#i think about this a lot as a trans man
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gay-otlc · 1 year ago
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The people who think gay trans man have straight privilege because they have the "option" to "escape" homophobia and live as straight women are blatantly disregarding the fact that for a lot of trans people, the options aren't "gay trans man" or "cis straight woman." It's "gay trans man" or "dead."
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kedreeva · 25 days ago
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Hi friends!
I recently saw the cover of this book posted to a group on FB, with a LOT of vitriol aimed at it there. I ambled over to the Amazon page to see it (and have a look through the reviews) and it's LARGELY reviews by bigots (as I suspected it would be). I just spent half an hour going down the list reporting inauthentic and/or hateful and/or off-topic (not about the product) reviews, and ticking the "helpful" box on the 5-star kind reviews (and as a warning, not all the 5 stars ARE kind, I saw at least one that was vitriolic sarcasm).
If you have a few spare minutes and an amazon account, it would be nice, I think, if you could pop over and select "helpful" for the kinder reviews. I don't think reporting the bad ones a second time will be helpful (it may just slog the queue down), but boosting the positive reviews to appear toward the top of the list may be. If you have purchased/read/otherwise own or will own this book now, feel free to leave an authentic review of it. Be kind, do not get yourself in trouble trying to be mean to other reviews. The point is to add some support to the page that will actually stick around.
Here's the link!
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katabay · 6 months ago
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”—ah. seems like mother goose has been playing around in your egg salad. if you won’t dance to that tune, I got others.”
honestly, the would you kindly scene is whatever to me*, code yellow is the more interesting violation/betrayal of the body because of how beautifully it escalates the Fontaine reveal/betrayal and shows how ugly some of those ‘locks and keys’ that Tenenbaum mentions are. not only have you been a tool in another man’s hand this entire time, it goes deeper. your body is not your own.
*there used to be a meandering thought here about the would you kindly scene, but it was really just talking around the fact that I spent way too many years seeing people discuss it in the most insufferable and reductive ways possible when it’s a combination of three or four other things that make that moment compelling lmao
collage credits: heart one/heart two
⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!
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turtleblogatlast · 6 months ago
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[ cw: slight questioning of gender identity / ]
Leo learning he’s trans and having various reactions to it.
1) Uncaring - not like anything really changed? It’s like learning your blood type. Leo is Leo, that’s all.
2) Existential - how the heck did he miss this for so long??? Wait is this gonna change his perspective of gender for himself or is he overthinking things??? He’s comfortable in his own skin and all but what if he’s not, actually? Should he think about this harder? Are there other things about himself he doesn’t know of yet-?
3) Peeved - what do you mean he could have had sick long claws and a cool long tail?
4) Relieved - WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE COULD HAVE LOST HIS STRIPES???
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year ago
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Important tip for trans men/transmascs/whoever needs the reminder: Even if you pass as a man to cis people, you still need to have either some form of self-protection on you (e.g., mace, knives (if you can use them effectively), ect.) or know some form of self-defense. Please take it from me, you don't know what will happen out there at any given time.
You might assume that if you pass as a cis man to cis people, you will be safe from any harm. While I wish that were true, it simply isn't the world most of us live in. Please do whatever you can to protect yourself out there.
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screechingfromthevoid · 4 months ago
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I think Dorian knows Orym is in love with him. I don't think it is a great unknown. He's not biting his nails wondering if Orym feels the same way as him.
I think the problem is that Dorian doesn't know how to approach it at all. For so many reasons. There are so many reasons why Dorian has been keeping all of this close to his chest.
First and foremost I think he wants to be respectful of Will and the place he holds in Orym's heart. Dorian in no way would blame Orym for never moving on. He'd be sad and disappointed but he'd understand. And he understands that he's still mourning Will. So he doesn't want to initiate something Orym isn't ready for.
Second, they're in the middle of a war. There isn't time for this. There isn't time for dead brothers and profound crushes. How could he distract Orym from the world ending? He's their little tank. He's their tactician. He's can get his hard and throw it back just as easily. They need his head clear. And I don't think Dorian would ever forgive himself if something were to happen because Orym was too preoccupied.
