#i think a lot of people refuse to accept this notion at all

[96percentdone]

I do honestly believe that all communication ever would be vastly improved if everyone on earth internalized and understood that the the whole thing is a series of back and forth interpretation of words with a collectively understood haze of potential meanings wildly dependent on context, speaker, and audience, even for even the most basic of sentences.

Like I can say "I like cats" but the degree of intensity to which i like them is just something you're inferring based on prior context (also interpreted) and how my tone is read. I could be sincere, or totally sarcastic, or maybe cat is slang for something else—miscommunication happens because everything is up for grabs, and communication is not an objective science.

It's a fast-paced guessing game played by all.

[baphometsss]

The Inquisitor's need to hear from Rook about how Solas helped them rescue the Dalish Clan is really interesting if they're Dalish, and especially so if you play as romanced Lavellan.

By his own admission in Trespasser, Solas didn't see anyone around him as true people in the beginning of DAI. In fact, he kills Felassan for refusing to help him any longer and suggesting that the modern elves deserved a chance.

It's why the Inquisitor needs to hear it from Rook, that he actually did save their lives. 'He's always thinking about where it ends.' He wants to be remembered as more than what the Dalish currently remember him as. He wants his sacrifices to mean something to the modern elves, for them to recognise the evils of the Evanuris and see that they are not worth worshipping. It stung him badly to see that his legacy was just as the great adversary, because it suggests that the elves who remained after the fall of Elvhenan did not think much of him, even after all he did for them. That one codex from the Vir Dirthara in Trespasser shows that people knew what Fen'harel did and it was viewed almost like an act of terrorism.

The fact that the Inquisitor goes on to call out Solas's prideful nature reflects that. He can't bear to be seen as truly evil because then he's as bad as his enemies, then all he did was for nothing.

He calls the Dalish 'our people' to an elven Rook, and I don't think he's lying, there. He didn't really have any reason to save the Dalish Clan. He could've let them die. He even describes saving them as a privilege, almost like he's atoning for what he did to the elves by protecting their children. Of course, he knows a lot more people will die when the veil comes down, and it doesn't make it any easier , as he says in Trespasser.

It's interesting for the Inquisitor to bring this up though, because it shows that they've been wondering if their time together in the Inquisition had any effect on him at all, if their pursuit of him over the years has changed him in any way. They're looking for tangible signs that he doubts himself, and that he actually wants his mind to be changed.

A romanced Lavellan will say that he forbade them from following him because he didn't want them to see what he would become, but that they don't believe this is the true reason. They know him better than anyone, they got closer to the real him than most. They know he doesn't really want to do it. They know he can't accept the notion that all the terrible things he's done have been for nothing. They know he's acting from a place of grief and trauma. Saving the Dalish Clan was just the proof they had been looking for.

[kabishkat19]

What really happened (Arcane)

I think I know what happened!

I’ve seen a lot of people getting confused over Silco’s relationship with the kids due to all the new flashbacks in Arcane season 2 (spoiler warning) But I think I’ve made sense of it all.

Here me out.

The main confusion stems from the flashback revealing how close Vander and Silco had been with Felicia (Vi’s mother) so much so that Vander even named Violet, but from season 1 Vi doesn’t even know Silco… here’s what I think, I think despite what many assumed Silco actually wasn’t in the kids lives; many of the flashbacks of Vi and Jinx’s younger years only showed their parents or Vander, the only time Silco is shown is when it’s from Vander’s youth.

It kind of makes sense for his character; think about it, all we see of young Silco is that even with his friends having a chill time he’s still working, writing, planning, all this man thinks about is the future independence of Zaun and of course he does he’s the brains of the whole thing; he may have seen the kids is passing but Silco was too busy to trying to secure the future he wasn’t in the present like Vander who we see become the soft loving father to these little girls who weren’t even his.

Which explains the whole Zaun revolt situation; we now know that during the battle Silco tried blowing up a enforcer but had sadly taken out Felicia and Connol (Vi’s bio dad), we know what happens Vander sees them and then sees those two little girls he loves so much cry over their dead parents; and he decides then and there that he won’t do this anymore it wasn’t worth it.

The second confusion is that people think in a rage Vander took out Silco on that bridge before seeing the girls and I don’t think that was case; my theory is way more heart breaking because I imagine after Vander put the girl’s to rest he went to find Silco who no doubt after taking his friends lives accidentally was not handling it well (sound familiar) I can see Vander trying to make Silco accept that they failed and to give up where as Silco refuses to even think of that notion; that giving up would mean all those lives lost were for nothing.

Both in grief they argue and fight; Vander blames Felicia on Silco calling him a murder while Silco calls Vander a coward and swears no matter what that he won’t stop he will never stop.

Then Vander thinks of those girls and the many other children who are now orphan because of what they did and he knows he has to stop him.

Vander drowns Silco.

And the rest is history.

Thank you for listening, thoughts are welcome.

[theplatypusblue]

I’ve been thinking about the similarities and differences between Skybound and Seabound lately, especially in their endings. The strengths/drawbacks of each, plus what each ending says about Nya and Jay’s characters.

In both seasons, Nya and Jay are forced to make really shitty decisions. In Skybound, Jay has to choose between making a wish to save Nya, or making a wish to stop Nadakhan and save Ninjago. However, rather than choosing either of those options, Jay (albeit accidentally) opts for the Secret Third Thing™ — wishing to go back in time so that none of this ever happened lol.

And while you could read this as an instance of Jays character shining through (he cares so much about Nya, he refuses to accept a future without her), I think it’s fair to say that this ending fell flat for a lot of people. It made the entire rest of the season pointless, it felt like a total cop out, you get the idea. These weakness only get more clear when you look at it in comparison with Seabound’s ending.

In Seabound, Nya has to choose between sacrificing herself to save Ninjago, or, I guess, not doing that and watching Ninjago fall. The key difference here is that there’s no Secret Third Thing™ for Nya to fall back on. This idea is made very explicit throughout the season: sometimes there are no good choices, “that’s the way the cookie crumbles” and all that. She resists this notion at first, but ultimately, she makes that hard decision. She makes the choice to sacrifice herself.

Contrast this with Jay, who basically… doesn’t make a choice at all? He just ~follows his heart~ and then… gets to have his cake and eat it too????

And it’s frustrating because there’s something interesting here, right? We get to see the differences between Jay and Nya when it comes to making those kinds of tough choices, and what that says about them as people. Push comes to shove, Nya will do what it takes to protect the world at large. She matures and grows from where she was at the beginning of the season, and the finale reflects that. On the other hand, Jay is the type for guy who will fight tooth and nail until he gets a happy ending. It’s pretty simple-minded, and it’s not something he really gets challenged on in a meaningful way, but it’s an appealing character trait in its own right.

The contrast between these two traits is pretty cool and interesting in my opinion!! Especially when you take into account that it’s Nya’s life on the line in both instances!!!! But then you gotta contend with the fact that Skybound’s ending is kinda…. mid as fuck? And it’s just like??? We were so close yknow soooooo close like this close, but no it’s all weird and stupid now I guess.

So it’s like TLDR: Jay and Nya are super interesting together, but Skybound is so damn weird that it makes the whole thing difficult.

[creature-wizard]

ngl as an abuse survivor the whole “micro trauma” thing makes me roll my eyes back into my head like that’s life babe sometimes we have a negative experience it’s not trauma 💀💀💀 i really feel like so many folks live soft lives that any negative feeling becomes “traumatic” and something to avoid. i don’t think it’s good to conflate times your ego was tested or times that didn’t go exactly your way with genuine trauma. you’re more resilient than that. (obviously this isn’t about day to day trauma living as a bipoc in a racist white society etc but i don’t think you were talking about that either)

Welp, there's a lot to unpack here.

