#idk i just think it would have been funny and more time for sibling shenanigans

[hydr0phius]

Peridea looks like it would have fruit that looks like pretty rocks. You know those really crunchable but also gummy looking gemstone ones that the teacher had for math class? Like these but they have a rock looking skin.

Anyway, I think it would have been funny if Ezra just picked up a rock and started eating it while he was catching up with Sabine. Funnier if Thrawn saddles her with a bag of the rock fruits and Sabine thinks he's just being an asshole (which he is. He didn't tell her they were fruit and neither did Enoch) but she assumes they're important and Ezra finds them and is like "Oh, he gave you my favourite ones!" and Sabine is questioning everything about this planet and the Thrawn and Ezra situation and picks up what she thinks is a rock fruit and Ezra's like "Not that one."

[jamiethebeeart]

Danny Phantom AU for the League (explanation under the cut)

There's a common (?) idea in the phandom that Sam dyes her hair black (or that her mom bleach her hair from black) and asdfghj that fits so well for Dabi. I can also see him being edgy and wearing eyeliner (he would tightline and you can't convince me otherwise) and eyeshadow to piss off Endeavor. (You can hardly see it, but I promise he has purple eyeshadow under his eyes.) I've been thinking about it and I'm not sure how Natsuo, Fuyumi, and Shoto would fit into this AU. Cousins? Maybe just siblings, and ignore Sam's only child-ness.

LINK (X) ok so I have drawn this before and I stand by Hana as Jazz and Tenko/Tomura as Fenton/Phantom. :)))) Danny's hair in the og art style makes no damn sense. Many an artist has bemoaned it (me included), so I decided to make Shigaraki's also confounding. (it's like??? a mullet???? but the mullet has layers????) Danny having Lichtenberg figure scars has recently had a resurgence in phandom and it's the perfect excuse to keep the scars around Shigaraki's mouth/eyes. (To symbolize the "scary eyes" and ghost sense.) Shigaraki gets to keep Danny's whole "getting new powers every time he needs to" shtick: one - because it's funny and two - it ties into the whole AFO quirk plotline. SPEAKING OF. AFO gets to take Vlad's place :)))) except!!! I think it'd work better if AFO was a "friend" of Tenko's grandmother and that's how he's weaseled his way into the family. No Vlad wanting Maddie and killing Jack subplot. Just AFO up to his usual shenanigans. I'm on the fence about whether or not Dabi would secretly be a kickass gamer (Sam was, but only kept it a secret because of 2000s misogyny about girls playing games.... idk how that'd transfer to Dabi other than Dabi trying to maintain a "too cool for that" image....)

(Hana as Jazz. Jazz loves her brother and tries to support him but is also overbearing and ignores what he says in favor of what she wants. I feel like an older Hana would fit into that well.... not that we know much about Hana, but from what can be gathered I think it'd fit. And Danny wanted a dog! Eventually has Cujo tagging along! Also a very good mirror for Mon and Tenko.)

Tucker! Spinner! my loves!!!! I wasn't sure originally if I wanted Spinner to be a ghost or a human, but as we can see I plopped him in Tucker's role. Because it fits so well. (I still vividly remember the post about "who loves Danny more? Valerie or Sam. the answer: neither, it's Tucker. Savant Par and Spinaraki mimicing the much larger fanbase for Amethyst Ocean and Shigadabi) Also, Spinner getting to connect with Tenko over games (DOOMED) and technology. I imagine that Spinner wears a bandana to cover up his roots showing. I see Tucker as taking special care of his appearance, but I don't see where Spinner's like that, so he gets a lazier option :) Oooooh should I give Spinner glasses? ooooh I bet he'd have glasses, but never want to wear them because they'd make him look nerdy. Anyway, just like Tucker and Danny, Spinner would face his fears to help and support Shigaraki :))))) (crying over his devotion)

Other Characters:

Dash, Paulina, Kwan, and Star? Maybe Uraraka and Toga as Johnny 13 and Kitty? hehehee could be cute. the fights and getting back together and Toga having to blow off steam in the human world? Kwan befriends Sam and Tucker, so maybe Twice would fit into Kwan's role? OH!!! And then have Hawks be Dash. (I don't think anyone has ever shipped Sam and Dash but that's why this is an AU.)

Deku can be Poindexter.... cause bullying (asdfghj yea it sidelines Deku a bit and sticks him in a very minor role and is an easy choice, but!! some fics make Poindexter and Danny kind of friends!! I think that'd be a nice mirror to what Shigaraki and Deku could've been - along with the initial misunderstandings that Poindexter has about Danny mirroring the way that Deku had to learn more about Shigaraki.

Ember? Maybe as Compress.... he has the theatrics DOWN lmao. And Magne as part of the band perhaps? That'd be cute.

(I don't feel like I know enough about Mustard to put him in any specific role.....)

OOOH Bakugou as Dora! The Dragon Amulet transformation mirroring Bakugou's angry outbursts!

[honey-minded-hivemind]

I had…the weirdest thought/idea while reading through your mermay stuff. This can be h2o no au or just general mer shenanigans but…what if reader was allergic to shellfish/fish in general before becoming a mer/siren? Like- for h2o it just adds to the “ocean and fish bad” mindset and trauma reader has. But also when they become a mer that would bring up so many questions. (Do you think they’d become immune or just stay allergic bc the human part of them is still technically the same???)

When they become a mer they just suddenly have this urge to consume something that quite literally will kill them. When they eventually wind up with the yans and the caretakers try to feed them reader once again just sees it as an attempt on their life and not some caring gesture. The adults are so concerned and confused that their guppy won’t eat anything, but it doesn’t seem like a hunger strike they literally freak out when food is put toward their mouth. Maybe reader finally explains it and the adults are just CONFUSED.

“Reader please eat your food.”

“I can’t I’ll literally die.”

“…..what?”

If reader is still deathly allergic they become the mer equivalent of a vegetarian or idk marine animals are weird, if fate is kind reader is partially a type of sea creature that just filter feeds or something (ex: whale shark, or manta ray)

(Idk all of this is coming from the mind of someone who cannot eat fish, had a very violent reaction to it, and has been scared of it happening again ever since)

I’m curious what you think, does the moon pool just heal the immune response? Is reader only allergic while in a human form but fine to eat fish as a mer? Or is reader plunged into an even worse situation bc when the yans find out about the allergy they become 100x more protective, treating reader as the most fragile guppy on the planet that needs even more of their attention and care? Like- allergies aren’t a thing for mer so they don’t really understand it so they’re just like: “No Reader! If that fish gets near you you’ll die!” Imagine someone like Sabertooth being like that one uncle that’s like “you’re just faking it” or “that’s not a thing!”, playfully force feeds reader a crab or something and suddenly reader’s gills swell and they can’t breathe. That makes x2 murder attempts on reader by Sabertooth. And then from that point on everybody in the pod is traumatized by the experience, reader is even further from being assimilated, and the yan adults are so much more worried about their reluctant guppy.

Weird funny concept. This became so long, I am so sorry.

Been binge reading your work and I think it’s awesome! You’re a really creative writer, and I love everything I’ve read from you!

Idk how your anon system works

Call me rhino anon 🦏 if that’s available?

Oh wow! Okay, I have a family member who is also allergic to shellfish (I'm not sure about fish, but they're allergic to shellfish), and I hope you are okay after that experience, 🦏 Anon.

I can see it working as Reader is either immune as a mer but can't eat shellfish as a human, or as them being unable to eat, well, any seafood at all.

They're basically stuck eating seaweed, kelp, and/or filter feeding, and Reader isn't happy, and neither are the platonic yans, especially the adults. Their kid/sibling isn't eating, they're worried Reader will starve, and they want to help but are confused by being allergic to what is a sirens main diet.

If Sabretooth did force Reader to eat shellfish or fish, he'd be lucky, and so would Reader, if they didn't die or have a severe allergic reaction. Reader does however fear him even more after it, regardless of if they almost died or if they actually stomached fish for the first time in their life.

I think if Reader had to have a meat to eat, it would have to be sea birds or sea mammals. So, seagulls, albatross, terns, for birds... or seals, dolphins, or orcas for mammals... It's still a hassle, but it's worth it if Reader doesn't end up with anemia or sick from only being able to eat seaweed and kelp and seagrass...

The adult platonic yans at this point are having to fist fight or tail fight who is and isn't allowed near Reader as one of their main caretakers, because they need someone they will listen to yet have a chance of liking. Reader is scared of all of them, but some more than others, so it's best to pick the ones who haven't traumatized them, and go with the ones who at least they won't faint from seeing...

(Welcome to the platonic yandere X-Men club!)

[fudgetunblr]

I've been thinking a bit about what alternative beginnings of the season they could've given the siblings, and here's some ideas I've had:

Luther was always number one, not necessarily because he was the strongest but because he was always the one most willing to please and be there for Reginald. He cared about his siblings, but he also cared about following protocol more. I think he'd want to be a part of a team, and therefore maybe he works in construction or something. He's not as strong as he once was, showcasing a life without powers, while still giving him something that felt meaningful to him. It ain't much, but it's honest work - and maybe that's what he needs. Also, he doesn't live in their old house obvi.

Diego always wanted to be a cop. Ik, Ik, ACAB, but it still would make sense for his character that despite his erratic behaviour, having kids and a wife and realising he needed to take care of them would calm him down a bit, leading him to a police job. It wouldn't be glamorous, and he could still want more. It would also showcase how he isn't as precise as he was without his powers, but still given him something that felt more meaningful.

Allison being a less successful actress feels correct. But having Ray walk out felt like such a disappointment. Perhaps instead either he died or she left him, showcasing that the Raymond in this timeline wasn't the same, and nothing was as it should. It would also make sense if she was really estranged from her siblings out of guilt. They try to pull that one, but they don't actually show it completely. Maybe she thinks they're madder at her then they actually are? Who knows. More self-reflection at the time-line she helped create.

Klaus being scared of everything was kind of interesting, considering he was once immortal. He didn't know it most of the time, but he also did drugs because of his powers. I like him starting this season off being clean, and also him just being extra careful. I don't think he would've gotten a job, he'd definitely mooch off of someone else, but perhaps not Allison. What if it was Luther instead? It feels like something he would do. Or Diego who forces him to babysit. They've never liked his bullshit, but I feel like Luther would've taken pity on him.

Five retires. Idk how, but he'd find a way. It would be a lot funnier seeing him just chilling out at an old persons home then have him be an agent. He's already done that shit, he's finished with all that.

Ben being a crypto-bro is so funny tho, idk, that can stay the same. And Luther picks him up from prison, and he's like "btw , Klaus lives with me" and we get some Ben and Klaus shenanigans.

Victor moving to Canada also feels correct.

I don't even know what I want Laila to do. I kind of enjoyed her being a stay at home mum, trying to do better than her own upbringing, but also showcasing how it's slowly killing her. Or perhaps she it content with it. Because just like five, she's spent her entire life running and flashing through time, maybe she enjoys settling down.

All this leads me to this - I don't like Ben spiking their drinks and forcing their powers back. I think it would be better if a real threat presented itself and they chose to get them back. Maybe Ben found the marigold and tried to talk Luther and Klaus into taking it. They tell him no, then someone, maybe Klaus, dies, and just like in the beginning, it's the thing that brings them all back together.

I love Klaus, and it would suck without him, but maybe seeing someone who has constantly escaped death so many times actually face mortality would bring a certain perspective. There's a threat (idk what that would be, something something, wrong timeline), and they're just not strong enough to defeat it without their powers. They don't want them back, they're content with their lives as they are, but they have to get them back now to save the world one last time.

Idk, that's just some thoughts. I think seeing them content and have shit ruffle up their lives one last time would've been an interesting way to return to. Alternatively, them being unhappy in the beginning, getting their powers back and then losing them again, because they recognise that they're happier without them. Just, any semblance of a character arc through the season and some introspective you know?

[lordmushroomkat]

Truly funny thing I thought of.

So okay imagine just like, a nothing-goes-wrong AU for MDZS. Maybe Lotus Pier still falls idk. But like, relatively untraumatized Yunmeng Siblings. Jiang Yanli isn't currently married or engaged to Jin Zixuan. Jiang Cheng is in charge of Lotus Pier but is much more relaxed and has support from his siblings. Wei Wuxian isn't extremely depressed and surrounded by darkness.

And there's Wei Wuxian thinking "My shijie deserves the best person in the entire world!" and then "Wait, you know who's the best person in the entire world? Lan Zhan! He's so good and perfect and pretty and handsome, he'd definitely make shijie happy! And I'd have an excuse to see him more often!"

And thus he begins his mission of getting his shijie and his Lan Zhan together. He invites him to Lotus Pier and tries to get them to spend time together but mostly shijie ends up third wheeling for her little brother's dates with the boy he obviously likes. He does tell her his idea at some point and she tries to talk him down from it a little, noticing how much he himself clearly likes this boy. Lan Wangji and Jiang Yanli get along well enough, but they are both fairly quiet people, so mostly they both end up affectionately watching Wei Wuxian being himself.

Eventually, after misunderstandings and shenanigans, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji do get together, and Jiang Yanli is delighted that her little brother finally got the boy he'd been chasing.

Presumably Jiang Cheng is watching this whole thing from the sidelines, completely baffled. Wei Wuxian tried to explain the whole plan to him but he hadn't understood why his goofy brother thought the Second Jade of Lan was so great. Also he was convinced that Lan Wangji would never agree to come to Lotus Pier. He was very confused when the guy actually showed up, and even seemed happy enough to be there. He decided to stay out of it.

[nikatyler]

Zeph 1.0

can't believe that yesterday i was like eh i'm not sure about that armor, it looks so good on them

(x)

oooh a pretty evil lady!

(x)

same girl, same, about everything that has ever happened to me

(x)

it's been 84 years (more like 16 hours) but i'm finally opening bg3 again ✨

i think i'll do some more goblin camp shenanigans today if possible 👀

ohhh right. essentially i've already murdered like half the goblin camp so now the other half of the camp is trying to murder me, huh?

Me: "ah yes I'm far enough" *the explosion hits Zeph and Zeph dies* *reloads* "ah yes now I'm definitely far enough" *the explosion hits Zeph again and Zeph dies again*

"yeah we've got this" *the entire party dies*

Fucking gnolls man

yeah it's been a long bloody day

HELLO SAY THAT AGAIN

hUH

jesus christ this man is h🫣rny

Okay so I'll go watch a baking show with my mum in a bit and then we're going back and doing da thing 😏

Sorry for not giving updates if you were looking forward to them, anyway a little thing I love is how everyone sleeps on their back. I do that and apparently that's weird to everyone around me? 😂🤨

I will literally be in my bed like 🧍‍♂️

(x)

newest development in my bg3-rotten brain

did i mention this game is doing things to me because it is doing things to me

(x)

Anywayyyy you know what time it is 😌

I may have just spent an hour organizing everyone's inventories and figuring out who gets what armor and all but we're good to go now I think

Explosive shrooms, yay 🤩

(x)

I'm 💀💀💀 I need to go to bed lmao

Okay so basically what happened um. I don't know how but it did. So I wanted to help Astarion. But I clicked the wrong thing. And I pushed him off the boat. And he died.

