#i've already discussed it with my friend and he made things worse by saying that erik puts on his helmet so charles won't find him
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retrobr · 9 months ago
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Last night I had a somewhat sad thought/idea, call it whatever you wish.
Each night, before going to sleep, Charles would find Erik using his telepathy, passing through thousands and millions of people's minds every time, just to find one specific one. He does that to make sure that he's safe and alive, because even though they're rivals after all that happened, Erik is still his old friend. He doesn't know Erik's exact whereabouts, in which country he lives, and what people he shares his life with, but at least he knows that he's still there.
Bonus detail: each night Erik actually feels someone's presence in his mind.
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mousepatta · 17 days ago
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Sharks and Minnows
What could be worse than waking up in a dangerous, magical world with no idea of how to get back home? Waking up in said world to find out that your perfectly average height apparently translates to about four inches tall in this world.
Yuu is nothing if not industrious. However, their decision to live in Octavinelle dormitory's walls may have backfired.
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Chapter 1: Unfortunate Circumstances
->
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Azul had a problem.
It had started off small. So small that he almost hadn't noticed.
Little things would go missing here and there. Nothing valuable, just a stray button or ink cartridge. Maybe a small amount of food would go unaccounted for from the kitchen. At most, it had been annoying. Azul had assumed it was simply Floyd misplacing things. But then things had taken a turn.
Suddenly, students were coming into his consultations a tad more… informed than they should have been. They would nit-pick clauses he had discussed only in private. Of course, he could “roll with the punches” as one might say, but it sure made his job harder. He had to stay on his toes when making deals with what should have been naive little first years. It was as if someone was feeding them knowledge they should not have been privy to.
Azul had already embarrassed himself by prowling around his own office, searching for some sort of hidden recording device. For how else could these people have such exact knowledge of the lounge's inner workings. Exhausted from ranting to Jade, Azul steeled himself to attempt to get help from Idia. Though they weren't exactly the best of friends, Azul would garner that he was likely one of the few people on campus who interacted with the reclusive housewarden, so gaining his favor shouldn't be too difficult.
“So, like, what d’ya want me to do about it?”, Idia stared blankly.
Azul had confided in him during a meeting at the board game club.
“It is a matter of technology, is it not? I've been unable to find any sort of recording device, but you may be able to find one with your more advanced methods, no?”
“Yikes, getting dragged out of my room again in one day sounds like a major L.”, Idia muttered to himself.
“I would not seek your assistance if this was not a serious matter. I'm sure I can offer something in exchange.”
Azul reached into his bag, pulling out a boxed figurine.
“Omg! That's totally a collector's edition doki club figurine from the fast food tie-in! How did you get your hands on that?”
“Worry less about how I acquired it and more about how you can. Just one little favor and it's all yours.”
“Geez, this guy can't say anything without sounding sus. But I guess I'm in!”
“It'll be a pleasure doing business with you.”
After these stressful few weeks, Azul's spirit finally began to lift.
Yuu rushed forward. They didn't have much time. Waking up in an unfamiliar, magical, world without any clear way to get home was stressful enough. Adding onto that, the fact that their perfectly normal height apparently translated to about four inches in this world, Yuu had been having an unpleasant experience.
In the aftermath of a stressful orientation, the headmaster had allowed Yuu to stay in Ramshackle dormitory along with their “familiar”. Though, most students would not know Yuu was even there, which they were perfectly fine with. What was not fine was the state of the dorm they had been given asylum within. It was decrepit. If they had been the appropriate size, they were sure they could pretty it up a bit, or at least clean it enough that the dust didn't irritate their eyes and nose too much. Alas, with that not being the case, Yuu had no choice but to search for alternative solutions.
The other dorms were all well-maintained. Yuu was sure that no one would even notice if they were to slip in and stay in secret. That just left them the decision of which dorm to choose. They couldn't find much information about Diasomnia, just that many strong mages were there. Maybe they would be able to sense an unwelcome presence? In the same vein, Savanaclaw housed most beastmen who might be able to sniff them out. Ignihyde was supposedly full of hermits who would stay in the dorm too often. Heartslabyul and Pomefiore had rigorous rules and standards that would make any evidence of Yuu's existence harder to ignore.
That left them with Scarabia or Octavinelle. The scale was tilted the moment the prefect discovered that Octavinelle housed a restaurant, the Mostro Lounge. Getting food would be a breeze. After thoroughly convincing Grim to give them a ride over, using the promise of free food stolen from the Mostro Lounge, Yuu got to work. They made the risky, but rewarding, move of carving out their home base in the walls of the VIP room of the lounge. It kept them far enough away from the rush of customers, but close enough to food and other supplies.
Which led them to where they were now. Yuu rushed through the walls toward a dorm room. They had taken too much food from the lounge itself lately and the Octavinelle housewarden, Azul Ashengrotto, had taken notice. An added bonus of their chosen place within the walls was that they could hear any grievances and quickly course correct. For now, they would switch to finding food within the dorm rooms for a while. Just until any suspicion died down.
If Grim hadn't gotten greedy, there wouldn't be any suspicion in the first place, Yuu thought bitterly.
Their steps were hurried, keeping in mind that students would be filing into the dorm soon. If Yuu didn't have the added responsibility of attending classes in secret despite their size, the time to forage would be plentiful. They internally cursed Dire Crowley for his borderline hazardous requirements.
Their mood lifted as they reached their favorite dorm room. A smile traced their features as they popped their head out of the secret entrance they had made through the wall. Just as expected, three different bags of chips were left open. The prefect wasn't sure what sort of person would leave so many snacks open without finishing any, but they wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth.
The dorm room was split down the middle, with one side staying tidy and the other side being a mess. Yuu would mostly ignore the cleaner side of the room as it never bore any fruits. At most, they could pick off some of a mushroom from one of the terrariums placed on the shelves, but they didn't know enough about fungi to know which were safe to eat. Accidently poisoning themself would be a pretty embarrassing way to go. They would stick to their pre-packaged goods, thank you very much.
Just as they had finished packing up a variety of chips and a bit of candy they had found on the way, they heard two sets of footsteps approaching the door. Yuu slipped down and under the bed of the messier side of the room, heading toward the safety of the wall. Before they could get there, the door opened and someone flopped onto the bed above them. Yuu jolted. The stress on the springs almost made them think the bed would collapse. The second set of footsteps calmly pulled out a desk chair.
A bag crinkled.
“Wha- Jade, ya haven't been eating my stuff have ya?”, a voice lilted.
“Wouldn't dream of it.”, a deeper voice replied.
“Well something has been. Should tell Azul to quit holin’ up in his office while we get mice out here.”
“I sincerely doubt a mouse stole two chips from you and left without a trace.”
“Well, what else could it be? Don't think anyone here would sneak in and steal from me. That's just askin’ for a squeezin’.”
“What indeed?”
Yuu had heard enough. They quickly and quietly slipped back into the walls, drowning out the rest of the conversation. Something about the tone that “Jade” had used unnerved them.
They had little time to dwell on that matter as Yuu made their way through the walls and back to their home base. As much as they appreciated the dorm they were in, the housewarden was a bit… much. He often tricked students into signing contracts, luring them in with false promises before ultimately striking. Yuu rolled their eyes at the thought. It wasn't as if he couldn't fulfill the promises he would make, he simply refused to. Taking advantage of students in exchange for “favors” that took little to no effort on his part. Yuu could understand not wanting to be constantly helping others, but if he really did have the power to help his desperate peers, why not just do it?
With these thoughts in mind, Yuu had taken to giving out their own scraps of advice. Their position gave them insider knowledge on certain terms and after hearing so many consultations, they had acquired quite the knack for finding cracks in different clauses. Knowledge in tow, Yuu would anonymously message students before and occasionally during their meetings with Azul. Though some simply dismissed their warnings, those who would heed them were ultimately able to gain more bargaining power at the very least. It may not have been foolproof, but it was the least they felt they could do.
Yuu peered out through a small hole in the bookcase. Azul seemed to be in high spirits. Likely because of some scam going well, Yuu thought bitterly. He was humming to himself, happily scrawling away on whatever paperwork needed attention. Yuu eagerly flopped into their jewelry-box-turned-bed, ready to enjoy some well-earned rest.
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skzhua · 2 years ago
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Episode two.
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MASTERLIST
pairing: XO, Kitty's Min Ho x Female Reader
genre: Fluff, angst, enemies-to-lovers, slow burn, coming-of-age.
word count: 2.4k
warnings: Painfully obvious hate-flirting, some swearing.
summary: Transferring to KISS was the last thing you had asked for and, yet, a certain tall boy made it seem both worse and better than you expected.
note: Bold - Korean, Italic - Over the phone
a/n: I changed the first part because it didn't match with the show so I recommend you go reread it if you read it in the first ten hours I posted it.
note: Bold - Korean, Italic - Over the phone
(let me know by filling the form in my bio if you want to be added to the taglist!)
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"What plan?"
You deadpanned at her. "From what I've seen last, you had something with Juliana, no?"
Her body stiffened and her hold on Dae, that was already tight enough, only got firmer. You and Yuri had some sort of forced friendship but it didn't mean you hated each other's guts. It was quite the opposite. She respected you, you respected her – it was a two-way thing. Still, she wouldn't be the kind to involve you in her problems but you weren't stupid. You knew of her and Juliana and this was beyond odd that she was so suddenly in a relationship with Dae.
"It's complicated." she said with a gulp. Seeing that you weren't convinced, she sighed. "I'll explain later, I promise."
She and Dae left and you found yourself alone so you joined Q again and were displeased to see that his friend had not left his side.
"And you're back." he sighed only to earn a glare from Q.
"Min Ho, stop that." You thanked mentally Q for informing you of his name. "Don't mind him, he's in a mood today." he tried to defend him but it clearly didn't work considering you rolled your eyes in a dramatic way.
"Do you want me to help you find your owner, little puppy? I think you're lost." he joked.
"Shove it in your ass, will you?"
Q held his hands up to separate the two of you while you were in a glaring battle. Thankfully, Kitty came back which only seemed to affect Min Ho's mood even more.
"Excuse me." she interrupted you.
"This girl treats Korean guys like Pokémon. She's trying to catch them all." Min Ho complained and you rolled your eyes again. "Not interested." he said to Kitty in a stern voice.
"Get over yourself, I'm looking for Dae." she replied harshly.
Q looked more confused than ever. "Okay, who are you?"
"I'm Kitty Song Covey."
The two men opened their mouths agape as if they suddenly had a revelation.
"You're Kitty?"
Her eyes grew bigger too and she pointed at Q. "Wait, are you Q? Track star, fellow American, heart of gold?"
He nodded happily. "Guilty as charged. I feel like we should hug right now, should we hug?
You weren't understanding a thing about what was going on but you listened nonetheless, curious on how they knew each other.
"Maybe later, I need to find Dae."
You laughed. "Okay, so you two are Dae's friends which is why she knows you and you know her?"
"You are unfortunately right, I think." Min Ho affirmed boringly and then looked at Kitty. "So you're the pen pal?"
She huffed. "If he's Q, then you must be Min Ho... Of course you are."
He shrugged as a smirk appeared on his face. You scoffed too which caught his attention.
"I told you I'm getting stalked."
"Oh, please. You just wish you were."
He came closer to you to hover over your small figure. "You're one feisty puppy, aren't you?"
Your heart skipped a beat and you looked up at him in silence, unsure of what you were supposed to say.
"Whatever. Where's Dae?" Kitty said, impatient.
You looked around with her and spotted him with Yuri as they were discussing with Jina. She thanked you and rushed to go to them.
"It's almost sad to see her go after him like that."
You grunted in frustration. "Do you ever shut up?"
Min Ho's smug face appeared once again. "Make me."
"Okay!" Q coughed awkwardly. "That's enough. How about we go meet some people, yeah?"
You heard a yelp from behind and turned around right away as soon as you recognized Kitty's voice.
"Oh, shit." you whispered to yourself and ran to her.
Before you could get to her, she slipped again and fell in the cupcakes. Dae was quick to come to her help but she brushed him off. She did, however, gladly accepted that you helped her get up before leading her outside.
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Ending the night comforting someone you barely knew as you waited for the airline to answer her call was not what you had expected. School hadn't even started and, yet, there was already more drama than you could handle.
"Are you sure you want to leave? You said you weren't here just for a boy."
She shook her head. "I can't stay here and see him walk around with her. It's too painful."
"Yuri's my friend, I can talk to her."
"Don't. You're nice but I don't want to cause trouble to the two of you."
The front door of the dorm suddenly opened and went shut seconds later. You were about to get up to see what it was until you heard a voice you'd rather not recognize.