First of all, I'm an abuse survivor with my own share of trauma. I was raised in a form of conservative apocalyptic Christianity where beatings were considered an acceptable form of punishment. Because my parents believed that parental authority was never wrong, and anything a child did or even felt that seemed to challenge that authority (whether intentional or not), I was constantly told that I was wrong for having my own feelings, punished for having my own feelings if I dared to to express them. In addition to this, my family thought I needed to be very aware that the Mark of the Beast was coming and I needed to emotionally prepare myself for beheading once the Antichrist took over and started killing anyone who refused the Mark of the Beast.

In addition to this, I was subject to all of the day-to-day trauma that comes from growing up with ADHD and autism in an ableist society, as well as the trauma that comes from growing up with ADHD and autism in an environment where people think children must be obedient at all times. (My parents believed spanking and slapping was fine, by the way. So, that happened often enough. And when it wasn't spanking or slapping, it was my mother screaming and yelling.)

Now with all of this context established, I'm going to tell you: You don't get to decide who does and doesn't get to have trauma. Trauma doesn't work according to some abstract notion of what should and shouldn't constitute "trauma." People can, in fact, be genuinely traumatized over things that seem totally ridiculous to you.

Also? You don't know what other people are living through. You don't know what goes on behind closed doors. You don't know how people are being traumatized by economic circumstances, by bullshit at the workplace, by knowing that Christofascists want to subjugate them or kill them. You don't know how many people are being slowly traumatized by partners who invalidate and mock them in countless tiny ways every day. You don't know how many people are being traumatized by thinking they should be able to meet certain expectations that they don't realize are based in ableist standards or impossible capitalist ideals.

You've also evidently never had a conversation with someone who can't figure out how they're such a mess because they "don't have a reason to be traumatized," but the more you talk to them the more it comes out that they lived a profoundly messed up life, and were profoundly mistreated in a thousand ways that they didn't even recognize as mistreatment at the time. (No, it's not normal for your mother to call you ableist slurs if you can't tend to her every whim in five seconds.)

You also say "obviously this isn’t about day to day trauma living as a bipoc in a racist white society etc but i don’t think you were talking about that either." And you know what? You wanna know what? I absolutely was, because my post was meant to be inclusive of all forms of microtrauma.

Anyway, I hope you can recognize that suffering and trauma aren't a contest, and trying to decide who does and doesn't "deserve" to have trauma based on your own personal abstract ideals and limited comprehension of their lives doesn't help anyone.

[masochist-marmot]

I hate the Naoto gender discourse

TW: transphobia, gender dysphoria, Naoto Shirogane

First of all, I think it's entirely valid to read whatever you want into fictional characters. Art is meant to be interpreted and to evoke something in the audience, and while it's useful to consider the author's intent, it's just as valid to interpret the text on its own.

In Persona 4, the intended reading is this: Naoto is and has always been a girl who wishes to be taken seriously in her male-dominated field. She confuses these feelings for identifying as a boy, and it's up to our party to set her back on the straight path and accept her role as young woman. Rise is incredibly eager to chastise this "young lady" immediately after learning about the reality, and throughout the game we are helping her to be more comfortable with being a girl. This is quite straightforwardly what the text is saying.

How many fans (me included) see the text is this: Naoto displays signs of gender dysphoria and struggles with their gender identity. Even after you have talked them out of a literal gender-affirming surgery (performed by a mad scientist, because why not make it extra scary to boot), they continue to present as a boy. During the rest of the game as well as Naoto's social link, you and your party can continue to push femininity on them. They're forced into a swimsuit contest, where they refuse to show up on the stage, and Yosuke says he knew it would happen. If you want to date Naoto, you have to pick the options where you tell them you like them as a girl, even though you get more social link points if you say their gender doesn't matter. This implies that Naoto is more comfortable with the way they present now, but feels that they have to present more feminine if they want to date you (which sounds like heteronormative bullshit to me). It's probably not difficult to see why this would make some players uncomfortable.

Now to the point of this post: There's a big (or just vocal?) portion of the fanbase that will call you media illiterate or delusional if you bring up your discomfort with how Naoto's gender was handled. And I can't stand it. As I demonstrated above, I know what the text is saying and have a problem with it. Media literacy isn't just about recognising what is being said, but also why it's being said. And Naoto's character arc displays well intentioned ignorance and heteronormative values at best, and malicious TERF-like ideology at worst. I'm inclined to believe it's the former, as the game and the series more widely don't seem to have a malicious intent behind them, although they certainly have other uncomfortable parts (I could make a very similar post about Kanji).

So why do so many people have an issue with the trans Naoto reading? Well, in games like these, players tend to form strong emotional connections to the characters. I'm guessing that for a lot of people it's important that their waifu is, well, a waifu. (I'm personally too pan to understand this and will advocate using "waifu" as a gender neutral word.) I'm sure some of it is annoyance with the notion of the interpretation contradicting with canon, which is apparently law. People feel like you're projecting something onto the text and not getting the intended meaning. Which feels like a weird point, since everyone is projecting some of their own feelings onto any text. And then there's your good old transphobia that manifests as a myriad of rationalisations (including the one about canon being law). I usually try to understand where people are coming from, but some people can't be reasoned with.

I don't have a conclusion, I just had to get this out.

TLDR; Stop bullying people who choose to view a character through a different lens than you do, and please practice your empathy and critical thinking skills.

[redux-iterum]

You got harassed for writing the redux. What? Why? It, it honestly is upsetting and saddening hearing that you got harrased over writing your own version of Warrior Cats.

Well, Tumblr was an incredibly contentious place when the Redux was in swing. I won't claim I was perfect and the best writer ever - very far from that, in fact, which is why I restarted this story - but as far as I know, my popularity did not sit well with a number of people, and I got folks yelling at me over...frankly, I don't remember what. I think I shoved a lot of that time out of my head so I don't have to deal with it in the present day. But it was enough that I was dreading my inbox towards the end of the Redux's run, because I knew someone was going to be calling me some variation of "problematic" or "-ist/phobe", or scolding me for something I didn't do.

I do recall that people were especially upset over one particular aspect of the worldbuilding, that being that any cat who was biologically male was not allowed in the nursery for the safety of the kits, and that included trans mollies. I explained why this was over and over, but Tumblr at the time did not accept any worldbuilding that wasn't 10000% inclusive and accepting of everyone at all times, and the eventual conclusion was that the Redux was homo-and-transphobic, somehow. Nevermind that I had stated god knows how many times that the Clans didn't care about orientation or gender identity except in one super specific area where actual cat behavior and biology played a massive role. Someone tossed out the notion that I was homo/transphobic, and that's what I became.

I'll state for the record again that I absolutely had issues with my writing, but at some point I also had folks acting like I myself was a monster who couldn't handle criticism. I have no idea where that came from - I've always made a point of staying polite and calm with everyone in every level of hostility on their end, and I stayed out of the Redux's tag to avoid seeing anything that could potentially upset me and stir me to make a comment. I still remember someone telling me to "look at what everyone has been telling you", and I had no idea what they were talking about (because, again, I stayed out of the tag), and they refused to explain themselves to me. Criticism I always welcomed; even if I didn't agree with it, I made sure to always thank the person for their input. Maybe I told someone I didn't agree or I just didn't respond to them, I don't know. Something started that notion of "Dullard can't handle criticism" up.