I RELOADED BUT HOW DID I EVEN DO THAT 😭😭

If there's one thing about me it's that I'll accidentally murder my favourite vampires

(x)

I love Zeph so much they're so prettyyyyyy

Kinda wanna make a modern day version of them in ts4 and have them interact with my other characters. They'd fit right in

(x)

hole hehe. hole

(x)

my bi ass is having a bit of a dilemma rn

(x)

gay gay gay they're in love your honor

HELL YEAH KISS

(x)

Raw footage of me during my latest combat

I was actually so stressed dude 😭 thankfully we made it through but ahhhhh

Does anyone else apologize to the characters when they get hurt? Like sorry lil guy in my computer I'm sorry I'm putting you through this I promise you'll make it out I PROMISE ah fuck you're getting hit again oh no sorry sorry ahhhh

So uh. The adamantine forge fight huh. 🙂

(x)

Granted it doesn't count ts4 correctly rn probably because I haven't updated yet but…yeah 😅😅

(also I have way more hours on ts4 actually, this is just since Jan 2023, I played through Origin/EA app before and then switched to Steam for reasons)

(x)

my fucking thoughts exactly, i hate this battle 😭😭 on a real note i relate to him so much when he's whining DUDE WE LIVE

i should've known he wouldn't take that as a good thing lmaoooooo dude creases when you smile is the biggest compliment smh

FREN!!!

(x)

oops

(x)

I'm sorry what

(x)

pwettyyyyy

(x)

I'm sensing that I may have messed up real bad in Last Light Inn yesterday...ooops

I should've reloaded to see if things could turn out differently but I've done a lot afterwards, idk if I wanna go back now 😂 No spoilers pls, that's something for me to figure out in my next playthrough

"ooops" people DIED 💀 people i had previously saved died 💀

(x)

You're never gonna believe who I murdered again

(x)

I'm fucking crying I need you to resurrect him you moron stop shaming Zeph for having a sex life Update we are so back lads

(x)

Funny how fast I went from "I think Zeph is mostly good, they just want to get rid of the parasite and help people along the way" to "actually fuck it darling you're so right some power would be nice"

(x)

Crying laughing sending this to my sibling who's in art school. On point

(x)

"eh we'll be fine i don't need bonuses" *rolls 1*

(x)

daddy Ketheric omg💀💀

(x)

uh anyway

(x)

this is the best they are the best 🥹

(x)

Don't be upset, I will reload, just don't be upset with me pleaseeee 😭

The "please a videogame vampire at all costs" disease is real I'm afraid

(x)

Uh oh it's almost 3am, tomorrow will be an eepy day, well it's worth it

(x)

I'm so close to having a funny number of hours played 🤭

(x)

Killed the workout, now let's kill this guy that I struggled with for half an hour. Almost killed my whole party in the process so I quit and decided to kill my legs instead 😂

(x)

[m1ckeyb3rry]

LMAOO per your post abt tiktok I had no idea that was a thing but I’ve never seen any acc that would be you come up as a suggested account (I rarely get them anyways but when I do it’s usually like some acquaintance of sorts) so from my end youre safe o7

PLEASSEEEE “is it home wrecking if the homes already wrecked” GOODBYE

Niko having to put up with aikus shenanigans is so funny he’s taking one for the team

REAL miraverse reo>>> peregrine getting revamped into “reo is friendless” LOL

UAHAHAHA NO DW YOURE GOOD!! I have not once seen an acc that resembles anything close to what I would imagine to be you (??) no Miras or any accounts with names similar to Mira either I just see the original tiktok and whoever posted it like usual YOURE SAFE but AWEESJHS IM HONORED LMAO but there’s definitely nothing immediate that shows indicating you sent it or anything so I think you should be all good!! Even after looking through all the links you’ve shown in our convo too I’ve never had anything pop up and I doom scroll there soooo Also lowk I can’t remember how many you’ve linked outside of our convo but tbh idk how many people are reading through like the 100k words worth of convo we have so for the TikTok’s you’ve shown me you’re also probably fine

LMAOO I think I need to go recalibrate my fyp and get some yona on there omg

OAEU TIME LETS GOOOO but FR im sure inspo will strike for the req soon! Maybe you’ll get ideas while you’re writing oaeu LOL

LMAOOOO FRR THEYRE SO FUNNY I think its esp funny to think abt bc bllk is canonically live-streamed so imagine in their free time egos like “ok so bc that money grabbing tanuki needs more money yall gotta be streamers and gamers now get on YouTube”

NO FRRR I LAUGHED SO HARD I was trying to figure out wtf that was in zantetsus aura the fucking bullet train has me crying Nagi looking gorgeous and I always appreciate those villainous Karasu panels!!

- Karasu anon

OKAY YAYYY it’s only happened a couple of times for me with people on tumblr like once an anon sent a vid to me and i got the “___ shared a video with you” so i guess they might have seen me?? and just earlier i sent a video to one of my mutuals in an ask and i got a notification saying “___ viewed the video you sent” so they also might have seen my acct which ugh but at least it’s only two people 😰

LMAOO karasu is just helping natural processes along he’s not actually doing anything problematic 😩 the relationship already sucked it’s not like he’s being a bad person (not that aiku cares he’s just excited to pass along his wisdom because nobody but niko even listens to him and niko has 0 interest in getting girls so he’s alone on that front until karasu comes up to him) okay i think the aiku and niko dynamic in the oaeu might kind of be like miraverse tabiori?? like goofy siblings/slight father son vibes…i think it’s what makes the most sense for them HAHAH

half of the high school era in peregrine is just reo being like pleaseee be my friend pleaseeee like in the next chapter which i haven’t finished yet it’s revealed that reo is straight up trying to buy reader’s friendship LMAOAOA he does eventually win her over obviously but it’s not via monetary means 😭 but fr ironically (considering how she doesn’t want to be close to reo because her parents want her to marry him) reo is like the longest consistent relationship reader has in her entire life FJSKDJSH they’re like lowkey also soulmates…the funniest thing is if reader’s parents hadn’t pushed her to marry him to the point that she despised the idea they actually might’ve gotten together 😓 self sabotage on the l/n parents’ part at its finest

HELP OKAY GOOD my irl name is not actually mira but it’s uncommon enough that i wanted to come up w a pseudonym for online in case anyone i know irl found this acct…it’s pretty similar to mira so if it had come up you def would’ve been like “oh yeah this is her” JDFJSJ so that’s good 🙂‍↕️ and OFCCC i’ve become insta friends w a couple of my mutuals from tumblr once i’ve known them for a while 🤩 my rule is if we’ve been talking for enough that i feel like we would be friends irl you can get the irl socials HAHA…also very true…i think outside of our convos i posted that snuffy edit once?? and then the aforementioned tt that i sent to my mutual but otherwise yeah i don’t link too many if it’s not just between us

HAHA if you ever need shinah edits let me know i probably have every single one saved i will happily send my favs (i also have some of the other characters but shinah def has the most because…well it’s SHINAH)

i’ve been like lying on my couch all day doing nothing so no writing done unfortunately but trust i will be back at it and something should be out reasonably soon!! whether it’s a req or oaeu i cannot say but something for sure 🤩

LMAOO the bllkers (except reo because he’s rich 🤑) have to pick up side gigs in order to fund the project…barou starts a cleaning service…yuki and chigiri get into modeling…nagi becomes a streamer but people only follow because he’s hot so he has to do insane fan service in every stream…hiori starts a reaction video youtube channel and gets rin to guest star and they go mega viral because rin consistently says out of pocket bs plus they’re both pretty (rin accidentally gets sae cancelled for a week by saying smth crazy before revealing he’s related to sae)…otoya convinces karasu to become a scammer/find sugar mommies with him…it would be insane LMAOAOAO

I WAS SO CONFUSED AT FIRST AND THEN I WAS LIKE OMFG IT’S A TRAIN!! ig it fits w his backstory where he learned he was fast because he always missed the train???? LMAOAO honestly he’s such an unreal character i love him 😭 and yesss epinagi nagi is always STUNNING but they rlly put the focus on karasu and kiyora this time around like kiyora looked ADORABLE this chapter and karasu looks like a genuine villain but in a fine way 🤩 i can’t help but admit that idgaf abt himizu though like i kinda find him weird (the whole tongue thing is just. uh??? interesting??) and i’m worried abt what he’s foreshadowing w chigiri 😰

[rggie]

Idk if we do oc talk here, but i needed to tell someone about my favorite boy. I made a whole twst oc who is a third shroud w/middle child syndrome named Connie bc of certain connections to greek and latin words in the other boy’s names. Cringe is dead you can make ur ocs related to canon now/j. He bullies Idia (lovingly) about using gamer speak and internet abbreviations out loud. He and Ortho are menaces bc of their 🥺 act. He’s still very much a Shroud and an ignihyde student he never wears his uniform coat it’s the Emotional Support Jacket at all times.

Connie isn’t quite as eccentric as his brothers are considered, but he’s got his quirks. A little paranoid, never seems to sleep, has cameras and bugs and droids everywhere he can hide them. Seems quiet and hard to approach, but is a warm person until someone hits his berserk button. He hears someone say a single negative word about Idia or Ortho and he’s already swinging. Connie has no mercy for anyone who would even think hurtful things about the people he cares about. He’s their shield, he’ll stand at Idia’s side in the future, he needs to make sure nothing bad happens again. Never again.

He’s still a kid though. He likes to have fun, and his idea of fun can vary drastically depending on who he’s with and if there’s someone acting as impulse control. He and Ortho aren’t allowed to wander campus without a chaperone. They’re watched diligently to ensure it doesn’t happen. It happens anyways, and then explosions happen. Connie and Idia have a healthy sibling rivalry, always trying to one up each other. Fighting over academics, video game scores, height, you name it. Often verbal, sometimes physical, never magical. They have their sibling fights the old fashioned way, by wrestling, yanking hair, kicking, and biting until someone (Ortho) tells them to stop.

Connie is still Idia’s little brother, no matter how much he annoys him. He helps with homework he struggles with and they play games together when they’re not at each other’s throats. When Connie and Ortho get in trouble, which is often, they can always run and hide behind Idia’s back. What do you mean Idia’s precious little brothers caused that mess?? They’re totally innocent, how dare you accuse them of something like that! He could see Connie doing it, but Ortho? NEVER! It’s probably those other freshmen! Jeez!

They’re just funny little guys. I needed someone else to know about them before I exploded. Thank u for the ramble spot- 🐝

we absolutely DO talk ocs here. ocs, theories, brainrot abt ur fave characters, literally anything. if there’s one thing i am, it’s a good listener. (it comes with my introverted nature😭 i think.) scream at me abt ur blorbos and i will scream back!!! /pos

another shroud sibling. my heart is so full. FIRST OF ALL CONNIE SOUNDS LIKE A MENACE TO IDIA (lovingly) AND I ADORE HIM ALREADY. the sibling rivalry… i love it. pushing each others buttons😭 realistic sibling dynamics🤍🤍🤍!!! and oh my god imagine connie and idia getting into a physical fight in front of the other third years.. absolutely shocked because who is this firecracker able to wring such emotions out of idia????!! and ortho is more than happy to brag abt both his brothers 😞😞

and aaaaa ortho and connie getting into little shenanigans.. the way they have to be supervised PLEASE THEYRE SO SILLY… AND THEN HIDING BEHIND IDIA’S BACK WHEN THEY GET INTO TROUBLE😭😭 i can’t fight the smile growing on my face “He could see Connie doing that, but Ortho? NEVER!” i’m ascending. this is absolutely gold. idia’s innocent little siblings could never do anything wrong!!!🥺🥺🥺 it must have been ace or grim. it must have!

thank u for this bc u have no idea how much i love familial tropes. like romantic things? they’re cool! but familial tropes and platonic intimacy are at the top for me 😭 just imagining all the shroud sibling interactions has me tearful. and this isn’t even touching on the angst potential…

[imbellarosa]

Hiii! I was wondering if you read fanfic?? And if so, what are your fav tropes/works??

Hi!!!! I read A LOT of fic from A LOT of fandoms! My fav tropes are either flat comedy or enemies to friends to lovers or friends to lovers or something like that! I only read happy endings, but I don’t mind some angst in the middle. Idk what fandom you’re looking for so I’m gonna give you a list of some of my all time favs from EVERY fandom, and I’ll add one that I’ve written!

Walk That Mile by purpledaisy- 150k words 1D enemies to friends to lovers road trip AU across the US for a fun, banter-y time with some real communication issues that really get resolved well. People always say that a rom com should have a good answer for “why can’t they be together NOW?” And this one does it really well! No real angst, and a lot of fun. 

Have Love, Will Travel by @kingsofeverything - 97k words 1D YouTubers on a roadtrip AU! If you liked the first one on this list, you’re gonna love this one too! Sweet and long and full of the memories you would make on a road trip. Lots of laughs with this one, and I wish I could see the “Have Road, Will Travel” video series irl! 

Tell Me Now, Tell Me Now by @vanillabeanniall - 55k words 1D Miraculous Ladybug AU but you don’t need to watch the show to ADORE it - I know that I sure do!! Funny and sweet and SUPER ironic, with superheroes and Paris mixed in and great characters! Who wouldn’t love it?

So Let’s Cross the Lines We’ve Lost by thecoloursneverfade - 165k words 1D friends to enemies to friends to lovers uni AU that was one of the first that I read in the fandom and really made me fall in love! Good friends, some angst, hard convos that lead to real growth, and lots of really great characters. This feels real, for a lack of a better word, and is always compelling. 

Ain’t That A Kick in the Head by keysmashlesbian, wreckingtomlinson (karasunonolibero) - 23k words 1D comedy AU ft. football player!Louis, Disaster gay!Harry, memes, frogs, head dives, Blue Coolattas (whatever those are), and a very sassy Red Robin waitress named Fiona. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve read it, and I always laugh, and I always find something new to fall in love with. 

Leave it To the Breeze by @hattalove - 82k words 1D GBBO AU. This one feels like a warm hug. It’s gentle, fun, has great characters, believable angst, has you rooting for more than one of the characters to win, and is also hilarious, somehow. I’ve read this fic over and over and over, and I especially do it when I have time before a new season of GBBO. Also, have snacks!! It makes me hungry

The Section by bananaheathen - 11k words 1D Uni AU with grad student TAs, sophomore undergrads, art classes, movie analysis, and final essays as methods of seduction. Also, nicknames, nude models, a Halloween party, and absolutely shameless flirting. I loved it, and laughed the whole way through. 

I’ve Heard it Both Ways by @adoredontour - 26k words 1D Psych AU. I love this one. I love the fic, I love psych, I love the author. I’ve read most of her works, but this one has such a special place in my heart. Go read it!! 

Play it All Night Long by janine_tangerine - 43k words SPN radio AU with DJ!Dean and bartender!Cas, with music, annoying coworkers, sassy siblings, and lots of love. WHOAH WHATS THIS A LIVEJOURNAL FIC??? I know but I read this ages ago, and it has music EMBEDDED WITHIN THE FIC! It was my first introduction to Bob Dylan, who remains one of my favorite artists of all time. 