"Spill it!" Min Ho exclaimed. "When did you get with Yuri? And when? And how far?"
"And most importantly, why?" Q added.
"Dae, you little scammer!" Min Ho teased.
You cursed at yourself mentally. You should have guessed you were in the boy dorms as soon as you saw the gym bag in the other room. And to top it all, it had to be where Q, Dae, and Minho were staying.
Kitty joined you at the door to listen but you were already in the process of packing your things up. There was no way you were going to be living with men for an entire semester, even less if it involved Min Ho who had managed to make it to your hate list on your first encounter.
"No one's going to blame you for upgrading from a pen pal to an actual girlfriend." he continued to argue with Dae.
Kitty let out a scoff and her hand went up to her mouth when she realized they must have heard.
"Marius?"
"Good going, Kitty." you whispered to her and you both went to hide under your covers.
You heard them walk in and struggle for a bit to take the blanket off Kitty. They hadn't approached your bed yet. They screamed as they finally managed to get the covers off, revealing Kitty who was screaming as loud as they were. As they all ran outside of the room, you uncovered yourself and then followed behind. They were already in shock from Kitty's presence, yours wouldn't be a surprise at that point.
"Dae's crazy ex-pen pal broke into our dorm to murder us." Min Ho breathed out.
You walked into the living room, arms crossed. "For once, you don't blame it on stalking." you said and they jumped as they saw you, Min Ho holding a laptop up in defense.
Kitty got her file and shoved it to their faces. "This is my room."
"What about you?" Q asked you as he took Kitty's document.
"Same." you shrugged and watched Min Ho put the laptop away.
"You're listed as Song Covey." he said after reading the form.
"So?" Kitty frowned.
"Song can be a guy's name. That's why they assigned you to the guy's dorm." Dae sighed.
"That explains for her but Y/N?" Min Ho asked, eyeing you up and down in disgust.
"It might be because the girl's dorms are full or something, I don't know." you responded, unsure yourself on why you were there.
He took the document himself and read it only to sighed in exasperation. "They did this on purpose! To be closer to Dae, and me."
"And just when I thought you aren't so full of yourself..." you said in a whisper.
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
He shook his head. "I told you lot, she was hitting me on the plane ride here." He turned to you. "And she hit on me earlier."
"Alright, I'm done here."
You went back to your room and shut the door close. This day was overwhelming enough, all you needed was to sleep. You were going to fix the dorm issue tomorrow.
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You woke up to Kitty opening your room's door carefully while she hung up on someone. You got up and tapped on her shoulder, making her almost scream in fear.
"Don't do that again, please." she said after catching her breath.
"You're leaving this morning?"
"Yeah..."
You nodded your head slowly. "I'm glad we met. Have a safe flight."
To your surprise, she hugged you tightly before walking around Dae, who had visibly slept at the door for the night, and went out of the dorm.
You went back to bed and scrolled through your social medias to see what was new. You came upon a video of Yuri's father who was scolding his employees. The next one was the same video but ended with lettuce emojis. You let out a laugh and opened your Kakaotalk.
Y/N: Your dad is going viral.
Yuri: I saw ㅋㅋ
Y/N: Good luck to them for fixing it all.
Yuri: Yeah, it won't be easy.
Yuri: I want to talk, by the way. About last night.
Y/N: You don't have to explain yourself. I'm happy you found someone, whoever it is.
Yuri: Thank you, that means a lot.
You were typing a reply but stopped when you heard someone knocking at your door.
"Kitty." Dae said in a pleading voice. "Me and Yuri, it's not real. It's all fake."
You gasped quietly. Although shocking, it wasn't that surprising considering it involved Yuri.
"Will you just open the door? I can explain everything, Kitty."
You grunted and shoved your pillow over your head. This whole thing had nothing to do with you and, yet, here you were.
"Begging is not a good look."
And he was awake now? Starting your day with your roommate running away, her boyfriend begging to talk with her, Min Ho mocking him... just great.
"I wasn't begging, I was just trying to get my pants." Dae said in defense.
Right, you forgot. This was originally his room.
"Listen, you squatter." Min Ho said, taking over Dae's spot as his voice seemed to be louder than it was seconds ago. "We have to get ready for the first day of school."
You didn't answer, wanting to stay in bed for a bit longer. Plus, if this meant that you were pissing Min Ho off by not opening the door, this was another reason not to do so.
"Don't make us late!" he said impatiently before pounding loudly on the door.
You saw it open by itself and self-noted to remind them that they might want to fix that. Because your bed wasn't directly in their view, they didn't notice you yet.
"And she's gone." Q sighed.
"Sweet."
"Dae, don't worry about it, we'll-"
He stopped talking when he saw that Dae left too. You groaned as you got off the bed which made them turn to face you.
"You're still here?" Min Ho asked dramatically.
"No, I left last night and what you're seeing right now is your imagination."
Q held back a laugh but Min Ho was not having it. "Whatever. I'm making coffee if you want some." he informed and went to the kitchen.
You and Q followed and you leaned on the counter. "Yes, please. I didn't know you were enough of a gentleman to offer me coffee."
He huffed. "This is called basic manners and because I'm not a monster, I could make you a cup."
"So thoughtful, Min Ho."
Q sighed. "This is painful to watch. I'm going to the bathroom real quick."
With that, he went back to his room which meant there was only you and Min Ho in the kitchen. The silence was almost unbearable but the sound of the coffee machine filled it a bit. But not enough to ease the tension.
"I hope you know I still don't want you here."
"Trust me, I don't want to be here either." you agreed.
"Good."
"Good."
And there it was again, the silence. Q joined you two and the coffee was finally ready. After serving you a cup, Min Ho sat down next to his friend and served him his.
"Have you two seen the news?" you asked and Q shook his head. "You might want to see it."
Min Ho took his laptop that he had previously used to threaten you and opened it for the three of you to watch the infamous lettuce video. You heard the front door open but you were too immersed in watching that you didn't budge.
"Dae, have you seen this video? It's kind of blowing up." Q yelled at to who you supposed was Dae.
"I bet Yuri is loving this drama." Min Ho added.
You hummed in agreement. "She is, for sure."
"I don't particularly care." you heard a voice that was too feminine to be Dae.
Turning around, you smiled. "Kitty!"
Min Ho whined in annoyance. "I thought you left."
"I did!" she nodded. "But then I decided to stay. And not that it's any of your business but this isn't all about a boy."
"Oh, sweetie." Q said as a way to comfort her.
You couldn't blame him, it did look as if she was trying to convince herself it wasn't.
"My mom went here, and, I don't know, being here makes me feel closer to her than I ever have. And-"
Her mood changed in a second and she squinted to look closer at the screen that was still playing the news.
"Dae's on TV?" she exclaimed loudly, confused.
You scooted away to leave her some space, not realizing you were almost fully leaning on Min Ho. He was about to push you away but you faces came close which cut his breath short. You saw his Adam's apple bop as he gulped in nervousness.
"... And, 'lettuce' move on." you heard Dae say which broke you out of your trance.
"Well played." Q chuckled.
"Oh my god." Kitty said out loud and pushed you away to see the screen even closer.
You fell onto Min Ho again and he rolled his eyes while helping you get off him. "Stop trying with me, little puppy."
You wanted to argue back but Kitty spoke before you could say anything. "He's faking it. That's a fake relationship!"
She took a step back and her eyes brightened as if she had discovered the biggest secret on Earth. Meanwhile, you debated whether to confirm her assumption or not. Because Dae literally said it when you woke up, that him and Yuri was a fake show.
Now, it was on you to decide what to do with this information.
taglist: @nanaspalette | @schniti-is-in-the-house | @bakugou-katsukis-wife | @soobin-chois
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kingsmoot · 10 months ago
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hi! im not sure if you’ve spoken about this before but would be so interested to hear your thoughts on the dynamic between ramsay and the original reek? like the combined matters of reek already being a serial rapist and murderer before he even meets ramsay, the abject weirdness of an adult man being best friends with a child/preteen, and the fact that ramsay names his torture victim after reek despite no indication that he ever tortured the original reek? i always felt george was hinting at some kind of cycle of abuse thing with the whole “who corrupted who” line. anyway sorry this ask is so long but i love your analysis and would really like to hear what you think!
hello 🩷❤️🖤 firstly thank you for your kind words!! i have spoken about this before, but i'm happy to speak about it again, ty for your interest! i'm honestly a little surprised this is such an underdiscussed topic in general!! but not too surprised.
in short: yes. i completely agree with you. from my reading of the text it is obvious that reek was sexually abusing ramsay. i've made a few posts about it:
1. most plainly here
2. and i also touched on it here where i talked about ramsay's mama willingly and purposefully putting him in danger
I went through asearchoficeandfire and pulled every mention of reek i, the manservant that roose gifted to ramsay, so let's go through them all together
the rest is under the cut for discussion of child abuse, endangerment, neglect, and csa, as well as rape and necrophilia
there are three "reeks" in the text. reek, the manservant that roose bolton gave to ramsay and his mother. reek, who is ramsay in disguise in winterfell. and reek, who is the tortured remains of theon greyjoy. to keep things simpler and easier to follow i am only going to call these three people reek, ramsay, and theon, ignoring who might have been called "reek" at what time.
"Lord Bolton has never acknowledged the boy, so far as I know," Ser Rodrik said. "I confess, I do not know him." "Few do," [Lady Hornwood] replied. "He lived with his mother until two years past, when young Domeric died and left Bolton without an heir. That was when he brought his bastard to the Dreadfort. The boy is a sly creature by all accounts, and he has a servant who is almost as cruel as he is. Reek, they call the man. It's said he never bathes. They hunt together, the Bastard and this Reek, and not for deer. I've heard tales, things I can scarce believe, even of a Bolton. And now that my lord husband and my sweet son have gone to the gods, the Bastard looks at my lands hungrily." Bran wanted to give the lady a hundred men to defend her rights, but Ser Rodrik only said, "He may look, but should he do more I promise you there will be dire retribution. You will be safe enough, my lady . . . though perhaps in time, when your grief is passed, you may find it prudent to wed again."
acok, bran ii
this is the first we hear of reek and ramsay, and it's notable that they've only been over at the dreadfort + its surrounding lands for two years now. we learn later in adwd that reek and ramsay have been together since ramsay was a child, but they were living in weeping water with ramsay's mother
It was a few days after Alebelly's bath that Ser Rodrik returned to Winterfell with his prisoner, a fleshy young man with fat moist lips and long hair who smelled like a privy, even worse than Alebelly had. "Reek, he's called," Hayhead said when Bran asked who it was. "I never heard his true name. He served the Bastard of Bolton and helped him murder Lady Hornwood, they say." The Bastard himself was dead, Bran learned that evening over supper. Ser Rodrik's men had caught him on Hornwood land doing something horrible (Bran wasn't quite sure what, but it seemed to be something you did without your clothes) and shot him down with arrows as he tried to ride away. They came too late for poor Lady Hornwood, though. After their wedding, the Bastard had locked her in a tower and neglected to feed her. Bran had heard men saying that when Ser Rodrik had smashed down the door he found her with her mouth all bloody and her fingers chewed off.
acok, bran v
the above is referencing ramsay, of course, disguised as reek. here we have the account of how ramsay and reek were caught on lady hornwood's lands after they had kidnapped and raped her from the stark perspective (and filtered through bran's 7-year-old perspective as well) but a little later on we hear it straight from the bastard's mouth:
"Aye, but [Ser Rodrick] thought us friends. A common mistake. When the old fool gave me his hand, I took half his arm instead. Then I let him see my face." The man put both hands to his helm and lifted it off his head, holding it in the crook of his arm. "Reek," Theon said, disquieted. How did a serving man get such fine armor? The man laughed. "The wretch is dead." He stepped closer. "The girl's fault. If she had not run so far, his horse would not have lamed, and we might have been able to flee. I gave him mine when I saw the riders from the ridge. I was done with her by then, and he liked to take his turn while they were still warm. I had to pull him off her and shove my clothes into his hands—calfskin boots and velvet doublet, silver-chased swordbelt, even my sable cloak. Ride for the Dreadfort, I told him, bring all the help you can. Take my horse, he's swifter, and here, wear the ring my father gave me, so they'll know you came from me. He'd learned better than to question me. By the time they put that arrow through his back, I'd smeared myself with the girl's filth and dressed in his rags. They might have hanged me anyway, but it was the only chance I saw." He rubbed the back of his hand across his mouth. "And now, my sweet prince, there was a woman promised me, if I brought two hundred men. Well, I brought three times as many, and no green boys nor fieldhands neither, but my father's own garrison."
acok, theon vi
ok just a quick pause i LOVE ramsay's little monologue here it's SO CRAZY GOOD it's so good it's so
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like telling theon to his face "aye, but he thought us friends. a common mistake." is CRAZY. it's so good!!!! after so many chapters of build up too the whole thing feels like being nailed down to a chair and put in thumb screw and every time there's a new bran or theon chapter they're tightened just a half-turn before this reveal where your thumbs are sliced clean off by a scimitar IT'S SO GOOD RRAUUUGHHH
sorry i got distracted. this li'l bit is interesting because it sets ramsay up as In Charge. he calls the shots. "[Reek]'d learned better than to question me," he says, and he sacrifices reek to the stark riders to save his own skin. the way ramsay tells this story sets reek up as disposable and submissive. a servant who is below ramsay's station, defers to him, gives obeisance, and gives his life for his master. (notable as well that this is not Lady Hornwood who they are raping the corpse of, but an anonymous northern girl, likely one of the smallfolk who live by and/or in the Hornwood keep)
ramsay's language here also makes it clear that this is habitual for him and reek. he likes to hunt girls, rape them, and kill them, and reek likes to fuck their corpses before they've cooled. romance. this was established somewhat back in bran ii when lady hornwood first introduced the pair, but we now have it straight from ramsay's mouth that this is their habitual game.