It was a lot of shit like that, basically. I ended the Redux because I had no more joy in the creation of it thanks to the neverending harshness I was receiving, and even when it stopped and I explained what I'd had in mind, people were STILL giving me a hard time about some of the writing decisions. I was dreading the living hell out of Iterum's reception as a result. Luckily for me, people have almost entirely been giving nothing but praise to this version. It helps that I have someone with me who can tell me when a piece of writing is bad or how I should address this idea or that notion. Editors are invaluable, folks!

[meowzilla93]

So I’ve seen so much ragging on Baxter calling himself a rebel or a bad boy, and it hurts me! ( I know most of it is in jest, its okay!) But I wanted to explain how he really IS what he claims to be, even though may just seem like a privileged individual

(I really had to reduce this from an essay to fit tumblrs character limit, I am talking like a 2k word essay, so its condensed but covers my points lol also please keep in mind I have taken canon information and given my interpretation of the information to this)

Lets look at the definition of a Bad Bay archetype – a cultural archetype often defined as a male who behaves badly, especially within societal norms. Qualities associated with this archetype is confidence, independence and/or assertiveness (though there are the negative connotations such as manipulation, dishonesty or a lack of consideration for others, but we are not focusing on those as these do not reflect Baxter)

And what is a rebel? At its core, it is a person who resist any authority, control, or tradition. Rebels like to change up the status quo, refusing to conform to societal pressures and controlling figures.

So lets look at Baxter Alexander Ward’s life:

Brought up in wealth

Was sheltered and raised with certain values

Parents were controlling and dictated a lot of his life

Was never treated like a child, but as an adult his whole life

More than likely taught to think himself above everyone (which he confirms)

Raised with very bigoted, misogynistic, homophobic and just cruel morals and notions  

If we look at those specific points, where does the Bad Boy archetype fit first?

By the time he reaches 19 years of age, he wants to be able to make connections outside of the circle of money he was raised in

Though he keeps up appearances for his parents, he tends to thumb his parents way of life, not wanting to become the same type of people they are

Rather than endorse their way of thinking, he becomes more open and accepting

(this boy might have mighty expectations for himself, but for others, he will never expect more than they can provide)

He is the very thing his parents do no approve off; Pansexual, accepting of others, opposite to what they want

By the time he is 19 years old, he is already snubbing his parents and their values, wanting to move outside of their circle of life and live his own life. There is the understanding that he was already sleeping around in high school, and considering his partners would be of all genders, the rumors circulating him would affect the image of the family, which his parents would not approve off. His visual looks, moving heavily into the black/ white monochrome and more alternative fit outside the expectations of what his family would expect of him. He dresses as he pleases, not as someone else would want him to.

These may seem like little actions, little acts of rebelling against his family, but these are MASSIVE in the context of his life. To flip the entire narrative that he learnt from his parents, and continues to do so in every way that he is able to. Sure, he gets a fake ID to just get a car to sight see in and get booze for himself to drink when out for dinner or even at home. But these acts are against what his parents expect or event want of him, what their social circle would expect of him, and as such, he fits the Bad Boy narrative within THAT social circle. And that is what matters in this context.

So, of course, this feeds into the rebel label. Going against everything he was taught, becoming the opposite person his parents expected of him. Resisting the control that his parents try and enforce on him and finding ways to escape the grip of expectation. I repeat myself a lot here but its that constant push back on what his parents expected of him, the morals, the views, the way he should handle himself and what they wanted of him. Baxter's rebellion is deep,y rooted in a sincere desire for authenticity, change and self-discovery, making him a truly compelling character.

Baxter at 19 years old was the Bad Boy Rebel of his families social circle. From the outside he just seems like a typical rich kid that was a bit strange, but from the inside, that’s where the rebelling sat.

Baxter at 24 is the man that continued in that path of rebellion. He further cut himself away from what his parents wanted, stood on his own two feet and tried to become the type of person he could be proud of. He separated himself from their morals, their visions, their actions. His mother who held charities to make connections and get a tax kick back? He does it to actually help people and does it almost pro-bono, no expectation to gain anything further from it. His father who holds a franchise and makes money from others manual labor? He takes the labor from others and takes it on himself to ensure that the day that they have (be it wedding or birthday or another event entirely) goes swimmingly and they have less stress than where they started.

Baxter continues to be a Rebel and Bad Boy as he grows and matures, as he continues to shun the way he grew up and becomes a better person for it.

There are probably other key points I have missed, but these are the ones that stood out to me, cementing the idea that Baxter Alexander Ward is a through and through

Rebellious Bad Boy

Thank you for coming to my (slightly unhinged) TED (tumblr) Talk.

[perfectlyvalid49]

Hey! Thanks for the feedback and think there’s a lot of validity in what you’re saying. I think my frustration is that even within the “3%” minority, that applies to most things given how diverse human experience is. Trans/Intersex people, various disabilities/genetic “defects” (re: Type 1 Diabetes, anemia, etc) are probably around the same percentage and still LARGELY matter. Same applies to other Native people’s who have also experienced genocide.

I largely push back on the notion that “no Jews exist in the surrounding countries of Israel” given that:

A) Kurds exist and are a part of the Semitic diaspora

B) that’s like saying that no queer people exist in North Korea because they’ve systematically attempted to kill everyone who “looks gay”. People (ESPECIALLY the Jewish spirit) exist everywhere because

C) I have a Jewish friend who is adopted from China which is a WILD set of identities to fathom existing simultaneously but I promise you there’s a lot of power in solidarity

My biggest Christicism (this was a typo but I’m keeping it because I think it’s funny lololol) of the Abrahamic faiths is the rigidity of structure and lack of intercommunication between faiths because it all seems extremely isolating which, fine, but there is something weirdly healing about more henotheistic beliefs which feel just as empowering. I think that’s why Kabbalah is so appealing

Please correct me if I’m wrong, but from scrolling through your blog, it seems that you are not Jewish. If you are not part of the community, then you can only be coming at this from an outsider’s perspective.

To discuss the 3% thing (no idea why you felt the need to put it in quotes) – In the US, the Native American population is about 3% of the total. You hear a lot more about Native American struggles in the US (still not enough) than you would in England. Similarly, that 3% of non-Western Jewish voices are heard more inside of the Jewish community than outside of it. If you want them heard outside of the Jewish community, you might start by advocating for goyim to listen to Jews at all.

Your pushback is full of shit given that I didn’t say that “no Jews exist in the surrounding countries of Israel” (don’t put it in quotes if you’re not quoting buddy, I refuse to be your strawman) I said “there are many countries in the world with 0 Jews (several of them share borders with Israel)” and also:

A) Most Kurds are not Jewish. They don’t identify as Jewish, and Jews don’t identify them (as a group, not individuals) as Jewish. Most Kurds are Muslim. There is no such thing as a Semitic people, only Semitic languages, and if you’re counting all speakers of Semitic languages as Jewish, then all speakers of Arabic would be Jewish, an assertion that I feel they would object to. You trying to make people Jewish because they’re “Semitic” is at best a sign that you don’t know what you’re talking about and at worst a sign that I’m about to hear some antisemitic nonsense.

B) You can’t be Jewish just because you have “the Jewish spirit.” Judaism is a semi-closed religion, so to be Jewish you either have to be born to Jews, or you have to convert, a process that can require months to years of study, and cannot be finalized without the presence of other Jews. You could argue that there are people who would convert if given the opportunity everywhere, but they are not Jews until the conversion process is complete. And we have census data from these countries saying that there are no Jews. There are no Jews in Jordan, Syria, Libya, Sudan, Afghanistan, Oman or Saudi Arabia. There are fewer than 50 in Lebanon, Iraq, Algeria, Egypt, or Yemen.

