#idk i'm just…sad
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Feeling depressed again.
#idk i'm just…sad#not about anything in particular#but it's still there#my heart feels heavy and i don't want to get out of bed and do anything today#the star child speaks#negative#don't reblog this
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reblog to give ur mutuals a soft lil kissy on the head
#i can't reblog this from everyone so this is just me giving all my mutuals a soft lil kissy on the head#if u see this#*muah*#soft lil kissy on the head#and if u don't want one u can have a head pat#or i can lovingly send soft lovey vibes your way#all options are valid#idk i just#need to spread some love today#i'm tired and sad and stressed#so i'm giving u all some love#bc i need to fill myself with more of it#love u all hope u have/are having a good day#mutuals#not stargate
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Liam was a boy, and then a man, who suffered so much trauma and pain. He was bullied as a child and then lived a nightmare that I think none of us can really imagine of having that triggering experience replicated on a literally global public scale. He became a man who inflicted trauma on others. He was an addict who was unable to find a way out of that disease, and now never will, but who was open and vulnerable about his struggles. He was an incredibly talented musician and artist and an absolutely integral part of one of the most important bands of a generation; his voice and songwriting and skill in the studio shaped every aspect of what One Direction became at their best. He loved that band and being a part of that experience with his whole being and would never have stopped celebrating what they meant to us and to the world. He had problems and did bad things; that doesn't mean he was a bad person who didn't deserve to be loved and helped to heal- everyone deserves that- and the fact that that's not something that can ever happen now is devastating. I was very distressed by many of his actions; and I cared deeply about this man I didn't know and wished for better for him than this outcome.
I'm so deeply, deeply SAD tonight. I'm sad for Liam, who will never now have the chance to look back on this hard time and reflect on how far he's come, and for Liam's family, for his parents and his sisters who loved and supported him so much, and for everyone in the 1D band family and circles. And I'm sad for us. It feels like nothing will ever be quite the same, and that's hard and sad and shocking. It's a special kind of doubled grief, to mourn the loss of the person, and also of what he meant to us in this strange world of parasocial fanning, for the real him and also for the version of him that we made up and attached so much meaning to and for the escape that brought us. For him, and also for the easy uncomplicated joy of listening to those beautiful songs from happier times, which might never feel the same again. For the other boys, who we love so much and wish we could shield from suffering and loss and pain. For our fellow fans, who we also worry about the impact of this on. Everything about this is terrible, and I am sending so much love out to all of you. We are not alone, and it's okay to feel complicated emotions and it's okay to mourn and it's okay to care about how it effects you and your life, whatever you're feeling- it's okay. We are here with you. We are 1D family.
#liam#is there any point to this? other people are saying plenty of things#maybe there are enough things#but idk#liam or liams team were the closest this blog every came to any of the boys... things happened more than once#that I was like oh shit they're reading these posts#it made me feel extra close to him and it made me feel like I wanted to say something#but he'll never check his mentions again now#whats the point#I'm just SAD#but here's one more post to add to the mix anyway. Liam you were difficult- but you were loved#you were bullied in a nearly unimaginable way but you were also loved on a scale that is nearly incomprehensible#anyway#hi everyone#miss you love you#this is an ot5 blog always#I may not always like or support the choices they make; but they are always family yk?
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here is the life i've always longed for.....!!
#idk i just like this picture#sometimes when i'm sad i try to look at the city thru the eyes of my 13 year old self and everything becomes magical again#personal#nyc#op
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quite the poet, quite the inspo
#its a two parter but i'm not sure if i want to upload both bc the first one goes miles better and it was initially a standalone#bc twt format that builds the humor up lol but its still cute anyway so i'm putting both up#it's really sweet and sad Xiao hasn't much of an outlet to let things go and expressing thoughts than his coping mechanisms#the self destruction he's not aware about as it's veiled by reason of duty#so it's good that he's encouraged to use poetry as one of it#expression portrayed through words tailored in vagueness but also direct symbolism of something... just to encapsulate that meaning idk idk#qiiarts#xiao#lumine#traveler#paimon#zhongli#venti#hu tao#chongyun#xingqiu#diona#mika#noelle#genshin impact
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ryomina demons are winning
#does anyone here like them idk. theyre funny#putting off finishing p3re to draw these so i don't have to be sad just yet#cat’s art#ryomina#ryoji mochizuki#makoto yuki#minato arisato#p3#persona 3#p3re#p3 reload#sorry for traditional sketch stuff... idk i just feel like i do better on paper even tho its literally the same style#like i can just get the lines better on paper. i think my brush is probably too thick digitally if i'm having this problem lol#makoto makes me so emo u guys have no idea. i didn't quite get this guy in the beginning but now...#full force understanding of a character. hes. he :( (incoherent sobbing)#tag ramble again SORRY I UEBRO4Y39NRMFMT#oh yeah the period thing going around is so funny. PERSONA 3 PERIOD SIMULATOR
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#sorry for two sad posts in a row (I'm not sorry)#idk was in the mood for some tears and bloodshed just girl stuff#I'm not paying for your therapists until you pay for mine#sebaciel#kuroshitsuji#black butler#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#my art#sketch
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been thinking a lot abt fwb!gojo today.... this is his first time ever doing this kind of a thing btw. i do not think he sleeps around AT ALL. but with you, he just... you start off as very good friends but then it keeps escalating – you start sitting closer and closer, your thighs always touching as you lounge on the couch. his hands seem to always find your waist in public, your seem to be in his hair more and more. and the thing is... satoru isn't all that good at deciphering his own feelings. he isn't entirely sure what this is; the butterflies in his stomach whenever you laugh at his jokes, the warmth that spreads under his skin whenever he sees you bend over. it's weird. he doesn't know what to do.
