#i'm trash for this game please kill me

[animamii]

Fuck Yo Man! | Toji Fushiguro

"see imma killer, but i got feelins',

i catch you widdem i jus might kill him"

the origin story of lockedup!Toji and y/n; inspired by Fuck Yo Man by King Von

✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧

Toji's jaw was clenched tight, eyes narrowed as he eyed down some target he didn't give two shits about. It was just another job and he desperately needed money. Rent was definitely due. From a distance Toji watched the guy, some scruffy looking fella with dirty blonde hair, enter the liquor store. He knew how this game was played—watch, wait, strike. The moment presented itself when they slipped up, moving careless like they forgot they were at war. He could see the guy through the windows, walking through the aisles and grabbing a soda before he heads to the counter near the entrance. It was now or never.

Toji, dressed in a black hoodie over his usual fitted black tee, sauntered with that usual sag in his step, gun clutched inside the band of his sweats. His eyes dart back and forth as he pulls up his hood, cautious for any witnesses or passersby. At this time of day, the streets were empty. The bell above the liquor store’s door jingled softly as Toji stepped inside, shoulders squared, gaze sharp. Dim fluorescent lighting made the store look hazy, with the stale scent of cheap booze and cigarette smoke filling the air. The cashier, a younger guy with tired eyes, barely looked up from his phone.

The blonde guy was at the counter now, pulling crumpled bills from his pocket. Toji had done this a thousand times before; fast, clean, no loose ends. His grip tightened around the handle of his piece, still tucked into his waistband. He took one step closer—then everything went to hell.

The guy turned at the last second, eyes widening in recognition, and Toji knew—he knew. Before Toji could even pull the trigger, the blonde swung first. The soda bottle in his hand shattered against Toji’s temple, sending shards of glass and sticky liquid dripping down his face.

Toji barely flinched.

With a grunt, he grabbed the guy by his collar and slammed him into the counter. The cashier yelled, diving under the register as Toji yanked his gun free and pressed it against the guy’s ribs at an angle.

"Stupid move," Toji muttered, more annoyed than in pain.

The guy’s breath hitched, his hands trembling and eyes blown wide with fear. Toji had done enough jobs to know when someone was about to beg. But he had no patience for it.

He pulled the trigger; the muffled pop of the silencer was the only sound before the blonde crumpled to the floor. The moment stretched, heavy, thick with something unspoken. Then... Sirens.

"Shit."

Toji turned on his heel, feet already moving before his brain fully caught up. He burst out of the liquor store and onto the street, his heart slamming against his chest. The flashing red and blue glow of patrol cars lit up in the distance, their engines roaring closer. His rushed jog had now turned into a full sprint, breaking his neck to look back every few seconds to see just how close the cops were to being on his ass.

"God, forgive me. I know I'm wrong, but please, get my ass out of this situation..." Was all he could think.

His breath came in short, sharp bursts, forehead damp with sweat as he ducked into an alleyway, vaulting over a trash bin. The sirens wailed louder. His legs burned. He knew this part—run until you can’t, then run some more. But even Toji knew he couldn’t outrun the entire city. Jumping over a metal fence with practiced ease, he went back to his rushed jog. Chest heavily rising and falling with each pant of a breath, he tried to find somewhere to duck off to.

That’s when he saw her.

A girl. Standing just outside a rusted apartment door, watching him with something eerily calm in her eyes. For a split second, neither of them moved. Then she did the unthinkable. She lifted a hand. Beckoned.

"Boy, come on."

Toji hesitated. Just for a moment. Then he was moving, slipping past her and into the dimly lit apartment. She shut the door behind him, sealing him away from the chaotic mess that he had created outside. He was breathing heavily, dripping with sweat and his mind racing as he looked at the floor. When he looked up, she was staring him down, arms crossed. She looked at him in silence, studying his face for a second.

"Do you still got your pole?"

Toji glanced at the gun in his grip, then back at her. A slow, amused half smile curled on his lips.

"You already know."

The apartment was small, warm white lighting coming from one of those tall lamps that are always stationed in a corner. The faint scent of something floral lingered in the air—maybe perfume, maybe detergent. It didn’t matter. Toji wasn’t focused on that. He was focused on her. The girl stood a few feet away, arms crossed with her head tilted slightly as she looked him over. Her expression was unreadable, but she wasn’t panicking. No fear in her eyes. That alone was enough to make Toji wary.

"You gonna keep standing there bleeding on my floor, or you gonna sit your ass down?"

Toji exhaled, finally registering the sharp sting on his temple where the bottle had cracked against him. He reached up, fingers coming away sticky with half-dried blood and soda. Half of his face was covered in blood, mixing with the sweat that made his hair cling to his forehead.

"Mmcht," he muttered, finally pushing himself off the wall and walking further into the room, gun still loosely gripped in his hand. She didn’t flinch, just nodded toward the couch.

"First aid kit’s under the sink," she said casually, as if she hadn’t just pulled a total stranger off the street and let him into her home.

Toji dropped onto the couch with a grunt, the adrenaline slowly wearing off, leaving behind exhaustion and the faint buzz of leftover tension. He let his head fall back against the cushions, chest still rising and falling from the chase.

"You do this often?" he finally asked, cracking an eye open to look at her. That's when he finally took in every detail. She adorned a cut wife beater tank top, snug against her body. Toji noticed she wasn't wearing a bra either, her nipples softly protruding through the textured white fabric. He also noticed how snug the printed boxer shorts she wore were, showing off the cute shape of her booty. A gold anklet was wrapped around her left foot, and she was barefoot.

"Do what?" she replied, grabbing the kit from under the sink.

"Pick up bloody strangers off the street."

She snorted. "Only the interesting ones."

Toji huffed a quiet laugh, watching as she sat down on the coffee table in front of him, popping open the first aid kit. He could have done it himself—he wasn’t new to patching up wounds—but he let her take over, watching her carefully as she dabbed at the cut on his forehead with an alcohol pad. It immediately stung, Toji hissing and instinctively jerking back.

"Oh, don’t be a baby," she muttered, gripping his chin and forcing him still.

Bold. He liked that.

"You don’t even know what I did out there," he said, watching her through half-lidded eyes. Toji started to soak even more details about her, the way her hair fell. The feeling of her acrylic nails as they propped his chin up to look at her. The way her lips were slightly parted as she focused on cleaning up his wound. The little things.

She didn’t stop, didn’t even hesitate. "Don’t need to."

That made him pause. His whole life, people only did things for him out of fear, out of money, out of necessity. But she? She had nothing to gain. No reason to help him. And yet, here she was. Quite honestly Toji was confused, she must've had a few screws loose to have let a bleeding man who was running from the cops into her home.

"You crazy or somethin’?"

She smiled, a soft puff of air leaving her lips, "Maybe."

Silence settled between them as she continued cleaning him up, her fingers brushing against his skin, surprisingly gentle despite the sharpness in her gaze. Toji wasn’t used to softness. Not in the life he lived, not in the world he knew. And yet, here he was—sitting on a stranger’s couch, letting her clean him up like it was just another Tuesday. His body finally started to relax, the weight of the day's events sinking into his bones. The adrenaline had done its job, but now, it was slipping away, leaving behind something heavier. The warmth of the apartment felt foreign against his skin, too safe, too still.

"You got a name?" he asked, his voice rough and low.

She didn’t look up from her work, just nodding and carefully placing a bandage over the gash on his forehead. "I do."

Toji smirked at that, tilting his head slightly. "You gonna tell me?"

She finally met his gaze, lips curving just a little. "What do you need my name for, mystery man? You ain't plannin’ on stickin’ around, are you?"

Toji chuckled under his breath, shaking his head. She had a point. He didn’t even know why he was still here. He should’ve been plotting his next move, figuring out how to lay low for the next few days. And yet…

"I'd like to know the name of the person who saved my ass," he said simply. She seemed to consider that, eyes scanning his face as if deciding whether or not he was worth the answer.

"Y/N."

Toji let the name roll around in his head for a second. It suited her.

"Toji," he offered in return, looking directly into her eyes as if this were a regular meet cute. He started to think back to when he was running, praying to God. In his twisted head he started to think, this is an angel sent from God himself.

"Well, Toji, you should wash your hands of any residue or whatever then get some rest. I’d say you’re safe for now, but who knows how long that’ll last." Getting up from the coffee table, she goes to throw away the soiled cotton pads.

Toji snorts, "You always this welcoming?"

"Only when fate drops a half-dead man at my doorstep," she smiles, washing her hands in the kitchen sink, "Bathroom is down that hall to the left."

Nodding, Toji finally gets up from the couch, his body now aching from the lack of adrenaline and strain from every fucking thing. Turning on the bathroom light, he takes in his surroundings. Girly face washes and makeup. Loose hair ties and bobby pins. A gold nameplate of yours written in cursive font. Cute. His large, calloused hand pumps the foam soap, peach bellini. He continues to look around your bathroom as he lathers his hands.

That's when he starts to notice... little things. Things that didn’t quite add up.

Toji had been in plenty of women’s places before, enough to know the usual setup—perfume on the counter, a few hair products, maybe a scented candle or two. But this? This was different. The towel on the rack was damp, like it had just been used. The toothbrush in the holder wasn’t alone—there was another one. Slightly worn down, like it had been used regularly. His eyes flicked to the razor in the shower, the one next to the pink one. A man’s razor.

His jaw tightened. She lived with someone.

Toji stared at himself in the mirror, water still running, hands resting on the edges of the sink. His reflection looked like hell—hair all disheveled, bruises forming on his cheek bone where the bottle had hit him, exhaustion settling in his eyes. But his mind wasn’t on himself anymore. It was on her.

Why the hell had she helped him? Was she just reckless, or was there something more? With a slow exhale, he turned off the faucet and grabbed a towel, drying his hands. He didn’t like walking into a situation blind. He especially didn’t like walking into someone else’s mess.

Stepping out of the bathroom, he caught sight of her in the kitchen, tying her hair up as she rummaged through the fridge. The overhead light cast a warm glow on her skin, and for a split second, she looked… normal. Like this was just another night in her home.

But Toji knew better.

"You live alone?" His voice came out casual, too casual.

Glancing at him over her shoulder, the faintest smirk tugs at her lips. "Why? You worried?"

Toji didn’t answer. Just leaned against the doorway, arms crossed.

She pulled out a bottle of water, unscrewing the cap before taking a slow sip. Her eyes stayed on him the entire time, like she knew exactly what he’d been thinking about in that bathroom.

"Nah," she finally said, licking a drop of water off her lip. "I don’t."

Toji’s grip on his forearm tightened.

"You expecting them back tonight?" His voice was level, but it lingered with an underlying cautiousness and something else he couldn't quite put his finger on.

She tilted her head, watching him. Measuring. "No," she said after a beat, placing the bottle on the counter. "Not tonight." Toji studied her, the way she held herself, the way she wasn’t scrambling to explain or reassure. She wasn’t afraid. Not of him. Not of whatever situation she had going on.

A slow smirk tugged at the corner of Toji’s lips, something dark and amused settling in his gaze. "You always this reckless, or just gotta thing for strays?"

Leaning against the counter, she crossed her arms over her chest, still unfazed. "Maybe I just like a little chaos."

Toji huffed out a quiet chuckle, running a hand through his sweat damped hair. Yeah, she was crazy. Or stupid. Maybe both. But there was something about her, something that kept him from walking right out that door. His fingers absentmindedly traced over the grip of his gun before slipping it back into his waistband. Eyes flickering to her again, watching the way she swayed slightly on her feet, relaxed. Comfortable.

Like she wasn’t standing in front of a killer. Like she wasn’t fully aware of what she’d just let into her home.

"You should be more careful," he muttered, rolling his shoulders as he stepped closer, his presence taking up more space in the tiny kitchen.

She didn’t move, didn’t shrink away. Just held his gaze with that same, unreadable expression. "You gonna be the one to teach me a lesson?"

Toji’s smirk widened, a low chuckle rumbling from his chest. "I don’t think you’d survive that, sweetheart."

Something flashed in her eyes—challenge, maybe amusement. "You’d be surprised what I can handle."

Toji wasn’t sure if it was the exhaustion settling into his bones, some leftover adrenaline still thrumming through his veins, or just the sheer absurdity of the situation. But he found himself shaking his head with a smirk, exhaling a slow breath.

y/n moved with ease, walking past him to grab something from a drawer. Toji took the opportunity to let his eyes trail over her again, memorizing little things he hadn’t noticed before. The way her stack of gold necklaces caught the dim light, the curve of her waist, the slow, deliberate way she moved—like she had nothing to fear. Like she knew exactly who she was letting into her space.

The apartment was small, but cozy in a way that felt lived in. Not just a space, but a home. It was a foreign concept to Toji, who was used to cheap motels, dingy safe houses, and places he never intended to stay in for long. But this place—it smelled like vanilla and a hint of tobacco, had blankets thrown haphazardly over the couch, a mug half-filled with cold tea on the counter. It had warmth. A thing he didn’t deserve yet found himself sinking into.

"You wanna tell me why you were out there bleeding all over the damn sidewalk?" she asked, not looking up as she pulled out a joint and a pack of cigarettes. Flicking open the carton's top, she sticks it out to offer him one.

Toji tilted his head, amused as his fingers fish for a cigarette out of the box. "You really wanna know, or you just making conversation?"

She popped the joint between her lips, using one hand to bring a pink patterned clipper lighter up to the tip to light it. The cherry of the joint started to glow a faint red as she inhaled slowly, eyes half-lidded as she studied him through the curl of smoke.

"You don’t gotta tell me," she said, finally exhaling, "but I figure if you’re hiding out here, I should at least know if I gotta start packing a bag."

Toji gave her a lopsided grin, shaking his head. "Ain’t got nothing to do with you, sweetheart. Just a job gone messy."

Her gaze flickered to the gun still tucked at his waist, her expression once again unreadable. "Messy how?"

Toji took his time lighting his cigarette, taking a slow drag before answering. "Client wanted someone gone. I made sure they were gone." He exhaled the smoke, watching her reaction. "Problem is, someone else was watching. Cops got there quicker than expected."

She simply hummed like he’d just told her the weather. "Unlucky."

Toji huffed a laugh, smoke coming out of his nose. "Yeah, somethin’ like that."

Silence settled between them, thick but not uncomfortable. Toji leaned back against the couch, letting the weight of the day press into his bones. His temple still throbbed from the broken bottle, but the bleeding had stopped. God the things he'd do for a perc right now.

"You ain’t scared?" he finally asked, wondering how a tiny girl like her could be so nonchalant with a six-foot-two criminal sitting in her living room.

She met his gaze, something slow and knowing in her eyes. "Of you?" She let the question hang for a moment before shaking her head. "Nah."

Toji exhaled another cloud of smoke, deep blue eyes watching her closely. "Why’s that?"

She tapped the joint's ashes into her heart shaped ashtray that sat on top of the coffee table, leaning forward in the seat perpendicular to the couch, elbow resting on her thigh. "Cause if you wanted to kill me, you’d have done it already."

Toji chuckled lowly, licking his lips. "You sure about that?"

She didn’t flinch. Didn’t even blink. "Yeah," she said simply.

He stared at her for a long moment, taking another slow drag of his cigarette. She was right, of course. If he had planned to kill her, he wouldn’t have wasted time talking. Wouldn’t have let her patch him up. But there was something about her.

Knocking him out of his thoughts, the wailing of sirens blares through the air. Bright white lights flashing through the curtains of the front windows. Both of them look towards the front door, silent. Guess it was the kind of situation that called for an all-night search.

"Well, looks like you're stuck here for the night."

Toji let out a slow exhale, rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek as he glanced toward the window. The red and blue lights cut through the thin curtains, casting eerie shadows across the walls. He should’ve felt trapped, on edge. But instead, he found himself oddly calm.

"Shit luck," he muttered, dragging a hand through his hair before taking another drag of his cigarette.

She didn’t look the least bit concerned as she took another slow pull from her joint, watching him through half-lidded eyes. "Yeah, well," she exhaled a stream of smoke, "guess that means you’ll be getting real comfortable."

Toji chuckled under his breath. "Seriously though, you got a few screws loose or just got a soft spot for trouble?"

The corner of her lip quirked up as she leaned back into the chair, joint snug between her two long acrylic nails. "Wouldn’t call it soft. Just got good instincts."

Toji hummed, tilting his head. "That so?" His cigarette sat tucked between his pink lips, and she could see the sharpness in his canines as he spoke.

"Mmhmm." She tapped her ashes into the ashtray again, her gaze steady. "And my instincts tell me you’re not as reckless as you act."

That caught Toji’s attention. His smirk faltered just slightly, eyes narrowing as he studied her. Most people assumed he was all brawn, no thought behind his actions. But her? She saw something else.

"That what you think?" he mused.

She nodded. "You wouldn't have made it this far otherwise."

Toji let her words sit between them, a strange mix of amusement and curiosity stirring in his gut. She wasn’t wrong. He’d survived this long because he was careful, calculated—even when things went south. But what did that mean for right now? He should’ve been looking for an exit, planning his next move. But instead, he was still here. In her space. Letting the sirens wail outside without so much as a flinch.

She stubbed out what was left of her joint and stood, stretching her arms over her head before giving him a lazy glance. "Couch pulls out into a bed," she said. "Sheets are in the closet. I’d offer you my bed, but I don’t know you like that."

Toji let out a low chuckle. "Yeah? And yet, you let me in your house."

She shrugged, turning toward the hallway. "Like I said—good instincts."

Toji watched her disappear into the dimly lit hall, the scent of smoke and vanilla lingering in the air behind her. He exhaled, leaning his head back against the couch.

Yeah. He was stuck here for the night. And maybe… he didn’t mind.

✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅ ) ･ﾟ✧

omgeezyyyy I had so many different ways I wanted lockedup!Toji and y/n to meet I can't choose!! But I fckin love this song and I'm a sucker for sampling a song for a fic. I miiight write other versions of y/n meeting Toji but I just hadz to write this!!

alsoooo I wanna make this a multipart this is just part oneeee

tags ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ @psoycy @yourname-exee

[bytemee]

GOT HER OWN. — karina (part two)

"𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗶𝘁. 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝗻 𝗶𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵, 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝗻 𝗶𝘁."

in which — y/n is a valorant streamer who loves trolling and chasing a spot on the top 10 valorant clutches list. when katarinabluu, a high-ranked player, takes the #1 spot, y/n throws shade during their stream only for katarina to clap back online.

pairing ! - streamer!karina x streamer!gn!reader

genre ! - smau w a little bit of written text, enemies to lovers, comedy

warnings ! - flirting, kys/kms jokes, swearing, this is very bad x2, readers really down bad but like… can u blame them

featuring ! - aespa, yunjin (le sserafim), keeho (p1harmony) minji (newjeanz), and more

a/n: part one. also this is kinda rushed

the day finally came.

after multiple tweets from both sides, begging from fans, and you-mostly you, karina had finally caved. you'd tweeted, she'd tweeted. you'd both been talking so much shit, and now, it was finally time to back it all up. fans were waiting, the chat was ready, and you were grinning at your screen, barely containing the excitement.

"alright, alright," you muttered, adjusting your headset. "we're just waiting for karina to join the discord call."

username i'm so scared for you y/n. jenaissante if you lose don't think about coming back home. jenaissante you have to stay out on the streets. username yunjin pls. username💀💀💀💀 username i never seen you smile so much in my life.

you glanced over at your chat, and before you could complain about the constant teasing, you heard the familiar ding—the sound of karina joining the call.

"hello?"

your hand slapped over your mouth at the sound of her voice, and it was like she hadn't just spent weeks publicly trash-talking you online.

"uh, hello? is anyone there?" karina's voice came through again, this time, with a bit of confusion.

"yeah, i'm here," you managed to say, your voice cracking slightly. you winced. great start.

she hummed softly, like she was assessing you already, you tried to not focus on that, but your mouth started moving before your brain could stop it.

"your voice is so..." you trailed off.

"sexy, right?" her confidence made your stomach flip. you could almost hear the smirk in her tone.

"can you tell me to kill myself?" you blurted out, eyes widening as you covered your mouth.

username OH MY GODDDD WHAT username i want to die rn username WHAT AM I WATCHING. jenaissante i jenaissante WHAT jenaissante ARE YOU FLIRTING RIGHT NOW???? username PLEASE STAND UP

"what?" karina sounded half-shocked, half-amused.

"i said, can you tell me what map," you lied quickly, tryina to cover.

there was a pause, then a soft laugh. "oh. ascent."

username IM FUCKING DYINGGGG username UR NOT SLICK AT ALL Y/N. username THAT SOUNDS NOTHING ALIKE

you side-eyed your webcam before trying to focus on the game, not her nor your chat.

that failed.

as the match started, you locked in iso, confident you could at least win the first round and set the tone. but confidence didn't count for much when karina absolutely destroyed you within the first 30 seconds.

"already?" she teased, and your jaw dropped. "i thought you'd at least make me work for it." you tried your best to get into the game, really you did. but with her taunting and teasing, it was hard not to get distracted.

"relax," you shot back, gripping your mouse tighter. "i'm warming up."

the chat was enjoying it though.

username Y/N YOU STILL HAVE TIME TO FAKE A POWER OUTAGE jenaissante "warming up" LMFAOOO username she's embarrassing you and she's not even trying.

round after round, it became painfully clear that karina wasn't just good-she was better. the first game on ascent ended with you losing 13-3.

"damn," karina said, a smile in her voice. "you got three rounds? that's cute.

you groaned, pulling at your headset. "you can shut up, y'know."

next up was icebox, and you swore you'd turn it around. except, somehow, it got worse. every time you thought you had the advantage, karina would outplay you, peeking angles you didn't expect, and her aim was perfect.

"are you even trying?" she asked, voice light.

you frowned. she didn't need to know how much it bothered you that you weren't performing as well as you wanted.

well, karina didn't just stream with you because it's what the fans wanted (and you), you two had actually made a deal. whoever won gets 100 gifted subs from the loser. and while the stakes were relatively low, you couldn't imagine losing, not with your pride on the line.

"i am trying," you muttered, frustrated but also... kind of impressed. "can you chill for like, two seconds?"

"nope," she replied casually.

icebox ended with an even worse score: 13-2.

username GOODBYE Y/N YOU'RE EMBARRASSING US username i want her to step on me username why do i actually feel bad for you rn. username WHATS HAPPENING username THIS IS SO PAINFUL TO WATCH

finally, you decided to switch things up. different agents, different strategies-something. you didn't care about pride anymore; you just wanted one win. but even then, karina still had the upper hand, winning every round like it was nothing.

your frustration hit its peak after another humiliating loss. "alright, new deal," you announced, crossing your arms.

"oh? another excuse?" karina sounded far too amused, and you hated how it made your heart jump.

"no," you shot back. "if you win the next match, i'll gift you 300 subs instead of the 100 we agreed on."

her tone instantly changed. "really? and if you win?"

your heart pounded in your chest, and for a split second, you considered backing out. but screw it-you'd already embarrassed yourself enough tonight. what's one more risk?

"if i win, you have to let me take you out on a date."

silence.

username Y/N IS INSANE jenaissante OMG username WHAT ARE YOU DOING??. 

jenaissante DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF RN??? username Y/N I AM ON THE FLOOR SCREAMING username THIS IS NOT HOW IT WORKS. username OH MY GOODNESS VALENTINE?????

finally, karina broke the silence, her laughter light and breathy. "a date?"

you swallowed hard, gripping your mouse tighter. "yeah. a date. unless you're scared you'll lose."

"oh, please," she scoffed, and you couldn't help the grin tugging at the corner of your lips.

this was it. this was the last game. you weren't going down without a fight, and honestly, you couldn't deny how fun it was. it had been a long time since anyone challenged you like this, and you found yourself enjoying getting your ass beat.

but all of a sudden you could swear karina wasn't playing as aggressively as before. there were moments where she'd miss shots she'd normally hit, giving you openings you knew weren't just luck.

"are you—" you blinked at your screen, the kill notification popping up after you managed to finally clutch a round. "are you throwing on purpose?"

karina laughed, the sound casual but somehow still flustering you. "what? no. maybe you're just getting better."

your jaw dropped. "karina. are you seriously—"

"what? i'm just saying," she interrupted.

username SHE'S LETTING YOU WIN RN I KNOW IT username Y/N DON'T SELL username OMGGGGGGGGG SHE LIKES YOU username АААААААННННН.

"karina, play seriously," you grumbled, your face burning.

"i am," she replied innocently. but when the next round started, you caught her hesitating just long enough for you to land a clean shot.

you couldn't hold back the grin spreading across your face. "you're so throwing."

"maybe i am," she admitted softly, and you nearly choked. "but you better make this date worth it if you win."

[pomefioredove]

Hello, I hope you’re having a lovely day!

May I order a sugar cookie, number 18, with powdered sugar, chocolate drizzle, and sprinkles please?

Thank you for reading my order and do please take your time with it!!!

hi anon!!! hope you enjoy~

order #18, sugar with powdered sugar, sprinkles, chocolate drizzle

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ making amends(?)

summary: the flirty regular at your work is someone you used to know tropes: coffee shop au, hurt/comfort (BARELY), exes to lovers characters: lilia additional info: romantic, gender neutral reader, reader is not yuu, fae!reader

When one finds a number on an empty coffee cup, they expect it to be from the barista, and not the customer.

But here you are, an empty, lukewarm cup in your palm, phone number written at the bottom.

"For cashier - call me ;)"

You really have no use for this- or time. It's trash, number or not. And, so, there it goes, along with the empty syrup pumps and the stirring sticks.

Of course, on Tuesday, it's an email.

On Wednesday, it's a gamertag.

On Thursday, it's a home address.

On Friday, it's a number again. This time, with a note:

"uninterested or playing hard to get?"

You let this one sit on the counter, teasing the customer who had so brazenly handed it back to you, drained of its bitter contents. This one seems to like the taste of black coffee- he calls it sweet.

On Saturday, "you should know I don't give up so easily"

And on Sunday, "dinner?"

This one, you take home with you. It sits on your lap, cold and empty, but stirring something warm within you. And you call the number. And it's him.

"You work an awful lot, don't you?" he says, holding his chin in his palm and leaning against the table.

"You're there every day of the week."

You take a deep sip of your drink, tart and sweet, something he'd ordered for you.

"...It's more of a hobby,"

"Oh?" he asks, tilting his head to the side. "And how's that?"

There's something familiar about him. His mannerisms, his fanged smile, even the way the candlelight catches in his dark hair. And yet, you're sure you've never met this man in your life.

"I'm retired," you shrug. "I have an inheritance, so I don't need money. I just need something to do during the day."

"And you chose making coffee?"

"I enjoy watching people,"

He hums, as if approving of your answer. He hasn't touched his drink or his squid ink pasta (a suitably strange choice for him), taking to studying you instead.

"It's refreshing to meet a fae who's open to the human way of living," he says. "I'm fond of it myself. I've taken quite a liking to online gaming."

You raise an eyebrow. "That's a bit different from a job, isn't it?"

"Oh, sure, but I've already a human job. I'm raising a human son,"

Your eyebrows raise at that, and you set down your drink. "Have you? Now, that's not something you hear every day,"

He nods. "Oh, yes. He's grown to be quite the studious and serious young man,"

"You must be very proud,"

"I am. And you? Any family?"

You clear your throat. "...None, no. I left Briar Valley some time ago. Never settled down,"

"And why's that?"

"Ah... war," you offer. He frowns. "Your family was killed?"

"They were in the army,"

"Army... army..." he mutters, drumming his fingertips on the table. "Hm. I suppose my memory isn't what it used to be- your surname doesn't remind me of anyone I served with."

"You served?"

He chuckles. "Oh, yes. I was the General,"

Oh... NO!

In the dark of night, the flickering candlelight of the restaurant, you can almost make out the long-haired, haughty, high-and-mighty General Lilia Vanrouge.

You stand, . "It's YOU!"

Lilia blinks his big eyes, near innocently. "Me? Have we met?"

"You changed your hair," you scowl. "And you look much less... mean without your armor. Don't you remember? When my family-"

Some foreign sense of familiarity flickers across Lilia's face, and he stands just as abruptly, jolting the table.

"You were the- ah, ah! Your brother was- and your father-"

You cross your arms. "Died while serving in your brigade! And when you came to offer your condolences to me-"

"-I seduced you- ah, how awful of me!"

"Yes- NO! Don't agree with me! I should be furious!"

Lilia sits back down, waving off the stares from the other tables. "Are you?"

You follow suit. "Well, I would like an apology,"

"Oh- yes, of course," he mumbles, "I am terribly sorry. I tried to look for you after the war, while I was traveling, but... you must have already left the Valley. I can't imagine the hardships you faced as a fae in that time."

You glower, almost angrier that he's sympathizing with you than you were when he was giving you that doe-eyed look of surprise.

"It must have been awful," he goes on. "I only had a taste of the hatred, but you lived in it- and with no one to come home to- oh, how very, very awful. I would be beside myself if I could speak to the younger me..."

You let him wear himself out, rambling on about his travels, his misadventures, and some good chicken he ate in the Scalding Sands, and then you wave him off.

"That's enough," you say. "Though it hardly fixes anything."

"I'm not sure paying for dinner will cover that, either," Lilia sighs.

He doesn't seem particularly sorry about it. But you're not particularly mad. Not anymore, at least.

"You may as well," you say. Lilia perks up at the proposal, and he digs through a hot pink wallet for thaumarks.

"Whatever else I can do to make amends- I've been working on that, lately. I decided I shouldn't die with so many regrets-"

"Please. You're not that old,"

"Heh. You'd be surprised at what years of war and children can do to a man," he says, almost smiling. "I'm sure you have your fair share of mistakes, too."

You roll your eyes. "We all do. What's important is that we live-"

"In the moment," he finishes, folding his wallet and putting it in his pocket. "So, you forgive me, then?"

You ponder on that. It was an awful long time ago, and though you do hold a grudge, it wasn't any more traumatizing than anything else...

...Moreover, this man- this petit, pink-haired fae in a pinstripe bowtie and board shorts- is someone you haven't met yet. You knew the General well, too well, but Lilia Vanrouge?

A complete stranger.

And perhaps one worth knowing, at that.

"...I'll think about it," you decide. "You'll have to earn it, though. It'll take many dinners to make up for this."

Lilia perks up and the promise, standing to help you out of your seat with a gentlemanly offering of his arm. You take it.

"Ah, then I look forward to my punishment,"

[formulafanfics13]

The Secret Girlfriend - Chapter 4

Masterlist

Disclaimer:

This fanfic will contain mature themes and topics (smut, abuse, power imbalance, drug use, alcohol dependency, control, and eating disorders). There will not be warnings throughout, so if you proceed with this fic, please bear this in mind!

The elevator doors whispered open with that luxury hush that only a building like Tour Odeon could master. Lewis stepped out behind Lando and was immediately met with the smell of something warm. A blend of fresh linen, strawberries, and the unmistakable undercurrent of weed that hadn't been smoked recently, but existed in the air like a perfume layered into the walls.

And then... the apartment.

Lewis had expected luxury, of course he had. But this wasn't just expensive. It was alive.

The floors were white marble softened by thick cashmere rugs, framed by sprawling floor-to-ceiling windows that looked out over the Monaco coastline. Light poured in like a spotlight, bouncing off high ceilings and curated chaos. There were actual million-dollar art pieces on the walls, Lewis could spot a Basquiat and what he thought was a Haring, but they weren't presented like trophies. They were just... there. Lived-in. Hung next to polaroids. Worn skateboards. A massive stack of unread magazines on a vintage glass coffee table. A crystal ashtray with a cherry vape still hissing softly inside it.

It was expensive, yes, but it wasn't a show home.

It was a home.

"Jesus," Lewis muttered, eyes wide.

Lando didn't blink. He was already tossing the Tom Ford bag onto one of the armchairs like it was a Tesco carrier. Then, with all the chaos of someone who'd clearly lived here long enough to be forgiven for anything, he flopped down next to Lewis on the long white sofa.

"Baby?" Lando called out, voice raised toward the hallway.

Silence.

"Lan, I'm your gaming room, clearing all the plates of half-eaten food you've left in here."

Her voice drifted through the penthouse like it lived in the walls. Soft. Feminine. Slightly annoyed, but not mad. The kind of voice that could command a room or lull it to sleep, depending on the hour.

Lando winced, glanced at Lewis with a guilty half-smile. "She's gonna kill me."

Lewis laughed, still scanning the place. "Can't blame her."

Then they heard it. Footsteps. Soft. Barefoot. Approaching.

Lewis turned toward the hallway just as she appeared. And the world. Stopped. Turning.

She wasn't runway-ready. Wasn't glamorised or airbrushed or dolled up in gold.

She was wearing one of Lando's oversized McLaren t-shirts, the logo half-tucked into the waistband of his basketball shorts. Her hair was up, a loose bun barely holding, strands falling against her cheeks. No makeup. No jewellery. No shoes. No socks.

Just skin. And glow. And she was holding a black bin bag.

The most beautiful woman Lewis had ever seen was holding a fucking bin bag.

She paused when she saw them. Smiled. Then walked straight to Lando, leaned down, and gave him a soft, lingering kiss on the lips like she hadn't just walked in mid-trash collection. Like her mouth belonged there. Like she hadn't just revealed herself as a myth made real.

Then she turned to Lewis. Extended a hand. Calm. Poised. Respectful. "You must be Lewis," she said, voice still warm. "I'm Lily."

Lewis. Froze. Mouth open. Jaw half-hinged. Brain screaming.

This was Lily James. Lily Fucking James. The woman whose face was printed across every billboard in Milan, whose body sold perfume and lingerie and entire fashion houses. The girl who Vogue had called the second coming of the supermodel era. The unreachable. The untouchable.

She was standing barefoot in front of him with a goddamn bin bag and offering her hand like this was just another day in her calm, billion-dollar life.

"I- uh- yeah," Lewis stammered, standing so fast he nearly tripped. "I- yeah. Yes. Lewis."

She smiled. Not politely. But genuinely. The kind of smile that softened her whole face, made her seem younger, calmer, more real than any photo had ever managed.

"Nice to finally meet you," she said, then nodded toward the bin bag. "Sorry about the aesthetic. Not exactly Paris ready."

Lewis blinked. "You- you look great."

Lando snorted from the couch.

Lily tossed the bag by the door, then padded barefoot across the room to grab her vape off the ashtray. "You want something to drink? I just restocked the fridge."

"Uh- water? If that's okay."

"Water is always okay," she grinned, already disappearing into the kitchen.

Lewis slowly sat back down. Lando looked at him. "You good?"

Lewis blinked again. "I'm sitting in a penthouse with Lily James. Wearing your fucking shorts."

Lando shrugged. "Yeah."

"She just kissed you like- like- like she's yours."

Lando grinned. "She is."

And Lewis didn't have a single comeback. Just silence. Just awe. Just a thousand questions he knew he'd never ask, because this wasn't just a reveal.

This was a love story. Hidden in plain sight.

The silence that filled the penthouse wasn't awkward. It was surreal.

Lewis still hadn't quite unclenched his jaw from the moment Lily James - actual Lily James - walked into the room with a bin bag, kissed Lando on the mouth, and offered her hand like this was just... casual.

He didn't know what he was expecting next. Probably not her returning from the kitchen with two glasses of water, one in each hand, barefoot like a damn dream.

"Here," she said softly, handing one to him with that same golden smile.

Lewis took it, murmured, "Thanks," like he'd never said the word before in his life.

She handed the other to Lando as she moved to sit beside him, not leaning on him, not curled into him, just sitting close enough that their knees touched and her shoulder brushed his. Comfortable. Settled. Like this was where she lived.

And it was. The fucking penthouse, the McLaren merch, the vibe. This was her life, and Lewis was just being allowed a peek behind the curtain.

Lando took a sip from his water, then leaned back like it was nothing. Lily tucked one leg up under herself and rested the glass on her bare thigh. "I appreciate you going with him this morning," she said, tilting her head toward Lewis with an amused smile.

Lewis blinked. "Of course. Wasn't expecting the invite, but... glad I came."

Lily laughed softly, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "I couldn't do it. He's so picky with me when we shop together."

Lando groaned beside her. "I'm not picky."

She turned her head slowly, lips curled like she was holding in a laugh. "You made me try on eight different pairs of jeans last week. And still said you liked the first ones best."

"They were the best ones."

Lewis watched them with wide eyes, almost afraid to blink. They weren't performative. They weren't even flirty. They were just... this. Easy. Domestic. Like they'd had this banter since they were sixteen. Like they belonged in the same room without trying.

Lily turned back to Lewis. "I've been trying to get him to experiment more with colour. He's very safe."

"I just don't want to look like a traffic cone," Lando mumbled.

"Red isn't orange," she shot back. "And you wear fucking papaya every day."

Lewis laughed, tension easing slightly as he finally leaned back into the sofa, still clutching the water like it was a relic from a previous life.

This was the most he'd heard Lando speak about clothes. About colour. About anything outside racing, honestly. It was like discovering a whole new driver under the papaya logo. "You two... are honestly shocking," Lewis said, shaking his head. "You've been dating two years?"

Lily gave a small, knowing smile. "Give or take."

"And no one's even suspected it."

"We've had help," she said, sipping her water with a wink. "Jude's been covering. The internet thinks I'm still on-and-off with him."

"Yeah," Lando added. "Everyone assumes the guy in her photos is him. Or Pablo. Never me."

Lewis paused, blinking again. "Wait. You are in the photos?"

Lando grinned. "Sometimes. Background stuff. Reflections. Group shots. I don't post solo pics with her. Makes it easier."

"And you're... okay with that?"

He didn't even blink. "It's better this way."

Lily smiled at him, and it wasn't performative. It wasn't a reassurance or an act for Lewis' sake. It was quiet. Familiar. Full of something deeper.

Lewis looked between them and let out a stunned breath. "I feel like I'm hallucinating."

"You want to stay for lunch?" Lily asked, pausing in the doorway between the living room and the kitchen.

Lewis looked up from his water glass, momentarily startled. "Oh- no, I don't want to impose. I'm vegan anyway, I wouldn't expect you guys to-"

Lily blinked, then laughed. "You ever tried vegan gnocchi with roasted tomato sauce?"

Lewis raised his brows. "Yeah. I love that."

She smirked. "Then sit your ass down at the breakfast bar."

Lando snorted behind her. "Bossy."

"You love it," she shot back over her shoulder.

Lewis followed slowly into the kitchen, not quite sure where to look. It was huge: open-plan, walls of windows, glossy white counters, and marble that caught the light like it had been photoshopped. There was a cluster of Polaroids on the fridge, Lily and Lando at the beach, in Halloween costumes, in a blurry club bathroom. One of just Lando, shirtless, frying eggs. One of Lily in a silk robe, licking whipped cream off her finger.

But the kitchen itself? It felt lived in. There were small signs of real life. A half-full bottle of olive oil by the stove, a blender that looked like it had seen war, a fruit bowl overflowing with strawberries, oranges, and a few bruised bananas.

Lily pointed to a barstool by the counter. "Sit."

Lewis obeyed. She moved straight to the fridge, pulled out a packet of gnocchi and a tupperware of pre-made sauce like she'd planned it.

"Wait," Lewis said, brow furrowing as she bent down to open one of the lower cupboards, "do you guys... have a whole cupboard labelled 'vegan things'?"

Lily glanced over her shoulder, grinning. "Yeah. Some of the girls I'm close with, Barbara, Gigi, Taylor, they stay here when they're in Monaco. A couple of them are vegan, and the last thing I need is to be responsible for cross-contaminating Bella Hadid's oat milk."

Lewis blinked. "Respectfully, what the fuck."

"It's just easier this way," she said, shrugging as she pulled out a pan and flicked the stove on like muscle memory. "One side of the kitchen is for normal stuff. That cupboard's for vegan. Everything's labelled."

She wasn't bragging. She wasn't even trying. This was just... life. A shared system. A way of functioning when your social circle included global supermodels and billionaires who panic over almond butter residue.

Lando wandered in a second later, stretching his arms above his head like he'd just rolled out of a nap. Lando opened the fridge and pulled out a glass bottle of pink lemonade and a smaller bottle of sparkling water. "Lemonade spritz?"

"Sounds fancy."

Lando grinned, pouring both into a tall glass over ice, garnishing with a sprig of mint like he wasn't the same guy who once tried to eat gummy worms with chopsticks mid-flight.

He slid the glass over and leaned against the counter, watching Lily hum under her breath as she sautéed garlic and chopped cherry tomatoes in record time. There was a Bluetooth speaker on the windowsill quietly playing something French and vibey.

And the way they moved? It was a fucking dance.

Lando passed her a wooden spoon without being asked. Lily slid the gnocchi into the boiling water and turned the heat down just as he reached past her to grab a bowl for grated vegan parmesan. Their bodies didn't even brush. It was second nature.

Lewis sat, sipping his drink, watching the quiet chaos of a well-oiled routine. It was the most intimate thing he'd seen in years. Not sexual, not even romantic. Just... fluid.

"You two do this often?" he asked, voice a little low, a little cautious.

"Almost every night," Lando replied, casual.

"Unless I'm at a shoot," Lily added. "Then I text him the recipe. And he FaceTimes me so I can talk him through it."

Lando rolled his eyes. "She literally had me making a carbonara in a fucking hotel in Baku."

"Was it good?" Lewis asked.

"Banging," Lily and Lando said in unison.

Lewis laughed, shaking his head as Lily drained the gnocchi and tossed it into the pan of sauce. She added a splash of oat cream, stirred, and plated it all with precision that felt less restaurant and more art show. She even topped it with cracked pepper and a drizzle of infused oil.

Then she placed the plate in front of Lewis like it was no big deal.

"There you go," she said softly. "Bon appétit."

Lewis blinked. "You sure you don't want to adopt me?"

Lando snorted. "Get in line."

Lily just smiled and leaned back into the counter, watching Lewis take the first bite. He groaned instantly.

"Okay, yeah, I get it now."

She raised a brow. "Get what?"

"You," Lewis said, looking between them. "You're not just some girl he's seeing. You're... home."

Lily's eyes softened. Just a little. "That's the idea."

Lando said nothing. But the way he glanced at her? That said everything.

The gnocchi is hot and rich and creamy, and Lewis is three bites in before he realises he's been sitting in silence, just watching the two of them move around each other like planets in orbit.

Lily sits cross-legged on a barstool now, fork in hand, hair tied up in a messy bun she secured with one of Lando's race team scrunchies. Lando sits beside her, elbows resting on the marble countertop, quietly demolishing his second bowl like he hasn't eaten in four days. Their knees bump under the counter every now and then, but neither of them flinch. Neither even react. They just lean into it.

"So..." Lewis leans back slightly on the stool, setting his fork down, his voice deliberately casual. "How'd you two meet?"

Lando grins without looking up. "You're gonna love this."

Lily glances over at him, already smiling. "You tell it."

"You're better at it."

She rolls her eyes but caves immediately. "Okay. Picture this: London. Six years ago. Tiny coffee shop. Shit weather."

"I was hiding from the rain," Lando adds, grinning.

"I was looking for somewhere to sit," Lily continues, eyes flicking toward Lewis now, soft and warm. "The place was full. Every table taken. Except his."

Lewis lifts his brows. "You just... sat down with him?"

"I asked first," she says with faux offence. "I said, 'You look like you hate people. Mind if I join?''"

"Best stranger I'd ever met," Lando smirks. 

"And you stayed with me," she fires back, poking his side.

Lewis watches the exchange with growing fascination, it's like they've done this dance a thousand times, and still love the beat.

"I knew from the first hour," Lando says after a pause. "That we were gonna be close. Maybe not this-" He gestures around at the apartment, the empty bowls, her bare feet on the stool rung. "-but something."

"Back then, we were just friends," Lily adds, a little softer now. "We stayed friends for almost two years. He moved in with me before we ever kissed."

Lewis's eyes widen. "Wait. What?"

"He didn't have time to decorate his own place," she shrugs. "I had a spare room. It made sense."

"You let him live with you?"

Lando chuckles. "Yeah. We moved to Monaco after that. The London flat became like our crash pad when work kept us in the UK."

Lewis stares between them, chewing on the thought. "So when did it turn romantic?"

Lily doesn't answer at first, she just looks at Lando.

He looks back, a small smile playing at his lips. "One day I asked her if she wanted to hike to that spot near the cliff."

"She thought it was a regular day," he adds.

"And he just... asked."

"No ring. No speech," Lando says. "Just... 'Be mine?'"

Lewis is quiet for a moment. Then exhales. "That's insane."

"It's us," Lily shrugs, sipping her water. "It worked."

Lewis shakes his head slowly. "I don't know what I expected. But it wasn't this."

Lando laughs under his breath, eyes lighting up with amusement. "It gets better."

Lewis looks up. "This place, this apartment-" He gestures vaguely at the opulent, magazine-worthy interior around them. "It's gorgeous. Like, ridiculously nice. I know you lot earn well, but this..."

"I let him choose the orange accents in the living room," Lily offers sweetly.

"Very generous," Lewis teases.

"He's also got a whole gaming cave upstairs. Neon lights. Headsets. Star Wars posters."

"It's a shrine to chaos," Lando nods proudly.

Lewis raises a brow. "But everything else?"

"She picked," Lando grins.

"She paid," Lily corrects gently, without shame or bravado.

Lewis blinks. "Sorry?"

"She bought it outright," Lando explains like it's not a fucking billion-euro sentence. "It was her idea. Her money. I just moved in."

"I do all the grocery shopping," he adds with a grin. "And buy her vapes."

Lily beams. "And I love him for it."

There's a beat of silence as Lewis processes that. The man who sits in engineering debriefs like he hates the concept of sunlight just casually revealed that his girlfriend, the most followed woman on Instagram, is also the one paying for their life.

And he clearly loves it.

"So," Lewis starts slowly, trying to shift focus before his jaw fully unhinges, "how many people actually... know about you two?"

Lily sets her glass down. "That's a fun question."

"She's got a list," Lando says, smirking.

Lily holds up one hand and starts counting on her fingers. "Okay. Lando's parents, his two sisters and his brother. My assistant. Our core friend group, Barbara Palvin, Lila Moss, Jude Bellingham, Pablo Gavi, Harry Styles."

Lewis's mouth parts, but he stays quiet.

"People from the fashion world," Lily continues. "Anna Wintour, Adriana Lima, Lily Aldridge, Gigi and Bella Hadid, the entire Kardashian-Jenner clan, Donatella, Domenico and Stefano, Kate Moss, Taylor Hill."

Lewis lets out a low whistle. "That's... some circle."

"It's surprisingly tight-knit," Lily says. "No leaks. No jealousy. We protect each other."

"And the grid doesn't know?" Lewis asks, eyes still wide.

"Not a clue," Lando grins.

"I had no idea," Lewis mutters.

Lily leans forward slightly, hands clasped under her chin. "You were the first we wanted to tell."

Lewis looks between them, stunned for what feels like the hundredth time that day. "Why?"

Lando shrugs. "You're real. You get the weight of both worlds."

Lewis sips the last of his water and sets the glass down with a soft clink. The kitchen is still warm from lunch, plates rinsed in the sink, the faint scent of basil and roasted garlic hanging in the air. Lily hums quietly to herself as she wipes down the counter, and Lando is leaned back against the fridge like it's a throne, arms folded, casual and cocky in the way only a man truly at peace can be.

"So..." Lewis finally says, tone slow, almost reluctant. "How the fuck-"

Lily snorts. Lando grins.

Lewis continues. "-has not a single driver figured this out?"

Lando pushes off the fridge, walking toward the counter with his hands in his pockets. He shrugs. "Because they're all too busy jerking off to her Instagram posts."

Lewis chokes on air.

Lily laughs, genuinely, openly, eyes sparkling with mischief. Lando just looks smug.

"I'm sorry, what?" Lewis asks, blinking like he misheard.

"I'm not even joking," Lando says, grabbing one of Lily's half-eaten strawberries from a bowl and popping it into his mouth. "Pierre's the worst. The actual worst."

"Pierre?" Lewis echoes, in a tone that already says yeah okay I believe that.

Lando nods like he's listing off names on a scoreboard. "Max and Charles right behind him. You should hear the way they talk about her. Charles once showed me a picture of her walking the Jacquemus show and just whistled like we were in fucking high school."

Lily tilts her head, amused. "What picture?"

"The one in the backless white slip dress," Lando grins. "You know the one."

Lewis groans. "I know the one."

Lily preens slightly but says nothing.

"Carlos and Oscar both have her Instagram notifications on," Lando continues, popping another strawberry like this is just a conversation about the weather. "You can see it in the way they comment, like, thirty seconds after she posts. Every time."

"I've seen Pierre repost her on his stories," Lewis adds, wide-eyed now. "More than once."

"Oh yeah," Lando nods, grabbing the carton of juice from the fridge. "He told me last week she's his dream girl. Called her 'goddess-level shit.'"

Lily turns from the sink with a smirk. "Did you correct him?"

"Absolutely not," Lando grins around the rim of the glass. "I just nodded."

Lewis lets out an incredulous laugh. "You evil little shit."

"It's fun," Lando shrugs. "I get to hear all their horny little comments and then go home and fold her laundry."

"And eat my cooking," Lily adds.

"And rail you into next week," he finishes, not missing a beat.

Lewis makes a strangled noise and Lily just winks.

"None of them know?" Lewis asks again, just to be sure. "Not even Max?"

"Especially not Max," Lando grins. "You've seen how that man acts."

Lily hums in agreement. "He reposted one of my campaign videos and tagged me with a heart emoji."

Lewis gapes. "He what?"

"I think he deleted it after someone asked if I was dating anyone," Lily says innocently. "He doesn't know I saw it."

Lando's smirk is positively devilish. "I saw it."

Lewis stares at both of them. "And none of this ever made you jealous? Protective?"

Lando shrugs. "I don't need to be. She chose me."

Lily smiles at that, soft, private, the kind of smile you only save for the person who gets your quietest thoughts.

Lewis exhales. "You two are gonna kill me."

Lando offers him a juice box like a peace offering.

Lily pulls out her phone and starts typing, eyes flicking between the boys. "I'm gonna tell Pierre you're onto him."

"Don't you dare," Lando says, practically lunging for her phone.

She laughs and darts around the kitchen island, out of reach. "I'm gonna say Lewis noticed!"

"Traitor," Lewis grins.

Lily grins wider. "You love it."

And honestly? He does.

The afternoon sun had shifted, casting warm honey-coloured light through the penthouse windows, soft against the bone-white walls and gauzy curtains that moved in the gentle Monaco breeze. The kitchen had become a sort of lounge—glasses half-full, lunch plates forgotten, the three of them sunk into casual conversation as if this wasn't the biggest celebrity reveal of the year.

Lewis sat back in the barstool, swirling the last bit of juice in his glass, his eyes shifting between Lily and Lando with the faintest smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"So..." he started slowly, eyes narrowing slightly. "Do you even know any of the other drivers?"

Lily cocked her head, a soft smile playing on her lips. "I know who they are," she said, leaning her elbow on the counter and resting her chin in her hand. "Like... I could match names to faces if I needed to. But that's about it."

Lewis raised a brow. "Really?"

"I've seen them in pictures," she shrugged. "On Lando's phone. In the news. On the F1 Instagram when I'm bored. I don't follow the sport, but I hear the names a lot."

Lewis looked amused. "So you're telling me you're dating a Formula One driver and have no idea where anyone sits on the championship board?"

"I don't even know what that means," Lily said, grinning.

Lando just grinned wider, sipping from his glass. "It's kind of our thing."

Lewis chuckled, but then his face shifted slightly, a new question forming. He tapped the edge of his glass. "So... I'm assuming the man's hand that keeps showing up in your Instagram pictures—the one people always say is Jude's?"

He paused, narrowing his eyes. "That's Lando's, right?"

There was a beat of silence. Then chaos.

Lando barked a laugh and Lily snorted, nearly spilling her drink.

Lewis blinked. "Wait what?"

Lily leaned back against her stool, still laughing. "Ninety percent of the time? Yeah. It's Lando."

"And the other ten percent?" Lewis asked, eyes wide.

"Jude," Lando said, way too casually.

Lewis gawked. "I'm sorry?"

"It's funny," Lily said, still smirking. "You should see the fan theories."

"People genuinely think I'm still seeing Jude," she added, a bit more thoughtfully. "Which, like, fair enough. We used to date. And he's still around."

Lewis opened his mouth. Closed it. Then opened it again. "So... let me get this straight. You're dating Lando. But your ex is the guy most people think you're dating."

"Yep," Lando said, popping the 'p'.

"And you're cool with that?"

Lando shrugged like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "He's one of my best friends."

Lewis looked like his brain was short-circuiting. "That's not weird to you?"

"No," Lily and Lando said in perfect unison.

Lewis ran a hand down his face, laughing. "Why?"

Lily gave him a smile, softer now. "Because it wasn't love, Lewis."

Lewis paused, attention caught.

"I was seventeen," she said. "Jude was sweet. Familiar. We were both young, both travelling, both suddenly rich and confused and kind of lonely. It was comfort more than anything."

"You guys dated for, what? Two years?" Lando offered.

"Just under," Lily nodded. "We were in love with the idea of love. Not each other."

"There was no betrayal," Lando added, reaching over to tuck a loose strand of Lily's hair behind her ear. "No drama. They just... grew out of it."

Lily nodded. "We talked. We agreed. We stayed friends."

Lewis frowned, still chewing on it.

"And then what?" he asked. "You met Lando?"

"Other way round," Lando smiled. "I met her while they were still dating."

Lewis blinked again. "What?"

"I was the weird third wheel friend," Lando said with a grin. "She sat at my table in a coffee shop because there were no seats left, and we talked for hours. I met Jude through her."

Lewis leaned forward. "Wait. So- hang on. You started as just friends?"

Lily nodded. "For a year."

"We shared an apartment," Lando said. "Still not dating."

"And Jude was okay with that?"

"He loved it," Lily shrugged. "It gave us all a break. Me and Lando were like siblings for a while. Movie nights, grocery runs, too many coffees. It was easy."

Lewis tried to imagine it: Lily and Lando doing laundry together, fighting over the aux, walking through London with iced oat lattes. The quiet kind of intimacy. Not sexual. Not yet. Just warm and inevitable.

"And now?" he asked, still stunned. "Jude just... hangs out here?"

Lando nodded. "All the time."

"Stays here sometimes," Lily added. "He's got a toothbrush and everything."

"And you're cool with that?"

Lando gave him a look. "Lewis. If I couldn't trust her with Jude, I wouldn't be dating her."

Lily smiled, all soft fondness. "And Jude's loyal. He's never once overstepped."

Lewis was quiet for a second, watching them. Watching the way they talked about their friends like family, like pieces of their own hearts. Like they were all stitched together in ways most people wouldn't understand.

"Okay," Lewis said finally, sitting back. "That's actually kind of... beautiful."

Lando grinned. "Told you."

"And what? You all hang out? You, Jude, Lily?"

"And Pablo. And Lila. And Barbara," Lily said, counting on her fingers again.

"Sleepovers. Dinners. Couch pileups," Lando added.

Lewis just shook his head, incredulous. "And no one's ever caught on?"

"Why would they?" Lily smiled. "They're all looking in the wrong direction."

Lewis stared at them. At Lando, the golden boy with the quiet grin and the billion-dollar girlfriend curled into his space like she was made to fit there. At Lily, barefoot and radiant in her boyfriend's oversized clothes, looking at Lando like she knew exactly where her heart lived. He'd been in the penthouse for two hours and he already felt like he'd wandered into a secret world. A kingdom made of espresso mugs and silk sheets and loyalty so intense it wrapped around you like gravity.

"You two are unreal," he said finally.

Lily leaned her head on Lando's shoulder. "We know."

The afternoon had settled into that soft golden lull of early evening, where time felt suspended and everything slowed. Lewis was still digesting, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, when Lily stood up and offered, so casually, "Wanna see the rest of the place?"

Lewis blinked, glass still in hand, as Lando tossed him a knowing smirk across the kitchen island.

"I mean, yeah," Lewis said, standing. "If you're sure I'm allowed."

Lily laughed, already padding toward the hallway barefoot, her oversized McLaren shirt swishing around her thighs. "You're cleared. You've had gnocchi and the reveal. Might as well see the whole damn circus."

Lando stayed behind, sipping his drink and telling Lewis he'd be in the living room if they needed him. "Try not to fall in love with her," he added as Lewis followed Lily down the hallway. "Happens to everyone."

"I'll try," Lewis muttered under his breath, though he wasn't entirely joking.

The hallway was bright and wide, skylights letting in slanted sunbeams. Marble floors, soft rugs, art lining the walls, some of it framed sketches of runway looks, some of it minimalist pieces that probably cost more than Lewis' entire wardrobe.

Lily glanced back at him. "Okay, so first thing you should know, we technically have two living rooms."

"Two?"

"Yeah," she said with a smile. "One for Lando's online presence. One for mine."

Lewis laughed. "Smart."

"It was the only way to post content without people realising we were in the same space 24/7," she explained. "Different colour schemes, different backgrounds. If you're really paying attention, you'll catch it. But most people are too distracted by my legs or Lando's hair."

Lewis chuckled as she led him into one of the living rooms, a warm-toned, subtly glamorous space with papaya-orange accents, soft lighting, and a framed photo of Lando mid-laugh on the shelf next to a Chanel candle.

"This is the one I post from," she said.

Then they walked through a small archway and stepped into a second living room, cool-toned, sleek, all muted greys and baby blues with a floor-to-ceiling window that bathed everything in light. A clean white corner couch, a glass coffee table, a neon sign that read "No WiFi, Talk to Me."

Lewis smiled. "This feels very you."

"It's all curated," she said. "Deliberately so. We wanted the apartment to feel lived in without ever making it obvious who lives in it."

Back into the hallway, and then she gestured to the doors as they passed.

"Guest room one, guest room two, guest room three..."

He stopped walking, brow raised. "How many guest rooms do you have?"

"Six."

"Six."

Lily just smirked. "Everyone stays over. A lot."

She pushed open a door to reveal a rich jewel-toned room, velvet emeralds, dark woods, plush bedding, a single floor lamp casting buttery light over a gold-framed photo of her and Lila Moss at Cannes.

"This one's Lila's favourite," she said. "She calls it the sulk cave."

They moved on. Room after room, each styled with its own vibe. One with pink walls and perfume bottles. One with framed Vogue covers and an open minibar. Another with a record player, Billie Holiday vinyls, and a ridiculous number of blankets.

"You can pick whichever one you want if you ever stay over," she said as they passed the sixth guest room.

"Noted," Lewis said, still spinning.

She stopped in front of a closed door. "Okay. Now for the real magic."

She opened it and stepped aside for him to walk in.

Lando's gaming room.

The air felt cooler in here, softly air-conditioned. The first thing Lewis noticed was how big it was,massive, honestly, bigger than most people's living rooms. And the second thing? How insanely equipped it was.

"Jesus Christ," Lewis muttered, stepping inside.

Against the far wall was a triple-monitor setup, curved screens glowing faint blue, a mic boom arm mounted like a crane, a pro-level camera angled perfectly. A mechanical keyboard that looked like it came from a spaceship. RGB lights pulsing under the desk like a heartbeat. A gaming chair clearly designed by an aerospace engineer. And to the right—a full F1 racing sim rig, complete with a custom McLaren-branded wheel and pedals that looked stolen from a real garage.

Lily leaned against the wall, arms crossed, smiling.

"That setup alone probably costs what, twenty grand?"

"Closer to thirty," she said casually. "It's got a cooling system and custom wiring. It's his favourite room."

Lewis walked toward the wall of helmets next. It stretched from floor to ceiling, clear glass cabinetry backlit with soft warm LEDs. Every helmet Lando had raced in since karting days. Some marked with scuffs. One with Lily's initials scrawled on the back in tiny silver ink.

He took a step closer. The cabinet was immaculate. No dust. Spaced evenly. Labelled discreetly with little cards.

"You did this," Lewis said without turning.

Lily shrugged from behind him. "He didn't ask me to. I just knew he wouldn't do it himself."

Lewis looked up at the trophies next. A full wall, some major, some smaller, all shined to mirror finish. His eyes caught on one tucked between the bigger ones: a third-place karting trophy, cracked slightly at the base.

"I wanted to throw that one away," Lando's voice called softly from the doorway.

Lewis turned. Lando was leaning against the frame, arms crossed, smiling faintly.

"But she said it mattered," Lando added. "Said if I got rid of the early stuff, I'd forget how hard it was to get here."

Lewis looked back at the little broken trophy.

"Good call," he said.

Lily beamed.

[rinsnumber1fan]

It's my first time doing this so I'm a little shy PLEASE DO NOT LAUGH AT ME🥀🥀🥀😭😭😭🙏🙏 Soooo may I request a Nagi x reader angst fic^^;;? So hear me out Nagi and User r in an relationship and the user died by yk.....hanging...🌚. And Nagi became depressed since of course User was his significant other and Reo had a difficult time cheering his ass up for 7 months which wasn't working. It was not until User's little brother(u can name him whatever u like💜) messaged Nagi in his phone and confessed to Nagi that he was the one who killed user by pushing the user down the stairs because of an Argument, and how Nagi would react?(If you know this reference... From a certain game.)

[THANK U FOR THIS IDEA BIHH ILY SM IDK WHICH GAME ITS FROM THO-]

The room was dark, and nagis eyes had different colored lights illuminating them. His PC light reflected against his iris, eyes wide as he glanced at the screen infront of him. Mouth slightly parted. Someone had texted him using your account, after a text he had sent,

"I'm sorry but the person you are trying to reach can't talk right now"

Nagis brows furrowed, he typed furiously against his keyboard, fast.

"Who is this?"

Typing..

And then stopped.

And then typing again..

"She's dead."

The text sent a cold shiver in his spine. He thinks it's a prank, he thinks its a joke. The corner of his eye twitches.

"I know it's you"

He typed, keyboard sounds echoing in the dark room.

"it would be better for me if you didn't believe me."

And then blocked.

Nagi knew you pull off some dumb pranks sometimes, some bullshit that's a big hassle with that big smile of yours, but you blocked him?

Nagi didn't notice when his eyes started to water. When was it that I started to care about her so much?

He didn't think twice, he got off his gaming chair, letting it roll away, he grabs his phone, trying to reach out to your Instagram, Snapchat, WhatsApp everything he ever had of yours. He ran out his house, still in his school uniform which he didn't bother changing all so that he could text you first and ask you for how your day was.

Its some dumb prank.

He ran outside, he knew you lived only a few blocks away so he has to go see you. His shoes pressed against the rock hard surface of the road, faster than before. He looked left and right frantically, and he spot your house. He ran there wiping his tears away which dared to spill. He knocked quickly.

For a while nobody opened the door, his breath speed up, and then appeared your mother standing behind the door, with bloodshot eyes, hair curly and unruly, she looked up at the man with ivory locks.

"You are.." she murmured, almost recognising the man. Till she fell to her knees and nagi immidiently realized. "She took her life." Her mother cried, hands resting on the ground as tears fell down her eyes to the floor. His expression scrunched up. His eyes went down looking at her on her knees, she had seen him before even teased you about it when you told her to stop with red cheeks.

Nagis mouth was slightly open. He didnt remember what it was last like to lose someone who he cherished. And somehow he didnt realise how much you meant to him untill you were gone., and he hadnt seen you ever since since.

He thought he knew you. He thought he knew how sweet you were. How you cared for everyone. How you sticked with him even if he never took care of himself. How you'd cook him breakfast and force him to get him early with you for a walk outside. He thought he knew you, but after this ? He came to the conclusion that, No, he didn't know you. He never knew you truly.

7 MONTHS LATER:

Nagi had not moved on.

He hadn't moved an inch, infact.

He would rot in his bed all day, trash cans had started growing in his house, unhealthy packets of chips and TV shows playing in the bagorund which he didn't bother closing either. The remote was too far away and he'd want to watch it later.

Reo had tried to help, he really did, reo tried to help nagi by cleaning up his room or making someone do it and then nagi would just cry in reos lap all day while reo would try his best to push nagi outside and touch some damn grass.

He shifted in his bed, his phone lit up, the text shining blue and the random colors of his wallpaper. His brows relaxed, unrelated. Its a message from an unknown number.

"You've been pathetic."

Nagi stared at the message for a moment, and almost decided to ignore it. Untill another message popped up.

"Not answering to this is just proof"

Nagi hated hassles. But he clicked on the notification anyway.

"Who"

Is all he texted, his screen lit up again.

"I'm [y/n]s little brother."

His eyes lit up for a moment at the mention of your name. He gulps, thumb pacing over the keyboard going up and down before deciding what to say.

"You shouldve said so earlier"

Nagi finally texted back to him. But he had other ideas.

"I killed her."

Nagi stared into silence, his heart dropped for a moment considering the possibility with his phone in his hands. His brows furrowed.

"That's not funny"

"You cant joke about someone else's death"

Nagi replied, he thought he took the first step to being a good person because he didn't crash out on this boy.

"I didn't mean to."

"It was an accident"

Nagis lips pressed against eachother and he shook his head.

"Stop lying."

"I wish I was lying."

Nagi throws his phone away. Actually. It hits the corner of his room, and he gets out of bed. And runs out, he tried to open the locked door of your house which wouldn't open.

Man, fuck it.

Nagi used whatever of that sleeper build he had left and punched throw the door. The hole allowed him to turn the knob open and he rushed inside. It's empty, dark, your mother sulks in the corner, completely out depressed.

She doesn't even seem to notice Nagi.

Nagi runs to wherever he can find him, yournlittle brother. And when he does?

It's over for him.

THIS WAS SO FUN OMGGGGG I feel like nagi would almost beat the shit out of the little brother untill he stops for a moment and thinks.. what would she think if she saw me this way?

Idk what reference this is from, I'm sorry I THINK ITS FROM OMORI?? IDK but I wrote what I canoned. Lol. Hope you enjoyed.

[radk3]

INTRO POST !!

Howdy I'm Alex ( but you can also call me Andy )

I use he / they !!!

I'm an incredibly silly little guy :3 I'm 7teen, autistic and have ADHD, my birthday is 10/30 btw!!!! :3

My main interests are. Music, Video Games, Animation, religion/religious history, forensics, psychology, criminology, Creepypasta and the occult :3

No DNI or BYF :3

PLEASE DM ME I NEED MORE FRIENDS :>

SOME of but not all my favorite bands are.

Falling in Reverse, Ice Nine Kills, Fall Out Boy, Wage War, Shinedown, My Chemical Romance, Bowling For Soup, Panic! At The Disco, Escape the Fate, Marilyn Manson, Green Day and Rammstein!!

My favorite genres are. Metalcore, Post-Hardcore, Pop Punk, Alternative Rock, Alternative metal and Pop Rock :3

I LOVE music recs!!! Don't be afraid to give any!!!

My FAVE musicians. Ronnie Radke, Patrick Stump, Brendon Urie, Gerard Way, Billie Joe Armstrong, Spencer Charnas, Marilyn Manson, Craig Mabbitt and Øystein Aarseth

Fave shows :3

Dan vs, Smiling Friends, Camp Camp, Ghost stories ( the English dub ), Sonic Boom, OK KO, South Park, Gumball, Phineas and Ferb, Scott Pilgrim Takes Off ( best show of 2023 )

Fave games :3

Pokemon, Sonic, Animal Crossing, Minecraft, Brawl Stars, Cookie run, Cult Of The Lamb, Yo Kai Watch, Smash Bros, Mario Kart, Mario Maker, Paper Mario, Kirby, FNF

Fave movies :3

Lords of Chaos, Heathers, Heavy Trip, The Sonic Trilogy ( the 3rd was the best movie of 2024 ), Detective Pikachu, the OG Lilo and Stitch, Jennifer's body, The Cabin In The Woods, the Terrifier trilogy, Scott Pilgrim vs The World

Fave youtubers

Midnight krick, Alpharad, Point crow, Crustbag, Gearisko, Liam Donovan, PJ Trash, Doobus Goobus, Uhyeah, LSuperSonicQ, Scott The Woz, One Topic At a Time, Oddheader,

Fave creepypasta

Penpal, Ben Drowned, 1999, Candle Cove, Anansi's Goatman story, Abandoned by Disney, Wii Deleted you, Normal Porn for Normal People, The Russian Sleep Experiment, Gateway Of The Mind

Coolest ppl of all time

@hatsunecalvin @poorlilthn @nuthouse1999 @drunkonvodkaaaaaa @t1lver @iwuvcannibalism @shooterrkiid @jellycho @vodkasnutsdippedinglitter @xxstr4y-bull3txx @wingdingslawl @sunnydaze081 sorry if I don't mention you I can only think of these ppl....but all my moots are equally awesome!!!!! :3

[wanderingmind867]

Nico scowled. "It's none of your business, but I don't belong. That's obvious. No one wants me. I'm a child of -" "Oh, please." Will sounded unusually angry. "Nobody at Camp Half-Blood ever pushed you away. You have friends - or at least, people who would like to be your friend. You pushed yourself away. If you'd get your head out of that brooding cloud of yours for once -"

Ohh. Okay. Wanna play that game, huh!? Wanna victim blame the character I project onto!? No! No, how fucking dare you! Nico did not push himself away! He didn't necessarily reach out, but other people could have reached out! Instead they ostracised him! They made him feel unwelcome! As did you, I bet! So take your smug attitude and get out of here, william solace! You stupid victim blaming jerk! You have no right to speak for another person's experiences! Fuck you!

This is actually hurting to read. Because it feels like someone telling me: "oh, by the way? Remember how you have no friends besides your dad? Yeah, that's your own fault, actually." And that hurts. If anyone said that to me in real life, I would cry. Cry and then want to kill them. And is this meant to be the big romantic moment between Will and Nico? If so, wow. This is possibly the least romantic thing ever, and I think I now understand why some people hate solangelo. In time, maybe i'll forgive and forget. But this struck a nerve. So fuck you, Will Solace. And an extra fuck you to Rick Riordan, who wrote this victim blaming trash.

PS: I wrote this at school earlier. I'm just gonna say sorry right now. I shouldn't have said curse words and gotten so mad, but it struck a nerve. It struck a big, big nerve. So I had to stop reading and write this long, angry vent in my phone's notes app. There's some more posts like this incoming. Just as a warning.

[oh-no-its-bird]

Look all I'm saying is that if I were going to make a minecraft movie.

Well, first off I'd put down the first person to even reccomend we do it in cgi. Not just because it looks objectively terrible and half of the magic and nostalgia factor of minecraft is in its texture but holy shit budget much??? You are literally looking at a situation where the cheaper option is also objectively the better option. What the fuck are you doing

But I mean, after that.

Second off, all my writers must watch popular smps and minecraft roleplays/let's plays to understand the "magic" of the game. That's how we're studying for this, not the game books or whatever. Those guys are clearly doing smthn right, and as the executive/writer who knows very little about mineraft that I am in this hypothetical scenario, I need to do my best to make money. And that means learning what people like about the game and community.

Maybe even bring on some popular (non controversial please god) smp writers for consulting. They literally make minecraft movies as their fucking job, they are the expert u need to consult

Story wise, you NEED to choose if you wanna play this straight or silly. I'm so sick of movies trying to be all emotional and "ohh this world is so beautiful,, if u could only understand,, woaa" with their epic sound track and dramatic lighting, but then the dialogue being ripped out of a stupid marvel knockoff trying too hard to be witty

Anyways. Give me a generic "kid has a hard life and uses [thing] to escape it but then their parent trashes [thing] to teach them a "lesson"" movie.

The thing is minecraft and this kid is totally in love with letsplays and smps and has a server with their online friends (get a sponsorship from discord for that good good film sponsorship money, have them play while in call)

The mom or dad or maybe both trash the kids computer for some reason (bad grades maybe or one of those shitty "you need to talk to us more!!! That computer is killing ur brain!!! You don't love us as much as you should and it's that damn games fault!!!" But like it's actually just a kid being a normal fucking kid and having normal fucking kid hobbies things and the parents are dicks)

They delete the minecraft world rip

Them boom, kid somehow gets stuck in the game

Switch to NON CGI FILMING IN MINECRAFT. If you really need to add your stupid shitty fucking cgi then at least make it look like an ACTUAL MINECRAFT ANIMATION holy shit

It'll save us so much money too

So main plot is this kid, being trapped in minecraft, actually falling through different minecraft servers.

We can have different cameos from popular smps and youtubers, get some old youtubers and gameplay in here too. Get fucking dantdm and the diamond minecarts og series with the lab thing, it'll make the old fans lose their fucking MINDS.

The youtubers themselves don't even have to show up, just shove the kid into settings that are clear references to smps and letsplays. Have them wander through Aphmau's OG minecraft diaries sets or Sundee's lucky block series

The best part is that as backdrops, you don't even have to fully commit to "you'll only get this/find this interesting if you know these guys" bc if your writing is good enough you can still make people care by just. Introducing it correctly. Don't present it as "Aphmau's old minecraft diaries series world" go "oh wow look st this cool village,, woah I wonder who built this ,," And have them interact with NPCs organically

Meanwhile the parents go into the game after the kid to bring them back and we do this whole world hopping adventure where the parents learn that,, minecraft can be fun? Actually?

They find the kid and the kid is like "nooo I'm having too much fun the real world SUCKS!!!" but then we do that "it's cool to have fun and indulge but you still need to be present in the real world and do real people things too in order to have that fun responsibly" where somehow the kid realizes that moderation is good for u.

Maybe they almost die in game fr fr? Every world they enter has its difficulty upped a little bit till they enter *gasp* a hardcore world (oh no)

So like the kid learns that you can't just lock yourself in the room and wish the world goes away while you play minecraft for 12 hours straight, and the parents learn that minecraft is cool and fun and can be a good outlet and outlets are important for adults and children alike. And also that they totally pulled a dick move and they need to try to understand their kid instead of just demanding the kid understands them

Somewhere along the way, the kid ends up in their friends server and the friends help to pull them out of the game w the parents

We end the movie with the kid making an effort to be more present with the parents, and the parents also making an effort to interact with the kid in ways that they know the kid will enjoy and respond well to— shown a family dinner scene where the kid very eagerly eats their food while talking about school, then they all go to play minecraft together

The end <3

Oh right and if you seriously want Jack Black there so fucking bad then make him either the dad or like. School computer teacher who helps the kid use Minecraft EU to learn science (shows off that some schools use minecraft for education purposes) who also helps the kids friends pull them and the parents out of the game

Overall, lots of themes not just about how the game is cool and can let you do cool shit, but also about how the community is cool, and how it's provided so many kids and adults outlets to express themselves and have fun together

That's how you do a game movie

Anyways yeah, minecraft movie looks shit. Hire me instead next time

[sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes]

Virgil: ...is this what cam girls feel like?

Remus: I feel like cam girls do a liiiitle more then we did

Virgil: well at least they get paid, we had to flirt with that weirdo for free!

Remus: No, we lost a bet, that's not free, it's just hoeing for a bono

Virgil: why would you even put up flirting with Wrath in the first place?

Remus: oh, so you thought he could steal that hotdog roller?

Virgil: NO- IT'S JUST- ugh, that whole video we recorded yesterday- "oh Wrath your villain introduction was so cool-" ew!

Remus: that wasn't even the worst part, the everyone had to watch us do that!

Virgil: plus he probably won't leave me alone for like a month now, he's gonna go home to his video games and make create-a-characters of us.

Remus: yeah he'll kill us in Grand Theft Auto

Virgil: you can make characters in Grand Theft Auto?

Remus: do I look like a bitch who would know?

Virgil: whatever, God I need a Xanax- wait where'd I put i- BITCH THAT WAS MY LAST XAN, HOW'D YOU TAKE THAT?!

Remus: quick hands. Man tiddy and Xanax, what a combo!

Virgil: goes together like peanut butter and Percocet...

Remus: "this is true"

Virgil: oh yeah, he kept doing that! "This is true"

Remus: like he's too good to say "yeah" he has to be a scientist about it

Virgil: heh- and- and what about "ummm okaaay?"

Remus: I HATE it when they do that! Like they have to sound like the gay comic relief cat in every Disney movie

Virgil: "this is true"

Remus: "this is true!"

Virgil: "yes in fact!"

Remus: "quite in interesting outfit!"

Virgil: "stop screaming we're having sex!"

Janus: what are you doing?

V + R: UH-

Janus: sounds like you had a run-in with Wrath

Virgil: what the fuck do you wa- oh he has McDonald's- Janus where'd you get McDonald's?!

Janus: ...McDonald's?

Virgil: bitch gimme a fry!

Janus: IS THAT HOW YOU ASK?!

Virgil: BITCH PLEASE GIVE ME A FRY!

Remus: and yeah we saw Wrath

Janus: me too, I could tell. He was drawing pictures of you guys when I saw him!

Virgil, mouth full: no way

Remus: what were we doing in the pictures?

Janus: like... Being cute, making kissy faces with hearts around it...

Virgil: Remus, we're gonna get murdered! We're gonna get murdered by a guy who can't even tie his fucking shoes!

Remus: well at least he can't torture us, can't tie a rope either

Janus: yeah, but I ripped them up and threw them in the trash, told that hoe to watch it.

Remus: you're the best, Janus

Janus: I know. Okay, I'm gonna go flirt with Patton, see you guys later

Remus: ...he's like the honest bitch ever

Virgil: eugh, I guess... ...

Virgil: ... ...What's gayer, dating a guy or wanting your sworn enemy to have sex with your dead body?

Remus: hmmm... Dating a guy? The second's kinda like using a fleshlight I guess

Virgil: okay... Still could be gayer...

Remus: what were we talking about... Oh yeah, so what are we doing for this next Sanders Asides?