C) Chinese Jewish is actually not that weird of a combination. There were Jews in China hundreds of years ago that got there on the silk road, and there were Jews in China in the 1940s because of basically one heroic bureaucrat that was approving visas to move there for Jews escaping Europe at a time when no other country was accepting them. There are more Jews today in China than there are in all of the countries I listed in the last paragraph combined. I’m not sure what that has to do with the lack of Jews outside of Israel in the middle east though.

As I mentioned above, Judaism is a semi-closed religion, and Kabbalah is restricted practice even within Judaism. If you are not Jewish, then you need to stay away from Kabbalah. Interacting with it is cultural appropriation of the highest order and as disgusting as putting on black face, or putting some feathers in your hair and dancing around and claiming that you’re doing a Native American ritual.

[sir-adamus]

https://www.tumblr.com/sir-adamus/752028412918530048/so-much-of-the-hatred-rwby-gets-seems-to-be-rooted

I frankly think it's more because it's an initially amateur production that became far more successful than people ever expected it to be, or believed it ever deserved to be, and that grinds the gears of some people who fancy themselves as gatekeepers of what is and isn't "good" in the indie or mainstream area of media.

It's also frankly this thing that makes me scoff at times at the notion of Indie media becoming more valued and "accepted", because I think there is a giant caveat to all of it, fineprint in the contract so to speak. I noted this in a different anon comment I made in response to a different tumblr blog, but I'll repost it here:

People have just become downright cutthroat about indie media, and it feels like it stems from how the online space and fandoms tend to act A LOT like the corporations they despise, but from a mob mentality sort of way and without the systemic power of out of touch executives to back it up. They outwardly praise unique stories and ideas, but in reality are just as pro-conformity and pro-mass appeal and sanitization as the corporations they hate, and if you step out of line in some arcane or unclearly defined fashion that only exists in their minds, you can literally go from hero to hated in pretty much the flip of a switch. Mixed together with the increasingly puritanical way people treat media, like it's some kind of extension of their own morality and thus they have some inherent need or right to tear down anyone or anything they see as "problematic"...and yeah. It's honestly jarring as hell and really just reinforces how fickle and hypocritical the online space can be despite proclaiming to hate it when the corporations do it to them.

And that's what is really the rub about RWBY at times; it's something that looks like it's intended to "fit" into the shallow expectations of an anime made by amateurs, but ends up being a lot more complicated and requiring more nuance to actually get, and people just refuse to meet it on its own terms because they view themselves as the arbiters. The judge, jury and executioner.

Ironic really, given how much they've done everything in their power to constantly insist up and down about how much better and less behind the times they are compared to the "normies" and "establishment", and yet this attitude betrays how they're basically still the same at their core.

oh yeah

[klanceyuri]

let it really sink in

summary: he just wants to help now because he could nothing then

tags: self-esteem issues, canon compliant, ambiguous relationship

authors note: so yeagh thinking about them, A Lot, they mean so much to me

"Just open up and say 'ah,' it'll be over before you know it," Soul said.

"I'm not letting my Weapon spoon feed like I'm a baby," Maka said, a bit of a snap to her voice.

Pathetic.

She got hurt to the point that her Weapon is offering to spoon feed her- in front of a crowd of people no less. It's just so demeaning.

Soul rolled his eyes, "C'mon, you need to eat to heal."

Maka flopped back against the pillows in spite of the partial paralytics, "I refuse to let you belittle me like this."

Soul blanked, "Belittle? I'm just trying to help you out."

"How would you feel if I tried to spoon food into your mouth?" Maka asked.

The bickering didn't really subside until Black Star and Tsubaki had left, Kid and the twins followed suit. What could they add to the discussion anyways. The spite between a Weapon and a Meister are personal things for them to work out.

Soul is still trying to convince Maka to just stop fighting and accept the help.

She still isn't having it.

"Why won't you let me help you!?" The small cup of fruit is tossed to the floor when Soul hits the breaking point.

Maka didn't expect that response.

"I'm just trying to make sure you're healing properly and not starving and-" He cuts himself short.

"Soul-"

"No, it's whatever. It's cool. I'll go."

"Soul Eater Evans."

Soul froze up, "Yes, Maka?"

"You can feed me, if it'll get you out of this funk," Maka offered.

"Well I just tossed the fruit cup to the god damn floor." Soul thrust a hand in gesture to the splattered fruit chunks.

"Sit with me."

Soul heels to her offer without even realizing it. His arms are crossed and he's sitting at the edge of the bed.

"You've never tried to feed me when I got hurt before," Maka started with, "What happened?"

Soul doesn't speak.

"Soul."

"I couldn't help you. I didn't protect you. I'm supposed to be ready to die for you. I should've taken the fucking hit."

"It's fine, we didn't know it'd paralyze me," Maka said.

"It's not fine!" He's baring his teeth like a dog, "Just let me help you."

Maka paused, "Mishaps happen on the battlefield all the time."

"A mishap shouldn't leave you paralyzed from the neck down," Soul snapped.

He dropped onto his side, curled against Maka just a bit. Hell, if she got hit again he could've lost her. That'd get him revoked from being a Weapon, a failure who couldn't even keep his Meister from dying. His best friend, from dying.

He listens intently for her to speak, the steady thrum of her heartbeat ringing in his ears. He could've lost that, could've watched it end in an instant. Could've felt his Soul be severed from hers within seconds of an impact, felt as presence became absence.

It's a horrifying notion.

Ninety nine human Souls and a cat Soul, and then he'd have to start it all over again with someone new. Someone who wouldn't be able to wield him with the same prowess, who wouldn't be able to resonate with him the same. Someone different, someone that isn't his fucking Meister.

That's not gonna happen.

That'll never fucking happen.

He won't let it, he can't let it-

"Soul, can you stop gripping my hip?" Maka asked.

Oh.

He didn't, he didn't even notice it.

He retracts himself from her entirely, "Sorry."

"It's fine, just felt weird because you were gripping it too tight." Maka answered with. She would reach out to give him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, but all that her reflex is greeted with is a sharp sensation shooting through arm.

"I can leave you alone if you want me too," Soul offered.

"Why would I want you to leave?" Maka asked.

"I'm being a nuisance, first I try to spoon feed you, then I hold you to tight, and I'm just being a clingy bastard."

"Why are men like this?" It's an utterance that doesn't go unnoticed but Soul doesn't say anything in response.

He lays himself across Maka's shins instead, it's nice to just be close. That's his Meister, sure she can't hold him right now. But just being beside her, next to her, able to try and protect her even if it's just with his human body, is nice.

It's his fucking job.

A Meister's life will always come before a Weapon's life.

"I am kind of hungry," Maka said.

Soul perked up.

"Could you get me some food?"

Like a dog, Soul does exactly as asked.

-/-/-/-

He spends the rest of the day doing as asked, even if demeaning it is nice. To be of use. To not be a failure. An unneeded assurance that he's actually good at being a Weapon, at being something intended to be used.

He's submissive, yes.

But submissive in the way a dog is submissive to the sheep it kills wolves for.

A submission that was earned and offered all at once.

Still, in spite of that he finds himself resting at Maka's feet like an obedient dog. He let's himself be a space heater, even if the heat he gives off is beyond minimal.

"Soul," Maka starts with.

Soul shoots up.

"Stop acting like a mutt," Maka said.

