#i wouldnt want to live off that but def a nice thing to have once in a while.. hehe..

[todayisafridaynight]

DESPITE EVERYTHING I did have a blast watching you play Pain Simulator 2021 <3 Personally <3 Excited for next time! It's only uphill from here!!!

Also some other stuff I wanted to follow up on from the stream (if I'm forgetting something. Well. We get there when we get there):

Omoinotake - Moratorium is the music video I meant... IDK if it fits as a song It's Not About That but literally every other frame is a pose I want to draw AraSawa in... (also the "take" in Omoinotake is the same kanji as Jo and I'm prrrrretty sure this is the theme for a thing where a patriarch falls in love with a subordinate so Lol)

HOSTESS HEAT ACTION GIF LOCATED

You see what I mean. Look at how far he has to bend down to headbutt Kiryu. He's probably standing on SOMETHING I don't think he's this tall normally but my man lookin' Large...

At any rate... enjoy your rice balls <3

LMAO I HOPE IT WASNT TOO TRAGIC TO WATCH at some point when i encounter a 'dead run' i just gotta switch it up to chatting more which. I Think I Tried but w/e POINT IS NEXT RUN'LL BE BETTER. DEF MODIFYING MY NOTES AS WE SPEAK

AND I SEE WHAT YOU MEAN BOUT THE MUSIC VIDEO i see the vision 1000%.......

GIF SPOTTED YAAAAA rbing it right after posting this. need to have it easy access..

WHY IS HE SO FUCKIN TAALLLLL ACTUAL dbz broly height thats fucked up (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

[emetkoto]

idk man I just really like your style of rambling about them ig? like I find peoples' enthusiasm for things very sweet and infectious sometimes and your emetkoto posts defs hit that spot for me? like your joy and love for them seeps through and infects me too it's great. emetkoto good. anyway tell us about after vauthry. do it. give us the deets.

well thank you very much, it makes me happy to hear that ive had that effect on you 🥺🥺🥺 thats exactly what i hope to do with my posts about them but i do have bad demon brain so sometimes im like hmm. 'am i just being unbearably annoying instead actually???' and ofc sometimes its 'oh this is not original at all nobody wants to read this' so its always nice to have a little reassurance like this ghsljgsfd….

cracks my fingers so hard they all break anyway now for that essay you asked for

RIGHT SO LIKE right before vauthry, literally the night before that fight is when emet selch takes k'oto to the tempest to marry him and seubsequently erase his memory of it to "keep things fair" or whatever (basically he still had tiny little pangs of doubt about how things would turn out bc of yknow the whole being tempered for 12k+ years situation and he wanted to make sure that if it like. came to them having to fight. k'oto wouldnt hesitate bc he had smth like that holding him back :,) little did he know that he tried to hesitate in the end anyway and was only stopped from sparing him by ardbert) but thats a whole like other thing i still have to finish writing the worlds longest stupidest hardest to read post about so im physically restraining myself from going on about this anymore right this moment as much as i want to repeat myself forever about it bc GOD. God. god.

but anyway he was full of love and hope for k'oto, so much hope that he would be able to hold the light and prove mankinds worth so he could lay his mission to rest and stay by his side (and undo the spell holding his memories of the wedding) he was so SO ready for it and then. it just. all came crashing down :,) he'd allowed himself to let his guard down and put his duty aside and have hope in humanity again one last time and fall in love and k'oto just couldnt do it! even with his subtle help holding the light back he couldnt handle it, he was still too weak at 7 rejoinings and that shit hurted bad!!! he succumbed to the tempering and grief and rage and disappointment and closed himself off again…from there its probably the more canon adjacent bit of their story, graha tia acting embarassment, back to the tempest (altho k'oto doesnt remember having been there once before AUGH), amaurot, dying gasp :,)

throughout it all k'oto is trying desperately to get him to listen to him again but emet selch keeps cutting him off and ignoring him which hurts A LOT and ofc he says some. mean things to try and get him to just leave it be and accept what has to be done and stop talking about it bc HE didnt wanna think about it anymore EITHER obviously here but k'oto doesnt give up he keeps trying all the way to the very end….he never planned to kill emet selch, he just wanted to weaken him enough that he would take a moment to stop and think and listen , a last ditch effort to fix things but ardbert (and everyone else really) saw that it was like. too late for that. there was no way in hell emet selch was hearing reason anymore and if k'oto let him live there was a pretty high chance he would just kill him when he tried to get close to him so he took control of his body and made sure that axe killed, oops! way to kill a dudes soulmate and then be absorbed into his soul so you can never actually apologize for it…when the dust settled and k'oto realized what had happened he. was. A MESS!!

the only thing stopping him from breaking down right away was emet selch shushing him like 'let me enjoy this last moment with you in peace and quiet'……remember us and all that (although 'us' had a very obvious double meaning here

anyway tldr; WEHHHHHHH,,,,,,,

sorry for unreadability i very much wrote it exactly as it came out of my brain which is a long run on thought with no consideration for line or paragraph breaks. i tried to turn it into a few chunks for you

[uwumessenger]

random headcanons i have for each om! character teehee

hi it's been a while since ive posted some hcs bc uni has been kicking my a$$! luckily i only have a few papers to tidy up and im done. here r some hcs for each obey me character that ive accumulated over the past few months wink wonk

most are random but some constants you'll find are what i think they smell like, languages they can speak (other than their native (demon/angel) and eng/jp), and music tastes !

lucifer

i have a strong feeling that he showers twice a day: in the morning after waking up and at night before going to bed

his cologne is probably the type that will last in an elevator for like a week after he uses it once. i dont think this mf ever smells like anything other than his cologne

has a secret folder on his phone of semi-nudes and other scandalous pics from when he felt sexy at the time omg

aside from demon language/eng/jp he can speak french and knows latin

listens to classical stuff yea but he also listens to diavolos mixtapes (re: diavolo's section)

not a fan of sweets but will eat sweet things when craving

really bland sense of humor...borderline cringey 😭✋🏻

mammon

has gone to google images and searched for "inspirational quotes tumblr" "gold aesthetic tumblr" & "relatable crush post tumblr" then reposts it onto his socials or just taps thru them and giggles bc he relates

his cologne doesnt last as long as lucifers and probably smells common. he has to reapply a lot but it's a people pleasing smell. it's cheaper hence the constant reapplying

he probably does have an expensive bottle but is the type to totally overspray...eek

he is canonically a car guy 🥲 and probably tells the one in his room good morning & good night + kisses the hood every once in a while. has tons of car magazines

he doesnt really speak other languages but has attempted to learn spanish before

listens to whatever is on the radio. doesnt rly stan anyone but he eventually will listen to mc's playlist and mc's playlist ONLY

levi

lurks on mc's socials ALL THE TIMEEEE like he will rewatch ur stories and scroll thru ur feed and overanalyze ur tweets/rts or blog posts. if ur mc isnt the type to use sns much he still googles ur name all the damn time just to find any sites u might be on fjdjdjdjskks

probably streams on whatever youtube or twitch devildom site equivalent there is, but only has like 40 or so followers. which he is okay with!

until he sees someone else who gets more attention than him. then the envy starts kicking in bad. especially if they suck 🧍🏻‍♀️

classic gamer boy smell. you know, sweat, tears, must, and (sometimes) axe deodorant. lucifer has to do a scent check before he goes out to any event & lets him use his cologne. how sweet!

kpop stan!! more girl groups than anything and his ults are probably GIRLS GENERATION, wonder girls, twice, loona, & red velvet

cried when ioi disbanded and refused to leave his room. the only thing u could hear was downpour on loop at full blast

can also speak korean & communicate in echolocation like dolphins 😏

satan

listens to country music you cant change my mind

smells like whatever environment he is in. he doesnt really have a designated smell just throws some deodorant on and goes about his day.

he's sooooo bad at driving...gets road rage way too often so his license has been REVOKED

but hes totally a backseat driver. needs to be sedated on long trips

do not let him watch finding nemo when luke asks to watch it. it's not worth it. he will cause mass destruction.

if he was a human or lived long term in the human world he totally has the ability to be a doctor

is studying as many languages as possible, but he mostly knows latin & french & german etc etc. wants to learn all the dead languages out of curiousity

asmo

dont think this mf has ever held down a relationship. ever

he doesnt compromise much & is not willing to change his lifestyle to fit an s/o into it. you keep up with how he lives or it just isnt meant to be (but dont worry! he'll eventually learn...maybe,,,,)

has the hardest time out of everyone when it comes to breaking bad habits

his smell varies bc he uses a variety of perfumes (whatever is the most popular at the time) but he probably sticks to floral and fresh scents. he never uses generic people pleaser scents like mammon

listens to electropop, mainstream pop, & some alternative rock

as for languages he too knows french, spanish, italian, etc. in general, if it's a romance language he knows it!

opposite of lucifer in the sense where he loves sweets and will refrain from eating too many bitter things

i think we all know that asmo is the biggest rockstar of the group! he's probably been in a boy band at least once, but now he makes his own music

has tried to teach mammon how to sing once. ended up in a broken piano and bleeding ears...

beel

i feel like he is SO SHY

like unless ur close to him he will not start conversations or anything

i think he listens to r&b a lot ! and jazz 😎 maybe rock as well

smells like ur typical athlete with undertones of wet wipes. he carries them around bc he likes to clean his hands before he eats & is prepared for when theres no sink nearby

he can drive and he drives really well. no rough turns, parallel parks perfectly, and never has problems with merging

driving with beel is probably really soothing. left hand is steering the other is gripping ur thigh 😫

dont think hes really fluent in any other language but hes probably semi fluent in korean because levi wanted beel to help him out

definitely know how to order food in practically every language tho HAHAHA

belphie

he reminds me of randall from monsters inc

smells kinda musty IM SORRY but not the way levi does hes more like the kind of musty u feel or smell when it's a shitty morning

but that's only because hes so lazy, when he cleans up hes like satan

has definitely murdered multiple people before. mc is not the first 😐✋🏻

with that being said belphie has been put into prison at least twice when visiting the human world, the mf had such a strong hatred for humans theres no way he never got into trouble before

lucifer probably broke him out and they used the pen thingies from men in black to erase everyones memory of that 🙄

dont think he listens to anything other than music that'll put him to sleep. really likes lazy song by bruno mars but thinks that bruno mars put too much effort into the song. should have been one acapella verse and then finish

similar to beel hes only semi fluent in one language, probably french bc of lucifer. doesnt remember much but knows a couple of lullabies and bedtime stories

the sandman used to be his bff until they drifted. they do, however, like and comment on each other's sns posts.

diavolo

once he found out who nicki minaj was he became her #1 stan

def an ariana grande stan too 😌

choreographs dances when hes stressed...idk just seems like a diavolo thing to do

also makes rly bad soundcloud rap music sometimes. turns to poetry when hes feeling emo but only lucifer knows this. barbatos is suspicious of him but doesnt have enough evidence to confirm.

his dad is like hudson abadeer from adventure time aka marceline's dad? something must have influenced him to want to unite the 3 realms + he would need the approval to do so, so his dad must be more chill than all the others before him 🧍🏻‍♀️ IDK ok anyway

currently going through his hamilton phase bc of mc. whether mc's intent was to get him hooked onto it or just to explain it bc of something he saw online, he tells everyone that he found out abt it bc of mc!

this man cannot drive his skills are only second to jumin han

not too fond of many languages but knows the widely spoken ones like spanish, mandarin, etc. if it's taught in high school he knows it

smells like a las vegas casino. not sure why but i feel like he does. but there's also an interesting & nice smell to him if he embraces you. it's a smell you cant quite identify. but it smells nostalgic, it's mysterious, and it's tempting.

barbatos

very calm demeanor but underneath hes WILD hes probably done everything at least once oof

he just has a lot of control and stability over himself (must be nice!)

on a more angsty note i feel like he might have had his heartbroken sO BAD IDK he is hurting and maybe that's why hes so willing to obey diavolo and not abuse his time lord power thingies bc he learned his lesson the hard way

mans is so smart he knows every language you could switch languages mid conversation with him and he wouldnt be thrown off. he'd probably start speaking it too.