Crossroads State by Mercy - 51k words SPN slice of life AU with Mechanic!Dean, Teacher!Cas, Law Student!Sam, and lovely lovely moments. All sweet, some tension, but no real angst. I read this forever ago, and still come back and back and back to it. 

Peace and Good Luck to All Men by KismetJeska - 31k words SPN College Au. DO YOU MEAN THE BEST CHRISTMAS FIC EVER OF ALL TIME??? I read this on the first day of December every year, and it makes me laugh every time. Cas falls in love with his sister’s boyfriend, Gabe and Luke are in a seduction competition, Michael is tired of everyone, and Dean doesn’t know what hit him. 

For All You Young Hockey Players, Pay Attention by @thursdaysfallenangel - 144k words SPN enemies to lovers hockey AU. Just. Please go read this. Gorgeous and still one of the best fics in the whole fandom, imo. Cas is the new transfer on Dean’s team, and Dean doesn’t like change. 

The Complete Works of Emmanuel Allen by @violue - 54k words SPN small town AU ft. writer!Cas and local business owner!Dean. Dean meets his favorite author, but does not know it’s him. Shenanigans ensue, with a lovely warm feel. Dean builds a mausoleum and owns cats and lives in the woods. Cas needs a change of scene. Sam thinks everyone needs some more company. 

The Mirror by cloudyjenn - 25k words SPN parallel universe AU. This was one of the first fics I ever read, and I still love it. Dean touches an enchanted mirror and travels through universes in search of an answer to a question he hasn’t asked. Full of love, family, and companionship. 

Asunder by rageprufrock - 24k words SPN AU with Social worker!Dean, Doctor!Cas, Sober!Sam, and RUBY!!! Ugh I love this fic for Ruby alone. This one is more bittersweet. Dean hasn’t spoken to Sam in years due to his struggles with addiction. Sam, now sober, is getting married, and has invited him. Dean can’t face his family alone. 

But It’s a Good Refrain by lady_ragnell - 23k words Merlin Radio AU! Merlin has an anonymous gossip radio show, and someone calls in to put Arthur on blast! Morgana is a fan, Arthur is not amused, and a sort of enemies to lovers thing occurs. Just lovely, and it makes me laugh every time. 

And Like the Cycle of the Year, We Begin Again by @katherynefromphilly - 208k words Merlin canon compliant. This is the Season 6 we should have had. If you’re at all into this fandom, go read it - it’s still an all time fav for me. Hundreds of years later, Arthur walks out of the lake. Merlin has been waiting. 

Give The Dragon a Chili by @supercalvin - 47k words Merlin magical AU based on the story in New Zealand of the cat stealing someone’s underwear. Merlin’s dragon is sort of a thief. 

Fundamental Imperfection by Starlingthefool - 12k words Merlin famous author AU. Arthur likes Dickens. Merlin does not. They get into it on a panel, and twitter stan wars ensue. And enemies to friends to lovers where literary arguments are an expression of love, and stories are magical. 

The Student Prince by FayJay - 145k words Merlin Uni AU. What a classic!! It’s a magical realism royal enemies to friends to lovers AU ft. a dragon in the walls, a lovely gay soc, Gwen as a Muggle, and some really great characters and moments. Do yourself a favor and go read this one. 

Call it Love by @dalek-in-heels - 30k words Merlin RPF. UGH THIS ONE!!! Okay 1.) the author is one of my best friends, and she’s amazing! 2.) lovely fic that takes place at the end of Merlin, and still has one of my all-time favorite misunderstandings in fic ever. “Yogurty Heart” is my favorite way to say I love you. 

If Nobody Speaks of Remarkable Things by @watsonshoneybee - 35k words Sherlock AU canon compliant through season 3. This one is sad, but the title is taken off of one of my favorite books, and the writing is gorgeous - as is the characterization. Happy ending, though! I promise! So the journey is all worth it! 

In All of the Lives We Are by @dalek-in-heels - 20k words The Magicians canon compliant through the first half of season 3. Sarah does it again and writes one of the best fics I’ve ever read. Art as therapy, a sweet love story in more than one universe, and finding the will to keep going through the worst days. The writers of the actual show should have read this fic and put it on the screen. This is my canon. 

A Happy Ending? Sure Enough by me (imbellarosa) - 8k words The Magicians canon compliant up to season 4. This is the only one of mine I’m putting on the list, because I still really like this one! You need some context, but not much? Idk, just if you want to see how *I* write! 

[tev-the-random]

What it Ursa took her children with her? - Pt.2

As we were saying:

Little over year has passed since the family arrived in Hira’a, and fateful news gets to them: Ozai remarried. His new wife is someone who is honoured to marry the Firelord and doesn’t mind the fact that his head is so deep up his own arse- anyway, and they are expecting a child, who is to be the Firelord’s legitimate heir.

Azula’s hopes and dreams are shattered. At age ten, she is quite literally being replaced in her beloved father’s life. It’s like she’s never even existed, and she can’t help but wonder what she did wrong.

Zuko is also upset, of course. All those years when Ozai told him he was unfit and worthless come flooding back. But somehow, he already expected things to turn out like this. Unlike Azula, he wasn’t so deeply feeding on hopes that things would go back to normal. He sees it more as a situation that was out of everyone’s control.

He convinces Azula it’s not her fault, and these kids will still be trying to understand and defend their father later down the road. There must be a reason for all of this, right? They start thinking of a reasonable scenario…

Ursa just feels sorry for the poor woman who has to deal with Ozai now.

So we get a timeskip: about three years came and went. Zuko and Azula – treated as kids and not as weapons – lead a peaceful and happy life whenever they’re not thinking of their father and everything they could be doing out there.

They have become known local troublemakers in their spare time. Kids know better than to challenge them, people know not to leave flammable goods out in the open – a strict policy regarding fireworks has been established after a chaotic incident – and failure to keep an eye on them this one time led to… well, let’s just say that the town is still unsure of whether or not they’re is being haunted by evil spirits.

They aren’t allowed anywhere near Forgetful Valley, but bold of you to assume they never tried. In-jokes arise.

‘No, I’m serious: that tree’s face looked exactly like yours, Zuzu. You really should befriend it,’ Azula mocks, remembering a particularly ugly tree they encountered in their adventure.

‘Sorry, I wasn’t looking at it. I was busy looking for whoever it was that asked you,’ Zuko retorts. ‘Since Forgetful Valley has all the kinds of crazy stuff.’

‘Maybe we should go back and look for your impulse control, then.’

‘None of you are going back in there,’ Ursa reprehends. ‘It was very irresponsible of you. Forgetful Valley is a dangerous place, you could have gotten hurt!’

‘Your mother is right, you know?’ Noren comments. ‘I’ve been to that jungle before, and it’s definitely not a playground. But I swear…’ He makes a dramatic pause. ‘I once saw Ursa’s sense of humour in there.’

The kids burst out laughing while Ursa sighs. ‘Since you can find such amazing things in the valley, dear, why don’t you go back there and find yourself actual funny jokes? I’m sure my sense of humour will be around the same corner.’

*More laughter*

(IDK, I write crappy comedy, ok?)

They still have a bit of a hard time making friends. I wouldn’t say they are shy, but they definitely have a talent to say the wrong things at the wrong times, and it’s hard to make deep connections. Sure, they would play with other kids from time to time, but in the end, Zuko and Azula are each other’s best friend.

They’ve cleared an area by the beach that any Hira’a resident knows to stay away from when they’re training.

Azula discovered a great passion for theatre. Not only are her acting skills fantastic, she also seems to be naturally aware of what makes a good scene. People say she’s Noren’s Little Assistant.

She hates being called Noren’s Little Assistant. She would much rather be called Ursa’s Little Star, because goddamn is she a good actress and she needs everyone to know that.

Zuko is more of a plant-lover guy. Unfortunately, he hasn’t inherited his grandmother’s green thumb, and despite Ursa’s best efforts to teach him, it seems like everything he touches dies.

He has grown to show a way with animals, however. Any variety of frogs and toads love him; lizards of all kinds are attracted to him like he’s a magnet; furry animals big and small adore him and any type of bird-like creature seems to think he is the best human being in existence. But his favourite animals are still the turtleducks.

Back in the palace, Iroh eventually learns of Ozai’s bullshit and how he got the throne in the first place. And you know what? The time has come for Iroh to draw a line in the sand. He confronts his little brother, who confronts him back by telling him that, should he try to tell anyone in the Fire Nation the truth – that Ozai was a top-grade traitor who actually had no right to the throne –, no one would believe him. Since his brother won’t be sensible, Iroh decides that’s it: he’s fucking out.

Now a fugitive from the Fire Nation, he somehow winds up owning a lovely traveling tea shop called the Jasmin Dragon. Most people don’t even suspect he is the fearful Dragon of the West, because he’s just so nice?

You can bet he serves blends of tea from all across the nations.

The tea shop is also a good cover up for his exchanges with the Order of the White Lotus. He gives and receives information, and does his best to help villages to either defend themselves or evacuate during Fire Nation attacks.

One day a member of the White Lotus travels to Hira’a for one reason or another and finds Zuko and Azula. This person then sends a letter to Iroh.

Iroh comes to Hira’a to visit the family. He’s glad to see they’re ok, even if he can’t stay for too long. But long enough for some Quality Time – these kids have grown so much!

Iroh doesn’t know of Ursa’s part in Azulon’s assassination, and only assumes she knew of Ozai’s plan. But now, it’s time that her children learned a couple of things, and he is willing to teach them, so that when the time arrives for them to meet their destiny, they should be able to choose wisely and face whatever comes their way. So he asks the children to accompany him in his travels.

Ursa doesn’t want to let them go. They’re children, they should be here living a peaceful life, not meeting some grand, dangerous destiny! What if something horrible happened to them?

Iroh understands the pain of losing a child. He doesn’t want to make Ursa spend her time worrying about losing two, so he respects her decision and soon leaves the town.

But the siblings are not about to just sit here when they know they’re destined for something greater. What incredible knowledge did their uncle hold? Did their father have something to do with this? They always knew there was more to their fate than just living in Hira’a for the rest of their lives, and this is their chance; it’s now or never.

Zuko and Azula are about to sneak out and follow Iroh when Noren spots them. But instead of trying to stop them – he is well aware that he can’t – he gives them two masks and some advice about never forgetting who they were.

Why yes, I am saying that they eventually take the masks and become partners in crime, Zuko as the Blue Spirit and Azula as the Red Spirit, because parallels.

They catch up with their uncle and adventures and shenanigans issue as Zuko, Azula and Iroh cross the Earth Kingdom.

Now imagine this trio: two of the most awkward firebending teenagers travelling with their old tea-loving uncle, who spits proverbs like he’s made of them. The possibilities for both hilarious and heart-warming moments are endless.

Iroh thinks himself a matchmaker. Whenever he thinks he sees some romance going on, he encourages his nephew or niece to make a move. His flaming cupid arrows do more damage than good, yet he only has good intentions at heart. Teens all around the kingdom encourage you to stop, sir.

Their new life is even more humbling than in Hira’a, since they are constantly travelling. But they manage, and they know their uncle is nothing but wise… even if Azula is still quite arrogant and manipulative, and Zuko is impatient and hot-headed, which can lead to a lot of conflict.

Iroh teaches them both how to create and redirect lightning. Zuko is better at redirecting than Azula. Creating it, on the other hand, is a bit more complicated, and both of them get their fair share of explosions while learning. Neither of them really gets a hang of it – although Azula is better at it than Zuko, that’s not saying much – for they still have a lot of identity-related turmoil inside them that won’t let them grasp the energy.

Guess who else teaches them? Other members of the White Lotus. Both Zuko and Azula get some swordsmanship Skills™ from Piandao, some different (and somewhat unwillingly taught) firebending technics from Jeong-Jeong and a lot of things from Bumi, including but not limited to: creative thinking, the art of patience, strategic planning, dealing with pirates and a surprising amount of rocks-related knowledge.

Bumi adopted Zuko and Azula and gave himself the role of Second Uncle. You cannot convince me otherwise.

So one day, little over a year after the siblings joined Iroh, they wind up in a city where this big circus is performing. Uncle Iroh decides to take his niece and nephew to see it. And oh, aren’t they surprised by who they see performing?

Even though Ty Lee was essentially the only one between her sisters to befriend Azula – and consequentially, the only one to periodically spend time in the palace with her –, Zuko and Iroh still have a hard time distinguishing her from the six other girls who look exactly like her, uncertainly calling her all different names before Azula snaps ‘you idiots, that’s Ty Lee!’.

The acrobat is so glad to see her friend again, because damn: it’s been nearly four years since they last saw or even heard from each other! And Zuko, I thought you were dead? This is such a neat reunion, there’s so much for them to talk about! And sure, the circus has to leave soon and so do the siblings, but Ty Lee reassures them that, if they ever needed her, she wasn’t hard to find. This isn’t the last we’ll see of Ty Lee.

Azula doesn’t let it show, but she resents Ty Lee a little bit for choosing to abandon her noble life. She really wishes she could have had a choice.

Uncle Iroh tells the siblings stories about the war that would have some day mesmerized them. But now, his opinions about those events and what he did as a prince general have changed; that, along with what the family sees in their journey – all the horrors brought to innocent people – gives Zuko and Azula a new perspective on what they used to think was a greater good. It will still take a while for Azula to understand that no, these people are no lesser than her and for Zuko to understand why any of that matters.

Iroh eventually tells them the truth about Azulon’s death. Or at least, what he knows of it: their father killed Azulon, banished them, took the throne by force and planned to gain more power at the expense of everyone. This is a lot to take in, and the siblings don’t quite believe it.

After four years thinking about it, Zuko and Azula decided to take their mother’s early words – they went to Hira’a to be safe – and formulate what for them was a reasonable scenario. They believe that Ozai never actually wanted any of this to happen. The whole family had to have been in danger, be it due to some political, social or personal threat, and Ozai wanted to take it all by himself to protect them. So he sent his wife and children away, concocted a plan with Azulon to cover for them and, once Azulon died and left him the throne, remarried to keep appearances. To Zuko and Azula, this makes perfect sense. And they thoroughly convince themselves of that.

They initiate an argument, thinking that Iroh is jealous of Ozai.

Their uncle sees these children are starting to stray from their path, but he knows this is a necessary journey for them. They will never be able to deal with reality unless they face it.

The siblings leave Iroh, planning to head straight to the Fire Nation capital and find out what really happened. Maybe now that they are older, it would be a perfect time to come back home; they surely could defend themselves from any threats.

Of course, they’ll be very disappointed to know that Ozai was just a bitch and never actually cared for any of them.

I don’t have a full formed idea about how their reencounter with their father would go down, but I say Ozai would officially banish both his children from the Fire Nation for trying to cause a commotion – which could easily be perceived as a threat. Not only that, but Zuko and Azula are the children of a traitor; cue for Ozai revealing what happened that night four years ago, confirming that he was the one to kill Azulon with Ursa’s help.