"I knew the first Reek. He stank, though not for want of washing. I have never known a cleaner creature, truth be told. He bathed thrice a day and wore flowers in his hair as if he were a maiden. Once, when my second wife was still alive, he was caught stealing scent from her bedchamber. I had him whipped for that, a dozen lashes. Even his blood smelled wrong. The next year he tried it again. This time he drank the perfume and almost died of it. It made no matter. The smell was something he was born with. A curse, the smallfolk said. The gods had made him stink so that men would know his soul was rotting. My old maester insisted it was a sign of sickness, yet the boy was otherwise as strong as a young bull. No one could stand to be near him, so he slept with the pigs … until the day that Ramsay's mother appeared at my gates to demand that I provide a servant for my bastard, who was growing up wild and unruly. I gave her Reek. It was meant to be amusing, but he and Ramsay became inseparable. I do wonder, though … was it Ramsay who corrupted Reek, or Reek Ramsay?" His lordship glanced at the new Reek with eyes as pale and strange as two white moons. "What was he whispering whilst he unchained you?"
adwd, reek iii
the above comes two books later, and now that we've gotten lady hornwood's perspective (and this is a perspective that comes from the general northern grapevine of people who live between winterfell and the dreadfort) and ramsay's perspective (which we will soon learn to doubt) we get roose's.
it's interesting too, i had always pictured reek as a grown adult man, but my friend @wormlips pointed out to me recently that roose does call him a "boy" in the above passage. i think i always pictured him as an older man partially since theon is transformed through his year of torture in an abandoned shipping container into an old man. i had just always made the logical leap that in addition to making theon smell terrible so that he is more similar to reek, purposefully torturing and starving him and turning him into a bent old man was also to emulate reek. to recreate him in a way. so i have always pictured him as being WAY older than ramsay, like rams is between seven and ten and reek is like... forty five. but wormie also pointed out that drinking perfume seems like a childish thing to do. i can see the sense in their reading of it! i have personally never pictured the two of them as being close in age, but rather ramsay as a child and reek as an old(er) man. i think the two incidents of reek stealing perfume might have happened when he was young but that he was an adult by the time ramsay's mother came to the dreadfort to ask for a serving man.
it's interesting also that roose implies with his question of who corrupted who that reek was not a serial rapist + murderer before he was given to ramsay. but idfk about that. the thing is that all of these people are unreliable narrators, so it's kind of a murky picture of a purposefully obscured past.
it doesn't make sense to me that the smallfolk would claim the gods cursed reek to "stink so that men would know his soul was rotting" if he wasn't already murdering and/or raping girls or defiling corpses. why would that be how they explained his smell if he was just a normal guy with a medical condition?
it's possible that roose only gave reek to ramsay and his mother because of his smell. because ramsay's mother wanted him to give them a servant to help her raise the boy so roose gave her one who smelled like an open grave being used as a latrine. but that doesn't seem like the kind of joke roose bolton would play. not to me! roose giving the troublesome mother of his rapebaby a man with a proven history of horrible violence? that seems like the kind of joke roose bolton would play. to me.
also reek and ramsay becoming "inseparable" reads as far less sinister if you picture them being the same age. i do not.
another point to reek being significantly older is that it wouldn't make sense for roose to send a child over to a woman who was asking for childcare support. even if he did, she'd send him back. he couldn't do any more work around the mill than ramsay could if they were both children, he would just be an extra mouth to feed. so even if he isn't quadrouple ramsay's age like i'm picturing him, he would definitely be older. like 16-7 at minimum i think.
to your point about cycles of violence, i would say that ramsay's entire existence as a character is about cycles of violence. the cycles are certainly cycling!!! but that's not exactly what i get from this particular snippet. i take roose's question about whether reek corrupted ramsay or ramsay reek in the same way i take his telling ramsay that his way has always been in favor of "a peaceful rule and a quiet people". he's full of shit!!!
my reading of it is that rams was obviously already a violent child. maybe he was killing animals, hurting his mother, hurting his fellow children. but he was a child. and reek was an adult man with a history of violence towards others. that violence isn't explicitly stated in the text but i think if the smallfolk were saying that his soul was rotting then it had to be pretty bad. i interpret this as reek already being a rapist and serial killer before he ever met ramsay (which is your reading too!).
"Has my bastard ever told you how I got him?" That [Theon] did know, to his relief. "Yes, my … m'lord. You met his mother whilst out riding and were smitten by her beauty." "Smitten?" Bolton laughed. "Did he use that word? Why, the boy has a singer's soul … though if you believe that song, you may well be dimmer than the first Reek. Even the riding part is wrong. I was hunting a fox along the Weeping Water when I chanced upon a mill and saw a young woman washing clothes in the stream. The old miller had gotten himself a new young wife, a girl not half his age. She was a tall, willowy creature, very healthy-looking. Long legs and small firm breasts, like two ripe plums. Pretty, in a common sort of way. The moment that I set eyes on her I wanted her. Such was my due. The maesters will tell you that King Jaehaerys abolished the lord's right to the first night to appease his shrewish queen, but where the old gods rule, old customs linger. The Umbers keep the first night too, deny it as they may. Certain of the mountain clans as well, and on Skagos … well, only heart trees ever see half of what they do on Skagos. "This miller's marriage had been performed without my leave or knowledge. The man had cheated me. So I had him hanged, and claimed my rights beneath the tree where he was swaying. If truth be told, the wench was hardly worth the rope. The fox escaped as well, and on our way back to the Dreadfort my favorite courser came up lame, so all in all it was a dismal day.
adwd, reek iii
the above always sends a chill down my spine... "a peaceful rule. a quiet people. that has always been my way. make it yours." you delusional lying bastard 🩷🩷🩷
this passage is notable as well because it shows us that rams is an unreliable narrator. it's not the first time either!!
Ramsay was clad in black and pink—black boots, black belt and scabbard, black leather jerkin over a pink velvet doublet slashed with dark red satin. In his right ear gleamed a garnet cut in the shape of a drop of blood. Yet for all the splendor of his garb, he remained an ugly man, big-boned and slope-shouldered, with a fleshiness to him that suggested that in later life he would run to fat. His skin was pink and blotchy, his nose broad, his mouth small, his hair long and dark and dry. His lips were wide and meaty, but the thing men noticed first about him were his eyes. He had his lord father's eyes—small, close-set, queerly pale. Ghost grey, some men called the shade, but in truth his eyes were all but colorless, like two chips of dirty ice. At the sight of Reek, he smiled a wet-lipped smile. "There he is. My sour old friend." To the men beside him he said, "Reek has been with me since I was a boy. My lord father gave him to me as a token of his love."
adwd, reek i
ah, but that's not true, is it, rams? your father gave him to you as a jest, to spite you and your mother. he was given to you both to harm you and it is a quirky little miracle that he ended up harming others with you instead.
rams tells himself and other stories about how he was welcomed into his father's house and beloved by him. how his mother was a great beauty who his father was in love with. and it's all lies. all dust upon the air.
i'll also note that roose describes reek as being "dim". i don't think there's much truth to that tbh. i think roose is proven time and again to view all the smallfolks as dumber than him. beneath him and mostly inhuman. this is really well defined in arya's acok chapters when she serves as his cup bearer and she is totally invisible to him.
"A fine rule, m'lord." "The woman disobeyed me, though. You see what Ramsay is. She made him, her and Reek, always whispering in his ear about his rights. He should have been content to grind corn. Does he truly think that he can ever rule the north?"
adwd, reek iii
[ALICENT HIGHTOWER VOICE] AND AEMOND... YOU KNOW WHAT AEMOND IS.
this btw is where my characterization of ramsay's mama really takes root. i think it's obvious enough what she was doing without this explicit confirmation from roose, especially with how ramsay acts and how he speaks about himself. but this is the crux of it. she had everything taken from her. her husband murdered and her raped under his still-warm corpse. and then she carried her pregnancy to term in the hopes that the gods would grant her a boy who could be given a place in the world that she never could be.
to me this is where the cycles start cycling. not with reek and ramsay, but with a desperate, violated, brutalized woman giving her son back to her rapist and insisting that he claim him. like, if she were... i'm not certain that i would call her a "Good Victim" for doing this but she could have aborted her pregnancy. tried to rebuild her life now that her husband was dead and she was physically brutalized. aboritcides are plentiful in westeros. or if she wanted to keep her pregnancy to term she could have lived the rest of her quiet life with her child in weeping waters in the shadow of the dreadfort. and she could have kept her son far from the leech lord who brutalized her.
but she didn't!!!!!!!! she shoved that baby right into the wide open razor toothed mouth of the monster who brutalized her!!! she knew exactly what kind of man lord roose bolton was and she was determined to get her child recognized by him and taken into his fold.
i love that rams is like... a personification of her all consuming rage as well as a personification of his father's brutality. it's great.
"He fights for you," Reek blurted out. "He's strong." "Bulls are strong. Bears. I have seen my bastard fight. He is not entirely to blame. Reek was his tutor, the first Reek, and Reek was never trained at arms. Ramsay is ferocious, I will grant you, but he swings that sword like a butcher hacking meat."
adwd, reek iii
further evidence of reek being significantly older than ramsay! a child would not tutor another child. further evidence also that reek was already a brutally violent man before he and rams started playing the most dangerous game in the woods. he taught ramsay how to hack people apart with a broadsword.
also calling reek ramsay's "tutor" here reinforces to me that their relationship was inappropriate. odd for a young child and his teacher to be "inseparable".
"He's not afraid of anyone, m'lord." "He should be. Fear is what keeps a man alive in this world of treachery and deceit. Even here in Barrowton the crows are circling, waiting to feast upon our flesh. The Cerwyns and the Tallharts are not to be relied on, my fat friend Lord Wyman plots betrayal, and Whoresbane … the Umbers may seem simple, but they are not without a certain low cunning. Ramsay should fear them all, as I do. The next time you see him, tell him that." "Tell him … tell him to be afraid?" Reek felt ill at the very thought of it. "M'lord, I … if I did that, he'd …" "I know." Lord Bolton sighed. "His blood is bad. He needs to be leeched. The leeches suck away the bad blood, all the rage and pain. No man can think so full of anger. Ramsay, though … his tainted blood would poison even leeches, I fear."
adwd reek iii
aaaaaaaaand back to ramsay's bad blood. "I had him whipped for that, a dozen lashes. Even his blood smelled wrong." :> where did all the bad blood come from, i wonder? his sire perhaps?
i love roose describing rams as full of anger. that's his mama's anger 🩷 calcified by roose's rejection of him and his refusal to accept this. spurred on by reek's proclivities and by reek's own rejection by his liege lord. just a horrible layer cake of brutality and violence and abuse.
that's all the quotes i have for you!!!
to me it is obvious from the above text that reek sexually abused ramsay as a child. possibly when he got older and bigger and stronger and reek was a much much older man, smaller and frailer, he really was meek and obedient to ramsay. but it didn't start out that way. his tutor would not behave with deference towards him. the man who taught him how to hack meat apart with a broadsword and how to hunt women through the woods before skinning them was not... subservient to him.
the closeness between them is suspect just because of their age difference and further suspect because of who reek is and what he does.
i also think that ramsay would never see this as sexual abuse. i think ramsay and theon have exactly the same frame of mind here where it isn't possible for them to be sexually abused or taken advantage of because they're men and that doesn't happen to men.
it's obvious that ramsay thinks of his relationship with reek fondly. fondly enough that he tells people reek was a token of his father's love. fondly enough that he creates a new reek for himself after the first one dies.