so, when one night you inch closer with your hand on his thigh, he lets you. he welcomes you with open arms. you ask whether it's okay or not and he lets out a shaky yes, his cheeks burning with something new, his eyes low and heavy as he stares at your lips. you feel so good on top of him, your body flushes to his and he thinks about how perfect this is. how much he likes it. the night is like a wet dream for him, something he's always dreamed off but when you leave the bed and hop into the shower without giving him a kiss, he doesn't even know what the weight on his heart means. where it comes from. he doesn't ponder over it for too long though as you step outside the bathroom in a shirt way too big, his shirt. he watches you get dressed and hums when you joke about his bed hair. he thinks you look gorgeous. he doesn't ask for you to stay – if this is what you want, to leave without the desire to continue your adventures from the last night, then so be it. satoru wants you to be happy. you tell him it was good and that you'd like to, perhaps, do it again and he can taste you on his tongue when he says that he feels the same. satoru will take every crumb you'll give him with a smile on his face. he won't complain and he won't ask for more, not yet at least. for now, he'll be completely and utterly at your mercy, a lapdog for you to play with whenever you so desire to do. a selfless kind of love.
#this might not be everybody's satoru i realize#but idk i think he's a lonely boy who doesn't know how to deal with his feelings#he really does like you and he wants your attention#he wants your love#he just . doesn't know how to ask for it#idk ok this is also wordvomit#but yeah sad little meow meow satoru who just wants to do everything and anything for you#he's kind of a knight in this#selfless type of love yk#even got the dog motif in lmao#okok i'm sleepy so idk if any of this even makes sense just bear with me yeah#(the bear is very calm and friendly please relax)#mickey is daydreaming#angel boy#gojo x reader
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I am not who I was
Alt Version:
It's been a while since I drew Chris prior to Decoded... Also this rendering is ass, I am not good at shaDING ASJDAKDS
#wild kratts#littlecrittereli#chris kratt#wk reprogrammed au#reprogrammed au#wild kratts fanart#wild kratts au#ah yes the good ol days when there was just some weird lion guy and mind control to worry about#I'm thinking about writing some short one shots about the 3 month timeskip at the end of reprogrammed but idk#I NEED TO FINISH DECODEWD FIRST IM PROCRASTINATING CAUSE I DONT WANT IT TO END IM GONNA BE SO SAD
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weird little guy
#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#valyrianscrolls#joffrey baratheon#my art#idk I just wanted 2 draw baby joffrey being weird and offputting. likely place for him to be#when you're so mad at your dad you dissect his fursona#I <3 giving asoiaf characters cute little plushies of their house sigils idc if it's anachronistic#little baby joffrey makes me sad to think about he's my eraserhead baby...I could be a good mother...I could still save him :(#ok maybe not but I could definitely be a better father than robert I'd give him litte pats on the head and say 'I'm proud of you sport'#I could not save him but I could love him </3
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I understand Garp, I truly do. But personally if my grandson were about to be executed just for existing after years of asking himself if he deserves to live, idk, I think I would've gone on a fucking rampage and had killed everybody
#i understand garp but i understand garp haters#and then luffy blamed himself for what happened like no baby the one who should've protected you didn't#don't come at me saying he was too deep in the marines and he was being cautious and responsible#'he literally told them to hold him back or else he'd kill everyone' i know i watched it#i'm just saying that i would've liked it if he had tried to kill somebody idk#no hate to garp but also yes hate to garp it depends on the day and how sad i am about ace at the time#one piece#monkey d. garp#portgas d. ace
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One of my first digital pieces (2010) versus one of my recent ones (2024)
We all start somewhere!