I also think that, after that day, the Firelord would have discreetly helped spread rumours about Ursa that would drag her name through the mud in the Capital – was she cheating on Ozai? Was she selling Fire Nation information to the Earth Kingdom? Was she planning a coup against the Firelord? Her crimes change from mouth to mouth. In the end, no one would take Zuko or Azula back unless Ozai wanted it. But he doesn’t. Not now, at least…

But Ozai also decides to play with his options: he plants a seed of doubt in his children’s minds; should they prove themselves useful later on, it would only take pulling a few strings for them to come crawling back to him. So he tells them that they needed to prove themselves for everyone to see that they weren’t traitors like their mother. They needed to prove their worth so that he could accept them.

Ozai goes a step further with Azula and tells her that, before his demise, Firelord Azulon had a plan. A plan to bring her back and put her in the leading, prestigious role she was always meant to get. But they needed to wait for the right time. There is a right time, Princess Azula. Your hopes were right all along, they will come for you eventually if you prove yourself.

The siblings have a lot to think about while they’re leaving the Fire Nation. They idolized Ozai so much all these years. But the undeniable truth came crashing down on their heads, spoken by the man himself. What would they do now? They didn’t think it possible, but their harsh actions made things so much worse: they couldn’t come back to their mother, they didn’t have many hopes of running into Iroh again, they can’t even set foot in their homeland anymore; Zuko and Azula are all on their own.

Maybe it’s time to turn a new leaf. It starts with them being fairly neutral, not completely loyal to either the Fire Nation or to the rest of the world. During this period, they would argue a lot about what to do or where to go next, getting separated and going their own ways before destiny makes them stick together again, over and over.

They manage to get a few deals and own a few favours here and there, become known thieves as the Spirits, and maybe meet up with Ty Lee’s circus every now and again. Life is hard.

But there is one thing that is about to be a beacon in their darkness…

Time to catch up to the show. Oh, you thought I wouldn’t go there?

Part 3 coming right up!

(I know I said this would be a two-parter, but it got ridiculously long, so I split it again. Three-parter now.)

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-12-25

I’m not going to spend time BLOGGING an upd8 on Christmas morning!

...yes I am who the fuck am I kidding.  (Bonus stuff and Hiveswap are still well on hold though.)

So are we gonna follow up on the main ship?  Probably not, right, with that perfect Karkat point to cut away, right?  We’re just going to leave Roxy’s question hanging, as well as makeouts etiquette, and leave while having seen a COUPLE FRAMES of non-possessed canon Jade with only whatever fun fanart was inspired across the internet by the moment to tide us over????

Yeah, probably.

Ugh, more Dirk.  I guess it’s overdue.  :(

> CHAPTER 16. Welcome to my Secret Lair

Oh huh, I guess not?  So... Jane’s, or Rose and Kanaya’s?

Karkat stays for longer than John thought he would. They talk a bit, but mostly they are quiet. Eventually, Karkat gets called away on yet more important war business, leaving John with one final touch on the shoulder. John leans into it in response, though he’s a bit ashamed of chasing down a sliver of physical affection so soon after obliterating Karkat’s evening like he had.

Pretty much, yeah.  Can’t blame either of them.

When Karkat is finally gone, John still doesn’t move. It isn’t as though he has nowhere else to go, since there are quite a few places he might attempt to make himself useful, for better or for worse.

You’re still abandoning the task that was explicitly yours to protect your literal kid and his friends, but, oh well.  Low-point.  Dave dead, house dead, broke news, I get it.

He just doesn’t feel ready for that yet. The remnants of his house are still smoldering, and he can’t stop staring at them. It would make sense, he thinks, to want to root around through the rubble for anything that’s still intact; some half-charred keepsake to claim as the last thing left that’s still his. But he doesn’t want to do it, and he doesn’t want to think about it. And he still can’t move.

Can’t move.  No Breath huh?  What’s going to get him to, then?

> (==>)

Oh boy, that might help.  XD  She’s pretty good at that.

> (==>)

Still with the waistline gap.  And was his phone always yellow like his God-Tier shoes?

ROXY: hey john can u do me a quick solid ROXY: actly idk how quick itll be but its definitely solid ROXY: harry anderson says i just missed u being here but could u skip back on over?

Nice, huh!  No judgment, just a hey-any-chance-you-could-swing-back.  He sort of needs to be needed right now, in a simple, almost everyday non-judgmental way I guess.  (That’s what he NEEDED anyway-- whether he deserved it though is up for debate.)

ROXY: i need help w/smth and yr darling boy is holed up in his room working on some fuckin craft project or other and cant be bothered

YES SEW JOHN A BETTER FITTING FUCKING OUTFIT

ROXY: and now that me and u are freshly on speakin terms again i might as well take advantage of that olive branch and put u to work ROXY: assumin you havent died in an air raid, that is ROXY: which id also be interested in knowin about so if u wld be so kind as to reply instead of leavin me hangin

Heheheh.  Gosh Roxy is always the best.

JOHN: yea yea sorry im here. JOHN: i just had a hard time getting my phone out of these fucking tiny pants.

Hah.

JOHN: and also my house is bombed out so i'm kinda grappling with that. JOHN: but i honestly am not sure how much longer i need to sit around staring at it. trying to align my memories of my youth with whatever is happening right now so JOHN: short version is no i’m not dead, and yeah i can come back over there and help you out. ROXY: oh sweet yr alive and down to do manual labor its a win/win JOHN: see you soon.

Yep!  Pulled away from all the metaphorical, ultra-meaningful bullshit, back to some brass tacks with some easy humor.  Definitely something Roxy can do well.~

> (==>)

EXCUSE ME.  What is that outfit and pose.  Did you--

ROXY: sup ROXY: follow me ROXY: well were just going to my room so i guess technically u know the way JOHN: haha ok.

Did you invite him over for the manual labor of banging you while your son is sewing in the other room

Or maybe the labor is making him a new sibling.  JFC

Is this plan part of why we got the sudden content warning that was mocked or was that mainly for Hiveswap 

John follows, trying to shake the ominous feeling he got from what she’d just said. He’d been in and out of this house a lot in the past few days. Why should this be any different?

I DUNNO JOHN DOES THIS SEEM DIFFERENT TO YOU

> (==>)

Yea this seems like a fucc room.

JOHN: it’s not like i could forget! ROXY: ya i guess u only really saw the living room when you were here the other day but i have changed some stuff up ROXY: done a lil redecoratin here n there

So it’s MORE of a fucc room than previously >__>”

ROXY: may have to do a smidge more if my old bff decides im next on the list for bombing out ROXY: but so far so good

Ah geez.

ROXY: just a coupla exploded cars in the yard from some shenanigans our dear son and his friends were in but u kno it is what it is!!!

Well, that’ll buff out easy.

ROXY: can i get u anything? ROXY: just made some coffee JOHN: no, uh, i’m good.

Of course she has a fancy handled winecoffeeglass  (and the handle does look ridiculous but it’d be too hot to hold otherwise)

Roxy shrugs and swirls her own coffee around in her novelty mug. John looks around. A lot about the room is the same. The family photos, the rug. There’s a lot more cat stuff in there now, though. The bed is new. John feels like he’s about to take a test he hasn’t studied for. He makes himself focus on what she’s saying.

That would be the feeling.

> (==>)

MY GOD.  Roxy is so fucking good at this holy shit

She KNOWS she’s making him squirm and she loves it

JOHN: so uh anyway. JOHN: what was this favor? ROXY: yo why dont u just come rest yr tush for a bit ROXY: take a lil relax next 2 me here JOHN: haha uh. JOHN: roxy i uh. JOHN: im flattered, but i don’t know if that’s really the right step right now. JOHN: don’t get me wrong, everything seems so fucked up right now that when i try to think about what might actually BE the right step, it feels like a huge cartoon question mark might physically manifest over my head. JOHN: but I’m not sure if um rekindling our physical relationship is really the best--

So is Roxy trolling him, about to reveal she wasn’t thinking of sex and was just making things seem sultry?  Or just had “lol jk” as an option-select, maybe.

> (==>)

ROXY: r u kiddin me rn egbert JOHN: i’m not? unless you were, in which case yeah lets say i was also kidding. JOHN: oh my god, i’m sorry, i don’t know why this making me freak out.

OH NOOO NOT THE DISDAAAAIN - CRITICAL HIT D:

ROXY: i remember our past boot knockin with fondness but that is a situation im not interested in revisiting

boot knockin XD

ROXY: look john ROXY: i was trying to be polite about it ROXY: offering u sustenance n rest n all ROXY: but you look like shit ROXY: i just wanted to catch up on the whole heinous war situation were in and maybe check in on e/o before leaping strait to the real n actual nonsexual manual labor favor i have in mind for u JOHN: oh.

Hey, she can’t help looking sexy she’s too good at it.

Is the manual labor moving the crashed cars?  Can’t Roxy pull that off on her own, or... banish the cars to the void or something?  (Oh, but WOULD she want to do it on her own when she can rope in John and bring him down to earth by giving him a useful task?  And admittedly his strength and wallet would make things easier.)

John feels his shoulders unbunch. Of course. Yeah. He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced?

Probably some gender stuff mixed up in there too, June.

He doesn’t know, but he believes Roxy that he must look pretty haggard. He probably feels haggard? Maybe sitting down will feel better.

Just put your feet up yeah

> (==>)

WHAT A CUTE IMAGE

JOHN: sorry. like i said, my "how to react to stuff" meter is completely fucked right now. ROXY: thats fair bud

she’s used to being patient with you don’t worry otherwise you never would’ve gotten this far

ROXY: real fast i do need to do a quick takeback of all that shit i said last time we talked about janey not being literally the most evil person we knew or whatever ROXY: i guess i was hopped up on arguin or somethin since that was before we hit our conversational vibe bc of course u were right and i shoulda listened

Ouch.  Yeah, we saw just lately just how far off the deep end she was.  (Where was that funny upd8 reaction art summarizing the bit where Kanaya was holding Tavros hostage and Jane was transparently debating “hmm do I let my son die?” and Kanaya and Tavros were just looking at each-other flat-mouthed nervous?  I REALLY wanted to share that but I don’t usually want to reblog or put most stuff HS^2 not under a read-more, for spoiler purposes, usually.)

ROXY: im just glad ur ok ROXY: or like alive JOHN: yeah, jury's still out on "ok" but, you know. ROXY: ya ROXY: u said ur house is gone?? JOHN: yep. JOHN: completely. ROXY: jeez ROXY: i would ask how ur feelin but like the answer 2 that has got 2b "prtty bad"

Talk it ouuuut~~  get those feels out there and articulated john

JOHN: yeah. JOHN: i mean. JOHN: no? JOHN: it’s weird. JOHN: it feels like it should be a bigger deal, I guess? JOHN: like it’s my HOUSE. JOHN: but mostly it always felt like my dad’s house? JOHN: and when i started living there after i moved out of here, it was like i crammed myself back into whatever was left of my kid self? JOHN: and it didn’t feel good, but it at least was familiar, you know? JOHN: like living there let me feel closer to my dad, trying to be like the way i remember him, or like how i remember him wanting me to be, or something? JOHN: and i didn’t realize how much i hated doing that until i saw it all go up in flames. JOHN: so i guess i could have used my powers to stop the fire and save whatever was left of the place, but i couldn’t bring myself to do it. JOHN: like some fucked up part of me was glad i got there too late? JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison. JOHN: and even now i keep trying to explain it away, as though it’s because of how fucked up everything else is that it made me feel good. JOHN: but that’s just bullshit. JOHN: it DID feel good. JOHN: i DO feel free. JOHN: sorry.

I was kind of saying some Breath/Blood stuff at the time of him losing his last tie to his stubborn sticking-to-his-kid-self bit?  Except now we’re mixing it in with June Egbert and his gender-identity questions too.

ROXY: no need 2 apologize ROXY: we just delved in2 my whole gender thing last time so it seems fine for u to have a turn JOHN: i didn’t say it was a gender thing.

Oh shit

ROXY: well no i just meant like i did some sharing ROXY: like referrin 2 the topic i brought up when we chatted last ROXY: but like now that u mention it ROXY: *meaningful pause* JOHN: … JOHN: i JOHN: ROXY: lol well we can move on 2 the favor part if youd rather ROXY: stick a lil pin in that topic n come back 2 it when u have had sleep

Are you just INCREDIBLY incisive Roxy or have you and John talked about this before?

ROXY: like i said the other day its not like this shits figureoutable in 1 sitting anyways JOHN: yeah... ROXY: sooooooo ROXY: movin on

It’s just fine for Roxy to slow-roll this yeah, if she’s going to pry open that door a little

ROXY: dont be mad but theres a part of the house u didnt know abt the whole time u lived here JOHN: what? ROXY: yea ROXY: i got a secret lair ROXY: for my sciences

OH FUCK YES SCIENCE LAB, of COURSE Roxy would want a cool science lab basement because she always wants a cool science lab basement

ROXY: and i get to it via a transportalizer underneath our bed ROXY: which is 2 heavy 2 move by my lonesome so i just needed to borrow some o your aforementioned powers of wind

Okay no.  Wait.  What the fuck?

First of all, as funny and MSPaintAdventures-y as furniture being in the way of things is, why would you block it with a bed too heavy to move, but,

Second of all, more importantly, how is a GOD-TIER ROXY not strong enough to lift a heavy bed?!?!?!?  Either she’s lying to get John involved in things or this is a gendered cop-out because these characters are superheroes at the TOP of their echeladders, given obnoxiously powerful video-game strength and athletics only to then have ascended into DEITIES.  God-Tier Roxy could probably have lifted a bed like that when she was SEVENTEEN!  And now she’s an ADULT, out-of-shape or otherwise!  If this were a whole CAR I might be willing to handwave it, but just a heavy BED?!?  And none of the GUYS are going to have this much trouble lifting a bed like this, are they??  This just feels like following classic cartoony gender tropes in the complete absence of these characters’ super powers, what the fuck, and also Roxy if you didn’t make it Transportalizer-only access you could have given it an entrance you could phase through with your fancy powers to get to.  FUCK.

This feels stupid.

ROXY: so if u dont mind woosh away JOHN: uh ok, well... JOHN: a secret science lair, sure, i can deal with that. JOHN: why not! JOHN: it doesn’t work out great when i do the windy thing indoors, though. ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit

Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.

You’re already THIS sensitive about gendertalk?

ROXY: ok or just like push when i push ROXY: we both got sick muscles ROXY: no other adjectives necessary JOHN: yeah ok. ROXY: on 3?

Please, please reinforce the idea that they both have sick strength, because they fucking do and the idea that Roxy actually a hundred percent NEEDED John to do this is BS.

> (==>)

JOHN: holy shit? ROXY: sorry to lop yet another huge scoop onto ur lil brains ice cream revelation sundae JOHN: so wait, if this thing's always been under the bed, how’d you get down here before without me? ROXY: well thats neither here nor there john JOHN: i mean it is kinda. Here. ROXY: fine ok checkmate ROXY: i dont ACTUALLY need ur nerdgrit for this escapade ROXY: like im sorry but i said it ROXY: i mostly just wanted to see you and show u wats down here

THANK FUCKING CHRIST.

If that wasn’t actually just a lie to get him involved I was going to stay SO mad.  Of COURSE Roxy can move a fucking BED no matter how heavy it is.  OF COURSE.

