#i wrote most of it in 2017 and the rest of it when i got back into fibs in 2022 and hadn't written fic in YEARS

[starsarebleeding]

i always kind of delight in writing and having a song on repeat that has lyrically NOTHING to do with the subject matter, but the vibe ---

anyway i'm doing a complete overhaul of June, and i'm so excited, and ariana's helping me out

[tojisun]

sugar, spice, everything on ice (hockey au)

hockey player simon riley x f!reader’s relationship, through the eyes of the fans // sort of smau

i was listening to 5sos’ slsp while writing this so!!! sorry i went bonkers 😔 i just love this au sm

simon riley is obsessed with his girl, and it is maddeningly endearing.

of course he’s in love with you, everyone could see even from a continent away, but there is something clingy, possessive, in the way simon hovers around you. like you’d disappear right before his eyes if he wasn’t pressed close; if his tattooed arm wasn’t looped around your waist or his thick fingers were not twined with yours.

it is new, unheard of, even riley’s loyal fans says so, but it’s just so—

nice.

(the word is inadequate, they know, but there’s nothing close that could describe how heart-fluttering his devotion to you is.)

riley has always been a private person, sharing only sparse details of his life. one can even easily locate his earliest instagram post because there’s just about twenty uploads in his account since its creation—from 2017, and it’s a broken hockey stick. even that throw-away picture continues to amass likes as new fans come scouring whatever of him they can find.

his latest post was during last season’s finals’ celebrations—a series of pictures of the boys carrying the stanley cup. the first few pictures were all professionally taken, but the rest splinters into blurred shots of mactavish and garrick, particularly, drinking from the cup from inside of the locker room.

it said: thank you all.

curt, direct, but not any less meaningful.

cut to this year, mid-regular season (january), and after five months of drought, the simon riley posted a picture. and it wasn’t just any picture, but it was a hard launch of his new partner.

it was a selfie, taken by you, the camera angled just slightly. your back was pressed to his chest, and his chin was hooked to your shoulder, and, cheek-to-cheek, the two of you grin up at the camera. the background was distinctly new york, central park, so it must have been taken after the specgru’s game against the rangers (0-4 for the specgru).

for the caption, he wrote: she’s never been here before.

in an instant, all of the speculations were confirmed—the most eligible bachelor of the franchise is, finally, in an official relationship.

news articles popped up after that, speculations bloating at the shocking news. some people have even said that they’re sure they’ve seen you prior to the announcement—weren’t you that one fan simon riley was flirting with while he was on ice, mid-game?

(you were.

you were even one of the people that was tagged in johnny’s story before it got preemptively taken down; and the same person seen with the other WAGs, sprinkles of your silhouette seen on pictures like the ones that are taken on the days when the franchise flies them for game nights or the countless ones during the unveiling of the season’s WAGs jackets.

you have been a part of their circle even before the world knew who you were and, somehow, that was comforting; how simon riley had not thrown you to the wolves—or vultures, as mactavish snarled when they’ve hounded him about his fiancee’s abrupt end of her season in the FIVB, like her health wasn’t the priority over her career—and instead made sure you were surrounded by people who knew how to survive amidst the scrutiny.)

and, just like that, the dam called simon-riley’s-secret-album-of-you broke.

what had been a sporadic activity in his account exploded into series of posts, one update every week. it was a whirlwind of excitement because no one from the hockey world has ever seen this much of simon riley’s life.

he was always unapproachable, distant, like there’s always a wall between him and the rest of the world. like in exchange of being called the living legend, the guiding star, simon riley gets to shirk away from the public whenever he chooses. and who can fault him for that? riley’s career has always been heavily documented—people knew him even before he was drafted into the league, they had betted on his rookie year, and then had put him in a lonely pedestal. so of course he is fiercely protective of his privacy.

only a select few get to truly know him, only a select few have stories of simon that isn’t about the ice or hockey or his in-the-works legacy. only a select few see him beyond his crown, and now he’s giving a piece of his true self to the world because of you.

because you are worth showing off.

because life with you is worth celebrating.

.

riley41

[it’s a candid image of you standing on the balcony, wearing a too-big of a shirt that is getting ruffled by the wind and pyjama pants, and leaning over the railing as you stare at the scenery. you’re all silhouette because your body is devoured by the orange rays of the sunrise, its tendrils spilling into the wooden floors of the hotel room.]

liked by jmactavish.91, reyenzo14, and others

riley41 ibiza

.

riley41

[it’s a series. the first image is of the two of you on his motorcycle, the picture taken from simon’s bike’s camera. you’re both wearing tinted helmets and leather gears, the background a blur of colours which indicates that this was taken mid-ride. you’re gripping him tightly and your body is almost fully-covered by his bulk, leaving only the top half of your helmet to be seen peering from his shoulders.

the second image is of the beach. it’s dusk, and the sky is an explosion of pinks and purples and blues.

the third image is a selfie with your visors up. you’re looking at the camera with a shy smile, your eyes squinted because of how bright it still is, while simon only has his eyes on you.]

liked by pricejhn2, alexkeller_, and others

riley41 vroom

.

riley41

[it’s a mirror selfie of the two of you, with simon taking the photo. the background is notably his house. your back is facing the mirror, your head tilted to rest on his shoulder, while his arm is curled around your waist. you’re wearing this season’s WAG jacket—it’s black and green, their colours. the pose now makes sense because you’re showing off the back of the jacket that spells out RILEY 41 in white. simon’s wearing their away-jersey.]

liked by kylegarrick, konig_76, and others

riley41 game six let’s go

.

riley41

[it’s a video; the angle shows that it is taken by someone else. you and simon are hugging, and are swaying lightly as the two of you dance to the faint sound of music booming from somewhere behind the camera. simon’s mouthing the lyrics to your ear, his cheeks flushed like he’s buzzed from drinking, while you giggle and softly rub your palm at his back.]

liked by jmactavish.91, kylegarrick, and others

riley41 my favourite person

.

.

yourname

[it’s a candid picture you’ve taken of simon sleeping while he uses your lap as pillow. the angle captures the way your fingers are playing with his hair and scratching his scalp gently. the picture is a little blurry because there’s not enough light to properly focus the lens.]

liked by riley41, jjoanne.spam, and others

yourname im the happiest when im with him

[jikooklove9795]

Hi,

I just wanted to ask if white day is a special day for Jikook

I’ve seen all sorts of posts today but couldn’t grasp the timeline? Has it only been since 2022 that they’ve done something that is known?

Cheers

Hi Anon 😊

Before we dive into this post, let's first see what White Day is.

In South Korea, March 14th is celebrated as White Day, exactly one moth after Valentine's Day. In SK Valentines Day is traditionally focused on women. It is the woman who express her love for her man through gifts. And on White Day the man who received gifts on Valentine's Day is expected to return the favor with gifts of his own.

So, basically White Day is considered as an important day for couples in SK.

On 14th March 2022, White Day, Jimin opens his IG and posts a pic of him and Jungkook backstage during their PTD concerts:

As expected it sent us into chaos, a happy delightful chaos. But it didn't stop there. Later we found out that Jikook went out for dinner on White Day joined by Jimin's friends.

Not only that but in the restaurant pic we couldn't help but notice Jungkook wearing a cap that most likely belonged to Jimin. The one that has "Jimin" written on the back. Just another detail adding to the Jikook filled night.

And just when we thought that was it, Jikook dropped the biggest bomb with the release of the BTS Monuments documentary. That's when we finally got the whole picture.

On March 13th 2022, just two hours after their concert, Jungkook arrives at Jimin's apartment. We know this from the date displayed on Jimin's fridge. Jimin orders fried chicken for them and Jungkook also cooks them dinner. They spend the night together. And the next day, which is White Day they head out for dinner together from Jimin's apartment.

Most jkkrs here, myself included believe that Jikook have been living together for a long time now. So, hearing and seeing all of this? Not exactly surprising, just one more proof of what we already knew.

Now let's move on to 2023.

On March 14th 2023 Jungkook went live from his home when Jimin was in the US for his FACE promotions. This live has 4 parts. Should've known who this live was meant for when Jungkook started the live at 8:11 pm KST. The songs for this live are heavily Jikook coded.

1) Jungkook played There For You, a song which he used for his first ever GCF, which was basically all about Jimin.

2) He also sang the Korean version of Mistletoe (Christmas Day) for which Jimin wrote the lyrics and which Jikook covered back in 2014.

3) Then there's Nothing by Bruno Major. In 2020 Taehyung posted a selca of him and Jimin under which he mentioned this song saying that it was Jimin's recommendation. Then in 2022 when Jimin was asked to pick a song for the ending credits of a documentary about him he again chose Nothing saying that the mood of the song goes well with him.

4) How can we forget Hate Everything? Jungkook posted a cover of this song on 3rd Feb 2022. The cover was 1:18 mins long (there's that number again). This was the time when Jimin was receiving in patient treatment following his surgery. And Jungkook had to stay away from him due to covid protocols. And then in 2023 he again plays this song when Jimin's away from him, this time due to his schedule.

