#idek how to make art anymore

[a-real-life-hermit]

juppet

[harrysmaison]

your top 5 favourite fan artists in the fandom. go!

oh my god it's been a while since i've made any fanart or been involved in the creative side of the fandom at all and i had soo many if you'd asked me like 6 months before but i dont remember the urls anymore 😭 so this is just off the top of my head:

@thetriangletattoo @ialwaysknewyouwerepunk @ladychlo @evenasyoungastheyare @londonfoginacup + @rainbowbeanstyles

[xx-justsomeguy-xx]

i think drawing a little simpler like that has really revived some of the fun i have in making art? need to let go of thinking i need to complicate things… and that not rendering skin like i tend to with paintings isnt a waste of all the time i spend learning it all

[yuansie]

the greatest gamble of all

pairing. aventurine x gn! nameless! reader

synopsis. aventurine knows that he is unworthy of love, unworthy of you. because he, aventurine, is a tainted person and kakavasha is but a person with no future for himself. in both of his names, he is unworthy of you.

genres/aus. actually idek what type of au this would fall under saurrr idk what to say ummm friends to something more (?!), romance, pining, angst with a happy ending, smidge of fluff at the end

warnings. slight (or maybe not so slight at all?) spoilers about aventurine's background, mentions of death and murder, very sad and insecure aventurine, crying, slight displays of affection (a neck kiss?!), ooc aventurine ?! (bc im still doing the penacony quest HAHSHAJ)

wc. 1.6k

a/n. me when i only write about aventurine because aventurine is love, aventurine is life. also, i just have some serious brainrot for that man he deserves everything and more i love him sm !!!! also. aventurine this wednesday im SOOOO excited i need him NOW. will be skipping my first class so i can do his trial LMFAO and this NAWT edited !! (when will i ever edit something?? idk. whenever i am not a busy uni kid) the aventurine art was made by @/20231102thu on x (twitter) !!

AVENTURINE IS FULLY AWARE THAT HE ISN'T SOMEONE DESERVING OF, well, anything. he’s just someone that aimlessly wanders this world, not having a set destination. he doesn’t have anything worth living for.  he doesn’t have a home to return to because home means returning to a place filled with warmth and love. 

he does not remember the last time he felt his heart warm up, he’s not even sure if he’s even felt warmth. it is but a distant memory filled with sadness, such sorrow that makes his heart weep without knowing it. though, nowadays, he doesn’t feel like that. there’s just an emptiness in him, but he doesn’t mind it anymore. after the events at penacony, he’s just been… lost.

he hears a door open and slide shut, followed by the sound of footsteps. then, he senses someone standing right next to him as he gazes out the windows of the astral express. you spent a long time convincing the conductor and himeko that aventurine should be a guest, and you finally wore them out with your pleading after a good amount of hours. 

“penny for your thoughts?”

aventurine glances at you. your wounds from the battle are still healing, he notes, given by the bandages that wrap around your forearm and head. sunday will have to meet his fury on another day. “just thinking that this is a nice place.”

you chuckle, “it is, isn’t it?”

all he does is hum in response, still staring out in the vast expanse of space. he likes how the stars look and as his eyes linger on penacony, he wonders if his home looked similar to that. he wouldn't know because he never saw how it looked when he left and never will. his thoughts don’t linger on that much when he instead focuses on the way your fingers brush against his hand. he flinches and stares wide-eyed at how you easily grab onto his hand, a dirty piece of flesh undeserving of the warmth that radiates from your skin and seeps into his own.

“aventurine—”

“kakavasha.”

“hm?” you tilt your head to the side, blinking at him in confusion.

he wants to look away from you, from your eyes. but he wills himself to keep looking and somehow, he ends up gripping onto your hand tightly. you don't complain and instead squeeze back, patiently waiting for him to continue.

“my name is… kakavasha.” aventurine feels his stomach twist and turn at your silence so he continues to speak, “i just thought… that you should know it before it’s completely gone.”

“and why do you say that?”

“it’s a name meant to be forgotten in the sand.”

your response is so quick that it almost gives him whiplash. “no it isn't.”

“excuse me?” he blurts out, surprised that you even said such a thing about him.

“it isn't a name meant to be forgotten in the sand,” you say, a certain calmness in your voice that has aventurine waiting with bated breath at what else you have to say. “it's too pretty to be forgotten and, well, it's your name.” 

and then he feels his face heat up; his ears, neck and cheeks feel like they’re burning up.

“kakavasha,” you hum, smiling, “kava, for short. it has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?”

it does have a nice ring to it, but only because you're the one saying it. aventurine merely nods, not trusting his voice at the moment. he looks away and stares outside the window, not wanting to look at you anymore because he fears this warm feeling will take over his entire being.

a nice silence blankets over the two of you, one that you break after a while.

“what’s the story behind your name right now? aventurine… why are you called that now?”

“because kakavasha had no future,” he replies, “kakavasha didn’t have a future, he didn’t deserve to live either. who i am now, aventurine, does.”

“kakavasha deserves to live too.” aventurine turns his body to look at you, blinking in surprise. “i don’t know how you got that thought in your head, but kakavasha deserves to live just as much as the person you are now.”

“but aventurine is tainted. this name has too much blood on it, too many sins on it. the person i am now doesn’t deserve to live either. kakavasha should be a name buried in the sands of time while aventurine should be burnt to a crisp for the things i’ve done.”

yes, he is tainted. his body, his everything is tainted. it is marred by an ugly color, a stain of who he was and is, never to be cleaned. aventurine lets go of your hands, worried that you might also get stained by his sins. he should drive you away now before the aching in his small heart decides to cling to you and the warmth you give him. he will tell you his story, tell you about the mark on his neck, tell you how he killed the man that bought him, tell you about how he is a tainted person. he is a tainted person unworthy of you, unworthy of that love you hold.

he may have never experienced love. after all, all of his past relationships were purely physical. no one cared about going deeper beyond his facade, they all just wanted a fun night. so while he has never experienced it, he is no fool. he can recognize that the emotion in your pretty eyes when you look at him is love. you love aventurine, the him who has betrayed and used you and your companions in one way or another on penacony. he doesn’t understand why and maybe he never will because the mere fact that you feel something towards him is so bizarre.

so he should ruin whatever it is that you love about him and tell you the truth, taint your rose-colored view on him. aventurine needs to do it now before his heart tells him not to. he knows his heart is already lovesick, so needy of that bit of love it has received from you. his heart wants to hold on tightly to you and drown in you, drown in those feelings of yours. his tiny heart wants to love you too, it wants to love you just as much as you love him. he wants your everything to consume his entire being.

but after he tells you the truth, you will leave and you will be the first and last person he’s loved. you will be the first and last person to somehow climb over the tall walls he’s built around himself and crack open the facade he’s made.

but what if… what if you stay after everything? what will happen then?

it is that small hope that he ends up clinging to.

if he is blessed gaiathra, if he is lucky, then what if… what if this is his greatest gamble of all? a gamble of love: will he lose you or will you stay?

aventurine has made up his mind despite the rational part in him telling him to not even do it, yet he does. the words flow out of his mouth easily, though his heart weighs heavy in his chest. he expects to you leave, he really does because who would want someone as ugly as him? but the tears that leaves your eyes and roll down your cheeks catches him completely off guard.