ROXY: and also uve been ~sent for~ JOHN: ok but like ROXY: john i am inviting u 2 my inner sanctum ROXY: i am literally bringing out the word "sanctum" in case u werent already clued in 2 how cool this is ROXY: so do u wanna go into my secret lair or wat JOHN: yeah!? JOHN: yes? i guess? ROXY: aight good

Yes John of course you want to stop fighting it

ROXY: then as they told me in the hospital before lil h a was born ROXY: just push

eyeroll, but yeah, of course

> (==>)

Oh cool, sprite form version of her loungewear.

> (==>)

Sorry for my compulsion to post every full-frame image of Roxy in this awesome outfi-WERE YOU KEEPING CALLIOPE UNDER YOUR BED THIS WHOLE TIME?!?????

That’s like... almost a fucking metaphor isn’t it????  For the relationship you preferred in the other timeline and possibly THIS one TOO or

ROXY: hey callieee i got him ROXY: o damn john sorry i shoulda also told u callies here weve been hangin out again ROXY: 1 more freak for ur bean

Oh huh, so this isn’t an always thing.  And these two can get close in more than one timeline where it would’ve worked out nicely.  :)

JOHN: oh it's ok, my bean feels pretty well adjusted to freakage at this point so keep them coming if you like! ROXY: k cool i will JOHN: do i get to know what that big thing under the sheet is? ROXY: hmmmmmm no JOHN: oh ok. JOHN: are you sure? i mean, it seems like a pretty prominent feature of the room. JOHN: space. JOHN: wherever we are. ROXY: and a totally mysterious n COMPLETELY inconspicuous feature it will have to remain for now ROXY: we r kinda in a hurry here fyi ROXY: and by that i mean ROXY: we are in precisely the amount of hurry that means im excused from having to a that specific q rn JOHN: right, sorry. JOHN: i will pay no attention to the object behind the curtain. ROXY: u catch on fast egbert ROXY: anyway theres more cool info coming so just follow me

I don’t have any big theories.  Is it just the Hiveswap device or something?  If Calliope helped with it it’d help explain the Cherubic theme.

> (==>)

JOHN: so... this is all downstairs? JOHN: it seems like you had a lot of work done. ROXY: well no not x actly ROXY: were in the old meteor JOHN: under the house??? ROXY: ok so ROXY: in hindsight it may have been a bit misleading 2 say like ROXY: "downstairs" ROXY: in reference to a place which is hells of buried underground and may not actually be literally under the house ROXY: but there is no time to explain all that rn john so instead im going to refer u to my adorable little green friend here CALLIOPE: #U_U# ROXY: (hehe) CALLIOPE: *AHEM* CALLIOPE: hi john! CALLIOPE: long time no see. ^u^

Cherubs just really like dark cavelike places full of weird tech don’t they.

> (==>)

THEY’RE SO CUTE

JOHN: oh, uh. hey callie! JOHN: it sure has been a while huh. JOHN: now that i think about it, the last time the three of us hung out like this... CALLIOPE: was when i was aggressively third wheeling yoUr prenUptial coUrtship? CALLIOPE: if yoU dont mind, john, i'd rather not rehash that period of oUr lives. CALLIOPE: it was more than a little painfUl for me. JOHN: oh. JOHN: god, jeez, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to-- CALLIOPE: hee hee john i am only pUlling yoUr leg, don't worry. CALLIOPE: if anything i was personally a little thrilled with how things shook oUt in that respect. CALLIOPE: imagine, if yoU will, a yoUng cherUb raised in solitUde, whose only solace was the convolUted and tUmUltUoUs romantic schemata she projected onto her only friends from another Universe. CALLIOPE: and then fUrther imagine that this yoUng cherUb, throUgh varioUs even *more* convolUted contrivances, ended Up in the company of those selfsafe friends as an eqUal participant in their sphere of social discoUrse! CALLIOPE: it is a joy the like of which yoU possibly cannot fathom. u_u

Reinforcing that things turning out this way was in fact the FANTASY that Calliope was writing over in the Canon timeline.  Just, heavily, HEAVILY implied that the Candy timeline is -- or at least originated as -- Calliope’s fanfiction as a Muse of Space, and its competition for audience interest with canon is the essential conflict between alt!Calliope and Dirk (or Dirk and Andrew Hussie).

CALLIOPE: so to pUt it simply, getting to experience sUch emotional drama myself was an impossibly enriching experience. CALLIOPE: possibly a first for my species! CALLIOPE: it's actUally qUite interesting, if yoU ROXY: *nudge* CALLIOPE: oh, right. yes. i'm getting a little carried away, haha. CALLIOPE: argh, i'm sorry, this is not how i planned to begin this vital conversation.

Vital conversation?  What sorta truth-bombs are coming?

CALLIOPE: but to sUmmarise, what i was trying to say is: CALLIOPE: don't beat yourself Up aboUt it john. CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr. CALLIOPE: so i consider Us aboUt even at this point. JOHN: hahaha!!! JOHN: okay, well that's good to know! CALLIOPE: ^u^

Holy SHIT that was savage!  And we’ll NEVER know whether or not she really intended it so savagely, either.~

JOHN: so um... JOHN: i hear that there's this big secret thing you wanna tell me about? CALLIOPE: oh right, yes of course! CALLIOPE: let me jUst say first of all how thrilled i am that yoU're on board. CALLIOPE: i wasn't sUre if yoUr natUral inclinations woUld have preclUded yoUr coming to such a place as this, and yet here yoU are. CALLIOPE: this whole endeavoUr will be *so* mUch easier with yoUr help.

Uh oh.

Hopefully babies aren’t involved.

JOHN: oh! well, shucks. JOHN: not really sure what that means but i'm just glad to be of use somewhere, haha. JOHN: which, speaking of somewhere, CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are. CALLIOPE: how much do yoU know aboUt black holes? JOHN: um... like, the big space things? CALLIOPE: they aren't always big actUally, and in fact their relative smallness is practically their defining qUality. JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: bUt okay i think we are on the same page. CALLIOPE: so, what if i told yoU that we are inside of a black hole right now.

Oh dear, we’re getting into the canon/noncanon divide?

JOHN: um... JOHN: like, HERE? JOHN: we just transportalized into a black hole? CALLIOPE: no, i mean, what if oUr whole WORLD was inside a black hole. JOHN: ok.

Yeah, that’s gonna be John’s reaction.  “ok.”  Pretty much inevitable.

CALLIOPE: earth c, or at least oUr version of it, has, from the moment we crossed the victory threshold, been inside a black hole. JOHN: ok. CALLIOPE: and not just any black hole, bUt the very black hole in which the green sUn Ultimately met its demise, allowing oUr victory in the first instance! JOHN: huh! ROXY: ("huh!") ROXY: (rofl my fucking ao egbert) JOHN: (shhhh!)

And Roxy enjoys his non-reaction reactions as much as we do, hehe.

CALLIOPE: bUt, paradoxically, the critical moment which determined its capture within the black hole happened *after* that point. CALLIOPE: i refer of coUrse to yoUr decision not to retUrn to the mediUm and fight my brother. JOHN: wait, wait. JOHN: you mean, the meat and candy thing? JOHN: oh my god. JOHN: you mean i actually DID make a mistake that day. CALLIOPE: well, that's not exactly what that-- JOHN: ugh, i fucking KNEW it! JOHN: i'm so sorry. JOHN: i'm so sorry that i put the earth inside a black hole everyone. ): ROXY: john ROXY: listen ROXY: u have got to get out of this mindset i am begging you JOHN: ):

Yeah shake him out of this shit.

ROXY: your choice literally didnt matter ROXY: the whole thing was symbolic in the first place ROXY: literally symbolic in the case of the picnic i mean come on ROXY: it was just some steak and a plate of candy suckers JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: i mean, i wouldn't go so far as to say that the meal we shared was unimportant, given the sacred significance of the two options i presented. CALLIOPE: but yes, yoUr choice of snack was infinitely less important than the choice which it presaged. CALLIOPE: and even then, calling it a choice woUld be sorely misleading. CALLIOPE: think of it like a coin flip. CALLIOPE: the series of events that led to Us being trapped beyond the event horizon of an Ubermassive black hole could be considered "tails", while the events which would have occUrred otherwise could be considered "heads". CALLIOPE: since both were possible, and paradox space is the way it is, they actUally both happened. and we jUst "happened" (hee hee) to get tails instead of heads. JOHN: you mean we ended up with the bad possibility. CALLIOPE: not at all! since both possibilities depend on one another's existence, it really doesn't make sense to call them "right" or "wrong". they both just "are". JOHN: o...kay... CALLIOPE: u_u

Yeah, it’s going to take a bit more than that to convince him he didn’t make the “wrong decision”.

CALLIOPE: i realise that this may be a lot to process. CALLIOPE: it's easy to forget that this wasn't obvioUs to everyone from the beginning. CALLIOPE: anyway, the reason i went on this tangent in the first place was to explain that the space we are standing in right now has a special significance, in that it is the location which corresponds to the black hole's singUlarity. JOHN: oh, wow. JOHN: um. JOHN: ok so, sorry if this is a dumb question to ask suddenly, but what does being inside of a black hole actually... mean for us? JOHN: is that bad? JOHN: is it like in movie, um, JOHN: shoot. JOHN: roxy what was that matthew mcconaughey movie from your earth that we watched? ROXY: u mean interstellar JOHN: RIGHT. JOHN: the one with the organ. JOHN: man. i cried at that movie so much. ROXY: lol u can say that again ROXY: iirc at least part of y u got so weepy was the fact that u couldnt believe a version of earth existed where ppl got 2 watch more mcconaughey films than you JOHN: listen. JOHN: i simply don't think you all appreciated the gift you were given. CALLIOPE: i don't believe i'm familiar with this particular film ^u^;; ROXY: oh dont worry cal you didnt miss much JOHN: (gasp)

This is all gold

ROXY: but the important point is that no its not really an interstellar type situation here egbert ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love JOHN: aw.

Dammit, now we have to be on the lookout for that possibility.  Or it did sort of already happen more than once to John.  ...Whatever.

CALLIOPE: to go back to your original question, john. CALLIOPE: it's not strictly speaking "bad" for Us to be inside of a black hole, mUch thoUgh that contradicts most of what anyone knows about them. CALLIOPE: of coUrse, if we had fallen into it, that woUld be a whole other kettle of fish. CALLIOPE: the tidal forces woUld have stretched Us all into spaghetti and then ripped us apart! CALLIOPE: bUt the natUre of oUr arrival was more akin to simply "being" here, sUddenly. one moment we were not, and the next moment we were, and somehow always had been. CALLIOPE: in everyday, practical terms, being inside of a black hole has very little bearing on Us. CALLIOPE: i mean, the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here, bUt for the most part it doesn't seem to be anything too oUt of the ordinary. CALLIOPE: bUt beyond that, it means that we are sealed away from the rest of existence. CALLIOPE: oUr sphere of inflUence is limited to the sphere of the black hole's bounding horizon. CALLIOPE: as far as everyone else is concerned, we might as well not even exist! JOHN: is there no way we could let anyone know that we're in here...? CALLIOPE: almost certainly not!

No?  So this doesn’t have to do with the divide?

CALLIOPE: there are very few ways for anything to escape the kind of predicament that we are in right now. one of them is to be an all-powerfUl being with control over the very fabric of space, with the energy of two Universes at yoUr disposal. CALLIOPE: in which case, escape woUld become rather trivial, if a little Unscientific. JOHN: ok. i am going to assume that we can't just do that. CALLIOPE: yoU've hit the nail on the head, UnfortUnately. U_U CALLIOPE: the method i described was the one employed by my alternate self, who yoU may recall crashed through the event horizon in the body that once belonged to jade harley. CALLIOPE: she departed through a pUnctUre she created in the black hole's surface shortly after consUming my brother, a deed which provided her with the necessary "oomph", and which was frankly rather breathtaking to watch. =u= CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.

What the heck?  Calliope SAW all this?  Is this her Muse powers at work, letting her observe these things, or was she there?  And John certainly did NOT see ANY of what Calliope just said happen.

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

So we’re going to find that out if we haven’t already.  Maybe something to do with the way Vrissy just conks out narcoleptically?

JOHN: ...right. JOHN: so... let me just get this straight. JOHN: knowing that we're inside of a black hole... does that actually change anything? JOHN: like, can't we just go on living like normal? CALLIOPE: oh absolUtely not. CALLIOPE: i don't know if yoU've noticed john bUt this world is on the brink of a total cataclysm. JOHN: oh.

Um, what?

CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval. CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality. CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u JOHN: that's... certainly one way to put it, yeah...

No plot-armor for your entire timeline, I guess, yep.  Outside of canon, we can imagine and write about ANYTHING happening to the characters, or just drop their existence entirely, much like a doomed offshoot timeline.  It’s a plot stability that depended heavily on the threat of Lord English and being trapped in a story, and without it things are bound to see a BIT chaotic (or “degrading” if you view it as subjected to the whims of fanfic writers, certainly).

CALLIOPE: at first, i believed that this was simply necessary. Us playing tails to oUr coUnterparts' heads, the black to their white, and so forth. CALLIOPE: bUt over the years i have come to the conclUsion that this is simply not kosher. ROXY: its total bs is what it is CALLIOPE: right, yes. CALLIOPE: a steaming pile of bUllshite. CALLIOPE: and so we have decided that something needs to be done aboUt it.

Ah fuck.  You’re going to regulate non-canon?  “Canonize” it?  Is the fact that you eventually succeed at whatever it is you’re trying to do part of why we have the story presented to us in this bifurcated structure?

ROXY: this is finally where u come in jegbert ROXY: we gots quests for yous CALLIOPE: hee hee, yes. CALLIOPE: or *a* quest, to be specific. JOHN: oh boy! ROXY: (this fkin nerd i s2g)

Roxy and Calliope setting him on this quest as a Rogue of Void and a Muse of Space feels fitting.

JOHN: i'm not sure how i can go about freeing us from a hellish space prison, but i'm up for giving it a try i guess? JOHN: i have... literally nothing better to be doing at this point. except for maybe hanging out with harry anderson. ROXY: nice save lol

YEAH WE’RE STILL GLOSSING OVER HOW YOU LEFT HIM UNPROTECTED, JERK

ROXY: but u dont need to worry abt busting us outta space jail tbh ROXY: thats not ur problem to fix JOHN: oh. JOHN: i'm... not sure i follow, then. ROXY: i mean yeah ur gonna obvs facilitate it in a sense ROXY: but only by going and busting the person who can actually help us outta normal earth jail CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity. ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan. CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more. CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it. CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak. CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself? CALLIOPE: ... CALLIOPE: phew. okay, i'm finished. CALLIOPE: CALLIOPE: sorry, that took longer than i expected to go throUgh.

..............................

OOooooh, kay.

Whatever this is, it’s going to be really weird and PROBABLY infuriating and/or shippy, and I’m probably not going to like it.  Plus it seems like it’s some sort of inverse belated canonization of some other black-hole-rescue theories I went on about at some point.  Although, related to that link, “aspect of freedom” if anyone wasn’t paying attention!  That’s a (sorta-)canon mention of the purpose of it!

They’re going to attention-wh-- attention-hog themselves out of the black hole so that they’re “considered canon” too, or close enough.  Huh.

