#i wanna bite her sometimes :/
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Maeve 🥰
#and keith#but i woke up thinking of her#her birthday is around the corner#not sure i'll be able to do something tho#which is okay#she's just 🥰💖����🥹#i wanna bite her sometimes#good morning!
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godddd the lalondes drive me insane. roxy in candy vs meat makes me feel like im in the 5th ring of hell (/very pos). thinking about the toxic, manufactured, 'inherent bonds' between women (trans + cis) and people dfab that hinders so much, including self-discovery by way of transness. sapphics especially get hit with this hard. the urge to copy and the fear of becoming your mother in tandem. youre part of The Cisterhood whether you like it or not, whether you are actually a girl or not. what you actually do or want doesnt matter because The Game and Fate dictates that you are just a girl, so you're going to be 'treated like one'. youre playing by The Game's rules. the other crabs will never let you go and you're sooo selfish for thinking you can develop or explore yourself outside of the crab pot. dont you like it in here? isnt it fun though? you dont present right for your old crush to notice you so curl your eyelashes tighter and put on more lipstick, its the only way he'll notice you. he's not a homosexual, you better not wear that hoodie. of course no one would like you for yourself, you already tried that. you desperately want to be like your mother but your mother despises you as your daughter. she can't even LOOK at you. you are your own mother
#our t#if its not obvious i like agender rose too LMAO#i wanna talk more about the degrees of toxic hegemonic femininity and how its perpetuated by misogyny#and not only the abusive male characters (doc scratch and LE/caliborn) but also perpetuated and self-perpetuated#by the girls and women too. takes two to tango but this tango is squared imo#having a gender isnt miserable but Being Gendered *is*#both caliborn and calliope have warped as fuck ideas of binary gender and that DOES affect the characters in tandem#you can see this in meteorstuck w/ rose comp-feminizing herself to 'try to understand her mother more'#like roooose wtf was thaaaaat. and roxy comp-cising themselves for john in candy when theyre dating#moving to femininity isnt always a total liberation/escape from toxic gendering nor is it safe for everyone physically/psychologically#or in hs fanon terms just. trying to shed urself of any and all instances of mascness (even queer mascness) in general :|#which doesnt make sense. thats half a gender theory and like a fourth of an analysis. ur MISSING OUUUT!!!#sometimes you really are just taking a bite from the other side of the same poisoned apple#theres a healthy balance for everyone is what im trying to say and u can see that in hs
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@raubtierc wanted a lil tension ( and got fluff? )!
rigid arms that originally crushed her against min-jun's chest have long since relaxed, but chiyo has yet to pull away. she doesn't want to. she never wants to after a vision like that, hazy and violent and terrifying ( oh, what is she capable of? what could she be capable of? ). maybe it's childish to hide in his warmth. maybe it's selfish. he doesn't deserve to be mixed up in the trouble following her, doesn't deserve her weight upon his shoulders when he has his own. and yet...
brown eyes slowly blink open, and still chiyo remains right where she is. " thank you. " how softly her voice breaks the silence between them. she shifts in min-jun's embrace, listening to the steady beating of his heart as her arms encircle his waist and squeeze. softer still she tells him, " i hate getting like that in front of you. "
#raubtierc#i feel like there's tension potential here but it's also just :' ) something soft for these two :' ))#my mind went to the plot we're discussing for them so i just ran with that this time bc man i love hurt and comfort hehe#also chiyo's ' he doesn't deserve my trouble :( ' but she'd do the same for min-jun in a heartbeat!! maybe has atp!!#i wanna bite her sometimes :/#i had to be there to be loved | interactions#black magic woman | golden peaks
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It's all compassion, grace, kindness, understanding, empathy, love until God blesses me once again with devout rage.
Waking up in a good mood and it all goes away very quickly is crazy.