“why are you crying?” he asks, his hands reaching out to hold your arms.

your lips quiver and a hand grabs onto one of his while the other reaches out, fingers stopping before they touch his neck. aventurine leans in without thinking and a shiver goes up his spine when your fingertips gently graze the marks on his neck. you rub over the marks, “you didn’t deserve any of that, kakavasha.”

“if i could, i would take this from you and any pain you’ve felt and will feel. i would take away all of the unpleasant memories that plague your mind. for you, i would do anything.” 

his knees buckle at your words and you both tumble down to the ground; he ends up being on top of you. your eyes widen when aventurine’s own tears begin to rain down, some falling onto your cheek.

“why would you say something so cruel to me?” he mutters. “don’t give me false hope. you should leave now before you do it in the future.”

“why should i leave the man that i love?” you purse your lips, your eyebrows furrowing.

aventurine shoves his head into the crook of your neck. “i am undeserving of you. i’m lesser than everyone in all of these galaxies.”

“you are not lesser than everyone,” you grumble, raking your hand through his blond hair. “everyone is the same because at the end of the day, we all want to love and to be loved.”

“i’m afraid i won’t be able to leave you now.” he hears you laugh softly, saying how his eyelashes are tickling you. he decides to get impossibly closer to you and bat his eyelashes more, smiling at the sound of your laughter growing in volume. “you’re stuck with me, so don’t say i didn’t warn you.”

aventurine’s breath gets stuck in his throat. he feels your lips brush against his neck. “i think the one who should be saying that is me… say, promise me you won’t leave?”

“shouldn’t i be saying that?”

“kava, promise me.”

“i promise. will you promise the same thing too?”

“yes, i promise that i won’t leave you.”

kakavasha, a name forgotten in the sand, was dug up and remembered, held in the hands of someone that treats like the most precious thing. kakavasha, who had forgotten how it felt to love and be loved, remembered the feeling because of a single person.

and kakavasha, blessed by gaiathra, won his greatest gamble of all time. he won you and your love, something he will now protect and hold onto tightly.

[myceliacrochet]

I feel so overwhelmed. I have no income, no stable place to live, and hundreds of people coming to me who need thousands of dollars each to avoid getting incinerated, starved, tortured. I make crochet -- when I can get supplies -- and I'm trying to make stickers, when I can get supplies... I'm not very employable and everything is so expensive and it's all falling on my roommate.

I need to hold a fundraising event

Everyone is either stretched to their limits helping or can't be bothered

I'm doing my best to reblog, follow, and react every single campaign I can that is either vetted or has a clean RIS. I'm telling myself that I'm doing enough by contributing art and promoting these campaigns, but the reality is people need money and I'm giving them condolences and things that may not help much.

I had a bit of success promoting Omar's campaign and foolishly believed I could get those kinds of results again. Tumblr staff is being beyond ruthless, attacking even the critical and dangerous vetting work people are risking their lives for on the ground.

I don't know what to tell people who are coming to me for help in what may be their last moments and I'm like "hey here have a shitty art I made that might make a miniscule difference but probably won't. All the best!" I try to respond through my actions instead of words because like Kurt Vonnegut said there's fucking nothing to say about genocide because no one's meant to say anything they're just meant to get blown up. So then I'm ignoring the people who most need help in the world, coldly turning away. So I say sorry and offer these small useless things as if it means anything and every day I lose more sanity and meaning in my life because doing less than what I can to help people not get genocided takes all the color out of my world. I can't imagine truly relaxing or enjoying anything until there's no genocide happening anymore, and I don't see that happening. I feel hopeless like I did in 2016 but this time there's no back door out.

Every time I start to work on something I feel hopeless like it won't work

I have to get my ass into gear, which means I need to:

- pick up my prescription for strattera, I guess I have that now. That will help me focus

- get back on my antidepressants as soon as Fatima's campaign hits $10,000. That will help me keep moving

- talk to other organizers so we can work together.

I am drowning, I am burning in this hxll created by my own culture. Every day they torture the children and the adults come into my DMs and scream help us please please someone help us.

All I can do is do my best every day. I'll keep moving forward

Doing something is better than doing nothing, gxddammit, which means I'm doing a good job I guess, it's just little comfort as I watch the children get engulfed in flames.

Like, I know I can't end all genocide on my own but there's got to be more effective things that I personally can do.

I guess I'll check out one of those lists of things you can do other than donating money

If anyone has yarn to donate and/or could cover shipping or help me find free yarn in my area, that would be so helpful. Because there's nothing I'd rather do than tune out and crochet most of the time and sell it for myself and others.

Please talk to me about how we can work together to help these precious people!!! I need to do more

@monstermashpotato @sylvianritual @gazavetters @determinate-negation @dlxxv-vetted-donations

@gaza-evacuation-funds @gazagfmboost @fly-sky-high-09 @90-ghost @nabulsi @halalchampagnesocialist @huzni @hussyknee @notallmensheviks @neechees @fuckyeahmarxismleninism @fayruz0-blog @gothhabiba @radicalgraff @marxism-transgenderism @marxist-lesbianism @voyagerprobe @workersolidarity @cheezbot @gayspacemonk @bogleech @slitherbop @butchniqabi

I guess I just need to work on my small business... Idek if I'm even helping by reblogging all this stuff, I'm just spending hours a day spreading stuff around to other people who can't really donate. I just seem to be wasting people's time who are going through genocide, I might even be only adding to their suffering. I don't know if I have the moral fibre to do this work, idk I just seem to cause bad things to happen to myself and everyone around me by dedicating so much time to reblogs instead of just securing an income, paying my bills, and being content to give a "reasonable" portion to genocide relief. I can't do that, I have to give all or most of myself but then I'm just a burden to my roommate and others. Or going all out and doing something really big that could really bring in the money they need

I'm sick but people need me

I guess what I'm seeing here is that I need to switch gears to working on crochet more and that will help me be able to help people and it will also be better for my mental health. I'll work on getting the supplies I need to continue. But idk I'll come back to this later and figure it out.

Thank you for listening I wish I could just let my brain scream to death but like people need me to keep it together so I can actually help but I'm at a loss as to how to help

I'll do it gxddammit I'll fucking get it done I'll crochet for this and it will make a difference and I don't have to suspend happiness until this is over I have to maintain some of that light of happiness within. It's not all on me we are working together

Hey 🩷 So I wanted to let people know that I am safe now. I'm back on my most necessary meds, I've applied for SNAP and general assistance, and I'm feeling stronger after having some more success promoting campaigns.

We are living during multiple holocausts. I take comfort in doing the work. We're making a difference in people's lives.

Thank you for helping me keep my head up. Let's keep going.

