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malleux · 1 year ago

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Got any Fluffy albedo hcs?

albedo’s research — headcanons.

-> albedo x gn!reader

-> warnings: albedo worrying about u <3

[a/n]: hi lovelies thank u for requesting i love fontaine and am not burnt out of genshin anymore. i kind of made these headcanons a bit specific with a scenario, but i hope that’s alright!

albedo!! a sweetie pie & the first genshin character to ever make me genuinely look forward to his release because i’ve been here since the beginning frfr

right off the bat, albedo absolutely loves when you help him with his research. you don’t have to be an academic or researcher or anything, he just really appreciates it when you take interest in the things he’s doing and spend time with him.

bonus points if you’re genuinely into it and ask him questions along the way. he’s more than willing to explain anything to you and will reciprocate it if you ever wanted him to join you on something you’re interested in.

some days, he stays at the Knights of Favonius headquarters instead of in Dragonspine, especially if he needs to spend his day at the library to read up on a topic.

whenever this happens, he still appreciates your presence. you don’t have to stay the whole time— he knows how boring it can be— but a visit makes his day immensely better.

super protective over the most unimaginable things. albedo often worries himself sick over your safety.

he knows too many things about the universe and understands all too well just how many things could go wrong or hurt you. he wants nothing more than to figure out every bad thing in the world and make sure it doesn’t get to you.

“I brought you lunch. You’ve been in the same spot since this morning.”

It’s silent in the library, save for your voice and the sound of Lisa’s humming at her own desk across the room. Albedo glances up from the book on the table, a soft smile gracing his face as he recognizes your voice and sees the to-go bag of food from Good Hunter.

“Thank you, dearest.” He watches as you sit beside him, unpacking the contents and bookmarking the book to close it and place it away. You got his favorite dish.

“What even is it that you’re having to read about? The way your brain works, I would expect you to just automatically know everything.” You joked, taking a bite out of a chicken and mushroom skewer.

“Normally, yes, that’s the case.” Albedo returned your quip, “But recently there’s been some new findings published by the Akademiya on their Withering problem. It’s been proven to be spreading, so I’m interested on seeing if there is anything from Mondstadt that could potentially quell it or prevent it from spreading here.”

“Smart.” You mused. “So you’re stressing over a problem that isn’t even ours yet?”

Albedo paused for a moment, proving you correct. “I just want to make sure we are prepared for anything that may come. I need to protect you, as well.”

You rolled your eyes and put down your food, then you pushed down Albedo’s hand from where he was simply holding his lunch. He placed it on the table. You scooted your chair closer to him and placed a hand on his cheek, noticing his rosy cheeks and nose and reminiscing on your times together in Dragonspine.

“I can protect myself.” You assured, your thumb running over his cheekbone.

“I took it upon myself to care for you the minute I asked you to be mine. And I intend to do just that.”

As if to really nail down his point, Albedo pushes his chair back and beckons you even closer. You can’t stop the grin from growing on your face and roll your eyes playfully. Nevertheless, you obliged in his request and straddled the alchemist’s waist, settling on his lap.

Albedo scoots forwards once more, trapping you between his body and the table. One hand rests on your waist while the other opens the book back up. You relax into his chest, burying your nose in the crook of his neck.

“Tell me about this new information. If you want to protect me, you gotta let me know what I need protecting from.”

#lay speaks #fic blog #x reader #genshin impact #fanfiction #writing #lay writes #genshin impact x reader #asks #requests #albedo #albedo x reader #albedo x gender neutral reader #albedo genshin impact #albedo genshin #genshin albedo

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1moreoffkeyanthem · 1 year ago

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Ok I did a post on my headcanons for OrangeJuiceVerse Stan not too long ago, and uhhhhh it’s Kyle’s turn.

• This mf has a whole complex about needing to “save” everyone around him, his whole life, and his partner receives the height of that. Kenny also got the brunt of it for a time, and Kyle considered himself and Stan to be their friend’s surrogate parents. He still worries, even though Kenny is a self made man later.

• on a similar note, Kyle is particularly protective of those he cares for, but not really himself. Once, in middle school, Cartman thought he was being funny and called Stan a “washed up alcoholic just like his father” and Kyle FUCKING DECKED HIM. It took half the schoolyard to break them up, and landed him in anger management counseling for a hot minute. That incident was also what triggered Cartman to work on himself a little, and Kyle will always be proud of that.

• For a while, Kyle was EXTREMELY pissed that he never grew taller than 5’7, and was the smallest on the basketball team until the one season Kenny joined, and he actually resented Sheila for giving him “short angry ginger genes” but he doesn’t mind so much when he grows up. He is still terrified of being perceived as weak, though.

•that whole thing gets worse whenever he has a bad leg day, and he deflects onto those around him harder than ever when he’s feeling vulnerable. He’s pretty guarded by nature, and hates needing help sometimes.

•the guy has ocd. It shows itself more when he’s stressed.

•IS NOT a fan of the outdoors, but puts up with hikes and camping trips for Stan’s sake.

•if you ask what his biggest fear is, he’ll usually say something along the lines of “not leaving an impact on the world”. OJV Kyle needs to be needed, and genuinely tries to be a positive influence. (Btw if u ask Stan the same question, he says “losing Kyle”) fuck.

•Kyle is THE number one hypeman for his friends, and especially his partner, and he can talk up a storm about any of them. He’s just so proud of everyone in his life, and gets way too worked up.

•he tends to overthink everything, particularly back in high school, with his relationship with Stan. However, he did make the first move, newly confident and smitten after his super best friend was so supportive and sweet during his eating disorder treatment. He asked if he could kiss him, Stan said yes, they kissed, Stan said “thanks, dude”, burst into tears, and then Kyle laughed as he held him. The moment was mentioned in their wedding speeches, and Stan cried again. Kyle holds that kiss close to his heart forever.

