him. Seonghwa opened his mouth to argue, but close it as he felt his cheeks burning. He was the only person (not counting his annoying roommates and friends) to know how long he had been pinning after Sumire, but he had been too shy and nervous up until they were partnered by their literature professor last year.

He still thanks Professor Kim for the opportunity, allowing him to finally ask out the love of his life.

“Alright, touche,” Seonghwa muttered, glancing away from Yusung.

“Touche on what?” Sumire asked as she finished changing and walked over to them.

“Nothing, just talking about when we were in high school,” Seonghwa said. Yusung had a mischievous glint in his eyes as he decided to tease the hell out of Seonghwa now.

“Speaking of high school, remember when you dyed your hair blonde and got that lip piercing because you thought Sumi would notice you if you stood out more?” Yusung chirped, his usually teasing tone in his voice, “It was hilarious to see you attempt that bad boy persona too!” Seonghwa’s face now had a red hue across his cheeks as he stood up suddenly. He did not want to hear his taboo past especially with his girlfriend around.

“Okay! I think that’s enough reminiscing for one day!” He said as he grabbed Sumire’s hand and led her towards the door, “Come on, Sumi, let’s go don’t want to be late for our date, right?” He rushed out as he pushed her out the door.

“Good luck on your date love birds! Don’t do anything I would do! Especially you, lover boy!” Yusung snickered as he waved Iroha’s paws at them. Seonghwa glared at Yusung, mouthing the words ‘I’ll kill you if you say anymore!’ before closing the door.

Sumire had a small pout on her lips, tilting her head at Seonghwa, “What was that about?” she asked confused as to what Yusung was blabbing about. Seonghwa still had a slightly flushed face before shaking his head.

“It’s probably nothing, you know how he is,” he said. Sumire hummed as she paused before speaking up.

“You had a lip piercing?” She asked.

“Uh, well...” Seonghwa felt nervous as he glanced away from her stare, “I mean I used to...” He glanced over at her and almost let out a small gasp when she placed her hands on his cheeks. She leaned close, eyes squinting as her thumb ran over his lips. He shuddered as he parted his lips slightly as she continued to stare at his lips.

“It doesn’t look like you had one,” she mutters. 

“Y-you know, if you wanted an excuse to touch my lips, you could have asked,” he said. Despite the small stutter, he felt a sense of pride when she stared at him with wide eyes as her cheeks turned red and quickly moved away.

“Sorry!” She squeaked, “I was just curious when Yusung said you had a lip piercing before and-” she cuts herself off and turns away, placing her face in her hands, “Oh god, I’m sorry-”

Before she could continue, Seonghwa moved to face her and placed his hands on her cheeks, “You’re so cute when you’re flustered, babe,” he said as leaned down and pressed his lips against hers. Her cheeks were burning as she shut her eyes tights, too embarrassed to look at him when he pulled away.

“So? Did it feel like I had a lip piercing?” He asked with a teasing grin. 

“Ah! Shut up!” She shrieked and hit his arm repeatedly, “Forget I asked, I’m going back home now!” She turned to walk back into the apartment when Seonghwa wrapped his arms around her, preventing her from reaching the door.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” He said with a smile, suppressing his giggles, “Sorry, you just looked so cute, I couldn’t help but want to tease you for a bit.”

“How could you pull a Yusung on me,” Sumire pouted, “After all the times I defended you whenever you make a fool out of yourself in front of the others,” she faked a tear.

“Hey! I do not make a fool out of myself!” He protested.

“Last week you literally asked for the others’ permission to take me out on a date today,” She pouted, making him glance away sheepishly.

“Okay, okay,” he chuckled, “I guess maybe I do make a fool out of myself sometimes, but it’s all for you baby,” he said, but she continued to pout at him, “Stop pouting, what’s it gonna take for you to stop with the cute pouty lips?”

Sumire paused for a second before looking away shyly and muttered softly, “Maybe another kiss?” Seonghwa smiled, but he wanted her to say it again. Despite it being a year being with him, she still felt nervous and anxious around him when it comes to being affectionate, but Seonghwa never once pushed the pace of their relationship as he wanted her to be comfortable around him.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you,” he leaned closer to her, pressing his forehead against hers. Her cheeks were burning again as she nervously glanced away. 

“Hmm, maybe...another kiss?” She asked shyly. Seonghwa grinned, feeling his heart quicken.

“If that’s what it’ll take for you to quit pouting then...” he leaned forward, capturing her lips with his again. They stayed like this for a few more seconds before they heard a coo along with the sound of a flash going off.

Pulling away, they two looked over and saw Suzaku with a grin on his face as he held his phone out, “Aw, you two love birds are adorable,” he cooed.