#picked these cause they're in a similar pose lol. i mean not at all. but sort of... more than my other art at least...#oh fuck im so tired im saving this to drafts and coming back later#my anxiety meds wipe me the fuck out so im trying not to take them in the day#and they're like legit borderline a sleeping med for me. i take one and in 30 mins im OUT.#so I'm. i mean i was already only taking 1-2 in the day and then 2-3 at night#anyways it makes me sad when people say they dont have an artistic bone in their body#and especially when they say they could never draw like me :(#dont put yourself down to lift me up! i don't want my art to be used for you to be mean to yourself!!!#lots of experiences of people comparing themselves to me and being mean to themself...#feels bad. it's okay if you're slow it's okay to be learning it's okay!!!#I'm me and you're you and we're here to learn from each other. i just wanna hang out..#y'know what I'm just gonna post without saying anything i WILL forget I made a draft#i have so many things i intend to post and then forget#it's a wonder I post anything#i only do it when i get bored. and run out of stuff to scroll through#like whelp. guess if i want a post I have to make one myself.#also the second one is really good idc that it's a study i still drew it#art growth#this was in 2010 btw#i started highschool in 2011#I've grown a lot and you can too.#also I've never really been one to dislike my old art. like idk I was trying... if it's bad I just won't look at it whatever#like i wouldn't be mean to someone else who made that so i don't get a free pass to be mean just cause it's to me#man my thoughts are bungled. okay sleep time#if my phone made typos you didn't see it
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don't you just love it when a series has a good ending that takes care of all of its characters, shows how their futures will look like, ties up all loose ends, reminisces about old times, references important moments from before, and brings back elements of the very first episode, giving a nice frame to the whole series?
#these are the kind of shows i love to rewatch#i just finished queer as folk and i may or may not be sobbing on my bed at 1am on a saturday#i wish justin was there in that final babylon scene too even if just for a moment#but other than that i'm good and i loved it#this also goes for so many other shows i love#queer as folk#elementary#leverage#sense8#revenge#idk i'll add to this when i can think of more#eg rambles#a million little things#fuck it i liked the ending okay?? as sad it was it fit the show#ted lasso#though i guess now that they announced s4 ted lasso no longer qualifies#black sails#the librarians#the good place
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After Angband, Maedhros had a complicated relationship with his hair for a long while. The thing he once used to cherish and carry with pride, inherited from the mother he had left behind, was now tainted with memories of unwanted attention and derogatory touch.
After his rescue, it had to be cut short for the sake of his recovery, and he could never quite figure out whether he was more hurt or relieved by the act. It was Fingon, during those times filled with anxiety and doubt and shame, who helped him learn to accept his own appearance again– from the stump of his right arm and the scars littered across his freckled body to the locks of copper hair, ever so slowly regrowing to their former glory.
And little by little, the lingering memories of malevolent hands harshly yanking at his scalp were replaced by the feeling of tender hands carefully braiding familiar golden ribbons into his hair, once again beloved.
#so basically#they are in love and i love them very much#just don't think about how during the peaceful days of valinor they used to spend days just sitting around and braiding each other's hair#and after his rescue maedhros could never do that again#or maybe curufin–#after seeing his brother moping around all day sad because he could no longer braid his bf's hair#–engineered his a prosthetic hand to help him do just that#who knows not me#fun fact i spent all day yesterday drawing this-- no literally i didn't do anything else please send help#the silmarillion#silmarillion#maedhros#nelyafinwe#maitimo#russandol#fingon#findekano#russingon#why do they have to have so many names my god#maedhros x fingon#fingon x maedhros#silmarillion fanart#russingon fanart#maedhros fanart#fingon fanart#idk what to tag here i'm gonna be honest#art#my art
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Fascinating how Polites, the character who is the personification of Odysseus' optimism and is only in 5 songs, is more grieved and appreciated than Eurylochus, a character who is his own person and is in 11 songs.
#I'm being a hater but meh :/ it's just kind of baffling to me. Don't get me wrong. Polites plays his purpose for the musical#and it is neat how Jay took one line from him in the Odyssey and got silly with it and basically created his own character.#but like... All we know about Polites is that he's nice... that's literally it. He's Odysseus' optimism personified. which is why he died.#And it's not as though it isn't sad that he died. It's just that we got to know Eurylochus longer and truly get to know him more#is it because with how little people know about Polites other than “uwu sweetiepie” people like that so they can headcanon more?#is it because Eurylochus is “too complex” and therefore “not likable”??#idk. I'm gonna be burned at the stake for this I know it. but I don't understand it.#like during “Love in Paradise” it wasn't “Open Arms” that made me sad. It was “How much longer...” and “Waiting...” that made me sad#I mean I'm an “UwU sweetiepie” too (not right now though clearly lol) so maybe I'm “meh” about him because he's just “me”?#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#epic the musical#polites#eurylochus#hm. maybe I shouldn't tag this but I'm actually really kind of curious as to why people cling to him so much?
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do you ever have the feeling that you suffered something traumatic as a kid but you can’t quite figure out what it was?
#trauma#childhood#ptsd problems#memory#ana trigger#@na#ed not sheeren#notprojustusingthetags#i hate myself#i just want to be thin#i just want to be small#anorex14#anor3×14#tw depressing stuff#depressing shit#i'm sad#sadgirl#idk#idk what else to tag#idk what tags to add
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