#I need to take my medication more often#I wish I could extend my jaw like a snake to bite people heads off#I hate some people sometimes#I just cry and scream when I mad#I feel like a helpless child again#Oh christ so help me please#Literally it's all motivation to extend my god complex and be better than everyone.#maybe it's unhealthy but I don't mind anymore#I hate being sick in the head#Save me#Avoiding talking to my bff cause I don't wanna be mad at her cause she actually did nothing#marilynisms#im just a girl#girlblogger#girlhood#hell is a teenage girl#girlblogging#coquette girl#gaslight gatekeep girlblog#girl rotting#girl problems#just girly things#borderline rage
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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I'm sorry for my posts today, I guess the stress from the entirety of September was piled too high and is collapsing onto my head. I'm just so tired y'all....
#the dentist office in town offers walk ins so i COULD go tomorrow but two peoblems#i cant afford to do a payment plan. after sending rent and bills im left with barely enough for any groceries needed.#i can get maybe 5 things if im lucky#also im scared. im scared to go alone. its too short notice to ask my friend to pick me up and take me. i cant do that to him.#so do i just wait until i can afford the 120$ insurance plan and risk the infection getting worse or spreading#or do i go and risk not beinf able to pay the bill and get into yet another debt#i dont think i even wanna do this for me#all i can rhink about is my niece and how is she supposed to have a good like when im the only one with decent credit#thst could get a house with a yard and her own room#whos gonna be the one to take care mom amd dad if i bite it yknow? because thats my biggest responsibility#taking care of two disabled adults bc one cant works bc hes legally blind and the other cant get approval to work from her heart dr#their ssi could decrease or lower at any point in time as demonstrated multiple times this year alone#so yeah im only doing the right thing and at least TRYING to see a dentist for their benefit and not mine#my benefit is i continue to live with slightly healither teeth? no because id rather let myself deteriorate into nothing#but i dont the choice because i have people depending on me financially and i cant fail because if i fail things worse for them#and if things get worse for them its just another one of my fuck ups#sometimes i wish i just burned in the house fire in 2008#talkies#vent
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I'm a dog that would be better off put down
I bark too loud
When I lash out I don't just bite, I maul
I yank at my leash
But at the same time
I just want someone to look at me
And call me a good dog
#original sin#she calls me good dog#... im goin thru it#ive got one person who calls me good dog#bunny calls me good dog even tho ive bitten her before#not as bad as ive done to some people but bitten all the same#she told me she still loves a pet who bites and scratches sometimes#and that her favorite parts of me are the squishy bits covered in tar#i dont know why theyre her favorite but they are#the bout of vulnerability i went through earlier made me wanna fucking vomit#but she still called me a good dog
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...Can we tell apart my eight muses with the same FC?
#[rain & her clones aren't muses here but idc]#{i'm basically holding my future emmy right now} about terri#{it's like my mother always used to say...} about tiff#{tú quieres creer que estoy loca} about salgado#{umbrella had to have me} about j.d.#{you already know my name huh?} about bruce#{hey get a load of this} about alf#{yeah i get that a lot} about luther#{if you want an adrenaline rush...} about letty#{this is serious} about vance#{wanna see a magic trick?} about joey#{so i guess i'll tell you my story} about m-13#{i got tired of waiting so i started a little fight} about inéz#{chucky did it} about nica#{sometimes i want the first bite y'know?} about cass#{i was trained in battle by a great warrior} about katarin#{if you don't try to save one life you'll never save any} about angie#{guess you could say i'm one of those people who's just better off alone} about ana#{there's nothing to it} about jill
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Hi hello due to popular demand (3 of my mutuals expressed they wanted me to) i will now be posting my art on main (and probably reblogging it onto my art blog @xx-morel-xx for archiving purposes) anyway yes i do in fact draw these are the silly little guys i keep talking about - Alec and Ondra! Ondra is a vampire who got turned in 18th century Austria-Hungary - he was not a fan of being turned. Alec's parents (or maybe grandparents havent figured that one out yet) escaped communist Czechoslovakia to the US, he comes back for university and gets his idiot emo ass accidenteally turned by Ondra while wandering a cemetery at night. They proceed to go on the run so the vampire government doesnt force Alec to murder his entire family
#oh yeah also Dana im so sorry i noticed you tagged me in that writing thing i wanted to tell u it is not in fact a writing project#but i forgot#they just exist in my head and sometimes pictures. sorry#my art#<- block that tag if you dont wanna see my silly little drawimngs#dreams of biting#<- thats the working title for their story and the tag ill probably use from now on#cuz befor i just used 'alec & ondra' but Bela is in their universe too i wanna include her more#its. from the attic demos title 'dreams of stabbing and being stabbed' yk. mcr.#ive tried to think of a more original title but have so far been unsuccesful lol
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neurotypical people don’t understand the importance of floor time, like sure i could lay in the empty bed but the floor beckons me and who am i to ignore it’s call?