[rubywonu]

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 - 𝘅𝘂 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗵𝗮𝗼

summary: in which minghao flirted with a woman at an art exhibition without realizing that she was the artist.

pairing: xu minghao x fem!reader

genre: meet cute, museum au!.

warnings: talks about struggles people face in life, kinds sad?

w/c: 0.9k

nia’s notes: i do not know where i was going with this, it may be rushed, idek anymore. but enjoy!!

this is part of cutetober!

if anyone knew minghao it was because of his crazy love for paintings and art museums. so it didn't come as a surprise when minghao decided to spend an entire day at the 'everything falls' art exhibition by yn.

even if someone was slightly interested in art, they knew of yn. so when the opportunity to visit one of your exhibitions minghao rushed to the museum. it always amused him how everyone knew of your name but not your face.

minghao walked inside the museum and just by seeing the hue of orange and brown in his peripheral view, he was sure that today was going to be amazing.

minghao slowly walked over to the first painting, basking in all the emotions. the first painting showed leaves falling from the sky, each of them more dry than the previous one. minghao took a look at the name of the painting, 'as time flies'. it was obvious what the painting was conveying but the way it portrayed the message intrigued minghao.

minghao walked to the next painting and his mouth was wide open. painted on the canvas, was a woman, her back bare as she stared at multiple mirrors, each being broken in different ways and the women in the mirrors being older or younger than another.

now minghao had gone to his share of muesems and exhibitions but they never had such a mind-blowing way to convey one's emotions.

"failed and flawed." minghao turned his head to the woman walking towards him. "it's my favorite painting." it was an understatement to say that the woman walking towards minghao was pretty, in his eyes that woman was drop-dead gorgeous.

"i haven't seen any more of them but this has to be the best one so far." minghao turned back to the canvas and each time he looked at it, a new meaning behind it evoked in him. "what's your interpretation?"

"my interpretation is that this young woman looks at herself through different eras of her life and she remembers all her failed attempts in life and how her life was flawed but they calm down after she realizes the beauty of the falls in her life." you finished still looking at the painting in front of you, minghao's eyes never left you though.

he never thought about it like that and it made so much more sense now that he understood yet another version of it. "it makes so much more sense after having a beautiful woman explain it to me."

if minghao could, he wanted to slap his face. he didn't know why he said that and more importantly he was worried how you would take the spontaneous flirting. to his surprise, you laughed and played along. "i hope so, i don't explain my thoughts about my paintings to anyone, you know."

just as minghao was going to continue, he stopped right in his tracks. "my paintings? what does that mean."

you smiled and turned towards minghao, putting your hand out for him to shake. "im yn, the artist of the 'everything fall' collection."

minghao's mouth for the second time that day was wide open. "oh my god." he rushed to shake your hand.

"you're yn? that's amazing. i love your work. and about the flirting im so sorry. minghao what were you thinking?" minghao started to ramble and it added to your entertainment as you laughed.

"it's alright. i actually enjoyed it, to be honest." you smiled at him, and minghao felt like the world was going to end. you looked like you deserved your own painting, you were stunning.

"if it's alright to ask you, what was your inspiration for such an intriguing collection." minghao asked you the question you tried to avoid for the evening but you wanted to spill it all out to him, he felt comfortable.

"it's ok, just don't sell it to a publisher." you joked around and minghao cracked a smile at your answer. "last year, i took a trip around the country and visited a bunch of villages. during my stay, i met a group of women from different places who told me about their lives and the lessons they learned during their time on this planet. they told me about incidents that changed the trajectory of their lives either for the better or worse. that's why i chose to paint this, i chose to express their grief in brush strokes and paint, i guess while listening to them, i found out about the struggles in my life as well, either i didn't want to confront them or i never knew they existed."

"if you look at all the paintings you can see how mellow the messages behind the paintings get. it starts off rough and dark but as you walk by the pictures you can the gradual calm settling in, it shows the emotions that people feel when negativity strikes their lives. it shows the way people deal with those emotions." you finished your little speech and minghao was awestruck.

you talked about your paintings and minghao felt like he could listen to them forever. although it was your first meeting, minghao felt like the two of you met a long time back, it felt like the two of you shared the same soul.

you didn't realize then but for the rest of your life, you and minghao would go on for hours about your interpretation of paintings. the only thing that changed was that instead of being strangers, the both of you would be soulmates, and the both of you would fall deep in love all because of some paintings.

taglist: @caratlibrary . @caratsland . @kflixnet . @jyiiscool . @readingaddict420 . @pixieskie . @@anemoiant . @horanghae8 . @boooooseun . @wonwooz1 . @xomingyu . @bangchansbae .@weird-bookworm .

[thearcaneenthusiast]

BOY DO I HAVE SHIT TO TALK ABOHT.

ARCANE SEASON 2 OFFICIAL TRAILER ANALYSIS

(to my best efforts..)

Now I'm by all means a shitty analyser but I've still gathered enough to make a post about the trailer so here we go ganf

THE SCENE I REALLY WANNA YALK ABOUT

I do wanna quickly point out how good the fucking art of this stupid show is its actually diabolical

But this shows a bunch of people passing their respects onto jinx, (pls look at the blue hair)

In protests, even irl, people tend to do face painting, or some form of logo is presented so people can identify what they are protesting for.

After one singular Google search, the color blue represents open spaces, freedom, intuition, imagination, inspiration, and sensitivity

-> I think the different fonts I've highlighted is what I think Zuan is fighting for (or terrorising for idek)

Open spaces, because zuan is really really really underground, shitty air, very very claustrophobic.

Freedom is very very very unbelievably self explanatory

Sensitivity, Sensitivity as in they are fighting for their right to having some sort of right to feel victimised, so piltover can be Sensitive towards their situation (maybe idek you get what I'm saying.)

It also sets the tone for the scene I guess OK MVOIN ON

THINGS I POINTED OUT

"The arcane is waking up"

Personally, UHM!

I think these two scenes finna go hand in hand, I'm not rlly sure what's gonna go down with the arcane since bro I wasn't expecting all this BUT I'm so open to theories if you guys have any

OK HO BECAUSE WHO IS THIS I wanna say this is powder but I lowkey don't know it might be a protester with jinx but I deadass huh. This is something else I need help with so AGAIN REBLOG ??? COMMENT PLS THANK YEW

Shit screenshot sorry

This is most definitely during the (final)?? Battle. Like the one we see in the teaser trailer deadass Idk what's going on here right but I think it's gonna be Jinx's ult/idk whatever you league players call it. But it's gonna fuck vi up, and she's gonna breakdown to caitlyn, which leads to the "My sister is gone" talk

Big showdown between vi and warwick, again THE COLORSSSHUCWVCVUWC7HWFU

Blue is the color of the sky and ocean, and it can represent purity, truth, and clarity. Alternatively, it can represent sadness or coldness

Red is often associated with passion, love, and vitality and can also represent anger, danger, and aggression.

So yeah! The meanings definetly contradict eachother, but they all correlate with eachother in some weird cool way. We know warwick is vander, Vander loves his secondhand family, he has so much fight for them, he openly protects them. But now that he's Warwick, he's easily seen as dangerous and he's most definetly angry I'll tell u that

So before the trailer I thought these two wpuld be on opposite sides I WAS WRONG I WAS SO WRONG AND IM SO GLAD I WAS GENUINELY CELEBRATING

I think this is the thing that wakes up the arcane I'm reaching idk anymore

Idk if anyone else point this put

HES TALKING TO JINX LOOK AT THE FORNER LOOK AT HTW CONCNERJW

[ca-suffit]

This antiblack campaign the fandom just tried to kick up again (to avoid talking about the real issue with Nalyra) reveals how powerless they're starting to truly feel now.