"I'm not acting like a mutt! I'm just being a good partner," Soul said firmly, although he was vaguely aware of the fact he was acting very much like a mutt. Not that he didn't like it. He did enjoy being useful.

"Sure you aren't," Maka teased, "Can you get me some water?"

Soul slung himself off the bed and faltered at the desk beside her bed, "You trust me enough to not spill water all over you if you drink from a cup?"

"Isn't that your cup?"

"Yeah, but tap tastes better than bottled- nobodies gonna see and nobodies gonna care."

"Yeah I want cup."

"Cool."

Soul brought the rim of the cup to her lips and slowly tilted. Bottled water is so much easier to not spill. But it's whatever, it's what Maka asked of him. So he'll oblige to her request.

He retracts when she bites on the edge.

"That looked like it hurt."

"It did, thank god this paralytic will wear off sooner than later."

Soul nodded, "Agreed. Anything else I can do for ya?"

"No."

"Cool, I'm gonna try and conk out then."

Soul places the glass on the desk before splaying himself flat across Maka on his stomach. His hands lay, fingers twined, at the base of her ribs, head tilted to the side where it rests.

"You're gonna sleep on top of me?" Maka asked.

"Yep, got any issues with it?" Soul asked back, grinning up at her the whole while.

"It's fine," Maka said. A wash of pins and needles shot through her arms as she tried to raise them. Stupid paralytic.

He lets himself rest up against her again, "Thanks."

[sleepingpopplio]

Toga and her happy ending

I think after taking some time to process the latest chapter I can finally verbalize what feels wrong about it. First, I think it’s really good to be hopeful that Toga isnt dead, but I also feel like a lot of the fandom right now is trying to not think about Toga being dead because if she truly is then they might end up like how I’m feeling. So, let’s just say hypothetically she is like truly, really dead without a shadow of doubt. 

Now, The first Issue I see with this writing is that it arguably goes against the themes of the story. In order to make a better society, our heroes need to be able to win AND save (hehe Bakugo and Deku at the core of the story once again). Otherwise, saving the league would feel hollow. So, Ochako DID win the fight between her and Toga by talking toga down from the edge and bringing out the goodness in her. But did she save her? 

I would argue no. 

Toga may be able to go out “her way”, but she still ends up dying before taking any further steps to heal and find her place as her authentic self within society. Ochako thinks she has a cute smile, but will everyone else? We are stripped of the negotiation process to get Toga the proper help she needs instead of throwing her in jail. We are deprived of Ochako standing up for her and helping her finally be the happy schoolgirl Toga always wanted to be, without the mask this time. We, the audience, are denied of seeing toga take accountability for her actions. Therefore, while Ochako may have saved Toga on a one-to-one level, and she still deserves credit for that btw, Toga ultimately died without witnessing society as a whole changing for the better. She was not saved— She was only helped… and is that a satisfying conclusion after years of buildup? After all the work to make Ochako come to value winning AND saving of everyone? Is that satisfying?

The fact that so many people refuse to believe Toga is dead points to this.

One more thing I would want to add here is a comparison to another member of the lead, someone that I have seen a lot of members of the fandom fight back against the notion that they should die. That character is Tomura Shigaraki. I’ve seen people say that Tomura should die in a sacrificial way in order to redeem himself, but then in response many fans push back and speak about how that wouldn’t solve any of Shigaraki’s problems and instead it would only leave shigaraki in a state of limbo in terms of reaching a satisfying and logical conclusion for him. Deku wouldn’t have achieved his goal to the fullest extent, society wouldn’t get to accept Tomura and show that even he is design of forgiveness after what he was put through, and we wouldn’t get to see how a reformed hero society would handle the league of villains moving forward. Sound familiar? My point in bringing this up is to show that it seemingly doesn’t make sense how you can argue how one villain should survive while the other should die because either way the death of one villain, even if it’s a heroic sacrifice, is still an incomplete rescue. It’s still an incomplete narrative, as it had framed itself to be a hopeful one, despite all the dark aspects. So, let’s just keep that in mind. 

My next point is going to be a heavy one, so buckle up. Let’s keep going with the hypothetical of Toga being really, truly dead, ok? Toga being dead has so many implications and undertones.  You can make an argument for, if she is the only league member that dies, how she is written in an upsetting way as both the only woman and canonically queer member of the league. Furthermore, the ‘Bury Your Gays’ trope is defined by killing off LGBTQ characters at an alarmingly higher rate than their heterosexual peers, and their death is usually because they entered some sort of queer relationship, or if someone has to die it might as well be the queer one. Am I saying that Horikoshi has malicious intent and hates queer people in stories? ABSOLUTELY NOT. DO NOT GO AND HARASS THE MAN BECAUSE IT ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING. But, there could be some internal bias because of Japanese society as a whole’s view of queer people. There also could be some push from editors to kill the queer character for this exact reason. Of course, this is all speculation and it’s not ok to jump to conclusions and assume the worst of writers. But Toga meant something to people. She meant something to queer people. If the reformed hero society could accept Toga for who she is, then wouldn’t that include her queerness? In a world where homophobia is increasing again at an alarming rate, kids need to see that being queer doesn’t mean that they have to be the “villain” in society’s eyes. Queer people deserve saving. But as my previous point discussed, Toga was not fully saved. Queer kids reading the manga will not get to see how Toga could find her sense of belonging in society while still living her truth. The queer subtext behind her relationship with Ochako will end in of of their deaths. Therefore, as someone with experience with living in a homophobic household and having to hide themselves, this does not feel like a happy ending.

Furthermore, I’m going to make another comparison just like I did in my previous point. But this time, I’m going to use a character from a different franchise that also involves superhero’s and is a heavy inspiration for Horikoshi’s writing. That character is Black Widow from the MCU. She was a beloved character, but often underutilized by the writers. The only female member of the avengers, Black Widow was often sexualized and used as the object of desire out of the bunch. She was badass, but always tied to her male counterparts. She was not allowed to exist without the other male avengers around. This was the pattern of her character writing for many years, up until Avengers: Endgame premiered. When that movie came out, Blackwidow played a key role… that role was to sacrifice herself. She did this so that her best friend, Hawkeye, wouldn’t have to sacrifice himself instead. He didn’t want her to sacrifice herself. He was fine with dying and tried to stop her. But despite his efforts, Blackwidow still sacrificed herself and died. This happened before she could get her own movie, and specifically before she could confront her past trauma and heal from it. She went out her way on her terms, but the audience still lost the vital piece of representation that she gave to the avengers and still suffered from never seeing Blackwidow’s character get to heal and overcome her pain. Does all of this once again sound familiar? Women often are the first to get hurt or die out of their hero or villain groups in the superhero genre. One good thing about Toga, however, is that she died alongside another female companion. A well written relationship between two women was front in center, instead of one between a man and woman. Despite that, however, Toga was often used as the sexualized member of the league and tended to revolve around Izuku a lot, just like Blackwidow. That is why it was amazing to see her bond with Ochako, and then devastating to have that taken away without letting the audience witness Toga’s complete healing.

Therefore, dying “your own way”, is only empowering if the female character had already had time to complete their character arc and heal their trauma in the same way that their male peers were allowed. Otherwise, it feels fake.

This chapter was overall amazingly well written. I enjoyed it a lot. Honestly, I enjoy MHA as a whole a lot!!! I’ve hyper-fixated on this story and tis characters a lot, and have a lot of faith in Horikoshi as a writer. I have no doubt that he’ll do a great job writing the other characters in this final arc give the audience a satisfying conclusion. I also hope that I’m proven wrong and somehow Toga ends up ok.