#whimsy whispers#the floor is comfy okay#I use to sleep in the floor because I wanted to as a child#I had a bed#but sometimes you see a spot on the floor and go ‘is anybody gonna lay there?’ and not wait for an answer#anyways I laid on my roommates mawmaw’s floor today and people very kindly told me I could lay in bed to which I was like ‘nah I’m good down#here’#I like the floor#I was also very tired and had a headache and wanted to pester try Alexia which I could not do in another room#I fought her over a bottle of sprite#I only ‘won’ because she eventually gave up#I didn’t even wanna drink her sprite I just wanted to pry it from her grip and we were just tangled both trying to yank it out of one#another’s hands#full disclosure: this would’ve gone on forever if she didn’t just give in because like I am not very strong#twas fun#at least once a week I need to physically mutually attack someone or else#the other week kane and I attacked each other in the kitchen I can’t even remember why#oh yeah I put my soapy hand on their arm and then did something back to me and it resulted in me being bear hug attacked from behind while I#tried so very hard to bite them
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found out that rascal's owner took him again while i was out, and he's probably not gonna be back since the semester's almost over. i don't even know if his owner's coming back next semester, if i'll ever see him again. if he'll ever see me again. why do they wait until im not around to do this? why do they never let me say goodbye to him?
#i didnt really get to process it bc i found out when i was hanging w a friend but. im processing it now#sigh.. i dont know. i dont know.#at the end of the day he is and has always been someone else's cat. i can't control what she does with him#no matter what i think of it. she can always take him away. but every time it happens im just. im tired yknow?#it's worth it to me to have him around. i love him dearly and i want him to be in a home where he's actually cared for (which i have done my#best to provide) but he's just. not mine. and every time it happens i back up and think man. im such a sucker.#i don't think people manipulate me often. not in an ongoing way i mean. i don't think ppl see me as valuable enough to most of the time.#but damn. she really found my weak spots didn't she. free petcare courtesy of one chump who can't live without animals around. sigh#he deserves stability but he deserves love more. this weird shared custody thing is better for him i think. and frankly i also love him.#im not the priority here but my feelings are like. there. him being taken away without even telling me first hurts. i'd like to be able to#say goodbye to him. im not saying he has to stay or this has to go on but couldn't they just.. consider my feelings a bit more?#just bc you're fine with dropping your cat off somewhere for weeks not knowing when you'll see him again and not visiting doesn't mean i am#and i kind of feel like my roommate is part of this. after all it's not like his owner can just break into our room and take him#and if im always out when they do it there's a chance roomie's just shipping him off whenever she gets sick of him.#she's done it before. even after she agreed so vehemently with me about never wanting him to go back to such treatment and stuff early on.#she's been spraying him for little reason lately too. and i mean i get being a little more cautious with some things bc her neck's broken#but she's really fixated on how much he smells and bites and stuff and talks about how if i wasn't around she'd consider eating him#and then other times she's like that's my pookie. i don't get it. like yeah i tell rascal to fuck off sometimes bc he hurts me but it's not#like a hateful thing. i dont resent him for it i'm just annoyed sometimes bc he's maiming me a little. he's my baby. how could i loathe him?#so it makes me think that roomie might be blaming his transfers on his owner bc she doesn't want me to judge her#and like. this is her room too. it's not her fault she's more bothered by the smell than me. if she doesn't want to be bitten and clawed all#the time i can sympathize. i don't wanna force her to house him. but i wish she'd just be honest with me i guess#like. what if his owner decides to give him away without telling me? i'd take him in in a heartbeat. even though i know it's a bad idea.#but i'm worried he'll fall out of my reach completely. and at the very least I'd like to be able to say goodbye first. that's all.