They don't have many users left to vilify so they're putting people on blocklists who are brand new (I was here 3 days lol) or not even really in the fandom. That looks goofy and desperate but then it keeps going. DMing strangers to say "the truth" isn't about racism and "talk to me if you really want to know about anything." Everyone's reblogging those blocklist posts now and adding large commentary suddenly, when before they often fully sat it out. They're doing this in a group to look like they have larger numbers and are "revealing" there's a "big secret bullying problem"....except nobody believes them. Because there's plenty of accounts who are out here saying this shit straight to their faces and they pretend we all don't exist. All of this group has to manufacture drama solely because they just don't want to talk about harmful shit they actually do.

Neil has to make an antiblack statement she made suddenly be about antisemitism towards her, Nalyra's antiblackness is "actually" fans upset about shipping and "what's REALLY coming" in S2, showmey0urfangs is always happy to show up with her dumb screencaps and villain monologue nobody asked for so she can make her everlasting outrage about popular black fics and "feminized" Louis sound deeper than it is, Virginia suddenly cries about IRL issues and wants to leave the fandom because she wants to distract from the Nalyra receipts, Keybearer accused another black fan of trolling people and getting accounts suspended on twitter in 2023 when a Marius fan eventually confessed to it and his eternal shame for that means now every black fan except him is a bully (despite nobody talking about this ever anymore except him), chicalepidopterare mocks a black fan for blocking her "because I thought we were supposed to talk about racism" and then poorly tries to frame any retaliation against her to look like bullying ("see, they're misogynistic, they're bullying my art, they're mean for disliking these ships!").

To quote Claudia here, "You must think me an idiot." And the big cherry on top is also how none of these losers can stand to hear any mention of race....in the fandom of the show that nonstop talks about race. They're using very basic (and meant in a gentle, loving way) teasing of Jacob as proof that black fans are racist against Jacob too, black fans hate Jacob's white wife. People hate Lestat for being white too (what?). They can write crap meta all day about Lestat letting Louis "rape" him and only white victims (Lestat) being real victims to the evil black and brown "true" manipulators (Claudia, Louis, Armand) but gentle teasing from black fans about Jacob's haircut is the real racism. Okay lol. Care to tell us again why you think Delainey's Claudia looks "less innocent" now then? This 3D chess you think you're playing isn't playing how you think for anyone else.

I also notice that afaik there's not a single black American in this group. Idek if there's many Americans of any kind in the group. It's been a lot of shaming to black Americans specifically though, again from the show that's focused on black Americans....by people who aren't black Americans.

"There's people pretending to be black so it's okay to keep hating this whole group." It's not enough you already nonstop shit on black fans as it is, now you have to try to angle it as if none of this could be authentic in the first place. Vile behavior. For what? Tumblr isn't even a platform that pays you for whatever clout you have, so really what is the point here. In a small ass fandom on top of it. Some of you have pretty grown kids too, this is extra sad. It makes all the jumping through hoops to coddle Lestat's behavior make sense though, if you're the same kind of person yourself. Anyway, maybe you don't actually know everything because race exists in the real world beyond how Anne Rice wrote about it in her useless books! You make books written by a racist white woman your whole personality and guess what your outlook on life is going to be.

It's been really pathetic to especially watch any fans of color move more to this extreme bullying side as time has gone on. It will never pay off to promote white fandom ideals. These accounts you're trying to cuddle up to aren't even that big. The fandom outside of the tags actually has much more popular posts, supporters, and fics...although that's also half of what this all is actually about, fic numbers. Again, these are grown adults obsessing over this. We could have a whole different fandom if this group didn't exist and keep wanting to gatekeep everything and be the only people who get praise about anything.

It's no surprise that people who worship Anne Rice have major ego problems themselves. It's been fucked up to deal with but the good thing now is that big egos have big collapses eventually and that's what we're starting to see happening now. People are sick of you and able to see through your basic ass manipulation techniques. People just want to have a fandom, they're not here to worship fans who want to be dictators. Nobody is here for your fragility, losers.

[slasherwife]

Don't get me wrong, I like seeing asks with short s/o 'cause it's freaking adorable, but I would like to see one with s/o who is super tall? With Slashers? Like imagine someone like Michael NOT looking down at someone lol

Slashers with a tall!s/o

YASS the tables have TURNED

Desc: How is life with your slasher boo when you are taller than them?

Warnings: NONEEE

Note: I used “moddy” as a gender neutral term between mommy and daddy lmao don’t laugh at me for my word creativity 😭

‘Nother note: I LOVE HOW THESE PEOPLE BRUTALLY MURDER PEOPLE AND WERE JUST LIKE “the world does not deserve this person they are just so pure🥹😍”

ANOTHER note: HI GUYSSSS OMG IVE MISSED YALL SO MUCH idk why I had a random urge to finish this I usually never post anymore 😭

thomas hewitt

honestly with tom-tom u continue to make his heart race and his soul turn to flowers and sunbeams 🥹

when you walk into the room, with that ethereal smile on your face and stand next to him, he looks up at you like an astronomer would look up at the moon💓your presence is just so beautiful and powerful to him.

he doesn’t see you differently to if you were shorter. let’s get that clear.

you are still his significant other, you’re his one. he would rather rip his own heart out than allow anyone to shame you, or to disrespect, Gd forbid harm you.

gosh i can just imagine y/n and tommy cuddling up and y/n being the big spoon because tom-tom loves listening to your heartbeat and he loves kissing your hands and your collar bones and AHH— 💗💗

jason vorhees

bruh you’ve managed to give big boi jason whiplash. he is at first intimidated until he saw your face and it made his undead heart go “💓✨🥹”

you make him run away? this very attractive and cute flower person is scaring me, i mean look at them! they’re so pretty!😭 you manage to lure him out with some bread. jason loves bread.

he loves being hugged by you. while he is canonically very afraid to touch you because of his strength, nothing feels better, or more blissful, than to be wrapped in your loving energy and warmth💗

honestly it’s no different to him you being tall than to you being short 🙂 his priorities are all the same— protecc cute human, love cute human, and unalive anyone who makes cute human sad🤍

michael myers

ur taller!…. how fuckin dare you—!😠

michael is offended by ur existence. my man is 6’7. how you managed to reach beyond his height capacity is beyond him.

He has a tough time intimidating his s/o when he has to LOOK UP AT THEM.

This slasher is petty and will plop you down at the bottom of the stairs while he stands on a higher step to look down on you

And he does this for shits and giggles 🥲💕 And when big angy man needs to show WHOS BOSS >:(

He is an angy man. But he loves being the little spoon 🥹 hugging you is like being wrapped in a warm blanket of safeness and he LOVES ITT

You’ll never know this though since he is literally the most stoic man to ever exist. He is a wall of zero emotion.

bo sinclair

Literally holds this against you

This literally angers him

He can’t talk cuz he’s probably like 5’8 (we love short kings) but is still just absolutely appalled that you are taller than him.