Third, is speculative, with the context Robbie has given us, marrying a man would not go over well in the royal family. Not because they're particularly homophobic. But, assuming they're both cis, (headcanons aside, I don't think critical role is there yet), the blood line would end. And royal families are big on lines of succession. Hence Zeru begging Dorian to come back. So I'm not sure adopting is in the realm of possibilities. How could Dorian let Orym love him? How could he give into his feelings? How could they live happily ever after when Dorian needs to go back home? Sit on a throne? Produce an heir and a spare? He couldn't possibly start something with him only for it to end in tragedy. He couldn't do that to Oym.
There are probably more reasons for all this but these are the ones that swim in my head the most. And idk I think Dorian wants to love Orym loudly and proudly but... The world is ending, ya know?
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shadowhaert · 6 months ago
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in remembrance of all deceased transgender individuals who have been misgendered through paleontology
trans liberation does not stop with death insp by @sweatermuppet
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alongtidesoflight · 2 months ago
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so here's my honest thoughts on dragon age: the veilguard, after ~40 hours of playing. i finished the main quest after having finished all companion quests and major faction quests. just to clear up what content i saw, i played as an elven transmasc rook who is a member of the lords of fortune. he romanced lucanis (although after finishing the game i'm now leaning towards taash). i don't know what's happening in playthroughs that have a different race, gender identity, romance or faction going on.
full spoilers ahead, i mean it. don't read further if you want to avoid them. i don't want complaining about it in my asks.
oh and also, if you're worried because of a few negative reviews online i can comfort you by saying don't give a fuck about a certain big name youtuber who is very much tied to bethesda franchises giving this a negative review. i'll explain why.
i'm starting off with the things i liked
the game looks really pretty. i was worried it wouldn't feel like thedas anymore (with them trying to "focus on northern thedas only" i thought they'd make a clear cut in environmental design. they do and they don't. it's complicated. i'll elaborate on it when talking about the negative stuff). anyway it does. minrathous feels like kirkwall. treviso enchanted me like the winter palace did. the hossberg wetlands reminded me of the hinterlands and a couple other inquisition maps. arlathan looked like... arlathan. the crossroads were different, but familiar. overall i like the way it looks and feels. it's thedas, with a twist. it's a good one, and gives everything a solid but unique feel.
combat is top tier. if you're a hardcore dragon age player you WILL miss the tactical aspect of it for a bit, but i promise you, once you're used to the way the combat works, you will be lapping that shit up. and once you get to ability combos you'll mourn the control you used to have over your companions in battle a bit less
the MAIN quest and its story. i expected worse, way worse. and for a while the game even had me tricked (harr harr you'll get it in a second) it is Really That Much Worse. but holy shit was it good. i walked away satisfied ngl.
your choices have SOLID weight. there's consequences, good AND bad. i got minrathous blighted, ruled over by venatori, and the leader of the shadow dragons ultimately died because of my decisions. i made those at the beginning and throughout the game. he died at the end. DAVRIN died because i didn't expect what i was saying to have that much weight. i thought i was in the clear. he had hero status. well turns out, your choices can still get your companions killed even if you do everything right. i fucking love him. he shouldn't have made that sacrifice just because i told him to do everything it takes once.
the inquisitor, morrigan and dorian being there, surprisingly. there's also negatives to this though, see below.
speaking of companions dying and the inquisitor playing a bigger role: the final quest feels like me2's suicide mission. i was blown away by it and the fact that i got to see the results of all my efforts playing out in front of me.
bioware are NOT trying to redeem solas. they love him as a character yes, but i wasn't forced to see any good in him. he betrays you. he fucked my rook over twice. he fucked him over right back, for good this time (the veil wasn't torn down, i anchored it by binding him to it, he's doomed to uphold it). but solas really lives up to his name as the trickster elven god. rip to all the people who grew really attached to him over the years.
varric died. if you like him that's probably as hard reading it as it was watching it. varric died and the game lies about it until the very end. when the realisation hits, it hurts. but in the very best way.
the amount of care they put into gender expression and trans identities this time around. (i'll add onto this with negative points as well too).
rook feels very much ingrained in the world of thedas. he doesn't ask questions that expose the player to lore through dialogue as if he's stepped foot into thedas for the first time. those conversations feel very solid and good. i hope other faction players got as much joy out of this as i did.
and the things i didn't like and boy there's a lot unfortunately
the music. let's just get that out of the way holy shit. it doesn't feel like it belongs in this universe. it gets so incredibly sci-fi-y at times you'd think it's taken straight from mass effect andromeda. there's not a single song unique to veilguard that i really enjoyed. it broke my immersion, real bad. hearing a busker play the tavern songs from inquisition on a lute right after i killed some venatori with wobbly bass songs playing in the background is just odd. weird tonal shift. don't like it. it's made for people who like flashy light-weight cinema.
tevinter nights is required reading. the podcasts are required listening exercises. the game is so fast paced, especially at the start, that there's no time to introduce you to characters and how much weight their names carry in-game. i would not have known who half these people are if i hadn't skimmed over tevinter nights. i'd care even less about them than i already did. there is no time to get properly attached to them. people will act as if you're talking to a legend personified and you'll be thinking man goddamn which chapter of tevinter night were they in again and what did they do???
there's a weird mismatch with the animations. you'll have beautifully fluid ones, like emmrich casting spells. and then you'll have rook's face animating in the most unnatural manner that's sorta reminiscent of mass effect andromeda's "my face is tired" addison, when their emotions SHOULD be landing with the player rn instead.
i'm not vibing with the art style. sometimes it works. most of the time it doesn't. at points i felt like i was watching tangled.
that also brings me to some of the dialogue. same issue. i am watching frozen. i am watching tangled. someone on the writer's team really likes the adorkable trope. bellara is its victim.
for all the talk about identity, bioware sure doesn't like theirs. the grey warden armor got a redesign again and it just makes them look like a generic army. i hate it lol
in general, i don't like the armor design. the wardrobe/appearances system is fine, but it's just not helping if all the armors are just... kinda bland or downight bad looking? and don't get me started on the lords of fortune armor. that is orientalism personified.
the world states should have been carried over, full stop. i know they said they didn't because they want to separate what happens in the north from what happens in the south, which... i could have lived with that. but the inquisitor sends you letters that keep you up to date on... the south of thedas. you learn that there's a blight again, that people are standing strong but it's difficult, denerim's fallen, the rulers are taking care of it, orlais is fighting and they're successful for a while, etc etc. what's good bioware. i thought we don't care about the south this time around. why are you feeding me so much boring generic information. if you're not gonna show any of it and just write letters, then carrying the world state over should not have been an issue. i have a game dev background. those few lines of code would not have broken your budget or pushed your engine's limits. fuck right off.
this gripe of mine carries over to all the cameos. as a lord of fortune you have to deal with isabela a lot. it's fun. i missed her. you get to go drinking with her and taash and bellara! also my hawke romanced her. she's not mentioned once. they had the opportunity to put a sentence or two about her in there with not a lot of effort, trust me.
when varric dies, all she has is a single line about it. for gold, for fortune, for varric. she only says it if you interact with her on your way to the final push. that's not mandatory.
morrigan is there. kieran isn't. the old god soul that mythal and then solas absorbed? who cares at this point, the gods are dead now and solas is locked away for eternity. i suppose? why is morrigan there. she feels unneeded. i wish they'd just left her down south, at least that way i wouldn't have had to witness her god awful redesign.
dorian at least feels as if he belongs in this story. the shadow dragons are a crucial part to protecting minrathous. he's also weirdly underutilised. isabela and morrigan had more lines than him in my playthrough.
on the topic of romance: bro that was underwhelming. no, genuinely. you know when romance picked up a bit? after the point of no return. i heard maybe two lines of companion banter about it before that. maybe i missed something which i honestly doubt, but romance did not play much of a role in lucanis's storyline. i saved his grandmother as he wished me to (and if you read tevinter nights you know she was rather abusive and their relationship not the healthiest) and told him to focus on his family. a reunified family my rook wasn't even introduced to as a partner at the end of all that.
really, do not buy this game if you're only in it for the romances. others might be better, lucanis's basically gave me nothing. except for an outing (the second coffee date i had with him, it was getting repetitive) all of it played out once i committed to the final quest. the sex scene was a fade to black. annoyingly right after davrin died. if you're looking for well paced and good spice, pick up something else. the sweet talk and the final goodbye were nice though.
for all the good the ever-presence of gender identity does, it is brought up in such a disruptive manner too. it doesn't even play out naturally if you CHOOSE the lines that are meant to be said. hearing the words trans and non-binary in this setting doesn't feel right, and i'm saying this as a trans guy. i think it could have been handled more gracefully. the amount of times my rook went "i'm a MAN" as if he's about to start drumming on his chest and roaring any second now got super nerve-grating. "i'm so glad you're into me... the me who is trans. remember?" just. tell me one trans person who'd talk like that to a person they've grown close with and are trying to romance. this game doesn't handle sexuality well, so all this hey my body might not look like the way you're expecting it to look talk amounts to nothing anyway. i feel about this the way i feel about krem: this is partial exposition to trans experiences... packaged up for cis consumption. the ONLY exception to that is interacting with taash. holy shit was all of that heartwarming and bro did it feel good and natural to talk to them about theirs and rook's gender.
rivain and nevarra are new locations added by veilguard. they're also incredibly underwhelming, small and constricted maps. rivain is a coastline with a few ruins. the hall of valor is a partial ruin nestled into a cave on a beach, with a fighting pit. isabela is there in her skimpy outfit commentating your pit fights. that's it. i'm sorry if you were looking for a bustling pirate cove or whatever. you're not gonna get it. the nevarran crypts btw are a long ass dungeon crawl. that's it.
speaking of maps. i thought people were being dramatic when they said you're gonna be fighting the same enemies on them again and again. i thought they were figure of speeching it. they're not. you WILL fight the same amount of enemies. in the same spot. every time you reload the map. best to stay on a map and clear out the enemies and do as much questing on that map as you can before leaving, because you WILL have to do it all over again once you return.
the three choices i made for my inquisitor didn't matter lol she didn't have to face solas and therefore couldn't stop him at any cost as she had sworn (maybe because my rook tricked solas into binding himself to the veil, there was also an option to fight him. would she have stepped in? who knows). blackwall wasn't mentioned. and either her using a small amount of her forces in the final fight was the reason the civilians of minrathous fared so well..... or it just didn't matter. ultimately i think she had very little impact on anything
#datv#datv spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard#oh wow i hit a limit typing this#anyway to tie this up a bit: the good and bad to the environmental design being that well-known architecture like minrathous and dwarven#ruins look fire and remind me a lot of the previous games#but newly added locations are very... generic... very bland#i was very excited for rivain. i thought we'd get to see ships. not a bunch of ruins and a fighting pit and that's it#and why did i say to ignore a certain guy's review? bro because he was complaining about taash being ace and that taking up their screentim#and them being too up in your face about their identity. he did all this while she/her'ing them constantly#but my man they're trans. nb. not ace.#y'all need to be careful about bad reviews. they're coming from people who are upset about gender identity being handled as a topic in this#game. meanwhile they have no clue what they're even talking about. i don't think matty knows the difference between ace and trans#and neither do the hundreds of people who are one star rating this game currently#i liked this game. it's not top tier. it's not something i'll sink hours and hours and hours of my life into#it has tonal issues and it's moving away from what made dragon age stand out for me#but i do think that it's a genuinely fun play and people who are very invested in dragon age will squeeze joy out of it wherever they can#i had a hard time warming up to the new characters (taash and lucanis being the exception because they have an older bioware air about them#but solas's and varric's story (and don't get me wrong that's what veilguard is about) is GOOD. that is how bioware used to be.#and i wish they'd given us that energy all over the game. that direness. that grit. serious and mature writing.#that consistency is lacking#and whether you're gonna enjoy this game or not is entirely dependant on what you came here for and how well the game delivers on it#i think their weakest points are ironically the thing they advertised the most: the new companions and their writing#you won't find nuanced and good enemies here (i already reblogged something about this. you can go scroll around a bit and catch up on that#really the only thing that had me super invested and emotional was the main quest.#so make of that what you will. ultimately i was more frustrated with the game than i got enjoyment out of it. i was close to just put it#aside for now... until i went to minrathous to end ghila'nain's and elgar'nan's ritual. that all blew me away. still on a high off of it.#anyway yeah that review got cut short by the character limit maybe i'll add more to it tomorrow but rn... i am heading to bed#thanks for coming to my ted talk. also i'm sorry. zevran REALLY isn't in this.#dragon age
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jovieinramshackle · 23 hours ago
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I always try to not be shy about the fact Pio does not pass as a man at all, and that he is in a situation where he cannot take the steps to do so (medically transitioning basically)— not just financially, but mentally too.
He hates his chest, his private parts and the fact they cause hin extreme dysphoria once a month from his period, his voice is audibly feminine, he even has very "soft feminine" features, he is often mistaken for a butch woman and misgendered a lot (he's also very anxious about correcting people, since he's afraid of how they'll react).
And I feel it's important from me to showcase these features, because they’re part of a realty many transmasc/guys/men like me go through.
The thing about Pio is that he has an extremely hard time believing he's a "real man". Almost everything in his life is an active reminder that society does not see him as a man, and he has internalised it. He is happy the people close to him (his father, Chris and his family) confirm they see him as a man, but he has a hard time genuinely believing they actually do, because he can't possibly say the same about himself.
He's on the verge of giving up sometimes, to detransition, to go back being [REDACTED] and be a woman again. He thinks it will make life easier. After all, it'll be easier to socialise, talk to people, and even find a partner. Pio is gay after all, but what gay man would love a "woman," right? Straight men must be his only option, right?
But it won't be easier, it will outright kill.
And this is why his relationship with Fellow is so crucial to him. For all his faults, the fox did one very important thing right in the relationship— love Pio for the man that he is.
Fellow didn't always have the right words, but he knew words weren't really gonna help such a dysphoric person like Pio. The constant and consistent love and support over time was what made Pio realise how genuine Fellow was with him.
Intimacy felt less uncomfortable, it actually became enjoyable. He could actually bare his features, even if a little. He actually grow to like his voice a little, even if he's fine with it changing. Everything just became a little easier when he was with Fellow, he could actually see himself as desirable, to an other queer man no less.
He began thinking that perhaps he is a man, regardless of everything. This reduction of his dysphoria was what made him more motivated to seek medical transition later one, as he finally could think to himself, "this isn't pointless." He realised nothing can stop him from being the man that he is.
Even after their falling out during their work in Playful Land, Pio still had this drive in him. He went back to his father and started working, slowly saving up to seek a way to get his hands on HRT. And although he has a long way to go, he is for once finally determined to do what he must do for his well being.
He kinda spiralled for a while because of the falling out. He even began relying on alcohol for a bit. But this new profound drive carried him every day and kept him alive.
So basically, as angry as he is with Fellow, he will always be grateful for all the genuine love and desire he was given. It, quite literally, saved his life.
So yeah ofc they make up in the end, what did you expect, to not give them a happy ending? Poser./j
@sunnysidesevenup @theolivetree123 tagging you two cuz...Pio Lore....heh....<3
tag list : @ramshacklerumble @thehollowwriter @summerspook @scint1llat3 @skriblee-ksk
@cyanide-latte @twistedwonderlandshenanigans @oya-oya-okay @viperbunnies @jadelover69
@twsted-void @lallopsyou (lmk/dm if you wanna be added)
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troutest · 11 days ago
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i think we should get more comfortable with GNC-ing that doesn't lead to transitioning
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bulldog-butch · 2 months ago
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i sometimes so desperately wish my gender and sexuality were more simple. i wish we weren’t trapped in a world where the binary even within transness weren’t so rigid. i wish i could just say i was trans man or that i never had had the desire to transition and could have just stayed happily as a cis butch lesbian
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stiffyck · 9 months ago
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Trans hermits. You agree.
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potatobugz · 4 months ago
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hypothetical "the rat grinders if they were bad kids and vice versa" type drawings. there are many thoughts swimming around in my brain...
was this mostly an excuse to draw gorgug in mary ann's style of outfit? maybe. am i having fun? absolutely <|:)
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cosmiado · 1 year ago
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oakworhy are sooooooo t4t trans guys to me im sorry but i cannot stay silent any longer. just think about it. Normal finding out Hermie wears his binder onstage & during musical numbers and being SHOCKED and UPSET and shows him the wonderful world of trans tape. Hermie as a little kid getting obsessed with and "method acting" as fictional boys to the point where he was insisting on getting he/himmed, and then finding a fictional girl he wanted to act as and but realizing that he still wanted to be a boy. Normal getting really into the idea of being a cheerleader and being absolutely thrilled to realize that boys are allowed to be cheerleaders too. transfem Sparrow having long talks about gender with her son and helping him come into his own, even if she's worried that he'll be made fun of for it. that one @apricior fic where Hermie helps Normal with his t shot. do you see my vision
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doomdoomofdoom · 23 days ago
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Every now and again I wonder if maybe all trans people face roughly the same amount of bigotry and one just gets more attention, but then i have to read terf posts and.
wow.
obviously every group of trans identities faces their own struggles and unique oppression but there's this incredibly vitriolic kind of hatred reserved for transfems and its sickening.