5) The next song is Falling. This is a song both Jimin and Jungkook like. Jungkook posted a cover of this song on 28th Oct 2022. And guess what's special about 28th Oct? Well, Jikook went on their Tokyo trip on 28th Oct 2017. (Numbers are not a joke when it comes to Jikook. They give importance to special dates, milestones in their relationship).

Jimin comments during the second part of this White Day live. His presence was so significant throughout the live. Though he was not physically present his presence was still felt, thanks to Jungkook.

Jungkook also flexed his JM tattoo which was noticeably darker than the rest while JVKE's Golden Hour was playing in the background. He followed it up with the lyrics "Love of my life". HE'S A CERTIFIED ROMANTIC!!! (only for Jimin).

During this live he changes his outfit 2 times. Starts with a black jacket, then changes to a white shirt and then finally a purple hoodie. Ends the live by asking us to look forward to midnight saying that something amazing is dropping at midnight. And we all know how it went... SMF pt2 teaser came out. Not to forget that he also teased Jimin's song using his hair tie.

For SMF pt2 Jimin uses 3 outfits. A black jacket and a white sweater for the main mv and a purple jacket for the dance practice video.

Can it be a coincidence? Sure. But what are the chances of their outfit colors being in that exact same order, right when SMF pt2 was dropping? Most of the time Jikook and "coincidence" doesn't go hand in hand and this was one of those times.

So, these are the two times Jikook was loud on White Day.

But here's an honorable mention. It was on 14th March 2016:

Jungkook took this video of a sleepy Jimin and posted it with the caption "Jimin hyung is sleepy, someone please put him to sleep".

So, yes! White Day is a special day for Jikook. But it's not just White Day, we have also seen how much importance they place on spending their birthdays together and how much effort they put into it.

Jungkook left the entire fandom in shock by going all out for Jimin's birthday. Booking a trip to Tokyo, taking him to Disneyland and even creating a GCF to immortalize the moment, all for the world to see and scream over. Just when we thought that was the peak of effort Jimin proved once again that they match each other's energy. He took a 13 hour flight from Paris to Seoul just so he wouldn't miss his bf's birthday, arriving with exclusive limited edition gifts in hand. And as if that wasn't enough he even teamed up with Hoseok to arrange a surprise party. And just one look at Jungkook's face in that pic proves how much it meant to him.

And then in 2020 we learned that Jimin and Jungkook were together at home on Jungkook's birthday. The next day Jimin even prepared a cake to celebrate.

We have also seen them spending special couple days together.

Like wearing matching jackets on Valentine's Day. And watching the first snow together, which again is a couple tradition in SK. It signifies fresh beginnings leading to a lasting relationship

Or posting this on Chinese Valentine's Day with the caption "Love Ya ❤"

Or show up on 14th January 2018 which is Diary Day in SK again an important day for couples by wearing matching rings

I almost forgot about Chuseok. Its a family holiday in SK.

This was their first "couple" moment for Chuseok:

This is from the Chuseok of 2016.

For 2017's Chuseok, while everyone went home to celebrate the festival Jikook stayed back together at the dorm.

They posted this at 4am on the Chuseok of 2020:

And then Jimin posted the fish drawing for 2023's Chuseok with the caption " JK's work 😅" which we saw both of them talking about and drawing in AYS Jeju.

Then there's Silver Day. This pic was posted by Jungkook on Silver Day with the caption "Jimin hyung's big smile" (14th July 2019)

On Silver Day couples exchange silver accessories as a sign of their love and commitment.

Hoseok's JITB Party was on Silver Day. And there was Jimin casually wearing his Maison Margeila necklace along with the bracelet from Polyc, the very same one that unsurprisingly Jungkook also owns.

But what makes the Maison Margeila necklace special? Well he owns the one with numbers ranging from 10 to 16 and guess which number is circled? Number 11

So let's take out 11 and add all the other numbers:

10+12+13+14+15+16

We get 80

And then have 11

Together it becomes 11/8 tada 😮

So, yeah that makes it extra special for him

2023's Silver Day was a major moment in the Jikook world. Jimin boarded a flight from Seoul just to be with Jungkook who was swamped with preparations for his solo debut performance in the US. Despite the packed schedule they made time for each other, stepping out in matching black and white outfits for dinner on the same day Jimin arrived. They returned to the same restaurant again this time with no cameras, no staff just the two of them before Jimin had to fly back home.

This one isn't about a designated couple's day but its still incredibly significant. Recently K side went into a frenzy upon discovering that Jimin and Jungkook sent a joint flower wreath, something typically done by couples. They were the only individuals who sent one together.

You might have noticed how Jimin and Jungkook follow a pattern, they don't just do these things once they repeat them over the years. But we only find out when they choose to let us know or when it slips through company content. Its clear they value these traditions and make a conscious effort to spend them together. What we see is probably a fraction maybe a quarter of it. But just because we don't see everything it doesn't mean it isn't happening.

Thanks so much for this ask, Anon! I loved answering this! Have an awesome day 👋🏻

Credits to the owner of the video

[sweetdispatch]

Forget about us - A. Matthews

Songs masterlist pairing: Auston Matthews x fem!reader summary: Retrospection from Auston and his (ex) girlfriend relationship warning: none

One night in 2016 changed her and Auston’s lives. He just came to play hockey for local team. She got accepted on university here. Both clicked in a minute. They’ve been just a teenagers but after one party, they saw future with each other and they knew, they are made for each other.

After a month, Auston asked her to be his girlfriend. She was over the moon. He was her first true love. In 2017, she moved to his house. Despite their busy schedules, they always found times for every week dates. People were saying that they’re soulmates.

Auston had never been afraid of showing her on social media. They were one of the most popular couples in NHL. On every home game, you could see her face in the stands, rooting for him. He was more than grateful to have her by her side. She could say the same about Auston. She felt his support every time when she was at her low.

Everything changed at the beginning of 2024. She wasn’t going on his games. People were assuming that she’s pregnant and doesn’t want to be in spotlight. They hoped to see soon a ring on her finger, but this never happened. When people were asking about her absence, Auston decided to make a statement. He wrote on his Instagram that they split up. It was shock to everyone. They always looked so in love with each other and after almost 8 years of dating, they broke up. They never shared the information why they decided to part away. Lot of journalists were asking Auston questions but due respect to her, he never said anything. All they were left with, were memories.

Saw you blew up, and I’m proud of you

After they split up, she stopped paying attention to hockey. It was too hurtful for her. All she knew about this sport was thanks to Auston. With time, the city started to overwhelm her with the memories. She moved to Quebec City. In new place, she felt alive without hockey on every single step. She made new friends and got a new job. She found new hobbies like yoga and painting. She started to discover herself from the beginning.

In one of the hot and sunny days in August, she was driving her car to work. She was late already and forgot to plug her phone to put on her music. She turned the radio on just to have something playing in the background. She couldn’t drive in silence. The radio station was playing the most popular songs until they started sport news and then, she heard his name.

The journalist said “John Tavares is not the captain anymore! Toronto Maple Leafs just announced that Auston Matthews has become 26th captain in the franchise history and first-ever born American to be their captain…”. She couldn’t focus on the rest of the news. All she felt were tears going down her cheeks. She knew her makeup is ruined but she didn’t care.

She wanted to act surprised, but she couldn’t. She knew that he deserved the “C” like no one else and one day he’s gonna get it. She was super proud of him. Before she left the car, she grabbed her phone and wanted to write to him with congratulations but she stopped herself.

She started talking about this to her friends. They weren’t pleased that she’s mentioning her ex-boyfriend, but they saw how happy she is while talking about him. She was smiling all the time, and they haven’t saw her that joyful since she and Auston split up, so they let it slip.

I don’t want you ever to forget about us in the front seat,

Listenin’ to songs that made you think about me

Auston was always nervous before the games. It was causing arguments between him and her because he was taking his frustration on her. She came up with great idea. Most players take naps before matches, but he wasn’t one of them. One day, she told him to get into the car. He obeyed and sat in passenger seat. She started the car and was driving around city. She put music on and talked to him about the tv show she’s currently watching. She wanted to keep his head busy and far away from hockey.

He loved their trip and asked her before every home game to go on a little trip. She gladly accepted his offer but from now, he was driver. He preferred to have her on passenger seat where he can keep his hand on her thigh.

She was very specific about the music. She was always the one to choose songs. Auston didn’t mind it. He saw how much of a joy it is for her, to show him her favorite songs or just put one of her playlists. She loved singing in the car and soon after, Auston was doing this with her. It was always a great fun for them. For these little moments, he was grateful.

After they break up, Auston continued this tradition to calm his nerves. Before every game, he was driving around and listening to songs from her favorite playlist. It wasn’t the same like with her. He was now all alone in the car. Singing wasn’t that much fun without her. He tried couple times, but it felt wrong to him. Instead, he decided to listen to her playlist when he was driving to the rink for a game.

But when I hear your name, it’s still so raw

Auston loved her name. It was so unique, yet so normal. It was a pleasure for him to say it. He was feeling pride when he was introducing her to new people and could say it out loud. To call her his. He was using pet names towards her like love, dove, sweetheart or baby, but none of the nicknames could replace her name and how much he loved it.

When they broke up, he felt like her name is a forbidden word. He never said it again. He hated hearing it from others mouth. It felt wrong to him. When he started to hooking up with other women, and heard that one of them share the same name, he ditched the woman. It was a fresh wound for him. He didn’t wanted to disrespect the legacy she built in his life.

Do you remember the way we fell, and,

Like everything froze with just once glance?

They met in one of the clubs. Her friends visited her and decided to go and get drunk. She was more than willing for this idea. It was a casual night out. She hasn’t planned to meet anyone. She just wanted to enjoy her and her friends.

Auston went to the club with his friends to celebrate his draft. He was delighted that he’s gonna be in NHL. He planned to get drunk and maybe to hook up with someone. Nothing binding. Although this changed when he saw her.

When their eyes met in the club, both froze in a spot. She felt like she saw the most handsome men in the world. He felt like he saw the most beautiful woman in the world. He wanted to go and talk with her, but he lost his confidence. He was confident that this gorgeous girl must be in a relationship. When his friends saw his state, they pushed him to make a move.

Auston went to talk with her, and they clicked immediately. They found out that they have common passions and interests. The next day, he asked her on a date. They’ve been spending every day together and after a month, Auston asked her to be official for what she was grateful.

I don’t want you ever to forget about us

I know we were never perfect, but I think about the life we never had

She loved talking with Auston about their future. When they adopted a dog, she felt like it’s a big step for them. She always imagined their married life in a big house with a dog and kids. She was the only child and she dreamt about having at least three kids.

Auston always listened to her stories about their future life but never said anything. He saw future with her, but he felt like it’s happening to fast. Yes, they’ve been together for almost 8 years, but he hasn’t felt the need to settle down. They just adopted a dog and now, she’s talking about kids. He wanted to focus on hockey and feel free, without kids around.

He knew that he should put a ring on her finger. They’ve been together for so long and she deserved that, but he was scared. He wasn’t ready to be married. He wasn’t ready to have kids. That’s why, he decided to break up with her. He didn’t want to keep her behind with her plans. He knew how much raising a family means to her.

She couldn’t accept the fact that he’s breaking up with her over this. She wanted to fight for their relationship. Both were madly in love in each other, but Auston didn’t wanted her to regret staying with him when he’s prioritizing his career over their future life. Although, after thinking about it, she realized he’s right. Auston was keeping her from this. That’s why she agreed to split up. It was heartbreaking moment for them, but they knew it’s the best decision since they want different things.  

Yeah, we both found different love, and we’re movin’ on

After they broke up, Auston started hooking up with other women. Soon after, he fell in love with one of the girls. It wasn’t the same kind of love but still it was love for him. He moved on from his past relationship, but he could never forget her. He believed that she was the best thing that happened to him, but he knew, she never will be his again.

When she moved to Quebec City, she haven’t planned on looking for a new boyfriend. All she wanted was to heal. Through common friends, she met another guy. He was loving and caring towards her. When he asked her to be his girlfriend, she agreed. Even when she wasn’t feeling it in 100%, she was happy to have someone by her side.

I don’t want you ever to forget about us

She and Auston moved on, but the 8 years built them. They became the best version of themselves thanks to each other. Maybe they haven’t been together anymore, but they couldn’t forget about each other. Their love damaged them from having next relationships. She was comparing every guy to Auston and Auston was comparing every girl to her. With time, they realized they’ve made huge mistake by breaking up with each other but none of them wanted to reach to the other and try to get back together. They moved on but they haven’t forgot about each other.

[tigereyes45]

20 questions with a Fanfic Author

I got tagged by 3 separate people on 3 different days. XD Thank you for the tags @illegalpaladin , @ncc1701ohno , & @kcscribbler ! 1.How many works on Ao3?

As of right now I have 420 fics posted on Ao3. There will be about 80 if I ever get around to moving the rest of my fics over from ff.net (but I've been saying that I'll do that for years. XD )

Fun fact the last fic I posted was on March 12th, so a day before I got tagged the first time.

2. Total AO3 Word Count?

1,150,568

Wow, I find it hard to believe that I've written that much since first joining in 2015.

3. Top 5 fics by Kudos

Meeting the Team - 426 Kudos - Star Wars

Plo Koon takes a youngling Ahsoka to meet the Wolfpack before they become the squad known by their fierce fighting techniques and unshakable leader. Back when they were first being organized into a lethal force for the Republic.

2. Greed or Fear - 348 kudos - Ducktales (2017)

Donald and Scrooge have a conversation about Louie's own fascination with money.

3. Leaving - 329 kudos - Klaus

Instead of Klaus walking off on his own, Jesper was there to see it. He wasn't about to passively let his best friend disappear, but what could he do anyways.

4. The Calm Before the Storm - 315 kudos - Merlin BBC

Morgana has taken over Camelot with the help of her sister and their undead army. Arthur, Merlin, and the others take shelter within an abandoned castle. There they lick their wounds, and make plans for the fight. Merlin decides now is the best time to reveal a hidden truth.

5. Escaping Death Yet Again - 269 kudos - Mass Effect Original Triology

Wrex was quick to search and recover Shepard. Now he works to keep her survival a secret as his people looked for the Normandy. There's just a few problems with that.

1. The alliance wants her and Hackett suspects she's alive. 2. The mass relays and most of the technology-based around them are no longer functioning. 3. Keeping her alive. Where's Vakarian when he needs him?

4. What fandoms do you write for?

Ao3 has 82 different fandoms listed on my written for list. If I'm not counting the catch all fandom titles (such as Star Trek, or Dragon Age - all media types) then I've written for 73 fandoms. Though I could have messed my numbers out somewhere along the way.

Right now I'm writing a lot for Star Trek (big surprise), Transformers (I adore Ratchet), and Dragon Age (Varric, oh my heart).

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! For the most part. Sometimes on a multi-chap fic I'll try to wait until I have the next chapter out before responding (kind of serves as a notification method when people aren't bookmarking the story).

6. Angstiest Ending?

Man this is so hard to answer. I write a lot of angst. A lot of character death, and unaddressed feelings. Well dear readers, which fic of mine do you think has the angstiest ending? (I have a feeling it'd be one of the star trek fics. Maybe not but it's a feeling.)

7. Fic with the happiest ending?

Happy ending, what's that? Haha, probably From A Distance's ending. It's a Mass Effect Andromeda (Sara) Ryder/Tiran Kandros fic about the two getting together, and guess what? They actually do! XD No sudden deaths, or unspoken confessions or anything. The two save the day, end up together, and are sappy enough that it truly comes across how the whole pathfinder team is family.

8. Do you get hate?

Yeah. Not as much nowadays but back when I wrote Game of Thrones and Star Wars often, I got a lot. Usually people criticizing me for not editing more, or for posting about a specific ship here and there.

9. Do you write smut?

Once again this timing is funny to me because I only began writing smut a year ago (and only for Star Trek). I actually posted my first smut fic on March 20th, 2024. It was a TOS Mckirk fic that was an AU about if Kirk and co ended up stuck on the Return of the Archons planet. You can read it here:

As Archons

10. Do you write crossovers?

Yes! Not often but I do.

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

Uhhhh, hmm. Not as far as I'm aware. One time I found one of my fics posted on a russian website. They had translated and reposted it but with a link to my original fic, so it didn't bother me. I don't think my stuff has ever been outright stolen.

I prefer if people ask first, of course, but so long as my work is linked and credited I don't really mind if people translate it.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Actually yes! Multiple times! There was the one fic that was translated into Russian, and another when it was translated into Chinese. The russian fic was one of my Game of Thrones fics (if I'm remembering correctly), and the Chinese fic was the first Optiratch transformers fics I ever posted.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic?

Yes. Though I don't think either of them has ever been published.

14. All time favorite ship?

How could you ask me this? Don't you know this is the hardest question to answer?

Mcspirk, and Varric x Hawke, and Optiratch, and Janeway x Tuvok x T'pel, and Mariner x T'Lyn, and Cassandra x Jenkins, and so many many more. I have a different all time favorite ship for every different series, movie, and book I interact with.

15. WIPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have hope that I'll eventually finish all my WIPs.

16. Writing strengths?

Oh I don't know. I like to think that I'm good at invoking emotions within my fics. At the very least I hope I am.