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(hi I’m just gonna finish what I wanna say here cause the tags are getting excessive and people can only handle so many reblogs of moots gagging)
I won’t get burnt out! I’m perfectly content right now just really hyper fixated on pretender. Also he is still taller then Ozzy without heels by like half and inch. It still counts for something.
low-key wanna continue this comic but I have no idea how he’s canonically react to being kissed. Flustered yes but who isn’t? Anyway that’s it for my ramble I just finished making a quiz for a whole new fandom so. Yippieeee!
thanks spot for making Pretender and N! They’re the silliest AU’s I’ve come across. (And the most smooch able.)
Heya!! (And yeah, good call! I forgot that Asks exist lol-)
And nice! Glad ta hear you'll be good lol, I always just like to check in on folks ^^. And NICE! Tall Pretender from comic holds strong then! (Plus who knows, Pretender does shape-shift so he could totally just... change height to mess w/ ppl or tease hehe)
And Ooh!! I'd love to see where you could go with it! If ur looking for a potential reaction I might have a few? (Adding them... now: 1) Pretender kinda like, melts a lil. When he's emotional he kinda loses his shape and sinks into that purple mist, so I could totally see him just kinda getting flustered and literally deflating for a sec before popping back up with a stuttered little surprised response. 2) He's definitely Blushing, but doesn't like, react very obviously. More of a, "Well, that's a first!" Followed by a cheeky, "Usually I try to eat a human's face, not the other way around.... Not that I'm complaining!" Or something with a stupid lil grin and a wink, before he continues conversation. 3) "You sure know how to greet a new pal!" As he kinda squints at them and goes, "So, do I get a name to match the kiss?" Looking flustered for sure, but low-key smug as he jokes to cover his loss of composure. These would just depend on how competent u think he'd be in the face of a Random Wonderful Smooch hehe...) And those are just loose ideas? I'm actually not sure how he'd react to romance yet, if only because I haven't written him in that situation often enough yet hehe! U got him p spot on tho, so take any or none of these as guidance if you want! (And if not this was still a fun chance to write him some dialogue lol---)
And You're so welcome!!! Thank you for enjoying them so much!!! I pride myself on the Silly since my Serious sticks to writing, so I'm glad ya like em! (And wanna smooch em too! The rizz was built-in I suppose lol---)
#moot shenanigans#frfr Asking was so smart thank u for that-#AND do u have any particular nickname you'd like me to refer to u by? sometimes folks have one but I don't wanna just keep calling u “YOU”🫵#hehe.... I don't like to assume#but if not that's cool too! just double-checking!#oh!!! and I wanna add this:#I'm so grateful that folks are enjoying my dopple boy because I made him w/o expecting to draw him too often. just an old au idea from year#back. but then Ood and u and Four and others looked at him and interacted and Idk it warms my lil soul lol!!!#o- and N is my persona/self-insert/au and I've had her for years so I'm honored u think they're silly 😌🫡#that's all!!! sorry for the rambles!!! have a lovely day!!!#<- I say as though I'm not still gonna respond lmao--#edit: ur also free to dm me if u ever wanna chat more! i swear (unlike Tender) I don't bite lol!
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forgive me if chiyo plays it safe with some of your muses :' ) tbh i'm just rolling with whatever scenario pops into my head so that y'all don't get very similar soft moments with her!
#i do wanna write kisses but if chiyo says nah we're holding hands or hugging i think that's still pretty gosh darn cute uvu#and ngl she'd straight up bully some of y'all's muses first but i'm trying to keep it soft and mushy like i advertised ASDFG#chiyo squishing faces or giving them a hard time before she gives them affection?? yeah sometimes if she's feeling spicy <3#or if they annoy her :' )#she'd bite just as fast as she'd kiss in some scenarios and we love to see it hehe#get ready to ramble | ooc
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feeling very grgrgrgrgrgr tonight I wanna participate in another zine so so badly they’re so fun
#carissa speaks#souyo zine was one of the best projects I’ve ever done and I want her vibes BACK!!#sometimes I entertain the idea of organizing my own zine but I have no idea how the physical production side of it would work#and like yea it could be a digital only zine but I am a silly lil guy who wants silly lil merch items#idk I just wanna draw more blorbos and have them be in a lil book the vibes of that are truly unmatched#if anyone actually sees this and knows of any persona zines that have interest checks/contributor apps open Let Me Know#i am simply biting#truly chomping at the bit to do more art#also speaking of art#i have a p5 shuake animatic in the works which I’m very very very excited about#so keep ur eyes peeled for her Eventually if ur someone who’s On the Lookout for more art of mine ig#i also have a shit ton of doodles I can post actually might do that soon
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wagh.