to your point about ramsay torturing theon into his reek when he never tortured reek, i do read part of that as revenge. like a sort of inversion of what was done unto him. i don't think that reek tortured ramsay the way ramsay tortures theon! but i do think he assaulted him. a major theme with ramsay is the playing of parts (a theme intensified and continued when jeyne is brought to winterfell as arya) so i see his sexual abuse and torture of theon as an inversion of what reek did to him.
i mean, i think ramsay tortures theon for other personal reasons. like resenting his beauty, his status as a lord's legitimate son, and the way he treated him in winterfell when he took it over. and just because he's a sadist who likes torturing people to get off. but also i like to think that it was an inversion of what reek did to him.
i'm unsurprised also that this isn't really talked about because the asoiaf fandom in general loves to say that the cycles are cycling but hates to admit that the evil monstrous characters who hurt people were also hurt themselves. so it's like bad fandom politics to say that ramsay bolton, who is a serial killing serial rapist, was also raped as a child. and put into situations with people he never should have been in because he was a child.
this is way too long it's way too many words it took me like the whole day to write it!!! i hope you read it to the end and don't get bored!!! thank you for your question mwah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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yeonmuse · 5 months ago
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ᥫ᭡ f!reader x yang jungwon ── 𝒢enre. Uni au. fluff, non idol enha. feats. ot7 [reqs are open] ᝰ.ᐟ 𝓁ibrary 🎧
authors 𝓃𝑜𝓉𝑒𝓈 I honestly have no idea where this came from I just thought of anti social Jungwon and Anti social reader coming together and this is where it got me. This is part of admins Enhypen university Series
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ᦓynopsis Jungwon is a film major that finds honestly complete captivated by an antisocial girl with a love for the stars and a passion for music
TAGLIST CLOSED FOR THIS SERIES
The final score
Today was the final day which Jungwon and yn would spend together working on the project together. Needless to say he wasn’t sure what would happen after this, yes the two of them had become closer but he had his doubts. Would she still want to hang out with him after tonight? He sat silently tapping his pencil against the table as the ticking of the clock continued to wind. His nerves screaming at him to for once go against his thoughts and go for what he clearly wanted.
His thoughts were interrupted as yn slipped into the room like always, she held two drinks in her hand just like the last night they worked with one another.
“It’s so cold out.” She places the drinks on the table before taking off her coat, Jungwon realized it almost immediately and he hated that he did, but she was avoiding his gaze.
“So I already recorded the tracks. Should we start by working on their placements?”
“Look at me yn.”
“Huh? What do you mean?” He caught her, she couldn’t look at him, not after last night. It would only make things worse for her, it would only solidify the way she felt for him after last night.
“You haven’t looked at me once since you came inside yn, please.” His pleading made her heart hurt her chest, she sensed a hint of hurt in his voice but she couldn’t get herself to face him. So without a second thought Jungwon took it upon himself to turn her head and make her look at him.
“Better.” Her breath caught in her throat as she was forced to now face him, unlike her he didn’t shy away from her gaze, he stared directly into her eyes.
“Um, so the soundtrack.” She clears her throat before returning her attention back to the task at hand. She remained like that with him for the rest of the night. Stealing glances at him or chasing the subject when he talked about anything other than the project at hand, they worked at it for hours until they had perfected it. Then there was nothing more to discuss once the final adjustments had been made.
“Why do I feel like you’re trying to push further and further from me no matter how much closer you try to get?” The question caught her off guard, but it wasn’t like it was something she could avoid.
“What do you mean..?”
“The entire time since the day we met we've been trying to get closer to you, Sunoo became friends with you faster than I ever could, you grew accustomed to the others in just an hour..but with me..”
“Jungwon..”
“What about me is different from them?”
“You make me feel how the stars used to make me feel..” It was clear by Jungwons expression that he was completely confused.
“When I was younger, I fell in love with stargazing. It was calming on nights where all I could do was overthink or bombard myself with useless thoughts. It became an ongoing thing, listening to music and writing beneath the stars and I felt, I felt happy..like I wasn’t alone. I could look at them and hope for things I'd never hope for on a normal day, but at some point the sky became void of them.” Jungwon had no idea where she was going with this, but everything in him was more than sure she felt the way he did.
“The way I would feel when I look at them, is how I feel with you, calm, Seen, heard, like I'm not alone. But you also make me feel things I've never in my life experienced with Jungwon. You make me nervous. I’ve never ever in my life felt like this towards anyone before because I always made sure that I was alone. With the others it's so easy…but with you, I don’t want your friendship Jungwon, I like you.”
Jungwon had no idea what to say, he was completely stuck, he had never expected for her to be sitting right here confessing to him that she liked him.
“I like you too.”
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🔖@jwonistic @jiamini @sol3chu @vixialuvs
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brsb4hls · 2 years ago
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Good Omens Spoilers:
I'm off work now and can sort my thoughts a bit.
So far I've seen only positive reactions and some posts complaining about criticism (which I have not seen in itself).
I very much feel there's something missing in the discussion.
I'm not gonna spoil people's fun and I certainly will enjoy fan stuff, but I cannot stop being pissed.
And it's not about wether Aziraphale reciprocates Crowley's feelings and if they are a canon romantic couple or not.
That's not the point. The point also isn't dolphins, it is that I feel that Gaiman perverted the original core of Good Omens.
He might have done it for angst and a dramatic build up and he might resolve it if there will be a third season (which cannot be guaranteed, so THAT ending could be what we have to live with), but whatever the reasons, he did it and it leaves a bad taste.
To me the point of Good Omens always was that heaven and hell as a strict and rigid concept were equally horrible.
The 'good place' so to say was always earth.
And being a human on earth was about being accepted with all one's quirks and also making one's own decisions.
If I remember correctly those points are mostly made by Adam (who actually is the main character of the book, it just has so many colourful supports you wouldn't notice).
So Aziraphale and Crowley fit way better on earth, because they're both too unique for a rigid corporate structure.
They already are their own little team even if Aziraphale sometimes displays a holier-than- thou attitude and needs Crowley to remind him what he would loose, if earth were gone.
So they both defy their respective bosses to keep the niche they carved.
The first season of the show manages to keep that core statement despite changing the characters up a bit.
And it ends like in the book, with Aziraphale and Crowley fighting the system and winning, being free.
And now it's all set back and actually made worse by Aziraphale willingly going back, as long as he's in charge.
In the show, Aziraphale was bullied by his superior and now takes his job. He thinks he can change the oppressive system from the inside instead of abolishing it altogether, or staying clear of it, because it is 'toxic'.
And yes, I did notice that tiny bit of blackmail from Metatron regarding Crowley, but after all that happened THAT should have given Aziraphale a clue about what he is getting into again.
He also doesn't seem to suddenly know his best friend of 6000 years anymore.
Crowley never had a problem with being a demon. He had a problem with how hell treated him.
And a problem with how heaven reacted to asking questions, which is a thing he loves, so why would he want to go back?
On earth, Crowley was completely ok with doing minor mischief and performing demonic magic.
And Aziraphale technically knows that, but he tries to drag Crowley along for purely selfish reasons. And on top he seems to think that as a demon Crowley is not good enough anymore.
And that completely goes against the point.
The point that has been made very clear before and made book and parts of the first season so great.
Gaiman let the system win.
(and pull Aziraphale back in after he successfully got out. That's like someone taking back their horrible job at the factory that pays minimum wages and pollutes the environment as long as they're forman).
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a-substantial-trash-pile · 7 months ago
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real downer mental health stuff below cut. sorry. it's been a real hard couple weeks and i need to get things out somewhere or i'll go crazy.
i just need to get my feelings written out because right now i feel like im going to explode and i can't afford therapy right now and i can't talk to any friends because i cant live with the guilt of burdening them with my problems. so this is the only way i can think of getting it out of me. but i still feel guilty even doing this so im turning reblogs off because i don't want anyone to feel like they need to provide words of comfort or anything like that. would turn off replies to this post too if i knew how to do it. i just need to get it Out.
a few weeks ago, my family had a discussion about putting our old dog down. he's deaf and blind and has dementia that's gotten much worse this year. and he isn't really "living" anymore. i'm not sure he even knows who i am anymore. and it hurts so so bad. i know it's time. but it hurts so fucking bad. i don't want to be the one to make the phone call and make the appointment and solidify the date i lose him forever, so i asked my dad if he could do it. my mom wanted to do it immediately but my dad said he would make the call after my mom's surgeries for her parkinsons that was happening this month. i know my dad doesn't want to put our dog down. the whole thing was brought up in the first place because my mom keeps bringing it up. and it makes her and my dad argue which is not what i fucking want right now. she tends to bring up the subject with my dad and i at the worst times, when im feeling especially terrible. she just had her last surgery yesterday so she brought it up again tonight. the way she brings it up has kind of really sucked for me. i was already feeling especially depressed because everything was just feeling so overwhelming today (stress from thinking about my dog and also hearing that my mom fell on her face and got hurt while i was at work). the past couple times my mom has brought up my dog with me, she's started it off by asking if i had been crying and then when i say that i was, she asks when we're putting our dog down. i don't know why she's doing it like this. i feel upset at her for doing it this way, but at the same time i feel bad for being upset at her because she has parkinson's and just had surgery. even though the surgery went well, i still feel guilty that i'm upset with her.
i couldn't give my mom a straight answer because again, i don't want to be the one to solidify the date, so i told her i'm waiting for dad to make the phone call. she said, "ok i'm going to tell dad." then i went downstairs and cried while she immediately went to tell my dad. i could hear my parents argue about it. it's not a subject my dad likes to acknowledge and my mom has been really pushy about it with him and me. i regret and feel guilty about asking my dad to make the call. i should have just sucked it up and said i would do it. i think i might have to be the one to do it. but it hurts so fucking bad.
whenever my mom talks about it with my dad, she always tries to pressure him by bringing up how sad it's making me. when she does that it feels like im being made into the main "reason" to put our dog down. that if we don't put him down as soon as possible, my mental health will keep spiraling. and yeah, im not doing great right now, but i don't want to keep hearing it brought up over and over like that. i don't want to feel like it's my fault. i know my dog needs to be put down. but i don't want to feel like it's because of me. does that make sense? is that selfish? is the amount of crying i've been doing not "normal" in this situation? it's not like i cry all day. i only do it at night and i try to hide it as best i can. i don't want my mom to see and tell me "this is why we need to put him down now." which she has done before. i don't know. it just hurts so bad.
i haven't been able to tell my mom about how she's been upsetting me. because she'll get upset about it if i do. and i feel bad for being upset in the first place. because i know in the end, these actions she's taking is because she's worried for me. she just. doesn't think things through all the time. she's always spoken before thinking. although im not sure if her parkinson's has made this habit worse. i can't remember if she's always been at this level or if this is something exacerbated by parkinson's. which makes me feel even more guilty about being upset at her. god. everything just feels fucked right now. so overwhelming. i wish i could see my therapist again, but i just can't afford that expense right now.
i've been having more nightmares. been having the stupid sleep paralysis shit. been having more frequent intrusive thoughts of driving off the bridge i go over on my commute or looking at my pills and wondering what would happen if i took everything in the bottle at once. i don't think i would ever actually act on these things, because i love my family too much to have them deal with that kind of hardship. it's just been exhausting for my brain. and some days the thoughts feel closer than others. but that's depression for you. been dealing with it for many years. this has just been one of those real bad times for it. if anyone is actually reading this, please dont worry. i know that's kind of dumb of me to say considering everything i wrote here. but really please don't worry. i just needed a place to put my thoughts and feel like i'm releasing them somehow. im still here. i've had these bad thoughts before and i'm still here. i will still be here. it'll get better. i just need to hold on again.
i just wish dogs lived longer.
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mariademetal · 1 year ago
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౨ৎ⋆ ˚。⋆ kitty itadori yuuji / gn!reader ©mariademetal 2024
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cw ... yuuji calls reader babe, blood(?) but nothing violent and no vivid description of a wound, if there's anything else lmk note ... haiii welcome to my lil established relationship yuji fic in which he is a stupid cat dad this is HEAVILYYYYY based on my experiences with kittens (every single kitten i've ever owned has shat on my bed once, as if just to get it out of their system before devoting themselves to a litter box) and the many fatal injuries i've received from them..... word count ... 3.1k
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At first, you're the one that's apprehensive about bringing the cat home.
It's a little brown thing that ambushes you at the foot of your apartment's stairs, and who was very fun playmate for the first twenty minutes it followed you around, but got to be a little more trouble than you thought it might be worth after locking into climbing you like a tree and tearing a hole in your jeans in the process. At which point, you decided that while your hangout sesh was a lot of fun, it's time for your friend to go back to its mother.