Will be the little spoon. We see him being so macho in the movie— is he projecting? Yes. He loves being cuddled into a burrito blanket by you.💝😭

Idek why but this brings out his submissive side like helllll he’s like “moddy give me cuddle please” 🥹💗

THIS IS SO FUNNY TO THINK ABOUT but like as every human being sometimes he can’t reach something, and you’ll be walking by like “oh do u need help with that?🙂”

Like super non confrontational, and then he’s like “🗣️WELL SINCE YOURE LIKE A GIRAFFE THEN FINE” you could literally be one inch taller than him and he’d call you something like beanstalk and then you’re there like ;-;

vincent sinclair

THIS👏MAN👏DOES👏NOT👏CARE👏

BABES

Everything about you is worshipful. You are art spat out from the heavens sculpted by aphrodite and the angels, like your height is just more evidence of your beauty 🥹💕💕

He will always look up into your eyes in pure amazement and love no matter how far up he looks😇💕

THE WORLD DOES NOT DESERVE THIS MANNN UGHH

He wants you to carry him. Again, you could be just one inch taller than him and he’d be BEAMING as you carry him bridal style like you’ve filled his Disney princess dreams LMFAO 💗💗

Makes so many freaking sculptures of you. One life sized one to keep him company while you’re away🫶

HE LOVES YOUUUU

[onomatopagu-et-cie]

HAPPY 19TH DGM ANNIVERSARY & some other notes on DGM!

I'm a little late but HAPPY 19TH DGM ANNIVERSARY!!!! Time flies fast and this series accompanied my thoughts and heart for almost two decades now!

This first preface will stay a long time in my thoughts. Thank you for letting us join in on your wonderful journey, Hoshino ⋆｡°✩

I recently listened again to Blue Moon sung by Ella Fitzgerald and ... it's giving me Mana, Allen and Neah (or the whole cast haha) feelings ;;

I had some other notes I wanted to share since the previous post, so here it goes!

(SPOILERS UP TO CH247!!!!)

▶ Innocence & Akuma and Timcampy Innocence is attracted by Akuma, as though they once formed a whole together:

(the imagery here haunts me, especially with a heart in the background and the cross in the middle!!)

-> the story insists on informing us Innocence and Akuma balance each other and hold equal power over each other -> at the Asian branch, Allen’s Innocence reactivates only once he saw an Akuma ; the 3rd generations arm and Allen’s Innocence activated on their own when they were close -> the Innocence takes the shape of a bust deprived of head, arms and legs, but it has wings (and the recent chapters mainly represent Innocence with wings eg. Mugen, Apocryphos and Allen) ; the Akuma egg is a head in itself -> the Innocence’s mark on the exorcists looks like a cross but also the stigma on the Noah’s forehead -> both evolve in the same fashion. However, Akuma seem to me visually more ‘complete’ than the Innocence (eg. in Phantom G ark, even the children, the Prioress and Emilia thought a Level 4 was an angel): some are seen with more defined human features, wings, halo, tail, horns altogether. It’s curious how Level 4 Akuma (and Alma also) are designed with a halo, which is generally a symbol of holiness in art.

-> Skull use what looks like ladybug to create their barriers (which can prevent anyone except Akuma from entering, nullify Allen’s left eye power and his ability to summon the Ark).

In some cultures and languages, ladybugs are often seen as a good-luck charm and are linked to heaven and God. For example, in french, we call them ‘bêtes à bon Dieu’ (something like God’s creature) since the Middle Age. Its name can even be associated with the Virgin Mary (ladybug/bird or in german, Marienkäfer means Mary’s beetle). In japanese, the word for ladybug is 天道虫, ‘tentou-mushi’ which literally means 'Heaven Path bug'. It can also be written with the kanji for 'red' and 'girl' respectively, 紅娘.

Now, this is a wild reach which might lead nowhere (surely like the others 8D), but the Crows are the only ones described by their red silhouettes (you would expect their costumes to be jet black, by their title) and the two red dots on their forehead. There are also many black ladybug species with two red spots on their wings eg. the twice-stabbed lady beetle.

-> Just another wild speculation but if the song heard when the Dark Boots crystallized itself around Lenalee was the lullaby (the only song mentioned in the story along with Lala’s and Maria’s), what to make of it?

While the Innocence only affected non-exorcists (supposedly because its will is overwhelming to them, according to Bookman), Level 4 Akuma seem to have the same head-crushing cry and it incapacitates exorcists, to the point that they struggle to synchronize.

Only the dead like Maria seems to remain unaffected. However, in ch147, Link was still able to move to save Allen from the collapse.

-> The only instances Akuma and Innocence use each other’s attributes are Akuma 4 (wings) and Fallen Ones’ (halo) designs.

-> The Earl is determined to keep the Akuma’s true nature hidden from the Heart, because there’s something in there it could use as an advantage. It suggests something could directly be done by the Heart if it knew that piece of information eg. control both Innocence and Akuma or turn Akuma into Innocence or vice versa? Idek anymore haha

-> Timcampy is the only character to have both the Innocence and the Akuma/Earl attributes, wings and horns. And we also had THIS cover (the second picture, I never saw it colored before I re-read DGM and idk if this was established it was Timcampy):

Not to mention Timcampy’s weird deus ex machina entrance to motivate Allen again in ch53 (when he was giving up on saving Suman)?

▶ The Chang, Akuma, Skulls and Link A detail I forgot to mention in the first post was that Link’s tattoo, as expected, share the same motif with the ones inked on the Chang to link them to Fō as it’s shown in volume 21. Similar tattoos were on Alma’s arms and belly since that magic was also used on him.

Level 4 Akuma and Skulls also share the same marks?????

Fô’s head ‘accessory’ looks like the Akuma egg’s design:

Skulls (the katakana highlighted in green on the screenshots), like the Chang family, are also sorcerers. The manga introduces them in japanese with the title 守化縷 (the kanji highlighted in yellow on the screenshots), which literally can be translated as ‘guard(ian) of the thread’.

Now what's a synonym of thread?

… It’s Link!!!! The coincidence goes even further with Link’s last name, Howard. According to wikipedia’s entry:

????????? I don’t know what to make of this, but this sure isn’t pure coincidence. This and the way Apocryphos and Lavi called Link ‘watchdog’ as well as Kanda ‘Luberrier’s dog’ insists on his role as a guard. But whose? Allen’s? Luberrier’s? Somebody/thing else?

-> According to his profile in volume 20, Edgar Chang Martin, part of a secondary Chang branch, was related to a great sorcerer involved with the Order. The sorcerer was german. Link is also german (like Kiredori, Tewaku, Goushi, Madarao and Tokusa), I don’t believe we have other german profiles in the story nor blondes like him, Bak’s father and Bak himself (oh, and I forgot ofc our girl Miranda!!). Link could be related to that great german sorcerer and thus be an heir of Atuuda, unbeknownst to Zuu (but I wonder how that would be groundbreaking for the story?)

-> the spells the Chang use could be related to/even originate from the Skull’s (given how the manga hints at how ancient Skull’s sorcery is). The operation to bestow the power to cast magic to the Crows could be similar to how the Skull tinkered with the scientists’ head in volume 15.