#ramble#trans#i have a lot of thoughts about terfs i wrote them down somewhere at some point but really theyre just misogyny all the way down#transmascs are poor misled little meow meows who dont realize they just have internalized misogyny. transfems are the embodyment of all evi#nonbinaries are... not talked about. because they ruin the bioessentialism if you think about it critically#to be fair any amount of critical thinking ruins bioessentialism#if gender isnt a social construct why do different societies have different versions of gender. do you never sit down and think for a momen#and like so much of the ideology is wasted hating individuals rather than the actual systems that produce them.#the sex worker thing pisses me off so much. how can you claim to protect women while you shit on the most vulnerable.#“sex work bad because no woman actually wants to do it” like even if that were true (it isnt) the problem wouldnt be sex work#the problem would be capitalism and people having to do things they dont want to make a living.#dismantle capitalism not gender neutral bathrooms#being a man isnt genetic and neither is being evil. the former at least has a genetic predisposition.#whether some people are born evil is like a massive philosophical debate on top of the socio-biological#and like. dont you have anything better to do in your feminism?#like actual problems to fight rather than someone down the street? what progress are you hoping for here?#were losing access to reproductive rights but hoo boy good thing we get to share a scapegoat with our oppressors? really?#theyre not gonna give you equal pay just because you refuse to engage with biology past the 6th grade.#actually im pretty sure we already covered some rudimentary sex/gender stuff in 6th grade but my school mightve been an outlier#definitely compared to the us school system but whatever the point stands#crimes against the gender convention#long ramble in the tags apparently#transgender#queer
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lucabyte · 2 months ago
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🐼
#@ comment directed to me in a tag. i have not talked abt them anywhere publicly but if u were deep enough in the paint in 2020ish theyre#like not super surprising. i think i wanna get back around to the trolls in my reread (so itll b a while) before i say anthing solid#just so i can go in w intent to pay closer attention again but like#overall have a low opinion on most the troll boys insofar as i see that the narrative seems to also not care for them. they seem to exist#to serve narrative purposes & end up discarded when no longer relevant. ie they dont end up very interesting and thus i view#many fans with suspicion when they have 'boys disease' ie having an outsized focus on the boys of the story despite hs being by the end#an extremely female dominated text with a lot to say about masculinity as an opressive force#tavros and gamzee are the biggest bugbears here (only really beaten out in eyebrow raising by cronus and the male dancestors)#on account of fans of them often downplaying gamzee's misogyny that is core to his role as a charismatic cult leader (or worse#sending trans women death threats when they made the factual assesment that gamzee was written to be a weird misogynist calling it#character assassination etc. man 2020 was wild.) tavros mostly just ends up being an accessory to this crime tbh. though his genuinely#complicated relationship w vriska oft being flattened to villify vriska + an inability to actually read what tavros Says...#like. if you get rid of tavros' quirk. stammering and all. and read his lines. he's kind of fucking rude? and yeah its alternia they all ar#but i have my hesitancies wrt how people seem to infantilise him (a disabled character) to the point of ignoring his dialogue and flaws#when one of tavros' core conceits (u can argue if this is . like. something hussie should have stayed out of. like its not their lane) is#that shitty ppl online will be assholes but will be allowed to get away with it due to unrelated disability. which like. it was 2010 ig#but this is hit upon again with mituna being distinctly a 4 channer with real brain damage and speech issues & all his friends letting him#get away with shit he still clearly has the cognitive capacity to know is wrong. its very messily handled but. i dont rlly like tavros ig.#will b amazed if tumblr doesnt eat these tags i went on wayy too long. but im not putting this in plaintext for obvi reasons#lucabytereads
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