ROXY: what r u talking about cals that was great ROXY: i could listen 2 u plotsplain for years CALLIOPE: oh you >u< ROXY: fyi this was why i wanted u to get a move on eggbread ROXY: so callie could have more time 2 infodump ROXY: thats love bitchhhhhh JOHN: hahaha. JOHN: ok, well, i think i understood all that?

Love with who? Callie, John, both?

In reality, John isn’t sure what most of this means. But on balance, it feels okay? He’s gone back and forth about a hundred times in the last week about where his place in everything is, so he might as well ride this out. Plus, the last time a Lalonde kind of told him to do something, he thinks that he chose not to, and look where that got him. And it’s not like he has other plans. He may as well do this! It’s at least going to get him involved in things again, if nothing else. He turns to go, and then hears a sound. It’s the sound of feet and knocking on doors, echoed through stone and digital static.

Oh shit.  Is Andrew trapped behind some fourth walls behind the curtains.

> (==>)

Oh RIGHT also that DEVICE is where they want to bring Vriska.  Are they going to overturn part of canon itself with a super-retcon thus making this timeline unbelievably relevant or--?  Maybe make all the PESTERQUESTS canon or something?!  I don’t know.  Maybe they’re INTENTIONALLY starting the game like Vriska wanted to??????

Guh, this is something so big that I don’t WANT to theorize about it, do I.

JOHN: did you hear that? ROXY: wha ROXY: oh yeah uh ROXY: i may have messaged rose and kan and jade to check on them too ROXY: so its prob onea them showin up ROXY: they don’t need to know bout all this tho ROXY: we got time to chat with them b4 u go get vriska

No, even if it’s a knock at the somehow-top-level-house-even-under-buried-- oh, right, maybe it’s covering in part a monitoring system that looks up there.  But still, part of that sound was DOUBTLESS these two hiding something, all standing in front of the curtain like that.

JOHN: i’ll go stall em. ROXY: thx babe ROXY: oh is it 2 soon for that joke or JOHN: no, weirdly enough, that one’s fine. ROXY: oh good ok see u up there soon!

How is calling your significant other “babe” not cool REGARDLESS of gender?!  Like wasn’t that always cool? --Oh wait is it because they’re not together or... but... guh, I don’t know.

Anyway, see y’all after the holidays at least.

[vynnyal]

Throwing random thoughts, headcanons, and a variety of pasta at the wall (but only those having to do with vessels and/or their biology this time): The Thrilling Third Installment™

...aka pretending i can be dark and dramatic jskhdfd

Thk's larger form is not the standard, but the exception. Thk was cited as being "raised and trained to prime form", which people take to mean pk assisted in the vessel's natural growth. However, that conclusion leaves a lot of unanswered questions, most important of which being “then what about Ghost?” In short, I think that train of thought is backwards. Vessels can't grow- they are ageless, and immortal. We know this due to Ghost, despite living as long if not longer than thk, being completely unchanged over the years. The only thing pk trained into "prime form" was thk’s mind and fighting prowess. Their body... well, I think it was mutated. Most likely either directly by pk, or ordered by him- and with the shenanigans happening over in the sanctum, I wouldn't be surprised if Soul was involved, too. In any case, it was in no means natural. Vessels are corpses reanimated by void; neither corpses nor void tend to make drastic changes on their own all that often. Whether pk predicted the vessel’s “issues” and intended to manually “upgrade” them from the beginning, it's hard to say. But... yeah. Unless Ghost goes out of their way to make themselves grow- if its even possible, now that pk is gone- its fairly safe to say, they never will.

...with that in mind, we are promptly gonna ignore that for the rest of this post lmaooo

Grown-up vessels wouldn't look like thk; while they are described as being raised into "prime form"... prime form, to whom? Rather than looking like an idealized pk soldier, it sounds much more fitting that they’d have an entirely different, natural adult form. Consider: their cloaks being longer and fuller, perhaps filling out into something with a more practical use to their “species”. Better yet, they could even grow up to be more beast-like. Feral vessels, YEhaW

The black egg temple is cited as being "built to sustain [vessels]", yet it can't be their lifespan that is sustained. Rather, it seems the egg is specifically designed to keep the radiance from tearing thk apart, physically and/or mentally. Ngl its p obvious, but worth noting.

Sorta-au where Ghost’s shade has 8 eyes, and/or is generally all-around more cryptid-looking.

@ the sharpshadow charm and the strange, 6-eyed creature their shade turns into: kudos to this post, they bring up something super interesting- the creature not only resembles the Shade Lord, but the lord outright becomes it during the Embrace the Void cutscene.

makes me respect the ol’ civilization a whole lot more if a single charm can turn a baby shade into a baby lord.

The concept of finding ghosts unconscious body, laying next to a corpse, while they battle in their dreams. Alt: when ghost enters the dream realm, their shade leaves their shell... And protects their body from harm.

If steel soul mode is taken as canon, just how did ghost and the shade meet? Alt: Ghost may never have “met” it at all, as it technically doesn’t exist in that mode- instead, its more of a metaphor than an actual entity.

What the vessels looked like- or were supposed to look like- before the void. Alt: a story following a child, alive and untouched, that somehow managed to be spared. They could even have a gender. Alt alt: the void intentionally spared them for some purpose, or even out of simple kindness- or at least, something that resembles kindness.

Re: the shade inexplicably having a nail: all the vessel's swords are crafted from “will-bearing rock”- of which i’ve come to lovingly call living stone- and as such, are of void themselves. That's how the shade seems to conjure up its own copy; it merely shapes it, from the ground, using void. And, while more of a stretch, Ghost’s nail being some sort of living stone/pale ore alloy could explain just how Ghost can do seemingly pretty crazy things with an otherwise ordinary nail. Better, while 100% a baseless hc, its material might actually enable Ghost to build it up and modify it to suite their size as they grow older. finally, a logical reason adult Ghost has an adult-sized nail-claymore. hdsfghjfghdsjf

On that same thought: Ghost outright invented the "art" of manipulating- or creating- living stone to make their nail. ...gimme a sec. The other escaped vessels have nails, too, right? Either meaning they also discovered this ability... or that theres some legitimate ground for the “vessel gang” hc. Or, yanno, i’m reading too much into Ari’s sprites but sHHhh

How did all the vessels know to race to the top? They seemed to be falling merely because they had just been born and had literal, actual baby strength; yet not only did they inexplicably risk everything competing to the top, they somehow knew death was waiting if they lost. Alt: pk just, bringing a fucking megaphone and telling them like a sports announcer.

What if Ghost made it, and instead of falling, they managed to joined thk at the lip? What would pk do? Push them off the edge??? Or just adopt them both?? Oh fuck au where they're raised as twin sacrifices. Or worse yet, they’re raised unequally, and one is trained only as an afterthought. As a backup.

Alternatively, pk keeps all the vessels au, only a few years later when they're grown. Pk now has a literal army of pure knights. Radiance is fucked.

Hm. If vessels were fully coherent entities from the moment of birth, why was there a crib in the white palace? Did... did they use it? I have a feeling team cherry made that asset before the abyss scene lmaooo alt: they did, uh, use the crib. Cue a very awkward scene of thk, clearly not a normal baby, staring at wl with like... idk, the poofy baby hat and pacifier. I can’t tell if the image is more funny or more sad rn shdfgfjsdgg

The og notes that inspired this post, in case my rambling makes more sense (and w/o the awful comic hjsfgjsdfhj): Oh oh OH i GET it now. The void is all about "will" and whatnot, right? And shades are "fragments of a lingering will"- will, like the one you leave after your death, but instead of inheritance its the vessels' desires...last regrets.... DAMN team cherry, that symbolism is clever as heck. That took me a while. Kinda funny how a will is, technically, a person's last regrets Like I knew they were last regrets but I didn't understand WHY. Duh, it's because they're literally Made Of Will. They are the vessel's "wills". I'm so stupid.

Ghost, walking thru the abyss, getting increasingly fed up / freaked out, ducking into a crack in the wall. They follow the crack into the Scream Chamber, pause, then exhale in relief that this was EXACTLY what they needed.

Ghost's shade rolling up its void-sleeves like “fuck it, ima defeat thk myself”

Why was thk's sword there? Was its pedestal decayed? Did it fall from their body? Was it place there as an afterthought, or hurriedly? alt: taking thk's sword before freeing them, but doing the mom thing like you're grounding them hdhfjchjch

I can’t believe it just occured to me now, but... as objectivley stupid as the vessel’s test was, Ghost... technically came in second place. What if that whole scene was a metaphor? Because really, it’s just too silly to take seriously. To do so isn’t too far fetched, either; many other elements in the game’s story are better taken as symbolic or metaphorical, anyways. Take the PoP cutscene- while it could’ve been a literal moment, where they just happened to find themselves standing around and took the moment to appreciate each other... imo it makes much more sense to read it as the concept of their faint ~forbidden love~ and parental pride itself. Or, better yet, the scene at the end of the 4th pantheon. Sorry, but I severely doubt that was an actual event. What I’m trying to get at is the significance of “second place” in the cutscene. My brain is too fried to chase down any other possible connections to this theme rn (if thats even what the theme is), but even without proof, the theory smooths out a few interesting tidbits related to just how Ghost could tough it out when all others failed. All except for #1, anyway. Either way I’m just happy to take this as an excuse to pretend that cutscene didn’t literally happen because like, l m a o

The story of a small group of vessels as they work together to escape hallownest. (aka the aforementioned vessel gang hc... im sure theres a more formal name but you get the idea). Its impossible to tell how long it took them to discover that near-invisible hole, the last exit remaining after the king ordered the abyss to be sealed up. Once they did, however, the remaining vessels were quick to make a desperate scramble to escape- only for the entrance to suddenly crumble shut, far, far too soon. The remaining 8 slowly made their way through deepnest, their numbers quickly dwindling as the jouney started to take its toll. The group was nearly wiped out by those terrible, spiney-legged creatures that used their own kinship against them. Only three finally escaped the deep, yet only two made it through the basin- the third, largest sibling, left to fight alone againt a hopeless battle, just to buy the others time. It was in greenpath, so close yet so far to their goal, that the second succumbed to the infection. It was a mercy killing, that nail through the heart. The last, after all of that, finally made their way to the very precipice of howling cliffs, hesitating for just a moment to gaze out upon the still-fresh ruins of hallownest. But only for a moment, before Ghost jumps down to begin their journey beyond this wretched place.

A vessel running from its shade as it tirelessly pursues them, the vessel refusing to put it to rest.

tw: suicide, + personal on main

Ugh ugh ugh ugh Either thk was fully conscious and in terrible pain for all those years... or they couldn’t feel anything at all. The former is horrible, but imagining thk waking up, chained, unable to do anything but wait for Ghost to heed their call? Did they turn their nail on themselves to help Ghost, end the pain, or some awful mix of both? For someone who has personally dealt with close friends and family that struggled with suicide themselves, hollowknight is one of the worst horror stories I've ever seen. And the fact that the story is so personal, so open to interpretation? The fact that each character is so genuine yet vague enough to be read completely differently to someone else’s biases? Its why hollow knight- the game, and the character- will forever be one of the most powerful stories to me.

in short, good LORD THIS GAME IS SO FUCKING SAD

[your-local-grubdog]

Koppaite Holidays: Linlina

Part of a series where I explore holidays the koppaits celebrate. 

Also available on Ao3.

Summary: Alph invites Brittany and Charlie to meet his siblings during Koppai’s midsummer celebration! Shenanigans happen. 

Parings: Alph/Charlie, Brittay/OC (except the OC exists in cannon but she's only mentioned in passing and has no name or even a personality so like. Idk man)

Other Notes: Siblings will be siblings

Charlie hummed a bit as he looked out the window. Alph was next to him, driving the car. The AC was turned up as high as it could go to help combat the heat. It was midsummer – down to the day – and it was typically the hottest day of the year on Koppai. While midsummer brought unbearable heat, it also brought with it a holiday – Linlina. It was the day that the shorter lived, summer fruits would be harvested. It was also the half-way point for the full harvest in the fall.  

Celebrations varied across Koppai’s regions, and even across individual families.  There was one consistency – the gathering of families. In the past, it was to help out with the harvest. And many do gather to help each other harvest, but most koppaits were no longer farmers. So they just gathered for the fun of it, to spend time together and catch up.

“Are we there yet?” Brittany asked from the back seat.  

“Just about.” Alph replied.  

They were silent for a moment. Then, “Do I really have to be in the back?”

“Yes.” Alph smiled a little, “It’s my car and I say that my boyfriend gets to ride in the front with me.”

“Does that make me the third wheel?”

“Yes.” Charlie finally spoke up. “Yes you are.”

Brittany made a face. “Well then.”

“It’s true.” Charlie simply shrugged.  

“AAAAND WE’RE HERE!” Alph pipped up, trying to talk over the other two.

They all filed out of the car, and Charlie took the chance to look around the neighborhood. It was a particularly dense part of the suburbs, filled with tall narrow houses that had small yards.  

“It’ll be nice to see your siblings again.” Brittany stretched a little. “Your sister was very nice.”

“She is a sweetheart.” Alph hummed a little. “She watched over my cat while we were on PNF-404.” He walked up to the door of the house they parked at, and gently knocked on it. It quickly swung open wide, and a middle-aged man who looked a little like Alph greeted the three.

“Alph! There you are, we were wondering if you would show up!” He smiled wide.  

“Well, we had to pick Brittany up from her aunt’s firs- oof.” The engineer staggered back a bit as two children ran out and hugged him.  

“Uncle Alph! Uncle Alph!” they both squealed in unison.  

“Hey you two.” Alph ruffled the boy’s hair. “You’ve been behaving?”

“I have!” the little girl squealed. “He hasn’t though.”  

“Hey!” The boy squealed. “Yes I have!”

“Alright, alright, that’s enough kids.” The man sighed and pulled them back a little. “Why not run out to the back yard and play with your cousins, okay?”

“Okayyyyyy.” The twins whined, then ran back inside.  

Alph laughed a little, and beckoned Charlie and Brittany to come closer. “He wasn’t able to make it to our liftoff or return, but this is my eldest brother, Upsilon!”

Upsilon smiled a bit. “It’s wonderful to meet you, Brittany and Charlie. Please, come inside.”

He stepped out of the way and they all entered the house. Charlie stared a bit as he looked around. He knew Alph had a big family but... he didn’t realize just how big. There were just so many people all crammed together in the house.  

“Well, how about I start introducing you guys to my other-”

“Ah! There’s your sister!” Brittany said, cutting him off. “I’m going to go talk to her. Bye!” and before he could do anything she sprinted off.  

“... oh... okay then.” Alph’s ears twitched. “Uh, did you still want to meet them, Charlie?”

“Of course!”

Alph smiled a little bit. He then grabbed Charlie’s hand and led him straight over to a corner where a pair of identical twins were. They didn’t seem to be that much older than Alph. “Hey! Eta! Zeta!”  

The two of them looked up. “Hey Alph.” One of them spoke. “Is that your boyfriend or somethin’?”  

Alph looked up at Charlie, who nodded in response. “Yeah, yeah he is! Brittany is here too but she ran off to talk to Theta.”  