To its fortune, just as you steel your resolution to leave your new friend at the bottom of the staircase on which it first attacked you, Yuuji shows up— of course he does— and decides as soon as his eye catches the claws hanging off of your shirt that he will simply keel over and die if the two of you don't foster the kitten.
"What if her last owners neglected her?" He pleads with you, looking you with the most convincing sad brown eyes you've seen in a moment while he speaks. (All while his new best friend bites his finger like it's made out of something positively delicious.) You're in the worst place in the world for this discussion, you think, still sitting at the bottom of that damned staircase. The fact that Yuuji will have won the moment you move into your apartment with that kitten keeps you in place at the price of your pride.
"Look at how fat she is, Yuuji," you gesture to her, and you can't even remember at what point in your heated discussion it became her. "What if her owners love her dearly and are waiting for her to come home? I'm not going to... catnap her."
"What if her mother died and she's looking for a new one?" He keeps asking these stupid hypothetical, rhetorical questions that prove nothing but still annoy you to no end. Not to mention the way he's cradling her in his arms— you have no doubt that by new mother he means himself.
"We already have a kid," you grit out. By kid, you don't mean an actual child, but rather a betta fish that Inumaki dared you to buy six beers deep and who you, unfortunately, discovered you could not return the morning after, nor ever. Yuuji stepped up as his father when you proved to be a little bit too absent as a single parent to him, and he's alive and thriving to this day, albeit in a tank you doubt is quite the recommended size. "What if she eats Fish? He's my pride and joy."
At this, Yuuji stops and thinks. "Aren't Nobara and Maki looking for a cat?"
"I think so," you hum, and tentatively reach over Yuuji's lap to rub your little enemy's stomach.
"Lets just take care of her until they're ready to take her," he smiles at you, tight-lipped and hopeful. "I'll make sure she doesn't eat Fish. I'll scoop her shit and feed her too."
You take your hand back to allow another tenant to pass between you and Yuuji and lean your head against the railing with a sigh. It's a bad idea and you know it. As much as you'd love to think you and Yuuji are ready to take care of a cat, dedicate the time and care it needs to it, you just can't. But if Yuuji says he'll take care of her just for the meantime, you know he means it. "... Alright. But the second she fucks with Fish, she's gone."
As it turns out, Kitty, as you and Yuuji have intermittently named her to match with Fish, is an only slightly worse roommate than Yuuji. If you were to rank everyone in your apartment by how much you all contribute, it'd go something like this— Fish in first place, obviously, for all the joy he gives you and Yuuji, as well as causing the least mess; you in second, for feeding and raising Fish up; Yuuji in third for cooking and paying the bills; Kitty at dead last for shitting all over your comforter on the first night she stays with you and having the audacity to beg you for food come morning.
Yuuji had prepared in every way he could think of— he bought her a litterbox, plenty of food for kittens, a collar (just until Maki or Nobara take her to get chipped), and enough catnip to plant a field. And, for what it's worth, when you’d first brought her into your apartment, just before Yuuji left to buy her supplies, she was an angel. She was the calmest you'd seen her the whole evening, carefully sniffing the floor of your apartment, sneaking up behind corners, checking for any harm that might come her way. So preoccupied with discovering this new, unknown land that she doesn't even acknowledge Fish's existence. It was only after she'd settled in that he ran to get her kitten things.
Naturally, Yuuji didn't think to check if Kitty actually knows how to use the elegant litter box he'd so diligently set up for her in your bathroom, so where you were expecting to sleep in and wake up to your boyfriend peppering your face with kisses, you instead wake up at the asscrack of dawn to the feeling of him jerking your blanket off of you (and the rest of your bed, you suppose), Kitty watching him from the floor with what you can only describe as morbid curiosity.
"Yuuji, what...?" You croak out, wiping the sleep from your eyes.
Then, the smell hits you, and you're confident you're not falling back asleep.
While Yuuji washes your blanket and lectures Kitty on the proper, sanitary way to relieve herself, you sprinkle some food in Fish's tank.
You stare down Kitty, who, in Yuuji's temporary absence, has taken to frolicking around your flat, as if she isn't a criminal, as if she didn't ruin your favorite duvet, and with a glare that softens by the second, you scoop out a can of cat food into a bowl and put it on the floor for her, despite the fact that Yuuji swore he’d take care of feeding her.
For what it's worth, you have to appreciate that, at the very least, she hasn't so much as glanced in Fish's direction. Despite how vehemently you're denying it at the moment, Kitty is, in fact, tearing and clawing and shitting her way into your heart— but if she does come to stay with you for any extended period of time, you'd rather it be one in which you don't have to constantly move Fish further and further away from her reach in order to keep him safe.
Fish, your first and beloved son— an accident, sure, but the happiest you've made in your life. There have been nights where you have been one dry heave away from throwing up your stomach in its entirety, and the only thing that could get you to stand up and drink some water was Fish, blub-blub-blubbing in his own, urging you with bulbous eyes to take care of yourself (because if you don't, you can't take care of him).
He's a selfish child, but all children are, you suppose. It’s their right.
Kitty finishes her food with a satiated meow and barely makes the three-foot journey to your coffee table before dropping down onto her side and passing out. It's an adorable sight, obviously, but one that also reminds you that that could've been you this morning if only she hadn't emptied her bowels onto your blanket.
Yuuji comes back to your apartment, empty-handed and head hung low, and you already know what he’s going to tell you; “Your blanket didn’t make it, babe.”
All you can do is sigh and throw your arms up. “I’ll pick up another one after work.”
Thankfully, after that fateful morning, Kitty didn’t have many other shit-related accidents. It was incredible, really, how easily she managed to fit into your life, how easily she forced you to carve time out of your day to spend with her instead— she sleeps on your couch since you tragically banned her from your bedroom, wakes you up like an alarm clock, consistently, to give her breakfast, and lazes around your apartment in tandem with you and Yuuji scurrying around to get ready for your respective days. You have class in the morning, he has work, and you always come come back just in time to deliver Kitty and Fish’s lunch. You’ve also found that Kitty has a taste in television— she screams at you whenever you put on Rupaul’s Drag Race, out of excitement or prejudice you can’t quite find out, and curls up into a ball in the crook of your elbow whenever you watch Seinfeld. Then, Yuuji comes back from work and if you don’t have plans, the four of you eat dinner together like a bonafide family.
Tonight, you don’t have plans, but Nobara, who has been promising to call you about Kitty for the past month you’ve had her has finally caught you on your phone.
“Of course I want her,” she insists, and you can see her bob swaying along with her head as she jerks it around in your mind's eye. (You love her dearly.) “It’s just… not a great time for Maki and I.”
Maki and I seems to be her favorite thing to say nowadays— you don’t think you’ve seen one without the other in some months. “That’s fine, but me and Yuuji can’t foster her forever, you know,” At the sound of his name, Yuuji whips his head around to see what you’re doing. Once he clocks who you're talking to, he mouths to you to tell Nobara he says hi. “Yuuji says hi, by the way.”
“Yeah, tell him I say hi too,” Nobara sighs. “We’re moving into Maki’s folks’ place, and I don’t know how they feel about cats and stuff.”
“Maki’s folks’ place is so big I doubt they’ll ever even see her.”
"I'm sorry, but can you just keep her until we're settled in?" Nobara asks with a politeness that's very out of character for her. Then again, if you had to live within a mile of the Zen'in compound, you'd be worn out, too.
It must be a sign from God, from Buddha, from the universe, or maybe just fate that before you have the opportunity to mumble out an uncertain I don't know to Nobara, Kitty wraps herself around your calf. She's gotten so big, you think to yourself— it feels like just yesterday she was small enough to fit in your shoe, but over the month you've fed her and scooped her shit, she's become big enough to play with your shoes.
"Yeah, of course," you splutter out. You press your phone against your shoulder and lean down to pick Kitty up while Nobara chatters away in your ear about gratitude and just hum when she asks you this or that. For a moment, just a moment, you wonder if you should be selfish and keep Kitty for yourself. Then you reprimand yourself, because she's still, for all intents and purposes, Maki and Nobara's cat.
Still, as you come to terms with the fact that Kitty's stay in your apartment will certainly be longer than you originally planned, it seems Kitty comes to the same realization— you and Yuuji discover that she's pointedly decided to make herself entirely at home. She was never well behaved, not really, what with the way she'd pounce on Yuuji whenever he fell asleep on the couch, or the way she'd dig her nails into your thighs whenever your petting skills failed to meet her standards, but it seemed that you, at the very least, had an understanding when it came to respecting the space you're all sharing— your apartment. She didn't scratch your couch, didn't spray litter all over your bathroom, and seemed to ignore fish in his entirety.
Now, though, she's picked up possibly the worst hobby of all— knocking shit off of other shit. Pens off of your desk, detergent off of your washing machine, cups off of your fucking kitchen counter. Yuuji, guilty for anything and everything he is physically capable of being guilty for, has cleaned up after her with a vigilance that you feel genuinely bad about. Unfortunately, he doesn't do it as carefully as you wish, which is why you're picking glass out of his hand with a tweezer at one in the morning after he stumbled out of your room to find what you and him had neglected to put away (what Kitty had managed to knock off of a counter) this time and found out the hard way. By tripping on the culprit in the darkness and falling hands-first onto the scene of the crime.
"Are you sure you can go to work tomorrow?" You ask, voice soft, and Yuuji, who has been smiling since he woke you up with a yelp, finally falters.
"I think I'll be alright," he murmurs back. "Nanami won't be happy, but..."
"When is he ever?" You snort.
"He likes Kitty, too."
"You've shown him pictures of her?"
"Of course! I've shown pictures of her to everyone in the department," he grins, and you can picture him, heavy in his uniform, lifting his phone up to his stoic boss' face with a picture of Kitty, asking Isn't she cute? Then him adjusting his glasses before nodding, Yes, Itadori, she's very cute.
You suppose that's the effect Kitty has on people. Yuuji, too.
He's sitting on the edge of the tub, you're sitting on the toilet seat, paper plate balanced on the sink beside you to drop the fragments of glass onto, Kitty passing and curling around your and Yuuji's feet. It feels odd to say it, but he got off lucky in this situation— only a few pieces of glass burrowed themselves deep enough into his skin to bleed, and the rest are just stuck on the surface. Still, you're pretty confident Yuuji's in a lot more pain than he's letting on.
"Really, Yuuji," you huff, "I think you should stay home tomorrow. Just so the swelling goes down and it'll be less painful the day after."
"It doesn't hurt," he starts speaking with his whole chest, but once he clocks the look you're giving him of complete and utter disbelief, his confidence wanes. "... that much."
"I know you're worried about money, but I'm worried about you," you start, and try not to wince with him after pulling out a particularly deep shard of glass. "And besides, if this gets worse because you went back to work too early, we'll have to pay for that, too."
He hums. "I guess so."
You wrap his hand up diligently, pepper his face with kisses, and shoo him away to your bedroom so you can pick up all the glass on the floor that didn't end up on that paper plate. He calls in sick.
You get through your classes like a zombie being pulled along campus by a leash. As it turns out, staying up until the early morning making absolutely sure that there wasn't any glass left on your floor did not prepare you for success when it was time to leave. Still, Yuuji solemnly swore to spend his day focused entirely on healing, so you achieved one little victory, if nothing else.
When you get home, before you can even grasp the doorknob, you hear Kitty yapping away, Yuuji sniffling, and something being shuffled around your living room. You don't know quite what you're afraid of— an intruder, Kitty growing to the size of King Kong, or Yuuji having shrunk of Kitty's height, but after peeking your head into the door, you can confidently say that it is none of the above. You do, however, see the assortment of Kitty's things gathered right by the door.
You step into your apartment, kick your shoes off, and greet Kitty as she practically jumps into your arms.
"Yuuji?" You call out to him, and realize he's in the bathroom, probably figuring out what the best way to remove Kitty's litter box would be. "What're you doing?"
He walks out of the bathroom, eyes red, bandage on his hand freshly, but messily changed, and his head hung low. "We have to give Kitty up," he says, and you immediately clutch her tighter in your arms.
"What're you talking about?"
He just gestures to where Fish is— rather, where fish should be. His tank isn't just empty, it's gone. You realize what happened.
"Did she eat Fish?" You ask. Your voice is calmer than you really are, but you don't want Yuuji to think you're mad at him for Kitty coincidentally killing Fish the one day he happened to stay home.
"No," he insists, and points to a red Solo cup he's placed on top of your bookshelf. "He's there. She... knocked his tank over. I saved him before he could die, but..."