Virgil: it's the movie casting thing right?

Remus: yeah- yeah, so I was thinking-

*BANG*

Virgil: WH-

Remus: I think the AC exploded again

Virgil: god that scared me- okay, sorry, continue

Remus: the challenge should be a cast of bald guys who DON'T look like they say the n-word

Virgil: how is that a challenge?

Remus: name one.

Virgil: Vin Diese- no, wait... Bruce Willi- wow, this is challenging!

*BANG* *BANG*

Virgil: damn, that's alot of AC units...

*buzz*

Virgil: oh wait, that's my phone... Huh, I just got a voice message from Logan.

Logan: hello Virgil, I'm just calling to inform you that the mindscape's on emergency lockdown. Please follow procedures at this time.

Remus: what the fuck was that about?

*BANG* *BANG* *SCREAMING*

Remus: is that...

Virgil, standing up, voice doubling: Wrath's snapped, we gotta get out of here!

Remus: huh...

Virgil: what are you doing?! Let's go!

Remus: we flirted with him yesterday, we're the last people he'd kill, just chill out.

Virgil: THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY, YOU TOOK MY LAST XANAX! *runs off*

Remus:

*BANG*

Remus:

*BANG*

Virgil: *slowly sits back down*

Remus: I thought you were running for it?

Virgil: security locked the doors...

*BANG*

Virgil: oh my God-

Remus: damn that was a big one!

Wrath in the distance: "TOOK TOO LONG TO APPEAR" YOU SAY?! WERE THE BACKGROUND HINTS AND GLOWING EYES NOT ENOUGH?! WHO ELSE WANTS SOME, HUH?! HUH?!

Virgil: ...is this how the series ends?

[mochasenby]

𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚂𝚎𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚄𝚜

Valeria x F! Reader She’s your obsessive ex. You broke up with her after a harsh realization that she would literally kill for you. She’s been sending you flowers for months to win you back over. She won’t stop till she has you in her arms or beneath her.

Tags: face-sitting, cunnilingus, strap-on use

"You fucker!" Y/n snapped as the men roughly dragged her into the warehouse. Her body ached from the rough rope that wrapped around her limbs, immobilizing her from running away. Cold metal jammed harshly against her spine, making her wince.

"Watch your tone, bitch." A man snapped at her, forcing the gun to drag against her skin. Y/n yelped in pain, looking over her shoulder to glare at him. How did it end up like this?

Hours ago, Y/n stood alone in her kitchen, glaring at the bouquet on her counter—another bundle of red roses. She knew who sent them; she didn't even have to glance at the notecard. They were beautiful, in full bloom despite the harsh winter storm that brewed outside.

She grabbed the stems, noticing that each thorn had been meticulously twisted off except for one.

She quickly drew her hand back, cursing as a thorn pricked her palm. "Fuck." She hissed, snatching the bouquet and tossing it into the trash along with the rest. She grabbed the notecard, preparing to toss it, but paused.

She stared down at the gold ink, her thumb tracing over each detail. With a heavy sigh of defeat, she turned it over. But just before she could read whatever devotion of love and worship was written on it, a loud whack echoed as she fell to the floor.

Her vision blurred, and the last thing she saw was a pair of boots that looked all too similar to a particular war criminal.

And that's how she ended up here, arms bound together with itchy rope that was so close to cutting off her circulation. And a pounding headache that made her want to shriek. She glared at the bald man who held her captive, wishing death upon him and his next of kin for generations.

Just before she could tell him off, a bullet flew through the air, lodging into the man's shoulder. It happened so quickly that Y/n could barely process it. Her eyes nearly bulged out of her head as she stared in horror at the man. He writhed in agony on the ground, his hand cupping his oozing shoulder.

"Who do you think you are, pendejo? You think this is a game?" A hiss echoed as Y/n's heart raced. She knew that tone all too well.

"Valeria." Y/n whispered breathlessly as Valeria appeared from the shadows, gun in hand, and her eyes blazed with malice.

Valeria stepped closer, pressing the heel of her boot into the man's head. "Apologize, hijo de puta, or I'll blow your brains out." She uttered, moving the gun to tap against his cheek.

The man gritted his teeth before his eyes darted to Y/n. "I'm sorry."

A click echoed as Valeria moved to point the gun between his eyes. His body stiffened as he quickly scrambled onto his knees.

"Sorry! I'm so sorry! Please forgive me, El Sin Nombre!" He pleaded desperately as she scoffed.

"Get the fuck out." She hissed as the man scrambled off the floor, darting out of the warehouse alongside the rest of her men.

Valeria rolled her eyes, stuffing the gun into her hip pocket. Y/n watched in disbelief, her jaw agape. "What the fuck?" She whispered as Valeria's attention turned to her.

The malice quickly vanished, only to be filled with longing and adoration.

"Mi Vida," Valeria cooed, reaching to cup Y/n's face. Y/n flinched back, her body defensive from her touch.

"Valeria, what the fuck. Do you know how fucking crazy you are? Why the fuck did you kidnap me?!" She shouted in anger.

Valeria seemed unaffected by her words, the adoration in her eyes only shining brighter.

"You know exactly why, mi amor," Valeria uttered, her voice laced with desire and possessiveness.

"How long must this game of cat and mouse continue when I can just do this?" She reached out, her hand finally resting on Y/n's face.

A shudder ran down Y/n's spine. "Valeria, this isn't right. It's over between us."

Valeria's grip tightened on Y/n's chin, her eyes narrowing as she leaned in closer, her breath brushing against Y/n's lips.

"No, mi amor, it's far from over," she whispered, her voice laced with determination. "You think you can walk away from me? Think again."

“You’re fucking crazy,” Y/n whispered, her harsh words causing Valeria's eyes to start to fill with annoyance.

“You killed a man without any regrets right in front of me, and you expect me to forget it ever happened?” Y/n uttered as Valeria tapped her lips.

"Regrets?" Valeria laughed, her voice dripping with venom. "That man meant nothing to me, mi amor. I did what I had to do to protect what's ours."

Her fingers trailed along Y/n jawline, her touch simultaneously gentle and possessive. "I killed for you, Y/n. I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe, even if it means getting my hands dirty."

Y/n stared at her in horror. She knew deep down that Valeria's love came with a dark side that frightened her. Valeria's love was obsessive. Valeria's love had no end to it. And she just happened to fall into Valeria's web. But no matter how far Y/n tried to run or how hard she struggled, she trapped herself even more.

The pull Valeria had on her was intoxicating. And something about the crazed look in her eyes made Y/n shudder. And Valeria knew it.

"You call me crazy, but look who's responding to my touch?" Valeria uttered, her hand moving to cup the base of Y/n's neck. She could feel the beats of Y/n's heart, how it raced from each glide of her fingers.

"Sabes que no puedes dejarme." Valeria cooed in her ear, her grip on Y/n's neck tightening just enough to make her gasp.

"You still want me," Valeria whispered as her gaze met Y/n's. Y/n stared at her with frustration and anger, yet hidden behind was want. As Valeria's lips brushed over her ear, she shuddered. The possessive grip she had on her neck made her knees almost buckle.

When was the last time they had been this close?

"I fucking hate you," Y/n spat, her hiss weak as Valeria's lips twitched upwards.

"No por mucho tiempo."

Y/n grunted as she was shoved, her back colliding with the mattress. The rope that still bound her arms ground against the bed, making her groan in pain. She stared up at Valeria with fierce eyes as Valeria straddled her thighs.

With a swift motion, Valeria reached down, her fingers deftly undoing the restraints that bound Y/n's hands.

"Now, mi amor," Valeria's voice dripped with authority, "Show me just how much you hate me." She mocked as Y/n's eye twitched.

"Bitch." Y/n whispered before she reached up, her hands gripping the edge of Valeria's shirt. Their lips crashed together in a passionate clash, a battle of dominance and desire.

It was a battle that Y/n quickly lost as Valeria kept her pinned beneath her. One of Valeria's hands wrapped around Y/n's neck, squeezing firmly enough to make Y/n's head spin. Her other hand slid beneath Y/n's shirt, her fingers skimming up her stomach toward the edge of her bra.

Y/n moaned beneath her, arching up into her touch. "Valeria," Y/n whispered breathlessly.

Valeria took the opportunity to press her tongue through the gap of Y/n's lips. Their tongues glided against one another as the kiss deepened. The need to breathe grew stronger as Y/n quickly broke the kiss, panting as Valeria smirked.

With a slow, deliberate motion, Valeria's hand slid lower, tracing the curve of Y/n's waist before slipping beneath the waistband of her pants. Her fingers danced along the edge of her panties, teasingly brushing against her sensitive skin.

Y/n's breath hitched, a quiet gasp escaping her lips as she arched into Valeria's touch. Valeria's lips brushed against Y/n's ear, her voice a low, seductive whisper.

"You're mine, mi amor. Every inch of you belongs to me."

Valeria's fingers slipped past the fabric of Y/n's panties, delving into her wetness. Valeria's eyes darkened at the feeling, the slickness of Y/n's arousal coating her fingertips. She began to explore and caress with a slow, deliberate rhythm, her touch growing more insistent and demanding.

Y/n's body trembled beneath her, her moans growing louder and more desperate. "Valeria--" Y/n gasped as Valeria's thumb traced her clit.

Valeria's grip on Y/n's neck tightened slightly, a silent reminder of her control. With each stroke of her fingers, she pushed Y/n closer to the edge, her gasps and moans filling the room.

But Valeria was not satisfied with just this. She wanted to push Y/n further, to make her beg and plead for release. With a wicked smile, she withdrew her hand from between Y/n's legs, leaving her gasping and on the brink of climax.

"Valeria!" Y/n cried out in frustration as Valeria moved her fingers to her lips. She lapped the fluids that coated her fingertips, her gaze turning hungry.

Her voice dripped with seduction as she leaned in closer, her breath ghosting over Y/n's ear. "Oh, mi amor, you have no idea how delicious you taste," she whispered, her words laced with a hint of sadistic pleasure.

Y/n's breathing grew uneven, a mix of desire and anticipation coursing through her veins. Valeria's hand trailed down Y/n's body, leaving a trail of fire in its wake until it reached the apex of her thighs once again. Without warning, she plunged her fingers back into Y/n's wetness, resuming her relentless exploration.

The sensations overwhelmed Y/n, pushing her closer and closer to the edge. Her moans grew louder, her body arching against Valeria's touch.

"Please, Valeria," she whimpered, her voice laced with desperation. "I need to come."

A wicked smile played on Valeria's lips as she quickened the pace of her fingers, her movements becoming more forceful and demanding. She reveled in the power she held over Y/n, how she could bring her to the brink and deny her release.

"I thought you hated me," Valeria mocked, causing a string of curses to leave Y/n's mouth.

"You'll come when you submit to me," Valeria hissed, moving her head lower. A cry left Y/n's lips as Valeria's tongue began lapping her clit with deliberate and needy strokes.

Y/n's hips bucked upward as Valeria forcefully held them down. Her lips wrapped around her clit before pushing her tongue deep into her folds. Y/n groaned in pleasure, her body buzzing with want. She could feel herself growing closer to the edge of release, but just before she tipped over--- Valeria pulled back, licking her lips.

A frustrated cry left Y/n's lips. "Please, Valeria," she pleaded, her voice filled with desperation. "I need to come. I can't take it anymore."

Valeria's eyes darkened as she reached upwards, grabbing Y/n roughly by her neck. She yanked her closer, their bodies practically grinding against one another.

"Louder," she demanded, her voice low and commanding. "Beg for me, puta."

"Please-- Fuck I-- I just want to come. I'll stay with you and stop running away; just please let me come." Y/n begged with teary eyes.

Valeria's eyes darkened as she roughly pressed Y/n down, straddling her thighs. "You sound so needy, preciosa," She cooed, moving back to spread Y/n's legs.

"I've imagined so many different ways I could have you beneath me again, crying and begging for me," Valeria muttered, her nails tracing Y/n's thighs. Valeria moved back, her hands pulling her pants down, along with her panties.

Y/n's breath hitched as Valeria climbed on top of her, pressing her deeper against the mattress. "You want to cum, mi amor? You'll have to earn it." Valeria uttered.

Y/n stared up at Valeria before it clicked in her head. She moved back, propping herself on a pillow. She reached forward and pulled Valeria closer. Valeria smirked and raised her hips as they hovered over Y/n's face.

"Go on, prove yourself," Valeria uttered as Y/n swallowed thickly.

Without hesitation, Y/n leaned forward, her tongue darting out to flick against Valeria's clit. A hiss escaped Valeria's lips, her hands tangling in Y/n's hair.

Valeria's grip tightened in Y/n's hair, guiding her movements. Y/n surrendered herself to Valeria's control, a moan leaving her lips as Valeria yanked at her hair.

Valeria rocked her hips, grinding against Y/n's mouth. "Good girl," Valeria hissed as Y/n's tongue traced patterns. Y/n's hands gripped Valeria's thighs, holding her in place as she continued to worship her with her mouth.

"Meirda." Valeria moaned, feeling her thighs begin to tremble slightly. She looked down and let out a breathless laugh. She yanked Y/n's hair, causing a cry to leave her lips.

"Look at me," Valeria uttered as their gazes met.

"You look so pretty like this," Valeria cooed, grinding herself on Y/n's tongue. Y/n shuddered at the praise, her hands cupping Valeria's hips to pull her closer. The ache between her legs was so intense she had to fight the urge to move her hand down.

And, of course, Valeria noticed as her eyes flashed with amusement. "You don't get to touch yourself, not yet." She whispered.

Y/n whimpered at the denial, her body aching with need. Her tongue worked fervently against Valeria's throbbing clit, forcing a moan from Valeria's lips.

Valeria's movements became more urgent, her hips grinding against Y/n's mouth with a fierce intensity. She felt her climax building, the coil of pleasure tightening within her core.

"You're doing so well, mi preciosa," Valeria moaned. "Make me come; show me how much you want it."

Encouraged by Valeria's words, Y/n intensified her efforts, tongue flicking and swirling with a newfound determination. She could feel Valeria's grip on her hair tighten further, her moans growing louder and more desperate.

And then, with a shuddering gasp, Valeria's orgasm crashed over her. Her body trembled, her walls clenching around Y/n's tongue as waves of pleasure washed over her. Y/n panted heavily as Valeria raised her hips, allowing her the oxygen to return to her lungs.

Yet as soon as she got it, the air in her lungs seemed to vanish as Valeria reached into the dresser next to them and pulled out a strap-on.

"Oh." The only word left her lips as Valeria grabbed and yanked her closer. Valeria smirked, her eyes darkening with hunger as she fastened the strap-on securely around her hips.

Valeria moved closer, her hands caressing Y/n's thighs, spreading them wide open. Her fingers danced along the slick folds, teasing and testing Y/n's readiness.

"You look so pretty beneath me," Valeria uttered before pressing the strap tip in. Y/n let out a choked moan, her eyes widening at the intrusion.

Her eyes fluttered shut, her body convulsing in painful pleasure as their hips slotted together.

"Open your eyes," Valeria hissed, pulling out slowly before setting a rough pace.

Y/n quickly obeyed as tears began rolling down her cheeks. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure coursing through Y/n's body, her moans growing louder and more desperate with each passing moment. The room was filled with the sounds of their bodies colliding and the echo of Y/n's wails.

Y/n's nails clawed into the sheets, her body arching to meet Valeria's thrusts, craving more. "V-Valeria!" She sobbed as Valeria's hand connected with her neck once more. The sensation of being filled and stretched by Valeria's strap-on was overwhelming, pushing her closer and closer to the edge.

She squeezed before bringing their faces closer together. "You can't ever leave me, my love," She whispered before crashing their lips together.

Valeria's pace quickened, her thrusts growing more forceful and demanding. Y/n's body trembled with each thrust, her pleasure mounting with each passing second. She could feel the coil of ecstasy tightening within her, the need for release growing unbearable.

"Valeria," she gasped, breaking the kiss. "Please, let me come. I can't-- I can't do it anymore--"

Valeria's grip tightened on Y/n's hips, her thrusts becoming more relentless. "Beg for it."

Y/n's body ached with both pleasure and frustration, her desperate pleas filling the room. She begged and pleaded for Valeria to grant her release, her voice filled with raw need.

Valeria's eyes gleamed with a mix of satisfaction and control as she continued to thrust into Y/n. But as the intensity of their connection grew, Valeria could feel her climax building. The coil of pleasure within her grew tighter, driving her closer to the brink.

With a final thrust, Valeria couldn't hold back any longer. She let out a moan of Y/n's name, her orgasm crashing over her in waves of ecstasy. The sight and sound of Valeria finding her release was enough to push Y/n over the edge.

Y/n's body tensed, pleasure consuming her as her orgasm washed over her in a powerful wave. She cried out Valeria's name, her voice a mix of ecstasy and satisfaction. They stilled for a few moments as Y/n panted heavily.

Tears were still streaming down her face as she felt Valeria's hand wipe them away.

"Nothing could ever separate us, Y/n." She uttered, leaning closer to press their lips together once more.

"Aún en la muerte, siempre serás mía."

[koosluvss]

01: the world was on fire and no one could save me but you

series m.list

—hii guys!! im sorry for leaving you guys for idk how long but im back and I swear I won’t leave you guys like that again! im super exited to let you guys read this piece because it’s literally based on one of my favorite songs. please if you have any questions or requests feel free to send them and I’ll answer! thank you and enjoy wicked game :)

warnings :: mature language (that’s it I think)

alone.

that’s how i’ve been waking up for the past month and a half

I open my eyes as the dim light that peeps through the flimsy curtains greet my eyes

I get up and start my day by dragging myself out of my bed and to the bathroom. starting the day as I once did yesterday and the day before. I get out of my pajamas and step into my shower. Looking at the blank wall of the shower I zone out and think of what’s going to be different today

When I finish taking my shower I wrap a towel around my frame before I step out of the shower. I grabbed my toothbrush from the holder as I saw the second untouched toothbrush that was once used by him. quickly I grabbed it and threw it in the small trash that was next to my sink. well there goes my fucking day. I should’ve thrown everything he owned away the second he left

I finished brushing my teeth and washing my face before I step out and pick out an outfit for the day. I quickly got changed before I heard a little chime from my phone

soyeon[10:27AM]: hey babe! are you ready for our date?

soyeon[10:27AM]: i hope you know that i'm gonna spoil you today, so be ready 😈

I smile down at my phone before i respond to her

me[10:28AM]: don’t worry i’ve been preparing myself for what’s about to come, i know how you are

I placed my phone down next to me before I finished doing my hair and put a little bit of makeup on. I go to my kitchen and eat a little snack before I hear someone knock on my door. I grab my bag and walk towards the door opening it and i'm greeted with the view of an overly excited soyeon looking like she’s about to explode if we dont leave to the mall right now

“woah soyeon, you can relax i swear the mall won’t run away from us” I said laughing a bit as I step outside of my apartment and shut the door behind me

“____, babe, you don’t understand how long I’ve been waiting to finally have a girls day with you again! ughhh it’s been killing me!” she said giving me a small pout before grabbing my arm and we walking to her car

“I hope you don’t think that you’re good at hiding your feelings and emotions soyeon, I can read you like a fucking book” I said as we both laughed before she pulls out of the parking lot and starts to drive away to the mall

“you’d look so hot in this oh my god!” soyeon said squealing at me before she held a little white dress up to my body, “please ___, you have to get this,for me, get it for me!”

“where would I even wear this soyeon?” I said giggling at the way she has no care how she looks literally begging me in the middle of this random store in the mall to buy a silly little dress

“i don’t know, maybe to a house party, ouu! what about a date?”

damn.

the smile on my face falters for a second before I took the dress from her hand and nodded. soyeon looked at my face and she quickly grew aware of what she had just said

“shit, im sorry ____.. I didn’t know you were still hurt by-“

“i’m not.” I quickly said, “i’m not, I swear I got over him”

“____ you guys were together for three years, it’s been a month feelings don’t go away just like that babe..”

“no it’s okay soyeon, you know I just don’t want to talk about him, it’s all in the past” I gave her a quick smile before I told her I’d go and try on the dress she gave me.

after a few shops we both decided to sit down and eat for a while because the only thing I ate all day was the little snack I had before I left in the morning

“that looks good, wanna try that?” I said pointing to the sushi restaurant in the mall, the smell of the fresh food made its way to my nose quite literally causing me to levitate cause of how heavenly it smells

soyeon laughed at how I was looking at the food and nodded before we walked to the small restaurant. we got sat in a booth and I quickly started to look through the menu. damn there were so many good options to choose from

“hey, not to freak you out or anything but there’s a guy behind you who looks like if he doesn’t go and talk to you now he may lose it..” she said giggling before taking a sip of the water our server gave to us when they sat us down

“you’re kidding..”

“no! go and look for yourself” she said flashing me a toothy grin as she continued to giggle to herself

I turn my head a bit trying to act cool and not make it so obvious that i'm looking back. soyeon is right there is a man looking. he’s cute. he looks tall, around 6’0? he has short brown hair and soft features. I see him walk up to our table and and looks down at me with a soft smile

“hey, I’m so sorry to interrupt, it’s just you’re really beautiful and I was wondering if I can get your number? ah, im dohyun by the way!” he said as he then looked at soyeon and offered her a quick nod hello. soyeon looks as if she’s gonna piss herself, her eyes are beaming with joy

“hi dohyun, I’m ____, oh and uhm s-sure my number is……”

I gave him my number and we both said bye before he walked back to his table before his friends hit him playfully on the shoulder as he had a smile on his lips

“what the fuck just happened!” soyeon said tapping her feet to the ground excitedly and I let out a little laugh

“did you see that?”

“I saw that! girl he’s so cute you’re so lucky!” she said teasingly before we both heard a chime come from my phone

xxx-xxx[1:29PM]: hey it’s dohyun :)

soyeon and I both look up at eachother with huge grins on our face before I type back

me[1:30PM]: hey dohyun, it’s ____”

it’s been about four hours since soyeon dropped me off from the mall and I’ve been texting dohyun since then. it’s fun. I forgot how texting someone like this was

dohyun[5:47PM]: hey, are you busy?

me[5:50PM]: nah i'm just doing a little bit of work, wbu?

dohyun[5:51PM]: same, it’s just you’re all I can think of and it’s driving me crazy

woah.

I felt like a teenage getting texts from their crush all over again. I rolled on my stomach and kicked my feet back and fourth as I screamed into one of the pillows on my bed

me[5:53PM]: really?

dohyun[5:53PM]: really

dohyun[5:54PM]: hey i just wanted to ask if next Saturday you’d like to go out with me? that’s if you’re not busy of course

a date?

oh my god, a date!

me[5:55PM]: yeah of course! I’d love to :)

the rest of the night went by with small conversations over text with dohyun. this felt nice, warm, yet something inside me felt like it was holding me back but I just didn’t know what

“you’re joking, did he ask you?” soyeon asked shoving another piece of popcorn in her mouth while looking at me

“no soyeon, she’s only said it about one hundred fucking times” taehyung said throwing a pillow at her before she threw it back at him, hitting his in his face

“fuck you bitch”

“you wish” he said laughing at her irritated face

“yes soyeon he asked me on a date. im excited I just don’t know what to wear” I said scratching my arm nervously as I looked down at my sweatpants

it’s currently Wednesday and soyeon, taehyung, and I have all decided to have a little hang out and my place like we used to do almost every month with jungkook

jungkook.

“what about that dress soyeon forced you to try on when you guys went shopping last week?” taehyung said taking a sip of his beer before placing it back down the coffee table in front of us

“ouu, yes wear that one, I told you you look so fucking good in it, dohyu won’t know what hit him!”

“first of all his name is dohyun, second of all the place he’s taking me is like a picnic, I don’t think I should wear that type of dress to this date” I said biting the inside of my cheek

“first of all not my man, second of all I think you’re right, what about a pair of jeans and that cute top I bought you for your birthday last year? the one with flowers on the collar”

“that would be cute!” taehyung said smiling at me

“why thank you!” soyeon said fluttering her eyelashes at him

“not you, the fucking out fit you ugly ass troll” Tae said with a disgusted look on his face

I giggled as I watched them bicker for the rest of the night

I walked into the little café that was near the flower shop I worked at. I’ve been hearing a bunch of good reviews from customers so I decided I wanted to try it out. the second I stepped in the smell of fresh baked goods made its way to my senses. so far so good. I went up to the cashier and ordered a chocolate strawberry croissant and a coffee.

I sat down at a small table near the window and I saw the breathtaking view. the café was near an area with lots of trees and flowers. the window showed a beautiful sunset behind the natural view.

I got up to go and get my order and I sat back down. I took a bite out of my croissant and immediately fell in love with the taste. The chocolate melted on my tongue and the bread was so warm. I enjoyed my food and coffee before I got up and threw my trash away. right when I was about to leave I accidentally bumped into a hard chest. I looked up as I was about to apologize and stopped in my tracks.

“____?”

“jungkook?”

I said a quick sorry and started walking away but he grabbed me by my wrists stopping me from moving any further

“wait ____, please can we talk?” he asked, his voice laced with sadness

“I have to be somewhere jungkook, please let me go..” I said as I felt a ache in my chest that I haven’t felt since I saw him leave a month ago

“____ please..” he said sounding as if he was about to start crying “please ____…i-i need to talk to you”

“jungkook please let me go” I said, still not turning to look at him. I felt his grip on my wrist loosen and I walked away. tears brimmed my eyes and threatened to spill out but I was able to walk to my car and I just sat there

why.

he messed this up.

why does he want to make this more difficult?

I pulled out of the parking lot and drove home. I tried to forget about him but I just couldn’t. why is it that after trying so hard to move on I just can’t get him out of my head?

—Hope you guys likes the first part, I can’t wait to release all the other parts please stay tuned 🩵

—koosluvss

[midnight--sadness]

Ok hear me out - Gihun gave birth after he killed Dae-ho because it was so stressful. The pink guards help him 😭 (or geum-ja) In this au Junhee is not pregnant.

(Of course it's also Inho's baby but Gihun only know him as Young-il, so his heart is broken not only because of the failed rebellion but also Young-il's death)

Back in the dorm he tries to breastfeed but it doesn't work out so well, and Gihun is frustrated and sad that he can't even take care of his baby girl. Inho orders that the players get more food this time so Gihun can regain his strength and can breastfeed. The vips don't know that Inho is the father, there just wondering how Gihun could have a baby. (Once they find out about the gihussy a vip asked for Gihun, Inho wants to tear him to pieces but finds an excuse why he can't get Gihun for him)

But Inho can't do anything when the vips want the baby to be a player. His heart beats fast as he watches Gihun cross the bridge with the baby. All he wants to do is take Gihun to his bed, feed him properly and make sure that he can sleep in peace without staying awake all night because he is afraid that someone might harm the baby - but he can't do this. He can't even hold bis baby.

In the scene with the face reveal Gihun realizes that his enemy is the father of his little princess.

Inho: "Take the knife und kill the trash who wants to kill you and our baby girl"

Gihun: "This baby is mine. She has nothing to do with trash like you!"

Inho: "Kill them and I'll take you and the baby to a save place."

In this moment Gihun's tits are leaking so he turns around and leaves.

In the last game Inho shoots the Vips and stops the games - these people tried to hurt his daughter

Can someone please write a fanfic about that 🫶 but without Gihun's death please 😭

anon, you dont need to try to convince me, i love anything that involves gihun being pregnant fnjifrfjgki

inho killing the vips. everybody cheered!!!! the first one to die is gonna be the one who asked for gihun 😌

gihun being 9 months pregnant and still running around to murder daeho is so funny, im sorry 😭 but then he realizes what he's done and is so stressed out that he goes into labor, right beside daeho's corpse.

maybe the guards are ordered by inho to grab gihun and take him to the dorms so he can at least give birth in a bed. they do so, and when gihun suddenly doubles over, crying in pain, geumja and junhee are beside him immediately. gihun feels humiliated, having preferred to give birth in the middle of the game bc at least no one was looking at him....

when he has a healthy girl, inho breathes a sigh of relief. but then he remembers what the 5th game will be and almost considers calling it off entirely, no matter what the vips want. but gihun manages to go through the game, clutching their baby girl to his chest.

the confrontation would be so much more heartbreaking. not only did gihun know "youngil" before the games, he then lost him in a revolt gihun caused. i'm sure he felt incredibly guilt, knowing the father of his child would never know her.

but then he discovers that youngil is the front man and it shatters his entire world. his baby girl shares her dna with a man who murdered jungbae, who let hundreds of people die in the games....

gihun vows to himself to never let this man near their child, but then he sees how inho kills the vips, how he begs both gihun and the baby to safety. maybe in time, gihun can manage to forgive inho enough to let him be a part of their child's life 🫶

[blueflipflops]

Another incorrect quotes for my OC as Aizen fic before I post the final chapter!

Part 1

...

Aizen & Shinji @ each other: Asshole cat behavior🫵

....

Gin, about Aizen: Remember when he was mad at you and served you an assortment of funeral food?

Shinji: Yeah that was highly petty.

...

Random Rukon citizen: May Soumu-sama protect you, traveller!

Aizen, THE 'Soumu-sama', in disguise: let's fucking hope he does :)

...

Aizen @ a Division Meeting: —and if you have any suggestions, anything at all, please feel free to put them in the suggestion box!

Momo: Aizen thats a trash can.

Aizen: Sure is!

Shinji: No no he might be onto somethin-

...

Aizen: I can explain.

Shinji: Can you?

Aizen: If you give me 30 seconds to think of a lie—

...

*Division 5 Trio, doing paperwork and drinking sake at Shinji's office*

Aizen, suddenly: just once in my life I want to get up without experiencing the seven stages of grief.

Shinji: There are only five stages.

Momo: We're here for yo—

Gin, sneaked in to eat snacks: whats the extra two stages?

Aizen: Denial 2 and Astral Projection.

...

Shinji: *traps a spider under a cup*

Aizen: *appears and sets down two more identical cups *

Shinji: no wait–

Aizen: *starts shuffling the cups*

Shinji: NO

...

Aizen: Lying is not just a hobby. Its a national sport and I'm in the olympics with Kisuke and Shinji, the other two-faced bitches in this town.

...

Shinji: who? Sousuke? He's not evil. He just has a shitty personality. Which is almost the same.

...

Aizen, giving advice to his juniors: if you guys are ever thinking of suicide, don't do it. The Soul King doesn't want you to. The Soul King wants to kill you himself in his own special way

...

*In Canon Meets AU*

AU!Fifth Division, hearing about Evil!Canon!Aizen: Oh soul king… its the nicotine withdrawals isn't it? Its worse than we thought…

...

Shinji: Keep this shit up and I'll confiscate your cigarettes.

Aizen: *gasp* You wouldn't.

Shinji: Go ahead. Try me.

...

Aizen @ Canon! Shinji threatening to kill him: Huh… that was kinda… hot…

Shinji: what?

Aizen: Nothing

Canon!Shinji: what?

Aizen, full on blushing: NOTHING! LEAVE ME ALONE!!

...

Aizen: I think I would've thrived working and making one of those escape rooms thing

Aizen: that or I'd get too into my role that I'd get arrested for actual kidnapping and murder.

Aizen: ah. Well. That is, if I get caught. :)

...

Shinji: Remember that time when you planned an elaborate mystery game for the Fifth for 'Division Team Building Weekend'?

Aizen: Yes. It was painful to watch them miss simple clues and riddles. They've been doing this job for who knows how long, the least they could do is improve their observational skills.

...

Aizen: Do you mind if I light a smoke inside?

Shinji: Yes, I do mind.

Aizen: Shame... *lighting up a cig anyway*

...

Aizen: I could be so much worse. For example, I could start acting like my mother.

Shinji: Literally, the more I learn about yer mother the more concerned I get.

...

It's me boy, im the ao3 inside your brain. Go read my Bleach fic, boy

[femnoah]

Feral Female Noah part 3!!!

Part 1

The girls night!

Heather's still suspicious of what 'Noah' is up to and tells 'him' that. Cause she thought 'he' was going to be eliminated so why is 'he' still here? Courtney is also incredibly curious about it so 'Noah' tells them about the team swap with Cody. Their attention is then drawn to the rom com where they basically trash talk the main couple and then it turns out that the fl's ex boyfriend had cheated on her which sparks Heather to start ranting about it (she didn't actually kiss Trent you know, she's not stupid, it's like how fights in movies aren't real, it all comes down to camera angles).

Courtney tells Neha to tell Heather what Neha told her. So she explains what happened in the cargo, including the threats. "So he had a knife to my throat and told me he'd kill me if I told Courtney" "ohh, that's what the cut was about, I thought it was a shaving accident or something" "on this plane, honey please, I would never willingly let anything sharp near my neck" " honestly though, threatening you like that, what does he think this is, some sort of mob flick" Courtney just starts laughing at this. "I never thought of that, he really is cringey isn't he" "too right courts, I have no idea what you saw in that wannabe highlighter" " well, then I told him that if he tried that I would crush his dick and balls" "no way" "wait! you didn't tell me about that part!?"

They eventually end up talking about the rest of the guys when Courtney brings up potential crushes~ (cough cough heather cough cough). Heather immediately denies liking Alejandro which both Courtney and Neha comment on. "Why not, I mean he's fit and a gentleman!" "Yeah, the guy's hot and he's like perfect husband material" "...... didn't you call him a slippery eel Noah?" "I thought you were smart! You're like the only other person who knows he is evil and now you're calling him hot!!" "I stand by what I said, he's manipulative, slippery, hot, competitive, petty, a little diabolical at times and a total and complete eel: he's clearly husband material!" "If I didn't know any better I'd assume you'd have a thing for the guy" "that sounded pretty confession-like Noah, I'm actually kind of worried about you if that's what you find attractive" "Oh yeah, I definitely do, but don't worry I'm not going to fight you for him Heather, we can be each others totally lame wingmen instead" " so you ARE gay then!" "No" "don't be stupid Courtney, people can be bisexual" "Nah, I'm 100% heterosexual" ".....didn't you just admit to liking Alejandro" "were you dropped on your head as a kid or something nerd?"

Neha just looks at the two with a Cheshire grin before telling them that she'll let them in on a little secret. The other two are obviously very curious and lean in to presumably hear what 'he' is going to say. They weren't sure what they were expecting but it definitely wasn't for the new 'guy' on the team to grab 'his' hair- wait wig?! Staring back at them is a recognisable girl (woah, Courtney notes that her forehead is actually smaller than she thought- it must have been because of the wig- and now that she actually thinks about it, 'Noah' had always looked very feminine) with long messy hair and a smug grin that utters only one word "surprise~" . Heather's response to this after her moment of shock was to immediately start cackling (across the world, every total drama viewer and other contestants felt an intense shudder down their spine..... It was probably cause of climate change or something) and says "you really are straight, you fooled us all nerd, I'm impressed" "wait-- you'rE A GIRL?!?!!?"

She ends up telling them her name and the reasoning behind the whole pretending to be a boy thing cause what are they gonna do about it, tell on her to Chris? The other two girls agree to keep it a secret cause for once, it'd have no impact on the game. They also discuss slight game strategy (mainly how Gwen is totally the next eliminated on their team and how to handle Sierra after she finds out about the team switch), Neha tells them that after Gwen is gone, if they really need to vote someone else on the team off then they can vote for her (she's in the competition for reasons other than money rn so she doesn't mind getting eliminated so the other two who actually want to win the money can- as long as she gets what she wants out of it at least) which lessens Heather's distrust in her even more. "Wait, I just realised, it really is girls Vs boys now, I'm sure Chris is loving that" "not like any of the other idiots know that though" "yeah, and good luck getting them to believe either of you about it"

They even get to change into the spare pyjamas for the interns cause there's no cameras rolling in the staff quarters. Actual mildly comfortable pyjamas! And Neha doesn't have to wear multiple layers of constrictive clothing to hide her boobs, at last she can breathe, freedom!

The night ends with the three girls passed out and Neha clinging to them (no one can escape her koala grip, no matter the universe)

They're not immediately besties or anything (though they do look like it to everybody else) but all three of them feel like the night is the start of a genuine friendship (the first on the show for Heather and Courtney)

Heather wakes up first in the morning cause she feels someone tapping her. She then immediately wakes up the other two girls by screaming because she was NOT expecting to wake up to Chef leaning over them doing the 'I'm not mad, I'm disappointed' mum stance. Turns out they slept in... Whoops.

Next

[mk-wizard]

Shattered Glass TF One: Confrontation Part 1

Sentinel: *his wings have been shot off and he is literally up against the broken glass wall as D-16 approaches him looking angry and wanting blood* P-Please! No! Don't! Don't! *he begs* Orion: Kill him, D!! Send him to hell where he belongs! Starscream: *in this universe, he is an older mech and was admiral of the air force* D-16... D-16: You piece of trash... *he raises his cannon and charges it, but stops when he hears whimpering. His eyes go to the side and he sees B-127 who is just a child hiding behind the column sniffling and tearing up while shaking his head. D-16 looks back at Sentinel and then notices his reflection in the broken glass noting how his optics are on the brink of turning red. Looks around and notices other people looking at him not with encouragement, but with horror and he has flashbacks at how the crowd used to see him in the gladiator games and even remembers how the head of the arena would command him to kill his opponent* !! *he shuts his eyes tightly wincing, but then calms down lowering his cannon looking composed, but calm as his eyes once again are golden before walking up to Sentinel and lifting him up by the collar* I hate you. You took away my time, my energy, my life goals and my sense of purpose. And what you didn't take, you RUINED!! And I'm not your only victim. You did the same thing to Megatronus when you killed his wife and took his son from him and even took his cog after you took his life. Then you took away Alpha Trion's sanity by forcing him to watch and then leaving him. And then you took away everything from all Cybertronians and ruined Cybertron. You DESERVE to die! Sentinel: *looks horrified* D-16:... But if I do that, I'll just be giving you the one thing I have left. My dignity and I'll be damned before I hand that over to you, so I'm going to let you live, but in return... you're going to spend the rest of your life fixing everything you ruined and giving back everything you took. Starting with this *forces his cog port open* Sentinel: No! No! I need it! I'm nothing without it! D-16: If you're nothing without it, you're nothing with it! *manages to pull out Megatronus' cog and drops Sentinel to his feet who depowers into a flimsy, skinny pathetic looking bot* Starscream: *walks past Sentinel not even giving him a look* Orion: Smart move, D! Now that we've got the cog, WE have the power! D-16: What? Orion: With Megatronus' cog, we can be Primes, bro! D-16: The cogs Starscream gave us were left behind by soldiers who consented to having them given to those in need. Megatronus never consented. The right thing to do is to bury it with the remains of his ancestors and give him his last rites with dignity, Orion. Orion:... You always do this! Everytime I'm about to hit it big, you pull me away! D-16: Orion, don't do this now- Orion: You don't want to be Prime? Fine. But I do! Give me the cog! D-16: What? Orion: Give it to me! D-16: Orion, have you crashed your processor?! Orion: D, give me the cog! Cybertron needs a leader anyway! D-16: No. It needs one the right way not by claim or conquest. Orion, get your head on straight *keeps walking* Orion:......GIVE IT TO MEEEEEEEEEEE!! *tackles D-16* Starscream: D-16!! *rushes to help, but Alita-Nill shoots him in the leg* Alita-Nill: Don't interrupt *she smirks wickedly* D-16: *manages to pin down Orion* Orion, stop being a moron! Orion: *still is hanging onto the cog* You've stood between me and what I deserve for the last time! *he headbutts him and then kicks him off sending him falling off the side* D-16: *he flails around helplessly while watching the mining crew and Nightingale reach out to him, but there is nothing he can do* Orion: *holds up the cog laughing* HAHAHAHAHAHA!! It's MINE!! *he opens his port and removes the cog putting in Megatronus' but some kind of dark energy envelopes him and he mutates into something both bot and beastlike* Dirtboss: What's happening?! Starscream: Megatronus' cog brings out one's true nature. In his case, he became a warrior. For Sentinel, an icon. For Orion Pax............ a monster.

Orion puts his head back with his mouth gaping open in a twisted grin as he roars and his teeth turn into fangs with his green eyes burning. He continues to mutate and bulk up getting claws, spikes on his tires, fire out of his shoulder pipes and his right hand becomes a huge spiked ball and chain which cracks the floor once it falls down. He then lifts it up and swings it around in the air showing off his new giant, twisted and beastly frame...

Nemesis: IIIIIIIIIII AAAAAAAAAAM NEMESIS PRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME!! Starscream: Run! All of you, run!! *B-127 complies as do some of the others* Alita! Get away from him! Alita-Nill: *walks up to him and trails her finger along his chest* This is a new look for you. Nemesis: Like what you see, Alita? Alita-Nill:... I think I do... Prime.

[yakumtsaki]

Spice and Cyan are the last cousin-fuckers left standing and are proving impossible to break up. I'm inclined to blame the fact Sugar and June also had the hots for each other and passed these destructive genes on to these losers but whatever it is they're just annoyingly into each other.

Now I'm not gonna lie, I did almost waver cause I was like 'man you know what they're second cousins so at the end of the day truly who cares, maybe I should just let them stay together and create one Union super-bebe'.. and then I see this:

In case you can't tell from this amazing screenshot they have ONE BOLT. ONE. ALL THIS DRAMA OVER ONE BOLT ARE YOU KIDDING ME

-What is drama compared to someone you almost desire? -Oh baby, the mediocrity of my passion for you is too much to bear!

-This lukewarm hot tub water is the perfect metaphor for our love.. -Exactly, it's the water of the womb and we all know that's where that sole bolt is even coming from!

UGH. Also man the difference between your noses is UNREAL, now I'm more worried about that if you procreate than the incest.

-Hahahaha, as expected I'm the only one of this trash family that's in a non-disgusting relationship!

Felina no offense but you could afford to add some drama cause you've become boring af.

-People are sick of all this perverted nonsense! They want someone dignified and happily monogamous!

Ya idk sis, I mean look at Barth dislocating his entire spine as we speak:

-I SENSE BETRAYAL AGAIN. WHO DARES CHEAT ON ME NOW

-JIMMY, BACK IN THE ARMS OF MY COUSIN THAT I RIGHTFULLY STOLE YOU FROM. AND TO THINK I WAS GONNA MARRY YOU WHEN I WON THE HEIRSHIP

-You were??

-OF COURSE NOT

Bro I can't, the entire house hates Barth other than Meadow and her billion nice points and Spice who is his childhood bestie. Note that he and Sunset have that goddamn amour fou and are independently becoming un-enemies, which I'm NOT GONNA LET HAPPEN.

-Ok Barth, let's get drunk and make some reckless and sexy decisions!

SUNSET GODDAMMIT IT

-Why do you keep cockblocking us? You know our kids would be hot!

I DONT CARE

-Ya right! Don't act like you haven't thought about it!

IM NOT LISTENING TO THIS

-You know we would produce a hot, psycho turbo-Union! A little Jojo or Jojette, untainted by non-Union DNA, one freakshow to rule them all!! Look into your heart, you know it to be true!!!

ENOUGH, STOP TRYING TO SEDUCE ME WITH THE PROMISE OF COMICALLY INSANE OFFSPRING, SUNSET. EVERYONE FUCK OFF TO BED RIGHT NOW, GOODNIGHT

-AND GOOD MORNING, LOSERS

WTF. Why are you here we've paid our bills!

-BUT YOU HAVEN'T PAID THE INCEST TAX

-OMG THERE'S A FIRE🌞

-OMG THE REPOMAN IS HERE TO TAKE OUR SHIT

-OMG THE STREAKER KILLED OUR FISH

What??

-I JUST DON'T WANNA ADMIT IM STILL CRYING OVER BARTHOLOMEW

NOOOO NOT OUR BEAR STATUE WE'VE HAD IT SINCE GENERATION 1! PLEASE JUST TAKE ONE OF THE KIDS INSTEAD

-YOU SHOULD HAVE PAID YOUR BILLS

WE FUCKING DID

-PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU FLOPS

FUCK YOU, REPOMAN, WE'RE NOT FLOPS

-WAAAAAAAAH I CAN'T BELIEVE HE TOOK OUR BEAR

Oh great, now half these flops are in aspiration failure, that's just what the doctor ordered.

-OMG AND NOW THE OTHER PLANT IS ON FIRE

BRO WTF IS HAPPENING WE'RE CURSED

-WE ARE AND WE ALL KNOW WHO'S TO BLAME

-HE'S BEEN BAD LUCK SINCE HE WAS BORN

-Can you harpies take this somewhere else, I'm trying to get high here!

-KILL HIM

OK NO. No one's killing anyone, we're NOT cursed, ok?

-We're broke, afflicted with a bills glitch, fires keep starting and half the house is in aspiration failure!

Well let's be real, the broke part is on you.

-US??

You idiots are averaging a D each semester because you're too busy fucking each other, beating each other up or both..

..I mean freaking Jimmy is on academic probation, I have never gotten this before in all the years I've played this game, this is the worst college run of all time.

-WHAT IS YOUR POINT

My point is the bar is in hell so let's just get out of this run alive, ok? Now you kids make nice!

-Well, Failina, now that I'm looking at you up close I guess putting lipstick on a pig does work sometimes.

-For my next move, I'll shove my queen in your other eyehole.

See, now isn't this nice? And I think I figured out what caused the bills thing so everything should be fine now..

-THINK AGAIN BITCH

OH FFS

-I'M HERE TO FREE THIS NEIGHBORHOOD FROM YOUR TERRIBLE SPOKEN WORD POETRY

Ok you know what I'm actually fine with that one, take it- Um do I hear hearts??

UH WHAT????

-THAT'S RIGHT IM IN LOVE WITH KEA FOR NO CLEAR REASON

WTF

-We've been friends for a long time-

You have?? Man I really need to pay more attention around here.

-Yes well you can't help being useless!

Very true! Well please, continue, let me just call someone over-

-YOU LEFT THE HOT TUB OF LUKEWARM LOVE TO CHEAT ON ME???

Man I know, it's so terrible! Anyway-

-HOW DARE YOU BE UPSET WITH ME FOR CHEATING ON YOU

CYAN WTF LOL

-YASSSS BEAT HIS ASS UP BABE HE DESERVES IT

DOES HE?? Cyan you are one crazy bitch, I love it.

-I take after my mom! :D

Which one, they're both insane! :D

-What's it take to get your number? What's it take to bring you home? Hurry up, it's time for supper, order up, I'm hot to go🎵

Alright well Chapell karaoke seals it, Kea, welcome to the family!

-You mean it this time right, you won't fuck me over again like when I was engaged to Sophito?

LOL I forgot about that but no I'm certain this one is gonna work out, unless crazy ass Cyan goes back to one of her cousins

-What?

I said start planning the wedding!