-> heck, dude could even be linked to Timcampy, they’re both gold (I’m half-joking at this point idek anymore 8D) and Timcampy uses the same sanskrit-inspired magic as the Skulls (eg. when Tim destroys the barrier to save Allen during his battle against Alma and Kanda). Hoshino also emphasizes the importance of the gold color in the manga (the Noah’s eyes, Timcampy, Allen getting hungry over this color, the Campbell mansion’s landscape, …) just as the silver/gray color, so there might be something? Also, Cornelia’s wood can destroy Timcampy. Cornelia derivates from the latin cornix, which means crow…………… Please e x p l a i n

Also, what is this ‘thread’ the Skulls have the duty to protect? Their main duty is to protect the Akuma egg?

Now three things will keep bothering me until we get answers in the manga:

1)

2) These pages following each other (and the last two are literally back to back, it’s more visible when you read the physical copy + it’s Link’s right hand and Allen’s left):

(Of course I know Atuuda acted up once Link subconsciously shook when he thought of Apocryphos and this is a smooth way to have a transition to Neah’s pov, but the panelling is still interesting here)

3) What Zuu really meant to say to Link before he was interrupted by Luberrier (and I don’t think it was the whole ’becoming the 14th’s ally’ because Luberrier was clear on that in front of Link only some pages later)?????

▶ Cross and his mask Hoshino hinted that both Lavi’s eyepatch and Cross’s mask are mysteries to be unveiled. The mark on his mask looks like the Innocence and the Noah’s stigma. It also looks like Mana’s Pierrot makeup, or even the Pillar mentioned in volume 27:

The shape of his mask looks like a coffin? (It could also be a visual recall of Grave of Maria, but who knows!)

It reminds me of the "La" + "Vi" cover and the 'box' protecting the egg also looks like a coffin:

▶ Road We now know Road was even able to manipulate Allen/Neah’s dreams without even interacting with them (unlike with Lavi). She even invited Cross’ dreamy-whatever-consciousness in it (because I’m sure Cross himself was conscious of it to some extent and was able to give some hints to Allen even though he was used by Road), which persuaded Allen to go to the Campbell mansion. Could it be that she also tampered with Lenalee and Allen’s nightmares after she met them (or at the very least Allen, since the manga shows how the dream strongly motivated him to reactivate his Innocence)?

I find it even more curious she’s named like that when one of Allen’s elements of crisis over his identity is following a road already traced by somebody else.

Road might have something to do with the Heart (that and also the fact her iconic door is heart-shaped, with a checked pattern and a crown on top?)?

▶ Apocryphos Ch247 finally established the link between the Cube’s prophecies and Apocryphos: the Cube is regarded by the Order as the official « text » on the Innocence and the three days of doom, the Heart is mentioned but there is no trace of Apocryphos in there. Just as the truth on the 3 days of doom the Noah claim to exist. Also just as the Heart is capable to create dupes to escape the Earl. Apocryphos is a literal reference to the apocrypha, texts deemed unauthentic by religious authorities. According to the Cambridge dictionary, « an apocryphal story is probably not true although it is often told and believed by some people to have happened. » The one the most tricked so far in the story seems to be the Order.

▶ Cross in volume 17

In volume 17, Cross asks Allen « What if I told you that when you become the 14th you will have to kill the people (or someone) you care about? ». To which Allen answers: « What do you mean I have to kill the people (or someone) I care about?! »

In the original version, Cross uses « daijina ningen (人間) » for ‘the people (or someone) you care about’ ; Allen uses « daijina hito (人) ».

Which is curious for Cross because hito (人) would generally be used here: both mean human, but while 人 refers to ‘human’ as a person, 人間 refers to ‘human’ as the species in a taxonomic classification. Is it to highlight the true nature of Neah as a Noah apart from the humans Allen came to care about along his way? Does Cross also set himself apart from the humanity as a 3rd party?

▶ Funny how Link and Mana can be associated in the manga: -> ch137, « Orphan and Clown », introduces Link to Allen when he’s still trying to figure out why the Ark’s partition uses the signs Mana taught him and is questioned by Link about it. It is later revealed in the manga Link was an orphan before joining the Crow. -> in ch183, Allen inadvertently voices his memories of Mana to Link -> in ch212, « Searching for A.W.: Calling You », as Allen loses consciousness, fighting Neah’s awakening, he calls out to Link but instead is greeted by a vision of a young Mana, calling out to Neah. This chapter also introduces the importance of Allen’s name to save him from Neah’s dreams. The original version for ‘Calling You’ is ‘’君を呼ぶ ‘ (kimi wo yobu). ‘Kimi’ is the pronoun both Mana and Link use in the manga ; past!Allen also seemed to use it with Neah. Johnny and Kanda both use omae for Allen.

EDIT: Allen also uses 'kimi' so the chapter's title works both ways (in French, the title was translated as "Écoute ma voix" which is "Listen to my voice", I like the way the calling works interchangeably!)!

-> in ch213, Link faces a mirror shirtless like Mana does later in volume 25:

-> in ch220, « Searching for A.W.: He Closes His Eyes Tighter in a Vortex », Neah recalls the Earl he’s Mana but remains in denial and Link admits being conflicted over Allen and Neah

Link, Neah and Cross share similar positions and the panelling adds to this parallel:

-> Link was given the order to aid Neah but hopes that Allen overcomes his fate as his host.

-> Neah awakens years later and faces the Earl, struggling with Mana’s memory ; he’s determined to destroy him even if he holds him dear.

-> Cross had to witness Mana's struggle against the Earl. Yet he still had to carry on his mission even when the Earl possessed Mana. Then he had to watch Allen being slowly taken over by Neah. Cross's message in ch173 hits even harder given his link with Mana and Neah: "You may not want to listen to someone like me who carries the will of the Fourteenth… But if you think either of us is forcing you to walk a certain path… I want you to know that’s not true. A path forms behind you as you walk. The earth you step on is compressed, leaving a print. You’re the only one who can make your path. So stop wearing Mana’s mask. Walk in your own if you haven’t given up." Perhaps he even said similar words to an anguished Mana (or he wished to have said them). He had to watch them go, one after the other, helplessly.

▶ The moon, D. and C.

Are the D and the C just stylized in Mana and Luberrier’s names? At least for Mana’s and Neah’s, the D. could hold some meaning since it even was ch218’s title. Hoshino dreamed to become an astronaut, loves the moon and the stars (they’re even part of her name and her own mascot) and used it a lot in her previous works.

In DGM, the moon is seen in its different phases at important moments. It mainly signals the passing of time (eg. how long has Allen been on the run) or gives atmospheric context to the scenes, but sometimes it holds a symbolic meaning:

-> The first Noah reunion shows the moon phases on each chair

-> It is part of the Musician's Score's lyrics (from the french official translation): « Tu étincelles, toi, l’enfant né sous une tremblante lune d’argent. » which could be « You shine, the child born underneath a trembling silver moon ».

-> It frames a romantic scene between Crowley and Eliade:

-> The moon and the stars are used in chapter titles eg. ch129, « Black and white, 0° » (a reference to the new moon) and ch144 « Black star, red star »

-> It’s foreboding in Lenalee & Allen’s nightmares and Allen’s prophecy as the Destroyer of time:

-> The full moon appears when two characters reunite: in astronomy, a syzygy is a « situation that occurs when the sun, the moon (or a planet), and the earth are in a straight line. This occurs when the moon (or planet) is at conjunction (new moon) or opposition (full moon) ». Syzygy comes from the ancient greek συζυγία which means junction, reunion.

