#i'm exhausted all the time
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So fucking tired of working from Monday to Saturday and barely having time for myself to do the things I enjoy.
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How do I explain to people that I would love to help with things online that require enough time to spend in the day (advertising small business, networking for dogs in need of rescue, etc) or play games with friends online, among other things, but I can't because my mother lives with us and and calls me to help her with shit at least 4 times an hour every fucking day, without sounding crazy? She expects me to be available whenever she wants something, doesn't matter if I'm busy and have my own shit to do, anything I'm doing is nowhere near important than whatever she's doing. And heaven forbid I have free time and want to play a game. If she's got her own work to do and no one else is working she screams and yells and complains that she's the only one that does anything in this family. Doesn't matter how much we do, nothing compares to what she does. I'm so tired of it.
#When is my life going to start?#How fucking old do I have to be to be able to do my own shit with my own life and not have to cater to her?#random shit#my mother#living with a narcissist#I'm exhausted all the time
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#On a side note people's inability to have open and honest conversations is too prevelant in my life#Like the fact that I have to drag what people really are trying to say or want out of them is just too much work#I'm exhausted all the time#And it's so weird because I think I'm pretty chill and understanding#I'm only mean to me yanno?
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I moved recently to start a new job and part of my commute now involves one of those high capacity toll booths where a two lane road suddenly flares out into 5-7 lanes of total anarchy with no lines anywhere, and then narrows back down to two lanes again, and we're just supposed to sort ourselves out? Who designed this
anyway I dreamed up this helpful anatomical guide on the drive home
#thought of flipping it upside down for it to read correctly but then it didn't feel like the driver pov#oh also yeah aside from generally pulling back from online spaces for the most part I've started a FAST-PACED full-time job#after on and off contract/part time work since 2020#I am WIPED#all the time#exhausted#I'm told I will adjust and I am trusting these people but holy shit I'm capital B Bushed#you will not see me frequently anymore but do not mourn for me#I am adjusting to my new fish tank...#I will be thriving#by the time I turn 30 next year I will be able to hit my 30s at a run#I'm feeling it mr krabs
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step by simple step
#sephiroth#cloud strife#ff7#cloud strife fanart#sephiroth fanart#advent children#ffvii#final fantasy#artists on tumblr#sketch#i'm honestly so exhausted all the time#managed to finish this between work
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im so fucking useless
#all I do is consume without contributing anything to society#i feel so guilty for eating breathing taking up space buying things producing trash wasting people's time and energy#literally my existence has no meaning#why am i alive#literally w.o.r.t.h.l.e.s.s.#tw depressive#tw depressing thoughts#tw depression#depressing shit#sorry for being depressing#im exhausted#i hate everything#i hate my self#more than anyone else#i dread having to exist#self h@te#i'm sad#mentally tired#vent#venting#personal
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I've been enjoying chapter 2, doodled some of my favourite sprites to keep me sane during overtime at work this week
#danganronpa despair time#drdt#nico hakobyan#ace markey#david chiem#teruko tawaki#drdt spoilers#I love it when fangans have so many unhinged sprites#they're so much fun#I'm still working on requests dont worry#I've just had multiple 12 hour days this week and I'm exhausted#this is all I could do while I wait for my code to deploy#loz draws
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[The Cursed, Unwanted Child: Ostracised by the Village]
#jujutsu kaisen#ryomen sukuna#jjk sukuna#sukuna#jujutsu kaisen fan art#fan art#my art#jjk#heian era#king of curses#true form#og sukuna#somebody said its Sukuna Angst hours#and i took that personally#This time i tried myself to do something a liiittle bit more different#and in a limited time#and also apologies if the blood looks weird i don't really draw blood or gore often if at all#but yes if Gege's not giving us Sukuna's backstory any time soon then i'll just start speculating#this is connected to that brainstorm post i made in the past#i'm so exhausted =_=#i wanted to add more details but like i said#i has ran out of time#V_V#jjk fan art#kid sukuna
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Dear mod. I just wanted to ask how you're doing atm? Are you eating good food and sleeping well?