But the ending reminded me of how far writing has to go in order to accurately portray the female and queer experience, and to give such characters hopeful endings like everyone else. Toga deserves to find  acceptance. She deserves to find love from society as a whole, not just Ochako. 

Toga Himiko deserves a happy ending. Queer women deserve happy endings too.

Sorry to be a downer, everyone. If you want a more hopeful meta for this chapter, then please go check out @pikahlua’s blog because their meta on this chapter was spectacular and mind blowing.

[presidenthades]

Once again, I am doing a series of my behind-the-scenes thoughts for The Golds while I do light edits for formatting, typos, and continuity. Here’s Chapter 8!

(Full disclosure, I learned that TGC can sing around the time I started writing this series, and that definitely inspired singing artsy Aegon. I am still distraught about his band going “on a break.” 🥺)

For this chapter’s title, I picked the Mother lyrics from “The Song of the Seven” because it’s the childbirth chapter. The moment we’ve all been waiting for!

Joff’s hand is bandaged at the beginning of the chapter because she’s been messing around with the glass candle. Of course her loyal assistant Daeron knows about it, and he doesn’t entirely approve of her methods.

BTW I often cringe when people in fantasy stories casually cut their palms for spells and such, because your hands have a lot of muscles and nerves, so it hurts a bunch and takes a while to heal. I thought about having Joff take blood from a different body part that isn’t used all the time. Then I remembered the point of blood magic in this universe is pain and sacrifice, and I could see the magic refusing to accept blood from someone intentionally trying to avoid pain, and it only works if it hurts. So here I am, using the trope that I used to always complain about 😅.

Despite everything, Jace would not approve of Elinor’s hand being cut off, so people have been avoiding telling her.

Jace thinks Gyles is suffering at Dragonstone, but this is actually an improvement! He used to make a heckton of pies at the Red Keep, but now he only has to cook for one person. So he’s getting paid the same to do 1% of his usual workload, and he gets to be creative since he has to change the menu every meal while ensuring Jace eats a balanced diet.

Luce dresses extra neatly and arrives early so people don’t suspect she was canoodling with Aemond the night before, but this is so out of character for her that Jace notices.

During breakfast, Luce tries to play it cool and ignore Aemond while he stares at her. They had this exact same dynamic in Chaoter 9 of the Handbook, during the post-wedding breakfast. They really need to coordinate a better system when they have something to hide 🤪. (100% inspired by Aemond’s intense staring during the show when he looks at pretty much anybody.)

If Aegon and Aemond get to have sibling telepathy, so do Jace and Luce.

Luce’s rose garden reference is a callback to Chapter 1, when it’s mentioned that Aegon got handsy with Jace pre-wedding while Daemon was stalking around the hedges. Technically, Jace and Aegon were already married for years because of the elopement, and that’s how Jace justifies letting Aegon take liberties. He was already her husband so why not? 😉

Absolutely nobody expected Jace to serve as chaperone, but she blames herself anyway (as usual). If everyone wasn’t so worried about Jace’s health and if the trip preparations weren’t so hasty, I’m sure Alicent or Rhaenyra or Daemon would have insisted on sending an actual chaperone with the group.

The Episode 8 last supper bit where Jacaerys pathetically punches Aemond, who isn’t fazed at all, inspired the scene with our Jace smacking Aemond with a sandal (la chancla!). In this universe, however, Aemond can’t retaliate because Jace is a pregnant woman. He has too many chivalrous notions to strike a woman (and nobody would let him anyway). Luckily for Aemond, our Jace isn’t very strong either.

Baela has been corresponding with Cregan the last few months. Not so frequently that it raises eyebrows, but often enough that they’ve gotten to know each other better. She definitely sent a letter of condolence after Sara died, so she’s expecting a response. Unfortunately, Cregan is not reacting well to his sister’s death, and it feels like the latest in a series of Starks getting screwed whenever they interact with Targs. Jaehaerys and Alysanne made the Starks donate land to the Night’s Watch who neglected it, Jaehaerys showed mercy to rebels which led to Walton Stark’s death, Rhaenys arranged for a Stark daughter to marry Ronnel Arryn (who was usurped and thrown out the Moon Door; his wife and children probably weren’t spared either), and there are probably still some complicated feelings about Torrhen kneeling to Aegon I. Now the Northmen probably feel the Targs caused Sara’s death too, so Cregan, who is also grieving, backs away from Baela and arranges to marry a Northern girl.

Rhaenyra deliberately omits news of the Baratheon betrothal in her letter to Jace. Like everyone else, she’s trying to reduce Jace’s stressors.

Aemond’s letter has the king’s personal seal. He’s confused why Viserys would bother writing to him.

Aegon’s letter is most likely from Alicent, and it mentions something about the Baratheons. I don’t think Alicent explicitly reveals the betrothal, but there’s enough detail that Aegon figures out something is fishy. He has a good poker face when he chooses to use it, so Jace can’t tell what his reaction is.

Aemond leaves because he wants to yell at Viserys, and Luce follows to stop him from getting in trouble. They’re gone all day because they stop somewhere along the Blackwater to argue about what to do, and eventually Luce convinces him to come back to Dragonstone. When they return in the middle of the night, Aegon sneaks out to get the details from them, and that’s when they all agree on a cover story to tell Jace.

Aegon is constantly checking Jace’s pulse because he’s worried about her anxiety 😮‍💨.

Luce is trying very hard not to cry during her convo with Jace. Normally Jace is the first person she confides in about this sort of thing, but she can’t right now 😢.

Jace has a PTSD flashback, and she instinctively/inadvertently uses grounding techniques (mostly centered on Aegon) to get out of it. Westeros doesn’t have much psychological understanding or vocabulary, so I imagine a lot of conditions/symptoms get swept under the category of “madness.” Jace doesn’t entirely know why her brain and body are acting the way they do, so she worries she’s losing her mind.

I’m not a doctor so don’t quote me, but based on my amateur internet research, stress and trauma during pregnancy can cause preterm labor, and Jace has experienced a lot of stress and trauma. I was determined for Cheeseball to be born healthy, so I made him born around 37 weeks/3 weeks early. Not too early, but he’s cutting it close in a world without NICU equipment. I also read that babies born early are likelier to be breech, presumably because they’re on the small side.

Pregnant women sometimes begin “nesting” when the baby is imminent, so Jace spends the morning organizing the baby knits. And the baby might be less active than usual right before labor, which Aegon notices.

Joff is using her little hourglass to time Jace’s contractions 💀.

Jace is telling herself to be brave because “a woman’s battlefield is in the childbed,” or however the saying goes.

Why does Joff know so much about different types of fire? Because she and Daeron were trying all the different ways to light the glass candle on fire 🔥.

Rhaenyra still has unresolved trauma from Aemma’s death, so she decides to keep Aegon from the birthing chamber out of fear that he would make the same choice as Viserys if something goes wrong. When the maester and midwives are debating what to do, Rhaenyra thinks, “of course we’re saving a Jace, she’s my daughter, we aren’t killing her in the hopes of a male heir.” She overcorrects in the opposite direction as Viserys, not realizing she’s acting kinda similarly by taking the choice from Jace. By Westerosi standards, Rhaenyra is also overstepping because the expectation is it’s the father’s right to decide, certainly not the baby’s maternal grandmother’s right. Alicent thinks Aegon deserves to be in the room and have a say in what happens, so she fetches him regardless of Rhaenyra’s feelings.