Mana and Red’s first meeting, as Mana sings the lullaby:

Allen and the Earl’s ‘first’ meeting:

Allen and Link reunite:

As for the D and the C, when the moon waxes it is shaped like a D, and when wanes it appears as a C. Could this be a coincidence? The C in Luberrier could also be Campbell, but for now the mystery surrounding his family is far from being revealed.

▶ Timothy and Allen In ch183, « Wash your face and you’ll be alright », Timothy and the Prioress face the sunset the same way Mana and Red did as later revealed in ch238:

Have a nice week!

[self-indulgent-paw-patrol]

So, if Ryder is neurodivergent, is his special interest engineering/inventing or puppies? Because he has built a lot of stuff, bases, vehicles, rescue gear, if I were to list everything he built we'd be here all day, but almost all of it is either for the pups or related to puppies in some way, the only exception I can think of off the top of my head is the vehicles and gear he makes for himself, I mean he built a robot dog one day just on a whim and created an ever expanding rescue team revolved around dogs, and he has six pet pups, that is not a normal amount of pets, though, granted, I would also have a ridiculous amount of dogs if I could, but I'm also neurodivergent and currently obsessed with dogs so that's just another point for 'Ryder's special interest is dogs' I mean it's entirely possible they are both special interests of his, I just can't help but look at Ryder and think "your love of dogs goes away beyond normal people, you literally surround yourself with anything and everything dog, and I'm honestly kinda jealous" as a neurodivergent I can confirm he is one of us, you can't change my mind

He's totally one of us

And you'd be right to say these are BOTH his main interests. He just put two and two together and found out he could COMBINE his interests into something bigger and greater.

I have a bunch of main interests myself: Art, equines, canines, cars and the ocean life, to name the main ones. The funniest part is that my family hasn't owned any kind of motorized vehicle since a couple years after I was born so literally the only VERY VAGUE memory I have of us owning a car was an old busted white vw bus which wasn't even driveable anymore and would just stay parked rotting in the farm lot until dad sold it away to a scrap/junkyard. Still, somehow, I grew to have cars as one of my main fixations and Idek how to drive lol Never sat behind a wheel. I wish I could put two and two together and combine my love for cars and for art to work on customizing/wrapping/painting cars in cool designs. And have a farm near a beach. I'd surround myself with horses and dogs there and make damn sure they'd all have the best life they could ever wish for too.

Ryder is very lucky to have such a "specific" couple fixations and have the means to combine both AND MAKE IT WORK, I'm jealous too. Kid literally went "I like engineering, I wanna do something with that, but I don't want to build things just for the sake of building them, I want them to have a purpose, to make a difference. I also love dogs, I think I'm gonna adopt a bunch of 'em. And give them cool looking pup-houses. And these houses could be their vehicles! And we could have a cool elevator and a slide around a tower. And I could train my dogs to help people. We could help people in town and do a lot of cool stuff together, I'll build them equipment and dress them up for duty and--"

And he just never stopped, resulting in a new subseries ever so often, BECAUSE HE LITERALLY CAN'T STOP HIMSELF FROM COMING UP WITH NEW STUFF FOR HIS PUPS

[evillex11]

might get flamed 4 this but comments like “gege is just killing everybody now, gege needs to stop cooking, gege doesn't know what he's doing, etc.) r getting annoying ngl like they're posting that on every chapter no matter what happens 😭 and it's fine to criticize something obviously that can't be avoided but these empty comments that provide no actual/meaningful input into the criticism is just so redundant 💀

+1. these kinds of comments kinda encourage the disrespect gege receives... cuz they leave these kinds of comments everywhere to the point where it's pretty icky. and not much ppl bat an eye cuz some might think it's all lighthearted or normal when rlly, it's getting a bit too far. like there's ppl who r genuinely saying he deserves to get sick n stuff?? bc he kiiled ur favorite character?? bc u don't like the manga??? 😭wtaf

+2. y'all have something to say when a character “has plot armor” and y'all still yap when a character doesn't... so rlly there's no winning 💀and I, personally, don't think jjk is meant to be one of those “defeat evil with the power of friendship” shows,,, mind you, they are going up against a supernatural being who's named the king of curses and is known to be impossible to beat—of course that 17 year old ain't gonna beat his ass just cuz everyone's counting on them??? nor will that adult who's never encountered a being that strong before. it feels kinda corny saying this but the outcomes of the battles in jjk are a bit more realistic ... “gege's just killing everybody now” obviously they're going to die???? they're going against a power beyond them what do you expect 😭 i get that it's a fictional show but the characters are still humans ... even with their cursed techniques and weapons, they're not always gonna survive ... not every plan or tactic of theirs r gonna work or turn out the way they expected

+ they're at a war with something rlly powerful so ofc they're gonna fire every shot they have which, in this case, are their comrades

+ it has been addressed by the show/series itself that jujutsu tech lacks the manpower to protect everybody, this is literally part of geto's reasoning for his actions—he knows he and/or his fellow sorcerers r bound to end up with a pile of their colleagues' bodies bc there arent much sorcerers in the world esp ones that could survive for a v long time. if a character is aware of this, that means gege is as well bc he literally wrote him to think about that

+3. if u hate the writing so much JUST DROP IT 🤯 crazy idea, never been thought of before, I know !! but some comments rlly are not necessary.... just stop reading if u can't take it anymore... no one is forcing you to read it. and if u feel compelled to cuz u already read so much, then don't leave harmful comments towards gege?? it's so easy to stfu and be a decent person on the internet 😭 you're contributing nothing by leaving comments like that under someone's work. if u hate how it's going so much then go make an au and satisfy urself. it's just so unnecessary

+4. idek if gege gets paid enough to deal with reader's bs ... people need to remember these mangakas are also people with real lives who are just trying to live and get by. some authors rlly get dehumanized just bc of the art they make

idc if I get called a dickrider,, as an artist myself I'm just so annoyed I'm sawry 😓😓 drawing and writing takes a lot of work.. I get concerned abt gege's well-being when the quality drops a little in the manga. maybe they're seeing something that I'm not, that's why they leave comments like that. maybe I got something wrong too, I'd like to be enlightened if that's the case /gen

[starrzies]

★I Was Scammed out of $285 by my Ex. [Open Commissions]★

Any and All Shares are Appreciated! This situation SUCKS.

DO NOT WITCHUNT OR HARRASS THE PEOPLE INVOLVED. I DO NOT SUPPORT OR AGREE WITH ANYONE WHO CHOOSES TO DO THIS. I WILL BLOCK YOU ON ALL PLATFORMS IF YOU DO THIS SHIT.

**Little mistake on slide 5!! The top little but of the PayPal details are the same as the top 2 in the HQ image beneath, that is my bad. I should not have rushed this post as much as I did :( **Second mistake, the $15 payment from him on 1/11/24 was a commission. That was not him paying me back. **HIS NEW PARTNER WHO CLAIMS I FINANCIALLY ABUSED HIM IS A MINOR. Why is a minor making those claims and in the business of 2 grown adults? Partner or not, they should not be saying this without full context or even be involved in the first place.