You look down at Kitty, who is similarly looking up at you— it's like she knows what she did, like she knows exactly what your one condition to let her stay is, like she's pushing the rules just to see what you'll let her get away with before kicking her out. But Fish is not dead, albeit traumatized and certainly not thriving in his temporary home. You realize that you think you'd forgive Kitty if she clawed your eye out. You've been denying your truth— denying that you love Kitty like she's yours, because she is— for far too long.
"I-I remember what you said about only fostering her if she doesn't mess with Fish, and I agreed, so—"
"I don't want to get rid of her," you interrupt Yuuji, and his expression goes from distraught to severely confused.
"No," he insists. At first, you were the one who was apprehensive about keeping Kitty. Now, the roles have been reversed. "She messed with Fish. I get it."
"Yuuji," you say, softer, and walk towards him. You look at his hand and realize he must've worked so hard on his day off, to clean up the glass of Fish's tank, to clean up the water, the decorations, the plants, and how scared he must've been that Fish would die. How scared he must've been that you'd be mad at him. You love him too much for that. "We're not getting rid of Kitty."
"We're not?"
"Of course not. Do you want to?"
"Of course not!" He huffs, and makes a face at Kitty that she must not like, because she takes a swipe at him from all the way in the crook of your elbow.
"So... do you want to tell Nobara?"
"Hard pass."
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chaifootsteps · 2 months ago
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Hey. SatansBoot here. People have actively thought I was pleasant to make it clear I am not, but that's not the point. I making this post to speak on a platform to try and explain my thoughts on this, but I want to say it to a platform that has reach.
As pointed out in a thread. I have noticed the A-Loggy nature of your detractors (For those of you not in the know. Anthony Loggato was a HARD TIME Chris Chan critic that took things WAYYY too far.) and most of who criticize or go to extreme lengths to constantly A-Log you, are people who share the same traits as you (Trans, Furry, Critical...). A-Loggers tend to try and justify their traits they share with the A-Loggee by trying to remain on top.
When in reality most of them are just people who rehash the same allegations that were made by the Stans to harass you. There's people already trying to A-Log my friend. And I already made my stance on a deactivated post.
If you think that Spark is me. And this goes for ANYONE else here, then you got the wrong guy. Spark gave you literally everything. Proof stating he's too poor at OSPEC. And if your only proof is because he reblogged a Chai post and liked Cell like I do. Then you're extremely dumb.
In fact most of the leaks are discussed on 4Chan originally (the leak site originated from there. You can say 4Chan is WORSE then KFs). And crosses over to KiwiFarms.
Then I have to preface. People, do not make posts about people in the Hazbin community anymore. Like random citizens. This is literally shit touching and ridiculously stupid. You are intentionally causing issues for this community regardless of intentions and you've been told for ages by not just others. But we're hinted at.
The reason for this criticalcrusherbot is because people wouldn't stop tipping the very community you criticize off. The point of it is, is to not commentate on every little thing that the community does. This doesn't go for you Chai. It goes for people who actively complain about a Stans behavior then get upset when a Stan sends them an inbox.
Now, im not gonna sit here and moralfrag because ik that isn't going to do shit but if you pride yourself as being very heckin' wholesome to everyone. Then you should at least not make alts and harass people by using throwaways with evidence that literally can match as someone else.
This community from start to finish became a mirror of the community they criticize which literally is now considered a sub-community of its own.
Now. Thanks for hearing me rant. I'm tired of people trying to slander my friend just because he said something nobody liked when someone cries ableism and got mad at you for considering Viv might had NPD (if I'm wrong) to calling her a narcissist.
When the same person who called you ableist called my friend ableist, but also called him an apath. You know, the same exact word to use against someone with Autism and if you know, people with Autism has hard times controlling emotions and that's truly if people think saying words that are tied to a diagnosis is ableism then what they did was ableism. But of course this is Tumblr they don't count their own transgressions against an evil ableist cuntbag.
I'm gonna say this once and done. If you all have a problem with someone. Handle it. Most of the issues I've seen are adults literally asking for this to be handled privately. (As spark said) And the other party refusing and airing it out. This community is spawning bullies. And it's ridiculous. Thanks for giving me a chance to speak about this BS Chai. This is my final response because being on Tumblr enough is to make me annoyed.
-SatansBoot
No worries at all. This was an important read, and I appreciate it.
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I feel bad for Starlo. (pt. 2)
Had they just let him get Clover the badge (and literally finish the best day of his life since, again, Clover's gotta go) and then all sat down to chat, everything would have been solved in minutes. Because clearly Starlo's main motivation is making sure other people are happy, right? If they tell him they're not happy, he'd sure as heck care about that. Just look at how he tells the group to have fun with Clover:
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btw, this is a human they SHOULD be excited to talk to more since well... they're a human. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity, and they are SUPPOSED to be into the western culture almost as much as Star, or at least that's what Star thought. More on this later
But no, gotta act jealous instead, call Starlo's training lackluster...
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Then you make a better one, Ed, instead of complaining, Star's mind was too occupied with everything, as it always is. The town needs to be led by someone every day after all. It's all harder than it looks, you've gotta focus on schedules, new ideas, and most importantly radiating positive energy even in the worst of times
...say he's been throwing them around for human business...
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huh Moray?? He didn't force you to do anything, you all just went with it. If you hated the training, y'all never said it. Ed also says how he basically doesn't want to participate in the trolley problem which I found sorta.. weird. I mean, it's not very likely that in all the years they've spent roleplaying here, they've never done this before. And even if they hadn't, it really is logical to assume Ed didn't really mean he was terrified and was just acting to make the scene more "dramatic" The five of them ARE sort of actors anyway (why would he be scared tho? it's not a real train that's coming, no real danger here, just harmless fun)
... and apparently call him a meanie and a big-headed sheriff:
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HOW is he a meanie Mooch?? How??? He was just trying to be helpful and got too into everything. It's not the same as being mean on purpose. And even if he DID act prouder than usual, he honestly had every right to do it. After everything he's tried to do for the underground, his friends and family, he had every right to lift himself up. All you guys ever did was tag along with him everywhere apparently, never having to worry about anything but your own hobbies, had a secure AND fun job thanks to your boss, a place to live, nap times, PLUS Star was always a nice leader (Ed himself admits this; from my previous blog). How do I know he was nice? Aside from signs in the game, the gang only argued over trivial matters (IDK what exactly but Dina said this)
And Ace... wdym you're following them??
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Why??? Star literally praised you and thanked you! What the heck?? Yeah life dealth him a bad hand but you're not doing anything about this situation aside from leaving.
I love all four of them, but honestly, It's not like Star ditched any of you, he didn't ever act angry (besides when Ed insulted his mission, which IS frustrating because: 1) he tried his best to make it enjoyable for everyone 2) this comment Ed made contradicts everything Starlo wanted to feel that day: genuinely proud, happy, useful, important. He wanted to enjoy himself as much as possible and bring as much joy to others as he could. And he was right to want that... especially after all he's already done. Or tried to do. Even though he's too fiery, too passionate, *too much,* why didn't anyone let him know this? Why didn't they tell him he's NOT been making anyone happy, aside from the tourists? Why keep lying to him until his breaking point?
Better explained down here during a discussion in the messages here on tumblr in case ya'll have the patience to read it ↓
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Just... After thinking things through, I've started seeing things from a different pov. Yeah, the Four apologise to Clover in neutral, but Starlo STILL has to be the one to come to THEM for forgiveness. Forgiveness for what exactly? What did he do that was worse than what YOU guys did to HIM? (you too Ceroba, especially you, and I'll talk about this VERY soon, in a few days)
Forgetting to tie them off the rails (Ceroba forgot too) because he was too excited to well... feel like a somebody for the first time, like a real sheriff with a real deputy? Putting his needs and feelings first for once instead of walking outside his house at night and whispering to himself and thinking about every single problem he has on his plate? (I think it isn't the sheriff stuff he thinks about) Thinking he was doing the right thing by doing what he thought would be fun for everyone? Being kind to Clover? Not ditching his posse and just... idk, not running off to have an imaginary adventure with the human kid, with just the two of them? What the heck, guys.
Now, I'd understand if he'd been saying stuff like "Alright y'all, you better listen to everything I say, you understand!? Clover is the greatest thing since sliced bread, while all of you all nothing but a drag! Tch. Losers." Or "If you don't do this and that, you're fired for good! Clover will replace you! You're all lame anyway!" Or "Clover, get over here and join me on this and that! Right. NOW."
Starlo literally never said something even CLOSE to this. Only after Ed left did he let him and everyone else go, then blurted out "I was considering firing y'all anyway!" Honestly what I know about Star is that he's fiery and passionate and just snapped because he didn't understand why they left. He had done everything right.. right? He couldn't, no, wouldn't comprehend that his whole life in the Wild East has been a big fat lie. It hurt emotionally and his coping mechanism were always distractions. So he refused to see what he had (accidentally) caused.
In short, what bothers me is that all blame is put on Starlo and he's the only one who has to say sorry when he genuinely didn't know any better. Some folks just aren't introspective enough to notice people's true feelings and Star's one of them. And even if he's good at that, he's been so foused on this whole Wild East thing to think about that too, on top of everything.
He literally had to just stare off into the distance and rethink all his life choices that led him to this point (based on his letter), when instead he could have been a lone entertainer from the start. I mean, he carried all the comedy and charm on his own anyway (imo). He'd get to live his passion, plus entertain the tourists, plus boost his own confidence, PLUS none of his friends would be stuck at a job they hate! PLUS Ceroba, while still staying at Star's, could have gotten a better night's sleep with only the two of them being roommates! It would have been a win win win win win kinda situation if only they hadn't been lying to him for such a long time and just spoke up openly. Simple as that!
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kurczeno · 8 months ago
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ok so a little rant about DA:V, because I feel like it needs to be said. First a disclaimer: if you are hyped, thats good for you, really. Enjoying the final product is absolutely fine. However, I've seen SO MANY people, especially here on tumblr, but also on tiktok and reddit acting as if any criticism of the game is just people being mean haters or homophobic.
And don't get me wrong - there are probably people taking things too far, just for the sake of it. There are also people mad about the wokeness - though as a person that is very interested in the topic, I've seen only one? discussion about this matter and it wasn't even made by people that like the series, they just wanted to complain about wokeness in games, etc.. But I'm not saying these people don't exist, because I haven't seen them.
However I am seeing so many valid criticism of the game being discredited for no reason and I feel like there is at least one thing that needs to be said.
I played Origins over 20 times. DA2 and DA:I - also more than once, but I didn't count it. I loved all of them - even the Inquisition, despite its many flaws. But it's not a post about them - the thing is, I am a fan of a series. I've been since I was little and later I got that stupid hyperfixation. I was extremely excited about the game, despite SO MANY red flags - I'd say it's still Dragon Age and I'm sure it won't be that bad.
But at this point even I can't cope that hard.
First of all - it's barely Dragon Age at this point. I just want you to remmeber that most of the staff that was working on the first three games got fired or resigned themselves. The LEAD WRITER himself, David Gaider (he's incredible btw, go follow him on twitter and play stray gods!!!) has been trashing Bioware on TT for years and he's been there for 12 years. He tried to highlight just how badly the company treats its workers - and it's not only Bioware, it's gamedev in general. I have many friends that work in gamedev and whenever we talk about situations like this their reaction is "yeah, but thats what happens in gamedev every half a year". You know, it's so bad, we just treat it as a standard. Why am I bringing all this up? Because I think that countering every argument with "you haven't played the game yet" or, even worse "people are only complaining because woke" is just buying into their narrative, taking the responsibility from them. When the truth is that every single teaser looks, to say the least, outdated. The graphics are very, very bad, the designs are mid at best (I'd single out Neve and technically? Emmerich, but he looks horrible because of the graphics, so...), the reps show that they know little about Dragon Age (I'm in love with that one recording in which they collectively barely remember Zevran. The companion in the most beloved game. The guy that is basically the only source of info we get about the Crows. The Crows that are a fraction in their game???), they have already stated that your choices don't matter. I can elaborate on each of these, but the post is already to long and my point is different - don't excuse Bioware. And I'm sorry, but "play the game first" shouldn't be the argument here, because the things that should be good, regardless of the game itself fail - I'm sorry, but this isn't an indie game. It's made by a huge company, with loads of money after two commercial flops. I know some of you (including me!) are nostalgic towards Bioware, because of their games and what they meant back in the day, really. But at the end of the day, the games were made by people and Bioware is just a company. A big corporation, that just wants to make money, has a long history of mistreating their employees and has delivered the worst teasers I've seen in a long time.