I did a little reading about the history of childbirth (skip this bullet if you might be squicked by details, though I’m not going to be graphic). A child in breech has always been a big concern but isn’t necessarily fatal; it has higher odds of being injured in the birth canal, or being strangled by the umbilical cord. If the baby really does get stuck, there are ways to extract it to save the mother, but the baby almost certainly dies (and it’s quite awful how they take it out). And historically, the mother was actually chosen over the baby quite often until some church reforms happened and pushed for the baby’s survival via C-section, which had very high odds of killing the mother. So I have a lot of conspiracy thoughts about whether Aemma really was beyond saving in Episode 1, or whether the maester just told Viserys that so they could try to get the baby 🧐.

I feel like Jace could have convinced Aegon to pick the baby…and then Aegon would spend the rest of his life depressed and drinking himself into an early grave 😔. If he were somehow forced to remarry and have more kids, he would be Viserys 2.0 and favor Cheeseball over any children by his second wife. Thankfully, that didn’t happen in this universe!

I know people have a lot of questions about what Joff did with the candle, but I have to save a lot of that info for future fics! Just bear in mind that like it says in the fandom wiki, glass candles are supposedly able to give its wielder visions and dreams. I also gave the candle some qualities as an arcane focus, like in D&D. Oh, and I read on a fan forum speculating that the glass candles might be like palantirs from LOTR, so there’s that. And here, Joff uses Aegon’s blood for the ritual because he’s the baby’s father, so there’s a strong connection she utilizes to coax the baby out.

Joff puts out the candle right before the others come into the room, so nobody except Jace and Aegon (and probably Daeron) know that anything magical was involved.

During the Middle Ages, birthing rooms were kept warm and sealed because they were afraid a draft/the cold would be bad for the mother and baby. But Jace is both a Targaryen and a Velaryon, and she wants to hear her dragon and the sea, dammit.

“The sun wishes to meet the sun.” Sorry, I couldn’t resist making a pun with sun/son.

Royal and noble women overwhelmingly prefer using wet nurses (partly as a status symbol, partly so they can get back to conceiving more heirs quicker, partly so they can focus on other duties). But the ASOIAF-verse does have examples of royal and noble women breastfeeding (see some of the citations on that page if you want to dig in), including the original Queen Rhaenys. So Jace breastfeeding her child is very unusual but not unheard of. And I wanted to give Jace the psychological benefits of breastfeeding, since she’s been in a shaky mental and emotional state.

Babies and children die super easily in the pre-modern world. Just look at how many of Jaehaerys and Alysanne’s kids died super young! It’s why Aegon’s second nameday was such a big deal in the show; he survived infancy, which was the most perilous time. That’s why Jace knows that despite producing a son, she and Aegon will be expected to have more kids. It’s too risky not to.

Since we’re already bringing in LOTR with the palantir vibes, I decided to add some One Ring vibes too. Aegon senses some bad juju from the candle but he’s not magically inclined at all, so he shrugs it off. Jace isn’t super into magic either, but she’s mentally and emotionally vulnerable so the candle taps into her weaknesses more easily. I’ll probably flesh out the system more in the future Joff fic.

The culture of chivalry and courtly love seems to be strongest in the Reach. Daeron picked up on the art of giving flowery compliments while he was there. Unfortunately Joff doesn’t care about that sort of thing.

Daeron knows the candle isn’t entirely “good,” but he’s too used to following Joff’s example and doing whatever she wants. This is probably going to be part of his character arc.

Aegon, in his best Ron Swanson voice, to Dragonstone’s gardeners: “You may have thought you heard me say I wanted a lot of roses. But what I said was: give me all the roses you have.”

The lyrics in Cheeseball’s song convey the sentiments that Aegon wishes he’d heard from his father growing up, and now Aegon is ensuring that Cheeseball hears his own father say/sing those things every day 🥹. And Aegon makes sure to put both Targaryen and Velaryon references in the song to commemorate Jace’s family.

Chapter 9 commentary here

[dekusleftsock]

I have to say that your post on Deku peddling a lot of casual homophobia and toxic masculinity across the manga, was really interesting and eye-opening. I mostly agree with you, except the part about bkdk supposedly being the endgame for this particular arc. I've had similar thoughts about how gender and sexuality is portrayed in MHA, for quite a while, but the conclusion I always came to, was more along the lines of "Reject Masculinity; Embrace Lesbianism". As I've just stumbled upon this blog, I must therefore ask: how do you feel about transbian Deku hcs?

Oh it’s so fun! Trans lesbian deku is awesome, I love all trans hc’s so much.

Unfortunately though, I am also a bkdk shipper and my opinions in that post are about my genuine thoughts that, yes, deku is a cisgender gay man, and there’s no real problem with that. Welcome to my blog though!

A lot of my posts do focus on bkdk and togachako (while mainly togachako for the past couple of months), so that’s just your fair warning! If you aren’t into that it’s like… kind of impossible to avoid that shipping on my blog. I often post fanart and metas/shitposts that focus on those two ships solely.

And I will say, I feel like the notion of “rejecting masculinity”, especially as a trans masculine person myself, does often fall down anti trans rhetoric and spaces, as lesbianism and masculinity aren’t even necessarily contrasting things to be. NB is an identity that can be stretched so far into so many spaces that it’s kind of hard to reject masculinity OR femininity without well… falling into exclusion.

I’m not sure if that’s what you mean though, however I do enjoy most if not all trans hc’s because they are amazing and so interesting when people really dive into a characters internalized issues having to do with that identity. Transgenderism is so maleable and can easily apply to so many different types of characters, even giving them a deeper sense of depth.

Canonically though, I think I like Izuku how he is. Because everyone has issues, and while cis men have obviously had a lot of stories where they are the center of attention, told from their perspective, Izuku is unique in his own right; because how often do we really see a short, androgynous, emotionally expressive, cis male character deal with things like the insecurity of crying, the unknown of if your identity (if it really is your identity) will be accepted in spaces where you have been pushed to be with, from your perspective, a platonic female friend? Because yes, izuku WAS bullied—rather indirectly with Katsuki sure—but the little comments made about being a crybaby, being creepy, being weak, they all build up. They build and build until, hey, the bully isn’t there anymore. In fact, the bully is you.

And really, I see why people don’t necessarily pick up on Izuku of all people having masculinity issues. When the viewer sees a momma’s boy who’s relatively soft and empathetic, they register someone who vaguely understands themself. They see him be self sacrificial and think, “that’s a man who goes against masculine stereotypes, so obviously he doesn’t struggle with fitting into the stereotype himself!” Because it’s not what we’re usually shown in our every day media.

A man with masculinity issues is someone who is SUPER masculine—he’s super buff, he screams a lot, he has anger issues, he—oh wait I’m describing Katsuki.

Yet, in reality, Katsuki actually DOESNT! Not as much as Izuku does anyway. In middle school? Sure, most definitely. He registered weakness and refused to accept himself, therefore his masculinity. The anger issues build and build on each other… except for the fact that we’re forgetting the key here.

Katsuki grew up.

Katsuki HAD to grow up because the way he expressed these anger issues (that I will say, izuku also shares, the crying is literally a symptom of that in a lot of cases) was much more prevalent. It stopped him from truly growing, and when he was humbled he was able to see all the mistakes he was making. And slowly but surely, he apologized. He sacrificed. He started to really, truly, care.

He always cared of course, seeing as he cared enough to try to stop deku from getting into UA, because he thought he was a threat. Hell, after the entrance exam at their first day of UA, he genuinely thought Izuku had enough heroics in him to make it past the entrance exam! He didn’t think Izuku even NEEDED a quirk to get in. He’s always believed in him.

Was that expressed through his insecurities? Yes, because he was a dumb 15 year old.

But now that he knows he cares, that’s allowed him to reflect on himself, and on Izuku.

Izuku ofc will change, he will grow up, he will get that character development, but he has to have that realization that, oh, Katsuki really won’t hate him for anything. Ever.

Whether Izuku has internalized homophobia simply because Katsuki isn’t a girl, or because he’s afraid of Katsuki’s rejection at Izuku’s weirdness, well, I guess that’s up to your interpretation.

Mine is personally on the second side though.

[fanonical]

So in your mind what’s w the garudo? To me they seem to think presentation = gender way more than the other peoples.

But in your version what’ll you be doing? Sorry if this one’s a bit blugh

no, i think you hit it square on the head. there is some semblance of a gender binary culturally recognised by the gerudo (they, after all, interact with men all the time) but as of BOTW/TOTK, the traditional gerudo culture dictates young gerudo girls of a certain age move to Gerudo City, which forbids men from entry. that's how it is on paper, anyway -- in actual fact, Link can walk right up to the guards in front of Gerudo City, be perceived as a "guy" and thus refused entry, then change into women's clothing IN FRONT OF THEM, and be allowed in, whereupon there is nothing Link can do to be kicked out from Gerudo City other than change out of the outfit.

In reality, the Doylist answer to this is it's a videogame abstraction -- and the whole thing is rather transphobic & racist too; a lot of the stuff going on with the Gerudo is between "kinda" and "very" racist just in general. i don't know how to (or if i adequately can?) address all of the problems there in my fic? . "desert race of giantess middle eastern warrior women" goes pretty deep to the core with this one, and that's before you get onto Ganondorf. and the whole stuff with the crossdressing... look man, if other people thought the Vilia storyline was meant to be progressive or sympathetic, i guess i'm glad they got that out of it, but it felt like a big transphobic joke to me. i'm changing pretty much all of this, and a bunch of other stuff. i still think it's not gonna be perfect (not really for me to say how unsalvageable some of the Gerudo stuff is in terms of racism, but i think i'm gonna reach out and talk to a couple of my friends about it and how they feel and what they might do etc) but i'll be changing stuff, and emphasising the good changes Nintendo has made over time whilst rejecting the worse ones

one thing i think i will do on the transphobia front is change it so that Gerudo City will allow trans women inside the walls if we are actively performing femininity to some degree. now, this is of course transphobic too, but i think it's kind of interesting to explore a more complex situation where trans women are a recognised type of person, and by the official legal policies of Gerudo City accepted in as women, but because of overtly binaristic, cisnormative overtones to the society, culture, politics & history there are probably still quite varying reactions, responses to transfemininity etc. because, well, that's my experience in a lot of gendered/women-only spaces! and i'd love to explore that through Link.

i also think that just before the Great Calamity, maybe there weren't as many openly trans people across Hyrule, perhaps due to social conceptions about gender at the time; i think maybe in the pockets of surviving towns and cities and villages 100 years later whilst Link has been asleep, trans people have become more recognised and embraced to some extent -- including in Gerudo City -- but, like in the real world, the change is slow, and some people struggle to see past their preconceived notions about gender. i just think it's more interesting to relate aspects of a #trans Hyrule to the trans experience now (i.e. in a time of great cultural shift for trans people both for good and for bad) but also exploring how and why it would be different in a fantasy post-apocalypse lol. i also don't want to overdo it into a depressive circlejerk of trans misery, either though, so don't worry, it won't be like that, i am making sure to steer very very clear of this.

i do also have maybe some potential reasons as to why there's been a cultural shift on transness in Hyrule (and particularly Gerudo City) in the 100 years after the Calamity though -- and i'd love to say more, but unfortunately, i've already said too much 🤐 gotta leave soooome stuff for the fic, and i have to check some stuff against lore before i commit to it.

great question!

[hautsreadsmarvel]

Back-to-back issues of “the Fantastic Four”! (1961, issues 8-9)

Issue 8 is basically about the Thing, and that means it’s a delight.

Reed is working on a project and refuses to let the Thing get near or learn anything about it; this spate of apparent ostracization pushes Thing over the edge and makes him desert the Four briefly.

Villain is a guy who can hypnotize others by making effigies of them from radioactive clay and then maneuvering them like puppets. Not going to bother with most of the plot, but the Puppet Master has a blind daughter, Alicia, whose sharp senses can not only pick out the Invisible Girl’s heartbeat, but also can sense the personality of a person thru touch. She “can sense a gentleness to [the Thing]--there is something tragic--something sensitive!”

Of course, by law of irony, the project Reed was working on was a way to restore the Thing’s cherished human form. The Thing is still the only way to squeeze any personality out of Reed, but I’m starting to enjoy their interactions.

And this is the point at which Thing becomes more than just one of the few multi-dimensional characters - he starts to change! He’s willing to show his heart in this moment, expressing worry that under the Puppet Master’s spell he might’ve hurt the same kid he often threatens to smack around during their spats.

Obviously, Alicia’s attracted to him, and her acceptance of and affability towards him will likely change him up some more, too.

The action is alright. It turns out that Reed is immune to bullets (if eventually exhausted by the deformations they cause on impact), which tragically means that beloved Reedball was meaningless.

Similarly tragic is the high likelihood that Johnny Storm has mesothelioma. The explanation from the next issue on “how” he flies only really explains how he rises into the air (once again I assert his thrust must come from pyrokinesis) but it’s full of a lot of other nifty explanations re: him training, studying, and managing his time to optimize use of his power. Love that shit.

In Issue 9, Reed (presumably) buys high and sells low, rendering the F4 so broke they sell off their headquarters and have their vehicles rendered down to parts sold as memorabilia. It’s so funny to me that the guy who is regularly proclaimed as one of Marvel’s “smartest people in the world” apparently sucks at stock market. Also interestingly, Reed brings up the notion that there is a cost of operations for the F4, which, obviously duh, but I didn’t think that’d ever come up (maybe because these early comics are obviously targeted at kids and logistics don’t seem like a good match for that, or maybe because it’s a “realistic” subject and that doesn’t seem to be a high priority for these mags).

Immeasurably “based”, Thing. Horrid showerthought - if these comics were just coming out today, the Torch would absolutely be speaking contemporary teenslang.

Alicia really is causing character change! Thing and Spider-Man, the only two beings in this universe who have experienced any evolution so far. Speaking of, our next Spider-Man issue is… TWENTY TWO ISSUES AWAY? NOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo (spoiler: Spider-Man continues being peak)

They get an offer from Hollywood to star in a movie about themselves for $1M (equivalent to $10.6M USD today). The producer turns out to be Namor (who looks simultaneously uncanny and sharp asf in a suit), who legitimately funds the film via recovered sunken treasure, and fuck me the love triangle is back

Anyways this is all just a ploy to put everyone who isn’t Sue in mortal peril. Much as I liked the earlier parts of this issue, there is a fantastically racist depiction of a “tribe” (think Zulu stereotype, I’m not snapping a picture of that shit)

Aw c'mon Namor. Why you gotta be so sexism. Don't say "female" like that, Namor.

Anyways at the end of the story, he does give them the money, as promised. A little weird since he patently expected his schemes would kill three of them off, but that kind of honor redeems Namor a little from the earlier genderisms. Great first half to issue 9, prejudicial content bogs down the second half. Hoping to see more Thing growth (and other character developments in general), less Reed-Sue-Namor affection contest (unless it resolves into a throuple, which obviously won't happen), and less -isms.