Oh bless you, anon! Regrettably, neither of those things, no. My appetite has been very poor since my surgery, and I'm more than a little sleep deprived with all the jobs I'm juggling at the moment - buuut... I'm alive. My head is good. My work is good. Always manage to make everyone happy, oh, yes sir, but can't wait to pass out for a whole day and then hang out with some friends. It'll heal me.
#mod speaks#i'm doing some of my best work!#kind of unstoppable at the moment! but. very. very exhausted.#very popular at my new workplace and very popular with the clients at the moment.#but it means when i have spare time it's Solely for A) sleeping and B) spending time with the people i love#oh and C) spending time with the people i love's pets.#very important.#i do miss drawing for myself but it'll happen when i have a quiet patch#but honestly right now i'm enjoying my success. successful career. successful social life...#spiderpool is like.. the third circle in the venn diagram.#i don't think i can have all three. i can only have two at a time.#i'm trying to squeeze in “self care” somewhere in there too. which involves exercising and getting enough sleep.#that one i'm really struggling with at the moment.#i think that one has to take priority over spiderpool too. sighs.
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August and Peter figuring out the whole ~siblings~ thing. From the October Daye series, specifically the Patreon story, "In Safety Rest".
#seanan mcguire#october daye#august torquill#peter lorden#fanart#sometimes you're like i just want to draw out how this wheelchair would work#and you promise yourself there won't even be a background#and then suddenly it's like why am i drawing all this weird coral#what color is anything#what is perspective??#anyway enjoy! i'm exhausted#seanan was like what if we could be in the undersea all the time and i was there!! with bells on!!#friendship ended w/ kingdom of the mists#duchy of ships and saltmist are my besties now#also didn't consider that drawing a full mermaid situation means i have to go horizontal which...not the best for tumblr!
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low effort raditz kissies
#my art#dragon ball#raditz#ive been struggling with drawing because i'm so exhausted all the time so my output's been pretty bad#i'm not sure what the reason is like if it's just the time of year or something. frowns. this is the best i can do rn
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She is offering water to any lost travelers! However, it's so hot that the water has become tea, so she's adjusted accordingly!
#neopets#neotag#neoart#kiko#slorg#aquanutart#this was for a western themed beauty contest last year! it was very fun! :D i'm so happy we were able to be part of it!#and by 'very fun' i mean it's completely exhausting and i can only handle participating once or twice a year#but it is very exciting too! she gave tea to everyone who stopped by. she was very happy to be able to help so many visitors!#i actually forgot until i checked whether this was from one or two years ago... my sense of time as an adult is --- *waves hand vaguely*#i'm so sorry for all the messages i didn't answer. specifically to the user who sent me a really kind message out of the blue#about how they got the slugawoo avvie from my quiggle's lookup. i didn't even know you could get the avvie from his lookup#so i was very happy to find out!! and i was happy there might be more people getting the avvie from his lookup i didn't know about#and i wanted to tell them how absolutely happy it made me and my brain said ' you should respond to this right away or you won't do it'#and i thought you fool. of course i'll make sure to do something this important#and i kept thinking about it for the past year and thinking i will do it. i will do it#but when i thought about writing the words that were floating in my mind the whole time i would feel blocked#this happens all the time and i'm sorry. it really does make me so happy#and then they deleted all the neomails but thankfully i had it saved so i still was able to find their username and send a message thankyou#i'm very glad
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everything about Gavriil feels suffocating.
how his presence alone can be almost overwhelming, how his massive body cages you everytime without a chance to escape. you wouldn't dare to try anyway, knowing that you don't even have a say against a creature of his caliber. he will find you. in your dreams, in your nightmares. in your room.
how he will be intense and vague about everything just for the sake of it; to confuse you further, to see the conflict of emotions in your eyes merge with arousal. eventually your hesitance turns into acceptance, a desperate need to feel his hands all over you. and he will be oh so grateful to fulfill that desire.
how his thick tongue pushes past your lips and into your mouth, reaching almost the back of your throat, relishing in the muffled little sounds you make. your drool mixed with his saliva drips down your chin, and your hazy eyes look up at him when he finally pulls away, giving you a second to breathe.
how his hips are slamming into you relentlessly, your wetness and lack of resistance allowing him to move almost effortlessly. forced to hold onto him for dear life instead of pushing away. all of your morals and principles are being tossed out of the window every single time he comes to you. he has you where he wants you, and will not stop until he feels like you can't take it anymore.
and how in the morning he vanishes away, leaving you guessing: was it just another wet dream? but the cold stickiness between your legs tells you more than you need to know.