EDIT‼️‼️ I just found out 8 days prior to me sending him the first amount of money he was bragging about how much money he had.

Proof is below.

Idek what to say anymore. Post says everything basically.

Feel free to form your own opinions. Any and all help and shares are appreciated as well. NOTE!! I have detailed his behavior in screenshot form on my close friends story on Instagram FOR MONTHS, PEOPLE HAVE SEEN WHAT HE DID TO ME AND KNOW WHO HE REALLY IS.

I am disgusted, I am hurt, I feel violated after everything that he did to me. I was no saint, I did wrongs and I am not afraid to admit it. However, what he did to me and everyone else involved is not okay, there are THOUSANDS of screenshots to prove what he did and how vile and disgusting he truly is. He has lied to so many other people to who I can't even find or begin to look of because of his secrecy,

I want to move on with my life. I have begun to. I want to heal and close this chapter, but not without atleast trying to fill that hole which should have been filled.

Do not make the same mistakes I did. Stay the fuck away from him, for your own sake, for mine, and for the other people involved.

No callout post for the other things he did will be made. This is it unless the time comes. He has my personal details and can use it against me. I am not trying to piss him off to that point.

I'm hurt and I was used along with so many other people. I'm tired of this and I'm tired of him.

Thank you everyone for the support and I'm sorry for bringing this forward but I will not be silenced.

Please consider commissioning me or buying my charms, it would mean a lot and will seriously help me as I job hunt <3

[pomribs]

i dont know if the brainworms have ever been this strong. i keep feeding them and they just keep growing stronger. hannibal, more specifically will graham, more specifically s1 will graham, is genuinely so all consuming its started leaking into my dreams and everything is a hannibal reference and omg will me is so me help??? i actually cannot stop thinking about him like u do not KNOW HIM LIKE I DO. ive been ghosting people a lot more recently because the only thing that doesnt drain me physically and mentally after 5 minutes is my fixation. ive dropped all hobbies except watch hannibal, draw hannibal, sit and think about hannibal. i get bored of music unless its from my hannibal playlist. i quote it 20 times a day. i turn every conversation into soemthing hannibal related. i failed my art exam bc i wasnt allowed make anymore pieces on religion or cannibalism so i got bored and just decided not to do it. all day every day no exaggeration idek how to express its all i think about. im hashtag cringefailing SO hard rn

this post is literally actually nothing i just wanted to ramble ill delete in a few hrs LOL sorryyyy for being meaningless on ur dash forgive me

[monosanimegenericzone]

Hunter x Hunter: pain packer pt 5

idek how the numbering works anymore

but i had some thoughts about the other forms of pain packer and about specifically what flavors of pain there actually are

its more about the types of injury i guess but i'm going to use flavors bcs that sounds funny.

so we have: - Broken Bones - Lacerations/Bleeding - Burns - Internal Damage (other than bone)

and so my crackhead ass went: so what if each correlated with a type of damage output. And each type has corresponding level numbers to declare the intensity of the output.

so Broken Bones we see in the show leads to fire. aka the sun. I believe it starts small as the heat of a roaring bonfire (equivalent to maybe a broken arm or a a broken rib) to a neutron star (nearly every part of him is broken and he is not okay)

Lacerations are water based attacks. And unlike heat it's a less effective killer- but i remembered that you can shoot water fast and the speed alone can pierce flesh. That and cold shocks exist :3. So because of this, he will have had to lose a substantial amount of blood to trigger basically a sub zero, butt cold frigid body of water to shock the opponent into pseudo paralysis and then drown them. other forms might include hurricanes or The Great Wave (haha arts joke arts joke-)

Burns, contrary to the obvious, i think would manifest as electricity. Its a less common form of damage since people know that fire attacks are borderline useless against other nen users since ten and ren act as shields. but, a skilled fire user with enough power could probably do some damage. there's not so much variation here but i imagine it's just the number of lightning strikes the opponent will receive relative to the amount of damage. i think the slowest death (but still painful) is when he literally just short circuits the vagus nerve and forces you into a heart attack. whereas the fastest death is just being struck by the bolts of zeus himself.

and then Internal damage manifests as air related damage. this one he can definitely get more creative. he can either create gale force winds capable of ripping skin from flesh or he can create a perfect vacuum and make the person explode from lack of atmospheric pressure or the exact opposite and create a bulk of air so heavy that it crushes them flat much like how alluka smashed mitsuba flat.

(missing limbs would combine laceration and broken bone, drowning would include internal damage, bruises count as internal damage, internal bleeding is up for interpretation but it could be internal damage or laceration)

food for thought.

i dont know what i believe, but imagine him just casually having 20 unique hatsus (assuming each type has 5 levels). like bro is built different.

i might make another post detailing the scaling of each bcs i think it'd be interesting.

and of course my personal post mortem hc of mortem vindicta but that's something completely different XD

[pastelpousay]

Hi again…I’m sure we all know what the hell this is for 😭💀

Sorry ik I keep coming on here about my stupid personal problems but lowk I think I might take another break I still wanna draw and write and stuff but that junior year depression hit me so hard I literally can’t rn 💀 I feel so isolated and alone and I feel like my friends hate me ( except for like one but still I don’t even get to see them cuz we have no classes together anymore.) I’ll still post art when I feel like it but I think the depression actually hit me so hard I don’t even care about how many people like my art anymore 💀 that’s saying a lot and school is not a help- I’ve felt like this for a while even before school but like at least I can write it off now I can’t and it’s literally only the second week 💀💀😭 this shit is sad as fuck.

So yea I might just go offline I hope to come back on here and I may like stuff every now and again and check in on some people but other than that idk I just feel so unmotivated I haven’t done much of any digital and the ones I did I hate or I just don’t feel like working on them, like I legitimately feel awful 😭 Hades and Rina is my only comfort it makes me so happy I love talking about them idk why I made it feel like such a job when literally no one gives a fuck about this shit but me. It’s why all my friends hate me, why everyone thinks I’m weird. And literally I already know no one in my school fucks with me they legit look at ppl like they’re some science experiment. This is basically a fucking repeat of last time but yea. I literally can’t it’s about to be my birthday and I feel so ass I’ll post for my birthday but that’s it I can’t do this anymore I love Hadina with all my might I want them to be real I wish they were I don’t understand why I have to here at school practically completely isolated I feel like I don’t have anyone anymore, like I don’t even feel important whatd the point do I even matter at all?? Like what if people just pity me or something idek why I care I feel so stupid saying this but I need to get it out and I can’t go to my friends because 1. I feel like most of them don’t like me 2. I’m so sick of them trying to reason with me I’m grateful for the help but it’s the same every time it feels insincere or like they don’t even care anymore. It lowkey might be karma but yea.

Sorry for the vent I don’t even know if I’ll leave I’m literally so desperate but I don’t even care. I miss when i started this blog when I was actually having fun and stuff now it just feels like I’m working I don’t want to do that it sucks all the fun out. I never complete any writing or anything and this is why. I hate school I hate everything about it.

OAKY AGAIN SORRY FOR THE VENT IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO STUPID