TLDR: I'm not trying to tell you, you are wrong to be excited. I'm just kindly asking you to stop coming to Bioware's defense at all costs, because they don't deserve it.
(also I know David himself has reacted to the teasers and reviewed them in a positive way but I am talking mostly about the things that I blame on higherups. However I personally think that Gaider, as someone who's worked in the industry knows that there are many people there that ARE actually passionate about the product. Not the reps, please, they are embarassing, but the animators, writers, etc. And trashing their work as a lead writer of the first games would be a little too much, even if the final thing is not their fault. They don't need any more shit)
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nqmonarch · 1 year ago
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This is more of a personal piece, but I'm deciding to publish it on the off chance anyone else has similar thoughts and a similar experience to mine and if it may help them. I think even if you already know something it can be helpful to hear it again from someone else.
What's in the CWs doesn't happen between the reader and character but is rather discussed as something that happened in the past.
That being said this gets into some really sensitive stuff so if you don't feel comfortable with the Content Warnings (CWs) then please don't read.
TW and CW: Grooming
"I've always been a fool," You admitted the sun had long since set and the stars were nowhere to be found.
Jing Yuan was on the quieter side tonight, his arm comfortingly wrapped around your body as you leaned into him. At least you weren't alone. With your head pressed against his chest, silk shirt so thin you could feel the heat radiating off him, you finally felt somewhat at peace. At least physically, but your mind was at war with itself.
"We all have moments of foolishness," His voice was soft and wistful. A far cry from the general who commanded respect, he'd changed into the vulnerable old soul he was who had been hurt time and time again.
You frowned feeling your throat crack as you held back tears, your face felt like it was on fire. You'd come to hate that feeling, even if the warmth in your face was from getting flustered you still hated it-- hated it all. From the shivers you got from eye contact to the butterflies in your stomach that made you feel like you were going to be sick. It was atrocious.
Even now when you were with someone you could only dream of it you hated the feeling of being in love. "It was a moment, it was close to two years. At that point it's just plain stupidity isn't it?"
You didn't want to meet his eyes, you didn't want to see how he was looking at you. Was it pity? He knew what you'd gone through. Disappointment? Was he upset that the person he'd begun to date had failed to meet his every expectation once he got into a relationship? Or maybe it was adoration or hatred? You weren't sure which of those two would be worse.
"Y/N," Jing Yuan's voice was so soft, it was too kind, you didn't deserve to hear it, "It wasn't your fault." His hand moved up from your shoulder, moving atop your head his thumb making soothing circular motions.
You let out a noise similar to that of when a cat's when their tail is stepped on, "I know," you groaned out feeling miserable. Your eyes began to blur as tears gathered but you didn't let them fall. "But... I-- I always thought it was my fault. Even after it all I was still friends with them. I-- they were one of the few people I trusted. How could I do that to myself?"
Jing Yuan moved to meet your eyes. Rather than moving your chin or head, he scooted over so he was sitting in front of you. His golden eyes were the last thing some mara struck saw, in a strange way you hoped they would be the last thing you saw too. You wanted to be with him until you couldn't anymore. But how could you when you couldn't accept him loving you?
"Fool," It was something you wouldn't have expected Jing Yuan calling you. You'd called yourself it earlier in such a derogatory manner that hearing Jing Yuan say it with such affection gave you whiplash and you couldn't help but begin to sob.
Loud, ugly sobs that left your face a horrid red and hurt your throat. You cried tears which felt like hot acid burning you and left you scarred. "Go ahead," his voice was comforting, "cry it all out." His hands rested on your shoulders, keeping you steady. He was an anchor, not just for you but for the whole Xianzhou Luofu. You didn't deserve--
His fingers tapped on your forehead and you stared at him blinking the tears out of your eyes, "Don't overthink it. It doesn't matter if you were a guy and they were a girl, or vice versa, or if you were both the same gender. It doesn't matter how long it lasted or what they were going through."
You were ready to retort with the last one, they weren't in the right state of mind it wasn't their fault, "But--"
"No justifying it," Jing Yuan said sternly tapping your forehead, "If someone did something similar to Yanqing how would you feel?"
Horror echoed through your body, resounding and amplifying as it traveled from your limbs which all tensed up to your face which began to tremble. Yanqing was like a son to you, a very foolish one, but a son nonetheless. One who always tried to show off and ran to you the very few times he upset Jing Yuan, although the only sign Jing Yuan was upset was the slight disappointment and much larger worry in his eyes.
"I'd be outraged," You muttered, sniffling a bit and Jing Yuan used his free hand to wipe off your cheek. The streams of your tears were beginning to sink deep into your skin and stain, but he removed them like it was nothing.
He smiled at you, it wasn't lazy nor mischievous, instead it was full of comfort, "You were, and still are, a wonderful person. One who maybe cares too much for their own good." that was rich coming from the person who stayed strong amidst what had happened to his friends and taken up the role of leadership.
Jing Yuan tapped your forehead again as he noticed your attention beginning to wander. "You, were unfortunately taken advantage of, and it's not your fault. No matter what you say to justify the other person's actions. They still committed those actions. And you were young and impressionable, and at the age they were, they knew better than to do what they did. But they did it anyway," He paused looking out at the sky. Your gaze didn't follow his, instead it remained on his forlorn face.
Jing Yuan continued, "You and I are very different people," that was obvious to say the least, "and even still we both try to grab onto the past. At points, even looking for things that aren't there." Jing Yuan had been guilty of it with his past friends, and you made up countless excuses to say that everything that had happened was okay. But it wasn't. And you weren't okay.
Your eyes remained puffy and your hands dug into Jing Yuan's shoulder, clutching tightly as if you were afraid he'd disappear the moment you let go, but not tightly enough to hurt. Never tightly enough to hurt. The man in front of you was someone you'd only dreamed of being with. And yet when he was with you, you couldn't accept it.
"I'm scared," You whispered. You weren't sure exactly of what. You wouldn't let what happened in the past happen again, you wouldn't let yourself be lead around by a string willful to the whims of someone who you'd been taught to idolize. But you were fucking afraid. How could you ever trust anyone again after such a horrific ordeal that imprinted itself in your mind to the point it plagued your thoughts at night?
Jing Yuan looked back at you, hair resting elegantly alongside his face and you resisted the urge to dive into it, hide your face, and just disappear altogether. "I am as well, albeit for different reasons," He moved his hand onto your hand which was clutching his shoulder, "but we can't let fear hold us back forever." You had to move forward, both of you. It was the only way. The only way to feel like yourself again.
It would surely be difficult, and painful in some aspects. But right now you lived torn between the past and the present. Mind brutally split apart, never fully there. You had to keep trying. "I'm so lucky to have you." Your voice was hoarse and each word hurt to say.
Jing Yuan's eyebrows raised in slightly surprise, and shook his head lightly, "No, both of us are lucky that fate had us meet."
"Do you really believe in fate?" You asked, staring up at the sky.
In the corner of your eye you could see Jing Yuan smile, his usual carefree one, and let out a hum, "Maybe. If fate were to exist, do you think our actions would carry less weight?"
"They're still our actions," You answered nondescriptly. Then, suddenly, you saw a singular star in the sky.
You would continue to try, if only for the star and Jing Yuan. And of course you'd continue to try for yourself. How could you not after all you'd been through?
Jing Yuan is a very large comfort character for me. Uh idk how exactly it happened he just looks really fluffy and comforting. But yeah, this whole incident has been on my mind for a while and it's like super distracting like I'm trying to be a productive member of society and then BAM lol. Or like I'm trying to just be happy and then something super small triggers me.
So uh I decided to try writing a lil comfort fic with our man, the legend himself Jing Yuan. In which I basically state what I know (Jing Yuan) vs how I feel which is the reader's thought process kinda. And then whenever I feel like shit I'ma come back to this and use it as an anchor when bad thoughts grab a hold of me.
Wasn't sure if I was gonna publish this but here I am and uh if this ends up bringing comfort to anyone else, really happy to hear that and I hope it can become your anchor too :) we all need a Jing Yuan in our lives both to comfort and be comforted by and just uh to be with
Anyway I yapped a lot at the end sorry, gonna go cry now. Hope you guys have a great day or night :)
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aladaylessecondblog · 4 months ago
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Faal Hah Wuld, pt. 22
The Son of the Void came first to KYNRT, and breathed for the first time the open air. Thus did he understand freedom.
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Sigurd. My friend, my savior, my brother-in-arms--
One might suggest that we I you made a critical mistake in sending me along with the Dragonborn. This should never have happened
You ASS, do you not know what you've put before me?
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The paper was crumpled the instant Sadrith had finished reading that bit.
"What do you mean by that?" she asked.
Torovan tossed the paper into the fire, and whipped around to face her.
They were currently making a brief camp somewhere north of Largashbur, with the intent of a full sleep once they reached Riften. Jarla and Snow were tired, and happily nibbling at grass nearby.
"I can pretend I never saw it," she said quickly afterwards, then thinking, I'll likely forget it soon anyway.
Torovan had been...off kilter since their stop at the Hot Springs. That stoic wall was still there, but thinner than it had been before...at least, she thought so. She kept trying to shove the thought back - clearly she had been suffering a cold bed too long if she was reacting this way to him. And when that consideration would come she'd be forced to think - don't you want more from him too? A few moments wrapped up in those strong arms, like it had been back at Helgen.
My guardian, again...
But no, she was the dragonborn, she was not guarded. She was the one meant to guard everyone else, thanks to Akatosh's whims.
"No, it's fine," Torovan said, breaking her out of her flower-chained thoughts. "Because it ties into what we still need to discuss."
It had been more than a day. It must be something, she thought, for him to delay it.
"Well, talk." She shifted in place. "You keep saying it's important and then won't speak of it again."
"What do you know," Torovan started, more hesitant with every word, "Of Shezarrines?"
"Shezarrines?" Sadrith huffed a little. "The khajiit caravan I grew up with told me of Lorkhaj being cursed to wander Nirn...and then as I got older there were books about Pelinal, and someone I can't remember said something about Tiber Septim being Shezarrine..."
Torovan snorted.
"He is not a subject I wish to discuss." He paused. "I have made a study of...Lorkhan and his shezarrines. And from what you have mentioned, what you have seen...it leads me to believe that you are one as well."
Sadrith shrugged. "I've heard people say Shezarrines are heroes who come into the world 'in times of great need' and...I think I've already managed that great need."
"You're getting ahead of me."
"Sorry." She looked away, and then back at the fire. "I tend to do that."
"So I've noticed." There was a pause. "If your job was done then I don't think you'd be dreaming as you have been..."
"They're just dreams." It was meant to be flippant, even though she knew damn well it was turning into more than that. A hope, in a way. "Even if they're not, what's worse than Alduin? Whatever comes, I can defeat it."
"They are not just dreams," he insisted again, "And the presence of Dagoth Ur is--you should treat it more seriously than you are."
"I killed a dragon god...thing," Sadrith petered out, "Even if Dagoth Ur stepped before me - I could kill him as easily as I did Alduin."
His head tilted, and in the one eye she saw utter exasperation.
"Besides, the heart of Lorkhan's gone," she added, hoping to banish it.
There was a pause.
"And suppose, just suppose, that the Heart of Lorkhan beats in your chest? That the blood of this missing god runs through your veins?"
"Then it's my heart, not his. What do you expect of me?"
"I expect you to take the idea more seriously."
"I take it perfectly seriously." Sadrith sipped at her mead. "If an enemy appears I strike him down. If I don't know how, I find out how and then do it. I already have enough to worry about without anxiety over things that might not actually happen."
She worried about things like that too...but he didn't know how to do that.
"Then why--" Torovan didn't huff, but he seemed confused, "--why do you persist in acting as though these threats mean nothing? Are you not afraid of death? Were you not afraid that day at Helgen when you were soaked from both rain and blood?"
"Maybe a little, but...given who I am...I expected I'd eventually die like that." She paused. "If I ever die in your company you have permission to laugh at my corpse and say you told me so."
"You're not going to die in my company. Now before you change the subject again--"
"Even if I am what you seem convinced I am...what does it change, right now?"
"Right now? This moment? Nothing. But later..."
"Then I deal with it later. In my line of work I deal with things when they become a problem." She paused, and a random thought slipped out. "I establish, I don't maintain."
Then, another one.
"That armor you wore," she said, "Back in Ivarstead, I was just thinking...I've never seen you wear armor before. Why then?"
"Sigurd is paranoid and wished me to have some. He was in possession of the Lord's Mail, and said it was the best suited armor when combined with the ring."
"The Lord's Mail, I've read about that armor," she said. The term brought her back to a moment looking down at a book in the College of Winterhold, and she repeated word for word what she could almost see before her. "The Lord's Mail, sometimes called the Armor of Morihaus or the gift of Kynareth..."