“Ah, I sense that those two are close.” The other twin hummed.  

The first twin rolled his eyes. “Anyone with two brain cells could see that, Eta.”  

Charlie stared for a moment. “So wait, which one of you two is Zeta and which one is Eta?”  

The one raised his hand. “I’m Zeta.” he was wearing a black shirt with a skull pattern on it, and there was a chain attached to his jeans. He also had a lower lip peircing.  

“And I’m Eta.” The other one put a hand to his chest. His clothes were a dark purple and somewhat flowy.

“Okay... I think I can keep track of that...” Charlie crossed his arms as he spoke. 

“Don’t feel bad if you can’t. There’s like, fifteen-million of us.” Zeta waved his hand around.  

Alph then patted Charlie’s arm. “It’ll be fine. You’ll get it eventually.” Charlie looked down and smiled softly, then yelped as Alph dragged him off. “Time to meet more siblings now!”  

Alph hummed a bit as he looked around. Then he spotted a sibling and dragged Charlie over there, calling out “Hey! Iota!”

The sibling lifted his head up. “Hmm?” he was wearing a plain grey tank top, and was surrounded by three other koppaits in similar dress.  

“This is Charlie!” Alph squeaked a little. “Charlie, this is Iota and his partners.”  

Iota smirked a bit, waving his hand. “Hey man.”  

Charlie waved back.  

“Hmm, hey Alph? Mind if I talk to him for a bit? Just him.” Iota crossed his arms. 

Alph made a face. “Fiiiiine. But don’t keep him too long.” And with that, he walked off somewhere else.  

Charlie looked at Alph, then Iota. “What did you need?”

Iota simply laughed and patted Charlie’s back. “See these three?” he jesters at the other three koppaites with them. “They’re my band mates. They’re also my boyfriends and girlfriend. We’re all really close, you know?”

“... Yeah.”  

“We also love my siblings very much. They’re just as protective of them as I am. Speaking of,” he panned his arm out to the entire room. “All of us siblings care for each other very much.”

“... where are you going with this?” Charlie asked, eyeing him.  

Iota stared at Charlie with a dark and intense expression. “I’m saying that if you hurt Alph, it’ll be the last fucking thing you do.”

Charlie stood there, tense for a moment. Was this guy serious?

Evidently not, as he began to laugh a few seconds later. “Holy shit – the look on your face! I’m not actually goanna kill you dude. But seriously, don’t hurt Alph. I’m not above hurting you back for that.” And with that, Iota promptly began to ignore Charlie to focus his attention back on his partners.  

Charlie’s ear twitched and he backed away from the group. Looking around, it took him a moment to find and then get to Alph.  

“What did he need from you?” Alph asked, looking up.  

“I... I think he just threatened me.”  

Alph groaned and rubbed his head a little. “Oh, goddammit. Just ignore him, okay? He’s just being an asshole.”

Charlie nodded. “Are they all like that...?”  

“To a point. Yeah. Actually, maybe take whatever warning he gave you a little bit seriously. Back in middle school, my sister got suspended for me ‘cus some older kid was picking on me.”

“... Do I want to know what happened?”  

“Do you want to know what she did to that kid?”

“On second thought, no. No I do not.”

“That’s what I figured. A-Anyways, would you like to get a-”

“Hey! Alph!” Another sibling, this one tall and lanky, ran over. “Is this the boyfriend I’ve heard so much about?”  

Alph sighed. “Yeah, Tau. This is Charlie. Charlie, meet Tau.”

Charlie laughed a little. “Yet another older sibling, hmm?” Tau immediately burst out laughing, and Alph’s face went red with embarrassment. Charlie’s ears leaned back a bit. “What is it? What did I say wrong?”

Tau put an elbow on Alph’s shoulder, leaning on him a bit. “I’m his younger brother, not his older brother.” Alph looked away, trying to wiggle himself free. “That being said, I’m not the little brother!” and he began to laugh again.  

“Hahaha, you’re very funny. Asshole.” Alph grumbled.  

Tau just shrugged. “Anyways, it’ll be nice to get to be related not just to one, but all three of koppai’s hero's!”

Alph looked up, face even more red. He and Charlie were not dating that long, and marriage was nowhere in the picture yet. Then his expression changed from one of annoyance to one of confusion. “I’m just dating Charlie though.”  

Tau tilted his head. “Have you not been keeping an eye on Brittany?”

“No. Why? What’s she doing?”  

“She’s been flirting with Theta for as long as she’s been here, dude.”  

“She what?!” Alph than began to look around for the two.  

Charlie couldn’t help but smile a bit. So they’re all protective of each other. How cute. He then stumbled a bit as Alph grabbed his arm and began to drag him over to where the two women were. They were standing and talking to some of the other siblings, Theta’s arm securely around Brittany.  

“Theta.” Alph called out.

She looked over at him. “Yeah?”

“You are my sister.”

“That is correct.”

“And she is one of my closest friends.”

“Uh-huh.” Theta nodded as Brittany gave out a little “awwww”.  

“And neither of you felt the need to tell me you were a thing?”

The two women looked at each other before shrugging.  

“Nope.” Brittany replied.  

“Honestly we were as subtle as a freight train.” Theta spoke with a smirk. Then, as if to prove her point, she kissed Brittany’s cheek before going back to talking with her siblings. Alph looked up at Charlie, who could only shrug in response. He completely understood their whole “protective siblings” thing, but they also didn’t necessarily have to tell Alph either. It wasn’t like they went around announcing their relationship, not really until today.  

Charlie’s ear twitched and he looked up as Upsilon called for the group's attention. “Everyone listening?” he asked as the room quieted down. “Alright then. It’s just about sunset now, so that means it’s time for dinner! Everyone file into the kitchen and wifey and I will try our best to serve everyone a plate.”  

The entire gathered family then crowded into the kitchen, leaving very little wiggle space. Charlie elected to wait just outside the kitchen, as the thought of being over crowded like that freaked him out a little. Alph stood next to him to wait as well. As they waited, Charlie saw more siblings he didn’t meet yet, several little children bumbling around, and even some elder aunts and uncles he wasn’t even aware of. Eventually the stream of people in the kitchen died down, and the two were able to slip in as well. They grabbed a paper plate each, and soon Upsilon was there to slide some food on them.  

“There you go. There’s a little bit of everything as most of it’s gone now, but I hope you enjoy it none the less!” He said with a wide smile.  

“Thank you.” Charlie gave a short, awkward bow out of habit, and then left the kitchen with Alph and his food. There were no more spots to sit and eat, so they chose to stand as they ate and talked. A few siblings would approach them here and there, and would make small talk. But as dinner came to a close the family members started to leave the celebration and head home for the night. Eventually, Alph and Charlie had decided that they too were ready to head home.  

“Hey Brittany!” Alph called out, catching the botanist's attention. “Charlie and I are about to leave; you still need us to drop you back home?”

“Uh, no. I’m going home with Theta.”  

Alph’s ear twitched. “A-Alright. Just be nice to her.”

The two girls laughed a little. Alph said some good byes to his siblings, and then they left for home.  

[charismastaticarchive]

@valorwilled [ ( multi - muse established relationships meme ) ]   

😍 ROMANCE BLOOMS. *bold is my character, italics is yours.

annette/dimitri: i haven’t made a FULL canon divergence write-up, but based on all the things we’ve complained about, my dimitri is a little different than canon. but the way i’ve changed dimitri makes this relationship VERY SHIPPABLE. in essence the ship has three moving parts to it/phases. 

in the first phase (pre-timeskip), when dimitri and anette form their canon c/b support, dimitri is a very nervous young man. he hides it with his chivalrous, hardworking, princely persona, but underneath that, he is not one to make friends very easily or approach others. but he feels a familiarity with anette--the same she does with him, for having heard so many stories about her from her father. while he does express almost manic embarrassment about the stories gilbert told her about him, he actively wants to talk to her, he makes an effort to talk about his childhood with her, and he’s kind with her, even though he is rather nervous, and does have the funny habit of talking to himself.

in the second phase, (beginning of post-timeskip), dimitri is a changed man. he’s violent and rude. but annette has dealt with other violent and rude people in the past---and MY dimitri is still available to talk to, and will listen to others despite the rudeness he would treat them with, though he tends to seem to be conversing more with himself and the dead. i don’t think anette would put up with the rudeness. she’d be scared of him---but i think she would also treat him much as she treated felix, at least for one B Support-esque conversation, that would make dimitri honestly think about the mean way he treated her.

in the last phase, the “starting point” of my canon divergent timeline, rodrigue does not die, but dimitri is gravely wounded before fleche disappears mysteriously (due to those who slither’s influence). this last phase, dimitri is visited by his friends as he recovers and is unable to fight or seek the vengeance he requires. he will never stop having hallucinations or delusions (and he will in fact still be violent & coarse to begin with)---but he becomes mentally stable again over time & with the grace of his friends. anette, i imagine, is one of his biggest allies!!!

and i imagine, though this is very overly romantic, that they share a very Beauty & The Beast relationship lmfao. but WHERE IT GOES FROM HERE IS WHERE I WANT TO PLOT AND STUFFFFFF.

claude/dimitri: for this route, i would be interested in claude and dimitri being a rivalmance, to use dragon age terminology. while all three lords do not agree with each other---i think dimitri and claude are most ideologically different, as dimitri is something of a centrist in fodlan politics terms. i want to rp them having debates with each other in pre-timeskip, and then their relationship post-timeskip being about war shenanigans side-by-side, as they work to defeat the empire AND maintain a friendship despite claude wanting to change the world, and dimitri only wanting to fix duscur AFTER he gets his revenge. 

this isn’t as developed in my mind, but i picture a lot of political intrigue and terseness that gives way to ‘i only get so mad at you because i know you’re capable of better.’ ‘well, i only get so mad at you because you treat me like an idiot.’ etc. its rivalry-to-friends-to-lovers, but the emphasis is always on the rivalry and the friendship imo.

claude/edelgard: okay this is like my het otp for fire emblem right now lmfaooo except NOT HET AT ALL BC THEY’RE BOTH GNC BICONSSSSS I LOVE THEM... i want them to work together to make fodlan a better place! honestly, i would prefer this to fall the canon black eagles route where edelgard spares claude, but the ones who slither have not yet been bested. can you picture edelgard calling for help from the master tactician in secret---because i can, and I LOVE IT. this ship is built on RESPECT but also FLIRTATIONS. and yet i picture them as so repressed with each other, which i love. very victorian romance, no touching until they’ve actually started dating (and they never manage to quite say it out loud besides in jokes), and even then its just the touch of a hand to her back, a hand grazed against his cheek...

dorothea/edelgard: okay this ship is so good and underrated. so what i want here is basically just. dorothea never expected the empress would be her best friend. it feels too good to be true. she bends over backwards to impress her---but edelgard just wants dorothea exactly as she is.

paimonia/edelgard: POST-TIMESKIP, edelgard finds her love continues to ache in her chest. she sees her teacher again and falls in love all over again, and is suprised and mystified and in wonder & awe that they have not missed a beat. still, i think the most interesting thing of plotting this will be that edelgard HAS changed, it’s been five years in between them. while edelgard is still the fierce idealist revolutionary we all know and love, part of her is fearful, part of her is more insecure than ever, and she panics sometimes---with only paimonia to catch her.

paimonia/claude: u KNOW i’m here for some claudeleth. the only lord/byleth ship where the lord calls them ‘my friend.’ like THE EQUALITY OF IT ALL. but also i can see claude/paimonia on other routes, claude sending paimonia letters from secret messengers and spies. always wanting to be by their side....

paimonia/dedue: this ship’s ESPECIALLY cute with my dedue and your paimonia in particular because they both HATE crowds and love solitude. they are both quiet and kind, and the greenhouse is their special garden to just be themselves, quietly alongside each other....

😀 FRIENDS FOREVER.*bold is my character, italics is yours.

claude/dedue: claude mentions dedue in his speech against racism, and yet they never even TALK?! imagine dedue being the only one that knows claude’s secret because claude trusted him to tell him. dedue wants rights for every oppressed country, same as claude.

ignatz/sylvain: okay the LADIES’ MAN and the OPPOSITE OF THE LADIE’S MAN. i’m picturing a HITCH situation (a la will smith and kevin james), BOYS GETTING UP TO HIJINKS, IGNATZ NOT WANTING TO GO ALONG WITH THIS AT ALL, SYLVAIN DETERMINED TO MAKE IGNATZ A MAN WORTH WOOING, but also sylvain is really really bad at girls actually and ignatz is... disgusted. but they are friends, even if ignatz thinks sylvain is gross af.

esther/sylvain: i just want to interact with ur ocssss pal... LET ME AT EM...

dedue/esther: you mentioned EXPLICITLY that esther is pro-duscur rights and dedue would LOVE THAT, though he might talk to her about toning it down for the sake of her reputation... still, i see esther making dedue more confident.

dorothea/dedue: two muses without parents or ‘real friends’ find each other and find happiness side by side! both of them getting on each other’s nerves like siblings, but having each other’s backs... idk i just vibe with this lol.

😇 FAMILY VALUES. *bold is my character, italics is yours.

dimitri/paimonia: we talked about byleth being like dimitri’s THERAPIST MOM INSTEAD OF LOVE INTEREST BUT LISTEN... what if we made that... INTENTIONAL. paimonia being the parental figure dedue hasn’t had in years. this could be cute and good for character development---especially if paimonia doesn’t WANT to be dimitri’s parental figure and they have a long talk about boundaries, only for paimonia to feel forced into the role anyway, and it’s angsty and character development-y and good.

edelgard/fleche: post fleche’s brother dying, edelgard steps in. ‘nuff said!

👿 RIVALS TO THE END. *bold is my character, italics is yours.

dimitri/fleche: there’s a CERTAIN period of time in which dimitri and fleche are in the same place, and they both do absolutely nothing. i want them to talk. i want fleche to manipulate and dimitri to prove what an asshole he is. THIS MIGHT JUST BE A SINGLE THREAD BUT I NEED IT!

edelgard/dimitri: i find their dynamic really, really interesting, because edelgard could be so MEAN to dimitri, but she’s really, really not. i want to see their relationship unfold pre-timeskip, them trying to get closer for their own reasons (edelgard because it’s better to have the kingdom on her side for diplomacy, him because he wants to be close to the only family he has left). it’s mostly awkward, but it could be kind of sweet---up until things are REVEALED, AND IT HURTS EVEN WORSE.

dorothea/sylvain: i want a FULL HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL SHARPAY VS GABRIELA CONFLICT HERE. DOROTHEA BESTING SYLVAIN AT HIS OWN GAME---SEDUCING GIRLS AWAY FROM HIM WITH PLATONIC TEA PARTIES AND NOT-SO PLATONIC “SLEEPOVERS”.... SYLVAIN AGHAST. YOU CAN REJECT HIM ALL YOU WANT BUT WHY WOULD U STEAL HIS GIRLS.... meanwhile dorothea is regarded as hero, while sylvain plots against her to turn the tides in his favor...