•Kyle HATES when people shut him out, because how is he supposed to be there for them otherwise? He gets scared every time Stan goes through a Sad Sack episode, because he can’t lose him either.

•diabetic Kyle frfr, and after the ed, he got a dexcom. Cartman called him a “jewbot”, and that was the last time Kyle kicked his ass. He does like not having to inject his insulin himself, but hates the constant reminder on his body that he’s stuck with a condition he can’t get rid of.

•Stan and Kenny participated in blood drives whenever they could as teenagers and in college, and while Kyle couldn’t for obvious reasons, he was there to drive them to and from, make sure they ate, and to make way too big a deal about it. The two of them, and even Cartman, donated in his name senior year, just so he could still get a red cord for graduation. He cried in public, and felt embarrassed.

•NEVER considered himself to be that much of an animal person, but when Stan came home with a little brown cat he’d already dubbed “Moose” for the sake of being funny, Kyle fell in love. He likes having something to take care of that won’t object to his overbearingness.

•he loves to play video games but DESPISES anything puzzle based. As smart as he is, he gets frustrated easily and happily lets Stan take over anything that doesn’t have explicit instructions.

•speaking of instructions, he’s a great cook and picked up a love of it growing up. His mother taught him all she knows, and the precise nature of baking in particular calms him.

•his love language is ABSOLUTELY words of affirmation, and he has that in common with Tweek. Stan can be incredibly oblivious sometimes, and Kyle’s had more than a few breakdowns over the years about having to ask to be told he’s doing a good job, that he’s a worthwhile person, and his heart breaks every time Stan gets apologetic over not validating him enough. He was unbelievably giddy that Stan said “I love you” first.

•Kyle didn’t think he’d like pet names, but being called “baby”, and “darling” make him melt. “Dude” is also something that gained a romantic meaning, and holy shit he goes wild for Stan calling him “my love” in elvish. They love roleplaying, especially Stan’s nerd ass, but Kyle is competitive about not being the first to break character. Usually all it takes is Kyle being tender with his “knight” for Stan to lose it, and it’s hilarious.

•he pretends to hate the dumbass puns Stan makes whenever something needs fixing around the house, but the toolbelt, rolled up sleeves, and yes, the jokes about “drilling” get him hot and bothered. Not quite as much as the elf king/ knight roleplay, but STILL.

•they’re both incredibly loud during sex. Their first time was awkward and took hours to figure out, and Mister Brightside was playing once they got the hang of it. He also loves that Stan let’s him take the lead when it comes to intimacy, never wanting to let Kyle feel at the mercy of a bigger man unless he explicitly asks for it. They check in with each other constantly and it’s very sweet. Moose is not allowed in the room until they’re both dressed again.

•Kyle runs hot when he sleeps but doesn’t like to walk around shirtless. He runs hot in general, really, which is why Kenny and Stan clung to him all the time growing up in the snow. Will not turn the heat on in his car unless it’s truly below freezing.

•so. The orange juice thing. The Kyle Matthew Broflovski Special came into existence because even though he CONSISTENTLY denies it, he’s rather picky and prone to nostalgia. His favorite cup is cracked and faded, but the Terrance and Phillip on the side are still clear as day in his heart. He claims that nothing gets his blood sugar up when it’s too low like orange juice with seven ice cubes and a pinch of salt, other than the sweet kiss from Stan he receives along with it.

•started off in premed in college, but his first psychology class had him hooked. Any way he can help other people, he’s there.

•quit the basketball team senior year of hs for a few reasons. He was nose to the grindstone academically, wasn’t the player he used to be prior to fucking up half the tendons in his knee, and though he’d never tell him, the main reason he quit when he did was in solidarity with Stan. Because Stan broke his throwing arm early into his last ever football season, and Kyle wasn’t about to let him miss out on sports alone. He was always a little jealous about how well his boyfriend healed from that, but the pair had always been that way. Stan bounced back where Kyle didn’t, and vice versa.

•after that first AA meeting he attended with Stan, he didn’t drink for a long time. Partly out of support (and fear) but partly because he didn’t know if that was allowed and he didn’t want to ask. It wasn’t until Kenny and Marj’s wedding a few months later, when Kenny apologized profusely for not thinking about the open bar being a potential trigger, and Stan assuring him that it was fine, that he wasn’t upset and wouldn’t care if others around him drank, that Kyle had a few glasses of wine. He then proceeded to let the love of his life fuck him over the hotel counter, twist his bad knee in his tipsy carelessness, and allow his knight in shining armor to carry him to the truck the next morning. They both found it funny, Kyle letting go in celebration like he had, but their own wedding was strictly dry. Randy was kicked out by an angry Kyle halfway through the reception for daring to bring a flask. Craig and Kyle have outstanding bistro meetups when their husbands are at AA. they don’t order more than a few drinks.

• People tend to cry a lot around him, but he likes being their safe space. With the kids at the school where he works, and with his friends and husband.

•Kyle came out as gay in 8th grade, first to Stan, then to his mom, and then to the rest of the people in his life. No one was even a little surprised, but he didn’t care. Kenny was already out as pan, Marj following shortly after with accepting that she was actually a girl, and Stan had admitted that he wasn’t particularly straight shortly before confessing his feelings to Kyle. Wendy knew before him, which Kyle was only a little offended by.

•he acts like he hates being told he’s attractive, but is actually really insecure and slightly vain about his appearance. That wasn’t the reason behind the high school ed, even though some people (Cartman) thought it was. General feelings of inferiority, overcompensation; Kyle’s all to familiar with the lingo.

•OLDEST. DAUGHTER. COMPLEX. Kyle’s not a daughter, but the baggage of that mindset with him is wild.

•stress cleans. Stan can usually get him to calm down, but he’s the only one who can.

•his relationship with Cartman changed dramatically as they grew up, and his longtime frenemy had his own way of caring by the time they all were teenagers. He was still blunt and crass, an asshole, but maintained that HE was the only one allowed to rip on the guys. Kyle actually stopped calling him “fatass” for a while after outpatient, until Cartman complained about him being an “overly sensitive little anorexic bitch now” and that “he wasn’t a snowflake like that”. That exchange was what told him that Cartman was just as reluctant for anything to change as he was.

•he’s really close with Wendy and Bebe, Tolkien, Clyde, everyone from their class really. His original friend group, now with the addition of Craig and Tweek, will always be the closest.

•Kyle was the one who suggested the apartment complex that he and Stan moved to after college. The older couples who lived there were more than happy to meet some “young folks”, and they all do fireworks and a parking lot party on holidays. Stan mans the grill unless Kenny drives down to join, and wears Kyle’s stupid Star of David apron. It’s hot, and he definitely gets rewarded for it after the celebrations die down.

•Kyle still doesn’t keep kosher, because he doesn’t like to stare at ingredients and nutrition information on packaging, which Stan refers to as “the food lore”. If something might be iffy for him as a diabetic, whoever he’s with checks, and only tells him enough to know if he’s going to need to compensate medically. He started attending synagogue more often after Stan started his sobriety journey, and definitely maintains his faith. It’s comforting to believe in a higher power, even if that means relenting some control.

•the “Style Wedding” is an odd mix of traditional and non traditional things, naturally, but Kyle wears a yarmulke with his elf king crown and smashes the glass after vows. They cut the cake with a sword from the scabbard Stan wore with his suit, and The Reins of Castamere is strictly forbidden from the dj station. Kyle sometimes wishes they would’ve splurged for New Zealand for the honeymoon, but they wanted to take that particular trip when they were older.

• Kyle gets oddly close with Shelley over the years, and doesn’t complain that she calls him “turdling”. It’s nice to have an older sibling, and they truly argue like siblings.

•speaking of, Ike and Stan RELISH in being obnoxious on rp games. Kyle will wake up for water at 3 am to hear Stan in the office talking in a ridiculous accent and wander in to watch him wreak havoc on an innocent gta server as “Mattress Mike” or something. It’s really cute how into roleplay his husband can get, especially teamed up with his nuisance of a little brother.

•Kyle thinks he’s a good driver, but the road rage is terrifying. He’s a fantastic passenger princess, though.

•he can out argue everyone on this planet excluding his mother, and WILL. He’s not very big or intimidating, but he’s scarily smart and goes for the throat. When he and Stan fight, it’s incredibly petty and doesn’t last long, but they know each other too well not to know how to cut deep. Kyle regrets his part in any conflict every time.

• At his core, Kyle cares too much about everything. Is that a bad thing? Sometimes. But more often than not, it’s something he likes about himself.

This is so many hcs I’m sorry lmao but just… KYLE

and here’s the link to OrangeJuiceVerse if anyone’s down, it’s my favorite ongoing au that I’ve come up with

#south park #fandom #sp fanfiction #style au #ao3 shit #my shit #headcanons #help i love kyle #i had to #this is so much #but like style #I’m such a Kyle gremlin #ramblings #PastorCraigEnjoyer #series #OrangeJuiceVerse #totally not even sorry #this is so long

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strawbrygashez · 8 months ago

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If all da pdudes went to high school together …

• Shy & quiet type but very smart. Gets good grades.

•Has multiple interests that would be seen as nerdy.

•Metalhead but also enjoys grunge.

•is a furry but you wouldn’t know unless u asked him or saw the inside of his sketch book.

Redux

•Calls himself P1s alpha wolf. He’s extremely protective of P1 even tho p1 never asked him to be. He basically glued himself to p1 bc he has a crush on him.

•Is honestly almost a bully to other people but no one takes him super seriously because he wears one of those clip on tails.

•He’s the type to write gruesome lyrics on his notebooks & draws demons and whatnot.

•P1 doesn’t hate him or anything or tells him to stop being ‘cringe’. He just is like •_• all the time. He’ll at least thank him tho if redux scares off someone who was picking on him.

•Redux hates P3 so much. He tries to make P3 uncomfortable or scared but it doesn’t work bc P3 just laughs at him. P3 can’t take him seriously.

•Is dating P1. Redux wants to rip his throat out over it but Redux knows P1 would hate him if he did something to P3 so P3 just has to deal with glares.

•Is only somewhat a furry. He only has a fursona bc he asked p1 to draw him as a furry just for fun once. He’d happily accompany redux & p1 to a convention tho.

•Still obsessed with memes like normal P3 Dude is. All he does during class is gather memes to send to the group chat later. He has terrible grades.

•The type of guy to cuddle up with P1 (and redux if he wasn’t edgy) in the hallway.. he doesn’t really care when ppl say they almost tripped them. Just a “oh sorry :)!” With a wave before focusing back onto p1 (he makes no effort to get out of peoples way)

•Talks loudly & eats messily at lunch. (Redux can not understand what P1 sees in him at all and makes it obvious he thinks this by the way he looks while watching P3 try to eat and talk about YTPs he watched at the same time)

•Hangs out with them all sometimes because he has nothing better to do and they are all funny to watch.

•Is surprisingly good at giving advice to any of them when needed.

•He’s quick to pick up on when something’s wrong & when something happened between any of them (He could tell Redux likes P1 like after a couple of minutes of hanging out with the two)

•If he wasn’t a loner he probably would have picked on P1 and Redux but.. he has his own mental issues & whatnot so he’s ‘stuck with them’.

•Close to P4.

•Complains about his ‘bitchy’ girlfriend all the time.

•He invites them all to hang out around the trailer park with him or go spend nights at his uncle Dave’s house.

•There’s a weird thing between Redux and him where Redux thinks he’s just like P2 because P2 is genuinely cool and mysterious and whatnot but P2 cringes when Redux acts like they are totally the same. (Redux ‘he’s just like me frfr’ moment)

(I will add on to this with more maybe later 💀)

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nothinginthisworldbelongstome · 2 months ago

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Favorite animal?

Favorite game?

Tell us about your favorite character?

(For the ask thingy :3. Please yap to me)

aw yay hi nym! tysm for the ask ur so sweet!

i have so many favorite animalsss but i especially love corvids, like ravens and crows. theyre SO cool and smart, like they use tools! and they can learn to mimic things just like parrots! and theyre super important in different superstitions, i love the associations with witches/spooky stuff, and theyre just so awesome and i love them!

i dont really have a favorite VIDEO game, which i assume is what the ask is about lol. i dont play video games, just like games on my phone. templerun 2, happy color, royal match, etc lol. but i loveeee board games and card games theyre so fun! its only fun with a bunch of people that u get to talk to while u play tho. my extended family has our special version of canasta (a card game) that has been passed down for like 3 or 4 generations by now, and i think thats something so cool and special. we play it practically anytime we're together and i love that we have that special game that one day ill get to teach my partner and kids!

omg i have soooo many favorite characters. the ones currently in my mind rn are dani and jamie from the haunting of bly manor, which is actually the best show in the world and i love it dearly, i could talk about its genius for hours and if u read this u need to go watch it!!! but dani and jamie are the cutest, their characterizations are incredible, their romance is amazing and heartbreaking and i need a love like theirs someday frfr

thank u so much for the ask nym! have a great rest of ur day/night!

#mutual!#ask!

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kindchenschema · 6 months ago

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& to the points you made in my other ask, yes, yes and yesss. LOVE what you said about maggie like so true. i get being territorial but the fans go past that and get viciously nasty and it negates any real criticisms. she’s my baby but im glad she’s free from the show tbh because they weren’t giving her anything to work with anyway.

and SLC forever! pls go on about puppy amelia if u want lol because on paper she’s exactly the kind of character i should live for but ive never been able to get into her? idky like even knowing her plot of private practice hasn’t helped. and i wanna get the hype i have fomo lmao

& to ur other ask where you outlined ur faves and potential ships, first of all, inspired choices love it. and second, you didn’t ask but i would add tedstina. didn’t see it for the first time but on my second watch they jumped out to me and they’ve been my main non canon ship forever. cannot believe the writers had them arguing over that man when they could’ve ditched him to go eat each other out and then cured heart disease or something. a shame lmao 3/3

i feel the same way, if you asked me to tell you what maggie did in her last 3-4 seasons on the show i would have to plead the fifth or something because i genuinely do not know 😭 but i do remember watching those seasons and being like damn i miss s11-12 maggie (the riggs drama between her and meredith was like contender for top 5 annoying things to happen on this stupid ass show and it pretty much went downhill from there)

puppy amelia... um okay 😶 well what do you wanna know 🤪

no um 😭 like ok idk i just love when characters are all "i love you please let me love you and please love me back" and the other person is like.. cold and lowkey hates them at first but reluctantly grows to love them.. and lets them sleep curled up at the foot of their bed or reaches out to pet their hair when they've had a bad day like OKAY !!!!! will never forgive the writers for forgetting about mermelia after s12 like it was genuinely the most complex, angsty, bordering on sadomasochistic relationship to ever happen on this godforsaken show okay stop I NEED TO SHUT UP NOW but like as i said . it was/is GENUINE brainrot.

(side note whenever i rewatch s12 i get this like. overwhelming instinct to protect and take care of amelia like i literally become a butch lesbian for her. my butch lesbian serve 💅)

(in particular i also think the whole "meredith forgiving amelia for being the wrong sister and the wrong shepherd" is so...... mitski washing machine heart "i know who you pretend i am".... much to consider)

ok now i will shut up frfr this is what happens when you ask me about mermelia and girl don't get me Started on addimelia because genuinely i'm Kind of deranged, but you know what, i love myself and that's all that matters ❤️

anywayyy 😋 yes you probably didn't see but shortly after posting that i went back to add tedstina because HELLO, how could i forget about tedstina (well i haven't rewatched their main seasons for a long time that's how), i don't know what those two had going on but it was definitely something homosexual. there was a man there for some reason but literallyyy cristina going on and on about how much she loves teddy (esp when you consider that her type is canonically tall and blonde *cough* izzie) and teddy being like wow cristina you're my best student you're so smart and talented and let's make out 🥰

thank you soooo much for these anons, they really make my day (even if i don't get to them immediately) and please stay in contact even though there won't be new episodes for a while <3

#asks #anon bestie

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jrueships · 3 years ago

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Omg I just thought of such a good ask [redacted] or not. Tell us more about Keldon and Anthony Edwards 🤭

And it only took 500 posts about them to get this ask ...

IM KIDDING I can't believe I apparently got this ask like five hundred years ago and just. Never saw it. Insane. People who ask me stuff then see me just continue to reblog and post without answering must be pissed off at me but i SWEAR I don't do it on purpose 😭😭 I just forget and have zero attention span 😭 but YES finALLY i get to talk about THEM RAAAAGH!!!! YEA!

OKAY SO... the Idea of someone whose favorite musician is Mariah Carey bein in a relationship with someone who's favorite rapper is lil baby.. is Really funny to me. Not even in some white 'omg rap is so hArdCoRe' nonsense way, but that they're both such Strange favorites to have.. not as odd as James Harden being lil baby's husband but STILL. It shows a little shared Niche interests and yet so different ones at the same time! The idea of keldon and ant singing a mariah Carey song in the car together .. keldon screeching the windows cracked.. ant calling up record stations to let them know a new power singer duo is coming out (literally And hypothetically). Seemingly Extreme opposites who aren't Really all that opposite is just.. chefs kiss man !! Some people would originally think like 'oh keldon is kinda a cheezeball like they won't get along ant is too Cool' or whatever but ant is ALSO a huge dork and together they act like such DORKS that people wonder why they ever doubted their friendship in the first place! Friendly Rivals to best friends to lovers perchaps 🤔 ?? IDK ! They're very ' Dude, what does my tattoo say?' "Sweet!" What about mine?' ' "Dude!" What does mine say?' "Sweet!" What about -' and etcetc!

Also .. not to be zodiacy but.. ant is a leo and keldon is a libra and Trust Me. They are VERY compatible. They can bounce off each other and joke with each other! Laugh at ALL eachothers jokes, help confidence boost up each other's egos! Both are Pretty Clingy signs so they wanna be With each other and make each other feel good Mutually!! Essentially be each other's hype mans! They can be competitive with each other but in a constructive and joking way that drives the other forward without discouraging them !! But ALSo they can both be serious and there for the other when needed which is REALLY important. Both have feelings that others tend to discard due to their outer personalities. They're one of those ships that are like.. u can't even really Explain why they're good together ... they just Are. And those are really some of my Favs !

💙💙💙💙

FOR THE FIC IDEA WITH THEM.. i had like. So many ideas.. one was a jousting knight romance LMAO.. but ill tell one of the simpler fic ideas i had in mind to sound sane.. it's a lil cheesy apartment pets idea n .. yea <3

SO BASICALLY.. ant is walking his dog by having it run while he follows it on a skateboard. He's been TRYING to teach ant Jr how to skateboard too like all those cool skateboardinh dogs with the sunglasses, but it's a work in progress! But his dog starts running and it makes him collide with Keldon on his rollarskates walking HIS dog! They apologize! Ant Jr starts trying to hump keldons dog.. a boy dog.. it's cool they don't judge tho <3 love wins LMAO

and then they realize like.. hey! That's my old highschool classmate! Ant was basically like.. Mr. Football in highschool. Popular, in every sport, most likely to become president one day, charming, got a ton of girls , golden boy etcetc. Everyone expected him to do good things! Keldon and him were Friends but like.. class friends. Keldon helped him pass biology and zoology, which ant took ONLY for the field trips! They talk and keldon is like.. REALLY admiring of ant and wants to know how well he's doing and what professional sport he's in rn and ant is like.. oh Shit. I gotta Impress him!! So he elaborates on some.. Tall Tales. Tells keldon how he Could've gone to the nba but the nba saw he was gonna be Michael Jordan 2.0 so they HAD to NOT let him join in sake of mj's legendary legacy. Or how he once beat Micheal Phelps in a swim race all by swimming straight down to the other side of the earth and coming back at the end of the pool Still beating Michael's time. Or how he was SO good at dancing with the stars that he made the judges feel So inferior that they refused to air his episode, Or how he hit a baseball through the scoreboard and downing a space shuttle that sent Google maps crashing for five days. Just a Ton of things to impress keldon, which it DOES because keldon is kind of stupid 😭 and0 his genuine enthusiasm and praise makes ant into a perpetual Elaborater (liar) because he loves keldons little gap toothed smile SO much. They talk some more, introduce their dogs, keldon gives ant Jr a treat he REALLY likes! then ant says how he's recently moved to this new apartment that allows some bigger dogs. Turns out keldon lives in the same apartment complex on the same floor! They exchange room numbers and suggest a visit and leave from there! Ant really WANTS to visit but he also doesn't know what to do about all his lies.. tell it to keldon straight? He feels Awful for lying so much, likes he's twelve again or something.. but he doesn't want to let keldon down .. IN HIS DEFENSE.. he didn't think keldon would actually Buy into them.. but ALAS! A moral dilemma !

But then later in the night ant's dog gets out and Fatefully scratches at keldon's door, craving more treats. Ant runs out in his patrick seastar styled pj's to get him and scoops him up only for keldon to wake up and answer the door in his spongebob pjs. Ant apologizes, explains the situation, turns to leave all embarrassed and scolding his dog for waking keldon up (and himself), only for keldon to invite him inside and tell him it's okay. They let their dogs play as they drink hot cocoa together and bond. Keldon tells him he's working at a zoo nearby helping with the agriculture! The plants and plains etc! Then ant is like.. shit. Thats REALLY cool.. I gotta tell him smthing cool too.. so he just starts LYING again!! Says he's some big time rapper who gets like 10 million views per SONG! keldon of course BUYS IT.. n the lies Grow. EVENTUALLY the whole 'ants dog shows up at keldon's door' event continues until it becomes a daily part of their lives! Keldon sets an alarm for night labeled 'ant jrs treat time!!' Which he later adds ' and big eds talk time!!' Ant starts staying over till the morning.. they play videogames.. ant helps (chaotically) make keldon breakfast, keldon gives ant some plants to take back to his apartment and decorate.. ant writes some (romantic) rhymes about keldon..

Then one day dame, an actually Famous rapper who lives a door across keldon's with cj and their shared adopted stray kitten, visits keldon at work while keldon is shoveling zebra shit and he's like 'sorry 2 bother you bruh but I saw this one dude setting up his? Dog ? at your door?? Like telling it to sit n stay then hiding behind a corner n coming out as soon as you open the door ???' N keldon is like 'ant???' And dame is like 'that's his name? He keeps commentin on my songs, sayin how they suck. He's kinda a lil hater cus he ain't make it big yet, i think? Cj don't really like him, but i don't mind the talk. I'm jus sayin tho.. if he's botherin you or sumn.. lemme know. Just wanted to tell you that' so yeah.. keldon finds out LOL

Next night ant's Other dog is at keldons door. Keldon waits to ant acts like he ran all the way over in a hurry to ask him if he keeps putting his dog here on purpose. Ant says 'nuh uh. different dog.. see?' Keldon doesn't buy it, let's him inside though, and they talk.. Basically keldon is like 'you know.. you don't have to make excuses on wanting to hang out because- I DO! i really DO wanna talk to you and hang out and play videogames and all that stuff!! It's okay! I think you're really cool, you know!! Big star or not!' And ant is like... shieeet.. alright... n he comes clean. Profusely apologizes for lying all the time.. ready to cut things off.. but keldon Doesn't. He forgives him, understands how bad pressures can be.. is a little flattered how much ant wanted to impress Him when keldon was already impressed Enough from just Seeing him! They reconcile.. ant let's keldon know 'no more lies . ' and keldon nods .. and Ant leans close. Holds him close and dips him well enough to make a dancing with the stars judge jealous . Kisses him soft, and tells keldon he loves him.

#SO YEAH.. THOSE ARE MY THOUGHTS!!!!!#NOT redacted btw 😭😭#just softness about two dumb jocks in a relatiobship!!#dumb and dumber who are the only ones that see smart qualities in each other kinda relationships are my kryptonite fr fr #if u thought i stopped with the insane rarepairs u r WRONG!!!#wont stop CANT stop!!#marcus/giannis was only the BEGINNING..#thank u SM for this ask FRFR I LOVED IT!!#talking about them is RLLY fun!#if anyone wants 2 hear more dont be afraid to lemme know!#it may take me 500 years to see it but i WILL i SWEAR!#EVENTUALLY LMAO #keldon/ant #ted asks #ted drabbles

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yoichichi · 4 years ago

Text

Pretty People Supremacy Playlist 🖤

for my angel @1010andneji , I hope you love it 🖤

disclaimers: fem!reader, because this a request for someone with she/her pronouns, I believe the reader is referred to as she/her a few times, Kenma is aged up and this is based in him attending University just to be clear‼️

warning: it gets a little saucy in the make out department ?

gif not mine, credit to owner

a/n: ahhhhh!!! I’m sorry this took so long and I really hope you like it and you felt like it was worth the wait! Please let me know if you need me to change anything ‼️ i luv you bae 😔✊🏼 also thank you to my wife @ikigaitooru for helping me choose your matchup here! I was stuck between one other person but we ultimately decided on Kenma, we both believe he exhibits prime quiet himbo energy :) also I kind of went off and wrote a lot on this one 😶 sorry I think? Regardless, I hope you enjoy!!!

Relationship Headcannons

Ok so ultimately, I paired you together NOT just cause you thinks he’s pretty but I think you guys would be so good together!! Like you would be so good for him

You guys would balance each other out socially and just be the best pair to hang out with pleaseee

He knows he can be stupid and chaotic with you and you know you can let yourself wind down with him!!

Kenma CAN be blunt sometimes so I’m sure he’d have to catch onto your sensitivity at first, but he’d be so sincere if he ever accidentally said or did anything that made you feel some type of way

And once he is aware of your sensitivity he’s constantly reassuring you in little ways, not only that he understands and is trying to comfort you but just to reassure you he loves you, for example :

HAND SQUEEZES

I know some people have mentioned that he wouldn’t be into PDA but I disagree! It’s just not in the conventional let me be all over you types of PDA

I feel like it’s just not a big deal to him cause he’s like 🤨 what do I have to be embarrassed for?? This my mf baby and I’m gonna hold her hand if I want to ??

Like, I see him as a big hand holder frfr

He would just see it as such an easy way to be physically close to you and even if that’s just holding pinky’s he’s down!

It would also help him if he’s feeling anxious!

Like he’d fiddle with your hands and fingers if he’s feeling particularly antsy or nervous

You guys are out and he wants to go in a different direction? He’s definitely bringing your hand to his lips to give a quick peck and pull you along

“C’mon, let’s look over here”

AND HES SO NONCHALANT ABOUT IT TOO LIKE HE JUST DOESNT QUITE REALIZE THE EFFECT HE HAS ON YOU WHEN HE DOES THAT (he totally does but he likes to be slick and act like he doesn’t 🙄)

He would also DEFINITELY let you play with his hands if you’re nervous or bored or whatever reason honestly, he’d find it soothing and knows it occupies you or fills a need (and you get to look at pretty Kenma hands c’mon now)

ANYWAYS there are other little ways he’d reassure you too besides hand squeezes and holding

Definitely the type to leave you little notes in places for you to find them and they’d always say such simple things like “hi- kenma <3” LMAOOOO PLS HES TRYING HIS BEST

I think the final biggest way he’d love to reassure you would be words of affirmation (this is definitely a private thing)

I think he’d still deliver them in a blunt manner but that’s how you know he’s sincere!

You two would just be chilling at his place and you’d do something simple like, ask how much water he’s drank today or play with his hair and tell him he shouldn’t overwork himself and he’d just look at you so seriously and be like, “I really appreciate you, you know that?”

And it’d be sort of deadpan but like !!!

And he’d just kiss your hand after - always the palm - and then he’d just press his cheek into your hand before kissing it one more time and moving on like that literally just didn’t happen KENMA KING OF HAND KISSES

Okok moving on before I get stuck on his hands again anskdkdksiaj

So we don’t talk about himbo Kenma enough!!!! Like ok

He’s NOT big and ripped like ya know Bokuto and he seems super smart but I’m telling you this man is a quiet clueless himbo ‼️

You can’t tell me you’d be talking on and on about biology or something and he’d just have this little lost look in his eye while he’s nodding along and smiling softly listening to you talk and you’re like ,,??

“Wait, do you even understand what I’m saying?”

And he’d really just be like no :)

“but your eyes are really pretty and I like watching your lips move while you talk :) (this man is also a king of innocent flirting and you can’t tell me otherwise!!!)

OMG and if you’re even the slightest bit flustered by his comment he WILL notice and he’ll do his best to hide his sly little smile and just grab one of your hands and squeeze it and be like, “keep going, I’m listening”

KENMA HIMBO NATION RISE

Ok ALSO you two would literally just be such a pretty couple? Just like so pleasing to look at????? Like you’re both so pretty it’s unfair! And your style OMG

Like you’re just so soft like the epitome of 🦋✨👼☁️☺️ girl and 🎮🎱🖤👾🌙 boy ykwim???

and his long hair PLS Kenma man bun supremacy 🙌🏼

I can’t stress enough how pretty you two would be it would just make sense seeing you two together ugh

UGH you dying Kenmas hair for him?? And he’d just sit cross legged in a chair while you do it and he keeps leaning and moving to wherever you are around him cause your hands are in his hair and it’s so soothing!! What’s he supposed to do??

“Kenma, stay still you’re gonna bet bleach on my shirt!”

“But didn’t you wear that in case bleach did get on it?”

“Kenma-“

“I’m just saying if that’s the case then I don’t understand why I can’t hug you while you bleach my hair? 🤨”

“😐”

“Ok so-“

“Kenma.”

“😒”

Yeah queue pouty Kenma acting indifferent 🙄✋🏼

Just give him a kiss on his nose and he’ll get over it even though he’ll feign his grumpiness to get treated like a baby a little bit longer

UGH PLS I GOTTA STOP I COULD GO ON FOREVER

Bottom line, Kenma’s your quiet little himbo and you’re his loud soft girlfriend, and it’s one of the most adorable things ever

Ok, so we’re finally to what you came for LMAO, your playlist!

OKOK so similar to the first one I made, there’s no theme besides music taste so I tried to make this like a soundtrack of your guys relationship if that makes sense?

I really hope you enjoy and please let me know if you need any changes or would like to be paired up with someone else 🖤‼️ Without further ado, your songs and explanations!

1. Siren - Kailee Morgue: ok I think this one still kind of fits the vibe you’re looking for but you can’t tell me Kenma didn’t see you as some bewitching vixen who’s caught his attention LMAO like he’s just like 👁👄👁 she’s so pretty and entrancing help me! and he’d try to be like haha I’m cool I’m cool I’m fine 😎🥴😎 but it’s so obvious he likes you too (you’d kind of be able to tell with the way he looks at you and how it took so long for the blush to leave his neck and ears whenever he’d talk to you) but he just really decides he has no choice in the matter, he wants you so bad LMAO

2. Juice - iyla: more off the first one, the way you just appeared into Kenmas life LMAO like he saw you and just 😳🥴😍‼️ and once he started to feel real feelings he’d be so 🏃‍♂️💨 WHERE THE FUCK DID SHE COME FROM??? But he wants you so BAD he can’t do anything about it, and now not only does he just want you 😳 but he wants you and he wants to be yours , pls he has it hard

3. See You Again (feat. Kali Uchis) - Tyler, The Creator: ok this is like THE song to your guys relationship just UGH I know you two would have such pining. Kenma would DEFINITELY be nervous to even talk to you at first cause he’s definitely like 🥴 she’s prettt hhng and he’s so shy and you just have such HEART EYES over him and you don’t even hide it that well LMAO (“it’s them rose colored cheeks yeah it’s them dirt colored eyes 😔😩”- u @ him) and it just makes him so NERVOUS!! But you two would definitely dance around it for a bit like you’d just be so 😍‼️ He’s pretty and shy hehe I like him gimme gimme 😍 and he’d be so flustered by it at first until you guys FINALLY get over yourselves (when kenma stops being a baby LMAO) like you guys jus wanna kiss so bad and literally everyone’s like JUST FUCKING DO IT, SHIT it’s adorable really

4. Doves In The Wind (feat. Kendrick Lamar) - SZA: ok I know this song is kinda saucy an idk if it’s overplayed but listen YOU CANT TELL ME THIS ISNT KENMAS FUCKING ANTHEM!! like he jus absolutely jams to this song definitely a sza stan and loves playing vibey music like hers during his gaming sessions but like the way he would worship the ground you walk on and be like mf im HERS do not get it twisted, in no way does she belong to me buT THE WAY I BELONG TO HER WHEW ‼️

5. Moment - Victoria Monét: ok why do I feel like most of the songs I added on here are vaguely steamy LMAO but ok this song? Yeah whew 💨 this is definitely one of those songs that play while you two would be lazily making out with those little led lights on (you just know kenma has those) and you two would just be laying there and know this is one of those moments you guys are never gonna forget. Your hands are just roaming and caressing each other while your lips are locked and you guys are so breathless and it’s just wow, you guys must have manifested each other cause this moment is so perfect between you two. And even though it’s a little sloppy it’s so intimate and you both feel like you’re living in a dream. messy hair flushed Kenma whos breathing heavy? Yeah I think so

6. Deep Cuts - Healy: Kenma is always trying his hardest to be the best he can when he loves something. We know this we’ve all seen him and Tora when it comes to volleyball and the way he gets with Hinata. And this wouldn’t change when it comes to your guys relationship, he is constantly going to be putting in his best effort to get to know you better, be the best boyfriend he can be to you and make you feel as loved as he can. He’s memorized everything there is to know about you and sometimes he gets lost in that and it makes him insecure about himself from his overthinking (you can’t tell me he’s not a chronic overthinker) and he’d forget to just enjoy himself sometimes. Like Kenma stop stressing, you can relax when you hold her hand. But he’d reach this point with you when he’d probably be being a bit difficult and you’d just make him feel so loved. He had been overworking himself again, which you HATED. You could tell from the bags under his eyes and the way his hair was messily pulled back into a low bun and the way the neckline of his hoodie showed he wasn’t even wearing a shirt underneath. But it was date night!! So what if he was tired and overworked quality time is important to you!!! I mean, that’s what he’s thinking. But you would just pull him into a hug and kiss his forehead and start to undress into comfy clothes and he’d be so confused like ?? Uhm, date night?? And you’d just pull him to your shared bed by his sleeve and under the covers and into your arms while you just kissed the top of his head. You’d take his hair out of his bun and run your fingers through it getting rid of some of the tangles and just be so CARING to him. “Let’s just stay in, you’re tired and I’d rather lay with you while you get some sleep, we can always go out another time.” Yeah he’s in love that’s it ‼️ you make him feel like he’s exactly enough for you as he is and that’s all he wants pls tbis is so long and for what??? Like this could be a Drabble in itself??? Anyways

7. Easy - DaniLeigh: you guys are definitely an exclusive couple but you really show Kenma what it means to just take it slow and relax! After the date night (deep cuts) he knows it’s ok to just relax into your guys love and he doesn’t have to force or rush anything cause it all comes naturally. Secondly , the WAY THIS BOY MAKES YOU FEEL - he just always looks at you with these deep eyes that hold so much love and it makes you feel so exposed every time cause he just loves you so much and it’s so intense l. It makes your face heat up cause he so clearly thinks your perfect. Also, this just gives total late night ride vibes. Kenma would definitely be driving on the freeway and this song comes on and he just places his hand on your thigh while he’s driving and he’s humming along to this song and he can feel you staring at him so he just casts you a quick side glance and goes “hmmm?” And you’re like 👁👄👁 nothing (Kenma is the king of late night car ride music fr)

8. CPR - Summer Walker: ok I don’t even need to explain myself with this one, the song is so self explanatory! You just make each other feel so at home. Point blank ‼️ like Kenma will just think back like 😇 where would I be without this bitch the thought makes him truly sad and he likes to avoid it at all costs

9. Rain - Lucy Park: pls this song is so soft (I hope it fits the vibe ahhh!!) but this is just more of kenma being an absolute softy for you LMAO. He’s not very good at taking care of himself sometimes and you’re always there to be like 😡‼️ NO‼️ and it makes him so soft he can’t help it, it’s not that he does it on purpose cause that’s insane but the fact you know his limits when even he doesn’t sometimes blows his mind and he’s never felt more loved than in those moments (let’s bring up Deep Cuts again 🙄✋🏼 pls this boy just needs someone soft to put him in his place LOL)

10. moonlight - dhruv: ok but when Kenma knows he’s in love with you, he has to tell you. And what better way to tell you than, well, tell you. He’d definitely try to plan it in his head to be perfect like ok what’s her favorite place? Where’d we first meet? Should I tell her there? Should our song be playing in the background? Kenma, your himbo and over thinker tendencies are showing, just tell her already! It’d be early in the morning, and you two are making breakfast together while he’s listening to you ramble on about the recent events of your favorite show and he’s just smiling and nodding, doing his best to recall the other plot points that have happened. And you, distracted with your ranting, go to take a bite of your freshly made breakfast- which is still scalding hot. You IMMEDIATELY start panting and drop your fork, running over to the faucet and shoving your head under it doing your best to soothe your mouth with the cold water. And Kenma feels awful, but this is fucking hilarious. So sure he’s holding your hair back so you can really get that water but he’s dying in the process. Almost keeled over and gripping at his stomach type laughter and you’re swatting at him to no avail and he just can’t help himself, “oh, fuck I love you.” He said it between his gasps of air from laughing and didn’t even realize it. Not until you stood up fully with water still dripping off your chin just looking at him. This idiot immediately started apologizing like omg this isn’t how I wanted to say it ahhhh but you assure him this was perfect, and that you love him too (pls love this man he can’t help but love you too)

11. Easily - Bruno Major: does this count as angst? ok call back to Kenma being an overthinker who overworks himself and probably overlooks his own needs at times, there’s bound to be some tension between you two at times. You’re concerned about his health and he insists he’s fine but you know he’s not, and while I don’t ever see him blowing up on you I could see little arguments about his self-care habits. Sometimes he stays up too late, or he’s stressing himself over something that doesn’t need that much thought! Regardless, he knows you just love him and he does the same thing for you and he just needs to get better at not being so stubborn when it comes to taking care of himself. And he just hopes that you know he loves you and appreciates what you do for him even though it doesn’t seem like it all the time, and that hopefully you won’t give up on him.

12. Streets - Doja Cat: ok I added this one mainly for the vibes but like you can’t tell me Kenma isn’t pined over in university LMAO. Like he’s pretty and polite but also indifferent, mentally ill bitches eat that shit UP; and there’s PLENTY of those in university LMAO. And like you aren’t a toxic possessive person don’t worry but MAN he’s fighting these girls off with a stick at this point LMAO and he just doesn’t get it pls, like he’d definitely be the partner in an assignment who just comes prepared and is kind of quiet to a fault but is so nice and just gets his shit done. Would also offer a pencil if you forgot one and maybe I’m just a whore but that gets me everytime 😌

13. Kiss U Right Now - Duckwrth: ok mainly for the vibes but !!! You and Kenma in the kitchen cooking and this song comes on and he comes up behind you and turns you around and your faces are all close and he keeps singing “I think I wanna kiss u” and smirking but he’s just ghosting his lips over yours instead and moving his head back every time you try to kiss him and giggling before doing it all over again! giggly Kenma supremacy

14. Butterfly - UMI: ok we been talking about how much Kenma would be devoted to you, but like you wouldn’t be the same!!!! Kenma means so much to you and you do your best to show your care and all you wanna do is see him happy as much as he wants the same for you, omg you guys are so in love it’s gross 🤢

15. Pick Up Your Phone - Hojean: what more can I say!!! You guys just love each other and love spending as much time together as you can!! (I like ending these playlists with a really happy mood :) )

——————

Here it is! Thank you for being so patient and I really hope you like this! I always get nervous posting for my baby’s 🖤 love you cutie!

-🐇out

#haikyuu headcanons #haikyu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyu requests #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu playlist #haikyuu hcs #haikyuu kenma #kenma x y/n #kenma x you #kenma hcs #kenma kuzome #kozume kenma #kenma x reader #kenma playlist

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