“How long have you been there?!” Sumire gawked as the redness in her cheeks returned.

“Long enough to see you caress Seonghwa’s lips with your thumbs!” Suzaku giggled, “Didn’t think you had the guts to take the initiative first, Sumi-chan!”

“You saw that?!” She squawked.

“The whole thing, sweetie!” Suzaku snickered, “Don’t worry though, your senpai will make sure to keep it a secret from the others that you made the first move on your boyfriend-”

“Ah! Don’t say anymore!” Sumire cried as she covered her face, “Come on, Seonghwa we have a cafe to get to!” She rushed out as she tugged on the other’s arms, wanting to be as far away from here as possible now. Seonghwa chuckled as she hastily pulled on his arm to get away from the scene.

“Sure, babe, just give me a second,” he said letting her arm go as she started to walk ahead, he then turned to Suzaku with a shy smile on his face, “Um...so that picture you took...”

“Don’t worry lover boy, I’ll send you the picture right now,” Suzaku chuckled as he sent Seonghwa the picture of him and Sumire kissing. When Seonghwa glanced down at his phone, he felt his heart swell when he saw the photo. The two them in each others’ arms as they kissed, he wanted more moments like this with her. Oh god, he was so soft for her.

“Seonghwa, are you coming or what?” Hearing her voice, he bid his goodbyes to Suzaku and caught up with Sumire, heading towards the cafe to start their date with her hand in his.

Upon reaching the cafe, Sumire stared at the items on display. Her eyes practically sparkled at the cutely designed confections and bit her bottom lips.

“They all look so cute, I don’t know if I can take a bite out of them,” she whined. Seonghwa chuckled as he dragged her inside the cafe, following the waiter as he led the two to their seats. The whole time, Sumire’s eyes had a particular shine in them as she stared down at the menu.

“If you want, we can order one of each if you can’t decide,” Seonghwa suggested.

“R-really, but wouldn’t that cost a lot of money? And what if we can’t finish them?” She asked.

“It’s okay, the last few commissions I got paid me well, and if we don’t finish them we can bring them home for the others,” he said. Before she could protest, the waiter returned to take their order, which Seonghwa gave him asking for one order off their dessert menu. When the waiter left, Seonghwa turned to her and gave him a grin, interlocking his hands with hers.

“Seonghwa you really didn’t have to do that,” she said.

“I know, but you looked liked you really wanted to try them, so there’s no harm in spoiling you for a bit,” he said. Her cheeks were flushed again, making her look away nervously. This was all still new, trying to be affectionate in public but she was slowly getting comfortable.

“O-okay,” she muttered, it wasn’t long before their order arrived, making her forget her worries as she stared at them in awe. Her hands were clutching her phone as she took pictures of the ones she thought were the cutest before taking a small bite from one of the strawberry flavored desserts and let out a satisfied hum. The whole time Seonghwa smiled as she cooed over the adorable designs and colors before she gushed over the taste. His eyes noticed a stray bit of frosting on the bottom of her lips.

“Is it any good?” He asked, leaning closer to her.

“Yes, do you want to try it?” She asked, about to cut a small piece for him, before she could do that, he leaned over and kissed her lips. A squeak left her lips as she felt his tongue run along her bottom lips. When he pulled away, he licked his lips and smiled.

“Taste sweet, just like you,” he teased with a sly grin. Smooth bastard. Her eyes stared at him before she smacked his arm again earning another fit of laughter from him as he moved away.

“Are you trying to kill me! Is that what you’re planning!” She whined, covering her face from his gaze. As soon as his laughter died down, he moved closer to her again and move her hands.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he apologized again, “It’s just that you’re too cute as always, it’s unfair,” he pouted as he used his hands to smush her face together. Her nose crinkled in annoyance, making her look even cuter in his eyes. He pressed his forehead against her, noses pressed together as he jutted his bottom lips out, “You’re not mad are you?”

She paused, glancing away, “No, just a bit startled and embarrassed,” she said. He grinned as he kissed her again, the lingering taste of strawberry on her lips made him hum. He could feel her cheeks heat up in his hands as he pulled away to get a better look at her. Her face was red as she had her eyes shut tightly.

“Aw, don’t do that, I want to see your face,” he cooed. Sumire didn’t know how to react, she was teetering between hiding and screaming her lungs out, but fortunately settled on the former and brought her hands to her face again.

“My face doesn’t want to be seen,” she mumbled, struggling to find her voice, “Can we just eat in peace?” she asked in a tiny voice, peaking at him between her fingers. Seonghwa internally cooed as she stared at him shyly. Just the sight of her being so cute and shy made him want to tease her more, but the side of him that was pretty much whipped for her every command won out in the end.

“Alright,” he said as he leaned back into his seat, taking a bite of his dessert. They went back to the normal, talking about their day and giggling at the jokes and what their roommates did while holding each others’ hands as they ate. Sometimes Seonghwa would feed her a spoonful of his order in her mouth, watching as her eyes widened at the taste and smile.

Seonghwa only stared at her with a smile, “So pretty,” he hums as he leaned against his palms. By now, he’s forgotten about the rest of the confections they ordered and decided to watch the gleeful expression on Sumire’s face, admiring how she would place on hand on her cheeks and close her eyes as she took her time to relish in the flavor of the dessert in her mouth. Three little words were sitting on the tip of his tongue, ready to be blurted out but he refrained.

Sumire glanced back at him, noticing the way he stared at her, it made her heart jumped out of her chest, “W-what is it?” She asked in a small voice, nervously biting her bottom lips.

“Nothing,” he replies, “You’re just really pretty, babe,” he grins and Sumire had to look away to calm herself and her rising heartbeat. This man, he was too powerful and he knows it.

“Jeez, you’re really planning on killing me, huh?” She whined again. The audacity of this man, she thinks, because who was he to say she was pretty when he looked like that?!

The thought of someone who looked so pretty and sinfully handsome like Seonghwa thinking that she was pretty seemed surreal to her. She wanted to metaphorically throw herself out the window and cry/scream. Her heart was beating to fast at his words, this damn smooth bastard!

“I would never,” Seonghwa protested, “You mean too much to me,” he added, “Besides, I’ve waited too long for this, there’s no way I’m letting you go so soon, babe.”

Hearing the last statement surprised her, “What do you mean ‘too long’?” She asked. Seonghwa paused, realizing his little slip-up and sighed before feeling his cheeks heat up. He didn’t want to talk about something so embarrassing.

“Uh. well...” he fidgeted in his seat nervously, avoiding eye contact with her for the first time since they entered the cafe,”M-maybe next time, I’ll tell you,” he mutters, a bit embarrassed. She frowned, brows knitted together as she took in his words.

“So, never, right?” She raised a brow at him.

“No, not never!” He said, “Just not now, maybe in the future when we’re mar-” he shut his mouth immediately. She looks back at him even more curious now.

“In the future?” She asked.

“N-nothing!” he panics for a second, almost making another slip-up, one more disastrous than almost admitting he had a long-time crush on her since the first year of high school. He cleared his throat, attempting to calm himself, “Oh, it looks like you’re done eating right? We can take the rest home for the others, I’ll go let the waiter know right now!” He stood up as he pressed a kiss to her cheeks and left before she could continue to press him for answers.

Sumire only frowned, watching as he left for the main desk and sighed, “What was that about?” She wondered, taking one last bite of her cake. Her mind started to wander, thinking about the way he stopped himself from speaking. What was that about, she thought. 

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard the chair scrape against the tiles. She assumed that it was Seonghwa returning from paying for their date, “Oh, you’re back already? That was fast...” her voice trailed off as she glanced up.

Seonghwa huffed. He didn’t expect that there would be a short line to pay for their order, although he managed to grab a few boxes and bags for the leftovers. He glanced down at his watch, noticing the time and rushed over to Sumire, he still had more plans for this date. 

”I paid for the cakes, babe. Are you ready to go-” he stopped as he glanced up from his watch to see the scene before him. 

Sumire sat back in her seat, leaning far away from the table an unknown man sitting across from her. Her hands were placed stiffly in her lap as she stared at her phone, pretending to text someone with a disinterested look on her face. He immediately recognized the leech before her from their campus. A real bastard that liked to play around with girls’ feelings for the hell or it.

“Oh, fucking hell no,” he mutters as he quickly went over them, more worried about the uncomfortable state Sumire was being put into and how it was affecting her. The closer he got, the more clearly he could hear their conversation.

“Hey, I remember seeing you on campus,” he said, leaning forward as he pushed the cakes away. A small whine left her lips as she saw the cake being mushed against a perfectly untouched one. What a waste, she frowns. “What’s a nice girl doing here by yourself?” He asked.

“Enjoying some cake, what else?” She was surprised to hear how even her voice was and took a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves as nails started to prick at her own skin on her fingers.

“Oh, you’re a sassy one, huh? Cute,” Somehow hearing that made her want to pour her drink on him, but she refrained. The small thought of lashing out in public only to be stared at by others with disapproving stares made her on edge, but also because she had some restraint on her actions.

“Hm,” she only let out a disinterested hum instead, eyes staring back at her phone.