[dillydedalus]

books i read in october

will i even read anything this month? MAYBE NOT (i did.)

der gang vor die hunde (going to the dogs), erich kästner  the restored full text of kästner’s fabian, a satirical novel about late weimar berlin and how it is.... going to the dogs. it’s witty, everyone is dancing (and uh, fucking) on the edge of the abyss, fabian sees the end of europe everywhere he looks, but my favourite bits were honestly kästner’s incredibly sharp & funny postscripts (one to the moral censors, one to the art critics - ‘this book is not for confirmees, no matter how old they are’), and the blurb calling berlin ‘der zärtliche moloch der moderne’/’the tender moloch of modernity’. 3.5/5

hier ist noch alles möglich, gianna molinari longlisted for german book prize. a short novel about a woman who decides to become a nightguard at a rundown factory where a wolf has been seen (maybe). mostly, it’s ramblings about borders/boundaries, intrusions and separations of space (the wolf coming into the factory, the fence of the factory, islands etc). it’s interesting, but it’s a bit too long for what it did. 2.5/5

when hitler stole pink rabbit, judith kerr i’ve had this book for like. probably 15 years? god. anyway, somehow i never read it and picked it up now to get it off the unread shelf. it’s a fictionalised account of kerr’s childhood as a refugee after her jewish family leaves germany just before the nazis come into power, and their struggle to make a living and find their place in the countries they escape to. it was really well-done, not overly didactic or sentimental & i should have read it as a kid i guess! 3/5 

die liebe unter aliens, terézia mora short story collection. i listened to the audio book, which only has 5 of the 10 stories (which i didn’t know before), so that’s a bit disappointing. anyway, the title means ‘love among aliens’, but sadly there were no aliens :(. just alienated people trying to find something/themselves/etc. i liked mora’s style, but the only story i rly liked was one about a japanese prof who falls in love with a goddess. 2.5/5, gave it 3/5 on goodreads bc i only heard half the stories 

buried in the sky, peter zuckerman & amanda padoan i find mountaineering disasters morbidly fascinating & am kinda obsessed with them (throwback to last year when i read into thin air & told everyone who’d listen not to climb everest & they were all like.... wasn’t planning to but okay??). k2 is only slightly less high than everest but much more difficult technically (all the climbers r like.... oh everest is so easy i wanted a real challenge like.... k). anyway this book is focused on a particular disaster on k2 during which 11 people died, as well as on the position, history, culture etc. of the indigenous ethnic groups that live in these regions & work for mountaineering expeditions (Sherpas being the most well-known but there are others as well!). since the authors weren’t on this expedition, it’s not quite as harrowing and immersive as into thin air  but it’s still plenty harrowing! horrible deaths! the deaths of the high altitude workers were incredibly tragic & while obvi the mountaineers’ deaths are sad too, i feel like they know what they’re getting into & they’re not doing it out of economic necessity but for like... fun? the rush? pride? idk. but anyway if you don’t wanna die... don’t go into the DEATH ZONE. it’s literally called the DEATH ZONE DON’T GO THERE. anyway yeah i find everything about extreme mountaineering super fascinating & terrifying & this is a good one, tho into thin air would be still my #1 rec. 4/5

wenn es nur licht gäbe, bevor es dunkel wird, iunona guruli tbh i mainly got this on overdrive bc i hadn’t really read anything from georgia (the country in the caucasus, not the american state). it’s a short story collection (mostly about/set in georgia but written in german) on themes like drug abuse, gendered, sexual & domestic violence and depression, so... not much fun here! there is a dreamlike quality to some of the stories which i think contrasted well with the quite dark themes, but overall the stories were too similar & blended together too much for me, and sometimes the style seemed a bit too laboured. 2.5/5 

unter weißen, mohamed amjahid really good, persuasive & engaging examination of racism in germany, accessible without being basic. i haven’t really read a book like this about specifically german racism and its particularities, especially one so recent (it was published in 2017 & the context of the ‘refugee crisis’ is rly important). amjahid (who’s a journalist with die zeit currently) works w/ a lot of personal anecdotes and they are uh. horrible. like, one chapter is about the paternalistic side of willkommenskultur, where he goes to munich train station to interview volunteers welcoming refugees and some of them immediately cast him as ‘helpless ignorant refugee in need of our benevolence’ & dehumanise him to the point that they don’t even register that he’s speaking to them in german like. fuck. 4/5

desintegriert euch!, max czollek (actually finished this a bit later but it goes well with the amjahid book) while amjahid discusses racism in germany both in general terms and specifically islamophobia, czollek focuses on german antisemitism and advocates for disassimilation & alliances between different marginalised groups in rejection of german ‘leitkultur’. also he talks about daniel kahn in a chapter on jewish revenge & i love daniel kahn. 4/5

the white guard, mikhail bulgakov (tr. from russian) look, the situation in kiev after the russian revolution and the multiple military take-overs of the city is interesting and all (tho incredibly confusing if like me you don’t know who any of the factions are or what they want), but where’s the devil? where are the witchy vibes? where is the demonic talking cat? 3/5

der vogelgott, susanne röckel so this was shortlisted for this year’s german book prize and i can totally see why. it’s disturbing, compelling, has a lot of conceptually interesting weird stuff going on and it almost really worked for me. it’s a story about three siblings haunted by a strange & horrible birdgod after their father, a hobby ornithologist and taxidermist, kills a bird he shouldn’t have. while the siblings live very different lives - one goes to a fictional african (?) country to work for an ngo, one is working on her doctoral thesis on a medieval german painter, the third is a journalist researching strange fears and dreams that are troubling the city’s children - all of them become entwined with this birdgod and the cult(s) surrounding it. my problem is mainly that the book uses the ‘too horrible to describe/comprehend’ trope way too much, which is effective the first few times but eventually wears off & just becomes annoying and like.... so what?? also, the first sibling’s chapter uses some very colonialist tropes about the savage religions and customs of the uncivilised natives, and while there is an attempt at subversion here (e.g. the same cult being present in medieval germany apparently), it didn’t feel like enough for me. but overall this is a really interesting, disturbing little book. 3.5/5

king lear, shakespeare (for uni) honestly... i expected more from this, tho to be fair reading it in a rush for a seminar (that ended up getting cancelled anyway) probably wasn’t ideal. overall i just.... didn’t feel anything about anyone (except the YAAAS BITCH vibes for regan/goneril/edmond’s shenanigans), many characters’ choices & actions didn’t make sense to me & i was disappointed that cordelia wasn’t a character as much as a ~pure selfless angel for lear to have feelings about. 2/5

currently reading: the bloody chamber by angela carter which i’m high-key loving, white dancing elephants by chaya bhuvaneswar, also two comics/graphic novels: john lewis’ march series and saga book one

[thehenryhiggs]

bre’s big ol podcast rec list

heyyy everyone! so @bodhilukes​ asked for podcast recommendations on twitter and @czarrish​ and i immediately jumped on that. i was gonna make this list sometime this month away, and im super excited to do it! this is probably gonna get long so under the cut we go!

COMEDIES:

1. Hello From The Magic Tavern

Updates: Every Monday

Current # Of Eps: 101

General Length Of Eps: 40 mins to an hour

Synopsis: Arnie Niekamp fell through a dimensional portal at a Burger King in Chicago into the magical, fantastical land of Foon. He’s still getting a slight wifi signal from the Burger King, so he hosts a weekly podcast with his buddies Chunt (a shapeshifter who normally takes the shape of a badger) and Usidore, a wizard. They interview different creatures from Foon each week as Arnie tries to learn about Foon, while also trying to figure out how to get back home.

Notes: Okay, I have to say it. This is my favorite podcast. I love it to absolute death. It 100% got me into improv comedy and comedy podcasts, to the point where that’s pretty much all I listen to anymore. Arnie, Matt, and Adal are sweethearts and the show is so genuinely funny and interesting. Please give this one a listen.

2. The Adventure Zone

Updates: Every other Thursday

Current # Of Eps: 57

General Length Of Eps: An hour, but there are a few that are two or three.

Synopsis: The McElroys play Dungeons and Dragons. But it’s also so much more than that.

Notes: Okay you all know how much I love this podcast. I love it to death. I’m still only like halfway through it but god it’s amazing and I’m so angry I didn’t start it earlier. All of the characters are amazing and Griffin is truly such an amazing storyteller. It’s so much deeper than you would originally think, and it will make you cry like a baby. Please listen to The Adventure Zone. Holy shit.

3. CoolGames Inc 

Updates: Every Friday

Current # Of Eps: 45, with some CGI Jrs mixed in.

General Length Of Eps: An hour (CGI Jrs are 20 mins)

Synopsis: Polygon’s Nick Robinson and Griffin McElroy take listener suggestions and make video games out of them.

Notes: These are my favorite soft boys, and they are just too funny. Some of the games they come up with are genuinely good games that you’ll be upset don’t actually exist, but most of them are just silly goofs that are guaranteed to make you laugh. This podcast single-handedly got me through last semester, so shoutout to Nick and Griffin for that. You should also check out CoolGames Inc Animated!

4. Improvised Star Trek 

Updates: Every other Monday

Current # Of Eps: 157, with a BUNCH of bonus eps mixed in

General Length Of Eps: About 30 mins for regular eps, 5 mins for bonus

Synopsis: These are the voyages of the starship Sisyphus, Starfleet’s worst crew. Captain Julius Valentine Baxter and his crew, including First Officer Corbomite Hayes, Science Officer Crick Watson, Ensign Laserbear, and Chief Medical Officer Zarlene Zonaldson, just to name a few, get into way too much trouble out in the final frontier.

Notes: I started listening to this because of Matt Young from HFTMT (and because I got super into Trek), but god I fell in love with every single character. Quite a few guests from HFTMT are regulars on IST, and their shenanigans are just amazing. If you love Trek, you’ll love this.

5. Siblings Peculiar 

Updates: Infrequently

Current # Of Eps: 29

General Length Of Eps: 30 mins

Synopsis: Adam and Sarah Peculiar (pronounced Pec-U-lAr) are trying to figure out what happened to their parents, paranormal investigators that suddenly disappeared 10 years ago. They interview conspiracy theorists of all sorts as they try to gain any information they can about their parents’ whereabouts.

Notes: I started listening to this one because of Adal Rifai from HFTMT, and I’m glad I did because he and his sister are so funny together. Their conspiracy theories are so off-the-wall hilarious (there’s a whole episode about Grease being propaganda where they interview the real creator of Grease), although I will say the comedy might not be for everyone as it can veer a little into the offensive (but it’s satire and I personally love it). It’s less frequent now because Sadieh got cast in a tv show, but I still recommend listening to it!

DRAMAS:

1. Welcome to Night Vale 

Updates: Bimonthly, on the 1st and the 15th.

Current # Of Eps: 103

General Length Of Eps: 30 mins

Synopsis: Cecil hosts a radio show in the mysterious town of Night Vale, where abnormal things like Glow Clouds, angels, ominous dog parks, and floating cats are commonplace.

Notes: We’ve all listened to WTNV at this point, right? Or at least heard of it? Besides an old Fringe podcast I used to listen to back in like 2008, this was the first podcast I ever listened to. Cecil’s voice is just incredibly soothing, I find this podcast really helps when I’m super depressed, and I used to stock up on eps specifically for those times. 

2. The Black Tapes/TANIS 

Updates: they used to be weekly but they look pretty infrequent now

Current # Of Eps: TBTP has 24, TANIS has 25, both with several bonus eps mixed in

General Length Of Eps: 30-45 mins

Synopsis: TBTP is about journalists Alex and Nic investigating The Strand Institute’s Richard Strand and his various black tapes that may be evidence of the paranormal. TANIS is the spinoff, where Nic focuses more on real life conspiracy theories as he tries to find the location of the mythical TANIS.

Notes: I’m not gonna lie, I did drop both of these podcasts and I’m not sure if I will pick them back up. But the first season of both were incredible, and @czarrish introduced them to me and they really got me into podcasts. In my opinion they both declined in quality during their second seasons, but that’s just my opinion!

3. The Penumbra Podcast 

Updates: I think it’s on hiatus? But I think it was bi-weekly at one point

Current # Of Eps: 19, with bonuses mixed in

General Length Of Eps: 30-50 mins

Synopsis: The Penumbra is the grandest hotel this side of Nowhere.The series mostly follows Detective Juno Steel trying to solve mysteries, but they’re all stories you recognize told in ways you won’t expect. 

Notes: Again, I’m not gonna lie, I’ve barely listened to this and I really don’t know that much about it. I had to take a lot of the synopsis from the actual one on their website. But the first two episodes were awesome, so I feel confident in recommending it. I think they might be rebooting it?? Idk, you might want to ask @czarrish for more details.

4. Alice Isn’t Dead

Updates: Season one wrapped in Jul 2016 and it’s been on hiatus ever since. edit: s2 is starting soon!

Current # Of Eps: 10

General Length Of Eps: 30 mins

Synopsis: Alice is a truck driver who’s driving across the country in search of her missing wife, who she thought had been dead but now has reason to believe otherwise.

Notes: This is from the creators of WTNV and features the voice of Jasika Nicole, who I know and love from Fringe but also does the voice of Dana on WTNV. It’s spooky but not too much so, and I’ve admittedly only listened to 3 episodes but just like Cecil, Jasika has a wonderfully soothing voice.

MISC:

1. Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Updates: Every Monday

Current # Of Eps: 148

General Length Of Eps: An hour

Synopsis: Basically what it says on the tin: two guys explain in detail everything that has happened in the X-Men universe, starting at the very beginning.

Notes: Again I haven’t listened to too much of this, but it’s really fun. I’ve loved X-Men for a while but I always get confused with all the retcons and different verses and stuff, but Jay and Miles do a wonderful job of explaining everything without making it confusing.

2. Terrace House Mafia 

Updates: Infrequently

Current # Of Eps: 14

General Length Of Eps: 10-15 mins

Synopsis: Polygon’s Nick Robinson and his roommate Chad watch Terrace House: Boys & Girls in the City and talk about it. That’s it. But it’s cute as fuck.

Notes: I absolutely love listening to these guys talk about Terrace House because they’re going through the exact same journey that I (and probably everyone) went on when I first watched it. It’s quick and super fun to listen to.

3. The Probe 

Updates: Was weekly, but s1 wrapped in November so it’s been on hiatus

Current # Of Eps: 8

General Length Of Eps: 30 mins

Synopsis: A satirical take on news podcasts, two journalists follow the election at Franklin Delano Roosevelt High School, and learn about the country’s political climate along the way. 

Notes: Again, I started listening to this because Matt Young from HFTMT produced it, but I really enjoyed it beyond that. If you like HFTMT, you’ll recognize a lot of the Chicago-based actors in The Probe. Also I wasn’t exactly sure where to put this so I just put it in MISC cuz it’s like... definitely funny and improvised but also it’s a little serious, maybe? Idk, it’s satire. And it’s great satire.

I’m also gonna include the podcasts that I’m subscribed to but I haven’t actually started listening to yet. They piqued my interest but I just haven’t gotten around to listening to them yet! So here we go: The Bright Sessions, Darkest Night, The Hilarious World of Depression, Hollywood Handbook, Homecoming, Lore, My Brother My Brother And Me, Reply All, The Room Where It’s Happening, Wolf 359, With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus.