#i will need to do EVERYTHING again. for no reason. DEFINITELY for no reason caused by me.

[winchestermysterymachine]

how much can you do with the winchesters in 15 minutes?

Dean Winchester

dean winchester and quickies are like two peas in a pod. there isn't really a day where you and dean don't sneak off to do something together. but i think dean's control is already so tarnished. poor baby was in hell, purgatory. he's super pent up and just needs release after release. quickies are more of the time when dean is more in the dominant mood though, but he can't hold himself back to save his life. it starts off innocent enough, cooking, cleaning baby, showering alone. if you're cooking, he's turning to stove or whatever down and hoisting you onto the counter to have his way with you before you eat together. if you're cleaning baby, he's bending you over the hood and hitting it from the back. if you're showering together, don't ever think you'll be alone for longer than ten minutes. dean is definitely the easiest to make cum out of the three of them. quickest way to make him finish is sucking him off. he absolutely adores when you get on your knees for him, completely naked, looking very fucked out, and all you want is to please him? yeah. especially if he was just inside you. he's gonna make you cum, and then watching you sink to your knees to finish him off. he feels like a video game character who's just been murdered by a sexy sorceress in battle. a battle he's willing to loose all the time. the quickest dean has ever made you finish was probably the first time he brought in the vibrator. it wasn't something you had ever used before, not ever really wanting to use it, he suggested it. mostly for himself though, but he's in missionary, and for some reason you're a little lost in your own though ts of the day. probably cause he died and was suddenly alive again, but the reason doesn't matter i suppose. everything feels great, but you just won't relax for a few seconds long enough to get absolutely lost in the pleasure like he needs. so when you're least expecting it, he doesn't stop, but he does lean over to the bed side table, opens the drawer and pulls out the pink vibrator he'd bought online. he switches it on before your eyes open, before you're able to ask why he's moving around so much. he presses it against your clit. rough, meaning serious business. this was also probably the most serious dean had ever been during sex. the vibrations shocked you so bad your eyes widen, you gripped the sheets and your thoughts literally melted right out of your brain and he had you right where he wanted you. i think he's also a huge teasing shit when you're in the middle of a quickie. if you think he was a smooth talker before, then now he won't keep his trap shut. he keeps whispering how you better be quiet or else sam's gonna know, someone's gonna walk out to see you bent over baby's hood, grab food from the kitchen. he's annoying but it's okay.

“I can do a lot with 15 minutes, only gonna take two to make you finish.”

Sam Winchester

sam winchester and quickies are never really a thing that's ever used in the same sentence. unless, the boys have to stay in a motel for the next few days. it's too much to buy two rooms all the time, so you're stealing baby as much as you can. every food run, ever trip to the library or coffee in the morning always starts and ends with sex in the car. for a while you'd feel bad having sex in dean's car. especially if he's dead, or in purgatory i guess. but, let's say the boys are working on a pretty long and hard case that takes you away from the bunker to a different state. and just the sound of the news article made the case present itself as something that wasn't a walk in the park. so you'd go with them, helping out by collecting books from libraries, heading to the store to grab the goods or snack runs, making coffee and breakfast, basically just doing the simple thing's so they can focus on finding out who they need to kill. after you and sam get together, you're not exactly allowed into the line of fire after a particularly terrible case for you, but anyway, you're happy to help make coffee if it means not being alone at the bunker. and the longer the case goes on, the more stressed the boys are and beers and day time tv are no longer easing the edge. and sam won't stop staring at you it's making you nervous and you know what he wants, he knows you know. but you can't do it there in front of dean... right? now yeah right of course. so you suggest to sam if he wants to go to the store and grab some more snacks and drinks while dean does... whatever dean does when you're gone. sam is off the couch in seconds with an arm around your waist pulling you out to the car. he's getting in the car but not going to the grocery store, not yet, he pulls off to an empty side road and making you ride him until the fog in his brain clears. he's kissing you and whispering about how you're the best thing in the world cause he knows the exact monster that's been messing with sam and dean all week. this happens a lot more often than either you or sam thought it ever was gonna happen. sometimes you do stay back at the bunker, especially if the case is something they already think they've come across before. but you don't really like to. the amount of times you've stayed behind and had only one boy come back to you is haunting. the quickest sam's ever cum is probably when you talk back to him. dean doesn't let the poor boy control most thing's in his life aside from what clothing he puts on his body, so when you start talking back to him during sex? saying no? he's fucking you harder, making you agree to whatever it is he originally wanted without a second thought, and its you breaking that makes him cum so quick, just a few seconds after you started babbling in agreement to whatever he said. the thing that's made you cum the quickest was the first time in the bunker. being able to be as loud as you wanted, no interruptions, space, time, it felt like the first time again and you probably went round after round for a few hours until neither of you could go any more. 

“Say something bat shit crazy, I'll do it, don't you make me.”

Castiel

castiel has so much self control, it's almost difficult to bring him to orgasm. he just needs to relax for a second, which isn't something an angelic soldier lets himself feel easily. he doesn't really do quickies either, and prefers everything to be as long and as drawn out as possible cause it's castiel. he likes the waiting game, likes the long run. he's definitely more into giving you pleasure anyway, although he likes it you giving him head or whatever. if you suggest a quickie he's like 'why would we do it fast when we can just go slow and take out time?'. castiel not understanding time is so funny to me. i mean, castiel being able to last so long is a blessing and a curse, cause if you're not done then neither is he and you don't have to worry about taking a break. the best places you've had quickies are probably in random rooms in the bunker when neither of you wanted to be found, but you often don't need to have quickies because he'll just take you anywhere you want to go if you can't be alone. the quickest he's ever finished was probably just in an hour, and it's always when you two try thing's for the first time. it's the new sensations that he's never felt, or hadn't felt in a long time. it doesn't matter who's on top, he always finishes quickly when you try something for the first time. of course it's a lot longer than an average man would take, but it's quicker than he usually finishes. the quickest he's ever made you finish was probably when he was being dominant for the first time. you were getting ready to ride him, something casual in your bunker bedroom when he suddenly just grabbed your hips, flipping you over and putting you under him instead. first time being dominant, as well as his first time being on top, telling you what to do. it was so unexpected from how you two usually had sex that your brain wasn't keeping up with everything, getting lost in the pleasure. he's probably like 'wow that was the fastest i have ever brought you to orgasm!' you definitely had to teach him how to talk dominant. he already is a strong guy, but after that his verbage needed some practice. he will never do it in dean's car. not even eat you out. it's dean's car, his baby and cas gets that in a way. he doesn't want to do that kind of thing knowing it'll piss dean off and embarrass you. 

“Lot of pretty boys, lot of funny business.”

so, did it only take you two to make him finish?

[yuukei-yikes]

idr if ive sent an ask like this before but. im sending it again if so.

forever thinking about how shintaro lost all three of his only friends on the same day. the anniversary of his dad dying, too.

so yeah. while he is extremely cringefail. i would shut myself in for four years too if that happened to me. like understandable have a nice day.

shintaro goes thru the horrors and we should talk about that more. like almost every route, on or near the anniversary of his dad and three of his only friends dying, he has to like. we all know it varies on who dies but in general he has to witness at least some of his new friends die.

paired with retaining. top ten characters that go thru it. shintaro wouldnt be number one bc hibiya and kano but hed be like. number three? i guess?

deciding on Who suffers more is a little pointless because it feels kind of bad to be like so what's worse? pretending to be your sister's corpse or a timeloop of 10 years? Like both are bad

however ur so right. shintaro is my little meow meow cringe fail idiot prince. something i love about kagepro and i think it's genuinely really well done is the representation of mental health. shintaro loses all 3 of his friends in one day, of course he's going to react like this. he's even under the impression one of them killed herself directly because of him. this guy's a messssss. iirc, in the novels at one point he even says why was i the only one left? so he definitely also had a bit of survivor's guilt there as well. tbh i think everyone in the dan had some survivor's guilt in regards to the person they died with. why was i chosen and not them? cause in kido's pov it also sounds like that when talking abt rin.

anywaysss. so shintaro is a funny guy. depressed king and with reasons to be sad and traumatized, he's got a strong sense of justice and always acts on what he thinks is right. it's funny that he's also so painfully awkward and anxious, but i think the whole beginning arc of kagepro really tells u who he is. shintaro is shown not being able to even TALK to customer service employees, cause he mumbles everything and stumbles over his words, yet like an hour later he's YELLING AT AN ARMED ROBBER THATS GRABBING HIM BY THE NECK. BOY WHAT😭 shintaro's principles always coming on top of anything else he might be feeling is awesome. it shows again in novel 7 when he's kinda awesome and smooth facing saeru and right after falls to his knees bc mary and kido said it wasn't That cool.

and this is all without mentioning retaining eyes. bro post str shintaro. what a delight. i love him. i wrote a stupid shintaro&takane fanfic once where i sorta go into it of how weird it is for him to live past That august, with everything he knows now. if u care here's a link *kicks rock*

shintaro is already pretty self centered as is. but i think very early on post str, now that retaining has been activated, all the routes bleed together and makes him very confused. and this time forever because retaining has been activated and he's. going to be alive from now on. no more resets. so he HAS to deal with it.

a genius or not, a human brain isn't Made to hold onto different memories of different lifetimes like this, so i think post str shintaro can't help being insensitive to others (in that fanfic i wrote, shintaro realizes him and takane in this final route never talked about her as ene, so while to him it was normal bc of retaining, she was still needing some closure on it)

and now ill mention my kagefuture bullshit SORRY!!! SORRY!!! idk if u even read my fancomic but basically shintaro is acting a little stupid in there. like acting without thinking stupid. i find it very fun to imagine an older shintaro doing that because he's spent so much time Stressing about what's happening and what's going to happen because it's finally different from other routes and that's scary, that to get to the point where he's a little more chill about it, it's inadvertently accomplished by Not Thinking. i like to imagine him living day to day without thinking of what will happen later because if he does that he'll spiral. so he sort of ends up in these weird situations like man. how did i not see this one coming

[sysig]

Coding woes (Patreon)

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

[prosypepper]

sensitive ft. toji fushiguro

to be as strong and high-spirited as you are, toji was definitely caught off-guard when he found you crying for the first time.

it didn’t happen on purpose, either. there was no sign as to why you’d be upset, you hadn’t told him anything all day that could even lead to you being so sad, sobbing hysterically into his pillow.

but that didn’t matter. all toji understood was that you were upset, sad, angry, something; and he needed to make it better. so there he stood, frozen in his tracks for a while, an unfamiliar pang in his chest at your cries—the sound alone almost upset him, for some reason.

you didn’t notice toji until he slid into bed behind you, easily scooping up your body in his arms and moving you around to rest on his chest, your arms still grasping the pillow. your cries got even harder for a second at the realization toji had you.

“hey, hey,” toji spoke, calmly, soft, “what’s wrong, babydoll?”

toji’s brows furrowed when you only sniffled and hyperventilated for a minute, chest heaving as you attempted to catch your breath—to no avail. if it wasn’t for you practically melting into his touch, he would’ve thought he was making the situation even worse.

“baby,” toji whispered, waiting for a moment before pressing your head into the middle of his chest, “breathe.” his palm ran over your head repeatedly, taking big, deep breaths of his own in hopes you’d follow after. he could feel your tears soaking through his shirt, making big, wet spots, but at that moment, he cared for nothing more than to make you feel better.

like magic, your breathing began to slow down, sniffles becoming less frequent, the clutch you had on the pillow softening. toji took a big sigh of relief at that. he held you like that for a solid fifteen minutes, gently rocking you back and forth with his body.

yet toji didn’t count the minutes, he just stayed. stayed until you stopped crying, until your breathing was back to normal, until there was no sign of woe in the room. he rested his chin atop your head for a little, stroking your arm with his fingertips.

“you okay?” toji asked, almost awkwardly, when obviously, you were not okay.

“mhm,” you hummed, eyes open and staring at the window next to your shared bed.

“hey,” toji repeated, drawing his head back, your sad, wet eyes attracted to his like magnets, “none of that. what’s wrong?” just the simple question caused tears to well up in your eyes again, but you blinked them away and sighed.

“don’t know,” you said, resting your head on his chest by yourself that time, “overwhelmed, i guess. and i watched a sad movie. everything jus’ got to me at once.”

toji frowned, knowing he had no idea that life was piling up on you—and he hadn’t done anything to help beforehand.

“‘m sorry, baby,” he apologized, pecking a kiss to the top of your head, “didn’t know you were so stressed.”

“it’s not your fault, toji,” you replied, nuzzling into his chest, “i just suck at communicating.”

“that makes two of us,” he paused, thinking deeply about what to say next, “you can tell me whatever. scream, cry, hit me, i don’t care.”

“toji, i’m not gonna hit you,” you giggled, a smile finally creeping on your face—the smile toji had been waiting for since he first saw you so upset.

and for once in his life, with you in his arms, toji thought he was doing something right.

[letstrywritingmaybe]

I just finished reading Lolita mostly because I see the term more often than I care for in fics, so I needed to know the source of it, and it’s definitely not for me. I get the importance of it and why it’s controversial, but again this is one of those classics that I’m like eh. Like tbh the fanfic with the same title was way more enjoyable than this literary classic. But that’s because I don’t vibe with the character, and while I can understand him in a way, I don’t really care to. I don’t think the book is horrible, but it’s passable.

But now that I see where the term comes from, I can confirm what I already knew. I don’t care for the ShinAi dynamic as much as the rest of the fandom. Then again I never did like any types of “forbidden love” (though in the novel it was definitely not love, but that’s an argument idc to go into. Though I suppose if you believed it was love then maybe it was real in a way, but it’s real an illness. Which again people have compared love to)

Unrelated update: I strictly read CoAi fics yes, but I do dabble in other Shiho ships as long as the canon ship is not also tagged cause fuck that noise. Plus I need to see a jealous Shinichi over my queen. Unfortunately we don’t have enough fics of other Shiho ships. Which needs to be remedied for sure. Since I’ve been writing a tiny bit of these ships, I decided to poke around the tags and see what was out there. I’m glad I did cause I just read the cutest Shigo fic and I’m so here for it. Honestly if this was the endgame I wouldn’t be mad, I know so many people hate on it. But as a fangirl, I really love the idea that my queen is good enough to get with her celebrity crush. Also as a massive sports fan, which none of you are, you really just don’t get it. Which is insane to me cause it’s the same as being a fan of anything else! You get excited and emotional and want to be better for the thing/person you love and you can be irrational and jealous. Hello yall over here with your ship wars, be for real, you’re not better than any of us for being open with our fangirling. So yeah when I see people criticize Shigo it just makes me want to ship it more. People claim it’s ooc, but it’s really fucking not. She’s still a teenager, she’s allowed to have these kinds of emotions. Heck even if she were to be into boy bands instead I would support it. We have layers, we’re more than just one thing. Don’t just shove her into the emotionless scientist corner cause she’s a cool girl. She can be both, and she is. Let her live. Literally just let her live, it’s all I ask from canon

[777heavengirl]

spill your guts

sirius black x reader one-shot ! warnings: miscommunication? (apparently, that’s all ik how to write), friends to lovers, mentions of injury, no war AU! word count: 6,730 masterlist a/n: sorry I've been MIA uni is BEATING my ass and i rewrote this like 35 times, enjoy!

“I have this dream that I am hitting my dad with my quidditch bat” Sirius's clammy skin and the breeze that flew in from the window you had slightly cracked open when he awoke hyperventilating, caused goosebumps to crawl up his skin. You stayed quiet at his confession, your eyes trained on his face but his burned holes into your baby blue duvet. “And all he does is scream and cry for help-“

He took a sharp breath, this was one of those rare times when everything rotting inside him tried spilling out. For many years it was just James and Remus, Peter occasionally, but now he found that he couldn’t help but want to spill his guts to you. You stayed quiet as he spoke, scared to say anything that would cause him to shut himself in again.

”And maybe halfway through, I realized that it has more to do with me killing him than it ever did protecting myself.” Sirius never spoke of his father. His mother usually plagued his nightmares and it was the abuse he was more inclined to share.

Not his father's.

”He was really pushing his luck-“ His dry laugh, seemed cruel, but you could see how his fingers fidgeted, playing with a small thread on the edge of his boxers. The need to light a cigarette flashed in his mind. 

You knew the man was dead. You were with Sirius and the rest of the marauders the day he was buried. After everyone else had left the funeral, the brothers stared at the coffin on the altar of the mausoleum the rest of their family rested in. Regulus didn’t speak a word but gripped Sirius’s arm with white-hot knuckles. Sirius put his cigarette out on the shiny, polished wood, one last act of defiance. His brother nodded, almost as if in approval, but not quite, and apparated away with their family house elf soon after. Sirius linked his arm with yours. You didn’t ask how he died, nor did you ask about the brothers' relationship now that both of their abusers were dead and buried. Now that everything between them rotted away.

You never wanted to push the boundary more than he’d let you. Your relationship, if that’s what you could call it, was already precarious as it was.

Tonight had started like many others, Sirius knocking at your door. The flat you shared with Dorcas in front of the one he shared with Peter and Remus. And you answered, you always did.

“you look good tonight-“ You thought the way too small sleeping shorts were the reason he said so, it wasn’t the mismatched socks or the oversized muggle band tee you had stolen from their dorm fifth year. Definitely not the messy, bed-ridden hair. He had only seen your face, the glint in your eyes, and the pull of your smile. That had been enough for him to decide you were the most beautiful creature on the planet. “can I sleep in your bed?” You said yes.

You always said yes.

You didn’t have sex. But you slept together, his fingertips digging into the supple skin of your waist as he slept with his face buried in your neck. You often played with his hair, tracing spirals on his back until he snored softly. You wouldn’t have guessed that tonight would end up with him waking up, in a cold sweat and gasping for breaths, much less confessing his dreams of murdering his already deceased father.

You didn't hold that against him.

You took a hesitant hold of his trembling fingers, he seemed to welcome the touch as he intertwined his fingers with yours.

He pulled you close to him again after he laid back down. The window remained open with the nippy night breeze flowing in, but his skin eventually lost its goosebumps and his grip ultimately loosened, he was soft and warm and moldable now. He melted onto your side and you couldn't help but stare. At his perfect nose and perfect lips, the weight of the world that he held on his shoulders faded away when he slept, even if just for a few hours. 

You reveled in the fact that it was your bed he felt this comfortable in.

You hoped it was only yours.

-

Even the mornings where he had crawled out of your bed and your flat, the ones where you awoke alone and cold, he stayed in your head. He had imprinted himself on your mind, he had made it his home. Sirius Black, the man you were not dating, but the man you shared your bed with, occasionally made breakfast with in between fits of laughter. The man who had declared very loudly, and very drunkenly, that you'd make the perfect girlfriend at a party four months ago, and yet continued to ignore any hint that there might be something else between the two of you. Your bed felt cold the rare nights he didn't knock at your door, at this point your entire apartment called for his presence. Dorcas joked that he was your third roommate.

You always wondered if he had found some muggle girl to woo for the night, sleep in her foreign bed, and disappear in the morning. You wondered if he ever stayed 'til the morning in their beds, if he enjoyed them more than he enjoyed you. If your bed and your embrace weren't enough.

Until there was a knock at your door, the clock marked 1:27 am.

"A long time ago, my great-great-great-great-grandfather took something that did not belong to him," You wondered if this would also become ritual, him baring his heart naked. Baring his family's sins, his sins, to you. As if your divine acceptance would tip the scales, and that it would weigh his heart as pure. Your skin was the one riddled with goosebumps this time, as the cold that seeped through the window nipped at the thin material of your shirt and you duvet stayed discarded at the foot of the bed. You didn't mind it. He blew the smoke of his cig out the open window and turned to look at you again, unapologetically staring into your eyes. "And that is why I kind of look the way I do, 'm part Veela," you wondered if his confessions were a new level of intimacy you had gained access to. 

"As if I couldn't tell," he gave you a crooked smirk, the type he gives you when he's about to make some obscene, dirty joke. He didn't this time though. You visibly saw his shoulders relax when you made a quick quip, ignoring the heavy atrocity of his ancestors. It wasn't him after all, why would you hold it against him? He hummed, reveling secretly in your compliment. Maybe you genuinely did think he was beautiful. Regardless of the tattoos that now littered his body, or the scars of abuse that would never leave him, or even the random bruises that sometimes stained his porcelain skin, from his bike, from Moony's transformations, from everything. Maybe you even saw past the commitment issues, and unspoken words, or the fact that he left you to wake up to an empty bed often.

Maybe, somehow, you were able to look past all of that. All of him.

Sirius knew it was wishful thinking.

-

“Don’t look at me like that Moony,” Sirius said with a groan as he stood at the door, still holding the handle from closing it. Remus glared at him from the top of his cup as he sipped his tea, Sirius really wanted to skip the whole lecture, you woke up early meaning he also had to, and had to make the treacherous journey across the hall. He glanced at the clock on the wall, it glanced 6:30 am back at him. Why was Remus even awake?

“you’re a prat Padfoot-“

”I needed some sleep, it's not like we're-“

“It doesn’t matter, what you’re doing to that poor girl is horrible, if you really can’t sleep drink some tea, go to a physician” Remus turned his back to Sirius, angrily cleaning his cup in the sink, although he couldn’t see him, Sirius knew Remus’s face was twisted into one of disappointment and anger. “you know she loves you, and you use it instead of telling her there will never be anything between you-“

”I love her”

”You’re not in love with her, are you?” He turned the water off, turning around with a glare as Sirius stayed quiet. “She is.”

Sirius didn’t know what he felt for you if he was honest. He loved you, though. He had always loved you. From the days you ran around with the four of them around Hogwarts, when you passed notes in class, when you accompanied him on secret trips to the kitchens, when you helped clean his wounds at Potter Manor the summer he ran away. Sirius has always loved you.

Remus might think that’s worse.

”Stop sleeping with her and having breakfast with her the morning after, Merlin-“ he took a deep breath, his fingers coming up to rub his temples in frustration and the Welsh accent seeped into his words, “What the hell are you thinking Sirius?”

Remus knew he was being tough, but he felt bad. He felt bad about the way your eyes always trailed after the boy, and how you always stared at Sirius’s closed bedroom door when you were over for tea. You needed to be able to move on with your life. It didn’t help you and Dorcas lived right in front of them.

”Alright Moony,” 

“You’ll leave her alone?” Sirius refused to meet the taller boy's eyes.

”I’ll try”

- 

Sirius did not listen to Remus. 

He never did really, but he felt guilty now. He stared at you from your bed, you paced around stripping away the day, being a healer at St Mungo's was an arduous job most days. Some it was just kids with dragon pox and their mothers who came with worry stitched in their souls, doing rounds with residents that had been there longer than you, the older ladies always gave you candy. You didn't know where they were getting it from. Most nights you dragged yourself into your apartment late enough you might as well say it’s morning, and dropped, ruined and exhausted, on your bed. The worst days, it was back-to-back shifts of trying to heal curses, creature attacks, and mysterious maladies that left you drained and hopeless. Ones that made you fear the magical world that surrounded you. These nights you would've sought Sirius out, the way he did you, but you didn't need to. He was always there, somehow knowing and waiting outside your door. Sometimes, he was just exiting his apartment, going to knock on yours when you came up the stairs, other nights, like this one, he waited for you. He sat on the floor with his back against your door and his eyes closed until he heard your footsteps. He stood and greeted you silently with a kiss to your temple.

He trailed after you, into your room and onto your bed. So he sat, his back against the wall and the bottom parts of his legs hanging from the bed. He didn't say much, he observed as you sighed and sniffed, wiping your eyes as you muttered to yourself. He watched in awe as you took off the green healer robes they made you wear, your buttoned shirt coming off with it. 

“I don’t understand how hard it is to keep your kid away from places like those, the kid was barely five and now he has all these welts-“ you huffed in frustration as you stripped off your pants and walked into the bathroom, the door open so you could continue to ramble “how does a five-year-old get cursed? I had to call the Ministry-“

Sirius didn’t think he could deny the fact that he reveled in these moments, he couldn't hide it for the life of him. The ones where you were so comfortable with him, walking around in your mismatched underwear angrily rambling about negligent mothers and how now you have to testify at the Ministry next week. It was laced with domesticity and a cloying sweetness that covered his skin. He wanted to stop you and kiss you silly. To sleep with you, in all your naked glory, and not care because you’d be together. He shook away the need to keep you for himself. He shuffled close to the edge of the bed, his feet finally touching the floor and he picked up a trinket on your nightstand. He bought it for you when he visited France last summer. He promised Regulus he'd gone to see him a few days. It went well, he realized. He also thought of the fact he didn't tell you that's what he went to do.

”Sirius?"

"Hm?" he finally focused back on your words, his eyes flickering back to you and the small smile that formed on your lips when you saw what he had in his hand. 

"I said, what'd you reckon will happen to the kid?" your smile faded, and you picked nervously at your cuticles as you thought about him. Would they take him away? Would he be put in an orphanage? It was protocol you had no other choice but to call... and yet you couldn't stop thinking about it. You started moving around your room again, like a bee collecting pollen from flowers. Bees were cute, right? Sirius hoped you wouldn't think he was silly, Bees were cute, he decided. You grabbed a couple of items of clothing, collecting them in one arm as the other one massaged your scalp. 

"I dunno," he remembered to answer now, "I had never thought about it,"

He could hear you turn on the shower, but you padded back into the room as the water warmed. You looked at him, still in your underwear, the eye bags underneath your eyes were visible, your makeup long faded by now. 

"You never went because of your mum?" He shook his head, and you shuffled closer, the side of your leg pressed against the bed and your knee knocking with his as you looked down at him. Your hand went to caress his hair instinctively, his soft glossy curls sliding through your fingers easily. "I'm sorry no one noticed Sirius," this part was a whisper now, you feared overstepping a boundary you weren't aware of. He smiled at you, his hand coming up to pinch your naked side. 

You yelped and batted his hand away with a laugh. 

"She's good and dead now, I reckon it doesn't matter anymore-" He gave you a saddened smile, his nimble fingers grabbing a hold of your hand pulling you closer to him again. It was private moments like this, that confused you. The intimacy of it all, the way his lips pressed against the back of your hand and looked at you through half-lidded eyes. You were suddenly hyper-aware of how naked you actually were. You had been friends for the majority of your life, shame was long gone, but when you were so close you could feel his breath across the stretch of your tummy, it felt different.

"I reckon it does matter," You pressed a small kiss to his forehead and unpeeled yourself from him, "don't bury it all inside you, Mr Black"

You floated away now, in the sea of your anxiety over your actions, closing the bathroom door behind you. 

Sirius had a lot of destructive behaviors, he knew that. The smoking since he was fifteen, the reckless way he rode his motorcycle around, the growing collection of tattoos on his body, the tumultuous relationship he had with his brother, Merlin definitely the excessiveness in which he drank, not to mention the way he showed up at the Potter's every once in a while seeking James's comfort and unconditional love, ignoring the fact that the man was a father and had a million things on his shoulders. Lily didn’t seem to mind. At least he was a decent godfather, took care of Harry to perfection, it took a few tries but he got it. Loved him with his entire heart. But you, Sirius, thought you might be the worst of it.

The worst thing he’s ever done to himself is allow for this domesticity between you.

You came back from your shower with your hair slightly damp and smelling of your signature body wash scent, sweet and enveloping. The oversized shirt that covered your torso was almost long enough to cover 'til your upper thighs. It made Sirius’s lips curl into a lopsided smile that he tried to repress.

He was lying down now, starfishing on your bed as he stared at the ceiling.

”Are you coming to bed?” The clock blinked 3 AM at you, and Sirius reached his hand out. You walked closer to him, a small smile playing on your lips. You sent the towel you had been using back to its spot with a swish of your hand. Basic handless magic was a difficult skill to gain but Merlin so gratifying. 

“I forgot my pants silly,” he shook his head no, and reached for your hand with a bit more effort, grabbing a hold of it and pulling you down with him.

”Let’s just sleep, you don’t need those-“ He covered the two of you with your heavy duvet as you laughed, he leaned over you to turn off the lamp on your nightstand.

Yes, Sirius thought as he buried his face in the crook of your neck and threw one of his arms over your torso. You were the worst thing he had ever done to himself. He would never be able to let go, your hands stroking his hair until one of you fell asleep, the small ‘night that slipped past your lips just as your eyes fluttered shut. He'd never get enough of your saccharine scent that enveloped him like a blanket, comforting and warm. All-encompassing and suffocating, in each other’s arms every night, in the comfort of your room. 

Sirius knew it deep in his heart, what he had been afraid of for so long. Maybe Remus had it all wrong, maybe he was in love with you.

Because what else could this feeling be?

-

You tried to ignore the ache in your heart when you woke up to an empty bed. You tried to forget the fact that you’d probably do it all again tonight, and the next night too, all to bear the fruit of nothing. 

Dorcas shook her head and she pushed a cup of coffee towards you. 

“Don’t look at me like that Dorcas -“

”I love Sirius as much as the next guy but-“ you picked up the coffee and sighed at its warmth “He’s being a prat honey-“

”It's not like we’ve been having sex, he just needs some sleep” You shook your head and looked away, afraid that your eyes would betray you, “hell I needed sleep too”

”It doesn’t matter, Y/N you’re a healer get him a stock of sleeping draught and yourself some too while you’re at it…” She furrowed her brows but you stayed quiet, not daring to meet her gaze “I know you love him, but I’m not so sure he sees you that way-“

” I’m not in love with him”

“I didn’t say you were in love,” Dorcas sighed now, placing her cup on the sink and walking towards the small chimney in your flat. “Promise me it won’t happen anymore, that you’ll try to break it off”

”I’ll try Dorcas,” she didn’t believe you much, you didn’t believe yourself either, the Floo Flames engulfed her body.

It was hard to, separate yourself from him that is. Sirius Black was addicting, simply from the way he moved. Just watching him is entrancing on its own. Speaking to him, with his suave words and low tone. Everything about him, everyone craved to have a simple conversation, have even an ounce of his attention. Sleeping in his arms though, heart to heart? Now that was in a league of its own. 

-

You dragged yourself into your building, the day bearing down on you. You half hoped that Sirius would be waiting outside your door again, sitting waiting for you to lay in his arms. Disappointment added to the sack of bricks you felt like you were carrying when you turned to see the empty hallway. You sluggishly made your way up to your door, hoping to see Sirius's head pop out of his apartment door. Giggles came down your hall, as you fiddled with your keychain trying to find your key. The drunken whispers got louder and just as you grabbed a hold of your key you heard your name echo softly down the hall.

You dropped your keys in surprise as you took in the sight. Sirius stood rather close to a short woman, her bubbling laughter and her roaming hands didn't stop when he let his arm drop from her shoulders. All color drained from his face and his drunk, loose smile fell quickly from his lips. The girl that clung to him like gum to a shoe hadn’t noticed your presence nor how Sirius seemed to sober up at the sight of you.

You scrambled to pick up your keys as the blonde started whispering in his ear, starting to pull at him again. He called out your name one more time, moving towards you now, dragging the poor girl down the hallway with him.

“have a good night Sirius-“ 

You miraculously managed to get your key in the hole swiftly, turn it, open, and lock yourself inside just in time. Pressing your back against the door, your heart felt like it might leap out of your chest. You had always hoped that he wasn’t seeing other people, or meeting anyone else. And the absence of encounters just like this one had solidified that thought, you were properly convinced. Now though. You had just been lucky enough to not encounter them. You thought back, it was impossible not to feel like Sirius’s look had been one of guilt. Like he got caught. But the two of you weren’t anything.

You were painfully reminded of that fact tonight.

You hadn't noticed how fast or how hard your heart was beating. You felt like it was ready to break through your ribs, leaving you shattered and with a void in your chest. But it didn't do such a thing. No, you stayed perfectly intact, even as you felt the panic batter your chest and the notion that you were definitely not the only woman in his life torturing your heart.

"What's wrong?" Dorcas said in a whisper as she looked up, her large glasses sliding down her nose. The yellow lamps that decorated your apartment gave Dorcas's dark skin a low golden tone, like the type you'd see in paintings of candlelights and sultry lounges. Marlene was over today, her short, bleached blonde strands fanning over her face as she slept with her head on Dorcas's lap, her arms wrapped around the girl's waist.  If it had been any other time you would've run for the muggle Polaroid camera Lily bought you, flashing a picture of the two of them.

"Sirius was just outside with some girl," Dorcas gasped now and shot up, dropping Marlene's head on the couch. The blonde groaned awake and asked what was wrong.

"Sirius brought home a girl" The blonde shot up as well and the girlfriends ran to the door, trying to look through the peephole. "Well this whole thing has gone arse over tit hasn't it?" Marlene pushed Dorcas off for her turn at the peephole. 

"There's no 'thing' between us anyway"

"Well, shit" The blonde outside kept pawing at Sirius, trying to reach his face, to eat it Marlene guessed. He stared at the door, trying to hold the girl who stuck to him back. Marlene felt as if she was in a staring competition. She knew Sirius couldn’t see her but she still liked the thought that she’d win.

Dorcas was the first to peel herself off of the door and pull you into a tight embrace. Her hand rubbed circles on your back and Marlene followed, embracing the two of you. They smelled coconut-y and sweet, even the remainder of Marlene's stronger perfume wafted over you ever so slightly. It was grounding, really, to be hugged tightly by your closest friends, the smell of home, the comfort of knowing that you were loved, even if it wasn't by him.

"I'll hex him for you if you want" Marlene's suggestion, although serious, wasn't necessary. You shook your head sighing. 

"He didn't do anything-" Dorcas flicked your head now, a frown forming on her face as the three of you parted. 

"Like hell, he didn't-"

"He doesn't owe me anything 'Cas don't be harsh"

"He's been sleeping in your bed for the better part of six months I reckon he owes you a lot" Dorcas gave you a look of pity now, like you were a wounded abandoned animal.

"I say we set his motorbike on fire," Marlene suggested casually like she was talking about the weather. You slowly peeled your layers off, as you dragged your feet towards your room. You knew the girls felt bad for you, but it was your fault. Who in their right mind would let Sirius Black so into their hearts, knowing that no commitment would ever come from it? 

You. 

You would. 

From his muscles softened under your touch, his warmth spreading to your body, to the way he mumbled in his sleep. It was something your soul craved to see, to feel, to hear. He had bewitched you, without you wanting him to, without meaning to allow him. You threw yourself on your bed, starfished and in your underwear, freshly showered. The water did not wash away the regret nor the hurt. They only made you think of coming back to Sirius in your bed, smiling and pulling you into his arms. Your sheets were cold, and tucked in neatly, very unlike the cozy mess Sirius usually made of it. So you stared, long and hard at the white of your ceiling. You prayed sleep would take you, you were exhausted. Like your body had been beaten, like your heart had split in two. 

No such sleep would overtake you. Instead, you could hear frantic knocks on your front door, your muscles twitched but you didn't dare move, like if you breathed he'd know. You heard Dorcas rip the door open, the force of it reverberating through your small flat. 

"You got some balls coming here," It was muffled, but you could still hear the venom in her voice. She didn't let him speak. "You're going to die cold, sad, and alone Black— don't you ever forget it" She threw the door closed now, the bang shaking your room again. It was jarring to hear that, especially from someone as sweet as Dorcas was, and she meant it. Hell, you felt like she would make sure of it, no matter the cost. 

"Sweetheart-" Dorcas spoke through the door, her knuckles grazing the wood but not quite knocking. You didn't answer.

A muffled she must be asleep, and you felt like you could breathe again. You knew Sirius wouldn't end up alone. If he did romantically, the friendships in his life would fulfill that void anyway. He had a family. Most of your friends were his, and you knew, that you could never ask any of them to walk around the uncomfortable wall that seemed to form between you, or god forbid pick sides. It was stupid, you knew there was no reason you should be upset. You were not together. You weren't anything to him, and he wasn't supposed to be to you.

But oh he was. He was everything.

-

On nights like these, you thought you might reach your limit and have to be admitted into the psychiatric ward of St Mungo's yourself. You felt sweaty, and the stuffy healer robes didn't help to ease the heat that crawled up your skin. Your hair felt frizzy and out of place, and your buttoned-up shirt felt like it was choking you, but you couldn't stop. You couldn't afford to nor could the patients that kept coming in. The St Mungo's emergency room was nothing short of a battleground, it was vile and the worst turn to get. Especially during the overnight shift. These were the types of shifts that made you second guess your career choice, the ones that made you want to throw in the towel and drag yourself back into your apartment and never come out. 

"Y/N come on, they're bringing in a flying vehicle accident-" you frowned as you let your turn partner drag you towards one of the newly entered patients. For the first time that shift, you felt dread crawl up your throat, your heart skipping a beat as you saw Sirius lying unconscious on the bed. For a second you thought you had forgotten how to breathe, your fingertips felt numb and your ears rang. His perfect nose was bloody, his perfect lip bruised and split. There were scrapes on his cheeks, and his jeans had been ripped and stained red. It wasn't noticeable at first, but the metallic smell and the caked-on blood on his black jacket became visible as you approached, it all made it clear, it had been bad.

You couldn't understand what your partner was telling you, the ringing in your ears too loud for you to make out the words, but as they moved Sirius onto a proper bed, it all came crashing down again. Repeated prayers of no's rang through your head along with pleas to a higher power to let this be a nightmare, one you'd wake up from cold and sweaty but knowing he's safe. No such relief came, and your fingertips buzzed with electricity once again, moving so fast it was like you moved at two times speed. You couldn't think of anything but prayers, to what? You didn't know, but you did so nevertheless. To the stars, and the heavens, or the magic that ran through your blood, through his. You didn't know. But you muttered words of hope and love, as you cleaned his wounds, hoping he'd hear you.

You busied yourself and basically assigned yourself to his care, after they moved him out of the ER, into one of the beds in the rows of other patients divided by sheets. You barely left his side, just to shower and change into the spare clothes Dorcas had brought you reluctantly, mildly upset you were taking care of Sirius. You ate next to him, talked to him, read your favorite poems, and hummed his favorite songs. He mumbled here and there, and his eyes would flutter sometimes which you took as a good sign but the tension didn't leave your shoulders, and your prayers never ended.

James, Remus, and Peter passed by, dropping some baked goods off and comforting you with teary hugs. 

"I told him that bloody bike would kill him-" Remus said as he shook his head and sat next to Sirius for a bit, his hand on the boy's knee.

"How's he doing doc?" you rolled your eyes, amusement played in James's eyes at the pull of your lips. He had always secretly been a worrywart, but he played it off well as if his heart didn't almost beat out of his chest when he got the call.

"As long as he wakes up he'll be fine-" He smiled genuinely now, "Few broken bones," He hummed, looking at Remus and Peter huddled next to Sirius's bed.

"few broken bones hm? wouldn't be the first time." You talked for a while, each one of you ignoring the nagging feeling of worry. Sirius's boisterous laugh was poignantly missing from the conversation. But soon enough, James's father's duties called and he pressed a kiss on Sirius's forehead and one on yours very fatherlike and apparated away, Remus and Peter gathered themselves up as well not long after.

"Call if anything, okay doll?" Remus pulled you into a tight hug, his lips pressing against your temple as well. Peter gave you a small hug, his eyes trailing over Sirius's form sadly. 

You were left alone again, the window panes that surrounded the hall letting some moonlight in. Time felt like a thick jelly, your eyes staring at the clock as you ran your hands through his hair, the exhaustion was quickly catching up to you. But the thought of another coffee made your stomach churn and your eyelids felt heavy like lead. So you gripped his hand tightly and laid your head against his arm.

If he woke up, you'd be there.

-

Sirius felt like he might be in heaven, the second his eyes fluttered open you were there. Your face pressed between his forearm and the bed, your hand tightly clutching his. He could feel the ghost of your lips on his skin and goosebumps threatened to crawl up his spine, his thoughts straying to your pout. Your closed eyes and your steady breathing made it clear you were sleeping, Sirius couldn't help but smile. He very rarely got to watch you like this, by some miracle he always fell asleep first and woke up second. You were so lovely, with your soft skin and the angelic glow from the light of the moon glaring against the curve of your face. If it wasn't for the stinging in his face or the way his ribs felt like they were collapsing in on themselves, Sirius would've sworn up and down he had died and gone to heaven.

He squeezed your hand, and the weight of the realization that you had been taking care of him fell on him. Guilt clawed at his throat, he had broken your heart and you still took care of him. He'll never forget the look on your face, the surprise, and the tears that threatened to fall. There was no other word to use besides heartbreak, and it had been his fault. He didn't know why he had brought her home, he didn't particularly fancy the girl, but the alcohol made his veins feel warm and she smiled at him and the impulsiveness and self-destruction within himself were a shoot-first ask-questions later duo that ruled his brain. He realized that you deserved more. More than him, more than the empty bed he left you with, or the avoidance of feelings. Sometimes Sirius wished you'd forget him. It would be better for you.

To forget his face, forget his name.

Your eyes began to pry open, and he couldn't help but spill his guts again. 

"For so long I hoped I'd fall asleep at the wheel and crash my motorbike on the ride home-" Your heart jumped to your throat, your head shooting up at the realization he was awake. His words were raspy and as much as he tried they were barely a whisper. "But then you came back from your apprenticeship, and moved right in front and it felt like-" he looked away now, his fingers fidgeting with yours. "Like you were that light at the end of the tunnel." Your hand was still pressed against his. 

"I stopped wanting to fall asleep on the bike, I just wanted to fall asleep with you"

"You are an idiot Sirius Black" The frustration gathered over the last two days flushed your system, tears threatening to fall over "you are so reckless and so utterly stupid-" tears flowed down your cheeks but you wouldn't let them fall, furiously wiping them away with your sleeve. He looked at you heartbroken. 

"I know love"

"No," you shook your head now and stood up, his hand falling back to the bed "You don't know, all I do is worry and care, and you don't!" your laugh came out crueler than you meant but it came out nonetheless "You never care Sirius- Oh and imagine when I don't see or hear from you for days, and suddenly you're dragged in here looking like you're seconds away from dying-" you paced around as you went on, your hands running through your hair in frustration.

"I didn't think you wanted to see me" he stared at you now, hoping to catch your gaze. Hoping to see if you meant it, hoping to see, something. Something that would tell him what he so desperately wanted to know. 

"I always want to see you" You locked eyes with his, his stupidly gorgeous stormy eyes. And he knew, from the pain in your eyes, from the way your pupils blew the second you looked at him, from the way you softened, anger dissipated when you looked at him. You didn't understand how anyone could look like that, how even scratched up he looked like he had been carved out of marble. "All I want is to see you," you were close enough for him to reach for your hand, even with pain shooting down his ribs, he did.

"I'm sorry,” you sat on the edge of his bed, closer than you had intended, as he spoke, looking at your intertwined hands. “and I’m sorry about the lass too-“

You scrunched up your nose, “I reckon that is none of my business” and he wondered how long you had to tell yourself that until you believed it.

”I sent her home, nothing happened-“

“you can go out with whoever you wish”

”I only want you” 

You looked at him again, into his eyes, into his soul. Hoping to catch a flicker of truth. His eyes looked at you with hope and want, and you knew. Sirius would never lie to you, he might be a drunk, and emotionally unavailable, and Merlin knows that he’s a mess, but Sirius Black was not a liar, especially to you. He squeezed your hands, pulling them close to his chest, pressing them against his heart.

”I’m so in love with you, you drive me mad,” he said this last part with a laugh, pulling a teary giggle out of you. You couldn’t help yourself, the wetness of your eyes and cheeks coming without you meaning it to. He swiped a thumb under your eyes, a nervous laugh threatening to spill from his lips, a watery smile forming instead.

“I am regrettably, in love with you as well” You smiled now, looking away from his scoff. His lips curled into a full-fledged smile now, as did yours.

“Am I that awful?”

”I fear so Mr Black,“ you glanced at him teasingly, the glint in your eye he loved so much returning. 

“I reckon you wouldn’t want to kiss a tosser like me then,” You couldn’t help but smile, as the both of you subconsciously leaned closer. His hands cupped your cheeks as your foreheads pressed together. “Can I—“

You didn’t let him finish, finally closing the distance between you. He kissed you shyly, a trait you didn’t know he possessed. You kiss him soft and open-mouthed, a small hum coming from his chest. His fingers hold on to your face, desperate to keep you close, and and you revel in the fact that his kiss turns hungry like he’d never get to kiss you again. 

You part with a small satisfied sigh, foreheads pressed against one another and eyes fluttered shut. Sirius thought about the many times he wondered what this would feel like, to press his lips against yours. He had dreamt of this for months; when you walked around your room in your underwear ranting or every time you opened the door, he dreamt of kissing you in the mornings and late at night.

Sirius realized, as he pressed another kiss to your lips, he had dreamt of kissing you for years.

[doppel-doodles]

A normal post a about Kevin Barnes from Poppy Playtime.

I genuinely feel so bad for Kevin…

Like that was a kid who clearly had a lot of issues from the start, instead of getting the help he needed all that happened was him being marked off as a „problem child“.

And then he was turned into a toy:/

Read more of my full thoughts and a sorta character analysis/ramblings below cut!

Like honestly no wonder he is seething if he wasn’t troubled before he definitely is now-

Obviously he has no trust in anyone, almost every adult he ever knew screwed him over in some way, hell even the kids he shares a body with would go against what he would do.

(Great example: When Doey chases us in his monster form, it's the arms of Matthew and Jack that are trying to keep his mouth from biting us, Kevin's are trying to grab for us.)

He was hurt over and over again, clearly he wasn’t aggressive just because he wanted to be but because this was his only way of making sure he wouldn’t get hurt.

It was how he had a semblance of control, a sense of protection.

But of course the irony is: That coping mechanism brought him more pain, it was what got him killed.

Sure, maybe he could've just "calmed down", but why would he? He was hurt again, he lost everything AGAIN.

All because he listened to their judgement over his own. Kevin could've killed the player and Poppy on sight, clearly his emotions easily overpowered the other two, but he didn't.

Instead he agreed to trust them as well.

He was still willing to do that, surely if he were just a mindless monster he wouldn't be.

And you know what? I believe he blames himself just as much if not more for what happened than he blames us and Poppy and projects it tenfold.

Because maybe, JUST MAYBE-

If he didn't allow himself to trust again, then everyone would still be alive.

But he did...now see what that got him?

In his mind he's proven right.

So what's an emotionally unstable child to do? After being hurt AGAIN?

That's right.

He lashes out at the first thing he sees that had something to do with his pain:

Us.

Is he in the right? Hell nah- bro we didn't mean for that to happen! But do you seriously think this kid is thinking rationally right now??? NO! He is seeing red right now, he is in fight mode! All emotions and must I reiterate that the only way he knows how to express them is through anger and violence?

There is NO reasoning with wrath try as you might! And that hurts because yeah maybe you could've dealt with that if he was still a gradeschooler but he isn't! He is 900 pounds of living dough with a thirst for blood!

It's either our life or his now. And we already know what the outcome of that is.

Honestly I think it's better that we only hear Matthew and Jack apologise for what happened, I do not think Kevin would even if he did feel bad for what he had done.

Because why would someone who has been scorned so many times be vulnerable all of the sudden? When his main character trait is biting at those who bark at him?Why would all that rage suddenly disappear? If anything the stress of dying only causes him to lash out more.

You don't need an apology from him to feel bad for him.

He is hurting anyone with two eyes can see that and for what it's worth, I do believe deep down he knew what he was doing was wrong but it was too late for him to see any other alternatives and even if he didn't and thought he was right for doing what he did it doesn't take away from the fact that he was fucked over by life.

Kevin is not the worst part of Doey, he is just a part of him.

And that part is not just a violent hunk of playdough.

It’s a scared, confused little boy that cared just as much about every toy in safe haven as his other two components did.

Because if he didn’t why would he get so angry about their death?

Anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk-

Also feel free to agree or disagree with my take, those are just my thoughts so let me hear yours, I like discussions:}

For those interested here are some Jack thoughts and Matthew!:D

And the big blue lump Doey

[muqingslover]

[ im back pookies and today I bring the LADS boys with alcohol! disclaimer: This is based purely on my opinion so don't get your panties in a twist. Or do. They're not my panties anyway ]

Sylus holds his alcohol the best out of everyone or anyone really. He will purposely challenge others to a contest knowing full well he will easily drink them under the table.

I believe he'd need some type of special liquor to actually get drunk because his body processes alcohol differently than humans and the usual is not enough.

Drunk Sylus is the most heartwarming thing you'll ever witness. He gets drowsy a few glasses in and sloppy enough that some of his dragon features will pop out. When the alcohol rushes to his head he turns into a mushy mess that wants to hold you like a teddy bear, softly purring against you all happy as long as you're in his arms.

Better pray that it's not summer because he gets soooo damn HOT when he's drunk it's like a very large oven.

As a result of the liquor he speaks a lot slower and quieter, but he sounds so gentle when telling you how much you mean to him, how much he's missed you while waiting all those years and confesses he's afraid you don't want him by your side anymore.

"Am I still your dragon?" His words are laced with apprehensiveness and his eyes resemble puppy dog ones when gazing down at you, hoping with all his might for anything besides a rejection.

+ Bonus: His hangover is only a mild headache when he wakes up and a bit of sluggishness during the day. He might not remember everything he said, but he knows he did say something based on how you act around him.

Rafayel is next. I think he used to drink periodically and actually does enjoy the taste of alcohol, specifically old and sweet wines, so he has a good tolerance built up. On the other hand, he holds back on ingesting heavy quantities nowadays because of how he is when drunk.

Walk with me bc in this blog I preach heavy angst for the fishie.

His tongue will get very loose once he is significantly inebriated, but most definitely not in a fun way— All the ugly feelings, frustrations and sorrows Rafayel keeps bottled up in his chest would come pouring out at once.

That might prompt some old grudges his heart still holds on to over the past the two of you share to come to light in a not so kind manner and cause all sorts of misunderstandings.

Rafayel will definitely regret his words in the morning and desperately try to apologize to you. Please sit down and actually talk.

+ Bonus: His hangover is more similar to "seasickness" than an actual hangover. He throws up even on an empty stomach and just lays on the floor of his bathroom because he has no energy to move at all.

Xavier is a similar case to our neighborhood dragon, but he fits more into a healthy middle category. I think he is rather neutral towards alcohol (not being particularly fond of it nor despising it altogether) and prefers when it's used as aromatic/enhancer for food instead.

He will usually have one glass, always on a full stomach, and then focus on stuffing his cheeks with food for the rest of the night since he claims it "dulls his senses".

H o w e v e r, when the booze hits him it hits him hard. Make sure you two are home because Xavier passes out right then and there and there's absolutely no waking that man up for the next three hours.

Another reason as to why I advise you to do this at home is because he WILL wake up exactly three hours later and the first thing he does is find and grab you regardless of where you are, what you're doing or who you are with.

This is Xavier's second phase of drunkenness: The hazy stage. He functions on impulses alone and all he wants to do is touch you, be it sexually if you're willing to indulge or simply holding you hostage for cuddling until his battery runs out again.

He won't really speak besides one syllable words answers if he reaaaally has to and communicates by acting on what he wants then looking at you for a reaction.

+Bonus: He has no hangover. At all. Man's as good as new the next day after a good nap.

Caleb is a weaker than the one before but still stronger than the next. This man is not a fan of alcohol in general, neither does he like if you drink, especially if done frequently. Not surprisingly the one preaching about how bad it is for your body is him.

If he did drink often though I believe he'd actually have a high tolerance so it's really just a matter of his body not being used to it. He's the type that takes longer to get buzzed but by the time he's one and a half glasses in it's game over.

PATHETIC MAN ALERT ‼️

His drunkenness has three stages:

We start off strong with his extroverted side receiving a big boost and suddenly he's the life of the party. He needs a literal leash because you blink and he's just gone ALNST reference!?. You'll find him outside doing the most random activity you can possibly imagine like finding something to show you (he might have stolen someone's dog without meaning to) or singing while laying down on the grass.

When you firmly tell him to stop and come along we hit pathetic dog stage. He is kneeling in front of your seat while holding you tightly by the waist, face buried into your lap as he asks you to not be mad at him because he hates fighting with you. Not even ten minutes later you'll feel your clothes getting damp from his tears because he feels dejected now that you're "all grown up and don't need him anymore" and how you apparently "hate him".

Finally, his unmatched self-control is the last one to go and, given the right opportunity, he will kiss you until both of you are out of breath and then pass out on top of you.

+Bonus: He does get a hangover, but only for the first few hours of the morning while his body is still waking up. For the rest of the day his muscles just feel really stiff and he's more irritable than usual.

Zayne is the biggest lightweight of all history and should have a sign around his neck that says "Do not give me alcohol". I believe he has a critical view on it— He knows it has both upsides and downsides so, unlike his bestie jk, he will tell you to drink with caution and follow the same advice though he leans more towards avoiding it completely for most the time.

While he will usually measure his words and only act after a certain amount of thought is given this man has absolutely zero control over himself when intoxicated.

He won't appear drunk at all, except for the flushed ears, until you talk to him and realize the filter between his brain and mouth is gone with the wind. You also need to keep Zayne far away from stores otherwise he will come back with six to eight different bags of sweets, plushies and some pet items because he's decided tonight is the night he gets a cat.

After chasing him, that was chasing a cat, around the neighborhood for an hour he will give up and looks so defeated while just sitting there it's both hilarious and endearing.

Please put him to bed and reassure him that all animals are not, in fact, plotting against him nor is he a "naturally bred cat repeller".

+Bonus: He has the biggest hangover known to man. The sound of his own voice makes him feel as if his head is being pounded like a church bell and the mortifying memories, oh yes he remembers every. single. thing, do not help him at all.

[mrsfudd]

give me tough love

warning: smut, toxic relationship, cursing, degrading, praise, spanking, choking, etc etc

sorry for typos lmao this is kinda ass lowk

After the Dallas wings lost against the Aces, anger was emulating off of Paige. She honestly played really well but for some reason was still pissed. It was only a preseason game but Paige took it to heart. You knew she was under a lot of pressure, she just moved to a new city, is on a new team and is trying to find her groove. It couldn’t be easy but if you being honest you seemed to provoke her more then bring her to peace. Tonight was a perfect example of that.

After the crowd died down, you got a perfect view of Paige. She looked like someone has genuinely wronged her. As your walking down to the court, Paiges eye meets yours. Her eyes seemed to go dark. She looked terrifying.

“You did great baby” You say reaching up to hug her. She doesn’t hug you back, just looks you up and down. Starting at your shoes, then your maybe a little too short skirt, up to your pretty sitting tits in a tank top then your face. “You okay?”

“Fine” She said clearly lying.

At first you didn’t want to add on but her attitude was just screaming to be reciprocated.

“Doesn’t seem like your fine” You say.

“Yea well maybe I would of been able to focus better if you weren’t dressed like a desperate slut.” Paige hissed.

“Alright bro, i’ll meet you in the car” You say laughing and walking away.

Paige didn’t say anything else, she didn’t have to. As you’re walking off the court you feel her eyes drilling a hole in the back of your head.

The car ride was damn near silent. It kinda scared you.

Once you and Paige get up to the hotel room, she wasted no time putting you in your place.

“Come here” Paige said still standing by the door.

“What Paige?” You say will your heels in hand.

“All fucking night when I looked up expecting to see my girlfriend you know what I saw” Paige said through her teeth.

“Hm?” You say not wanting to feed into her bs.

“Some fucking guy staring at your tits and ass all night” Paige said starting to raise her voice.

Oh shit you thought to yourself, you didn’t realize your outfit caused any unwanted attention. Paige is already always on you for the way you dress, tonight you proved her point even more.

“Paige I dont care about him, there no need to be jealous” You snicker.

“Take it off” Paige growled.

“Take what off” You say trying to get her closer to the edge.

“Everything” Paige snapped.

Lowkey scared for what was about to come, you listen. You start at your top, slowly pulling it over your head, not trying to mess up your hair. Then you shimmy your skirt down and they accidentally pull your panties down halfway, you continue to pull them down and step out of them. Once you get to your bra the look on Paiges face changes. All the compassion left her.

You take off your bra and toss it on the floor next to you. The cold air hits you and you start to get goosebumps. Paiges large warm hands start to roam your body, not enough to give you any pleasure but definitely enough to tell you that she was about to wreck you.

Without warning, Paige picked you up bridal style and carried you to the bed. She threw you down and started to take off her sweaty clothes. As shes pulling off her jersey, her eyes never leave yours, expression never changed.

Once she was down to her spot bra and shorts, she sits down on the bed.

“Come over here” She demanded.

You crawl over to her.

“Lay across my lap” She ordered.

You do as your told, laying on your stomach, ass in the air.

“You wanna act like a slut right” Paige asked.

“No I-” You say before your cut off with a harsh slap.

You wince at the pain and Paiges hand rubs the burning spot.

“Ima ask you again baby, you wanna act like a fucking slut right” Paige cursed.

“N-No Im no-” You barely let out as another slap gets planted. These weren’t kiddy little spanks, she was genuinely trying to hurt you.

“Baby, baby dont lie to me. Say it, say your a desperate whore” Paige said rubbing the spot where she hit you.

You don’t say anything.

Paige started to hit you one after one. Some lighter than others. Tears roll down your face as her big hands cover the surface of your ass. Paige noticed you started squirming and said “Say it and i’ll stop, come on I know you know how to be good”.

You swallow your ego and say “ Im a desperate slut” behind your tears but that wasn’t good enough for Paige. “Cant hear you baby” She chuckled.

“I-Im a slut, your slut” You say louder.

Paige smiled at your obedience. “Good girl baby, good job.” She said slipping two of her long fingers in your soaked hole.

Your breath hitched as you feel her immediately find your spot. Her paced started fast and never slowed down. You reach back trying to hold on to her for support but she slaps your arm away.

“Nah nah take this shit, this is want you wanted right?” She teases speeding up. Her other hand finds your ass and starts to spank you again, lighter but it still burns.

The mixed feeling of pleasure and pain is enough to bring you closer and closer to orgasm. Paige takes notice of how you start to grip against her fingers and pulls them out. You whine at the lost of contact and almost fall off the bed as Paige pushes you off her lap, standing up.

You sit up and pull your knees to your chest as Paige digs in her suitcase. She doesn’t turn back around to face you. Your eyes widen as you hear two filmier clicks.

“Lay down” Paige said walking towards the edge of the bed, you listen.

Paige grabs both of your ankles and pulls you closer to her, she rests your legs ontop of her shoulders. She doesn’t warm you up or try to tease you or anything. She slams her 7 inches into your aching pussy. Your back immediately arches off the bed. Paiges grip on your legs tightens as she starts to thrust into you.

Shes hitting every spot and she knows it. Paige is so deep in your stomach she grabs your hand and makes you feel where it is. Paiges aggressive pace never lets up not once as her one of her hands squeezes your chest.

Your letting out more screams then moans and more pleads for her to slow down then keep going. Paige doesn’t try shush you not once, she wants to her how she gets you knowing no one else could. She knew very well that she was stretching you out and was proud of it. It needed to be known that you were hers and this was her pussy.

Paiges hand lets go of your boob and makes its way up to your throat. Her large wraps around your neck and her head comes down, marking your chest.

Once shes done bruising you, she brings her head up and starts putting all her weight on your throat. Yours legs weaken and fall on her hips as she continues to fuck you. You had no clue where she has all this energy from but she had it and it was all for you.

As Paiges grip on your neck tightens, you grab her wrist trying to pry her off you. Paige knew you were getting closer to orgasm so she didn’t let up.

“Cum for me dirty girl” Paige said.

You repeatedly said her name which made her smile as your trying to push her off you but it made no difference as your orgasm came crashing down on you. It was everywhere. Paige finally pulled put, leaving you limp on the bed.

Paige goes into the bathroom and gets a damp rag with hot water on it. She starts to clean you and says “ I know you did that shit on purpose”.

“ and what if I did” You giggle.

“Never again baby” She smirks.

“Yea yea, we’ll see”. You joke.

Paige leans down and gives you much needed kiss. “ Love you….slut” She laughs.

“Oh shut up”.

[acphengene]

Little dove

₊ ⁺ pairing: Jake x afab!reader

₊ ⁺ genre: soulmate!au, sweet asf fluff and the tiniest bit of angst

₊ ⁺ wordcount: 3.2k

₊ ⁺ note: this can be read as a standalone but also as a part of my enhypen soulmate series. let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list

₊ ⁺ Jake ₊ ⁺ Jungwon ₊ ⁺ Jay ₊ ⁺ Sunoo ₊ ⁺ Heeseung ₊ ⁺ Niki ₊ ⁺ Sunghoon ₊ ⁺ Masterlist

When Jake woke up at his 13th birthday, he frantically searched his whole body for any type of physical mark. It was generally known that it was a little easier to find your other half when your mark literally could count down the seconds until you met them.

And right there on the inside of his bicep it said ‘bite your lip one more time’ in fine red letters. He had wondered just why his soulmate would want him to bite his lip, because in the eyes of a child that caused pain and nothing else.

His family had celebrated, and he had been nothing short of excited and hopeful that he would get to meet you sooner rather than later. But as most people he would have to wait.

When he traveled to Korea to live his dream, he hoped that it would bring him closer to you. And when the dream took him to a tv-program he hoped with every bone in his body that you’d be watching and cheering him on.

The tattoo, he made sure stayed hidden, he had no interest in people who weren’t you, saying those words to him.

When he and the guys had debuted, they shared their marks with one another, there was no reason not to, and he felt lucky that he didn’t have to hurt like Heeseung, somewhat jealous that Jay had known his soulmate since he got the mark. And despite him feeling bad for his platonic soulmate, he couldn’t help but be thankful that he wasn’t markless like Sunghoon

Engene loved theorizing when it came to them and their marks. There was no doubt in the fandom that Jake had a physical mark, also no doubt that it had to be somewhere on his arm. He had a habit of almost always grabbing on to his bicep whenever he was nervous.

They could however not agree on which mark it was, but he enjoyed seeing people’s theories on social media. He felt grateful that most of the fandom was so acceptable of it, not all groups were that lucky.

One afternoon he threw himself onto Niki’s bed once again scrolling on weverse to see what their sweet fans were up to.

“Dude seriously? With your outside clothes and everything?” The young man said as he looked at his hyung with judgement in his eyes.

He only rolled his eyes. “Do you think they’ve ever posted on weverse?”

Niki shrugged. “No idea, if I’m being honest I try not to think about it too much. In the end mine is definitely not close by”

“I hope mine is close” Jake said with a far away look in his eyes.

“Wouldn’t that be korean if that was the case?” Niki said as he pointed to the red words.

Jake looked at his arm and sighed. “Fuck, I didn’t think of that”

Niki laughed. “Obviously. But don’t worry too much okay? You’ll find them when it’s time”

“How’s the string?” Jake asked as a diversion.

Niki looked down at his left pinkie, where a red string was neatly tied with a little bow. He followed it out and through the window of the room. Where it’s stretched all the way to the horizon.

“Still tight as ever, wherever they are, they’re in no hurry to get closer” He shrugged. Niki had always had a very casual way of seeing the world, and once in a while Jake needed to be reminded to take it easy.

He was right after all, the Universe had given them a soulmate for a reason, and would pull you together when it deemed fit. But sometimes that could be a little hard to accept.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust that, it was more so that he was impatient, he wanted to get to know you, sooner rather than later.

As they traveled for their tours he frantically searched every face in every crowd hoping someone would draw his attention, that he would feel that pull and calmness people so often described.

In a new city, he found himself in a Prada store, looking at a new collection, as they all were picking things out.

“What do you think?” Jay said as he held up a bag.

“Pretty sure that’s a woman’s bag” Jake said with a chuckle.

As the fashionista Jay was, he only sighed. “First of all fashion is gender less, plus it’s not for me… it’s for her. I think she’ll like it”

Jake shook his head with a smile, as he tried to avoid that sting of jealousy he always felt whenever Jay talked about his other half. He knew it was most likely harder than he ever admitted. To know her, but to not have her would be torture in and of itself.

“Do you have this with gold hardware instead of silver?” Jay asked one of the sales assistants.

“We should have one in the back, give me a second and I’ll see if I can find it”

That. Voice.

It stopped Jake's entire world as he quickly turned towards you. And as he saw your eyes and that sweet and polite smile, it was as if the world stopped spinning, and everyone around him disappeared. For a second there was only you.

You went to the back to go and fetch the bag Jay had asked for, and for a second he almost followed you behind the counter.

He stood there as a puppy waiting for its owner, eyes locked on the door you had disappeared through. His fingers drummed on the glass as his heart beat frantically.

“Jake?” Sunghoon said as he tried to get his friends' attention. When he didn’t answer, he laid a hand on his shoulder, but his eyes never left that door.

“Not now” he whispered, and it almost sounded like he was in pain, and then you walked back through the door with the dust bag and set it almost right before him.

His breath hitched when you finally looked at him. He saw how your eyes widened, how your mouth fell open in almost chock. And for a second he thought: my first words can’t just be hey.

Instead he bit his lip nervously, he had always done it. Maybe it was because of the words you were to one day say to him, maybe it was just who he was. Your eyes fell to his mouth, and he saw the subtle twitch of the corner of your mouth.

“Bite your lip one more time…” you almost whispered the words, and as if you just realized what you said your hands flew up to cover your own mouth.

A gasp filled the room from both the guys, but also their bodyguards, and the whole room stilled.

“God I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to say that out loud”

Jake just smiled like a maniac, as he felt the tears prick in his eyes. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere” he said as he opened his arms for you to meet him if you wanted.

You threw yourself over the counter, not caring for the bag you had just put down, not caring for what your manager in the corner might think, not even caring for the horde of people with cameras outside the large boutique windows.

At that moment he had never felt happier. He chuckled as he pulled you as close to him as humanly possible, and the two of you stood like that until your heartbeats had calmed.

He didn’t want to let you go, so as he sat back down his hand reached out for yours and he smiled wider than he ever had when you took it and gave it a squeeze.

“You’re beautiful” he whispered and he saw you turn red almost instantly, he hoped his words would always have that effect on you.

“And you’re a romantic aren’t you?” You asked and he answered with a shrug.

You looked towards your manager who just gave you a smile and a little nod. As to say; “I understand, just go”

Jake held out his arm, and you quickly went around the counter to grab on to him. He pulled you close as the guards made sure to escort you out of the store safe and sound.

In the store behind the two of you stood Sunghoon with the biggest smile as he looked after the two of you. Sunoo was laughing in a corner as he kept repeating: did that just happen?

Jungwon smiled and said: “Finally, he was getting unbearable”

“So this is where I’m staying” Jake said as he opened the door to his hotel room. The two of you had decided it might be best for you to go there, there was no reason for you to dox yourself.

You looked around the room, but your eyes kept finding him, and every time they did his smile got wider, if that was even possible.

“C-can I see it?” you asked as you took a step closer to him. He nodded and got rid of his jacket before pulling up his sleeve, revealing the now golden words etched into his skin.

You laughed as you let your hand trace the words. Jake shuddered beneath your touch. “Oh I’m sorry, is it too much?” You stepped back to give him space, but he quickly grabbed your wrist, pulling you back to him.

“It’s nice, I’ve been wanting this, waiting for this for so long. My hitching breath and shuddering is in nothing if not from happiness and excitement for having finally found you”

The heat once again flushed to your cheeks, and he, that cheeky bastard, he bit his lips once again. You placed your hands on your face.

“I had an idea you might be a hopeless romantic” You said turning away from his gaze.

He laughed. “Why?”

“When you have ‘I’ve been looking for you everywhere’ etched into your skin from the ripe age of 13, you cant help but hope”

He felt how your words fucked on his heartstrings. “Tell me everything”

So you did; you told him how excited you were when you saw the words. How lucky your mother had told you that you would end up being because of the sweet nature of them. How your friends had fawned and been jealous.

“I know it’s not a given, and I know not all soulmates are made to be more than just platonic, but I would love to give this” you said, gesturing between the two of you. “Us a real shot”

Your cheeks were blazing hot, but you wanted to say them. In case he felt differently, you’d rather be disappointed sooner rather than later.

His hand snaked up and rested on the back of your neck, firm enough to make sure you knew he wanted you close, but still loose enough for you to get away from him if that was what you wanted.

He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against yours. “I want nothing more” as if he had done it always he rubbed his nose against yours, the gesture so soft and subtle it stole a whimper from your throat.

In that very instant his eyes shot open, pupils dilated, the love he had always felt for you on full display.

“Can I kiss you?” He whisperd. His lips so close to yours he almost did by saying your words.

Instead of answering him, you closed the small gap between the two of you. His other arm snaked around your waist as yours traced his shirt, up his stomache, over his shoulders and around his neck.

You pulled him as close to you as physically possible. And he smiled agains your lips at the way you responded to him.

A knock on the door pulled you from losing your minds, hearts and souls to one another.

“Yo, love birds… wanna grab some lunch? Get to know one another?” Heeseung said on the other side.

The two of you looked at each other and laughed. Jake only raises a brow, and you nodded as a response. You couldn’t wait to get to know him and those closest to him.

Once again he stretched out his arm for you to grab on to and you did without a doubt.

“Let’s go little dove” he said with a wink.

“Wait so I’m the first?” You said with a shocked expression.

Jake had his arm around your shoulder, it felt like his heart would physically break if he were to not touch you when you were so near.

“Yeah, hopefully the rest will come soon…” Jay said with a far away gaze in his eyes.

“You miss her?” You asked him.

“Every waking minute of every day” he answered with a small smile.

Nothing short of pure torture. You thought to yourself and leaned into Jake’s embrace. He kissed the top of your head instinctively.

“God the two of you is gonna be unbearable, aren’t you?” Niki said with a groan as he took another spoon full of the broth standing in front of him.

“Especially when we leave in two days” Jungwon said, trying not to sound to harsh.

The eyes you looked at him with broke his heart. He would have to leave you behind, go on on the tour. He would be in contact sure, but this would end up breaking him and in extension you.

It was common knowledge that the first few weeks, if not months were the hardest to be without your soulmate. It was as if your souls needed one another, after being separated for so long.

“The tour isn’t don’t yet, but I’ll be back as soon as possible. Okay? I promise” Jake said as he pulled you into another close embrace.

Jungwon stole the attention by spitting out his noodles. “Why would she think now is the perfect time for chocolate pudding. I swear it’s her hobby to ruin my meals” he pushed away the bowl, as the guys laughed.

You were thankful for the change in subject, but you couldn’t help but wonder just why the universe would set you up with someone whose job was to travel the world and leave you behind.

“Hey” Sunghoon said, “why dont you just ask if you can bring her along?”

Jake remained quiet as he thought it all through. It was not impossible, he knew that it was impossible to tear some soulmates apart, and Hybe had to accommodate that, but still… you had a life, a job and friends and family. He would hate to pull you from it all.

“Let’s talk about it when we’re alone, how does that sound?” You asked him with a little squeeze of his thigh. The mere sound of your voice calmed something inside of him, and his worried eyed softened.

“As Niki said, unbearable” Heeseung said right before he was snacked in the back of the neck by Sunoo.

“As if you’re gonna be any better than them”

He only shrugged.

“I don't wanna assume you have the possibility of just leaving” Jake said as he fiddled with his fingers. He did want you to come along. He wanted to sleep with you in his arms and wake up to your kisses.

“I don’t think that I do, sure I have a few weeks of vacation left, but it’s just so short notice” you said with a sad smile.

He nodded, “I know… what if I called Prada, or maybe if one of my bosses did?”

You smiled as you stood between his legs as he was sitting on the bed, you pulled lovingly on his long hair as he looked up at you with pleading puppy eyes. God he was beautiful.

Instead of answering you kissed his lips slowly, and his arms pulled you closer. “As much as I would love that, that wouldn’t be fair. Come back to me when you’re done, in the meantime we will just have to figure something out, okay?”

And figure something out you did. Every time you had the chance you were FaceTiming, you fell asleep talking about your childhood, and while he was training you caught up on the hours worth of content.

Hybe had been kind enough to leave you with a bodyguard of your own, but so far you hadn’t needed it. It had, however, calmed Jake’s mind a lot to know you were taken care of.

“When I can’t do it, I need someone else to, okay little dove?” That had been hard to argue with.

He had been gone for a few weeks now and it felt as if your heart had been ripped from your chest, as if you were no longer whole.

You hated every second of it, you hated your stubbornness. Why wouldn’t you take him up on the offer of just going with him? Integrity… fucking pathetic. You thought to yourself as you got the store ready before it opened.

You heard the door open, and as you turned to tell the early customer you weren’t open yet you froze.

“Sunghoon” you said before giving him a bow, you had spent the weeks reading up on Korean etiquette and culture.

He bowed back before he held out an arm just as Jake did. “Come, he’s unbearable and none of us can take it any longer… he needs you” he sent you a smile that never really reached his eyes.

Instead of bolting out the door you found yourself hesitating. You had a life and a job you had worked so hard for. Sunghoon rolled his eyes as he laughed. “Don’t worry about it, we’ve taken care of it”

And for once you chose not to second guess it, and grabbed his arm.

You knocked on the door to the room, despite what the two of you did most days, you had ignored his calls all day. Jungwon had warned you, he had been sulking and sad and as good as impossible to get to do anything. Even eat.

“Go away!” You heard his voice groan from the other side. You knocked again.

“Hee, I’ve told you all day I’m just not in the… mood” he swung the door open without even checking who was on the other side.

In your hand you had a bag of food, he would need something before the concert tonight.

“Surprise?” You said with a unsure smile, cause he only stared at you.

“You’re here?” He said as his voice cracked.

You nodded. “I’m here”

And as he heard your voice once again he broke down in the door to his room, you quickly gave the food to one of the managers in the hall as you joined him where he had collapsed.

He snaked his arms around you as he sobbed into your shoulder. And as painful as it was to see him like this you had also never felt more like yourself now that he was near.

He looked at you as he stroked your cheek. “You can’t leave me again, okay?” He said as he both laughed and sobbed at the same time.

You smiled at his words, as a single tear escaped your eye. He kissed it away as quickly as it had fallen. “I won't,” you whispered.

The two of you heard a groan further down the hall and saw Niki there. “Fucking unbearble love birds” he swore under his breath.

“Language young man!” You both yelled in unison, and a laugh quickly followed.

Neither of you minded being unbearable love birds, as long as you weren’t apart.

Hi! Thank you sm for Reading! Please remember to like and reblog, and let me know if you have any theories about the others or these two sweethearts. Feedback is very much appreciated 🫶🏼

[norristrii]

NIGHTS LIKE THIS.

“And It’s nights like this when I need your love.” — You wanted to rest, forget all of your problems, just to meet the biggest problem at party on Ibiza.

pairing. Lando Norris x Stella! fem! reader

warnings. situationship, reader is Andrea’s daughter (but it’s not important tho), alcohol use, drunk people, drunken kisess.

music. Nights Like This by The Kid LAROI

THERE WERE TWO REASONS WHY YOU WERE FAMOUS. First, you were the daughter of McLaren’s principal Andrea Stella, a name that carried significant weight in the racing world.

Second, you were in a situationship with McLaren’s golden boy, Lando Norris. The pretty daughter and the hot driver, always seen together, naturally caused a stir. The media loved to speculate about your relationship, and the fans couldn’t get enough of the gossip. But despite all the attention, you weren’t sure what you two had—it was definitely something, but what exactly?

You wish you knew.

You tried to convince yourself it was just a casual thing, that you were nothing more to Lando than a flirt or a fuck buddy. Yet, you couldn’t help but feel something more towards him. The way he looked at you, the inside jokes you shared, the late-night talks—all of it hinted at a deeper connection.

Despite your best efforts to keep your feelings in check, you found yourself falling for him. Every time he smiled at you, your heart skipped a beat. Every touch, every laugh, every moment spent together made it harder to pretend that it was just casual. The uncertainty of your relationship was both thrilling and terrifying, leaving you in a constant state of emotional flux.

Currently, you were on Ibiza with your friend group, on a vacation that had two goals: to make you forget your feelings for Lando and to just have fun.

You were in a club, colorful lights shining, confetti all around you, and some alcohol already in your blood. The music was loud, the bass thumping in your chest, and the energy of the crowd was infectious.

Your friends really made you forget everything, dancing with them and losing yourself in the moment. The worries and uncertainties about your relationship with Lando seemed to fade away, replaced by the thrill of the night.

You danced in the crowd, completely lost in the euphoria of the moment. The alcohol in your system blurred your senses, and it felt as if all the people around you had disappeared. The music was the only thing you could hear, its pulsing beat resonating in your bones.

As you moved through the crowd, you accidentally bumped into someone, snapping you out of your trance. You looked around, trying to spot your friends, but they were nowhere in sight. Panic started to set in as your heart raced, the realization that you had lost them in the crowd making you anxious.

Backing up closer to the stage, you felt someone’s body against yours again. You turned around to apologize, but your words got stuck in your throat as you looked into the very familiar green-blue eyes. “Oh my god,” you breathed out, realizing it was Lando.

Jesus Christ, why was he everywhere you went?

The shock and surprise of seeing Lando here, in the midst of the Ibiza crowd, left you speechless. His presence was both a comfort and a complication, stirring up emotions you had tried so hard to forget. The memories of your time together and the unresolved feelings flooded back, leaving you unsure of what to say or do.

As Lando’s gaze met yours, the music seemed to fade into the background. He scanned you, trying to figure out if he was hallucinating or if you were real.

“What are you doing here?” Lando asked with a smile, clearly happy to see you. You wished you could say the same, but his words were slurred slightly, indicating he had been drinking.

“I’m on vacation with my friends! What are you doing here?” you asked, still a bit angry and surprised at the coincidence.

“Same! You can finally meet my friends!” Lando exclaimed, putting his arm around you. The sudden physical contact and his enthusiasm took you off guard. “Lando, no,” you tried to protest, but you were already being led towards the stairs of the stage.

“Martin! Max!” Lando yelled his friends’ names as you went on the stage, his strong arm still around your shoulders. The lights were dazzling, and the music pulsed through the air, creating an electric atmosphere.

Martin stepped away from his DJ desk, his full attention on Lando. Max raised an eyebrow at you, a look of curiosity on his face. “This is my girlfriend Y/n,” Lando announced.

Girlfriend?

Girlfriend.

Your heart skipped two beats at the nickname. The word echoed in your mind, sending a rush of emotions through you. Was this what he truly felt, or was it just the alcohol talking?

“Nice to meet you, Y/n,” Martin smiled at you, his genuine warmth helping to ease some of your nerves. Max gave you a nod, his expression more reserved but still welcoming.

You looked around the club from the higher stage, trying to catch your breath. The vibrant lights and the sea of dancing people below created a surreal atmosphere. The music was loud, the bass thumping in your chest, and the energy of the crowd was infectious. Confetti floated through the air, adding to the festive chaos. The colors and sounds blended together, creating a sensory overload that made you feel alive.

Before you could fully process everything, Lando pulled you closer by your waist, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. The warmth of his body against yours was both comforting and electrifying. The music suddenly seemed louder than ever, the beat pulsing through your body as Lando swung you into the rhythm like a feather. His movements were smooth and confident, guiding you effortlessly through the dance.

At first, you felt a twinge of annoyance, but as you looked at Lando’s wide smile, you couldn’t resist. His joy was infectious, and you found yourself getting lost in the moment. The way he moved with you, the way he held you close, made you feel like you were the only two people in the world. The lights danced around you, casting colorful patterns on the floor and walls. The crowd seemed to fade away, and it was just you and Lando, caught up in the magic of the night.

His eyes sparkled with excitement, and you could see the genuine happiness in his expression. The connection between you was undeniable, and it made your heart race. The music, the lights, the energy of the club—it all seemed to fade into the background as you focused on Lando. The world around you disappeared, and it was just the two of you, lost in each other.

Then, without warning, he leaned in and kissed you. The world seemed to stop, the music fading into the background as his lips met yours. The kiss was electric, filled with all the unspoken emotions and tension that had been building between you. In that moment, everything else disappeared, and it was just the two of you, lost in each other. The kiss was a perfect blend of passion and tenderness, leaving you wanting more.

He was the first to pull away, leaving you breathless and wide-eyed. “I love you, Y/n,” he confessed, his voice clear and sincere. There was no hint of slurring, and you couldn't help but wonder if he truly meant it. “And I really want you to be with me,” he added, his gaze unwavering.

You hesitated, your mind racing. “You know my dad wouldn’t approve of that,” you lied, trying to create a barrier between you and the intensity of his words. In reality, your dad loved Lando and was thrilled to see how happy you were with him, even though he didn’t know the full extent of your relationship.

“Andrea loves me, you know that,” Lando said, raising an eyebrow at your lie. He saw through you, as always, with that perceptive gaze of his.

“Yeah, I know,” you admitted quietly, your voice barely audible over the thumping music. The truth was unavoidable, and you couldn’t deny the depth of your feelings any longer.

Before you could second-guess yourself, you reached out, grabbing him by his cheeks. The warmth of his skin against your hands was both comforting and electrifying. You pulled him closer, closing the distance between you, and kissed him again.

This time, the kiss was even more intense, fueled by all the emotions you had been holding back. The world around you seemed to blur, and it was just the two of you, lost in each other. The lights, the music, the crowd—all of it faded into the background as you surrendered to the moment.

Lando responded with equal passion, his arms wrapping around you, pulling you even closer. The connection between you was undeniable, and you could feel the weight of the unspoken words and unresolved feelings lifting. In that instant, nothing else mattered but the two of you, and the future seemed full of possibilities.

[theeroins]

If I say that I'm not used to people misinterpreting my favorite characters, I'd be lying. But the way they get so many things wrong about Inho's character is kinda pissing me off because you KNOW that most of them do it to cancel out the possibility of InHun being *something* more than what's shown so far. You don't ship them, that's fair, frankly I don't care. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion UNTIL your opinion is wrong.

Let's talk about a couple of things I've seen being talked about on tiktok (🙄)

“Inho joined the games because ilnam said that it'd basically be more fun to play than to watch so he followed his example." loud incorrect buzzer ! Inho has joined the games before, and not only that, he's also a previous winner, so therefore he's very much aware of what it's like to be a part of it, he's experienced them first hand, just like he's experienced the atrocities of it. they've changed him for the worst and possibly caused him a huge trauma —they're the reason he's lost faith in humanity after all— so, why would he crave to relive it just for the thrill of it? i, personally doubt he even enjoys watching the game.

“Inho didn't look at Gihun with love, he likes to watch him suffer” Short answer is no. He doesn't like to watch him suffer, neither he looked at him with love, not the pure kind of love at least. Two things can be true at once. Inho spent half the season staring at Gihun because everything about the man intrigued him; His determination, his stubbornness, his kindness, his hope, his heart that's full of love despite the pain he suffered, even the pain in his eyes every time someone got eliminated in front of him as if it was the first time it had happened, as if the cruelty of it all surprised him every damn time. How can someone, who's been through the same things Inho has been through, be the polar opposite of him?

now, the reason(s) that I think Inho actually joined the games for..

(yes I am an Inhun shipper, does that make my opinion a little biased? maybe. do i still believe I'm right? absofuckinglutely.)

Let me clarify this: Inho is NOT a good man, no matter the redemption arc he might get in s3, he'll continue to be a terrible person because nothing will ever erase the blood he's spilled and the evil men he's worked for. BUT at the same time, he's not ALL bad, not like the VIPS and ilnam. See, Inhun are the average "yin-yang" trope in fictional romance, (which I eat up every time and I find it very interesting when it's done the right way, don't get me wrong) Inho is bad but there's some goodness somewhere deep inside him. And the only person who's brought it to the surface is Gihun. Sure, he does think Gihun is naive, but he's also the only person who's actually challenged him, who's "forced" him to get his stupid head out of the dirt and look around him, even for a short while and Inho definitely liked what he saw. Honestly, it wasn't even that hard for Gihun to do so because the goodness in Inho wanted and waited for someone to pull him out of the dirt, he wished for someone, something to give him hope for humanity or.. anything. Anything that'll help him escape from his misery.

You can definitely argue that he joined the games to befriend Gihun, to gain his trust and stop his plans when the time comes, which is half true. But keep in mind that he needed to justify his choice to join the games. He's not a VIP nor the mastermind to simply get to do that without consequences. He's the frontman, the one who controls and manages everything. He's needed for the games to work and go by smoothly and successfully without unnecessary losses and problems. Gihun would only cause problems, Inho knew that very well and yet he chose to put him in it once again. He recklessly made that choice, risking pretty much everything because of his inner conflict. A part of him wanted Gihun to prove himself to him, that there's indeed good that'll save the world and the rest of him wanted to prove to Gihun that everything he so strongly believes in is merely a fantasy.

Joining the games and befriending Gihun was the only way for Inho to see the real him, without the heroic mask he puts on every time he faces the frontman. I think he believed that someone as extraordinary as Gihun will either break in front of him and he will end up disappointed by the human kind once again, or Gihun will change everything about the way he thinks for the better. But the problem is that Inho hopes for both of those things at the same time.

And that was Inho's arc in season 2. His inner conflict and how it will affect him, the game and Gihun later on.

[screamsofanoutlawbrain]

You know, the cookies of darkness is kinda like a cult. Cause most of them were taken in at their lowest of lows or had no other choice but to join. So here's what I think of em. (under the cut)

And I'll name most of em off.

Licorice Cookie: Dude was literally an outcast in every sense, it's assumed that his tribe literally fluffing DIED and that the magic he was good in (necromancy) is relatively frowned apon. He was an outcast, and likely starved of attention due to having no peers around him that he could really connect to beyond VERY surface level things, and Dark Enchantress probably took advantage on it, I could see him being given praise for his magic early on, but never getting any of that attention later. That very want for attention from one of the few who actually expressed any interest in his talents being the only reason he's still around.

Poison Mushroom Cookie: That's a child, probably an orphan, possibly alone because of their poisonous shroomies driving most away. Similar case to Licorice, the kiddo got attached to the ones around them and doesn't want to leave.

Red Velvet Cookie: He was born into this, came out the oven without an arm, and is (what I'm assuming) part cakehound, he was born an outcast, and likely has nowhere else to go. Red Velvet clearly cares about the cakehounds and soldiers more enough to keep him to stay. He has little other choice at this point.

Pomegranate Cookie: She was literally trained to be a high priestess to her village, and then learned that she was fated to effectively destroy it. I'm betting my right leg that she was probably DEVASTATED when she learned that, to learn that everything she has worked up to, she would betray. She trusted the mirrors vision over her own wants, and so she left to serve darkness, and (like Licorice Cookie) was given praise at what she done to her village, but that praise became less and less frequent over time. the combination of her having no other place to go, effectively destroying all allys she could have, the same starvation of praise, and her blind trust in Dark Enchantress Cookie leaving her unable to leave, not without a fight.

Dark Choco Cookie: I think this one was pretty simple. He was already pretty vulnerable and broken down on his own after losing everything to a sword he's stuck with. He got manipulated and brainwashed into thinking he had no other chance and that he was stuck forever. No lovebombing, no praise, just manipulation from somebody with a silver tongue. (His abandoning of the C.O.D. is something that could happen to any of the rest, but his already fragile connection made it a lot easier for him to break ties.)

Strawberry Crepe Cookie: A (possibly robot) child who thought they were abandoned by their kingdom(and which they sadly kinda were). They were alone with only robots to comfort them, do I even need to explain this?

Matcha Cookie: Like Red Velvet, but kinda worse. She was deemed a failure and had EVEN LESS TIME TO GROW OR DEVELOP BEFORE BEING THROWN INTO WORKING FOR THEM (At least, I'm guessing she didn't), plus she didn't have cakehounds to connect with, just her plants.

Butter Roll Cookie: Dude was kiddnapped. Need I say more?

Affogato Cookie: If he didn't join, he would probably be dead. Again, need I say more?

So far, I think this kinda matches up with a cult, but if anyone has a better definition for it, do tell in a reblog or comment.

That's about it, if any more of these guys come out, I'll update this.

[cressidagrey]

It's a Love Story - Chapter 11 (The End)

Summary:

Azriel's shadows find their master a wife.

Azriel would just really like his heart not to get broken again.

And Sky...well, she's just really surprised that that far too handsome male is interested in her at all.

Warning:

Rhys Bashing (as usual), I classified this as Azriel x OC, even when it't technically Azriel x Sellyn Drake (but we kinda know nothing about Sellyn Drake other than that she writes books so Sky is kinda an OC), Cassian is kinda a good guy for once, Azriel has a horrible time, as usual... Stuttering, toxic families (For once I do not mean the IC), Self-Esteem Issues, Secret Identity, Body Image Issues, Fat Shaming, People being utterly horrible. Racism against Illyrians/Lesser Faes?

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.

I could write more, but quite frankly, I think I would kinda drag it out and the first major arc is tied up with a neat little bow! There are definitely be threads left dangling for me to pick up whenever I want to write more about Sky and Azriel, but I think around 50k is a good place to stop for now ❤️

Even the Spymaster of the Night Court paid taxes.

That was the only reason why Rhysand even found out where exactly Azriel‘s home even was.

Azriel’s home was in the outskirts of Velaris, near the mountains. A little lake cabin. Rhys hadn’t even known that Azriel owned it but apparently he did.

Rhys shouldn’t go there. He knew that.

Rhys should be giving his brother space. That was probably the least he owed him. But he couldn't stop himself. He needed to know Azriel was alright. That he was happy.

Rhys needed to apologise. He needed to make amends…

And Azriel was ignoring him. Mental shields as shored up as they ever had been, shoving back at Rhys at every opportunity…

He had never seen Azriel's mental shields like this before, and it concerned him. He knew Azriel was angry at him, had ever right to be angry,  but Rhys hadn't expected his brother to shut him out so completely.

Reports were still arriving on his desk punctually as always. But Azriel seemed utterly uninterested in actually talking to Rhys. 

It was a small comfort, knowing that Azriel was still working, but Rhysand couldn’t shake off the feeling of guilt that had settled deep in his gut. He knew that he had hurt Azriel deeply, and he couldn’t blame his brother for shutting him out.

Rhys wished he could turn back time and fix things, but he had messed up terribly. He knew he had to give Azriel space, but the silence between them was deafening . It was a constant reminder of just how much damage he had caused.

As the days went on, Rhysand found himself consumed by thoughts of what he could have done…should have done… He tried reaching out to Azriel mentally, only to be rebuffed each time. 

Cassian showed up alone for debriefings and if Rhys showed up at the House of Wind for Valkyrie Training, Azriel was nowhere to be seen. 

So finally…Rhys had enough. So he showed up at that house. 

It was a nice house too, a secluded cabin at a mountain lake. Rhys knew that he wasn’t welcome, not after everything that had passed between them, but he had to see Azriel. 

Rhys raised a hand, knocking gently on the door. He could hear the faint sound of movement inside. Rhysand sighed. He should leave. He knew he should leave. But he couldn't bring himself to do it.

And then suddenly, to his surprise…the door opened. 

“…C…Can I….can I h…help you?“

She was brown haired and short… with deep blue eyes and freckles smattering over her nose.

Rhysand looked at the woman in front of him, taken aback by her appearance. He didn't know what he had expected, but it certainly wasn't a small, curvy, freckled brunette.

"I, uh..." Rhysand stammered, his mind blanking. "I was looking for Azriel." he finally brought out. 

The small female studied him carefully, her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Az…Azriel's n…not h…here," she stuttered.

Rhysand's heart sank, but he tried not to let it show. "Do you know where he is?" he asked, desperate for any information.

The female hesitated, biting her lip slightly. She seemed to be contemplating her answer, her brow furrowing in thought. After a moment, she finally looked back up at him, her expression unreadable. "He…He's...o…out f…for t…the d…day," she said finally, not giving him anymore than that.

Rhysand tried to keep the frustration out of his voice, but it was difficult. He was so close to his brother, and yet so far away. "Do you know when he'll be back?" he asked sharply.

She nearly flinched away from him at that tone of voice.

He opened his mouth to apologise, but he didn't even get to that. Because some thing with wickedly sharp claws, launched itself at his head with a hissing sound.

Rhysand yelped as the mysterious creature swiped at his face, growling all the while.

"HECTOR NO!" The female shrieked.

Rhysand stumbled backwards, trying to dodge the sharp claws.

Just at that moment, he felt more than he heard his brother's arrival.

Azriel materialized between them with a loud flapping of wings, his siphons blazing. He stood protectively in front of the small female, his expression murderous.

"Hector to me," he snapped. The thing, a cat ...an incredible ugly , murderous looking cat let off Rhys with another growl and slunk back to Azriel's side, heeling like a dog. The woman quickly scooped him up in her arms.

Cassian's laughter washed over him, at that moment, as Rhys was still laying on the ground, bested by a cat .

"Taking down by a cat now, Rhysie?" Cassian asked him with a snort, offering him his hand to gain his feet.

Rhys already knew that he was never going to live this down.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Azriel hissed, his voice filled with anger. His wings were spread wide, and Rhysand could see the barely contained ferocity beneath his brother's cold facade.

Rhysand winced at Azriel's harsh tone. He knew he had messed up, and he didn't blame his brother for being angry with him. "I just wanted to see you," he said, feeling small under Azriel's penetrating glare.

Azriel's expression didn't soften at his words. "You had no right," he said sharply. "You can't just show up here unannounced, Rhysand. This is my home, and you're not welcome here. You terrified Sky!"

Sky. Sky. That was the name of his brother's mate...of the pretty brunette that was standing behind him, fussing over her murderous cat.

Rhysand glanced over at Sky guiltily. "I...I'm sorry," he said to her. "I didn't mean to scare you."

Sky hesitated, before nodding stiffly. Her face remained guarded, her arms still wrapped protectively around the mangy cat. Rhysand couldn't help but notice how small she looked compared to Azriel's imposing form…and the absolute massive cat. 

"I am sorry," he turned to his brother, swallowing. The apology wasn't enough. he knew that. And it wasn't going to fix the fact that Azriel didn't trust him anymore or... *Az. Please.*

"How did you find this house?" Azriel demanded.

"I checked the tax reports," Rhys admitted with a grimace.

Azriel's expression darkened even further, and Rhys braced himself for a reprimand. Instead, his brother let out a harsh, bitter chuckle. "Of course you did," he said flatly. "Just can't stay out of my business, can you?"

Rhysand felt a pang in his chest at the hostility in Azriel's voice. He knew he deserved every ounce of resentment his brother felt, but it still hurt deep to hear it out loud. "I...I was worried about you," he said lamely.”I just needed to see you." he added. "To apologise."

"You don't even realise the lines you keep crossing, do you?" Cassian asked him flatly. "Ever thought about the fact that maybe you should have waited until Azriel was ready to hear you out?

Rhysand winced. Cassian's words struck a nerve, and he knew his friend was right. He had been rash and insensitive in coming here unannounced. "I...I wasn't thinking," he admitted softly.

Cassian shook his head, his expression still stern. "That's the problem, Rhys," he said bluntly. "You never seem to think these days. It's like you're so caught up in your own head that you don't consider how your actions affect those around you."

Rhysand's gaze dropped, shame washing over him. Cassian's words pierced straight through him, and he struggled to find a response. He knew he had been making mistakes, but hearing them laid out so bluntly still stung.

"What do you want?" Azriel asked him flatly. "Why did you come here?"

"I wanted to apologise," Rhys said weakly. "I...fucked up. I know that. I want to...fix things."

Azriel's face remained impassive, his eyes hard. "You can't just fix things with an apology, Rhys," He said curtly. "You crossed more than one line, and you shattered my trust. Do you really think saying sorry is enough?"

"Az," his mate said softly, her voice quiet. "H..He's blee..bleeding all over our front lawn after my cat at..attacked him. At least let him sit down and give him a healing salve…"

Azriel turned to look at his mate, his anger softening ever so slightly at the concern in her voice. He let out a heavy sigh, before nodding stiffly. "Fine," he said gruffly. "But no more than that."

Rhysand nodded gratefully, relieved that Azriel was willing to let him in, even if only slightly. "Thank you," he said quietly. "I...I really am sorry."

Azriel didn't respond, turning away from him and herded Sky and the murder cat into the house. Rhysand watched him go, feeling a pang of sadness. It was clear that his brother's anger was far from abated, and he knew it would take a lot more than just an apology to mend their fractured relationship.

"Come on," Cassian prodded him up.

The first thing that Rhys realised about the house Azriel shared with his mate was that it was absolutely stuffed full with books. The second was, that Azriel clearly doted on the Murder Cat that got a crystal dish with tuna on it put on the floor before Azriel even went in the direction of the healing salve, which he slapped down on the table in front of Rhysand. .

"I…I am so…sorry," Sky apologised to Rhys, bright blue eyes apologetic. "H…Hector has nev…never done anything like that before, I swear."

Yeah, somehow he doubted that. But he also doubted that it was going to help his relationship with Azriel if he was going to annoy his mate about her beastly cat. The thing had a worse personality than Amren . 

"Don't worry about it," he said, with what he hoped he was a gracious smile. "I think your cat and I just got off on the wrong foot." He looked over at the cat, who was now happily devouring the tuna as if it hadn't just tried to claw his face off.

"Good Boy, Hector," Azriel said warmly.

Rhysand could just stare.

Azriel, the feared Spymaster of the Night Court, was cooing at a mangy cat like a proud parent. He never would have believed it if he hadn't seen it with his own eyes.

"Who knew the Spymaster had a soft spot for cats," Rhysand remarked with a faint smile. Azriel shot him a warning glare, but the sternness was lost at the tender way he was petting the cat. "I am really sorry," Rhys apologised again.

"You said so. Numerous times," Azriel shot back.

Rhysand sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. He knew Azriel was still angry with him, but it was hard not to feel the guilt weighing down on him. "I know," he said softly. "But I want you to know that I mean it. I am sorry, Azriel. For everything."

Azriel's expression remained impassive, but Rhysand could see the flicker of sadness in his eyes. He knew his brother was struggling to forgive him, but he hoped that with time, Azriel would be able to find it in his heart to do so.

"I just want to make things right," Rhysand said earnestly. "I miss you, Az. I miss my brother."

"You'll need to decide one of those days," Azriel said sharply. "Am I your soldier or am I your brother?"

Rhysand flinched at the words, feeling the weight of the accusation hit him hard. 

He had always tried to balance his role as High Lord with his relationship with his brothers, but he knew that…that he hadn’t been fair to Azriel for a long time. "You're right," he conceded quietly. "I have been treating you like my soldier instead of my brother, and that's not fair to you."

"You have been treating him absolutely deplorably," Cassian cut him off.

Rhysand hung his head, feeling the weight of his mistakes settling heavy on his shoulders. "I know," he said quietly. "I've been so caught up in my own problems and responsibilities as High Lord that I lost sight of what really matters. And I've hurt Azriel because of it."

"And you stuck your nose in things that are none of your business," Cassian continued. "I get it that you are tired of fighting, Rhys, we all are, but you can't keep conflict out of our family by ordering Azriel to behave in the way you would like him to."

Rhysand winced, knowing Cassian was right. He had been trying to control things, to make sure everyone was safe and happy, but in the process, he had driven a wedge between himself and his brothers. "I...I know," he admitted reluctantly. "I was…I was stupid. I am tired of war. Of fighting. And I was just trying to protect him, but I went about it all wrong."

" Protect me?" Azriel asked him, his voice dripping with disdain. " Protect me from what ?"

Rhysand looked away, feeling the shame rise within him. He knew he had overstepped, and he knew that Azriel was angry with him. "The consequences that would have arisen," he said delicately. He didn't know what Azriel had told his mate...didn't know how much she knew, but she was watching him with an expression on his face, he couldn't quite place.

"Well, I am an adult, Rhysand," Azriel snapped. "I am perfectly capable of protecting myself."

Rhys knew that. He knew Azriel was more than capable of taking care of himself. But he still felt the need to protect him, to shield him from harm.

"I...I know that," Rhysand said quietly. "I just didn't want to see you get hurt." He glanced over at Azriel's mate, who was still watching him warily. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was being evaluated, judged for his mistakes.

Azriel let out a dry chuckle. "Well, it's a little late for that, don't you think?" he said bitterly. "You've seen to that already." Rhysand winced at the accusation, knowing that he deserved every ounce of Azriel's anger.

"I know," he said again, his voice barely above a whisper. "And I am sorry for that. I see now that it was the wrong way to go about it." He looked into his brother's dark eyes, pleading for understanding.

Azriel met his gaze, his expression softening ever so slightly. "Protecting me by making decisions for me is not protecting me, Rhysand," he said quietly. "It's...it's suffocating. It's demeaning."

Rhysand nodded, knowing that Azriel was right. He had been trying to control everything, trying to make sure that nothing went wrong, and he had lost sight of what was truly important. "I understand," he said quietly. "And I am sorry for making you feel that way. It was wrong of me."

Azriel studied him for a moment, before finally sighing. "Just...stop it," he said simply. "No more interfering in my personal life, no more giving me orders like I am one of your soldiers."

Rhysand let out a shaky breath, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. "I promise," he said earnestly. "I won't do it again, Az. I...I'll respect your boundaries, and I'll never overstep again."

Azriel snorted. “I’ll believe that when I see it,” he said gruffly. "And if you do...if you try to control me like that again, I swear Rhysand...it won't end well."

"You'll ha…have He…Hecctor to contend with," Sky said, her voice even.

Rhysand looked over at Hector, who had finished his tuna and was now licking his chops.  Rhys swallowed. "He does seem to be a force to be reckoned with," he said carefully.

Sky gave him a small, tight-lipped smile. "You could say t…that," she said, her tone neutral. Azriel snorted a laugh, shaking his head as he watched his mate. It was the first genuinely carefree sound Rhysand had heard from his brother…in a long time.

Despite the earlier tension, Rhysand found himself smiling too. There was something about the way Azriel looked at his mate, the way he looked...happy, that made Rhysand feel like maybe everything would be alright.

Hector chose that moment to let out a loud meow, his voice sounding like a rusty hinge in the otherwise quiet room. Azriel looked down at the cat, rolling his eyes. "Alright, alright, I'll get you your second helping, spoiled brat," he said, a hint of fondness in his voice.

Rhysand chuckled, feeling the tension that had been weighing him down lift just a little. Things between him and Azriel weren't repaired yet, they had a long way to go, but for the first time in a long while, he felt hopeful.

“They do say the pen is mi…mightier than a sword,” Sky said suddenly. “You treat Azriel like that again and you’ll see just how mighty my pen is.”

Rhysand's eyebrows shot up in surprise at Sky's unexpected threat. It was clear that she wasn't messing around, and Rhys couldn't help but admire her boldness. He glanced over at Azriel, who was trying to suppress a smile.

"I'll keep that in mind," Rhysand said, trying to hide his amusement. "Though I have to say, I can’t imagine a pen being as terrifying as Hector."

Cassian snorted. “Oh you have no idea,” he muttered

Rhysand's eyes widened in curiosity at Cassian's comment. What on earth did that mean? But before he could inquire further, Azriel's voice broke through.

"Don't worry about it," he said, a glint of amusement in his eyes. "Let's just say that you don't want to get on Sky's bad side, especially when she has her writing instruments within reach."

"Duly noted," Rhysand said, nodding seriously. He had a feeling that Azriel's mate was not someone to be trifled with, regardless of how harmless she looked, and he had no intention of finding out first-hand just how mighty her pen truly was.

Hector, having finished his second helping of tuna, let out a satisfied meow before padding over to Sky and rubbing against her leg. She reached down and scratched him behind the ears, smiling as he purred contentedly.

Rhysand watched the scene. He had never seen Azriel so relaxed, so happy, and it made him realize just how badly he had missed his brother. It was a reminder that family was more important than anything, and that he needed to cherish the people he cared about.

“Seems like you aren’t Sky’s favourite,” Cassian drawled.

Azriel snorted. “Nah, I come a distant third behind Hector and the shadows.”

Rhys watched with a swallow as these shadows that he had seen torturing people came over to Sky and twined around her hands. Azriel's words were said in jest, but Rhysand could hear the fondness in his voice. It was clear that Azriel adored his mate, and that the shadows had taken a liking to her as well. Rhysand tried not to let the slight sting of jealousy show on his face.

As he watched, the shadows danced around Sky's fingers, like they were alive and had a mind of their own. Rhys had seen the shadows in action, had seen how Azriel used them to fight and spy, but he had never seen them act this way before. There was a tenderness in the way they twined around Sky that was almost...beautiful.

Rhys turned to Azriel, who was watching his mate with a soft expression on his face. "They seem to like her," he commented, keeping his voice neutral.

"That's an understatement," Azriel said drily. "They're obsessed with her. They won't leave her alone."

Rhysand could see that clearly, but what surprised him more was how comfortable Sky seemed with them. She wasn't scared or even bothered by their presence...

It did make sense he supposed. The shadows were Azriel's weapon, his most trusted companions...that they would like his mate.

Rhysand watched as Sky looked up from where the shadows were wrapping around her fingers, a faint smile on her face. She seemed completely at ease with the strange entities, as if they were just another part of Azriel that she had accepted and embraced.

And it was also a sharp reminder of how much trust Rhys had destroyed through his actions. It was very clear who Azriel preferred, who he trusted more. Who he gravitated towards. Who even his shadows doted on, these strange, creatures that Rhys was quite sure would stop at nothing to keep their master safe.

The realization stung, but Rhys knew he had no one to blame but himself. He had caused this rift between them, he had pushed Azriel away, and now he was paying the price for it. But he was determined to make it right, no matter how long it took.

As he watched Azriel gently brush away a stray strand of hair from Sky's face, Rhys made a silent vow. He would do whatever it took to repair their broken bond, to regain Azriel's trust and respect. No matter how hard it was, no matter how long it took, he would make things right.

***

"You want to talk about it?" Sky asked him quietly, after Cassian ad Rhys had gone. 

She was fine now. Content. No more pulling at the mating bond so harshly and pushing all her fear at him. It had shaved at least a century of his life, to feel that from her when Casisan and him had been sparring and he knew that she was supposed to be safe at home.

He had expected near everything…but he hadn’t expected to arrive to the view of Hector scratching Rhys’s face with all his might. 

Azriel took a deep breath, feeling the weight of the day's events bearing down on him. He wasn't sure if he was ready to put his tangled emotions into words yet, but he also knew that he couldn't keep it all bottled up inside.

"Rhys gave me some orders that I didn't agree with," he said drily. "Stuck his nose in things that he had no business to interfere with. He treated me...treated me like my feelings didn't matter. That I didn't matter....It took a really bad fight on Solstice for this apology to occur," he said with a grimace.

"You don't think he means it?" Sky asked him curiously, turning to look at him.

"No, he does mean it," Azriel said with a sigh. He did believe that. “He wants to fix things. to rebuild trust...And I do want that too. Regardless of how much of an asshole he can be on occasion he is still my brother ."

Sky was quiet for a long moment, watching him intently. Azriel felt the weight of her gaze, knowing that she was analyzing the situation, trying to understand what he was feeling. Finally, she spoke.

"You're worried that he'll disappoint you again," she said softly. "That he'll make promises that he can't keep. That he'll go back on his word and hurt you worse than before."

Azriel's throat felt tight. The words hit him hard, because Sky had put a voice to his deepest fears. "Yes," he admitted. "That'sexactly what I'm afraid of. I want to believe him, I do."

But it was hard to trust Rhys right ow. Especially with Sky. Trusting Rhys with the most important, the most precious part of his life...

"I can loan you Hector whenever he pisses you off again," Sky offered him seriously, and Azriel couldn't help but laugh.

"Thanks," he said with a small smile. "I might just take you up on that." He pulled her closer, burying his face in her hair. The scent of caramel and hazelnuts enveloped him, calming his racing thoughts and easing the tension in his shoulders.

"I love you, he whispered into her skin and she hummed. "Regardless of what happens, you  have me," Sky promised him. "I'll be behind you, every step of the way. regardless of whatever you decide."

Those words were like a balm to Azriel's soul. The fear and doubt that had been plaguing him since Rhysand's unexpected visit receded, replaced by a sense of safety and certainty. He held onto Sky tightly.

"I love you too," she murmured, the words barely audible even in the still apartment.

They stayed like that for a long moment, simply holding onto each other.

*I don't think I ever thanked you.* he told the shadows softly as he held his mate in his arms.

The shadows fluttered around him, wrapping around his arms and shoulders like a comforting embrace. They didn't say anything, but Azriel could feel their response. They had been with him through thick and thin, protecting him, guiding him, and never once asking for a word of thanks. And yet, he knew that they understood his gratitude, that they could feel it…

*Thank you for finding her.*

[pomefioredove]

hi!! could you pls do headcanons for the housewardens (+jamil) with a reader that stims? like if they get nervous or excited they do flappy hands! Gn reader, and the characters are crushing on reader but they’re not dating yet please! Thank you :>

:) of course! I stim so I get it LOL

summary: reader who stims! type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, jamil, kalim, vil, idia, malleus additional info: romantic or platonic for most, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu

Riddle already has a high "nonsense tolerance" when it comes to you

if you were anyone else, he would get overstimulated so fast

but, it's you

and he likes you

and he puts a lot more effort into making you comfortable around him than he would ever admit

so, by all means! fidget, stim, hum, he likes all of you

and if anyone else has a problem with it, they can go through him, first

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

if you can live with a little teasing, Leona can live with your stims

kidding

...kind of

he would never admit it to himself, but the way you get excited is kinda endearing to him

(major cuteness aggression)

so he just can't help teasing you a tiny bit for it

lovingly, of course

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Azul has an eye for detail and a love of figuring people out

and admiring observing you is one of his favorite pastimes!

he might need the information later

for... reasons.

he finds your mannerisms... interesting. your nervous ticks are so different from the other student's

then Floyd suggests you're obviously stimming; it just looks different "'cause you're on land and stuff,"

it makes sense (though he doesn't have to be so smug about it)

mystery solved

but Azul keeps staring at you, anyway. for... reasons.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

unsurprisingly, Kalim loves it

if he doesn't stim already, he might just start

it's a good way to let off some energy when he's overexcited, or calm him when he's nervous

(which happens more often than you'd think)

he would be baffled by the idea that people find it annoying

or weird, or childish

if he felt like someone was staring, or about to say something to you, he'd start stimming with you

power in numbers, right?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

surprisingly (or unsurprisingly?) Jamil doesn't really... care

at this point, he's dealt with everything

a nuclear bomb could go off and he probably wouldn't even react

that's a slow tuesday for him

it's only during the metaphorical nuclear fallout

(when he has that migraine he always gets)

that he'll ask you for quiet and space

and that's the very most he'll say about it

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Vil isn't ignorant

he's not going to punish you for something that you find helpful

...and Rook has his little quirks, too

besides, there's nothing you could do that he wouldn't find endearing

what he will do, however, is help you manage

to your comfort, of course

there's a drawer full of stim toys in the Pomefiore lounge probably

and if not, Rook probably has a doohickey or two that can keep your hands occupied during quiet/important/etc occasions

otherwise, you're free to do whatever

I'm gonna be so real tbh I see Pomefiore as a very disability-friendly dorm and I'll die on that hill

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Idia! the freak himself

(affectionate)

nah, he doesn't care

he probably has a ton of his own stims he's already super embarrassed about

so he's definitely not going to say anything to you

if anything, it makes him feel better about himself

it's cute when you do it

he starts 3D printing you toys he think you'll like, most that he designed himself

so, he does care, but... in a good way!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

LMAO okay. wait

between Lilia, Silver, and Sebek, there's no way Malleus would see stimming as anything but normal

Lilia probably starts crawling on the walls like a spider when he's excited

so hand-flapping is like aw... cute! :) to Malleus

he would, will, and has stared down anyone who makes a face or a nasty comment about it

so you can be sure that no one will ever say anything mean to you about it!

like, ever again