“So is it just you?” He continued probing, earning an annoyed glare from her because that was the dumbest question she ever heard asked her. “If you want, I can join you if you’re feeling lonely.”

“No, thanks,” she replied, curtly, “I’m not alone actually.”

“Oh, are you here with a friend? She can tag along with us, the more the merrier,” He said. Her lips twitched, eyes glancing back up at the idiot before her before making eye contact with Seonghwa, who had been glaring at the man before him. She let out a small relieved sigh and smiled slightly at him, all the anxiety she felt just moments ago suddenly lifted a bit.

“Yeah, I am with a friend,” she started, “My boyfriend actually,” she added, a bit loudly. Seonghwa’s eyes lit up, his heart jumping in his chest upon hearing those words. For a second, a small smile was seen on his face before he saw the pleading look in her eyes to save her from this situation.

“Oh? Really? Where is he? I don’t see him,” he said, almost mocking her. And just like that, Seonghwa had a dark look in his eyes and let out a dry chuckle. Seeing that look gave her chills, it was the first time she had seen him have such an expression and she didn’t know if it was good or bad (she thinks the latter actually since she feels slightly intimidated). What happened to her cute, soft, and dork of a boyfriend?! Who was this man before her?!

“Turn around,” Seonghwa said in a low voice. Hearing him, they turned to see Seonghwa with a smile on his face, “Now you see him.” He went over to Sumire’s side and place his hands on her shoulder, giving them a light squeeze to calm her nerves.

“Was he bothering you, baby?” He asked, leaning close to her ear, sneakily pressing a kiss to her cheeks as his eyes flickered back to the man across from them. 

He smirked as the other man flinched from the dark look in his eyes and glanced away nervously, he guesses that maybe his reputation back in high school did have its perks. The kiss Seonghwa gave her made her mumble incoherently as she struggled to find her words, although among the mess he heard a faint yes and that was all he needed to hear.

“Okay,” he says as he brought her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckle, “Let’s go then,” he said softly, the familiar soft look in his eyes returned as he helped her up, “I have more plans for this date anyways,” he added with a coo as he pressed another kiss to her cheeks, attempting to distract her and it worked. 

The familiar red hue on her cheeks appeared as she let out a squeak. The usual dorky grin on his lips appeared as he helped her out of her seat, and led her away from the scene, “Come on, I want to spoil you as much as I can before the day is over,” he said leaving the cafe.

Once they were away, he took a deep breath and stopped before he turned towards her, “Are you alright?” He asked. Sumire blinked, her lips pressed together in a thin line as she furrowed her brows together.

“I-I think so?” She wasn’t certain herself, “Maybe a bit uncomfortable, but then I saw you and felt slightly relieved knowing you were there,” she explained, “Although that look on you had when you glared at him was kinda scary,” she admitted. Seonghwa paused, a wave of guilt in his chest knowing that he scared her slightly, “I didn’t know you could make such a face, it was kinda jarring to see.”

“Sorry,” he said in a low voice, “I promise I won’t make that face around if it makes you uncomfortable,” he said. Sumire glanced up at him seeing the serious expression on his face.

“U-uh, no it’s fine, I wasn’t uncomfortable,” Intimidated, yes, but not uncomfortable she thinks, “I was just wondering where you learned to make such a face.” Seonghwa pursed his lips, wondering if he should tell her, his eyes glanced down at her and noticed how her eyes were staring back up at him with curiosity.

Damn her for being too cute without trying, he thinks before relenting.

“Uh, well...” Seonghwa trailed off, his hand tightening around hers, “You could say I had a bit or a...rebellious stage when I was younger...” he replied. Sumire stared at him for a few seconds, letting his words sink in.

He heard a snort and glanced back at her with wide eyes, “S-sorry, but you had a rebellious stage?” She suppressed the giggles that escaped from her lips. Despite what he said, Sumire couldn’t see it, perhaps it was because she was used to this Seonghwa before her. She didn’t know how he was when he was younger, perhaps she didn’t need to unless it involved any crimes and Seonghwa seemed too soft to be involved in such things.

“W-why does that sound so hard to believe for you?” He was embarrassed as she only let out another fit of giggles. He just admitted a great taboo of his past and here she was making fun of him for it.

“S-sorry, but you just seem like too much of a cute dork now for me to picture you having a rebellious stage! You’re too soft, sweetie,” she said.

“That's because I matured! I grew out of it!” He protested, feeling his cheeks heat up. She giggles once more.

“Alright, I guess that’s a valid excuse,” she said. Her mood was significantly better than before, “You said you have more places to take us right?” She asked, turning back to glance at him. 