17. Writing Weaknesses?

I am so bad at switching tenses out of nowhere. I think in all tense forms all the time in my head (and it makes sense to me) so I don't even notice when I do it in fics.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

I think when it's done consistently in a way readers can pick up on, then it's great characterization! I don't mind using a translator to know what's being said. However I'll never complain if the author wants to include what the word or dialogue is in the notes.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Oban Star Racers. I wrote 3 fics for this series on ff.net before writing a tmnt 2012 fic.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

A Scarcity of Comfort is by all measurements my favorite fic that I've ever written. I am still so proud of this fic to this day.

I wrote it after watching Star Trek V - The Final Frontier because I was so upset that it was Sybok who hugged McCoy after the scene about his father. It should have been Jim & Spock.

It's not my most viewed fic, and no where close to being my most commented on, or bookmarked fic, it doesn't even have as many kudos as some of my other star trek fics, but I am so damn proud of it. Probably the best thing I've ever written.

----

I'll tag @nalascat , @fernisworm , @greeneyedwildthing , @yellowmagicalgirl , @jenksel , and @aerialworms in case any of yal wanna do it. :)

[eedenuwu]

oc-tober | my first few days

hello tumbo ler. i am kinda doing oc-tober this year, kinda not. i know my schedule (busy, hectic, hell) but i also know i like to procrastinate (these 3 pieces have consumed time that would've been better used for homework).

so, i'm gonna jump into it... the other 2 drawings and more info will be below the cut

day 1 | favorite oc

ok so i started off strong here... by that i mean i started with day 1!!! (on october 5). this is my favorite ever. i have never really info dumped about this one on the internet before... was gonna use this as a time to start but then deleted what i just wrote LOLL all u gotta know is that bro is stunning witterawy just look. also this oc is from the 1920s/30s/40s... most of the story i've got in my head takes place in the 30s tho 😻

day 5 | redesigned oc

see this is what i mean. i skipped from day 1 to day 5.. but this is an oc i made when i was like 12 (WAY TOO CLOSE TO 10 YEARS AGO) and he was an angsty little bugger... it used to be the case that he was a witch living on his own in a village that, like, hates him or whatever. (because he's a witch.) the townsfolk like rip his tongue out or whatever and then he couldn't speak anymore but still ran like some sort of fruit stand at some sort of market. then like the love of his life moved in and he lived happily ever after. (not true, the love of his life was a BOY so i think they both got killed.)

and wow!!! that's a lot for a 12/13 year old. i came across an OLDDD google doc that had a little bit about this guy in it. the story, as anything written by a 12/13yo, made like. extremely little sense.

so i redesigned bro in about 2022ish. gave him a name, and he's still a witch. he's still missing a tongue. the differences now include that he's AFAB, has a little friend in his head only (pictured. he is cursed) and has a twin brother now. his twin brother works as a knight and like... captured him for an insane bounty. i also gave him a little bit of plot armor... he's some sort of telepath now so he's able to get by without a tongue. instead of straight up fantasy ville, i've been doing a little research into the middle ages to figure out a more, like, realistic setting... as realistic as including supernatural things can be but believe me the story is making a lot more sense now than it did in 2015.

day 3 | old oc

so i drew this today. yes these are in order of when i drew them...

anyway in terms of when i made this one, he's not THAT old. he's a product of my highschool mind and appeared on MANY assignments as doodles.. so he was like, essentially, born in about 2016/17, but i consider him old because i haven't so much as thought about him since like 2020, MAYBEEE early 2021.

this is also making me realize i have a thing for FREAKS. every one of these ocs has something about them that makes them "less than human;" this guy's deal is that he's like.. half fish..

it sounded really cool in 2017 you have to understand this was the vibe of the time

anyway he essentially got scrapped for no better reason than i was just getting bored. like, the story i was developing for bro ALSO took place in the 1920s (dude let me tell u. prohibition era america is actually my roman empire. genuinely in every sense of the real meaning of that trend) but it was diverging too far from reality and sort of becoming an atla knockoff toward the end of my thoughts for it... so then bro at the top was born (girl on day 1) in august 2021 and the rest for this guy was history. such is the damning reality of the creative.

anyway, that's all. i have no idea if i'll keep this up, but some of the prompts have genuinely given me ideas to cure my art block (I HAVE NOT DRAWN SINCE JULYYYYY) so i'm hoping to have time for more 🥲

[anamoon63]

Your TS3 gameplay really does inspire me to give that game another shot. Are there specific mods you use to make sure the game runs smoothly/is stable? What mods/cc are the best to use so the sims look good?

Hi, Marci! 😊

First of all, thank you very much for your ask. Knowing that my sims and/or my gameplay can inspire other simmers to play means a lot to me cause The Sims 3 is my favorite game in the whole Sims series. Plus, I love my sims, so this makes me twice as happy. 🤗💖

That said, it is my duty to warn you that The Sims 3 is not an easy game to maintain, it requires a lot of care and patience, even from the moment of its installation. You ask me what it takes to make it run smoothly and make it stable, well I'm no expert, but what helped me with that is all contained in this Steam post. I believe these tips you can follow even if you don't have your game on Steam. I followed all these steps when I reinstalled my game back in 2017-18, and I have never had a problem like lag or crashes since then.

It's thanks to the amazing person who wrote that post and to talented modders like @lazyduchess and Twallan (Nraas Mods), whose mods I consider indispensable, that I have been able to play The Sims 3 without problems for years now. I may have had a couple of crashes due to some wrong or corrupt cc, but that's on me because I download a lot of stuff. In those cases, it's a matter of locating the bad cc, taking it out, and that's it. The game runs great, even with a ton of mods installed. (I have a 9 GB mods folder, and I've had more than that at times, lol, but I try to keep in less than 10 GB always).

As for what mods and cc's to use to make the sims look good, well, that would depend on your taste, or as they say now, on the aesthetics of your game or your sims.

For what it's worth, I have always used Ephemera's E-WEAK skin as default. I also use some other Ephemera's like E-Skin Natural MIX, Asia and Fresh. I use some by Kurasoberina too.

I think Ephemera's site doesn't exist anymore, but the E-WEAK skins I use can be downloaded on MTS here. Kurasoberina TS3 skins you can find them here along with more of their fabulous content.

I'm sure there are other skins much newer, and super nice too, but these are the ones I use, cause they give my sims the look they are known for. 😊

Also I use Tifa N38 default eyes, as well as Buhudain's You Are Real body and face maps replacements to give some realism to my sims' skins/bodies. Neither Tifa's nor Buhudain's sites exist anymore, unfortunately, but you can still find Buhudain's archives on this SFS page. And those of Tifa in this other one in Mega. (I hope I am not doing wrong by sharing them, otherwise I will remove them).

There's also this stunning version of Buhudain's You are Real by @nectar-cellar named You are Hyperreal. :)

As for the rest, if I start listing all the other content I use such as hair, clothes and makeup I would never finish, I'd gladly share my whole mods folder, but I don't want to piss off the creators, or blow-up other players' computers, lol. I'm WCIF friendly, though, so feel free to ask for any specific content, of any type, CAS or Buy/Build, I got my custom content well documented, so I'll provide you with links to any of them.

For the time being, here is this link to my custom Content List on my Blogger. I have kept this list for many years, and I still use most of that content; it may be a little outdated of course, cause I have a lot of new stuff now, so my intention is to update the page soon when/if I have the time. Also, some of the links may not work anymore, if so just let me know and I'll fix them for you if I'm able.

I hope this answer has helped you. Sorry for taking so long to reply, but I wanted to make this post as detailed as possible. If you have any other questions about The Sims 3, I'll be here whenever you need me. Good luck and happy simming! 😉💗

[laurolive]

A Kiss that Made the Papers

Where were you in ‘82?

24 September 1982, London. A triple threat event: Linda’s 1st London photography exhibit, launch party for her 2nd photo book, and possible birthday party. Photo by Robert Rosen.

(See also The Guardian Archives 21 Sept 1982: First London exhibition for Linda McCartney. Although the article states that the events occurred on her 40th birthday, Linda was actually born in 1941; so this would have been her 41st birthday.)

“I got it!” recalled celebrity photographer Robert Rosen of the moment his camera captured a kiss between the McCartneys. “That photo went worldwide…” [link1, link2]

It instantly appeared on page 5 of the Friday 24 September 1982 issue of The Daily Mirror [link], complete with its own title and a little essay (reproduced below).

YESTERDAY… And after 13 years together a kiss is still something special for Paul and Linda by WILLIAM MARSHALL GENTLY, almost shyly, Paul McCartney kisses his wife, Linda. It happened at a party in London to launch Linda's latest book of photographs. The kiss is loving, sexual in a restrained kind of way, absolutely decent and breathes of a solid conventional marriage of four-square family values. The normal pattern for a multi-millionaire star like Paul would have been several divorces, a string o1 multi-coloured affairs, and a rapidly fraying life. Instead, McCartney, at 40 an enduring elder statesman in the ragamuffin rock world, beats a steady path into middle age with an ex-divorcee for a wife. They married more than 13 years ago. When I first met Paul twenty-odd years ago in the rackety, smokey music cellars of Liverpool he was a bright-faced kid for whom the world had suddenly been flung at at his feet — along with the rest of the Beatles. But even then, while all about him exploded into hysteria and chaos, he viewed the present and future with an eye like an experienced general before a battle. He came from a steady home background, adored his father and never subscribed to the passing whims and fancies that dictated that families, kids and lifelong marriages should be kicked out the door.

Takeaways

Paul doesn’t look so shy to me, ha ha (neither of them do).

An elder statesman of rock?? Beating a path to middle age?? But he’s only 40! And a young looking 40 at that. Let’s not call him an elder statesman until he gets some gray in his hair or until he reaches the titular age of 64, whichever comes last. On a more serious note, though, Marshall was probably speaking of generational impact rather than literal age. McCartney wrote more influential music before he turned 30 than most composers had written in a lifetime.

“… families, kids and lifelong marriages…” Count Mr. Marshall as a perceptive observer who could tell that what Paul and Linda had was a lifelong marriage — even at the relative “newlywed” stage of a mere 13 years. 😎

And Paul and Linda loved the photo. They have a copy. 💋

In a 20 Sept 2017 interview in I-D magazine [link], Rosen was asked which one of his photos he was really proud of. It was the Paul and Linda kiss photo, of course. Rosen says,

“I love the shot of Paul and Linda McCartney kissing. As soon as I had it developed I just thought, wow, I did that. I sent them a print but didn't hear anything more until a few months later, when, Paul and Linda turned up to a gallery event I happened to be at. At one point, Linda tapped me on the shoulder and said, 'Are you ignoring us?' She gave me a big hug and told me they loved the photo. That obviously meant a great deal to me.”

_____________________

[rms-mauretanic]

Something I think people don't appreciate enough is just how batshit insane Charles Lightoller's life was, because, for better or for worse, the man had incredible main character energy.

Most people probably know of him from the sinking of the RMS Titanic - he was the highest-ranking officer to survive, and he was the one that refused to let any men on the lifeboats (Jonny Phillips portrayed him in the '97 movie). When the ship went down, he got sucked into one of the ventilators but was trapped against a grate, then a blast of hot air blew him back to the surface, where he climbed onto an overturned lifeboat and spent the night coaching the others on the boat through keeping their balance until they were finally able to get into one of the other boats.

Since apparently that wasn't enough insanity for a single lifetime, here's some other completely normal and unremarkable facts about his life:

During his early career as a seaman, the ship he was on ran aground on a deserted island in the Indian Ocean and he (and the rest of the crew) was stranded for several days.

He tried his hand prospecting for gold in the Yukon (unsuccessfully). Then he became a cowboy.

He met his wife, Sylvia, while serving on the SS Suveic. She had a bad foot so he would help her up and down stairs, and they became close. He was apparently so upset about the idea of not seeing her again that some of the other officers just told him to marry her, which he did. They had five children, and by all accounts were very happy.

While serving on the HMS Garry during WWI, he sank German U-boat UB-110, then allegedly opened fire on the survivors, which he later admitted to in a memoir. He received a Distinguished Service Cross for this incident.

During WWII, he sailed his personal pleasure yacht, the Sundowner, to assist in the Dunkirk evacuation, during which he rescued 127 men. The character of "Mr. Dawson" in Christopher Nolan's 2017 film Dunkirk was inspired by him.

He wrote an autobiography called Titanic and Other Ships. I don't know why but I just find that title funny.

Please, do with this knowledge what you wish.

[reddanceragain]

Steve Wozniak and Elon Musk should, in theory, have a lot in common–two tech visionaries, each revolutionizing their respective industries. But while Apple built its empire on making things easier for users, Tesla, in Wozniak’s eyes, has been doing the exact opposite. Once an enthusiastic Tesla owner, the Apple co-founder has grown disillusioned with the company and its CEO, and now, he says, Musk has personally shut him out.

Wozniak says his X account was blocked after years of publicly criticizing Musk. He believes his outspoken remarks about failed promises and questionable business practices led to the sudden restriction—despite never violating platform rules.

In a post on Bluesky last month, Wozniak wrote:

"Over years, I have a few times called Musk a liar (across the country by 2016, then 2017) and thief (money for upgrades), on national TV even. Maybe that's why my Twitter account has been blocked for a few months despite violating no rules. I can't get it fixed."

Just days later, during a CNBC interview, Wozniak doubled down, recalling how Musk repeatedly promised Tesla's self-driving technology would be ready by 2016, then pushed it to 2017. He accused Musk of misleading customers and taking their money for software that never delivered.

"He lied to us about driving himself across the country by the end of 2016 and then by the end of 2017," Wozniak said. "And he got money from us—stole money from us—to try to upgrade to the one that would do it, when they wouldn't."

He described his frustration over losing access to X, saying he went through all verification steps but couldn't regain control of his account.

"I follow every single step to prove that I'm real, really who I am, and I can't get it unblocked," he said. "I don't know if they're doing that deliberately, but I never really posted on X, I never ever violated any rule or anything. But maybe it's because I was on the wrong side of Elon."

In 2014, Wozniak was one of Tesla's biggest fans. In an interview with NBC News, he spoke about the Tesla he and his wife had purchased, saying, "We love it more than any other car we have."

But that admiration didn't last. Over time, he's soured on its technology, calling Tesla's user interface "the worst in the world." He described how updates have made basic functions harder, like accessing the glove box or finding turn signals on the yoke steering wheel.

"Nothing makes sense in that car intuitively," he said. "You have to go searching in menus until you stumble into finding it—it's horrible."

Wozniak's account remains blocked, and he claims he hasn't received an explanation. Whether intentional or not, it's clear he believes his public criticism of Musk cost him access to one of the world's largest social media platforms.

===========

FB comment:

First of all, don't ever compare the two to each other ever again. Woz was and still is a visionary, whether he's with Apple or not. Musk was and always will be an opportunist, NOT a visionary. Most of the "visionary" stuff he spews was described decades ago by actual visionaries Like Arthur C. Clarke. He didn't "found" Tesla, regardless of what documents say, because it just isn't so. Every single F$%^&*ing idea he's had he stole from someone else. If you want to compare him to someone, try Thomas Edison.

Yes is old un-updated technology, SpaceX, while making some tangible strides in rocket launches, has failed far more than it has succeeded. The Raptor rocket engine is really well done, but not due to any Elon vision, the engineers the lead SpaceX are responsible for that. The reusable rocket launch vehicle (1st stage only) was the idea of a high school student.

The Boring Co. uses decades old technology. He only formed the company to support his HyperLoop wet dream that is officially dead in the water for years now. His only goal there was to get California to drop their High Speed Rail system between LA and SF. He delayed it for sure, but the rest of the world is far ahead of us in every aspect of transportation, INCLUDING high speed rail service that is actually high speed, reliable, cost effective and affordable for riders between major anchor cities.

His satellite "WEB" is a means of information control, nothing more. Canada, Mexico and Brazil have all cancelled current and future contracts. The Steves saw a rudimentary GUI at Xerox's PARC laboratory and refined it for the Apple II and Macintosh lines. Bill Gates was late to that party as well, even though he saw the GUI demo at the same time, because he really didn't know how to make it work.

Until the 2000's, Windows was always operating on top/in front of MS-DOS. It was always very clunky and inefficient compared to Apple's OS. Musk's claim to fame was a very rudimentary video game and Pay-Pal. He claimed to be a master gamer but has been exposed as a charlatan in that arena as well.. His Ketamine induced wet dreams are all really failures, even his CyberTruck. Full self driving using just visual cameras will never be "a thing" and the rest of the world has already moved far beyond that.

[tameimpala222]

My short ‘…Ready For It?’ lyric analysis and how it’s definitely about Harry:

The line about the girls he had loved and left fits her description of him in the 1989 vault songs, especially ‘Is It Over Now?’ with the models and Taylor clones he has been sleeping with.

The haunted and ghost line?!?! That is a 1989 staple line, on reddit I saw someone making a whole ass data sheet about the amount of times she says ghosts-related terms in all of the albums and 1989 had the highest ratio/percentage compared to the rest. Also, Harry’s ‘Two Ghosts’?!?!?

Ghosts = haylor.

“Some boys trying to hard, he don’t try at all” = similar to lyrics in ‘Slut’, “In a world of boys, he’s a gentleman”.

“Younger than all my exes but is such a man” = Harry is her youngest ex (let’s pretend she forgot about Conor Kennedy and it wasn’t a true ex anyway). Joe is older than Harry. Checkmate.

Wildest dreams tea, also I had this theory that they secretly went to an island in 2016, when they still had their situationship going on.

Idk about that robber and heist line but it’s definitely not about Joe lol. Sounds like she’s painting herself as a criminal and him gladly joining along. Like… eloping. Or running away from a crime.

Burton and Taylor is about Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor, known for their on-off intense relationship that spanned years. Is she talking about Joe, who she only knew at best for 6 months? (album was released Nov 2017 but she only got with Joe in Sept 2016 and she probably wrote the song earlier). OFC NOT.

The themes in this song does not match all the Joe-confirmed songs about him later too. We can only surmise, she’s singing about another dude.

‘Every love I’ve known in comparison is a failure, I forget their names now’ - Taylor’s being annoying and hyperbolic when she wrote this (don’t take her seriously) but yeah that’s why you are still writing about Harry in 2022 with Question..? and Maroon. Also I’m pretty sure she forgot about Conor, Calvin, Tom Hiddleston, and most of the dudes she dated before Harry.

Games = their on-off situationship. I said what I said.

There it is, my 5 minute song lyric analysis. Hope y’all are enlightened.

[feral-balatron]

Dont know who needs this, but heres something i wrote about my expierence with DID

Happiness. Something I haven’t felt in almost a decade. Feels like ages. But at the same time it feels like it was just yesterday. Trauma is something that happens to everyone in some capacity, some more than others. And the way that a single experience can completely shatter someone is mesmerizing. All it takes is one day, but the effects last for the rest of your life. Trauma can do a number of things to you. Some people see that same thing, over and over again in their mind’s eye like a broken record. Haunting them. Some people turn defensive, seeing everybody as a potential threat. And some people become multiple people. When you are a child, your personality has not yet solidified. And when a child experiences extreme or repeated trauma at such a young age, it can stunt the growth of your sense of self, creating multiple personalities.

This is a disorder known as dissociative identity disorder, also known as multiple personality disorder. And it’s excruciating. Dissociative identity disorder, or DID for short, is the most intense form of post-traumatic stress disorder you can suffer from. It’s the brain’s last resort to protect you from harm. With these new personalities, or alters, come amnesiac barriers. Memories get split up between them, and whenever one of them does something like, for example, brushing their teeth, nobody else will have a memory of that. Which can make it extremely difficult to keep up on work, hygiene and general self-care. In this example, you might keep brushing your teeth over and over again because you can’t remember doing it, even though you already did. 

Another thing that comes with this disorder is dissociation. Essentially, feeling disconnected. Either from your life, your body, your friends or family. And it can often make time feel very blurry, like no time has passed even though it has. This makes it hard to be happy, because to you, it’s 2017 and you're 7 years old. You live with your mom and your cat Nala in an apartment building in a nice neighborhood. But in reality, it's 2024, you’re 14, soon going to high school, and you live somewhere else with your mom, stepdad, and his son. Nala is dead and you have a new cat, as well as two guinea pigs. You go to a new school, where you don’t know anyone. You’re in an unfamiliar place and you don’t know how you got here.

Wouldn’t that be terrifying?

Well let me tell you, it is. Feeling trapped somewhere you don’t belong is absolutely dreadful, and with the flow of time pulling you ever further from where you want to be just makes everything feel hopeless. And being in this state makes it so much easier to completely shut down after the smallest of inconveniences. Because even if it’s just a small thing, adding it onto your plate already full of stuff that you already can’t handle is so overwhelming. And when you reach that breaking point, it’s terrifying to know that you aren’t the only one making irrational decisions. Because your alters are also stressed. They’re also sad. They’re also in control of your body. And anything they do will look like your choice. So if they decide to break things, wreck your house, harm yourself, harm others, in the eyes of everyone else that was you. The constant fear of finally snapping is suffocating, because at any moment someone else could come out and do something that would completely ruin your life. 

And even if your life is going kind of alright at the moment, you’re feeling good about where you are. They might have other feelings, and a lot of the time, they’ll take it out on you. Because to them, it’s your fault. So no matter what you do to appease them, they taunt you. Telling you that your stupid, that your to blame, that you don’t deserve any of the happiness that you feel, that you should just kill yourself. 

And if you’re already suffering from depression or anxiety or with these kinds of thoughts, having a constantly present voice in your head yelling these things at you can really make you start to believe it’s true. Maybe I am stupid, it is all my fault, I don’t deserve happiness, maybe I should just kill myself.

But you don’t. You’re too scared. You don’t have the courage, you're not strong enough, you're not smart enough, you're not brave enough. You're not good enough.

Dissociative identity disorder and its other manifestations are a horrible, terrible and constant suffering. Because once upon a time, almost a decade ago, something bad happened to you. And you suffer the consequences of that bad event every single day. Something you had no choice in, something you didn’t ask for, and it completely mutilated the life that you had before. But at the end of the day,

you can’t change it. You can’t change what happened, you can’t make it better, you just have to live with it. You have to cope with it, you have to deal with it. You just have to try and make the best of it. 

And even if the best isn’t as good as you think it could be, you’re still here. You’re still alive, you’re still surviving, and you’re okay. Dissociative identity disorder is your brains, albeit flawed, way of protecting you. So even if you wish you’d never even been born, you were. And I can guarantee that at some point, you’ve felt happiness and joy. And that makes it all worth it. Finally being able to feel again is a hard thing to achieve, but once you do, the cloudy skies seem to clear up, showing off the beautiful rainbow left behind by the storm. 

DID, OSDD, and PTSD are hard to live with. But you’re doing it. And that’s beautiful.

[raccoonfallsharder]

the raccoon, the witch, & the roadtrip. part three. illinois. wisconsin. minnesota.

the raccoon, the witch, & the roadtrip masterlist previous | next | main masterlist

angst, comfort, friendship, & fluff for @hibatasblog rocket & wanda | part 3/6 | word count: 1680.

night falls on the outskirts of chicago. wanda and rocket reflect on the horrors of the universe.

During a watch party for Avengers: Endgame on Twitter, Markus revealed the idea to team Wanda with the Guardian of the Galaxy captain actually made it into several versions of the film's script. "We had whole drafts with Wanda on a road trip with Rocket," Markus wrote, "but after the Vision plot in Infinity War, nothing we came up with was anything but wheel spinning for her character." CBR

references dialogue from All-New Guardians of the Galaxy Issue #4 - 6/21/2017

At Rocket’s urging, they’d stopped in a weird little convenience-and-fuel shop that the witch had called a rest stop, and he’d sneaked in behind some other humies and poked through the variety of chargers, converters, headphones, and other piecemeal tech that the rest stop had available for travelers to buy.

He’d emptied his pockets once they’d gotten back on the road and Wanda had looked at him with a crease between her brows. 

“How did you buy all that?” she’d asked, lips pursed. She always has big eyes, but they’d seemed even bigger then, and he hadn’t been able to quite clock what her expression had meant.  

So he’d just snorted. “Do I look like I carry Terran cash?”

Again, something in the corner of her mouth had flickered.

He’d been able to spend most of Indiana peeling apart wires and twisting them into one, breaking apart plastic hulls, and snapping together pieces of metal. 

“Natasha’s going to kill you,” Wanda tells him when he pries off the plastic facade protecting the wiring for all the fancy controls on Nat’s dashboard.

He shrugs. “Not if she can’t catch me.”

The witch makes that little puff of sound again. “Just — don’t mess with anything but the sound system,” she tells him. “I’m not making this drive without climate control and blinkers.”

He snorts, then points to a little heating coil the size of an old Kree Imperial coin. “What about that? Can I fuck with that?”

She glances over. “The cigarette lighter? Sure.”

It barely takes him any time to hook up the zune, and it’s crooning through Nat’s speakers by the time they hit the outskirts of Chicago. The sun’s long dropped behind the horizon by then, and he tells her they should hole up for the night.

“Danvers ain’t in that much of a rush,” he tells her. “We can take a break. Get some sleep.”

The witch doesn’t seem the least bit concerned about sharing a room with him, which is nice, because most of the time he feels like he’s gotta be on his guard with these baldbodies. He’s fairly certain at least half of the Avengers ain’t got any frickin’ respect for him or Nebs, and it’s frankly demoralizing.

But here he is, sharing a room with the witch. He’s never been one for regular sleep, and he’s got this thing with nightmares he doesn’t really want to inflict on Wanda. So he stays up most of the night, propped dozily against the headboard and fucking around on a datapad. The witch, for her part, pretends to watch some show on the two-dimensional Terran holovid-projector — primitive — then turns it off and pretends to sleep.

Pretends.

He tilts his head down at his datapad and wonders whether or not he should tell her that he can hear her heartbeat. It hasn’t dropped down to a relaxed, drowsy rate yet — in fact, sometimes he can hear it picking up, just for a minute. He wrestles with himself for a good fifteen minutes before he sighs and gets up, crossing the room to lean against the wall with the window. The witch is facing it, and he knows she can sense him, even though her eyes are closed. He leans back against the wall-mounted climate control unit, crossing his arms across his chest and his legs at the ankle while he waits for Wanda give up her silly charade.

It only takes about twenty seconds of him staring at her with one brow raised before she opens her eyes. They’re glowing as blood-crimson as his in this light — but where Rocket knows that his are made of reflective eyeshine, throwing back the flat light from the cracked bathroom door, hers are lit from the inside: whirling firestorms that would light up like furious beacons on even the most lightless of planets. 

He tries to curl the corner of his mouth in a way that says he’s unimpressed, but it’s a lie, and he’s never been good at lying.

“F’you’re not gonna sleep…”

She sighs and sits up, then rises, moving toward him so quickly that he startles: arms unfolding to defend himself, ears flickering flat. But she just comes and pulls the heavy curtains back, staring out into the distance. The glow of the city sits on the horizon, pinned with gemstone-lights. She leans forward, elbows propper on the window sill and hands on her chin.

“I don’t sleep much,” she says quietly.

He hesitates, then leaps nimbly onto the armchair on her other side, so he can peer out the window too.

“Yeah, well, you’re in good company,” he concedes after a moment. “Not sure how anybody does, to be honest.”

She snorts delicately at that, and he startles again. It’s the first time he’s seen that much life out of her — not counting her barely-banked outrage when he’d first called her boyfriend a robot, or the deadly-looking glow in her eyes a few moments ago.

“They think you can look away from the horrors of the universe,” she says emotionlessly, then shrugs. “I suppose—”

“No,” he interrupts flatly. “You can’t.”

She’s silent, and he doesn’t say anything either. They stare out toward the city for longer than Rocket knows — and to be honest, he’s only partly paying attention: sunk moodily into the horrors that plague his own mind. When he shakes himself – fur rippling from nose to tailtip — he’s reminded that he’s not alone. The witch looks as distant as he probably had. He’d been wondering — ever since the Snap — why she’d seemed so separate from her fellow Avengers, but he figures he gets it now. They’re an annoyingly optimistic bunch and she — she’s got her own horrors, too. 

She sighs, and stretches: hands gripping the sill, back arched like a cat. “Well,” she reasons. “If neither of us are sleeping, maybe we should get on the road?”

They stop at a roadside diner with outdoor seating and even though the sun is only blushing up the eastward horizon, Wanda insists on eating outside. She’s not trying to get in a situation where someone tells them that Rocket can’t be in a restaurant. She doesn’t have the energy to deal with his fury at the — well, the injustice of it. 

Because he’s not an animal. She’s still not sure exactly what he is, but he’s not an animal. She thinks again of his voice in the darkness beside her in the still-dark hours of the morning:

No, you can’t.

All of the Avengers do it, to some extent or another. Look past some of the horrors. She supposes it’s how they survive.

But she can’t.

She hasn’t been able to look away since she’d been trapped under that bed with Pietro, staring at the Stark Industries missile. She’s been waiting for death ever since. Now, under a rose-and-lavender sky with Rocket, she suddenly realizes that this is why it had been so easy to believe in Ultron’s promises.

Ultron hadn’t been able to look away, either. 

She supposes now that killing people is perhaps the wrong way to deal with it, but she still understands the broken heart at the core of the whole aching dilemma.

She’d started to take her eyes off it, once — the Stark Industries missile and everything else that came after. She’d started to lose sight of all that misery in the softness of Vis’ eyes, and now — now there’s nothing to distract her.

She just wants to look in his eyes again, instead of at — everything else.

But here’s Rocket, and he — she thinks maybe he understands. Strange, that she would find someone else so like her. It apparently took billions of lightyears’ worth of travel and some sort of — of alien mutation or something, but here he is.

They take breaks in Rochester and Sioux Falls, and listen to almost every song on the zune, including repeats from yesterday. Rocket picks up earpods and batteries and a dozen other small devices at every rest stop they pause at, and she doesn’t ask how he gets a hold of them. He tears them apart beside her, legs still swinging in the seat, and she imagines stopping somewhere and picking up a child’s carseat for him. There’s a curl in the corner of her mouth before she recognizes the feeling of it, and it startles her — to know that she’s still capable of smiling.

Rocket reconfigures the little devices into strange combinations that she’s sure are somehow purposeful, seemingly none-the-wiser in regards to her errant, probably-insulting thought and her first smile in years. The quiet between them feels oddly companionable. 

“Rocket,” she says, sometime between stops. “What is this mission Carol gave you, anyway? I need to know how I’m supposed to help you.”

He shrugs, focused on the now-unidentifiable piece of tech in his hands. It moves so fast — flashing metal and chipped plastic, little bundles of wires. “Gettin’ me there’s good enough, sweetheart,” he mutters, then flinches at the same time she shoots him a startled, sideways stare. “Sorry,” he mumbles, grimacing. 

She puts her eyes back on the pavement, the broken white lines sliding quickly beneath and beyond them. “That’s fine,” she says quietly, and he offers a half-shrug.

“Know Nat hates when I call her that,”  he admits, still focused on whatever he’s making. Another quick glance tells her his ears are flattened, though. “Try not to.” She can feel him hesitate before he flashes a sharp grin into her periphery. “Prob��ly can’t just keep calling you witch, though.”

She snorts before she can stop herself: a broken half of a chuckle, rusty and unused. “Why not?” she asks, and he snickers under his breath as the trees go by and the zune repeats another song through his makeshift adapter.

“I think calling her sweetheart is going to be the least of your concerns once she sees how you’ve messed with her car,” Wanda adds, and when he cackles, it pulls something answering out of her lungs: cherry-blossom-bright and unfamiliar, and real. The laugh feels strange in her mouth, absent so long she’d forgotten the petalled shape of it.

Both of them abruptly fall quiet, the sounds of Joan Jett curling through the speakers.

“Did you just—?” Rocket asks, the words crackling off at the end, and Wanda’s hands tighten on the wheel.

“Yes,” she says quietly, although the startle is still in her voice. “I did.”

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[desert-dyke]

20 Questions for Fanfic Writers

No one asked me to do this, but I saw this from @ashenlavellan and wanted to give it a try!

1). How many works do you have on AO3?

26 works

2). What's your total AO3 word count?

78,479 words! (holy smokes!)

3). What are your top 5 works by kudos?

Nuclear Protection on a Budget (Fallout 4) - 153 kudos

Pictures of You (Mass Effect) - 135 kudos

I was Lost without You (Mass Effect) - 134 kudos

I'm No Botanist But I Think this May Not Be Entirely Natural - (Fallout New Vegas) - 133 kudos

The Years are Long but it's Always Good to See a Familiar Face (Dishonored) - 133 kudos

4). What fandoms do you write for?

I mainly write fic about various video games I love (currently Mass Effect, Fallout, Dishonored, Prey 2017, We Happy Few and Bioshock). I have in the past written fic about my dungeons and dragons OC, and very occasionaly fics based on books (one was a gift for a friend based on his science fiction series, which he liked so much it is secretly canon)

5). Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I really try to! If I don't, it's because I get overwhelmed and forget. Comments mean so much to me! Comments have motivated me to continue writing in certain fandoms and/or fics, so if you like something I do, please tell me! It 100% will convince me to write more!

6). What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably "Early Sunsets" (Dishonored) which is a missing scene fic of a character discovering the canon death of another character

7). What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I feel like my Tali/FemShep fics are the happiest, usually exploring Shepard getting more into Tali's culture and discussing their future together post war (So either "TLC", "Pictures of You" or "Free as the Dust in the Solar Wind") (omg I somehow didn't realize until now I've written THREE Tali/FemShep fics!)

8). Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't and hope to keep it that way.

9). Do you write smut?

Probably half, if not more, of my fics are smut. It's something I don't have opportunity to write outside of fanfiction, so fanfiction is my go to place for flexing that creative muscle.

10). Do you write crossovers?

No, to each their own, but I don't understand the appeal of crossovers. A lot of my fanfic is as close to canon as I can make it (while maybe changing bits of canon I dislike lol), so mostly I find crossovers confusing.

11). Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not.

12). Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I am so down to have my work translated if anyone is interested!

13). Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I haven't. I don't really have friends in the fanfic community tbh.

The closest to co-written I've done is when I opened up for requests and two of my published fics are prompts given by two different friends on tumblr!

14). What's your all-time favorite ship?

Currently, it's Alex Yu/Dayo Igwe (Prey 2017) partially because Prey is my new shiny thing to play with, and partially because I think I am the only person creating content for this particular ship. The longer I write the ship, the more convinced I make myself it is canon. Previously, it was Corvo/Daud (dishonored) because they're just so doomed to be together and to fall apart. I also always thought Garrus/FemShep (Mass Effect) was my top Mass Effect ship but now I am seeing unrefutable evidence that actually I've written more Tali/FemShep lol!

15). What's the WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Guys I promise I will finish "Mad About the Boy" (Fallout New Vegas) (And my most recent fic). It was supposed to be a one shot but then I got distracted after one sex scene and decided to publish what I had and work on the rest when I get to it.