Sadrith stopped on seeing the stare from Torovan.
"Me with Pelinal's armor, and you with the one belonging to Morihaus..." She laughed. "I'd almost call that too convenient."
"Much of warfare is of the mind, and a battle can be won before it has even begun with the right sort of thought, implanted in the right sort of way." Torovan smirked. "And nothing will panic the Thalmor like a sighting of the Crusader and one who even vaguely resembles one who once traveled with him."
"I'll bow to your wisdom then," Sadrith replied, "I'm more of a soldier than a general, and I prefer to be pointed in a direction and told 'kill in that direction' if there are many foes to fight."
"You should be wary of thoughts like that," he said.
"I already have a lot of thoughts to be wary about..." she mumbled under her breath. It was like a shooting gallery in her mind, no sooner would she fix one to the wall than another would pop up, bobbing and weaving and taking up energy she didn't have. "But perhaps I should stay close. Being close to you seems to quiet my head."
He didn't respond to that.
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They entered Riften from the south, just after mid-day. Sadrith brought Torovan to a table in the Bee & Barb and said they could set out for the Guild early the next morning, before the sun had risen.
"This woman is in the sewers?"
"She is, yes," Sadrith replied, "There is another way in but as you aren't one of us I can't show you. So we go in the front way."
"Or, you could bring her up here."
Sadrith stopped. She honestly hadn't thought about that.
"It would take less time, but I don't know if she'd agree. I could go ask but that'd delay your operation a bit longer as there's something else I'm meant to pick up."
"That brush I saw mentioned in one of your letters, I assume?"
"And things to tend to...as guildmaster..." Sadrith trailed off, and ordered some food, which she quickly devoured. The skooma was wearing off, and as it fell her appetite rose. "Ah, that's better."
Torovan sat watching her. She greeted a few of those passing by - the two Argonians running the place, Haelga, and some of the Riften guards, and a courier who had a note for her.
"Your guild must have need of you."
"It's not from the guild," Sadrith said, groaning slightly. "It's an invitation."
"And why should that disturb you so?" Torovan asked. She could almost hear the raised eyebrow.
"It's an invitation to the wedding of Ingun Black-Briar in two days. I'm not sure what you know of this family--" Sadrith stopped, and took a shaky breath. "But this isn't the sort of invitation I can refuse."
"Again - why should that disturb you so?"
"I don't--I don't care for crowds," Sadrith protested. "Having to dress up, being in a crowd of people, expecting at any moment that--it doesn't matter. It would be open to the public anyway, but..."
She took a deep breath.
"I'd ask you to come along after your operation, if I wasn't certain you'd hate it too...and that there's likely not a tailor in town that could make you something suitable in time."
"I have something suitable," Torovan waved one hand idly. "If you're that worried for my welfare, I can appear with you."
"I'm being PAID to worry about your welfare," she said, "Something that clearly I don't need to. But if you insist on joining me..."
She could already see it. Her, walking through the crowd on his arm, struggling to speak and being unable to do so, while he laughed alongside her. Finding no words that wouldn't sound embarrassing, and remaining silent.
"Anyway," she said, "I am sorry for the delay, but...consider the Black-briar family...necessary to the operation of the guild here."
"And you're afraid of Maven."
"I am not afraid of her!"
"You are." There was a smirk she could see well even through all those bandages. "You will tackle dragons and gods but a mere woman frightens you?"
"Maven Black-Briar is no mere woman," Sadrith replied.
There was a lengthy pause. She'd ordered him a cut of meat, rare, and he proceeded to eat it in silence.
When he spoke up it was more serious. "And the Thalmor?"
"Right." Sadrith's face sunk into her palms. "Right, we've got to tell someone about THAT. I'll...make a round of the city and tell the Jarl, and then the guards, and head down to ask the face sculptor."
So once she had herded him to Honeyside, she proceeded to do just that. Jarl Laila appreciated the warning, was already in fact aware of the increasing Thalmor presence. She extracted a promies from Sadrith that she'd act in defense of Riften if there was an incursion while she was there, one which was quickly made.
"I expect no reward," Sadrith said, when asked. Then she gave a slight smile. "First pick of their weapons and armor, maybe, once they've passed. Honorhall could use the funds."
Jarl Laila bowed her head slightly and gave a smile, while Maven, who was in the same hall, merely gave the same passive stare she always had.
When she left she spoke to the guards, and then to Balimund, to whom she sold the elven daggers she'd picked from the bodies at Ivarstead. Then to the Pawned Prawn to pick up a few things. A few dresses, shirts, dolls, wooden swords.
And then, finally, to Honorhall.
Constance Michel greeted her with a smile, and then helped her get in the bag and packages she was carrying. "Children, the dragonborn is here!"
It only fit, Sadrith thought, to use profit from war to make these little faces smile.
---------------------------------------
The Son of the Void saw for the first time a child, and thus did the first seed of Doubt take root in his mind.
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damnfandomproblems · 6 months ago
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Fandom Problem #6485:
The Chipspeech fandom is so small (this fandom has like 14 people, tops) but it's got so much toxicity and drama crammed into it, entirely because of this one radical left-wing clique that's taken over the fandom. To be honest, the Chipspeech drama is some Mean Girls level stuff. Honestly the drama could fill a whole book, but here's the cliff notes:
Before I got into Chipspeech, I was going through my edgy phase and posted right wing political stuff just to piss people off. Everyone shunned me and called me a Nazi and worse. I got bitter and made extra edgy memes, made up headcanons specifically to offend people and talked about everyone who shunned me and said I wasn't welcome in Chipspeech. I realized though that I wasn't getting anywhere so I stopped talking about the clique and changed my mind over time and became a lot more politically moderate, and even apolitical. I lost my edge and became more peaceful and kind. I was all alone but eventually, likely due to losing my edgy persona, I made some friends and started a Chipspeech Discord server. Unfortunately, in spring of this year, things EXPLODED.
Their leaders (let's name them A and B) lashed out at me when I tried to make amends and call for peace, HARD. A left a scathing comment on my video open letter, and along with B, they lambasted me on Twitter. My friends came to my defense, but they were all subsequently blocked and also blasted for supporting me.
I was blamed for a post a (now former) friend made bullying A, but nobody believed that I had been framed and they still think I made those posts no matter how hard I tried to prove my innocence, even though my other friends and I called the real poster out on her behavior and demanded she apologize.
I joined another general TTS server run by another clique member, whom I'll call C. C would run interference for A and B and heavily police my language, and even forced me into a political discussion, trying to make me say that I agreed with her on something even though I was extremely uncomfortable. I ended up in a voice call with A, B and C and I had a lot of fun talking to them and sharing memes. But later A revealed they were pretending to have fun and chastised me for "sucking up to them like nothing happened". I later found out C was screenshotting my messages to her and sending them to A and B, which led to me cutting C off.
These people are so vicious they excluded a person who made a Chipspeech recommendations blog just because he recommended a song my friend and I made.
And this heavy gatekeeping and "one strike and you get the death penalty" mentality in the fandom has scared at least 5 people away from Chipspeech entirely and prevented numerous others from ever giving Chipspeech a chance. People who like Plogue's other software products (Plogue being the Chipspeech developers) are HORRIFIED by the clique and believe that the Chipspeech fanbase is an embarrassing stain on Plogue's reputation.
The clique is actively killing the Chipspeech fandom, which was already a struggling, fledgling fanbase, but they don't care. To them, it's worth all the bloodshed and pain to keep out the people they deem as "irredeemable Nazis" even though nobody here was ever a Nazi to begin with and I've become a completely different person from the edgelord they rallied against.
I just wish some more people would get into Chipspeech, refuse to bend to the clique's will and not participate in the drama, and just vibe and prove that Chipspeech can't be killed.
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queenofmalkier · 2 years ago
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In regards to the arrow removal, I think a lot of people are not considering the context in which Nynaeve made the decision. And I am here to defend my wife, obvy.
For starters - they're going to Egwene, who Nynaeve refuses to think of as anything but 100% FINE AND OKAY AND DEFINITELY NOT TRAUMATIZED. And Egwene can channel which means she can heal.
Nynaeve spent enough time in the tower to basically see the impossible compared to her knowledge of healing before. Suddenly a lot of her knowledge is irrelevant because the one power can fix things better than she can with traditional medicine. Nynaeve is stubborn, but she takes healing seriously. She'll always choose the best option.
That informs her decision. The most important thing is getting Elayne off the active battlefield and to Egwene for healing. The closest I can think of is Star Trek - you wouldn't treat a wound when in ten minutes it's going to be gone, you just need to get the injured person to the doctor.
(Side note but I don't believe she had anything on her to even treat a wound at the time, either, given the sul'dam costume.)
Now, I've gone through a lot of first aid training due to various jobs I've held, so I'm right there with everyone saying not to take it out! You do not take the thing out. Never, ever, ever. Pulling/pushing it out can cause more damage and more bleeding and no one but a medical professional should be touching that sort of injury. This is a modern approach though! Remember, context.
I've seen a lot of people talking about her breaking the shaft before pushing it through, but that would actually be worse. There's no way to cleanly break the fletching away, which means by tugging it through she'd be introducing splinters of wood into the wound. Also the breaking is in regards to arrowheads, not the fletching.
The fletching (feathers on the back) is not actually the dangerous part of the arrow. I've seen some people say it was a crossbow bolt, but either way, from what we were shown the arrowhead itself had exited Elayne's leg already. If that was the case, pushing the shaft through wouldn't actually be harmful to her. It would hurt like hell, but it wouldn't cause any more damage.
I tried finding some actual sources for this specific scenario, but unfortunately most articles are focused on removing the arrowhead and not the shaft (and were also paywalled, boo). The closest I found was information from U.S. Army Surgeon Joseph H. Bill who essentially catalogued American Indian arrows as a way to determine the best removal technique.
He advised not applying traction to the shaft due to the likelihood of the arrowhead coming lose and remaining in the body, but I couldn't find what he advised if the arrowhead had already passed through the body although I did find this quote "An arrow may be pushed out as well as plucked out."
I DID find this lovely gentleman giving a very in depth discussion on medieval arrows as well as removal techniques and some of those are shove it through and hope for the best. (He also mentioned that healing the infection was what doctors and healers handled rather than wounds which... wow. Remind me to never be a medieval soldier in case I ever get that longing.)
So, yeah. I trust Nynaeve was right about her approach to the wound, and I feel like this is a case of a modern audience not trusting her knowledge because of our own knowledge of how those injuries are approached currently. I do think the scene could have been improved (in that regard) if they had Nynaeve explain her thought process, but overall, we got the point: Nynaeve felt like an utter failure, she couldn't help her friend, she couldn't do anything with all her alleged power. What good is she to her friends?
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someonewhogotanaccount · 2 years ago
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List of all the badass stuff I've done
I have a reputation to lose. Although I somehow like to be a soft, sweet and cute bun.
Still. Everyone I've told about the cute-thing in real life has asked me "What the hell did you do to make them think you are cute???". That's why I'm going to prove my badassness now:
I practically taught my own mother the word "fuck" (even though she always says "fucking" instead of "fuck", which is why I always almost get a fit of laughter. She probably doesn't even know exactly what it means)
I have often skipped school. Probably eight times in my life (for example, when my cat had babies and I didn't want to leave her alone and I wanted to see the blood pouring out of her because I'm so badass)
I have gone through the "Forbidden Aisle" of my school six times (three times because I had an appointment for a conversation and three times because I just wanted to do illegal things hehehe ;)
I once had a conversation with my principal (because I wanted to discuss a presentation for a special talent project because I'm such a badass that I had to give him a presentation about my badassness since otherwise he wouldn't have been able to grasp it properly)
speaking of my principal, I had a meeting with him lately and guess what: I made him cry 💀
one of my class, who I can't stand, once asked me in the middle of class to send her my paper so she didn't have to work on it herself. I then copied the sheet and sent it to her (and thus to all her friends). They were really happy about it - until they found out that I had moved all my notes to another page beforehand, so that they only had a blank sheet (you should have seen their faces. First they were cheering loudly, and then this. But they didn't express themselves very clearly either. And they are always gossiping about me. Haha, that was fun >:)
I sing "Feliz Navidad" to my best friend every day so she and I can both suffer from this catchy tune
Have I already mentioned that I have a Killercat???
In the final: I have deceived all of you. Because, as sorry as I am, I DON'T LIKE KITKATS AT ALL!!! I love Snickers, Mars and Co. But KitKats? Nooooooo thanks but no. There are definately worse snacks, but it's also not exactly delicious.
MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!! I'm really evil. And a complete badass.
(Sorry about that)
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