#yes bringing this back bc at the time i didn't tag it properly#okay im gonna complain in here now.#need... to... draw... something... but i dont... have the strength..#drawing on my phone is so exhausting but i have no other option#bc i think my traditional art is not very polishedddd and i dont want to answer asks with ittttt#but maybe i will#bc i think i'm really getting to that burnout#and giving how my bday is getting closer and closer....#i dread it. but hey. cake. money. i'll get a new piercing#i WILL cry ofc but hey. maybe someone will buy me tea as a gift. who knows.#i just want to spend some time with someone yknow:(#just... talk. about anything. sit beside eachother and stare off into the waters#i hope the snow will melt soon because i want to go out more even if by myself#gonna find a job when summer comes... maybe talking to colleagues and all that will help... everythings gonna be fine.. i hope#i just need friends. god.#microtya's kids#microtya: gavriil#monsterfucker#monster fucker#monster x human#monster boyfriend#monster lover#teratophillia#god x human#monster smut
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Some sketches I did of the silly commentator guy(s)
#they are the blorbos of all time#i just need them to talk to each other a lot and snuggle#not too sure if I'm really going to go back to being super active with posting art/reblogging on this account anymore because lord this#-fandom can never not have drama#it's exhausting to read#but i WILL be active/present#just less so#anyways those rsn guys are fruity i dont make the rules#pixar cars#cars fandom#pixar cars fanart#darrell cartrip#bob cutlass#they are yapper x listener#could also be yapper x yapper though tbh#✎𓂃#I'm getting better at drawing vehicles yippee!!#darrell cartrip x bob cutlass#barrell
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They crash your graphic software and then give you this look
#yes I know I shouldn't have all pages in one file#the file that is 135 MBs at this point (and the pages are not even done)#the consequences of my actions!#I was looking forward finishing it on Friday/Saturday but I realized I have stuff to do over the weekend and now I'm just exhausted :'D#it's done when it's done#local woman realizing art as fulltime dayjob significantly slows her creative process in free time#shocking and unexpected!#local trains AU#spam
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You know, at this point I'm wholeheartedly convinced that fanart/fanfiction/fan any content is what's keeping Hellaverse alive because when fan content has better writing and portrayals of these characters than the actual shows and canon themselves you kinda know you fucked up.
I'm not necessarily talking about fanon either, I've been writing within the Hellaverse RPC (roleplay community) here for almost a year now and seeing how people take these characters, deconstruct them and flesh them out with their own spin on things regardless if these are just small little add ons to already established lore or drastic changes, the share creativity coming from these writers and the muns I've befriended make me wish we had a show(s) that was made with as much love and care than those who do enjoy Hellaverse in some shape or form.
It also helps that half of that RPC is as critical and salty as I am. Birds of a feather flock together.
Don't get me wrong, the Hellaverse fandom as a whole is a cesspool of toxicity and horrible people, there are bad eggs within the RPC as well trust me, but one of the reasons why I am still in some of these spaces (critical and small groups with friends) is because I enjoy the creativity that comes out of those who do have passion and care for these shows and what they could have been suppose to what they ended up being...
Idk I feel like despite how cynical and jaded I've become and stopped watching Helluva Boss all together outside of the shorts that interest me, I like to look on the more positive parts of the fandom and community even how much the Stans and toxic fans extremely outnumber them...
#here goes sweets off her bullshit again#helluva boss critical#hazbin hotel critical#i'm just exhausted being so negative all the time and think about some of the good that HH/HB gave me#i was a fan which is why im so passionate with the direction and wasted proteineal these shows could have had
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