Seonghwa smile as he took a moment to watch as he admired the way the sunlight cascaded down on her. The light shining as she stared up at him with a smile on her soft lips. He felt his breath stolen from his lung as he unconsciously spoke the words on his mind.

“I love you.”

Her eyes stared at him, surprised to hear those words come out of his lips. It seemed like he too was surprised with himself as he quickly used one hand to cover his mouth, staring at her with wide eyes as well.

“W-what?” She asked in a small voice, feeling her face starting to heat up again. This was the first time he had said he loved her. Sure they texted each other that, but it was a whole different experience hearing it out loud in person. She felt her whole heart jumped from her chest and had to force herself to calm down.

“I-uh,” he tripped over his words unsure what to do to take them back, but he couldn’t. He didn’t want to take them back. Seonghwa knew that he was in love with her from the very beginning. Seonghwa sucked the air between his teeth and sighed. The cat was already out of the bag anyways.

“Fuck it,” he muttered as he took her face in his hands, she jumped and stared back at him, feeling smaller than usual as he leaned in close.

“Y-yes?” She replied in a tiny voice, nervous as he stared at her with such intensity in his eyes. It was making her face feel hotter than before, she was sure he could feel them in his hands.

“I love you, Sumire. You don’t have to say anything, but I wanted you to know that I love you so much and how much I’ve been holding back from saying them for so long.”

Her mind was a mess. Seonghwa just admitted he loved her and that he was holding back from saying them. Wait, for how long had he been keeping those words to himself?!

“I know that hearing this is overwhelming for you, and you probably don’t feel the same-”

“No!” She suddenly shouted, surprising him. “I-I,” her voice trailed off, feeling anxious as she realized what she was about to do. “I-I love you too...”

“You do?” The way his eyes lit up and how he gave her a warm smile was too much for her fragile heart, but she was certain that she had strong feelings for him and nodded.

“Yes, I love you, Park Seonghwa,” she said, glancing away from him as she felt that her heart will explode if she looked him in the eyes. 

Seonghwa continued to stare at her before leaning closer to her, “Can I kiss you?”

Her cheeks flared up, wondering why he was asking now, “Since when do you ask to kiss me now?” She muttered. A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. Sumire was taken aback, this kiss was different from the ones they had in the past.

His lips moved against hers, his tongue grazing against her bottom lips. Feeling his tongue made her gasp as he used this moment to deepen the kiss. Her eyes shut tight and hands gripped against the front of his shirt as her face burned throughout the kiss. A low groan was heard from him as her teeth accidentally grazed his lips causing him to pull away from her and move his lips downwards.

When his lips moved down to her jaw, she sucked the air when he started to nibbling and sucking on her skin, “W-wait, wait!” She gasped, her voice going a pitch higher than before, and pulled away with a red face. 

Seonghwa glanced up at her, with a frown as he was enjoying how they were slowly moving along in their relationship, but then wondered if he overstepped with the kiss. “Was it too much?” He asked.

“No,” she said, eyes glancing everywhere but him, “It’s just...” she trailed off, biting her bottom lips nervously, feeling her lips tingling from the kiss, “I-isn’t this dangerous territory?!” She asked, glancing around them.

Dangerous territory? Seonghwa suppressed to urge to laugh. It was cute that she thought this was on the more intense side of a relationship. Granted, he was certain that this was the first they had made out with each other like this.

“Don’t worry babe,” he said, pressing his lips on her nose, “I wouldn’t go that far if it makes you uncomfortable, unless...” his voice trailed off as he glanced back down at her with half-lidded eyes and a smirk, “Unless you want me to?”

She let out a startled squeak and punched him when she heard the teasing tone in his voice, “I’m going home!” She said as she turned back in the direction of her apartment, doing her best to hide her flushed face from him.

“I’m kidding, kidding!” Seonghwa chuckled as he wrapped his arms around her, “You’re too cute to tease,” he said, “And you can’t leave yet, there’s still light out and I still haven’t spoiled you as much today!”

“If you keep teasing me, you’ll have to enjoy this date on your own!” 

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry, now come on, love!” He said, tugging her toward their next destination. Sumire sighed, letting him drag her off to who knows where, although she would have to admit she did like the fluttering feeling in her chest when he called her love. Not that she would ever tell him because then there would be no end to it.

He suddenly stopped, turning back to her again, “What?” She asked, raising a brow at him. He smiled and let out a low hum as he shrugged.

“Nothing, I just really happy and I love you.”

Okay, maybe her heart won’t get used to him saying that anytime soon, but she was happy regardless and she was glad that it was her cute boyfriend that made her feel like this.