#i never really like. had the typical feminine teenage girl phase my mom expected#ive always worn hoodies and sweaters and barely done anything with my hair and used 0 make up#and now i want to start wearing make up and jewelry and pretty outfits and do my hair cool and start to be more feminine#and i thinks its anxiety + my mom thats gonna put such a damper on that shit#once my brother learns how to drive im so gonna make him drive me places so i can actually buy my own clothes#without having to have every single item aproved by my mom#bc im so tired of that shit man#i wanna be able to dress how i want to. yknow.#cause i feel like 11 year old me still in her 'tomboy i hate pink' mood decided on a style of clothes#and now my mom is never letting that go#i wanna wear glittery eyeshadow and learn how to do eyeliner and wear pretty tops and who cares if theyshow a lil belly when i raise my arm#screaming. i wanna be able to actually express myself and my gender and my identity#i feel like ive been trapped in my middle school body for years#vent#wagh. maiming killing biting. i wanna be able to express myself#sometimes i realize my gender dysphoria goes beyond just my chest and pronouns and name and i go :(
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it was inevitable i think, not me musing her, but just....the fc and my p.sd for mizu.ki just fits really well and i'm using the same icon p.sd for f.go jeanne that lynnie thinks fits me so i'll use her too . i just. i love...man, everyone's designs in o.shi no ko. it's wild. but if you know me well, are one of my friends, you know how much i love purple. i'll try to work on the meme today i reblogged and at some point i want to get into the ma.nga tho hoo it's way ahead and i'm behind whoop.
also just a side-note, since i feel i've been kinda tame about this? miz.uki has 0 tolerance for disrespect and this isn't like about anything just....if your muse doesn't respect her, she will eviscerate you verbally be at 12 or 18. she has the godlike battle (frankly is she a d.bz chara now damn ) ability / physical strength to back it up, and also the high IQ / wit far above her classmates reading thesis works at 12. to me, i really haven't seen a muse more traumatized, or in so much pain, and in the same breath so strong. we all have that one character we go, 'well damn'.
i have no intentions of woobifying that but being respectful because the queen deserves it and it's just...not appropriate like....they're still people. people who are traumatized are still people with agency and dreams and personalities and choices. so no woobifying the queen. just a head's up i won't hold her back if your muse gets mouthy. this is a girl who with a slight tighter grip, could make a cup smash into ceramic powder or accidentally shatter bone. after things no one can ever understand / go through, she has zero patience. if you know ait.sf, than you know this very well, but not all my mutuals do so just a head's up that there are consequences so i don't want anyone like...surprised rip. she isn't gonna break your character's bones but she will turn into a wildfire.
#seriously this girl if a.ini didn't prove it the og game did my beloved og game...that she is insanely massively overpowered and#a.ini just....it's like she's from d.bz she'd fit RIGHT in while being this detective so yeah sometimes she holds back that biting tongue#but she's gone through too much for someone to do that.#i've been thinking about it a lot lately.#𝐏𝐒𝐀 *ೃ༄ do you wanna get your ass kicked?#𝐎𝐎𝐂 *ೃ༄ what looks gone but comes back even stronger.#if you play a.i you'll know what i mean. i'm not exaggerating this girl being absolutely busted.#but i will explore mizuki's trauma and how she really...doesn't want to.#you only unlock much of that in her route#it's...she's from her experiences with shoko learned to get real quiet about her feelings.#and also just...doesn't want to worry people.#she'll have moments like in the game itself where she's like is this my fault. did i deserve this? is it because of me etc#and she'll always be regressing and progressing.#getting a true family doesn't...erase ...well...insane hell she went through before she ever turned 12 and onward.#it's just tricky for me to write since i don't want to make it too much but also very miz.uki#implied abuse tw
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