BUT HE SPEAKS VIET P E R F E C T L Y

listens to the same stuff as lucifer but also likes eminem. likes the movie 8 mile but criticized it heavily

have you ever been to a chinese herb shop? naturally, he smells like that. his room probably smells like it too. he doesnt really have a significant smell like some of the others

when he bakes he smells like whatever hes baking tho

one of the few out of everyone listed to have been able to travel to literally everywhere

solomon

was probably on kitchen nightmares once, but only to get feedback from chef gordon ramsay. then he used his magic to prevent the episode from airing...

was in an orchestra, one of the best times of his life. played the violin. asmo watched him in the audience once, but didnt approach him until well after that performance.

he CANNOT sing. he can, however, rap.

doesnt listen to music. he listens to podcasts! but every now and then he turns on background music, but prefers it to be instrumental stuff

never wears sunglasses. also does not have a driver's license. cannot drive a regular car. could maybe fly an airplane.

due to his immortality he has learned almost every language to exist, but finds himself speaking mandarin the most. knows most dialects too

similar smell to barbatos but u can also smell some sunscreen on him too. like, generic beach day suncreen

he has a lot of pact marks, so he once had the idea to match foundation to his skin. it took him two weeks but he eventually perfected a combination. yes he will help u find ur perfect shade if u ask him to

simeon

another country music man. has also made a tiktok or two to that one song that goes "he cant even bait a hook." they are private tho

angel country music exists and simeon invented it

if he visits the human world and wears more causal clothing he probably tucks his shirt into his pants

wears a speedo at the beach i tell u, speedo at the beach

he can speak german...i can feel it

uses his pointer finger to type and holds the phone like 2 inches away from his face so sometimes his nose will push a key hence all his typos

has no signature smell. he simply smells like your favorite scent all the time. if multiple people are around him at once, everyone smells a different smell. it's pretty rad

"what does he smell like to himself?" u may be asking. hmm...a church? 💀

luke

his first pet was a goldfish and a few months before the exchange program happened, he was given a koi pond!

secretly likes hanging out with levi sometimes just to play with henry. makes him miss his pet fish back home

so his favorite movie is probably finding nemo and he threw a fit when nemo touched the butt

luke is probably learning german bc of simeon, though he'd like to learn more of the dead languages just for fun

i dont think he listens to music often or has any preferences, he just listens to whatever is playing on the radio

but he finds himself listening to the music mc listens to

smells like freshly baked goods all the time. or fresh laundry. but like, not combined. just depends on the day

[varusai]

who do you think is the most dateable dark matter thief?? i know you have an opinion and i need to hear it

sorry for the late response anon i honestly had to think abt this one for a few days lmao, but yeah i have opinions. below the cut bc fr i have opinions, all of them have major pros and cons (based on my characterization at least) and really i just have to break it down for u

Boros, everyones obvious first choice, but certainly not mine.

Pros: rich, tall, pretty, fun af, passionate, will kill for you np, give you anything you want, literally anything.

cons: has a god complex, doesnt respect you, not his number one priority at all, will forget about you once its not interesting for him anymore, probably argumentative/combative af, is very very smart and has no problem manipulating you in all the worst ways, is very entitled so he will never feel bad about anything, cant win arguments either bc he’ll want to settle it with combat, will get offended over little things just to argue bc he thinks thats fun

this is a relationship you’d get into if you literally have nothing to lose and dont care about your mental health. like hes hot but this shit would be toxic af and he will ruin your life and leave you to go fuck around and fight someone on the other side of the universe. this will be the best of times and the worst of times for you and you will never be the same afterward mentally or emotionally. the only way i would even consider it is if i lost my damn mind. The only way a relationship with him would ever work long term is if you were physically stronger than him and were capable of putting him in his place OR you were smart enough, suicidal enough, and interesting enough to him to engage in some psychological warfare and reject him if he asked you. Make him chase you for years, say yes, then decide that /he’s/ boring /you/ and leave him for another member of the squad to just destroy their established hierarchy and humble him to the point that he’s obsessed with you.

i dont have the energy for all that, so i’ll just smash and pass.

0/10 completely undateable

Geryuganshoop, also a probable second choice for many:

pros: cute, nice, tentacle alien (obviously), will respect you np, will also give you anything you want, not antagonistic at all, telepathic communication so no risk of miscommunication, emotionally intelligent and available, loyal to a fault,

cons: horrible boss/best friend that you will have to listen to him vent about for at least 3 hours a day, complete yes man as well so he will not tell boros no or cut him off and you will be stuck dealing with this no matter what, severely mentally ill and wont go to therapy bc he thinks hes handling it well, workaholic, needs a lot, and i mean A LOT of attention

this relationship would be great if not for boros lol. boros sabotages his social and romantic life but geryu has been friends with him too long to either cut him off or establish boundaries. he has no backbone (figuratively and literally) and wouldnt even consider it. he’ll ignore you in favor of his job too, to a massive degree. also i think that while the telepathic communication would be a major plus in most cases, here i feel like i’d have no less than 16 different, never before seen on earth, mental illnesses projected right into my brain just from being within a certain radius of him.

im already fucked up enough in that sense so pass unfortunately.

it would be a yes without boros in the picture tho lmao

so prob like 4/10 iffy datablillity, 1 level increase with each decade of therapy he gets tho so a lot of potential :D

Groribas, my fav girl:

pros: straightforward, realistic, very clear expectations, will not fuck around with you whatsoever like there is no mind games or anything here, will kill for you, rich and non materialistic so she’ll basically just let you do whatever with her money since she doesn t care about it, cares about her job but like...a normal amount. she absolutely has a good work/life balance, highly organized so she will not forget important dates, loyal af and will defend your honor under any circumstances, mean but in a funny way, a ton of fun to hang out with if you’re into that, no eyes so i dont have to worry abt eye contact ever

cons: extremely high expectations, like exhaustingly high, and not even a bit of flexibility there, if you dont meet the cut its a no, she’ll let you know and leave same day, she will also bully you, you need a thick skin and great sense of humor to survive, bad at feelings if you need emotional support???? go elsewhere, shes mega emotionally unavailable, will probably want to share bodies as a form of intimacy

overall its a solid 6.5/10 dateability for me i love the directness and no bs approach, we would def get along well. however, while im not sensitive, shes def gonna hit on some insecurities at some point and it will cause an argument lol. but i mean whatever. it happens. the body sharing would be an issue though, same reason i wouldnt be chill with having a symbiote despite being a major venom fucker. i need my space i cant deal with that. so thats a possible deal breaker if she couldnt get over that lol. and she wont, so we wouldnt work out. i wish it fuckin would tho😭😭😭 i would take whatever crumbs of attention she would be willing to give me

Melzalgald, my fav they/them bastard:

pros: amorphous and shapeshifting aka extremely attractive according to my taste in monsters, tall af but could chose to be a more reasonable survivable size lol, self contained and self-entertaining so they dont need a ton of attention to be happy, funny af, rich, will give you whatever you want and probably a bunch of shit you didnt know you wanted, very fun, built in friend group if you didnt already have friends, extremely emotionally intelligent and great people skills due to living in a collective, stupid af by choice, like some of em are very smart, but they dont claim that, will say fuck work and tell boros to eat shit to spend time with you, will kill for you as well, but only if you ask them to bc their first inclination is to just bother someone to death, very loyal, once they like you they like you really forever, it would take some pretty extreme circumstances to make them dislike you

cons: annoying af and its unavoidable, will talk over you, all of them at once will talk over you and do so loudly, no respect for personal space, they dont even know what that is, will probably accidentally manhandle you, they act stupid but arent so they can be manipulative, even if it isnt bad and they dont really mean to be, impulsive, forgetful of the needs of organic creatures so they will bother you at all hours of the day and night if you arent firm with boundaries, disgustingly extroverted and will bring randoms to your place without asking, or just...make new cluster members and you have to roll with it, will eat or absorb literally anything you have, will antagonize and bother you for fun, major jump scare risk since sometimes the forms are....fleshy

this ones hard for me like theyre hot af and i feel like they’d be super fun and good partners, but god....the noise. idk how long i could deal with that lol i dont like people in my house. it would drive me up the wall, but then again...i can simply kick them out when ive had enough. they arent projecting mental illness directly into my brain or requiring me to share a body sintelligento major plus. creepy thing/symbiote style hot monster without any of the invasiveness so tbh 8/10 dateability

some people date loud annoying extroverts who dont understand personal space that /arent/ rich, loyal, or emotionally intellegent so i’d be winning on a few different fronts lmao

[daddy-daichis]

Yesterday the very beautiful and talented @fuwari-s tagged me in this game and since that post is already really long i figured id make a new one lol  (Also thank you for tagging me, it made me so happy)

The Game: Tag your 2D lovers + the other trend I saw yesterday and wanted to do which is Would you actually date them IRL. So ill put that under the cut because it is a lot.

HQ: Atsumu, Daichi, Issei, Bokuto, Hinata, and Kyoutani

BNHA: Bakugou, Denki, and Hawks

JJK: Sukuna and Mei Mei

Others: Kagami from KNB, Levi and Jean from AOT, and Mikoto Suoh from K

So if you want to know if i would date them irl that is below the cut lol

As for tagging... if you want to do it :) @eijirosriot @bokutosnumberonefan @hinosreis @tetsus-kitten @sugawarakoushihoe @mynameisjackattack and anyone else who wants to do one or both of these challenges.

Alright so would i date these men (+ mei mei) in real life. Short answer is yes lmao. Long answer, with some headcanons that may or may not  venture into 18+ category but only slightly. all aged up to be my age which is 26.

Atsumu - PLEASE, YES

we would be so chaotic together but he would also be really loving. As long as he can still prioritize me in a relationship, not over volleyball, just as much, then we will be golden. We would have such a good time and i feel like we would have a lot of fun bickering, which i really enjoy. Play fighting as a form of foreplay, if you will lmao. We’d probs be friends in HS and then get together after he starts playing for MSBY and he is secured in his position (and himself tbh). I just love this cocky bastard. he also gives me switch vibes and as a switch, i love that for me.

Daichi - YES

All i need is to be wrapped in his arms on the daily and i would be happy. Man would know how to take care of me and that is all. Love of my life, too good for this world. Wholesome husband. He would be able to manage my crazy side and chill me out when i get to anxious. I would want to be bratty just to get him to drop his good guy routine sometimes and I feel like he would like that.

Issei - YES

Funeral home employee can get it. Matsukawa Horse cock Issei can whisk me off my feet and straight into bed. we would have a lot of fun picking on oikawa together (out of love of course) but we would balance each other out a lot. His darker humor would go well against my lighter humor. Also I feel like our level of hotness is pretty comparable... like we aren't the prettiest in the friend group but still good (if that makes sense)

Bokuto - YES

Big ball of sunshine to light up my day, he would literally fuck the sad out of me every day I just know it. Like atsumu, as long as I am a priority to him itll work out. We also kind of have the same sad moods so I feel like we could either both just curl up on the couch together and watch a movie or bring the other out of a funk easily. I love this giant himbo so much.

Hinata - most likely yes

Pretty much the same reasons as bokuto but I feel like I would get drained of his energy faster, so he would def have to cuddle me more. For everyone else so far I can imagine being high school sweethearts, but with hinata i think he wouldnt settle down until later, or even start dating so it would probably be a lot of pining and watching him from the side lines for a while, which would be really hard tbh. but the way he would smile at me after a match would make it worth it so...

 Kyoutani - Hard YES

I love a boy with anger issues, what can i say... (cough couch my irl husband with anger issues couch couch) I would love to be his weak spot and the one person he would go to to help him not feel angry anymore. I think that my fun personality would help him to unbox himself a bit. I just want to give him cuddles and a place to feel accepted. id also i KNOW hes a monster in bed... 

Bakugou - FUCKING HARD YES, PLEASE

if he was real the things i would do to and for him... A lot like kyoutani i would want to give him a place where hes accepted, and a place where he is unconditionally loved. I would be able to handle his misguided anger and calm him down and give him space. I headcanon that hes very cuddly in private to just his S/O which is something that i love. I love his lil smirk and would do anything to get him to smirk at me. As long as he is able to set me as a priority it would work out, but that would be what he struggles with so it would be a thing we would have to talk about. But I also feel that once you say something about it he would check in with you because of course he has to be the best bf/husband. I feel like I could talk for hours about him so Ill just wrap it up by saying that I love me a passionate man who would probs be a lil possessive, and I would use that to my advantage. 

Denki - GOD YES

I really do think that denki and I are soulmates. we are both the perfect blend of funny, pervy, while still being soft. I feel like there would be a lot of mutual pining at first but he would end up the golden retriever gamer boy to my alt bisexual and thats just the perfect pairing. We would pull so much shit and then get away with it because thats just us being us. I see us being scolded by bakugou a lot for the stupid shit we would pull. Also late night drives in his shitty tuned car to taco bell while we sing alt rock songs from the 2010s. also the switch vibes are immaculate.

 Hawks - Probably

So it would honestly depend a lot on what version of hawks.. him in the hero commission is a no, because he wouldnt be able to be honest with me about a lot of stuff. Like his name, or when i can see him again, and that would give me too much anxiety. When hes free of them and is actually allowed to be himself I think it could work then. I know that he of course wants to still be the best hero, so he would have the same problems as bakugou with finding a balance, but if he wants to i think he could. He would also have a lot of trauma from his relationship with his parents and the commission so I dont know if he would be able to give his love away as freely as he wants so we could get therapy together. I love that for us. But i would happily wake up next to this beautiful birb man if he would have me.  

Sukuna - A hesitant yes

so.. the anger issues that ive mentioned before.. yes. I would like sukuna. I would be his lil bride and sit on his lap on his throne as long as he didnt kill my loved ones or my cats lmao. I would also be ok with being his and itadoris gf while hes living in itadoris head. being with him is just asking for an unhappy ending tho, whether its a life always on the run, or someones trying to kill me, or someones trying to kill him, or hes trying to kill someone. But yes i would like to be with him but that would mean sacrificing a lot. 

Mei Mei - god yessssss..

Please Mei Mei step on me and make me ur lil house wife. I see us living in a pent house apartment with the most breathtaking view of the Tokyo skyline. I would want for nothing and she could take me where ever she wanted and i would just follow her around with heart eyes.

 Kagami - YES

my basketball husband! i love him and would love to be loved by him. Id follow him wherever. He would take care of me and is just so dreamy.. also i guess the mild anger issues.. but hes really not that bad. He would just be such a good s/o. He would cook us nice dinners, wed have a few cats, and he would carry me around a lot because hes so strong. While were on the topic of strong... his stamina... everyone on this list probably has good if not great stamina... but kagami just hits different..... have you seen him in the zone? have you seen his thighs? his sex zone has got to be incredible. 

 Levi - Yes

I was going to say it depends, but really it doesn't... if were in the aot universe and hes my captain and I fall in love with him u can bet ur ass im gonna try and get with him because i could die at anytime. if its some au where he is here in our universe and somehow we meet... like of course im gonna be in love with him. our height difference isnt too bad, im only like an inch or 2 taller than him. I think we would both have a great time together. I would make him laugh, and he would help me clean, because lord knows I hate cleaning. BUT i hate cleaning because its something that I always have to do alone, and I feel like levi would have us be cleaning together like he makes the scouts do. and hes just so sexy... 

Jean - big yes

This beautiful handsome man... idk what to even say about him. Hes strong, funny, handsome, cocky, but very much full of love. would love to run away from the world with him. I feel like if he was in love with me before *tries not to give away spoilers* the marco incident (?) that after he would become very clingy and attached and im ok with that. There would have to be lots of cuddles and reassurances and i just want to see him happy and not at war, with both real life people and himself... id give him the best kisses and he would become addicted to them. 

Mikoto - No? But maybe...

I feel like we could be.. but if you watched the show then you know.. But i would love to be Homra’s princess TBH. No one would mess with me or they would have to face the wrath of my big fire boyfriend and his whole ass gang. But on the other hand I feel like Mikoto wouldnt allow himself to fall in love, so it would probably be a hush hush topic. everyone knows the boss and I are in an entanglement, but they cant talk about it. Then Anna starts asking questions to Mikoto and he has to come clean to her, which would be so cute. He tells her is a secret but she doesn't care lmao. in conclusion, I would want to, but I dont think he would let me.... Maybe friends with benefits tho....

............................................................................................

ok if you read all this im officially in love with you. Please take my heart. 

This took me like 2 hours to do because I love thinking about it so much. if you have any thoughts about any of this hop into my dms or comment on this because id love to hear them (especially if you think i belong with one more than the others lmao). 

[moonchildstyles]

In a quarantined world how are ur babies doing? I imagine vampire H and his Y/n hidden away in Italy drinking lots of wine, while Aster missed his baby so much he made her quarantine with him after a week without seeing her. And maybe he’s a bit stressed because he had to close the shop for a while but at least she’s home with him. But doesn’t let her do any of the grocery shopping at all. Oh and they probably miss their Chinese food lol

ive been thinking about what each of them would be like in quarantine ever since I went on lockdown back in like march so im SOOOOOO HAPPY SOMEONE ASKED !!!!!! I have...so many thoughts 

ill put them under the cut bc....I couldn't stop typing ushufhs 

so for aster,,,,,,, I think h would have had to close down the shop before the stay at home order even hit so he would already be in quarantine mode by the time she was transferred into online classes. I think maybe they would have spent those few weeks right before the stay at home order apart, her at her aprt and h at his house bc they really didn’t think it was going to be anything too intense until ofc harry started to realize what was going on and how the shop was going to be closed for longer than he thought I think he would have brought up quarantining together at his house bc he couldn’t imagine not seeing her for so long since he had missed her so much anyway just those couple of weeks. he would have helped her move some of her things in with him and all of her things for the last couple weeks of class and everything she needed to stay w him!! but he would def be stressed and worried about the shop and her safety but her being there with him would have made it a little easier for him bc no matter what at least they were together and he knew she was going to be okay and he would try his best to make her feel better bc she would def be nervous and anxious with everything going on and he would have to extra take care of her then but he wouldn't mind at all!! he def wouldn’t let her do any grocery shopping he would let her help him make the list of what they needed but she wouldnt be allowed to go since he wouldnt want her to be exposed at all even if it was by accident and he would make sure he was safe just so he could go home and cuddle with her w/o worrying!!  they would get to test out living together too and being around one another and sooooooo much time spent in the kitchen cooking together and they would pick up little hobbies together and h would try his best to teach her to draw like him and she would try her best to teach him how to cook and everything it would be very domestic !!! oh they def would miss the Chinese food but she would be able to convince him to order some delivery a couple of times and he wouldn’t be able to say no🥺

for citrine I feel like they would quarantine at her apart ! he would def bring dandelion with him and y/n’s roommate would quarantine with her boyfriend giving them a little more space and stuff!! it would be hard for h at first not being at home for so long and not being with all of his plants and nature but they would def take trips up there and check on things and for harry to tend to his garden at least once a week but they would spend majority of their time at her apart and since she wouldn’t be working for a few weeks they would be spending like all of their time together with harry teaching her about all of his witchy stuff and he’d teach her how to cook all of the things he learned to make over his time in the forest and just lots and lots of softness and cuddling and kissing and harry would literally be so happy !!!!!🥺

and for vampire I think they would have had a bit of a crisis ghshush bc he literally cannot fathom the idea of her getting sick and passing away like he just got over the idea of her having a cold so he can’t even imagine what it would be like have her get seriously sick and what his existence would turn into if something bad happened so when he first heard they would immediately go into quarantine and she would probs fight him on it a little just bc she would like to go to work and still like....be a little normal but he wouldn't be able to stomach the idea so they would eventually work out just staying at the manor for a while and her taking time off from work and he would spend all of his time making sure she was in the best health possible and things he could do to help her and how to prevent her from getting sick and all and then when it got more serious I think he would want to travel with her telling her that he wants her to be somewhere beautiful if they’re going to be there for so long and they would decide on his Italy home!!! he would be working on his cooking anyway bc he wants to provide for her so it would be A LOT of meals and lots of cooking and lots of taste testing for her and ofc lots of nice wine that he picked for her even though she felt like half of it was way too sour for her but he would always try even harder to find something she liked and omg allllll of the painting !!!!!! they would return to the manor with so many new canvases of her that he painted and all of these landscapes and then the little ones that she painted that were much more.....amateur ghishfs but he would love them and insist they keep some in Italy and hang up and others he would want to have at home and he would try to teacher all of the old techniques he knew and she would try but..she had more fun just painting however she wanted and he would have more fun watching her do that instead ! and I think they would talk alot like it would be a good time for harry to really start opening up about his past since he was so soft and open around her anyway and now they get to spend all their time together and so many bites and just !!! he would be so happy and even though it was a scary time for her he would make sure she never even realized what was happening outside of their home and make every minute as stress free and happy as he could !!🥺

[jackalopefreckles]

I feel like Ive aged at least 6 years since covid started. Im angrier. Less adapted to being outside then I used to be- which is saying a lot. This time last year I was?? Actually healthier mentally then I had ever been and looking forward to having the house alone for a month which?? Was the most freedom I wouldve ever had.

A lots fucking changed. I drove halfway across the country- all 30 hours at once with my big brother AND two elderly dogs, plus my cat. All animals on too many drugs (the vet said they couldnt overdose, and then failed to give any further instruction) cami peed on herself twice, unable to move. I had to waterboard her in Phoenix, a truly terrifying hell city where all the roads are raised and overlapping and its a hot as shit cause its?? What june?? Time was so fake this year I mustve just been stoned the whole time till I ran out of weed, and since moving its been a relief to be able to turn off the spinning anxious thoughts for a few hours

my big brother joined us. He brought a new dog with him which?? Is always a lot, plus I have this pack of dogs now cause the puppy wouldnt leave the super cancer ridden dog alone, and Im able to get her cbd regularly here, so shes always comfortable now instead of just?? Sometimes which is a lot nicer. We didnt think shed make it to chrisrmas. I thought shed die with me home alone to take care of everything, like always. It was almost a relief, I wouldn't have to coach my brother through the grieving process at least, and I had already finished. Its hard now even, for me to realize she might even have another christmas (but I wont hold my breath)

I feel safer going outside here then I did in Austin. I only went out a handful of times in texas, for the last few months I was ordering almost all groceries, and only going to the store once mask mandates were mandatory (theyre not anymore. Im so worried for texas. I missed a huge freeze by mere months. I dont think my elderly dogs wouldnt survived it. If I was alone with them, Im not sure I woudlve.

My parents took my brother to mexico with them. I begged them not to go, told them how irresponsible it was to travel across boarders. To visit an island and take all the plane germs with. I told them that even if my mom and brother were staying at home all day with me, my dad was still going to work and he didnt know what his coworkers were doing. That they wouldn't know what the people on the plane were doing. That at any point they could become the stupid americans that killed half an islands population.

They left a week after today last year. The boarders were closed the next day. Their friend has been traveling back and forth ever since. I have no idea how, except for the fact shes white and rich and wont hesitate to destroy a child, so I can only imagine how shed treat costomer service.

I will no longer allow this angry aggressive woman to ever make me feel bad, and I will allow myself to finally fight back. Im an adult, maybe not all the time (cause lets be real I'll always be a bit too eccentric for most) but when I get angry and allow myself that anger, it's not a bad thing. Anger doesn't have to make me feel like Ive done something wrong. Im usually very just in my actions, and I wont allow my parents influence to tell me all anger is misdirected and hurtful for reasons I couldnt understand. Its okay for me to be angry.

I think being alone with animals for months is at least reassuring that my childhood was unreasonable if nothing else. Which of course is a silly polite society term for pretty fucked, if nothing else.

My aunt had to gall to say weve had a good 2020 cause our family wasnt hurt, and I had to walk away from the zoom call. I haven't attempted communication with any of them since, not that I normally do. Of course none of us died, all rich old white people, most of them retired and able to stay home all day (not that all of them did, I learned about my grandfathers routine and just.. Im honestly surprised no one got it yet. Of course I knew from the beginning if anyone was gonna get it and die, it probably wouldve been me. Hence the 8 months of solitude before the move.

Was the move in August?? Im so unsure about time. Even with 2020 vision.

I tried to date when I moved here. Strictly on tinder. What was the point? On and off testosterone due to the wonders of texas, hadnt changed my body nearly as much as they should've a year after being on them. I look much more handsome now. Im also allowing myself to toss gender aside completely. He/him doesn't mean man, and they/them dont mean nonbinary, so why not mix them since Im?? Not really either.

It wasnt even a thought process like that to start. Much more "this is nice" which I think more gender should be allowed to be. Dont gotta be deep just comfortable.

I wont ever allow my parents to forget what they did. I ended up with three dogs I didnt want (I was so looking forward to not having any dogs) and I ended up taking care of my brother. Again. Its easier without my parents at least. Everything always is. My dogs are even happier. Cami finally isnt anxious 24/7. Again, a sad reminder my childhood wasn't great. Daisy is healthier. Trauma can be stored emotionally or with health issues, often both. I think the cancer dog getting better and?? Surviving and thriving so much longer then the vet said (how good was my old vet?) Is another unfortunate nail in thay proverbial coffin.

Im not as soft and openly loving. Im even more touch starved somehow. Harsher. I still want to choose love and compassion, but Im not letting myself fall into the trap of being so nice people wont be nice to you. Fighting back is something I wont feel shameful about, because it never stopped me from doing it completely anyway.

I was already reaching this on my own though. This was just more coffins, more nails. This didnt need to happen. We know our government let this happen. Its still letting it happen. Im not sure when Im getting my vaccine. My big brothers sick of quarentine and keeps trying to get us to go out. Sometimes I yield, and we go to a park, or the top floor of the parking garage. I get a vegan hotdog from nearby. We talk and laugh and were genuinely just. Boys being boys.

I shouldn't have to deal with parent shit anymore. I do though, especially since two out of three are unemployed and we can really only afford to live here cause of them (they owe me if anything though. Especially with my brother and these animals) I hope I can get a job soon. Or maybe even go back to school. Im lucky I had so much saved up (for top surgery, which I guess wont happen before Im 25 like I really tried for. I wouldve done it before now, but texas waitlists and rules kept holding me up. I literally went to an appointment in dallas, a 4 hour drive, just to found out the surgeon canceled on me for the second time)

Its incredibly depressing, and I know Im lucky to have had that stash. So many people didnt have anything and lost so much. People lost people. Half a million at this point. I remember when it got to 300,000 and I just?? Felt so awful it was so close to how many people we lost to AIDS. Its over that by so many now. It doesn't really stop, does it??

Is that catholic guilt?? Or maybe just irish guilt in general. Is it something I inherited or earned through all the end of the worlds and once in a lifetime recessions Ive been through. Im not sure how many off the top of my head, theyve been coming since I was so small and its always more and more. Im not even catholic anymore. I cant stop being irish though, even though the brits tried (and succeeded. Weve lost a lot. The current royal cotastrophy is bullshit as well, the only person who deserves a royal title is from Meniappolos

My home is decorate all inside for st patrick's day. My big brother loves it so Im going all out, and its def making me feel much more irish then usual (which is a lot Im over half)

I think I just wanted to say Im not the same. I hope I can still be happy an obnoxious is public. I wonder if I remember how

[desolationlovers]

oh yall thought i was done x posting? lol. kamui character rant under the cut

the thing about kamui is i dont know that hes a very deep character??atleast not how clamp has written him and esp not in the manga.

he spends a lot of the manga being confused and often manipulated. and hes really just a kid.

his first big character arc is debastardization basically. when hes introduced hes a TOTAL asshole (the anime added scenes to make him more of a dick at the start but also has a bit of an explaination? ill get to it). hes shown as very rude to everyone around him, yelling at people to get out of his way or get lost, including his previous friends. hes also shown to have absolutely no care for his surrondings and regularly fights and uses his powers in places where bystanders could be injured and leaving roads bridges or nearby buildings in ruins. when confronted about the latter by hinotos knight (his name is saiki) he straight up says he doesnt care if anyone gets hurt. which i mean ok nothing wrong with a character being an asshole. the extreme in your face way kotori and fuuma describe kamui as a kid being very shy and Very quiet and gentle makes this characterization confusing but hey people can change i guess. the confusing part is that as kamui slowly beings to let his guard down he says that the big reason he was so standoffish especially wrt kotori and fuuma was because he wanted to keep them at a distance so they wouldnt get involved with all the end of the world stuff. which makes sense obviously! kamui was absolutely aware of how dangerous it might get. his entire plan was to get the shinken (the sacred sword) and bail because he didnt want any part of any of it. what i dont get is why he was totally cool with bystanders being injured or killed. during his fight with saiki they were in a neighborhood! on people roofs and shit!! saiki is the one to lead them to an abandoned construction site so no one gets caught in the crossfire. and kamui almost kills saiki!!! which i will let slide a bit because kamui was being followed and had been attacked by spells literally that morning. but later on he apologizes to saiki but never explained his reasoning why he didnt care about destroying peoples houses??? and its never brought up again?????? also theres a scene added to the anime where he kicks the shit out of kotori and fuumas dad??? because he wouldnt give kamui the sword?? bro thats ur best friends dad you jackass!!!!!

in the anime they added flashbacks for the time after he moved away from tokyo which i think make his whole character make much more sense. when he first moves and goes to a new school he accidentally uses his powers and makes everyone afraid of him. fast forward past elementary school to high? school? its unclear. at school hes a lazy slacker that never goes to class and never talks to anyone, big ol loner. he sees that a local gang has been stealing kids money and beating them up. so he decides to put on a tough guy persona and confront the gang telling them to knock it off and scaring them shitless with some fun ass kicking psychokenesis. now i am SO on board with this addition. kamui being ostrisized for being weird and scary when hes already a super shy kid, so he embraces this scary intimidating image and tries using it for good because hes still ultimately kind hearted. he gets too absorbed in this tough guy persona that he loses touch with the original purpose of it and just uses it as a shield because he himself is afraid and confused. and maybe even hiding behind it because hes so afraid of having this huge destiny that he doesnt know if he can live up to and how can someone who decides the fate of the world be just some quiet oversensitive guy.

except all of that is my own speculation and analysis because they really do not go into ANY detail about this. i wouldnt say its to the point where it feels like they just flipped a switch and hes nice now but it def feels like that. and it annoys me because after he kind of apologizes for being a dick it doesnt really get brought up again?? i think he broods over it once or twice. but i would have really liked to see flashes of it coming back in high stress situations or something? he has a lot of points of grief and depression but its always meloncholic rather than angry and it really makes him feel like two different characters i wish it was way more of a mix.

anger would also be good with the whole overarching theme of trying to break out of the path destined for you. its constantly said that theres only one future by the dreamgazers although hinoto wants to change it. its supposed destined that kamui will lose and earth will be destroyed. anger but more importantly PASSION is whats needed break out of what has been preordained and to carve your own path. passion is also whats needed for the main part of the second half of kamuis character arc, figuring out what it is he REALLY wants. what his true wish is.

i also think anger could have been a good inverse to the deliberate mirroring of kamuis character and subarus character. subaru really represents despair and being completely swallowed by grief. his story is that the man he fell in love with (named seishiro) was just manipulating him for fun and is actually an emotionless assassian. subaru is so destroyed by this realization he goes into a depression and because of this is unable to save his sister being killed by seishiro. his goal is literally to be enough of a nusance to seishiro that hell kill him. literally he wants to be acknowledged as important enough to bother killing. its pointed out often how subaru and kamui are so similar, with how fuuma killed kotori, and how theyre both kindhearted ro a fault. its an intentional reflection. subaru even pulls kamui out of a similar depressive state after kotori dies. he and kamui have a whole heart to heart about how some peoples happiness can look pitiful to others and how hes going to fufill his goals even when other people are worried for him. and most importantly about how not everyone can be happy with an outcome. i think it would have been really good for subaru to represent someone overcome with depression about how awful the world is and paralyzed with that sadness and kamui would be the rightous anger and compassion needed to actually change the world. “lets this radicalize you rather than lead you to despair” you know? it would have been a really good parallel considering part of x’s themes are literally about having compassion for humanity. but that reading possibly shoots itself in the foot because the language used wrt the two possible futures are things to stay as they are or for a “revolution” to occur, meaning killing everyone to let the earth heal. so ideas of change are insinuated to be connected with the seven angels and genocide. which uh. not going to get into that.

i do like when he starts going to the clamp school he goes back to being shy and quiet and kind of gets pushed around by people with more force of personality. very fun uncomfortably relatable. its ok man im extremely passive too.

anyway final thoughts kamui needs more passion. clamp give me the rights. also let subaru and kamui hang out and have a brotherly bond. no creepy shit. just subaru being an akward older brother that knows what kamuis going thru and gives bad advice bc he has god awful coping mechanisms.

side note we arent ever told about his likes/dislikes hobby or anything of that nature. the blankest of slates. so my city now. i think hes into obscure indie music and has thousands of hours in various life sim games like animal crossing and stardew valley.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

its just wild idk how to say the experience of just like...it being a wholeass fixture in your life that you’re gonna off urself...i guess in earlier times (almost been aware of being suicidal for a whole decade babes) it was also that i just...like assumed that my future was gonna involve some whole disaster that was going to wreck the whole damn thing idk. like i always knew i didnt have the kinda situation where i had somebody to fall back on no matter what & i did very much know that i had the kinda situation where if it looked like the identity ppl thought i had fell through and it turned out i wasnt thriving in all of this and actually just kinda miserable and on my own, instead of having ppl who would be There For Me No Matter What i had the ppl who would want nothing to do w me except for further beat me down..........so yeah i guess ive been feeling like my future was only Doom since like 12 def...maybe earlier if you look at it idk its like wondering when i was starting being depressed fulltime. probs like age 3 idk

anyhow the point is....hard to explain what its like having the constant sense that you don’t have a future thats good & in your control & something you want, or that even exists right. like sometimes i imagine thinking abt the future in the ways that other ppl might, in the way that you assume you’ve got a good while and that there’s things you’ll get to do that you like or you’ll pursue your ambitions or whatever and its weird i think about it for like 3.3 sec and its like tf.........its like when you get some kinda Aroma Memory where your brain remembers that smell from 18.6 yrs ago & you have a 0.62second window to try to think of where its from while you have some fleeting visual/emotive memory.......sometimes i’ll just have some kinda emotional echo from a less depressed life and its like ?????? havent had this feeling in this exact way for a minute. its weird its like lol this doesnt belong to me anymore..

anyways for another solid like.....6-7 yrs its been kind of “i’ll be surprised if i make it another yr alive” with various ups & downs in that level of surprise along the way.....more like a Down lately lmao its wild how impossible it seems to make it a few more days or weeks when youre having a worse day than usual, having an on avg Worse period that lasts for months & months and etc is just....wild baby. if you havent felt it for even a day its not something you can really imagine. if u know what its like to feel like ur gonna die for a longterm period then you know what it is..

like always, maybe this is my year baby!!! in terms of death. if im thinking abt maybe this is the year i suddenly Succeed on all fronts and i never again have to think about kms, then that’ll be a struck-by-lighting, same-shuffled-card-deck-order twice in a row, sheer chance out of nowhere. your life isnt steered towards goodness because you’re good enough or Only As Much As You Can Handle or anything and ive been too deep in it this whole time to have ever been set up to not get the rug pulled out from under me several times over and yknow once you fall down even once, unless you’re really solidly backed up, the odds arent in your favor about not getting continuously run over the rest of the time. wind isn’t really at ur back there.

like im so glad abt every person ive run into who ive had in my life for more than like 5 hrs and im lucky that i was at least born recently enough to have had the internet/texting mostly regularly from 14 y.o. onward.....if i didnt im sure i wouldve been......even so much more isolated than i was. l o l . . . . ive got to feel like some ppl care abt me which is nice and didnt happen too much before then. its also good i draw lmao coz besides for the most part thats how i talk the best & how i get in touch w most of the ppl who end up sticking around enough i talk to more than like a couple of times.....but tho of course ive never like, found arbitrary success in terms of either my own solo financial boon to transcend any and all problems or ever just like bonding w a bunch of ppl like ride or die for life baby. coz like.....why would i do either. if you werent born into financial stability, let alone wealth, and if you didnt just happen to pick up these deep unshakeable relationships along the way at times when it didnt really matter.....good luck picking those things up further along the way when stuffs even shittier. i may’ve been lucky w the internet/texting timing but i wasnt lucky w the financial crisis hit or really just being born after the 80s, economy wise......or lucky w being isolated socially since age 4 and always having to feel distanced from ppl coz i could sense the difference & stigma of being someone abused & miserable before i was even really that self aware of the extent of those things about me.........oh well. coz again w the internet and me happening to draw enough prior to age 14 that i was always considered “good” at it, and then finding that i like to draw fanart for myself lol....so i could at least connect w ppl some ways right. or via text posts sometimes lmao....and im lucky that the ‘net / having a phone gave me a medium for those things & being connected to some ppl. and im lucky im gay & not cis & got to figure that out & enjoy it coz thats the best thing abt me.......

anyways even if say life was perfect for me magically i still wouldnt be able to relate to seeing yourself pursue your ambitions coz like i always say...ive never really had those lmao. wasnt able to baby.....its like there’s always that idea that ppl whose life is defined by Survival, who’ve been exposed to trauma &/or abused, that if you drop them into a safe stable situation w/friends and all and whatever then suddenly they’ll be a “regular” person, like there’s some inherent core of everyone where they Know what its like to get to live in a healthy environment w a certain perspective on other ppl & how they’ll treat you, and if you just remove someone from bs they’ll just shift over to that Default that is like oh lol yeah im like everybody else. like nah its a whole different kind of world / life you’ve not even necessarily adapted to, maybe its what you grew in. and you can adapt to a better life & grow further in that but its not a matter of like “washing away” what came before....it can be an entirely separate thing. like if you haven’t experienced it you cant imagine it. i cant give someone a real sense of what its like to grow up within & live in an abusive place for decades. and i can’t guess who i would be if i’d grown up / lived in a completely different, better situation. coz thats a whole fundamental change from the start. it’d be such a different person that it wouldn’t even make sense to call it an alternate version of “me.”

well anyways i always feel like i’m bound to kms & that bad things are impending sooner than later & when they happen i’ll get a new set of incoming bad shit to feel bearing down & etc & i dont have things i want except a cessation of living under dread & feeling like my existence is in the way & theres ppl around i gotta be on my guard for & i’m only gonna kms eventually here, theres a long lifespan & for being to off yourself at any given time, also im jealous of ppl who’ve had a nicely sized friend group where they’ve always been able to hang out w one person at least whenever they wanted to / needed to. at least i’m gay, baby. i honestly do feel like that tweet where its like i cant kill myself b/c what if im a straight guy in my next life? @ god i cant do it. like lmao for real though......in my past life maybe i was an 80s gay. syke if i have a past life it was probably a cat. maybe a cat of an 80s gay. i can only hope

[leeoliver]

@launcelot tagged me for this and since it did helian i figured id do kiri!

GENERAL

NAME: Kiri Etiscalko

ALIAS(ES): the Exile? in a sense? shes gone by K(ay) before.

GENDER: shes girl.

AGE: 34

PLACE OF BIRTH: Galactic City, Coruscant

SPOKEN LANGUAGES: Basic+Binary

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bi

OCCUPATION: uhhhh jedi. she was a dancer for a while after getting exiled. regular ol dancer and also an exotic one.

APPEARANCE

EYE COLOR: dark brown

HAIR COLOR: dark brown

HEIGHT: 5′10″ shes so big shes so strong shes so energetic in her sweaty overalls

SCARS: def no facial ones and none atm that ive really fleshed out or defined. id be surprised if there werent some somewhere.

FAVORITE

COLOR: orange!!

HAIR COLOR: ohh all hair colors are so beautiful...she loves the color of miras hair

EYE COLOR: same as hair but Green especially..

ENTERTAINMENT: she loves to dance!! alone in her quarters, just playing music and dancing around. likes to sing too but shes super. bad. she’ll play pazak if someone else offers.

PASTIME: anything wrt droids, loves loves loves them. works out and trains a lot. meditates.

FOOD: most things breakfast! pancakes, or whatever the space equivalent is

DRINK: i bet shed like smoothhies. mmmmmmmmmmm. oh and shes CONSTANTLY drinking water. all the time.

BOOKS: she’ll read most things. murder mysteries shes a big fan of.

HAVE THEY

HAD SEX: not pre-kotor. she and atton might have like...at some point? maybe? shes. “prudish” isnt the right word its more like? schoolgirl giggly? she cant talk about sex without dissolving into laughter.

HAD SEX IN PUBLIC: HELL no. never

GOTTEN PREGNANT: no!

KISSED A MAN: pre-kotor doubt but maybe? post-kotor its that one “to do list: kiss 100 boys kiss 1 boy 100 times” meme

KISSED A WOMAN: yeah! there was this one girl while she was in exile who ran a droid repair shop and had the Biggest Lesbian Crush on her and she finally told her one day and kiri. just felt like she wasnt in a place where she could handle a relationship, necessarily so she turned her down and they kissed. once to sort of like? put it to rest? that was kiris first kiss.

GOTTEN TATTOOS: no

GOTTEN PIERCINGS: no

HAD A BROKEN HEART: i dont. think so. not in the romantic sense. what happened on malachor broke her heart immensely, id say.

BEEN IN LOVE: yeah

STAYED UP FOR MORE THAN 24 HOURS: id think so. especially when she was first getting used to exile and living on the outer rim. very paranoid very anxious couldnt sleep well.

ARE THEY

A CUDDLER: (surprisingly tbh) not really? she’ll cuddle if someone else wants to but wont really seek it out? that being said, shes so down for platonic cuddles.

A KISSER: kinda the same way! she doesnt mind kissing but shes just not super. physical in general.

A SMOKER: no

SCARED EASILY: no, i dont think so

JEALOUS EASILY: you know what i do feel like shes sort of the jealous type? but too nice to actually get pissy or anything about it

TRUSTWORTHY: ABSOLUTELY..

SINGLE: nooo

RANDOM QUESTIONS

WANTED TO KILL SOMEONE: hm. id say there were some real initial feelings of hatred and anger towards the council for a while and that had you grabbed, like, 24yr old kiri and said “do you want atris dead?” shed be like FUCK yeah. but would she herself want to actually. kill her? i dont think so. and all of those feelings eventually faded. like even before the start of the game.

ACTUALLY KILLED SOMEONE:  hh

RIDDEN A BEAST: probably. shes fun like that.

HAVE ANY FEARS: being completely isolated, alone, hated. thats what it felt like for a while.

FAMILY

SIBLING(S): two much much younger brothers, whose existences shes unfortunately not aware of. hahona is 11-12 or so and marama is 7-8. the boys actually use their moms last name (kiri did too, originally, but her mom decided it was better for political reasons if kiri use her dads last name when she went off as a baby to go become a jedi or whatever)

PARENTS: i mean, duh, but not that shes in contact with. her mom’s name is arista welvox and she’s from a really rich and important coruscanti family. she was like 45 or so to kiri’s dad’s 24 when they got married and had her. her dad’s name is tama etiscalko and he’s an architect. also DONT ask me how kiris mom could have kids so late...its SPACE bro

CHILDREN: no! doesnt really want to be a mom, actually

PETS: no...wouldnt mind a cat or something

tagging @cazador-fruit-pie @thefoodwiththedood @penguity and anyone else whod like to do it!

[lebilliam]

Hey sirmcartney asked me to do this

I’d rather be doing this over my school ish anyways :’)

Ask me some questions!

3 Fears: Ghosts :((( , fat insects , failing stuff 

3 things I love: i fukin love talking to my friends and hanging out , listening to music that i havent heard in forever, and that post workout glow 

2 turns on: i can send them memes :) , i can laugh and not give a heck with them

2 turns off: i cant send them memes :( , being mean to me (im sensitive af)

My best friend: zoo wee this is a hard one but id prob say logan or brian or adam or morgan or alex. take ur pick. (morgan and logan tbh)

Sexual orientation: str8 

How tall am I: 5′9″ according to my ID

What do I miss right now: intimacy

Favourite color: orange!!!!!

Do I have a crush: ;)

Favourite place: currently ive been digging the imagination room

What am I listening to right now: affection // Cigarettes After Sex

Shoe size: it varies on the brand but normally 9.5 or 10? idk im bad

Eye color: brown

Hair color: black 

Meaning behind my URL: its bc i wanted a recognizable alias that i could use across platforms 

Favourite song: i always say liztomania by phoenix

Favourite band: Maroon 5 fanboy here but ive been a fan of Cigarettes after Sex for a while now

How I feel right now: STRESSED and ANGERY

Someone I love: myself (kinda)

My current relationship status: 

My relationship with my parents: we dont really talk that much but good i think?

Favourite season: oof i like the heat but im gonna say winter bc i get to be emo and i can go walk on fresh snow 

Tattoos and piercing i have: none atm

Tattoos and piercing i want: hmmm idk if i want anything big but i always thought the track shoe/wing thing would be nice

The reasons I joined Tumblr: all my friends had it so i thought i would be cool if i made one

Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?: i have gotten some before and i appreciate them 

Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?: the last person i texted? surprisingly no

How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?: depends if i shower but i can get going in ~4-5 minutes

Have you shaved your legs in the past three days?: nope!

Where am I right now?: imagination room!

Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? hell yea who doesnt

Do I live with my Mom and Dad? not atm im chillin #dormlife

Am I excited for anything?: excited for the weekend

Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? hell to the yea of course

How often do I wear a fake smile?: everytime i feel weird around people idk usually i wouldnt say i smile that much unless im gooning 

If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?: I believe that the world will introduce me to people when i need it (lame answer: idk anyone but maybe like my friends’ friends)

What do I think about most? this week it’s been the french essay i had to write but overall i think about being appreciated 

Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? id be on both sides if i could but if i had to pick one id totally be in front

What was the last lie I told? oh haha i dont know (but i do know)

Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? PHONE CALLS

Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Hell yea what else am i supposed to be afraid of. aliens are super cool man of course i think theyre real

Do I believe in magic? NOPE! but theres been some crazy magic tricks where i almost believe but then i see the “how it’s done” video for it

Do I believe in luck? hell yea of course! why would it not exist? 

What’s the weather like right now? ughgh it’s disappointingly hot 

What was the last book I’ve read? Huis Clos by Jean Paul Sartre (i had to read it for class but it really is a great work of art)

Do I have any nicknames? B, Lil B(ones i have heard the most) Billiam, Broletariate Biu (my mom calls me that), (billy bear is an old one and i dont know why they ever used it in the first place), goomph, toad, frog, ugly ass, nerd, dork, dingus

Do I spend money or save it? i spend it haha kms i really need to save more efficiently

Can I touch my nose with a tounge?: nope just tried and looked like a fool

Favourite animal? oof i want to say dogs but thats basic but dogs are so loving like i dont get it how do they do it

What was I doing last night at 12 AM?: i was up and i was emo. jk i was hanging out and watching bad Freshman xxl cyphers

What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Get Low by lil Jon or Faded (the remix) or change your mind by the killers. im gonna go ahead and say that change your mind gets my shit hyped UP

What is my favorite word? satiation

My top 5 blogs on tumblr: idk if im going to be honest i dont really use tumblr that much for personal blogs but i do love foodporn, til, ruined childhood

If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? love each other. 

Do I have any relatives in jail? i dont think so? oh jk theyre not really a relative but they’re a close family friend’s relative

What is my current desktop picture? FUKIN FUNCTIONAL GROUPS THAT I DONT EVER KNOW OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD EVEN THOUGH THERES A TEST IN 10.25 HOURS

Had sex? ye

Bought condoms? ye

Gotten pregnant? cant really say that i have :p

Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? yes

Had job? yep! summer job at the zoo which was cool af

Smoked weed? once or twice 

Smoked cigarettes? never.nope.disgusting

Drank alcohol? yes

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? i tried being vegetarian for a bit but then i wasnt eating enough red meat

Been overweight? as a kid i feel like i was overly big but now that i think about it i dont think i was fat

Been underweight? definitely

Gotten my heart broken? homeboy who hasnt?

Been to prom? yeep

Been in airplane? yeep

Learned another language? heck yes! english kek and im in the process of learning french. i tried learning lithuanian after a life changing experience. 

Wore make up? surprisingly no

Dyed my hair? nope! i dont want to bleach my hair

Had a surgery? uhhh does laser surgery count? bc ive had 3 so far and i might have more

Met someone famous? every time i walk by a mirror ;) jk i met the senator of WA and the mayor of Tacoma a couple times

Stalked someone on a social network? pfft hell yes

Been fishing? yep! it’s always an experience

Been rejected by a crush? rip me yes

What do I want for birthday? i want to have a nice get together with friends where we do stuff that i dont have to pay for (but i dont think thats how life works anymore)

Do I like my handwriting? I love it in pen and when i hit my ecrivain stride, but otherwise when my hands get sweaty its just a fkin mess 

Where do I want to live when older? i’ve always said paris, but zaragoza spain wouldnt be too bad!

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? yea boi

What I’m really bad at: believing in myself 

What my greatest achievments are: i was a smart kid in elementary! i got some awards for getting good grades and i went to a competitive thing for piano once and i placed a couple times in some random races ive run

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me: oof i dont want to really relive that experience

What I’d do if I won in a lottery: id ask /r/personalfinance 

What do I like about myself: id like to think im gaining/losing healthy weight

My closest Tumblr friend: on tumblr?? idk i said i dont really use tumblr for friends but i’d probably say memequeen or sirmccartney

Any question you’d like? when am i going to meet up with my RA? no one knows idk i forgot about our meeting and hes really cool about rescheduling so i might do it this saturday

Are you outgoing or shy? it really depends on how im feeling but id like to think im pretty outgoing!

What kind of people are you attracted to? NICE FRIENDly people who can laugh. laughing is important to me

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? personally i think yes

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? nope!

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? @thoseloverseyes most def

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “haha and then what ;)” jk it says” thank”

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? boy oh boy am i not ready for this question. Id think “this love, maroon 5″, humble (its a bop), “the air that i breathe, “open - rhye”, and rollin by calvin harris or this house by japaense breakfast idk the last one always changes

Do you like it when people play with your hair? i had a weird experience once but idk i think im willing to let other people touch my hair? not a fan 

Do you think there is life on other planets?of course. this topic is not up for debate. just bc our defition of life has not been found that does not mean that there is not life in other places where we are either 1) not looking or 2) life that we cant recognize due to our weird weird obsession with water like life does not have to use water as a conduit for essential functions

well that was fun and id say it took some time. it def got me feeling better about life. 7.8/10 i would do it again but im sweaty af from this hot ass room

peace!

[omglr]

ama mgtow

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You both like feminism.

Stranger: Hi I am a MGTOW . Ask me anything . If you are seeing this message again , disconnect .

You: howdy

You: hmmm, how is going your own way treating you?

Stranger: treating you?

Stranger: whats that supposed to mean?

You: do you enjoy it?

Stranger: yeah

You: cool

You: good for you

Stranger: thanks but is that all? i thought a humans can be creative enough . ask me something else

You: what does going your own way look like?

You: did you have to move out of the city?

You: do you live on a commune?

You: is it a cool farm space with anarchist organizing structures?

Stranger: its pretty normal i guess

Stranger: no

Stranger: no

You: or is it a bleak capitalist wet dream like galt's hidden mountain pass in atlas shrugged?

Stranger: i have no idea

You: oh,

Stranger: i have no idea

You: are you recruiting other men?

Stranger: hmm thats interesting . well not really

Stranger: but i am thinking of doing so

Stranger: like all other mgtows

You: i see

You: why did you decide to go your own way?

Stranger: because it makes the most sense to me personally like many other men

You: does the world of women scare you?

Stranger: world of women? you think thats a different world?

Stranger: well yes

Stranger: because i have things to lose

Stranger: rn

Stranger: once i dont have any

Stranger: then i wouldnt be scared prob

You: what might you lose?

Stranger: well money in the form of childsupports and alimony / my freedom in a lose sense / my happines /my kids (maybe in future)

Stranger: or maybe money to just appease a whamen

Stranger: like buying her gifts and such

You: have you ever dated a woman?

Stranger: nope not really because i never acted even if they were interested

You: are you interested in sex?

Stranger: well thats a no brainer , an average man is def gonna be interested in sex . the only major difference is that i dont mind being a virgin/celibate all my life

You: some men are asexual

Stranger: nah i am anything but asexual

You: what do you do for money?

Stranger: i am studying rn

Stranger: to give you an idea i am 19 yo

You: oh

You: that's very young

Stranger: well i am not a child anymore

Stranger: atleast not mentally

You: what are you studying?

Stranger: as compared to most men my age

Stranger: electronics

Stranger: soon transitioning into ai/ml

Stranger: and minors are physics and mathematics

Stranger: but i have a good amount of knowledge in history / philosophy / psychology and economics

You: have you considered taking a gender studies class?

Stranger: nah not really

Stranger: i will do my independant analysis of the subject

You: it might be nice to have some structure/guidance from folks who don't want you to be a virgin forever?

Stranger: from folks ? like whamen? srsly i dont care if a remain a virgin all my life. whats so bad about that?

Stranger: see i dont want children

You: what are whamen?

Stranger: so tell me why i should get romantically involved with women?

Stranger: women

You: at this moment i don't think you should get involved with women,

You: i am worried you would have issues with uh... misogyny that would get you in trouble

Stranger: misogyny? lol because i said whamen? its a slang for women in the meme community and is meant as a light hearted joke

Stranger: even if i am a misogynist i would never act on it because as i said before i have much to lose

You: so, just thinking maybe you need to round out your education with some information provided by women about women?

Stranger: ever heard of the saying women dont know what they want themselves?

Stranger: never trust a women's words

Stranger: but only her actions

You: yeah, that's what i'm talking about

You: that's the misogyny

Stranger: well its not really because its a practical solution to get laid with women

Stranger: if someone wants too

Stranger: not me

You: cool, that's fine

You: women have lots to offer besides sex

Stranger: like?

You: uh..... anything?

Stranger: so you cant come up with a single thing that women can offer besides sex

You: i just think you can't see women as people?

You: and if you can't imagine things that people do that benifit people that's weird?

Stranger: what i am saying is that whatever a woman can provide to a man can be provided by his best friends except sex and children

Stranger: if i dont want sex and children

You: a woman could be your best friend

Stranger: well its unlikely

Stranger: in most cases one or the another starts to fall for each other

You: i mean, its a self fulfilling prophecy

You: that you won't have meaningful relationships with women

Stranger: well the thing is that women can be my best friends but for the most part men are the best friends of other men

Stranger: am i wrong?

Stranger: like many women were in fact when i was younger

Stranger: but those 'friends' were actually interested in me . in essence i was the one who friendzoned them

You: ...i don't know man, judging the world off of how teenagers treat eachother is a pretty stunted outlook

Stranger: yes i know its pretty grim

Stranger: but its our reality or maybe soon to be one

Stranger: so ask me anything else?

You: when you are done school will you go your own way?

Stranger: i am going my own way rn

Stranger: and ever after

You: what does going your own way mean?

You: cause i was imagining like a lesbian separatist commune, but full of dudes and boring

Stranger: by not marrying/cohabitating/or hooking up with women . but the most important is to spread the philosophy of mgtow among men

You: what about collaborating with women?

Stranger: nah i'll hard pass

Stranger: i can do so without them

Stranger: even if i cant i would make use of them and discard them after their utility

You: lol

Stranger: to further my goal

Stranger: either by hook or by crook i will acheive what i aim for

You: what area of enployment do you think you'll end up in?

Stranger: as in field of work?

You: yeah

Stranger: well i would prob be in politics or have my own tech startup

You: and you wouldn't hire women?

Stranger: well i wouldnt need to because i said before too , i am going into ai and electronics field

Stranger: i will make sure everything is automated

Stranger: in my company

Stranger: except maybe select few jobs

You: is your mom smart?

Stranger: prob yes

Stranger: in a conventional sense

You: are there any women you respect?

You: that if they offered you a job in 2 years when you are done school that you would happily work for?

Stranger: not really except prob my sister . even then AWALT holds true

Stranger: no

You: what's awalt?

Stranger: because i dont want a family and just have to look for myself

Stranger: and thats relatively easy

Stranger: so i dont mind living on the streets if everything else fails

Stranger: or maybe in jail

Stranger: or maybe become a monk

You: uh...

Stranger: and awalt means all(many) women are like that

You: do you have inherited wealth?

Stranger: no i am fairly middle class

Stranger: atleast my parents are

Stranger: but i sure as hell need immense money for my next step

You: but if a woman at a tech company offered you a job, you'ld rather be homeless?

Stranger: yeah prob i will . i would rather have my own tech company than work in any other be it a man or a woman

You: even if it provided you training and money that could be helpful in your next step?

Stranger: and since i will soon be emigrating to china i would not be forced to do affirmative actions for women and select people (that is if its necessary) and select thembased on pure merit

Stranger: hmm maybe then i think

You: where do you live now?

Stranger: uk

You: cool...

You: brighton?

Stranger: nope

You: ok

Stranger: so anything else ? it was an relatively enjoyable chat

You: so... you enjoyed getting attention from women on an intellectual basis?

Stranger: this was by no means an intellectual conversation

Stranger: but it was amicable and light hearted one

You: lol, you enjoyed having a woman pick your brain about your expertise/eccentricity

Stranger: nah not really , i have had intense intellectual debates before

You: mildly challenging you to question your teenage misogyny

Stranger: and trust me some of the ideas put forward were stunning

Stranger: this was pretty average intellectually it was more about me personally

You: lol, alright dude

You: i mean you prombted an AMA convo

You: and didn't ask me anything about myself

Stranger: yes i know but you could have asked me about general mgtow stuff

Stranger: or its philosophy

You: but its cool i'm not particularly stunned by your thoughts

Stranger: because i didnt even bother to present them

You: yeah, i'm not that interested in it, i'm more into whats up with you

Stranger: well alright lemme ask you few questions then

Stranger: down?

You: cool

Stranger: where you from?

Stranger: nvm

Stranger: just asl

You: canada, 34 female

Stranger: hmm alright

Stranger: married?

You: sort of

You: in a ltr

Stranger: interesting

Stranger: ever been in one

Stranger: ?

You: yes, i've been in multiple long term relationships

Stranger: nah only marriage

Stranger: i mean were you married before

You: i've been married too

Stranger: yes

Stranger: thats what i was asking

Stranger: from which age to which age?

You: 22-27

Stranger: hmm thats fairly young

You: yeah

Stranger: and how long has this relationship been going on for?

You: 20-27

Stranger: how long is this current relationship been going on for?

You: 6 years

Stranger: 28 - 34?

You: yeah

Stranger: but there is not much gap between when you got divorced

Stranger: and your current relationship

You: sure

Stranger: how come you have had many ltrs?

Stranger: how many?

You: 3

You: well 4 but that one doesnt count

Stranger: and how many sexual romantice partners uptil now? i mean did you go through the 'wild phase' when you were in college

Stranger: ?

You: i'm not sure the point of this questioning

Stranger: well its very much relevant to the mgtow ideology

Stranger: if you dont wanna answer thats alright i would assume it to be in double digits

You: yeah

Stranger: yeah i figured

You: lol

Stranger: so you got married at 20 you say?

You: 22

Stranger: and can you describe your ex husband?

Stranger: as in was he average

Stranger: ?

Stranger: in looks

Stranger: dick size etc

Stranger: was wealthy

Stranger: or not and so on

You: she was a woman

Stranger: ohh thats even more interesting

Stranger: bisexual?

You: we met in college, and got married, but had had different ideas for what we wanted out of life

You: yeah, she's bi, i'm mostly a lesbian

Stranger: but how come you have partners in double digits? were it all males ? is your current partner a male too?

You: no, i'm dating a woman, we are poly

You: i had sex as a teenager too

Stranger: open relationship thing?

You: yeah

Stranger: so you hook up with men too?

You: my marriage was open too

Stranger: or only women?

You: a mix

Stranger: yeah i figured lol

Stranger: but even then

Stranger: atleast you are a lesbian

Stranger: so its better

Stranger: well that was pretty interesting no doubt lol

Stranger: do you want kids?

Stranger: are you religious?

You: i don't think i want kids

Stranger: fair enough

You: i was raised secular, but my gf is jewish and its very cool

Stranger: so you are jewish then?

You: so i might be religious

Stranger: ohh alright

Stranger: any particular hobbies?

You: idk, i haven't converted

Stranger: nah its all cool

You: drawing, writing, bikes, camping, videogames, tv, making things

Stranger: hmm so not much academically inclined

Stranger: you majored in which subject?

You: visual arts

Stranger: whats that?

You: i went to art school

Stranger: hmm alright that does make sense

You: i did Cyber-arts in undergrad

Stranger: hmm i dont have any idea but alright cool i guess

You: and interdisciplinary studies for my masters

You: yeah, its was like "tech-art"

Stranger: well i did get an idea when you elaborated a bit

Stranger: so whats your future plan?

Stranger: plan on gettinh married?

Stranger: *getting

Stranger: with her

You: make art, fight the government, live with my gf out of wedlock

Stranger: well thats a coincidence , we have atleast something in common

You: yep

Stranger: but alright i have already made up my mind about you

You: ok

Stranger: and i think you are better than most women because you atleast stay away from men

You: ha ha

Stranger: thats all i have to say

Stranger: anyways anything else?

You: its true, men don't have a lot to offer

You: me^

Stranger: well yes i agree , men are practically redundant for women and family

Stranger: but they provided something of value historically thats for sure

Stranger: but anyways thats for another day prob

Stranger: wanna ask me something else?

Stranger: any questions left?

You: yeah, well, i mean if you see a gender studies class open up, i thin you should consider taking it

You: you seem to like "intelectual convos" you can find them there

Stranger: nah lol an american mgtow did take an introductory class to gender studies

Stranger: *classes

Stranger: and did a 100 page analysis of the subject

Stranger: not to mention the fact that i defeated most of the gender studies/sociology majors in debate

Stranger: here on omegle

Stranger: and elsewhere on the internet

You: well again, i'm more interested in your reaction to the source materials and how that might help you

Stranger: why do you think i need help?

You: idk i don't want to insult you

Stranger: lol you think i really care? there is no shaming tactic anywhere that would work on us mgtows

Stranger: i am immune to it all

You: its just think a teenage guy invested hard in the manosphere is a sad way to start manhood

You: and not very healthy

Stranger: lol

You: but you'll figure it out

Stranger: it is healthy for some men atleast

Stranger: and i am one of them

You: mmmmm,maybe you are?

Stranger: and this is the best way to start manhood

You: ok, you do you

Stranger: ofcourse everyone should be able to do so

Stranger: but yeah thats that

You: cool

You: take care of yourself

Stranger: k

Stranger: and if you see me again

Stranger: just skip

You: lol

You: ok

Stranger: yeah i am serious

Stranger: i dont want to keep talking to same select group of people

You: maybe i'll pretend to be someone else

Stranger: hmm

Stranger: ok

Stranger: anyways i gotta go talk to someone else because i have limited time left

Stranger: thanks for an amicable ama

You: if you really want to get out of your bubble

You: try one of those classes

You: take care

You have disconnected.

[comicteaparty]

December 17th-December 23rd, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from December 17th, 2018 to December 23rd, 2018.  The chat focused on Lovespells by Ryan & Sage.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Lovespells by Ryan & Sage~! (http://lovespellscomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PST), so keep checking back for more! You have until December 23rd to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 3. Do you believe that Esther will eventually confess her feelings to Maria? What do you think it will take for that to happen given Ether’s shyness about it?

QUESTION 4. Given some further hints, do you believe Maria’s own feelings towards Esther are changing? How do you think Maria would react to a confession from Esther? Would a confession ruin their friendship?

snuffysam

only at the end of chapter 4, but loving it so far! here's my current answers... 1. definitely the scene at the end of chapter 4 where Maria asks Esther for more lessons/to hang out as friends. We already know what Maria's there for ahead of time, and I eat dramatic irony like that for breakfast. Also, the reactions of Maria's friends who see Esther's obvious crush. 2. Hmmmm Maria. She's this super cheesy knight type, and that's me babey.

3. Yes, and it will be an accident.

4. Just from what I've seen so far, Maria's feelings towards Esther have changed. The relationship started out super professional from Maria's point of view (Esther is just helping her level up her magic. strictly teacher/student) but now she sees Esther as a friend. At this point... I don't think Maria would find a new tutor after the confession like Esther thinks, she's too professional for that. But it may put a dent in their friendship if the feelings aren't reciprocated.

decademic

omg, blitzed through it again because I love these slow burn lesbians and their wonderful relationship~ honestly couldn't ask for more! the art's amazing, the story is paced so well, the panels honestly are on par with paranatural levels of forethought and care, just ooo! I love them!!! onto the questions... 1: oh gosh, I can barely choose! the first meeting, when Maria shows up at Esther's house with her friends and they see how oblivious Maria is, the critical hit scene...throw a dart, I love it. 2: I'm gonna have to say Esther, she's so relatable by nature, and her actions are so pure intentioned. the love potion instead of elixer moment was such a cute nod, I got heart eyes and pledged my soul immediately. 3: I want Esther to start to confess, but Maria stops her and confesses instead! cue teary eyes and a first real kiss~ 4: Maria needs to identify this feeling as love; real love, before anything in the relationship can move forward at all. therefore, there has to be some realization on Maria's side sooner than later to make it work. Esther would probably chicken out halfway through the confession and confuse them both, which is why I'm gunning for Maria to do it~

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What do you think happened to Esther in the past that caused a healing spell to give her a permanent mana siphon? Do you believe Esther will reveal whatever happened to Maria? What might be the consequences of Esther telling her or keeping it secret?

decademic

gosh, good question...

so I guess 5: Esther hasn't been holding back, per se, about her affliction, she was upfront about it to the nurse, and has answered Maria's questions, so I don't think it's a 'secret', but more of a bit of backstory that may be a bit hard to relive. none of this answers the question of what the affliction is but I'm sure that'll be addressed, I'm sure of it

snuffysam

I don't think it's anything particularly sinister or mysterious, just, like... some uncommon disease. like magic polio.

though i suppose it either has to be something difficult to explain or something with a big stigma attached to it?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 6. Do you think we’ll see the paladin who scolded Maria at the tournament again? Why do you think he seemed particularly critical of Maria? What role might he have to play in Maria’s life (and Esther’s by association)?

RebelVampire

1) i really enjoyed the scene where maria was with her friends and referred to esther as lovely and all maria's friends are like O/////O. i enjoyed it not only for the significant character development maria is showing, but also the sheer comedy in how oblivious maria is to anything to do with love. 2) maria. i like her intense honesty that is balanced by her flawed obliviousness to a lot of the things around her. i think its a combination that makes her extremely endearing as a character. 3) i think the clock is ticking. esther is clearly terrible at hiding it and stuffing her feelings down. and i think one day maria is gonna be like "i love this thing" and esther is gonna be like "oh yeah i love that thing almost as much as i love you." like maybe not that exactly, but i dont think esther will overcome shyness. i think its gonna be a pure mortification accident moment cause esther will be lost in her own brain thoughts.

4) maria's feelings are definitely changing. no doubt about it. as for a reaction to esther's confession...honestly maria is so dense i wouldnt be surprised if she just could comprehend a love confession. gets told "i love you" and shes like "i love you too....youre a dear friend." once she realizes though, i kind of feel like shell...limbo turn down esther and tell esther shes not sure how she feels. then decide and couple will be created. as for ruining their friendship, eh, therell be tension maybe? not friendship ruining tho cause maria is just too nice for that. 5) I'm gonna assume that it was some sort of injury to be honest. cause esther did mention wanting to be an adventurer and i could see esther being overenthusiastic and trying something dangerous and winding up permanently injured because of it. or poisoned maybe. thats also an option. but regardless the curitive magic came with a price. i think esther will tell maria the full story someday, and i think it will bring her and maria closer. and consequently cause maria to get ultra defensive against those questioning esther's honor. 6) i do think we'll see that paladin again, and boy am i looking forward to it. i want to know more about him cause i think the dynamic hed have with maria would be awesome. i think as far as role goes, he might be the one to challenge how maria handles herself as a knight and her general love obliviousness. because maria's friends and esther all kind of either find it endearing, support her, or just accept that is part of her. whereas i think this paladin could be the one to ask her if she isnt hurting others by being so oblivious to love while constantly giving everything of herself. or something like that.

snuffysam

ok i'm caught up i'm not sure about the paladin. because yeah maria's friends aren't exactly helping move this relationship forward but... why would the paladin do any better? he just seems like a jerk to me.

maybe he shows up again and gives maria something extra to vent about to esther?

also, apparently his name is marcus? at least that's what the cast page seems to say, it's hard to tell without pictures lol

thisintermezzo

I co-write this comic and aklsjdkjhffjk it's so cool to see people actually seriously talk about it??? Thank you so much for this. We almost never get actual responses--which is pretty normal for most comics; feedback is just hard to get, haha--so this is super novel and hugely appreciated. If you want to ask me anything, please feel free. Otherwise, I'm just going to spectate here and there. (Also, now that I have Discord again, I can try to similarly contribute to chats about people's comics!!)

snuffysam

welcome! this is a really cute comic! if I may ask a question - what was originally on this page?: http://lovespellscomic.com/post/162477687227/hey-this-post-may-contain-adult-content-so-weve

it was after a bunch of guest comics so i'm guessing it was another guest comic? but tumblr deleted it so i have no idea

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Do you believe Esther’s magic tutelage of Maria will pay off at a critical juncture at some point? How might Esther’s own skills change due to contact with Maria? How might their changing relationship affect their professional lives?

thisintermezzo

I can't tell, haha. I actually don't know what the page before that is, even, since the "back" button is gone. Tumblr is lame and didn't notify us of any of the flagged posts, so I have no clue what else has gotten randomly deleted. :U Tapas would have it all, though.

Thanks for letting us know, though! o/

RebelVampire

QUESTION 8. Do you think Maria’s friends will play a role in Esther and Maria’s budding relationship? If so, what role will they play and how might their own relationships with Maria change?

(the archive for the chat on Psychteria is up! @CalimonGraal https://comicteaparty.com/post/181287718835/december-10th-december-16th-2018-ctp-archive)

RebelVampire

@snuffysam sometimes strangers are more helpful than friends in certain contexts. cause friends can come with a lot of biases. but eh it was just a thought

7) I def hope esther's magic tutelage pays off. Though not sure when since the tournament seemed like the most dangerous thing to happen so far. but if maria goes on a mission for sure shes gonna be pulling out that crit move esther taught her and save the day. albeit alternatively i could also seeing it going the opposite. wherein maria tries and fails hardcore. and then esther has to hug and comfort her and tell maria its okay. as for esther's skills, i actually think any change is gonna be less related to magic and more esther is gonna learn like how to express her feelings better or something. but this is something i dont forsee happening until they get together. 8) i dont think the friends are gonna help. rather, i think after maria and esther get together maybe that theyre gonna hurt the relationship in a way. in that theyll get jelly of maria spending more and more time with esther. cause while maria sees esther a lot, theres clearly more freetime maria has she could spend with esther instead of her friends. and i could see maria doing that cause as nice as maria is, shes extremely inexperienced in this area. so i think shed put esther first way too hardcore at first and the friends would have to say whoa there hold your horses. i think at the end itll strengthen their bonds though cause itd give maria a better understanding of some of the experiences her friends have maybe. idk. im spitballing.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. If Esther and Maria do date, how do you believe that will go? What relationship obstacles might the two have to overcome in order to make their relationship work? How will the change affect the course of the story?

Delphina

Oh noooo, cute magical girl AND lawful good swordy girl having adorable crushes on each other. I might have to jump into this one.

1. My anime roots are showing, but I love a good "you don't have to refer to me with honorifics" scene. Also any time Maria carries sleepy Esther around is adorable.

2. Maria's hard not to like. I'm also a sucker for strong intense ladies who wanna do the right thing always.

I'm not so great with the speculation-type questions, but it's a great comic and I'm looking forward to what happens and hope that things go smoothly in both the romantic and magical arenas! The writing is very sweet and pure and the character designs and great environments complement them nicely. Really can tell there's a lot of love in this story!

RebelVampire

QUESTION 10. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

Delphina

I really enjoyed the part where Esther was explaining her sketches about adventuring to Maria. Esther has mostly been a reactive character - she gets orders and reacts, she's asked for help by Maria and she reacts, she sees some kids in trouble and she reacts, she gets low on MP and reacts. But that was the first time we saw what she wanted for herself, and how she views her role, and it really helped make her feel real and more proactive. I hope we see more of what Esther wants and who she is in the future!

RebelVampire

9) I think they'll have to deal with the usual relationship challenges. balancing work life, balancing other friendships, accepting that maybe they dont know each other as well as they think they might. but i think theyll manage. esther especially i think is gonna have to learn to be more open like how she was about her desire to be an adventurer. 10) I'm looking forward to seeing paladin returning and revealing why he's in this story in the first place and butting heads with maria. and then esther being "it's okay baby hes just a big ol' meanie"

snuffysam

i just really want to see more of the comic. it's super cute, the characters all lovable... i need more.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Lovespells this week! Please also give a special thank you to Ryan & Sage for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Lovespells, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

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