I don't often do multi chapter fics. The only other published WIP I have is "Her Heart I Bathed in Poison" (dishonored) a fic of the Knife of Dunwall told from Billie's perspective with Billie/Delilah as the main ship. Definitely lack of interaction on the fic made me lose interest as well as how long it needs to be. I don't think I'll be revisiting it anytime soon, unless I replay the DLC and become obsessed again.

16). What are your writing strengths?

I think I do unique and complex inter-character dynamics really well, which is generally the focus of all my fics. I love exploring character relationships. I love making it messy and picking apart character's motivations. I think I stay in character very well.

I think I'm also good at using established worldbuilding within my fics.

17). What are your writing weaknesses?

When it comes to fanfic, I tend to rush through it. I don't edit my fanfic nearly enough. And overall, I favor working on my original fiction over fanfic these days.

18). Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

Closest I've come to doing this was writing a Scottish accent for Ollie in Life's Little Joy's (We Happy Few) and honestly I fear I butchered it.

19). First fandom you ever wrote for?

On Archive of Our Own, my first published fic was for Dishonored. Before then, I have a regrettably long history writing and participating in the boy wizard fandom.

20). Favorite fic you've ever written?

I think "Monday, March 15th 2032" (Prey 2017) is prob the best fic I've written quality wise.

[watermelonsugacry]

OK I HAVE SO MANY THINGS I WANNA TALK 2 U ABOUT SO HERE IS ME RANTING AND PUTTING QUESTIONS:

I lovehe relationship yn has w the tomlinsons😫 like how she has a secrete handshake with the twins and how lottie is like her little sister and LOUIS IS LITERALLY A DREAM FRIENDSHIP

I have this thing where i like to think that yn was a big fan of paramore, and she also wrote some hits like only exeption (it just screams her and also it reminds me of how she would feel abt harry)

I also see her writing 'girl crush' when harry and taylor were dating and then saling it in 2014 but idk thats just me

And am i the only one who sees a PERFERT friendship between her and jennifer lawrence??

OK NOW I GOT SOME QUESTIONS SO HOPE THEY'RE NOT TOO MUCH

Whats the readers networth? Like i know that shes rich but how rich🤔

On a scale of 1-10 how famous is she? Like comparing to a big celebrity like Beyonce is she just as famous or..?

Whats her favorite colour?

Who is more clingy, harry or her?

Besides harry and louis who is her bestfriend that she hangs out w the most

What are some celebrities that got a crush on her and who has made that public

The weeknd has a song 'the party & after party' and it kind of sounds that hes describing a girl like yn "with your louis v bag, tats on your arms, high heels shoes make you 6 feet tall.." so are there some speculations ab this from the fans?

AND LAST is the reader the teaser in the relationship or does harry like to make fun of her more? ( srry if theres any mistakes)

IM ALWAYS DOWN FOR THIS LOVIE 💚

same!! they're family 🥰

funny enough, i actually picture a lot of paramore's music to be the music that yn would make with her band when she was in high school!

in the 1d!yn universe, she wrote Girl Crush!! (I remember talking about it a while ago on here but I forgot what year she wrote & sold it lol)

I don't know much about jennifer lawrence but thats an interesting pair 👀

I'll base it off of ariana grande's net worth at 240 million. But we all know that no number can amount to her actual worth 💅

I'd say that on a scale of 1-10, she's about an 8. She's a household name and an absolute force to be reckoned with. She's the type of famous that she forgets that she is and she'll record herself reacting to tiktoks lying down in bed, make-up free, and just lose her mind laughing. Or there was another time when she took herself out on a brunch date bc Harry went out to play golf that morning. Two girls approached her table and politely greeted her, said how much they loved her and had tickets to see her show that night. But before they could leave, YN invited them to sit with her and spent the rest of the morning eating and chatting with them.

Her favorite color is lavender 💜

Harry is the more clingy of the two! He's always the one who lays himself on top of her when she's about to get out of bed. When they arrive at the stadium he's going to perform at, her hand is constantly intertwined with his. When she's doing some last-minute rehearsals and sound checks, he's sitting at the edge of the room as he watches her work while still giving her her space. Or when she's in her home studio, he insists that she sits in his lap as she works because he's missed her all day, promising that he won't be a distraction to her (even though he totally is). And don't get it twisted, she can be clingy too sometimes; she's just better at hiding it.

Her other good friends that she hangs out with whenever she can are: Abel (the weeknd), Perrie Edwards, and Alisha Davies (an old friend from Doncaster turned choreographer).

oh my gosh where do I even begin?! There's a couple that initially come to mind: Matt Healy, Alex Turner, and Taron Egerton. For some reason, I can hear Matt say in an interview: "YN YLN is totally fit. Yeah, she's a fucking babe she is."

OOO definitely! Fans from both fan bases had speculated that they might have dated in 2017 (they didn't) bc that's when they hung out in public for the first time. Some people still speculate that Abel might have a crush on her til this day.

I'd say they share the teasing role. She throws playful jabs at him left and right, but she's the one who helped coax out that side of him. While they tease one another behind closed doors ALL the time, their favorite time to make fun of each other is at each other's shows.

[thelioncourts]

Can I ask what it is that bought you into the books? When did you first read them and why they’ve stuck with you for so long? ♥️

oh god, I'll try to make this as succinct as possible because it has the potential to be long and rambly ;; lol

my parents named me after kirsten dunst in iwtv (long, tom cruise-centered story behind that) and I knew this most of my life. I thought it was so cool that I was named after a 'vampire' and finally at age 15 I decided it was time to read the book my name (kind of) came from. I didn't know anything about iwtv, but I had looked up a movie trailer for it and was a little put off by all the blood - yes, I know/knew they were vampires - but ! I decided to persist. I got my hands on a shitty 1990s copy of iwtv, got it just in time for october, went to a park by my house to read it for a bit, and ended up sitting there for 6 hours and read the whole thing in one go.

I was so obsessed. did I understand it all? no. but I had loved it.

got my hands on a copy of tvl, started reading it, hated it, put it down with no intention of reading it anymore. had an older friend from a fandom I was in at the time learn about me reading AR and she was like, 'Kirsten, you have to keep reading tvl. just read until the wolves' so a couple months later - now 16 years old - I reread iwtv and then finally read tvl. and I loved it. of course. read QotD soon after and then stopped reading the series, and I think ?? looking back at it, I quit because there were too many characters in QotD that I didn't care about and I didn't want to keep reading lol but I have reread iwtv at least once every single year since I read it at age 15.

in 2018, when I had just graduated undergrad, anne announced on her facebook page that 'blood communion' was coming out in october. I decided then and there that I wanted to read it so I had to read the whole series. over the span of 3 months, I read the entire vampire chronicles in anticipation for 'blood communion' and was ready for it come october

after reading the whole series, I've read them all at least once more, most of them a couple of times more, and ??? I have a lot of complex feelings on the series tbh (especially after getting older and continuing my literary degrees and, to be hoenst, with the show's existence) but I think a huge reason they have resonated with me, a huge reason I was so looking forward - for YEARS - to a television show of this series, and to have a show that exceeds all expectations mean so much to me, is because of grief, perseverance, and love.

I know the book iwtv gets a lot of flak and I won't ever say that it's undeserved because. well, I've read it. I get it. but one thing about the novel iwtv that is so important to me, one thing that makes it my favorite of the whole series, is that it is so raw in its sadness, in its grief; the feelings of that novel can never, nor should ever, be replicated. anne's grief at the loss of her daughter is so palpable and it's incredible how she came up with this concept of an immortal child who should never die but inevitably dies as an equivalent to that. it's incredible how the death of claudia does shape the entire series to come, even if she wrote this first novel in the 1970s and wasn't done until almost 2020.

and tvl is so good because it is a story of persevering through suffering, of finding happiness even when it shouldn't be possible, of making the most of moments. the whole series really is, as a whole, persevering through suffering, especially as louis does, eventually, in the books find peace. even if it takes a while.

the rest of the books are questionable almost fully, but each one has at least one moment of something beautiful, whether it's beautiful love, grief, horror, etc.

when anne sold the books to make a tv show in 2016/2017, I was !! so ecstatic. I hadn't read the whole series by that point, ofc, but I loved louis and lestat, I loved them so much, and the idea of seeing them was everything, especially because they DO kiss in tvl and their romance is so important to tvl and QotD. I waited for years for the show to make it to tv, and had definitely lost hope sometime in 2019. I remember talking to a friend about how 'I'll believe it when I see it' because it just kept getting delayed.

and I'm so glad it did. because it getting delayed for whatever reasons meant rolin jones got to showrun it and meant sam reid and jacob anderson got the roles of lestat and louis and meant that a combination of all of that, plus the knowledge of how the series ends, made them center loustat as the only couple for each other, as this undeniable and beautiful and all-consuming thing. the show is more than anything I ever dreamed of, and it makes me appreciate the existence of the books in a lot of ways because without them we wouldn't have the show that we have now. like yes, a lot is different, but if they weren't written at all this wouldn't be here to improve drastically on the source material.